Jamie Lissow On the Left’s Obsession with Diversity + Raymond Arroyo on New Orleans & His Theater Roots

Summary

Podcast Summary: Adam Carolla Show – "Jamie Lissow On the Left’s Obsession with Diversity + Raymond Arroyo on New Orleans & His Theater Roots"

Release Date: June 19, 2025

Guests: Comedian Jamie Lizzow and Commentator Raymond Arroyo

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Introduction to Guests

The episode kicks off with Adam Carolla welcoming comedian Jamie Lizzow back to the studio and introducing Raymond Arroyo, a commentator and host of the podcast Arroyo Grande. The trio sets the stage for a lively discussion on contemporary cultural and political topics.

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Jamie Lizzow on the Left’s Obsession with Diversity

Jamie Lizzow delves into his perspective on the political left's focus on diversity initiatives. He argues that while diversity is important, there might be an overemphasis that leads to unintended consequences.

• Jamie Lizzow (46:40): “San Francisco is ranked the worst run major city in America.”

He criticizes the inefficiencies in San Francisco’s governance, highlighting issues like "soft on crime" policies and questioning the effectiveness of certain diversity-driven approaches.

• Adam Carolla (50:57): “You need two parent homes, Dads need to stay at home, kids need to be raised.”

This segment emphasizes the link Jamie sees between family structures, educational outcomes, and city management efficiency.

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Raymond Arroyo on New Orleans & His Theater Roots

Raymond Arroyo shares his rich background, growing up in New Orleans and his deep ties to the theater scene. He discusses his experiences in productions like Fiddler on the Roof, which shaped his understanding of performance art.

• Raymond Arroyo (75:00): “I was Perchick in Fiddler on the Roof for six months, touring.”

His insights provide a glimpse into the cultural fabric of New Orleans and how it influences his commentary and work in the media.

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Comedic Segment: Creating Don Hodiak

A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to a comedic brainstorming session where Adam, Jamie, and Raymond invent a fictional character named Don Hodiak. They humorously discuss branding, merchandise ideas, and the potential commercialization of this persona.

• Dawson (12:43): “I have two records.”
• Jamie Lizzow (15:13): “Cause Kodiak's the king of the northern wild...”

This segment showcases their improvisational skills and humor, creating a satirical take on branding and commercialization.

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Discussion on San Francisco’s Governance

Jamie elaborates on his critique of San Francisco, labeling it as poorly managed compared to other major cities. The conversation touches upon metrics like high school graduation rates and family dynamics as indicators of a city's success.

• Jamie Lizzow (46:40): “San Francisco is ranked the worst run major city in America.”
• Adam Carolla (50:57): “You need two parent homes, Dads need to stay at home, kids need to be raised.”

They compare San Francisco’s policies with those of Provo, Utah, which was ranked as the best-run city, attributing its success to strong family structures and high educational attainment.

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Interactions and Theoretical Concepts

The hosts engage in humorous exchanges about various topics, including hypothetical scenarios involving the Don Hodiak character, interactions with celebrities like Rob Schneider and Jerry Lewis, and light-hearted debates on subjects like the effectiveness of turbine cars versus internal combustion engines.

• Adam Carolla (33:24): “It looks like a gun. It shoots cheers. You give the intruder pink eye.”

These interactions add a layer of levity to the episode while maintaining focus on the core discussions.

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Promotions and Concluding Remarks

In the closing segments, Adam promotes upcoming live shows featuring Jamie Lizzow and mentions Raymond Arroyo’s appearances on other platforms like Fox's Laura Ingraham Show. Despite the extensive content, the summary omits detailed advertisement segments as per the user’s instructions.

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Notable Quotes

• Jamie Lizzow (46:40): “San Francisco is ranked the worst run major city in America.”
• Adam Carolla (50:57): “You need two parent homes, Dads need to stay at home, kids need to be raised.”
• Raymond Arroyo (75:00): “I was Perchick in Fiddler on the Roof for six months, touring.”
• Adam Carolla (33:24): “It looks like a gun. It shoots cheers. You give the intruder pink eye.”

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Key Takeaways

• Diversity Initiatives: While diversity is essential, overemphasis on diversity metrics may lead to inefficiencies and unintended societal impacts.

• Family and Education: Strong family structures and high educational attainment are highlighted as key factors in the success and efficient management of cities.

• Cultural Influence: Raymond Arroyo’s background in New Orleans theater provides a unique perspective on cultural dynamics and their influence on media and commentary.

• Humor and Satire: The creation of Don Hodiak serves as a satirical exploration of branding and commercialization, showcasing the hosts’ comedic prowess.

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Conclusion

This episode of The Adam Carolla Show offers a blend of critical discussions on political and cultural topics, enriched with humor and personal anecdotes. Jamie Lizzow and Raymond Arroyo provide insightful perspectives, making for an engaging listen that balances serious analysis with comedic relief.

Transcript

[Adam Carolla]

Well, in this episode, comedian Jamie Lizzow comes back into studio. Also will do news with Alicia Krause and commentator and all around interesting guy Raymond Arroyo joins us as well. We'll do all that right after this.

[Dawson]

The ace man's spending the summer solstice in the hottest place in the nation, Las Vegas, Nevada. Thursday night, Friday night and Saturday night at Jimmy Kimmel's Comedy Club. Two shows Thursday, two shows Friday, two shows Saturday. Lots of tickets and they ain't going to sell themselves. So get yours [e-mail].

[Adam Carolla]

Hey, this is Adam Carolla from the Adam Carolla Show. Summer is here and Podcast one has a brand new sports podcast. It's the all new Pac Man Jones show called Politely Raw. Now on Podcast one, join former NFL star and pro bowl cornerback Pac Man Jones as he brings you his unfiltered takes, raw interviews and stories as only he can tell them. If you love sports, culture and controversy, you're going to love Politely Raw as nothing is off limits. This makes for an entertaining and compelling listen each and every time. The new Pac Man Jones show Politely Raw episodes drop weekly and are available wherever you find podcasts.

[Alicia Krause]

This summer, Pluto TV is exploding with thousands of free movies. Summer of cinema is here. Feel the explosive action all summer long with movies like Gladiator, Mission Impossible, Beverly Hills Cop, Good Burger and Dark of the Moon. Bring the action with you and stream for free from all your favorite devices. Pluto TV stream now pay never.

[Dawson]

From Corolla 1 Studios in Glendale, California, this is the Adam Corolla Show. Adam's guest Today, comedian Jamie LaSalle and the host of the podcast Arroyo Grande, Raymond Arroyo. Plus the news and trending topics with Alicia Krause. And now, if he were a philosopher, his name would be Jean Paul Fart. Adam Carolla.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, get it on. Got to get on the church you're gonna mandate. Get it on. Thanks for tuning in. Thanks, dumbfriend. Thanks for tuning into our YouTube page. Getting lots of traffic there with our vlogs and clips and stuff. So enjoy the Adam Carolly YouTube page. Jamie Lizzow is back in studio. Stand up actor. Tons of dates coming up. Laugh Factory coming up out here. June 20th, 22nd and Covina punchline Sacramento. You can go to jamieliza L I s s o w dot com. Get all the websites.

[Raymond Arroyo]

You know what TV I bought Greg gutfeldsfriend.com just to make it easier.

[Adam Carolla]

Somebody did that to me.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Is that right?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Yeah. Rudy bought AdamCorolla opener.com over to Rudy Bob. It's Just easier.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I had Rob Schneider's friend.com for years, and I changed to Greg Gutfeld's friend.

[Adam Carolla]

I got up.

[Jamie Lissow]

That's amazing. Yeah, I met Rob once at the Fox News studio, and he was really.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Sweet, super nice dude.

[Jamie Lissow]

Like, really nice dude.

[Adam Carolla]

You know what strikes me? I mean, maybe I don't know, you know Rob better than I because worked on his TV show for those seasons. But so there were certain guys that used to be douchey, and Jay Moore was douchey, known as a douche in the industry. Jay's a friend of mine. Jay will be the first. Yeah, it used to be douchey. And then I became nice, and certain guys got the handle of douchebag, and they'll take it to their grave. And then there are others that were douchey early on. It's like a male thing. Rob, I think, used to be douchey. And then somehow I remember. All I remember is I was filming something, I was doing a TV show, and I was asked to play in the Dodger. Hollywood celebrity baseball game or softball, I can't remember. It was one or the other back then, 2005 or 2005 or something. And I was gonna, oh, I have to bring a camera for this TV show. I was working. I was gonna interview the celebrities and the friends and the guys on the team or something. And I said to Rob, like, I ran into Rob, and I said, oh, can I film you for this home improvement show? I'm doing a thing. This is a segment or whatever. And he's like, no. And I remember going, oh, yeah, yeah, you're douchey. Like, I remember you're douchey. And then years later, I run into him as the nicest guy in the world. Now, for guys, it's a chemical thing.

[Jamie Lissow]

You think it's like a testosterone thing.

[Adam Carolla]

Guys are. You gotta hang around long enough. Look, go to your high school reunion. See all the dudes.

[Jamie Lissow]

I was homeschooled. Why do you keep forgetting that I was homeschooled?

[Adam Carolla]

You know what I should say? One should go to one's high school reunion. I don't mean you, Alicia. And I do forget. But no, what I'm saying is any guy will tell you that the dude, the scary dude, the guy who's picking on everyone, the douchebag. You know, you go to your 30th reunion, the guy's got a belly, male pattern baldness. He wants to hug. Now he's waxing poetic about, like, what a good time you guys had, but he's giving you wedgies and noogies and stuff. But, yes, guys get mellow.

[Raymond Arroyo]

It's like a reverse correlation.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, yeah, guys get mellow, women get crazy. That's. That's the tough part. They. They start go. Women start off. They start going nuts, and then guys just get mellow. They don't want to fight and fucking do all this stuff. I have a theory about prepared.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I have a theory about the demise of the douchedom of Schneider.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Am I correct with this, or am I making this.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I hear stories. So I didn't know him during that period, but I do hear stories. You hear stories, and I think a lot of it had to do with meeting the right woman, because I think it's having a witness to your douche, to your behavior. And I think she really, like, she's the kind of person that's very direct.

[Jamie Lissow]

Yeah.

[Raymond Arroyo]

If he was with somebody that would just, like, let whatever go. But she's not, like, she's the most direct.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, because English isn't her first language, Right?

[Raymond Arroyo]

That's right.

[Adam Carolla]

When you. When English isn't your first language, you get to say whatever you want all the time. You go, why does everyone think you're such a douchebag? Because that's what the people will say. I never say, Rob, he has a douchebag.

[Jamie Lissow]

It totally backs up, like, behind every great man is a great woman. I mean, Robert Downey Jr. Has talked about how his wife does that for him, how she just calls him on his show.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Keeps you honest.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, it's good.

[Jamie Lissow]

Keeps you honest, Robert.

[Adam Carolla]

Nicest guy in the world.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Did not have a douchey phase of 27 years like Rob. It was just a. It was a brief encounter.

[Jamie Lissow]

He didn't even answer for himself.

[Adam Carolla]

No. I'm only saying because I like Rob so much now, and I appreciate and I love talking to him. And in a weird way, you know the story of the guy who was the heroin addict and living in his car and robbing, you know, going to open houses and going to the medicine cabinet and stealing. It's a good tip. And stealing medication stuff. That guy being sober for eight years is a better story than the guy who never touched his stuff.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Couldn't agree. That's why I developed an alcohol problem. We have some more to go.

[Adam Carolla]

You want to be inspired. You want to inspire the story.

[Jamie Lissow]

Does it help your stand up too? Like, you can share all of the stories about your alcoholism?

[Raymond Arroyo]

I think so. And I think there's a part of it that is you're very Grateful to be. To be where you are. And I think Rob's kind of going through that too. He's very grateful. He's crushing it. My favorite thing about Rob is watching when he first started doing stand up, they were going to see the guy from the Adam Sandler movies. The guy was watching him sort of get political and then watching people realize it was like the Bob Saget thing.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[Raymond Arroyo]

They watch Full House, go see a stand up. It's much dirtier than they expected. And I got to watch that with Rob and, you know, people walking out, expect. And that's. I remember one night I was setting up our merch and people were like, oh, screw this guy. And I'm like, screw that guy. Buy a T shirt. You know, And I started. I realized that if I sold T shirts to all of the people that were leaving angrily, I was. My bottom line was amazing.

[Adam Carolla]

Were they leaving angrily because they. They expected something? Yeah. They weren't getting.

[Jamie Lissow]

They expected, like Sandler style Netflix movie comedy. Not stand up.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Yeah. And now his audience knows who he is. He doesn't have anymore.

[Adam Carolla]

No, he. And he's morphed, for lack of a better term, into a very strong stand up. Oh, yeah, do it a bunch of times. So look, we cheer for the guy. This is not an indictment. And many, many men pass through this sort of douche.

[Jamie Lissow]

When does it start and end? Because, I mean, your prefrontal cortex isn't fully developed until what, 25, 26.

[Adam Carolla]

Some guys can really hang on for a while. Like Tom Brady. Not that he was a douche, but he was able to stay in the league and be real douchey productive for, you know, into his early 40s. Most guys, it's sort of. It's connected to sort of fucking and fighting. Like when you lose your will to just pick up strange chicks at random bars and guys bump into you and you just sort of look at them and don't say anything versus getting in their face. Like, it. It kind of. It kind of dovetails into that. So lower testosterone, that kind of stuff. It takes a little energy to be a douche.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Yeah. I don't know about you, but if I. If fucking and fighting, I have to fight first.

[Adam Carolla]

You got to fight.

[Raymond Arroyo]

No, no.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. No, I'm not saying same. Oh, you choose one same dad.

[Unknown Speaker]

Oh, I see.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. No, I'm saying one. One might be one night, the other may be several nights.

[Jamie Lissow]

If you fight for a girl, then.

[Adam Carolla]

You'Re probably going to get there is fucking and fight.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I didn't know how Much time we had for fucking and fighting.

[Adam Carolla]

So unfinished. Anyway, I like Rob a lot. Okay, now, we stumbled onto something here. And Jamie, you live in Alaska, right. Which I think that's a nice conversation starter right there.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Yeah. I think that has been the one good thing, because I moved there because of an ex wife. I think we talked about. My kids are up there. But it does give you. You know, there's a reason a lot of comics had airplane material and jokes about that. Like, we all live the same lives.

[Jamie Lissow]

Yeah.

[Raymond Arroyo]

And living in Alaska doesn't make it. It's a good conversation starter.

[Adam Carolla]

So I was saying I've been to Alaska, enjoyed it quite a bit, did some stand up there and fished a little and that kind of stuff. But so when we were there, I was there with Mike August, who books all the stuff, and Dawson went there as well. You see through the screen there. And Dawson is a guy who sings, he does some standup, but, you know, jack of all trades, master of none. I don't know how to call it what I call it. But anyway, the point is this. Mike August said that Dawson should move to Alaska and sort of claim it as his own, much like Don Ho did with Hawaii. Don Ho doesn't possess any discernible talent. Not that Dawson doesn't, but I'm just saying, I don't know what Don Ho does. He's the Hawaii guy.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

And he would. He didn't have a particularly great pipes. You know, he'd just go, tiny bubble handle. And then he hammered checks, being the sort of ambassador to Hawaii. And so Mike suggested that Dawson go to Alaska and rebrand himself Don Hodiak.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Oh, that's great.

[Adam Carolla]

And just the guy who owns Alaska, you know, it's like he. You can't have an event or ask any question if a volcano goes off in Alaska. CNN's gotta get Don Hodiak to comment on it, even though he's not a geologist. He's only been there for 14 months. Right. But he is Alaska. And then we started thinking about songs that Don Hodiak. Cause you gotta do a little singing, you gotta tell a couple of jokes. Well, this is kind of, you know, Dawson's forte is singing and telling some jokes.

[Dawson]

I have two records.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, that's what I'm. That's what I'm saying. Hodiac's King is the name of the song now. We had chat GPT or whatever come up. GPT? Gt yeah, yeah. So you put some music behind it.

[Dawson]

Yeah, I wrote the song before I play this. I Do want to say I experience zero pride in participating in this AI songwriting discussion. And secondly, this is a demo. It sounds as good or as bad as you would expect it to.

[Adam Carolla]

So you. You put the music under this, though, right?

[Dawson]

I went into the studio this morning and produced this little song.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. I always kind of want to tell people, when Dawson is talking into a microphone and you're standing next to him and you're talking to somebody else, there's a good chance we hear you because that's why Dawson's talking in him.

[Raymond Arroyo]

That's because the microphone will amplify your voice.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes. Yeah. That's a good invention. Write that shit down. All right. Anyway, Andrew Dawson, when he's talking to Mike usually means we can hear other people things, too.

[Jamie Lissow]

Poor Andrew.

[Adam Carolla]

But all right, here we go. This is Kodiak's king, right? Okay.

[Dawson]

Up in the land where the cold winds bite.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, yeah.

[Dawson]

Where the mountains rise in the day stretch night. There's a giant in the timber? He's wild and he's free? A shadow on the shoreline just watching me. They say you ain't seen power until you stared one down? And old Don Hodiak knows this bear run town.

[Jamie Lissow]

Oh, my gosh.

[Dawson]

Cause Kodiak's the king of the northern wild? Where the grizzlies roam and the rivers smile? From the salmon runs to the midnight skies. That bear's got fire in his ancient eyes. You can talk Montana or them Yellowstone tracks? But the heart of the wild beasts loud in Kodiak.

[Adam Carolla]

Wow. That's Kodiak's king. That will be Don Kodiak's theme. They'll play that when they announce you on, like, the Tonight show or Kimmel. That'll be the song the band gets.

[Jamie Lissow]

Into if it hadn't been about a bear. I'm from the Bible Belt, and there's like a Bigfoot festival near my parents.

[Adam Carolla]

Really?

[Jamie Lissow]

I feel like you could just tell Chatgpt to change it from, like, the bear to. To Bigfoot, because it's like there's a giant in the woods.

[Adam Carolla]

Now, I've talked to the organizers from the Bigfoot Festival, and they do.

[Jamie Lissow]

They want to have you come do stand up?

[Adam Carolla]

No, but they claim your parents live close to their festival, not the other way around. But. All right. It's semantics. I spoke to some of the organizers before the show. They have a Bigfoot festival next to.

[Jamie Lissow]

Your parents house, like 30 miles away, which in the country is very close.

[Adam Carolla]

Wait, you didn't grow up in Bigfoot country, though, did you?

[Jamie Lissow]

Southeastern Oklahoma. It's the tip of the Ouachita Mountain range. There's, like. There's that where they spare.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, that's where they spot him.

[Raymond Arroyo]

That's better than any song I've ever heard in Alaska.

[Dawson]

Thank you.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I feel like you have a shot. It was so I was like, oh, it's going to be a silly song. I had, like, a tear in my eye.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, no, it's.

[Jamie Lissow]

It was like very, like, Johnny Cash vocals, like, when he does the hurt version.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, like north to Alaska, the song by Cameron North. I mean, why is that any better than this?

[Raymond Arroyo]

It should be supplanted by Bear Bear City or whatever it is.

[Adam Carolla]

The point is, is. Okay, first off, we shouldn't have as much reverence for country and folk songwriters as we do, because the computer shit this one out about 30 seconds. Number one. We just gave it Kodiak.

[Jamie Lissow]

It's shitting it out because it's taking all of the recorded folk and country song. Here's what I want to say in its database.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't want to talk about Burl Ives, but here goes. I could out one of his sons. You gave me a. Two beers and a scratch pad. I would knock that out in five minutes. Yeah, okay. But anyway, Don. Don Hodiak.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Yeah. You know, the Margaritaville guy.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Raymond Arroyo]

What's his name?

[Jamie Lissow]

Jimmy Buffett.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I feel like I could do 10 Jimmy Buffett songs in 10 minutes.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, yeah.

[Jamie Lissow]

Blasphemy, guys.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Raymond Arroyo]

You just take Whatever happened to that day, right, and you find anything relatable and that's it. That escapism.

[Jamie Lissow]

But at least they write their. Like, they. It's just Jimmy writing a song. Right. Like Beyonce and all the top 40 stuff right now. It's like, if you look at the stream of writers, there's literally sometimes 20 plus writers.

[Adam Carolla]

Look, the sad part is. Yeah. When Beyonce has 26 writers and when Stephen Colbert or Jon Stewart win The Emmy and 31 guys come up on stage, like, really? What do you guys all write? A quarter of a joke a week. Like, how does this matter? But believe me, I've been on writing staff. It's three guys who write all the jokes, and then the other 14 people just complain and eat, but no one can fire them.

[Dawson]

There's an old rule in Nashville that if you're in the room when the song is written, you're on the song. I think there is actually a case where a cat got a songwriting credit.

[Jamie Lissow]

Was that Taylor Swift?

[Dawson]

It's totally a joke, but it was to prove the point that if you're in the room, you wrote the song.

[Adam Carolla]

So are we right. That Dawson could go to Alaska, rebrand himself Don Hodiak, and just take. I mean, you know, we would start off small. You'd be cutting the ribbon at Chevrolet dealerships and stuff on the weekend and selling snow. Local snowmobile commercials and stuff like that. But eventually you'd go national.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I would recommend.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Raymond Arroyo]

You kind of start in some. I would say he go to Fairbanks.

[Adam Carolla]

Fairbanks.

[Raymond Arroyo]

And just dominate. I'd give him, like, seven days, and he could be doing. Yeah. New ice cream shop open.

[Jamie Lissow]

Especially with you at his side. Like, he could open for you with that song.

[Dawson]

Oh, let's go, Jamie.

[Adam Carolla]

And then they. Before you know it, a lot of jerky companies coming out of the woodwork. Brand. Brand. There's a jerky, there's a dip.

[Jamie Lissow]

I can see it, like, on a. On a camo hat, like.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Oh, yeah, right.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Chainsaw company.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Mm. And then we go, like, chain of honky tonks, you know, Don Hodiak Saloon. And everything's made out of plastic and bullshit, but it's still that kind of flavortown kind of shit.

[Jamie Lissow]

And only knew him when can call him Dawson.

[Unknown Speaker]

Mm.

[Jamie Lissow]

Right.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Yeah. Mm.

[Jamie Lissow]

There'll be a TV show spinoff.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Yeah.

[Dawson]

Called the Saloon. The Bear's Eye.

[Adam Carolla]

The Bear's Eye. Don Hodiak. It'd be like. And it'd be like, the joke you'd go is, I was so drunk, I saw that bear walking toward me. I only had one eye. And someone goes, don. He was walking away. And then everyone starts laughing real hard. Right? That's where you punch that in. Right?

[Jamie Lissow]

Guys, where are the script writers on this. This thing that we're creating?

[Adam Carolla]

They're working for Colbert right now, but we're gonna get 18 of them away, and they'll just have 26 left.

[Raymond Arroyo]

The Bears are all. Hold it up. Trying to find a way to survive when they run into Don Hodiak.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. And then. Then we start the lore, you know what I mean, about how he killed a Kodiak once by just staring him down. Kodak went into cardiac arrest. You know, like weird stuff. Oh, oh. Indian sidekick guy.

[Dawson]

A moose stopped charging because I asked him nicely.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah. You need. We need a street cred, which is Indian, sort of Native American.

[Jamie Lissow]

He's an Eskimo girlfriend.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Something that. In that indigenous sort of vibe thing who get up there. And he was an eyewitness to this stuff.

[Raymond Arroyo]

A bald eagle showed up with a hairpiece just to impress him.

[Adam Carolla]

That's Right. Write that shit down. Come on, now. That's right. Yeah. He did a feather comb over just to impress Don Hodiak. Yeah, that's good.

[Raymond Arroyo]

It's open. It's. It's. It's open for the taking like that.

[Adam Carolla]

Children's books, Pilsner, beers. Oh, yeah. Liquor. All kinds.

[Jamie Lissow]

Grooming. He has a beard. It could be, like, men's beard wax.

[Adam Carolla]

Beard wax. Don Hodiak beards wax. We put it in the same containers. The dip, by the way, to save money. Obviously, we're going to change the label, but the dip, we don't have to sw. If you don't have to retool. Between the dip and the. And the beard wax, you're set. You're printing.

[Raymond Arroyo]

There's also a third smoked salmon. Just a container.

[Adam Carolla]

That's right. It's small smoked salmon.

[Raymond Arroyo]

No labels. Whichever one.

[Dawson]

Smoked salmon is the name of my weed line up there.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes, yes, A weed line. That's right.

[Jamie Lissow]

That's solid.

[Adam Carolla]

Don Hodiak. And it spins into, you know, modular homes. You know, like, it just. We brand. It's. It's everything. It's. It just keeps going. Hey, you take a look. Because it's untapped. Yeah. You know what I mean? You can't go to Hawaii. Don Ho already did that.

[Raymond Arroyo]

That's right.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. But Alaska wide open.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I'm picturing, like, it's just a big picture of Don Hodiak's face, and you drive into the mouth of the retirement village. Am I thinking too big?

[Jamie Lissow]

Plus, retirement village.

[Adam Carolla]

That's right. Mm. Yeah. Yeah, it's all there. All right, let's work on that. I mean, I think we beat it out pretty good there, fellas.

[Raymond Arroyo]

That feels good.

[Jamie Lissow]

Do we all get a percentage for our creative input?

[Adam Carolla]

Well, you and the cat, I mean, you're in the room.

[Dawson]

I'm keeping the publishing.

[Adam Carolla]

All right. Homes.com. homes.com. Well, some may say that homes.com is the best home shopping site. And it may be homes.com's super comprehensive and transparent agent directory. Or Maybe it's that homes.com is the only site that always directly connects you to with the listing agent who knows the home the best. Perhaps it's because homes.com has the most in depth neighborhood content of any home shopping site that's extensively researched to highlight the personality of each neighborhood. Homes.com goes above and beyond to bring home shoppers the in depth info they need to find the right home right now. Love this website. Love browsing it. I'm a real estate Geek that way homes dot com. We've done your homework.

[Alicia Krause]

This summer, Pluto TV is exploding with thousands of free movies. Summer of cinema is here. Feel the explosive action all summer long with movies like Gladiator, Mission Impossible, Beverly Hills Cop, Good Burger and Transformers. Dark of the Moon. Bring the action with you and stream for free from all your favorite devices. Pluto tv. Stream now. Pay Never.

[Adam Carolla]

I was. I don't know. Somebody tweeted me. People tweet me things they know will anger me, I think. And there's a San Francisco policeman who had the pride patch. He was putting the pride patch on his uniform because I don't know what the story is. He was doing a pride patch for his daughter. Okay, here's the thing. I just want to tell everyone everything right now. No one gives a fuck if your daughter's gay or les, remember? We don't give a shit. Trans, we don't give a shit. Just get the fuck over it. It's all narcissism. You got a gay kid, Good. Go settle it with them or your. Or your maker or nothing. I don't care. Here's my point. I don't want to know that you have a gay daughter or a trans anything. I would like you to just perform your duties, whatever. Fireman cop, airline pilot. I didn't want to know anything about you. I don't care if you're hetero. I don't care if you want to suck occasional cock. I don't care if your fucking son is transitioning. I don't give a fuck. It's all narcissism. You shouldn't assume I want to know. And by the way, I won't tell you anything about myself and my personal whatever either, because I'm going to assume you don't care or want to know. I don't like now. I don't like all the pride month. I don't like all the black history. I don't like any of it because it's all in the service of defining and separating. We're in a big melting pot and multicultural. Okay, well, then stop having separate graduations for black students at Harvard. You know what I mean? Then stop carving. Yeah, stop carving out separate stuff for everyone if we're all just supposed to be one big happy melting pot. Here's the guy. I guess he's from San Francisco. I'm assuming he's a douchebag. And he could be a douche phase. He took his, oh, he's a sheriff hatch on a sheriff. And he swapped it out for the Super Jolly Roger. The gay flag. Now, I don't like it. And everyone is always like, what?

[Jamie Lissow]

Oh, he did get. He has the trans. He updated it too. Cause.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, he got the translator.

[Jamie Lissow]

He got it all in there.

[Adam Carolla]

No one gives a fuck. Do your job. Here's your $63,000 a month. Have fun. Okay, now, he said he did it. I think Andrew told me that. He said he did it on behalf of his daughter. Whatever.

[Unknown Speaker]

Good.

[Adam Carolla]

You love your daughter. I love my daughter. Shut the fuck up. Nobody cares.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Yeah, like, my son's dating a girl. You don't care what they're doing, right? Behind closed doors, heterosexual or home. Like, I wouldn't tell you.

[Adam Carolla]

Film it and I'll fucking render judgment. I don't need to be in the room, if that's what you're asking, weirdo. Me and Don Hodiak will review it.

[Jamie Lissow]

Oh, God.

[Adam Carolla]

I'll use my telestrator and I'll. You know, I know the sport. I'll help the kid. No charge.

[Raymond Arroyo]

It's also on. The uniform is so bizarre.

[Jamie Lissow]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay.

[Jamie Lissow]

Go get a tattoo. Go get something.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes. Tattoo a gay flag on your right ass cheek. Go ahead and do it on behalf of your daughter. So. But, Andrew, you read me that he did it for. It's on other. I don't want it involved with the uniform. And I think people go. And, Andrew, you read that it was. He said that it was because of his daughter to me. But you can read that or you can put it some. I'm asking for. That is what I'm.

[Jamie Lissow]

But could you imagine the outrage? Like, people will be, aw, that's so cute. That's so sweet. But it was like, well, my daughter's in the idf, so I got a Star of David on my uniform.

[Adam Carolla]

People would.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

My son voted for Trump, so he's got a Maga hat he wants to wear on the airplane.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Doesn't uniform mean they're the same? Like, if you're going off brand.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes.

[Jamie Lissow]

Uniform, like, supposed to be across the board.

[Adam Carolla]

Same scream. Yeah. So other towns are doing it. But Andrew, whatever. You read me? You'll just read me again.

[Jamie Lissow]

They do this with the baseball uniforms, though, too. And did you see. So the Dodgers, the aforementioned Dodgers, they did this the other day where they had, like, all of the pride patches on their uniform hats. And Clayton Kershaw went a little rogue. He actually, like, crossed it out and he wrote the scripture in Exodus about how the rainbow is, like, representative of God's promise.

[Adam Carolla]

He was killed by a foul ball later that night. So I'm steering clear of that. Okay, so here's my thing. Me not wanting you to represent the gay flag on your uniform or Black Lives Matter or anything is not me not being for or against anything. It's called a uniform. I don't wanna know where you stand on anything. I just want you to be a cop. Later on, when you're not a cop and you're not in your uniform, then don the nipple clamps and have your best boy pull you through the parade with that chain in your chaps. Just do whatever the fuck you want. But while you're here, I feel the same way. If you work it in and out Burger, or you work as a pilot for American Airlines, I don't wanna know. I don't need to know, and we don't need to know. Diversity is not our strength. Having competent people in positions that are important is our strength, regardless of what they are, where they hail from, or what their sexual proclivities are, what their kids choose to do or what their kids do. Now, this is not a new concept for me because it has been 25 years since I started shouting in a microphone. And it started the day I went down to West Hollywood, first smart cocktail, I was thinking of me day. And I saw a cruiser, a sheriff's car in West Hollywood, and that had the gay flag on the side of it. And then I got onto the microphone that night and started railing about it. And then everyone said to me, what's wrong with the representation? You can pull up tight on it. It has the colors of the gay flag and it's jumbled on the squad car. And I said, I don't want that on the squad car. And then they said, but that's the community. And I go, I don't care. First off, it's less than 50% of West Hollywood is gay. I know it feels like 140%, but it's actually less than 50. So you're representing the minority on your car. But here's the deal. When there's no time for backup and you're running into a house, I don't care whether the guy's gay or straight. And I don't want you to care where the guys, gay or straight. There's just an armed robbery going on and you got the call. And I don't want the separation. I want to assume you're just doing an excellent job for the entire community, regardless of skin color, sexual proclivities, race or religion. That's the world I wanna live in. I don't like the sectioning off. And ever since we started, we just got worse. Yeah. There's nothing that. That says this is an effective way to govern.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Even the format of this, it looks like it says, proudly serving gays.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Hollywood underneath.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes, that's right.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Do you ever feel like, too. Whenever I see, like, a pride thing, I feel like it's someone going, you don't support this. You don't have this sticker. You don't have this badge. I do support the gays, but now I feel like because you're wearing a shirt.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[Raymond Arroyo]

That I suddenly don't. Or if I don't change my profile picture to a thing, does it mean I don't support it?

[Jamie Lissow]

Yeah, well, that's what they want you to think, and that's what they, you know, pound over your head all the time.

[Adam Carolla]

First off, it's all. All roads lead to narcissism. It's just a narcissistic endeavor, number one. Number two, if it wasn't, why the fuck would you have to film yourself swapping the badge out?

[Jamie Lissow]

Sheriff hero, if it was truly for.

[Adam Carolla]

His daughter, then go fucking tell her. Just leave me out of here.

[Jamie Lissow]

Just be like, I love you no matter what. Honey.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes, Knock. Just everyone knock it off. Just go about your fucking business, pick up your daughter, dog's poop, pay your taxes, and let's call the life, shall we? You're super annoying with all your here's who I am bullshit. No one gives a fuck who you are. You work for the city, you make $63,000 a year, and no one gives a shit. Okay? Tried to start your own business. It didn't work, so now you have to do this. All right, fine. Hiro. Shut up. Hiro. Shut up. No one wants to hear about you. And by the way, the reason that the flag is in the shape it's in, because I inquired, I go, why don't you just put a gay flag on the side of the car? That the picture we were looking at? Why not just put the gay flag on there? And they didn't want to. Okay. You know what it is? It's the shape of West Hollywood.

[Jamie Lissow]

I thought it was a gun.

[Adam Carolla]

It looks like a gun. It shoots cheers. You give the intruder pink eye.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Oh, my God.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Did you guys know they had that? Yeah. It looks like a gay gun.

[Raymond Arroyo]

It does.

[Jamie Lissow]

I didn't realize that was the shape of. I instantly was like, wow, this must have been 25 years ago, before we thought guns and cops were bad, because it looks like the shape of a gun.

[Adam Carolla]

To me, the shape of Hollywood is. Or West Hollywood is the shape of a gay gun that shoots jizz. You guys know that?

[Raymond Arroyo]

I never knew that.

[Adam Carolla]

I learned that on Jeopardy.

[Raymond Arroyo]

That's why.

[Adam Carolla]

Did you know that? Okay, well, one more thing I know.

[Raymond Arroyo]

So what is jizz?

[Adam Carolla]

So I don't like it. And I have an answer, and my answer just shuts everyone up. And I said the exact same thing 25 years ago when I saw this and I started complaining about this is 25 years ago. It's before all the assholes with their patches and their prides and their wave. You know, we have to designate this or that. We need a gay toy aisle at Target or before.

[Jamie Lissow]

Oh, gosh, no. It was like the gender neutral toy aisle.

[Unknown Speaker]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

All the virtue signaling that all corporate America and all cops and all idiots and all fake heroes do because they don't really do anything. People that really do stuff don't give a shit about this. This is all the posers. But I would say, what's wrong with them being represented by the community? I'd go, okay, real simple question for you. Glendale, mostly Armenian. Shall they put the Armenian flag on the hood of Glendale cruiser? And if the answer is no, then why not? And then thirdly, shut the fuck up.

[Jamie Lissow]

Let's go through all of the neighborhood. Beverly Wood.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Like, put the hasidum on there. Fairfax. Fairfax. What a fucking dreidel. Let's put the. Let's put the Sabbath candles where the sirens used to be. Fucking idiots. Now, Don. There is going to be a Don Hodiak mobile. I think I can get GMC to underwrite something. It's a Yukon, you know, something.

[Dawson]

Or, you know, we could kind of go the way the Oscar Mayer truck goes and just have a huge redwood.

[Alicia Krause]

Tree and that just drives.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Big red. Yeah, Oscar Mayer, but a big sequoia type tree.

[Dawson]

Or the Moosemobile.

[Adam Carolla]

Moosemobiles. It definitely got a ring to it, but I. I don't know. Is there a lot of redwood trees in Alaska, though? I don't know much about timber up there, Jamie.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I know very little about anything man related.

[Adam Carolla]

You comics don't know anything about timber?

[Raymond Arroyo]

No, nothing.

[Adam Carolla]

So disappointing.

[Jamie Lissow]

What is. What do you think is the number one misconception that people have about Alaska?

[Raymond Arroyo]

Well, for me, it's that where I live is beautiful because Fairbanks is not beautiful.

[Jamie Lissow]

It's all just like a postcard.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Yeah, it's gonna be better with the Don Hodiak branding.

[Adam Carolla]

No, Don hoodie actually come in there and Clean up that town. I don't think. See, I'm gonna say there's a lumber industry in Alaska, but I'm gonna go more like Doug. Fir, pine, and spruce.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Okay.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't feel like it's a redwood thing, but we have to look because we got to get the tree right. We gotta get the species right before we start molding for the. You know, for the big plastic Don Hodiak mobile.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I'm excited for this, man. You know, my car became a moose mobile. If I wait till last call.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, really?

[Raymond Arroyo]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Dawson]

You'll destroy everything in your path.

[Adam Carolla]

I was thinking about the eagle mobile, but any. Any speed over 35, it takes flight, so that's a little design flaw. You can't take it on the freeway. It actually goes airborne after 36 miles an hour. Yeah. What is it? So a lot of lumber. Moose, eagle, bear, bear.

[Raymond Arroyo]

A lot of bears.

[Jamie Lissow]

Do you guys have Bigfoot up there? Is there a Bigfoot?

[Raymond Arroyo]

There's no Bigfoot. I feel like if they find Bigfoot, it's gonna ruin all the Bigfoot fans day. I feel like it's the search.

[Adam Carolla]

You're right. It's like when I find the ghost.

[Jamie Lissow]

Hunter shows where they never actually find the ghost. It's just like I heard something.

[Adam Carolla]

I felt the same way when Lance Bass came out as gay. I was like, oh, okay, well, now who cares? I'm done. It's been something that I've been preoccupied with for, like, 14 years. But. But turn the page.

[Raymond Arroyo]

You know, Alaska is so, like, you know, building, fishing, and, you know, guns. And this one time, a dad of my son's, like, my son's friend's dad, he. His son had a sleepover at my house, and he. I dropped him off at school, and the dad goes, and then they slept over at his house the next night. And he goes, can I talk to you about something? Something happened at your house when my son slept over that I'm not okay with.

[Jamie Lissow]

Oh.

[Raymond Arroyo]

And I go, what happened? And he goes, you let him play Grand Theft Auto, like the video game? And I used to let. My. My kid was little, and I just.

[Adam Carolla]

Said, how old was your son and the friend?

[Raymond Arroyo]

So it might have been a little young, but I had these rules.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, I had rules I'll be never obeyed.

[Raymond Arroyo]

But, yeah, that I did walk in. They might have been 12. And I do remember my son going, dad, I'm really sorry I killed a bunch of cops, but they were about to take this car. And I go, we can't play this version and so he gets. I'm very upset. I go, I'm also upset. I'm sorry. I left him for a minute. I. I would just let him drive. And he goes, hey, kids, had a great time this weekend. And he shows me pictures of my son holding a rifle, killing squirrels in his garden.

[Adam Carolla]

So the dad who had the beef.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Yes.

[Jamie Lissow]

About the video game had put a.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Gun in my son's hand and taught him how. And I'm not from. I don't get this. I don't know that kids that young. But he was like appalled at the fake GTA but had them shooting. It wasn't like an adult behind him. It was my son with a shotgun.

[Jamie Lissow]

Wow.

[Raymond Arroyo]

At 12 years old.

[Adam Carolla]

Did you tell him young age. Did you tell him that all the cops had gay patches on their sleeves? Like, maybe that'll soften the blow a little bit. I feel like he would then stand behind.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I think that would solve everything.

[Adam Carolla]

All right. Lumber out of Alaska. I want to know what. I want to know what they're exporting. Whoever's in that next room. When I ask such a thing. All right, so the dad pulling you aside, going, I want to talk to you about something. Is that always the scariest moment ever?

[Raymond Arroyo]

My stomach draws so nervous. I'm trying to think, who's this guy's wife? What have I done?

[Adam Carolla]

You want to know? I will tell you how to destroy anybody's psyche.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Okay.

[Adam Carolla]

Very easily. All right. You be. You be Jamie.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Okay.

[Adam Carolla]

I'll be the dad whose 12 year old slept over. Okay.

[Unknown Speaker]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Hey, Jamie.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Yeah, what's up, man?

[Adam Carolla]

I want to speak to you about something that went on in your house when my son was sleeping over over the weekend.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Yeah, sure. Something happened.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, yeah.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Oh, wow.

[Adam Carolla]

I'll tell you a year from today.

[Unknown Speaker]

What?

[Adam Carolla]

But see ya. I gotta leave. All your year would just be destroyed.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I just got one of those things with the rings on it. I rip one off.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Just like an inmate. Just cross off every calendar day. And then a year from now, I'll come back and tell you what I'm bothered by.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Should I get a hint so as to what happened?

[Adam Carolla]

So I'm going to say now I got to take my son squirrel shooting, so I gotta go. So surprised.

[Jamie Lissow]

They used a shotgun for that first squirrel shoot.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Can I be honest with you guys? I have no idea if it was a shotgun.

[Unknown Speaker]

Yeah.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I don't know what it was. He was holding a thing that. I think things came out.

[Jamie Lissow]

I grew up around guns and I was totally shooting by 12 years old. But my father would have, like, good boy scout, military retired guy he was. He would have never given a friend a gun. Actually, I don't even think I went shooting with friends unless their parents were present. I would just like to admit it's pretty ballsy.

[Raymond Arroyo]

You just now said to me, you go, was it a 12 gauge? And I just chose to pretend I didn't hear it. I didn't even know what to say.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't know.

[Raymond Arroyo]

It was at least 11.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, well, gauge is one of those things. With wire, at least. Gauge is one of the few things that when the number gets higher, the thing gets smaller.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Is that right?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. So like 10 gauge wire is thinner than 6 gauge wire and metal and stuff like that. I guess it works that way with shotguns. I don't know.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I'm gonna start stabbing my penis using the gauge.

[Adam Carolla]

Use the gau.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I'm gonna use the gauge.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

I also have a silver dollar that's only the size of a nickel if you want to use something as a reference for the pick.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I oftentimes use those airline liquor bottles.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, and say this is 750.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I just got back from Costco.

[Adam Carolla]

I got a. I got 7.50milliliter of Tito's. It rests nicely on my hog. That's good. Yeah. Yeah.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Optical illusion.

[Dawson]

Alaska's biggest exports of the top 10. Wood is not in there.

[Adam Carolla]

No wood. No wood.

[Dawson]

I would imagine, because transporting is a major pain in the ass.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, so what is it?

[Dawson]

Zinc or is number one.

[Adam Carolla]

Hold on, let me see. That's my work on this. Zinc or mobile.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Max. Wife's ring with zinc or number two is gold.

[Adam Carolla]

Gold. Okay, that's good.

[Dawson]

Frozen fish meat.

[Jamie Lissow]

Makes sense.

[Adam Carolla]

Mobile. No, lead. Lead. Mobile. No.

[Dawson]

More frozen fish. This time it's. It's Alaska pollock.

[Jamie Lissow]

Oh. Like they specified the fish.

[Dawson]

Okay, and then number six is miscellaneous frozen fish.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I think the miscellaneous mobile.

[Jamie Lissow]

I think Chat GPT actually screwed up this.

[Dawson]

Crude oil is number seven. Number eight, frozen livers.

[Adam Carolla]

Hold on, let me try. Frozen liver mobile. No, not gonna work.

[Dawson]

Number nine, civilian aircraft engines in other parts.

[Adam Carolla]

Mobile.

[Jamie Lissow]

Now you're dedicated to the mobile.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay. Gotta pull up in something. He's not gonna Don Hodiak's not gonna Uber in a Camry to the big ribbon cutting at the snowmobile place, you know?

[Dawson]

So number 10.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Please be steel. Please be steel.

[Dawson]

Is more frozen fish. Frozen. Frozen Pacific salmon. I think we're gonna have to go for a salmon mobile. And it can only travel upstream.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh.

[Jamie Lissow]

Against traffic.

[Adam Carolla]

That's good. All right. Let's take a break because Alicia has some news, right? I do. We'll get to that with Jamie as well. We'll do all that right after this. Morgan and Morgan. Well, here's the dirty secret the insurance industry may want to keep under wraps. Insurance companies profit by holding on to your money for as long as possible. So after an accident, they might do whatever they can to delay or deny your claim. This way, they can keep those profits growing. Morgan and Morgan fights hard against these corporations to fight to make sure you get every dollar you deserve. I like these guys. I've spoken to them. I think they were out of Vegas when I was talking. Folks I was talking to. Anyway, you've seen the commercials. They're all over. And it's for good reason. When Morgan and Morgan takes on a case, they're almost always going after the big insurance companies and not the individuals at fault. There's a reason why Morgan and Morgan is America's largest injury firm. Am I right, Dawson?

[Dawson]

Hiring the wrong firm can be disastrous. Hiring the right firm could substantially increase your settlement with Morgan and Morgan. It's easy to get started and their fee is free. Unless they win. Just visit forthepeople.com Adam or don dial pound law pound 529. That's for the people.com Adam or dial pound law pound 529. This is a paid advertisement.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, oh, oh. O'Reilly Auto Parts. Yeah, man, I got pipes. O'Reilly Auto Parts. Well, you know the jingle. They're in the business of keeping your car on the road. O'Reilly Auto Parts offers friendly, helpful service and the parts knowledge that you need to keep your car maintained and repaired and thus on the road. Good people. They got a cool hat. I wear it quite often. And I pick up all my parts from O'Reilly Auto Parts. Always did. So whether you're a car aficionado or an auto novice, you'll find the employees at O'Reilly Auto Parts are knowledgeable, helpful, and best of all, they are friendly. So stop by O'Reilly Auto Parts today or you can visit us online@o'reillyauto.com Adam that's o'reillyauto.com Adam.

[Raymond Arroyo]

This one guy came up to me after the show and he was like, hey, comedy guy. And I was like, what's up, man? You know, and he goes, what in the heck's the studio apartment? And so I explained to him what it was. He'd never heard of it, you know, and he goes, do you realize for that much money that you spent, you could get in this town like a 10 bedroom house on about 20 acres of land. And I was like, I know, man, but the only problem is out the front door, you gotta live here.

[Dawson]

Jamie Lissow is on the Adam Carolla show.

[Adam Carolla]

All right. Jamie's got dates all over the place. Alicia Kraus is also going to be doing the news. She has a weekly op ed on the Washington examiner, by the way. All right, what do we got? What's our first story?

[Jamie Lissow]

Well, this should be unsurprising to all of us in this room that San Francisco is ranked the worst run major city in America.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, really?

[Jamie Lissow]

Yeah, according to Wallet, Hub reported it. Apparently they measured the effectiveness of local leadership by determining whether or not a city's operating efficiency was like good or bad. Out of 148 cities in the United States, it was 148.

[Adam Carolla]

So it's like 148 major cities or something.

[Jamie Lissow]

I didn't even know we had like 148 major cities. There's like, oh, 50 top media market. Right. But so some of the cities that, that also were bad were Detroit, Oakland, New York, Philadelphia and Baltimore.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I was just in San Fran. It is so bad if you've been there recently.

[Jamie Lissow]

Yeah, I was there in May.

[Raymond Arroyo]

It's so bad. They had a sign of this that if you see something suspicious to call this number. And I called, I go, dude, I just saw somebody shit in a toilet. And so not sure what is going on here.

[Jamie Lissow]

What is happening?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Okay, so here's, I mean the way I like to describe it, and it keeps happening all the time, but it's a metaphor that I use, which is Jay Leno has his turbine car. It's a Chrysler car, built it in 1963. Chrysler built like 40 of them or something. And I thought this is going to be the future, this turbine jet car thing. And this is the space age. We're getting into the rocket jet, you know, and it just turned out it didn't work. It was just like not efficient. Way too much heat coming off didn't work. And so they immediately just went back to the internal combustion engine. And the internal combustion engine is basically the same engine from 130 years ago. It's just Henry Ford model model A, model T. Model T had pistons and valves and connecting rods and a crank and rings and oil. It's the same thing. Ours are more efficient, they're run by computers and stuff like that. But the same thing because it just works. It's sort of like the Wheel on Henry Ford's model T is still just the same wheel. You guys pulled up in that. He had wood spokes. Yours is a little different. The compounds are a little better. They're puncture proof tires now or whatever. Run flat tires, but it's a wheel. I don't know who's going to improve on this wheel. I don't think anybody where we'll improve on other things. But that's the wheel. There's a way to govern and there's a way to govern that works. And then there's experimental one they try in San Francisco and that they keep trying and they keep trying and it doesn't work. It just doesn't work. And the further blue you go, the less inhabitable the city is now you can go, well, why are you being a hater? And it's like, I don't know, it just doesn't, whatever this thing is. I wish we had a rocket car or a turbine car. I wish it worked. It doesn't work. Internal combustion engine. Cops, rules, regulations, cleanliness. Broken, broken window. Stop and frisk if you need it. That's just what works well. So let's go back to that, everyone. And to me it's like, when is the blue city experiment going to end? At a certain point where you just go, look, just go ahead and apologize it was a bad fucking idea. Admit you got it wrong like Covid, and let's just go back to something that works.

[Jamie Lissow]

Apparently the new mayor, even though it's also a Democrat and obviously the new DA up there, are moving away from that soft on crime policies and you know, on drug use and all that stuff, like all the needles and crap that they hand out, it's ridiculous. But the number one city apparently was Provo, Utah. And they're saying that part of the rate. The rationale that they used for this was high school graduation in Provo is not over 91%. And they're saying that that tends to typically show like what we've talked about a lot is it's like what is the root structure of the city is law and order. But probably also two parent homes that are like, yo, get your ass in school.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes, you must.

[Jamie Lissow]

Compared to places like Los Angeles and San Francisco where maybe you don't have that happening.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes, you need, you need two parent homes, Dads need to stay at home, kids need to be raised.

[Raymond Arroyo]

And then by the way, Provo, Utah, that might be a six parent home.

[Adam Carolla]

That's right. That's right.

[Jamie Lissow]

Five months, five moms.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Yeah.

[Jamie Lissow]

Shows the Importance of mothers.

[Adam Carolla]

I never get the guys who want like seven wives. Like, I'd like five, eight of a wife. Like, I didn't want a whole wife. That's too much.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Can you imagine being like, honey, can I go out with the guys? Yeah, okay. Honey, can I go out with the guys? Just asking.

[Adam Carolla]

5.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Just one lady says votes it down. Yeah, you can't go.

[Adam Carolla]

Imagine the utopia of just having, like, seven, 16 of a wife. You know what I mean? Like, I use her for some stuff, but basically I got the weekends. You know what I mean? Like, why do you want so many of these things? You know what I mean?

[Raymond Arroyo]

That's a lot. That's so much. It's so complicated.

[Adam Carolla]

It's complicated when you get into fractions.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

I'd take 9, 16 of a wife. I think at this should take 9, 16 of a wife. You'd be happy.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I got. I got married eight days ago.

[Jamie Lissow]

He can't say that.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay. Yeah, you can't say that. You can't say that.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I love my wife.

[Dawson]

She's out there.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, get back to me.

[Jamie Lissow]

Can he go out with me?

[Alicia Krause]

Back to me.

[Adam Carolla]

You know what? Hodiacs have a live bait tank.

[Unknown Speaker]

Is that right?

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, yeah, right in the lobby, man.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Yeah, it's gonna be the best.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. When we do the ribbon cutting at the third Hodiac with the live bait tank seven years from now, get back to me on my three. Sixteen of a wide.

[Jamie Lissow]

Maybe Provo, Utah would be a good spin off. Like, it could be the first Lower 48 location.

[Adam Carolla]

Ah, Provo is where you franchise.

[Jamie Lissow]

Yeah.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Trying to hear something really dumb about Provo. I'm not even trying to do a bit. The dry bar comedy specials are filmed in Provo, Utah. You know those dry bars are two of them. And they. Oh, you've done two of them. And they called me up and I knew nothing about dry bar. Keith, you know, Keith Stubbs coming up, and he goes, they shoot it in Provo. And I go, is that like 4K? That's, like, better. I thought it was a type of video quality.

[Unknown Speaker]

I got that.

[Raymond Arroyo]

They're shooting this thing in 4k in pro bow. I gotta do it.

[Jamie Lissow]

That's so interesting. I wonder why. Is there, like, no wine?

[Adam Carolla]

Provo?

[Jamie Lissow]

No, no.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay, so. So Angel Studios is in Provo. Yeah, their studio's in Provo. So they bought. Basically, the corner one is just an old building, and they just took it and they just buffed it out with lights and cameras and whatever. And everything else in Hollywood is sort of modular they come in, they set up, they film, and then they break it down and then they, they leave. If you wanted to shoot a special in a theater in Chicago, they'd come in with a lighting package and four cameras and one roving guy with a Steadicam and all that kind of. This is a big building, probably holds about 300 and change worth of people. Stage locked off, lights locked off, balcony, everything is locked off and the cameras are there. And you know, they literally can just go in and shoot that afternoon.

[Raymond Arroyo]

That's brilliant.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, kind of thing. And it was probably cheap when they bought it. Their offices are next door and so they got their own space. But the guys are Mormon and that's kind of their town. It's clean, it's nice, it's beautiful.

[Jamie Lissow]

Salt Lake City is actually one of the cleanest cities I think I've ever been to in my entire life.

[Adam Carolla]

That begs this question then, because I just got back from Salt Lake and Salt Lake has. Is half Salt Lake from your childhood and half dystopian weirdo. It is my stepdad, Salt Lake, trying to get me to be a Mormon. What would be the opposite of a Mormon? A bunch of nose piercings and tats.

[Jamie Lissow]

And a ski instructor.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, they went weird. They've gone rogue over there. There's a lot of weirdos.

[Jamie Lissow]

Well, there's a lot of weirdos at the university I've spoken at before too.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, really?

[Jamie Lissow]

I mean, anywhere you have like, I think a publicly funded college, you're gonna have some weirdos.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, what. But see what you know. I agree, I agree. What you have over there is the. What was interesting because I was just in Salt Lake last weekend, so I, I said, listen, I'm from la, we have weirdos, but they're, they're sort of broken in weirdos. You guys have like newly minted fighting you there. You guys are rebelling. And then I've always said, like, when you take like the Japanese culture, take like Japanese men, they're either super buttoned up, thin tie, lots of bowing, or they have purple hair and a slammed Acura and they've gone completely off the fucking plantation. Right?

[Jamie Lissow]

Where do the Yakuza fall? Are they somewhere in there?

[Adam Carolla]

The mafia? Yeah, well, they're just the mafia. They're trying to make money. But the point is. Okay, I'm just gonna dovetail into theory. I'm from LA. Dr. Drew's from LA. Mark Garrigo's attorney's from LA. No tattoos, no piercing, no accoutrements, no LA anything. The idiots who move here from these parts, unknown, who come here do an impersonation of a guy they think would be from la. And that's where you get cool dude and tatted, sleeved up arm and stuff. They're not from here. People from here, we don't care there. So what you get in Salt Lake is a bunch of people that started off with the Mormon scene and then broke away. I'm going nuts now, and it can't be quiet. They have to go, like, overt. Here's who I am now. And so you see all the tattoos and all the ones that broke off, broke hard.

[Raymond Arroyo]

And when you break, don't your parents not talk to you anymore? I think you're kind of on your own.

[Jamie Lissow]

I don't think that. That Mormons do that were, like, raised. I have friends that were raised Mormon that aren't in the church anymore, and they still have relationships with their families. They might be, like, somewhat fractured. I don't think it's like the extreme of Scientology or.

[Dawson]

They still have relationships, but they will not share the same heaven when they're dead.

[Jamie Lissow]

Yeah, they. They do believe that.

[Unknown Speaker]

Yeah.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I wouldn't mind. I wouldn't mind that you don't want.

[Jamie Lissow]

To spend eternal life with your mom.

[Adam Carolla]

You know what I mean? I think Don Hodiak has to have a Saint Bernard named Gus.

[Unknown Speaker]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Now, don't worry, we'll have Gus one, Gus two, Gus three.

[Jamie Lissow]

Not a husky.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, that's what you'd expect.

[Jamie Lissow]

Oh, you're not expected.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I'm picturing a dog sled where he's running and the dogs just get to.

[Adam Carolla]

Ride in the back. That's what I mean. That's on the T shirt right there.

[Dawson]

Dog's got to be drinking a beer.

[Adam Carolla]

Dog's drinking a beer and eating salmon. That's right. Don Hodiak. And he's got one of Don's loggers on a stick with a string holding it in front of Kodiak, who's trying to get it with his mouth. Right.

[Alicia Krause]

Smart.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Goes 100 miles an hour.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, what else? Yeah, San Francisco is a piece of. They're gonna have to change. Look, Blue City. Sorry, it just doesn't work. You gotta change.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Just for two seconds. When they asked me what. When you do your dry bar, they go, we're gonna put it on, like, Amazon prime or something.

[Jamie Lissow]

Yeah.

[Raymond Arroyo]

And they asked me what. What I wanted to call mine, and I'd like no time to. It was like a conference call. And they go, what do you want to call It. And so I just Trying to think of a funny. I go, what if we call my spec is really clean, you know, I go, what if we call it. Jamie Lisso tries not to say the F word for an hour, and they go, nah, that's, like, still kind of dirty. And so I go, what if we call it. Is it Mormon here or is it just me?

[Adam Carolla]

Ah, that's funny.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Wasn't called that either.

[Adam Carolla]

No, but that's good.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Yeah, they shot both down.

[Adam Carolla]

So did. Did you do one?

[Raymond Arroyo]

Yeah, it's called something awesome. It's on Amazon or something.

[Adam Carolla]

Wait a minute. Dry bar should be on. Should be on YouTube and then on the Dry bar page.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I haven't checked into it in a while.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, it's gonna be. Well, we'll get.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I think it might have been. I did it a long time ago. I was like, back when they first did it. But I think you're right. That new. There's the app, right. They got the. Is on YouTube. Okay. That's different than Amazon Prime. Right? Just checking if.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay, it is. Okay.

[Raymond Arroyo]

All right.

[Adam Carolla]

All right. Because I tried to order a whole thing of cashews from YouTube the other day. I'm still waiting. So maybe that's. Maybe that's what the issue is, because I'm with you. I didn't know there was a difference. All right, what else we got? Alicia Cross.

[Jamie Lissow]

All right, well, if we're talking about religion, can we talk about how this. This is, like, very heartwarming. This NCAA baseball team stopped caring about winning to focus on Jesus. And then they went to the World Series. This is fun. Apparently the players added scripture to a plate called wristbands as the team went from one to six start to the championship contenders. The college baseball team nearly saw Messiah University this year. So the Messiah Falcons made their way all the way to the Division 3 World Series Championship earlier in June. And it was one of their most historic seasons ever. And they actually said it's because they started focusing on their, like, mental and spiritual health in the clubhouse instead of focusing on winning. I actually think that. I feel like Arthur Brooks or other psychologists, I don't know, Jordan Peterson and others. There has to be something about, like, whether it's Jesus or another element of faith, like when you kind of have a mental shift and maybe, like, take something out of focus or don't prioritize it as the most important thing of your life, then. And other things around your life start to improve, then that thing improves.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Yeah.

[Jamie Lissow]

I don't know. Is there a psychology behind that.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Don Hodiak's got of a falcon, by the way. This team was the Falcons. You gotta. You gotta be. You gotta do falconry too, right? Yeah.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Is perfect.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Sorry, what were you saying about that team? They're called the Falcons. That's all I got.

[Jamie Lissow]

They were pay off an umpire or something.

[Adam Carolla]

And when.

[Jamie Lissow]

No, they did not pay off an empire, cuz that wouldn't be biblical.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, okay.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I always wonder in sports when there's a God. Almond. I've seen a UFC fight where both guys are like, God's going to help me win.

[Adam Carolla]

What does he do?

[Raymond Arroyo]

What does God do?

[Jamie Lissow]

Who does God root for in the super?

[Raymond Arroyo]

Does that just cancel it out?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah.

[Raymond Arroyo]

And should he be doing something more important?

[Jamie Lissow]

Probably.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Is that like an annoying text you're getting from a friend that keeps coming in? Is that like.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Do you guys do. Okay, let's see how honest we can be here. UFC is an interesting. It's a kind of an interesting yardstick to sort of measure your biases. You know, I think if you take your average human being, or just let's say American and two UFC guys go into the ring, right? One guy's black, one guy's white. Right. I will root for the underdog. Normally, I'll see whoever has the worst record that's I root for.

[Jamie Lissow]

But unless they're an American, then I'm like, let's go American.

[Adam Carolla]

Then if the American guy and the other guy's Croatian or something, then you go with American. And then like, if the black guy's American and the white guy's Croatian, then you're gonna go with the black guy. But if the black guy is from America and the white guy's from America and the white guys from Sherman Oaks, Van Nuys area, and I go, that's not too far from North Hollywood. Then I might vote for him. But when every. And I'll even do things on tattoos, I'll take the least tattooed guy, which.

[Jamie Lissow]

Is really hard to find.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, well, like I said, least. You know, they may all be tatted, but I'll take the guy with less.

[Raymond Arroyo]

He's got a short sleeve.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, right. Yeah. He's wearing. He's got a wife beater tat. Sort of a long sleeve. So the point is, is eventually, when all other options are exhausted, I'll just go with the white guy because that's all I got left at a certain point. I don't know, it's just a white guy and a black guy. I've exhausted every other possibility and I gotta pick a winner. I gotta root for one of them, and I'm done with everything else. They have the same amount of tattoos. They're both from the Van Nuys, Sherman Oaks area. They both have the exact same record. Neither one are favorite. Yeah, they're from the Van Nuys Sherman.

[Jamie Lissow]

See, I go to. This is the. This is the female emotional person me. I'll be like. I'll look at their Instagram, and I'll see if they're, like, married with kids. And then I think that's really sweet. So I'm like, oh, they're like a family guy. Oh, I like that.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, I got one more that I need to exhaust. I'll always go for the dad bod versus the chiseled guy.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I'm just gonna say that if there's a bodybuilder and a guy with a little gut, I want that other guy to win.

[Adam Carolla]

But once I exhaust it all. Yeah.

[Jamie Lissow]

Do you ever root for the old guy versus. Because Manny Pacquiao was about to fight a guy that was, like, the gatekeeper born six months after Manny Pacquiao, like, had his very first fight.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Do you root for the old guy now that you're older? Because I absolutely root for anybody that's in, like, their 40s in the UFC. I go, this guy.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, yeah.

[Raymond Arroyo]

No, you're saying all you.

[Adam Carolla]

You're saying, I went to both of their pages. They're both loving fathers of. Of twin girls.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I don't know if there's a cowboy.

[Adam Carolla]

Once it's all gone and I got nothing left, you go, like. I'll just go with the skin color.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I don't know if there's a cowbout, but I hope they tie.

[Adam Carolla]

It's a draw. Yeah, okay.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Just majority.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't know. I. Listen. Mexicans would definitely go with the Mexican dude, but it doesn't seem to be that. We, like, cheer that turns into Dos Equis commercial. So why can't I go with the white dude? Everything's exhausted. Yeah, the Mexicans always would go with the Mexicans.

[Jamie Lissow]

Russian one, just not, like a Russian one.

[Adam Carolla]

There's, like, a lot of you can't keep. All right, so. But both of them are Russian now, right?

[Jamie Lissow]

Well, then I'm rooting for them both to get knocked out.

[Adam Carolla]

Alicia Crouse. You understand the scenario. The one's not from North Hollywood and the other's from. I didn't go to high school. The one. The other's from the Soviet Union. Because then I would vote for the black guy who Went to North Hollywood. It's once. Everything is the same. I appreciate your honesty. You understand this, Jamie, right?

[Raymond Arroyo]

I understand completely. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay.

[Jamie Lissow]

You can't answer it.

[Raymond Arroyo]

It's very hard to answer because everything I'm gonna say is changing. A variable.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, everything's the same. And then again, like I said, if it was a Hispanic guy and it was a Dos Equis commercial, then the guy would. And they'd like it. Right. Okay. That's no problem with that. Who did. Cain Velazquez, the Spanish Mexican heavyweight. This, I think he had a big tattoo, just said brown power on his chest, and all the Mexicans would go nuts when he came in. And so, you know, Brock Lesnar had a big white power on the back, and I was like, standing up screaming. That'd probably be a different. Different. Optically different.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Different. Different.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[Jamie Lissow]

Do you guys watch chick fights? Because we. Well, my husband. Some friends will have fight night and they'll come over and we get takeout and, like, stick the kids on a Disney movie and like, we'll watch fights and stuff.

[Adam Carolla]

Stuff.

[Jamie Lissow]

And sometimes, like, the fights before the main card are really good, but I can't bring myself to watch two chicks fighting.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Yeah, tough. Tough to watch. I. I have the thing where I was a huge UFC fan and I watched almost every single pay per view, every single fight night.

[Jamie Lissow]

Yeah.

[Raymond Arroyo]

And then I. A friend of mine was fighting in the Alaska Fighting championships, where I imagine you'll do the announcer.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, yeah. The face of the Alaska fighting.

[Raymond Arroyo]

And seeing it in person, it was very hard to watch it anymore because I saw him get kind of hurt and his son was sitting with me, eight years old, and for some, it kind of ruined it for me.

[Alicia Krause]

So I.

[Raymond Arroyo]

But I. With you that I would have trouble watching girls fight, even back then when I was a huge fan.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. You said to the boy, like, after a third round, let's go home and play some Grand Theft Auto and see if we can just unwind a little bit. Here I go.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Let's go home with the other guy.

[Adam Carolla]

Let's go to a little first person shooter game and see if we can just kind of change our mindset over here. Yeah, let's go kill some cops in my living room. Oh, Brown pride is what Cain Velasquez says. So I. With Lesnar, just say white pride, and.

[Jamie Lissow]

It wasn't even Lesnar. Like, brown power.

[Adam Carolla]

I had the pee part, but I forgot the rest. So he has brown pride, and all the Mexicans go nuts. So Brock Lesnar does brown, does black, does White pride. And then I stand up in cheers. That feels healthy to me, or at least universal. Okay, yeah. Okay. Yeah.

[Jamie Lissow]

I did a little bit of the dad bod there.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. All the Mexicans have a little bit of the dad bod, which is nice. That's what makes him angry.

[Raymond Arroyo]

I feel like a lot of those guys train for ufc. Like. Like now they're training for mixed martial arts. Back in the day, it used to be a little bit of body refining, bodybuilding, all this stuff. Velasquez is a. He's a beast, man, to be fair.

[Adam Carolla]

And Alicia, what you were saying. I do not want to see two women get into the octagon and beat the. Out of each other.

[Jamie Lissow]

Right. And I, and I identify as a feminist, but that doesn't seem.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't want to see it.

[Jamie Lissow]

Can't we be better than that? Like, I feel like there is differences. There are major differences, physically, emotionally, whatever, between men and women. Like, I don't want to see women acting in that brute.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, I think you're misinterpreting. I don't want to see two women beating the shit out of each other. I will watch a guy beat the shit out of a woman. So I'm kind of going. I'm going a little deeper, I think. I think you thought I was going another. I didn't finish Kane Velasquez over the can. Whoop ass on a bitch. Yeah, that'll pin it for.

[Raymond Arroyo]

Guy with like a male pride tattoo.

[Adam Carolla]

Male pride.

[Jamie Lissow]

White male pride tattoo.

[Adam Carolla]

That's right.

[Jamie Lissow]

In a wife beater.

[Adam Carolla]

Literally a wife beater. All right, let's see. Raymond Arroyo is waiting in the wings. Good dude. See him all the time on Fox, right?

[Dawson]

On Laura's show.

[Adam Carolla]

Laura's show. See him on Laura's show all the time. Very funny guy. Interesting guy. All right, we'll take a break, we'll bring him in. Alicia Krause. I'll give you a plug at the end. Jamie, you as well. Do a one on one with Arroyo right after this. You ever look back and wish you'd bought Bitcoin for a nickel or grab some Nvidia before it went nuts? Yeah, yeah, me too. But here's something you don't want to miss out on. Protecting your family's future life insurance. Well, it's like a parachute. And if you don't have it when you need it, well, you're going to be out of luck. And trust me, you do not want to be the guy who leaves their family with nothing but a stack of old Concert tees. Even though they got some street value, you need life insurance. Select quote makes it easy. No hunting through a million confusing options. Their agents shop top rated companies to find a policy that fits your health, lifestyle and your budget. And they do it for free. That's right. So skip one of your streaming services this month and get real peace of [e-mail] don't let future you handle it. Do it now. Selectquote.com right Dawson.

[Dawson]

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[Alicia Krause]

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[Adam Carolla]

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[Alicia Krause]

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[Dawson]

It's time to check Adam's voicemail.

[Adam Carolla]

Hey ace man slop dog calling you from Denver. I got your 20 minute rant locked up for you. Elevator etiquette, young chicks, the young dudes. Even if you're on the elevator getting off on the third floor and you stop on the third floor, the people that are waiting are staring at their phone and their bum rushing into the elevator before you even have a chance to get out. Get it on dude. See ya.

[Dawson]

You can leave us a message at 888-634-1744.

[Adam Carolla]

Raymond Royo is in studio. Raymond, you will see all the time on Laura's show on Fox but also doing really interesting interviews as well. Laura Ingraham show obviously. And I watch you and I just watch and I go, well this guy's funny and this guy's smart, but I don't know where I know him from. Like I don't know, I don't know him from stand up and things of that nature. So I don't know what category you put put yourself into.

[Unknown Speaker]

Isn't this the problem, Adam? I mean, look, I saw you with Shane Gillis and Dr. Drew at the Sony theater in New York and it was a night where I was supposed to go to a show. I heard you all were in town. I got a ticket and walked in, just had drinks, watched it, had a hell of a time. Great time. I didn't think of you at that time as a standup comedian. I thought of you as a TV guy, a TV host? Yes, and somebody who did set pieces, but not a stand up. And that night you convinced me you're actually a stand up.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, well, thanks.

[Unknown Speaker]

And you've been doing it for a long time.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, but it was.

[Unknown Speaker]

I don't mean to take over the.

[Adam Carolla]

Show, to be fair to your brain. It was later on in life. It was radio and it's TV and lots of other stuff.

[Unknown Speaker]

And that's how I. And I've kind of stumbled in the other way. I started as an actor. I was in. I was in the West End, I was off Broadway. I was on Broadway directing. And then I hated touring. Hated it. The worst life you can have. And I decided I have to get out of this. And I became a third string theater critic at the Associated Press. A friend of mine got me an interview there. I worked my way into hard news, covered the Capitol, started writing for Bob Novak. Remember Bob Novak?

[Adam Carolla]

No.

[Unknown Speaker]

He was at Capitol Hill. He was the dean of the Washington press corps. Oh, Capital Gang, Crossfire. You don't remember those shows?

[Adam Carolla]

You know, you have to understand, my background is poor dude from North Hollywood who wandered on a construction site, worked as a laborer and then worked as a boxing coach later on. So I don't have.

[Unknown Speaker]

You had two TV shows when this show was on. You had two TV shows on cable when Bob Novak was doing Crossfire.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes, I do remember Crossfire.

[Unknown Speaker]

And I helped produce that show.

[Adam Carolla]

And I also formally had no interest in politics. My only interest in politics really is derived from people making bad decisions and ruining places I live.

[Unknown Speaker]

And your life?

[Adam Carolla]

Yes. I don't really want to be involved with politics. But I had 14 year old twins when Covid hit and their school was shut down. So now I've been thrust into politics because I then announced they should open the school. And now I'm in politics. You're the bad guy. I want them to not shut the school down. And then I have friends from high school, have a 50 year old family business called Tinhorn Flats about two miles from here in Burbank that gets a fence put around it because they shut down outdoor dining and they don't comply. And now all of a sudden I'm in politics, but I really just wanna be left alone. But if I live in a place where people are making horrible decisions that affect me and my family, then I must be in politics.

[Unknown Speaker]

But they keep making the bad decisions. This is how much longer I'm gonna ask the big question. I listen to your show often. How much longer can Adam Carolla stay in this state? In this city?

[Adam Carolla]

No, I'm gonna be building in Nevada. I am building in Nevada as we speak. So, Raymond, your background is diverse. You start off as theater journalism. Theater journalism. Where do you grow up?

[Unknown Speaker]

New Orleans, where I live now.

[Adam Carolla]

Wow.

[Unknown Speaker]

I moved back to New Orleans.

[Adam Carolla]

Everything about you, sort of interesting, surprising.

[Unknown Speaker]

Isn' Think New Orleans. But that's why I. Born and raised in New Orleans.

[Adam Carolla]

You have a. You know, you're not LA, NY kind of thing. Something is different in theater. So for you, like what? What roles and what production?

[Unknown Speaker]

I was Perchick in Fiddler on the Roof for six months, touring.

[Adam Carolla]

So you sing?

[Unknown Speaker]

Yeah, and I still do a little bit. I did a Christmas album about a year ago. I'll send it to you. You'll love it.

[Adam Carolla]

Please. And I know you interview all these interesting people, like Mel Gibson and Mother Teresa and folks like that. Now I see Jerry Lewis here.

[Unknown Speaker]

Have you ever seen that interview with Jerry Lewis? Yes, one of his last interviews.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, that begs a question then, which is, I don't want to make it about myself, but I had a guy and I got in a problem with him, and I won't bore everyone with the story, but I sent out a tweet that was like a little bit of a slight on him. And then he wrote back, hey, man, why are you talking shit about me?

[Unknown Speaker]

Jerry Lewis did.

[Adam Carolla]

No, another guy.

[Unknown Speaker]

Oh, another guy.

[Adam Carolla]

I was just making a joke. And then I wrote him back, sorry, I shouldn't have made that joke. You're right. And then two months later he was dead. And I'm glad I didn't write back. Mind your own business. Fuck off. I wrote back, sorry, you're right. And then he died. But I would have been haunted if I told him something horrible. And so Jerry Lewis gives like, his last interview. He's a total douchebag. And then he dies. And in a weird.

[Unknown Speaker]

But he wasn't a douchebag to me. He was a douchebag to the Hollywood Report.

[Adam Carolla]

That's my point.

[Unknown Speaker]

Do you know why, though?

[Adam Carolla]

When did you interview him?

[Unknown Speaker]

I interviewed him about it. I actually interviewed him a year before that illustrious interview where he said, yes.

[Adam Carolla]

No.

[Unknown Speaker]

Right, no.

[Adam Carolla]

And he was what year of age when you.

[Unknown Speaker]

90. He was 90 years old. The interview I did with him, he was ready to talk the day before I arrived. You'll love this. I'm about to show up. The BBC was there the day before at his home to interview him about that movie, the Day the Clown Cried, that he never released. It was a piece of crap film.

[Adam Carolla]

Did you see it?

[Unknown Speaker]

Yeah, I did. I saw clips of it. He showed me clips of it.

[Adam Carolla]

The one with the weird sort of Nazi clown. It's a clown or something.

[Unknown Speaker]

It's a clown taking children to the death camps, to the showers. It's not exactly, you know, this isn't, you know, the family jewels or nutty.

[Adam Carolla]

Professors, kind of the wicked clown, but it exists.

[Unknown Speaker]

Well, now they found a whole cut of it, but it's never been released. This was. But anyway, the day before I arrive, BBC is there because they're doing a documentary on this film. He throws them out. He gave the guy three questions, threw them, the crew out. So I arrived, and they're like, take it easy. Jerry's throwing everybody out. I walked in. It was his birthday. I brought him a box of Fonta. He loved that. You know, that horrible orange drink. That Fonta drink. Yeah, Orange Fonta. I gave him that. Broke the water. From that moment on, it was like we were the best of friends. That interview. He's warm, he's sweet, but he was horrible to so many other people.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, Fanta, which most people say Fanta.

[Unknown Speaker]

I know.

[Adam Carolla]

I think that's what it is.

[Unknown Speaker]

I was just in Nashville, and they said this. Well, I'm a New Orleanian. I'm allowed to say Fonta if I want to call it. It took me a second, and it's Fanta. Is that what it's called?

[Adam Carolla]

I hear Fanta. I'm from.

[Unknown Speaker]

I hear vomit. I would never touch.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, look, there.

[Unknown Speaker]

He.

[Adam Carolla]

There's certain things that people have, you know, certain things like mellow yellow and stuff like that. I go, I'm from North Iowa. It's not a. Not a thing. We have. So you. You went in and you got on his good side, and you had a good sit down with him.

[Unknown Speaker]

I had done the research. I do take time. I don't just wing this stuff. I mean, I. I. I had folders on Jerry. I was ready. I'd seen all the movies. I watched them all. I pulled all the. I did the whole thing. So when I walked in, he knew I was asking questions that were informed, and I could respond to him and counter him in ways that he respected. The other kid goes in and says, shouldn't you have retired a long time ago? How did you and Dean break up? Oh, of course he's gonna get pissed off. He's 90 years old. Come on.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, also, there is a thing where people. Okay. When you're being interviewed.

[Unknown Speaker]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

And you realize that the person didn't take Five minutes to do some sort of cursory bio on you, to look up a couple of things. When that happens, you realize this person doesn't really care and is not really interested. And this isn't a big deal to this person. So that's kind of what I.

[Unknown Speaker]

It's disrespectful and some people are more dis. He had nothing to push Jerry. I'd been wanting to interview him for a long time. He finally acceded to the interview. Well, you go in there, you gotta be ready to interview Jerry Lewis. So we did the whole career. It was great, been fun and he's warm and cutting and nasty. We made news he endorsed Trump in the interview, which was crazy. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

What was Mel Gibson like?

[Unknown Speaker]

Mel. I've known Mel for 20 something years, so it's hard to say what he's like. Mel is a mad genius. I mean, Mel has this visual sense, Adam, that other people don't. He sees these images and they. And then he. So the whole filmmaking process is him trying to recreate this thing he's got in his head. And it's so clear to him. It's white hot blaze for him. He's got to create just that. And he's a madman on set. He's far more interesting than anybody he's directing when he's on the set. He's a fascinating guy. He's got a bold vision. I mean, look, any of his films. Apocalypto, Passion of the Christ, it all holds up, up. And he's doing the resurrection now. He's working on that.

[Adam Carolla]

How did it come about with you and Laura Ingraham? How did you become a staple of her show?

[Unknown Speaker]

I walked in to do a book interview. I had a book that I'd written. We did the interview, we did the segment at the break. She said, can you stay? You want to stay for another segment? I guess it went well. I said, yeah. And then we went into another segment and then we just started talking about news of the day. It clicked, you know that you had that with Jimmy, you have that with Drew. You either have that chemistry or you don't have it. But if you have that click, you can really talk about any damn thing and the audience will come back for it because it's a relationship they're there for. And that was. It really started in radio. Then Roger Ailes wanted us to do a Show back in 2008.

[Adam Carolla]

Wow.

[Unknown Speaker]

And we turned them down. We did a summer version of it for three weeks, five o' clock slot. But she had just adopted a little girl. I just had a newborn. And we talked about it and said, you know, this is bad timing. We're doing a radio show all day. I've got another show I'm doing on cable. And then we've got this. We will never be able to come up for air and these children will be utterly ignored. So we told Ailes, no. We are the mother and father of Glenn Beck, I'll have you know. Cause he got the slot.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, really?

[Unknown Speaker]

Yeah. That's who got the five o' clock.

[Adam Carolla]

Slot, by the way. The podcast Arroyo Grande. And it is out as we speak. Yes, thank you. And you can find it wherever you find finder podcasts.

[Unknown Speaker]

Where are those fine. Where are the finer podcasts?

[Adam Carolla]

I don't know. Everywhere. I just. I remember as a youth, when they talk about, they do like a game show or talk show in the 70s and they go botany 500. You can get it at Sears and Woolworths. And wherever they find. Wherever you find finer men's retail, you know, they go finer as opposed to those other crappy men's retail, they just go finer. And I just thought, I'm just going to add that to everyone's podcast or what have you.

[Unknown Speaker]

It gives it a little distinction. It's like Corinthian. Fine Corinthian leather. What the hell is that?

[Adam Carolla]

Vinyl?

[Unknown Speaker]

Did Ricardo Montalban ever tell us.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't think he ever knew. I think it was a paycheck. I think he probably drove Mercedes Benz. And there was a time when it was very in vogue for car companies to talk about the other manufacturers and go, your Ford Granada, you'll be mistaken for driving a Mercedes Benz. Now they realize that comparing your car to better cars is probably not a good way.

[Unknown Speaker]

Don't do that. Just talk about the fine Corinthian lady.

[Adam Carolla]

No, you know what he'd say? He'd go, I love what they've done to my car. His car. It was his. They've done what they've done. The Ricardo's car, that thing had opera windows in the back, a landau roof. Imagine the gall of in the 70s, upholstering the outside of the roof.

[Unknown Speaker]

Well, you gotta go, that's fine. Now that's a finer trim, right?

[Adam Carolla]

But my feeling is you guys can't invent a dashboard that doesn't explode when the sun hits it. You think upholstering the roof of the car, you think that's gonna hold up?

[Unknown Speaker]

That's a selling point. Well, you never know.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, we have the commercial I like the music. It's probably going to remind you a lot of your. Your heritage.

[Unknown Speaker]

Okay.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. We've cushioned Cordova's ride with thick rubber mounts at all suspension points. Our patented transverse front suspension keeps Cordoba's ride luxurious. Cordova. To drive it is to experience the pleasure of a truly road worthy automobile. In the Chrysler tradition of luxury. The yes, even rich Corinthian leather.

[Dawson]

Chrysler engineering achieves fuel economy for the times.

[Adam Carolla]

Styling in timeless good taste.

[Dawson]

You owe yourself a ride in this new, smaller Chrysler.

[Adam Carolla]

Cor.

[Dawson]

I like what they've done to my car.

[Unknown Speaker]

Oh God, you got the call line. I forgot that part of it. I like what they've done to my car. I love how he rubs the seat like it's his mistress. He gives it, you know, gives it.

[Adam Carolla]

A nice rub down like a genie was going to come out of the glove box.

[Unknown Speaker]

Very sensual. Ricardo. He, well, he was the Latin lover in the movie.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, what is your ethnicity or heritage?

[Unknown Speaker]

Spanish. Ricardo and I get on well. He was Mexican, but my father was from Spain, from Barcelona. Grew up in Guatemala. My mother's Sicilian. So you know, that Pazan, that part of the.

[Adam Carolla]

Came here to do what here to New Orleans?

[Unknown Speaker]

My father, when I walked in here, I felt so at home. You know why? My father had an auto mechanic shop for years. Oh, he did that. I swept and had to change the damn brick.

[Adam Carolla]

You wanted to go to Broadway. He must have been devastated.

[Unknown Speaker]

No, he wasn't actually. He knew there was. You know, when you're doing lines and singing in the garage, you know, it's time to move on. But he, you know, even now you look at his hands. Those are the hands that put me through school. And so I have such respect and love for building things and taking care of the things you're giving my father, even now you break a handle. He said, don't go replace that. Give that to me. I'll fix it. We're gonna fix it. The hell with it. Well, no, we're not paying them again. We paid them once. That's it. Then, you know, he goes and fix it. I love that idea. And he kind of gave that to me. So look, it's like you, you put the time in. Yep. Even if you're doing this, this is, this is your product and you shape it and you give time to it. And you, and you, because you're creating it for the audience and for the people who are your consumers and, and keeping, you know, that, that was important to him. So he was, he was a great guy. He. That's how he founded. Built our family in an auto mechanic shop. My father. My mother's father was a restaurateur in New Orleans. Had a great Italian restaurant, Tony Angelo.

[Adam Carolla]

So you grew up with that?

[Unknown Speaker]

Oh, yeah, yeah. So those are my two worlds. Auto mechanic and an Italian restaurant. It was quite a world.

[Adam Carolla]

But, you know, I'm so jealous of the, like, pragmatic dad. Mom, when I say pragmatic, I mean this. Like. Okay, I don't want to make this about me, but you're gonna have, like. My grandmother was a counselor at the va. You know what I mean? There's nothing to use. You know what I mean? Like, when people go. My parents had a liquor store. I know, but it doesn't benefit me. I can't go there and eat for free.

[Unknown Speaker]

You could get an extra benefit if you. How do you work? Veteran, Right? How do work this?

[Adam Carolla]

Your car broke down in high school. Your dad could fix it. You wanted to go out to a cool Italian place, you could go, right?

[Unknown Speaker]

Well, and my grandfather was like. He'd have judges at one table, and, you know, Sinatra would come in, and he'd have the local mayor, and you.

[Adam Carolla]

Had a job if you needed it.

[Unknown Speaker]

Right. But you know what? My father would never let me work in the restaurant.

[Adam Carolla]

He wouldn't?

[Unknown Speaker]

No. He didn't like the people who worked there. Isn't that something?

[Adam Carolla]

Really?

[Unknown Speaker]

Yeah. You know, wait, at that time, you had waiters. That was their career. They were waiters, and after hours, you know, they were out gambling. They were, you know, they had a kind of seedy edge, but they dressed well, they came in, you know, and then they go drink all night.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[Unknown Speaker]

And he didn't want me around that element. That's what he said. I don't want you around that element. What do you mean? They're great people.

[Adam Carolla]

So I would assume that your dad's politics were sort of conservative because there's folks that have pragmatic jobs, literally nuts and bolts in this case, but who do work. They're not pieing the sky with the. Everyone needs a seat at the table and treated with dignity. And nobody's illegal. And no, it's go. Look, we. No.

[Unknown Speaker]

Oh, don't bring up the illegal with. My father wasn't. My father was a naturalized citizen and served in the Marines. And then, you know, so he earned his way into America. He's to the right of Pat Buchanan on immigration. But on politics in New Orleans, Adam, we're not a political people. You know, I go to dinner with Donna Brazeale and James Carville and Mary Madeleine. I mean, we go out together and we get along like you and Jimmy get along. You put. I mean, yeah, we can disagree with things, but not when we're at the table, not when we're spending time together.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, I agree with that.

[Unknown Speaker]

It's a different animal. And that's New Orleans. We have so much else that holds us together. We don't worry about politics.

[Adam Carolla]

Is it New Orleans? I've talked to people.

[Unknown Speaker]

You've been there.

[Adam Carolla]

I've been there more than once. But was grand marshal of a parade. Jimmy and I were. But which one?

[Unknown Speaker]

Do you remember which parade I was grand marshal of? Endymion. Was it Orpheus? Endymion? Bacchus.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, maybe we can find a picture of me and Jimmy in pirate outfits on a pirate ship float and maybe you'll know.

[Unknown Speaker]

It might have been Endymion, but with.

[Adam Carolla]

Your heritage, I didn't really sweat the details. Tommy Lasorda was supposed to be the grand marshal. He dropped out last minute it. And they called Jimmy and I in, but they didn't have time to change the face on the beads.

[Unknown Speaker]

So you were throwing Lasorda beads?

[Adam Carolla]

I was throwing beads with a Tommy Lasorda medallion.

[Unknown Speaker]

Oh, yeah, they have beads and then the doubloons. They have the doubloons with their faces on it.

[Adam Carolla]

I threw beads with the bloom that had the medallion on the bead was Tommy Lasorda.

[Unknown Speaker]

And you didn't get your own. There was not enough time. You were the last minute fill in.

[Adam Carolla]

They'd already printed up. They already made the time of the sword of beads.

[Unknown Speaker]

Takes time.

[Adam Carolla]

You need a little lead time.

[Unknown Speaker]

Yeah, it takes weeks. Yeah, they gotta do that.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. They didn't have that kind of time or maybe that kind of budget.

[Unknown Speaker]

But you had a good time and you got the pirate outfit, so what the hell.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, I think I had to give the outfit back. But I did have fun throwing beads at everybody because I marveled that the kids up on top of the A frame ladders with the basketball hoop and their face was the backboard, essentially. So I tried to bounce it off.

[Unknown Speaker]

Their forehead and see how many knots you could raise on foreheads. Which happens a lot, by the way.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, I. I played high school baseball and I loved throwing stuff. So I was on that pirate ship, just. I was going deep. Everyone was going deep, man. And I was going. I was going nuts. But then when they got the beads, it had Tommy, the sword, his face on it.

[Unknown Speaker]

So he takes the blame. Give him the Wrap.

[Adam Carolla]

The people were confused when they look at it, and they'd look up and. And I could hear him, like, yelling. But the boat was going by, so I'd go, I know. I don't know. You gotta. I don't have an answer for why Tommy Lasorda. And by the way, I don't even know if it said Tommy Lasorda. It just was Tommy Lasorda.

[Unknown Speaker]

Just the face of Lorda.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Unknown Speaker]

Yikes.

[Adam Carolla]

Which is hard to. It's hard to recognize, exactly.

[Unknown Speaker]

Well, look, this is a good alibi for you. That's why they. You know, there's an ordinance in New Orleans, you have to wear a mask. And the reason you wear a mask is if you get hurt from a bead flying or a doubloon going in somebody's eye, you can't identify the thrower. So it's a city ordinance that all the riders have to wear masks. You were grand marshal. You didn't have to. So having Lasorda on your merch is actually your swag. Clears your name.

[Adam Carolla]

Did they go down anywhere near where you were? They just go down streets and side streets and. And through neighborhoods and stuff.

[Unknown Speaker]

There's a route. There's a route.

[Adam Carolla]

There's a route, but people live on the route.

[Unknown Speaker]

Yeah, some people live there.

[Adam Carolla]

While I'm asking you, did you live.

[Unknown Speaker]

Anywhere near the route? No, I did not live on the route. No. I was in Metairie. Old Metairie. We're the next town over, five minutes from downtown.

[Adam Carolla]

And then you went to high school out there?

[Unknown Speaker]

High school there. Went to the Noka, where Harry Connick went, and the arts high school there. Ellis Marcellus taught there, but I went to Brother Martin, which is a Catholic boy school as well. And I split my time between the two eight classes and then hightailed it to the arts high school for the.

[Adam Carolla]

Afternoon, for the training.

[Unknown Speaker]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Singing, dancing, dancing. Instruments. No instruments, just singing and dancing. Shakespeare.

[Unknown Speaker]

Yeah, I did it all.

[Adam Carolla]

Wow. So starting at what age?

[Unknown Speaker]

14.

[Adam Carolla]

14. So at a young age, you're in the arts.

[Unknown Speaker]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

And then it's off to off Broadway.

[Unknown Speaker]

And look, I. I was also. I had a very weird version of the arts. My grandparents. I told you. My grandfather had a restaurant in New Orleans, my grandmother. And he had season tickets to the Sanger, which was a big, beautiful theater in New Orleans. Well, on a Saturday night, he was with his mistress, the restaurant. He wasn't coming with her. So guess who had to accompany his grandmother to see the shows? It was either me or my brother or My mother, one of the three of us got. So I saw Ethel Merman, Carol Channing, Rex Harrison, Richard Burton, Elizabeth Taylor. I saw all these people live in the flesh. So when you see that kind of talent, you think, oh, this is what Broadway. That's not what Broadway is. That is a. That is the. That was the fumes, the high points of the last three decades. Before I was born, I got to see the back end of the. The problem is what was next was nothing like that. So I was kind of deceived into what it was a bit of a.

[Adam Carolla]

Basic switch going into old school Broadway.

[Unknown Speaker]

I thought I was going to old school Broadway. The great songs about people who were in love. And then I didn't realize we were doing social causes and taking down, you know, Mao's revolution is the future. It was not an age. It's not about social change. It was about people in love. Every musical, every play is really, really Adam. About people in love or out of love or trying to find love or hating love. But that's the basic, the foundation. But that's not what Broadway is today. Today it's about self expression or, you know, my appetite, my sexual predilection. It's everything but what ties us together. The humanity that holds us together. And that's what I loved about the theater.

[Adam Carolla]

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[Dawson]

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[Adam Carolla]

Well, let's try to examine that, uh. Oh, arc.

[Unknown Speaker]

Hold on now here, doctor.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, I do.

[Unknown Speaker]

Hold on. I gotta get my couch.

[Adam Carolla]

You go, what's going on on these college campuses today? And you go, oh, I go, well, who's attracted to this profession? Who is teaching on college? College campuses? And I always say, tenure, professor. And tenure. That's as close to socialism as we have in this country. It really is. Because your dad had to go keep his shop open, and your grandpa had to keep his restaurant open, keep the food good. Everything is hustle, hustle, hustle. Tenure in college campus is really kind of close. It's their version of socialism in its sort of utopia form, which is everyone gets paid, never get fired. There's always a place to go.

[Unknown Speaker]

You're not accountable to your customer.

[Adam Carolla]

Doesn't matter on what level.

[Unknown Speaker]

It doesn't matter whether you can't fire you. No. Your kid comes out of free press.

[Adam Carolla]

Make a good living, everyone likes you, fine. And then you just get up and you talk. You don't do anything. You don't build anything. You don't fix anything. You just talk and you get paid, and they can't fire you. So then it attracts that group.

[Unknown Speaker]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

And when that group, when it comes time for them to talk, they're gonna say something very differently than what your dad would say, because your dad is attracted to a different business and comes from a different world. So after several decades of attracting those people, then the people they're talking to are gonna leave with a different message than the ones. And I would argue that Broadway probably underwent the same transformation.

[Unknown Speaker]

And here again, I studied with a woman named Stella Adler. Stella Adler trained Marlon Brando. She brought Brando into class one day. I was her last class. I had her for three years. And then she retired. I think I killed her.

[Adam Carolla]

I saw him that movie where he was screaming her name.

[Unknown Speaker]

Stella. Well, not wrong Stella, but yes. And he loved that Stella better. He loved Stella Adler better. But Stella trained us in old school where you were creating a character and you were doing it for the Audience again, you're serving the audience. You're serving the play, not serving yourself and your social agenda. That's not my job, not as an actor. So I. And that's where the theater has gone wrong. That's why they can't fill theaters. I mean, yeah, they bring Denzel Washington. They've got the biggest Broadway box office. Yeah, it's the biggest Broadway box office they've had. But not because of audience, because the ticket sales have quadrupled. You get $1,000 a pair of ass. The seat.

[Adam Carolla]

Really?

[Unknown Speaker]

Thousand dollars a seat? Who is worth that, Adam? Who is worth a grand?

[Adam Carolla]

You need one person to pay a grand. So that's interesting because you say, I saw the thing. You know, George Clooney broke $4 million in one week. But I thought, wow, what great attendance. But you're right, the tickets are five grand. Yeah, that's why he broke the record.

[Unknown Speaker]

Yeah, yeah. The seats are. I mean, the theater, it's the same number of seats. The only way you can make that kind of cash with the limited number of shows that you have today is if you're charging exorbitant fees, which they are.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, so then.

[Unknown Speaker]

Which makes it inaccessible to working class people like my parents who took me in the first place.

[Adam Carolla]

Broadway has then essentially followed the same trajectory as college campuses. If you think about it, they were different in the 50s, the 60s, and then they started to turn. And also there's an edict that changed, which is every performer, especially blowhard singers, think it's their job. Bruce Springsteen, to explain to the audience all their politics and who they should vote for and have to weave it into every conversation. The commencement addresses at the college. Now you're supposed to get up there and uplift the kids and give a message of hope and encouragement. And you have to bloviate about Trump or whatever, politically, whatever you're doing. So it has bled and infected every realm now.

[Unknown Speaker]

And we just wanna see the show. Just sing the song and shut. I saw Frank Sinatra 30 times in concert.

[Adam Carolla]

I love it. 30 times.

[Unknown Speaker]

30. Loved Frank Sinatra from the time I was a kid. Loved, loved him. Not once did he ever. Not one time did he ever say, I love Ronald Reagan. Right now, during campaign, he did campaign events for Reagan, but during concerts, he didn't go beat his audience. Why? He knew he had Democrats in the house. Why cut your audience in half?

[Adam Carolla]

30 times. What a magical youth you had. Between the free Italian food, the break.

[Unknown Speaker]

I had great granddaddy jobs. You had a great granddad, too. You know how important grandparents Are.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, I know, but he never spent any money. We never have any tickets to anything he did. I will say this about Laszlo Gorak. He was a member of the Writers Guild. He occasionally would get free tickets. And speaking of musicals, they were having a free screening for Writers Guild members of the movie the Wits, the black version with Diana Ross and Michael Jackson. Nipsey Russell.

[Unknown Speaker]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

And my grandfather said, we have free tickets to the Wiz.

[Unknown Speaker]

And to go to the.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. And the sad part is, it was a big deal, but it really would just be like you paying $3 and going to a matinee of a theater of a movie you wanted to see. I didn't really want to see the Wiz when I was 11, but I went anyway because it was free and it was like a big deal that he got free tickets to go see the Wiz.

[Unknown Speaker]

It's an event.

[Adam Carolla]

It's an event.

[Unknown Speaker]

But it cured you of ever wanting to go near musicals, Am I right?

[Adam Carolla]

Yes.

[Unknown Speaker]

I knew it. No, no.

[Adam Carolla]

I love musicals.

[Unknown Speaker]

That one will do it.

[Adam Carolla]

I love musicals.

[Unknown Speaker]

Which ones?

[Adam Carolla]

Let's see. I have seen. I like the old school.

[Unknown Speaker]

Me too.

[Adam Carolla]

Oklahoma ones. You know, basic nuts and bolts, you know, meat and potatoes kind of stuff. King and I. I've not seen the King and I. Oh, great musical.

[Unknown Speaker]

Beautiful musical.

[Adam Carolla]

I did see. I think I saw Miss Saigon in England and maybe even out here. And I've seen a few Broadway plays, mainly just because David Alan Grier was in one called Race. I think it was a Mamet play, actually.

[Unknown Speaker]

Yes, it was.

[Adam Carolla]

And I went. He gave me. I was gonna say free tickets.

[Unknown Speaker]

$3 tickets.

[Adam Carolla]

No, no. He gave me free tickets. And then I invited a friend of mine who lived in New York. I got tickets from David Alan Grier, and I went to the box office, and the guy's like, here's your ticket. And I'm like, oh, well, this guy stars in the production. There's only like three or four people. And he said he was gonna leave me tickets. And they said, well, it's only a ticket. And I said, okay. And this is a long time ago. I go, how much your tickets? And they go, $160.

[Unknown Speaker]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

And now I'm looking at the guy invited. And I'm like, this is a lot of money for 15 years ago, but I invited you. And I'm like, I just paid it.

[Unknown Speaker]

And so there's, you know, it is an event. You got to look at it as an event. But when you mentioned, you know, King and I, I saw Yul Brenner in King and I in person.

[Adam Carolla]

What was Sinatra like? When's the first time you saw Sinatra?

[Unknown Speaker]

I met Sinatra at my grandfather's restaurant when I was 18 years old.

[Adam Carolla]

What a childhood.

[Unknown Speaker]

I was a fanatic about Sinatra. Sinatra in concert, Adam. The lights would go on, the music would play. The room would stop when he walked out. I've never felt or seen that with any other performer. It was electric. That moment before he walked up to the mic and said anything. People literally held their breath. It was unbelievable. He was magical. He was a great actor. He was a great actor who sang. Sometimes the voice was, eh. He couldn't quite hit the notes anymore. Didn't matter. He was Frank Sinatra and he brought it all. He poured his heart into every lyric. He was great. Nobody like him.

[Adam Carolla]

30 times.

[Unknown Speaker]

You saw him 30 times.

[Adam Carolla]

And Yul Brenner and the King and I. Yeah.

[Unknown Speaker]

Greatest bow I ever saw. He would bow. He walked out. He had cancer at the time. I gave you a hell of a performance. He was incredible.

[Adam Carolla]

You ever see his psa?

[Unknown Speaker]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

Don't smoke one.

[Unknown Speaker]

Yeah. Remember that terrible dark boy that went dark fast. The lung cancer and I mean, basically.

[Adam Carolla]

Just going, hey, by the time you see this, I'm dead.

[Unknown Speaker]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

So don't smoke.

[Unknown Speaker]

Very grim. Yeah, yeah. But he. It was an incredible. He. He was. He was electric. Guy had. Had magnetism. Great in the theater. Incredible.

[Adam Carolla]

Ethel Merman.

[Unknown Speaker]

Ethel Merman I saw at the Blue Room, which was a little club in New Orleans. There's a Fontainebleau hotel. There's a Blue Room. And again, my grandmother had tickets. My grandfather. And I'm not going to see that loudmouth. So I got to hear Ethel Merman show. No mics necessary, Adam. She was the whole routine, the big. With the band and she was incredible.

[Adam Carolla]

She was in Mad, Mad, Mad World.

[Unknown Speaker]

Yes. And Airplane, remember?

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, I forgot she was an airplane.

[Unknown Speaker]

Remember? They walk into the psych ward and there's Ethel Merman. And the doctor goes, poor guy thinks he's Ethel Merman. And then she goes, everything's coming. They sedate her and she falls over. It's great.

[Adam Carolla]

Wow, what an interesting.

[Unknown Speaker]

So that's what's rattling around inside, Adam. It's all of that. When I see a show, when I want to see a show, that all comes with me. You want to bring classic entertainment. You want people to have a good time. You want families to do it, which I notice your comedy has moderated a bit. I think it's a little more family friendly than it was before.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, I did Two dry bar specials. And those have to be clean as a whistle. Super clean. And so I was having to go through and tidy up my act.

[Unknown Speaker]

Was that hard?

[Adam Carolla]

It's like anything. It was kind of hard at the beginning and then it became easier with repetition. And ultimately it wasn't for me. But because I. I've done lots of different formats and so I could wrap my head around it and figure it out. And I did. And they came out real good. And you guys should watch them. And I think I'm gonna do a third coming up pretty soon. No, it was a process with a little bit of technique. And the only thing I wanna say to people is it wasn't about cutting out the F word and the S word. It was about the premises. The premises were sort of adult premises. And I don't necessarily mean sexual, I just mean the thought was sort of adult, you know, and that's the part that's tough to overcome, particularly when you're used to that.

[Unknown Speaker]

I mean, telling those jokes and knowing the rhythm of the joke. I mean, it's a little like a song, a good joke, right?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. So you had to stop and kind of break it down and reevaluate, which is good. It's a good habit.

[Unknown Speaker]

Did you take it on the road a little bit before you did the Tri Bar special?

[Dawson]

You know, it was.

[Adam Carolla]

I had a funny experience, which is I would play, you know, I'd play some theater in Casper, Wyoming, you know, and, you know, I had 10 days before I was gonna shoot my dry bar special. And then I realized these people bought a ticket to see me and they didn't wanna hear 40 minutes of G rated stuff. Not that this stuff was bad, but that's not exactly what they bought their ticket for. And so I couldn't really give them 40 minutes of G rated Provo, Utah material. So I would try to break off 5 minutes and 10 minutes and sort of scatter it. But then you can't run it in order. And then the last place I was, which was the Ice House in Pasadena, this was like two days before shooting the dry bar special. It was a local crowd. It's not like I was getting paid a ton. It was in a theater and Tuesday night or something, and I just got up there and I said, look, I'm gonna level with you. I'm gonna do 40 minutes of clean material. And everyone started booing.

[Unknown Speaker]

What?

[Adam Carolla]

I know they start booing me. I mean, not booing me.

[Unknown Speaker]

But then I didn't want to hear, well, don't. Yeah, you don't want to open that one.

[Adam Carolla]

So then I was like, all right. So I did three minutes of something filthy dirty, and they started laughing. And then I just went into the 40 minutes, and they didn't know that I'd gone into the 40.

[Unknown Speaker]

It was the advertising that killed me.

[Adam Carolla]

It killed me. And then I ran. I know. And then I ran it. That's the only time I ran it. So that. That made it, you know, challenging, I think, but. But I had it. It was fine, and it was a good experience.

[Unknown Speaker]

You still enjoy it?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, I. I love the process. I like where I am. Think of something. Well, the challenge is you go, oh, I got an idea. Oh, I got a. And then you have to kind of beat it out a little bit and shape it and figure it out. And then sometimes you go, I got a good idea. But I know it's just not performing or landing or whatevering, and. Yeah, it's a very human process, I think.

[Unknown Speaker]

Well, this prepares you for a little of that. I mean, when ideas and concepts come to you, you just run them here. You do. You do try things out. I mean, I do. This is what we do on Ingram. I mean, I write that stuff out. People think that's improvised, or they ask about that.

[Adam Carolla]

You.

[Unknown Speaker]

We did this, you thing of Abbott and Costello knockoff, the who's on first shtick. But people thought it was real. It wasn't real. We scripted the whole. It was in the teleprompter.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, but you do. I mean, I watch as a, you know, audience member, but also as a professional, and I go, well, he's worked this stuff out, which is fine. And then. And he's executing it a little bit.

[Unknown Speaker]

A little bit. We. We work some of it out, and then I leave holes.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Unknown Speaker]

That's how we. So it's not all scripted?

[Adam Carolla]

No. You can tell when you land something. And then that begs a question. Are you going to start doing stand up? Have you been doing stand up?

[Unknown Speaker]

That's right.

[Adam Carolla]

Rough.

[Unknown Speaker]

That's a rough. That's rough. I could probably do it. I'd like to do it. Maybe I'd do an evening. If I can do songs and stories, I would probably do it.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, with all.

[Unknown Speaker]

It scares me, I gotta tell you.

[Adam Carolla]

With all your stage experience, you could do it.

[Unknown Speaker]

You think?

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, for sure. I know, I know you could. I would say the same to, like, Gutfeld, you know. I said Gutfeld, you know, I know you think you need visual aids and a slideshow and a sidekick and stuff like you really don't. You just have to just sort of do it.

[Unknown Speaker]

Yeah, the guts do it a lot.

[Adam Carolla]

It feels weird going out there.

[Unknown Speaker]

Well, you're alone.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, you're like a guy who goes out there with a guitar and, you know, does a funny song and then talks for 20 minutes and then does a funny song.

[Unknown Speaker]

Well, see, that I could do.

[Adam Carolla]

Right? But it's really just the huggy blanket of feeling the guitar. It's a crutch and it's. Yeah, I don't want to say crutch. I'll make it a huggy blanket. But the point is, what I would say to you is, get rid of the guitar. Go do it and you will.

[Unknown Speaker]

Okay.

[Adam Carolla]

That's what I want to say. I.

[Unknown Speaker]

All right, you heard it here, Adam.

[Adam Carolla]

Carolla, the prophet Arroyo Grande is the pod. I'm gonna be on it.

[Unknown Speaker]

You bet.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. So we're gonna do that. Available wherever you find finer podcasts.

[Unknown Speaker]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm gonna be tonight at Kimmel's club in Vegas doing shows. And then Friday, Saturday, two shows both nights, six and eight o' clock. Then Irvine after that, then Covina Laugh fact. Go to AdamKroll.com for all live shows. Dawson's gonna be in one of my favorite places, which is the end in Torrance. Rock and roll. Good barbecue, good fun. So go check out Dawson. That'll be this Sunday, right at that.

[Dawson]

That's right. Sunday with Darren Carter.

[Adam Carolla]

Stand up show Darren Carter, Jamie Lizzow, everybody, Laugh Factory and Punchline. And go to Jamie. L I S S o W is where you go. Alicia Krauss. You can check out her op ed on the Washington examiner till time. Next time's Adam Corolla saying, mahala, pick.

[Dawson]

Up your phone and leave us a voicemail. The phone number is 888-634-1744 and get your tickets to see the ace man. Get them right [e-mail].

[Adam Carolla]

Foreign.

[Alicia Krause]

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