Grown Men on Bicycles are Ruining America + Comedian Nate Jackson

Summary

Summary of "Grown Men on Bicycles are Ruining America + Comedian Nate Jackson" – The Adam Carolla Show

Podcast Information:

• Title: Adam Carolla Show
• Host/Author: PodcastOne / Carolla Digital
• Episode Title: Grown Men on Bicycles are Ruining America + Comedian Nate Jackson
• Release Date: June 24, 2025
• Guest: Comedian Nate Jackson

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1. Introduction and Guest Overview

The episode kicks off with Adam Carolla introducing comedian Nate Jackson as the guest. Adam highlights Nate's upcoming Netflix special slated for July 8th and discusses Nate's recent performances at the Wiltern Theater in Los Angeles.

Adam Carolla [03:12]: "Nate Jackson super funny. It'll be out July 8th on Netflix."

2. Nate Jackson's Netflix Special and Live Performances

Adam and Nate delve into the significance of performing two shows at the Wiltern Theater, a venue known for its large capacity and Art Deco architecture. Nate expresses excitement about performing there, comparing it to other comedians who headline massive venues like the Dodger Stadium.

Nate Jackson [04:49]: "Thank you for your perspective because you have, like. I don't know if this is good for LA or not."

Adam emphasizes the achievement, noting the theater's capacity of approximately 2,000 seats, making Nate's two-show schedule a substantial milestone.

Adam Carolla [04:48]: "If you can do two shows at the Wiltern, that is a big fat tip of the cap, because that place is big."

3. SNAP Benefits and Energy Drinks Controversy

A significant portion of the episode centers around a contentious NPR article discussing the use of SNAP (Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program) benefits by families to purchase sugary drinks for their children. Adam vehemently criticizes the portrayal of affected families, mocking the article's depiction and questioning the authenticity of the featured mother's circumstances.

Adam Carolla [09:47]: "So the mom has $7,000 worth of fucking tattoos on her arm. So maybe she should have carved out a little their tat cash and put that aside for some eggs and some beef."

The conversation highlights the tension between governmental support and personal responsibility, with Adam advocating for healthier, home-cooked meals over processed foods funded by SNAP.

Adam Carolla [11:50]: "But now Kennedy Jr. and he's like, kids are fat, kids are unhealthy. ... you don't want your fucking kids eating that stuff."

4. The Impact of Bicycle Culture on Society

Transitioning to broader societal issues, Adam introduces the topic of "dudes on bicycles" as indicators of societal decline. He laments the aggressive behavior of cyclists who monopolize road lanes, attributing this trend to the green movement's emphasis on environmentalism.

Adam Carolla [36:06]: "Introducing dudes on bicycles... They're taking up a whole lane and fucking blocking everybody."

Nate and Jason Mayhem Miller join in, discussing how such behaviors reflect a lack of respect for traffic laws and broader societal norms.

Nate Jackson [38:54]: "Dudes on bikes... It's a spectrum."

5. Tipping Etiquette and Personal Experiences

The dialogue shifts to the complexities of tipping in various service industries. Adam recounts his experiences with inconsistent tipping expectations, particularly contrasting service at a Home Depot versus a Starbucks.

Adam Carolla [57:14]: "We have a weird society where I could make. I could make ... No tips on the guy at Home Depot, but tip for Starbucks."

Nate and Jason share their perspectives, debating appropriate tipping amounts and the rationale behind tipping certain service providers over others.

Nate Jackson [60:44]: "It's not like I'm not. I'm not ..."

6. Skepticism Toward Chiropractors and Massage Therapy

Adam critiques the effectiveness of chiropractic services compared to traditional massages, humorously suggesting alternative remedies for back pain and relaxation.

Adam Carolla [63:40]: "Chiropractor without the crack. I don't think they got business."

The conversation includes playful banter about massages, happy endings, and the awkwardness sometimes associated with massage therapy.

Nate Jackson [66:45]: "He."
Adam Carolla [67:14]: "He was like, what did she even pay?"

7. Comments on Celebrity Personalities: Ellen DeGeneres and Margaret Cho

The episode features a segment where Nate discusses a podcast interview where Margaret Cho criticizes Ellen DeGeneres, labeling her a "mean girl." Adam joins in, expressing long-standing disdain for Ellen's demeanor and leadership style.

Margaret Cho [73:07]: "And not nice to me for most of my career..."
Adam Carolla [74:51]: "I have been talking about Ellen being a bitch for 20 years, but I don't mind it."

They compare Ellen's treatment of guests and staff to other show hosts, emphasizing how personalities can shape workplace environments.

Adam Carolla [80:07]: "Every production takes on the personality of the person that's hosting the show... And you go, 'Don't touch Dave.'"

8. Inheritance and Family Land Disputes

Towards the episode's end, Adam and Nate share personal anecdotes about inheritance, discussing conflicts over family land and property. Nate narrates his family's struggle over an eight-and-a-half-acre property in Lacey, Washington, highlighting the emotional and financial tensions it has caused.

Nate Jackson [92:09]: "I would say like eight and a half acres in Lacey, Washington. That I think needs to be... keep it in our family."

Adam relates by recounting his own limited inheritance experiences, emphasizing the absurdity and humor found in inherited items like a Tony Bennett CD.

Adam Carolla [95:12]: "The Tony Bennett CD was mine. I gave my dad... but it's autographed to me."

9. Final Thoughts and Conclusion

As the episode wraps up, Adam and Nate reflect on the importance of appreciating achievements and not taking things for granted. Nate expresses gratitude for the opportunity to perform at significant venues and acknowledges the support from the audience.

Nate Jackson [100:30]: "I just try not to take things for granted... appreciate that game."

Adam reinforces this sentiment by comparing it to valuing one's health and the simpler aspects of life.

Adam Carolla [100:44]: "Be thankful for that thing. The reason you're having an argument is because there's something right."

The episode concludes with Adam promoting Nate Jackson's Netflix special and upcoming live shows, encouraging listeners to support the comedian.

Adam Carolla [101:10]: "Nate Jackson, you got shows all over the place. ... come back anytime."

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps:

• Adam Carolla [09:47]: "So the mom has $7,000 worth of fucking tattoos on her arm. So maybe she should have carved out a little their tat cash and put that aside for some eggs and some beef."

• Nate Jackson [04:49]: "Thank you for your perspective because you have, like. I don't know if this is good for LA or not."

• Adam Carolla [36:06]: "Introducing dudes on bicycles... They're taking up a whole lane and fucking blocking everybody."

• Adam Carolla [74:51]: "I have been talking about Ellen being a bitch for 20 years, but I don't mind it."

• Nate Jackson [100:30]: "I just try not to take things for granted... appreciate that game."

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This episode intertwines humor with sharp societal critiques, leveraging Nate Jackson's comedic insights to explore topics ranging from personal success and societal norms to the intricacies of daily interactions like tipping and the impact of lifestyle choices on community dynamics. Adam Carolla's unfiltered commentary provides a candid and engaging listening experience for audiences seeking both laughter and thoughtful discussions.

Transcript

[Adam Carolla]

All right, in this episode, comedian Nate Jackson. Very funny. Back in studio, Mayhem's got some news, I got some stories, and we'll do all that right after this. Hey, this is Adam Carolla from the Adam Carolla Show. Betonline continues to be your number one source for all your sports betting action. Baseball's in full swing. Football is right around the corner. And Betonline's got you covered with the latest odds, breaking news and live scores. Betonline and even has live in game betting. While the games are being played real time. From MLB to UFC to tennis to NFL futures, Betonline, that's the place to play. And between games, hit up the Betonline casino. Packed with top Vegas style games, poker and live casino. Betonline has it all. Sign up now and score big with VIP rewards, level up bonuses and weekly cash bonuses bet online. The game starts here. All right, here's the deal. I don't need Glow in the Dark anything. I need peace, quiet and a place to sit. But apparently the kids want energy shots that light up like a laser show. So here we are. Introducing 5 Hour Energy Glow Motion. Same jolt as your morning coffee, zero sugar. And now a bottle that glows under UV light. It's 2 ounces. That's it. You blink and it's gone. Just like your dignity after singing karaoke. Great for ravers, gamers, marathon runners, or anyone who who needs to stay vertical through a PTA meeting. Go to FiveHouseEnergy.com and grab the new Glow Motion flavor. Or wait till it hits Amazon in June. If you're the kind of person who also waits six months to see a movie, your friend's already ruined.

[Dawson]

From Corolla One studios in Glendale, California, this is the Adam Carolla Show. Adam's guest today, comedian Nate Jackson. Plus the news and trending topics with Jason Mayhem Miller. And now when he goes nuclear, it's usually over. Red turn arrows. Adam Carolla.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, get it on. Got to get it on. No choice but gonna mandate you get it on. Thanks for tuning in. Thanks for telling a friend. Very funny. Comedian Nate Jackson. That's in studios. Got a Netflix special. It's coming out very soon. I'll tell you when it's called. Nate Jackson super funny. July 8th is when it comes out. Tour dates coming up. The Will Turn theater is amazing. Beautiful. Big, big space out here in Los Angeles with an incredibly creative name, the Whiltern Theater. You know where that comes from?

[Nate Jackson]

No idea.

[Adam Carolla]

It's on the corner of Wilshire and Western Boulevard. Thus the Wiltern Are you serious? Yeah. How fucking boring is that? That.

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah. I thought it had something to do with the Wilbur in Boston. I didn't know.

[Adam Carolla]

No, Wilbur is great. Played there. Played Will Turn as well. It's great.

[Nate Jackson]

Is it nice? I haven't been inside of it yet.

[Adam Carolla]

It's art deco. It's big. It's beautiful.

[Nate Jackson]

Okay.

[Adam Carolla]

It's fun.

[Nate Jackson]

I'm excited. Yeah. We have two shows Friday there, so.

[Adam Carolla]

Two shows?

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah. So I'm excited to see. What.

[Adam Carolla]

Who else is on the headline or on the bill over there?

[Nate Jackson]

That's me.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, just you?

[Nate Jackson]

That's just me.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, the reason I'm asking, if it sounds condescending, is the Wiltern is huge.

[Nate Jackson]

And two shows, I don't know the capacity.

[Adam Carolla]

It's 2000 or something like that.

[Nate Jackson]

Oh, it's a little one. No, that's good. We did Houston a couple days ago and it was like 3,500 at the bayou Music.

[Adam Carolla]

Really? And we as you. It's like a royal week.

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah, but I have a team, so.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, we have a winner. But you're not. Cedric the Entertainer's not coming out after you.

[Nate Jackson]

No, I'm the guy.

[Adam Carolla]

You're the guy. That's what I'm talking about.

[Nate Jackson]

That's what we work so hard for.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, if you can do two shows at the Wiltern, that is a big fat tip of the cap, because that place is big. And I mean, I'm gonna say, if memory serves, at least like 1800-2000 seats. You know, it's probably accordions a little bit. And if somebody says, we need two shows, there's on one night.

[Nate Jackson]

You had two on Friday.

[Adam Carolla]

Two on Friday. That's huge. That means thank you.

[Nate Jackson]

Thank you for your perspective because you have, like. I don't know if this is good for LA or not. Every other match is like, Jo Koy and Fluffy are doing Dodger Stadium. I'm like, I must suck. I don't know.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, Fluffy, Well, Joe Coy. I mean, friends, good dudes. Yeah, both. Both very good dudes.

[Nate Jackson]

I think Joe's from Tacoma, too.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, that's right.

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah, sure, we go.

[Adam Carolla]

Very unlikely place for Joe to come from. Will turn venue 4,000, top end. It's not 4,000.

[Nate Jackson]

4,000.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't know what top end is.

[Dawson]

They're saying they can't arrange the seating. That That's a concert.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

That's for standing. Yeah, yeah, sure. Yeah.

[Nate Jackson]

But I don't know.

[Adam Carolla]

I said 18 to 2000 is what I seem to remember. But either way, two concerts, a lot of tickets, a lot of asses in seats. And that is huge. Over 2,000. So. Yeah, yeah. I mean, Joe and Fluffy have a kind of an audience where obviously Fluffy has the Hispanic audience. And that's a Southern California, Louisiana thing. So that's Dodger Stadium comes into play. Joe. Joe's funny, so he has an. No, Joe. Joe has his own on. You know, we're at that place where people have. There's a Les. Kathy Griffin had her lesbian audience, you know, Margaret Cho. I got nobody. I got a handful of racists. That's all I got.

[Nate Jackson]

I think you got everybody, man.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, you know, it begs the question. There are certain people who may be, I don't know, maybe a Seinfeld type or something, or, you know, Dave Chappelle. They just have everybody. Seinfeld, Dave Chappelle. And then there's other comedians who have a group. They're people. Could be sexual proclivities, could be race, could be a religion.

[Nate Jackson]

Right, right.

[Adam Carolla]

You know, Russell Peters has his own group.

[Nate Jackson]

You know, that's his Indian audience.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. So, you know, I don't know. Whatever. Whatever puts the fannies in seats.

[Nate Jackson]

What does your audience look like when you look out around above the crowd?

[Adam Carolla]

I don't know. I can't tell. They're all wearing hoods. Once in a while, I'll get a guy to pull up a hood.

[Nate Jackson]

I stopped by one, but the fire in the corner was. So I had to head up.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, they burn his stuff over there.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Well, you're the only guest.

[Nate Jackson]

Hilarious. No, so mine is like. It's like 25% of everything. It really is. Like, you know, there's just as many.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

What were your marketing efforts?

[Nate Jackson]

Are black people? I mean, I said, just put me in front of anyone that wants to laugh.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, did. Was the crowd work stuff? Is that what Cat Fire with you? All the hits? Yeah. With the crowd work stuff.

[Nate Jackson]

And I've. I've. I've made my quarrels with it, but at the end of the day, that's exactly what it is. If I ask the crowd, would you guys like 24 years of cute, manicured material that. With. With beautiful punch lines weaved in and. And callbacks and intricate things that connect to each other with wordplay? Or would you like me to abandon all of that and just talk shit for an hour and a half? And they're. They are screaming for the latter.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Really?

[Nate Jackson]

Yes. The only other time I get some of the first option back is I go, what about a mix of both? Like, yeah, but.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah, so it's a crowd work set then. Oh, that's cool. All right.

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah. But I don't know if I do what I would have always seen in clubs coming up as crowd work, where like, oh, you ran out of material, so you just start rip with somebody. I'm really like, I'm looking for the source material to set up to make a setup. Then I make punchlines and act outs and stories and callbacks. And if any two stories from different people come, I weave all of it back together. So, yes, it's groundwork, but I'm building a set off of their lives. Someone's a dentist now. We got teeth jokes.

[Adam Carolla]

And people want to see. I mean, where they know you from, they go online, they see the crowd work stuff, they show up.

[Nate Jackson]

I agree.

[Adam Carolla]

And they sort of go, that's what I want. But you know, look, if they go see Jennifer Aniston do a standup set, they want friends jokes, you know, that's kind of. I don't. That's who we are.

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

As a. As a society.

[Nate Jackson]

Well, I think once you've gotten one thing established, they'll give you the grace to dabble in something else. Like, for instance, Andre 3000 is playing the flute and sold records.

[Adam Carolla]

Really?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah.

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah. Or, I mean, let's be honest, if Chick fil a dropped a burger, we'd be like, I mean, they do chicken so well. Let's try it.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, yeah. Well, that brings me to food, which is good. Cuz I see that in your standup as well.

[Nate Jackson]

A little bit, Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

A little bit.

[Nate Jackson]

At least it was.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, at least in the clip I saw. Let's put it to you that way. So somebody tweeted me something that is insane, but I think it's how Trump trolls people. NPR came up with an article. So snap is basically what we used to call food stamps.

[Nate Jackson]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

Which. What my family had. Well, not really. My mom was on food stamps. I guess we were on food stamps. Food stamps had rules about stuff you could buy and couldn't buy.

[Nate Jackson]

Right.

[Adam Carolla]

We had a stray runaway cat named Norman who lived in our house with us.

[Nate Jackson]

Okay.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't know why he chose the no air conditioning food stamp house to hang out in. You think he could have figured out something that had a little air conditioning and no food stamps? But he came. He had low self esteem, so he came to our house and he lived with us. And I remember going with my mom when I was a kid, and she was trying to buy cat food for Norman and they said, no cat food with Your food stamps. And I remember as a nine year old, kind of going, all right, I get it, this food's for you. I mean, it's for you. Feed your kids. Cat's kind of a luxury item. But Norman would get his food, he'd get his cat food. My mom would just buy cat food out of whatever money, probably welfare money, but she would buy Norman cat food. Norman had a sack of cat food, but she would get the other food with this food stamps. And now food stamps is SNAP now, or EBT or whatever it is.

[Nate Jackson]

Chat ebt.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, so now they want to. But now Kennedy Jr. S in there, Robert Kennedy Jr. S in there and he's like, kids are fat, kids are unhealthy. They're all pre diabetic, they're all drinking too much shit, and they need to get back to something healthier. So I'm not gonna authorize. So the government can kind of dictate what you buy with snap. So when I pass a McDonald's in Pacoima and it says we take food stamps, actually jack in the box somehow bothers me more. But I see a jack in the box, I go, we take food stamps. I'm like, no, no, you should be cooking. If you don't have money, make food. And by the way, that's not healthy. You don't want your fucking kids eating that stuff.

[Nate Jackson]

Plus, if you cook it, it lasts.

[Adam Carolla]

Longer and it'll be healthier and it'll be cheaper. Buy a sack of beans, sack of rice, some eggs, some ground up beef, cut up an onion. Make something healthy. And as I've said a million times to everybody, when they go, they're getting pissed off because you can't buy soda with Snap. And it's like they go, my kid wants. Nobody fucking said you couldn't buy it, right? They just said, we're not paying for cigarettes. You may smoke. Buy cigarettes if you would like. We're not paying for cat food. We're not saying you can't have cat food. We're saying you could buy cat food and we'll buy the beans and the rice. So now there's this article somebody tweeted me the other day, which is just insane because there's a thing going on in our society, which is Trump and Kennedy have now turned NPR and anyone else, they're all against them, so now they're insane. So when they say sane things like we don't want to use SNAP to buy shitty drinks to poison kids, right? Then they have to come out. Then NPR has to come out the long article about why they need to. This is npr. I grew up with these hippies. My mom is a hippie. She would have been, you know how against Red Bull or Rockstar. My hippie ass mom would have been feeding kids colored red dye number whatever with tons of corn syrup. You know, fucking against. They would have been. I think we have the picture, but it's a fucking article. It's NPR making the argument for kids to drink Rock star and red bull at 8am every day. All right, so first off, the picture says this mother relies on SNAP to help feed her kids. Now she's bracing for cuts. First off, the mom has $7,000 worth of fucking tattoos on her arm. So maybe she should have carved out a little their tat cash and put that aside for some eggs and some beef. That's number one. Listen, anyone has a ton of tats, I don't want to fucking hear the part where you don't have disposable income. And by the way, not even disposable. I don't want to hear about that part where you can't make your fucking insurance payment. You can't. You have fresh tats. You understand? You got money. Unless you suck the guy's dick for the tat. I'm all ears. In which case I'll go get my tattooing gun.

[Nate Jackson]

I don't have a lot. Mayhem is tatted.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't want to tell you what I had to do to get this.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm saying have all the tats you want, but don't ask me for money to buy you milk. You got tats, you got money for something. Okay? That's all I'm saying. Number one. So the article. Dawson can read the article, but it's NPR's very, very worried about her kids being judged at school.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

A big status symbol in my high school was cocaine. So we used EBT to get snap.

[Adam Carolla]

Should pay for cocaine.

[Dawson]

For her teenagers, soda and energy drinks occupy a unique role. It's kind of a social currency for them.

[Adam Carolla]

She says, all right, hold on. This bitch has never said the phrase social currency in her motherfucking life. This dumb chick with the tats, she didn't say social currency. NPR writer said social currency. She said it's good and stuff.

[Dawson]

Her 17 year old daughter Olivia confirms this dynamic.

[Adam Carolla]

This dynamic, okay?

[Dawson]

I feel like when you walk into first period in the morning, everyone has like a Red Bull, an energy drink. It's a social construct for sure, says Olivia.

[Nate Jackson]

Social construct.

[Adam Carolla]

Now, now this Nobody talks this way where they're from, on welfare.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

That.

[Adam Carolla]

That's not how they talk. That's how npr. This is an NPR article. This is how. Who wrote this article. Because that's how she talks. Cartia Riddle, Cardia riddle, Cartier riddle. That's how that bitch Katya. Katya. Katya riddle talks this way and she's grafting it over. The dumb people who don't talk this way.

[Nate Jackson]

She talks to the riddles will look.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Down on her if she don't have a Red Bull energy drink in homeroom.

[Adam Carolla]

Also that. The Red Bull or the Rockstar, whatever. That shit ain't cheap. No, right.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

$3 like can of soda. Yeah, I know.

[Adam Carolla]

Do you think the fucking homeroom teacher wants 30 kids beaked up on these fucking chemicals and caffeine?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Probably not.

[Adam Carolla]

Not being able to bounce it off the fucking walls. Okay.

[Nate Jackson]

If you don't have the money, you do things that make it look like you do. So if all of this is what this is and you want to look like the rest of the kids, you get one fresh Red Bull on Mondays.

[Adam Carolla]

That's right.

[Nate Jackson]

And you keep that can, preach. And you fill that can back up too. That's right, back up Wednesday. And you act like you got energy.

[Adam Carolla]

That's what I do with white wine when I drive. That's right.

[Nate Jackson]

There you go.

[Adam Carolla]

That's right. You're right. Sometimes vodka, but that's right. I see where your head's at with that. Yes. Okay, first off, okay, listen, I'm old. I'm old. But I'll bet you in today's America you're allowed to walk in your first period with your fucking books and, and sit down and start doing your shit without the ridicule and judgment because you're not drinking a fucking Red Bull. I'll bet you'll make it. I'll bet you'll make it unscathed.

[Nate Jackson]

Right?

[Adam Carolla]

I'll bet if you came in there, which is a canteen with water in it, you'd probably get a little more that of boys than you would for all the fucking weak ass dumb shit people drinking their energy drinks. But okay, according to the Riddler and this argument on NPR, Robert Kennedy Jr. Has to make sure that we pay for sugary chemical shit drinks to poison kids. Otherwise they're going to be ostracized for not drinking junk in the first grade or in the first period, even though you're right. Find a hollowed out can, fill it fucking tap water and. Or bitch, you can buy it. You can buy it. You can get a part time job. You can do what we all did. Your mom can get a job, not get a tattoo, but get a job and buy you some sugary shit so she can poison you. But that'll be her fucking business. But I'm sorry, the article continues.

[Dawson]

Some of her peers come to school with Starbucks drinks that cost nearly $7. A luxury she cannot afford. But having a Red Bull she says makes her feel more normal.

[Nate Jackson]

How much is a Starbucks cup?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, there you go. Cup free.

[Nate Jackson]

Get a Starbucks cup and stop at a.m. p.m. And get some 25 cent coffee.

[Adam Carolla]

That's right. Yeah.

[Dawson]

I would never be able to be a part of that social pyramid if we didn't have the SNAP benefits that would pay for those.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, suck my dick, you fucking lying idiots. You would never be part. So if the government doesn't buy you Red Bull, you'll be ostracized from your friends in high school. Shut the fuck up.

[Nate Jackson]

She's not even going to suck your dick unless everybody else is already sucking your dick for status.

[Adam Carolla]

That's right. Or tell your mom to stop sucking off the tattoo artist and see if he'll give you a fucking Red Bull instead of a thrush muffler woodpecker.

[Nate Jackson]

Shout out to shout out to your mom for taking that extra step to make sure that the cat is good. Yeah, that's what I heard from that I'm like, oh, you got a cool mom.

[Adam Carolla]

Chris Corolla. She didn't do a fantastic job with her kids, but she did a good job on the cat. You know, you're right. You're right.

[Nate Jackson]

She saved the cat.

[Adam Carolla]

She saved the cat. Even sent the cat to college. I don't know if you knew that. Not so much for the kids. All right, so anyway, according to npr, we're now against. But here's the whole point. NPR is not against this and they're not for this and they've always been against this. NPR does not like Red Bull or Rockstar. They're the opposite of their huge corporation that fucking gives kids chemicals that they don't need and sponsors motorsports and extreme sports. NPR is not interested in any of that. They just got baited into supporting that because Kennedy said he didn't want it. Do not be fucking idiots if some and it's going to be held against you. There's certain ideas that Kennedy has that are good and then ones that may not be. Feel free to vet those and then pick on them. But we just fooled NPR into supporting big sugary drinks, that's all. And by the way, no kid needs any of that shit. If they want, they may partake, take in it. And I'm with you on the can. Buy one can, suck it up on a Monday and then just fill it at the drinking fountain.

[Nate Jackson]

Fake the funk the rest of the week.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes.

[Nate Jackson]

I mean, at the end of the day, it's about status, what I saw. So it's never going to be enough. The day you got your one can, the rich kids go get two.

[Adam Carolla]

Do we really think you're going to be thrown out of your social circle for not having a Red Bull in your first period?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

I got pieced up for wearing bobos to the first day of high school.

[Adam Carolla]

What was. What are bobos?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

You know what bobos are? I grew up in a black neighborhood.

[Adam Carolla]

I had.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah, it's like just generic shoes with no Nike, Fila. Once I got Fela's, people stepped off.

[Nate Jackson]

Well, those were shoes where you didn't know what brand it was.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

It wasn't a brand.

[Nate Jackson]

Did you grow up on food stamps, too?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

I mean. No, No. I was in a military family, so the government paid us in a different way.

[Nate Jackson]

Got it. Yeah, got it. I didn't neither. Neither one of those.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah.

[Nate Jackson]

So I. I would just. I would. I've go to the other neighborhood and.

[Adam Carolla]

See what did you. What did you. What did you. How did you grow up?

[Nate Jackson]

I grew. Not on food stamps or military. I grew up with. In a house full of successful entrepreneurs.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Oh, great.

[Adam Carolla]

So is the black guy got the family. Entrepreneurs and white guys.

[Nate Jackson]

We saved a cat, too.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Cool.

[Adam Carolla]

Cool. What's your family do?

[Nate Jackson]

My dad owned a telecommunications company and my mom was an educational consultant.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, you told me this. I'm thinking back because I talked. I interviewed you years and years.

[Nate Jackson]

It was a long time ago.

[Adam Carolla]

I know, but we were talking about this in the south, somewhere in Seattle. What was this? Oh, shit. Church something. Or am I making that up? God damn it.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah, you making that up.

[Adam Carolla]

Sometimes I do a problem. I have a problem called the black simile where there's other black guy and I kind of get him mistaken for. And it's a thing, you know? Yeah, your dad's successful, Mom's successful, grew up in it. And did you go to college?

[Nate Jackson]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

And that's when the comedy started.

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah, I got dared while I was in college.

[Adam Carolla]

Who are all these enablers? I find it that, like, who dared me? Well, here's what I'm saying. I've interviewed 2,000 models.

[Nate Jackson]

Okay?

[Adam Carolla]

You know what every model tells you? They never go, I woke up on my 15th birthday and I looked in the mirror and I was like, man, you are hot.

[Nate Jackson]

Right?

[Adam Carolla]

You should get paid. Oh, no, it's always somebody signed me up for modeling competition. I didn't even know about it. You know what I mean? And then, or alternative, I went with a friend to an audition and they picked me. But either way, if you're a model, you cannot think you're hot. You had to sort of bum stumble your way into the business.

[Nate Jackson]

Those two wins.

[Adam Carolla]

The two wins are somebody sign me up for a competition or I went with my friend to an audition and they picked, but the casting director took me or the photographer took me. Stand up. The version of stand up is somebody signed me up for open mic, right? No, for me, everyone's like, shut up, you're not funny. When I sign you up for anything, do that on your own at the same time. They dared you.

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah, the model thing. I feel like if a woman is attractive enough that people would consider them a model. They hear about that often.

[Adam Carolla]

Also.

[Nate Jackson]

You should model. You should model just like a tall kid. You should play basketball. You should play basketball.

[Adam Carolla]

You also, you don't. If somebody said, adam, you know, when I was young, listen, we signed you up for a butt fucking competition, I'd be like, well, I'm not going. So how about that? What day is it? Not going? You don't have to go, right? If somebody signs you up for a modeling competition, you don't have to drive across town and show up at the mom. There's a hole in the story. Don't go if you don't. I was going to be a scientist. Good, don't go.

[Nate Jackson]

See, just thinking of you young. You and Amir be like, am I a butt fucker?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

I'm not going.

[Adam Carolla]

There was a fair amount of paperwork and a deposit. I wonder if he's going to get that deposit back. Maybe I should go. What does he see in me that I don't see myself? Perhaps I should have another one of these energy drinks my mom bought me on the SNAP program. Simply safe. Well, it's important to feel safe when you're at home. Traditional security systems only take action after someone has already broken in. That's too late. Simplisafe is setting the new standard in home security. Simplisafe's active guard protection can help prevent break ins before they happen. With AI powered cameras backed by live professional monitoring agents. Well, they'll monitor your property and they'll detect any suspicious activity. Monitoring starts affordably around a dollar a day. These guys are a great company, great business. Been with us for so many, so many years. We all use it here. Very ergonomically correct. Smooth. Looks good. No wires, no drilling batteries. Last up to 10 years. Two eyes in there. Simply safe. Right, Dawson?

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[Adam Carolla]

So you got dared.

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah, so I was in undergrad at Eastern Washington University and a friend of mine, John Fowler, I don't know how he started doing comedy. That's actually, I should find that out. But he was doing comedy as a, as a, you know, we were young, we were under 20, so he was doing it on Christmas breaks at like Giggles in Seattle and the Comedy Underground in Seattle and John Fox and. And then they would like let him perform. So I was just on campus talking shit every day. And one day I entered from the bottom side of the pub and I just went up to the middle level because it was the type of thing where it goes downstairs flat and then down. So I went up the first flight and then everybody's in the middle and we're all kicking it. And he just turned and was like, yo, if there was a comedy contest, would you do it? And I was like, where he's like, here. I'm like, against who? He was like, other students. I'm like, nobody here is funnier than me. I was at least cocky enough to say if we were shooting the dozens. You know, your mama jokes. I thought I had it. Nothing regarding structure. Real stand up. He's like, all right, bet there's a comedy contest. You're in it. I was like, what? He's like, look. And I turned and the stairs. I came up on the back. The back part of the banister. What the. If I had come down, I would have seen it, but I came under it, so I didn't see it. They said, student only comedy contest on Wednesday. And so they gave everybody a three by five card.

[Adam Carolla]

What day was it? Was it that day?

[Nate Jackson]

This was like a Friday.

[Adam Carolla]

So you had four days or something.

[Nate Jackson]

Four days. And. And we went to an open mic in Spokane at the Brick Wall Comedy Club. It was in the basement of a Quality Inn hotel. And they made us sit outside on the steps. And then two minutes before we hit the stage, we could go in. And then five minutes after, we could leave. And so we would sit on the steps and listen to the comics performing. That's where I, like, first heard, like, Jeff Dye, who's not. I mean, I think we're kind of the same age range, but he was doing comedy before me for sure. But that's where I saw, like, Jeff Dye and Von Eagle Bear and Harry J. Wright and all these, like, guys working it. And I was like, this is actually the thing we could do. And so we did the contest on the Wednesday, and I beat everybody but the guy that dared me.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, interesting.

[Nate Jackson]

He was like, hey, man, seriously, buddy, I've been doing comedy for, like, three, four years. I was like, when? How? You hadn't been to that comedy club any more than I had. And he's like, when I go home for Christmas break or any breaks, I go perform.

[Adam Carolla]

You wanna know how I got into modeling?

[Nate Jackson]

How'd you get into model?

[Adam Carolla]

The guy shined me up for the.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Butt competition sponsored by Nathan's.

[Adam Carolla]

They all. Evidently there were other competitions as well.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

I'm glad somebody of Nathan's.

[Adam Carolla]

All right now. So you knew you were funny, but you didn't. There's a part, whether it's being funny, being a model or being a fighter, where you go, well, I could do this thing pretty good, but I don't know if I could do it professionally. I just know I could do this thing playing an instrument.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Well, real quick, they put me in there with Boo Boo, this pro boxer who was just a beast of a man fighting on ESPN when I was 17, and he battered me pretty damn good, but I was still standing up and I was still moving. They're like, you're gonna be fine, Mayhem.

[Adam Carolla]

What? You were 17?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

But I wasn't Mayhem yet.

[Adam Carolla]

Boo Boo.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Wait, Boo Boo's real name was. Don't remember, but he told me, stay away from bitches, Mayhem. Jason. Jason. I was Jason back then. So I'm reimagining him. But, yeah, Leong Mayhem was sparring with pro boxers already, and they're like, oh, this guy's tough enough that, you know, he could take a beating. So he'll learn the rest. Yeah.

[Nate Jackson]

So they said, you can survive us.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah, exactly.

[Nate Jackson]

Just leave the bitches alone.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

He's gonna be fine. Yeah. And whatever sport he does.

[Adam Carolla]

So you think Boo Boo knows his real name?

[Nate Jackson]

At this point, maybe not too many punches.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

He just had baby mama drama, that guy. You know, big gold teeth in his face and man, smiley dude.

[Adam Carolla]

Light heavyweight.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

At the time.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Hey, how do you know that? You remember Boo Boo?

[Adam Carolla]

Then I fought at 176, which was light heavyweight in boxing, but it's not light heavyweight in UFC. That's 206. 205.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

I was curious why there's that chasm there between the boxing and there's no cruiser.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

They just renamed all the. You know, when UFC kind of helped usher in the unified rules, which gave the weight classes, they just kind of fell in line with the. The ufc.

[Adam Carolla]

Did you think Jon Jones is really retired or you think he's going for a payday?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

I think he's a big troll. I mean, but he relinquished the belt. This just happened, so it's a big story.

[Adam Carolla]

I know, but how much to get him to fight? What's his name?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Look, Dana said that he had the fight done. He said, you know, and the rumor was swirling. $30 million for this bout. Okay. That's what Jon initially asked for. They finally said, yeah, we got it for you. John said, nah, I'm retired. So maybe John's going give me some more money. If, you know, you see these boxing matches where they pull in so much money and the guys get paid 100 million bucks. Jake Paul's putting up numbers like that, even with Iron Mike Tyson. So it's like, okay, so the guys can't get paid the way that they want to. I think Jon Jones is ducking out to the shadow realm.

[Adam Carolla]

So is this. Is he coming back?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Right.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, who's he supposed to fight well, Tom Aspinall. Aspinall. So you give the belt to Aspinall, they do, Aspinall has it, then there's some shit talking, then he comes out of retirement, then up the pay per view and he gets a bigger taste of that.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Exactly. I mean, you're right.

[Nate Jackson]

If Jones doesn't fight Aspinall, who does?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

There are, there are some contenders. Curtis Blades is one of them.

[Adam Carolla]

A boo boo. Boo boo may still be in the match. Boo boo's got it. I always like when people do that stupid thing where they go, $30 million, I go out and get punched by Mike Tyson. Yeah, that's not how the business works. You fucking drink two beers and then walk out there and let him hit you out.

[Nate Jackson]

Sounds like Muhammad Ali and Frazier and Joe and George Foreman. Kind of like we might be on the precipice of a situation like that where okay, I gave the belt to this person and I expect to fight them and then, oh, a big bad wolf beat his ass and I got to figure it out.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

That's what happens. And look, Jon Jones against anyone else in the heavyweight division division is probably mops him up. Tom Aspinall is the only true contender that we're talking about because he has like sort of the whole game, you know, figured out.

[Nate Jackson]

Jon Jones is the baddest on earth. You tell me there's another person you would say in the same breath as Jon Bones Jones.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

There's a big question mark out there because the interim champion, Tom Aspinall just ran through everybody, you know, spent like two minutes in the ring, you know, like, he's like just a beast.

[Nate Jackson]

He's untested, he's just thorough.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

I would say that the heavyweight division has a chasm between the rest of the guys and then Tom and John. So that's why we all want to see the fight.

[Nate Jackson]

What about that guy Beast? That'd be like, I'm sweating like a.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Motherfucker, my balls is hot. Yeah, no, yeah, he's great too, but you know, he has a little bit. He's more of a striker.

[Adam Carolla]

He's lost a few and he has had.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah.

[Nate Jackson]

Has he?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Look, in the heavyweight division, I like.

[Adam Carolla]

Him too, but he's, he's lost a.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Couple of coin flip in there. When you're a heavyweight, you put that much power behind a punch. The human body can only take so much pain. That's why there's too 265 pound limit, you know, theoretically heavier than that. Really, really damage one another.

[Nate Jackson]

Right.

[Adam Carolla]

John is the is the goat. But wait, at 205 time, kind of 205. Okay. Time marches on, man. Undefeated, right?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

He hung back. He got a lot of outside of the ring drama. You know, it's like a hard life being a mixed martial arts fighter.

[Adam Carolla]

And, well, if they were to fight tomorrow, this weekend, who John would be favored? But by how much?

[Nate Jackson]

I know.

[Adam Carolla]

By how much?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Not much. I don't think today. Yeah, because everyone's hyped up. Yeah, I mean, everyone's hyped up, too, because we don't know exactly. The reason we want to see that fight is because we don't know how good Tom Aspinall really is. You don't get much footage of him because he finishes the job pretty quick.

[Nate Jackson]

Does Jon Bones have any motivation to do it?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Other than Jon Bones was just in Thailand having a blast, and my boys in Thailand know how fun it is. It's a very seductive place. Might have just got into that vacation mode and never wanted to come off.

[Nate Jackson]

Okay, interesting.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, another news. I saw a tweet, someone just a few minutes before the show started, just dudes on bicycles. And I'm wondering. I think it's a bigger. It's a bigger. More indicative of our situation problem as a society now with dudes on bicycle. First off, dudes on bicycles acted like they paved the road, okay. And you're just on it taking up space in your car because they think they're so much fucking better than you because they're on a bicycle.

[Pluto TV Ad]

Right.

[Nate Jackson]

Pedal bike.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Nate Jackson]

I think open this up to motorcycles as well.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, okay. All right. Well, so here's the thing. In my world where I grew up, if you're on a bike, you were just poor, okay? And if you're on a bike and you're riding it and you had another bike next year, that you're holding the handlebars, you were super poor, but you just stole that bike. So you might get some money now, but you were nothing. If you're on a bike now, bikes empowered, you know? So I think I blame the green movement because now you're saving the fucking world on your bike. But it's not enough just to be on your bike anymore. You got to be taking up a whole lane and fucking blocking everybody. And I told you, I was driving home from here once years ago, and there's bike lanes. They're taking up both lanes.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

And they're going nine miles an hour and taking up the whole fucking lanes. Stop it, please. So I just went around them, and they all Got pissed off, like, what the fuck? And it's like, I'm not attacking you. I'm going home, and I don't want to go home. Nine miles an hour. I'm just going around. So there's some sort of emotional, territorial. But it's also. There's a weird thing where people have lost their. It's sort of like when some guy gets high and he looks over the fence at the zoo and he sees the polar bears, and he goes, I'm gonna go pet that polar bear. It's like, that fucking thing will kill you. That thing will kill you. White people. Yeah, there's white people. So what white people do is we go, there's a crazy mom and a Suburban, and we're doing our fucking rally for ice. I'm gonna start pounding on your hood, and my friend's gonna go around the driver's side and start pounding. Bitch, you're gonna run over, okay? You're just gonna get run over because The Suburban is £6,000. You have a crazy woman. She's got an infant in the back. She's freaked out. She's got her foot on a pedal to the right, just needs to stab it once, and you're dead. And you're standing in front of her hood, pounding on her fucking hood. We do this with bikes. Like, you think you're gonna. Somebody's gonna run you over. You need to have a healthy fear of Suburbans and polar bears. They're not your friend.

[Nate Jackson]

That's the spectrum.

[Adam Carolla]

Now, listen, they're not killing you now, but that doesn't mean they can't kill you later, right? And they look kind of inert, like when you look at a polar bear. They go, look at him. Look at him over there swimming in a pool. He's got a keg trying to hold it underwater.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

He's drinking a Coke.

[Adam Carolla]

He will fuck your shit up. Yes, yes. All right, so anyway, now kids are going by and this thing where they're, like, blocking the street and then yelling anyone who tries to pass them. But this is all attitude, right? It's not. You can play. It's not transportation.

[Nate Jackson]

Well, I don't think they have a destination other than we're just going to get out there. And.

[Adam Carolla]

They just go down the middle of the street.

[Nate Jackson]

Cadillac is ready.

[Adam Carolla]

Here comes Cadillac guy, and Cadillac guy wants to fucking go around. So he goes around them Corolla, right? And then they all have to, like, try to cut him off.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Whatevs.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh. Oh, they got. Now they're gonna bust ya.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Snitch you're gonna get with the cops. Come on, man. You guys knew what you was doing. By the way, I would be. I would have done that as a kid.

[Adam Carolla]

No, no, I like, I like it. There's some guy on a fully off road motorcycle with no lights, no license plate, no turn signals. This is an off road use only motorcycle going. Get that guy's license plate.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Right.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm going to tell that I'm going to ride my Honda XR75 through the police precincts. Like, bitch, half of what all you guys are doing is illegal. Shut the up.

[Nate Jackson]

All right?

[Adam Carolla]

Turn the sound up. We'll hear it. So he goes around.

[Nate Jackson]

That'S a sexy ass truck. D4, D94. Hello, officer.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

These are the hoodlums right in the street.

[Nate Jackson]

Can you help us? Is this is it for cause? Are they like, let's go bike for cancer.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

We off of school.

[Adam Carolla]

I am telling you, I am telling you, they're indicators in life and people need to pay attention to the indicators. You know, like they'll, they'll say, you can read those articles, you know, 10 signs you're being cheated on. You know what I mean? Little stuff, you know, like they go, well, why do we have to go on vacation together all the time? Why don't you just go to Acapulco without me and I'll just hang back, right? Like there's stuff. There's stuff.

[Nate Jackson]

So what is this indicative of?

[Adam Carolla]

The beginning of the end. You're not letting me finish. It's hilarious right there. The beginning of the end for society.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Okay? Oh, we thought you were talking about something else.

[Adam Carolla]

No, it's got nothing to do with bikes.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

So many years ago, okay? X amount of years ago, I'm sitting in Malibu and I see down PCH in the middle of Malibu about 100 guys on mini bikes and dirt bikes and quads just all making a run for it right now. Any of us that had the mini bike or the dirt bike, whatever, it was a, it was always a big deal. So my friend Chris had some dirt bikes. You could not buy a dirt bike on food stamps. So we did not own a dirt bike. Although I would ride my cat around the neighborhood. But Chris had. And it was always a big thing to like, could we fire one up and take it for a lap around the block? You know, and if it, if there was any of that, and there was a little of that, it was like, side street, side street, side street. We'll do it on a weekend at night, you know, when no one's around. We don't want to get busted. You would never go down Ventura Boulevard on a fucking dirt bike back in the day. You'd be busted immediately. So a lot of it was just fear, right? Right. And so I'm seeing this whole group of 80 guys on mini bikes just going up and down PCs. Oh, zero fear. And rightfully so. They're not. Or street takeover, where they're just doing donuts.

[Nate Jackson]

Right?

[Adam Carolla]

We'd do a couple donuts and scram, you know, but not a street take. I was in San Francisco about five years ago. Saw the minibike brigade go down to the Fisherman's Wharf. Like I was. Like, I was in Chicago about eight, six, eight years ago and I was just sitting right down in the middle of town at a nice steakhouse. Here come the dirt bikes, here come the quads, here come the mini bikes. And I was like, oh, this means you've lost your town. It means the people in your town realize you're lawless and you get to fucking do what you want. It's, it's, it's indicative of a town whose kids don't give a fuck about the law. So per. It's perfect for Chicago, it's perfect for San Francisco, it's perfect for la. It's just an indicator that you're on the. You're circling the fucking drain. But there's going to be lots of other stuff that comes along with not respecting loss. With lots of junkies shooting up, stabbing, shootings it all. People shitting on the sidewalk. It's all, what are the mini bike guys? And they shit on the sidewalk guys have in common nothing except for the law. And they ain't worried about it. And that's what happens. So you show me a town with the bikes and the mini bikes and the dirt bike street takeovers, I'll show you a town that is on the decline and heading down. Now, you could go to Orange county and you wouldn't see that.

[Nate Jackson]

You see street races.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Kids are gonna not.

[Nate Jackson]

No, see, I think kids are gonna kill.

[Adam Carolla]

You're gonna see street now. You're not gonna see large groups of people getting on illegal bikes and going up and down the street in Irvine.

[Nate Jackson]

They're gonna get.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

I live in Orange county and I have seen some rich kids form a gang and then they have like, sweet.

[Adam Carolla]

I know, well, you're gonna get Hulk Hogan's kid. Had a souped up Supra and gotten an accident. It's like, all right, you guys are. I appreciate the shit on my point, these are rich guys doing a street race. That's not large swathes of people.

[Nate Jackson]

I like your point. The only thing I would offer is a little bit of grace for the kids being kids. Because we've all done that in some form. And I think the overall thing that they're thinking is they can't catch all of us.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah, I know.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

That's it.

[Nate Jackson]

You know what I'm saying?

[Adam Carolla]

No, that's what they're thinking. But I will tell you, the average age of the San Francisco mini biker was 47 and a half though. These ain't kids. These are adults on fucking minibu. I see dudes with full beards and shit on there. I know I got room for the 13 year olds. I'm talking about 40 something year olds. And I will put it to you this way. If somebody said, I'll tell you nothing about the town that you're gonna live in other than one has a lot of marauding minibike gangs and the other has zero, you're probably going with the zero. Mini bike. Like town.

[Nate Jackson]

I. Yeah, I agree.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

I like to live beyond Thunderdome.

[Adam Carolla]

That's where we're heading and that's where.

[Nate Jackson]

Water World and Mad Max is going on on the weekends in your town. It's a little low.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

It's already here.

[Nate Jackson]

What are they doing that? They don't have the energy to stop that now? That's where I'm like, okay, it's a good town. They just don't have time to worry about these.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

I know.

[Nate Jackson]

Dumbass kids.

[Adam Carolla]

No, I think that the new. The, the. So what happens? What I figured out is when a cop can shoot you, then one cop is good for 100 people because you got a gun. But if we know the cop can't, then they're fucked. The cops know they're gonna get surrounded by a fucking group of guys on mini bikes and they're gonna end up losing. Cause they can't shoot them. I would argue a warning shot would be fine, but they don't allow warning shots.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

I'm pretty sure the cops can shoot you. Like if that situation. If you're. Because you have a deadly weapon in between your legs.

[Adam Carolla]

Everybody has filming. Everyone's filming now.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah, that's true.

[Adam Carolla]

And your fucking career's over.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

That's true.

[Adam Carolla]

So they, the, the audience, the folks have caught on. That's why, put it to you this way, between, let's say 1950 and 10 minutes ago, how many people would put their hands on a cop?

[Nate Jackson]

How many people in here could vote then I think that more.

[Adam Carolla]

Hold on, Jesse Jackson over here. I'm saying nobody put their hands on cops.

[Nate Jackson]

That was white, black, Mexican, all four cops. Not shooting at everybody like, goddamn, get a bean bullet. Get a bean bag bullet. Get. Find another way. Tay is a motherfucker, but life taking is too much, especially for just kids riding down the street. You literally could be shooting a future something that matters to us.

[Adam Carolla]

You guys are picking the wrong angle. I'm not saying the cops should shoot him. I'm saying the cops, the kids. No one's getting shot. And you can go pushes. You can go now what you want.

[Nate Jackson]

We are saying the same thing. Because if the cops have. If. Let's say bullets scare 100 people. Being bullets that inflict pain. Scare way more than that because they're letting it fly. That's why it's active during protest. Like, that's why they're like. When the protest is, oh, we're gonna peacefully protest. And then at 6, that's supposed to stop. But then here come all the jackasses into the night. Right. Activate all bean bullets. And they're not missing anybody.

[Adam Carolla]

Do you think the term bean bullets a little racially insensitive with the ice people and.

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

The folks that we're talking about.

[Nate Jackson]

It's not a refried bean bullet. It's just a bean bullet. And I say like a bean bag, bean bag.

[Adam Carolla]

Gotta put the bag in there. The bean is. Becomes racially insensitive at a certain point.

[Nate Jackson]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

If you refill. Although a gun that just fired uncooked beans, I would definitely get that as well because that would fucking work.

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah. It'd be loud as fuck too.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Nightmare keep us away. All right, so we've lost control because we're not scared of cops, and now we. We're not scared of motorists either. Love y' all run, run. But you run a few over, it'll. It'll smooth its way out. Shit.

[Nate Jackson]

That's all you need, one story. So put it out. It doesn't have to be real. Do propaganda. Hey, the last bite.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Put it out there. Toyota Camry, like, chewed up some lady's leg.

[Adam Carolla]

They. Yeah, we've had a couple of run going on. Oh, really? Oh, yeah, yeah. We like to highlight them.

[Nate Jackson]

But how many. How many before you do feel like it could be you? Because the whole thing is, again, they're not going to get us all.

[Adam Carolla]

I think when somebody gets run out, like, okay, somebody goes in and what they do is they turn down the wrong street and they run into a protest.

[Nate Jackson]

Right.

[Adam Carolla]

And then the protest, by the way, needs. They need some sort of protocol when like mama gets lost, you got to step aside and go, yeah, we don't have a beef with you and the Camry. We got a beef with the ice agents or whatever it is. But they get all riled up and when the person in the Camry tries to get through them, they start banging on the Camry and then the person panics and goes. It's been a couple. There was like two in one weekend. I think once it gets pushed out there, it slows the role of others who think it's a good idea to stand in front of scared mom in the Camry. That's what I'm saying. Saying. But I don't have statistics on it.

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah, I don't either.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Well, most of the people.

[Adam Carolla]

You don't have those statistics.

[Nate Jackson]

I don't. I. Well, if I just. I. This is what I know as. As somebody was in a. In a fraternity that was in college. There will be parties and there's the fraternities and sororities would party walk, we call it, where they're dancing in a line or in the club. It is actually very inconvenient if you're trying to get from one side of the club to the other because everyone's normally just dancing. Well, now there's a structured line going through and if you line it for fighting.

[Adam Carolla]

Really?

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

What kind of dance?

[Nate Jackson]

Like, it's literally like. Like. Like a line dance, you know, I mean like it's a. You can count it out and it.

[Adam Carolla]

It's like an uninterrupted circle.

[Nate Jackson]

Yes. If. If there's enough members of it, then it's. And you're just in the middle like what the.

[Adam Carolla]

And you can't get out and everybody.

[Nate Jackson]

Out at some point. Some. You. You got to wait till the end of the song.

[Adam Carolla]

Uhuh. Oh, then you can, but you can't.

[Nate Jackson]

To a song like DJs know, like. All right, if I play nothing are going to go craz. No, if you play Atomic Dog in the club, the cues are gonna go nuts. We get it.

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So.

[Adam Carolla]

And you get so I'm trapped in the circle and I gotta piss back.

[Nate Jackson]

You're only as trapped as your. Your ignorance to what's going on.

[Adam Carolla]

That's heavy, man.

[Nate Jackson]

If you wait a few more minutes.

[Adam Carolla]

But I got plenty room to get out. I'm saying, I gotta piss real bad.

[Nate Jackson]

What's better, peeing or get knocked out and peeing on yourself?

[Adam Carolla]

Is there some Kind of red slash black rover where I can just go cross. You know what I mean?

[Nate Jackson]

Where I can crosswalk through the party.

[Adam Carolla]

Walk is a crosswalk around me.

[Nate Jackson]

The. No, the cr. You. If. If you're in the middle of this, if you're in a circle and the bathroom's outside the circle, you got to figure out how to get out.

[Adam Carolla]

That's what I'm saying. It's. It's around me.

[Nate Jackson]

You got to. Wait. What? So how long is the song? 3 minutes and 30 seconds. Maybe a minute and a half.

[Adam Carolla]

I drank these Red Bulls. My mom.

[Nate Jackson]

What are you doing in the middle of the club having to pee that bad?

[Adam Carolla]

But it is a rap. You cannot.

[Nate Jackson]

You had a tickle on your way to the middle.

[Adam Carolla]

I may have been dancing my ass off drinking Red Bulls that my mom got me first period. And now I gotta go bad.

[Nate Jackson]

Right.

[Adam Carolla]

And you guys have formed a circle. Yes, a complete circle. Unbroken.

[Nate Jackson]

Unbroken. Like a chain, a link to brotherhood and sisterhood.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Like 300.

[Adam Carolla]

And it is akin to, like taking the American flag and dropping it on the ground or something. To break the chain, the circle.

[Nate Jackson]

No, but you're breaking the ties of brotherhood and sisterhood that they have to each other and. And symbolism for what they went through and them having fun as a unit off of your little bladder.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, it's a medium sized bladder. It's been in there for a while.

[Nate Jackson]

I've been the one dancing. And if somebody was like, I have to be.

[Adam Carolla]

I'd be like, you would let them buy. All right, well, that's why I gotta find. I gotta find someone forgiven. I gotta be.

[Nate Jackson]

I gotta be.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

I'm reporting you to the Q Dog Council. There you go.

[Adam Carolla]

Go. Okay.

[Nate Jackson]

It's only for one song. Also, we usually don't even go the whole song.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, really?

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah, there's a lot. It's a lot of everybody else. Party walks, we hop. So there's a lot of jumping and it's, you know, it's for kids jumping around. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, I gotta write this down. This makes everybody else comes up. Okay, but you guys, are you connected? Are you holding hands? Hips.

[Nate Jackson]

No, but you're close enough.

[Adam Carolla]

You're close enough.

[Nate Jackson]

Like if I. If. If Mayhem and I were right there and he took three steps forward and I did two. You're not going to get me to.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

I was imagining an over. Under situation. You know what I mean? Like one clinch.

[Nate Jackson]

I've seen a lot of stuff. I've seen somebody, you know, do the first half of a jumping jack and somebody slid under and pop up like it's a. It's a part choreograph, you know what I mean?

[Adam Carolla]

And the DJ knows, and so do the partygoers.

[Nate Jackson]

You hear Atomic Dog, come on. You're like, baby, they just start getting out the way. Like, here come them cubes.

[Adam Carolla]

What if I got. What if I got my Cadillac Escalade and I started to go around the whole group? Would you guys get pissed? Would you report me?

[Nate Jackson]

We'd be like, D 473656.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, you sunk my battleship. All right, let's take a break. You got some news there, Mayhem? All right, Nate, hang out. We'll do some news right after this. O'Reilly Auto Parts. Yeah, funny. I was just driving home from Vegas the other day, pulled off in, like, Barstow, get some coffee, saw O'Reilly's. Oh, man, this close to going in. Love these guys. They're all over the place. They keep your car on the road. O'Reilly Auto Parts offers friendly, helpful service and the parts knowledge you need for all your maintenance and repairs. Always use these guys. Always been a neighborhood guy who always went to my neighborhood, O'Reilly, when I lived in the valet. One to one. I lived up in La Canada. One to one. So whether you're a car aficionado or an auto novice, you'll find the employees at O'Reilly Auto Parts are knowledgeable, helpful, and best of all, they are friendly. Stop by O'Reilly Auto Parts today or you can visit us online@o'reillyauto.com Adam that's o'reillyauto.com Adam. Adam.

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[Nate Jackson]

P. Diddy, AKA Sean Combs, AKA Puff Daddy, AKA the Diddler. The feds that raided his house. And they found a whole bunch, okay? They found some guns, some illegal, with the serial number scrubbed off. And. And they found some that was so wild that when people read that, they stopped caring about the AR15s with the serial number struck like, that's enough. You read down one more line, you're like, wait, what? This gotta be a typo. Let me check another source. Oh, wow. It says it on both of these news outlets. That's amazing. What 1000 bottles of baby oil were found during the FBI raid.

[Dawson]

Nate Jackson is on the Adam Carolla Show.

[Adam Carolla]

Nate's got shows all over the place. And the Special coming up July 8th on Netflix. Congratulations to that.

[Nate Jackson]

Thank you.

[Adam Carolla]

Go to the website, go to natejacksoncomedy.com, find out the live dates and then also what's special and everything else. Right?

[Nate Jackson]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

I was just looking down my list of notes here because I'm curious where you guys are at. It's been some controversy. I just left a hotel. The tip. The hotel tip for the maid. The maid tip. Now, we're living in some weird world now where I go to the Starbucks at The hotel is 21 bucks for two coffees. And then there's the 15%. 20 or 25. And I'm like, all right, 15%. But you're getting a tip. There's tipping everywhere. There's tipping, but the hotel made.

[Nate Jackson]

That's a thing.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, yeah. So this is the question. Well, first off, in the annals of tipping, it's weird. The guy at the Home Depot that helps you doesn't get a tip. You know, he may be up on a ladder. You're asking someone to climb a ladder for you, zero tip. But you go to the Starbucks and the chick just gives you a coffee. You gotta tip her. The bartender, you know, it's like a weird. No tips on, you know, flight attendants never get a tip.

[Nate Jackson]

Sometimes I'll tell you. No, no, no tip. No tip.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, it's weird. We have a weird society where I could make. I could make a. Much like there are times I've been to the Home Depot. I sat down and ordered doors and windows for entire fucking house. I mean, I sat down with the guy for an hour. He went through every measurement, lined it up, showed me all the options, printed out the thing. Okay, no tip for him, but tip for Starbucks. Guy hands you the bagel. You know what I mean? Okay, so we're kind of weird with tipping, but hotel made. Now. Now, some people tip, some people don't. Now, in my world, if you're staying in a hotel for three, four, five days and there's a person coming in, cleaning the toilet, putting the towels out, making the bed and stuff, that person has done enough to get a tip before I walk out the door for the last time. Okay, but also, people don't know also. But there have been situations where I just check in and I always just put, do not disturb if I'm alone. Do not disturb. I'll deal with my own towels. I'll deal with my own bed. You don't have to make my bed. I'll make my bed. I got everything where. I know where the TV remote is. You don't have to put it in a condom and put it in the nightstand. Like I know where my shit is. And by the way, my shit's all over the place. I don't even want you in here. Right? That case, I will leave and possibly do no tip. But if I'm asking for extra towels and coffee pods and make the room up and shit like that, right. I think that person needs a tip. But I'm curious how you guys roll.

[Nate Jackson]

What's the percent for that, though? 10% of your.

[Adam Carolla]

No, no, I think on that one you just leave 20 bucks or something.

[Nate Jackson]

20 bucks?

[Adam Carolla]

Well, what? Look at it.

[Nate Jackson]

20. How many cups of coffee and did they bring you?

[Adam Carolla]

Well, hold on, mister. Selling out the return twice over here. But listen, that's a thankless job.

[Nate Jackson]

That happens when I'm out of the room. Anyway, when I come back, it's already made up.

[Adam Carolla]

20 bucks. Let's amortize it. You might be there for three, four, five days. That's 273. 75 a day for coming in, cleaning the 20 bucks a day. Hold on. No, you leave. Okay, Leave a. I got you.

[Nate Jackson]

You leave a dub for the week.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. When you leave at the end of the thing. Here's 20 bucks.

[Nate Jackson]

All right.

[Adam Carolla]

No percentage. No percentage.

[Nate Jackson]

I like personally. This is my thing. If I give you a 10 tip, I'd like to see you be gracious.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, you.

[Nate Jackson]

What I gave. Just to thank you a head nod or something like that. Yo, what's up?

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, you want.

[Nate Jackson]

Have you ever left a fat ass tip somewhere? Have you ever left a big ass tip and then like they just picked it like it was regular tip?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah. I don't.

[Nate Jackson]

Give me. Give us. Give us the 300 back.

[Adam Carolla]

I will. I will say this.

[Nate Jackson]

What?

[Adam Carolla]

I agree. I. I'll tell you what I'm guilty of. Sometimes you slap the tip down on the bar counter and the person's walking the other direction and it's like, oh, I'm gonna wait till they come back and I'll slide. I want them to know this one came from me.

[Nate Jackson]

Yes.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah, I do like the dunk at Starbucks. Like, so everyone knows I tip the barista.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, so room tip, hotel. Not necessarily. But if you really think about it, these people are a lot poor than the average bartender is and do fucking a hell of a lot more work than open you a beer. So they deserve it. That much we got, you don't need it. I Feel like protocol is if you walk in and do the do not disturb, yes, maybe not. But still, always good. A little something something, because they're going to clean the room. But if you're asking for towels and you're asking for shit, leave them 20 bucks.

[Nate Jackson]

It's not like I'm not. I'm not. I'm not paying for the room already, and it's not already higher than it would have been if I stayed there.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, but you already paid 20 bucks at a Starbucks for fucking nothing.

[Nate Jackson]

True, but I also tip the shuttle driver. I tip the person that put the bags on the thing. Like, I'm already in this whole tipping.

[Adam Carolla]

I agree, but this person deserves the tip. Maybe more than, like I said, the shuttle driver, the bartender.

[Nate Jackson]

I. I would say I'm tipping the person that flipped my room saying, thank you for not stealing.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

If I shave my balls in there, I tip them 20 bucks.

[Adam Carolla]

Smart.

[Nate Jackson]

Okay? If they shave my balls in there, I'm tipping 20 bucks.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Well, I try to seduce them anytime they come around.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, a lot of those dudes don't.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Then you don't got to tip them at all.

[Nate Jackson]

Right?

[Adam Carolla]

Let me ask you guys. This chiropractor, okay, I think about the chiropractor sometimes, and I realize I don't think I've ever really benefited from the chiropractor. I've benefited from, like, a good Thai massage and. Or good sauna, hot tub, a good dry or wet heat, and then a good Thai massage. But a lot of people are like, oh, you're the chiropractor. But I don't know. I feel like I've been to the chiropractor a few times and come back as sore as I was when I got there, or worse. And they're not real doctors or anything, but here's where I'm getting at, I think. And like I said, a good. Like, here's whatever you got. You're going to a chiropractor, get a Thai massage, a blow job, and a scotch. I think you'll feel a fuck of a lot better. You'll feel a lot better than this guy. But all right, fine. I don't really know what they do. I'm not a big fan. I think it's the cracking because you go there and you lay down and they know how to do it. They go, yep. And you hear that crack, crack, crack. And you go, oh, yeah, that's. Something happened. Oh, yeah, they crack you. They crack you. But I realized I can crack my knuckles. My hands don't Feel any different or better? Chiropracting without the crack. I don't think they got business.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

It's like toothpaste.

[Adam Carolla]

They're out of fucking business now. And then I thought the cracking to the chiropractor is the zap sound of the bug zapper. It's like, oh, something's happening.

[Nate Jackson]

We got something.

[Adam Carolla]

And that's when I realized I could deal. I know people in China, okay? I could develop a bug Zapper for, like, $3, a unit that I could sell for $49 on Amazon. It wouldn't kill bugs. It was just a sound machine that made the zapping sound. And it had a blue light. It would cost $3. Cause we wouldn't have to kill any bugs. And you'd hang it up on your porch. You'd hear. And you just sit there being eaten alive by mosquitoes, going, yeah. Oh, I made the right choice.

[Nate Jackson]

You know how many would bite us if we didn't have that thing?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah. And I'd have to. I do. Every fifth one would be a long one, right? I go, oh, that's a. That was a crane fly, man. That was a big one. That was a big one. It'd be intermittent, you know what I mean? So I'd be baited into this thing, right? A bug zapper without the zapping sound. Out of business the next week. Chiropractor without the cracking. No more. No more for you.

[Nate Jackson]

So do we have a product for the chiropractors to stay in business? Are we selling, like, balsa wood planks so they can just, like, set.

[Adam Carolla]

I think there's. There's an app where it just makes the cracking. He's just like, let me set my phone down. Right? He just. And it just goes, right? And then you would go, oh, yeah.

[Nate Jackson]

So it's soft oriental music with full volume cracks in it.

[Adam Carolla]

Mm. Full volume cracks. Every once in a while, he'd fuck up and do the bug zapping app, and you'd freak out, like, what? Oh, sorry, hold on. Let me fix it.

[Nate Jackson]

He'd be like, did you enjoy the massage? And cracking sounds are still going off.

[Adam Carolla]

I think it's the crack that gets them, because other than that, they're just pushing on. You'd rather have a massage?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Well, you know, the toothpaste was not even used until they added that mint taste to it.

[Adam Carolla]

Really?

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

There's no need for that mint taste. It's just to let you know that. Oh, so I cleaned my tingle. Yeah, that tingle. Yep, exactly. That's how they market it.

[Adam Carolla]

Have you guys ever benefited from a chiropractor?

[Nate Jackson]

Never really been good.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah, I have.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

I don't know. But like you said.

[Adam Carolla]

But what about a good Thai massage instead?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

I know, I gotta go. I've been on the plane a lot. Yeah. Yeah. That's the way.

[Nate Jackson]

The end of it. I've been like, yeah, the ending. Lighter. I can focus now.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yep.

[Adam Carolla]

You guys ever been to a massage place and had them kind of feel you out? Like, were you up for this? Is this what we're doing?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah, but he was wearing socks on his hands.

[Adam Carolla]

He.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

No, on his feet.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, okay.

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah, I went to a massage and I guess as I didn't know. I guess the protocol is to leave some money me like a pre tip. I guess so they know like, oh.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Oh, you know what time it is.

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah, but I didn't know. I was like, I don't know how this place gets down. I don't know. You know? Plus, I hadn't decided I want to do all that. She really gets my back. Good. You know what? Let's take this to another level. Also, what she looked like. You know what I mean? Anyway, and so, yeah, she's. She's trying to see what I was on by like. Like the thigh rub went up like crazy high. Like, like an incidental ball.

[Adam Carolla]

Brush, brush, Grays. Zach. Grace. Yeah, yeah.

[Nate Jackson]

And I'm like, huh? What we doing?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

You did downwards.

[Nate Jackson]

No, no, that was my dick.

[Adam Carolla]

My dick was like, Is this real addicted?

[Nate Jackson]

No, no, my dick. No, my dick wants a couple bra brushes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. By the time they, like, turn over, I'm like, let's turn over then.

[Adam Carolla]

Huh?

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Happy ending.

[Nate Jackson]

I appreciate one.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, but.

[Nate Jackson]

But have you ever been on Full Salute? And she's like. And that's the massage. She's like, what did I even pay?

[Adam Carolla]

So she finished you off?

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah, that's. That's a. That's a great day.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm not. I'm not questioning the day. I'm just saying she. She. I just want to. I'm looking for accuracy here. Finish. Yes.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Google reviews.

[Adam Carolla]

I.

[Nate Jackson]

But if you get a regular massage after ever having a happy ending, you're laying there thinking the whole time, you ruined. Yeah, you're ruined because you're like, I wonder if she's gonna. Is she a goer? She gonna do it?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah, I feel that way. Feel that way. People, when they're told they don't. Like when they order fries or something and they go, oh, we don't have ranch sauce. People go, like, oh, it just kills the ending, right?

[Nate Jackson]

Or somebody that hits a jackpot in a casino too soon, you get ruined.

[Adam Carolla]

Because you get the happy ending massage and then the regular massage, right?

[Nate Jackson]

It's the comic that goes on stage for their first time and kills. You're like, oh, you are fucked. Where?

[Adam Carolla]

I think the most unlikely happy ending massage is the, like, massage place at the airport that's a full glass facade. I can't imagine going, where's your flight?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

No, no, you gotta finish yourself off.

[Adam Carolla]

You finish yourself. That's right. When they go, yeah, I went to a. I went to a Hole in the wall place in Houston.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Don't ask for permission.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, no.

[Nate Jackson]

Hilarious.

[Adam Carolla]

No, you asked for forgiveness.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Precisely.

[Adam Carolla]

From the D gates Southwest crowd queuing up, there's mayhem getting a finish. I am telling you, if you got a happy ending at an airport massage, you would be my. I would bow and go, you know what? You're the greatest of all.

[Nate Jackson]

I think they should implement it for customer service. You ever, like, do you ever miss the flight, like, and you see the door close while you're running to it? You're like, what the fuck? They're like, your next flight is in three hours. Here's a complimentary cross from the D gates.

[Adam Carolla]

That's right, a tuck. Morgan and Morgan. Here's a dirty little secret the insurance industry may want to keep under wraps. Insurance companies profit by holding on to your money for as long as possible. So after an accident, they might do whatever they can to delay or deny your claim. This is why they keep. Keep the profits growing. And that's how they do it. And that's where Morgan and Morgan comes in. They fight hard against these corporations to fight back to make sure you get every penny you deserve. I like these Morgan and Morgan guys. I've talked to them. They have a sense of humor, which I kind of like in a company. So when Morgan and Morgan takes on a case, they're almost always going after the big insurance companies and not the individuals at fault. There's a reason. Reason why Morgan and Morgan is America's largest injury firm. Am I right, Dawson?

[Dawson]

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[Adam Carolla]

I went to a place like a mall in Houston across from the hotel I was staying. It was like a strip mall. And it was like during COVID And I just came walking in and the Asian middle aged woman in the place didn't recognize me at all. And she was like, what do you want? I was like, just a massage. She's okay. And I noticed that as she was giving me a sense she would like hit my dick, you know, but it seemed like more like. Like a fly landed on it. She's like chewing it away. But I was like, she just getting a little spastic here. It's just a ball graze. Like I.

[Nate Jackson]

She's trying to see what you're on.

[Adam Carolla]

What are we doing? Like, I didn't know what. What. What we were doing.

[Nate Jackson]

Right.

[Adam Carolla]

And I think that's what it is. I think in. In lieu of any other information, they just kind of give you a swat or graze. That's what you got, Ryan.

[Nate Jackson]

Expect your head to pop up like so. Or at least a thumbs up.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, I didn't get one. I just sort of. I think she got. I think she figured out I was just there for a massage.

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah, she thought you were a cop. He doesn't like tipping as a sting.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Nate Jackson]

All right.

[Adam Carolla]

What do you got? In the news.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

In the news, guest friend of the show, Margaret Cho disses mean girl Ellen Deja DeGeneres in a scathing podcast interview.

[Adam Carolla]

Wait, mean girl or meme girl?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Mean.

[Adam Carolla]

Mean.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

She called her a mean girl. Quote.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, Ellen is mean, but that's.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

We all know that. Yeah. She calls her so creepy and weird. Here's a clip. Or there we go.

[Adam Carolla]

What was she on?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah, it was this podcast. The Kelly Mantle.

[Adam Carolla]

Kelly Mantles podcast was like really weird.

[G]

And not nice to me for most of my career and like. Cause I opened for her in the 1980s when she was a headliner in comedy clubs and not way, way before her big fame. And so then when I would do. Later when I would do her talk show in the 2000s, she acted like we just met. And I'm like one of those types of.

[Adam Carolla]

One of those times. I'm like, what?

[G]

Like, that's weird. Like we go way back.

[Adam Carolla]

What?

[G]

Like, it's so creepy and weird, but you know Also, the other thing was, David Bowie had been on the show, and he was so excited that the night before that, I had come to his show wearing this giant Chinese emperor outfit. He was really thrilled about it, and he talked at length about it. And she cut it out of the show, which made me so mad. And the producer, who's a really good friend of mine, had to call me and tell me, I can't believe she did this, but she cut it out of the show. But you need to know that he was going on and on about your outfit. He loves you. God. Said your name.

[Adam Carolla]

That's so cute. Which is so rude.

[Nate Jackson]

That is so crowd.

[G]

I don't know if it was personal. Maybe it was for time, but still, I'm gonna take it personally just because I decided to.

[Adam Carolla]

You should have sent her a note and said, send me the footage. I'll post it to my YouTube.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Wow, Karl Mantle's pretty hot.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, okay. Eh. That's so rude. So excited. God, it's gotta be such a fucking chore pretending to be a chick your whole life, even for a lot of women. I know, but Ellen is. Ellen is mean. Ellen is mean. She's not nice. You saw a recent picture of her.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

She looks like. Oh, man, she looks.

[Adam Carolla]

Listen, everyone eventually turns into what they're thinking. Look, I have been talking about Ellen being a bitch for 20 years, but I don't mind it. You're a comedian, first off. What are you, some kind of fucking ambassador? Chuck E. Cheese? Who the fuck cares? I don't care if you're mean. I care that you pay your taxes, create jobs, employ people, do what have you. Fine, mow your lawn. I don't really care how fucking nice you are. I've talked to too many people that are nice, that are fucking horrible in every other department. So fuck you. I'd rather just have shit attitude and created jobs. Paid taxes and contributed number one. All right, look, I showed up to her. I did Ellen 20 years ago. Her entire staff was scared shitless of her. And I was like, okay, so she's mean because everyone here is scared. And that's how you can look every. Every production. And I would say, like, most jobs take on a personality, and sometimes it's the person at the top, but it's like a personality. Like, sometimes you go into a place and you go, fucking everyone around here is a dick. You know? And then the fucking guy who owns the transmission shop's the biggest asshole. You know? I went to a Mac store in Salt Lake City. Everyone. Everyone's Fucking Apple Store or whatever. Everyone's fucking friendly as shit. Like, they were told be fucking friendly, and they were friendly. Apple dictated, fucking be nice or we'll fucking fire you. And I like walked in there and I was like, I'm like, you looking to buy something? I was like, nah, I just want to get out of the heat. I have a. Could your phone use to charge? I go, yeah, my phone could. Well, let me set you up with that. And I was like, everyone around here is friendly now. They're being told to be friendly, but that's the eating, you know what I mean? Every production, especially a daytime or a late night show, takes on the personality of the person that's hosting the show, okay? So when you would go and do Leno, it was chillax. He was chillax. And you could hear the way people talk to him. So we'd be up on stage and he'd be running the monologue or something or the bit we're doing. And his writer would be like, on stage or in the audience, and they'd say just stuff like, jay, you're not doing it right. That's not as funny as the way we planned. Just do it my way. And you can't talk that way to fucking certain people at all, especially comedians. And he'd go. And Jay would be like, you want me to do it the other way? And they go, yeah, do it the other way. And they go, okay, sorry, I'll try that anyway. And so you go, okay. That guy's a repertoire. And people. And people just coming down the hallway talking. No one's looking over the shoulder. Easy. Kimmel's place that way. Letterman. Everyone's scared shitless. Really scared shitless. Don't talk to Dave. First off rules. They go, okay, do not touch Dave. You go out there, do not fucking touch Dave. You understand? I don't care if you're fucking around. Don't touch Dave. Don't do the. Lots of. Don't, don't.

[Nate Jackson]

No, no, wait on high five. You let him wait.

[Adam Carolla]

You let him fucking leave him hanging up there. Doing the Heil Hitler. Yeah. Joe Letterman's crew is scared because Letterman is mean and it means he's yelled at a lot of fucking people. Also. It's a finish the show. He goes up to his office. Everyone's scared shit. Lets to go up there. I say hi to Dave after. I don't think you should go up there. You know, there's a lot of that now. You don't say that. Leno. Yeah, go, go see Leno. Right, Right. Or go see Kimmel. Okay. I walked into Ellen. Everyone's scared shit less.

[Nate Jackson]

What about Fallon?

[Adam Carolla]

Never done Fallon here. He's nice. Couldn't imagine you'd get the scared shit list.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Crush. Yeah, I. I have. And, yeah, everybody was friendly. And the boots. Yeah, we're cool.

[Nate Jackson]

Sherry shepherd show was awesome. Yeah, the Jefferson were all singing in the hallway. Looks like it's very inviting.

[Adam Carolla]

Be careful. Ellen danced, right. Why was she dancing over compensation? Who are the two dancers? Ellen and Bill Cosby and Diddy. And Diddy.

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Those are the three dancers. And look where they are.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Oh, and they all got shiny.

[Adam Carolla]

Not that Diddy's as bad as Ellen, don't get me wrong.

[Nate Jackson]

Or Ellen's as bad as Diddy.

[Adam Carolla]

I was making a joke.

[Nate Jackson]

That's good. Either way, I love it.

[Adam Carolla]

I twisted that one.

[Nate Jackson]

All right?

[Adam Carolla]

But, yeah, Ellen is mean. Fine, she scares the people she works with. Fine. But that's who she is. And all the people will tell you by the look on their face because they told me, don't talk about this. Don't talk about that. And the guy was clearly scared. I'm sitting in the green room going, yeah, yeah, go up there and tell. Don't talk about. He circled back, he goes, seriously, don't. Meaning somebody talked about that.

[Nate Jackson]

She still did it.

[Adam Carolla]

She is. She is vegetarian or vegan.

[Nate Jackson]

Okay?

[Adam Carolla]

Somebody went in there and talked about having a big fucking barbecue on the fourth of July. And then she went back to her segment producer and fucking screamed at it. Right? Because she's a bitch and she's vegetarian, and she didn't want to hear about it or promote it or have to smile through it. So she went back and yelled at that person. Later on, a year later, I come on the show and the guy goes, no, not talk about making flank steak. And I'm like, I'm not talking about that. Yeah, but don't. You know what I mean? And I'm going. All I did is. I go scared. I mean, it's like, look, a wife. A wife who's being beaten, right? You know, she'll go, look, you go hang out, have another. No, no. I should really get home. You know, it's like, okay, you're scared, right? You're scared. That's. That's how employees act. You know what I mean?

[Nate Jackson]

I wonder what that's from. Cause I mean, like, I own a comedy club, and I have staff, and I don't want them to be, like, scared, you know, I think I'm. I think I'm pretty fun and cool to be around, so people always want to come around us. But.

[Adam Carolla]

But let me warn you, my people.

[Nate Jackson]

Should know, like, the things to be like, don't this. Or give them room.

[Adam Carolla]

You know, a personal warning. A word for the wise. Yeah, a little scared is good. A little bit. Because around here I'll go, could someone move their car? Won't you move your car, fat ass? Like, I'm like, all right, all right. A little scared. A little disgusting. Just a little bit.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

I gotta be just shy of a tyrant.

[Nate Jackson]

Same. You need a crazy mother around you. So they're like, Adam said, move your car.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Nate Jackson]

You could just be the back. Like, please move it.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

You don't know how many times I double edged, Dawson.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. I am telling you, you can always tell. It's weird when I dealt with Katie Seagals from Married With Children and Sons of Animals. Turama, baby, I was building shit at her house when I was a civilian.

[Nate Jackson]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

I got on the building celebrity building circuit.

[Nate Jackson]

Wow.

[Adam Carolla]

I know. And. And you can always kind of tell because I pulled my truck up into her g. Into her driveway.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Okay.

[Adam Carolla]

And in the Hollywood Hills, and I had a load of cabinets and I built and drywall or whatever, and I had to back my truck up and start unloading into her garage. And her assistant just came, like, running out, like, you got to move your truck. You got to move your truck. And I'm like, like, I'm just unloading, right? You know, we're in the Hollywood Hills. Like, I don't know where to park. I want to park 100 yards away and unload the entertainment unit.

[Nate Jackson]

Right?

[Adam Carolla]

I'm just. When I'm done alone, they're like, okay, but you gotta move it. And I realized, what are you so panicked for? And they're like, oh, that person got yelled at because she came home. The pool man or whomever was blocking and she got yelled at. Yes. And that's why the panic. Yeah, that's how life works.

[Dawson]

Good.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, what else you got, man?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

All right, next up, the LA County Sheriff's Department apologized for an Iran bombing post. Yeah, they apologized for social media posts that referred to the people of Iran as victims of the US Bombing raid that targeted Iran's nuclear program.

[Adam Carolla]

What's with the LA County Sheriff? First off, can I say this? Does everybody need to weigh in on every fucking subject? You know what I mean? You don't fly B2 bombers. You're not on the ground. You don't design bunker busters. Just. You fucking arrest people in Protest and pull over fucking moms for speeding in school zones. Stay in your fucking lane, L.A. county sheriffs.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah. You don't even know what a massive ordinance penetrator is.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, sounds hot, though.

[Nate Jackson]

I think this is about the second paragraph.

[Adam Carolla]

What's the second paragraph say?

[Nate Jackson]

At the moment, there are no known threats to Los Angeles County. However, out of an abundance of caution, we're increasing patrol, checking and at places of worship and other sensitive locations throughout the county.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

We're coming to your mosque, baby, wash.

[Nate Jackson]

Your feet to protect you, keep you. I think we need to issue something so that our citizens don't feel like, feel afraid of the retaliation that first of all, be afraid. Ain't nobody at this, hey, man, it's a war has started and there's a certain amount of afraid that makes sense. And I don't know if LA county sheriffs are the ones to be like, hey man, everybody come down.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, I will turn a hose on it.

[Nate Jackson]

Because if some shit pops off, you could be like.

[Adam Carolla]

But the sheriff said, what are they going to do? They're going to look at places of worship. What does that mean? They're going to the mosque.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

The mosque? Yeah. That's what they're warning everybody, Kind of. Yeah.

[Nate Jackson]

We're going to increase patrol checks at places of worship and other sensitive locations throughout the. That is. What do you. What do you mean?

[Adam Carolla]

I don't buy. By the way, I don't like any job. I don't like any job where they go. Now we're really going to start doing our job to save you like that. But you just do your job all the time to the best of your ability and, you know, like, you work in airport security. It's like, oh, man, now we really got to focus. It's like, how much is focused on any given Tuesday at all times? How about. How about that? I didn't know.

[Nate Jackson]

Let's say they are right. Let's say there's a. There's, you know, there's a low part of being vigilant and then this, no matter where it's at, this is going to be an increase. So they've already had a presence.

[Adam Carolla]

Do you guys have any fear about what's currently going on?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

If it was against, like somebody with, I don't know, more organized military.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah, I know. I don't have any thoughts about it.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

It's like, if, you know the military capabilities of Iran versus us and like how much distance is between us, the factor is low. Like maybe some type of radical extremist comes With.

[Nate Jackson]

That's the part.

[Adam Carolla]

Weapons. That's what they're saying.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Ied. That's my bad.

[Nate Jackson]

Because I'm like, no, I'm not worried about all that over there. No. I'm worried about if they have the. Well, they call them sleeper cells.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

That's what I mean.

[Nate Jackson]

But somebody that's like, all motivated again, to be like the East.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

They can read all everyone's text messages. It's kind of past that point now.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, there is a part that's a little tough, though. The part that's the wild card in this is basically four years of a wide open border. So whoever there may be people here, China backed Iran, whatever, in the last four years, maybe have slipped across, even though Joe and Kamala were very dutiful in patrolling that border, some may have gotten across and that. That's something to think about. I don't know. I guess my feeling would be if someone said, you want to come out to Times Square this weekend and help us celebrate the whatever, I'd kind of go, eh, let's get off the beaten path a little bit. But that's about as far as I'd. So I think that's about as far as I'd take it.

[Nate Jackson]

I want people to feel comfortable coming out to things in big groups.

[Adam Carolla]

I do too.

[Nate Jackson]

Selling tickets to them.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm just saying.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah, yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm just saying. Times Square, I don't know. I still, you know, overseas being like.

[Nate Jackson]

We must get the D N Jackson show. Like, I don't see that.

[Adam Carolla]

No, I'm just saying, I was, you know, this shit was going down a week ago. I was in Salt Lake City. I was like, okay, nothing's going on. We're not on. We didn't make anyone. Everyone's top 10 of cities to blow up. There's nothing going on here. You know what I mean?

[Nate Jackson]

So Times Square, you'd be a little more vigilant.

[Adam Carolla]

And if you had a show in Times Square and invited me tonight, I would go, okay. But if you want to know where my fear factor is, it's at zero, pretty much. With the caveat that if someone said, we're going to go to Times Square, I'd probably say, why don't we have our celebration in Newark? Okay, that's all. That's all. Okay. But I would not prevent me from going.

[Nate Jackson]

But a zero.

[Adam Carolla]

Pretty, pretty close. Pretty close to zero. With thoughts. I mean, I flew right after 911 and stuff like that. Like, I don't have. I went to New York right after 911 for Hugh Hefner roast. I think that was a couple days. It was 10 days or something. The point is, I don't care. But if you wanted to get me to care, I would realize that being in Yuma, Arizona would probably be better than being in Times Square. Yes, that's all I'm saying. Okay. Homes.com. some might say homes.com is the best home shopping site. And Maybe it's because homes.com has a super comprehensive and transparent agent directory. Or could be that homes.com is the only site that always directly connects you with the listing agent who knows the home the best. Perhaps it's because homes.com has the most in depth neighborhood content of any home shopping site that's extensively researched to highlight the personality of each neighborhood. Homes.com goes above and beyond to bring the home shoppers the in depth info they need to find the right home right away. Homes.com We've done your homework.

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[Adam Carolla]

Next story, next story.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Telegram CEO Pavel Durov plans to leave his fortune to his 100 plus children. Yeah, he's the founder of CEO of Telegram, a messaging app. And he's fathered more than 100 children. Some the old fashioned way with three ladies and the rest in a cup.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, really?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah, he started donating sperm way back when and now he's going to split up his fortune, which is worth 13.9 billion. Yeah, but they can't get it. Except for 30 years from today, they don't get anything. No, he's gonna force them to make their own way. And then in 30 years, has he.

[Nate Jackson]

Already been giving them money?

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

I mean, I would assume yes, because he doesn't come up on any child support registries.

[Adam Carolla]

Do you, Nate? Anyone pass away in your family? Anyone leave you anything?

[Nate Jackson]

No, I haven't dealt with a lot of liabilities.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

That's why you haven't dealt.

[Adam Carolla]

I mean, it hasn't happened.

[Nate Jackson]

It's inevitable. Well, it's probably gonna come down.

[Adam Carolla]

It hasn't happened, bro.

[Nate Jackson]

It's gonna be like, bow, bow, bow, bow, bow. Like I know.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah. But yeah. Not dealt with it. But you haven't had it. You haven't had to deal with it.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Right.

[Nate Jackson]

Great older uncle benefactor that left something for me and My family, we got to argue over it or we go to court and find out who gets. I'm seeing it on TV and I've had friends that have gotten property and things like that, but I haven't personally been through it.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

You got brothers and sisters. Do you gotta argue about stuff?

[Nate Jackson]

No, I'm. So we don't. We're. I'm 12 years behind my middle sister and 16 behind my oldest. So by the time I'm standing on a mountain saying something, everyone's listening, like the baby's talking. We're out of line. You know what I mean?

[Adam Carolla]

Is there stuff to leave behind with your family?

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

That's good.

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah. I would say like eight and a half acres in Lacey, Washington. That I think needs to be. We need to figure out what we're doing with that. That some of the family wants to go commercial and sell it for millions and other parts. Like, let's just keep it in our family because why would you sell eight and a half acres of land in a spot where literally grocery stores and apartments and things like that, they're being developed all around.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, so you could put, put a few Trader Joes up and some stuff. Oh, eight and a half acres, you know, makes good size lot and that's big for residential on that side with everything around it coming up.

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah. So they built, they built a, a 400 unit apartment complex next door and a Safeway across the street in the auto zone. And it's in a great area.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, that's worth a lot. Yeah. I would tell.

[Nate Jackson]

My dad knows it, but I'm like, calm down. Well, it was on a lake at one point and the city wanted the lake. Like my. They. He let them buy the piece of our land and run a fence across. So they bought our lake from us. That makes me madder than anything else because I used to go down, literally walk down the hill and go fishing as a kid.

[Adam Carolla]

Really?

[Nate Jackson]

Now you walk down bass, trout. Just staying out of trouble.

[Adam Carolla]

Just who bought the land in the first place?

[Nate Jackson]

What do you mean, the land? Us, I guess. I don't know who the owner was before.

[Adam Carolla]

No, no, I know somebody owned it, but I'm saying your dad. Your dad bought it.

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, okay. Sometimes people.

[Nate Jackson]

So there's, there's, there's like one, two, three, four. There's like six, eight and a half acre lots. And it was like there were two that were residential. Then there was one that was owned by a daycare. That's massive. Right. Another one was our neighbors. The, the, the sprouts. And then sprouts.

[Adam Carolla]

Man, that's expensive turf. Exactly.

[Nate Jackson]

Not the grocery store. They just happen to be.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, that's a net.

[Nate Jackson]

Just a name.

[Adam Carolla]

Todaycare.

[Nate Jackson]

And so.

[Adam Carolla]

That'S a lot of money.

[Nate Jackson]

No, so the daycare is called. It was called Creative Discovery. But anyway, so the. The couple wasn't much older. The kids had gone on and, you know, grown and left home. And so they were empty nesters. And so when. When old Jack passed on, his wife was like, I'm gonna move to wherever fits me better. And they sold their property to the city, and then the other two lots down the way. I don't know how they got it, but the city got the other two lots, and now it's like a big community center. And so they've been trying to get everything from this particular street all the way down, if they can.

[Adam Carolla]

Mm.

[Nate Jackson]

And so I was so mad at my dad. Sold. Yes. And my dad sold a lake. How do you price a lake?

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, man.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

What's the gallon? I think.

[Nate Jackson]

I don't know. Because if you own any of it, you. You have access to all of it. Does that make sense? Like, if there's 50 houses, then the back of the house, you get just maybe even three feet of it. You're like, that's our lake.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, the good news is, as I tell people who sometimes you get in these situations or family things or sometimes even arguments, at least if there's something to argue over, you're still in good shape. You're in better shape than most people.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yeah. No. You had to share your inheritance with your sister, didn't you?

[Adam Carolla]

My sister got a. She got a. What did she get? Did she get a. I got a book. Yep. And I always tell people I got a bag that came in a grocery bag, so that's not nothing. And then. Tony Bennett cd. Yes.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Your sister's borrowing it, didn't she?

[Adam Carolla]

No, I. The Tony Bennett CD was mine. I gave my dad. I just got it back after. After 20 years.

[Nate Jackson]

That's right.

[Adam Carolla]

It's autographed. It's autographed to me. That's why I was curious about where he got that. But I realized he autographed you in the first place. What happened was, is when my dad died, my stepmom gave me what he'd left behind.

[Nate Jackson]

Right.

[Adam Carolla]

Or at least what she determined he'd left behind for us. Right. Which was a Ralph's bag with a book in it and a Tony Bennett cd.

[Nate Jackson]

Okay.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

And I almost took it home because I thought it was freebies.

[Adam Carolla]

And some acreage at set of Washington. No. And. And I opened the bag as a book, and then a Tony Bennett cd. And I looked at the Tony Bennett cd, and it said, to Adam, you know, my best Tony Bennett. And so I thought, my dad got Tony Bennett to advertise a CD to me and never gave it to me.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Weird.

[Nate Jackson]

So he's there at a show, feels the way about asking for his own name on it. This is for my son, Right?

[Adam Carolla]

Except for he would say his son was Jim Carolla, not Adam Carolla, and then get it to him. But also very specific. You are supposing that my dad would go to a Tony Bennett show, which he would never. He wouldn't do it.

[Nate Jackson]

That's not even his speech.

[Adam Carolla]

He likes Tony Bennett, but he would never leave the house. So is this a riddle?

[Nate Jackson]

Is there something.

[Adam Carolla]

It is a riddle. It's a riddle.

[Nate Jackson]

Listen to the CD in full.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, I should listen to it backwards is what I should do. Adam is a dead man. So I called Dr. Drew and I said, was Tony Bennett ever on Loveline? And he goes, yeah, yeah. Back in the late 90s, Tony Bennett came on, and I said, what's the name of that? Let me look. And I looked up the name of the album, and it came out, like, 98, 97. I was like, tony Bennett came on my radio show to promote the sound.

[Nate Jackson]

Okay.

[Adam Carolla]

And then at the end, he made. He autographed it to me, right? And then I was driving home, and I thought, I think my dad would like a Tony Bennett album because he likes Tony Bennett, and I'll just give him the one that Tony gave me. But it's made out to me, right? So then I forgot about it because it's been 28 years. And then when I got it back, I figured it out that this is actually mine.

[Nate Jackson]

Dang.

[Adam Carolla]

So I can't really count that as part of the treasure chest. I just got to go with the book now.

[Nate Jackson]

What's the book?

[Adam Carolla]

Well, that's a little dubious, too.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

It's the Necronomicon. It's abound in human skin, and it. Yeah, wasn't it. Yeah. Unlocks the Book of the Dead. It's the Book of the Dead, basically.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Nate Jackson]

Do you. Are you supposed to listen to that album while you flip through it?

[Adam Carolla]

I would look through the Book of the Dead covered in human skin. No, it's the rational Bible written by Dennis Prager, who's a friend of mine. So I could have gotten the book from him. May have gotten it and given it to My dad, so I could possibly be. Oh, fools.

[Nate Jackson]

Are things right back to you.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Shit, that's it. So what I'm saying is for all the families that are having the squabbles about who's getting the vacation house in Maui, and your sister's pissed because she's. You want to sell, and she wants to renovate and rent. At least it's something.

[Nate Jackson]

Yeah, be thankful.

[Adam Carolla]

Be thankful for that thing. The reason you're having an argument is because there's something right.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, Nate, I know we got to wrap it up here. At least I got a message that said that you out promoting.

[Nate Jackson]

I want to say I've enjoyed God Bless, man. For real. Because when you go into this stuff, like, you're a little uncomfortable at first. You know, I have my coffee, I settled in and stuff. But, man, there's been some moments in here where you've dropped real game on me. Like, I feel like just like we. You had the, you know, the. The. The epiphany of the Wilton being a, you know, a big place. Like, I'm walking into a lot of new spaces that are very big for the first time, and you have done so much stuff in your career you've forgotten. I haven't even seen yet.

[Adam Carolla]

Yet.

[Nate Jackson]

You know what I'm saying? So I really appreciate the game that you put on me.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, thanks, Nate. It's a thrill because, look, if you've been there and you've done that and you've been to these theaters and you've traveled to these places and you've seen it, you know what an achievement it is. And especially two shows at the Wiltern. I mean, that is.

[Nate Jackson]

I just try not to take things for granted. I'm like, yeah, of course there's two shows I'm popping. You know, I mean, I could have that. I've been in the game 24 years, and it haven't mattered, essentially, for 22 of those.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Nate Jackson]

So now that the needle has moved and people want to see what I'm talking about, I'm like, let me step into every space and appreciate them, because I was outside of them before going, can let me in? You know what I mean?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Nate Jackson]

You got to appreciate that game.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, you know, we've all been guilty of not appreciating things. You know, it's like your health. When you're fucking young and healthy, you're great. You don't pinch yourself, and then at some point, shit starts going wrong. And now you wish you appreciated whatever back whenever it's sort of the key to happiness. So God bless you, Nate.

[Nate Jackson]

Thank you very much.

[Adam Carolla]

Keep it going. And by the way, come back anytime.

[Nate Jackson]

I appreciate that. And God bless you. And you too, Mayhem.

[Jason Mayhem Miller]

Thank you.

[Adam Carolla]

This comedy special, Nate Jackson, super funny. It'll be out July 8th on Netflix live dates everywhere. I'll be at Irvine coming up doing a live podcast. It'll be on the 10th.

[Nate Jackson]

Nice.

[Adam Carolla]

And Covina Laugh Factory, you can go to Adam Carolla, you can go to AdamCarolla.com for all the live shows. And until next time, man, for Mayhem and Nate saying mahalo.

[Dawson]

You can leave us a voice mail at 888-634-1744 and be sure and get tickets to see the ace [e-mail].

[Adam Carolla]

This.

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