Greg Fitzsimmons + Kevin Sorbo (Carolla Classics)

Summary

The Adam Carolla Show (Carolla Classics)

Guests: Greg Fitzsimmons & Kevin Sorbo

Episode Date: February 8, 2026

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Overview

This special "Carolla Classics" episode revives memorable moments from the history of The Adam Carolla Show, featuring two prominent segments: an irreverent roundtable with comedian Greg Fitzsimmons and another with actor Kevin Sorbo. The show, as always, delivers Adam's signature blend of unscripted comedy, sharp commentary, and candid cultural conversations. This compilation includes hilarious rants, personal storytelling, and a deep dive into topics ranging from hospital policies and pop culture to American and international oddities.

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1. The Bridal Shop Ebola Scare & Hospital Gown Stories

Featuring: Greg Fitzsimmons, Allison Rosen, Brian Bishop, Gina Grad
[00:54–09:09]

Key Points & Insights

• Ebola Fear at Ohio Bridal Shop:
  The team discusses how a nurse, later diagnosed with Ebola, visited a bridal store, leading to its short-term business collapse.

  • Adam cracks dark jokes on the shop’s funereal ambiance.

    "This marriage is gonna last forever because you’re never fucking leaving this casket." — Adam Carolla [01:30]

• Absurd Hospital Gown & Surgery Procedures:
  The gang riffs on how hospital gowns inevitably reveal patients' butts, segueing to experiences with medical procedures, including Allison’s uterine surgery and Adam’s wrist operation.

  • Adam goes off about the oddities of hospital protocol, like stripping for wrist surgery:

    "My hand could not get further away from my junk. Why do you need my underpants?" — Adam Carolla [05:30]

  • Adam’s theory: Most medical instructions are really more about preventing the staff from dealing with accidental patient messes.

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2. Cashew Taste Wars, Whale Smarts & Whale Sashimi

Featuring: Jo Koy, Mike Lawrence, Allison Rosen
[09:24–27:23]

Key Points & Insights

• Cashew Debate:
  Allison updates the group on her husband’s apparent cashew aversion, prompting Adam to defend the nut’s reputation.

  "Cashews are delicious. I buy them at truck stops...delicious little hot lamp on it." — Adam Carolla [10:01]

• American Media’s Whale Obsession:
  Adam riffs on why U.S. news is obsessed with whales and their protection, steering into a satirical take on whale intelligence.

  • Philosophical musings on what whales perceive when encountering container ships:

    "You really should be able to get out of the way of something that’s the size of the Chrysler Building." — Adam Carolla [16:38]

  • Joy-Koy bit: Adam (and the crew) counter Japan’s traditional whaling with invented dialogue ("Adam Carolla sashimi"), poking fun at cross-cultural contradictions.

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3. Race Track Room Rates & Social Correctness

Featuring: Jo Koy, Brian Bishop, Allison Rosen
[29:24–31:53]

• Adam discusses overhearing a coworker’s hotel rate gaffe, debating whether to correct people’s honest mistakes, especially when witnessed by others.

  "There are plenty of dickheads that do number one. There could be somebody who actually thinks it’s $271 a month, even though I didn’t." — Adam Carolla [30:56]

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4. The "Brown Sugar vs. White Sugar" Pantry Play

Featuring: Jo Koy, Brian Bishop, Allison Rosen, Gina Grad
[35:44–46:14]

Segment Highlight:
Jo Koy and Adam dramatize a mock racial showdown between pantry items, lampooning stereotypes, with brown sugar and white sugar characters arguing about their pantry status, dessert contributions, and, humorously, genitalia.

"White sugar got little dicks, you know, Brown sugar got big, fat sugar cane dicks... that’s the problem." — Jo Koy (as Brown Sugar) [36:43]

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5. “Bring It Back Week” — Nostalgic Comfort Foods

Featuring: Gina Grad, Brian Bishop
[47:02–52:23]

• Discussion about classic American comfort food—pineapple upside-down cake, Irish stew, tuna casserole, egg salad sandwiches—prompting a mix of nostalgia and laughter.

  "I could go for a good tuna casserole... it's been decades." — Adam Carolla [51:52]

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6. Respect in Comedy, Booking Myths, and Adam’s Stand-Up Style

Featuring: Brian Bishop, Allison Rosen, Jo Koy
[53:18–55:44]

• Adam addresses misconceptions about comic competitiveness, debunking rumors that he avoids funny guests:

  "If you’re funny... you come on early and often as much as humanly possible." — Adam Carolla [54:34]

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7. Whales, Sushi, and Japanese Culture (Kevin Sorbo Segment)

Featuring: “Japanese guest” (likely impersonation), Brian Bishop, Adam Carolla
[21:46–27:09]

• Satirical take on Japanese whaling tradition and technological advancement, lampooning stereotypes and international culinary habits.

  "You guys invent everything... Couldn’t you make, like, imitation whale fat?" — Adam Carolla [24:54]

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8. Audience Q&A, Hollywood Respect, Parenting, and Life Stories

Featuring: Gina Grad, Adam Carolla, callers
[56:04–67:52]

Key Points

• Not Having a “Category” in Hollywood:
  Adam reflects on how bouncing between genres has hindered his recognition.

  "If you hop around as much as I hop around, you don’t really get credit for the one thing." — Adam Carolla [58:22]

• Parenting Stories — Children’s Temperaments & Detachment from Materialism:
  Adam shares anecdotes about his son’s cautious nature and lack of interest in consumerism:

  "He goes through the Monterey Aquarium and then walks right past the gift shop and doesn’t even slow down." — Adam Carolla [69:38]

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9. Adam’s Cinematic Bucket List

Featuring: Gina Grad, Brian Bishop
[78:28–85:41]

• Outlandish Life Goals:
  Adam lists the over-the-top things he’d like to do “before dying”—from registering his hands as weapons to jumping off a pier into a garbage barge, tracking a fugitive by sifting dirt, and playing bass as the only white guy in an all-Black band.

  "Have my hands registered as weapons... be killed by the person I told to kill me if I start to become a zombie." — Adam Carolla [79:09+]

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10. Faith-Based Filmmaking & Cultural Commentary (Kevin Sorbo & Sam Sorbo)

Featuring: Kevin Sorbo, Sam Sorbo, Adam Carolla
[94:00–106:07]

Key Points & Insights

• Making “Let There Be Light”:
  Kevin and Sam Sorbo discuss their faith-based film’s distribution strategy and market for uplifting content outside Hollywood's traditional demographic focus.
  • Adam points out the value of making movies for “underserved” flyover states.

    "If there’s a street and it’s covered with Mexican food joints, then open a Thai food joint... find this group of people that's being ignored." — Adam Carolla [96:49]

• Atheism vs. Religion Satire:
  Adam and Kevin discuss the “religion” of atheism and the pointlessness of militant non-belief activism.

  "I never wanted to burn a calorie being an atheist..." — Adam Carolla [99:49]

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11. News, Modern Culture, and Social Satire

Featuring: Gina Grad, Brian Bishop, Adam Carolla
[106:37–128:44]

• Gina delivers nine news stories with the gang firing off punchlines about Justin Timberlake’s Super Bowl gig, lottery-winning betrayal, Canada’s legal system, and Kyrie Irving's profane fan reply:

  (On Canada’s lottery winner attempting to flee): "The great thing about dumb people, when dumb people run into cash, they can never hide their..." — Adam Carolla [110:01]

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Memorable Quotes

• “Because it looks like a mortuary. It looks like a mortuary.” — Adam Carolla [01:18]
• “If you shit yourself, we don’t want to hassle with it.” — Adam Carolla [07:24]
• "My point is, it led the news, it was the whales, and it turns out they are getting into shipping lanes and they could theoretically be getting hit by container ships." — Adam Carolla [13:00]
• "White sugar got little dicks, you know, Brown sugar got big, fat sugar cane dicks..." — Jo Koy (as Brown Sugar) [36:43]
• "You guys invent everything... Couldn’t you make, like, imitation whale fat?" — Adam Carolla [24:54]
• "If you’re funny... you come on early and often as much as humanly possible." — Adam Carolla [54:34]
• "Have my hands registered as weapons... be killed by the person I told to kill me if I start to become a zombie." — Adam Carolla [79:09]
• "I never wanted to burn a calorie being an atheist..." — Adam Carolla [99:49]

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Timestamps for Notable Segments

• Bridal Shop & Ebola: [00:54–03:14]
• Hospital Gown & Underwear Rant: [05:30–08:21]
• Whale Smarts & Satire: [13:00–21:11]
• "Brown Sugar" Riff: [35:44–46:14]
• Nostalgic Foods: [47:02–52:23]
• Adam’s Hollywood Respect: [58:18–60:39]
• Kevin & Sam Sorbo Interview: [94:00–106:07]
• Bucket List Discussion: [78:28–85:41]
• Expanded News Segment: [106:37–128:44]

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Tone & Style

The episode maintains Adam’s trademark irreverence, wit, and friendly “insult comedy.” Guests and co-hosts blend into Adam’s rhythm, riffing with him on the absurdities of daily life, cultural contradictions, and the strange logic of American institutions. The roundtable format is loose, conversational, and packed with throwaway gags and zinger comebacks.

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In Summary

This Carolla Classics entry revisits some of the best unscripted and side-splitting moments from The Adam Carolla Show’s rich history. The rotating cast delivers everything fans expect—life lessons delivered irreverently, cultural critiques, weird news, and a healthy dose of sarcastic nostalgia. Whether it’s the fate of a “plagued” bridal shop, the mysteries of whale cognition, or an epic pantry showdown between brown and white sugars, fans old and new will find something to make them laugh, wince, and think.

Transcript

[Adam Carolla]

Foreign.

[Brian Bishop]

Welcome to Corolla Classics. I'm your host, superfan Giovanni. This is the podcast. We play the best moments, highlights and fans like the clips from all 16 years of the Adam Corolla show. We have a companion podcast titled Corolla Classics. You can find the ad free archives at Podcast one plus. Check it out and sign up. If you'd like to get access to the ad free archives of the Adam Carolla show, The Adam and Dr. Drew show, as well as access to the brand new podcast Beat it out, make sure to check out Adam Carolla substack adamcorla.substack.com and if you'd like to request a clip, please email us classicsdamcarolla.com all right, let's get to the clips coming up first, we have adam Carolla show 1440 with the great Greg Fitzsimmons, Allison Rose, and Brian Bishop for 2014.

[Allison Rosen]

Speaking of the Ebola fear, here's a story that I wanted to get to last week, but I didn't have a chance. But there was an Ohio bridal shop that the nurse who. One of the nurses who came down with Ebola had. She was engaged and she visited that bridal shop before coming down with Ebola. And business for that bridal shop completely shut down for a little while because everyone was afraid to go to this bridal shop called Coming Attraction.

[Adam Carolla]

Because it looks like a mortuary. It looks like a mortuary.

[Brian Bishop]

There's some windows in there, man. Show off the goods.

[Allison Rosen]

You can come see our dresses and never leave. It does look. Really, it does. I wonder if it was a mortuary before.

[Adam Carolla]

This marriage is gonna last forever because you're never fucking leaving this casket. Yeah. Maybe they should combine. The two times are tough. That's right. One stop shopping. I don't know why. I don't know what a mortuary even looks like, but this bridal shop looks like a mortuary.

[Allison Rosen]

Yeah, it looks sort of like a chapel. Yes, this one does.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes. So business has dropped off because she's. She's. Because it turns well.

[Allison Rosen]

So they did this whole UV cleansing thing, which the CDC said they didn't need to do, but they wanted to do it for appearances so that people would feel comfortable coming back in there. Although again, looking at this photo, no one should be comfortable going in there, to be honest.

[Adam Carolla]

You're never leaving.

[Allison Rosen]

You're not coming out.

[Adam Carolla]

You're not coming out. And besides, anyone who knows anything about science knows that chiffon is super fertile soil for disease. Yeah. It's a breeding ground for disease. Plus, you're wearing a veil. How are you gonna catch anything? It's a good point. You know, I mean, that's why they actually started the veils, because wedding gowns started during the first plague. And so they said, we gotta save. If we gotta save anybody, let's save the brides. Because really, they're gonna have the babies.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

I mean, if we're gonna keep humanity going, save only the brides, and then all the men should be able to have sex with them, really. To make sure that they're as productive as possible. Right. That's why they don't have a back.

[Allison Rosen]

That's what the veil's for.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. There's no back on those wedding dresses, if you've noticed. But ultimately, this is going to be a windfall for this place. Right. Because it gets in the news, people talk about it, people get outraged. And you lost a couple of weeks of work. But.

[Allison Rosen]

But a bowl of fans.

[Adam Carolla]

A bowl of fans throwing.

[Allison Rosen]

Throwing themselves through the doors. Speaking of butless gowns, I completely forgot to mention that when I had my uterus procedure some weeks ago. I don't know if you know about this, Greg, but I know you knew about the one I had a couple years ago. I had to have some. They thought they were fibroids. Turns out they were polyps. Doctor described it as like scraping mushrooms off the inside of my uterus.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Allison Rosen]

Anyway, that wasn't painful.

[Adam Carolla]

It's the pig that found them. That was the uncomfortable part of the procedure. I think they have dogs who can do it now, too. That's what I'm saying. Not only was it embarrassing, and I call it inappropriate, but obviously painful because.

[Allison Rosen]

They gave me a pill to put.

[Adam Carolla]

Arnold, come here, boy.

[Allison Rosen]

They gave me a pill to put up my vagina first to soften my cervix so it would dilate more. But they didn't tell me it's to fit a pig.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, well, they always keep the snout on the sort of down level. What they do is they scare the pig. They stand behind the pig. That's right.

[Allison Rosen]

What do they yell?

[Adam Carolla]

They yell if you turn around, you're bacon. So he just goes nostril first in your vagina? Mm. I think it's E.B. and Mr. Ziffle that does that. I don't know. It's a Green acres thing.

[Allison Rosen]

So Wilbur 200.

[Adam Carolla]

That's the only. The only famous pig in a sitcom as far as I know, was from Green Acres. I think his name was Arnold.

[Brian Bishop]

In a sitcom. You're probably right.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, I mean, the Dukes of Hazzard may have had something.

[Brian Bishop]

I'm pretty sure.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, it was Hogg, right? His name was Arnold.

[Brian Bishop]

Wait, wait, there's Honey Boo Boo's mom.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, sorry. How dare you?

[Allison Rosen]

So anyway, when they had me put the gown on, I forgot to mention they gave me two gowns. And they said, put one on forward and one on backwards. I didn't know if that was. Is that. You're nodding.

[Brian Bishop]

That's a good way to prevent things from spilling out, because those things always have the opening in front or back. So if you go to. It's like you're wearing a little bathrobe.

[Allison Rosen]

Yeah, it was smart. I had never seen that before. They could just come up with a butt. With a non. They could come up with a buttful gown.

[Adam Carolla]

So is it like when you take two ball caps, go forward and backwards, make it into a Sherlock Holmes hat?

[Allison Rosen]

It was like that, but with hospital gowns, there's a lot of fabric is what it was.

[Adam Carolla]

I never got that. I got the. I got the. I got the. Give me your underpants. When you had to have the. I had to have wrist surgery, you know, and they're like, give us your underpants for wrist surgery. That's what I said. And I said the way they do wrist surgeries, they lay you out on a gurney and they strap you to a sandwich board and they strap your arm down because they don't want you flailing about in the middle of their surgery. And I was like, my hand could not get further away from my junk. Why do you need my underpants? And they're like, there's elastic in the band. There could be a static electric charge, and your underpants could literally catch on fire. And I just said, where's the box? Because I will sign that box. I will signature. I'll put my initials in the box. If my junk bursts into flames during this procedure, you will not be held liable. Now, look, put a cigarette out on my sack, then we got a problem. But if the electrostatic charge causes my underpants to burst into flames, it will not cost this facility a penny. But where's the option?

[Brian Bishop]

You are willing to indemnify them, right?

[Adam Carolla]

Right. Do they hurt you? No. And then, of course, it's smash cut to drugged up me with a club on my hand after the surgery in the back room, attempting to get my both legs through the same hole. You know what I mean? Drooling and flopping about, back asshole and sack hanging out, door cracked open. It's like cor I could have kept my underpants on. Impossible. But once your hands are strapped into the sandwich board, can't they just take them off themselves? That's what I would do. I'd like, all right, you can keep your underpants. And then I'd put you under and then you'd wake up and they'd be gone and they'd be on my head and I'd be like, what, some sort of magical briefs? I don't know. Hold on, let me turn the lighthole around so I can hear you.

[Gina Grad]

Electricity.

[Adam Carolla]

Jesus. Let me explain what 90% of. Of all hospital stuff is. If you shit yourself, we don't want to hassle with it. So I learned this quickly because they do that thing where they go, you're going into surgery first thing tomorrow morning. So no fluids and no solid food after midnight the night before. And I go, okay. And then the next time I was going in, I was getting hernia surgery at 5pm and they're like, no fluids and no solid food after midnight the night. And I'm like, well, there's pretty big difference between 9am and 5pm so this isn't much of a science, is it? And realize everything is loosely based on your loosely based stool, which is, we don't want you shitting this place up. And I don't wanna fucking clean it up and I don't wanna cut your underpants off you and wipe your asshole because you've shit your. Everything is based on the one person that shits themselves.

[Allison Rosen]

But when someone comes in for emergency surgery, they aren't like, give em an enema and we'll in 17 hours. I mean, they just do it right away. They obviously can.

[Adam Carolla]

That's a very good point. And that speaks to me going, yeah, you're right. Someone gets in a motorcycle accident, it's like, well, his ribs are poking through his side. When did he last eat? 15 hours. We can work on him. No, they just work on him. So, like, they always give you the. Well, the anesthetic. No, no, no, no, no. They don't want you shitting on yourself or pissing yourself. So that's why. Because you're right. Every battlefield, everything that happened on the freeway, all half those people are driving home from McDonald's when they get into this grape. I say, just have the classic lasagna around noon anyway, and go in and go, wow, that one must. That one snuck past the gully.

[Brian Bishop]

I guess it had a little stutter step. All right, that was Adam Carillo Show 1440 coming up next we have Adam Carillo Show. 1384. Mike Lawrence, Jo Coy, Allison Rosen, Brian Bishop. This is from 2014.

[Adam Carolla]

Hope you guys enjoy. Good day. Alison Rosen.

[Allison Rosen]

Hello, Adam. Carolla. I have an update on the cashew situation. Jo Koy. Yesterday I mentioned that I found out after the vows were exchanged that my husband thinks cashews are overrated, which is insanity to me. Anyway, last night he said not only am I a basic bitch, but I'm stuck in the yummy phase because cashews are the sweetest nut. Now, you said to call you if this came up again. I almost did, but I decided I would just bring it up on the show. Well, I mean, that's.

[Adam Carolla]

Cashews are delicious. Cashews are delicious. No, that is. They're delicious. And I buy them at truck stops when they have the little heated plastic, like a little oven. Toaster oven by the cash register. I buy that to 99 cents. Delicious little hot lamp on it. Most of truckers those bags but Joy. Actually, I love them. Yeah, stop calling me Joy. Joy. Well, look, a tongue twister for you, Adam. Why bother with Joe Coy when we can just call you Joy? I just feeling you have a luck and a club and we're all settled. Joe Coy Ball. Bryan is here as well. God damn, girl.

[Brian Bishop]

A Serbin wanted that with the hashtag top drop on Twitter.

[Adam Carolla]

Tell me what you guys think of this conceptually. And Jo Koy can be found by the way at Newport Funny Bone in Cincinnati, Fort Lauderdale Improv and Omaha Funny Bone as well. All coming up August 8th through August 10th and then August 29th through the 31st and September 5th through the 7th.

[Brian Bishop]

Are you sure about those dates? I looked and Joy is playing.

[Adam Carolla]

Joy is playing there.

[Brian Bishop]

So weird.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't know who she is.

[Brian Bishop]

She's hilarious.

[Adam Carolla]

Thank you very little podcast. The yo and Joy show and Josh. So Joy and Joy, what do you guys think about make me angry. This I heard on the news that blue whales were being photographed via satellite and it turned out they were in shipping lanes. And first, I always think I love this country because I don't think any other country would lead the news with the fucking whale talk. You know what I mean? Like we don't have problems here or if we do, we ignore them. But either way, it's a lot of, you know, a lot of whale. I mean, if you think about for.

[Allison Rosen]

How little they've given back to us.

[Adam Carolla]

How little they've given. Like we were done using their blubber for lantern oil about 150 years ago. I think just in general, how much save the whale whale talk, whale watching, stop the Japanese harpooning ships from. I think in general, yeah, whale reparations should be over. Like, for me, I'm just gonna look back, I'm gonna be in my deathbed and I'm gonna be thinking about. They're gonna go, is your life flashing before you? And I'm gonna be going, yes, it's a gay whale. He wants to get married. He also wants to smoke cannabis. And we don't. And we're gonna argue about it. Oh, oh. And we're worried about it.

[Allison Rosen]

We carry him to prison pipeline.

[Adam Carolla]

We're worried about the secondhand smoke that's coming from his cannabis. Like, it's. I feel like my entire life is just gonna be one big secondhand smoke, whale, gay right to marriage, legalized marijuana thing, and then that's it. I won't remember my kids or anything else. I'll just remember gay whales not having the right to marry. And by the way, I want gays to be able to be married and I want pot to be legal so I could get on with my life.

[Allison Rosen]

Whale referee.

[Adam Carolla]

But my point is, it led the news, it was the whales, and it turns out they are getting into shipping lanes and they could theoretically be getting hit by container ships because they're in shipping lanes. And we got a picture of a huge container ship in a whale. Now, here was the thought I had. My thought, of course, wasn't, oh, my God, someone's got to do something about the whales. I feel Daryl Hannah would have had that thought, but not this one.

[Brian Bishop]

She chained herself to a whale.

[Adam Carolla]

She's going to chain herself to a humpback. Gary, what is the size of the. I believe the sperm whale's the biggest, but the blue may be the biggest or the second biggest. It's 100ft long.

[Brian Bishop]

I mean, these things are the biggest.

[Adam Carolla]

But blue or sperm, either way, but yeah, blue hundred feet long and tons thousands and thousands of pounds. And I just thought to myself, they're not that smart. When you see the picture of the container ship. Now, the blue whale may be several ,thousand pounds and 8,500ft long, but the container ship is 700ft long and weighs hundreds and thousands of metric tons. This. This whale probably doesn't know that that's a ship, but he should know that that's a bigger fucking whale coming closer to. That's what I'm saying. So the whale must be. The whale's got a weird life because the whale's going around the ocean, looking at great white sharks and going 25ft, you know, 18ft, I, I, I shit bigger than you. You're moving. Yeah, that's right. And looking at giant yellowfin tuna and dolphins going kibble. And then all of a sudden they look up and here comes something that's 50 times their size just making their way and going, goddamn, that is the biggest motherfucker in this. They have to think something of it, right? I mean, when they see other things swimming around the ocean, they have a thought. They just must think. When they have like the whale convention.

[Allison Rosen]

Whalecon.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. And the door walls are, you know, they're grouped off over here and the killer whales over here and they think killers are pejorative. And they're arguing over whether they're white and black or, or mixed or what they should call themselves. Whale American breakout.

[Brian Bishop]

Sessions. Killer whales, really. So dangerous.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. And there they are. At some point, somebody's got to go. There is that massive whale that never comes to the convention, that dwarfs all of us, that no humans ever really talk about. And no Japanese ever tries to harpoon them. Nuh. How come? Think how much blubber they could get from that whale. They'd kill thousands of us to get just a blubber from that one whale. They never go after.

[Allison Rosen]

Him. Is that whale like a God to them? No, wait a.

[Adam Carolla]

Minute. Obviously not, because he's cutting them off. Oh, wait, an angry, vengeful God. I just thought about it. But wait a minute. The Japanese whaling ship has to come across as a slightly bigger, super angry whale that shoots its tusk out at them. Right. So you gotta be like, hey, compadre, what's happening, big man? And then like, that's Shaquille o'. Neal. And all of a sudden he shoots you in the with.

[Allison Rosen]

Something. And then you get lifted out and up like.

[Adam Carolla]

Raptured. Like raptured, yeah, man. So whales are dumb then? Well, compared to what? Well, that was a dumb whale. Well, I mean, he swam directly across the bigger whale. We were looking at a picture of a whale that was. Here's my point. You really should be able to get out of the way of something that's the size of the Chrysler Building. Yeah. That is moving its way slowly through the ocean. When you're fairly nimble, not running.

[Brian Bishop]

Serpentine or swimming serpentine, it's kind of.

[Adam Carolla]

Going, just going in a long straight line. You could probably feel it, feel those propellers turning from miles.

[Allison Rosen]

Away. You have to. Because isn't.

[Adam Carolla]

That. But I'm just saying, psychologically, what's that whale thinking, what is it? What does he think of this thing? These marine.

[Brian Bishop]

Mammals. These marine mammals are super smart. Dolphins and whales, they probably couldn't articulate it, but they probably know that it's not animal. Right. Like, let's check whale.

[Adam Carolla]

Tweets. What do they like? Cool fins. But wait a second, Brian. They have no time that at. They have no context for any man made anything that's not organic. You know what I mean? I mean that's. That's moving, that's. Or that's animated and not organic. Whales use most of their brain, like more brain than we do, don't they? Like, how does anyone. They use, like nobody.

[Brian Bishop]

Knows. Joy just saw Lucy, so that's what I'm.

[Adam Carolla]

Saying. So then you know you're gonna. Joycey, did you see Lucy? I'm gonna. I'm gonna fucking leave if you call me Joy one more time. I saw Lucy yesterday. Did you? Yeah. Are you obsessed with the. How much your brain. I'm obsessed with the fact I'm obsessed with the fact that they said that the dolphin uses more brain than we.

[Allison Rosen]

Do. Dolphins don't have podcasts though, or many of the.

[Adam Carolla]

Other. They live in podcasts compared to.

[Allison Rosen]

Other dolphins or other.

[Adam Carolla]

Animals. Ooh.

[Allison Rosen]

Nice. Maybe they are quite smart compared to people. I.

[Adam Carolla]

Think. I want to know what does a whale and. Or a porpoise or dolphin think of a container ship? Adam, here's what I'm trying to. I'm asking you a question. Go ahead, go ahead. What was the question again?

[Allison Rosen]

Does a porphus or dolphin think of a container.

[Adam Carolla]

Ship? Does it think it's a bigger thing, a bigger species that's moving through the ocean? Or does it not think at all? Or does it think that some man made something even though it's not sure what man is? Look, even the shark thinks a surfer is food, right? So the whale's got to think. Yeah, well, that's the thing. Yeah. The shark sees the guy on the surfboard. The shark thinks it's a seal and comes up and hits it.

[Brian Bishop]

Yeah. I gotta think that they know it's not animal. I don't.

[Adam Carolla]

Know. But what are they compared to what? You know what I.

[Brian Bishop]

Mean? Submarine is the only other thing that literally.

[Adam Carolla]

Every. Well, they try to fuck submarines all day long. Let's get to what I wanted to say real quick. Go ahead. When we see a big dude, no matter how many times we see him, like over 6. 4. 6. No, 6. 6. We always react the same way. We go, holy shit, he's tall. Every Time, but we've seen him a thousand times. Holy shit, he's tall. I know we give that same gawk and same. But what I'm saying is whale doesn't do this. I'm six two. I saw Shaq and I. And Shaq is seven two. So he's a. He's a foot taller than me. But it's really. He's only 13% taller than me. These things are thousand percent bigger. Yes. This would be like if Shaq was 200ft tall and his scrotum weighed several metric tons. Just to pick a part of him that we could get onto a truck scale. But you know what I'm saying, this has got to freak the whales out. I don't need answers. I'm posed questions. You form your own.

[Allison Rosen]

Answers. But if you did want answers, you know who I think would know? Either the makers of blackfish or that woman who came in here and kept saying.

[Adam Carolla]

Aquaria. Yes, I would like to talk to both. I'd like to talk to both of them. What do the Japanese know that we don't know about whales getting these whales? What is it about this fucking whale that they want so bad? Like it's the ultimate.

[Brian Bishop]

Sushi. Well, it must be.

[Adam Carolla]

Delicious. Have you tried whale? Yellowtail Good. That fucking whale, though. I'm a sill. I love that whale with wasabi. It's weird that the smallest people are killing the biggest creatures on the planet. Sashimi. Toby. Toby. No. Toby Whale. Toby Whale. Toby Dick whale. Oh, Moby Toby. Moby Dick. No. Toby Dick. Whale. Toby Dick. Delicious. Do you guys. And what about the Rainbow Warrior? Rainbow Warrior. What's that? Rainbow Warrior. The Rainbow Warrior. Yeah. The Greenpeace boat. Yes. You know Greenpeace? What asshole they are. Yeah. They hit you with a fire hose just to get in front of Toby Dick. Yeah. So the Greenpeace Rainbow Warrior comes up and ruin everything for.

[Brian Bishop]

Us.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. You go out trying to catch a few whales. Just one whale. That's all we want. Well, usually we can all share. No. But then you come back out again, you get another whale every day, give or take four or.

[Gina Grad]

Five.

[Adam Carolla]

Whale. Yeah. It's a weird thing to be. You know, it's 2014. Yeah. But so yummy. I don't feel like I miss whale. Like around Thanksgiving. Whale is something good for the holiday. What's that? Day. Horaday holiday. Japanese holiday. Yeah. But here's what I'm asking. Yes. You guys are pretty evolved culture. Yes, we.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Are.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. And it's 2014. Oh, yeah. Very events now. Have you seen our new tower vision? Tower vision? Yes. No, Flat screen television. I don't know what terror vision.

[Brian Bishop]

Is.

[Adam Carolla]

Wow. It's where you watch a tv. Oh, oh, I'm sorry, right. Television. Yes. It's. What? Unbeliever. It's unbelievable. Unbelievable. What I'm saying is this. Uh huh. Here you guys, you're on the vanguard of technology. Yes, we are. And very proud. You're doing flat panel TVs that are quarter inch thick, amazing computing and watches and stereos and electronics. But then you go out and you harpoon a whale. Oh, my mouth just water. No, but what I'm saying is. Oh, wow. Thank you, Adam. My stomach is a growling. No, I'm saying you are the reason for one whale's death. Let me ask you this. So we used to do that a hundred years ago, but then we stopped evolved past that. We got past it and. But why? Well, the only people so yummy part of it is Hayden Panettiere, I think. But the other part is there's other folks that do harpoon the whales, like Eskimos, but they don't. Smart people. But when's the last time you bought a flat panel TV from an Eskimo company, Inuit.com. or bought an amazing luxury automobile from a company that was run and built by Eskimos? It's not common. It's not common. So I'm saying there are some people that still do it. Have you taste. Well, no, I don't. You should try. Before you speak, I don't feel like I'm missing whale. Delicious, oily, Very yummy. I. I guess what I'm saying is of the best, which is the Barry the berry of the whale. So.

[Brian Bishop]

Yummy. What a compelling.

[Adam Carolla]

Point. Okay, what I'm asking, what I ask you is are you incredibly advanced civilization. So what big fucking deal. Have you tried.

[Brian Bishop]

Whale? Maybe that's how they honor the.

[Adam Carolla]

Past while also looking forward. Thank you, Brian, but we have a past treat you very well. By the way, have you tried cancer? Jazz is good. As the whale, I would ask, I would, I listen. The ray Rainbow Warrior. I've not been on the Rainbow Warrior, but I think what they're doing is a good thing. Oh, fuck those people. I don't like you guys. I don't even care about whales. I don't like the idea that you're going out in 2014 harpooning whales. And let me say this. Yes. Our new special for the day, Adam Carora sashimi. You guys, you guys invent everything you have Adam Carora sashimi. Prada Corolla platter. Platter. So yummy. Corolla platter. So yummy. You guys, Honda came out with a little robot. Oh, yeah. It'll play chess. It'll clean your house. Yep. Couldn't you guys synthesize a whale? No. Couldn't you make, like, whale fat? Could you? Imitation whale fat. I feel like you guys can do anything technological. I can't believe it's not.

[Allison Rosen]

Blubber.

[Brian Bishop]

Well played.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, Parker, blubber. But you know what I'm saying. We would never do such a thing. Why not? Because the whale is so yummy. But we. We. No matter how hard you try to duplicate whales. Let me explain our relationship with whales. We don't really know pussy before. That's what I'm saying. Like real pussy. Understood. But it. We don't. I don't know. We have a mixed and weird relationship with whales. As Americans, we don't really like them that much, but yet we like to watch them. But yet no one ever talks about them majestically. There's not too many novels about him except for an evil whale that's going after. The point is, is we don't know anything about whales. We don't really care. But we don't. Well, you don't need to know. No, we don't just know that they are delicious. But we don't like the idea that you guys are harpooning them. Well, you don't know how good a whale is, so why are you even saying anything? Maybe I'm a hypocrite. We eat tons of crab and lobster. We like bluefin tuna. We eat everything else that comes from the ocean. For some reason, we're angry about the whales. Just try. Just try a whale. Yummy. Adam Carora sashimi whale. What if you go out and you harpoon a whale and it's 170 tons, so many Japanese. And I take a little bite, I don't like it, and we got to throw it all away. Feel like a waste, you.

[Brian Bishop]

Know? Think of all their lantern oil you could make out of.

[Adam Carolla]

It. Yeah, but how many lanterns do you have? A lot of lanterns. I don't have any lanterns in Japan. I have 19 lanterns. All run off of whale oil. All of them. Wow. House well lit. I can't. All well lit. From whale. From whale. I feel like every time you're so advanced. When I read at night, I go, thank you, whale. I can read now. But again, I just feel like you guys are underselling yourself. You're so advanced. I went to SeaWorld the other day. Mm. And, boy, did my stomach growl. Oh, stomach just growling. Jump out of water. So weird to me. We won't touch dolphins and we.

[Brian Bishop]

Won'T touch whales in terms of food, but we'll make food out of just about everything.

[Adam Carolla]

Else. Everything else. Shrimp. And then don't get me started on just shark fin soup and rhino horn and all that stuff. I just. You just. You're a real Rubik's Cube. Oh, fun puzzle. Yeah. Do you know? Yes. Rubik's Cube. Rubik's a Cube. Rubik's Cube. Rubik's a Cube. Rubik's Cube. Rubik Cube. Rubik's Cube. Rubik. Rubik's Cube. Rubik's Secure. Do you have Rubik's Cube? Oh, yes. I feel that's what you guys are culturally hard to figure out, hard to master. Yeah. Green, red, blue, yellow, yellow. Yeah. Rubik's Cube. That's you guys. Yes. Yeah. And we love rare. We love to eat a whale. You love to eat the whale? Yes. Just tryora. Sashimi. Prara. What's platter? Prairer prayer. Prairer prayer. Pratter is a prade with a sashimi. Oh, platter. There you go. There you go. So good. It's unbelievable. All right, Joe Coy is in studio. As you probably know by now. I was thinking Jo Koy. Yes, sir. Tell me if you guys ever do this. I was doing this thing with Bill Shatner a little earlier today. He does a web series, brown bag wine club thing where you sit there and drink some wine and try to guess how much and where it comes from and stuff. It's an excuse to drink red wine with Shatner, get filmed. But, ah, next Monday is when it airs. And anyway. Oh, that's when Shatner, who I. Anyway, long story. Either way, I was sitting with the makeup person and they're putting a little powder on me. And Matt Fondelier came in and he said, when you guys go off to do a show in. See, Austin, we're doing a show outside of Austin, but I'm doing a vintage race at the COTA track over there. The F1.

[Brian Bishop]

Track. We're doing one in San.

[Adam Carolla]

Antonio. We're doing one in San Antonio, but I'm sticking around and doing a race there in the Cota F1 track outside Austin. They're having a vintage race there. And he came in and he said, found a hotel room in Austin. It's a suite. You and all your guys can just. We just camp out on the floor. Everyone just Sleeps. Sleeps around. And he said, It's 271amonth. Now I know he meant $271 a night. And I never would have said anything, but because the makeup artist heard it too, I had to say something because now the makeup artist heard his fuck up too. Where are you guys at with that? Like, I knew he meant, yeah, 271. And I like when people just let that stuff. He said, I found a room. It's $271 a month. And I know he meant night. And I was never confused. And I wouldn't have been confused. But would you correct him anyway? Or would you correct him only if someone else. You know that thing where somebody else overhears what goes on and now you feel like you must say something because otherwise they're going to think you think that too. Do you, when you're asking this question, do you mean, are we going to correct him sarcastically? No, I just mean laugh at the end, like you mean. I'm just saying, are you gonna. I would normally say nothing because I know what he means. Yeah. And he doesn't know he fucked.

[Brian Bishop]

Up. What's to be gained from correcting.

[Adam Carolla]

Him? Well, I think there's a lot of people who, if somebody says something that's incorrect, correct the other person. First off, people are assholes. Like when people go. People say something, like, all the time. They'll go, hey, you want to go out to dinner? And then we'll see a movery? And they go, movery, movery, movery. And you go, sorry, I'm tired. I meant movie. Yeah, movery. But you said movery. And you're like, sorry, thank you for pointing that out. Because I was gonna go my whole life pronouncing it movery. Right. So first off, there are plenty of dickheads that do number one. There could be somebody who actually thinks it's 271amonth, even though I didn't. It's not even an insulting correction. It's. You said a month, but you meant a day. I'm guessing most people might say something. I don't know.

[Allison Rosen]

Sorry. Go.

[Brian Bishop]

Ahead. If I move to say anything, I'll try and say it with a joke like, oh, two seven one a month. Hell of a deal. I'm moving to Austin.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. I wouldn't burn the calories.

[Brian Bishop]

Hilariously. Save.

[Adam Carolla]

That. Let me write that down. Save it for the live show. My point is, I wouldn't. No, I'm saying I wouldn't have said anything in the first place. But now that There was a set of ears. Were you worried that she was.

[Allison Rosen]

Also confused, though, or you just didn't want her to think that you didn't.

[Adam Carolla]

Notice there was a witness to this verbal crime?

[Allison Rosen]

No. You're guilty, too, if you don't speak.

[Adam Carolla]

Up. She would think that I didn't hear him. But then there's those people that, like, during the holidays, when there's, like, items that are placed everywhere, and there's like, this 75% clearance rack, and then there's an item that was placed there that obviously would never be on sale, and they bring it up to the register and they go through the motions until the cashier rings it up. And then they do that dumb look like. But it's on the 495 rack. It was on that rack. Why are you charging me $340 for that? It's super clearance at 130. That's a Lexus 430. That's. But it was on the rack. That's leather. That's heated steering wheel, heated and cooled seats. That's the V8. That's the all weather package. 81,000. Know what's inside the Lexus moonroof? That's not my problem. What I'm saying is it was on that rack for a $45. It's an $81,000. You can keep the change. No, I do like on that rack. Can I speak to your manager? So you guys would correct him if there was a set of ears around?

[Brian Bishop]

I don't think.

[Adam Carolla]

So. No, I.

[Allison Rosen]

Wouldn'T. I think what I would do is then when he walked away, I think I would say. I think he meant a day or a.

[Adam Carolla]

Night. But then you're. To the person. To the person.

[Allison Rosen]

Yeah. To the makeup.

[Adam Carolla]

Artist. What if. Okay, but then you're both dumb. Why would you think you could get that room for $271 for the month? Nobody would. The point is, he said something that was wildly inaccurate. And then you didn't say anything. You just said, okay, which made it seem like you thought that's what it was. Now the makeup person is thinking. You think you're gonna get a hotel room for $271 a night so they think you're stupid. So you have to say something because you just agreed I might actually.

[Allison Rosen]

Be that asshole who would say something in either scenario just so that it gets filed cor in my own.

[Adam Carolla]

Head. Yeah, I guess I would, too. I might double check. I would probably say. You mean per day. Okay, I would do that. Yeah. I didn't by the way, when I brought it up, I did 10 minutes on it and I said, normally, I don't want to waste time with this stuff, but here it goes. And the makeup artist said that seemed awfully cheap for a hotel room. So they obviously were thinking about it themselves, and that's why I wanted to say something about it. All right, Jo Koy. Somebody just. They forwarded me the brown sugar, white sugar thing, which I enjoyed so much, and somebody you can go to. I think you can go to YouTube and, I don't know, punch in Jo Koy brown sugar or something. Someone made a really funny video of the sack of brown sugar and the sack of white sugar, and they obviously burned some calories on it. We'll put it on our homepage. But did you see the Black Lab cartoon? Oh, yeah, that one's flat. Lab is really funny too. More Jo Koy at his best. You're welcome. I was thinking free of charge. I was thinking, what else the hell can we do with brown sugar? Back then? He was trying, anything you want, motherfucker. Well, I wanted to say brown sugar speak. You do a lot of things well. Yes, I do. You're fantastic over the oats. You know, the hot oats in the morning oatmeal. It's great. You mean them Quaker ass motherfuckers, right? But I would argue without a splash of white milk, you wouldn't be what you were without brown sugar, motherfucker. Well, what I was.

[Brian Bishop]

Gonna.

[Adam Carolla]

Oats. I was gonna ask. Just wake up in the morning, eat some dry ass oats. Yeah. Sprinkle some brown sugar on and you're quite delicious. You're certainly delicious. Say it. Duh, duh, lih, li sh. Brown sugar. Brown sugar. Right. No, I don't. I don't taste that kind of language on the air. You. Oh, now, anyway, put me on some good shit. What we're thinking about doing. You ever have ham? I have had ham. Yeah. You ever put brown sugar on him? I've had honey baked ham. And yes, you and your ilk are awesome on top of.

[Gina Grad]

It.

[Adam Carolla]

Exactly. And I've always said there are some. There's some good brown sugar out there. They're not all. You know what I'm saying? What the fuck you talking about? Well, I'm obviously. What do you say to my face, Mother? I read the newspaper. What do you mean some? All of us. I've seen the news. Better than the white sugar. Well, better than the white sugar. Well, now, hold on. That's the reason I wanted to speak to you. White sugar got little dicks, you know, Brown sugar got big, fat sugar cane dicks. I don't know why that's why. Y' all mad? Mad? Cause we got big sugar cane dicks hanging out our bags. This is what people are talking about when they talk about brown sugar. They're so. Speak to me like a man, motherfucker. Why do you keep looking down? It's. It's the confrontation, the anger. Would you be mad? Would you be.

[Brian Bishop]

Mad?

[Adam Carolla]

I'm. I'm just saying. I'm. I'm next to Ajax Pine salt. Well, you're under. Where's white sugar at? You're under this thing for a reason. Now, I've said the pantry. Why can't I be in the. We have a nice thing going on. It's a quiet community. We're not looking for trouble. Gated motherfucking community. We're just not looking for trouble. We have a certain. We're setting our ways. That's all I wanted to say. And I speak for the white flower. I speak for the baking soda. Fuck baking soda. What the fuck does baking soda ever do? Hey, Nothing. First off, we're flavorless, motherfucker. We are open to a diverse community. We let wheat germ in a few years ago. Wheat germ Germs. Yes, wheat germ. And they fit in quite nicely into our community. Germs now love that shit. What I wanted to talk about was dessert. What dessert? Well, we enjoy pineapple upside down cake, and you are punching the motherfucking face. What's your favorite? Pop tart, motherfucker. Look, we agree that the cinnamon and brown sugar. Delicious, motherfucker. Yummy. Certainly top three. I'm saying this. You are the main ingredient in pineapple upside down cake. I mean, as far as the sweetener goes, pineapple ain't shit without brown sugar, and you know that. Maybe it's time for a change. It's just the folks in the pantry have been talking, and we thought maybe white sugar could just kind of slide in, and we could try pineapple upside down cake without you one time. Just to see. Just to break it up, Just to mix it up. Just to see how it. Just to try it one.

[Brian Bishop]

Time.

[Adam Carolla]

I. Go ahead. Do right now. Hold on. This is what I'm talking about. No, you tested me. This is what I'm talking about. You testing me? This is what I'm saying. This is why you're under the sink with the cleanser. This what, motherfucker? Say that to my face again. Say it to my face again. Listen. Say it again. First off, you're looking at me. Yeah. One of my. One of my best friends in the pantry. Who's that? Aunt Jemima and Mrs. Buttersworth. I have no problem with those people. I know. They're some of my best friends now. Aunt Jemima. Yes. Sell.

[Brian Bishop]

Out. Feels like you're digging.

[Adam Carolla]

Yourself. Uncle Ben and Aunt Jemima and myself were dear, dear.

[Brian Bishop]

Friends. I know, but putting that forth as an example of your tolerance doesn't have a.

[Adam Carolla]

Problem. Uncle Ben, he's a fine Southern gentleman and I. We have no problem with him in our community. He's done just fine. I stay real, real brown. Okay. I'm simply saying. Fuck it. Stay right here. I don't give a shit. We're going to make some pineapple upside down cake. Try. And we're going to do it with me this time. That we do not require your services. It's not a full time switch. It's just something. This is what I'm talking about. It's something we would like to try out. And I just feel like, yes, I dominate the confection area. Donuts, cakes, pies and things like that. But I've never branched out into a pineapple upside down cake. And it's just something I'd like to try. Try it with white chips. That's what I'm saying. Be boring as hell. I'm just saying. We're just gonna try it once. It won't taste good at all. I'm warning. I'm saying this as a friend. You my friend. As a friend. You are not my friend. We share the same kitchen. We both have young children and dreams. Trash can, motherfucker. Look. That's where you gonna put me. Most delicious spice in this motherfucker. Listen, as a pillar of this community and as a parent, you know, Sweet and low, my son. Seeing the little packets running. Okay, now. Now, now, now you've crossed the line. Now you've crossed the line. Kantakazi mother. Okay, now you've. Now you've crossed the line, love. Sweet and.

[Brian Bishop]

Low. You still have your place in barbecue sauce. It's not going.

[Adam Carolla]

Anywhere. You goddamn right. Yeah. We're not gonna take that away from you. Ribs. Put me on some ribs. I understand. Put me in some baked beans, motherfuker. You got your little. Put me in some baked beans. You ever had plain old baked beans? No, I don't. They just beans, motherfucker. Look. Put some brown sugar. I'm a family man. I have my delicious, my little sweet and low packets. To look after. And you have your toll house morsels. Now listen to.

[Brian Bishop]

Me. You even adopted that vanilla.

[Adam Carolla]

Extract. That's right. You took extract over me. I just want to try the pineapple upside down cake. Just take the weekend off. Chill out. Chill out. You've got cleanser. I want to get to the motherfucker. You've got the ant killer you can talk to, share some war stories with the A. No, don't don't anger Ray. This is bullshit, man. Don't know it. You better hope Raid doesn't hear you. Let me ask you one more question. One more again. When you eat breakfast, you get some oatmeal. Mm. What do you like to put on it? Be honest. You brown sugar. Okay. But I'd like to try pineapple upside down cake just one time. I am delicious with everybody from our community. That's all I'm saying. We have the canned pineapple. Over here, we have the flower. Okay. Dole ain't shit on me. Oh, you don't anger doll. See to the motherfucking H, brown sugar. Okay. Okay. You want to talk to Dole? C to the motherfucking H, brown sugar. You get on the wrong side of Dole and Raid, and you're gonna have a very fucking long and uncomfortable life. Have you seen doll's calves? I've seen. They're huge. Yeah. Do not anger Dole. Big pineapple. He's a nice guy, but don't cross. Do not cross doll. Yeah, I know. And I'm circles or chunks, Almost black. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Careful now with biggest Asian I've ever seen. That's right. All right, so just enjoy yourself under there. What's it like when they turn the insinkerator on? Like when they turn the garbage disposal on. That's what I'm saying. Goddamn earthquake. Yeah. Scares the shit. It's not a raid. It's not.

[Brian Bishop]

Therapeutic. Like, not at.

[Adam Carolla]

All. Motherfucker shakes you the right, I'm next to the trash can, shit starts.

[Brian Bishop]

Shaking. That's a good.

[Adam Carolla]

Point. What the fuck am I supposed to do? I am sugar. No, you're brown sugar, and I'm gonna take over the pineapple. Sugar is sugar. Obviously, there's just a little difference than the other sugars. Ah, Again, that's the problem. Sweet and low don't even have a dick. Okay, you talk a lot about little pink bag. You want people to integrate you into their forms of confection. You never stop talking about your cup. What? White sugar got a little dick and Good credit. That's it. That's right. Brown sugar got a big dick. And a lot of loans. Unpaid loans. Motherfucker. I'll get to it. If I get me in the pantry so I can work with the other motherfucking baking goods. I can pay off these motherfucking loans. Right? But all the dick talk is go see my kids. All the dick talk kids I got. I've seen the sack of Toll House Marshalls with a bag of raisins in the pantries that I know. The point is this got my eyes. What I'm asking you is this. It's this dick talk that prevents you from getting into the pantry. Dick talk is real talk. But you never stop talking about your dick. You never stop using. You never recognize me for my dick. I'm.

[Gina Grad]

Not.

[Adam Carolla]

It's. We're not.

[Brian Bishop]

Disagreeing. It just might be holding you.

[Adam Carolla]

Back. We're here. Who the fuck are you? Who said you could talk? Motherfucker. That's baking soda. That's arm and hammer I make. He's a good.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Man. That's.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. So done with this motherfucker. He's very. Refrigerator smell. Clean. Little bit of me goes bacon. You can brush your teeth with them. You put them in the fridge. Absorbs odors. I fart around him all the.

[Brian Bishop]

Time. Doesn't bother me at.

[Adam Carolla]

All. He's an awesome friend I have. When he dried up. Doesn't he? That's what I'm saying. Now. Listen to me. Put him next to the goddamn trash can. Listen. He's a legacy. He was born in the pantry. Then his ancestors were born in the pantry and then moved to the refrigerator. Whatever it is. He's in the pantry. Where's Aunt Jemima at? She got put in the pantry as well. Initially just to help. Now she's there full time. The point is this. We would like to help you get into the pantry. But it's all the dick talk. Get into the pantry. Stop talking about your penis. It's not a penis. Stop talking about your cock. Dick. Dick. Sorry. It's a big black brown dick. All right? And stop with the profanity. Okay. Fuck you.

[Brian Bishop]

That was some incisive social commentary.

[Adam Carolla]

Thank you. It's powerful. That was fun. That was good times. Yeah. I don't know why it's gonna sound like a Cat Williams special. I had this thought. And I thought. I fucking love pineapple upside down cake. And then I realized I never eat pineapple upside down cake. And I never order pineapple upside down cake. And then I realized it is the dessert equivalent to fish and.

[Brian Bishop]

Chips. I thought I'd say meatloaf, but yes, fish and.

[Adam Carolla]

Chips. Love it. Never order it. Never get it enough. As a matter of fact, I could think of no greater night out of dining than ordering fish and chips and then pineapple upside down cake. Although it never happened. It never happened. And then, of course, Gary chimes in and said that's the only dessert we would order when we went out. And I was like, I've.

[Allison Rosen]

Never. I didn't even know it's offered that many.

[Adam Carolla]

Pizzas. I had never seen it anywhere. I've never had anyone next to me order.

[Brian Bishop]

It. Let's come up with a menu for the week. We'll make it for our listeners. It'll be Bring it back week. Shepherd's pie, meatloaf. I love it.

[Allison Rosen]

Already. Egg salad.

[Brian Bishop]

Sandwiches. Yes, lunches. Egg salad.

[Adam Carolla]

Sandwiches. Bring it Back week. Just somebody made, like, a cafeteria from the 1950s when we went out to play Long Beach a few weeks ago. Root beer.

[Brian Bishop]

Floats.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes, root beer floats. Somebody just made me a pot of Irish stew. Like, literally, Tupperware foil over the top of.

[Brian Bishop]

It. What's an Irish.

[Adam Carolla]

Stew? Foil over the top. What's Irish.

[Brian Bishop]

Stew? What's an Irish.

[Adam Carolla]

Stew? It's basically just. You guys don't know Irish stew? I've never.

[Allison Rosen]

Had. No, I.

[Brian Bishop]

Do. It's just.

[Adam Carolla]

Stew. Okay. I don't know. I think what we call stew is Irish stew. It's just potatoes and chunks of meat. Whatever. This person, this hero, this saint who worked at the club was like a bartender or something and just went, heard me. Me. Well, because I told Lynette about it. But anyway, I came home that night at 1:30 in the morning, ate half the Tupperware of Irish stew that night. And then the following day for breakfast, I ate the rest of the Irish stew. And then Lynette said, what are you doing for breakfast? I said, I ate a bunch of Irish stew. And she said, where the hell did you get Irish stew? And I said, fan gave it to me. And she said, because you never stopped complaining about me not cooking. And I went, oh, it could be connected. Maybe, maybe, maybe this is just the Irish stew talking. But. Yes, but either way, it was so fucking satisfying. Like. And somebody was telling me about their grandfather, and he cooked Hungarian and I had Hungarian and the spritzel and the stew and the chicken paprikash and all that stuff. But yes, we will give. We should put together a list. And I'm telling you, everyone I know loves pineapple upside down. Cake. Let's do a quick. Dawson. Yeah, boss? Do you like pineapple upside down cake? No, I do not. All right, moving.

[Brian Bishop]

On. Yeah, but still, I knew he.

[Allison Rosen]

Would. Is that why you asked him.

[Adam Carolla]

First? I have a weird intuition. Like when the time Matt came in wearing his father's tennis shoes and I want to know what was up with his shoes. I kept asking what was up with his shoes until he admitted to me they weren't his. I have a way of tuning into the negative very immediately. Let's find out here, Dawson, other than you, who enjoys pineapple upside down cake? Now, I know Gary enjoys it quite a bit because he did it. I enjoy it quite a bit. Brian. It's very.

[Brian Bishop]

Good. Maybe not in my top five desserts, but very.

[Allison Rosen]

Good. Yeah, I like it. I don't come across it very.

[Adam Carolla]

Often. Joe only eat it when it's around. I love it. Okay. All right, Fondelier. Is everyone sitting down? Fondelier has two thumbs up, enjoys it. All right. That means he really likes it. He even eats the fake cherry in the middle. So the. I think out of, I don't know, nine people. Eight or nine people here. Let's just say out of eight people, seven people like it very.

[Brian Bishop]

Much. Sounds about.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. Now, Chris was also.

[Brian Bishop]

A. Yes, but Kaylin's never experienced.

[Adam Carolla]

It. Okay, here's the next. Here's the next question. When is the last time any of us have eaten a piece of pineapple upside down cake? And I think the over under seven years last year. Just don't want to let you down, boss. You don't normally on a story that's coming in and leaving. You know what I mean? But that was a rare.

[Gina Grad]

Experience.

[Adam Carolla]

Wow. All for you, boss. Soon I'll let you down. Okay. All right. So other than Dawson completely destroying.

[Brian Bishop]

My theme, it may have been decades, like 20.

[Adam Carolla]

Years. That's what I'm saying. What else can you say that you really enjoy? I'm not gonna lie, but I think I was in the hospital. I think I just got out of.

[Allison Rosen]

Surgery. I think I was visiting someone in the hospital. Last time I saw it, hospitals are hogging all of.

[Adam Carolla]

It. I was okay for a second piece of pineapple. Can I tell you a big dollop of wine. Whipped cream on there, especially homemade. And here's the key. You don't need to add sweetener or sugar. Just take whipping cream, whip it into whipped cream, and put a big dollop of that on top of it. Un. Fucking bereaveable. Unberivable. Unberivable. All Right. So, Brian, I will put this upon you, okay? I want a.

[Brian Bishop]

Menu. Tweet me your suggestions, Aldbrian, and we'll come up with a menu for the.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Week.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes. Now listen, listen. Do not give us steak.

[Brian Bishop]

No. Stuff that you haven't had in maybe 10 years or don't have it nearly often.

[Adam Carolla]

Enough. I could go for, and this has been decades, I could go for a good tuna casserole. Oh, wow. Good God. I've never had that with the cheese melting on.

[Brian Bishop]

Top. Noodles and noodles.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes. Never with crispy onion in a million years since I've tasted that. When you tell me how.

[Brian Bishop]

To. Shepherd's piece. Million.

[Adam Carolla]

Years. Cheesecake Factory. That again. All right, so go ahead. We'll put a menu together. Let's. Did anyone say chicken pot pie? No, not.

[Brian Bishop]

Yet. Or maybe once. Definitely do.

[Adam Carolla]

That. All right, let's see. Joe Coy. Yes, sir. I'll tell you what you do. You can go to jokoi.com should we spell it out? J o k o y.com Twitter, same Jo Koy podcast, the yo and Joe Show. New episodes available every Tuesday on itunes. Joe is always playing around town, all over the country, doing just a fucking lord's work up on stage. So go to joecoi.com and find out any dates. Adam, when are we going to be on stage with you? I don't know. Whenever. As soon as possible. Listen, put you on the spot. Well, let me tell you something, Brian. Yeah, buddy? You backed me up because you've been with me for a long time. Every once in a while, there's two things that drive me nuts in.

[Brian Bishop]

Life. I don't know about that. Oh, sorry. Fuck that.

[Adam Carolla]

Up. There's two things when our old engineer Anderson, good guy, would say, you know, Adam only likes Brian because he's a brown noser. I become violent because I'm like, Brian disagrees with 92% of what comes out of my mouth. Sometimes before I'm done saying it.

[Brian Bishop]

It'S closer to 94, but.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay. So the notion that I only like Brian because he's a brownnoser makes me insane. And I think that's why Anderson says.

[Brian Bishop]

It. That's why he does.

[Adam Carolla]

It. All right. The other thing that makes me insane is when people go like, well, this comedian or that comedian, you know, wears this is how come it's been a while. Well, you know, when a funny guy comes on, then Adam feels a little pressure and then he doesn't want to.

[Allison Rosen]

Feel. You would like nothing better than to sit back and let someone be.

[Adam Carolla]

Funny. I would love to sit up on with anybody, and they could do all the heavy lifting, and I'll just get paid at the end of the night. I just had this called.

[Brian Bishop]

Brilliance. I just had this conversation today with Giovanni. He had me on his podcast, was gonna come out in a few days, and he's like, some comedians get upset because they're like, oh, Adam didn't want me on this show for the first five years, but now that I'm popular. But, like, Adam has nothing to do with the booking. All he wants is funny. People come on the show and be funny. Like, this is a very perceived thing on some people's.

[Adam Carolla]

Parts. It's weird. And if you're funny, if you're Harlan Williams or David Alan Greer or Joy Akoya, you come on early and often as much as humanly possible. Anybody else's names but mine? How about Joy Moore? He's funny. Dana Gold's gonna be with up up with us. And now Dana Gold. It's Dana Gould. He's funny. Why not let him? Come on. I've always. I never. I don't. I don't know where that comes from. I really don't. Why do they associate that with you? I don't get.

[Allison Rosen]

That. Because they probably tried to get on the show and for whatever reason, couldn't, which has nothing to do with Adam. But then they read into.

[Adam Carolla]

It. I think they think comedians are, like, hyper competitive too, or something. But I looked at it the same way when I was cleaning carpets. If there was a guy who just worked his ass off and it was just me and him cleaning a colony kitchen in Baker, California, I'm like, let me work with that dude. Yeah, he's cleaning his ass off versus the guy sitting smoking, and I'm doing all the fucking work. So Jo Koy is legitimately funny and welcome on stage as often as we can get him on stage. All right, Just don't be too.

[Brian Bishop]

Funny. I love.

[Adam Carolla]

You. Yeah, not funnier than me, because I won't tolerate that.

[Brian Bishop]

There's adam karolo show 1384. Coming up next, we have adam kroll show 1886, featuring eddie braun, jo koy, gina grad, and brian bishop from 2016.

[Gina Grad]

Yes. Now, this is an adorable video, but when I read all the comments, there was one common.

[Adam Carolla]

Theme. Hey, mom, it's sunny. They're taking really good care of me. I am safe. And especially Chris and dad, 5 and he is drunk. Yeah, that kid is way too. It.

[Gina Grad]

Does. Okay. It doesn't get cuter than that. But Every single person was like, is that a hostage video? Is this blinking Morse code? Yeah, I am safe. Hello.

[Brian Bishop]

Greetings. My captors are treating me.

[Adam Carolla]

Well. He had hungry lips, dry.

[Brian Bishop]

Lips. South to.

[Adam Carolla]

America. All right. I think he said, dad is drunk and he looks homeless with his eyes. All right, I got a lot more to tell you about this, but we'll go on. I'll do part two tomorrow because there's plenty to get to. Let's see. Charles 42, Berlin. Hey. Hey, Charles. Yeah, man. What's going on? I just want to ask you. How much is going on? Just want to ask you. Why do you think that you're not really so respected within the whole scene there in Hollywood.

[Kevin Sorbo]

A while.

[Adam Carolla]

Ago. Yes. I think it was probably two months ago that on a podcast, you talked about Adam Carolla Day in Nevada, and you listed off all of your accomplishments and quite a few. And why do you think that people don't respect you? Well, I don't know that they disrespect me. I think that you have a sort of a. I'll give you an example. You have to do you have to pick a sport in this town. Usually, like, stand up, you know, I don't. I'm not a traditional standup or even, like, known for being a standup. So when they start talking about, like, who's the best or who's the funniest, they choose from a list of standups oftentimes. Or film actors or moves. The funniest actor or whatever. If you hop around as much as I hop around, you don't really get credit for the one thing you.

[Gina Grad]

Don'T make anyone's official list of anything.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. Who's the best.

[Gina Grad]

Documentarian? I.

[Adam Carolla]

Am. I do understand that I'm perceived as a bit of a clod. I do get that part. But what I want to ask is, I mean, that's. What you do is quite impressive. I'm blown away by myself. Yeah, I know. But why don't other people respect you for that? You cannot imagine how wrong you are. I don't. It was. Thank you. Is that Jane Goodall? Jane does not.

[Brian Bishop]

Agree.

[Adam Carolla]

No. Somebody. Brian Callan, who I love. And you'll find out why after this said, like, look, we're always talking about, like, who's the funniest? Who's the funniest stand up. But what Adam does is he goes out on stage for an hour, hour and a half, and basically makes it up. Like, who's doing that? And then how come he gets no credit for doing that? And why is there a category for that? Because most of the people we're talking about can't do that. That part, they do an act, which is fine, but it's weird that in a weird way we're doing a dive that has a higher difficulty level to stick, and we'll stick it most the time, but we don't get points for the dive, which is a weird thing. But, you know, people also have a pretty limited time to think about things, you know, and so, you know, there's that. But also, look, it doesn't, it doesn't help that I make three films that are very highly rated on Rotten Tomatoes and none of them get into Sundance. Like, that is not helping. Like when I said, I sent Tom Arnold a. You know, he said, oh, I want to. I love the Hammer, but I should check out the Paul Newman doc. And he was like, oh my God, it's blown away. When's it coming out? And I said, it's out. It's been out for a year. Oh, how'd it do with Sundance? Like, it didn't get accepted. It's like, what? It didn't get accepted? It's like, oh, well, how come? It's like, cuz I'm not part of that group. And it does hurt. It's nice to have Sundance. Tom's super sensitive about things. Nice to have Sundance on.

[Gina Grad]

Things. You might need to make the nice with the Huffington.

[Adam Carolla]

Post. Maybe that's.

[Gina Grad]

It. I think that'll.

[Adam Carolla]

Help. Olive.

[Brian Bishop]

Branch.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. And so there's a little. Little bit of that.

[Brian Bishop]

Probably. Why do all your Hollywood buddies hate Adam?

[Adam Carolla]

Nope. Because don't everybody loves.

[Brian Bishop]

Adam. That's the weird.

[Adam Carolla]

Thing. I don't understand that because everybody in my circle bows down to Adam like the same compliment. That part of a culture, though. Yeah.

[Brian Bishop]

Yeah. That's how they greet each other. Some people shake.

[Adam Carolla]

Hands. I love Adam is walking in. Everyone bow. No. Let me tell you guys about how parking folks ought to treat rich people. So here I am. I'm going from the Quail. I'm going over to the 17 mile drive. Tell us about the Chris who likes a model. He's a fringe.

[Brian Bishop]

Player. He's the real star of the.

[Adam Carolla]

Show. But here's the real macaw. I bring him along. It's more of a. Less of a. But here's the reason why you're funny. Because I have an Asian sidekick. Well, you know how you get a rawhide chew toy for your dog? Kind of keep it busy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I kind of do that with my Son with Max Apata. I throw him in the back, but he's a real good hard worker. He eats a lot. I'll tell you that much. He can eat. He really like a roll. He eats the whole. He eats the shrimp tails. After my son is done with the tempura shrimp, he then eats the tails before it gets thrown away. We love a.

[Brian Bishop]

Tail.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. How's he a civic doing? How's a Civic. How is. Oh, civic. I thought you said civic duty. Doing it. No, no. Where would he do that? How is civic Is civic. That's. He stepped. That's in the Smithsonian. He stepped up to a Prius. That's next to Archie's chair. That's a great. Yeah, so it's been retired. Anyway. Now, where was I? So there I am. Does he still have a baby hair? And he called it a beard. A beard. Yeah. Does he have a baby hair? It's. It's baby.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Hair.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. It's weird. It's weird fuzz. Yeah. It's like what a kid's. Like what an infant's born with. But, yeah. He is the only reason why we know. Oh. Oh, Max Apata. Yeah. Yeah. Funny. When my son calls him. That's who you are. But really, I'm very well respected within your community. Very well respected. Very well respected in your community. Yeah. Yeah. If you in the community. The community. Right. Very well respected. If you guys ran Sundance. Oh, man. Oh, so.

[Brian Bishop]

Good.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Yeah. Get a massage while I watch a movie. No, no. You like massage? Yeah, yeah, I like massage. Massage. Yeah. Get a cuticle push and a massage. Sit there and watch my Newman documentary. We'll clean your clothes. Yeah. Separate the wise supplies. Yeah, you should have seen me out. Was. It looked like laundry day the other day at the Quail. We know. We. We follow you on the Facebook. Yeah, it's not. Yeah, well, you know. Oh, no, no, no. You shouldn't. He's really not. He's really not that good. He's really more of just a placeholder until we get another guy in here. Oh.

[Brian Bishop]

No. You turned off the section of your.

[Adam Carolla]

Family. All right, real quick. And then we'll bring our guests in. John, 22, Grand Rapids, Michigan. John. Hey. What's going on? Hey, man. I just read non Taco Bell material this summer. It was awesome. Oh, thank you. All the books are out if you want to go check those out. That was my favorite of book, the.

[Brian Bishop]

Books. Was it the stories and the timeline thing? You know, you structured each to a.

[Gina Grad]

House. That's my favorite couple of Bestsellers of nothing. I.

[Adam Carolla]

Did. Both stories are awesome. I have no idea what stories from what book or whatever, but I.

[Brian Bishop]

Do. It's mostly from your childhood and younger.

[Adam Carolla]

Years. Picking the house and then having that be the next chapter as you move to the next house was a good idea. Take credit for John. Thank you. Yeah. So I'm graduating school here in a year. College. And I did an internship this summer in a probation office. And I enjoyed the job. I like going to court and things like that. But I found that there's a lot of chicken shit tickets. Like, you'll talk about, like, a lot of super high fines for MIPs and things like that. And I'm wondering if I should pick something else to protest, you know, the unfairness. What's an.

[Brian Bishop]

Mip? Minor in possession. I mean, I have no.

[Adam Carolla]

Idea. Wow.

[Gina Grad]

Brian.

[Adam Carolla]

Wow. Idea. Yeah.

[Brian Bishop]

I. Is that right, John?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Minor. I think I got a. I feel like that stuff would. It would drive. There's two things that would drive me nuts. It would drive me nuts on the Johnny Law side with all the chicken shit handed out, and then it would drive me nuts with the deadbeat dads who were putting cigarettes out on their kids and stuff. Like, I couldn't even. I couldn't even imagine. I think I would become depressed. Like, I really do. I. I totally believe in, have a job that's not a bummer. Like, where you're not working around people you don't like and in some environment that, you know. Like I said, talking to Tom Arnold about working at the Hormel slaughtering house. You know what I mean? Like, it's bad.

[Gina Grad]

Times. You'd be a very melancholy correction officer.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. So whatever you think. I mean, I can't tell you how to feel, but I just feel like, God, it would just be a bummer showing up with those people every day.

[Brian Bishop]

If you're serious about, like, fighting the power, you know what I mean, with your career, I suggest maybe work there for a few years. Get to know the system, get.

[Gina Grad]

To know how it.

[Brian Bishop]

Works. And then, you know, go the other way. Like, you know, prosecutor to defense attorney or something like.

[Adam Carolla]

That. Yes, I agree. All right, one last one, then we'll bring our guests in. Brett, 37, Salt Lake.

[Brian Bishop]

City.

[Adam Carolla]

Brett. Ace. Gina Bald Joy Jesus. Thank you. Hey, Ace, I was just wondering. Sonny's getting all this cool exposure to racing and, you know, world class auto. Wondering if he shows any interest in driving. I don't. Learning to drive. He did announce that when he was in high school. In six years, he Was going to learn to drive today for the first time. Normally he just wants to go stare at all the cars, but he's getting. He's getting coached up. He's getting into it. And I think he's not a thrill seeker. He's very, very safe and weird. And he's a weird balance of. He's not a worrywart and he's not neurotic. He's just very. May I go to the bathroom? Is it okay if I have.

[Gina Grad]

A. So like he's a human Honda Civic?

[Adam Carolla]

Yes. Chris is done with him. He's very cautious. He's thoughtful and cautious, but he would never. You know, the first time I got behind the wheel in my dad's car, my only plan was to see if I could get air. Like I wanted to get air underneath that car. There was. There's train tracks on Chandler and a bad part of North Hollywood interview. I knew if I hit it hard I could catch some. Some air. I know the train tracks you're talking about. That's awful. And I just yelled at my buddy. Hang on, Starsky. Oh my God. And I just flew with dad's rabbit. But the plan was to get air, you know, and everybody. My friends were like. I remember. Like, my friends were insane. Like, I remember saying to my friend once. Like, he said, can I borrow your truck to like move some stuff? And I would always give him the speech, which is, yes, but I do not have insurance and I'm a carpenter and that truck is my livelihood. And I don't have another form of transportation. But I also need the tr because I can't work without the truck. So I will lend you this truck for the night, park it at your house, the night, whatever. But be very careful because I need this for my livelihood. And he said, no problem. And I lent it to him on a Saturday afternoon. He was going to bring it back Sunday morning or whatever it was. And as I was driving home with somebody else after a party or something like 2:30 in the morning, just driving, it was raining really hard. Driving down Laurel Canyon, raining hard in the passenger seat. And I look to my right. I'm driving by the Gelson's supermarket on Laurel Canyon and Riverside. And I see a truck doing donuts in the rain because it's a wide open parking lot. They didn't have parking stops or anything. The guy's just getting it sideways and drifting. And so I'm like, God damn, that guy's tearing up. And as I come up to it, it's my truck. And it's my buddy who I lent it to. And it's like, I really. I gave you the entire speech about being safe and taking it easy, and it's my livelihood, and I thought that would have been like, all right, don't put the extra load of books in it. Let's make two trips. You know, we're moving. We don't want to bust a leaf here. Keep it under.

[Brian Bishop]

55. It's Saturday.

[Adam Carolla]

Night. You're just doing donuts in the middle of a parking lot because it's raining. Sonny is not that dude. I'm guessing Eddie Braun, our next guest, who is going to jump Snake River Canyon in Evil Knievel Sky Cycle, is that dude. More likely. More likely. But I'll coach him.

[Allison Rosen]

Up.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Put him behind the wheel, show him the basics and see where he goes. I will. And thank you, Brett, but, God, it's nice. By the way, the kid, we just sleep in the same bad state. The Airbnb, just zero maintenance. Kid just falls asleep. That's the best. Doesn't snore, just boom. He doesn't complain. Does he ask for stuff when he's at events and stuff? This kid goes through the entire Monterey Aquarium and then walks out right past the gift shop and doesn't even slow down. That's my kid, too. Does not even slow down. That's the best. All right. The best. Jo Koy, everybody. Koi Pond. New episodes every week on itunes. And of course, J O k o y. JoeCoi.com is where you go. Can I plug my Instagram? Yeah, plug your Instagram. O K O Y. There you go. All right, Eddie Braun, he's gonna jump now. Remember Evel Knievel? Boy, man, what a story. He tried that thing in, like.

[Brian Bishop]

76. I talked to the model. She said it was actually.

[Adam Carolla]

82. I love that talk about it. He was jumping. That bad boy. He should have died doing it. Oh, definitely. His shoot deployed when he's taking off. Off. And his chute should have just blown out, but it took off upon deploy. It was deployed when he was on the pad. So if the chute just blew out like it should have when he was launching, he should have just been shot into a canyon with no parachute, but it somehow stayed together and hung together enough to just, like, drop him into the water and he didn't drown. I was like, it's insane. He still hit pretty hard, though. Yeah, but it's insane how Evil Knievel did that. That shoot grabbed a hold of a little tree because if it would have fell into the water, he would have been gone too. Oh, right. It's an insane story. Anyway, Eddie's gonna do it, and he's not gonna do it in a newer way. He's going old school. It's a steam rocket. What? Of course it is. We'll get him in here. We'll do it next.

[Gina Grad]

S.

[Adam Carolla]

Man. Skipper in a boat full of booze tickets going fast. This is no time to snooze. So be out against this alcohol to abuse. Come on and get plastered on the ACS cruise. You'll see, you'll see Adam, you'll see, you'll see Gina, you'll see, you'll see ballet Dawson, Ray and gary on the ACS cruise. McGregor's included. Come on and get a.

[Brian Bishop]

Bus.

[Adam Carolla]

But hit the buffet before my dog is.

[Gina Grad]

Dove.

[Adam Carolla]

So much fun you won't want to go back. Maybe in a bikini you can see Gina's rack. So be our guest. We got plenty of booze. Go to Mexico on the ACS.

[Brian Bishop]

Cruise.

[Adam Carolla]

The Adam Carolla show experience. Three day cruise tickets are going fast. Get yours [e-mail]. i don't think Gina's rack's gonna be there. Is.

[Gina Grad]

It? I don't.

[Adam Carolla]

Know. Oh, okay. We're trying to work it.

[Gina Grad]

Out. I'm doing my very best to be.

[Allison Rosen]

There. I.

[Brian Bishop]

See. We're aggressively courting that youth market with those song.

[Adam Carolla]

Parody.

[Brian Bishop]

With the song parody, I'll tell.

[Adam Carolla]

You, if you're there and you're around the pool and that rask's exposed and a seagull drops it just right, something's gonna come out of me. That's all I can.

[Brian Bishop]

Say. What if the cruise director doesn't let you down either? Like extreme side of the.

[Adam Carolla]

Boat. Wow. I just don't. I don't want to take a turn for the sexual. But I'll just tell you that I will promise you something out of me. It's gotta be dropped just right.

[Brian Bishop]

All right, this is Adam Carolla Show 1886. Coming up next, we have Adam Carolla Show 2195, featuring James Harris, Vinny Tortors, Gina Grad, and Brian Bishop from 2017.

[Adam Carolla]

Good day, Gina Grad. Good day to you and bald Brian. Information is a good thing. Yeah, which. And Vinnie Tortorich here, Hashtag. Me too, Vinnie. Vinnie Tortorich is going to coach everybody out.

[Brian Bishop]

There. So contemptuous of women who've been sexually.

[Adam Carolla]

Abused. I like that. Hey, all of a sudden. Listen, it's Hollywood. Sure. It happens to everyone. You don't think it didn't happen to me. What, I'm ugly? I'm chopped.

[Brian Bishop]

Live? Far from it. Put a picture up of the conch shell. You've seen it. You've seen the plate, buddy, I've seen.

[Adam Carolla]

It. You were made to eats off of it every.

[Brian Bishop]

Night. You can't unsee.

[Gina Grad]

It. You were made to do some horrible.

[Adam Carolla]

Things. So. Well, again, it's all should be solved, but it is a very slippery slope. When everything is assault, everything is abuse, everything's physical abuse, everything's sexual abuse, then we cannot sort it out at all. Every female comedian or female star who writes a book, they're gonna get paid millions of dollars. They have to have the story where they were raped in the book. And then the rape story doesn't sound like any rape story you've heard of in the past. And all I'm saying is we have these degrees for everything in life. The reason we have to is because we need to know in life, life the difference between a fender bender and the car being totaled. There is a difference. If we call everything totaled, then it's gonna be really hard for all of us and the insurance companies and everyone to gauge everything. I don't think it's insensitive to have murder, murder one, capital murder, murder with special circumstances, manslaughter. I think we'd like to know the difference between shot in the head while jogging in the park and this guy clipped me when he was backing out of his drive. I was jogging behind him and he was futzing with the windshield wipers. Like we want that difference. And that's all I'm saying about assault. If everything is assault, everything is rape, then nobody knows what. And it's unfair to whoever gets the jogging in the park. Rape because we don't know what is. But again, it's like saying seeing impaired or blind or.

[Brian Bishop]

Whatever. Yeah, it's the same argument which I agree with of like, you know, three strikes laws. Like, you know, the guy was arrested three times for marijuana distribution or intent to sell, when clearly it's not the same thing as having, you know, a serious narcotic or a dangerous weapon or whatever. But these awful under the same.

[Adam Carolla]

You know, I'll give you a better one also, I don't, I'm not. I will do better. Also, the three strike thing for me, I'm mixed about because like his third strike was stealing a bag of Funyuns, a small size bag of fun. He's like, if that asshole doesn't know any better at this point, with two strikes, not to steal the 55 cent thing of Funyuns. Maybe we don't need them around, but better little more Mark Gerrigas than me. The having to register as a sexual predator. Have to be registered. You could have raped a van full of disabled kids and. Or you could be 19 and have consensual sex with your 17 year old girlfriend who's more mature than you are and you're on the same list, same deal. And you could have been taking a leak on your front lawn with a couple beers in you. And exposed could be public exposure. No need to put everyone on the same list because as someone who lives in a community, I want to know the difference between the guy who had consensual sex with his girlfriend of four years even though they were separated by 18 months. I want to know the difference between that and the guy who's at the park luring kids into a van. The predator. Right, Adam, you're into cars. My younger brother has been a car broker his entire.

[Brian Bishop]

Life. And a pedophile. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Oddly enough, one of the same. And he, he tells me, he goes like carfax, it doesn't matter if the car had a scrape. If the insurance company knew about it and it just had like a ding on the door that you claimed on insurance, that in the total is the same thing. Carfax doesn't tell you which one it was. Oh, they got to straighten that out. They just say, but wait a minute. When a car's totaled, like when the insurance company proclaims it's a total, you could do a retitle. That's a whole different thing. That went into a swamp upside out down versus an accident. I mean, they got. There's gotta be a difference between totaled and an accident. I will find out for the next show. Gary's gonna find out. He said, hey. He goes, if it's a scrape, we don't know if it was. Well, we don't know if it was in a bad accident or a scrape but not totaled. If it was total, you have to retitle it. That's. Yeah, that's a retitled car. Wait a minute. You know when you're making an argument and someone starts making your argument mid argument back at you. Sorry, I think you just did that. All right, but I agree. We'd all like to know there's between a little dead defender and the front end taken out and it was repaired not.

[Brian Bishop]

To. When it comes to cars and.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Women.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, so. All right, you know, I have my list of things I'D like to do? Yes. You know, before, like, you know, visit your. Before I die.

[Gina Grad]

Yes. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Oh, you have.

[Gina Grad]

It? I have it right.

[Adam Carolla]

Here. You have that.

[Brian Bishop]

List. You keep her list at all.

[Gina Grad]

Times. You never know what Aaron's going to.

[Adam Carolla]

Ask. Wears a quarter quarterback wristband, and embossed in it is my list. So I will read this.

[Brian Bishop]

List. He's constantly striking things off of.

[Adam Carolla]

It. I'm gonna add two to the list. Two to the.

[Brian Bishop]

List. Refresh some things on the.

[Adam Carolla]

List. Oh, for sure. We're doing the list first. Okay. List first, Gina grad. And then I will tell you. I've just. I sat around last night, I thought, I'm gonna add two life goals to this.

[Gina Grad]

List. It's an ample list, so strap in. Here we go. Over the years, I prepared a list of things I want to do before I do die. Have my hands registered as weapons. Get kicked out of a casino for winning. Jump into a body of water with a knife between my.

[Brian Bishop]

Teeth. Make sure the knife's facing the right.

[Sam Sorbo]

Way. Of.

[Gina Grad]

Course. Have a cape removed on stage. Have a sports jersey pulled over, a nice.

[Adam Carolla]

Suit. Oh, either bought the team or you went number one in the draft. Or somebody pulls their jersey with number one, your number's not number one, but it's number one on the.

[Gina Grad]

Jersey. Be killed by the person I told to kill me if I started to become a zombie. Wipe down a gun. Silently. Communicate. Slash. Point to my watch. Underwater. My.

[Adam Carolla]

Watch. Yeah.

[Brian Bishop]

Underwater. You're doing the dive, but you're trying to communicate the world.

[Gina Grad]

Ticking. Punch out my undercover partner who's about to say something he shouldn't and blow our cover. Play bass in an all black band. Be the only white guy and whisper something on stage to the conga player and then laugh. That's gonna be a tough.

[Brian Bishop]

One. Bass is the funkiest instrument I.

[Adam Carolla]

Know. That's why, man, it's a bass player. He's gotta have the moves, man. He's gotta have a lot of soul. If he's my base in All Black Band and crack up the conga guy who's, you know, his relationship with English is a little tough, so it's hard to get the jokes.

[Gina Grad]

Across. You know who might be closer to that goal than you? Jeff.

[Adam Carolla]

Cesario. He played the Congress. That's.

[Gina Grad]

Right. Put my hand over the mouth of a beautiful woman to stop her from screaming and alerting the bad guys. Get shot at and brush it off, saying, I ain't got time to blow. Be able to say, someone attempted suicide over me. She Threw herself on train tracks. Catch a punch and twist the guy's hand until he goes down to his.

[Adam Carolla]

Knees. That's.

[Gina Grad]

Strong. Literally have a celebrity shorten my name. In an interview, Bobby De Niro says working with Ace was great. Be embroiled in a lawsuit that leads to a heroic story. I broke the leg of a gangbanger robbing a liquor store, and now he's suing.

[Adam Carolla]

Me. Yep, it's.

[Gina Grad]

Good. Stop a crime by throwing something. A guy steals a purse and starts running. I throw a can of corn football style and knock a track someone. I dismount my horse, then do that low squat. You blaze.

[Brian Bishop]

Out. Track.

[Sam Sorbo]

Someone. No, this is part of.

[Brian Bishop]

It. Oh.

[Gina Grad]

Standalone. Where I pick up a clump of dirt, let it sift through my fingers. That's how he's.

[Brian Bishop]

Tracking. Okay, I got you.

[Adam Carolla]

Thinking. When I'm tracking somebody, hawk a.

[Gina Grad]

Championship belt or super bowl ring at a pawn shop. When I hit rock bottom, shout, release the hounds. Be lost in the Utah desert with a hot chick. Then come across an old Indian guy and speak his language. Oh.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. When she sees me, she'll Navajo she's so.

[Gina Grad]

Impressed. Pull a fake mustache. Pull a fake mustache off someone and shout, aha. Have a hot towel on my face at a barbershop with a cigar sticking.

[Brian Bishop]

Out. That's doable. That's doable. You can cross that one off.

[Gina Grad]

Today. Dislocate my shoulder to get out of a straight jacket. Snap Larry King's suspenders and turn him into a pile of.

[Brian Bishop]

Ashes. Time's running out on that.

[Gina Grad]

One. Shout not on my wall. Watch. Direct a movie called awesome so that entertainment shows will have to refer to me as awesome. Director Adam Corolla. Then follow it up with a sequel. Hung like a rhino. Drive a car off a pier into a garbage.

[Adam Carolla]

Barge. Yeah, I got to make the leap. Oh, I got to add, for.

[Brian Bishop]

Some reason, they always get lift off the end of the.

[Adam Carolla]

Pier. I have a super squeamish passenger who's like, no, not as I floor it. Hang on. I yell, we get air. That's good. Onto the garbage.

[Gina Grad]

Barge. Be stripped of a crown. Yeah. Tell my team to synchronize watches. Dry shave with a machete. Yeah. Pull down a surgical mask and say, there's nothing I could do. Or beat someone on the chest and shout, live. Damn you. Box a kangaroo. Demand unmarked.

[Brian Bishop]

Bills. We got a live show going in Australia. You could pull off the box.

[Gina Grad]

Kangaroos. My grandfather did that. He lost. Drape a suit jacket over the handcuffs in front. Drape a Suit jacket over handcuffs in front of you like John Gotti. Oh.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. I'm sure that you're being asked. So nobody.

[Gina Grad]

Knows. Perp walk, Fend off a Kodiak bear with a.

[Brian Bishop]

Torch. The idea of the draping thing so you can have a dignified wall surrounded by cops and lawyers. Yeah.

[Gina Grad]

Sure. Pop the locks off an attache case full of money and slide it across a table. Be tied to a chair with a hot chicken chick. Have to choose between cutting a red wire and a blue wire and finally fight someone on top of a moving train. Yeah, all good.

[Brian Bishop]

Ambitious. All.

[Adam Carolla]

Good. I good thing you waited age.

[Brian Bishop]

50 something to start.

[Adam Carolla]

Them. Do you just live in a movie? Some of these are from certain things I may have seen before. Inspired by after you hear. I have one more. After you give these two, I think I have one for you. Okay. All right. I would like two things I'd like to do like a sports. Be an analyst. Like a sports analyst. And be sitting at the desk with the three or four other former.

[Brian Bishop]

Jocks. The studio.

[Adam Carolla]

Show. Yeah, the studio.

[Brian Bishop]

Show. Not a game play by play, but like studio.

[Adam Carolla]

Show. Right? Yeah. And I'm sitting there and they're all wearing their finely tailored suits and have somebody not too much just at home comment that my upper arm was taking up the entire sleeve of my jacket. Oh, wow. You ever see those guys? You. When you see guys like sleeves aren't tapered. Yeah, they, they literally the guy's upper arms. When you see those NFL wrap up shows and you see. Oh, like a guy Lewis. Oh, Ray Lewis is one of them. The other guy, Mark.

[Brian Bishop]

Slayer. Yeah, These are all types of.

[Adam Carolla]

Guys. These are all perfect. One is the Outside backer from SC, the perennial All Star, William.

[Brian Bishop]

McGinnis.

[Adam Carolla]

McGinnis. The top of their suit jacket is taut.

[Brian Bishop]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. They don't make jackets with big enough gun spaces for these. And they're sitting there at the table and they're not flexing or anything, their hands are just sitting at the table and it's like literally taught the upper part of their things. Like how big do your arms have to be to take a shoe.

[Brian Bishop]

To be stretched into his mat out A suit? Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. And it's not like they took it in or anything, it's just taking up the whole.

[Brian Bishop]

Space. Yeah, it's made for a normal sized man's arm. A normal, a man's normal size arms. But there's Willie McGinnis, you know, outside linebacker for 12 years in the.

[Adam Carolla]

NFL. All right, second, I want to be. You want to Be that. I want that to happen now. I don't. No one comments to me. Someone is at home commenting, look.

[Gina Grad]

At that guy, how he fills that.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Out.

[Brian Bishop]

Bizarro. Adam Corolla is commenting on Adam Carolla's.

[Adam Carolla]

Arms. No, I'm not.

[Brian Bishop]

Commenting. No, I'm saying the version of you who's watching.

[Adam Carolla]

You. No, no, some dude. Somebody's watching. Yeah, some dude. Possibly a chick. Yeah. Be better if it was. It'd be nice. Speaking of chicks, I'd like to be watching one of those commercials for the peloton bicycles, the ones of the stationary bikes where they have like the hottest chicks in the world who sweating profusely and just going nuts on top of this bicycle. And then have somebody comment on one of those models. And I look up casually and go, oh, I banged her. It was that one. Okay, now also, you tell me, you know I have the phoniest chick in the world. The phoniest chick in the world. This is. I'm piggybacking on this. The phoniest chick in the world is the pretty hot chick. She's 42, but she's wearing the glasses and her hair's not blown out or anything, you know, but you can tell she's got the bones, you know, she's good looking. So who's faker? The chick who's sitting at the breakfast table when the props start coming around and she's leaving through. She's got done making a Denver omelette for a man. And he comes walking in the kitchen and he says, yeah, Prop 82, I'm gonna vote for that. And she went, but have you read the fine print? I've read the fine print. And then she goes to explain to him the hot chick who just got done making the omelette goes into great detail about all the props that she's read every single letter of every cod and everything and memorized it, is now going to coach her husband up on Prop.

[Brian Bishop]

182. Sure, it sounds like a good idea.

[Adam Carolla]

Right? And then, then goes into it that chick who's faker. I don't know if we're getting much better than that. That chick. Or again, the peloton or whatever it is. You got to show me the cycling. You got to show me that peloton cycling. Yeah, they're always looking at the watts at the end doing that. The hottest chicks in the world, they live at the goddamn Guggenheim. Like the inside of the house is just a modern art master. Frank Lloyd Wright invents this goddamn place. And at some, at some point we're seeing the. We're seeing the wrong one, but this one's probably still good. Go ahead and show piping hot chick sitting in the middle of a modern art museum. She's going nuts on this bike. And it's got to be 6am because at some point, at some point the kids and the dad are holding a cup of coffee and she's, you know, she's going to spring off that bike and make everyone flapjacks in an omelet. But they just take the best looking people in the world, put them on the bike, have them going. Now. I don't know why she has kids. She's 26. I don't know why she has a nine year old. And I don't know where the husband is. And the house is amazing. And then every. At some point the guy comes downstairs and she gives him a hey, that a boy. And it's this.

[Brian Bishop]

Chick. The guy stumbles.

[Adam Carolla]

Up. What's all the noise? And then her whole move is like, oh, I gotta, I gotta hurry and make breakfast for everyone in the family because I don't want to get into trouble.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. I feel like she might have some sort of disorder.

[Brian Bishop]

Yeah. You know, addicted to working out.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. I'm just saying. Who's the 26 year old with the 9 year old who does nothing but make. Make breakfast and living in the Guggenheim? I show me the other one where that has all the hot chicks and she's like, they're down there just sawing away. Yeah. Every morning. Yo. Here's a more realistic depiction of the hot chicken. The dude gets up at 9:45 and she goes, what are you doing? And he goes, I've got to brush my teeth. Do it in the other.

[Brian Bishop]

Room. You have to do it so.

[Adam Carolla]

Loudly. I gotta go to work. Well, brush in the other room. And then she goes, ugh. And then her head goes back to the pillow. What are you.

[Brian Bishop]

Doing? You're tying your.

[Adam Carolla]

Shoes. These are not the commercials I'm seeing. Sorry. This is a. The next one's just a bevy of hot models on those bikes just looking piping hot and sweating away. All right, faker. This is probably it. Faker. Faker person. The chick who's up at 5:45 pedaling her ass off for an hour and a half and then making breakfast for the family inside the Guggenheim. Or the aforementioned. I read every stitch of Prop 182 and let me coach you up, husband. On what's going.

[Brian Bishop]

On? Gina, you should have some insight into.

[Gina Grad]

This. Yeah, I think. And Vinnie probably has some insight into these fitness freaks. I think it's much less likely that after the Denver omelette, the. The woman sits down and does a PowerPoint presentation on Prop 182. Yeah, I think these chicks, if they want to stay in the Guggenheim with this life, they better get up at 5 and start doing.

[Adam Carolla]

This. That's a good point. And that's what they do. You're absolutely right. I'm so. There's more of hot model, but remember, hot, hot model and mother of two. Like, she's got, hey, man, got a couple young kids there. They have to pop out a couple of kids. That's how they keep the checks coming. And after the 10 year, you.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Know.

[Adam Carolla]

Look, I can write a whole book on these chicks. All right, so you're saying chicks, they don't read the props, but they do work out and they do have the kids. And again, is she popping off the bike and making scrambled.

[Gina Grad]

Eggs? Yeah, but after that, everyone goes to school and husband goes to work. And where does she go? She meets her friends for lunch. What's her.

[Brian Bishop]

Vibe? This is a very small sample to be speaking from, but Chrissy goes to bar method, like first thing in the morning. She loves it. Like, she's like, oh, get up.

[Adam Carolla]

And go to bar.

[Gina Grad]

Method. She did that when she was nine months.

[Brian Bishop]

Pregnant. Cardio.

[Adam Carolla]

Bar. Yeah, it's cardio.

[Brian Bishop]

Bar. Dance workout training. She doesn't dance, but it's like with the bar and with the whole, you know, stretching and all that.

[Adam Carolla]

Stuff. They took the poles from 10 years ago and made it.

[Brian Bishop]

Horizontal. She goes at 6 in the morning, comes home. I don't think she does anything, but she goes straight to the pan and starts making eggs.

[Adam Carolla]

I had this horrible thought when I was thinking about this. I said, I bet Christy does some of this. She does a version of this now, man. Right. Christy Wang. Six in the morning, these chicks are handing them off to, you know, Consuelo and they're going off to Starbucks. It crossed my mind that Christy may engage in this sort of behavior with his perfect.

[Brian Bishop]

Life. Another discussion of.

[Adam Carolla]

Props. Give me, give me. I knew it. 6am sorry. And then off to work and then mix the eggs and off to.

[Brian Bishop]

Work. Yeah, right.

[Adam Carolla]

Away. Eggs for who? For.

[Gina Grad]

Everyone. Well, but wait, she's just. What? She's just taking people's appointments at a nail sale salon?

[Adam Carolla]

Huh?

[Brian Bishop]

Meaning. What was.

[Gina Grad]

That? Is that she's.

[Adam Carolla]

Being. She's keeping. She's being facetious. And then you're supposed to say, no, she has a very good job. All.

[Brian Bishop]

Right. Very.

[Adam Carolla]

Successful. Let's go.

[Brian Bishop]

Vinnie. Leader in the.

[Adam Carolla]

Field. What you had you wanted to add to my list. I'm adding to Adam's list. For Adam, you, before you die, you want to be running away from something with a woman and you have to grab the woman's hand to help her along because obviously two people can run faster when you hold hands. Grabs that hand. Yeah, there is that move. It's good. It's good. Yeah. I always, you always wonder about that in a movie. Like he's always two steps ahead of her, but he's grabbed her hand anyway. But unclear how that's.

[Brian Bishop]

Working. It's really kind of slowing him down. Group.

[Adam Carolla]

Down. If it did work, they'd probably do a little of it. When they did the relay race, instead of just handing the baton, the other guy would grab the other guy's hand and drag him. I mean if you could pick up a little.

[Gina Grad]

Speed. Legged.

[Allison Rosen]

Race.

[Brian Bishop]

All right, this is Adam Kroll Show 2195. Coming up next we have Adam Carlos Show 2186 featuring Kevin Sorbo, Sam Sorbo, Jim Ross, Gina Grad and Brian Bishop from 2017 with Gina's epic nine story news segment. Check it out.

[Adam Carolla]

And now Alcoa presents Definitely not a Jew on the Adam Carolla show. Dateline, Glendale, Arizona. A 44 year old man faces charges of disorderly conduct and indecent exposure after he allegedly urinated on a family sitting in front of him at a Metallica.

[Sam Sorbo]

Concert.

[Adam Carolla]

Definitely not a.

[Brian Bishop]

Jew.

[Adam Carolla]

Kevin Sorbo and his beautiful wife. San Sorbo in studio. She likes that feature. Yeah, it's a good feature. Thanks to good people from Alcoa for sponsoring all these years long running sponsor Let There Be Light, name of the movie in theaters this Friday, October 27th. 300 theater release. Congratulations. That's a, that's a big release. I mean not big Guardians of the Galaxy, but for an indie with no.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Money. We didn't have 250 million dollar budget, so we didn't have the budget.

[Sam Sorbo]

That you had to put together this tremendous man cave that I'm sitting in right.

[Adam Carolla]

Now. This place is amazing. Well, you know, I gotta say, like as a guy who's made a few independent movies, just having a release these days is a good, that's a good thing. That's not straight to DVD or straight to vod. And then also three, you know, they'll do the way they do it is they'll do one in two in Chicago, three in la and Four in New York and see if it trickles out to the rest of the country. So 303. Nice. How do you arrive at 300 and who's making the.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Decisions? Want to take that one?

[Sam Sorbo]

Apparently it's all on my shoulders. No. I put together a team to guide the distribution of the film and it was based on the amount of money that we had and it was a matter of timing. So we had some extra funds that came in, so we bumped it up from 250, but we're comfortable at 3. We're actually over 300 now and we're hoping that it grows after that because the movie's really good. If you go on the website lettherbeelightmovie.com and you watch some of the testimonial videos, we've got so many people who are just gushing about how moving and how uplifting the story is and the movie is. And so hopefully it'll grow from the three something that we.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Have. And you know how this is. I mean, it really comes down to word of mouth. I did a movie three years ago. It's called God's Not Dead. It's a little 2 million dollar movie. It made over 70 million US alone and it's 20. It started on 700 screens and by the third week it was up to 2000 screens. That doesn't happen. I mean, that just kept going up. It was pretty.

[Adam Carolla]

Amazing. Well, you know, there's this thing that I constantly think about which is my sort of, you know, so it's my sort of restaurant theory, which is like, if there's a street and it's covered with Mexican food joints, then open a Thai food joint and stop trying to compete with all the other Mexican food joints. And Kirk Cameron's been smart this way. Tyler Perry made a couple shekels this way, which is like going, not everything's gotta be the darling of Sundance. We can find this group of people that is being ignored. I know you're religious, I know you're conservative. Those people don't really have product. Hollywood is not cranking out.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Product. They forget about the flyover states. Right.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. And so you and Kirk Cameron's done the same thing where they go, hey, let's create product. Product for these people who are feeling underserved. And that's where the word of mouth takes.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Place. I've done a number of like, either you call them faith based or family friendly type of movies and I used to get stopped all the time because of Hercules or Andromeda. It was a 12 year run between those two shows. Now I go through airports. 80% of the people coming up now, please make more family friendly movies as I'm going through Dallas, Atlanta, whatever. And it's amazing the difference that has happened over the last four or five years in terms of people saying what they want me to keep doing. So it's out there just some matter of getting the word out there. We don't have. We're not in every movie theater showing trailers. We're not on tv. So it comes down to people, sorry, the man.

[Adam Carolla]

Cave. But the. Yeah, no, it's, it's this weird. It's so weird if you live in LA because and you're in this business, you don't think it other. It's like you don't know. What I'm saying is you don't think other opinions exist. You're so, so doused in your Steve. It's not even a vacuum. It's like it's a vat. A vat. You're swimming in a vat of like your own opinions. And so when somebody like, it's an echo chamber, it's an echo chamber. Like my sister, I remember a million years ago, she worked at a salon in Silver Lake on Hyperion Boulevard. So it's like the center of the gay universe, where all the thousand points of gay lights converge. Was Hyperion at this place. It was a salon. So I said to my sister once, she was like 25, I said, what percentage of population you think is gay? And she went, 90%. Now, the Corollas didn't excel at math in her world it was 100%. If you watch TV today, you would think that. So you go, oh, we don't want to make a movie for these guys. Everyone's making, making those moves. But then you step outside the bubble. And again, I think it's why everyone here and on each coast when Trump got elected, everyone's like, oh my God. What? No, no one here knows a conservative vote for that guy. So smart. Smart to make product for those people. But is this something. And I know it's slightly newer for you, but were you always a religious person? Well, I've always been a.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Christian. I'm just not. Probably not the best one in the world. Cause I don't force my beliefs on.

[Brian Bishop]

People.

[Kevin Sorbo]

People. I have atheist friends, I have agnostic friends. I don't get angry about disagreeing. I just get to me it blows my mind. These atheists I see on tv, they're so angry about something, they don't believe in they're offended by a nativity sign or his cross. Look, I don't believe in broccoli, all right? Knock yourself out. It's weird to me. I don't get it. Well, I mean, to me, I'm a live and let live guy. If someone's asking me a question, I'll go for it. But I meet people that don't believe in it. I don't get upset. I just go, hey, look, if I'm wrong, I've lost nothing. But if I'm right, see you later. So it's a. To me, it's just. It is what it.

[Adam Carolla]

Is. I'm an atheist. And part of my thing was I never wanted to burn a calorie. Being an atheist, like the idea of going to a meeting or protesting in front of the courthouse because they have the Ten Commandments posted or something, I thought, this is a huge waste of my atheist. I'm an atheist. I agree. And also, I tend to feel like, whether it's you or Dennis Prager or whatever side you're on religiously, I tend to like those people more. I tend to feel like I like my kids to hang out with their kids more. I like where their head's at. I like what they're practicing, hopefully what they're preaching. I tend, as an atheist, tend to be more attracted to those people because of their.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Values. I might be going way on a limb here, but I think the Ferguson and all the deaths in Chicago and Baltimore riots, I'm guessing most of them probably weren't religious. It's just. Just a guess. It's just a hypothesis, hypothetical.

[Adam Carolla]

Situation. I like that they're a bunch of. I live in a town that has a bunch of churches. I drive past them every day drunk. Never seen the Internet, suckers. But I like it. I like that the community's into.

[Brian Bishop]

It. Tie things right.

[Adam Carolla]

Here. And I got. And, you know, I kind of grew up with that weird taste in my mouth too, because when you atheists, again, it becomes a religion and it just becomes an anti religion religion. And again, not believing is fine, but then turning that into something, it kind of reminds me of, like when PETA would say, like, hey, man, we shouldn't slaughter these whales for their oil. And I'd go like, I'm down with that. And then they'd throw paint on celebrities wearing faux fur. And I thought, now you're jumping the shark a little. And I kind of felt the same way. And as someone who says he's an atheist, they try to recruit me, like hey, we're doing a rally. Like, we want you to get in on this. And I don't, I don't like that at.

[Kevin Sorbo]

All. We don't want to invite you to church, but we want to invite you to the movie theater. It's easier to do that for.

[Adam Carolla]

People. Let there be light. Sam, am I right that you wrote this? I co wrote it, yeah. You co wrote it. And how does, so how does one, how does one begin this journey? Like, do you sit down and go, I want to write a movie or do you have an idea and then do.

[Sam Sorbo]

It? I had the idea and I thought, okay, this would be a movie that I want to see. Hollywood turns out a lot of stuff and most of it I'm not interested in watching. And I kind of got fed up with that. And in fact, I developed a faith based television series the year before and got that as far as NBC and Sony, who bought it and then they decided not to produce it. And so I was sort.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Of. Because it had God in it.

[Sam Sorbo]

Maybe. So I was just sort of pitching around and I thought of this idea for the movie and I thought, okay, the one thing that I learned is I can't do it myself because I need somebody with some Hollywood clout to be a co writer on the script. So I called Dan Gordon, who's an Oscar nominated writer, Hurricane with Denzel Washington and Wyatt Earp with Kevin Karl Costner. And I said, hey, Dan, I have an idea for a movie. Would you consider writing it with me? To which he of course said no, because he's a really well known Hollywood screenwriter. And then he said, let's have lunch. And when it, when I told him the idea, he was in from the beginning. And then about two weeks later, Sean Hannity called Kevin and said, hey, I want to do a faith based movie with you. Do you have anything? And so the three of us flew to New York and pitched on for about half an.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Hour. And he wrote a.

[Sam Sorbo]

Check. And he wrote a.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Check. So we started filming four months later in.

[Sam Sorbo]

Delaware. This is not, this is not the typical to say, this is not how this is done. I can't explain it. It's pretty cool that I'm sitting here less than two years later with a.

[Adam Carolla]

Movie. What was Give us the premise in a.

[Sam Sorbo]

Nutshell? The premise is the world's greatest atheist who goes around proselytizing.

[Adam Carolla]

People. Angelette.

[Sam Sorbo]

Stars. No, no, he's an active atheist. He's not a lazy.

[Adam Carolla]

Atheist. He's like a.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Dawkins. He's like a hitchens He's a world renowned guy and he has a.

[Sam Sorbo]

Near death experience and he sees something that just doesn't jive with his worldview. So he has to make sense of that. And he basically, basically spirals out of control. It's a story about. It's a love story, it's a story about fatherhood. It's a story about hope and forgiveness. And it's got a very uplifting message, which is the kind of, that's the kind of entertainment that I look for, is something that, where I leave the theater going, oh my gosh, I'm gonna be a better person tomorrow. Or, you know, I'm just gonna, I feel better about myself or something. I've identified and I see hope and that's what gets me to go to the theater. So I'm hoping that's what gets other people to go to the.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Theater. There's a lot of storylines, there's a lot of characters. I, I mean, look, I love Avengers too, with all the visual effects, but a lot of times you walk out of there, about 47 buildings just fell down and about 800,000 people died. But we don't talk about that. But to me it's like these are characters that people will be able to relate to and I think they'll enjoy.

[Adam Carolla]

It. So again, in theaters this Friday, the 27th, 300 theaters. And what you should do is go to the website lettherbelightmovie.com and if you go there, then you can find out where the theater is. I'm guessing that's correct. That's near.

[Allison Rosen]

You. You have correctly.

[Adam Carolla]

Discerned. I don't do a lot of releases myself. I'm a VOD man. But I do understand how the.

[Allison Rosen]

Kids are going to.

[Sam Sorbo]

Be. But for us, you'll go to the.

[Adam Carolla]

Theater. For me, I'll pack up those damn kids and take them to the theater. I agree with you. I like when something's a little uplifting, makes you think a little bit and feel a little bit better. I think there's this part where something happened with art where you had to struggle for your art or you had to be this tortured, miserable soul. Look what's coming out of all of the movies. Yeah, I don't like Bummer Mo. There's many movies I haven't seen. Just because I've realized, like, I think I'm gonna be in a bad mood when I, when I leave that, when I leave that movie. And it's probably in a weird way why I like a movie like Defending youg Life with Albert Brooks so much because it is an uplifting movie. Gives a kind of positive talks about. Really what you need is courage. The universe wants you to have courage and strength. And I love the sort of spoiler alert. But at the end where he breaks loose and runs to the next tram and they're all watching, going, well, there's courage. Good enough for.

[Gina Grad]

Him. Good.

[Adam Carolla]

Enough. Like I. And I just. It just spoke to me. All right, let's do a little news. Gina Grad. And you guys hang out and say whatever you want. Give me the news with Grad. News with Gina Grad. Breaking viral. All those crazy Trump tweets. Give me news with Gino. Graduation, Trouble in the Middle East, Celebrity drunk meltdown. Seek. News with Gina. Gina. The news with Gina.

[Gina Grad]

Grad. Well, the speculation is over. Justin Timberlake is the super bowl halftime performer. He confirmed it with a tweet on Sunday that included a video from his buddy Jimmy Fallon. And it said halftime and halftime. It will be Timberlake's first time on stage at the big game since he was an accomplice in the infamous Janet Jackson wardrobe malfunction, also known as nipple gate in 2004. Super Bowl 52 takes place on February 4th at U.S. bank Stadium in Minneapolis. Thank.

[Kevin Sorbo]

You. My.

[Gina Grad]

Hometown. Oh, yeah, you're in.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Minneapolis. I was just home last week. I saw the Vikings beat up on the.

[Adam Carolla]

Packers. Are you going to Super Bowl?

[Kevin Sorbo]

I'm. I'm hoping to go to the Super Bowl. I hope they get there. They need a better offense, but their defense is very, very good.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Roger out of.

[Brian Bishop]

Commission.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Shouldn't have ramped up him up. That was my argument. Now, I know the hit was legal, but I don't like the wrap up. All right. Yeah, I was just in Minneapolis.

[Gina Grad]

Too. Wasn't it place to be? Yeah, you were just.

[Adam Carolla]

There. I love that town. It's a good.

[Kevin Sorbo]

City. It.

[Gina Grad]

Is. Well, a guy in Canada, we talk a lot about the.

[Brian Bishop]

Law.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes. You know what Timber likes to do if he has any kind of sense of humor at all? It's like when he's talking to the super bowl people and they're doing like the wardrobe stuff. He's just wearing super tight dolphin shorts pulled up a little too high with no underwear, and he's like, yeah. So I'm going to come out, I'm stage ready, high boots, kicking up, kicking up to the. Kicking up to the sky. And he's going to do it and his sack's going to like fall out and he's going to go, don't worry. That's not going to happen during that show. We'll address.

[Brian Bishop]

That.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Yeah. All.

[Brian Bishop]

Right. He.

[Gina Grad]

Might. He's actually. He's a funny dude. Well, a guy in Canada got really lucky when he won $6 million in the lottery and then tried to press his luck by hiding it from his wife and then making a run for it. So just four days after Maurice Tybalt secretly won. Won the $6 million, he packed his bags, took his passport, and left home. The couple had, at that point, been living together for over two years. So in court, Maurice's wife, Denise, said she and Maurice together dreamt about winning the lottery, planning on buying muscle cars and estates in the country. Denise. Denise also remembered that maurice did about 15 loads of laundry of all his clothes, everything he owned. The night before he took off, as though he were preparing to.

[Brian Bishop]

Leave. Is my ski mask.

[Gina Grad]

Clean? He won in secret and he peaced. Yeah, she couldn't see that.

[Adam Carolla]

Coming. So how does it work in Canadian law? She get half. Like, California. She gets.

[Gina Grad]

Half. They're together.

[Brian Bishop]

Yeah. The marriage is an asset.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. He gets to keep the 15 loads of.

[Adam Carolla]

Laundry. I wonder if they screw you over there like they do here, where they go, what's the lottery up? The powerball's up to $100 million. Somebody won, and then they go, all right, would you like $47 million or would you like $10,000 a day for 121 years? I wouldn't pay you that well. How about the 100 million? Like, whatever's up on the tote board, Whatever you guys are talking about in commercial. I'll take.

[Sam Sorbo]

That. How did he think that he could get away with this? He's literally married to her legally. That's just ridiculous. And then he. And how's he gonna collect the money and not have her? Like, just real.

[Gina Grad]

Dumb. Hey.

[Brian Bishop]

Honey. And you just saw for.

[Adam Carolla]

Me.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Yeah, it's like radar and mash, right?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. The great thing about dumb people, when dumb people run into cash, they can never hide their. They can never hide it because, like, I picked up a Bentley, I.

[Gina Grad]

Always wear these gold leaf.

[Adam Carolla]

Sweatshirts. You or your mason. Well, I saved my money. Like, they always screw up and the feds always catch them, and everyone always catches them because they can't not get a car and put fur on the outside of.

[Sam Sorbo]

It. I gotta say, I'm sorry to admit this, but I kind of hope that she sues in court and gets.

[Gina Grad]

The whole lot of it. Yeah, that'd be.

[Adam Carolla]

Nice. Right?

[Gina Grad]

Right. And that they don't waste it all on.

[Adam Carolla]

Lawyers. The irony is all gonna be.

[Brian Bishop]

Gone. It will all be.

[Allison Rosen]

Gone.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. Well, the bleach report says that Boston Celtics point guard Kyrie Irving has reportedly been fined $25,000 for yelling profanity at a Philadelphia fan who asked him, Where's LeBron? After the Celtics defeated the 76ers on Friday.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Night. He gets that much per.

[Adam Carolla]

Dribble. That's nothing. So.

[Brian Bishop]

It'S. Let's all guess what. His.

[Adam Carolla]

An. It was.

[Gina Grad]

Lovely. It's a little hard to hear, but here's the audio.

[Brian Bishop]

Kyrie said.

[Gina Grad]

That. Suck his dick. That's what he said. Yeah. So he acknowledged the outburst, but when he asked if he regrets it, he simply replied, Hell, no. 25,000 is.

[Brian Bishop]

Nothing. Hey, man, show. Where are the.

[Adam Carolla]

Juggies? Suck their titties. I mean. Okay, that sounds great. Thank you. I love the show, by the way. Yeah. I don't know. I feel like if somebody heckles you, you should be able to heckle them.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Back. Sure, why.

[Gina Grad]

Not? Why does he have to take the high.

[Adam Carolla]

Road? Yeah, I agree. And they're not politicians. They're athletes. Who cares? And it just makes for more.

[Brian Bishop]

Fun. If they always hide behind. The excuse is always, hey, he paid for his ticket. He paid for his ticket. Say whatever he wants. Like, oh, he should be able to. If you say something, it might be set back to.

[Sam Sorbo]

Him. He was asked a question and he gave an answer. I don't see a.

[Gina Grad]

Problem. He would have been rude to ignore the.

[Sam Sorbo]

Guy.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Exactly.

[Brian Bishop]

Exactly. We're in a homosexual relationship.

[Adam Carolla]

And mathematically, a lot of the guys in the NBA can be down on the court and still get a blowjob. Even if you have a cheap seat. You're right. Even if you have a balcony. I can't believe you went there. I'm sitting right here. You're.

[Gina Grad]

Right. He's not used to having a lady in the room. Well, President Trump might have his first Challenger in the 2020 presidential.

[Adam Carolla]

Election.

[Gina Grad]

Election. Mark Cuban, the billionaire owner of the Dallas Mavericks and star of TV's Shark Tank, says he's seriously considering running for president in 2020 and would challenge Trump for the Republican nomination. In an interview with Fox News, Cuban said he's been thinking about it for a while and hasn't completely made up his mind. He says, I wouldn't run unless I have solutions. If I have solutions, then I have something to offer. If I don't, you won't see me anywhere near being a politician. He describes himself as socially centered, interest, but fiscally Conservative, socially, that shocks.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Me. I know Mark and I also thought he was sort of a liberal and we've had interesting conversations. That's interesting to.

[Adam Carolla]

Me. Well, I love him because when my movie came out the Hammer, I think he. His company, was it.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Magnolia? Magnolia.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. They offered me a.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Dollar. There you.

[Adam Carolla]

Go. That's cool. They didn't give you a very.

[Gina Grad]

Good valuation on Shark Tank. He's a sharp.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Businessman. Is there no more Weinstein stories in there? Is that all dead now or something? I've got my sexual harassment story. Really? Yes, Wanna hear.

[Gina Grad]

It? Yeah, more than.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Anything. Gianni Versace. Oh really? I was living in Italy at the time and I was dating way before I met her name is Sam. So I say it's bs, it's before Sam. So I was doing some commercial work and some fashion work and I met Versace. He wanted to meet me because my height at six three, he wanted me doing his fashion shows with these six foot tall women. And so I get invited. I'm in my apartment in Milan, I get a call, I go, hello. He goes, ciao, Kevin, it's John. I go, johnny. He goes, versace says, the car waiting for you, come to my party. So I go to this party, I meet Sophia Loren, Pavarotti, I mean Richard Gere. I'm a don. I mean everybody. It's unbelievable. Next night he calls me again. Another party, like 15 people at dinner. Next night calls me again. Four people. Next night calls me again, just Johnny and myself. Johnny. So we're sitting there at this, this little restaurant, mind you, he went San Babola, he made the final.

[Brian Bishop]

Four.

[Kevin Sorbo]

I'm in the, I'm in the championship.

[Adam Carolla]

Game.

[Kevin Sorbo]

So we're sitting there talking and I knew he was talking about his campaign. I'm gonna put you in gq. You'll be famous everywhere. All my commercials, all a sudden his hand goes on my leg. And I said, dude, you know I'm straight. He goes, this is why I like you. You're, you're not a girly man. You were a men's man. And I said, well, there's just no way it's to going to happen. And he said, oh, in life you must everything. He said, you must do. The dog and the cat and the boy and the girl, you must do. I said, johnny, look, you're on this road. I'm on this road my whole life. He says, I build a.

[Adam Carolla]

Bridge.

[Gina Grad]

Wow. Really brings people.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Together. The bridge was never built. And I never got the campaign.

[Sam Sorbo]

But. And it's weird because Trump says.

[Adam Carolla]

He's going to build a wall. That's right. You built a wall around your junk, and he's trying to build a parade. I got four free.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Dinners. It was all.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. Wow. Sad that just 11 years later, Kevin had to hire that gay guy to kill him on the show. Obviously, he doesn't speak about that. So sad. So sad. I'll. I did not do that. I will. No, no. You paid the gay. You didn't do it yourself, obviously. Don't get your hands. Get your hands dirty. Kevin Sorbo over there. All right, let's do another. All.

[Gina Grad]

Right. Well, speaking of fashion, Tommy Hilfiger just launched Tommy Adaptive. It's a clothing line specifically designed for disabled consumers. The clothing features things like adjustable seams, Velcro magnetic closures, and openings that make it easier for adults with mobility issues to dress themselves or for caretakers to assist them. None of this has been at the expense of fashion, of course, with everything from jean skirts to dresses to chinos, bomber jackets, everything. The look, it looks almost identical to the, quote, regular sportswear offerings. And it is Tommy.

[Adam Carolla]

Adaptive. I had this thought the other day. Anything more uncomfortable and sort of less practical than a jean jacket? Like, jean jackets have been around for a million years, and everyone loves them. But they're weird. I don't like them. Not good.

[Gina Grad]

Right? Not comfortable, not flattering. Boxy.

[Adam Carolla]

Silhouette. Here's a thought. Will I ever wear a jean jacket ever again? The answer may be no. Ever since I got that one that Kimmel gave me that you can smash up and put it inside a sandwich bag. And then I wore it in your own Minneapolis. Oh, did you? We're walking down to Kramer Czech's over there, the Polish joint, to have some pierogies and be a little chilly in the.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Wintertime. Be a little.

[Adam Carolla]

Chilly?

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. Wait, it's a collapsible denim.

[Adam Carolla]

Jacket. No, it's a jacket. I mean, not the one I was looking at Dr. Drew and he was wearing. No, no, not. Sorry. No. I will never wear another denim jacket since Kimmel got. Got me his jacket. Not a denim jacket. Sorry. Since his jacket, which is the.

[Brian Bishop]

Chrissy, has one of these super lightweight.

[Adam Carolla]

Down ones that mash into the match into nothing. You shake them out, and it's like a garbage bag that kind of doesn't feel like it's anything. It's a garbage bag. It's awesome. Also, I feel about fashion. All we do is go back and revisit times that we made fun of 35 years earlier. So what are we really doing? And Is anyone designing anything that, like, I do men's suits. Men's suits are the same. They've always been the same. And we can all realize that whatever people were wearing in Italy in 1922 is about the height. And they would just get one of.

[Gina Grad]

Those. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. Well, it goes.

[Sam Sorbo]

Around. What goes around comes back around. But they still have to make money. And so they are going to try to convince you that the suits today are completely different than the suits five years ago. And that's why you need many more of them. And it's the same with everything in fashion. They have.

[Gina Grad]

To. Well, it's like an iPhone. Like, you have to have pleats or. It's horrible. Oh, God. Get rid of those pleats. Like, they just decide every couple years.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. I don't like that they come with an extra button because I've never in my life used the extra button that comes with the suit, the jacket button. I've never used it. But I cannot throw it away. I have a whole box. You'd be an insane person to throw it away. But it's never been used, and it's just floating around my desk drawer. The other one they do is I'll wear a jacket for years and then realize they stitched a pocket clothes. They put a stitch, like, I don't know, think of the corner doing it to your eyelid or something, or like you're on a maritime disaster before they send you the Davy Jones locker. They put the stitch in there. All.

[Allison Rosen]

Right.

[Adam Carolla]

Anyway. And then also people think. I have thoughts like, hey, do you want. Want the. In the back of the jacket? Do you want the one flap or do you want the double? Do you want the double or the one? And I say the same thing that I say to the barber. You want the back of your head round or you want it square? I'm like, however you like it. I don't see.

[Sam Sorbo]

It. I never look at the back of my.

[Adam Carolla]

Head. I always say, what is it now? And then he goes, it's kind of in between. I'll keep it that way. You ever get a barber that critiques your last haircut, except for he did it? And it's a weird thing for you to go, you know, that is your work that you're crapping all over. Yeah. The last guy, I don't know if he didn't have the right equipment or he's a little distracted. It was you. It was.

[Gina Grad]

You. Well, earlier this week, actually, the end of last week, Southwest Airlines flew their very first unmanned flight. According To Yahoo News. And by unmanned, I mean that the entire crew was female. The captain, the shh. The co pilot, the flight attendants, all women. On October 18th. 18th from St. Louis to San Francisco. They even tweeted a picture of the unmanned.

[Sam Sorbo]

Flight. And it must have been voyage for my birthday. You know, Sam was my.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Birthday. I was just down Southwest. And the flight attendant had a pretty funny thing to say about. Oh.

[Sam Sorbo]

Yeah. If you. So if you want to inflate your vest, blow into this tube. And if you want to deflate it, consult the New England patriots or Tom.

[Adam Carolla]

Brady. That's.

[Gina Grad]

Good. Southwest always tries out their material. That's good. Thank.

[Adam Carolla]

You. Like an uncomfortable conversation for the captain and the co pilot to have with the Southwest stewardesses, or what do we call them now? Flight attendants. Like, they had to be going, awesome, right? That it's. We're all. Look at us. It's just women. Just. And then they had to be like, well, you guys have kind of always been doing your thing back there. We're sort of the awesome part of this. The only part that was there.

[Brian Bishop]

Have been many, many, many, many flights that have.

[Adam Carolla]

Come. Many, many, many that have three chicks back there serving up the.

[Brian Bishop]

Drinks. Really, the up here part.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. But we all did it together. Doing this for a.

[Gina Grad]

While. This kind of my first.

[Adam Carolla]

Time. I just say we're all here and it's hard to really sign an order to.

[Sam Sorbo]

Anybody. It's kind of sexist to point it out.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Frankly. But the funny thing is when they talked, when they talked about the flight and taking off, they put on the man voice like.

[Adam Carolla]

This. They all do.

[Kevin Sorbo]

That. Is there some school for.

[Adam Carolla]

That? Or every pilot, their authoritative.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Voice. You know what I mean?

[Brian Bishop]

Yeah. It's like Christian Laitner, like high fiving Michael Jordan and Magic Johnson on the dream team. We did it.

[Gina Grad]

Again.

[Brian Bishop]

We kind of did.

[Gina Grad]

Well. Dating site saucydates.com hold on.

[Adam Carolla]

Brian. I never brought this up, but Brian sent. I was literally talking to Matt Porson, Punisher and seeker of pleasure. We've expanded his nickname. Fondelier Enjoyer of winter. Enjoyer of winter over there. About flying Southwest and about switching some flights around. When you sent over an email as we spoke about. About some deal with Southwest for locals. But I never really got to the bottom of.

[Brian Bishop]

It. Oh, this is a good on the air conversation. Southwest is having a really, like, remarkable deal where at first it was just targeted. Like if they sent you an offer, if you sign up for their credit card and you live in California, you'd get their companion Pass for a year, which is two for one flights for wherever you go, which is really valuable. Thousands of dollars on how much you fly. And then they expanded it to everyone in California and it's on their website, which is crazy. So I suggested to Matt and I emailed you and Fondelier and August. I was like, hey, considering how often Adam and August and all of us really fly on Southwest Phoenix and Reno and everywhere, Vegas and all this stuff, we'd be stupid not to get this deal because we cut our flight costs in.

[Sam Sorbo]

Half. And it's good till the end of the month.

[Adam Carolla]

Right?

[Brian Bishop]

Yes. Yeah, it is. You can sign up through the end of November. I'm not getting paid for this obviously, but the deal goes for you get the Companion Pass for the next.

[Gina Grad]

Year. Well, there better not be a finite number of these because you just told me everybody. Yeah.

[Brian Bishop]

Right. There's on their website. They probably want people to sign.

[Gina Grad]

Up. Alright, we'll do.

[Adam Carolla]

It. So we'll get going on.

[Gina Grad]

That. Well, dating site Saucydates.com surveyed more than 22,000 international members to find out which countries had the best lovers, which would be a 10. And the worst lovers, which would be a 0. According to the survey respondents, the best male lovers can be found in 1, 2, 3 countries. Any.

[Adam Carolla]

Guesses? I said say it's going to be the places that do that have the least innovation and make the worst car interesting. If they make cars at all.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Guam. That makes a great.

[Adam Carolla]

Line. Yeah. Like yes. Places with the kick ass space programs and the autobahn burner cars. And maybe Italy will get there. I'll say none of these places will have a. A space program. Right. That's my argument. That's my argument.

[Gina Grad]

That's. That's solid and we've talked about this before, but surprisingly they need a wine.

[Brian Bishop]

Country. I'm gonna say.

[Gina Grad]

Chile. The best male lovers can be found in Australia, South Africa and the good old usa. Number three, the best female lovers. Hold.

[Adam Carolla]

On. No, no space program. The first two that I'm.

[Brian Bishop]

Aware. Let's check with Gianni Versace and see who we.

[Adam Carolla]

Think.

[Gina Grad]

Female. The. The top prize went to Canada, France, Italy and for the worst. This is interesting.

[Adam Carolla]

Wait. Yes. The female is.

[Gina Grad]

Female'S. Canada, France, Italy and usa.

[Sam Sorbo]

Canada. That's why that Canadian chick was so upset that her lover absconded with the.

[Gina Grad]

Money. Right. So this is weird. Australia made the very tip top of the list. New Zealand at the bottom. Wow. The worst male lovers, they ranked higher than. Oh for male and female. Female. So they ranked it about a 6:22 000 people who took the survey, the lowest in the female love department were Australia and Spain. So Australia, the guys, yes. The girls, not so.

[Brian Bishop]

Much. Kevin, where did Hercules New.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Zealand.

[Gina Grad]

Average?

[Kevin Sorbo]

I was the only one that lifted up.

[Adam Carolla]

They brought in a ringer.

[Gina Grad]

Yep. Well, let's just stay on the sex theme for a little bit. Doctors are finding that the number of middle aged men who injure themselves while having sex is on the rise. And they say adventurous sex is to blame for the spike. Most of the injuries are occurring in the shower, including neck injuries, wrist fractures, ankle sprains and back.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Problems. There's no traction. Yeah, there's no.

[Gina Grad]

Traction. Doctors are also finding that more and more people are suffering hernias when the muscles are of the pelvic region becomes.

[Adam Carolla]

Strained. Yeah, the thing I, you know, they're really doing.

[Gina Grad]

It. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. All other sports, other physical activities let you know when things aren't, you know, like pick up basketball games and stuff. Your body kind of lets you know.

[Gina Grad]

Right. You're not up to.

[Adam Carolla]

It. I remember seeing like, I remember seeing some, I don't know if it's a guy or a girl. I can't remember if it's in my improv troupe or something, but it's like both knees, like the skin removed from both knees, you know, And I said, what'd you do? You fall off your scooter or something? Like, no, I was having sex all night last night and it was like on the carpet. Just wore it off, you know what I mean? Come on, come.

[Sam Sorbo]

On. He fell off his scooter but he wanted a better story to tell.

[Adam Carolla]

You. It's a good point. This guy was like the sex. The point is he wasn't from.

[Brian Bishop]

New Zealand, I can tell you.

[Adam Carolla]

That. You get.

[Sam Sorbo]

This.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, no, she wasn't. Oh no, he wasn't. That's right. Australia is what I'm thinking of. But it struck me that you cannot experience pain when you have a boner this way. Or at least it cuts it down quite a bit. And thus, because any other activity, like if you're watching TV and someone just showed up with the scrubby side of a sponge and attempted to remove the skin from your knees. You'd feel.

[Gina Grad]

It. Yeah, it would be the.

[Adam Carolla]

Worst. You wouldn't just start bleeding and then they'd move on to the next one. So I think it makes you think you can do things you can't do. And also you don't experience pain. The kind of pain you would experience if you were just, you're outside and you're cleaning the gutters out and you feel a stitch in your side. Like you get off the ladder and you stop, but in the shower you go, I can power through. I'm going to dig this out. Yeah, that's.

[Kevin Sorbo]

Right. Because you're shocked you're having.

[Adam Carolla]

Sex. You're shocked you're having sex. I'm going to shock, literally. So I think that's where the injuries really. That makes.

[Gina Grad]

Sense. Yeah, absolutely. Well, some number crunchers over at ESPN thought it would be fun to figure out just how much food it took to feed an entire NFL team. They visited the Buffalo Bills and got a sense of what's going on in that Cafeteria. So there's 53 players on each active roster, 10 players on the practice squad, many of whom weigh more than £300. And then there's the coaching staff and the support staff. So in order to feed all of them, it takes 1500 pounds of meat and more than 500 pounds of vegetables per week. The meals are really heavy on the protein. Kitchen staff cooks 24 rotisserie chickens a day, which breaks down to about 700 pounds of chicken a week. They also import 600 pounds of grass fed beef from New Zealand and serve more than 250 pounds of fish. And all that doesn't even cut down count. With the smoothie bars and the shakes. They do about 60 of those a.

[Brian Bishop]

Day. Did you ever have team dinners before games like pasta feeds and things like that carbo.

[Adam Carolla]

Load? No, I wear. We did. We never did that. We just went to. There was like a place called like the subcontractor. Somebody go there and get us sub sandwiches or something before the game or like just me and five guys from the team or.

[Brian Bishop]

Something. The couple years I played football before the Friday night, four games on Saturday. Pasta for dinner. The whole thing is for the cafeteria. And just spaghetti for.

[Adam Carolla]

Dinner. Oh, really? Well, we would always play Friday nights, so maybe that screwed it.

[Brian Bishop]

Up. We didn't have lights, but we. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Saturday. Oh, we didn't have lights. We were in a neighborhood. Nighttime football is always.

[Brian Bishop]

Awesome. Yes, it was always awesome. We got to go to another team's stadium and play on Friday night. That was.

[Adam Carolla]

Sweet. Then the weird rare occasion when it would rain. I would always look forward to that too. All right. Predictable Gina Grad, but still interesting. Let's bring it.

[Gina Grad]

Home. That'll be the name of my autobiography. I'm Gina Grad and that's the.

[Adam Carolla]

News. Gina, Gina. That was the news with Gina Grad.

[Brian Bishop]

All right. That's adam K Show. 2186 for everyone that misses Gina's news. Hope you guys enjoyed this episode. That does it for Coral Classics this weekend. Until next time, Hul and Get It.

[Adam Carolla]

On. Support is available 247 with VRBoCare. We're here day or night, ready whenever you need help. Because a great trip starts with the right.