Adam Carolla Show — “Greg Fitzsimmons + Dave Dameshek” (Carolla Classics)
Episode Date: August 24, 2025
Guests: Greg Fitzsimmons, Dave Dameshek, Steve Hofstadter, David Wild, Allison Rosen, Bald Bryan
Summary by [Your Name]
Episode Overview
This episode of The Adam Carolla Show is a “classics” edition, featuring highlights from past shows, including appearances by comedian Greg Fitzsimmons, NFL/sports commentator Dave Dameshek, writer David Wild, and comedian Steve Hofstadter. Accompanied by longtime contributors Allison Rosen and Bald Bryan, Adam Carolla leads the crew through quintessential segments showcasing the show’s signature blend of unscripted humor, pop culture riffs, candid relationship talk, rants about daily life, and irreverent debates. Topics span everything from bathroom etiquette and show business anecdotes to marriage dynamics and sports minutiae.
Key Discussion Points & Highlights
1. Rear-Endings, Bathroom Etiquette, and Social Gripes
[01:45–10:50]
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Allison shares a story about getting rear-ended on the way to the show: Apologetic driver, no major damage, but she regrets not checking.
- Adam’s take: "Try to explain this to white folk who live in decent neighborhoods who are under 65... This is the way whitey dies… You get a flat tire, you get out of your car at night, you're off by the side of the freeway, and you get killed." (02:19)
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Conversation pivots to etiquette around minor public accidents ("no harm, no foul") and how people overreact to simple human errors in public places (airplane aisles, streets, etc.).
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Restroom etiquette: Adam grumbles about people who barge into bathrooms without waiting for a response (“knock and walk”), with both male and female perspectives offered (“the tune-out walk,” tampon anecdotes, and the universal fear of being caught in a compromising moment).
- Greg Fitzsimmons quips: “Am I the only one who got turned on when Allison said she was rear-ended and then a woman said she tapped her?” (03:30)
2. Dr. Drew, Passive Aggression, and Annoyance in Relationships
[13:10–23:00]
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Adam’s recurring peeve: Dr. Drew's chronic habit of making noise (clanking mugs, moving mics) during recordings, despite being asked not to. Adam posits that Drew subconsciously likes being yelled at and seeks out “the dance.”
- “I've given him the motherfucking coffee mug speech 271 times…” (14:49)
- "Drew likes to be yelled at. Oh, wow. So does Dr. Bruce." (17:04)
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*Discussion broadens to the dynamics of cohabitation and the myth of being “scared” of confrontational partners. Adam asserts that real fear causes behavioral change—if Lynette (his wife) really feared him, she’d never leave a dirty mug.
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Universal question: “Is there anyone for whom you have such overwhelming milk of human kindness that you don't get annoyed by anything they do?”
- Adam: “No, Jimmy [Kimmel] does not. But I don't live with Jimmy. ... My writing partner, Kevin Hench ... he's Johnny on the spot ... there's just no bullshit with that guy ... hyper vigilance disorder as well.” (21:19–21:28)
3. Award Show Hosts, LL Cool J & Celebrity Turns
[27:14–29:36]
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Grammy Nomination Concert preview: David Wild mentions LL Cool J as the perennial host.
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Running joke about LL Cool J being inserted into history as the default host for all events.
- “I really do think, like, if you would like to do an award show and not have LL Cool J host it, you need to get a special permit.” (27:26, Adam)
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Conversation veers into award-show fatigue, the rotating door of celebrity hosts, and the odd stability of LL Cool J as Mr. Reliable.
4. Pop Music vs. Real Talent: Lady Gaga, Robin Thicke, Miley Cyrus
[29:31–37:53]
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Adam is skeptical about “talent” in modern pop stars: Wonders aloud if Robin Thicke is genuinely talented or just “the guy with the sunglasses who nails all the hot ladies.”
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Greg Fitzsimmons: Defense of Robin Thicke’s real skills, but concedes that overproduced pop often swamps true talent.
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Lady Gaga as an “example of an artist hurt by production”:
- “Her records are her trying to keep up ... swamped her talent ... she could make a great record just sitting at a piano and singing a song. But she hasn't done it ...” (32:55–33:17, Greg)
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Radio formats as protection for mediocre talent:
- Adam: “There is a format that is built around morning radio that says: I will protect you... how many truly funny people do you know?”
- Greg: “There are only two guys in radio history… I would change my plans to listen to: you and Stern.” (35:04)
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Adam distinguishes between performers who are “good at being themselves” (like talk-show hosts) and those who excel as chameleonic actors—insisting the former is what makes for great broadcasting.
5. Thanksgiving Tangents: Food, Tupperware, and Jello
[105:21, 151:56–154:11]
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Adam rails against “cranberry chutney” disguised as cranberry sauce: “You shall not get cranberry sauce. This is gonna taste like something out of an Indian joint.” (109:14)
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Sheds light on how the language of food is misused and how default expectations are violated (e.g., club sandwiches, eggs).
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The gang debates side dishes: Jello as an inexplicable grownup food at Thanksgiving, stuffing's tragic absence from menus year-round.
- Dave: “The best Thanksgiving side dish is easily stuffing, right? … Why save stuffing for Thanksgiving? It's delicious.” (154:32–154:42)
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Old-school Tupperware nostalgia: “It was that valuable currency. ... Three pieces, so fucking cloudy, light would not pass through them … Grandma would meet me at the door ... you could not take said Tupperware out of the house. ...” (153:22–154:11)
6. Sports Rants: Football, Kobe's Contract, Connect 4
[123:54–143:09]
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Adam and Damashek debate NFL goalpost height:
- Adam’s long-standing campaign: “I've said probably... we should raise the height of the uprights on the goal post.” (124:16)
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Tomlin “foot on field” controversy: Is it really such a big deal?
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Kobe Bryant’s $50 million contract: Is it earned, or just nostalgia/business?
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Connect 4 tournament tales: Dave Damashek recounts his “triple crown” of office game wins—handled with mock seriousness usually reserved for championship athletes.
- “Not one Allison, not two. Three straight connect four championships... a great honor for me.” (138:50)
7. Call-Ins: Relationships, Gifts, and Life Advice
[60:52–78:46]
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Caller with wife deployed in Afghanistan seeks anniversary gift advice:
- The crew riffs on what really matters in long-distance military marriages and poke fun at “bucket lists” for the deployed.
- Allison: “How about jewelry or something?”
- Adam’s ultimate advice: meaningful care packages, magazines, maybe a heartfelt video.
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On sharing farting in relationships: Adam muses there's little reason to ever intentionally break the “fart seal,” with age bringing involuntary slips instead.
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Online dating & self-improvement: Adam encourages a caller with “no game” to get online, recognizing that “the good looking big guy, the strapping guy, probably not so nimble with the fingers on the computer.” (172:27–172:44)
8. Media, Celebrity, and the Value of Privacy
[188:02–191:19]
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Release of distressing Newtown 911 tapes: The group is disturbed by the requirement that such calls be public record.
- Adam: “To me, the 911 calls do not need to be public record. And I do think they're going to get a celebrity killed one of these days...” (188:02)
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Toxicology report fatigue and the ritual of public disclosure after scandals and deaths: Adam points out how unnecessary and delayed information becomes meaningless (“Key lime pie you didn’t want, but you eat anyway”).
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
- Greg Fitzsimmons ([03:30]): “Am I the only one who got turned on when Allison said she was rear-ended and then a woman said she tapped her?”
- Adam Carolla ([21:28]): “No, Jimmy does not [annoy me]. But I don't live with Jimmy. ... My writing partner, Kevin Hench ... He's Johnny on the spot.”
- Adam Carolla ([27:26]): “If you would like to do an award show and not have LL Cool J host, you need to get a special permit.”
- Greg Fitzsimmons ([33:07]): “Lady Gaga... her [pop] records swamped her talent. She could make a great record just sitting at a piano ... but keeping up with Katy Perry and Rihanna ... swamped it in collaborations ... R. Kelly has to be somewhere, TI must be somewhere in the room... I think she's made the wrong record a few times.”
- Adam Carolla ([105:21]): “Aren't you under some kind of human obligation to tell people when they're not going to receive what they’re requesting? …If you make your club sandwich and it’s just two pieces of pimento loaf ... you need to tell me, that is your club sandwich.”
- Adam Carolla ([153:22]): “It was that valuable currency. ... Cloudy. Light would not pass through them ... you could not take said Tupperware out of the house.”
- Dave Damashek ([138:50]): “Not one Allison, not two. Three straight connect four championships ... Now, your name is etched in history.”
- Adam Carolla ([188:02]): “To me, the 911 calls do not need to be public record. And I do think they're going to get a celebrity killed one of these days ...”
Timestamps of Key Segments
- 01:45–10:50 — Allison’s accident & “no harm, no foul” / bathroom & public etiquette
- 13:10–23:00 — Dr. Drew annoyances & relationship grievance loop
- 27:14–29:36 — Award show hosts, LL Cool J
- 29:31–37:53 — “Is Robin Thicke any good?” Pop production, radio formats, talk/late-night hosts vs. actors
- 105:21, 151:56–154:11 — Thanksgiving: Food rants, menu betrayals, Jello & Tupperware nostalgia
- 123:54–143:09 — Sports: Goalposts, Tomlin controversy, Kobe’s contract, Connect 4 legend
- 60:52–78:46 — Military spouse caller, anniversary gifts, relationship farting, dating advice
- 188:02–191:19 — Newton 911 tapes & public information
Tone & Language
Throughout, the language is unfiltered, irreverent, full of riffs, frankness, and plenty of back-and-forth. The tone swings from raucously comedic and occasionally blue, to wistful, self-deprecating, or even borderline philosophical about the state of media, relationships, and modern life.
Conclusion
This “Carolla Classics” episode showcases the recurring themes that define Adam Carolla’s podcast: everyday grievances rendered hysterically epic, the comfort and irritation of long-term relationships (professional, familial, marital), endless deconstruction of pop culture and media, and a fondness for panel riffs that blur the line between juvenile and trenchant social commentary. With Greg Fitzsimmons, Dave Damashek, David Wild, Steve Hofstadter, and the rest of the cast, listeners get a front-row seat to “unfiltered humor, sharp insights, and candid takes”—vintage Carolla.
Recommended for:
Fans of spontaneous, uncensored conversation, quick-witted panel banter, sports and music tangents, and honest (if often bawdy) reflections on life’s daily absurdities.
(End of Summary)
