Dustin Ybarra and Adam Carolla Write the Greatest Movie of All Time

Summary

Podcast Summary

Adam Carolla Show

Episode: Dustin Ybarra and Adam Carolla Write the Greatest Movie of All Time
Date: October 1, 2025
Host: Adam Carolla
Guests: Dustin Ybarra (comedian), Alicia Krause (Washington Examiner)
Main Theme:
A classic Carolla Show blend of cultural commentary, mockery, and improvisation, centered on pop culture news, trans issues, and an extended, hilarious session where Adam and Dustin brainstorm a blockbuster action movie—“Sky Rider”—in real time.

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Episode Overview

This episode begins with panel banter about the Super Bowl halftime show controversy and headlines swirling around Bad Bunny, segues through J.K. Rowling and Emma Watson’s trans rights feud, hits hard on evolving progressive activism, and finally explodes into comedic brilliance as Dustin Ybarra and Adam Carolla co-write a blockbuster action script live on-air. The signature Carolla wit, unapologetic rants, and improv energy are in top form.

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Key Discussion Points and Segments

1. Super Bowl Halftime Show Controversy

[02:23 – 17:17]

• Bad Bunny Chosen as Headliner:

  • Adam and Alicia riff on the cultural shift of Super Bowl performances toward “younger, hipper” artists and the conspicuous absence of rock acts in recent years.
    • “Why is a rock group off the table? It’s been something other than rock for 11 years. ... Let’s just switch it up a little bit.” – Adam [05:28]

• Societal Shift & America’s Image:

  • Adam’s take on the halftime show as a cultural flex—“We start the proceedings with God Bless America and a flyover from an F18... then we get the Hispanic bitch to come bag on us and settle our hash at halftime.” [05:59]
  • Frustration at political messaging during halftime—especially referencing J. Lo’s performance centered on border politics.

• Advertising, Brand Boosts:

  • Dissection of why artists perform (not big pay, but ROI); Alicia highlights the massive “halo effect” on streaming/music sales.

2. J.K. Rowling vs Emma Watson: Gender Politics & Cancel Culture

[17:17 – 34:41]

• Emma Watson’s Diplomatic Stance:

  • Plays and discusses Watson’s statement on “holding two incompatible things”—gratitude for Rowling; difference on trans issues. [21:10]
    • “There's just no world in which I could ever cancel her out... I can love her. I can know she loved me.…But the bigger thing is just what she’s done will never be taken away from me.” – Emma Watson [21:10]

• Rowling’s Savage Response:

  • Rowling calls Watson privileged, “ignorant” of real life, and labels the condemnation of her as “not quite as fashionable as it was.” [23:19]
    • “Emma has so little experience of real life… she’s ignorant of how ignorant she is.” – Rowling (read by Alicia) [22:14]

• Adam’s Marketing Rant:

  • Riffs on the scale of culture shift: “We have to convince people that men are women and women are men ... that has got to be the greatest undertaking of humanity. This is much bigger than the Hoover Dam or World War II or the Panama Canal.” [27:05]
  • How fear and social pressure drive conformity on gender and political issues; comparison to historical peer-pressured societies.

3. Trans Issues & Grievance Movements

[34:41 – 46:01]

• Transition Regret:

  • Clip of a detransitioned individual who blames the “grievance movement” for fast-tracking medicalization of children.
    • “We had gotten everything we wanted. And I think trans jumped into all of the orgs… and they lobbied to make gender identity protected.” [35:16]

• Adam’s Sociological Hypotheses:

  • Claims that the “grievance business” is endless—no social concession ever satisfies activists.
  • Argues western culture’s current wave of transitions is peer-driven and, if permitted, even more social “transitions” (e.g., between races) could become trends in youth culture. [39:22]

• Monetization of Transition Surgeries:

  • Adam and Alicia share and react to a clip of a Vanderbilt hospital official candidly discussing the financial incentives for gender surgeries.
    • "Female to male chest reconstruction can bring in $40,000 a patient…" [42:09]

• COVID, Good Science, and Shifting Messaging:

  • Critique of “good science” vs dissenting science in media, parallels to pandemic discourse and the suppression of alternative opinions.

4. Tim Allen’s Forgiveness & the Security State

[44:07 – 46:01]

• Tim Allen finds empathy:

  • Inspired by Erica Kirk’s eulogy, Tim forgives his father's killer after 60 years.
    • “I forgive the man who killed my father. Peace be with you all.” [44:48]

• Increasing Public Figure Security:

  • Anecdotes about escalating security at live events—not just for headliners, but for attendees, reflecting political and cultural polarization.

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5. The Greatest Movie Ever (Sky Rider): Adam Carolla & Dustin Ybarra’s Live Movie Pitch

[50:48 – 105:03]

Introduction and Setup:

• Adam welcomes Dustin, riffs on the “metal detector guy vs recumbent bike guy” as the lowest tier of hobbyists. Dustin shares his finds and oddball stories from metal detecting at LA beaches. [50:53 – 61:59]

Brainstorming their Movie:

Premise:

• Washed-up, ace pilot (The Rock), once a Blue Angel, now skywriter, is thrust into heroic action when international terrorists unleash a swarm of weaponized drones at the LA Olympics.

Plot Beats Highlighted Live:

• Opening: Adam sketches a “San Andreas meets Top Gun meets Sky High” set-up. Down-on-his-luck, the protagonist lives above a flight school run by a foul-mouthed old woman (à la Ruth Gordon). [66:58–69:59]
• Romantic Interest:
  • He meets a beautiful, recently heartbroken woman when she tries to stop him writing a sky message to her cheating boyfriend; they spark a connection over drinks at his tiny apartment. [72:00–75:03]
• Comic Relief/Supporting Cast:
  • Dustin pitches himself as the pot-smoking mechanic/comic relief. [70:05–70:15]
• Terrorist Threat:
  • “Johnny Quest” style international, non-country-specific terrorists activate a plan to attack the Olympics using weaponized drones; opening act is the destruction of the Goodyear Blimp. [80:02–84:09]
• Action Set-Pieces:
  • The protagonist is the only one able to fly—the terrorists use an EMP to disable all advanced aircraft, but his vintage skywriting plane (biplane) is too “analog” to be affected.
  • Adam imagines sweeping cinematic LA scenes as the city’s diverse denizens—rich, poor, stoners, hipsters, gardeners—notice the swarm overhead. [94:27–96:17]
• Climax:
  • The skywriter has to replicate the dangerous move that got him kicked out of the Blue Angels. Communicates via radio to the president (an Angela Bassett-style, bald Black female commander-in-chief); exchanges heartfelt final words with his estranged daughter. [97:16–99:09]
    • “Promise me you’ll light a candle. That’s where the tears start flowing.” – Adam [98:57]
• Coda:
  • He survives by crash-landing into a kid’s inflatable bouncy castle at a beach birthday party; a fat kid hands him a cupcake—pure Carolla punchline. [100:32–102:04]
• Casting and Poster: Contemplation of leads, needing a “hot, age-appropriate” Latina, Rosario Dawson-type love interest, and discussion of skywriting for promotion. [104:09–104:54]

Memorable Quote:

• “What do you mean ‘we’? ... you made some contributions, but I feel the main plot points ...” – Adam, mock-arguing movie rights with Dustin [103:24]

META:
This sequence is peak Carolla: escalation from everyday absurdity, running bits, relentless “punching up,” and packing in every trope from ’80s and ’90s action blockbusters, exploiting racial, political, and genre clichés for laughs.

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Notable Quotes & Timestamps

• Adam on society’s about-face on gender:

  • “This is much bigger than the Hoover Dam or World War II or the Panama Canal. This is the biggest human endeavor ever—to convince people…in 10 years.” [27:05]

• Alicia on Watson/Rowling feud:

  • “She hopes she can continue to love people who disagree with her. ... Rowling did not like that and is not over the feud.” [22:14]

• Dustin on metal detecting:

  • “Poor people lose custody of their kids…rich people lose rings and jewelry.” [53:04]

• Adam and Dustin riffing:

  • “Old metal detector guy, fine. Young guy, kind of cool…But middle age detector guy, which you’re heading toward…” – Adam [62:05]

• On their film’s climax:

  • “He’s flying that thing, dead stick…he sees a kid’s inflatable castle…” – Adam [100:32–102:04]

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Segment Timestamps

• Super Bowl/Bad Bunny Rant: [02:23–17:17]
• Rowling vs. Watson & Trans Discussion: [17:17–34:41, expands to 46:01]
• Forgiveness, Tim Allen: [44:07–46:01]
• Adam & Dustin’s “Sky Rider” Movie: [50:48–105:03]

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Tone and Flavor

• Signature Carolla: A blend of irreverent, explicit, observational humor with genuine sociological insight, unfiltered rants, and self-aware lampooning of Hollywood formulas and cultural pieties.
• Dustin Ybarra’s Vibe: Down-to-earth, self-deprecating, comedic wingman, expertly volleying Adam’s improv energy.

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Useful for New Listeners

If you’re new or missed this episode: expect fast-paced pop culture takes that don’t spare sacred cows, a full-throttle, laugh-out-loud “writer’s room” that tangles with the absurdity of Hollywood blockbusters, and more than a few segments that’ll push at the edges of political correctness—in Carolla’s unfiltered signature style.

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In Summary

This episode is a high-energy, quintessentially Carolla blend of media mockery, culture war lampooning, and creative chaos—with Adam and Dustin co-writing a wildly over-the-top action film that lampoons every trope, only to end in pure comedy.

Transcript

[A]

In this episode, Alicia Krause is going to do the news and our good friend Dustin Ybarra, very funny comedian is back. We do a made up movie. I think you guys will enjoy this one because it's been a while and we'll do all that right after this.

[B]

Adam Carolla returns to New York City Thursday, October 9th at Rodney Dangerfield's Comedy Club with Cat Timpf and Matt Friend. Two shows October 9th and then don't miss the Ace man in Pottstown, Pennsylvania on Friday, October 10th and Saturday, October 11th at Soul Adam returns to Flappers in Burbank on October 29th. Get tickets for these and every [e-mail].

[A]

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[B]

From Corolla One Studios in Glendale, California, this is the Adam Carolla Show. Adam's guest today, comedian Dustin Ibarra. Plus the news and trending topics with the Washington Examiner's Alicia Crouse. And now totally buzzed about the super bowl halftime announcement. He's a huge Bad Bunny fan.

[A]

Adam Carolla yeah, get it on. Got to get on his judgment. Get it on.

[C]

Did everybody that groan that you gave about the halftime show. Well I lost a bet by the way. I did not bet Bad Bunny. Did you have any guesses?

[A]

I had BTO was the band I chose Bachman Turner Overdrive, everybody. You know I was in a appliance store and it was like a Saturday last Saturday and high end place. Like the kind of place you'd see a $13,000 refrigerator like place where Nancy Pelosi gets there like a nice true one with the refrigerator. Let me finish my but yes I place. You do what Drew does. That's what Drew does. I go like a place where Nancy like a something clear. That's all right. Drew's the best at that. You'll only be secondary.

[C]

Thank you for having us back.

[A]

Yes, the kind of refrigerator Nancy Pelosi would have is there. And yes, the glass. Cool.

[C]

So you can see her Haagen Dazs ice cream.

[A]

You can see all the chocolate. All the high end imported chocolate ice cream. So. And again, it's like, it's insane because you could spend $11,000 on an oven. And I was like, my house was $11,000. My mom would buy a car for like $600, like when I was a kid, you know? And it's just a bunch of rich white people kind of tooling around, looking at Sub Zero and Wolf and Gaggingaw. But they have a little, like, patio section. And it was like an outdoor. Hey, speakers in a rock, you know, whatever. And it's turned up and it's just rap. And rap's like, fuck the police, Fuck this, Fuck that bitch. I backhand you, bitch. And it's like, it's just a bunch of middle aged white people. And. And I thought, why is the default setting always, like, the young things? Like, the young, the young. I don't know. Does everyone want to hear the young shit all the time?

[C]

But I don't know that if it's like, millennial or older white people. I'm just presuming in la, in a place with money. They are the ones that grew up on, like, NWA and Eminem. And now that I get it that young music is a match for young.

[A]

People, but now everyone's in their 50s and it's a Saturday and we're looking at Sub Zeros, and maybe we should have some Bach. I had a little jazz or something. There's nothing wrong with jazz. Like, jazz is good and it's universally good. Like, good, not progressive, whatever, just jazz. Just as you. As you know, as you knew it, good jazz. And here's what I'm saying, no objection. You're not going to offend anybody. And also, I don't need to get my party on at the appliance store in Reseda. I can just look around.

[C]

So are you saying that. That you wish instead of Bad Bunny for the super bowl halftime show, that it would just be like a Al dimiola?

[A]

I don't know. I just. No, what I'm saying is why is a rock group off the table? It's been something other than rock for 11 years. I'm saying, let's just switch it up a little bit.

[C]

My money was on Morgan Whelan or post Malone, my 12 year old was rooting for Taylor Swift. She was like, she had a whole theory about like, well, she has to do it before she marries Travis Kelce. And then they're gonna have babies and she's gonna settle down.

[A]

And also, I don't know, here's another thing. And look, maybe I'm getting over my skis here, but the super bowl has a flyover for a reason. Cause it's fucking America. America. You know, it's America. You know, we do a flyover because that's what we're doing. Like, that's. We're flexing. And then the halftime entertainment starts off by making some sort of shitty statement about America. Like, what? How would that. Why do we do that? Why don't we just take the most American and roll it right into the halftime? Why do we have to. You know, you can watch the J. Lo doc, it's the best. The JLO doc happened to chronicle her while she was gonna do the halftime show. And her greatest concern during the halftime show because Trump was president at the time, is she needed to highlight kids in cages at the border. So what I'm saying is we start the proceedings God bless America with God bless America and a flyover from an F18. And then we get the Hispanic bitch to come bag on us and fucking settle our hash at halftime. Why are we doing that? And by the way, they would never put up with that. If there's some big lesbian concert or something, they would go, well, let's get Adam Carolla, talk a little sense into him in the middle, right? Never. They would never dream.

[C]

Never. Ask Lee Greenwood.

[A]

Yeah, let's get Toby Keith son out here and Lee Greenwood. No, they go, no, no more lesbians.

[B]

You know, it's funny, I never really thought of this, but if you're correct, and I think you are, then they've just eliminated the chance for the flyby and the God bless America by just announcing that someone who doesn't speak English or perform in English is going to.

[C]

No, they'll still have that. He's always at the top.

[B]

No, I know, I know, but what I'm saying, it's the preemptive strike on that. We're throwing Bad Bunny at you right now.

[C]

I mean, Bad Bunny is a good artist and he's very popular.

[A]

Yeah. So.

[C]

But I just, I guess I was surprised because he skews younger and I thought that they were going for like a 40 plus family audience. I don't know.

[A]

Switch it up. That's all I'm Saying Kenny G doing.

[B]

A Chuck Mangione tribute.

[A]

You know, it's so funny, as I was listening to Chuck Mangione on the way to look at appliances with the other white people. That's proper appliance music that should have been pumped in. I was listening to that song Feel so Good or the album, and it's like Chuck, Chuck, Chuck and his flugelhorn. The guy who's doing the heavy lifting on songs. The guy playing the jazz guitar. Oh, yeah, he's going all. He's the guy Chuck's kind of putting away. You know, he does a nice little da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da. Here's what I'm saying in that song. I could find anybody in any 9th grade orchestra that was first chair in the trumpet department and I could teach him Chuck's part, the jazz guitar part. That's 20 years in the making.

[C]

That's a different skill.

[A]

See, that guy did a lot more work than Chuck and had a great riff and never got any credit for it.

[C]

Although, like the last 10ish years.

[A]

Yeah, we can't clear this elevator.

[B]

I know your dad plays.

[A]

Oh, my dad.

[C]

That was like, good elevator music vibe.

[A]

That's my dad. Yeah. Did you have. Who played the guitar in that song? I wonder if it's anybody we know.

[C]

Like, if it was a studio musician. No, like, it was like a famous person.

[A]

Yeah, like the guy from Toto played the Michael Jackson stuff. You know, Slash played in the. I don't know, another Michael Jackson song or something like that. Yeah, yeah, they'd get. Yeah, I mean, Eddie Van Halen. Eddie Van Halen. Sorry. Yeah, not Slash. Guy's a good guitarist. He's a good guitarist. And then they'll just sit in and play on a.

[B]

You know Stevie Ray Vaughan played on David Bowie's Modern Love.

[A]

Oh, yeah, I heard that. Yeah. Yeah, it happens all the time. So you kind of. I wonder who that guy was. Or maybe he's just in his band. But look, here's the thing. Bad Bunny is like in Puerto Rico right now and not coming back from Puerto Rico because of Trump or something.

[C]

Oh, disappointing.

[A]

He's got some Trump issues, but he'll.

[C]

Come here to make a shit ton of money at the most American game of the whole year.

[A]

And. Yeah, and I don't think they make a shit ton of money, but I.

[C]

Think, yeah, they do everything, like all the promo and stuff around it, like the roi, Even if the check for the actual performance isn't awesome, like everything surrounding it, you know, they're making like the marketing opportunities, the branding opportunities, the. All of the eyeballs that, like, then go to Spotify and download their music. Rihanna, like, when she did it.

[A]

Yeah. They don't make a. They don't.

[C]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

You didn't let me finish what I said, but of course, I understand. It helps the brand. Yes. They don't get paid a lot, but they get all the promotion. Yes. Sorry.

[B]

A guitar player for Chuck Mangione, a session man named Grant Geisman.

[A]

And that's it.

[B]

He played on themes for Family Affair. Boy Meets World, Touched by An Angel, Dawson's Creek.

[A]

Dawson's Creek. All right, here's J. Lo. I put this together at the time because J. Lo, her entire raison d' et was to raise awareness of kids in cages at the halftime. Which, again, the flyover of the F18s is like, that's America. And then this bitch in kids and cages is anti America.

[C]

Surprised she didn't haul AOC Fake crying out there.

[A]

But she was very upset about it.

[C]

The cages, the image of the cages, for me, like, I couldn't believe what I was watching. There's just certain things as a human being you don't.

[A]

Certain things you don't hear. Hard drive. Oh, hard drive. All right. I like the sad music. She's so upset about it.

[C]

What is my message?

[A]

All she did was shake her ass.

[C]

This is a dark subject matter, but if we can get the message across in a beautiful way where it's soft and it can be received, then maybe more people get the message.

[A]

By the way, I haven't heard her say shit about kids in cages. Is she done with this substance?

[C]

Not just us out there shaking our fucking asses and fucking belly dancing. I want something real.

[A]

I put this together. All she did was shake her ass.

[C]

I'm facing the biggest crossroads of my life. But to take out the cages and sacrifice what I believe in would be like never being there at all.

[A]

It's a great metaphor for all celebrities, which is you talk about kids in cages, then you just shake your fucking coolie, get paid and go home. And by the way, no more talk about kids in cages. She seems to be off the subject now.

[B]

Ironically, a decade ago, she had women dancing in cages on her stage show.

[A]

Probably.

[C]

I didn't even recognize the correlation. If it's not an obvious political statement, is it a failed political statement? Whether it's left, right, or center?

[A]

Well, the problem is people go. They go. Like, it'd be me going, listen, I wanna wear an NRA clip on my lapel when I go out at Lilith Fair and make my stage announcement. And then they'd go, we don't want you wearing your NRA clip on your lapel. What if we just did like an R and an A, but not the nra? And I'd go, well, all right, better than no. And then you get something confusing. And then like, what is he. So, yeah, she wanted kids in cages. And the NFL went, we're not gonna put the kids in the cages. She went, well, what if we just want, like, a couple of hoops?

[C]

Okay, that matched my sparkly ass chest.

[A]

Yeah. And we bedazzled them. And then, yeah, they would match the thong that's going up my ass when I shake it with Shakura, because I'm shaking my ass for kids in cages. And then later on, Trump got out, and then Biden showed up, and then there was more kids in cages or Obama invented kids in cages, and she didn't seem to care.

[C]

And more deportations.

[A]

Right. So she didn't.

[D]

She's.

[A]

I know she's off of kids in cages, but if anyone knows Jayla, they should ask her. You, you seem very obsessed with kids in cages for a long period of time.

[C]

Do you think that Benny is going to do, like, Is he going to do something similar?

[A]

Well, is Bad Bunny in Puerto Rico now because of Trump? Yeah, he made some sort of statement and went there.

[B]

How did you say his name?

[A]

Alicia?

[C]

I just said Benny because I had Selena Gomez and Benny both go in my head. They got married this week.

[A]

Okay, Bad Benny.

[C]

Bad Benny. But it's Bad Bunny. Jon Hamm apparently likes to go shake it at his house. When he does the house parties. He has this VIP area, and Jon Hamm has been spotted there dancing because he's a massive fan at Bad Bunny at Bad Bunny's house, where he does his house parties and his performances. So it'd be kind of funny if Jon Hamm, who's like the whitest of white dudes ever were to make a Super bowl appearance.

[A]

I just say it's the most American of all themes. Let's just keep it go. Lee Greenwood just go right on through. Let's not have kids in cages as a theme in the middle of the thing.

[C]

Should it only be American musicians?

[A]

I'm all for it, but, you know, the Stones want to play a set. Bad Bunny, hold on. Recently spent the summer in Puerto Rico multi month concert. He has also been vocal critic of Donald Trump, condemning his immigration policies and handling of hurricanes. I'll tell you what, I'll compromise Okay, I like the flyover. I don't like Bad Bunny.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

If we combine the flyover with Bad Bunny, and they just light up Bad Bunny, like, they fly over at halftime and just put a couple sidewinders into the stage, I will watch the shit out of that. And then it's a compromise. Bad Bunny's there how long?

[C]

He parachutes in with, like, an American flag. Like, make puerto rico the 51st state.

[A]

Thing he's gonna have to make. He'll do this thing where he's gonna feel compelled to make some sort of statement about immigrants or something.

[C]

And then, well, everybody last year with Kendrick Lamar's performance was like, oh, it's a debunking of, like, evil capitalism in the music industry and how they use artists like slaves. And I was like, I just thought it was Kendrick Lamar. Like, are we dumb if we're missing the messaging?

[A]

I always miss it, but I just want. I miss the cages, but I thank God I saw the doc, so I knew what the cage was. I just want a band. Like, I'm just. I'll go for a rock band.

[C]

When the best was, like, U2.

[B]

They could have done. Since it's in San Francisco or Santa Clara. They could have done Santana, Journey, Huey Lewis.

[A]

I would go for a 80s montage. That would be pretty sweet. And I'd be sweet with that. All right, you got news?

[C]

I sure do got news. We got a girl fight happening. It's between Emma Watson, of course, who played Hermione Granger in all of the Harry Potter films, and the woman herself who authored all of the Harry Potter books, and then, you know, produces and directs and makes. Still makes tons of money off of the shows and films and all that stuff. So we have a. First, this video of Emma Watson, apparently, for a while now, because, you know, there was that rift where HBO was like, no, we're gonna do the Christmas special, but we're not inviting jk. But then the. I think JK saw so much support, just generally specifically from liberal lesbian feminists in the UK and places changing their laws, that she was no longer considered the underdog. So now HBO is, like, happy to work with her again. And so Emma Watson, for a really long time had been silent on her disagreements with Rowling on the trans issue. And here she is discussing it.

[E]

I've just got to this place where it's just. If it costs me any part of my piece, it's just too expensive. And, of course, like, there's opportunities that I think, wow, like, that would be amazing. And I care deeply about my work, but I think it's just. I think I just used to completely sacrifice myself for whatever the thing was I was trying to achieve. And that could be a grade, it could be a movie, it could be promoting. I just was obsessed with excellence and doing everything. Giving my all to everything and doing it to the best of my ability.

[A]

By the way, I suffer from all this, too. I just. I try too hard. I give about 110%. I'm too good. I'm too focused on them, too.

[C]

Yeah, Too fast.

[A]

Let's just put that out there right now. I prepare too much, but all right, that's my fault. And I love too much. Sorry.

[E]

Was obsessed with excellence and doing everything. Giving my all to everything and doing.

[A]

It stuff as my business. Got it. Here we go.

[E]

And unless you have the right people around you that can hold that kind of level of commitment, you're going to get smashed up. You're just gonna get crushed. And so I think now it's just a case of me being like, okay, I know that for me to do anything, I have to have people in the room that care about me more than whatever the product is or whatever the final product is. And if that isn't the case, I cannot be there because I'm just someone who, like, gives it all. It's how I'm built. And I think understanding that makes.

[A]

All right, hold on a second. Is this a TED Talk on motivation or is she going to fucking start talking about the subject we're talking about, or is it just.

[B]

I'm about to thank her for coming in for the job interview and let her know we're going to go a different way.

[C]

You're going to give her away because you're really self absorbed.

[A]

What point are we trying to make? What point are we making with this?

[C]

Okay, so apparently.

[A]

But how did we arrive on a clip of her just saying she was the most focused person in the room? Wait, now there's another 20 seconds. I want to know.

[C]

It was in the same interview where it was in the. So that's Jay Shetty that she's on.

[A]

I just want to see the rest, by the way. Just because we're completely insane around here. But I do feel motivated, if there's any consolation. Let's see.

[E]

Of myself. And not punishing myself for that, but just knowing it needs certain kinds of conditions is how I've come to hopefully. And it's such a journey, and I'll keep doing it forever and probably every day, but accepting myself.

[C]

Are you Good at accepting yourself.

[A]

I don't think one way or the other about myself. I have no thoughts about myself. It's kind of a waste of time. I'm more concerned with how do we arrive on this fucking clip and what clip are we looking for?

[C]

I think this might be the clip that we're looking for.

[A]

All right, well, let's do that one.

[E]

There's just no world in which I could ever cancel her out or cancel that out for anything. It has to remain true. It is true. And this is where this like, holding of these. I just don't know what else to do other than hold these two seemingly incompatible things together at the same time and just hope maybe they will one day resolve or co join themselves and maybe accept that they never will, but that they can both still be true. And I can love her. I can know she loved me. I can be grateful to her. I can know the things that she said are true. And that can be this whole other thing. And my job feels like to just hold, just to hold all of it. But the bigger thing is just what she's done will never be taken away from me.

[C]

So she was talking about rallying there and how rallying did so much for her and how she hopes that she can continue to love people who disagree with her. Which is the part of the quote I think most of us could agree with, right? Where you have people in our lives that we disagree with, but the rest of the fluff of like, oh, it's like J.K. rowling is this bipolar 2 people thing. Rowling did not like that and is not over the feud, according to our friends over the Daily Wire. She then went on X to post, quote, like other people who never experienced adult life uncushioned by wealth and fame, Emma has little, so little experience of real life. She's ignorant of how ignorant she is. I'm seeing quite a bit comment about this, so I wanted to make a couple of points here. I'm not owed eternal agreement from any actor who once played a character that I created. The idea is as ludicrous as me checking with the boss I had when I was 21 for what opinions I should and should not have. I wasn't a multimillionaire at 14. I lived in poverty while writing the book that made Emma famous. Therefore, I understand from my own life experience with the trashing of women's rights in which Emma has so enthusiastically participated means to women and girls without her privileges.

[A]

Go get them, girl.

[C]

She continues, quote, the greatest irony here is that had Emma not decided in her most recent interview to declare that she loves and treasures me. A change of tack. I respect. She's adopted because she's noticed full throated condemnation of me is no longer quite as fashionable as it was. I might never have been this honest. God, even in her ex. Like she's such a great writer.

[A]

She's great.

[C]

She continues. Adults can't expect to cozy up to an activist movement that regularly calls for a friend's assassination, then assert their right to the former friend's love as though the friend was in fact their mother. Emma is rightly free to disagree with me and indeed to discuss her feelings about me in public. But I have the same right and I've finally decided to exercise it.

[A]

Very good. Now, Huel. Yeah. Like this stuff. Drinking it right now, actually. Well, you can see it on the screen. Look, we all know mornings can be a little bit chaotic. Juggling the dog, the email, the keys. They skip breakfast. A lot of people do that. They just drink coffee. I used to do that, too. Then I found out about Huell Black Edition. Seriously, grabbing this on the way out saves my whole morning. Fall is here. So school, work, everything's ramping up. And you want a meal, but you don't want a candy bar and you don't want a latte because that's not going to work well down the road. Huel spelled H U E L. Well, they get it. They're Black Edition powder. Well, it's a complete meal, so you feel full, focused and ready for the day. And get this, they just dropped the Huel greens. Ready to drink. I was just drinking one as I walked in. You see it there? First of its kind. It's all greens, but it sparkles, so it kind of goes down nice. And there's no powders, no nonsense. Just pop one and go drink it right out of the can. Made by real dietitians. It's Huel, right, Dawson?

[B]

Try Huel with 15% off for new customers today by using our code [e-mail] Adam15. Fuel your performance with Huell today.

[F]

This September, CBS hits are streaming free on Pluto TV.

[A]

I'm coming in hot.

[F]

For this month, only you can watch full seasons of the CBS shows you love, from the courtroom drama of Matlock to the heroics of Fire Country. Go back to where it all began in NCIS origins. Or watch the hilarious hauntings of ghosts. All for free. Full seasons of the CBS shows you love this month only on Pluto tv. Stream now. Pay Never.

[A]

You know, I was talking to Drew, about this the other day, wants me to bring it up. But I said to him, I said, you know, I'll tell you who I want to work with. Like, I want to be my publicist. And, you know, you think about publicity, you know, you go, well, Bad Bunny man is going to get a ton of publicity, free publicity from doing all this, but that's a windfall, okay? That's big. And then you go, yeah, but the guy who came up with the Coca Cola logo or the company that came up with the McDonald's song, you deserve a break today. But I'll tell you the person I want to work with. The person. It's like nine years ago, somebody went, look, here's what we have to do, not only in the United States, but around the world. We have to convince people. And people are like, what, to use margarine instead of butter? No, no, it's going to be a lot harder than that. To drink Pepsi instead of Coke. No, no, no, no, no. Those are easy to, like, sign up for the Marines instead of the Navy. No, no, no, no. We have to convince people that men are women and women are men, and men can become women, and women can become men. And that person, like, if you would have said that to me, I would have went, oh, good fucking luck. Good luck.

[C]

Feminists are never gonna get on board with that.

[A]

We can convince people. I think I could get people to start using this toilet paper instead of that toilet paper, or my canned soup instead of those guys. Canned soup. But convincing people, not just in the United States, we're going worldwide with this shit, And God damn it, they got literally half the country to buy into this shit, and they got the other half of the country scared to say anything about it, which is insane, because it's the most insane proclamation ever undertaken. If you want to every Madison Avenue outfit and talk to Jon Hamm and Mad Men, and he said, here's your job. What, to get him to get Ford over Chevy? No, no, no, no. We need half this country to think a man can be a woman, a woman can be a man. And, you know, stuff assigned at birth. It's not given. It's not biological. Okay, that's one half. The other half is the other half, the sane half. They have to be scared shitless to talk or they're gonna lose their job. In Hollywood, that's like, this is in Hollywood, Incorporated, everywhere. This has got to be the greatest undertaking of humanity. This is much bigger than the Hoover Dam or World War II or the Panama Canal. This is the biggest human endeavor ever to convince people. By the way, 10 years ago, you talk to anyone, you know, they go, what the fuck are you talking about? No, but that's my son, that's my daughter. Shut the fuck up and get out of my house. I don't know what you're talking about. To go from that to. Well, you know, he believes and feels like he's trapped inside. And to have the mom nodding her headlining gender. Yeah, and the mom's like going, mm, he's right. Listen to him. Are you fucking kidding me? We got half the country to do it and the other half to be so scared they wouldn't talk.

[C]

I'd go broader. Half of the world to do it.

[A]

Well, yeah.

[C]

And then the other half of the.

[A]

World, I'm leaving out the Middle east and parts of Africa.

[C]

Except men saying they're.

[A]

I said the world a few times. The Western world. The Western world. We have the person that wrote Harry Potter and is responsible for Harry Potter simply explaining a man is a man and a woman is a woman. And women and men shouldn't compete in the same sport. And she's going to be taken out of. She's gonna be erased from the history books and not. Welcome to the HBO party and everything else. And the cast gun chart, that's an amazing endeavor. If you think about, like, what are we capable of, people? Cuz I'm gonna say anything. Well, we can't get a bullet train from Fresno to Merced, but could probably.

[B]

Get Carolla on cnn.

[A]

Yes. Yeah, it could probably get me a weekend show on cnn.

[C]

Those people.

[A]

It is pretty insane what we're able to do with this project. If you think of it, if you looked at it like a product, like, you go, I got a product. What's a product do?

[C]

The product is like fear monitoring and emotional.

[A]

No, no, no. Yeah, the product. But no, the product is just. You gotta get everyone to say, a man is a woman and a woman is a man, or can be or what? That's the product. But it doesn't clean windows and it doesn't freshen air and it doesn't clean your kitty litter box. But that product is that. And we're gonna sell this product and we're gonna get everyone to buy in on it. And the ones who don't buy in on it. And you know, it's funny, cause when I told this to Drew, he goes, yeah, but you know, a lot of people didn't really buy it. They just were scared. And I said, even better. Yeah, you got people who disagree with you. So fucking scared that they're not going to say anything.

[C]

That's Germans during World War II.

[A]

That's the ultimate.

[C]

Turns out they're. They're culpable as well, though, the people who remain.

[A]

Oh, for sure. Wait a minute. Germans, World War II?

[C]

I'm just saying, like, you have, like, people. You. Bonhoeffer that wrote about this. Like, the people during World War II that were like, well, we don't really agree with Germans.

[A]

German citizens, but.

[C]

And the Nazis, they're bad. But we don't want our neighbors to run us out, so therefore, we won't hide Jews and we won't speak up and say anything.

[A]

Yeah, we just had our own Covid version of that over here.

[C]

Like, people that are now telling me.

[D]

Oh, yeah, I didn't get vaccinated.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, I know. And it's. It's. It's. It's so.

[C]

Or the women. My favorite, though, right now is some of the liberal hippie ladies. I know, they're like, oh, I never took Tylenol while pregnant. I never did anything while pregnant. The sad part, but Trump says it. They're. They're posting all over their Instagram and TikTok about how he wants to hurt women and babies, and Tylenol is totally fine.

[A]

The sad part is the people who went along with it. You're right. And if you take a look at it as a sociological experiment, like, we're gonna look back and go, we converted in a very short time. So short, we got everybody to believe something that was clinically insane and fight and threaten people and Congress people. We have people on the Supreme Court asked what a woman is going, I'm not a biologist. I can't answer like it was. So I want to be the highest.

[C]

Judicial office in the land, but I don't think I'm qualified to say that a woman has a hoo ha in different chromosomes.

[A]

They were scared. That's the beauty of it. We scared everybody into saying something that's insane because they were scared of what? Being ostracized by people who have an insane idea.

[C]

Yeah, well, losing a job, losing a school, losing. I mean, you had doctors and nurses signing onto this crap, too. People that are supposed to first do no harm.

[A]

I know. And now it's all going to come undone. It already is.

[C]

And kudos to JK for saying this. Originally, she had said back in 2024 that she had no plans to forgive Watson or the other two Harry Potter stars who publicly supported transgender rights. She said, quote, celebs who cozied up to a movement intent on eroding women's hard won rights and who use their platforms to cheer on the transitioning of minors can save their apologies for traumat detransitioners and the vulnerable women relying on single sex spaces.

[A]

God love her.

[C]

Real feminist right there.

[A]

I agree.

[C]

Real feminist.

[A]

And there's a clip actually back to Drew. He brought it in. I was looking at him with him today. The clip Drew brought in Andrew, which is sort of what I was saying is it's in this clip. But. But the whole movement, it's a grievance movement. It's not like it's, we want this, we want to be treated, we want gay marriage. Then you go, okay, fine, get married. And they go, oh, well, we're moving on to more grievance. It's all fucking grievance. It's all grievance. The black thing is grievance. All the race stuff, all the gender stuff, it's just grievance. And you'll see in this clip, this was someone who transitioned but regrets it. And she'll explain it. He'll explain it, they'll explain it. Someone will explain it. Here we go.

[C]

That caused those symptoms. And when you don't appropriately diagnose people, you lead them into a life of ruin. All of these interventions are permanent. They're irreversible. And they lied to me. I want people to know that they're lying to people. They're not diagnosing autogynophiles as autogynephiles. I have friends who met a glycogen all the way in our self admitted heps who were never diagnosed with the reason they feel this way. They were just transitioned. Who do you blame for this sort of fast tracking of medicalizing children? I think after gay marriage was one, there was an empty hole in gay politics. We had gotten everything we wanted. And I think trans jumped into all of the orgs that were associated with the gay community and they lobbied to make gender identity protected.

[A]

All right, you stop right there. Because I always just went, hold on. I thought it was the lesbian and gay community. When did the trans. When did trans take everything over?

[C]

So true.

[A]

Said a fucking Starbucks in Malibu yesterday. And they had a trans flag hanging. Well, actually my girlfriend went in and then came back and she went, ugh, a trans flag hanging. And then I said, what kind of flag was it before it became a trans flag? And she goes, what? And I said, what kind of flag? And she went, it's a trans flag. And I Went, all right, let's make it a joke. But anyway, forget it.

[C]

Now, sometimes the people we want to laugh the most just don't.

[A]

It was a beach town. Yeah. Come on, I'm a comedian.

[C]

You gotta pay me to do this, woman.

[A]

All right, so what they did is they got everything they wanted, and then the trans people showed up, went, we'll take it from here.

[C]

And actually undermined everything that members of the gay community did for years.

[A]

And it's all there. It's all there as a pushback because they hate their dads and we become their dads. That's all that's going on. Here's what it is. It's basically like you saying. It's like you saying to your stepdad, your stepdad goes, you, curfew is 10pm young lady. And then you go, make it midnight. You let me out till midnight, and I'll never complain about anything again. And then they go, okay, midnight. And you go, okay, so I can just come back at midnight? Yeah. Oh, why wouldn't you buy me a six pack of beer? What? No, I'm not gonna buy you a six pack of beer. You buy me a six pack of beer, old man. I hate your guts. And at some point he goes, fine, I'll get you a six pack and you can come back at midnight, okay?

[C]

Now give me a fake id.

[A]

I did heroin. I want. No, I don't need a fake id. You got. You buy my beer. I want a fake id, and I want the heroin syringe. And you go, absolutely not. That is crazy. I'm not gonna do it. Then you go, oh, really? Fuck you. I hate you. And they go, fine, here's your heroin, here's your rig, your six pack, fake id. Don't come back. And they go, okay, I got everything I want. Yeah, and I want to borrow your car. No, I'm not. Oh, fuck you then. And it's like, okay, at what point do you just want grievance? You just want grievance? Actually, the Drag Queen Story Hour, that's just grievance. That drag queen has nothing in it for him, nothing in it for the kids, nothing in it for anybody. It's all grievance. And they hate their dads and nobody understands this. And they go, just give them the thing and then they'll stop. They won't stop because they're in the grievance business.

[C]

And I think the hate the dad thing is so true. I think that so many people, whether they're heterosexual, homosexual, in the trans movement, whatever, that have signed on to this, like, to pretend that they're a victim and like, to victimize their childhood and the ways that they weren't accepted and loved. And so therefore, when they see a kid that's like, I think I might be a man or I might be a boy, they're like, oh, my God, let me help you. The intent might be generous, but the actual result is really horrifically and irreversibly dangerous to that child that they see themselves in. And they're trying to, like, fix this person that needs to be accepted and loved. And it's really twisted.

[A]

And also. And they can be talked in. I mean, obviously, you know, Bill Maher says, how come none of this is happening in Iowa or Wyoming? Why is it all in the class?

[C]

Well, maybe those kids don't have phones and TikTok.

[A]

But it's like when you hear what's her name from Sex and the City going, my daughter's transition. And my nieces have. Everyone I know is transition. It's like, okay, bitch, something's going on. Unless you got a really bad water table, but you drink bottled water. What do you think of this? I'm gonna bring this up to you, Dawson. Cause you're not scared? Alicia's gonna be scared.

[C]

Oh, God.

[A]

But it sounds like it's racial, but it's not.

[C]

Mm.

[A]

15, 16 year olds. A lot of girls, especially. Especially being in West Coast, east coast, you know, Manhattan, Los Angeles, they just get in a clique and they just. Whatever.

[C]

I mean. Yeah. This is what Abigail Shrier talked about. Whether it's anorexia or transitioning or lesbian, like, little cliques. Yeah.

[A]

How many people. How many people in this time period? And if you told them, like, it's that 16 year old girl and. Or boy out here, that same kind of group, you could transition into being a black person. What percentage of them would go for it? I think a lot where I'm from, a lot from out here.

[C]

Well, yes.

[A]

More than sex. They would go for it.

[C]

They transition to a different ethnicity.

[A]

Yeah, they would. Especially white.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Young white man.

[A]

Young white would go to black. Yes.

[C]

And then they'd be like, sign me up, I'll be Joy Reid as my.

[A]

Shave my head. I'll beat Joey Reid. And as a dad, I would go, honey, you're 15. Let's not do this.

[C]

Let's not Rachel Dolezal it up.

[A]

Yes. I think you'll be 40 and might be unhappy that you did this. So I'm just saying, at that age, a lot of people Would do a lot of stuff anyway. We're nuts. It's gonna go down in history. Whatever happens to Fauci and Covid in history, it'll be about the same.

[C]

I actually hope that there's more ramifications for this.

[A]

Oh, I mean, ramifications, but history's not gonna be kind to the assholes that were doing the surgery. And then plus, I don't know. You ever see that clip of the woman from Vanderbilt talking about how much money there is in top surgeries?

[C]

Trying to push people in that direction? Like, don't just stop at giving them hormone blockers. Let's make sure that they schedule the surgeries.

[A]

Yeah. And she's like, it's 40,000 just for top surgery. It's like, okay. It's business, you ghouls.

[C]

You mean giving a child without cancer double mastectomy?

[A]

At a certain point, you become a ghoul is what I'm saying. You're slaughtering kids. All right, yeah, let's listen to her. Whatever this is. By the way, this is not a junior college outside of Tijuana.

[C]

Vandy.

[A]

This is Vandy.

[C]

Starting in January 1st of 2017, according to the Affordable care act insurance cover carriers are mandated to cover medical expenses.

[A]

Oh, good. Oh, sure.

[C]

Affordable care, UMC financial folks, in August of 20. I'm sorry, October of 2016.

[A]

Sorry.

[C]

A couple years ago.

[A]

Put down some costs of how much.

[C]

Money we think each patient would bring in. And this is only including top surgery. This isn't including any bottom surgery.

[A]

And it's a lot of money.

[C]

These surgeries make a lot of money. So female to male chest reconstruction can bring in $40,000. A patient just on routine hormone treatment, who I'm only seeing a few times a year, can bring in several thousand dollars. That requires a lot of visits and labs. It actually makes money for the hospital.

[A]

All right, so the point is, I.

[C]

Don'T like to use the B word. I would apply to that woman. Like, what a horrific bitch. Like, how many children's lives did she ruin because she could, quote, unquote, bring in several thousands of dollars. She's probably making half a million dollars a year being some director of something and should have her medical license removed.

[A]

The bigger part of this time that I find interesting, whether it's this or Covid, is the people who said something about this shit were the ones that were being destroyed.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

While the left cheered.

[C]

We were the anti science. You know what they're doing now, though? This really pisses me off. Npr, cnn, everybody. Now they're not just saying, like, science, they're saying good science.

[A]

Oh, really?

[C]

So there are some studies out there that show that, yes, maybe Tylenol during pregnancy ain't great for the baby in utero, or as the left would call it, a blob of cells. But then there are other studies that show here in the. Some of them are European, some are from the United States saying, no, it's no big deal. It's totally fine. Right. So this is where you have. Now, Trump and. And RFK Jr have said stuff about it. Literally every single news report on the Tylenol thing and the COVID vaccine thing for children and all these other things. Measles, they're big on is good science. So NPR and CNN are only talking about good scientists. And I'm like, well, then how do you determine who the good scientist is? Is it the people that were transitioning children?

[A]

Well, all the good scientists turn out to be wrong during COVID and all the bad scientists with the misinformation turn out to be right. Jay Bhattacharya and the whole group.

[C]

Yep.

[A]

All right, one more story if you got it.

[C]

So this is a really sweet, bittersweet story. I did not know this about Tim Allen. Great guy. The home improvement star, said that Erica Kirk's emotional eulogy at Charlie's memorial service, where she apologized or where she forgave his assassin and spoke deeply about her faith, has now inspired him to forgive his father's killer. His father was killed by a drunk driver when he was just 11 years old. Tim said, quote, when Erica Kirk spoke the words on the man who killed her husband, that man, that young man, I forgive him. That moment deeply affected me. He wrote on X on Thursday, I have struggled for over 60 years to forgive the man who killed my dad. And I will say those words now as I type. I forgive the man who killed my father. Peace be with you all.

[A]

Wow. Well, good. Good for Timmy.

[C]

That's a lot.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And I, God, I pray that for Charlie's kid that they can grow up and forgive the man that killed their dad.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Are you doing more security now?

[A]

Yes.

[C]

It's scary, isn't it? Just a little bit.

[A]

Yeah. I was just talking to Dr. Drew who was traveling around with Gutfeld.

[C]

He has it, too.

[A]

And Gutfeld's got. They've got, like, three guys assigned to him when he travels around and stuff like that.

[C]

I mean, it's sad that, you know, I do campus speeches. I've always done campus speeches the last, like, seven plus years. And, like, I always it's like I sometimes request security at events, not for me, but for the students in the audience, you know, for like, the little old Chamber of Commerce and Republican Party ladies that come out and stuff like that. And it's. I was just at a live action, a pro life event over the weekend. There's security everywhere. And I think it's less for, like, the A listers that are there and as much for the audience that's there as well now. Yeah, like, when you go do stand up now, you need security for you, but also the crowd of people that the left deems dangerous or violent because of your words. Like, it's ridiculous.

[A]

You know, I was thinking about Tim Allen's dad being killed by drunk driver. And in the pantheon of Joe Biden and why we should hate him more, even though we have enough to hate him, there's one that gets forgotten about a lot, which makes you a really bad person, which is his wife was killed by a truck driver. His son, another son.

[C]

It was like his two young sons, right? Wasn't it?

[A]

They survived. I think the wife died or maybe one died or the.

[C]

Whatever tragedy.

[A]

Okay. The guy driving the truck was not at fault.

[C]

Yep.

[A]

His wife was at fault. Every time Joe would tell the story, he would say the guy drank his lunch, meaning he was driving a semi.

[C]

Truck, and blame the guy.

[A]

And blame the guy, which is a despicable thing to do for a guy who was driving and somebody caused an accident and now they're dead. And I'm sure he had to live with that guilt. And his daughter asked Joe Biden to please stop lying about it was killing his dad. And Joe Biden kept saying it. It that makes him a very bad guy. Like, so makes him a horrible, horrible guy. And it's also unnecessary. I know you're trying to collect points wherever you go. You know, the fact that you were.

[C]

A young widower is enough, like, sorrow points. Right. It doesn't matter who was responsible for the car accident. It's a horrible tragedy.

[A]

You get all your tragedy points without destroying another family's lives being immoral. That's exactly right. All right, we'll take a break. Dustin Ybarra's out there. We're gonna talk Chewie. Talk comedy with him. Alicia Krause, where do we go for you?

[C]

Washington examiner and my instagram page and yaff.org if you want to see where I'm speaking on campuses this fall.

[A]

And we'll take a quick break. Back with dustin right after BetterHelp. Yeah. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp Love these guys. October 10th is World Mental Health Day. This year BetterHelp wants to say a big thanks to all the therapists, over 5 million people who've been helped by BetterHelp therapists worldwide. This isn't just in this country. These therapists show up, listen and help people take steps forward. Therapy moments like the right question or a safe spot to let it all out that can be life changing. If something's keeping you up at night, talking to someone can really help. BetterHelp makes it easy to connect with a licensed therapist online. This World Mental Health Day celebrate the therapists who help millions get better. It's BetterHelp, right Dawson?

[B]

Visit BetterHelp.com Carolla today to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp.

[A]

H E L P.com Corolla Holmes.com oh, love these guys. Well, you guys know Homes.com. some might say that Homes.com is the best home shopping site. It may be Homes.com's super comprehensive and transparent agent directory. Or Maybe it's at. Homes.com is the only site that always directly connects you with the listing agent who knows the home the best. Or perhaps just Maybe it's because homes.com has the most in depth neighborhood content of any shopping site that's extensively researched to highlight the personality of each neighborhood. Homes.com goes above and beyond to bring home shoppers the in depth info they need to find the right home. And right now, homes.com homes.com we've done your homework.

[B]

It's time to check Adam's voicemail.

[A]

Adam, you ruined the movie Taxi Driver for me. Robert De Niro sends the young prostitute back to her home with her family. If I learn anything from Loveline, the last place that girl needs to be is with her family.

[B]

You can leave us a message at 888-634-1744 for.

[A]

It's true. She got molested. That's why she's on the streets. Dustin knows all about it.

[D]

I didn't even see that. Is that a spoiler alert? Ah, she got molested.

[A]

Dustin Yabara. Well, I did the math in studio live shows. Great stand up comedian. And you can check him out on his tick tock as well, which is written down here, but I can't read it. So what's the tick tock called?

[D]

Dustin Ibarra.

[A]

Oh, metal detector.

[D]

Yeah, it's just Dustin and Bar, but I stream metal detecting on there.

[A]

You were saying off the air you've been finding a lot of different stuff weird Things, man.

[D]

A lot of parmesan cheese packets, a lot of crushed red pepper, and a lot of. I found a COVID test the other day.

[A]

Are people okay when you buy pizza? They're buying pizza, right?

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

And when you get pizza, you get crushed red pepper, and then you get parmesan. Now they talk about bringing sand to the beach, giving a little packet of cheese to spread on top of a thing that's covered with melted cheese. Feels like we're gilding the cheese, Lily, a little bit. It's like, I dig parmesan cheese, and if you got a big plate of pasta, I dig putting the Parmesan on there. But why Parmesan on the pizza? Because the pizza's already covered with cheese.

[D]

I have no idea. I think it's a poor people thing because you know how, like, poor communities, they like, like, spicy, like, Flamin hot Cheetos and Takis and stuff. I think just more of anything. Like, I'm into, like, I'll, like. I'll put a lot of parmesan cheese and crashed red peppers because it's free. That's what I think. I think I'm like, oh, this is free. I'm not gonna waste it. You know, extra ranch.

[A]

I'm one of the few people who does this. But garlic powder, not salt. But garlic powder is really good on a pizza, dude.

[D]

It's good. And also that. What is that stuff? The oregano they'll have. You know how they have the three, like, things. You can shake on it. I'll put all that on there.

[A]

So you've been finding packets?

[D]

I've been. Yes. I'll be able to retire.

[A]

What beach you on?

[D]

I go to Manhattan beach and Hermosa Beach. You got to go to the rich beaches. Poor people, they don't lose things like rich people. Poor people lose, like, custody of their kids and, like, that. Rich people lose, like, rings and, like, jewelry.

[A]

Yeah. They lose their right for bail or custody hearing or something like that, but they don't lose. And you know, it's funny because it's so funny. The Mexicans. What are you, half Mexican?

[D]

I'm half Mexican. Yeah.

[A]

Were I on PCH in Malibu. Everyone doing all the work is Mexican. It's 100%. All the rebuilds.

[D]

I can see that.

[A]

All the. Everyone driving, all the tractors, every piece of equipment, everyone holding the shovel. It's only Mexicans working.

[D]

I don't think I've ever seen a white construction worker maybe on TV or something, but yeah.

[A]

And so there's Mexicans doing All the work. And then the other Mexicans are surf fishing. They're fishing. And then the white guys are surfing. But there's no Mexican surfing and there's no white guy fishing and there's no white guy swinging a shovel up on pch. It's exclusive white dude surfing. Do you see dudes surfing? Like, do you see that? You ever go down like PCH and you just see that dude and like you're hustling to get to work or to get to the airport or to do something and it's like 9:15 in the morning and this guy's just, bro, he's just waxing down that board and he looks like he's 50.

[D]

I see him all the time.

[A]

And you're like, what is your schedule? What goes on? How did you craft this life?

[D]

In my mind, I'm just like, oh, he's probably like a tech guy or something. I'll have a little story. Like he had a company, then sold it. I just want to go surf for the rest of my life. And now he's getting to do what.

[A]

He does is it. And I do that. And then there's another part where I go, maybe it's just a fucking fireman who retired two years ago and fucking lives within his means and he just likes surfing. And then I'm like, and who's the smart one? Because I'm hustling to the Burbank airport right now. And you're just fucking looking for your next taste as well.

[D]

He's just chilling, man.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. The landlocked version of that is the person that hunkered down at the Starbucks at noon, just, oh my God, not going anywhere. Not a Wednesday noon, no place to go.

[D]

Got the dudes working at Starbucks, cuz you'll see the guys working too. They have the laptop. I saw a dude with a double screen setup, man, and he, a headset on, he had a whole table and that was like his office. And I'm like, who are you conducting business with, bro?

[A]

Yeah, they're, they're plugging in their power. The power cord, you know, with a breaker box on it and stuff. Exactly.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

We are getting a little entitled at Starbucks.

[D]

You can do whatever. I, I went in there because I do some writing and I was like, I was like, you know what? I usually go to my garage, but it was hot in there. I'm like, I'm just gonna go to Starbucks and I go there all the time. So I'm like, I didn't feel like a leech because I always go to Starbucks, but I didn't buy anything this time. So I was just kind of waiting. I'm like, is someone gonna come up to me? Because I didn't want another coffee because I just had one. So I was like, did you.

[A]

So have you found anything of value?

[D]

Yes, dude. I found some cool stuff. I found a silver Tiffany's necklace. I find a bunch of rings. I find. I found this dude's Grandpa's World War II dog tag that he lost while he was playing volleyball. And it was awesome because everyone was, like, watching me. And, dude, it was like a crowd of people, really. In my mind, I'm like, oh, I gotta. I gotta find this, or else I'm.

[A]

Gonna look like, oh, because you were dispatched.

[D]

But I was. Well, I was just minding my business. Metal detecting. This guy was like, hey, dude, do you think you can help me find my. And I'm like, oh, okay. And I'm doing it on my live, too, on my stream. And I'm like, dude, oh, my God. And I. I. It took forever, but then I got.

[A]

A beep, beep, beep.

[D]

And I'm like, oh, God, please let this be it.

[A]

Grandpa's tags.

[D]

Pulled it up. Everyone was, oh, yeah. People were coming up and taking pictures. I'm like, ah. What? I'm just some guy, man.

[A]

I had this weird flashback to a million years ago. I was like, in high school, I was probably 17 or something, and I borrowed my dad's car, and I took all us dudes to the beach to go body surfing or something. And at some point, we're getting ready to leave, and the keys were gone. Like, the keys were in the sand, and. And, like, in the sand. And I was like, no spare key. No spare key at home. No cell phone, no Uber, no credit cards.

[D]

You're done. Things can go in so quick.

[A]

I know. And it was also, like. It was back in the day, like, for me, no credit cards, no cell phone, no cash, no nothing. Like. Like, I'd got my friend. I got my motorcycle towed in Century City once. I just started walking home, and I told that to Drew, and he's like, you lived in North Hollywood. I'm like, what are my fucking choices? I don't have any money. I don't have a cell phone. I don't have a credit card. So I'm just gonna start walking downward. That's a long ways to my dad's house in North Hollywood. Yeah, but if he said, you gotta walk to Oregon, I would just start walking that direction. But I was hitchhiking as I was walking, and a gay guy picked me up.

[D]

Oh, nice.

[A]

Okay, cool. I got picked up by a couple of gay dudes. And then I ran into some chick named Stacy from high school, picked me up.

[D]

I made it home, but sounds like a movie. That sounds like an independent movie or something.

[A]

I. We were stuck out like Zuma. There's no keys. And I was like, I have no good, by the way. Again. Stuff's an inconvenience now. Yeah, like, stuff. Now you go, we'll call an Uber and Uber will take us back. And then I got a spare key in the. But this is no Uber. No phone, no credit cards, no money.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

This is like, start walking home a.

[D]

Little bit of that.

[A]

And I had a fin because we were body surfing with fins and everyone. Oh, yeah, you use fins when you surf. Body surf, you gotta use it. And I, like, took everyone. My friends were like, fuck this. And they started hitchhiking stuff. And I just took this fin and I drew a circle, like, 30ft around with the fin in the ground, in the sand. I made a big crop circle, like 30ft around. And I said, goddamn keys are inside of this somewhere.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Now fucking start on the outside and we'll just keep going. But it's gotta be in here. And eventually found.

[D]

That's right. In metal detecting, they call that gridding.

[A]

Gritty.

[D]

Gritty.

[A]

I was gritting.

[D]

I learned all these. These little things like that, like. Because I know, because that happened to me, like, a couple weeks ago. This lady was like. She saw me. She's like, I lost my keys. Can you help find her? Yeah. But she didn't know where they were. Like, it was like. She's like, well, they could be anywhere from here to, like, Culver City. I'm like, oh, we gotta.

[A]

What's protocol? Tip. Do you get a tip?

[D]

I don't.

[A]

You know.

[D]

You know, sometimes people will be like, give me a tip or something. But I never do that. I'm always just like. Because what I do is I'll chop up the video and I'll put online. I'm like, ah, that'll look cool.

[A]

Did we figure out last time you were here who was a bigger loser? Metal detector guy at the beach or recumbent bike guy on the road?

[D]

I think the recumbent bike guy, because the metal detecting guy can offer his services. Recumbent bike guy can't be like, he can't do it. I forgot about that. That's right. We were talking about putting it on a dwarf and like that's how you see him. Crowd. That little flag that comes up.

[A]

It's, it's, it's. They're both lone losers. But who is the bigger lone loser? You say recumbent bike guy. I'm not going to argue with you.

[D]

You think it's a metal detector guy. No, I, I don't even think that because that's like you could, you could get stuff. Like you get, like you can help people.

[A]

It's like. Let me be helpful, okay?

[D]

Am I losing?

[A]

No, no, let me tell you, you will be. But for now you're okay. Because I've just decided this.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

Old metal detector guy, fine. Hobby, retired veteran, whatever, doing his thing. I'll accept 80 year old guy with metal detector beach guy. I will accept young guy, kind of cool and ironic. Like ironic for a while. Like once in a while some chick will pull up. Some like 23 year old chick will pull up in a ford Falcon from 1964 or something. You go, that's kind of cool. Kind of cool. Like retro. It's different. Yeah. It's against type. Yeah. But there's a middle spot that you're entering. Okay, see you're.

[D]

So there's a timeline on this where it's like, if I keep on, I'm gonna be branded as. That's a metal detector guy.

[A]

Middle aged metal detector guy's sad.

[D]

That's tough.

[A]

Old metal detector guy's fine. Just a hobby. An old guy, like, go play bocce ball at the park. You know what I mean? Young is ironic and kind of against the grain. Right. But middle age detector guy, which you're heading toward.

[D]

I'm almost there.

[A]

You're almost there.

[D]

I think I'm gonna get a recumbent bike and split my time between the two.

[A]

That's what I'm saying.

[D]

So then it'll always be ironic.

[A]

Play it safe. All right. You know what I saw today that I miss? And I realized because it's a pretty big part of my childhood and I don't see it anymore, but I'm curious if other people are seeing it. Skywriting sky. Oh, remember skywriting?

[D]

It was like a thing.

[A]

You'd go out and you'd go, oh, whoa. First off, you try. So there's different phases. There was, you got there a little late and the heart kind of blew out. You couldn't barely read the tea from Tammy, you know, and you're like, oh, man, that probably looked cherry an hour ago. Then there was mid sky riding where the guy's actually doing it you're like, oh, I'm not going anywhere.

[D]

Figure it out. Like, it's like a game show or something. I want to buy a Val heart someone. I circle someone.

[F]

What is this?

[A]

Right?

[D]

I love that, dude. See that? And what's great about it too is you don't know who's doing it. So if you're with a girl, you can be like, hey, I got that for you. Oh, you see that? See that heart in the sky?

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Is that like the same as. Is there a conspiracy? Like, what is it where they put the airplanes, Drops, contrails, commtrails. Yeah, I think they should do that, but just make little like hearts and shit and smiley faces. Then we'd be like, oh, that's not a chemtrail. That's a friggin cool little emoji.

[A]

Well, there's chemtrails and then there's contrails. But contrails were what used to come out of back of a jet. I don't know if they call them chemtrails.

[D]

I don't know. The things that make our boners go away, turn into women.

[A]

Sky riding was fairly ubiquitous. Like when I was young, any clear weekend day, you could look out, there'd be something floating around up there. It was a lot. And I don't see it anymore.

[D]

I haven't seen it in. Last time I saw it was in Hollywood probably like four years ago.

[A]

Yeah. So it's gone the way the dodo. But the question is sort of why? Like, it's good. It got replaced by the banner plane with the Takati flag on it where they just drag it up and down the beach.

[D]

That's like, I agree. Yeah. Do the sky. What happened to the skywriting pilot? Because there were probably just a few people that were trained like that, right? Yeah, it's probably like. But anyone can. Like, if I knew how to fly, I could drag something behind me. But to actually like put the. That's an art right there.

[A]

Yeah. And. And whoever figured it out, they probably made it illegal in Los Angeles or something because whatever exhaust is.

[D]

Yeah. It probably like run into. Into some endangered species. It chokes him or some shit.

[A]

And I wonder, you must have to pay these guys in full up front.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Because there'd be a lot of haggling. Like, you know, first off, I didn't even know that was a heart. It looked more like a liver because of the way you drew it out there.

[D]

Yeah. And they probably charge you per letter or something. So if you want to say Happy Valentine's Day. You just got to put like, happy vd. And then everyone's like, what? A happy vd? Well, no, I.

[A]

Wrong message. What is it? Can you. Andrew, can you hire a skyrider in la? And then how come they don't do it for, like, movies or Valentine's Day or whatever? And they must have to. They must be like, the dmv. Like, no, you can't just put the N word on your license plate and drive around. You can't do. They go, you can't do that.

[D]

Although that would be the funniest thing to see in the sky.

[A]

Which is. But, like, you talk to the guy and you're like, look, I want to. I want to do kill the jizz. And it's like, yeah, we just. We have a certain things. We can't.

[D]

We can't do it. But we can spell it. J, O, O, S. Right. Okay.

[A]

Prices for the single aircraft skywriting are about 3500 bucks for normal message normal. 2500 for heart service in our local area of service.

[D]

You could afford that?

[A]

Yeah, I could get a heart up there. Yeah.

[D]

Put Adam Carolly show up there and then like. Yeah. Write off on your taxes or something. Isn't that how business works?

[A]

That's how business works, yeah. And I guess. I mean, I guess if it's windy, it's not good. No, there's a lot of regulations. I'm reading there's a lot of regulations in Los Angeles. Well. Well, first off, it's not like you could fly over Dodger Stadium during a home game because you'd be taken out by missile. Right. Like, they would look at you as a terrorist. Right?

[D]

I guess so.

[A]

Although this is a good movie idea. Sky Rider.

[D]

Sky Rider.

[A]

The Rock is a guy. Okay. He was a Blue Angel. He was a highly decorated Blue Angel.

[D]

But a Blue Angel. Did they do like. Blue Angels didn't bomb people, right?

[A]

No. They were the stunt flying team for the Navy, Right? Yeah. So he was a Blue angel. And there was, like, controversy. Like, he had his wingman got too close to him. So he did an experimental acrobatic move to save the guy, and it worked. But he got drummed out of the Blue Angels. And now they do that thing. They do it in all those good movies. The guy was the best, riding high. And next thing you know, they cut to and he's working at this crappy sky riding place.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

And they're out in Simi Valley. And he's like, get back in the plane. He's shaking his head, you know, That's a biplane. Goes almost 100 miles an hour. You think it handles like a flu. F16s, bitches. All right, what do we got here? You know? And he's out. That's the story, right? That's the base. That's the base. And then there's his daughter. Oh, there's always a daughter that lost the daughter during the divorce. And she's like, think he's a loser. And it was great. And there's pictures, like, he comes home at night after the skywriting thing, cracks a beer. And he looks at the picture of him in the full uniform when the daughter was nine in front of the F18, you know, and she's smiling and he's smiling, and you just see him look at it.

[D]

Yeah. Now she hates him.

[A]

Now it's another draw off his beer, you know?

[D]

Definitely. Mixed race, child.

[A]

Mixed race.

[D]

They'll be like, love the mixed race. Exactly. So you gotta. And then whatever the climax is, this final thing where it's like, you can't do that. You can't write.

[A]

We're not there yet.

[D]

I got a good one for when it happens. Okay, so he's at the place. He's looking at his daughter. He's a big drunk.

[A]

Well, he's not a big drunk. Well, he's the rock.

[D]

Snort's a little meth.

[A]

Okay. But he does a freeze.

[D]

Okay, okay.

[A]

A little booger sugar.

[D]

A little bit.

[A]

No, no, no. He's the good guy, but he's got kind of railroaded. The Navy threw him out of the Blue Angels. His daughter's like, 18 now, and, like, he's looking at the picture, taking another draw off his beer. He's got a crappy apartment by the place. He's living upstairs at the skywriting place. Like it's a shitty airport run by an old lady who cusses a lot.

[D]

Oh, that's the greatest thing.

[A]

She's funny.

[D]

Funny.

[A]

Funny.

[D]

She's a pistol.

[A]

Yeah. Like, real Ruth Gordon type, you know, she swears all the time, and then they'll do a thing. Like, she'll see him. Cause it's the Rock, you know what I mean? Like, she'll see him getting out of the plane and. And some part. He pulls his overalls, his flight suit down and he's shirtless, you know? And she looks at her, goes, I have a little. I have a little. Some of that. You know, it's like, that's. That's the.

[D]

Roll the eyes. Like. Ah, Ruth, come on.

[A]

Right? Yeah. Ruth. Ruth. Yeah. Okay.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

It's Good. So he's living upstairs, you know.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

In the flight. You know, at flight school or whatever.

[D]

And it's like. It's just him there. It's him, her, and then maybe like a mechanic guy. Like a kind of like comic relief type guy. Maybe a dust in a bar part. I could go like two inches.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

And he smokes weed. Oh, man.

[A]

What?

[D]

You were in the Blue Angel? Nah. Dude, are you serious?

[A]

Right, right.

[D]

I don't want to talk about it, you know?

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

What? Dude, this is you, man.

[A]

Yeah. So he's up there, he's taking a draw off his beer. He's looking at his daughter, and he calls her, you know, and of course she picks up and the music's real loud and she's like, dad, I can't talk now. You know, I'm going about my friend's house or whatever. And they're like, hey, listen, I was hoping I could see you this weekend. No, I'm going to be with mom this weekend. I'll talk to you later. And she hangs out up. And that scene, you know, that's act one.

[D]

That's tough.

[A]

Yeah, right.

[D]

But then what's the catalyst that it's.

[A]

Like, hey, well, this is. This is. This is when the game seven of the World Series is going to be at Dodger Stadium.

[D]

Oh, okay.

[A]

And they're. And the terrorists are bringing in drones. That's the story that's over here. That's that story, you know? Now the B story is he finds love.

[D]

Love. Yeah. But who does he find? Look, because I'm picturing if he's this, like, down. She's got to be like a business lady or some kind of like. Some, like, she's better than, like, you know, she's like, up. Up in some kind of like, high ranks. Or she could be the person in the, like, us, the FBI, the task force or something who recruits him, you know?

[A]

No, no, she's not. No, she's not recruiting him. He.

[D]

So she's just like some chick he's gotta find.

[A]

He's gotta find love.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

And. Ah. Aha. Oh, I got it. Okay. She comes in, and he's getting in his plane, right?

[D]

Okay.

[A]

And he's about to fire it up. And he's looking down on his note because, like, what are we. What message am I writing out there? And it's a Valentine's one. It's gonna be horror with Stan. I love you. And he's just going, all right, all right, I got it. And he's starting to throttle up. And a beautiful woman comes pulling up in a nice car. And she's driving next to the plane while the plane is taxing. No, no, no, stop, stop. And he's like, what?

[D]

What?

[A]

And she's. He's starting to take off, like, down the Runway. And she's speeding next to him and the car honk. And the horn, flashing the lights, waving, waving, wave. Eventually he throttles off, stops, gets out of the plane. Yeah, can I help you? That's my message. That's my Valentine's message. Yeah, yeah. Stan. I love Stan. Cheated on me last night. Stan cheated. I want nothing to do with that, man. Stan, she's beautiful.

[D]

And a little punch at the end of the scene is. He's like. Like, I'm keeping the deposit.

[A]

Right, Right. So there's, you know, they're having. Now they're talk now. Oh, cut to, cut to. They're in, sitting upstairs at his place, having that beer. You know what I mean? And she's going, I should have never trusted him. I'm such a romantic guy. I'm such a romantic. I, blah, blah, blah. Was gonna put this up in the sky above his work. And I found out. Out this morning it was cheating on me. And he. She had to rush there to stop it.

[D]

She wouldn't. Yeah.

[A]

All right.

[D]

Okay. So she's up in the room, they're drinking a beer. Yeah. When does the government stuff come? Because he's obvious. He's got to get recruited, right? Or something. Or is that just like a very in thing where it's like he sees. He flips on the TV and like a bomb has happened at Dodger Stadium. Drones are in the sky.

[A]

And so they. So he finds budding love with her.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Budding love.

[A]

It's hot, you know, because obviously she's single.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

She's found out.

[D]

I want one of those hot roadhouse scenes, too, you know, where everyone's kind of.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Butt. You know, like he's looking out and then you just see his butt. But she's all like, well, no, he.

[A]

Doesn'T bang her that day. No, no, no, no.

[D]

I guess that wouldn't be romantic.

[A]

But there's like, she, you know, she goes, it's my fault for trusting a man in the first place. And then he goes, maybe you never met the right man. Takes a draw off his beer.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

And she sees the picture of him in the blue angel thing, and you can tell she's impressed. Like, it's that thing. Yes.

[D]

She picks up the phone.

[A]

We have to look around. We have the look around thing where he goes, you want another Dos Equis? And she goes, ah, after the day I've had. And he gets up to walk into the kitchen and you show her look around. Purple Heart, you know, Iron Flying Cross, you know, Medal of Valor, you know, pictures of like, and with his old.

[D]

Buddies in an M16, you know, like in Kuwait. They're in front of Saddam Hussein's house.

[A]

He flies for the Navy, so let's not. Don't get our branches too confusing, okay?

[D]

So he's this badass five. So she's like.

[A]

She sees the accommodation. It. She sees pictures of like, Ronald Reagan putting a. A medal around his neck and stuff. And she's intrigued, you know what I mean? Because she's like, what the hell?

[D]

He comes back. He comes back and she's like, was this you? And he doesn't want to talk about it.

[A]

You know, she goes, was this you?

[D]

And then he goes, that was a long time ago.

[A]

Let me do the dialogue here.

[D]

Okay, wait.

[A]

She says, is this you? And he goes, it was. Was. Draw the beer. But she's intrigued.

[D]

It was. I love.

[A]

She's intrigued. Yeah, intrigued.

[D]

But then. Okay, but then she's got to go though, cuz obviously right here is where they would be like, you know, getting down. But she's got it. Her phone needs to go off or something.

[A]

Yeah, right.

[D]

I got to go pick up my.

[A]

Well, the clients in town. She's a. She's a heavy hitter.

[D]

Yeah. So she's taking out. Well, I see you again. Towards the sky or some shit like that.

[A]

Yeah, looked up. Right. So, okay, so, yeah, and then she leaves. And then later on, the manager of the place, like, the chick comes in and goes, oh, she had one more message she wanted you to send and it's her phone number, like on a piece of paper. And he smiles a little. And then, and then the Ruth Gordon chick, the old horny chick, like, slaps in the ass. I hope you get some. It's like we go out on a laugh, you know what I mean?

[D]

But then she could even say, can I watch? And then he's like, whoa, what kind of character is this? You know?

[A]

Yeah, we'll.

[D]

We'll. We'll.

[A]

We'll get whatever's on the script and then we'll have fun with it and then we'll see what happens.

[D]

Now we need to get to. Now we.

[A]

Now we cut. We cut from that to the terrorists, okay? The terrorists are coming.

[D]

Very terror. And I want him to look like, real like what you would like naked gun terrorists. You know what I'm saying?

[A]

Yeah. Over the top, swarthy.

[D]

Yeah. The Mass.

[A]

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[F]

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[A]

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[F]

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[A]

But again. And what I like to call Jonny Quest villain. If you watch Jonny Quest, it was like between Korea and Vietnam and after World War II and we didn't really know who the villains were. They were just like, yes, Dr. Quest. They had a weird. They were kind of Asian. They were Asian, but they never really said where they were from. They were like Chinese and Vietnamese. We didn't know.

[D]

Just know they're not American. Not American. They're not from Iowa.

[A]

It used to be EAs. We used to just make the guys Nazis.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

And then we got too far away from World War II.

[D]

Yeah. It's like we need to.

[A]

And we got more into Korea and Vietnam, so we had to make them Asian. But we didn't say which Asian country.

[D]

They were bald, too. I'm noticing a lot of the dudes.

[A]

Fu Manchu type mustache. All right, so we're gonna go with a garden variety terrorist.

[D]

Just. Okay, so no, like, just Nobody's wearing.

[A]

The Iraqi flag or anything. It's just weird. We're terrorists now.

[D]

We can go international with it.

[A]

International terrorists, right.

[D]

That'll be better for our box office. Yeah.

[A]

All right. You come chime in. What do you got?

[D]

Well, okay, so I'm thinking, okay, so this terrorist is like. You know, Then we see the terrorist life, and we could possibly do something where the terrorist, he could have been someone that the Rock could have had an interaction with early on in life. You know, like he blew up his. His thing or something.

[A]

He.

[D]

Like, he could have killed Rock's wife or something.

[A]

Let me just jump back in here.

[D]

Well, no, hang on. You don't think if there's, like. Okay, so I don't know, the rocks.

[A]

Over here at the flight, the dusty flight, Nomi Valley. And the terrorists. The terrorists start off of just a group of guys, and they're. They're in a. They're in a. Like an apartment in Glendale.

[D]

I like how you've got this all mapped out. You're like, let me jump in here, Dustin. What do you think? I mean, that. No, no.

[A]

I tried to give you a little mic time, but.

[D]

Well, I mean, because I'm thinking, okay, so they don't. Okay, so he's picturing him sitting around all these drones. You know, they're getting. You know, they're putting this.

[A]

We got the initial first off the phone. It's a bunch of guys smoking and playing cards, like in the middle of the day, like, swarthy guys and wife beaters in, like, a bad apartment in Glendale. And the phone rings, and the one guy just gets up, old school, landline, you know, and he picks it up and he goes, hello. And he goes, I understand. And he hangs the phone up. And he just looks at the other four guys playing cards or look at him. And they all know what happened. They were just activated. And everyone just immediately drops their cards and starts. That's how we know. We don't know what happened. But that's a terrorist cell. And they got activated.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

They got the call.

[D]

I like that. But then maybe a little funny, like comic relief. We'd be like, and the pizza's there, you know?

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Like, oh, whoa, the pizza's here, guys. We just ordered. Can we eat first? Yeah, I know. That's the Vision.

[A]

Fresh ground. Yeah, the parmesan.

[D]

But. Hey, guys, you're gonna pay.

[A]

Listen, we'll. We'll punch it up, okay? We'll punch it up, but we're working.

[D]

Activated. Now they just.

[A]

We're using drones right now we're cutting to first date.

[D]

Okay, first date.

[A]

We're back with. With the rock on. On first Date.

[D]

I think I got a good first date.

[A]

All right, let's go.

[D]

Okay, first date. You're in some nice place, posh, in Beverly Hills, right? And the waiter comes over like, sir, do you need a jacket? We have to have jackets. And he's like. But he's like a, you know, down to earth. He's like, okay, I'll put on this jacket it. And he's trying to read the menu. But he's like, what? Eski is like, that is the escargot, sir. Do you like. That is very. And then she's like, I'm. I'm sorry I picked this place. I just really. He's like, you know what? I think I got a better place. Let's ditch this. And they take off. Then we cut to Dave and Buster's or something, and they're playing skeeball, right? Because then you could get that sponsorship, the money from the movie, you know, either. Or like a buffalo wild wing.

[A]

No, no, Dave and Buster's. And he's out on like the go kart track, and he keeps mashing into people. She's beating the crap out of him. And then he does the piece of dialogue that's self serving, where he goes flying F16 at 500 knots, nine inches away from a wingtip of my partner. I can't drive a go kart. You know the one where he builds himself up and then ends up self deprecating. She laughs real hard.

[D]

Okay, maybe. Yeah. Okay, so this is after she beat him. So they're out there. He's like, God, you know, you beat me, blah, blah. And then, I don't know, I picture her with cotton candy or something. You know, maybe she's like, yeah, I don't know. I just want some cotton candy right now. But anyway, they. That's. This is definitely where now they have to. About to kiss or something. But then news.

[A]

Yeah. On. On tv.

[D]

I'm picturing, like, they're talking, then he just sees something. I was like, wait, hang on a second.

[A]

Yeah, there was a drone attack on the Hollywood Bowl.

[D]

What is this?

[A]

Yeah, the drone attack on Hollywood Bowl.

[D]

On Hollywood Bowl. And then the president's coming. Something like, where all the other planes don't work. Maybe.

[A]

No, no, it's not happening yet. You keep jumping to the. By the way, all the other planes don't work. It's not. You'd have to work that one out.

[D]

Well, it's. I don't know. Cause it's an old plane. That's what I was thinking. Now the new planes, they got computers.

[A]

Okay, now we're getting somewhere. Yeah, yeah.

[D]

Because he's in an old plane. Yeah.

[A]

Okay. Cause I already did Navageddon. This one with Bruce Willis and he's driving a Bronco and everyone's driving an electric car. Yes, there is. They do like one of those pulse grid things.

[D]

Electromagnetic pulse.

[A]

Right. That takes out all the computers of all the modern aircraft and control towers and missiles and everything else. It's all computer guided everything and the pulse renders it all. But he's flying an old biplane, like a crop dusting plane from the 30s.

[D]

Off of gas and grit.

[A]

Right. Gas and grit. And he can. But remember, he did precision flying with the Blue Angels for all that time. So he said. But again, you're jumping. We're still out.

[D]

We're still at David Buster's. Okay. First day. But then something does happen on the news.

[A]

There's a drone attack.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

On the Hollywood bowl. But that's them doing a kind of test run. Like, could they do it? You know?

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

And then. And then remember he's military, you know, and she's like, oh my God, what happened? And he. He knows there's more. He knows they're planning something going on. Something. Something bigger, dude.

[D]

Or that attack that they did, they could be like, we. If you don't. Like, they could threaten. Like, this is what we can do. If you don't release Ablaze who Daki Maheedi shot. Oh, we're not going that way. Right? If you don't.

[A]

No, no, you can go with it.

[D]

Okay, well, yeah. If you don't release this guy from prison who got in there for war crimes, we're gonna take this attack to a bigger event, you know, so.

[A]

Now hold on.

[D]

What?

[A]

It's the Los Angeles Olympics in 2020. Perfect.

[D]

Yes. Okay.

[A]

That's what they're showing up for. And it's the.

[D]

I like our timeline.

[A]

We can get a lot of President. The president. It'll be a black president. Black female. Black female President.

[D]

Perfect.

[A]

The Mrs. Madam Black Female President person is going to be motorcycle.

[D]

Should we make her transgendered or is that too. But definitely bald? If she's.

[A]

She's got to be Bald, you're right. That's good.

[D]

Definitely bald.

[A]

All right. So bald. I don't say transgender. She'll look very regal, like Angela Bassett, but bald.

[D]

She looks like the bad guy from the Johnny Quest, but like a female black.

[A]

Vers. You're making a mockery of this. She's a very angular, very attractive bald black woman. Madam President is going to be there, right? And she's gonna be. And they've just renovated the Coliseum, and this is the opening for the Los Angeles Olympics. You know what I mean? And. And you show. Now he's up in the air, coming back from drawing. You know, he just drew, you know, USA all the way or something. In front of.

[D]

Just out of his own dime. Or did they hire him?

[A]

No, like the Olympic team.

[D]

The Olympics hired him.

[A]

Paid for, you know, usa.

[D]

That makes sense. Now he's up there.

[A]

He's up there.

[D]

He's up in the sky and does.

[A]

That move where he sees. She gets on the rain and goes, you know, mama bear, I'm coming home. Starting to run a little low on fuel. Cause we gotta get the low on you.

[D]

Get those sweet buns over here.

[A]

Yeah, right. She's still horny. She's horny all the time. And they do the thing where they do the. Close up on the fuel gauge. You know what I mean? You can see, like, it's a little low.

[D]

Yeah, he can make it back, but.

[A]

It'S a little low enough to make it back. But he's gonna. And as he's heading back, you just see over the mountain, a swarm over the Hollywood sign.

[D]

Oh, that's good.

[A]

The sign. The Hollywood. Then we're down low on the Hollywood sign when music swells, and we just see the swarm.

[D]

I love it.

[A]

Coming over.

[D]

That's gonna make the preview.

[A]

And they've even formed an arrow, like in a Bugs Bunny movie, where bees are, like, chasing a bear and hitting him in the ass. They make a flying arrow, okay? And you see him. He's going past them one way. He just looks up like, holy crap. You know what I mean? They go back, and then he gets back on the blower. Mama bear. They have some sort of drone presentation for the Olympics or something. She's like, nah, I checked with the FAA thing this morning. I didn't say anything about it. And you hear him go. You hear him whisper from her side. Now we're on her end. And he'd. You just hear him go, good Lord. And then that's when we show him. Turn the plane. Turn the. Yeah, hard, hard Bank.

[D]

And she's like, where you going? Hey, your trajectory is. You're supposed to be heading here. You don't have enough gas to make it home with it if you turn around. I can't do that. Mama Bear, we got a problem right now, Right?

[A]

Yeah, no, she goes, you're not going to have enough gas to come back. And he goes, ain't coming. Oh, he knows he's not coming back.

[D]

Okay? And maybe right here, I mean, just to add a little sepi. Okay, Mama Bear, the chick has got to be there, too. His love interest. Like, maybe she was supposed to meet. And she's like, hey, I'm supposed to meet the rock for dinner. That's not his name. Yeah, but, yeah, I'm supposed to meet him for dinner. Sweetie, I don't know what to tell you because he's. He's doing his own thing right now. And then she's like, on the thing, like, what. What's going? Where's he going?

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

And so she knows what's happening, and maybe she could get on. Hey, what. What's. What's going on?

[A]

Right?

[D]

I. I can't come back. Something's going on, you know? And then. So the drones are flying. He and I think this is where you've had this in mind the whole time. That's why you brought up the drones. This is what I think you were thinking. The drones are heading, they're armed, they're about ready to drop their stuff or something. He pulls in front of him, right? And maybe the. Then you go back to the dudes, the terrorists, like, looking at the computer, you're like, what is going on? What is happening here? Who is that? That's not military.

[A]

First they take out the Goodyear blimp is hovering over, filming it. And you have the cut to the guy up there is Bob, Maggie, up here. The best seat in the house, everybody. The best seat in the house. He says, best seat in the house. Boom. Ball of flame.

[D]

And that's when people on the ground know, like, whoa. Something things going on here.

[A]

Right? Right. And because the president is a black woman, when Secret Service tries to usher her away to safety, she goes, get off me. And she stands up because she's a black woman and she's bald.

[D]

She says, get off me, honky. Like she said.

[A]

Okay. You don't think so?

[D]

Okay.

[A]

All right, we can punch up.

[D]

Well, at least keep it in the notes. We'll see.

[A]

But I mean, the point is, is they're trying to take her. Usher away to safety to hide you know, uninsured. Nuh. She took an oath. She's leading this country.

[D]

And she's there, right? She's at the Olympics.

[A]

Yeah, she's there for the opening ceremony. Okay. So now what it comes down to is what got him drummed out of the Blue Angels in the first place was this very experimental, highly dangerous move. But guess who has to replicate that move. Move to hit the lead drone and knock it off its course. To have the other drones follow, it's got to do the same move.

[D]

Yes. And it's almost like. But while this is happening, is he having flashbacks in his.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[D]

And then we'll see, like the. Go back to see his. His. His guy.

[A]

His flashbacks.

[D]

What are you doing?

[A]

Right.

[D]

I don't know if we can do that. Right, Papa Bear?

[A]

Right, right, right. Just.

[D]

Just follow my lead. Then he just sees that.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a lot of flashback. Yeah. A lot of blamed himself, a lot of that kind of stuff.

[D]

For some reason, he sees that like a scene in like Batman Begins or something. And that's just there, you know, like, what was that? What was I thinking about that?

[A]

You know, we can't clear that.

[D]

You don't think so? Okay, okay.

[A]

We can't clear.

[D]

Oh, why is that in my.

[A]

Yeah, he's flashing back. Yeah. Because his wingman died when he did that experimental move. But it's the only one that could think beginning of Cliffhanger. Stallone went out. He did everything he could do. She fell to her death.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

See what I'm saying? But he's still a hero.

[D]

He is still a hero.

[A]

So he has to successfully pull that one off. Now you see him getting in place, and now you hear the gas sputtering. You know what I mean? Back to the gauge.

[D]

Do you want to do that right now?

[A]

A little early. Little early, but let's cut away and get the gauge.

[D]

Okay, let's get it.

[A]

Cut away the gauge. See, it's low now it's in the. At this point. You know what I mean?

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

And she. Now she. The love interest now.

[D]

She's there with Ruth, the horny lady.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[D]

They're giving him commands and stuff.

[A]

She's on. She got onto the thing. Right. And she lives off of the Hollywood reservoir. She lives right off the Hollywood reservoir. And at some point, he's going to do the maneuver that's going to tip the drone. It's a reenactment of the maneuver that got his wingman killed. Even though it wasn't his fault. It's all he could do. He couldn't pull it off. He's gonna pull that off. But it's clear he's not coming home.

[D]

No. And I picture like. So could you. Could she possibly. If she runs out the front patio and opens the door, she could see it maybe in the distance.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Is that too far?

[A]

No, no, that's good. And we're even gonna have a funny. We'll have some. We'll do a little comedy.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Harrison Ford had to land his biplane on a golf course. And we'll have a scene where Harrison Ford's like just drinking a coffee and he just looks up at her and just shakes his head as he goes sputtering by. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. Just cameo cutaway.

[D]

Yeah, I love it.

[A]

Audience will be in on it.

[D]

You know, I picture like a shot put guy. He's about to. Like when he throws it, he's like, what? That's when he sees the drones, you.

[A]

Know, right before we have to have the scene. It's a very LA scene of everyone discovering the drones. So we have the Mexican gardener and he's pushing the lawnmower and he looks up.

[D]

Start with the Mexican guy.

[A]

Start with the Mexican guy. And then at some point, it's like Crip and Blood kind of thing. Music playing. And they're up to some generic. Not. Not any, you know, criminal behavior. It's very la. They're throwing bones. Very la. And they show those guys look up like it's all the starlet, you know, the blonde starlet looks, looks. You know, she's taking. The blonde star is like taking a picture in front of the Hollywood sign or something.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

And she looks. It's everybody who's represented in la, the gay rooftop rave.

[D]

You know, these guys, that guy looks.

[A]

Up, the homeless guy looks up. This is where we make our commentary on the diversity of.

[D]

Yes, I see where you're going. The guy who's like asleep on Fentanyl, he wakes up for a second.

[A]

Right, right. But also, super rich producer out by the pool eating his breakfast.

[D]

I want it on my desk.

[A]

But yesterday.

[D]

I gotta call you back.

[A]

Yeah, right, right, yeah.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

That's our common commentary. Like where we go, oh, see the diversity of LA and all different. We got the richest of the rich and the poorest.

[D]

Everybody.

[A]

It's gonna affect everybody.

[D]

Okay, Yeah, I like that. All right, okay.

[A]

That's a commentary.

[D]

So now we're back at this climax. You know, he's. She knows the lady on the thing is like, don't do it. He's like, I gotta do the move. Don't do it. But President probably by this point has noticed and said, who is that up there?

[A]

Right?

[D]

And they're like, I don't know. And then the guy comes with the information. Like, that's so and so. So and so.

[A]

There's one. There's one. Yeah. There's one thing where the Secret Service guy. They're up on the roof of the Coliseum, you know, they're up at the top, and you see the guy unpacking a case. He pulls a shoulder harness. Stinger missile out. Secret Service guy.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

And he's like, I got a clean shot. And then the guy's down with the President, you know. Yeah. And he goes, goes, take that shot. Take that kill shot. And she's like, don't you dare. She knows something. You know what I mean?

[D]

And I'm thinking like, man, we have a line of communication to the biplanes. Like, get him on it. This is the President of the United States. Who is this?

[A]

Right.

[D]

Madam President. This is the rock. But not my name. You know, it's like, this is Captain, Colonel so and so. So and so.

[A]

Right.

[D]

We got a big problem up here.

[A]

Right.

[D]

Well, what are you gonna do? What? Tell me what's going on.

[A]

On.

[D]

I think I can. I think I can do something, but it's going to be risky.

[A]

But she goes. She goes, how do I know I can trust you? And he goes, ma', am, you're fresh out of options. Fresh out of options.

[D]

I thought you were going to say that. Or you don't.

[A]

That's right.

[D]

I like fresh out of options. You're fresh. You're fresh out of options. She's like. And then she gives a command. Do it. Yeah, and good luck. Like something like, where it's like, you know, he's gonna, like, die.

[A]

Yeah. And the guy. They show the guy with the Stinger missile on his shoulder, and he's got his finger close tight on the finger on the trigger. And there's a guy behind him who's just gonna tap him on the shoulder, which means fire. He's sweating. He's on. I need that command. I need that command.

[D]

We only got one shot at this.

[A]

Got the hand over him. Yeah. Yeah. But she calls. She's got a lot of with done.

[D]

But then this is the moment where. Oh, and one. One crucial thing before he does the move that he's got to get on the line with the daughter. The daughter's gonna be like, we have someone here who wants to talk to You. Daddy.

[A]

Right. Right.

[D]

Jessica. Jessica.

[A]

Yes. Jessica.

[D]

Daddy, I just want you to know I'm sorry for everything. I'm sorry for being such a dick. And I'm sorry I chose to go to Mom's house instead of your house on Christmas.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

It's okay, sweetie. Don't worry.

[A]

Uhhuh.

[D]

Listen, I just want you to know one thing. I love you.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

And always be there. And then, boom, right?

[A]

She goes. She goes, will I see you for Christmas this year? And he goes, promise me you'll light a candle. And that's when. That's the tears. That's where the tears. The tears start flowing.

[D]

Oh, my God.

[A]

Moving in hard.

[D]

Then that music plays. Maybe Terminator 2 type music.

[A]

Oh, now we go. Silen. We don't hear the sound music. Oh, no, but we don't. We don't. No, no. We don't hear the sound of the engine anymore. It's just the music. The music. All we hear is the music at this point.

[D]

I love this. Yeah, that's good, right? And then we move into the final move. And maybe just a hair of. Just a few more flashbacks, you know, him and his daughter.

[A]

He tips the main drone, tips the main drone, and the drones start going. And they start. And the other ones all start following the drone. And at some point, you see the sleeper cell in Glendale. And the guy looks out the window and he's like, huh? Da, da, da. And they're all coming, right? Apartment, boom. Lit up mushroom.

[D]

And then meanwhile, he's out of gas. He's going down. He's going down.

[A]

Dead stick.

[D]

Dead stick.

[A]

He yells, dead stick. We hear chunk.

[D]

And then over the. Over the ravine, you hear like a. You see a mini explosion or something. It's like, oh, he's dead. But then right behind, you see the fire, you see the smoke. And then just the top of his head comes up, right? And he's, like, walking away, right? Walking up.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

It's like, oh, my God. He survived.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Daughter goes, hugs him. I don't know how she gets there.

[A]

So quick, but I got you. You ready?

[D]

What?

[A]

You ready? He's flying that thing. Dead stick.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Out of fuel. Just coasting at this point, knowing there's nothing. There's no place he can. He can set this thing down. But he's flying, flying. Comes over the crest, and there's a kid's party, a big kid's party at the beach. And they have a giant inflatable castle. And he realizes he can time it where he jumps out. Just. He sees it and he's like coming in, you know, and you see the moms that the kids are, they're like, ah. They all start running. And he's gonna come in and slow motion, he climbs out and just jumps out. Like it hits it like a giant air mattress. Like when they do stunts, some ridiculous. And then the plane just safely just goes right into the ocean. Big splash. Big, big splash. In sync. And he's. Okay, here's the comedy. He's in the bouncy castle, he's on his back and he's just like, oh, God. Oh, God. And then from his POV down, you know, down. You look up and there's a fat seven year old hands him a cupcake. Like very sheepishly like. Cause she thinks he fell from the heavens or something. But it's gotta be a fat kid.

[D]

Oh, devil. It's gotta be a fat kid.

[A]

Yeah. And it's just like, he's just showing. Cupcake. Cut. Smash cut that right there.

[D]

And. And you wrap it all up with like somehow the president re back at dav.

[A]

I think they may be back at Dave and bus.

[D]

Oh, Dave Bus. Okay. Yeah, yeah. So like, who should we pitch this to first?

[A]

What do you mean we? That's.

[D]

Hey, come on. You didn't do J. I put in the black president.

[A]

Was the black president yours? I think that was mine.

[D]

She was bald. I. Bald.

[A]

Yeah, you got bald.

[D]

Fine. Garbage. Give her. Give her extensions. I don't care. I want some kind of R. Give. Okay, at least let me play the mechanic or the fat kid at the cast. Me?

[A]

Yeah, you play the fat mechanic kid.

[D]

I'm happy with it as long as I get some residuals from royalties. What's it like?

[A]

Sky Rider.

[D]

Sky Rider. Sky Rider is a good name.

[A]

I mean, it's. It'll work for now. We might come up something better. But Sky Rider, that's kind of.

[D]

That's pretty.

[A]

And by the way, the skywriter's written in skywriting. That's on the post.

[D]

That's the movie poster that you see. Skywriter.

[A]

Right.

[D]

I like it. And at the premiere, obviously you would hire a sky rider.

[A]

Oh, yeah, yeah. Get a skywriter at the premiere.

[D]

Good, I like that. Oh, my agent's calling right now. No, Dustin, you tell him that we're gonna. We want 50.

[A]

Well, again, you didn't. You made some contributions to it. I feel the main plot points I.

[D]

Provided you had this. Let's be honest, you've already written this in final draft like a week ago. And now you just brought it in like, oh, wouldn't it be crazy if this happened?

[A]

I really just kind of worked this one out in real time. But it had a little San Andreas in it with the rock. Cause he flew a helicopter and he had the daughter. I mean, you know, it's pretty cookie cutter, but I didn't think we were.

[D]

Gonna last that long.

[A]

Look at that. We're looking at. We already made a Sky Rider.

[D]

Wow, look at that. I love it.

[A]

Mm.

[D]

That'S really good.

[A]

Yeah. Now who's the chick? She's got to be hot.

[D]

Definitely could make her.

[A]

She can't be nutty. Crazy hot. You know what I mean?

[D]

Lena Dunham. What do you think we're gonna.

[A]

No.

[D]

You don't think so?

[A]

Gotta freshen that up a little bit.

[D]

I don't know. But maybe like a hot Latina chick. That would be good.

[A]

Yeah. Rosario Dawson type.

[D]

Rosario Dawson type.

[A]

I mean, we could go with a Cindy Sweeney type. A Sydney. I should say Sweeney type or.

[D]

She'd be great.

[A]

She'd be good. But a Rosario Dawson kind of age. A little more age appropriate.

[D]

Yeah. And I feel like you're gonna.

[A]

Really.

[D]

Yeah. Putting a Latina in there would be good for the. More market just for Hollywood in general. They would applaud us, right?

[A]

Yeah. The black President Ball did.

[D]

Madam President. Whenever I hear that, I'm like, that's crazy.

[A]

Yeah. Madam President. Yeah. And she's calling the shots.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

He's up there with the Stinger missile.

[D]

I can't believe we talked like 45 minutes about this. Yeah, like I was. Whenever I come do your show too, I'm always like. There's these topics that I'm always like, oh, what are we going to talk about? Is this going to be like a politically charged, like, thing?

[A]

No, we're doing Sky Rider.

[D]

We're doing a made up movie. I was all looking at Fox News last night. All right, what are we gonna talk about?

[A]

We're talking about the rock. We're talking about the box office.

[D]

I like it.

[A]

And it's got a little San Andreas meets gone in 60 seconds, the remake with Nic Cage. There's lots of elements that are all gonna come together. So many elements for this one.

[D]

I mean, I see it going to the theaters. Unless you want to do a direct to.

[A]

No, no, this is.

[D]

Imax.

[A]

Yeah, you gotta see this in imax. All right, let me give Dustin a plug. Wait, where did I get your plugs? Over here, Dustin. Ah, yeah. Mm. Dustin Ybarra. It's Y B A, R, R, A. And we should take a look at your TikTok there.

[D]

Yep, that's what I do. All my metal detecting and my standup. I put my stand up all that online. By the way, thanks to all the Adam Carolla show fans that came out to the shows in Kansas City last I get the Corolla bump man.

[A]

Oh good man.

[D]

It's awesome.

[A]

Glad to have you. I'm being Kimmel's club this weekend. Thursday, Friday, Saturday, two shows each night. Then gonna be at Rodney's in New York. Cat camp's gonna be there. Dr. Drew's gonna be there. You can go to AdamCroll.com for all the live shows. Until next time, this is Adam for Dustin Ybarra and Saiyan Mahala. Pick up her phone and leave us.

[B]

A voicemail at 888-634-1744. Say anything you like and then get tickets to see the ACE [e-mail].

[F]

This September, CBS hits are streaming free on Pluto TV. I'm coming in hot for this month only you can watch full seasons of the CBS shows you love. From the courtroom drama of Matlock to the heroics of Fire country. Go back to where it all began in NCIS Origins or watch the hilarious hauntings of ghosts. All for free. Full seasons of the CBS shows you love this month only on Pluto tv. Stream now pay Never. This September, CBS hits are streaming free on Pluto TV tv.

[A]

I'm coming in hot for this month.

[F]

Only you can watch full seasons of the CBS shows you love. From the courtroom drama of Matlock to the heroics of Fire country, go back to where it all began in NCIS Origins or watch the hilarious hauntings of ghosts. All for free. Full seasons of the CBS shows you love this month only on Pluto tv. Stream now pay Never.