Grant Cardone and Adam Carolla Expose California’s Land Grab Scam

Summary

Adam Carolla Show

Grant Cardone and Adam Carolla Expose California’s Land Grab Scam

Date: October 7, 2025
Guest: Grant Cardone (entrepreneur, author, Malibu homeowner)
Main Theme: The episode centers on the aftermath of devastating Malibu fires and alleged state and local regulatory overreach, which both Adam and Grant characterize as a "land grab" and a mechanism for government-controlled property seizure. The conversation expands into broader critiques of California’s policies, permitting, housing, and political landscape.

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Episode Overview

Adam Carolla hosts Grant Cardone for an in-depth discussion exposing what they describe as a coordinated effort by California state and local government agencies to block fire victims from rebuilding, using heavy-handed regulations as a "land grab scam." They share personal experiences, dissect how bureaucracy and environmental policies weaponize red tape, and query who is really benefitting from the regulatory paralysis. Throughout, they take aim at local politicians, environmental commissions, and the enduring exodus from California. The episode is sharp-tongued, engaging, and packed with relatable analogies for a nationwide audience.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Grant's Malibu Fire Experience and Aftermath

[03:45 – 10:56]

• Devastation: Grant’s Malibu neighborhood suffered catastrophic fire damage—18 out of 20 houses on his block burned down (including all adjacent properties).
• Insurance Shortfall: Most neighbors were underinsured for multimillion-dollar damages, with only ~$3M in coverage for $10M+ homes.
• Regulatory Barriers: FEMA and local laws stipulate that if Grant spends over 50% of his home's assessed value on repairs, he must completely demolish and rebuild to new codes (raise house 13" for floodplain, replace full foundation) — an unnecessary, exorbitant cost since there are “never” flood threats in Malibu.
  • Quote:

    “If you spend more than $1 more than 50% of the property's value… you need to scrape the house to the ground…raise the house 13 inches higher because of the new floodplain laws by FEMA.”
    — Grant Cardone [09:03]

2. Adam’s Analogies & Frustration with Bureaucracy

[11:55 – 14:36]

• “You Don’t Really Own Your Property”: Adam compares California permitting to having your car keys taken — you still pay taxes but need the government’s approval (and pay extra) to “drive” your own property again.
  • Quote:

    “So, do I own the property? I feel like they’re calling the shots, right? You want your permit, your keys back…Oh, it’s your property when it’s time to pay the taxes. But you don’t get to drive it.”
    — Adam Carolla [13:15]

• Overregulation & Inflation: Blue state “overregulation” drives up costs, delays, and ultimately blocks ordinary people from rebuilding.

3. Allegations of Intentional State "Land Grab"

[14:36 – 16:12]

• Locked Out During Crisis: Grant recounts being barred from his own home after the fire under “safety” pretenses, unable to collect essentials.
• Historical Precedent: He likens modern regulatory practices to coordinated land seizures in the 1800s during financial crises.
  • Quote:

    “This is land seizure. This is a land grab. This goes back to the 1800s...inspired the banks to raise rates, take away the ranches and farms. This is happening in California.”
    — Grant Cardone [14:54]

4. The Fire Department, Rebuilding Realities & Lot Sales

[16:12 – 27:13]

• Fire Dept. Tactics: The fire department entered homes by sawing open garage doors and breaking down doors — damage which ironically counts against victims’ repair budget.
  • Quote:

    “They did their part…But if they did two and a half million dollars worth of damage...a dollar over last year’s assessed value, I have to tear the house to the ground.”
    — Grant Cardone [30:48]

• Unrebuildable Losses: Even those with insurance payouts can’t afford to rebuild due to rising materials/labor and underinsurance.
• Who's Buying Lots? Discussion of foreign investment (Chinese, New Zealand buyers), wealthy speculators doubling down on a future recovery, and the effective blockage of middle and even upper class owners’ ability to return.

5. Why Zero Building in Malibu?

[27:37 – 34:30]

• Building Freeze: Malibu exhibits “literally zero” new construction, compared to some activity in the Palisades (likely due to pre-fire permits still being honored).
• Code Disparities & Fireproof Construction: Ironically, state agencies block new concrete block or fireproof homes, forcing the use of outdated, vulnerable wood construction.
  • Quote:

    “If you go by every single house in the Palisades...every single house under construction...it’ll burn to the ground again. It is all lumber…Why are they building out of wood again? And now it makes sense because that's what they were permitted for before.”
    — Adam Carolla [33:15]

6. Systemic Problems, Political Rants, and The Duesenberg Analogy

[44:45 – 47:32]

• California’s Potential vs. Mismanagement: Adam likens California to a classic Duesenberg car — inherently great, just needs a restoration from a “competent shop” (aka, real leadership, not endless commissions and bureaucrats).
  • Quote:

    “If we don't get it into a skilled, competent shop soon, there won't be anything to transport…you, as a person who's invested in the Duesenberg, should want somebody…who can take this Duesenberg… and restore it.”
    — Adam Carolla [45:18]

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Notable Quotes & Exchanges

• Intent vs. Incompetence:

  • “You can't keep consecutively missing. At some point, it's your intention to miss.”
    — Grant Cardone [05:00]
  • “I had a game I always played called ‘Stupid or Liar.’ …Is Gavin Newsom trying to destroy California or is he just incompetent?”
    — Adam Carolla [04:12]

• Who Owns Property?

  • “It’s my property, they’re my oak trees, and I’m not going anywhere near them. And yet, I have to put chain link fence around every single tree...”
    — Adam Carolla [12:49]

• Communism & Control:

  • “If the communists can control California…they’re making a play at both [CA and NY].”
    — Grant Cardone [32:25]

• Permits, Fast-tracking, and the Coastal Commission:

  • “There’s no fast-track process...Coastal [Commission]...controls 1100 miles by 12 people that meet 12 times a year.”
    — Grant Cardone [37:41]
  • “They should be called the cock blockers, because they...prevent everyone from building.”
    — Adam Carolla [38:28]

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Timestamps for Essential Segments

• Grant’s Fire Experience & Regulatory Nightmare: [03:45–14:36]
• Property Rights & Overregulation Analogies: [11:55–14:36]
• Land Grab History, Regulatory Lockout: [14:36–16:12]
• Insurance, Foreign Buyers & Market Collapse: [22:33–27:13]
• Malibu vs. Palisades: Why No Rebuilding? [27:37–34:30]
• Fireproofing, Building Codes, and Bureaucratic Stalemate: [33:15–37:35]
• California Political Rant & Solutions (The Duesenberg Analogy): [44:45–47:32]

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Memorable Moments

• Garage Door “Break-In” Detected by Adam: Adam’s girlfriend points out evidence of a break-in at Grant’s home—Adam deduces it was the fire department using a battery DeWalt circular saw [16:12–18:22].
• Despair Over Rebuilding Costs for Neighbors: Grant tries to advise neighbor Barbara not to cash the insurance check; she won’t be able to rebuild with it [36:54–37:35].
• Riff on the Coastal Commission: Adam and Grant lambaste the Coastal Commission, calling it an out-of-touch group of “angry lesbians” blocking progress [38:10–39:18].

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Tone & Style

The episode is shot through with Adam’s signature snark and blue-collar clarity, while Grant provides concrete data, real-world anecdotes, and open frustration. The pair’s banter is rich in metaphor for national listeners and unapologetic in its critique of California governance.

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Takeaways for Listeners

• For fire victims: Don’t expect government assistance or permitting to keep your rebuild feasible—you'll face an obstacle course of bureaucracy that may force you to sell out.
• For broader audiences: California’s regulatory culture may portend similar developments elsewhere. Property rights may be more notional than real, as bureaucratic barriers can make ownership meaningless.
• For political enthusiasts: The hosts see restoration primarily as a function of ousting entrenched political machines and commissions—registering “red” if only to send a message.

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Episode Conclusion

The episode closes with the hosts agreeing to meet at their Malibu homes, cementing a bond born from shared frustration. Adam invites Grant for gazpacho and a “Mike Rowe walkthrough” to inspect the damage—a wry, neighborly touch in a world upended by state and local dysfunction.

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For anyone looking for an irreverent but eye-opening exploration of California property and civil rights in crisis, this episode encapsulates both the dark comedy and real despair of being a property owner in the Golden State circa 2025.

Transcript

[Adam Carolla]

Well, back on the show is businessman extraordinaire and motivational speaker, author and Malibu homeowner. Got a lot of info. Grant Cardone joins me. Alicia Krause has the news and we'll do all that right after this.

[Show Announcer]

Adam Carolla returns to New York City Thursday, October 9th at Rodney Dangerfield's Comedy Club with Cat Timpf and Matt Friend. Two shows October 9th and then don't miss the Ace man in Pottstown, Pennsylvania on Friday, October 10th and Saturday, October 11th at Soljol's. Adam returns to Flappers in Burbank on October 29th. Get tickets for these and every [e-mail].

[Adam Carolla]

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From Corolla Wong Studios in Glendale, California, this is the Adam Carolla Show. Adam's guest today entrepreneur Grant Cardone. Plus the news with the Washington Examiners, Alicia Kraus. And now a man who doesn't live a life of quiet desperation or of quiet anything. Adam Carolla.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, get it on, man Got to get it on. No choice but to get on, man to get on. Grant Cardone has joined us. Businessman, entrepreneur, author, motivational speaker, and land, or I should say dwelling owner in Malibu and beyond. Good to see you. Granted.

[Grant Cardone]

Good to see you, Adam. I wish it was under better circumstances. Your state. Your state in it is. I mean, I don't even know what to say about it, brother.

[Adam Carolla]

Like.

[Grant Cardone]

Like, these are the most criminal, vicious, evil people. This is not. Everybody keeps saying they're ignorant. What's the other word they use for incompetence?

[Adam Carolla]

Yes.

[Grant Cardone]

This is not incompetence. You cannot manufacture this much incompetence in a human race.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, you know, brings me to an analogy I always kind of think of, because I'd always talk to Dr. Drew, and I would always kind of go, I had a game I always would play called Stupid or Liar. Are you stupid or are you lying? And I usually gave people the credit of stupid versus liar. But the analogy I used to use is, I would say, is Gavin Newsom trying to destroy California, or is he just incompetent? Which is a weird choice because it's sort of like, you know, you saying, oh, we got a kicker on our football team. Does he hate our football team? No, no. He's just a horrible, horrible kicker. He doesn't know what he's doing. You know what I mean? It's kind of a weird place. Either way, you're screwed.

[Grant Cardone]

You can't keep missing, you know, you can't keep consecutively missing. At some point, it's intention. It's your intention to miss.

[Adam Carolla]

That's what I'm starting to come around to. So first things first. I feel like you're more plugged in than I am. I walk around, I do a vlog. I sort of tour.

[Grant Cardone]

I've seen that.

[Adam Carolla]

And there's a latest one is fresh and out there. It's just a few days old. If people want to check out Adam Carolla's Malibu vlog, you'll learn a lot. But I don't have inside dope. I just walk around and I come at it as more of a former builder kind of angle than I do as a politician. But I announce the day after the fire, in the morning, right after the fire from my hotel room. I was displaced at that. There shall be no building back because there's gonna be no permits. And that's the way they like it. And nine months in, so far, I'm correct. But what do you know?

[Grant Cardone]

Well, this is what I know. Like, they, like most of America, saw Donald Trump land on the ground and the Palisades. And the mayor says, we're going to fix it, we're going to expedite it, we're going to do whatever we have to. Yes, sir. Yes, sir. Nothing has been done. Okay. There's no expediting, there's no fast track, there's no quick permits, there's no 110% of the build. In fact, two weeks ago, I got a letter from Malibu saying, Mr. Cardone, if you spend. I'm on. You've probably been in front of my house numerous times. It's right across from the firehouse on Carbon beach, just down.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, that's your. Oh, you're right across from the firehouse. 70.

[Grant Cardone]

Yeah, that's right. Okay, so I'm right there on the corner, 18 homes adjacent to me burnt.

[Adam Carolla]

To the ground on both sides. Well, I know the area well. When you face your home, all the houses to the left and all houses to the right burned down pretty much.

[Grant Cardone]

Right. I'm basically the last man standing.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay. Right.

[Grant Cardone]

Who's the dude on the corner with the little rock house? He used to hang out with Nicholson.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't know. There is a guy who literally is like Hansel and Gretel's granddad who built the house out of sea stones. Like one, one at a time.

[Grant Cardone]

Super famous LA guy. I'll think of his name here in a second, but I'm next door to him. Despite that, 18 homes adjacent to me burnt to the ground. No one had more than $3 million worth of insurance. Okay. I had more insurance than the other 18 homes combined because I had it under my umbrella. So the crazy thing is, Adam, I'm protected in this thing, so I don't need anybody to feel sorry for the rest of me. And for the rest of this story, I'm the only one with insurance. And my house did not burn down. However, it was damaged by the fires. And there's somewhere between. Somewhere between probably 4 and 6 million, maybe 8 million, 10 million, 14, 15 million dollars worth of damage. Nobody can quite assess what it is yet.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, let's just go slow for a second. Just for the people listening. In Indiana, $3 million worth of coverage may sound like a lot for a 1800 square foot home on a 6500 square foot lot, but the houses that burn down, there are 10 million plus, so you're. Plus. I mean that's just a single lot. Sort of small beach cabana. So now you do the math. You got three grand, three million worth of coverage and 11.7 million worth of damage to or home destroyed.

[Grant Cardone]

Yeah, well, so my next door neighbor, he's got. It's burnt to the ground. There is nothing there. He calls me the other day and says, Grant, I got a 25 discount on the tax assessment this year. What do you think about that? I said, bro, what kind of math do you do? Okay, you have zero there. You should be paying no taxes until you have a house again. What's wrong with you? These people are crazy, bro. So my home is not burnt down, but there will be somewhere between 3 and $15 million worth of damage to get rid of the smoke. FEMA came out and said, Mr. Cardone, if you spend more than $1 more than 50% of the property's value, not the land's value, just the house's assessed value. If you spend $1 more than last year's assessment, you need to scrape the house to the ground. You've been saying this, by the way, about septic tanks. You need to scrape the house down to the ground, remove the structure that is in perfect condition to raise the house 13 inches higher because of the new floodplain laws by FEMA. Now, as you know, Carbon beach and Malibu have never had water threats. Never had flood threats. I have never had water on my deck. They're going to force me to spend $60 million if I spend $1 more than last year's homes assessment.

[Adam Carolla]

More than 50% of last year.

[Grant Cardone]

More than 50%.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, so if the home was assessed at 30 million bucks, if you spent 15 million and a dollar, then you got to raise the thing down to the ground.

[Grant Cardone]

Then I have to remove 26 inch concrete slab. My entire house is a 26 inch.

[Adam Carolla]

Your entire house is a 26 inch concrete slab.

[Grant Cardone]

26 inches of concrete slab. It was only built 14 years ago. It's got 32 inch pylons, 35ft into bedrock. Yeah, this concrete. And if I didn't have all that, my house would be burnt to the ground anyway.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm going to say I'll buy the grade beams into the bedrock. I don't buy the slab. You must be on grade beams and then a slab in between grade beams. And the grade beams are 26 inches tall. A 26 inch thick slab is insane. Like a commercial parking structures. That's what it is, is 12 or 14 or something. All right, so you got this labyrinth of grade beams that go into these caissons and then a slab on top of that. So you have yards and yards and yards of concrete. And just to demo that stuff out is, you know, cataclysmic in terms of the amount of work it would be.

[Grant Cardone]

This is, this is what happens when blue states overregulate. Not just California, New York, New Jersey, they all do it. They overregulate and they basically, with their regulations, they cause inflation.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, also, basically you say, look, it's essentially like me saying, I'll take the keys to your car, right? And then you go, that's my car. And I go, no, that's your car. I don't want your car. But you only get the keys back if you do xyz. And then you go, you're taking my car? And they go, no, no, I'm not taking your car. I'm just holding the keys to. To your car. But you don't get to drive it until you do all the stuff I want and pay me. And then maybe I'll get you the keys back, but not in a timely fashion. So I hope you're not going out tonight, but don't worry, I'm not taking your car. Well, it's like. Well, I kind of think you are. I mean, I literally was trying to do some work in LA Canada, California, and there was oak trees, which are an endangered species in La Canada, except for the places littered with oak trees. You can't go five feet without running into an oak tree, but they try to protect them. And so when you do construction in La Canada, you have to put a fence around all the oak trees. This was on a hill house. I had oak trees. Half an acre on a hill that a billy goat couldn't get to. And I'm building at the bottom. I have no intention of going up this hill. I don't even know how you would build off of that hill. I'm down at the bottom where it's flat. They say you gotta take chain link fence and put it around the 25 oak trees at the top of the hill that you can't even. You have to get a guy who climbs Half Dome and mountain climbing gear to put a fence around these things. It's my property, they're my oak trees and I'm not going anywhere near them. And yet I have to put chain link fence around every single tree that I can't even get to. And when I drove around to other municipalities like Beverly Hills and stuff, I saw them putting this sort of orange mesh nylon tape stuff around the trees, like just saying to the construction guys, don't take this tree down. I went back to the city, I said, how about I just do the orange mesh stuff? They said, no, you gotta rent the chain link fence. I was like, okay, well then who owns the property? Do I own the property? Exactly. I don't think I own the property. I feel like they're calling the shots, right? You want your permit, you want your keys back, you want to drive your car? Oh, no, it's your property when it's time to pay the taxes, but you don't get to drive it. We'll hold the keys.

[Grant Cardone]

And Adam, this is. This started after the fires. I couldn't get on my property. I couldn't go check on my stuff. I couldn't go check on my air condition, my heater, my clothes, my kids things, the things that were important to our family. You cannot come on the property for your safety, Mr. Cardone, you can't come here. Couldn't pick up my own shit. Even though it was my, my, my house. I couldn't put my health at risk. Even though that's my body. I can't spend the money I want on my house without the state getting involved. This is land seizure. This is a land grab. This goes back to the 1800s. You know, they convince America to take on too much debt, and then they inspired the banks to raise rates and take away the, the, the, the ranches and the farms. This is happening in the state of California. They're going to take the Palisades, they're going to take Malibu, they're going to take Altadena Pro. Probably don't even want it, but they're going to take it. And, and then they're going to push out all the people that have a voice. They're going to let in everyone that's illegal and doesn't have a job or a house, and they're going to say, hey, push them out. We'll claim federal funding. We'll depend on the federal government for funding because we'll basically just say we're upside down because the state of California rolls over. It takes down the, the country. So they'll just depend on federal funding. They'll claim their state back, all the land back. They're probably going to do whatever they want with my beach. Well, the surfers are going to be happy about it.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, let me ask you this because I know the area. Well, first off, a weird question. Was your garage door Cut? Yes. And did somebody drop a circular saw into it? And did someone get a battery operated circular saw and tried to drop it into the middle of your garage door to bust some kind of access open inside your garage door?

[Grant Cardone]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay, let me explain something. I walked that and would walk that with my girlfriend all the time. And at some point she stopped and she said, somebody tried to get into this house. And she said, somebody tried to saw. I said, somebody took a circular saw, probably a cordless circular saw, and they dropped it into the center of the panel and it looked like they made four cuts, like a square. That would have been two foot by two foot. And it's what I would have done. If you told me to break into someone's garage and all I had was an 18 volt DeWalt circular saw, battery operated one, I would have dropped that. I said, that's what happened. But nobody busted into it. And she said, do you think they're trying to rob the house? And I said, I don't know. They said, you think it's the fire department? The fire department? Yes. And I said, I think it was the fire department.

[Grant Cardone]

It was the fire department, dude. It was the fire department. Those guys love me. I've always supported them. And they lost 18 homes. They knew mine was about to go down. Mine was lit up, man. It was on fire. I'll send you the pictures of it. They got 18 foot tale of flames going underneath my house. Had it not been the concrete block, it would be burnt to the ground. By the way, the other 18 homes, Adam, what they had in common was that none of them were concrete block.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes, yes. So I have studied the area closely.

[Grant Cardone]

That's the home right there. I don't know if you can see that.

[Adam Carolla]

No, I know it. It's right across the street. I'm the guy who figured out someone tried to get in your garage by dropping a circular saw.

[Grant Cardone]

No, that was the fire department, dude. They saved my.

[Adam Carolla]

But they didn't get in that way.

[Grant Cardone]

Yeah, they did. That's how they got in the house.

[Adam Carolla]

But how, why?

[Grant Cardone]

And they blew out. They blew out the front door too. So all that. And by the way, FEMA is going to count all that as part of the 50%.

[Adam Carolla]

Really spend.

[Grant Cardone]

Imagine I just spend. Let's say I spend two and a half. I think the property assessed value last year was 5 million. $5,225.2 million.

[Adam Carolla]

The property just. No, just the land is what you're saying.

[Grant Cardone]

Just. Just the home. Just the house.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, sorry. Not the Land.

[Grant Cardone]

The lot's probably worth 40 million.

[Adam Carolla]

I was going to say the lot. Yeah. So just it's a structure.

[Grant Cardone]

Triple.

[Adam Carolla]

Right, the structure. Right.

[Grant Cardone]

Yeah. So I, you know, we push the property value down, the house value. But if I spend two and a half, 2.6 million cleaning out the fire, fixing the shit that the fire department. Thank God they tore down the garage door, the front door, they blew out windows that, you know, if I spend 2.6 million and $1, I'll be forced to take the entire home down.

[Adam Carolla]

Right, right.

[Grant Cardone]

So it's structure underneath it. And you can see these pylons.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes.

[Grant Cardone]

In images. Those pylons go 35 in. 35ft into deep granite.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Into bedrock.

[Grant Cardone]

So this home has never been threatened by water, ever?

[Adam Carolla]

No, I. The crazy part about the regulation is many of those houses that ran along. I mean, that guy's house. Hansel and Gretel's grandfather, who built his houses. Lou Adler.

[Grant Cardone]

Lou Adler.

[Adam Carolla]

Lou Adler, okay. Lou Adler was a producer. He was a music producer. He was Nicholson's buddy. Lou Adler would be the guy with the funny hat who sat next to Jack at every Lakers game. That would be Lou Adler.

[Grant Cardone]

That's right.

[Adam Carolla]

That house looks like it was built in 1929. Or actually, the one on the corner. The next one over, the Spanish one looks.

[Grant Cardone]

No, you got the right one. Lou Aller's house didn't burn down either. Guess what it's made of rock.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. Literally, from the ocean.

[Grant Cardone]

But, I mean, the Coastal Commission won't let you build out a concrete.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[Grant Cardone]

They don't want you to build out of concrete because concrete don't burn.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. So here's what we're saying. Many of those houses that did burn were built in the 40s and the 50s. Despite their constant talk about rising seas and Al Gore and the rest of, you know, Greta Thunberg and the rest of the bullshit artists, nothing has moved because if the sea rose. Those houses are 80 years old. Some of them, well, they're not there anymore, but they've been there for 80 years. Where's the ocean? Why isn't PCH routinely flooded if it's only 7ft above the sea level when the tide is high? You have to ask yourself, it's never flooded. It's never flooded years.

[Grant Cardone]

But in 85 years. There's been 8,000 fires every year for 85 years. And they wouldn't let people rebuild over there, which is all. Those homes were made of timber. They're like little matchboxes.

[Adam Carolla]

Agreed. And by the way, Timber.

[Grant Cardone]

Timber. Sitting in the sun 24 hours a day, 365 days of the year with salt on it for 85 years, just sitting there, knowing that fires come every year. Santa Ana has come every year. 8,500 fires. There's no spike in new fires, by the way. It's the same amount of fires every year since the Native Americans were there.

[Adam Carolla]

So many lots are for sale to the Santa Monica side of your dwelling, and many to the Ventura county side, the Pepperdine side, you know, but to the Santa Monica side. I counted them and it was in my last vlog. Well, no, I'm just talking about literally just. Just a quarter mile on the beach.

[Grant Cardone]

There was east, let's call La Costa Beach.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, there was eight or nine were for sale. Just on a small stretch, very small stretch. So what are those people? Who's buying that and why are those people selling?

[Grant Cardone]

Well, they're selling because they can't afford to rebuild. Because as you said earlier, the rebuild will cost 8 to 10 million. But they can only get $3 million worth of insurance, right? So who would spend 10 million on a house if you can only insure it for 3 million? More importantly, what bank will insure. What bank would give a mortgage, right? 10 million dollar house with only 3 million dollars worth of coverage.

[Adam Carolla]

It won't happen, right?

[Grant Cardone]

Dude, they got this thing set up to where people cannot. Not only can they not afford it, they can. But the people that can afford it, and this is what America needs to understand. They're not just bleeding out the middle class now. They're going all the way into the wealth ban. They've done this for years, by the way. And unless you're Larry Ellison and you can buy three or four lots at a time, which he has on that beach that I'm on, he didn't lose any of his homes, by the way. Your boy, you over there. Your boy Rick Caruso, Ricky Boyd, that's made $3 billion and will run for governor of the state of California as a Democrat, even though he's a lifetime Republican and a politician. Since he was 22 years old, he's made $3 billion, maybe 5, in Los Angeles county and is going to act like he's the saving grace there. He made all his money under this watch.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, we can get into the official particulars with Rick Caruso, who I don't know well, but I like him from the times that I got to spend, albeit it was on his yacht. So, you know.

[Grant Cardone]

Yeah, well, you know, you tend to like people when they're the ones with the keys to the yacht.

[Adam Carolla]

That's true. So are the Chinese buying these lots? So let me just break down the math for, again, the people listening in Indiana, these are very small lots. Now, you're on a triple lot, but the average lot is about 6,500 square feet. And I mean, you know, people aren't mathematicians, but These lots are 30ft wide, and they go about 65ft into the. And then they. And then the ocean starts. This is a. If you walked up on this lot, you would say, well, this is enough room to build a small guest house or a cottage on. But you wouldn't build a full size home on this lot. So they're very small lots. There's nothing on them except for what is left of the foundation. And in some cases, it's pylons that were rammed down in the ground.

[Grant Cardone]

Old timber.

[Adam Carolla]

Timber. Basically, what would look like telephone poles coming up from the sand and burnt three feet from the top. Others have caissons with cement poured into them and grade beams and rebar and stuff like that. Those would be the newer homes. But These lots are 6 million bucks. I don't know, 5, 5, 6. Somewhere in that range.

[Grant Cardone]

Yep.

[Adam Carolla]

And then your Chinese businessman, let's say.

[Grant Cardone]

Or New Zealand. New Zealand.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, New Zealand I heard about, too. Yeah. All right, so you buy a $6 million lot and then you go. We can put 2000 square feet on this $6 million lot, and the 2000 square foot home is gonna be 1500 bucks a square foot or something. I'm not sure. I mean, with the septic and all that, I don't know what. But you got 6 million in a lot, you build 4 million worth of home, now you're in at 10, and the thing's worth 13, 5. Is that the math?

[Grant Cardone]

Maybe 15, maybe 18, maybe 20. Depends on how many. Look, if one out of three people don't rebuild, you got a much bigger beach right now, looking west, I have a perfect view. My view got improved.

[Adam Carolla]

Sure. Mine did, too.

[Grant Cardone]

You know the problem? Yours did, too.

[Adam Carolla]

It did.

[Grant Cardone]

The problem is the community got destroyed.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. No, I mean, you can see the waves crashing on the beach where you formerly couldn't see it because there were structures there. So are people buying? So whether it's the New Zealand brothers, Nick and Matt Mowbray I'm reading here. Or making a bet.

[Grant Cardone]

They're making a bet, Adam. They're saying, hey, California will come back just like San Francisco did after the fires. If you can. If you can Weather, if you will, if you can, Weather four or five years and wait for the community to come back, there's going to be fewer homeowners, fewer people on the beach. The rich, you know, those that make the bet right now will get richer and there'll always be somebody that wants to live there.

[Adam Carolla]

Sure. And there's always people with money and they'll live on the beach. But here's a question that has been vexing me, and I don't have an answer for it, which is the Palisades has some new building happening. Not a lot, but some. When you drive through Sunset, through the Palisades on your way to Malibu, as I do often, I take note of houses framed, going up and there's, you know, I don't know, I haven't put a headcount on them, but there's quite a few structures being built in the Palisades. There's still many burnt out empty lots for certain. But there is some new construction in Malibu. There's zero construction, literally zero. There's not a lumber drop anywhere you.

[Grant Cardone]

Don'T want to hammer?

[Adam Carolla]

No, no. There's no materials. So why is there some building in the Palisades and zero in Malibu? And then who is building in the Palisades? And I speculated that those were buildings that were newer, where they had the plans on file and they weren't gonna alter the plans.

[Grant Cardone]

From what I understand, and it's very reliable information, the only thing that has been permitted in Apollo States were pre fire permits.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[Grant Cardone]

They were already approved, already in place, by the way. I buy that completely.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[Grant Cardone]

Because if you look at Malibu, there's nothing zero there. If you look at Malibu again and you see what survived the fires, it was only concrete, brick, a concrete block that survived the fires.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Poured in place, by the way, just for, just for accuracy.

[Grant Cardone]

Poured in place, modern build, modern glass, concrete and glass. It was built in the last, anywhere from, you know, the last two years to 10 or 15 years, where that's what you built.

[Adam Carolla]

There's literally a house up the street, PCH from you, that is built like Hitler's bunker. It is that new house that is poured concrete. The Wall's gotta be 14 inches thick. It would withstand a nuclear strike. Like there's nothing. Forget about fire. That thing could take a missile to the side of it and would still be there. That thing is crazy. And that one got a little damage on the side too. Just like yours got, probably even more. But the thing I still can't figure out about your garage door is I saw where they cut into it, but they never popped the panel off. So I don't know how they got into your house.

[Grant Cardone]

Yeah, they got it in through the front door.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, okay. So they started on the garage, and then, like.

[Grant Cardone]

So, like, just the damage that the fire department. By the way, God bless the fire department. They did their part, and I really appreciate those guys putting them themselves at risk. They. They did their. Their thing with very little water, by the way.

[Adam Carolla]

If.

[Grant Cardone]

If they did two and a half million dollars worth of damage, if I just go fix the damage they did and get rid of the smoke, if that's a dollar over last year's assessed value, I have to tear the house down to the ground, get rid of the lower structure, the foundation.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. So where. Where do you know that would suggest.

[Grant Cardone]

To me, though, Adam, that they want me to take the house down.

[Adam Carolla]

I guess everything sounds so counterintuitive to me because I'm like, well, they're misguided or they don't know what they're talking about, but I guess not.

[Grant Cardone]

You can't be that misguided. You can't. Look, I spent 10 years of my life fucked up. Even at my worst, 10 years, I can't make that many errors.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, to be sure, there is zero building in Malibu, and it's not even close. I've not even seen the beginnings of building.

[Grant Cardone]

So does that look like that should be torn to the ground? Let me see if I can get.

[Adam Carolla]

No, I'm looking. I'm looking at your home. Look, it's magnificent and it's beautiful. And like I said, a fishing shack on that stretch of beach is 12 million bucks. And this thing's a palace. So how many square feet is it?

[Grant Cardone]

10,000. I mean, you can't build it again. I have a swimming pool in front. They won't let me build that again.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, no, no. Yeah. No, you can't.

[Grant Cardone]

None of that would be allowed again. Right, right. So this is. This is. I'm telling you, this is a land grab. This is. Hey, we own this state. We want you to know, Cardone, you don't own that house. You pay for the house, son.

[Adam Carolla]

Right?

[Grant Cardone]

And here's the biggest problem for the people in Indiana, because you might not give a about California. If they can pull this off in California, they can pull this off anywhere. This is the fourth largest economy on planet Earth. If the communists can control California, New York is nothing. And I think that they're. Adam, I think they're making a play at both of them, right?

[Adam Carolla]

Now, what do you think of the whole mamdame thing?

[Grant Cardone]

Yeah, exactly. I'm going to resist them. I went to them and said, guys, I want to put up concrete roof. I want to put concrete siding up and I want to reinforce it with the concrete foundation I have right now will never burn. You will never need to send the fire department over here ever again. Because fire does not take concrete down ever. And they're like, yeah, you need to get a permit, man.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, go through the process.

[Grant Cardone]

I'm like, it can never burn. It will never be at risk to the Malibu fire department again. They're like, no, that's not enough, Mr. Cardone.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, you know, you may. This may explain something. So when I've been going through the Palisades, I've been marveling that they're stick framing these houses. It's two by six, you know, four by eight, plywood, sheathed with plywood. I mean, if you go by. If you go by every single house in the Palisades that's currently under construction and you light a cigarette and you fall asleep on a futon in the state it's in now, it'll burn to the ground again. It is all lumber and it's all dimensional lumber and plywood and OSB and everything. It's sort of shocking to see a structure in a burnt landscape. It looks like the moon and everything is burnt to the ground. And they're building this wooden structure in the middle of the place that the fire just claimed in the same house. And I was screaming, why are they building everything out of wood again? And now it makes sense because that's what they were permitted for before.

[Grant Cardone]

It's insane, dude.

[Adam Carolla]

There isn't one.

[Grant Cardone]

They should expedite, they should reward, they should incentivize.

[Adam Carolla]

Listen, I've talked to guys who build homes that are fireproof homes. They're formed up and they have rebar in them and they pump in the gunite or lightweight concrete walls and blah, blah, blah. It's a science, it's interesting, it's cost effective, it works. And it's bulletproo. When I say bulletproof, it's bulletproof and it's fireproof. And there's none of it. Every single structure is. They dropped off a pile of two by sixes and they're just framing, just like Grandpappy did 100 years ago. And I'm like, it seems weird to build a house out of wood in the same place that the house out of wood just burnt down 10 minutes ago. But that's all they're doing. And there doesn't seem to be an emphasis on fireproofing. And.

[Grant Cardone]

And the crazy thing is it doesn't seem like the population of California is standing up to complain about it. I mean, this was only, what, six months ago?

[Adam Carolla]

Seven months ago, Coming up on nine, but go ahead.

[Grant Cardone]

Nine months. Okay, whatever. Fuck. God damn. How fast you guys forget?

[Adam Carolla]

They're all forgotten about nine months.

[Grant Cardone]

I mean, do you guys have. Is the weed that good in California that y' all forget that quick? Nine months ago, there was a fire. It couldn't be stopped because your tanks were not. Did not have water.

[Adam Carolla]

I know.

[Grant Cardone]

Couldn't get water to the. Like, literally. I had people from my church using glasses of water, buckets of water out of my pool to keep the fire off my house.

[Adam Carolla]

You know, right now there's a bunch of equipment right next to your house, and there's a giant caisson rig there. And there's a whole bunch of stuff in the vacant lot that's next to your home. And I'm like, are they using that to drill caissons? And the answer is no. I think they're staging it. I think your neighbor's, like, renting the city that lot and they're keeping their equipment there for stuff they're doing down PCH in terms of retaining walls and stuff like that on the hillside. I don't know if you saw that or not.

[Grant Cardone]

No, I didn't. I'm getting ready to go back over there. But J. Stein is my next door neighbor, and then next to him is Barbara, who's been there since, I don't know, 1985 or something. She's been there 40 years. Okay. She lost her home insurance, gave her 3 million. I said, Barbara, did you take the 3 million? She's like, yeah, I took it. I said, don't take the check, send it back. You can't rebuild for 3 million. Oh, yeah, I'm going to be able to rebuild. I said, no, you're not going to be able to rebuild. By the time the rebuilding starts, the inflation on labor and materials will be so high that it could cost three or four thousand a square foot to rebuild your home.

[Adam Carolla]

Are these people trying to pull permits and what happened? The whole expedited permit thing, Nothing.

[Grant Cardone]

There's no fast track. There's no fast track process. There's no expediting. There's. There's. The Coastal Commission, by the way, has not been involved, by the way, by the city of Malibu. So, see, the city of Malibu will still have to check With Coastal. Coastal is run by, as you know, 12 people. The Coastal Commission controls 1100 miles of coastline in California. 1100 miles by 12 people that meet 12 times a year.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. Who don't live there and are angry lesbians, but other than that.

[Grant Cardone]

Very angry.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes.

[Grant Cardone]

Well, wouldn't you be.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, isn't there.

[Grant Cardone]

If you were a lesbian, wouldn't you be angry?

[Adam Carolla]

I would.

[Grant Cardone]

Because, I mean, let's keep it real. The pussy gets old and it doesn't get better.

[Adam Carolla]

I agree. So is. So what we do is we put together commissions, and the commission is supposed to be responsible for or expedite or help and assistance, but really all it is is a way for you not to get a permit. And they give them these sort of euphemistic names. They should be called the cock blockers, because they don't. They prevent everyone from building is essentially.

[Grant Cardone]

And they're nice to you. They're nice to you. They say, we will give you one. We're going to meet on this 90 days. And then when you go back, they're like, we had too many to meet on in that 90 days. So there'll be another 90 days. And if you're rich, they figured out how to screw you, because they're like, yeah, Mr. Cardone, you'll get one. It'll be seven years, right?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Grant Cardone]

You can rebuild. You can rebuild. So poor Barbara, by the way, she's not rich. She's been there since 1950 or 1985. She's not rich. She was just in the right place at the right time and bought the house for a couple hundred grand and now cannot. She can't rebuild. And even if she could, she'll be. She'll be 92 years old.

[Adam Carolla]

Now. I. Listen, you know, look, I've said it before, but Alan Hamill and Suzanne Summers lived in Malibu. They were on pch and their place burnt down several years ago. And they loved it, and they wanted to rebuild. And the Coastal Commission was so far up their ass, they just said, you know what? We're old. We can't. You know, it's one thing when you're fresh out of college and you got your hopes and your dreams. It's another thing of when you're in your 70s and your 80s and some bitch of the Coastal Commission tells you it's going to take seven years before the first lumber drop for your rebuild. You can't do it. You fix yourself.

[Grant Cardone]

And if you're rich. If you're rich, Adam, you're like, yeah, I'm not waiting Seven years for anything. I'm going to move to. I'm going to move to Palm Beach, I'm going to move to Miami. I'm going to go to Scottsdale. I'll buy a damn. I'll buy something up in the hills and in the, in Scottsdale for 20 million and I'll live like a king. And that's what people are doing, and I think that's what they want them to do. I think they're actually getting their way.

[Adam Carolla]

So no permits, and then we're going to get into this whole septic system. And is there any thoughts about putting everyone on sewer now that there's this opening, this big septic opening of dropping a sewer line down PCH and getting on to the sewer system versus the septic system?

[Grant Cardone]

Yeah, I don't know, man. You know, because they're gonna replacing telephone poles, so I can't imagine they're going underground with anything.

[Adam Carolla]

You're right there. They didn't bury the wires, which was stupid.

[Grant Cardone]

Where if you, if you guys that live in Indiana, if you drive down the PCH and I told you these are 30, 40, 50, $60 million homes. Like every time I've ever droned, you know, driven through Malibu, I'm like, this, this, this does not look. This looks like a third world country with telephone wires.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes, I agree.

[Grant Cardone]

And why don't they improve it? Why don't they go under? We can't. We can't go underground. I'm like, why not? You have the technology.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. I bet you Elon Musk could figure it out. About 15 minutes. So no permits, no building. I don't know what's going on with Altadena. I traveled through there and I didn't exactly see any building going on in Altadena either.

[Grant Cardone]

Nobody cares about Altadena. And you know why?

[Adam Carolla]

Poor Mexicans. I don't know. Is that what's going on? Yeah, it's. Poor people live there, they don't care. Poor people. I mean, poor people in $1.7 million houses that are underinsured, never going to be able to rebuild. Yeah. So there's a lot of that turn into a park.

[Grant Cardone]

Yeah, they want fewer people in California, I guess.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, I mean, if that's their goal, they got their man with Gavin Newsom. Because somebody tweeted me over the weekend, I think, and I'll just. Off the top of my head, but I think the cost of a U haul from here to Idaho was like 4,500 or five grand. And from Idaho back to LA was like 700 bucks or something like that. Check the prices of the U haul and which way they're going, and that's how you can tell who's leaving and who's staying. So when are you back, Grant?

[Grant Cardone]

I'm scheduled to get back there in a couple weeks. I talked to Elaine the other day. Your friend Elaine, she's like, you should run for. You should run. I said, elaine, stop it.

[Adam Carolla]

She wants you to run for governor.

[Grant Cardone]

If you're not willing to rip the face off of every environmental group, the Coastal Commission, and everyone that votes blue, if you're not willing to rip their face off completely, don't run for anything, okay? Because if you're not going to tell the truth, you have to dismantle all of Sacramento, every environmentalist group and the Coastal Commission. If you can't do that, you're just wasting money. This guy, this guy, this guy. That little dude that's running for the Republican guys. The. Without a. The ball headed guy.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, Steve.

[Grant Cardone]

What's his name?

[Adam Carolla]

Steve. Oh, God, I'll think of it. Yeah.

[Grant Cardone]

You can't even remember his name. God damn it.

[Adam Carolla]

No, I know him. I just got too many names.

[Grant Cardone]

That's how much of an impression he makes.

[Adam Carolla]

Steve Hilton. Steve Hilton. Steve Hilton.

[Grant Cardone]

Look, Steve Hilton. And also to the. To the Sheriff Bianco. You guys want to run, man up and run, run. Run over someone. Tell the truth. Do not try to be friends with the unions. Do not try to be friends with the Coastal Commission. Stand up and tell the people in the state of California the truth. They're robbing the state. They're taking it. They don't want people there. Yeah, you got to get people angry over there to get them to stand up and fight for their state again. Elaine wants to run as the golden. The golden. What did she say? No, the Sunshine Governor. Ain't nobody gonna vote for positive in the state of California, Adam.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, can it. Can we think of it this way? I would look at California like Jay Leno would look like. Look at an old Duesenberg. Like it's got the bones. It's a Duesenberg. It was one time great. And I just gotta get it in the hands of the right restoration guy. Someone who really knows what they're doing. Not someone who's gonna have a bunch of meetings about Duesenbergs or the impact environmentally of a Duesenberg, but like actual dudes who know what they're doing, who can take this Duesenberg. Now, I'm not gonna do this with an old Pinto or a Pacer. But this is. It's got good bones, but it's falling apart. It's rusting out in a vacant lot. If we don't get it into a skilled, competent shop soon, there won't be anything to transport. And you, as a person who's invested in the Duesenberg, should want somebody. And by the way, that person who's restoring the Duesenberg is gonna have. They're gonna say things you don't want to hear. You're gonna go, I want to go get some aftermarket fenders that are stamped out in China. I can get at Pep Boys cheap. And he's gonna go, no, these are gonna have to be made by hand using an English wheel. And then he go, well, how much is that? It's gonna take some time. It ain't gonna be free. But if you want to do it right, we can do it right. And I look at California as the Duesenberg that's rusting out in the vacant lot. It had its prime, no better automobile in the 20s and the 30s, but it was a long time ago. And some hack named Gavin Newsom and Karen Bass and the rest of these idiots, Jerry Brown and the rest of these hack idiots drove the Duesenberg into the ground. And if we don't get somebody skilled and a really good, competent shop, it's going to go. It's just going to be gone.

[Grant Cardone]

I agree, man. You like fighting for. But you need a fighter, you know? You need people to stand up. If enough people registered red over there, it would terrify the Democrats. Like, that's the only thing that could happen. If you could get the. Just Democrats. Just register red and watch them change. You don't even have to vote red. Just register red. They look at those numbers every day. It costs nothing. You don't have to, you know, pull anybody out office. Just register red. And those people will go psycho in Sacramento because they don't want to lose the state. They don't want to lose the funding. It's a great state. But like the old car, you're talking about, the Duchenberg, what is it called?

[Adam Carolla]

Duesenberg.

[Grant Cardone]

Duesenberg. Nobody even knows what that is anymore.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, God damn it. Listen, the. The saying that's a doozy comes from a Duesenberg. Got it. Got it. Yeah. So I'd say you got a doozy of a Malibu house. I'm like saying you got the Duesenbergs of Malibu houses.

[Grant Cardone]

Yeah, well, you got. You got. You got 3 or 4 million houses short there, and they let, like, 3 million people in. So what does that tell you? Like, anybody can do basic math. If you're short 3 million homes, you're the most expensive rental market, the most expensive housing market. You're most expensive on almost everything. You're 3 million homes short, and then you let 3 million people in that don't have homes.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[Grant Cardone]

So now you're 6 million behind.

[Adam Carolla]

It is sad, Grant. Listen, when you get into town, hit me up at the house.

[Grant Cardone]

We should meet at the house, and you can give me the. The Mike Rowe walkthrough.

[Adam Carolla]

Your house is literally 200 yards from my bedroom, and I walk past it all the time. So hit me up when you come back, and I will make up a pot of gazpacho. It's a lovely summertime soup, and I will bring it by and assess your damage.

[Grant Cardone]

We'll take a. We'll take a doozy. Look at it.

[Adam Carolla]

A doozy. Grant Cardone, by the way. Website. Grant Cardone. C, A R, as in car, as in Duesenberg, as in Carola. D, O, N, E. I used to.

[Grant Cardone]

Sell Corollas, by the way. When I got out of college with an accounting degree, I sold Corollas.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, really? Not as.

[Grant Cardone]

My education to becoming a successful businessman was selling Toyota Corollas.

[Adam Carolla]

Solid vehicle. Not a doozy of a car, but not a doozy.

[Grant Cardone]

But, you know, it paid me 200 bucks in commissions, and I learned how to do that.

[Adam Carolla]

Grant, I hope I'll see you in a couple of weeks when you're out here. I'll just walk on by. All right, take care. We'll take a quick break. We'll get back here with Alicia Kraus and do the news right after this. Home Title Lock. Well, if you're a homeowner in America, you need to hear this. There's a new kind of real estate fraud going around. It's called title theft. The FBI's been warning about it. And, yeah, your home and your equity. Well, that's the target. Here's how it works. Criminals forge your signature, use a fake notary, file one document with the county, and on paper, they own your home. They can take out loans against the equity, even sell your property. And you don't find out until notices start showing up in the mail. That's why I partnered with Home Title Lock. They can help protect your equity and tell you today, if you're already a victim, don't wait until it's too late. It's Home Title Lock. Right?

[Show Announcer]

Dawson, go to hometitlelock.com and use promo code Adam. That's hometitlelock.com promo code Adam.

[Adam Carolla]

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[Show Announcer]

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[Dawson]

Ace.

[Adam Carolla]

Man, I was watching the closing credits of the Love Boat. Guess who wrote the theme song? Paul Williams.

[Grant Cardone]

Get it on.

[Show Announcer]

You can leave us a message at 888-634-1744.

[Adam Carolla]

Paul Williams. Yeah, quietly, one of the most interesting guys in show business. Wrote tons of big hit songs. Was in Smoking the Bandit. Ooh. Was also in a bunch of weird Brian De Palma movies. Or at least one called Phantom of the Paradise. He had a really weird, eclectic acting career and then wrote songs for Barbra Streisand.

[Show Announcer]

Did you know he had a songwriting brother as well?

[Dawson]

Interesting.

[Show Announcer]

Mentor Williams wrote Dobie Gray's Drift Away.

[Adam Carolla]

Mentor.

[Show Announcer]

Mentor Williams. Paul's brother.

[Dawson]

So he literally.

[Adam Carolla]

Wow. I didn't know that.

[Show Announcer]

I just found it out a couple days ago.

[Dawson]

Mentored him.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, he was an interesting guy. And for most of his life, he looked like Jodie Foster when Jodie Foster was nine.

[Show Announcer]

Right.

[Adam Carolla]

They had the exact same hair. He looked like 9 year old Jodie Foster his whole. He's a little guy with like bangs and blonde hair.

[Dawson]

I don't know if I find that so funny.

[Adam Carolla]

It's uncanny how much Paul Williams looked like Jodie Foster. But anyway, it's back when guys wore a few hats, you know, back in.

[Dawson]

The day, they had to hustle.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Mac Davis did that. He was, like a songwriter, he was a singer, he was an actor. Like, they had a lot of that back then.

[Dawson]

I actually appreciate that. Like, you want to have a little hustle? No, I want to have somebody that has, like, drive and not, like a jack of all trades. Clearly, he was musically talented, but. Or creatively talented, but, like, lean into that. Do the things. Give it a shot.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm with you, my dear. All right. You got some news?

[Dawson]

I do.

[Adam Carolla]

What do you got?

[Dawson]

Well, did you hear about this Saudi Arabia comedy festival?

[Adam Carolla]

I did, and there was a funny TikTok video. Was I telling you about that, Andrew, I can't remember if I told you fine or something. It's out there. Somebody did a rap song where they were dissing all the comics that went, well. When Andrew finds it, then we'll know it.

[Dawson]

Pete Davidson was one of them, and I'd heard him on a podcast recently where he was straight up asked about it, and he was like, well, they didn't. Singapore asked me not to be too sexual in my act. And he tried to conflate the two.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, I mean, look, I'm not gonna get all high and mighty. They did it for the money. They offered him lots of money.

[Dawson]

So what number would you have to take in order to not talk about how the Saudi royal family likes to kill journalists?

[Adam Carolla]

Well, you know, I did the asphalt convention in Florida once, and they'll tell you, PG 13, not R, I view.

[Dawson]

But PG 13 and not R is very different than in your contractual agreement understanding that you cannot say anything about the government at all.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. So here's.

[Dawson]

Or poke fun at them.

[Adam Carolla]

Here's how stuff works. If you say, hey, Pete Davidson, I'll give you $4,000 to come to the Saudi whatever, go, no, if you go, I'll give you 200 grand. He'll go, all right, but you can't talk about X, Y and Z. And he'll go, can't talk about how.

[Dawson]

The Saudis funded 911 in which his father died.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. But if I said, I'll give you a million bucks, then he'll take the million and not talk about any of the stuff. Do you see what I'm saying?

[Dawson]

Oh, yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Everyone's got a price.

[Dawson]

As a parent, I kind of want somebody to let us know what all these guys got paid. I mean, Bill Burr has defended this, and so has Dave Chappelle. I think the thing that frustrated me the most About Dave Chappelle, though, is that he said, quote, it's easier to talk here than it is in America.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, first off, this thing of, like, every time I turn on CNN and some blowhards back there with an Afro going, you know what it's like to be a black man in America? It's like it seems better than almost anywhere else. Number one, Dave Chappelle. Nobody gets more love than Dave Chappelle.

[Dawson]

From left, right and center.

[Adam Carolla]

Left, right, center, black and white.

[Dawson]

And also, does he not remember, like, when the right came to his defense, when he mentioned and had all those bits about, like, trans people in his standup comedy? And people wanted Netflix, Reed Hastings at the time to ax him. And you had people that were more centrist into the right being like, no, let. Let the number speak for itself.

[Adam Carolla]

His.

[Dawson]

He was number one out of the top 10 on Netflix for what, six weeks running?

[Adam Carolla]

I have the thing. Whether it is Dave Chappelle or whether it's Ilhan Omar or whether it's Trevor.

[Dawson]

Noah, Ilhan probably would have kissed the ring of the Saudis, quite literally. They're her people.

[Adam Carolla]

Being raised as a black person in a country that is better than any other country for this, and then being rich and successful and adored and then doing the woe is me bullshit drives me nuts. It drives me nuts. And the Ilhan Omar, especially when we snatch you out of a shithole and raise you somewhere nice and then you turn on us. It drives me insane.

[Dawson]

I think she would have been finding that shithole, though, because she had family that was warlords over there.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, she did. So if their side, she'd be fine.

[Dawson]

Allegedly. That's what's been reported.

[Adam Carolla]

Everybody who did this did it for money. Okay? And when you start talking about money, people like you watch Dateline or whatever and they tell these stories of like, he hired a contract killer to kill his nine month pregnant fiance. He wanted $3,300 up front and $3,300 bonds. You go, you can get in this country, most people get people killed for way under 10 grand. These guys, I mean, they'll tell you stories. Jon Stewart will tell you stories. Or like some super billionaire wanted me to play his son's bar mitzvah for a million dollars. Wouldn't do it. It's like, I'd do it for a.

[Dawson]

Million bucks because the guy wanted him to say or not say certain things or just because he's like, that's not enough money for me.

[Adam Carolla]

It's just like, I don't do that. There are people that are that way. Now what I'm saying is nobody here got on an airplane for 21 hours for 11 grand.

[Dawson]

They probably sent a private plane and it had a few zeros at the end.

[Adam Carolla]

These guys got paid millions. Some.

[Dawson]

But does that make it okay then? I guess.

[Adam Carolla]

No, it makes it understandable because like I said, let's be honest, and I'm not siding with these people. But I'll give you a straight ahead example. You want to start a company where you make your own custom beach towels.

[Dawson]

Okay. I like a nice Turkish towel or quick dry.

[Adam Carolla]

A nice quick dry. And you want your logo on it and your dog. What's your dog's name?

[Dawson]

Oh, Rip. Mr. Guinness.

[Adam Carolla]

Mr. Guinness. Gone in a better place. But we're going to put a big picture. Mr. Guinness on it and people are going to love it. And then I go to you and I go, okay, I got all laid out, you know, and here's the designs and here's what. And then you go, I want these things made in America. And I go, okay, great. But if they're made in America, each unit is going to be $26.

[Dawson]

Oh, yes.

[Adam Carolla]

Which means you're going to have to sell these beach towels for about $40 each to have any kind of problem now.

[Dawson]

And if you want it to be Maha approved organic cotton with no, there's.

[Adam Carolla]

A place in China. There's a place in China that'll bang these things out for 3.75 a piece and you could sell it for 25 cents. You're gonna have a lot of profit, right? And then all of a sudden, you're not so patriotic anymore.

[Dawson]

You go, ccp ain't so bad now.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm just saying all of us would think about it and that's what. And then many go, let's just go with the Chinese. And that's what these guys do.

[Dawson]

So Your favorite singer JLo also has performed over there. I think she's performed for the Qataris too, despite how horrifically they treat women. And if she was a woman over there, they wouldn't let her shake her ass, but they'd throw her in jail or probably kill her for it under Sharia law. But she didn't go over there and to my knowledge, change her act. I think the thing that frustrates people about Bill Burr and Chappelle is this stick of. Oh, you know, it's not like they're yelling death to America. And by the way, it's easier to do stand up here than it is in America. And it's the false narrative. It's almost as if they are Baghdad Bob.

[Adam Carolla]

Right?

[Dawson]

Remember?

[Adam Carolla]

Sure, I know. Back.

[Dawson]

And so it's like. It's not just like they took the check and did the show. They took the check, they did the show and they're still hawking for the regime.

[Adam Carolla]

I think that's what kind of gets under. My problem with the Bill Burrs and the Chappelles or anybody in general is if you're gonna pitch like Aziz, I'm sorry, if you're gonna pitch woke bullshit here about people and people being oppressed and violence against women and all the shit you throw up every day, spare us when you go over there and take a check. That's the whole thing. If Andrew Dice Clay did it, I'd be like, I mean, if I took the money, then I would take the money. But I'm not railing against oppressive regimes all the time.

[Dawson]

I mean, Aziz was almost canceled by the MeToo movement because a chick that gave him a blowjob then decided a couple years later when a reporter called her that she didn't like that. He then tried to hit her up for sex later in the night when she slept over. And my response to that was like, that's your average marriage. But like, once again, people, libertarians, free, free minded thinkers, like people that were like, hey, let's not conflate like actual rape and abuse to a bad one night stand. Came to his defense. He came back around. Also had a successful Netflix special. It's just like, don't rail on America when America has made you famous and.

[Adam Carolla]

It'S 10 times better than wherever you're going to get a check. That's my whole thing. And I. But, but then there are guys like Mark Norman who I'm looking at, I like, but he's not woke and doesn't rail against America. So I have more forgiveness or more understanding or more something. What I don't like is the rail against oppressive. Trump's an oppressive dictator. We'll go take a check from an oppressive dictator. That's what I like. I have the song, by the way. It's a rap song.

[Dawson]

Oh, nice.

[Adam Carolla]

I just saw it for 10 seconds and I thought, that sounds fun. Yo, it's Billy Burka. Yeah, we get rehab money, baby. It's brutal. Yo, we can react money. We can re Add money. I am a cuck, I got a shitty black and white I am a cuck I got a shitty black and white. It's brutal.

[Dawson]

We can react money.

[Adam Carolla]

Yo, we getting react money now.

[Crack Amico]

That Riyadh money got them selling they souls. If they wasn't telling jokes, they be selling they hoes. They do anything for dollars. Even say a prayer to island balaclavas on their faces just to pack out a show. Whoa, Chris the Stefano. I had to let you know this festival might rest your soul. They called it in the Eskimos. The episodes you drop must not be making no sense. Mr. Ross Only going cause there's no age of consent. Guess the roast master general demoted to looting. I'm the lord of this land. I'm evicting these two tenants who didn't expect Tommy Buns to take the Saudi funds. Probably for a Rolex. He don't give the kids a mommy nun.

[Adam Carolla]

Aziz needs this.

[Crack Amico]

I'm rooting for him in the end. Cuz, how could you get canceled for being a horny Indian? I can't believe what I'm seeing is Pete Davidson made a lot of money, but I guess he ain't been saving none.

[Adam Carolla]

Never forget.

[Crack Amico]

Well, I guess he forgot now he performing for the animals that took out his pops.

[Grant Cardone]

Does he even know?

[Crack Amico]

Does he have.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, you get it. I was like, wow, pretty well crafted rap here. That's by Crack Amico.

[Dawson]

Okay, Crack Amico.

[Adam Carolla]

Crack Amico.

[Dawson]

Maybe you could make one. So comedians like David Cross, Marc Maron, and Shane Gillis, to their credit, have publicly condemned the festival and saying that they wouldn't do it. And another female comedian, Atsuko, had said that she had previously declined the invitation because it included bans on political, religious, and LGBTQ content.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, so Bill Burr said it was.

[Dawson]

Quote, one of the top three experiences he's ever had.

[Show Announcer]

Well, Crack Amico, by the way. Crack Amico, I'm told.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, sorry. Crack Amico. All right.

[Dawson]

Bill Burton never been to the happiest place on earth. That is Disneyland.

[Adam Carolla]

I will say Bill got weird and woke at some point. I don't know what happened, but I.

[Dawson]

Think it was after people like Dave Rubin, our friends Dave and Ben Shapiro went to his comedy show and it was funny. And then he was like, no, no, no. Cannot have conservatives like me must go the other way. And then he went, like, hardcore the other way and started defending Luigi and Mangione.

[Adam Carolla]

That, to me, by the way, even if it's a joke, is sort of despicable stuff. That stuff drives me nuts.

[Dawson]

It wasn't a joke. I mean, it was on his podcast. He was pretty freaking serious.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, okay. I just heard the comment on Kimmel. I didn't hear it on his podcast. There's something broken about that. But anyway, I will say that if you took most human beings and you offered them the amount of money that these guys got paid to do this, almost everyone you know would do it. And you would have to. You hypothetically will go, I wouldn't do it. But when you saw the amount of money, you might do it. So I'm not really judging those. I just don't want to come back.

[Dawson]

Here and shit on America.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm saying to everyone, don't be preachy and take the cash.

[Dawson]

Got it.

[Adam Carolla]

If you want to be Marc Maron and be obnoxious and preachy and not take the cash, I respect that.

[Dawson]

That makes sense. Yeah, I like that.

[Adam Carolla]

And if you want to be Mark Norman and not be preachy and just take the cash, fine. But don't be preachy and take the cat.

[Dawson]

It would have been really funny, though, if, like. So apparently Tim Dillon agreed to it. And then he cracked a joke online about how he couldn't say anything as a gay man in Saudi Arabia. And then they dropped him from the show, which I actually wondered, like, was that his 4D chess of, like, calling them out for it? I don't know, but I wish that, like, he or somebody like, Kill Tony had gone over there and just, like, laid into them. Like, had it been a real roast, that they'd be like. And we'd like to recognize in honorary. Like, in memoriam Kamal Khashoggi. Everyone, let's have a moment of silence.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. I mean, also, to be fair to them, they probably didn't have an act that had a lot of time dedicated to the royal family in general. So it's like if someone said to me, adam, you can go to Sacramento and do a show Wednesday, but no talking about the royal family, I'd be, like, done and done. I'll just be complaining about my own family.

[Dawson]

But if somebody said, hey, Adam, you can come to Sacramento and do a show, but you can't talk shit about gas Gavin Newsom. Right? Like, it's his backyard.

[Adam Carolla]

Ah, man, you got me. See, you're right.

[Dawson]

You. You have more morals than you let on.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, no, I. I didn't do the Only time I. I'm trying to think. Only time I really turned my back on money is when Comedy Central wanted to do a fifth season of the man show without Jimmy. Just me.

[Dawson]

Really?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. He was going to late night, and they kept coming to me offering more and more money each time. Just you do it alone. You could pick any partner you want. You could pick Anyone you want to work with or you just do it alone, but do another season. Yeah. And they kept taking me out to lunch and they kept offering more money. Man, I just wouldn't do it.

[Dawson]

Why?

[Adam Carolla]

I was like, you know, I started the show with Jimmy. Jimmy and I started this show. I think I said that two different ways, but it was the same thing. We did 100 episodes or like 100 plus, and we both kind of agreed that we did what we wanted to do. And it worked and it worked, and that'll be that. And I was like, this is me and Jimmy's show. It's not my show. And I was also going to go with Jimmy to help him start the late night show. And I realized that I was kind of a huggy blanket or something for him. Like, we share an office and stuff like that. He'd probably like me to go with him to help him get things off the ground. He didn't need it, but it was probably. Would have been a nice gesture. And I also kind of. I sort of thought, you know, if I do this without him, it's going to feel a little Benedict Arnoldy or something to him. It's probably not going to be. I don't think he would. I don't think he would have ever.

[Dawson]

I wish he had moved on. It's not like you're like, bye, Jimmy, and then you brought in somebody else.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. You know, people talk to any woman. It's like, you wanted a divorce. Yeah. Now I got a young girlfriend. Yeah. Why are you mad? I don't get it. Yeah, you moved on. But no, they can still be pissed.

[Dawson]

I could see how having been on like a kind of morning show and then on air with multiple people, like, you have to. An old boss of mine was once, like, it's about respect, camaraderie, and rapport. And you guys had that, and you still have that because you're still friends. It's hard for you to just be like, oh, yeah, bring in Ryan Seacrest, teen. I can do the same thing.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, right.

[Dawson]

Like, you. You can't. Or even bring in some Joe Schmo that nobody was aware of that maybe you liked on the comedy circuit. You can't. Like, it's not gonna have that same spark or vibe when it's somebody completely new, not just to the audience, but to you.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. I probably could have made it work because I knew the template and I was there since the inception and I understood the show well and all that. And I've had partners. Jimmy was a partner. But Dr. Drew was a partner. Skip Adel and catch a contractor's partner. I got how to work people and have, like, a good kind of working relationship with them. And so I probably could have done something. Like, it would have been fine. When we left then the producers had to produce the show who never produced the show. And that's why it got bad, because they never produced it. We produced it. We did everything. And so we left. And then the people that were taking credit for producing it actually had to produce it. And then it turned.

[Dawson]

Fell apart.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Cause we were doing it.

[Dawson]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

That's.

[Dawson]

Well, also the talent left too. So it's like the talent and the lack of good production.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, yeah, the talent left, but Joe Rogan and Doug Stanhope took over, and they're both very capable comedic talents. You know what I mean? So they weren't us, but it's not like they got a couple of hacks from the, you know, open mic at the Comedy Store to come in there. They just couldn't capture it.

[Dawson]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

You know what I mean? And there were just two guys got put together.

[Dawson]

I think you see that a lot, like with snl. Right. Like, there's the golden era of snl and then, like, the format doesn't change, but all the comedians that roll through do. And is it like, is it the political aspect of what's happening in the country? Is it the how there's so much entertainment everywhere that people don't just need to tune into one show on a Saturday night? Is it the comedians that are on staff now, like, what kind of makes it work or not work?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Dawson]

It's hard to duplicate something.

[Adam Carolla]

Chemistry is not replicatable.

[Dawson]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

And that we had when we did Loveline as well. It was just two guys, late night radio. It wasn't really the format wasn't the key. It was just sort of. We had a good chemistry, Drew and I. So anyway, be all that as it may, that's the only time I turn my back on a lot of money.

[Dawson]

Well, speaking of a lot of money and dictatorships, have you seen this video that's trending on social media right now about this new bridge in China?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Dawson]

So it, like, turned. So the only thing I could think of is, like, I've been to Lofoten, which is bucket list place to go. You feel like you're in freaking Lord of the Rings and you have to drive around these fjords. And so you just like zigzag. And it takes you a thousand years to zigzag. Apparently it used to take people, like two hours to maneuver through these mountains. And now there's this super bridge that has all of these bells and whistles, and it will take somebody two minutes to get from point A to point B. So I don't know how. Huajiang. The Huajiang Grand Canyon bridge soars about 2,000ft above the river, and it is twice as high as the Royal Gorge Bridge, the highest in the United States, which is about 956ft above the Arkansas river in Colorado. And it's the home to the second highest bridge as well, which is another one I cannot pronounce. Y' all apparently an X user. And then over on TikTok, the people are saying that this bridge is incredible. And a lot of Americans are saying, like, hey, maybe it's time that we take note. Someone posted that would take 50 years in the UK and then get canceled before being completed. Another person said on Staten island, tiny 13 point mile long, overcrowded, with 500,000 residents. There's only one bridge connecting them to Brooklyn, which is one of New York City's four other bureaus.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, okay. I was thinking about this. It's pretty monumental. It's got a little bit of an art deco vibe. It's got a little bit of a Golden Gate Bridge, and it looks like it's sort of loosely modeled on the Golden Gate Bridge. And so I was looking into the Golden Gate Bridge today, and the thing that I thought was incredible was the Golden Gate bridge started in 32 and took four and a half years to build. And then the Hoover dam started in 31 and took five years to build. So we did the Golden Gate Bridge. And essentially the Golden Gate Bridge and Hoover Dam were started in the 30s and finish by the middle of the 30s, if you can picture that world. And then you also think about, like, you know, while people are bragging about finishing this or coming in under budget. So ultimately, you build shit so we can use it.

[Dawson]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

I mean, think how much utility we built the Hoover Dam in 1932 or 31. It was done in five years, and we've been using the shit out of it ever since with all the electricity.

[Dawson]

Like, to my knowledge, we haven't had to, like, replace it or patch any holes.

[Adam Carolla]

No. And we use the shit out of the Golden Gate Bridge. So, like, what I want to say is some of this stuff we should build and use, it should be used. We don't think that way. But the Golden Gate Bridge and the Hoover Dam were all done in under five years, in the 30s. And the technology, they dug everything with steam. They use steam and power.

[Dawson]

I'm actually, I'm most impressed with like the Brooklyn Bridge. I don't know how long it took to build it. We'd have to like Google that real quick. But just the fact that that was a feat at the time, like, of using the cables and the stone, like you said, like, how do we put these pilings in the river? Before it had ever been done before.

[Adam Carolla]

They would have to build little dams. People get the bends going down there when they'd come back up. I mean, it was also a couple Irishmen died along the. Anyway, it's all in the name of progress after all. I mean, so there's a lot of that.

[Dawson]

I'm sure a few Chinese men died building this. The CCP just won't take it. I'm sure in the four years, yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

And a couple on our railroad.

[Dawson]

But the Brooklyn Bridge and the Hoover Dam do not also feature a theme park or a glass skywalk. It has a high speed glass elevator. It's like Willy Wonka and a waterfall.

[Adam Carolla]

All I'm saying is, wouldn't it be nice to build stuff? Like, wouldn't it be good? It wouldn't be a good thing to build stuff. Like we could build stuff. We can do it, but we won't allow ourselves to do it.

[Dawson]

We're focused on building AI and then the factories that have to hold all of the things to like, you know.

[Adam Carolla]

I mean, it's a California thing for sure, but you couldn't build shit in California. I literally remember where I was sitting in high school in Ms. Valdivia's class, looking out the window in like 1982 when somebody was talking about, you know, they're gonna build a high speed rail from Los Angeles to Las Vegas.

[Dawson]

Yeah, I've been here for 13 years and I've been hearing that too.

[Adam Carolla]

They're gonna go high speed from Los Angeles to Las Vegas. I drove from Las Vegas yesterday. There is no high speed rail. There's just a road that gets shitty once you make it into California.

[Dawson]

And that's the one that makes the most sense. Like why do we need to go up to Fresno or Bakersfield? The train, like put a train from like the Valley in LA and then downtown LA to Vegas. Like you can gamble and drink the moment you cross into Nevada. It makes the most sense.

[Adam Carolla]

But here's the whole thing. We get nothing. We can't do anything.

[Dawson]

We can't have nice things.

[Adam Carolla]

We can, because we're so mobbed up with The Coastal Commission. I just talked to Grant Cardone about this, but, I mean, it's like, in what world are you going to get to build a train in California? It's not going to work. They can't do anything. They have been building from Bakersfield to Merced for.

[Dawson]

Is it eight years now?

[Adam Carolla]

No, it seems like eight years. It's been like 17 years or something.

[Dawson]

Oh, God.

[Adam Carolla]

We have nothing. Yeah. I mean, again, let's see. Let's have some fun. You ready?

[Dawson]

Okay.

[Adam Carolla]

Golden Gate Bridge, four and a half years. Hoover Dam, five years. Combine nine and a half years.

[Dawson]

In the 30s.

[Adam Carolla]

In the 30s, nine and a half years for both those projects to be completed, although they were building them simultaneously, so. But the whole point is, we've been working on that train for more than nine and a half years, and we have nothing. What year did the train. It was pitched early, but, like, when did they really.

[Dawson]

I thought it was years.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, let's see.

[Dawson]

So we Approved it in 2008. Dumb propositions that everybody votes yes on when they should be voting no, right? Am I allowed to say that?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Dawson]

Okay, so vote no on 52. Guys. Come on. Federal stimulus funds. Oh, great. Got state funds in 2008, federal funds in 2010. In 2013, construction contracts were awarded. In 2015 was the initial groundbreaking.

[Adam Carolla]

All right. I beat you by half a year, though.

[Dawson]

Wow. 2015.

[Adam Carolla]

Exactly what I said. I'd love to know what month it might be. Exactly nine. That's the same. We have nothing. We will get nothing. And even if we did, what would be more impactful in your life? All the electricity generated from the Hoover Dam and. Or the use of the Golden Gate Bridge versus a line 109 miles long from Merced to Bakersfield that you would never. Ranking no one you would know would ever get on that train.

[Dawson]

So, number one, Golden Gate Bridge. Number two, Hoover damage. Number 30 in the train.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. Even. Even if we did complete it, no one would utilize it.

[Dawson]

I've gone across the Golden Gate Bridge, like, three times in three. Four times in my life. Three. Because actually, one time I took a ferry and then I drove over. Okay, three times. If I'm being honest. That's more. That's three times more than I will ever take that train.

[Adam Carolla]

I've. I've never. I would never take that train. Brooklyn Bridge took 14 years, by the way. 1869.

[Dawson]

Right. Though, like, when you hear that. 1869.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Dawson]

And what the feet. Like, the engineering feat of that. It's fascinating.

[Adam Carolla]

Agreed.

[Dawson]

I watched a documentary on it once on the History Channel with my grandfather.

[Adam Carolla]

Nice.

[Dawson]

It was a long time ago, though.

[Adam Carolla]

That's some homeschooling right there, bro. That's what you do at home? No, I was just sit on Pappy's lap. Let me show you about a bridge.

[Dawson]

That was my math and science for the day. Something.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, so we're idiots. We have nothing. China. Wait, how long did it take China to build one? Four years.

[Dawson]

Four years, Right.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay, they can do something.

[Dawson]

Park and a glass elevator. Like you're in Willy Wonka.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, we can't have things. We can't do things.

[Dawson]

Okay, but they haven't told us how many workers died.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, here's my thing. I don't know why it's not bothersome to people that we can't build things or do things. It tries to.

[Dawson]

Because everybody only cares about this being built in China as well. And so they can sit on this all day long.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm only laughing because in the 15, 16 years I've done this podcast, every single person that comes in, they'll go, you know what's ruining the kids? This. And then I go, it's a podcast. You have to say, phone. Sorry, you've joined the pantheon of greats. I don't care. Nobody can do it.

[Dawson]

Coming from a radio background, I should have known better.

[Adam Carolla]

But that's all right.

[Dawson]

But my mom watches on YouTube.

[Adam Carolla]

We get a lot of YouTube traffic. People love your news on YouTube, so you're right. All right, so there is something weird, though, about the phone, where everyone just describes to hold it up, and they go this. Because you never go the phone.

[Dawson]

Have you seen that trend? It trended a few months ago on Instagram and TikTok. And it was like, you take a parent and then you take their kid, and then you have them do hand motions for different things. And the phone was one of them. And kids would hold out their palm as if it was an iPhone or touch phone. And I don't know who owns droids, but okay. And then the, like, millennial parents like myself would take, like, the thumb and the pinky and, like, pull it up.

[Adam Carolla]

Ah, right? What they do for roll the window down.

[Dawson]

That too. That was one of the ones that they did, too. So some millennial parents would do, like, the actual rolling the window down with the handle, like in my grandpa's old Ford. And then, you know, I don't even know if kids these days know how to roll down a window.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't think anyone gestures to roll down a window anymore, because it's sort of unnecessary. There used to be a lot of directions and there was a lot of car to car communication. Like, there was a lot of, like, you'd go to that thing and they go, your trunk's unlatched. You know, like that. We passed a lot of information.

[Dawson]

Your gas flap.

[Adam Carolla]

Your gas flap. The flap on the gas is up. Like, there's a lot of car to car communication. No, not. Not anymore.

[Dawson]

Not anymore.

[Adam Carolla]

No. We used to do a lot of communicating.

[Dawson]

Everybody's, like, in their car with their carplay listening to you on Spotify or wherever they get their podcasts.

[Adam Carolla]

The Mr. Microphone commercial guy's like, hey, good looking, I'll be back to pick you up in an hour. And in that commercial, they were driving a Mercedes 450 convertible, two seat. I'm so, you know what could have been a 380. There's already like five people inside of a two seater. So I don't know how many more people are going to get in there. But Anyway, that was Mr. Microphone.

[Dawson]

Ah, the good old days.

[Adam Carolla]

Mr. Microphone. You know, the best part about Mr. Microphone is it was like, you know, Mr. Microphone was great because Mr. Microphone all. Whenever they sell something, they always push it a little too far. They go. Kids parties, and they go up there, hey, I'm on the radio. And they're like, all right, I'll buy that.

[Dawson]

For those of you listening and not watching on YouTube, Adam just attempted to dance.

[Adam Carolla]

I dance. And then they would go. And, you know, the guy'd go down the street, hey, I'll be back to. And then they super racistly had a black guy just scatting. He was just. He had a boombox and a Mr. Microphone. He was just going down the neighborhood.

[Dawson]

The only reason I know about this commercial is because of your liberal friend Brian Whitman.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, he loves it.

[Dawson]

He loved this ad.

[Adam Carolla]

But that's fine. Black guy scatting guy in the Mercedes, Fine. Kids party, great. But at the end, they go, even the professionals can use it. It's a woman playing flamenco guitar at an event. It's like, okay, you don't have Mr. If you pulled up to play my wedding or my fundraiser or my gala with Mr. Microphone, I would not think of you as a serious performer. Dawson, you've been on stage. Has ever been with a band that had Mr. Microphone up there 100% of the time? Always. Always.

[Dawson]

That just speaks to the quality of the.

[Adam Carolla]

No.

[Grant Cardone]

Even at the lowest. Even at the lowest, Nobody would ever do this.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, well play. Yeah, you'd have your own system, I would guess. All right, this Christmas party is getting a little too quiet. I think it's time we liven it up with my favorite Christmas gift, Mr. Microphone. Hey, what's that? Well, you set the dial on your FM radio and testing, testing. These kids are having a fabulous time with Mr. Microphone. The cordless microphone that actually puts your voice on the radio. There are no attaching wires, so you're free to move around. Broadcast over any FM car radio. Hey, good looking, we'll be back to pick you up later. You can broadcast in mono or with radio. Professional entertainers use Mr. Microphone for rehearsing. Oh, for rehearsal. Well, wait a minute.

[Show Announcer]

She was performing.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay. Fun for the whole family. And for only 1288. They rich really make great Christmas gifts. Yeah, the perfect Christmas gift at Walgreens, Woolworth, Wilco, Osco Venture, Weibo, Montgomery Ward, Montgomery Warts. Yeah. Mr. Microphone, Blackbeard, Scatty.

[Show Announcer]

And also, that's not how stereo works.

[Grant Cardone]

You don't just put it on a.

[Adam Carolla]

Whole bunch of radios. Well, also, the guy, the guy's like, hey, I'm on the radio. It's like you didn't get the morning show at kroc. You are on a radio that has now become a speaker for your shitty voice. You're not on the radio.

[Dawson]

The cat call via the radio in the Mercedes.

[Adam Carolla]

Now that's a two seater that already had five people.

[Dawson]

Yeah. Including some chicks already. So you drop those chicks off and then come back for.

[Adam Carolla]

The other day, she was not happy that Willie Ames wanted to hit on the chick that was just walking down the street. I gotta say, that's a young Willie Ames. That's what he looks like to me. Yeah. And then the black guy was singing Jingle Bell. He was.

[Dawson]

They're all singing Christmas music. You know why?

[Adam Carolla]

Because black people love the. Oh, no.

[Dawson]

In 1978, they still didn't have to pay for the licensing.

[Adam Carolla]

We'll be back to pick you up later.

[Dawson]

Oh, yeah, you can broadcast tomorrow.

[Adam Carolla]

Or with two more radios in stereo. Professional entertainment.

[Dawson]

It's kind of dangerous. He was splashing around the plugged in radio.

[Adam Carolla]

I love it that, by the way. I love that. I love that they have nine year olds watching Flumet. Like, hey, nine year olds, you want to go to a bouncy castle or do you want to hear flamenco guitar?

[Show Announcer]

She's doing a pretty classy rehearsal there. All dressed up really nice with the audience.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Dawson]

Oh, man, those haircuts.

[Adam Carolla]

The black guy was singing Christmas songs.

[Dawson]

No, they're all singing the family was singing.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, that could have been Christmas. Black guys rarely sing about Christmas. Let's see. Oh, yeah. There are no attaching wires, so you're free to move around, broadcast over any FM car radio. Now let's go full circle, right? This guy in the 60s, could have been part of the Black Panther movement, could have been part of the resistance. Was never going to sell out to whitey. But then at some point in 1977, someone went, I'll give you $10,000 to do a Mr. Microphone conversion and went, gimme that. See how it works.

[Dawson]

Not the same as Saudi Arabia, though.

[Adam Carolla]

Nah, maybe not. But this guy sold out.

[Dawson]

Oh, Lord.

[Adam Carolla]

Mr. Microphones Getting Away. I don't know if we had a fm. I don't know if I had a radio, this stuff.

[Dawson]

You didn't have a radio as, like, a kid?

[Adam Carolla]

Well, I got a clock radio for Christmas once.

[Dawson]

What did you have it set to? To wake you up for school days.

[Adam Carolla]

We had KMET out here and we had a station before Kmet. Something. It wasn't 100, it wasn't K Earth, it was. God. There was like a pop station and then it went sort of KMET and then it was KLS and then it was Kroc. Like you kind of graduated up through. But Mr. Microphone wouldn't have been tolerated at the Corolla house because remember, Dawson, the simple rules. If it brings pleasure or takes batteries, it is not allowed in the Corolla house.

[Dawson]

Oh, my husband rule about the latter.

[Adam Carolla]

This is. This took batteries and brought pleasure. Uh oh. Oh, I see where you're going here. O'Reilly Auto Parts. Yeah, these guys keep your car on the road and you don't want to end up stuck on the shoulder like some sort of dope. Friendly, helpful service. People actually know their stuff. Not just some kid who'd rather be on his phone. These guys are knowledgeable. You go in there and you ask for a part behind the counter and they know what you're talking about, which you don't see in the big box places these days. Thousands of parts and accessories stocked in store or online so you don't have to panic when the check engine light appears. Need wipers swapped, brake lights out. Also, they can help you find somebody to do the job. If you're not one of these DIY types, they'll point you in the right direction. So whether you're a gearhead or you don't know a lug nut from a donut, they all walk you right through it and take care of you. No Attitude, just real help. Stop by O'Reilly Auto Parts today or visit us at O'ReillyAuto.com Adam that's O'ReillyAuto.com.

[Commercial Voice]

Adam this October, Fear is free on Pluto TV with horror movie collections from Paranormal Activity, the Ring, you will die.

[Dawson]

In seven days Scream.

[Commercial Voice]

And from dusk till dawn, this is.

[Grant Cardone]

My kind of place.

[Commercial Voice]

And don't miss the man made nightmares in Mary Shelley's Frankenstein or the world ending chaos in 28 days later, something in the blood, all the scares, all for free. Pluto TV stream now pay never.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. All right. We got another story. Do we get to.

[Dawson]

We do. So there is a mayoral race happening up in Seattle.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, this guy.

[Dawson]

And over the weekend, there was a debate. And at the debate, one of the moderators there for Fox 13 in Seattle said, quote, FBI statistics have shown that in 2024, Seattle had the fourth highest overall crime rate compared to other large cities. The crime numbers this year overall seem to be on a better path than last year. But she asked the Democratic mayor who's currently seated and wants to win again. It's no secret that repeat offenders are driving much of the crime as the city too lacks on repeat offenders. And here is his ingenious response.

[Adam Carolla]

The criminal system has had a disparate impact on black and brown communities. Let me lead with that. So when this person is committing six or seven crimes, I don't know his or her story. Maybe they were abused as a child. Maybe they're hungry. So my, my remedy is to find their life story to see how we could help first. I have no desire to put them in jail, but I need to protect you.

[Grant Cardone]

And that's the calibration that we have.

[Adam Carolla]

The.

[Dawson]

So what's he gonna do to protect me? What is this, like, Les Mis?

[Adam Carolla]

He's gonna sit down. He's gonna sit down and figure if they're hungry and then he's gonna get their life story and their bio and see if they were deprived of Mr. Microphone as a youth like I am and still angry.

[Dawson]

Listen, listen, this is my problem with politics in America is you have somebody like that, that I think he's a, he's a fake empath. But that's another conversation for another day. They, they are empathetic. And I think that they do care about, like, people's story and their, where they came from and their lived, lived experience, you know, all the words that they use. And then people on the right are just like, how do we fix this immediate problem? And I think that actually both left and right should Come together and be like, their story does matter, but we can't fix that after they've murdered somebody on the streets of Seattle. So let's work on getting that guy behind bars and going into the community from which he was raised and trying to fix that community at the ground level too. Like, can we do both?

[Adam Carolla]

I would be much more apt to listen to any of these sort of race hustling bullshit artists if they said this impacts the black and brown community. The African American communities impacted disproportionately when it comes to incarceration because their dads are absent at such a high level that there's more criminality in that community. And we should look at ways to see if we can repair that to prevent them forever getting to the pipeline that takes them from the school to the prison. If they ever said that, then I would go, I now agree with that person. Why? You know, they go, this 13 year old running the streets of Chicago at 4 in the morning and firing guns at a cop, now he's killed, he's dead. It's like, okay, what 13 year old is running around with a gun at 3 in the morning in the streets of Chicago? And the answer is one, whose dad isn't at home? If you cowards ever wanted to address that, I would get on your side. But you won't ever address that because you feel like that's your constituency and you'll lose their vote. So you just talk about how the system impacts them. Well, yeah, if you commit the lion's share of the violent crime, then you will be the lion's share of the prisoners. That's how that works. By the way. It's a two way street. There's not a lot of Jews incarcerated because they have a disproportionately low amount of violent crime that they engage in. So whoever engages in the most crime shall be the most represented in prisons.

[Dawson]

Unless you're in Seattle and he just wants to sit down and hear your story.

[Adam Carolla]

That's right. Because you may be hungry. We don't know if this person's hungry.

[Dawson]

Well, it turns out you get three square meals a day in prison.

[Adam Carolla]

But the other thing, these guys are, and they never really cop to it, but they are racist. And the reason they're racist is when you hear him say things like you hear the mayor or the governor of Chicago or Illinois say, when you put these National Guard troops on the ground, it can scare and agitate some of these people and they'll act out, or this guy's hungry and he's acting out. Or this guy is upset and he's acting out, or he feels scared or fearful so he lashes out. It's like, that's how zookeepers talk about animals. That's not how you talk about human beings.

[Dawson]

Yeah, you go, or a toddler, you.

[Adam Carolla]

Go, who put the. So you go, an alligator ate another peacock. And then you go, the zoo people goes, they don't go, what's wrong with the alligator? They go, who put the alligators in with the peacocks? Like that's really what they're doing. You get Pritzker talking about, if seeing someone in a uniform agitates you, upsets you to the point where. Point where you have to then throw a punch or bottle at that person. And you now are talking about animals at this point. And anybody, any woman whose dog. You know, the number one answer for dog biting somebody is he was scared. He thought you were. He didn't know. He thought you were here to attack me. Like you walk into a woman's house, you know, to drop something off. He's got a little yappy dog and the dog nips at you. And then a woman always goes, goes, oh, he thought you meant me harm. Or he was scared. It's always he's scared. They talk about their cities like you talk about a pet. They're agitated and they're scared. And you coming in makes them upset and it agitates them. And then they lash out because they can't help it.

[Dawson]

They're lashing out as in their fault. It's your fault.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, you put the alligators in with the peacocks and the little shih Tzu was scared. That's how they talk about, this guy's a fucking racist.

[Dawson]

You could also say like, like as a woman, we get the, well, what was she wearing Argument.

[Adam Carolla]

Right? That's what this is. He was hungry.

[Dawson]

And I thought that the left wasn't for that argument. And yet they use it all the time.

[Adam Carolla]

But also, this guy's a world class dope. And by the way, people get killed because of your dopey ass policy. And it's on you at a certain point, all your goodwill.

[Dawson]

He said he didn't quite understand the question, that he didn't believe the FBI stats. FBI stats that came out, I think prior to. Yeah, it was prior to Trump, like even being in office.

[Adam Carolla]

He didn't understand the question. Post when he got into trouble or.

[Dawson]

Yeah, he called the question interesting and noted that he was not exactly sure how to answer and he didn't understand the use of the word lax. And then he gave that shitty response.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, like laxative in that case.

[Dawson]

But look, how does he get paid? Like, should I go up and run for mayor of Seattle? It's a pretty sleep.

[Adam Carolla]

Is he like affirmative action DI hire? Like, is he like half Eskimo or something? And they're like, oh, we gotta get one of these.

[Dawson]

Seattle's such a pretty city. Like it deserves better.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, he's a dope number one. Also. It's basically, it's simple. You don't know anyone who's a violent criminal. It's a very small percentage of people doing repeat. It's a very. It's a super small.

[Dawson]

Yeah. And when you're canceled, when you don't impeach them, they come back to it again.

[Adam Carolla]

And so it's this little group of people causing all the problems. So just get the little group incarcerated and check into the life and the dads and the home.

[Dawson]

Yeah, so.

[Adam Carolla]

But they never do that. They just stop. They go, this impacts the African American. Would you like to know why? Or is it just everything is just a racist cop? Even though I don't even know. It's rare that I see a white cop in la. Tons of women and tons of everything else. Bruce Harrell, the retard, is running Seattle. And that's why all these places are turning to shit. Sad. Because. Yeah, used to go there and enjoy it. Is he something? What is his. I wonder what he is. He looks something, but I don't know. I don't know what that is.

[Dawson]

You're not allowed to say that.

[Show Announcer]

Dad is black, mom is Japanese.

[Dawson]

Oh.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, really? Oh, good. We'll vote for him. He must have the answers. Dad is black and mom is Japanese. Good. We haven't had one of them. That'll be the first black Andese we've ever voted in. And then we can all pat ourselves on the back and he can be retard. He does a shitty job. But I bet you don't. Look, I know Seattle. They're not just gonna get a white guy and put him in there. They gotta get a blackening east in there and put him in. All right, you got one more.

[Dawson]

Oh, yeah, Your favorite gal over on msnbc. Well, I guess the ex host on. Over on msnbc, Joy Reid went on a profanity laced tirade against Vice President J.D. vance, calling him a racist. A hole. Here we go.

[Joy Reid]

I will start by saying, JD Van, since you're paying attention to me, fuck you. And I say that on behalf of every Black woman who heard you call Kamala Debbie Harris the trash. You calling a woman whose mother came to this country to do cancer research and to try to cure cancer, who lost her mother, you know, a few, many, you know, not that many years ago, whose mother is the same exact racial identity as your wife. The fact that you would stand in front of a crowd of mainly white magas and call that woman who was the vice President of the United States, the highest elected female politician, political official in our nation's history, call her the trash for his.

[Adam Carolla]

Hold on, pause it. Was she elected? I mean, didn't they say we need a black chick to be vice president?

[Dawson]

Well, technically she was elected because on the ballot it says Biden Harris. That's like Bush Cheney. Cheney was elected Vice President of the United States.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, but it's weird. I always just think of him as. I think of Bush as being elected and then you tap your, like the.

[Dawson]

Guy or the gal.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, well, I mean, Trump was elected and Mike Pence came along for the ride. I guess. I know. Okay, elected. All right.

[Joy Reid]

Like, fuck you forever. There's nothing you could ever say that I would take as advice, friendly or otherwise. I don't need advice from you. You need to learn how to be a decent human being. And you need to apologize to Kamala Harris for what you said. So let's start with that. The second thing is, J.D. vance, I did not say that my mother said this country was not a land of opportunity for people like us. You need to go back and listen to the interview. What I probably said, I would have to pull up the interview. But what I will say again is that my mother came to this country as an immigrant and believed in the sales pitch of what America says, that it is that it calls itself this sort of land of opportunity.

[Adam Carolla]

Right?

[Joy Reid]

But what happens is, if you are black, you immediately come here and it isn't long before you are treated the same way that America treats all of its black citizens, as second class citizens. As people who need to, quote, unquote, be grateful for white people apparently giving them opportunity. See, in your statement, you forget the part that you believe for yourself that white people earn their opportunities, that they create opportunity, that when they get a good job or get a big house or get a good salary, it's because they earned it. You, because you are a racist, believe that black people are given opportunity by white people. So you can't accept that my mother, who became a Ph.D. holding college professor, earned her opportunity to be a professor. You think that someone white gave her that opportunity or that she stole it from or you know, Charlie Kirk's version is she stole it from somebody white.

[Adam Carolla]

Physically took the diploma and like ran.

[Dawson]

So that rant, by the way, over on Substack was in response to JD Vance talking about her on X. He said, quote, joy Reid has had such a good life in this country. It's been overwhelmingly kind and gracious to her. She is far wealthier than most, yet she oozes contempt. My honest, non trolling advice to Joy Reid is that you'd be much happier person if you just showed a little gratitude. It is kind of ironic that her hat says petty.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, well, a little gratitude is the key to happiness.

[Dawson]

Act happy, be happy, says our buddy Dennis Prager.

[Adam Carolla]

There is a clip that Andrew can find. It's in Love and Death. And you've not seen this movie? No, it's a Woody Allen movie. Okay, it's his funniest movie, but it's forgotten. People don't see it. They've seen many other Woody Allen movies. But Love and Death is his funniest movie. And somewhere Diane Cannon is married to a herring merchant and there's a sort of middle of the movie where they're at her home and all this guy does is talk about herring. That's all he does. And he bores everyone to death with his herring talk. And then I realize she does that, but with race, every time she opens her mouth, it's something about white people and black people and you don't think and you chose from and we invented and then you took. It's gotta be a bizarre way to go through life, to just everything's through the filter of race. Every time a microphone heats up, it's something with race in 2025, when no one gives a shit and you're fine and you're rich. Like everything has to be seen through the filter of race.

[Dawson]

And it's like to say that J.D. vance was saying that black people get handed things by white people. I didn't read that anywhere in his quote.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't know who said that.

[Dawson]

It's like she made up the thing that he said.

[Adam Carolla]

I will replace. Just think about her speaking and just sort of replace race with herring. And that'll be Joy Reid's raison debt. Here we go. Naturally, the war affects the herring industry.

[Grant Cardone]

The ports are blockaded and fresh shipments.

[Adam Carolla]

Of the herring become more difficult to obtain. And of course, when something hurts herring, it hurts me.

[Grant Cardone]

You see, what people don't understand is that there are hundreds of types of Herring.

[Adam Carolla]

Each with its own interesting history.

[Grant Cardone]

Sonia, are you okay?

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, yes, but I've talked long enough. Why don't you two play as I have got some important business to attend to. I can't believe it's like, dear, that's his lover. All that guy does is talk about herring.

[Dawson]

She looks so pretty and young there.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, that's what the 60s were for.

[Dawson]

But that was her lover with those teeth.

[Adam Carolla]

That is Joy Reid with race.

[Dawson]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

Whatever he does, he. That guy's character just talked herring and bore the out of everybody.

[Dawson]

It's like, it kind of like the. We don't want the comedians to go to Saudi Arabia and then come back and on the United States because it's like, no, you've made your bed, lie in it. Like, you can't say we're horrible after going and taking money from the royal family over there. It's almost like, do we keep talking about Joy Reid talking about race? Like, is J.D. vance feeding into. I have this theory about AOC too. Like, would AOC be such a thing if people in conservative media didn't talk about her all the time? Like, maybe J.D. vance should just start ignoring Joy Reid so then we don't have to talk about Joy Reid talking about race all the time.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. Cuz there's nothing else to her.

[Dawson]

Exactly. That's her shtick. And it's only her shtick because she can rant and curse out the Vice President of the United States. Which also just goes to show that Dave Chappelle. Pretty dang easy to speak freely here in the United States compared to Saudi Arabia.

[Adam Carolla]

Because I do. I know. I always love the tyrannical dictator thing. Cuz you start talking shit into a microphone, even Mrs. Microphone about a tyrannical dictator, and you get rounded up pretty fast if there's actual tyrannical dictators or if you tweet.

[Dawson]

Something in the uk.

[Adam Carolla]

That's right. All right, I am gonna be at Rodney's in New York doing stand up and a live pod there. And Kat Timf's gonna join me and also Dr. Drew Will for the pod. And. And Drew, for the first time ever, is going to try stand up.

[Dawson]

What?

[Adam Carolla]

Four minutes of stand up.

[Dawson]

I might need to fly out for that one.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Then Sol Joel's in Pottstown, Pennsylvania. That'll be October 10th and 11th. Just go to amcro.com for all the live shows. Alicia, where do we find your columns?

[Dawson]

Sorry, Washington Examiner.

[Adam Carolla]

The op ed on the Washington Examiner. So until next time, I'm Furlice Krause. And Grant Card own Sam Mahala.

[Show Announcer]

You can leave us a voicemail at 888-634-1744 and you can get tickets to see adam [e-mail].

[Commercial Voice]

This October fear is free on Pluto TV with horror movie collections from Paranormal Activity the rare you.

[Dawson]

Will die in seven days Scream and.

[Commercial Voice]

From dusk till dawn this is my kind of place and don't miss the man made nightmares in Mary Shelley's Frankenstein or the world ending chaos in 28 days later. Something in the blood, all the scares all for free. Pluto TV Stream now pay Never.

[Adam Carolla]

This.

[Commercial Voice]

October fear is free on Pluto TV with horror movie collections from Paranormal Activity.

[Dawson]

The rare you will die in seven.

[Commercial Voice]

Days Scream and from dusk till dawn.

[Adam Carolla]

This is my kind of place and.

[Commercial Voice]

Don'T miss the man made nightmares in Mary Shelley's Frankenstein or the world ending chaos in 28 days later. Something in the blood, all the scares all for free. Pluto TV Stream now pay never.