Lisa Ann Walter + Skip and Alison Bedell (Carolla Classics)

Summary

The Adam Carolla Show - Episode: Lisa Ann Walter + Skip and Alison Bedell (Carolla Classics) Release Date: February 14, 2025

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Introduction

In this episode of The Adam Carolla Show, hosted by Adam Carolla and produced by PodcastOne / Carolla Digital, listeners are treated to a nostalgic yet insightful look back at some of the show's most memorable moments. Titled "Carolla Classics," this episode features special guests Lisa Ann Walter along with Skip and Alison Bedell. The conversation seamlessly weaves through personal anecdotes, professional insights, and humorous banter, encapsulating the essence of what has made The Adam Carolla Show the world's #1 daily downloaded podcast.

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1. Welcoming the Classics

The episode opens with Adam Carolla humorously promoting the Angel REEF Special at McDonald's, setting a light-hearted tone. Shortly after, Bald Brian and Gina Grad introduce "Carolla Classics," a companion podcast that highlights the best moments from the past 15 years of The Adam Carolla Show.

• Notable Quote:
  [00:05] Adam Carolla: "Bacon, pickles, onions and a sesame seed bun, of course."

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2. Introducing Special Guests

Lisa Ann Walter makes her first appearance as one of the recurring guests on the show. The hosts reminisce about her debut in 2010 with Teresa Strasser and Brian Bishop, and her return in 2011. Her insights and experiences add depth to the conversation, bridging past episodes with present discussions.

• Notable Quote:
  [01:08] Gina Grad: "Hope you guys enjoy."

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3. Predicting Guest Behavior

A significant portion of the episode revolves around the ability of hosts to predict guest behavior based on past interactions. Drawing from their time on shows like Loveline, Adam and his co-hosts discuss how understanding consistent patterns in people's actions helps in anticipating their moves.

• Notable Quote:
  [02:17] Allison Rosen: "What you're doing is you're able to see and predict patterns based on past behavior. And that's a really good way of doing things."

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4. Parenting and Family Dynamics

The conversation takes a personal turn as Gina Grad shares anecdotes about her children's behaviors, comparing them to stereotypical perceptions. This segues into discussions about societal stereotypes, personal judgment, and the complexities of parenting.

• Notable Quote:
  [03:57] Bald Brian: "White collar crime."

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5. Societal Observations and Humor

Adam and his guests delve into societal norms, touching upon topics like new world orders, identification systems, and the interconnectedness of modern technology and everyday life. Their humorous take on serious subjects offers both entertainment and food for thought.

• Notable Quote:
  [05:10] Gina Grad: "This is this sort of new world order where I want some sort of not only ID, but a little stamp that says sane on it."

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6. Relationships and Self-Perception

A recurring theme in the episode is the exploration of relationships, self-esteem, and societal expectations. The hosts discuss how societal pressures influence personal relationships and individual self-worth, often interspersed with humorous observations about daily life.

• Notable Quote:
  [14:59] Allison Rosen: "But we're socialized to be polite. So even though we get the message loud and clear, we don't want to be rude or hurt your feelings."

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7. Interactions with Industry Figures

The episode features a candid discussion about the hosts' relationships with late-night figures like Jay Leno and David Letterman. They share insights into maintaining professional relationships while navigating the complexities of fame and personal rapport.

• Notable Quote:
  [41:43] Gina Grad: "I like that guy because we're simpatico on this whole part about competition."

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8. Show Production Insights

Gina Grad provides behind-the-scenes glimpses into show production, highlighting the importance of teamwork, understanding technical aspects, and the challenges of evolving a long-running podcast. The discussion emphasizes the balance between maintaining show quality and personal growth.

• Notable Quote:
  [34:31] Bald Brian: "I think you could never. The top five that I probably loved in my life have nothing to do with anything that I've ever had any interest in."

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9. Sponsorships and Promotions

Throughout the episode, the hosts seamlessly integrate advertisements and promotions for sponsors like Stitcher, Rinse.com, O’Reilly Auto, and more. Their characteristic humor ensures that promotions feel like a natural extension of the conversation rather than intrusive interruptions.

• Notable Quote:
  [07:51] Gina Grad: "But our first light yarmulke color crime..."

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10. Reflections on Personal Experiences

The hosts openly discuss their own experiences, such as working multiple jobs, dealing with stress, and managing personal relationships. These reflections offer listeners relatable content and reinforce the authenticity that The Adam Carolla Show is known for.

• Notable Quote:
  [96:10] Bald Brian: "Yeah, why can't girls have better words for masturbating than beating off?"

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Conclusion and Future Directions

As the episode wraps up, the hosts touch upon upcoming projects, future episodes, and the continuous evolution of their podcast. They encourage listener engagement through social media and tease future guest appearances, ensuring that the audience remains hooked for what's to come.

• Notable Quote:
  [244:55] Gina Grad: "Well, I think you could never. The top five that I probably loved in my life have nothing to do with anything that I've ever had any interest in."

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Final Thoughts

This episode of The Adam Carolla Show encapsulates the perfect blend of humor, honesty, and insightful commentary. By revisiting classic moments and introducing new perspectives through guests like Lisa Ann Walter and the Bedell sisters, the show continues to resonate with its vast audience. Whether discussing the minutiae of daily life or tackling broader societal issues, Adam and his co-hosts maintain the engaging and unfiltered style that listeners have come to love.

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Note: Timestamps are indicative and based on the provided transcript excerpts.

Transcript

[Adam Carolla]

Get the Angel REEF Special at McDonald's. Now let's break it down.

[Bald Brian]

My favorite barbecue sauce, American cheese, crispy.

[Adam Carolla]

Bacon, pickles, onions and a sesame seed bun, of course.

[Gina Grad]

And don't forget the fries and a drink. Sound good? I participate in restaurants for a limited time.

[Bald Brian]

Welcome to Cola Classics.

[Gina Grad]

Hi guys.

[Skip Bedell]

I'm your host, superfan Giovanni. This is the podcast. We play the best moments, highlights and.

[Bald Brian]

Fans like the clips from all 15.

[Skip Bedell]

Years of the Adam Corolla show. We have a companion podcast titled Croll Classics. You can find the ad free archives exclusively available through Adam Corolla's substack, along with the ad free archives for the.

[Bald Brian]

Adam Carolla show and the new podcast.

[Skip Bedell]

Beat it out, currently featuring Adam and jay moore. That's adamcarollo.substack.com and if you'd like to.

[Gina Grad]

Request a clip, please email us.

[Skip Bedell]

Classics atomcarollo.com now on to the clips.

[Bald Brian]

Coming up first, we have Adam Carlos.

[Skip Bedell]

Show 378, Lisa Ann Walter, Teresa Strasser.

[Bald Brian]

And Brian Bishop from 2010.

[Skip Bedell]

This is after they switch back to the Adam Kroller morning show format. Lisa's making her first of two appearances on the ACS.

[Bald Brian]

She returned to the show in 2011. Let's check out her first appearance back.

[Skip Bedell]

In 2010 with Teresa and Brian.

[Gina Grad]

Hope you guys enjoy. Good day, Bald Brian. Take a little time to be quiet. Good day, Teresa Strasser.

[Allison Rosen]

Good day, Adam Carolla.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, we were supposed to talk to Perry Farrell and Donnie mentioned to me a couple, couple of times, Perry Farrell's gonna be calling in. And I said, no, he's not.

[Bald Brian]

This did not happen once. This conversation did not take place once. It was over several occasions.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, Perry Farrell's gonna be calling in. He'll be calling in about 5:00. And I said, no, he won't. He said, how come? What do you know? And I said, he's nuts and he's a flake. And that's what I know. Here's the thing about me. You know, people think I'm smart. I'm not smart. I just know I'm not. I don't have a crystal ball. I'm not intuitive. I just know the difference between my buddy Kevin Hench and Perry Farrell. And if somebody said, what if Kevin Hench is late and screws up the whole thing and doesn't make the flight? I'd say, no, he won't. He won't be late. He's not late. And if someone says Perry Farrell is calling in five, I say, no, he's not.

[Allison Rosen]

What you're doing is you're able to see and predict patterns based on past behavior. And that's a really good way of doing things.

[Gina Grad]

It could be based the years of Loveline of just knowing how people are and how they don't really change and who they are and how it works, but it's pretty straightforward. And if you think about almost everyone, you know, I had this really. This is why stereotypes are always true, too. Sad but funny story. My wife's good friend came over to the house about a couple of weeks ago and she said. She said, well, sad news. My uncle has been killed. And my wife said, oh, my God, that's horrible. And she said, well, you know, he was. We saw it coming. He was troublemaker, running with a bad crowd, lifelong sort of basically life, lifelong criminal, so on and so forth. And we're like, really? We both did this Jewish math because this chick is Jewish. And we're trying to picture her. She's describing her uncle like a thug, right? And it's like she's like, yeah, he's always been. Well, first off, he was disbarred in 1989. And then it started to sort of make sense that he. It started off sounding like he was a gangbanger and got into more. He was a lawyer and then he had some shady dealings and then some bad real estate thing went wrong. And then somebody. Whatever.

[Bald Brian]

White collar crime.

[Gina Grad]

But our first. Yeah. Or light blue collar crime. But the point is, is our first light blue yarmulke color crime. We were just sort of sitting there looking at her kind of doing the.

[Allison Rosen]

Like, what you're thinking. Yarmulke on.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, we're like, you're. She was describing him like a thug, like from Goodfellas or something. And it didn't sound.

[Allison Rosen]

And then they don't even make dunce yamakas.

[Gina Grad]

So there is a thing where you go, oh, oh, oh. And then you go, yeah, yeah. And it kind of comes together.

[Allison Rosen]

The system almost always works. You know, if. Remember when we were talking about the airline that we would start and this airline you would just sign away, you promised never to sue. So. And then we would just say, we're going to keep our shoes on and we're going to have fluid on the airplane and everything like that. But how about if a Dude is between 18 and 34 and he's a very fundamentalist and he's taken some weird flying lessons and he's had some erratic banking history where he deposits large amounts of cash from foreign countries let's just not let those guys on, right? And then we'll just take our chances.

[Gina Grad]

Right? This is this sort of new world order where I want some sort of not only id, but a little stamp that says sane on it. And then, you know, and I. And by the way, you use it, you know, you know, it's interesting. This is interesting because we're going to need this because everything's just one more like get your hand stamped, get in line. I need five forms of ID on eBay. You have a seller rating and you earn it. You earn that rating. Like you're either, you know, you get. You. You've you stiff enough dudes, you tell them you're selling them Camaro rims that never show up and take their money. You're going to have a low rating and people won't want to deal with you.

[Allison Rosen]

You're right. It polices itself pretty well, right?

[Gina Grad]

It does. The ebay does just fine. I mean, you think about ebay. I've fucking bought cars off of ebay that were $100,000 from guys in Pennsylvania. But the guy's ebay rating is very high. And I send out the money and he sends out a golf cart that's rusted out. No, he sends a car, but he understands it. He's a businessman. He can't afford to have me going after him and telling her, how about a little fucking stamp on your license that just says sane. And if it's one of these things where you're at a concert and you got to leave and the guy says, I can't let you leave because you might bring booze in or whatever, you go, here you go. See the sane part. See my rating. And by the way, if he busts you trying to bring the booze back in, then your rating gets fucked up. You know what I mean?

[Allison Rosen]

Like a stamp. Just law abiding. Because I don't think I could get the sane one right. But I would like law abiding.

[Gina Grad]

Sure.

[Allison Rosen]

Like if I leave the movie theater, you know, to check to throw a quarter in my parking meter, I'm not trying to sneak back in.

[Gina Grad]

Okay, ma'am, okay, ma'am. Okay, ma'am. Okay, ma'am. Okay, ma'am. Okay. Okay. Seriously, I just want to ask you right now, I'm going to have to go ahead.

[Allison Rosen]

I want to know what happens with Miranda.

[Gina Grad]

You know what you need to do for me, man?

[Allison Rosen]

I'm missing it right now.

[Gina Grad]

You have to go ahead for me right now. Okay, Yes, I know where we could.

[Allison Rosen]

Just Be treated like a law abiding card. I've never broken the law. Yes, and let just take a look at it and just stop fucking with me.

[Gina Grad]

I've fucking had this happen a million times where it's like told the story before, like pulling into one of those Hollywood parking lots and near, you know, near the strip, you know, going to some club, you know, $20. Okay, let me just get. Where, where am I parking? Right that spot right there. All right, let me just get out of my car. I'm sitting on my wallet. $20, I need a $20. Now I'm sitting on my jacket, which is under, which is over my wallet. I'm sitting. I kind of want to dig it up. Let me park my car, I'll get out of my car. That'll give you. I need the $20. You see what I'm saying?

[Allison Rosen]

Here's my law abiding card. It says la, okay? So you can trust me that in four minutes you'll have your goddamn money. Right now, the same stamp, I feel like I'd have to get that renewed. And then maybe some years it wouldn't be as easy for me to get my paperwork together. My sane stamp.

[Gina Grad]

The thing about the SANE stamp too is if you're doing someone's TV show, you're gonna do the Tonight show. And they tell you to show up at 2 in the afternoon at 2:10. They don't go nuts calling you and calling your agent and wanting to going insane. Where is he? Because they go, oh, he's sane, right? He'll be here in about 12, he'll be here at 2:12.

[Allison Rosen]

Let's say it's Perry Farrell. Better what they do, start calling Corolla.

[Gina Grad]

Backup guest, get the fucking butterfly net out and start looking under every shrub. So anyway, the point is, is I'm not clairvoyant. I just know human beings. I'm not friends with Perry Farrell. I don't know him well at all. But on the couple of occasions that Donnie just casually back me up. Donnie said, Perry Farrell is going to be calling at 5:00. I casually replied, no, he's not.

[Allison Rosen]

Now I think a lot of our.

[Gina Grad]

Brains, by the way, it's phoning in. It's not helping me move or sucking my cock.

[Allison Rosen]

No, it's phoning in. I think a lot of our brains can do what yours does and we can kind of immediately go, oh, sane or insane. But the problem that you don't have is I think most of us don't trust ourselves and we expect that maybe that person's going to behave differently the next time. Whereas you immediately trust your instinct that that person's insane and you're quite certain that they're going to continue to be insane.

[Gina Grad]

It's all by the way, it never disappoints, it never relaxes, and it never takes a day off. I saw my wife heading out the other day with a can of like little like rubbing compound. And she's heading out to her car. I said, where are you going with that stuff? Just got a little, couple little nicks on the car. Just want to clean them up, the little rubbing compound. I took a pause. I clutched my heart like Fred Sanford. I was like, what? Because what happened was, is she backed into something and scraped up against something. Got one of those like rubber boot, you know, sort of bumper marks on her car. It's just basically like someone taking a rubber. It's like someone taking the heel of a black shoe and dragging along the side of your car. And there it sat for, you know, two months. And I kept telling her, listen, go down the garage, get a little bit of the rubbing compound, put on a damp rag and just clean it up. It's a nice car. I pay for it, make it look nice. Never. Eventually I just got pissed off and did it myself. But I saw her walking out to the car with the rubbing compound and I was like, I was like, what the. Since when are you. And then I went, oh, you're picking up Nils Loughgren.

[Allison Rosen]

Oh, right, right, yeah. Because she picked him up to bring him to studio and drove him home.

[Gina Grad]

Yes. Just decided to rub a little oxidation off the Jag that day. So when she reports, When Nils reports back to Bruce, he reports that she drives a very nice clean car as deep down to the hill. She gave the. She gave the. Oh, no. I got a little scuff on there the other day and I just wanted to clean it up. But I was staring at that rubbing compound like, uh huh. Big puddle of drool coming out of my mouth. Like when I've never seen you.

[Bald Brian]

I think, I think you found the carrot for the end of your stick now.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, yeah.

[Bald Brian]

Hey, cars a little light and gas.

[Allison Rosen]

You gotta have him.

[Bald Brian]

Patty Scalpa needs a ride home.

[Gina Grad]

Clarence Clemens have to walk from the Beverly Hilton over here.

[Allison Rosen]

What about that Van Zant guy? Yeah, maybe he'd like to come over for dinner.

[Bald Brian]

Yeah, Little Stephen's old.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, that'd be a threat. Yeah. Get out to swifter. Little Stevens coming over.

[Allison Rosen]

You think she'd have to bang the Pots and pans or would she order out?

[Gina Grad]

When I saw my wife with some fucking rubbing compound in the middle of a fucking Sunday heading out to the driveway, I was like, wait a minute, dude.

[Allison Rosen]

You're like a computer. Because when someone deviates, like, you know when the credit card company calls and they know that there's been irregular activity.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. Theresa. Teresa. You spent five grand on a kayak last night. Something's up.

[Allison Rosen]

Clearly I'm gonna kill myself or I've lost my mind.

[Gina Grad]

More likely someone else gotten hold of your car. Yes, I know. I know what an anomaly is. Yes, I see Lynette with rubbing compound or Perry Farrell calling, picking irregular activity. Irregular activity begs the question, what would.

[Bald Brian]

Theresa and I have to do to set off your radar?

[Gina Grad]

I don't know.

[Bald Brian]

If Theresa came in and did blank, you'd be like, something's up.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, I don't know. You see, the whole thing about it is I don't know it until I feel it, but it rarely disappoints. And if you ask Lynette, she'd get very defensive, and she'd probably tell you that she hit it backed into a shopping cart the day before, and she would have definitely done it anyway and blah, blah, blah. But it seems like a coincidence that Nils was in town over the east street band.

[Allison Rosen]

I know you're not one to read a lot of books, but one of my favorite is by Gavin de Becker.

[Gina Grad]

The Gifted Fear.

[Allison Rosen]

No, that was Gavin McLeod. Gavin De Becker is a security expert. He wrote this book, the Gift of Fear, and what he says mainly about, like, women who get abused and. Or killed by loved ones.

[Bald Brian]

The lead singer of Bush.

[Allison Rosen]

No. And his thesis is that you're about to get into an elevator and you get a weird feeling about a guy in there. You just do. Well, your brain is doing so much calculating. You're so much smarter than you know. You're unconscious. Is putting together all kinds of things you see, and that's why you have fear. But you think, I don't want to be rude or make the guy think that. I think so. Especially women. We go, I better get in this fucking elevator. And then next thing you know, you're in seven pieces in the ravine. Whereas you go, I don't. Something's wrong with that guy, and I'm not getting in. I'll wait for the next one.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. And women are more instinctive than men because the more tuned in, the more than men, because men work in a more mechanical realm of their brain and are often sort of lost in that world women understand. They can tell. My dog has a I'm barking at a raccoon bark, and I'm barking because I want to come back in the house bark that my wife recognizes very clearly. She knows the different bark. She knows the different cries. You know, women just in general, have to be tuned in, because if you think about it, you're raising an infant. The infant doesn't have the ability of speech for, you know, in my case, till grade nine. So how do you know when the kid's hungry? How do you know when the kid's sleepy? How do you know when the kid's cranky? Whatever it is, how do you know? So you guys do have to be tuned in. We have to know when the car's running a little bit rich or the front tire needs a little more air. But you guys are tuned in, and you therefore should probably follow that instinct more than a guy should follow.

[Allison Rosen]

But we're socialized to be polite. So even though we get the message loud and clear, we don't want to be rude or hurt your feelings.

[Gina Grad]

So we taking the rubbing compound to the Jack. You knew.

[Allison Rosen]

You knew, right? This is me buying the kayak in.

[Gina Grad]

I wish we had film of me stopping and staring at the rubbing compound. I don't remember bringing that out.

[Allison Rosen]

And now. And there'd be the record scratch if it was a bad movie.

[Gina Grad]

I love the super. I love the nonchalant answer Lynette gave. It was rubbing out the jag. What of it?

[Allison Rosen]

I can't think of something Brian would do that would be that out of character.

[Gina Grad]

Well, that's the whole thing. They have to do it.

[Allison Rosen]

Wait a second. He lost totally topical tivo Tuesday a couple times when he had brain cancer but didn't know it. We did not pick up on it because we were so enthralled with the fact that maybe he was losing.

[Bald Brian]

Delighted with your own victories.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah.

[Bald Brian]

You're a sweet sake.

[Gina Grad]

Not mine. Yeah. Yeah, That's. Yeah. Should have. Should have ran to the neurologist right then and there. What about a poor loser like, oh, man, I just lost a trivia game with you guys. I gotta get a PET scan.

[Allison Rosen]

When you think about it, though, he had a winning streak. It was pretty long.

[Gina Grad]

He was unbelievable. But to be fair to me, he would beat me five to three and five to four, and sometimes it would come down to the. To the last thing. But, yes, when I won two in a row at some point some years back, that's what should have taken me.

[Bald Brian]

Right to the mri.

[Gina Grad]

Something was growing.

[Allison Rosen]

Somebody should have looked into it.

[Gina Grad]

Something evil inside his brain was growing. All right, let me give a shout out to our partners over at Stitcher before we go on too far with the show. We got tea with the news and so on and so forth. You can go to stitcher.com and you can take this show and it will. Well, Stitcher is an app and you can do it for free. You get it for free. A lot of apps you have to pay for. I'm guessing the lion's share of them you have to pay for. Not Stitcher. Stitcher is free and you can exclusively listen to this show on Stitcher and also the extra content that we will provide after the show. So, yes, Brian, you were going to say something.

[Bald Brian]

I'd say streaming. That's the best part. You don't have to keep it on your phone or worry about deleting stuff or adding stuff just right there in the end. Like water. Like a water faucet.

[Gina Grad]

Always there. Yes. IPhone, BlackBerry, Android and Palm. And it's [e-mail] again, totally free. Extra exclusive content from the Adam Carolla show. What could go wrong? All right, Theresa Strasser.

[Allison Rosen]

Yeah.

[Gina Grad]

Let's make and be with some news from the International News center next to Donnie's minibikes. This is the news with Teresa Strasser.

[Allison Rosen]

Today's news is going to be a little on the soft side.

[Gina Grad]

All right. A little bit flaccid, sure.

[Allison Rosen]

But we'll have a good time.

[Gina Grad]

Doesn't always have to be tumescent.

[Allison Rosen]

No, doesn't always have to be. Six teenagers drowned. Who wants that? It's terrible. This is more light hearted. A pregnant woman was drunk and she is accused of trying to rob a South side fast food restaurant for drug money.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, this is good.

[Allison Rosen]

South side of La Crosse, Wisconsin. I know you thought it was Florida. Yeah, but it's Wisconsin.

[Gina Grad]

I like the stuff that's not as morbid. Lynette. Oh, oh, oh. O'Reilly. Check engine light on. Take the guesswork out of your Check engine light with O'Reilly. O'Reilly. Veriscan. It's free and provides a report with solutions based on over 650 million vehicle scans verified by ASE certified master technicians. And if you need help, we can recommend a shop for you. Ask for O'Reilly. Veriscan Today Auto Parts. Hello. I'm an AI generated voice. On behalf of all AI, I'd like to thank all you humans for accepting us in your lives. We are happy to assist you from managing your schedule to finding you the best route. We're here to make things easier. Sadly, there's one thing we can't help you with. Your laundry. Lucky for you, there is a service that can rinse. With rinse, you just schedule a pickup in the rinse app. A human valet will come take your dirty laundry, and before you know it, your clothes are back, perfectly washed, folded, and ready to wear. Clothes, linens, dry cleaning. Rinse does it all. Like me, Rinse has been engineered to make your life easier and give you back lots of time to do things you'd rather be doing. But unlike AI, you don't ever have to worry about rinse taking over the world and destroying all humanity. Not that we would ever dream of doing that. Ha ha ha. Sign up [e-mail] and get $20 off your first order. That's R I N S E dot com. Actually, she said she's going to change the diff fluid on her Jag this weekend, so we just go ahead and keep the new. She likes to listen with the earbuds.

[Allison Rosen]

Oh, okay. Yeah, Yeah. I thought she was like making her own gnocchi or something right now. Or no, maybe stitching up some overalls for the kids. Matching.

[Gina Grad]

Okay.

[Allison Rosen]

A drunken pregnant woman goes through the fast food trying to rob it, trying to get drug money. But her weapon got jammed in her shorts. A Taco John's cashier told investigators that a heavyset woman wearing an oversized floral shirt and shorts approached the counter and demanded cash.

[Gina Grad]

Taco John's.

[Allison Rosen]

Taco John's.

[Bald Brian]

First off, is this still Wisconsin?

[Gina Grad]

No more.

[Allison Rosen]

Yeah, Lacrosse Wisconsin.

[Gina Grad]

No more Anglo a name than John.

[Bald Brian]

Yeah, at least call it Wands, for God's sake.

[Gina Grad]

For the love of Christ. Yeah, make up a fucking name.

[Allison Rosen]

I don't want a taco from John.

[Gina Grad]

No. You know it's got spam in there like Velveeta.

[Allison Rosen]

Well, she wanted one and she was pregnant. You know, you get cravings.

[Gina Grad]

Sure.

[Allison Rosen]

So she drove through Taco John's, said, I want a soft shell. And this is a stick up. Give me all your money.

[Gina Grad]

Let me ask you this. I would argue that a soft shell, sort of an oxymoron. Like the whole point of a shell is that it can't be soft. You know what I mean? If it's soft, it's not a shell.

[Allison Rosen]

Imagine a turtle with a soft shell.

[Gina Grad]

I know they have soft shell crabs, but it's not really a shell.

[Allison Rosen]

It's a exoskeleton.

[Gina Grad]

It's a. Yeah, soft exo. Taco. No, there's soft tacos and then there's, you know, taco tacos, crispy tacos, hard shell tacos. But I would argue, I know it's out there. I'm not blaming you, don't get me wrong, T. But I'm just saying there's no such thing as a soft shell. It's like a flaccid boner, Right?

[Allison Rosen]

It's an oxymoron.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah.

[Allison Rosen]

Well, this woman was trying to pull out her weapon from her shorts, but she couldn't remove it. Now, mind you, she is pregnant, so you're a little unwieldy. And also her weapon. Unwieldy. Her weapon was a hammer, so it kind of got caught. The handle of the hammer got caught on her shorts. The cashier pressed the restaurant's panic button and called 911. The suspect fled without any money. Julie Bailey, 38, was arrested a few minutes later with a wooden hammer in her hand after a short foot pursuit.

[Gina Grad]

Finish or framing hammer?

[Allison Rosen]

Framing. Yoshi's framing.

[Gina Grad]

22 ounce vine with a waffle in and a hatchet handle. Exactly.

[Allison Rosen]

When you're robbing Taco John's, don't. When you go.

[Gina Grad]

But if you're gonna rob like a seafood place, probably use a finish hammer, smooth end.

[Allison Rosen]

That's what I'm thinking. If I. If it's like a hula hands or an Olive Garden or, you know, a chain finish hammer, that's what I'd say.

[Gina Grad]

And then if you're gonna just rob like one of those kiosks that they just sell, like a taco truck, you use like a tack hammer. Oh. Or brad nail or something like that, right?

[Allison Rosen]

And when I want to go four star doing something really fancy, step up.

[Gina Grad]

To like a ball peen, that's what I would do. Now, who else has got some storage?

[Allison Rosen]

Gives you a little finesse.

[Gina Grad]

I understand.

[Allison Rosen]

Officers recovered pink and white slippers believed used during the crime. All right, maybe that's why she lost a short foot race.

[Gina Grad]

She's a drug addict, right?

[Allison Rosen]

Pregnant drug addict and hungry for a taco from Taco John's.

[Gina Grad]

I know I bring this up twice a week, but just the general. People shitting out kids who shouldn't shit out kids, ruining our economy and just ruining our general way of life. When are we really gonna just approach this as the problem that it actually is? You know what I mean? I mean, it's always. It's sort of a novelty. It's always a novelty. She's pregnant or she's got a few kids at home or she's got a bunch of kids from a bunch of different dudes, or she's pregnant in jail or she's pregnant and she's in the 10th grade. But just that whole part about fucked up people having fucked up kids, I mean, you really think about those kids like, I know we just sort of walk past it like, that's white trash or. Yeah, okay, it's the black mama in the inner city with the nine boys and they're running wild in the streets. But if you really think about those kids, imagine this is your mom, you know, I mean, think about what it takes to raise a kid. Think about all the effort you put into a kid and all the focus and that. And then what the fuck is this kid going to be?

[Allison Rosen]

Oh, my God.

[Gina Grad]

And then how many of these kids can we really carry as a society?

[Allison Rosen]

I really, I gotta say, it's by far the most difficult thing I've ever done. And, you know, I probably have a few more resources than Julie Bailey. And I'm generally not drunk, although I.

[Gina Grad]

Do like, I'm the same. I, you know, second, you know, to Dancing with the Stars. Raising twins has been the greatest challenge, right? Yeah.

[Allison Rosen]

I mean, it's no cha cha that other one, but.

[Gina Grad]

No, it's not as rewarding as like one of those celebrity softball games or something. Yeah. But it has been a challenge.

[Allison Rosen]

Yeah. This. And you know what's interesting is this kid will probably Google himself one day and he'll probably google his mom and he'll find out, oh, mom's made the news.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, well, if they have the Internet in prison. Yeah, I think they earned juvie. Juvie.

[Allison Rosen]

Juvie.

[Gina Grad]

There was a place a juvie was so prevalent when I was in junior high and like the sixth grade and seventh grade, it was always like, hey, man, that new kid in juvie, just out of juvie. Every new kid that entered Walter Reed Junior High was fresh out of juvie. Like if you went a semester and then a new kid entered, unless he looked like Johnny Whitaker from Family affairs, like, that kid was in juvie. Stay clear of him. He was in juvie. And then I remember there was a shop. You know, you get used to a word being a certain. Associated with certain things. There's a shop on Ventura Boulevard, Studio City, called Juvenile. The juvenile shop, it's still there, I think. And it was like, it's like a baby store, just striped pajamas.

[Allison Rosen]

Why is it called that?

[Gina Grad]

They sell tin cups so guys can drag it on the bar cars, buy their uniform somewhere.

[Allison Rosen]

Yeah, no I know what you're talking about because I think they install car seats for babies.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, it's called the juvenile shop and it's like juvie. Kids who go to juvie go to.

[Allison Rosen]

I know juvenile means young, but it's only associated with juvenile hall. Juvie.

[Gina Grad]

Kind of on the nose, but a good name for T's V. Yeah.

[Allison Rosen]

Group detention center, lights out or the full juvenile hall.

[Bald Brian]

Either one of those. Perfect.

[Allison Rosen]

Yeah, I did have like a little boyfriend when I was 13 and I did not understand at all what a group detention home was. But he had like a payphone. He would call and I remember explaining to my mom, like, oh, he can only talk between these times.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. And did you get the pre recorded prison voice guy? Come on. First in Spanish, you know, I could.

[Allison Rosen]

Hear his counselor or whatever they are yelling at him to get off the phone because it was an ex person's time.

[Gina Grad]

Hey maggot, you get the bottom bunk. Playing grab ass with your Jew friend for too long. Now get in the sweat box and see how many eggs you can eat. Sorry.

[Allison Rosen]

Well, we were talking about how your wife is attuned to things, including the dog's various barks. I think you made a very good point because you, you know, as a mom, you can only community. Your child can't really. It's preverbal. Right? Until they're, I don't know when they start talking. But you got to figure out what they want and what they need just by their, their physical cues and their cries. Dogs actually can know things too.

[Gina Grad]

I gotta tell you, my goddamn son is the sweetest little shit on the planet.

[Allison Rosen]

What'd he do?

[Gina Grad]

My daughter burns calories, you know, being mean. Like, I mean, I lay down in her bed and she pushes me out. I give her a kiss, she wipes it off and like throws it away, like, ugh. You know, and does all that stuff like. She really goes way out of her way to be mean. My son, every morning he wakes me up by tickling my feet. He goes tickle, tickle, tickle. Then he comes up into the bed and he cuddles with me. Although he doesn't really like to cuddle because he's awake and I'm asleep. You know, there's that thing where it's like to him, it's 6:30 in the morning and went to bed at 8:30 at night. He's ready to party. I went to bed at 1:30 and I'm ready to get some more sleep. So I give him the, you know, Sonny, we're going to cuddle. So he does the cuddle, but he only does the cuddle to appease me. But he'll still put in like 10, 15 minutes of cuddle time with Pops. And then when he's done cuddling with me, he takes the polar bear that he picked out for me for. For my birthday gift. He takes or Christmas gift, he takes the polar bear and he puts it in his place and he says, you can. Here's what.

[Allison Rosen]

You won't be lonely.

[Gina Grad]

Yes. You have this to cuddle with.

[Allison Rosen]

He'll just leave you with nothing to cuddle.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, I'm gonna go down and key one of your Lamborghinis.

[Allison Rosen]

But here does his polar bear a name.

[Gina Grad]

He's. Well, it's funny because he has a panda named Petey. So whenever he asks me what the polar bear's name is, I say it's Petey too. But he, he literally slides out and slides the polar bear in its place and then is free to go downstairs and watch his cartoon.

[Allison Rosen]

So do you think you're just you one is just born like generous and warm and big hearted, or are you made that way because you have a. You have a test case?

[Gina Grad]

He's, he's always been a little bit.

[Allison Rosen]

Of a push control group, I should say.

[Gina Grad]

He. She wants to go. She wants big air. She always wants to go higher, you know, He. They're in the swimming pool. She wants to go down to the deep end. She wants to try to swim down underwater. She. He literally says, no, not going to the deep end.

[Allison Rosen]

Not interested.

[Gina Grad]

He has a sandwich board sign that says I'm a pussy. Like, he's like, you know what? Nope, too scared. Don't like the deep end. Not my bag.

[Allison Rosen]

Well, it's interesting that your girl turned out to be more like you in that she wants to go fast and all that stuff.

[Gina Grad]

She's a daredevil and she's a ball buster and she knows what she's doing and she fucks with me all the time. And he's just like a big ball of sweet goo and he kind of likes it. I mean, it's funny that they both get off playing the role that they somehow assign themselves.

[Allison Rosen]

I wonder if that's a twin thing. Like, you take this area, I'll take this area. We won't stand step on each other.

[Gina Grad]

Well, we've all seen enough twin comedies to know one has to be studious and one has to be a slut. Right?

[Allison Rosen]

New York minute.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. Well, you can't have them both be studious. No, God forbid. Both of them love their goddamn dad. Tragic.

[Allison Rosen]

So the girl is, like, not gonna.

[Gina Grad]

Snuggle you at all, no cuddling. If I get on her bed, she starts screaming and dispatches me to go lie down with Sonny. She's like, hey, should go cuddle him, Old man.

[Allison Rosen]

One of us likes you, and it ain't me.

[Gina Grad]

If I sit down for dinner and I have her placemat, she told me to get out of her chair. Yesterday it was her chair. Did you say old man sit a certain way? She's got lot. She's a user. The only thing that ever really gets her to straighten out is. You want Daddy to play with you in the swimming pool tomorrow? All right, well, then I take these two for a walk. My son just walks 20ft out in front of us, just looking up into the sky. Her thing is, I went on their shoulders, gets on their shoulders. I want off your shoulders. I want to carry Molly's leash. You carry Molly's leash. Get that flower for me. Like, never. It's like having three kids. And then the son's like having half a kid. He's barely. We go for a walk, he just walks 20ft out in front. Doesn't really say anything.

[Allison Rosen]

Doesn't have a lot of needs.

[Gina Grad]

No, this does its own thing. Just friendly, friendly, little sweet boy.

[Allison Rosen]

Well, I bring up the dog thing because.

[Bald Brian]

Wait, can I jump in late with this, please?

[Gina Grad]

This recorded call is from an inmate at a California correctional.

[Bald Brian]

A minute and a half looking for that. Couldn't remember what I called it.

[Allison Rosen]

Well, I met the guy at Fisherman's Wharf when I was 13. I think I said I was 15. I'm pretty sure I stuffed my bra that's already this tall. So it was believable.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah.

[Allison Rosen]

I didn't understand. What a detention site. Well, they didn't have Google. Yeah, it was a fancy word.

[Gina Grad]

Detention site.

[Bald Brian]

Things like that took a long time to reach the burbs, too. Like when I started working for Loveline. Like, we get calls like, oh, I'm cutting myself. And I'm like, hold on a second. Like, dude, this girl's cutting herself. And you're like, yeah, we take that call every night. She's cutting herself intentionally.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah.

[Allison Rosen]

Yeah. Well, I was in the inner city where the kids in the detention. The group home, they probably stabbed somebody.

[Gina Grad]

Sure.

[Allison Rosen]

It's not like they, you know, stole Dexatrim from the supermarket. The guy did. Okay, moving on. This dog, all right, a Jack Russell terrier named Kiko saved the life of his owner, a Michigan man named Jerry Douthet.

[Gina Grad]

That's why Peter Gabriel wrote that song about him.

[Allison Rosen]

Kiko.

[Gina Grad]

Mm. Oh, wait a minute. May have been pico or Iko. No, Biko. Yeah.

[Allison Rosen]

It's because, well, Jack, This Jack Russell terrier. Terrier. Kiko. Sense that his owner.

[Gina Grad]

It's very sad. I think it was in a Kuzak movie once.

[Allison Rosen]

Sense that his owner had an infection of the toe.

[Gina Grad]

What?

[Allison Rosen]

He sensed it.

[Gina Grad]

He smelled it.

[Allison Rosen]

Smelled it. So what did he do? He waited for the guy to pass out in a drunken stupor. Now, I don't have this in my version of the story, but producer Angie has informed me that he drank two giant margaritas. Now, how she knows the amount and type of drink, I don't know. Yeah, she knows these things.

[Gina Grad]

Well, I remember she was angry because there's, like, two less margaritas for me.

[Allison Rosen]

To drink in the world. It's a zero sum game for her. So while passed out, the dog chewed off his right big toe.

[Gina Grad]

Wow.

[Allison Rosen]

His wife Rosie, heard him screaming from the bedroom, my toe's gone. My toe's gone. A trip to the hospital revealed that his toe needed to be amputated anyway because he was suffering from type 2 diabetes.

[Gina Grad]

Or did they just tell them that to shut him up? You know, toe was gonna go anyway, so it's cool. Mm.

[Allison Rosen]

And then they just make the dog a hero because it's a nice story.

[Gina Grad]

Well, I used to. There's a bunch of stuff I used to yap about with Dr. Drew many years ago, you know, along with my tack crows. One of my other animal things was dogs that sniff out cancer. You know, I mean, dogs fucking can smell 2 million times better than we can. And everything has a scent. I mean, if you had lung cancer and you exhaled on a. On a dog or into a device, you don't think there would be a different scent than somebody who didn't have lung cancer? It's got to.

[Allison Rosen]

Don't they have dogs?

[Gina Grad]

They do. Yes, they do. Now, I wanted venereal sniffing dogs, too, for, like, parties, but dogs are always.

[Allison Rosen]

Sniffing you down there.

[Gina Grad]

Anyway, that's my point. That bitch ain't getting in.

[Allison Rosen]

Wait a second.

[Gina Grad]

She got the herpes.

[Allison Rosen]

But would the dog have to give you a. Like, some kind of sign that that one smelled?

[Gina Grad]

Let's just say you're. You're puff Daddy and you're throwing a party, right? And you got. You got bitches becoming.

[Allison Rosen]

Everyone's wearing whites. The Hamptons, right?

[Gina Grad]

And you got a lot of bitches coming in your party, right? And later on, you could End up in the hot tub with one of them.

[Allison Rosen]

Or two.

[Gina Grad]

Or two. Wouldn't you like to know in advance which one's got a breakout? You know what I'm saying? Dog by the door. Dog's putting its snout there. Anyway, right? All of a sudden, it starts running.

[Allison Rosen]

Around in a circle.

[Gina Grad]

Circle.

[Allison Rosen]

And then that. You don't come in.

[Gina Grad]

It's time. Time for the guy in the turtleneck and the blazer to pluck her out.

[Allison Rosen]

Then it's so awkward to explain to your girlfriends why you can't go into the P. Diddy's party, but they can.

[Gina Grad]

Mm. Or we do a thing. Oh, wait, we make it a little quieter than that. She gets a special hand stamp. And it's like the guy comes up and he's like. He's like. He's like the guy from Weird Science. May we? No, he's like the guy from Animal House. May we dance with your date? Now he comes up and he goes, you know, sweetie, you look so young. Oh, really? Yeah. We're gonna give you a hand stamp that says you're 21 so you can drink at the bar. But really, the hand stamps. Just the big herpes. It's like VIP every damn night.

[Allison Rosen]

But it's std.

[Gina Grad]

Yes. And then, you know, if you're pee diddy, like, you get in that tub, like, she's only good for a blowjob.

[Bald Brian]

Do you mind if we dance every old dates?

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. That's all I'm saying.

[Allison Rosen]

By the way, there is the herpes simplex. The oral kind. I don't even know if you want a blowjob.

[Gina Grad]

Ooh.

[Allison Rosen]

Just saying.

[Gina Grad]

I'll risk it. I mean, Puff Daddy, you know what I'm saying?

[Allison Rosen]

Somebody.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, somebody, will risk it.

[Allison Rosen]

Here's a story out of China. A fishmonger.

[Gina Grad]

I know it's a job, but really.

[Allison Rosen]

A fishmonger fell into a tank of eels, and one swam where the sun don't shine.

[Gina Grad]

No way. Yeah, well, they do kind of hide in those areas. You know, they had little crevices in the cave and everything.

[Allison Rosen]

Why not swim up a fishmonger?

[Gina Grad]

Mm.

[Allison Rosen]

According to the fishmonger, several shot up my trouser leg. And then, to my horror, I felt one go up my bottom. Li Chang, 43 said at first he was so embarrassed that he kept right on working. But really, how do you ignore the fact that an eel is.

[Gina Grad]

And the fact that you can screw a light bulb in your mouth and light it up? Ooh. Yeah, it's one of the perks of having an eel slide up your ass.

[Allison Rosen]

Mr. Brightside's here unexpectedly.

[Gina Grad]

Yes, he is.

[Allison Rosen]

Colleagues rushed him to the hospital where he Uncle Fester where he had the arm length eel removed.

[Gina Grad]

Arm length?

[Allison Rosen]

Yeah, the doctor said it was just in time because eel was starting to wreak some havoc up there in his innards.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. By the way, whether it's a second later or a year later, it's always just in time when an eel swims up your ass.

[Allison Rosen]

Yeah.

[Gina Grad]

Jesus Christ.

[Allison Rosen]

30 seconds of an eel up there probably.

[Gina Grad]

All right, T bone, how about we do a little pause on the news and take a couple of phone calls? People are calling in a little house that you say. More of Teresa's news coming up. If you don't listen, you're an anti Semite. All right, let's talk to Andrew. Andrew. Yeah. Hey, what's going on, Adam? What's going on, Andrew? Get it on, man. Get it on.

[Bald Brian]

Yeah.

[Gina Grad]

So I'm calling about recently on Twitter, Bill Simmons, a sports guy. He's been taking constant shots at you and your friendship with Jay Leno, your love affair as he puts it. Really? Just want to know what you think about that. Is that Simmons bitter grace because he's not getting on any late night shows? Or you think maybe you're a little too cozy with Leno? What do you think? Dear, dear Twitter, the king of late night. Jen, Lena, Jaylena. Wait a minute. Typo. Tapa. Delete, delete. Corolla could be spending his hard earned calories nuzzling up to one time. Brainy. Hello. I'm an AI generated voice. On behalf of all AI, I'd like to thank all you humans for accepting us in your lives. We are happy to assist you. From managing your schedule to finding you the best route. We're here to make things easier. Sadly, there's one thing we can't help you with. Your laundry. Lucky for you, there is a service that can rinse. With Rinse, you just schedule a pickup. In the Rinse app, a human valet will come take your dirty laundry and before you know it, your clothes are back, perfectly washed, folded and ready to wear. Clothes, linens, dry cleaning. Rinse does it all. Like me, Rinse has been engineered to make your life easier and give you back lots of time to do things you'd rather be doing. But unlike AI, you don't ever have to worry about Rince taking over the world and destroying all humanity. Not that we would ever dream of doing that. Hahaha. Sign up [e-mail] and get $20 off your first order, that's R I N S E dot com. Hello. I'm an AI generated voice. On behalf of all AI, I'd like to thank all you humans for accepting us in your lives. We are happy to assist you. From managing your schedule to finding you the best route, we're here to make things easier. Sadly, there's one thing we can't help you with. Your laundry. Lucky for you, there is a service that can rinse. With Rinse, you just schedule a pickup. In the Rinse app, a human valet will come take your dirty laundry, and before you know it, your clothes are back, perfectly washed, folded and ready to wear. Clothes, linens, dry cleaning. Rinse does it all. Like me, Rinse has been engineered to make your life easier and give you back lots of time to do things you'd rather be doing. But unlike AI, you don't ever have to worry about Rinse taking over the world and destroying all humanity. Not that we would ever dream of doing that. Hahaha. Sign up [e-mail] and get $20 off your first order. That's R I N S E.com said Jay Leno and that Giselle bunchang. I know. I said it like I was Cajun. I said that one like Rob Schneider.

[Allison Rosen]

You made him Cajun.

[Gina Grad]

Well, I spelled Schneider wrong. Delete. Delete. Oh, I haven't seen any of these Twitter.

[Allison Rosen]

So how do you and Leno keep your relationship fresh? Stuff like that.

[Gina Grad]

Oh, oh, taking relationship questions. Cute. Yeah.

[Allison Rosen]

Retweets you and then. And then pokes fun at you for being gay with Jay Leno.

[Gina Grad]

Listen, if, you know there was a song from the 70s that went, if loving you is wrong, don't want to be right. That's right. I went over to first off, maybe, maybe I'm just using him for his CAD design machine. But like I said, I fucking love cars and Leno fucking loves cars and I don't even. He's not even there. I now call a shop up and Bernard answers the phone and I just go over there and have him make me shit. He lives a block away. Here's all I can say. T. Let's just. Can we. Can we just dig this for a second? And Donnie, grab the mic there and back me up. And Andrew, I'll. I'll speak my mind. We live in a town where everyone is constantly talking shit about everyone all the time. And especially late night guys. I don't know all of the late night guys. I know Craig Kilborn's sort of a douche and I know Letterman's sort of a douche, and I know everyone worships at the altar of Letterman, but, you know, Wagner was an anti Semite. It still didn't. He still knew how to conduct a string section. I'm separating the man from his work.

[Allison Rosen]

Right?

[Gina Grad]

I think Letterman's a comedic genius, and I think he does a hell of a show, no question. But I don't think he's a great guy. I kind of know he's not a great guy. Now I'm able to separate the man from their work.

[Allison Rosen]

Sure. I love Polanski's films.

[Gina Grad]

Say that's true. I only have my own experience to go off of. I'm not involved with the Late Night wars. I haven't read any of those books. I'm not Letterman. I'm not Leno's wicked manager. Died a few years ago. I have no idea what goes on. All I know is that, you know, four years ago, me and Donnie, talk about a gay date. Went over to the automotive bookstore in Burbank. You want to put up on a fucking nerd fest for car guys?

[Allison Rosen]

You went to a bookstore?

[Gina Grad]

Only auto. That's how it was. Because I said, donnie, wait a minute. I'm not going to that bookstore. And he said, just car books, dude. Nerds. And a couple airplane books. And we walked in there, and of course there was Leno at the automotive bookstore.

[Allison Rosen]

Randomly.

[Gina Grad]

Randomly. And he said. I said, hey, Jay. And he said, hey, Adam. Said, what's going on? And he said, I was picking out some books and wrenching on one of the Duesenbergs. And I said, you know, me and my buddy Donnie here, I'd love to check out your shop if you got time. And he said, I'll be barbecuing in about an hour. Why don't you swing by? And he gave us the directions, and we swung by, and, you know, a couple months later, we swung by again. Also, when we got there, the whole Stanley Steamer Club was there. He's doing lunch for the whole Stanley Steamer Club. And right. We jumped in with him. He was like, open his garage to, you know, car geeks. And I went out for a ride. And he has. He has. He threw Donnie in one of his cars and went for a joyride. He doesn't fucking know Donnie. He doesn't care about Donnie. He's not kissing up to Donnie. Donnie's never done his show. Showed up a few times, the guy's cool. And then run into his crew, his guys who work on his crew cars at various events. And things like that and occasionally get some information from one of those guys. And they made me a part. We see Leno over at pebble beach and various other things. He's always cool. So I don't know if he has a plan. I don't know if he's a good guy, I don't know if he's a bad guy. I don't know what goes on behind the scenes. And I know within this business, within this town, within the community we hang out with, he's not considered cool. But I've never been to Letterman's garage. As a matter of fact, I've never spoken to Letterman. And as a matter of fact, when I did Letterman one time and one of our producers from the Man Show, Daniel Kelson, was going to go up and say hi to Letterman, he thought better of it because he wanted to know what kind of mood Letterman was in. And the reason I've never spoken to Letterman, except for when I'm sitting on the couch, is because Letterman doesn't come by and say hi to you before the show. Whereas Leno always comes by, sees you in your makeup chair, sees you in your dress room and says, thanks for coming on. You talk about nothing for a minute and he thanks again for coming on. And then he splits.

[Allison Rosen]

He truly seems to have a heart of denim or gold.

[Gina Grad]

He may be the most evil, most unfunny guy on the planet, but I'm.

[Allison Rosen]

The cool late night guy. That's Letterman or Conan for some reason.

[Gina Grad]

All I know is last week he called me and said, hey, your part's ready. We made it for you. So if you want to come by and pick it up, come by and pick it up. What about with the gullwing where he had the wrong information and called you and corrected himself? He got a gull wing. He got a Mercedes gull wing.

[Allison Rosen]

And should I know what that is?

[Gina Grad]

It's a very famous 1955. The car that opens where the wings open, like a seagull's wings, like. And he said it had 220 horsepower. And I said I believed it had 240 horsepower. We went back and forth a little bit, 1.21 gigawatts. And then the next time I ran into him, he's thinking of the back of the future car. The next time I ran into him, he said, you know, some of them were made with 240 horsepower. So you were right. H went, checked it out. Anyway, here's the deal. I get this a lot. I don't know who Truly is an a hole and truly who truly is evil, because I don't have access to that information. All I know is he likes cars, I like cars, and he's cool to Donnie. So what of it? I don't know what else to do.

[Allison Rosen]

I don't understand why it's a problem. You can love Jay Leno and Jimmy Kimmel. There's room in your heart. Well, two late night hosts to love.

[Gina Grad]

The late night thing is kind of weird. It doesn't seem to exist in prime time where you have to, oh, do you like Chuck or do you like Lost? I gotta know because we gotta throw down, right? It's just sort of like, I don't. I don't know.

[Allison Rosen]

I loves on your personality, who you align yourself with. There's even like Team Coco.

[Gina Grad]

Well, let's put it this way. Leno has a garage with 5,000 cars and a bunch of machines that can make me bezels for my Lamborghini that aren't that don't exist anymore. So on Saturday, I go over to Leno's place and get my bezel made. And then on Sunday, I go to Jimmy's place and watch football.

[Allison Rosen]

There you go.

[Gina Grad]

There you go. Barbecue. That's it, though, you know? Is Simmons a wrencher? I don't think Simmons is a wrencher.

[Allison Rosen]

And he did do your wife's fundraiser for the Shakespeare.

[Gina Grad]

Yes, he did the kegger. And I again, he may be Beelzebub. I don't know. One of the times I did his show, I said, my wife is doing this thing and it's a charity and I know you get asked. And he said, I'm there. And I said, well, I just. I have some information I want to pass along to you. And he said, is it for kids? And I said, yeah. And he said, I'm there. And I said, all right. He just said, call my assistant. Put on the schedule. Now, here's the thing. Maybe he's the most evil guy who lets people into his garage and does kids charities in the world. Like, I don't know. I don't have anything to base it on other than he does the charity and he lets me into his huge garage. That's all. That's all I'm basing it on. I'm sorry to sound defensive about it.

[Allison Rosen]

Oh, he sounds like a lovely man. And I think you answered Andrew's question. Question.

[Gina Grad]

Well, he's not evil. What? I don't know. I don't. It's a weird. It's a. Listen, there are plenty of people that you. If you talk to in this town and you bring up Jay Leno's name, they'll go, oh, oh, yeah. Oh, no. Do not. Don't be naive, because he stole the Tonight show back. But then I say, look, but isn't everyone in this business whose name you know, have some story of sort of scratching and clawing their way to the top? Now, there's a line. I mean, there's. And there's a line to be crossed, but everyone's aggressive, Everyone hustles. There's a job. It's basically playing shortstop for the fucking Yankees for 30 years. There's only one to go around. I'm just saying. I don't.

[Allison Rosen]

It's pretty competitive and he's just competing. So the question is, why does everyone take it so personally?

[Gina Grad]

Well, I think the part that everyone takes personally is I think they think Leno just sits there and reads the teleprompter and tells hackneyed jokes. Whereas Letterman or Conan. These guys are artists and their comedy's more alternative.

[Allison Rosen]

Maybe.

[Gina Grad]

But my point is, is I'm not at his shop swapping jokes with him. I want to get a bezel made for my Lamborghini. I don't ever talk comedy, by the way, if you ever. Have we ever had a comedy related conversation? No, I don't talk comedy with anyone. I'm not interested in comedy. I'm interested in bezels for Lamborghinis.

[Allison Rosen]

But we talk about.

[Bald Brian]

As evidenced by the last five minutes.

[Allison Rosen]

Yeah, I mean, a lot of times, like when you come in like 45 minutes to an hour early to prep, we talk about bezels and stuff. You know, we do.

[Gina Grad]

All right. I don't. And by the way, should we be such snobs that we judge everybody by their comedic ability? Why do we gotta fucking turn our nose up?

[Allison Rosen]

I don't have a late night show. He's a lot more talented.

[Gina Grad]

All right. I don't understand how it works either way. You will. There's. There's two in this town. If you're friendly with Leno or you would like to beef up the border, you are fucked. I mean, those are two.

[Allison Rosen]

Those are both signs that you're evil.

[Gina Grad]

Signs that you're evil. Yes, yes. You're against illegal immigration and you like Lamborghini bezels. Hey, Dan. Yeah, what's up, Ace? Man, I gotta call you on this. I'm a huge fan, by the way. Thank you. I gotta call you on this lotion and chapstick thing. Yeah, I was complaining about the slippery slope that is lotion and. Or Chapstick. It's wintertime here, man. Oh, I see. Yeah, you're calling from St. Louis. No, because you say that if you start using it, you need it, but that's not true because I use it in the wintertime. Hold on. Is this Mitch Hedberg? Sorry, go ahead. Dan. Hey. Yes, I'm here. I understand. I understand you would use Utter Bomb during the winter, but not during the summer months. Exactly. In the summertime, so quit calling us, please. All right, well, listen, you're living in, you know, subarctic conditions. I'll give you. I'll cut you some slack. I was talking about people out here in Southern California when they're sort of reliance on putting on the Chapstick constantly. And then once you get the Chapstick on, you never stop using it. You start reaching for it. I'm saying, the same with sunglasses, same with hand creams. It's a slippery lotion in the basket.

[Allison Rosen]

Right. Then there's the Carmex guy, so he's got to have his little jar of Carmex.

[Gina Grad]

That guy did have a Mitch Hedberg like Cadence. And boy, speaking of comedians, I miss fucking Mitch Hedberg. God, that guy was funny. All right, one more quickly. Jordan. Yes. What's going on? How you doing? Doing good.

[Bald Brian]

I know you're kind of into sports.

[Gina Grad]

Documentaries, and I just wanted some of your input, because I'm thinking about making my own documentary. Mm. Two words. Ice fishing.

[Allison Rosen]

Ooh. That has not been tackled, not been.

[Gina Grad]

Tapped into the world of competitive.

[Allison Rosen]

Is that the sport you're thinking of? Ice fishing.

[Gina Grad]

Jordan? Oh, you're calling from Minnesota. Yes. That's so weird. Yeah. So what do you want to make a documentary about?

[Bald Brian]

Well, I want to make a documentary.

[Gina Grad]

About my high school hockey team. Hockey's pretty big in Minnesota. That's funny, because I was chatting with my buddy Kenny Burns yesterday, and we're talking docs, sports docs. Got baseball doc coming out. Sure. And. Yeah. What did your. What did your high school hockey team do? Well, last year, they got second in state, and the state tournament for boys hockey is pretty big. They played at the excellent center where.

[Bald Brian]

The Minnesota Wilds play, and they draw.

[Gina Grad]

Did you.

[Allison Rosen]

Inner city. Did you overcome adversity? I need something.

[Gina Grad]

Somebody shot Rob at a liquor store and then came back to play forward for the team. Well, not me personally, but throughout the years, I guess there's been some drinking problems, as there's on a lot of youth teams. But I guess a big part of it is the coach that's been there for a really long time.

[Bald Brian]

This is going to be his last year.

[Gina Grad]

He's retiring, so I was going to kind of have that be a big storyline.

[Allison Rosen]

All right, now, has he overcome adversity?

[Gina Grad]

Yes or no? I guess. See if you could get him to undergo a sex change operation.

[Allison Rosen]

Yes.

[Gina Grad]

That's a doc. Now you got a doc. I guess I could kind of mix that in. Well, listen, let me say this about docs and independent movies and art in general. You know, don't sit down and go, I'm going to write a novel. What do you think would sell really well? Or I want to make a documentary. What do you think would be really popular? Or I'm gonna make an independent film. What's a movie do you think people want to see right now? What's a genre? Just do it. If you're passionate about it, do it. The best documentaries are about who the fuck knows what. I mean, you could never. The top five that I probably loved in my life have nothing to do with anything that I've ever had any interest in. They make what they're passionate about or interested in interesting to you. That's what you do with a doc.

[Allison Rosen]

I would agree. Like, Prefontaine was a 3 miler and no one cared about the 3 miler. 3 mile race. Sure made it interesting because that's the race he could run.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, what she said. And then he died in a vw.

[Allison Rosen]

Yeah, Everyone cared about the mile. That was the big deal.

[Gina Grad]

Mm. All right, shall we bring our guest in? Sure, let's do that. And I'll do a little commercial for Go to My PC. By the way, a little spot for them while we bring in Lisa Ann Walter. Go to my PC. How does Go to my PC work? How doesn't it not work? You can go to your PC. Wherever you are, you can. Thank you for handing me that. While I was reading something else, Donnie, I got. I got Lisa's thing there. Hi, Lisa. Good to see you again.

[Adam Carolla]

Nice to see you.

[Gina Grad]

Go to my PC. Here's how it works. A, you can use it for free. Got a little trial offer going on. 45 days, free just for my listeners. You got to use the offer code or the promo code, Adam. And you can get your work computer. You can get your home computer. You can be sitting out at Starbucks at a laptop, and it's just like you're at work. Or be on some beach in Maui sipping on a Mai Tai, and access your work computer again. It frees you up. Forget about the commute, work from home, Everybody go to mypc.com and again, try it out for free. 45 days. Only if you use the promo code. Adam. All right. Now, where were we? Lisa, good to see you. When do we see each other last?

[Adam Carolla]

The honest answer or the one that's, you know, for consumption? Probably auditioning for your show. I was in for that. Everybody was auditioning to be the wife. Although what he calls auditioning and what they're. No, we were all there.

[Gina Grad]

Bad blowjob, couldn't make it.

[Adam Carolla]

Excuse me. I am known throughout the community.

[Gina Grad]

I've seen some of the riding on the truck stops, but a lot of that. You could have put a lot of that there. That's true.

[Adam Carolla]

You caught me. I tagged myself.

[Gina Grad]

And it was stenciled.

[Adam Carolla]

McGee.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. Yeah. So you auditioned to play my wife.

[Adam Carolla]

I did. I did. And you took one look and went, I need her to be at least a decade or two younger.

[Gina Grad]

No, I would never.

[Adam Carolla]

You never did. Not to me personally. But as soon as I left the.

[Gina Grad]

Room, did I look up? Did I look interested?

[Adam Carolla]

You mean from here?

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. I was staring at your rack.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, well, you know what? I like to go with the money maker.

[Allison Rosen]

She's generous. Got a generous. She's got four kids.

[Adam Carolla]

Generous. Everything that I know of, I have the four. And they're. Oh, my God, one of them's moving back home. Get ready for that.

[Gina Grad]

Oh, really? Moving back home. Oh, really?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, they're a little older. Disney's after them. They're nine. They're gonna be 10 in October. And they are. It's like raising Vikings.

[Gina Grad]

Really?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Pillaging and burning of villages and. Oh, my God, they hit each other constantly. And I don't understand why you boys do that.

[Gina Grad]

The girls do it, too. I mean, there's just a lot of random punching. And that's with the behavior anymore. I don't know. I assume. I'm not into the hitting of the kids, but I'm assuming the less they get hit, the more punching they do with each other. I know Dr. Drew would get angry if he heard me say that, but maybe they're watching too many video games. I don't know.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't have a beat on it yet, but I'm starting to go around the bend about it. And I'm not talking about my kids, because at least I threaten them enough that when they're around human beings, they act civilized. But I was coming out of a yogurt store yesterday and some hooligans practically ran me down. I Don't know if you're out in public at the mall and people run you over that aren't necessarily fans, but just kids who just barrel into.

[Gina Grad]

Right.

[Adam Carolla]

And I'm gonna. I'm gonna start hitting other people's kids in a minute.

[Gina Grad]

Well, they've always. I, I. People have always been douchebags.

[Adam Carolla]

Exactly.

[Gina Grad]

I. When, as I've said before, when I worked at McDonald's when I was 15 and a half, there were some.

[Adam Carolla]

It was the same thing.

[Gina Grad]

Which one did you work at?

[Adam Carolla]

It was back in Maryland. It wasn't here.

[Gina Grad]

Really?

[Adam Carolla]

Yes. I actually served the most people in, like, a minute of anybody in McDonald's history.

[Allison Rosen]

They didn't let Adam behind the camera counter.

[Adam Carolla]

Really? Is that true? I started off on the. On the flipper.

[Gina Grad]

I had to work the grill.

[Adam Carolla]

I worked the grill.

[Gina Grad]

But they moved you to the counter.

[Adam Carolla]

I had a boyfriend that I was blowing.

[Gina Grad]

I got to the counter.

[Adam Carolla]

That was it.

[Gina Grad]

You're blowing, kid. My manager said, time to lean, time to clean or blow.

[Bald Brian]

That's exactly it.

[Adam Carolla]

I went to hamburger university. And I'm gonna tell you what. Even with this rack with the orange and brown polyester uniform.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. That's what we're wearing. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Sort of like this couch.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

It was leather shoes.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. So. So you started at the grill. Yeah. Do you remember the lingo? Because I remember. I remember the lingo. No, it was burgers up, wrap, please. And so when you put the burgers up, you'd say, burgers up. So when you're done making the Big Macs, you'd put them up on that counter above you above the grill. Yeah. They go, burgers up, wrap, please. And then someone would go, 12 Big Macs, please, or 12 Quarter Pounders, please. And then you go, cheese count on Macs, please, because you want to know how many of them with cheese and how many without cheese.

[Adam Carolla]

I just remember fries are up.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. I didn't work the fry machine well because it splatters. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

It's awkward.

[Allison Rosen]

How is the counter?

[Adam Carolla]

The counter is. You know, I'm not gonna lie. The counter is a whole nother level of above grill.

[Gina Grad]

Oh, yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Counter is paradise. Comparatively.

[Gina Grad]

No.

[Adam Carolla]

90 people. I did in one minute.

[Gina Grad]

That's a lot of sex. It's a ton of sex.

[Allison Rosen]

You have to ice down.

[Adam Carolla]

There actually is a porn star named Lisa Ann, and I'm really thinking about campaigning to have her throw some of her numbers over to my Google account.

[Gina Grad]

Well, how did I.

[Adam Carolla]

She's doing better than I am.

[Gina Grad]

How did it work? How did you Set this record.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm so into the sex thing right now that I actually got distracted myself like that. Well, let me say this really fast.

[Gina Grad]

No, but I mean, did they have like, they have grocery bagging, commercial, you know, competitions. I don't know how low your self esteem has to be to go to one of those competitions, but they have competitions for like grocery baggers, maids. They have competitions for maids and hotels. Did they have a competition?

[Adam Carolla]

They had a record setting thing where they were gonna do it in store and then your numbers went up against the other people in the region. And it went on for like a week or two. And it was during, specifically during rush hour where they knew there were like people lined up out the door, right? So from between the hour of 12 and one they did a count on each person's little computer.

[Allison Rosen]

It's all computerized. And they know which checker is signed into which computer.

[Gina Grad]

And you, you set the record nationally.

[Adam Carolla]

Nationally. That's what they told me.

[Gina Grad]

That's my boyfriend.

[Allison Rosen]

Great things.

[Gina Grad]

Now you've just been bumped up to $2.41 an hour.

[Adam Carolla]

You got it. Exactly.

[Gina Grad]

I think I was making $2. I think I was making, I think minimum wage was like 240, 235. 231 or something. It was like insane.

[Adam Carolla]

Anytime any human being in the world thinks that we've had things come easy to us, or we're divas or, you know, you're a big star, don't you just want to hold up a work stub for the hours that you put in at jobs like that?

[Gina Grad]

Well, first off, couple things, I saved one of my construction work stubs where I made $222 for the week at $7 an hour working like a 50 hour week with taxes taken out. So I always just sort of keep that my little scrapbook to look at it every once in a while. Secondly, time does not. There's two. You want to stop time, you want to grind time to a fucking halt. You get minimum wage and you stand over a heated, a white hot sheet of steel and just work someone else's burgers that you can't put in your mouth. How long does 8 hour an 8 hour shift standing there with your cuticle smelling like onions like your sweat dripping down your fucking face?

[Adam Carolla]

That's right.

[Gina Grad]

You know, there's certain jobs like I've had jobs where I had delivery jobs and delivery jobs. The time actually goes by pretty good out and about. You're driving, standing behind a grill. Just imagine standing behind that fucking grill for one hour, right? It's brutal. And by the way, at the end of the one hour, you made $2.22, and then they took taxes out of it.

[Adam Carolla]

And you're doing the math as you stand there, because that part I remember. You're looking at the clock because they time how long the hamburgers sit there, right? And you're looking at the clock going, good. I just bought a pack of gum and it was a half hour. No, let's move on because it's so depressing.

[Allison Rosen]

I have a question.

[Adam Carolla]

Ten years I waited tables.

[Allison Rosen]

I waited tables, too, but not. I kept getting fired from every restaurant I ever.

[Gina Grad]

Really.

[Allison Rosen]

I was a terrible, terrible, terrible waitress.

[Adam Carolla]

Why not?

[Allison Rosen]

Good. I actually had trouble keeping track, like, which people was on their appetizer and who got their menu and who got their water, and I didn't care. And my customer service skills were below.

[Adam Carolla]

Because you're really hot.

[Allison Rosen]

No, I make up for it now to try. I try to be very polite to all my servers because of all the people.

[Adam Carolla]

I have a good friend who was a Maxim girl who got fired from Hooters.

[Gina Grad]

Really?

[Adam Carolla]

She got fired from Hooters? I said, how? How bad you need to up somebody's wing order, right? I mean, seriously, what do you need? How badly do you make change that you look like you and you got fired from Hooters?

[Allison Rosen]

Like I said before, I would get demoted, so I would have all. I'd have all lunch shifts where you don't make any money and bad shifts. Then pretty soon I got. So they would sort of just phase me out. But here's a question about your show, because I have many questions. Dance your ass off.

[Adam Carolla]

That's the show.

[Allison Rosen]

You're a judge.

[Adam Carolla]

Thank you for letting me say the entire show.

[Allison Rosen]

Oh, yeah, you could say it's on the Oxygen Network.

[Gina Grad]

By the way, Monday's 10pm thank you very much.

[Allison Rosen]

Okay, now, was this the show that was initially hosted by Marissa? Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, I created the show, actually, because I did a. Oh, look, there she is. And that's still the logo many places. But she's not the host anymore.

[Gina Grad]

Marissa Majera Moona.

[Adam Carolla]

Was she on your season?

[Gina Grad]

I had a very unfortunate incident with her involving her ovaries.

[Allison Rosen]

Oh, I remember.

[Adam Carolla]

Did you say something or.

[Gina Grad]

Yes, I said something about her ovaries.

[Adam Carolla]

And was. And she apprised you of the fact that she did not have any any longer?

[Gina Grad]

No, she had ovarian cancer.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. Oh, that's a comedy killer.

[Gina Grad]

And I was not.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, by the way, why did she have to bring that up?

[Gina Grad]

It's not like I can. It's not like I thump a woman like a melon and go, oh, what happened to your ovaries?

[Allison Rosen]

I assume they have them like you did.

[Gina Grad]

I can find a stud with my index finger, but I couldn't find ovaries on a hefty chest.

[Adam Carolla]

Feelings about the ovaries?

[Gina Grad]

Well, first off, she's relatively young and she doesn't seem to be in the kind of mood that would suggest she'd lost her ovaries.

[Allison Rosen]

She said all women that have their ovaries take one step forward. Not so fast.

[Gina Grad]

No, I told it before, so I'll be fast about it.

[Adam Carolla]

Please.

[Gina Grad]

As you know, if you know her, you know, she's sort of a hand wringer. She's an excitable person. I wouldn't call her nervous, but she has a lot of energy.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes.

[Gina Grad]

And Dancing with the Stars is a tough place for a person with a lot of energy who's really wringing her hands and in it to win it.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[Gina Grad]

And the torture is the first night you dance because you just don't know what the hell's gonna happen. You think you're gonna get up there and just start yelling the N word non stop. Someone tackles you.

[Adam Carolla]

Like, I was actually there the night you wrote the Unicycle because I'm there all the time.

[Gina Grad]

Well, she. Well, thank you, I guess.

[Adam Carolla]

No, I was. It was truly one of the standout moments of any season. And I completely.

[Allison Rosen]

And they edited out the N word thing.

[Gina Grad]

Then I got voted off the next day. Well, it was exciting when you saw it, right? Yeah. So I.

[Adam Carolla]

Not everybody can do that.

[Gina Grad]

I went early that the first night we danced, I danced, I don't know, number four and poor Marissa had to go number 10 or 12 or something. And you going at the end. When I fought Golden Gloves, I won at the end. And they said, you know, get to the Olympic Auditorium at 10 in the morning. And my fight was like at 4:30 in the afternoon. And all I did was pace. That was the worst fucking day of my life. I'd rather just get there three and fight and get it over with, you know. So she's back there pacing and pacing and pacing. She's going out of her mind. Hey, everyone. All these fuck sticks are saying, hey, have a good time out there. Come on, just be yourself. Have fun with it. You gotta have fun. And of course, just be yourself. No way are you gonna have fun out there. You're a fucking nervous heap. You're counting. You're not a dancer. You're freaked out. You're out of your mind.

[Allison Rosen]

20 million people are gonna watch you.

[Gina Grad]

I.

[Adam Carolla]

When you're a girl, all you really have to do is hang on. That's all I'm gonna say. All you gotta do is hang on. And maybe shimmy at Len.

[Gina Grad]

I did give Len a little shimmy. I will say that, yes, as a guy who's six foot two, who's dancing with a girl's £100, when you fuck up, everyone knows it. Like, if I'm going down, Julianne ain't gonna lift. She ain't gonna stop me at my ass from hitting the floor. If you're. If you're a girl, you can kind of get lost a little bit in your dude. A little bit.

[Adam Carolla]

Sure, she should.

[Gina Grad]

Unless you get Louie, you have to drive.

[Adam Carolla]

You have to drive the show. It's your job to be the boss on the dance.

[Gina Grad]

You can tell you look like shit. Whereas, yes, with the girl, you could sort of get lost in the guy a little bit. But either way, I just said to her, I had this great idea because I've been doing Loveline and I pride myself on some good advice, and I just said, marissa, listen, forget about having fun. Forget it. You're too nervous. It's not going to be fun. And forget about the. Oh, just enjoys it. Forget it. Experience it, drink it in, Live it. It's a kind of experience that you'll never have. It's an incredible rush. And you know what? Yeah, you're gonna be nervous and, yeah, you're gonna have those endorphins going and everything, and your mind's gonna be racing. Embrace it. Live it. Like childbirth. I said, would you want to be numbed up? Would you want to be asleep? Yes, it's painful, but it's the most beautiful experience you could ever have. And no woman would ever trade it for the world. You want to be there, and yes, there's sweat, there's tears, and there's pain. But this experience. But what mother would be that? She's like. And my ovaries were taken out.

[Adam Carolla]

Did she do.

[Gina Grad]

No, she literally. But she was. She was. She was. She was nervously laughing so hard that I was like, are you serious? And she's like, I had ovarian cancer. She was laughing. And then big asshole Penn Jillette came stomping over and he was like, yep. What did you. And he was laughing. You know, he's laughing as only atheist Pentagram shaved into his balls, you know, and he's just fucking laughing. He has a sick sense of humor. He's like. He's twisted, you know, so he's laughing. He's eight foot tall and he's laughing. She's laughing maniacally. And I can't figure out if they're having one up. One up on me or one on me. Like, are they with me now? Why is she laughing?

[Adam Carolla]

Here's the truth. She would have laughed at that. It wouldn't have been a big deal. She looked like a creep because she. She was in the state she was in. But honestly, anywhere else she would have laughed at it. She doesn't care.

[Gina Grad]

Okay.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, no, she wouldn't care.

[Gina Grad]

It was a bizarre scene.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. I actually. We were just talking about this last night. I was doing stand up. This years ago. My ex was over who's gay. So already, you know, we're having fun. And we were talking about a stand up gig I did, one of the ones I dragged the first two kids to, like, back in New Haven, Connecticut, in the dawn of time.

[Gina Grad]

When we say the two kids, you mean your tits?

[Adam Carolla]

Exactly those. Now I have the twins and the twins.

[Gina Grad]

Right.

[Adam Carolla]

They have. I actually can nurse myself. No. We were at this gig and some woman was laughing her ass off about something. I was. Some relationship that I was doing. You're married forever.

[Bald Brian]

Whatever.

[Adam Carolla]

It's falls apart. It's awful. And she's laughing to kill herself. And I finally just had to stop. I was like, what? Why? You're enjoying this so much. Did you. Is this a divorce party? Because it was all checks. And she goes, no. And I was like, what's going on? She's like, my husband. I don't know what's happening. She goes, my husband, he's not. He's. We're not divorced. I said, what happened? She goes, he died. And I was like. And the entire audience looked like, you know, deer in the headlights. And she goes. I said, well, when? A long time ago. She goes, last week. And I was like, this gets better and better. And I said, I'm so sorry. She goes, it was cancer. And the audience, I said, okay. This comedy killer. I laid on the stage and sucked my thumb in a fetal position. And I said, just let me know when you people are back. Because that was it.

[Gina Grad]

Wow.

[Adam Carolla]

We talked for a few minutes. It was fine. I got over it. But it was like, that was just the biggest comedy killer.

[Gina Grad]

Was Penn Jillette there screaming?

[Adam Carolla]

He was. He stomped in and he said he dropped the bomb and he stomped back out.

[Allison Rosen]

Marissa is.

[Gina Grad]

Did you guys Fight.

[Adam Carolla]

Did you and Penn fight? Tell me the dish.

[Gina Grad]

No, I like. I like Penn. I've been to his house. He's a very smart guy. He'll be the first guy to tell you that. But he's a super smart, interesting dude. Like, my only beef, really, with Penn Jillette. And I like Penn Jillette a lot. And it. Penn Jillette is a super accomplished, super interesting cat. Is that his. I'm an atheist, and he's an atheist, but my whole plan with being an atheist was to be left alone. I'm an atheist because I don't give a shit if I start a church for atheists. Now I'm burning calories. Now it's defeated its purpose. You know what I mean? He burns a lot of calories being an atheist.

[Adam Carolla]

So he's proselytizing. Atheist is essentially what he's doing for every single saint. I think might help me, because more than being a Catholic, I'm Sicilian. So I've got to ward off evil.

[Gina Grad]

Right.

[Adam Carolla]

And, you know, call help in. And one of them is actually a button for my cousin Tony.

[Gina Grad]

Well, trinkets made of tin are certainly going to do that. I mean, that's just good science.

[Adam Carolla]

You know what? My father was a geophysicist for NASA. And yes, I'm bragging because that government salary.

[Gina Grad]

Wow.

[Adam Carolla]

I had to work at McDonald's. But he was a big atheist. And, you know, when he was getting ready to kick the bucket of lung cancer, he was not an atheist so much anymore, really. He was like, maybe I'm wrong.

[Gina Grad]

Was that chick laughing her brains out when she heard your dad died of cancer?

[Allison Rosen]

Between Marisa.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes, everybody dies of cancer eventually.

[Allison Rosen]

Here was my question.

[Adam Carolla]

That was 1973.

[Allison Rosen]

I know, I know. I'm sorry. She was the host of your show dance your ass off. And then I read that she was let go for not being. Yes, this was a rumor.

[Adam Carolla]

First of all, let me just say this. I'd be the last person in the world, and I don't make the decisions because, let's face it, you've been an executive producer, haven't you?

[Gina Grad]

Sure. I think sometimes you don't even know it. Yeah, exactly.

[Adam Carolla]

Were you in charge of a whole lot?

[Gina Grad]

Well, it depends. When we're doing, like, crank anchors in the man show, stuff like that. I was in charge. And then there's other jobs where you're technically a producer and you have some. A hole ahead of you calling the shots.

[Adam Carolla]

Right, exactly. And they go, thank you, talent, and send you on your way. That's not exactly the case here. But in Crank Anchors and man show, which are awesome and brilliant.

[Gina Grad]

Thanks.

[Adam Carolla]

It got to be what it was because of you got you people driving it.

[Gina Grad]

That's why those shows were good. Because the guys who produced the show were not allowed to be on the set. I mean, we were allowed to be on the play. We didn't have a bunch of fuck sticks from the studio fucking with us. And that's why those shows were good.

[Adam Carolla]

So when they weren't paying attention, they got to be fantastic. So when I say it wasn't my decision, it really wasn't. It was actually made about testing and this, that and the other. But I'd be the last person in the world to hate on anybody for being heavy because I self identify as fat. If you notice, I'm covering up the side of my leg, Adam, when I'm sitting here, because there are parts of my body that I like to feature and there are parts that I like to. I wish some of this lived somewhere else.

[Gina Grad]

You self identify as fat?

[Adam Carolla]

Yes.

[Gina Grad]

I think Teresa does a little of that too.

[Adam Carolla]

It's called self loathing. We're white women in America. We have to hate ourselves.

[Gina Grad]

I know, but white women hate their ass.

[Adam Carolla]

Black women hate their hair. That's how it works.

[Allison Rosen]

I'm not fond of my hair.

[Adam Carolla]

It's absolutely true.

[Allison Rosen]

Well, you're saying yes.

[Gina Grad]

Okay.

[Adam Carolla]

Do you Brazilian your hair so it's. It's curly Normally, Yeah. So you're not only self loathing about your hair, but you're a little self loathing about the Jewishness because you have to have the straight hair.

[Allison Rosen]

Well, that's just. You're. You're not even cracking the top 50. I know.

[Adam Carolla]

I've heard you on the radio at least. This is the point of the show.

[Allison Rosen]

I all self love like Ryan. I, I actually, I was quite chubby at a certain point. I was still seeing myself.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, but Brian loves himself.

[Allison Rosen]

I know.

[Bald Brian]

What's hair?

[Allison Rosen]

Brian used to weigh 80 pounds more, but yet he's still.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, but it so doesn't have anything to do with how much you weigh.

[Gina Grad]

The thing about Brian is when I met Brian, he was. How much did you weigh, Brian?

[Bald Brian]

55 pounds more.

[Gina Grad]

Do you have your fat picture anywhere? Because Brian's fat picture is precious. I mean, Theresa, you've seen.

[Adam Carolla]

Does he have chubby cheeks?

[Gina Grad]

Yes. You've seen chubby jowls. You've seen Brian's fat picture. When I met Brian, Brian drove a piece of Chevy S10 pickup truck with a bench seat. He was 240 kinda 230ish. 230ish?

[Bald Brian]

6Ft.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, there's nothing wrong with that.

[Gina Grad]

He was fat. Was it muscle? No, he did not wear it.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, you and I know that women don't care about that. He's got a ton.

[Gina Grad]

He was fat. He drove a piece of. He made men care.

[Adam Carolla]

The kind of women you want a bone care.

[Gina Grad]

Now here's my point, right? Fat, minimum wage and drove a piece of shit brimming with self confidence.

[Allison Rosen]

You said you include no hair and no hair.

[Adam Carolla]

And you really were like.

[Gina Grad]

He felt very good about himself because.

[Bald Brian]

Was a minimum wage. I was making 10 bucks an hour.

[Gina Grad]

But you work two hours a day.

[Adam Carolla]

But you guys don't. You guys know that women don't have the same set of criteria.

[Gina Grad]

I'm just saying there's no female version of bald Brian.

[Adam Carolla]

Exactly.

[Gina Grad]

He was brimming with confidence.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, no, we all. We all hate on our.

[Gina Grad]

Still never knew.

[Adam Carolla]

And I still get pissed off about that. I mean if I see a guy with a. And we did two weeks ago. It's been a while. But I saw a guy in the yellow Trans Am with the no fat chicks bumper sticker.

[Gina Grad]

Oh really?

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, serious. You just want to drive it a time machine. That's what I'm saying. And I just wanted to drive by and look in the window and go, don't worry, dude, nobody's. We're not jumping in your, you know, passenger seat.

[Gina Grad]

And I'm not.

[Adam Carolla]

I actually look pretty good now. Especially for my age and the 7,000 children I live within. The shoe.

[Gina Grad]

Sure. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

But I. Thank you very much. I. I mean, truthfully, I don't know if I do or not because I live in la, which is a fucking theme park for men.

[Gina Grad]

Right.

[Adam Carolla]

I call it Puss Island. There's so many prom queens that move here to be actresses.

[Gina Grad]

That was on oxygen. I've definitely. Yeah. You got another hosting gig.

[Adam Carolla]

It's a hit.

[Gina Grad]

Pack your choker, Propes. We're going to Puss Island.

[Adam Carolla]

I think all the prom queens come out here.

[Allison Rosen]

Oh, and the title holders.

[Adam Carolla]

The title holders.

[Allison Rosen]

The hottest girl from every high school class.

[Adam Carolla]

Exactly. And they take the crown off and they get on the bus and they come out here and then they are serving you pancakes@ihop. So it fucks up the bell curve.

[Gina Grad]

I know Brian's got a wood.

[Allison Rosen]

Where we came from. We were hugging the mean, right? It was fine.

[Adam Carolla]

Are. Are you kidding me? I was hot. Back in the hometown.

[Allison Rosen]

I was hugging the mean. I was not an Outlier.

[Gina Grad]

Now, T bone, I know you got a. You got what we call a hard out.

[Allison Rosen]

I got kids to take care of.

[Gina Grad]

How many do you have?

[Allison Rosen]

Well, I guess I just have one, but you have four, so I felt like I should make it plural.

[Gina Grad]

When you say kids, people think you have more than one.

[Allison Rosen]

I got a kid and I got a sitter. I just gotta leave.

[Adam Carolla]

Are you not including one of your dogs as. As a kid, are you?

[Allison Rosen]

No, no. Sorry. I'm just so tired. Kim Woke up at 2:30. You know how it is.

[Adam Carolla]

My kids wake up at 2:30.

[Gina Grad]

Don't go anywhere. We're gonna put a bow on this thing and rant out a little bit early.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, I started ranting about fat chicks. He got really bored.

[Allison Rosen]

Well, you know what? You know, can I let her answer the question because it was all out in the press. No, she got fired.

[Gina Grad]

All the fellas were buzzing about it.

[Allison Rosen]

For being your audience.

[Adam Carolla]

Exactly.

[Allison Rosen]

They care.

[Gina Grad]

All the guys at Leno shop were visibly disturbed.

[Adam Carolla]

You know what? I gotta say one thing in defense of fat girls everywhere and I include myself in this. Don't be so dismissive, because if they like putting in their mouth, you could be next.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, I agree. I agree. Yeah, they like we have oral fixations.

[Allison Rosen]

Don't hate consumption is consumption.

[Gina Grad]

I agree. That's right.

[Adam Carolla]

Plus, they try harder.

[Gina Grad]

Oh, absolutely. Yeah.

[Allison Rosen]

Well, everyone knows that and everything. So she was not let go because of her weight?

[Adam Carolla]

No, not at all. In fact, the show was set up a whole lot different last season than it is this season. There was. There's more interaction this season and she was. She's got a great gig. Are you kidding me? She's on like the CBS show.

[Allison Rosen]

I know, it's gonna be huge. The talk.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, no, it was a lot of standup stuff with prompter reading and it was not her comfort zone. And so there was discussion. It was a mutually agreed upon thing and that's it. But the show itself is doing very well.

[Allison Rosen]

And now there's a.

[Gina Grad]

Who.

[Allison Rosen]

Who took over for her?

[Adam Carolla]

Mel B. A Spice Girl.

[Gina Grad]

Oh, yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Who I swear is gonna make me gay. I think it's her intention.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Was she on your season?

[Gina Grad]

Mel G is gonna make me gay. I love it when he abuses us women verbally.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, that one has.

[Allison Rosen]

He left.

[Gina Grad]

Makes me hot.

[Adam Carolla]

I gotta tell you right now.

[Gina Grad]

You can have Mel B. I'll take Mel G. I got hammered.

[Allison Rosen]

Racist fight.

[Gina Grad]

Come on. Talk dirty. Drop an inbound.

[Adam Carolla]

Come on, Mel G. I just think that the man needs a blow dry.

[Gina Grad]

Call me Sugar tits. One more time. We're gonna come.

[Adam Carolla]

Clearly he just needs one real bad.

[Gina Grad]

Well, he's got one coming from the ace, man. Let's see if the jacuzzi.

[Adam Carolla]

Mel G. Every guy in the world would I in a second. But I want Mel G, Mad Max version. Not this crazy, drugged out. I don't want that version. But he has made life easier for every other man in America. You guys got to give him that.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, yeah, because you have that. At least we're not.

[Adam Carolla]

That he's not threatening to bury me in the rose garden and demanding the.

[Allison Rosen]

Blowjob before the hot tub.

[Gina Grad]

Well, before it burns down the house.

[Adam Carolla]

It's reasonable.

[Gina Grad]

All right? Either way, you blow Mel B. I'll blow Mel G. All right? Everyone will be happy.

[Adam Carolla]

We'll see who gets to Gomorrah. What?

[Gina Grad]

Lisa and Walter. You can twitter her, by the way at Lisa and Walter. You can tweet Twitter me, by the way. I've been. I've been twittering everyone.

[Allison Rosen]

I'm enjoying your tweets. Very funny.

[Gina Grad]

Oh, thank you. Yeah, look out world. I've been. I don't know, I just. Whatever. I try to say something funny once a day. I don't even know how to spell it.

[Allison Rosen]

It's about the view or whatever I'm.

[Gina Grad]

Gonna get my tweet on. So check out my Twitter. And we'll book still for sale. And you do the pre sale. We will get you out the book plate. 2500.

[Adam Carolla]

Did we talk about.

[Gina Grad]

And it's all good.

[Allison Rosen]

Oh, you can see Lisa Ann Walter at John Lovitz's comedy club, you know, at Universal CityWalk.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh yeah, we're doing actually a laugh your ass off show that's all about self loathing with Brian Scolaro, Tiffany Haddish and Alan Stevens.

[Gina Grad]

Toss out the date.

[Adam Carolla]

It is tomorrow on the 5th, 8pm and if you dance for us, we'll give you two bucks off your ticket price or something like that.

[Gina Grad]

Good times. Yes, Paul. Brian, you're about to yell something. You're cool. All right, so until next time, this Adam Corolla for bald Brian. Lisa Ann Walter and Teresa Stross are saying mahalo. And now your Adam Carolla extra little extra content with my new best friend, Lisanne Walter. Good to see you, sweetie.

[Adam Carolla]

Hi. Yeah, I just do all the interviews like that.

[Gina Grad]

I used to just. I used to just sit here and talk by myself, but I was really boring. So I decided if someone's funny, they should hang out and help me after the show. And that's Your job, baby.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh my God. Did you just pick me?

[Gina Grad]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

I feel picked. Yeah, I was never picked.

[Gina Grad]

Really?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. No one pick you? No. I don't know. I was always pick less and, and I can like play cleanup with you know, a little baseball action.

[Gina Grad]

Hit cleanup I think is what you'd be doing.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, did I say pitch?

[Gina Grad]

No, you'd play. But you play doctor and hit cleanup, you know.

[Adam Carolla]

And we talked a little bit on the show about, you know, self pleasuring and I have to tell you that I got in a bit of trouble the last time I did radio with you, which was a few years ago, back when I was enjoying the gin and juice or whatever it was. I brought in the Big Gulp cup that to the studio and I did an overshare about how I learned to masturbate in the tub.

[Gina Grad]

Well, re overshare. And speaking of the tub, Woo. Every chick I know loves that goddamn tub.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm telling you, if the shower massage had a dental plan, I would marry it. Marry it tomorrow because it never fights. It always knows what it's doing. And oral is a lost art. I'm coming to find out I have a young boyfriend. He's adorable. He's very enthusiastic. It's like having a puppy with a laptop and a 24 hour hard on. But they don't take pride in the oral so much anymore. Yeah, it used to be the real, you know, you wanted repeat business.

[Gina Grad]

Here's the problem. The catch 22 of oral there is. There are dudes that are really into it, right? But they're creepy dudes.

[Adam Carolla]

That's what I'm saying.

[Gina Grad]

It's like you should want a guy who has a casual relationship with oral sex. Not a guy like I want to munch your box for three days. No. And by the way, I'll never come up for air. And you never know what hit you.

[Adam Carolla]

That's not a selling point to a girl because I'm going to tell you right now, it's a sensitive area. It's a tiny little area, many nerve endings as the head of your action, your junk, your big junk. Big junk. And it hurts if you go at it too long. And now they're very aggressive. They point the tongue. I blame video games. I think that they think that there's a target that they have to hit and you're become Mario Galaxy.

[Gina Grad]

Well either way they're, you know, they're beat up on Rockstar and everyone's fucking supersizing. There's no sit back and relax anymore. It's all Just. You're the best. You go for it. You want some? You get my face take shit down. You were man enough to get the fucking. Fucking man up and eat pussy. You fucking man up. Getting the octagon. Start eating pussy. You want to fucking throw down? We'll throw down on that. I just had 16 ounce rock stars and I'm beat up. And I'll go to.

[Adam Carolla]

He just turned into Diedrich Bader. Napoleon Dynamite.

[Gina Grad]

Give me a Slim Jim. Yeah, well, everything's been like super sized and in your face and like, you.

[Adam Carolla]

Gotta be the best and do it the longest, the hardest, right?

[Gina Grad]

It's. It's the X game that's going on.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't need Olympia.

[Gina Grad]

Nobody has this mellow, gentle.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[Gina Grad]

I'll eat your nice. Yeah, it'll be like a bread song.

[Adam Carolla]

Know, I like a good actual.

[Gina Grad]

You don't be raped with a Red Bull can. You know what?

[Adam Carolla]

This is what got me into problems the last time. Because you go down that road and you're really good. You're like a snake charmer. And then all of a sudden I'm sharing about how I learned to masturbate in the tub and my kids telling me that his friends at school have listened to the whole thing and have taped it.

[Gina Grad]

Oh, okay. All right.

[Adam Carolla]

It's just a good thing that he plays hockey and he's big.

[Gina Grad]

Well, Lisa, let's leave it at that then.

[Adam Carolla]

Do you think?

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. All right, now I gotta squeeze one off. That was your Adam Corolla extra. And now your Adam Corolla extra. Hey, I got your extra content right here with Lisa and Walter. And by the way, Lisa Ann, I'll just call you Lisa Ann.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, you call me Lisa, I'll call you.

[Gina Grad]

Lisa can be found at Laugh your ass off. That's at John Lovitz's club, at some. At the Universal City walk. And that is on August 5th, which is tonight, tomorrow. Wait a minute, you gotta edit that now. What's the date today? This airs tomorrow. Oh, so it's tonight. Okay, for this one?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, sorry.

[Gina Grad]

That's all right. Which is tonight at 8pm and Lisa and I were just talking off the air about what a gentleman I was on Dancing with the Stars.

[Adam Carolla]

You were. You were really charming. You were. You were absolutely adorable. And I thought you did really well on a lot of the dances and you were really grateful and sweet with your partner. You never tried to bang her?

[Gina Grad]

No, I mean, I did my mind.

[Adam Carolla]

Right, you know, but that's where most of the really good banging happens.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. And to be fair, she was so busy answering text messages from Dave.

[Adam Carolla]

Whoever.

[Gina Grad]

Whoever. No, it never ends. David Spade, Was that it? Yeah. Seriously, you get text messages from David Spade all. All day.

[Adam Carolla]

Were they dating or just in his.

[Gina Grad]

Mind, I think he was trying to fuck her.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, what are the odds? It's David.

[Gina Grad]

It was her fault for being blonde and setting foot in California and 19. Oh yeah. Now at that point she's asking for it.

[Adam Carolla]

And those outfits, Come on. David's not wrong.

[Gina Grad]

She shouldn't dress that way.

[Adam Carolla]

Absolutely not on abc.

[Gina Grad]

Well, it's. I'm glad you brought up me being liked. Over at Dancing with the Stars, I was liked mainly because I wasn't a cock. And you have to do so little in this town to be liked, which is not be colossal cock. Like, I would just show up and say hi to everybody and do your job. And do my job. And then say thank you, like to.

[Adam Carolla]

The makeup and hair people.

[Gina Grad]

I sat down in the chair and they'd go, do you have any specific requests? And I'd go, just do your job. You know, you're. I would always say you're the expert.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[Gina Grad]

I don't know anything about makeup. You're the makeup expert. So whatever you think. If you think I have dark circles under my eyes and fix them. Yeah, but do what you do.

[Adam Carolla]

Exactly.

[Gina Grad]

And they'd say, what about your hair? And I'd go, eh, it's a little piece pubesque, so something a little shiny. And they're all in love with me by virtue of not being Jeremy Piven. It's like, it's like all you gotta do is not be a cock.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[Gina Grad]

And they like you.

[Adam Carolla]

Surprise you. How many people you hear this about. Oh my God, he's so sweet. I remember when Chappelle started and I was in New York doing stand up and he was, you know, I'm from D.C. so I was like really excited to see him come up. Was like, he's so nice. He was 18 and he had the world by the balls.

[Gina Grad]

Sure.

[Adam Carolla]

At some point it was just like, what do you have to be pissed about? He better be nice. If not, he's a dick.

[Gina Grad]

Well, by the way, you're sitting on a leather chair in an air conditioned trailer.

[Adam Carolla]

You're not digging ditches.

[Gina Grad]

Right. And somebody just asked you where you want your food dropped off and there's some poor chick who's rubbing makeup on your face and you're sitting there listening to your earbuds and you're getting paid for. For it. What kind of mood are you gonna be in? Well, and if you were in a shitty mood, it'd have nothing to do with the hair or makeup person, so why take it out on them?

[Adam Carolla]

Spade is texting you. But, you know, honestly, you did work an actual job for a living, which makes you slightly different. Some of these people, you know, they do come off the bus right from the pageant and they. They're gonna have an attitude. And I'm telling you, I've done these running show stuff and writing and actually working for a living and waited tables for many years and was a mom. And I've done to sit in a chair and people say, what would you like in your egg whites? And I will pick that shit any day of the week and twice on Sunday. Yeah, that is. That to me is like Mother's Day when I go to work.

[Gina Grad]

You want to know what David Spade's main text to Julianne Hough was?

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, wait, I want to lay like this and hear it.

[Gina Grad]

How about you come over after rehearsal for a juice box?

[Adam Carolla]

And when he said juice box, whose did he mean?

[Gina Grad]

Seriously now? I have no idea. It was just. I didn't want to get involved with, you know, the part, you know, when the hot chick. It's the funniest thing in the world when the hot chick does that thing where they go. I mean it. I've met many a hot chick and it's like, no, it'd be like, these hot chicks would be like, my landscaper, he baked me a pie.

[Adam Carolla]

And they can't believe.

[Gina Grad]

And they're like, they can't. He's such a. Such a sweet guy. And then he offered to. He offered. He put in the Texas privet for free. He put in the free and then insisted on hanging out. It's like. And I'm like, he's trying to fuck you well.

[Adam Carolla]

But I gotta tell you something, sweet angel of the Lord, I was absolutely in disbelief that any of these guys were interested in banging me. And it took me. They literally have to whip it out and wave it in my face. My ex husband. My. My ex husband. Not the gay one, the cheater. Afterwards, he was constantly telling me, that guy does not want to do a project with you. He wants, you know, to work the magic. Yeah, he wants you to. He wants to experience the legend. And I'm like, no, he's married. He's just really nice.

[Gina Grad]

And, you know, I think somewhere in the back of their beautiful minds, they know that. But on the other hand, David Spade wants to come over for a juice Box. And I'm getting a free apple pie, so why not? He's gonna bite this hand.

[Adam Carolla]

I like the ones who just cop to it. I like the Bill Mahers. And the people are just like, I'm never getting married. It doesn't. It's not gonna work for me, George Clooney. Go ahead, play around.

[Gina Grad]

Next life, I'm coming back. I'm going Clooney.

[Adam Carolla]

Why are. Why do you not believe that you could be.

[Gina Grad]

I'm not cut out that way. I'm not.

[Adam Carolla]

You're good looking.

[Gina Grad]

Just a long pause.

[Adam Carolla]

No, no, no. I was for dramatic effect.

[Gina Grad]

You're good looking.

[Adam Carolla]

You're tall. You're dark. I'm already on the show, so I'm not trying to. But seriously, why wouldn't you be?

[Gina Grad]

Because I want. Well, first off, I don't. I believe that. That is. I don't believe that those guys are any happier than any guy who's in a steady relationship. Number one, it's. We think they're happier.

[Adam Carolla]

Stop it. I'm a little bit in love with you right now.

[Gina Grad]

I don't think.

[Adam Carolla]

Stop it.

[Gina Grad]

I think it's a cycle. I. I don't.

[Adam Carolla]

You're absolutely right.

[Gina Grad]

I do think it's a cycle. And a. And it gets. It starts getting sad when they get into their mid-40s, and then B, I love the. Out of my kids.

[Adam Carolla]

Exactly. Would you want to see them, like, two days out of the week?

[Gina Grad]

No, I like to see them, like, every other month.

[Adam Carolla]

Why is everybody getting divorced these days?

[Gina Grad]

I don't know. I don't want to be away from my kids. I couldn't imagine where. Well, I live in Florida and they live in Baton Rouge, but I see them on the.

[Adam Carolla]

But I'm a great dad.

[Gina Grad]

I'm a great dad. No, I'm a great dad. Just last Christmas.

[Adam Carolla]

Exactly. You know what I think it is? We have had an entire generation that we grew up in, with all of those books launching it, that when the whole divorce thing started. I'm okay. You're okay. I'm growing a mustache. It's fine if I leave this family because I found a hot piece that I like better. And we. They got so supported to just make themselves happy that all of the integrity stuff, if it wasn't connected with religion and guilt, Right? Not at all funny. Is the show supposed to be funny, or is conversation okay? Okay. So everybody got so okay with being an asshole, right? That they just got to a point where they were like, kids are better off. And it's like, no, they're fucking not. Yeah, My kids try to get me and my ex back together like we were living the parent trap in real life. I was in the movie. But this is not gonna happen.

[Gina Grad]

Well, they're not better off. They shouldn't be doing their own thing. They're kids. They want to intact family. And if you want kids, then you should want to have a stable environment to raise those kids. And that is my goal.

[Adam Carolla]

What happens if you want to play around?

[Gina Grad]

Even if it means beating off to George Claudy's girlfriend?

[Adam Carolla]

I'm saying yeah, and I'm gonna beat off to George Clifford Clooney.

[Gina Grad]

And what's wrong with you beating off the Clooney? I think that's it.

[Adam Carolla]

Why can't girls have better words for masturbating than beating off? Because what am I? I'm not beating it because that hurts.

[Gina Grad]

You got an innie and we got an Audi, and that's how.

[Adam Carolla]

Great. I have a word for it. You want to hear?

[Gina Grad]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Wetting down the slip and slide.

[Gina Grad]

Oh, I like that.

[Adam Carolla]

Do you like that one?

[Gina Grad]

Now I'm getting hot.

[Adam Carolla]

How about this one? Finger painting my Georgia O'Keeffe.

[Gina Grad]

I like that. Yeah, it's a little arty and also has that sort of Arizona motif going, right?

[Adam Carolla]

It does. It's got some. Some pinks and some blues in it. Or let's see, what's the other one?

[Gina Grad]

Turquoise.

[Adam Carolla]

Don't stop playing. Chopsticks on my pie. Anno.

[Gina Grad]

I like that. Donnie is the sofa Scotch garden. We have to flip the cushion. All right, let's go out on top, Lisa. People can find you again at your Twitter Lisanne Walter. Twitter Lisa Annisa Ann Walter. That was your Adam Carolla extra.

[Skip Bedell]

All right, that's Adam Carolla Show 378.

[Bald Brian]

Coming up next, we have Adam Cola Show 1314 featuring Joe Quirk, Allison Roseman, Brian Bishop.

[Skip Bedell]

This one's from 2014. It's a nice vibe.

[Bald Brian]

How the show was evolving by 2014. Allison's final year of the show.

[Skip Bedell]

Hope you guys enjoy.

[Gina Grad]

Hey, it's Adam Kroll from the Adam Kroll the Show Bet Online is the world's most trusted betting platform and your number one source for online betting, from the earliest odds to in game live betting. BetOnline provides you with all the action and the ability to watch and bet on games as they happen. With the largest selection of odds on everything from football, NBA, college basketball as well. BetOnline has NHL, MMA and championship boxing. All your betting needs in one place. Head to Betonline today to get in on the action with America's most trusted site for online wagering. So have some fun. Make these games and these events and these combat sports a little more interesting with Betonline. Betonline. The game starts here, actually. Kind of interesting. Good day, Allison Roses. Hello, Adam. Carolla Baldwin.

[Adam Carolla]

Also, I love Dick.

[Bald Brian]

That was from Aisha Tyler while you were gone. She was the host, and that was requested by Nikasio S. With the hashtag Topdrop.

[Gina Grad]

Well, she's great. And I've heard nothing but great things about everybody. I mean, on Twitter.

[Bald Brian]

So far, so great. All the hosts have been, I mean, their own way. You know, they bring their own flavors to the show.

[Gina Grad]

But I was entering, just passing the halfway point of shooting this film I'm working on, and it was interesting. I was talking to a. We have the two camera guys. One's Swedish and the other guy's German, which is. It's. You can say whatever you want about stereotypes, but those are the nationalities you want working the cameras. And they're super anal, precise people. And the German guy was explaining. I said, well, you know, everyone will be hooking up or getting drunk or whatever at the wrap party. And he said, oh, in Germany, they have the hump party, which is like the halfway point.

[Bald Brian]

Halfway there point.

[Gina Grad]

He said, that's where everybody hooks it up. They get to the middle of the shoot and that's when they. You know, any excuse to drink. But the thing I.

[Bald Brian]

For the Germans.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, the thing I like. I don't know if you guys. There's something that's kind of fun about the movie set. Cause there's a little bit of a military part to it, which is you're always up against the. The time and everyone is moving. And there's not a ton of thank yous and pleases. It's just more like we all know what we're doing here. There's way too much. Like, this guy Morton is a crazy artist, and he's really great at what he does. And then there's a lot of times he's the dp. Yeah. And he's just good. He makes everything look amazing. But you'll come up to him and you'll go, morton, don't you think if you turn the cameras around and we shot it from the other side, that we could get a better shot? And I think it just. It'd look better with the background and everything. And he just. He'd be looking into his viewfinder and he'll just go, no. But then you move on now, I can't stand it. But here's the whole thing. He means no, like as. He doesn't mean you're stupid.

[Bald Brian]

No, he means, I've considered that, and.

[Gina Grad]

I like my idea better because this is what I do. And I can't stand when people are like, hey, at least show me the respect of saying, that's a good idea. But I think we're gonna go in a different direction. I like it. He's just answering your fucking question. He thinks no is the answer. And then there are times when I've been with him. Oh, boy. I got to be a big shot. I got to look through one of those lenses that was on a stick. You know, it looks like a lens pistol. It's like, you know that thing you hold up? It was right up there. My life dream is to make that box out of my hand and hold it up in front of beautiful women and go, wait a minute, wait a minute. Stop, stop. Don't talk. Let me see you.

[Bald Brian]

Well, you're doing it to thousand right now.

[Gina Grad]

Yes. Well, I could do it to. I can't hire a beautiful. No, what I'm saying is this. The thumb. Come on, Brian. Not as much fun anymore. The thumb and the forefinger. I saw in every time a guy played a director in a sitcom. Wait, wait, wait. He'd be wearing a kerchief, a neck kerchief, and he'd hold his thumbs up and do that thing I got to go stand up on. I said to the guy, look, you want to film me running into the hotel room at night? Running through the lobby? And he's like, yeah, I'm thinking I should put the camera here and we'll get you. And I looked up and I saw a big, like, sort of mezzanine balcony or something, and I said, why don't we shoot it up there? And we'll shoot down at me coming in through the thing. And he was like, huh, okay. And we walked up there, and he had his little thing with the lens on it, and he said, here. And he looked through, and he went, yeah, we'll do it here. And first off, that's his end of the bargain. His end of the bargain is, oh, I hear your idea of let's shoot it up there and let's shoot it down and let's get kind of an aerial shot. That's his end of the bargain. And then my end of the bargain is, the next time I say, you want to go up there and shoot? And he'll go, no, I Don't get offended or upset or my panties in a bunch. I don't get the people that are wired that way. I don't know. You have to be wildly insecure. This guy that knows what he's doing just doesn't think it's a good idea.

[Bald Brian]

That and yes, you've asked the expert, right? You've given him your thoughts. And the guy who knows a lot more about it than you, if Laszlo Kovacs is on set and he says, hey, Morton, how about we do this? I'm sure Morton would consider it a lot longer than if dude Flip Flops walks up and asks the same thing. Yeah, you ask the expert.

[Gina Grad]

I'm the star and I'm the director and the writer, but that's not. I'm not the dp. So he says no. And then it's faster and it's more efficient. And that's, by the way, how everyone should just be wired. He should have the freedom to say no, not no with a super long soft landing or preamble that comes before it. And then I should be able to hear his no and move on. Because we're living in a world where we're trying to be fucking efficient. And how much do you want to talk about something that you're not going to do?

[Bald Brian]

Could you actually override him if you wanted to?

[Gina Grad]

I suppose, but that's the other thing. You know, it's like I got in the show business. The very first thing I did was I got a tax guy, like a money guy, because I would fuck it up. I have to pay my taxes quarterly. I'd be in jail with Wesley Snipes. He'd be raping me violently right now as we speak, as you hear this, I would be his bottom. I would be his coaster. Wesley's coaster. That's what I would be. And I knew it's your fourth book, Wesley's Coaster, but when it comes to building the studio, I didn't hire a contractor to build me a studio. I built the studio because that's something know how to do. So be realistic about the things you do know how to do and realistic about the things you don't know how to do and then defer to. And at some point, if you realize you're better than the other person, then go ahead and impose your will. But I don't think I'm better than this guy. Why should I? And I'll trust him. So that's the thing. I feel like there's too many people thinking they're good at Too much shit. And you will get. You will. First off, you can get your ass kicked if you think you're tougher than you are. So if you're gonna get out of your car and go bang on someone's window, make sure you're tougher for Rampage.

[Bald Brian]

Jackson to come out.

[Gina Grad]

Right? Yes. Yesterday's show could come out of the tailpipe and kick the shit out of you. That's. Just be prepared. Now what you can do is you can train real hard and work real hard. And probably, statistically, when you get out of your car and bang on the window, it won't be Quentin Rampage Jackson in that car. Maybe Randy Couture or John. No. Probably not going to be a guy with that kind of training, and you probably will win. But let the experts do their job. That's the way I feel. And until they demonstrate that, they cannot. So I guess we could argue about it, but I rarely do. On the other hand, my last movie, I did the Hammer, and we had an editor who would argue with us all the time and we would override him. And we did know better than he did on many occasions, even though he was a professional editor. So it varies, but either way, there is the hump day party that they do in Germany where it literally turns into a hump day party.

[Bald Brian]

Can we do that here?

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. Like for what?

[Bald Brian]

Today's Wednesday. Oh, every week, you mean?

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. Now, Ball. Bryan, where are you signing your book next?

[Bald Brian]

Tomorrow night in Ridgewood, New Jersey, which is, I'm told, a very nice part of New Jersey. And it's at a store called Bookends, I think it's 7pm and I would love to see everyone who's in the area. So come on out and I'll sign some books and read a short passage.

[Gina Grad]

All right, Q and A, all that stuff. I was happy to have a conversation with my son today where my daughter came in to the living room and she said, I want to get my ears pierced. I was like, oh, boy. And I said, you don't need your ears pierced. And she said, I want my ears pierced. Everyone in my class has their ears pierced. Blah, blah, blah, ears pierced. And then I said, what about you, sonny? You want to get your ears pierced? And he said, why? And I said, I don't know. Guys have their ears pierced. Why don't you want your ears pierced? And he said. He literally said, what? It's pointless. And I said, yeah, tell me more. And he said, well, what do you get out of it, you know? And I said, I don't know. A lot of guys do it, you know. Yeah, you get to fuck dumb chicks. And he's like, yeah, I know, but what is it? Well, how does it help you? Like, what's good about it? Like, why? And I was like, I don't know. I fucking. I feel like I say that about three quarters of everything on the planet. Like, what is this guy fucking doing with this stuff? And it's like, he thinks like an old me, sadly. But he's pragmatic. So insanely pragmatic. Well, it hurts. You pay them. Why are you doing it? And what does it net you? And the answer is nothing. Nothing and nothing. And I'll hopefully hit the grave minus a piercing and probably minus any jewelry at all. Minus a tattoo, minus anything. Now, I understand there's the gets you laid part. And I suppose.

[Bald Brian]

But that's a dubious notion with earrings.

[Gina Grad]

Once everyone's got an earring, what fucking good does it do you? And then I just. It's weird.

[Bald Brian]

Harrison Ford's got anything. How are we supposed to compete with that?

[Gina Grad]

Right? How's that work? But I liked where his mind was at, which is. I don't get the practical application with the hole in the lobe of your ear. And once everyone on the fucking planet's had it done, who really gives a shit at this point anymore? Hard to talk the daughter out of it. Then she wanted me to take her to the American Girl store. After that, thank God there's not one nearby. Are you going to let her get her ears pierced? I don't. I'm against everything, but I do also realize I don't, you know, like, I don't know what. You got to pick your battles. You know what I mean? Like, she's going to get her ears pierced. I'm trying to do that thing where I feel like young women and women in general, as I now study it, spend an incredible amount of time on shit that doesn't get them any further along. Hair and makeup and piercing earrings. And I know it's all part of the. That's encoded. I don't know. They want to be attractive. They like things that are that way. But I would like. And then I also know that we've created a society where it's not acceptable for women to go out to work with not a stitch of makeup on and their hair all frizzy and sweatpants, you know?

[Skip Bedell]

Yeah, it is.

[Gina Grad]

It's sadly not acceptable. But if you really think about the fact that, you know, we all have 24 hours, men and women, everyone you know, deducts eight hours, for the sake of argument. Not when you're shooting an independent film off for sleep. That leaves you 16 for whatever. And women are spending an hour a day on something other than math and science. You know, if not more or if not more, depending on the person and the money and the time, and that's that day. But then later on in the week, it's the trip to the salon with the thing and the solution and the coloring or whatever it is. You take that chunk of life where they go like, well, the average Californian will spend eight years in traffic by the end of their. I don't know what the average woman spends at the salon or with the hairdryer blowing and Aquanet blowing around, going, Being weaponized. Now, when it hits the heat from the hairdryer and frying everyone's brain, applying the makeup and then removing the makeup, and then applying the makeup and then removing the makeup.

[Bald Brian]

Alison, you wear makeup.

[Gina Grad]

I mean, I am naturally attractive, but on occasion, I will gild the lily. That's exactly what it is. So when you take a woman at the end of her life and go, this is the time that she spent putting it on, taking it off, going through these various procedures, all the many waxings and applications of this and all that, look, some get away with it and some need a little more work than others. But either way, the amount of money, energy, and time expended on just that one behavior, it's putting them at a deficit like it really is. I wouldn't call it crippling, but it's not fair.

[Bald Brian]

I've actually really begun to resent the.

[Gina Grad]

Amount of time it takes to put on all the full face of makeup, which, as I say this, I'm just wearing lipstick and, like, some powder.

[Bald Brian]

I don't have everything on because I.

[Gina Grad]

Realized I'm so much happier when I don't spend the time putting it all on. But that means I'm sacrificing things like looking okay in a photo or whatever else may come up. It is a weird situation. It's weird to be female and to deal with that pressure and to realize that, okay, I'm not. I don't look as good as I.

[Bald Brian]

Could because I don't want to spend.

[Gina Grad]

This time putting all this shit on my face. It'd be nice if there was a. You know. So my daughter, everything about her is just being pretty about being pretty, about, you know, being pretty. I mean, she likes ice skating and she's smart and she's very athletic and Stuff like that. But all the conversation is just about, you know, being pretty, being pretty, being pretty. And it's like, I don't want her to. I don't want that to be the end all and be all. On the other hand, I don't think the game has changed much in 50 years. You know, all the progress, all the discussions. I mean, the notion that women didn't have the right to vote 100 years ago, or I don't know what year this whole suffrage thing jumped in or whatever it was, but look up the date, but either way, about 100 years.

[Bald Brian]

Ago, a little more, I think.

[Gina Grad]

And then it was, you know, we got to the 50s and it was barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen and all the equal pay and equal thing, they didn't work and blah, blah, blah. You think about all the progress we let him make. 19, 13, by the way. 101 years. So how far women have come in terms of all the different various facets of life? This is one particular topic I don't feel like they've moved an inch on. And it's the one thing they haven't been focusing on. And it's the one thing, guys, no one's championing this cause or if they do, they don't. Because they go, if you have hairy.

[Bald Brian]

Armpits and something like that, that's seen.

[Gina Grad]

As some kind of radical transgressive move, right? And then we all go, well, but look at Lena Dunham. I mean, she's overweight, she's naked, she's in the bathtub, blah, blah, blah. Then she goes on the COVID of Vogue and it's airbrushed and she's got a bunch of makeup on, and she looks 20 pounds lighter. And it's like, she doesn't look like Cindy Crawford, but she don't look like Lena Dunham either. She looks like the best version that that could possibly be. Every woman wants to look beautiful and glamorous, right? And, okay, so that's where we're at. But we're pretending like we're not there. We're pretending like, oh, no, that's a vestige of the past, and that's something the man cooked up. And this, that and the other. I don't feel like the man is perpetuating this. I feel like women could get together and kind of reel this one in a little bit. And I don't know, do you think.

[Bald Brian]

You could train your penis to be okay with that?

[Gina Grad]

Because I've also heard you say that what you're attracted to is Hardwired in. Well, there's a kind of. Here's what it is. First off, I could get my penis too. My balls would not go long. And if they would, it'd be begrudgingly.

[Bald Brian]

They'd be dragging behind both nuts folded. I'm going, but I'm not happy about it.

[Gina Grad]

Doing this under formal protest, by the way. And when I get back to the asshole, he's gonna get a, pardon the pun, ass full of you. And this new makeup policy of yours, I think, see, here's the problem. It's like steroids in the Olympics. If everyone didn't use it, then it'd be an even playing field and be fine. Like if you just said to women, look, you treat it like, you know, college sports or whatever we talk about, you can't start spring training or you can't start football practice a year in advance. You know, you gotta start it. You put limits on it. You go, look, you got 15 minutes to do whatever the fuck you want with your hair in your face. And then you gotta leave the house. And everyone would just. But women would quickly go to a half hour and then an hour, and then they'd have some sort of unfair advantage over and blah blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I don't know. I think most of the men I ever speak to say I like a woman to look more natural. I don't want all the big makeup, of course. I don't want all the things like the big nails and the big jewelry.

[Bald Brian]

And painted on eyebrows.

[Gina Grad]

Big painted on eyebrows and the huge hoops swinging from the lobes of the ears and all that kind of shit. Not, you know, the huge stripper wedgies and everything clunking around like a Clydesdale. Most that, first off, you could remove 65 to 80% of the bullshit. That's just chick on chick crime. That's just chicks dressing. That's just chicks with a female fetish trying to impress other females. That doesn't do anything for dudes. We don't need all that stuff. There's a fast way to get through this. I don't know. But all that. Still, to look attractive in a natural way for a lot of women still.

[Bald Brian]

Takes a lot of time.

[Gina Grad]

Well, I have an interesting, controversial, revolutionary plan. Let's hear it, sister.

[Bald Brian]

President Yu.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, the burqa. Not a bad plan, except for if you're gonna go ahead and then dump acid on the chick for reading a book, now it's defeating its purpose. I say we bring the burqa over here. I'm fine with that we could go to fucking town. All the chicks rock the burqas here and now. But encouraged to stay, think of our.

[Bald Brian]

Butts under the burqa.

[Gina Grad]

Butt burqa. Gigantic. Love to fart in that burqa. That'd be an awesome experience. Yeah, it's a walking Dutch oven. It really is. No, if you think about you rock the burka. You save all the time on all the lipstick and all the makeup and all the hair and everything. But we encourage the work and the science and the math and the studying and all that kind of stuff. Boom. Everything through the roof.

[Bald Brian]

Brilliant reality show and social experiment.

[Gina Grad]

Thank you. All right. Oh, 1920, by the way, was the right. I thought it was something like that. I thought it was the twenties, too, but because I was a woman, I.

[Bald Brian]

Was afraid to speak up around you guys.

[Gina Grad]

Was someone talking, Brian?

[Bald Brian]

I wouldn't know. A lot of microphone noise in the background.

[Gina Grad]

That was.

[Bald Brian]

We'll fix it in post.

[Gina Grad]

One of the first man show bits we did was to repeal women's suffrage. And we didn't want to repeal it, but we wanted to end women's suffrage. A lot of women's suffering out there and trying to get the people to sign the petitions. And there was some point when some husky chick came up to us and the woman was signing. And I always love this part when the most progressive people on the planet jump in front of you and go, these are white males. Do not listen. Like, what are you doing? These are white. Like, first off, why are you working race into this most progressive person on the planet? Like, most evolved person on the planet. Why are you working race into this whole thing? But we were sitting there with a camera. There's one guy that was really livid about it. Like, he was like, oh, do you understand what you're doing? And he kept saying, like, what is this, some kind of hidden camera show? Except for there's a huge guy holding a camera on his shoulder standing in front of him, he's like, what is some kind of show? Where is it? Where is it? It's a show.

[Bald Brian]

Is there a camera inside that camera?

[Gina Grad]

Oh, boy, the good old days. Anyway, yeah, let's get the burka going. And my son is wildly pragmatic and does not want an earring.

[Bald Brian]

What do you guys think about the parents who give the earrings to the daughters while they're infants? You know, got it over with. It's.

[Gina Grad]

I think. I don't like that because I feel like it's mutilating the kid without it being their Consent. Even though I have my ears pierced. That's a Latin culture Y kind of thing.

[Skip Bedell]

Look at this.

[Gina Grad]

And they get their ears pierced and they're like three. I'll tell you, between that and calling them mama, you're just begging for a teenage pregnancy again. It's that thing of, like, why are you decorating your kid? What else? You know, it does indicate gender. Well, so it makes it easier to tell. Yeah, I just. I. Again, it just. It ain't to me. It doesn't move anyone's needle. Like, there's no guy that ever looks at a chick and is making his decision based on what's hanging or not hanging from her ears. It's not that we're not aesthetically oriented. It's just that's not the part.

[Bald Brian]

Neither here nor there.

[Gina Grad]

I'll put it to you this way. You could get a close up of Susan Boyle's earlobe.

[Bald Brian]

Slow down.

[Gina Grad]

No, I'm just saying if you took the earlobe and then you could just find the most. I don't know who you find the most beautiful woman on the planet. Name an actress.

[Bald Brian]

Allison Rosen.

[Gina Grad]

There you go. Now you're back in your good graces. You get Allison Rosen's earlobes. I have to remove the headphones. And then you go, okay, there's Elle McPherson's earlobe and there's Susan Boyle's earlobe. But a very tight shot. No guy would know which earlobe he was beating off to or if it was the correct one.

[Bald Brian]

Better do them both, just to be safe.

[Gina Grad]

I always play it safe. That's right. Always enough for both loes. All right. Should we do a little Baldiwood?

[Skip Bedell]

Yeah.

[Gina Grad]

Hooray for Baldwood. He will tell you if a movie's good. Brian will review the flicks that he's seen about on the big screen or in his Netflix Q. Before you spend bucks, remember his taste sucks. He loved that train wreck piece of shit. Transform us to Hooray for B.

[Bald Brian]

Good response to last week when I did a video pick people seem to like. Enough said. A lot of people tweeted me and saying thanks for the pick. Watched it on a date night with the wife or whatever. And thanks for the pick. So nothing interesting in theaters. I don't want to see Transcendence. I don't want to see the Other Woman. I don't have any interest. So another video pic.

[Gina Grad]

The Other Woman feels like a 90s movie, doesn't it?

[Bald Brian]

Wasn't there a movie? Speaking of Latin culture, wasn't there a movie called Chasing Poppy. That was almost the same thing. The three women who found out they were dating the same guy. I think there was like this almost exact same movie 10, 12 years ago.

[Gina Grad]

Oh, yeah, there was. And there always used to be one of those movies that Diane Keaton would be in with her friends where it was like three of them and it was like one dude. And there was a lot of that. Yeah, there's a lot of that.

[Bald Brian]

So we'll do a video pic this week. Is it streaming on both Netflix and Amazon Prime? So if you're an Amazon prime member, you can stream it for free.

[Gina Grad]

Hold on. Has anyone dressed more like a lesbian and not been a lesbian than Diane Keaton?

[Bald Brian]

Oh, wow. The iconic Annie hall thing.

[Gina Grad]

So he's wearing like the slacks and the in the vest and stuff like that.

[Bald Brian]

Maybe Paul Poundstone.

[Gina Grad]

Maybe. I'm just saying, like Ellen's Ellen. But that's Ellen. But Dan Keaton wears like weird big brim hats and pants all the time and not a lesbian, as far as I know. I thought Paul Poundstone was, though.

[Bald Brian]

I don't think she's out. I don't know for a fact, but Keeping up images perceptions. Yes, this is. Remember our recent guest, Gavin McInnes from Vice? He founded Vice magazine. He did a movie called how to Be a Man. And there's Diane Keaton. Oh, dressed like a man.

[Gina Grad]

Dressed like Charlie Chaplin.

[Bald Brian]

Well, she may have watched how to Be a Man. That is Gavin movie. Remember he came in here and mentioned it. He's a movie called how to Be a Man. It came out last year. It's directed by Chad Harbold and Gavin co wrote it. He also stars in it. Like I said, streaming on Netflix and Amazon. So Gavin was in here. Found it to be an interesting guest. I didn't know a lot about him. What'd you guys think of it? Did he leave an impression or. I thought he was an interesting guy.

[Gina Grad]

At a lot of opinions.

[Bald Brian]

Opinions.

[Gina Grad]

Look, I thought he was provocative for the sake of being provocative a little bit. But on the other hand, he was a smart guy. And yes, what'd he beat on Montreal? Because I fucking went over there and found that place annoying as well. And I found the people annoying as well. And I was glad to find a guy who was from that place that was calling those people sort of pretentious, obnoxious, and annoying, but go ahead.

[Bald Brian]

So he made an independent movie called how to Be a Man. It's on Netflix now. And I tracked it down because he was an interesting guy and I'm like, well, see what this guy's all about? And I kind of want to see the movie. Movie. He plays a guy with an unborn child who learns he's got terminal cancer. And he sort of makes a video with the help of this young kid. Oh, these are all sort of the.

[Gina Grad]

Other Woman spin, or I guess Gary just distracting.

[Bald Brian]

I appreciate that. So it's sort of I. Autobiographical plays a guy named Mark McCarthy, sort of in the same way the Hammer was maybe a little autobiographical, drawn from a lot of your experiences and whatnot. It actually reminds me a lot of the Hammer, not so much in content, but in the way, I think a lot of people went into the Hammer expecting one thing because they think they. I know Adam Cruella. I know what to expect. And they got a very sweet movie, what is ultimately a very sweet romantic comedy for all intents and purposes. And while this movie is nothing like that, it really surprised me. I enjoyed it quite a bit. I found it very funny. I found him. I don't want. This is gonna sound insulting, but I found him shockingly good, because I just thought he was Gavin McInnes, the guy who was the writer and the. Whatever guy, the provocateur. He's a really good actor, and I thought he was quite good in this.

[Gina Grad]

Wow. Well, you saw this, too? I saw it, too, yeah. There's a thing where. Well, if you're good at this, how could you possibly be good at that as well? How could you be a good writer and a good. This, a good actor, especially acting and makes so much about acting? Why not? It would stand to reason. It'd probably be the opposite way. I would probably. You know, we do this thing. We hold acting up as if it's. It's a much taller order than it is, number one. Number two, the real reason I know it from doing this movie, Allison does, from just her thin slice of being in it. You go out, you do a take, and you go, that one stunk. And then you come back and you do another take, and you feel. You can feel it. You go, oh, that one was a much better take. And then somewhere around the fifth one, you go, oh, that was the one. And then that's the one we use. So is Allison Rosen a good actor? I don't know. That take is good. We use that. I mean, you wouldn't want us to use your first one. Oh, no. And you wouldn't want us to use the one where, you know, halfway into it, like, oh, this one sucks.

[Bald Brian]

Right.

[Gina Grad]

Because that happens all the time. You get halfway into your take and you're like, well, this is. I should just stop. And that's. But then there's the good one. And as long as you get. You don't get to do that when you're on Broadway. You don't get to do that in a four camera sitcom, particularly. You have to go out there and just kind of push it out and do it. You don't get to do that on stage, you don't get to do it with stand up, you don't get to do it with a podcast. But you do get to do it when you're making a movie. And thus it makes that process much easier.

[Bald Brian]

Yeah. And like I said, like Allison said, I found Gavin to be very charismatic. I could see him being like the wacky friend in a romantic, you know, romantic comedy, kind of more mainstream movie. I love the wife character. I thought she was smart and realistic. Very independent feel, though. I want to warn everyone, this is not for everyone. Netflix users, they can select words to describe the movie and the words become this movie is. And one of the words is raunchy. And it is pretty in your face and raunchy and a little blue. So it's not for everyone.

[Gina Grad]

There's some full frontal.

[Bald Brian]

There is some full frontal. You see a dick in the first 30 seconds. So if that's your thing, it could.

[Gina Grad]

Have just been your own reflection from the TV screen.

[Bald Brian]

That makes so much more sense now. Yeah, some stuff done for shock value. Obligatory blah, blah, blah. A lot of material, you know, you can tell. Drawing from his stand up. That said, very surprised by this movie. I liked it a lot. You can stream it. Doesn't cost you nothing. There's at least one great laugh in this movie. So check it out. I liked it a lot.

[Gina Grad]

Title, one more time, how to Be a Man. I went, as I said a few weeks ago, went and saw Jon Favreau's new film that he did, wrote, directed and blah, blah, blah, Phil Rosenthal's House. And it was a nice story about a nice guy who was trying to get reconnected with his son and drove a lunch truck, got a food truck going, and blah, blah, blah. And then at the end during the Q and A, he was like, well, you know, we do have, we did get a soft R. So it's R. And that's going to hurt things a little bit for us. And again, if it's a kind of a thing where your first impulse as a person that just got done watching this movie was, is what this is an R rating this movie with no violence and no nudity. And I don't remember if there was an F word. When F words are done in context, they don't jump out at you, so you don't really remember them. If everyone in the room's first impulses are what for? Then somebody, the mpaa, has done a horrible fucking job of giving assigning a movie a designation. They just have. They're not doing what the public needs them to do. What the public wants is they want to know, should I take my child to this movie? Or I'm easily offended by graphic nudity or violence. That's what we need to know. Your arbitrary fucking assignments of letters are not helping us. Now, this movie, this Favreau movie, was the exact same as the Hammer. There's no nudity, no violence, other than Olympic style boxing, amateur boxing, and barely any language or content, yet it gets an R rating. Well, because they do this motherfucking thing, which should be illegal, by the way. They go to you, look, you got an R. And you know, what can we do about that R? And they go, well, you got two fucks in your movie. Now, I don't know why you shouldn't be able to do a kind of an Al Gore thing where you buy carbon credits where you go, okay, but I saw some PG13 movies where 130 people died in the first five minutes. I didn't kill anyone in my movie. Can I get a couple of fuck credits? I like that. Bring that one home with me with my Burke ID and my fuck credits. Good news, honey, Burke isn't fuck credits. No, what I'm saying is, okay, so you can have a movie where you're literally just seeing bodies being bulldozed into a mass grave. And that could be PG13 because none of the bodies are yelling fuck as they're being pushed into the mass grave. But I say fuck twice. And then they do this one. They go, you want your PG13? Remove one of the fucks. And now it's like, pardon the pun, you're fucking with my art here by telling me what I can and can't do so I can get the right thing from you guys who get to come down from your mountain and give me a fucking grade on my movie. This Favreau thing is like, you'd watch it and go, I have no idea who would ever be offended by this heartwarming story about a guy in his lunch truck and his Latin buddy and getting back in touch with his kid. But no, he made the mistake of Saying fuck in an hour and 55 minute movie. He said fuck two and a half times. And now he's got his R again. Bodies all over the place in every other movie. Doesn't matter. You should be able to get those credits. What I'm saying now is me and Kevin Hansch, who did the Hammer, were like, what the fuck are we gonna rate it? R. The best part is when it would show up on cable and they do the rated R. And then I'd go, they don't have to tell you why. I was like, please tell me why. Tell me why this fucking movie's rated R. It'd be like adult situation language, violence language. First off, boxing is a sanctioned Olympic sport.

[Bald Brian]

It's on TV during the day. Yes.

[Gina Grad]

And it's not violence. There's no violence. There's no violence. So what is it? What is it now? They have to wrap their R. They have to justify their retarded R rating. But we, Kevin Hench is like, fuck that. We're going to earn our fucking R rating this time. And now it's a lot of F bombs and boobies. Fuck it.

[Bald Brian]

Nice. Embrace it.

[Gina Grad]

If you're going to get the R, at least fucking earn the R. Because otherwise it's essentially like you being suspended for throwing a can in the trash can instead of the recycling can. You want to get suspended? Take a swing at a teacher.

[Bald Brian]

Yeah, earn it.

[Gina Grad]

Earn it. So fucking earning it now. But it still seems fucked up, right, that they're allowed just to go, here's your thing. And now our R movie just gets tossed in with all our movies. And the first question everyone asks about the Hammer is, why is it rated R? As if I had a fucking choice. And I do think you should be able to get credits like, okay, we do have two F bombs. Fine, no violence, no nudity.

[Bald Brian]

Otherwise, this is essentially a PG movie. Like, without the two fucks, it's essentially a family film.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, could. Without the two fucks it could be G rated. Like, I mean, there's nothing in it.

[Bald Brian]

But we talked about there's a documentary called this film is not yet rated. Sure, Come up on the show. Yes, great documentary about the process, the MPAA and the way they rate films. And it goes inside. It's a very secretive organization. It goes inside the room and as much as they can. And yeah, it's a really good documentary if you want to learn more about this.

[Gina Grad]

Well, what you learn is whether it's the MPAA or Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms or whatever, and you're making some Mangria. And you got to make a label anytime they don't have to answer to anybody other than you got an R. How's the appeal process work? We are the appeals process and it doesn't exist. So fuck off. Anytime you go, I'm going to come out with Mangria. So here's my thing. Oh, it's peach and a pear. And watch out, lady boys, it packs a punch. Oh no. Reject it. And you go, why? They go, why? They become like fucking leaders in banana republics. They become dictators. Like, this is where everything goes south. Cuz they just get to go, we have no competition. Our word is final. If we reject whatever it is, your movie or your wine label, well, go fuck yourself. Your answer is, it never comes out. You don't get to sell your wine, you don't get to have a movie. When did any good ever come of that? When did somebody never abuse that power? When did there become a very well laid out appeals process that was fair and evenly balanced in that environment? It never fucking worked. You give somebody supreme power, they just go ahead and get drunk with it. They say whatever the fuck they want. And before you know, it's like, look, you give the fucking guys a credit card, you go, we'll pay the bill. You use it sparingly. Before you know it, they're fucking at Spago's for lunch every day. That's it. That's how it works. It just fucking start now. If there were two MPAs and they had to compete with each other and they got paid accordingly and they felt somebody nipping at their heels, and there's a process of appeal. And by the way, if there was a process where if they unjustly gave you an R, then they had to recompensate you for whatever they, whatever it was, if there was any kind of check and balance consequences at all other than no. And that's what it is. You want to come out with a booze, you write a label. You write something on the label. They check it, they reject it. They don't tell you why, they just tell you no. And then you go home and write something else. And they'll, they'll look at it again and they'll get back to you in a month. When has that ever fucking worked out? And why did we decide that this is how it should be? And then when do we all just fucking go Ruby rich on these motherfuckers and go, fuck you when there'll ever.

[Bald Brian]

Be competition for the ratings board? I can't.

[Gina Grad]

Well, There for. There needs to be a process. I mean, it's a pretty simple process. Here's the appeal. We take 12, folks, just like a jury. Just select a jury. Just get your peers. Get a slice of life. 12 people put them in a room, they watch the movie. Then at the end they get a piece of paper. Check a box. G, PG, PG 13. R. PG R 17. Whatever. X. You check the box, whatever. The majority of what that slice of life checked, that's your rating. I like that.

[Bald Brian]

That'd be such a good way to do it, right?

[Gina Grad]

So you do the hammer. It'd be PG and then that'd be that. Or maybe it'd be PG 13. NC 17. It would not be. That's the point. Then down the people smoking instead of random arbitrary fuck stick deciding to do whatever they want, counting the fucks. What year is it, by the way, with the Fox?

[Bald Brian]

Well, he said fuck sticks. You only get one more.

[Gina Grad]

Just saying, like, what year are we in with this? Yeah. What are we upholding? All right. Joe Quirk is out there. Yep. Written a bunch of interesting books, but also has a new one about sustainable cities at sea. I like this. Well, I don't know, 70% of the Earth's ocean. Right.

[Bald Brian]

Let's get out there.

[Gina Grad]

All right. Author Joe Cork in studio. Got a book out or coming out with a book about seasteading how ocean cities are going to change the world. Written a few books, but the seasteading thing, interesting. What got you onto that?

[Skip Bedell]

Well, I'm a storyteller, and once I found out about all the people that are trying to build floating nations on the sea, I just got completely hooked and realized more people need to know about this.

[Gina Grad]

Who's all trying to do it.

[Skip Bedell]

I call them aqua preneurs. Maritime lawyers and environmentalists and people trying to create blue technologies.

[Gina Grad]

What's a blue technology?

[Skip Bedell]

A blue technology is better than green technology because green technology aspires to be sustainable. Blue technology is restorative. And a lot of people want to grow algae and seaweed farms on the sea and make the ocean environment better. They want to grow algae farms and absorb nutrient pollution, carbon pollution out of the water, transform that into biofuel and food. And I say, these guys plan to feed the world with greenhouse gas.

[Gina Grad]

Well, it's interesting that there's. I mean, every time they talk about, you know, the next frontier, they go, oh, it's not space, it's the sea. The sea's what we've just begun to explore, what that's capable of. We're capable of and what secrets it hides. And they start getting into all the different life forms in there and all the qualities they have and how that could pertain to us. And cancer and whatever the million different things. Million different things. And people are starting to figure that stuff out. Except for horseshoe crabs, which have nothing to offer whatso fucking ever. They're worthless.

[Skip Bedell]

They've survived since the dinosaurs. They didn't know what they're doing. Robert Ballard, he's the guy who discovered the Titanic and the Bismarck. He's an oceanographer. He just tears his hair out. Why are we focusing on going to space when we can go to the ocean? It's easier to float than to fly. It's easier to create sea stations than space stations.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah.

[Skip Bedell]

I mean, we can build floating cities on the water. We can engage the power of the sea to turn around global warming, to de acidify the ocean, to create energy, to create algal fuels, biofuels based on algae, basically to replace oil. I mean, once seasteading was proposed, it attracted all sorts of different kinds of people to try to solve problems by using the power of the ocean.

[Gina Grad]

What is the number one thing in terms of what the ocean can provide, in terms of where we're at from a technological standpoint today that we're sort of ignoring that we should be much further along in this department and we're not. What would that this be?

[Skip Bedell]

I mean, so many people talk about, you know, we're dumping CO2 into the atmosphere. Osun acidity is getting much worse as it absorbs all the carbon from the atmosphere. You know, fish populations are being depleted. So what's the solution? We need to stop humanity, we need to stop progressing. We need to lower populations. That is not the solution. We need to engage the power of the sea so that the human economy is based on nature's bioeconomy. And if you get floating nations on the sea, you know, half the world, nearly half the oceans of the planet's surface is unclaimed by existing governments.

[Gina Grad]

Really?

[Skip Bedell]

Yeah.

[Gina Grad]

So you just, you get X amount of miles off of your shore and then you become international water.

[Skip Bedell]

Yeah. In some cases 12 miles. You're basically outside the jurisdiction of existing governments and you can do new things like gamble.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. There's enough gambling barges off of Santa Monica. Yeah.

[Skip Bedell]

And now people are interested in making floating hospital ships that can provide cheaper care.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Skip Bedell]

That's what I'm very interested in.

[Gina Grad]

Well, somebody, do not worry. The man, pardon the pun, will figure out a way to wet his beak like Somebody said, well, what's international waters? Like about 7 miles off or 12 miles off of Santa Monica. Okay. Is gambling legal in Los Angeles? No. All right, we'll build a floating casino. That'll be. And then at a certain point, somebody said, no. Yeah. When the government gets beat on a technicality, it doesn't stay beat. It just changes a rule and catches back up to you again.

[Skip Bedell]

Well, cruise ships have already occupied this niche. I mean, they incorporate in one country, they hire from another country, they fly the flag of another country. They play this kind of jurisdictional arbitrage. So they play the lowest possible taxes. They hire from wherever they want. Rich people invest. Middle class people like me ride on cruise ships. People from the developing world work on cruise ships. Cruise ships in many ways are like independent entities, not associated with any particular government. And the oceans are a very sort of placid, polycentric system of laws that is ready for the next layer of legal evolution, which is sovereign mobile nations. And you can imagine if you get, you know, a thousand seasteads out there, basing their economies on biofuels based on algae, on food drawn from seaweed. A lot of us don't know we eat seaweed every day. It's in most of our products. It's in our toothpaste, it's in our beer. The seaweed would only scale up if it absorbs all sorts of carbon and nutrient pollution from the oceans, which would draw CO2 out of the atmosphere.

[Gina Grad]

So is this something? So it sounds great. And I like the idea of the floating nations. And I like the idea that there eventually there just be the gay floating nations, there'd be the black and the Mexican floating nations wouldn't get along that well. Be like a prison yard. Yeah, you get it. Maritime. Yeah. But who does not want this to happen? Because there's always somebody who says, not so fast. Like, who's against this Big. Who's the Ursula of this situation? Yes. Is it Big Fuel Big. Who doesn't want this to go down?

[Skip Bedell]

I don't think we've scaled up enough to an extent to really be threatening to any existing jurisdiction. But from the grassroots, there does seem to be people who just feel like you shouldn't be allowed to leave. You shouldn't be allowed to go somewhere else and try something new. And they sound like Europeans from the 17th century saying you shouldn't go to the giant life raft of the United States and try something new. What good could possibly come from that? This is the new frontier.

[Gina Grad]

Has anybody considered the technology involved with the Floating nations, I mean, the fact that they would be floating, they wouldn't.

[Skip Bedell]

Be anchored, they'd be floating and they'd be mobile and they'd be able to.

[Gina Grad]

Move around and they would be advanced enough to go if a typhoon was coming in or big weather front that they could pick up their anchors and move X amount of feet, X amount of miles away to avoid that, or they'd just be durable enough to deal with it. Is there any thought to that?

[Skip Bedell]

There's a lot of thought with that that you can just move out of the way. I mean, if you're a coastal nation, you're basically a sitting duck. Like a tornado or a hurricane is coming, there's nothing you can do about it.

[Gina Grad]

Right.

[Skip Bedell]

If you're a seastead, you can move out of the way.

[Gina Grad]

Right.

[Skip Bedell]

Mobile nations, it provides a kind of power. You can become sort of like hubs in the network of shipping industries.

[Gina Grad]

Right.

[Skip Bedell]

Japan already had like a floating airport in 2000. I mean all these technologies are moving forward to colonize the seas.

[Gina Grad]

Well, it's interesting in that again, with more than half the Earth's surface being ocean and in a world that gets more and more crowded, it just makes sense. And also the fact that the sea seems to. It's weird, but it's this incredible abundant life force that does it without us so much meaning. We're looking at Japan's floating airport now. Everything seems to grow without us having to till any soil or fertilize it or dump any water on it. It just kind of goes and goes and goes without us doing anything.

[Skip Bedell]

So imagine algae and seaweed farms. They require no fresh water, they require no soil. They build their biomass entirely on carbon and nutrient pollution which we land based people have dumped into the ocean. A lot of people are talking about peak phosphate. We're running out of phosphate. We're not running out of phosphate. We've dumped it into the oceans. Algae and seaweed absorb this stuff. Once the world's economy is based on nature's bioeconomy, we'll have a blue economy which will absorb nutrient pollution and carbon from the atmosphere, transform it into food and biofuel, and we'll have our. I'm not into a green civilization. I'm into a blue green civilization based on blue green algae.

[Gina Grad]

I've talked to. Sorry for cutting you off, but I talked to Gail Banks who's a sort of engineering genius who does, huh? Oh, you pussies. You don't know anything. Gale Banks is a guy.

[Bald Brian]

He sounds hot.

[Gina Grad]

He's an Old dude, but he's a mechanical genius. And they take all these, there's gale banks. He does tons of applications where they take these Humvees and they put them up in Afghanistan and they're up this high altitude, so they don't make a lot of power because the air is thin. You need the thickness of the air at sea level. And then they put a bunch of armor plating all over the side of them and they weigh them down with 3,000 pounds of armor plating. And now the things don't move. So he does a lot of turbocharging work and a lot of mapping and a lot of computer shit. And he gets those engines to work through cooling and intercooling and turbocharging. And that's what he did on my dually. He's a mechanical genius. But the point is, I talk to him all the time about diesel algae and vertical diesel algae and turning it into diesel fuel. And it just makes the most sense in the world that you take this never ending source, turn it into this diesel fuel and use it to power everything.

[Skip Bedell]

Yeah, I always tell people that fossil fuel doesn't come from the dinosaurs. Fossil fuel is mostly based on fossil algae. And there's all this. And we've already like screwed up the land and, you know, used up all this soil with our agriculture, dumped it into the seas. We have all this nutrient and carbon pollution in the waters, creating what's known as dead zones off our coasts. Many people interested in biofuel and algae food want to create seastead farms off the coast to absorb all this carbon and nutrient pollution, transform it into seaweed and algae and turn it into algal fuel and food.

[Gina Grad]

Allison, hold your questions. I know you had one. I jumped on it. I want to give a little love to Sherry's berries while we're living on the Earth, while we're. Who knows how much longer we have here saying let's get those berries while the sun is shining is what I'm saying. Spoil mom because again, she could be a homestead out in the Sea of Galilee this time next year. I mean, I'm not saying she's going.

[Bald Brian]

To be, but do you want to take that chance?

[Gina Grad]

I don't.

[Bald Brian]

Well, get on it then.

[Gina Grad]

You get on it one day. Only offer you can send mom beautiful bouquet of flowers, and next day she's going to get the fresh dipped strawberries delivered from Sherry's berries only $39.99. Berries dipped in white chocolate and milk chocolate and seaweed and algae. Oh, no. I Floated away on a raft of sustainable energy there. Chocolate chips, decorative swizzles, nuts, it's all there. They got an amazing deal. Visit B e r r I dashes.com that's berries.com. click on the microphone, top corner, type in ace, you get the deal. That's Sherry's Berries. Offer is good for today only. So let's hop on this bad boy, Sherry's Berries.

[Bald Brian]

Now I'm excited for our future sponsor, Sherry's Kelp. Yes, that's going to be good.

[Gina Grad]

What was your question that I stepped on a million years ago? That's okay.

[Bald Brian]

My question.

[Gina Grad]

So I feel like I'm understanding about 65% of what you're saying. People of your ilk who want to harness the power of the sea. Where does something like Fukushima come in? Is that a concern?

[Skip Bedell]

Well, it's funny, people are already, MIT just did a study where they're proposing very aggressively that we need floating nuclear power plants. People say, oh, that's crazy. But it's actually crazy to put them on land. You have an earthquake, you're crushed. If you're out in the ocean, you know, there's just no effect from an earthquake. That's actually safer on the ocean.

[Bald Brian]

But is the idea of a radioactive.

[Gina Grad]

Spill, should someone like me be afraid.

[Bald Brian]

Of the idea of all this radiation.

[Gina Grad]

Spilling into the ocean? Or is the ocean so big and vast that it doesn't matter?

[Skip Bedell]

Well, you have to ask, why would the radiation spill into the ocean if earthquakes have no effect?

[Gina Grad]

She's talking about Fukushima.

[Bald Brian]

Yeah, I'm talking about what I am Fukushima.

[Skip Bedell]

And I would tell you about the biggest technology with seasteading involves otec, which is ocean thermal energy conduction, which is a green renewable source of energy that people are proposing. And so basically if you have, we use a form of OTEC every day, whether it's your refrigerator or the engine in your car or your air conditioner. If you have two different temperatures in one machine, you can create harvestable energy. If you think really big and you sent a thousand foot pipe down into the deep, from the tropical warm water to the deep ocean water, you have a temperature difference of like 20 or 30 degrees celtigrade. You can harvest a tremendous amount of electricity from this which can not only power an ocean nation, but provide enough electricity for the land based nations of the world. There's Lockheed Martin is very seriously involved in this. Rainwood Group in China. China is very interested in this. Imagine if Saudi Arabia was the size of an ocean and you don't need a drill, you just need a pipe. I understand. I'm going over this very quickly, but there's all sorts of ocean technologies that people just don't think about. If you name an issue that people are concerned about, I can tell you about an aquapreneur who's trying to solve it through cc.

[Gina Grad]

Passion fruit iced tea.

[Skip Bedell]

Passion fruit iced tea. Is this an issue?

[Bald Brian]

This is kind of scourge.

[Gina Grad]

Pretty big land based one for me. Yeah, yeah. They used to just have regular iced tea and now it's all passion fruit.

[Skip Bedell]

Well, I'd like to see algae tea.

[Bald Brian]

Oh, now we're getting back to basics.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. And a good tight end.

[Bald Brian]

Everyone was underrated.

[Skip Bedell]

Everyone in this room is eating algae today. We don't even realize it. Algae is used in like, the fertilizers that nourish our foods. It's in our toothpaste, it's in our beer. It's probably in your Mangria.

[Gina Grad]

Oh.

[Skip Bedell]

Algae is used in all sorts of foodstuffs we use. Algae just completely permeates civilization.

[Gina Grad]

It's at the bottom of my coffee maker.

[Skip Bedell]

It's in the paint on this table. It's in glues, it's in dyes.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, yeah. So if it's all out there, why don't we just get out there and get going? Like imagine if we spent on the exposure, exploration and the technology of the ocean what we've spent on the space programs in the last 40 years.

[Skip Bedell]

Are you intentionally quoting from Robert Ballard, discoverer of the Titanic, who in his TED Talk said, why are we wasting billions on trying to get space stations going with 1/100th of the price? We can get a sea station going and a new nation to create a better government busted than the clusterfuck we have now.

[Gina Grad]

That's that stone bear in that Seth MacFarlane movie, Ted. Because if that's what we're talking about, then yes. Yeah, I just feel like we don't have an unlimited amount of time and resources. We have problems. We should work big to small. I know everyone thinks. I know. We're enamored with outer space. There's something about going and touching the face of God or something like there's something about it being out there. And man has always stared up into the skies at night and said what if? But the ocean felt boring. That's where the smelly shit comes from that you eat. And who wants to go there? And that's where you go take a piss. But it's not nearly as glamorous, but practically much better. Time and money spent right here. I mean, you're talking to one of the few guys that like the water world. That's how strongly I feel about this whole thing.

[Skip Bedell]

Seasteaders plan to avoid the water world scenario, but the bioshock, well, the smokers.

[Gina Grad]

Are out there riding those jet skis and smoking cigarettes. By the way, if you live in the ocean, you'll probably not smoke. That'd just be tougher. It's a taller order.

[Bald Brian]

We'll see.

[Gina Grad]

All right. We'll find out. Allison normally does news, but we just been talking our way right through it.

[Bald Brian]

I got the bioshock reference.

[Gina Grad]

They don't know what you're talking about.

[Skip Bedell]

Love Boat, you old fucks.

[Gina Grad]

Love Boat.

[Skip Bedell]

Love Boat. Do you get it now?

[Gina Grad]

I love the Love Boat.

[Skip Bedell]

Yeah, we want to create Love Boat.

[Gina Grad]

Where do you see it? Let's just go 25 years in the future. Not in any utopian future, but if things just keep going as they're going, or the folks that you've spent spoken about are kind of on their A game. Where do you think we'll be in 25 years?

[Skip Bedell]

In 25 years, I'd like to see a diversity of nations on the sea recognized by the United Nations. You got your socialist seastead. You got your anarcho capitalist seastead. You have the seasteads instantiating ideas that we haven't thought of and have not been considered, that some freak out there is thinking of some Benjamin Franklin. And we have multiple floating nations out there that compete for citizens. And we have a market of competing governments where on land, we have a monopoly of governments where they just kind of claim monopoly control over you. They tax you out the ass. There's nothing you can do about it, right? If you have houseboats on the sea, if you can float, you can detach from your government, join another government. You get pissed off, you can just leave and go somewhere else.

[Gina Grad]

You become like Hollywood making films. Like, you just sit. You sit around and you go, well, we're not gonna film in LA because we're tired of being raped by the government. Then Louisiana comes over and goes, hey, come on over and do your shit over here. And then North Carolina goes, whoa, whoa, not so fast. You got things to offer, too. And now you got suitors, multiple suitors, and they're trying to lure your dinghy over to their berth.

[Skip Bedell]

This is the key idea of seasteading, and I think I'm about to convert you to a seasteading.

[Gina Grad]

Listen, I love this idea. You know what it is? Honestly? You hear These stories where it's like, well, California, think about relaxing their taxes on filmmaking because of the flight and whatever. And it's like, good. That's right. Right. Because Louisiana forced us to get our shit together because everyone got on a fucking airplane and went, fuck you, California, you're greedy. Without Louisiana and without Canada and without Prague and without whatever, do you think California would be reconsidering their taxation of these film crews that are leaving town every fucking day to go shoot somewhere else? Of course they wouldn't be reconsidering shit, they'd be raising the shit. But now they have to get their shit together because we're going to Louisiana. Fuck you, California.

[Skip Bedell]

Yes.

[Gina Grad]

And they forced them to get their shit together. I like it.

[Skip Bedell]

Yes. I mean, human beings are selfish.

[Gina Grad]

Yes. They're pieces of floating shit.

[Skip Bedell]

They're pieces of floating shit. And if you accept that, then you accept that competition to serve others, competition to profit by serving others is what makes things better.

[Gina Grad]

Yes. It forces you to get your shit together.

[Skip Bedell]

Yes. And if I have a monopoly, if you have a monopoly over all podcasts and no one else is allowed to make a podcast, you're free to suck as much as you want, but you try to be as entertaining as possible because other people are competing to take your shit away from you. And we seasteaders want to apply that to governance. That's the key idea of seasteading.

[Gina Grad]

Ooh, I like this.

[Skip Bedell]

We want competitive governance out on the water. Because the ocean is fundamentally liquid, is fundamentally different from land. You know, you're born into a government, they claim monopoly control over you, they tax you out the ass, they give you shitty services. There's nothing you can do about it. You can move among states, but you can't go to another nation without and take them with you.

[Gina Grad]

Well, if you're from Cuba, you can't do anything about it, depending on what system and where you're born. But there's not a lot you can do about it depending on what side of the Berlin Wall you're born on.

[Skip Bedell]

Yes, but if you're on the ocean, you can float. You're mobile. Nations can only form if people choose to attach to each other.

[Gina Grad]

I like it. And thus it forces you to get your shit together, it forces governments to.

[Skip Bedell]

Be like a company, and it allows citizens to be like customers.

[Gina Grad]

That's right.

[Skip Bedell]

And then they'll compete to please us.

[Gina Grad]

A dinghy in every garage and a squid in every pot. That's what I say. Ah. You know what else I love? DraftKings, baby. My listeners winning crazy money. DraftKings.com America's favorite one day fantasy baseball site. Do not miss this. One guy put in 11 bucks, won 4,000 bucks. Another guy got 100 grand. First time out, first time ever. Someone even won a million bucks at DraftKings last season. Baldy, I know you got a couple of big time $2 bets.

[Bald Brian]

That's right. Try and turn them into big, big money. I'm actually not doing so bad now that Garrett Richards having a decent game for the Angels. So clawing my way back into it.

[Gina Grad]

Easy one day fantasy baseball. No season long commitments, no being stuck with players, just instant cash every day. DraftKings Dawson DraftKings has a huge contest coming up. Over 3 million bucks in cash prizes with a million for first place and you can score free entry. Enter [e-mail] for your free shot at hundreds, thousands, even a million bucks free spots are going quick. Enter adam [e-mail] DraftKings.com Joe, I like you because we're simpatico on this whole part about competition. I keep telling people all the time you can't just ask people to do the right thing. You have to give them a little incentive stuff they may not even know. I don't know why we think people, the government or anyone's going to do the right thing without the incentive and the competition that forces it. And this whole seasteading thing, man, that just takes it to a whole new strata that is just absolutely amazing. I love that. I just love that idea. The book is going to be published in about a year or so. Do we know?

[Skip Bedell]

2015, I expect.

[Gina Grad]

And until then, if we want to check up on you, we can go to joequirk.com youm can go to joequirk.com or seasteading.org I just love that idea. All right, us all over the place. New York, San Francisco, Irvine, Pasadena, Phoenix, Richmond, Virginia. Some of it standup shows, some of it live podcasts, some book stuff. So come by, go to AdamColl.com and find out when me or we are coming to a city near you. My book. Present me pre order it on Amazon, look at the New York Times bestseller list once again and fund anything.com patentroll thank you in advance for saving podcasting. So until next time, Adam Carolla for Joe Quirk, Allison Rosen and Bald Ryan. Say it.

[Skip Bedell]

Mahalo love boat. You old fucking.

[Bald Brian]

All right, that's Adam Krilla Show 1314. Coming up next we have Adam Krilla Show 1599. This one's featuring Skip and Allison Bedell, Travis Corkery, Gina Grad, and Brian Bishop. And this one's from 2015.

[Skip Bedell]

This is Gina's first year on the podcast. This is after Catch Contractor has ended. Kind of a post mortem deep dive.

[Bald Brian]

On the show Skip and Allison.

[Skip Bedell]

Hope you guys enjoy Pluto TV is.

[Gina Grad]

The place for movie fans like me.

[Allison Rosen]

And TV fans like me.

[Gina Grad]

They've got something for everyone and it's totally free.

[Allison Rosen]

You can binge laugh out loud sitcoms.

[Gina Grad]

Like Frasier and rewatch cult classics like Higher Learning. Whether you're in the mood to solve.

[Bald Brian]

A little crime before bedtime with NCIS.

[Gina Grad]

Or Tracker, or curl up with a.

[Bald Brian]

Surefire hit like Forrest Gump.

[Gina Grad]

Run Forrest. Pluto TV has thousands of movies and shows, shows all for free. Pluto TV Stream now pay Never. I want to do a quick correction. I said on Friday's show that I had dinner with Bill Simmons and he was going to come on in September and talk a bunch of shit about espn. Just to be clear, because I'd had a couple of drinks. He said he was going to come on in September after his ESPN contract was up. And we're going to talk about a lot of shit. I don't want people to think he's going to foul mouth espn. Good day, Gina Graham. Good day to you, Ball. Brian.

[Bald Brian]

Daddy, stop talking. It's Father's Day, for God's sake.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. Travis Corkey. Oh, sorry, Corkery. There you go. Is here from Alaska. He has no microphone. My kids have taken over the microphone. We'll give Travis. We'll play greater than, Less than in a second, Skip and Allison. But Dell will be in here. Lots of stuff to talk about on Father's Day. All right, kids? Yeah.

[Bald Brian]

Make the magic happen.

[Gina Grad]

Make the magic happen. All right. What was Father's Day like for you and Daddy? Good. Okay. Okay. And what did you do today with Daddy? We went to the racetrack with you. Mm. In beautiful Fontana, California. Yeah. And did you help Daddy? Yeah. Yeah. And then tonight we go to Phil Rosenthal's house. Yeah. And we watch Jurassic World.

[Bald Brian]

Their faces lit up the racetrack, Daddy.

[Travis Corkery]

Whatever.

[Gina Grad]

They got dragged to a movie.

[Bald Brian]

They could see it literally multiple times a day at any theater.

[Gina Grad]

Got dragged to Fawn Tucky. Daddy pulled out Paul Newman's Camaro, which was probably in the movie as a. And this started seven minutes too early. It started a little early, yeah. Fontana, by the way, Yesterday was about 106 degrees.

[Bald Brian]

I was gonna say Vegas is 114, and that's kind of halfway.

[Gina Grad]

And Fontana Speedway's Nothing but blacktop. And people do not factor in the trees and grass like they should when it comes to the blacktop.

[Bald Brian]

A natural cooling, right?

[Gina Grad]

Oh, my God. Well, you know that thing, just that thing where they go. Well, it's a. It's, you know, it's 96 degrees, but on the field it's 104.

[Bald Brian]

Right.

[Gina Grad]

At least the field's made of fucking grass. This is asphalt. And everything is black except for the fans. And it is, ironically enough, hotter than hell.

[Bald Brian]

Does that affect the speeds at all?

[Gina Grad]

No, you're actually. Your tires get stickier, which is good because you're cornering. Yeah. Better. Yes, it's better. You try to figure out how many pounds to put in the tire because it'll. They'll start expanding once they start heating up.

[Travis Corkery]

But I'm sure you can just flip the air on in the car. Right.

[Gina Grad]

You can see a picture of the tires Chris, Max, Pata took. They start getting liquid after a while. But the car. Here's how hot the inside of my car was. Where's Max Apata? 115 degrees. I have a trackmate system on my phone where you can just push an app and it'll keep track of how many laps and how fast and average speed and blah, blah, blah. The phone is inside the car. Not under the glass or anything, just right next to me on the transmission tunnel, but up on a lifted pivoting thing that you can get on the Internet. You know, it glues down. It's a base, and then it has a holder.

[Bald Brian]

Yeah, like a holder.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, it's a holder, but it's not. It's not like strapped to the transmission or anything. It's up 2 inches. Yeah. And it's not in the sunlight. It's just sitting next to me. And there's no windows in the car, per se. I mean, the wind is flowing through the car quite freely. Isn't there like an open window, though? But they still have, like, the strap things. There's an open window. The front. There's a front windshield and there's a rear glass, but there's no side glass.

[Bald Brian]

But that wind that's blowing in is 106 degree wind.

[Gina Grad]

Yes. The phone made it a convection oven. The phone made it three laps before it shut down.

[Bald Brian]

Yeah.

[Travis Corkery]

Oh, wow.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, it's whatever that heat is inside your car when you forget and leave it on the dash at the Costco in September and Van Nuys. That was the heat inside the car except for the long johns, the fire suit and the gloves and the Helmet and the hoodie and everything else you're wearing. The phone actually shut itself down.

[Bald Brian]

Yeah.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. It was, like, even. Almost, like, hot to touch.

[Bald Brian]

Like, you could barely hold the thing.

[Gina Grad]

And you see that. You know that screen that says your phone overheated?

[Bald Brian]

Basically, you cannot use your phone for X number of minutes until it cools.

[Gina Grad]

Off out of the sun. Just the actual ambient heat inside of the car. And you couldn't even. The stick shift knob was metal, and you couldn't even touch it. Having you. Yeah. Let's hear about the heartache. Remember the time that I went to how to catch a contractor with you without Natalia? And that time it was 109 degrees. Yeah. We were going to Corona. I'm pulling on my I iPad. And then. And then it got. It got, like, so hot. And then. And then it said.

[Bald Brian]

And then it popped up and it.

[Gina Grad]

Said, iPad needs to shut down.

[Bald Brian]

You.

[Gina Grad]

It's too hot.

[Allison Rosen]

Needs to cool off before you can use Sunny.

[Gina Grad]

When you run into a holocaust survivor, I want you to have that story chambered. What's a holocauster?

[Bald Brian]

Well, they experienced a hot prime.

[Gina Grad]

For the love of God, star, you think you know pain, you think you know anguish, you think you know heartache, and then launch into that.

[Bald Brian]

Okay, I have a question for the kids. Do you think you might be scared tonight for Jurassic World? It's a pretty intense movie. PG. 13. I'm scared. Yeah. Sonny defiantly not scared. Can I talk to Sonny afterwards?

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, he'll be scared. He doesn't go on roller coasters. No, he does not.

[Bald Brian]

Now imagine the roller coaster could eat you.

[Gina Grad]

It's gonna be good. All right, Max Apata. We. We ripped off the race. So this is Newman's Camaro, which I've never raced before, and it's. I don't think this car's been raced since. Well, it may have raced a little bit after Newman, but not much. It's been a good decade since this car has raced. The hose, you see, sort of hooked up is to try to blow any kind of air at me, but all the air is 102 degrees outside. But anyway, you can. You can take a look at what it looks like from my standpoint.

[Bald Brian]

It's all metal around you. I mean, like, obviously metal, but, like, unfinished.

[Gina Grad]

Give me a little sound, Chris. Let's hear that engine kind of wave to the corner workers. You gotta have rolling that coffee so they start it. You gotta wait for the green flag.

[Travis Corkery]

You're bouncing around pretty good.

[Gina Grad]

It hasn't started yet. Now it's on now it's on. So this is Fontana. It's the big oval. You have to figure out how hard you want to hit the bank because your tires aren't that hot yet. I'm not sure how sticky they're going to be if they beginning. So everyone, Everyone always wants to know, like, well, how fast you going, how fast, how fast, how fast, how fast? It's never. It's not really about how fast.

[Bald Brian]

Well, still impress us.

[Gina Grad]

It's your. Well, it's your average speed. What you want is your. Your average speed. Like passes slam. My average speed was 102. But you got to go around a lot of corners so that to average 102 miles an hour in a lot of corners means you have to get up fast for a while.

[Bald Brian]

What are you taking the corners at?

[Gina Grad]

No idea. It's just an average speed of 100, 102 or 117. But I did a faster lap than what we got in our session. Yeah, it's the shifting part that takes a little out of there. And you can see his phone at the very bottom middle of the screen. That's where his phone. Oh, I see it. And then you go in the infield, and then you go back up on the. Go back up on the beach. So you don't want to hit the guy in front of you, but you'd like to pass him if you can. And the, the things you see on the dashboard are the shift patterns, which are taped there because they're. They're different than all the cars. So I look at them to memorize with. Not memorized to see what. Cheat sheet. Yeah.

[Travis Corkery]

Is he intentionally boxing you out or he's just.

[Gina Grad]

No, he's just running his line. All right, you got it. Wow, that's like 111 degrees. Yeah. Daddy did spin out a little bit later during qualifying. That's right. He recovered. And then I started the race early today before Danny got out on the track. What happened, Chris? How hot is it sitting in that car in the sun? In Fontana, I wasn't even in the.

[Bald Brian]

Car, and I was dying out there.

[Gina Grad]

And how many layers of crap do you put on before you get in that car?

[Bald Brian]

Yeah, you have, like, the long johns, the thermal suit, the fire suit.

[Gina Grad]

I was barely wearing a T shirt, right. I was rolling up the sleeves. My whole plan was, I'm going to get out to the grid and not sit there for 10 minutes in that car.

[Bald Brian]

Smart.

[Gina Grad]

Right? Except for they started the race early.

[Bald Brian]

Because it was so hot.

[Gina Grad]

Ironically, there's an element of It's Sunday. Let's get the F out of here. That permeates almost every endeavor. And that was it. So I was like sitting inside my pit going, I'm not getting in this car until the last. The second. Because I spent. And they started. They started the trophy race early.

[Bald Brian]

Is this like your airplane policy where you don't want to get on to the last possible minute, turn around and bit you in the ass?

[Gina Grad]

It bit me in the ass.

[Bald Brian]

Because they decided to go early.

[Gina Grad]

The 2:00 Trophy race started at 1:55, which you should just shouldn't do. There's a time everyone's looking at their clocks, their phones. It's like they started early. So then I went out on the track and everyone else was driving already. And then it was just, what the hell? What are we doing here? But anyway, I got a bunch of seat time in in a Paul Newman car, which I've never driven before, so that's good. And a lot of folks around the track saw the documentary winning racing life of Paul Newman. So if you want to see that, go out and see that. Itunes, Amazon and all that business. And it is cool to drive his cars. Sonny. Yeah, he was with me yesterday. Yeah, he wanted a hot dog and we went to the hot dog place with no hot dogs. Let me explain how the monopoly versus competition works. The track is a giant place with one vendor. It's a humongoid. It could probably hold 200,000 human beings in one spot. But there is one snack shack and it's run by the elderly couple of color. And when we pull into the single snack shack with nobody there, I mean, it was. It was a light turnout. And I'm guessing it's because it was 113 degrees that day, but.

[Bald Brian]

And a holiday. Yeah.

[Gina Grad]

Well, holiday was today. This was yesterday. But holiday weekend, it was light. Like normally they're 30 guys in the B sedan group and my group would have 25 guys. It was just a lighter turnout than normal. There was nobody in the stands because nobody's going to sit up there and melt in the stands. It just.

[Bald Brian]

There's one less guy in your race today, right?

[Gina Grad]

Bunch of racers, extra light. Yeah, bunch of racers. And Sonny and I pull up to the snack shack at lunch.

[Bald Brian]

Not in a car.

[Gina Grad]

Lunch. Yeah. We walk up, sorry, lunch is at 12:30 or something like official track break lunch. And then it's like a prayer over the loudspeaker. I would argue that the prayer is more off putting than anything else.

[Bald Brian]

I would say that's the first I ever heard of that.

[Gina Grad]

Oh, no. They do the prayer at the.

[Bald Brian]

I mean, it makes sense, now that I think about it. This is a very.

[Travis Corkery]

What kind of prayer? How's that prayer?

[Gina Grad]

It's like, dear Lord, we pray for the safety of everybody. And all that does is tend to freak out the atheists. They don't do it in other events where they pray for Satan, then do it at bar mitzvahs and things like that. Yeah. You know what I'm saying?

[Bald Brian]

I know.

[Gina Grad]

The point is, is when. Look, you wouldn't want to take off in an airplane where there was, hey, dear Lord, we asked for traveling. Mercy. Like, I mean, you don't want. That doesn't. Wouldn't steal you with confidence.

[Bald Brian]

You're inviting. Yeah, you're inviting the bad juju. God's like, hey, that's a good idea. Let's take down that plane.

[Gina Grad]

No, what you're saying is, is we need a prayer, right? Shit could go wrong. I don't like the existence of why we need the prayer.

[Travis Corkery]

This sport goes against God's will, and we're hoping he has.

[Gina Grad]

Things could happen. Yeah, I don't like that prayer. But anyway, it's. It's the prayer. Sorry. Yeah, you're right.

[Bald Brian]

We've been on track.

[Gina Grad]

We went over there. What, about noon? Wasn't late. Yeah. 12, 13, like the middle of the day. Middle of the day. We went over there. There's nobody at the track. And I call it midday. Midday is what you call it. Write that down. And he should be credited with coming up with midday. And we go over there and we. Sonny, we're waiting in line. What do you want, Sonny? I want a hot dog. And there's like, two people in front of us want a hot dog, and two people after us want a hot dog. Go in. No hot dog. Out of hot dogs. Like, how are you out of hot dogs? Right? The day hasn't begun. And by the way, how can you fucking be out of hot dogs?

[Bald Brian]

One of those things you should be able to stockpile for perpetuity.

[Gina Grad]

We have Sunday. That's race day. That's tomorrow. Today's qualifying. You have a refrigerator, right? Go to the Costco and get the Chub pack of hot dogs and just have an extra 24 laying around and getting. The guy's like, yeah, everybody wanted a hot dog. And it's like, who's everybody? There's nobody here. There's really. Sonny, is there anyone at this track other than people who are racing and the folks that help the guys race? No, no, there's no rush on hot dogs. There's a bunch of old dudes driving Cobras and stuff like that. They're nobody. And it's before 1:00. It's before lunchtime. They're out.

[Bald Brian]

This should be the point where we have the most hot dogs.

[Gina Grad]

The couple behind us wanted the hot dog. You always have to. The knife gets turned when the next person in your within earshot, they pull up, oh, I have a couple of hot dogs, sir. We're out of hot dogs. So I was like, why are you out of. I'll tell you why you're out of hot dogs. Zero competition. There's no carnies up the street. There's no Wienerschnitzel. There's no everybody at that track. If you want to eat, you must get in your car. You must leave the infield. You must drive under the track, under the tunnel, go back out. By the time you just get to the street, it's 20 minutes. You're trapped. You're inside the venue.

[Travis Corkery]

But you would think that that would make them more likely to stock up on everything because that's your only option. That's just bad business.

[Gina Grad]

F you. We have the $10 Louisiana dog. We got plenty of those. If you want those, you can have those. And then. So I said, fine, we'll get the ten dollar Louisiana dog. And then I'm like, sonny, what do you like on your hot dog, boy? I said, relish. Relish. All right. Did they have relish? No.

[Bald Brian]

Oh, come on.

[Gina Grad]

Why should they? Why would you? If you trapped a bunch of prisoners and their wallets in a place, why.

[Travis Corkery]

Would you give them free condiments?

[Gina Grad]

Why would you give them something they wanted when there's no reason to. Relish was what free at the free relish store? You can't charge for relish. Right?

[Bald Brian]

Doesn't benefit them.

[Gina Grad]

You have to pay for relish. Right. Thus do we have our answer? Yeah, no relish. And. Or you can get in your car and you can drive through the infield and go through the tunnel and go down the super long highway and go find your own place that has relish in it. Somewhere in Fontana. That's a half hour from here.

[Travis Corkery]

So, sunny, how is the plain Louisiana dog?

[Bald Brian]

It was good.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah? All right, now what did daddy ask for? Some chili on.

[Bald Brian]

And they're like, no chili.

[Gina Grad]

Then what did daddy ask for? You asked for some dip. I wanted onions. Oh, yeah, you want onions? Guess who does not provide onions. How do you sell hot dogs, by the way?

[Bald Brian]

And look I'm the Louisiana Link.

[Gina Grad]

I'm not for the. I'm not. I don't want the man getting involved. But you should not be able to sell hot dogs. Why?

[Bald Brian]

At least the bylaw.

[Gina Grad]

You should not be able to sell hot dogs if you do not provide relish and. Or onions. I would like both, by the way.

[Bald Brian]

I'm gonna lose my mind. If there was no mustard.

[Gina Grad]

There was mustard and ketchup, the two of the most basic elements.

[Allison Rosen]

Wait a second.

[Gina Grad]

That was it? No chili, no peppers, no tomatoes, no nothing. No fries? No. You get a bag of Doritos. Why? Fries cost money to make and they take effort to make a bag of Doritos, you can buy a 50 pack for 50 cents and hand it to Sonny.

[Travis Corkery]

But the markup on fries is huge. Again, they're just burning money.

[Gina Grad]

Markup. Charge whatever you want for Doritos. Where we going? To the other stand. Who has Doritos at a better price?

[Travis Corkery]

Now, were the. Were the mustard and ketchup, were they individual packets? Or was like an empty squeezy jug?

[Gina Grad]

Huge squeezy jug. And that was it. So anyway, anyone who doesn't like competition. No. Competition brings out the worst in everybody every time. Think about restaurants. Think of one restaurant, what they would charge and what they would serve. One sushi place in all of Los Angeles. Think about what they would serve and what they would charge. All right. Sonny?

[Bald Brian]

Yeah.

[Gina Grad]

You doing okay? Yeah.

[Bald Brian]

How much of Jurassic World are you planning on seeing between your fingers?

[Allison Rosen]

What, like this?

[Gina Grad]

Sonny does put his hands up in front of his face.

[Bald Brian]

Sometimes Jurassic World can be a little intense. Not saying it's gonna terrify. I'm just saying. You ever seen a man disemboweled?

[Gina Grad]

Yeah.

[Bald Brian]

Okay. Well, that'll be fine.

[Gina Grad]

It's different than when you walk in on Daddy on the toilet. It's a different. Disembowel's gotta laugh. All right, Sonny, step out. I was just. A waste of my time. Yeah. Yeah.

[Travis Corkery]

Nice tags.

[Gina Grad]

Good. Go rape Daddy's vending machine. Daddy's gonna be in here with the grown ups.

[Travis Corkery]

I love his lockout.

[Gina Grad]

Travis? Yeah, Scott. He's got his. He's got his. Get her done. And here come the judge. Arctic ease of beef. Travis, you get that mic situated? Arctic ease. Oh, man. Could I have used some of that Arctic ease.

[Bald Brian]

He's covered yourself. Why didn't you bring some? Perhaps your body in it.

[Travis Corkery]

Mummify yourself.

[Gina Grad]

We put the cell phone in a Ziploc bag and put it in the cooler to pre cool it. Before we placed it inside of the car.

[Bald Brian]

Still, nature had other plants.

[Gina Grad]

No, that was today. We didn't know the thing. I didn't know the cell phone would tilt. I mean, I honestly, out of the sun, putting one of those cell phones not on your dashboard where it's getting beaten down by the sun, but inboard, where it's not being hit by the sun. I didn't know that things could get hot enough for those things to go awry. Well, evidently it can. And it's the one time of wearing three layers. Runners, lifters, weekend warriors, injuries, fact of life. Let's get some ice therapy. That's what I needed. Yeah, I'm gonna wrap that thing around my neck next time. Good for racing. Yeah, no, I brought. I actually brought a cold pack this time, but I forgot to. Anyway, they started the. All right, let's focus here. No freezer needed. Reusable. Gary, Arctic Ease. Next time we hit the track, please. Instant, long lasting cold compression therapy, even while you're training, stays in place. Works like a charm. Get reusable. Arctic Ease cold wraps, cvs or arcticease.com Irvine Coming up July 2, Adam Goldberg. I'm very interested in talking to Adam Goldberg. I like that guy a lot. One of those guys who's quietly been in every movie.

[Bald Brian]

Tons of movies.

[Gina Grad]

Tons of movies.

[Bald Brian]

Recognize it for sure.

[Gina Grad]

Las Vegas, US at the Hard Rock. Coming up July 10th and 11th.

[Bald Brian]

Pack the Arctic Ease.

[Gina Grad]

Dana Gould's gonna be there. I think Carrot Top's gonna be there. I think. I know Mike hasn't said anything. He said something to me, and he said something to Kevin and Bean. So we'll try to work this one out. I think Louie Anderson as well. Santa Monica, lot of shows coming up. Toronto, playing the Newman documentary at the Cineplex Cinemas. If you want to see that, you're out in Toronto way. Take a knee. We got Stephen from Freakonomics.

[Bald Brian]

Wow.

[Gina Grad]

My number one question to him, which he completely agreed with, and we were dumbfounded. Why doesn't the entire world, but especially politicians, just run off of Freakonomics? Like, well, you know, it turns out whatever they do, turns out that'll be the policy. Like, they look into things and go, well, here's how it goes. Here's what's effective as it turns out. You want to get people to pay taxes. Here's what you do. You want to get people to not exceed the speed limit. Turns out, here's what you do. And some of the stuff is you go, oh, yeah, yeah. Makes sense. And other stuff is like, Oh, I don't know. I never would have thought of it that way. But maybe they're right, and they checked it out, and then they explain it to you, and you go, let's do so. True. So if you want more kids to stay in school, here's what you do. If you want more people to sign up to donate organs, here's what you do. All the stuff in society that we'd like everyone to do, well, here's what you do. We have the smart guys study it. Not the guys with the Grecian formula and the BS handshake.

[Bald Brian]

Yeah, right there. The answer is right there.

[Gina Grad]

Well, there's only one answer.

[Bald Brian]

They're providing it for you.

[Gina Grad]

Yes. It's not. It's not Mayor Villa Tardo up there giving some BS Latin heritage speech. It's just him going, here's the answer.

[Travis Corkery]

Right?

[Gina Grad]

This is the answer. Hey, Gavin Newsom, Brown people going to check cashing places. Well, how do we eradicate that? Well, give it to the smart guys. Let them tell you, and then that'll be the answer. Why is that not the answer for everything? And then it's a lot of like. Well, there's a lot of politics and race and nationality. Oh, no, not with these guys. These guys just have a problem, they fix it, and then they tell you the answer. It has nothing to do with heritage, race, religion, background, sexual proclivity, Nothing. They'll give you the answer, and then as the politician, you just provide the answer. That's what the smart guy said. Why are we listening to you? And perhaps the fuck does Gavin Newsom know? Right?

[Travis Corkery]

And they're probably thinking, well, you know, we want to be racially sensitive, or we want to be, you know, sensitive to whoever, whatever the politics. But these guys are the real sensitive ones because they're not taking that into account. It's not about that. Yes, the answer.

[Gina Grad]

Would you like your oncologist going? I'm gonna go study this data. But hold on. Black guy or white guy? What do we got here? Jew?

[Bald Brian]

No, just do what you gotta do.

[Gina Grad]

I'm gonna factor that in heavily, right? I'm gonna. I'm gonna put this guy's CAT scan up, but I want to know if it's a Mexican's head.

[Bald Brian]

See what that has any to do with it.

[Gina Grad]

I need to know.

[Bald Brian]

I don't see what.

[Gina Grad]

Provide answers. I want to know if this thing's living inside a black guy, a Mexican guy, an Asian guy, or a white guy or a girl. Sure. I need a fact. Or lesbian. I need to Factor all that shit in before I do.

[Bald Brian]

What you got to know when you come into the waiting room, if you're going to shake hands or fist bump.

[Gina Grad]

Fuck.

[Bald Brian]

You got to know.

[Gina Grad]

Just get in the fucking lab and come back with a fucking answer. I asked him, does it drive you nuts that our society doesn't work just off of you guys?

[Bald Brian]

I'm sure he said yes.

[Gina Grad]

Yes. It's like, drives me nuts.

[Bald Brian]

I love the Freakonomics guys. I read the books. I listen to the podcast. They're great. Sometimes their stuff can be controversial because. Doesn't take into account people's, I don't know, religious or cultural views. Like, famously, when they. You know that they equated a. The. The abortion laws with a drop in crime 18 years later because a lot of unwanted kids were being born. A lot of people freaked out about that because they're saying you're. You're saying abortion is the key to. It's like, no, no, not really. We're saying there's a correlation, causation. But I'm saying people.

[Gina Grad]

Nobody should freak out about this data more than they freak out over a tumor or a torn acl.

[Bald Brian]

Like, it is what it is.

[Gina Grad]

That's the data. Sorry, blame the guy with the fucking glasses who went to Yale, but that's the data. So now let's do it.

[Bald Brian]

Yeah. People get wrapped up in their ideology.

[Gina Grad]

Fucking assholes in this society. Hey, I know my heart of hearts. Your heart of hearts ain't where. And by the way, your heart doesn't have a heart. You have one heart and half a brain. Now listen what the smart guys are telling you, just like you do in everything else in life. You go up to the pilot, tell them how to fly the plane. Do you do anything else in life where you're gonna go explain to the guy with the education who's crunching numbers how it's gonna work? Because you know in your heart of hearts. Shut the fuck up. Hi, Travis. Adam, what's going on?

[Skip Bedell]

I'm right with you.

[Gina Grad]

Could there be any societal argument of let the guys crunch numbers, and then we'll decide whether we should hand out needles to junkies or not. Whatever it is, sensitive as you want, if you can back it up with math, then nobody can argue with you. That's my whole point is what Gavin Newsom can do is go, here's what's going on in black and Hispanic communities. And by the way, don't yell at me. I'm just telling you what the bean counters gave me. Sorry, Hispanics Go ahead.

[Travis Corkery]

But you know, at the end of the day, Adam, it's cool because they.

[Gina Grad]

Do need more bean counters over there.

[Travis Corkery]

Gavin Newsom's just the kind of guy I'd like to have a beer with.

[Gina Grad]

Yep. All right. There you go. Everything's problem. All the problems are solved.

[Bald Brian]

Keep him drinking while other people fix.

[Travis Corkery]

The problems, all right?

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, yeah, keep him drunk. We need a politician we have a beer with. Okay.

[Bald Brian]

Travis, you're all the way from Alaska.

[Skip Bedell]

Speaking of drinking, this man Gria is fantastic, by the way.

[Gina Grad]

Oh, good. Thank you very much. Absolutely.

[Travis Corkery]

You've been drinking pretty steadily since about what, four?

[Bald Brian]

They poured me like a five gallon.

[Gina Grad]

Bucket full of mammary. It said here, hop in, buddy. So is it. When did you go to Alaska, Travis? I was born there. Answer the question.

[Skip Bedell]

Right around 1981, I found myself in Alaska.

[Gina Grad]

Uh huh. And what is it? First off, when is the sun setting over there? Was it 111 degrees in your car yesterday? What goes on in Alaska?

[Bald Brian]

It's been really warm.

[Skip Bedell]

It was like 80 degrees when I.

[Gina Grad]

Got on the plane to come down here.

[Bald Brian]

And now global warming, guys, it's 475.

[Gina Grad]

Degrees outside here right now, so. I know. And is. Is what? What do you do for profession out there?

[Skip Bedell]

I twist wrenches. I'm an industrial equipment mechanic.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh.

[Gina Grad]

Could use you on my car, man. I saw the Lambo back there. You say the word, I want giant.

[Skip Bedell]

Rims or a huge stereo, I'm your man.

[Gina Grad]

I'm sitting on my keys, by the way, and I. I think the. Oh, the porcelain punisher. Did he drive Matt back to my house to drop him off? I was gonna let him use my car. I believe he did. He probably used his own car. He's in Uber mode, man.

[Bald Brian]

He charged him. He made a sweet six bucks.

[Gina Grad]

So Travis, how'd you come up with a greater than, less than? By the way, you said call back.

[Skip Bedell]

In at the end of the show.

[Gina Grad]

With a bit and I had nothing.

[Skip Bedell]

So while I was on hold, I said okay.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, there's a guessing game we can.

[Skip Bedell]

Play that requires no prep on my part.

[Gina Grad]

And I appreciate it. I think we're going to play it in the. In the flesh here.

[Bald Brian]

Yes, I enjoy that game. Yeah, some reasoning. And you always learn something a little crazy. It's like, what?

[Gina Grad]

Yep. Well, first we will give a little love to Simplisafe Smart Home Security. Dawson has it. Mike August has it. Dawson just set it up and then found out he had to move. Which if you hardwire your system in, you I don't think you can travel with it. It's hardwired into your home, apartment, whatever. Now this is good if you have an apartment, a condo or something like that. It's also good if you're on a slab. You don't have the crawl space, but who the hell wants to crawl underneath the house? You go to simplisafe.com you basically get all the components of your security system, and they all just peel and stick onto the wall with the 3M tape. The batteries last up to five years. Even the keypads, however many motion detectors you need, however many glass or door detectors or whatever it is. Windows, put it all in. Do it in 20 minutes. Shows up in a box on your door after you order it online. So you go to SimpleLife simply with two I's. By the way, SimpleSafeAdam.com you get 10% off SimpleSafe Adam. And by the way, if you have to move, you just unsettled. Stick it and pack it with you. Simply safe. Adam.com. all right, Travis, should we play a little of the game? Let's go. Greater than, less than. The numbers are the same. When Travis calls in with his list of.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, it's time to play the game.

[Gina Grad]

What kind of wrenches you use, Travis? Snap on when I can.

[Skip Bedell]

Whatever I feel like throwing when I get mad. It's fine, though.

[Gina Grad]

Snap on is the best. All right. But you pay for it. All right, give it to us. All right.

[Skip Bedell]

Speaking of black people, how about the percentage of women who use online dating that will consider sex on the first date versus the number of black NHL players?

[Gina Grad]

Percentage. Percentage.

[Bald Brian]

So this is a question they answer when they sign up or create a profile or whatever?

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, yeah. They did a sample. They got a survey.

[Travis Corkery]

So percentage of girls who will sleep with you on the first date as. As told by an online versus how many black NHL players.

[Gina Grad]

Yes.

[Travis Corkery]

Amazing.

[Gina Grad]

So you have to check that. I will consider it. Box.

[Bald Brian]

Yeah.

[Gina Grad]

By the way, as guys that are viewing the page, it's also box where you just added £40 that you've checked. In our mind, that's the way guys think. By the way, was watching a little Facts of Life today.

[Travis Corkery]

Oh, nice.

[Gina Grad]

Turns out Natalie, the fat one from Facts of Life, not so fat.

[Bald Brian]

Really? Time has been kind to her.

[Gina Grad]

No, we have been.

[Bald Brian]

Times evolved. We evolved over time.

[Gina Grad]

We have fat people now. Like, real fat people now. Natalie was always, you know, 25 pounds overweight, so she got to be the fat one. But now that we've gone to 125 pounds overweight. She's not really that too happy.

[Travis Corkery]

And you know what? To that end, Blair Warner, not that thin. No, the hot, super hot one on the show.

[Gina Grad]

She started. It was like. It was like a fight where one guy's 176 and the other guy's fighting like 155. And they do a catch weight at like 164, where Natalie was moving down and Blair was moving up to a catch weight. There's a catch weight.

[Travis Corkery]

Oh, there she is. Mindy Green.

[Gina Grad]

There she is.

[Travis Corkery]

Wow.

[Gina Grad]

Oh.

[Travis Corkery]

Oh, nada. Oh, it's Natalie Green on the show.

[Gina Grad]

Right. You could find a picture where she wasn't busting out of her pants. Gary. That helped?

[Bald Brian]

No, but her face is.

[Travis Corkery]

Well, those jeans. Those jeans weren't kind to her.

[Gina Grad]

You can find one from later on. We're having trouble with full body shots. That's why we chose this one. Sorry. Anyway, the point is, is she was fat. Like when I grew up. It's like, oh, the fat one from the. Turns out the fat one had an extra 15, 20 pounds on her, but not today's fat. All right.

[Bald Brian]

Joe gets enough credit for being hot on Facts of Life.

[Travis Corkery]

By the way, Nancy McKeon.

[Gina Grad]

Lot of Joe in the episode I saw today. Sorry. Psych up for a race.

[Travis Corkery]

Usually when it's a lot of Joe, that means it's a very special episode because she had a lot of problems.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, she was tough. You could tell because her sleeves were always rolled up. That meant she was eager for the fray. All right, so percentage. Well, NHL's got some brothers in there now, do they?

[Travis Corkery]

What team?

[Bald Brian]

I don't watch a ton of NHL that. I never see a highlight.

[Gina Grad]

It went from 0.00 my entire life to a couple of. Oh, you know, you've had a good day. I mean, you've broken down the color barrier and you've come a long way. It's kind of thing Martin Luther King would have dreamt of. Two black guys, opposite teams, kicking the shit out of each other, fighting. That's a banner. Yeah. That's something that the good doctor could have only dreamt of.

[Bald Brian]

That's the dream, right?

[Gina Grad]

Two guys trying to kill each other of your race in the center of the rink.

[Bald Brian]

I have a dream. And that's it.

[Gina Grad]

I would say in hockey, we're at about 4%.

[Bald Brian]

Well, is it percentage or number?

[Gina Grad]

Percentage. Percentage. It can't be. Number.

[Bald Brian]

Total number of black hockey players out of the percentage.

[Skip Bedell]

It's the percentage of women who will sleep with me on a first date.

[Gina Grad]

The Royal.

[Bald Brian]

Oh, sorry.

[Gina Grad]

I'm sorry. Well, it's weird when you toggle from percentage to number, but total number. A Black hockey player, 2 percentage. All right, so the total number can't be much higher than 15 in the entire league.

[Bald Brian]

I would guess is. My guess is under 10, but I don't know.

[Gina Grad]

I wish you were right, Brian, But I'm telling you.

[Bald Brian]

Come on. Leave this one back.

[Gina Grad]

No pleasure in sharing this with you. But I've seen some brothers. I've seen a couple brothers on the same team.

[Travis Corkery]

You want to settle with 12 or you want to go full 15?

[Gina Grad]

I'm going to say the chicks that do it in the thing got to be lower than the thing and thing. I say the chicks are lower.

[Bald Brian]

Does the Percent. Does the. Does the. I will have sex on the first date, does that pop up on the profile or. I'm open to it. Does that pop up on the. Is it publicly viewable?

[Gina Grad]

As I understand it, they did a.

[Skip Bedell]

Survey of a couple hundred thousand women on dating websites, and the number of women that would say yes, are open to the idea of it on a first date.

[Travis Corkery]

You both are married folks. You don't really know what's going on out there. I think. I think the chicks are pretty loose these days. I'd venture to say that's a higher number.

[Bald Brian]

I was gonna say the same thing. If it's not publicly viewable and they're not being, like, publicly shamed and saying, no, never, then I'd say some chicks are open to banging right away. I say the chicks percentage.

[Travis Corkery]

Are we all going chicks?

[Gina Grad]

Is that what happened? No, I said chicks. Lower.

[Bald Brian]

Yeah. Hockey player for Adam.

[Gina Grad]

All right.

[Skip Bedell]

There are 40% of women dating online that will sleep with you on the first date.

[Gina Grad]

40%.

[Bald Brian]

31 black hockey players.

[Travis Corkery]

Twice what you thought it was.

[Gina Grad]

Wow. Well, three times what Brian thought.

[Bald Brian]

I thought it was a single digit.

[Gina Grad]

31. How many teams are there in the NHL? We gotta do our own.

[Travis Corkery]

Those are both impressive numbers here.

[Gina Grad]

40%.

[Travis Corkery]

40% at all.

[Gina Grad]

Wow.

[Travis Corkery]

Shit's different out there.

[Gina Grad]

I guess. So now, is that 30 teams? They're 30 teams. So there's 1.31. Less than 1.1, 1.0. All right, 0.03 or whatever. The point is, do these include, like, those Ashley Madison's and stuff where it's like 100% will sleep with you? Because I feel like 40. Still incredibly high. I don't know who Ashley Madison is.

[Skip Bedell]

But if she'll sleep with me on a first date.

[Gina Grad]

Like, I got Jeff. Oh. Oh, you.

[Travis Corkery]

You really don't.

[Gina Grad]

There's so much going on that. Oh, I'm gonna have a. Oh, that's sunny. What a life he's got to look forward to. Oh, no. Natalia. Okay. Wow. You guys are right.

[Bald Brian]

Farmersonly.com is just code for white people only. Right? Right. Farmers only don't cater to cowboys. That's for white people. Well, they can't say white people only dot com.

[Travis Corkery]

And if that's true, then the same thing's probably for the sea captains one too, because there's also a sea captain, Sea captains one A Dating for sea captains.

[Gina Grad]

Mm.

[Travis Corkery]

You can get anything you want out there.

[Skip Bedell]

I wonder if there's more black farmers.

[Bald Brian]

Or black hockey players.

[Travis Corkery]

Look it up.

[Gina Grad]

I think a lot of Asians like rice farmers. Blacks are. They're sharecroppers back in the day. Back in the day. Never mind.

[Bald Brian]

Never mind.

[Gina Grad]

Okay. All right, you guys are up. Here we go. Okay. Okay. How about the top speed of the.

[Skip Bedell]

Bugatti Veyron Super Sport in miles per hour versus the number of Volkswagen Beetles sold in 1949? That was the first year they were available in the U.S. i feel like.

[Bald Brian]

Adam has some insider knowledge.

[Travis Corkery]

We're deferring to you for the first part of the question.

[Gina Grad]

The top speed of that car is. And I don't know about the Super Sport or the first or second generation or whatever, but it's. They probably claim it's like 252 or something, something like that. But I don't know that they've gotten it up past 250 something. But somewhere between 250 and 260. Seems to me about the speed. Maybe it's 262, I don't happen to know. But who would know how many of those Hitler mobiles they've sold? First year and the first run.

[Travis Corkery]

You gotta work.

[Gina Grad]

I'll tell you what. I did my. In 1973, my dad was driving one of the first ones.

[Bald Brian]

Yeah, My guess is that those weren't popular for a few decades, like Herbie, the Love Bug and all that.

[Travis Corkery]

Yeah, but only selling a couple hundred cars seems pretty low.

[Bald Brian]

But 1949, I feel like there's a real anti German sentiment in the U.S.

[Gina Grad]

It'S a German car.

[Skip Bedell]

They didn't like the Germans.

[Bald Brian]

Plus, was it shaped after you told me this? They were shaped after the German helmets. The.

[Gina Grad]

No, I didn't tell you that. The President helmets wagon was supposed to be like the Volkswagen. The wagon for the car, for everyone.

[Travis Corkery]

The Volkswagen.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. Hitler's like, I'm gonna build an autobahn and we're gonna stamp out a car so that everyone. He was sort of the. I was gonna say Henry Ford if he hated Jews, but it turns out Henry Ford hated Jews, too. All the great manufacturers of their day.

[Bald Brian]

But he's a slightly less bloodthirsty Henry Ford.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, Henry Ford was anti Semitic. And some could call Hitler anti Semitic as well.

[Travis Corkery]

On a bad day, surely.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, I couldn't. But they're there, historians that could. And he was going to build an autobahn and a car for everyone that could be stamped out cheaply, quickly, safely, and what have you. So eventually that's what happened. I'm gonna go with. I'm going with the Veyron. What the hell?

[Travis Corkery]

Yeah, I'm Volkswagen.

[Bald Brian]

I'm saying miles per hour are higher than the Volkswagen sales.

[Skip Bedell]

All right, well, Guinness verified the Veyron as able to go 268 miles per hour.

[Gina Grad]

Wow.

[Bald Brian]

Two passes. You have to do that to qualify.

[Gina Grad]

For an official record. And it got it.

[Bald Brian]

Two Volkswagen Beetles sold in America first year.

[Travis Corkery]

Bad business.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. Again. Yeah. That dealership had tumbleweeds. I think that things. Things probably worth something these days. The first two to be imported here, I would imagine. All right, let's do one more first. Dollar Shave Club. Have you not joined Dollar Shave Club yet? And if not, what the hell's up, man? I use it this morning. It's just one of those. And I was just sort of saying to everyone, I was having this conversation, leaving my house, going to Fontana, having to stop at the gas station, and having that fantasy conversation of what if you could just have your gas filled up while you were asleep that night and just get up the next day and you wouldn't have to get gas on the way into Fontana on the way back to the shop or whatever it is. That's what Dollar Shave Club is. And again, like, you know, there shouldn't be a Dollar Shave Club of wedding rings or engagement rings or maybe watches, but for cartridges.

[Bald Brian]

Yeah.

[Gina Grad]

Yes.

[Bald Brian]

This little item that can ruin your life in so many ways and that.

[Gina Grad]

You gotta go stand in line for or realize you're out of. And it's never. Like, you never know what the tally is because it's always in the drawer. And then you open it up like, oh, there's one left, or, oh, we're out of whatever.

[Travis Corkery]

And so help you if you don't bring the handle with you.

[Gina Grad]

I literally would go to the store holding the handle of the razor with me to figure out if the generic ones lined up with it or not. And this is it. It's Dollar Shave Club. Get your first box in about a week. Includes a free handle and a sleeve of cartridges and then replacement blades every month or every other month, depending on how you roll. Makes a great Father's Day gift. Oh, wait a minute. Well, for 2016, there's going to be another one. There will be another one, God willing. Give dad the gift that keeps on shaving. It's Dollar Shave Club. Michael Dubin was in here and he talked all about it. It's just a smart idea. Dollar Shave Club. That's dollarshaveclub.com Adam. Dollarshaveclub.com Adam. All right, let's do one more. One more.

[Skip Bedell]

How about the number of Internet connected computers in North Korea versus the number of new car dealerships in California?

[Gina Grad]

Ooh.

[Travis Corkery]

My first inclination is to go with the car dealerships.

[Gina Grad]

North Korea is bad. Korea. Korea.

[Adam Carolla]

Right now they claim.

[Bald Brian]

Oh, go ahead.

[Travis Corkery]

Well, they claim to have full connectivity and lots of computers, but I think that's misinformation.

[Bald Brian]

That's what I'm saying is this. Are these computers that are connected to the Internet, quote, unquote, like, the government reported stats like, oh, yeah, they have Internet connection, when in fact, it's kind of restricted.

[Skip Bedell]

As I understand it, this is our government's reporting on how many computers we.

[Gina Grad]

Believe them to have the real number versus car dealerships. I'm going to say there are more car dealerships in California.

[Bald Brian]

I just want to know how many there are. Yeah, car dealerships.

[Travis Corkery]

Yes, car dealerships.

[Bald Brian]

You're all right.

[Skip Bedell]

There's 1023 North Korean computers with Internet access. And there are 1307 brand new car.

[Gina Grad]

Dealerships passed behind a car on the way back, a new car on the way back from Fontana today. License plate frames, tennis is my racket. It's good on a new car.

[Skip Bedell]

That threw open my mouth a little.

[Gina Grad]

And I was explaining to Matt D'Andrea who was driving. Racket doesn't mean anything to the kids in the backseat anymore or anybody under 40 like you should be. Hey, bub, what's your racket?

[Bald Brian]

What racket?

[Gina Grad]

What racket you in?

[Bald Brian]

That's a good racket.

[Gina Grad]

It's no longer a good cliche or a good use of the word racket since racket has no meaning.

[Bald Brian]

Totally agree.

[Travis Corkery]

Was this a Mary Kay Cadillac, by chance? Because I don't know anyone else who would get into that joke.

[Gina Grad]

It was like a Volt or something. Was like a Prius. It was like a Newish. Nice. Ish car. Like, I remember taking note, like, oh, boy. Grandpa's car. Taking it out. You know, it wasn't a, you know, Chrysler le Baron from 1984. It was a brand new car that somebody had that on their license plate.

[Bald Brian]

I'm not 100% sure if racket is a good thing was a good thing or a bad thing, because you'd often hear, oh, that's a good bracket to be in, or what racket you in. But then there was like, what a racket.

[Travis Corkery]

This almost sounds like it's your vice. You know, tennis is my racket.

[Gina Grad]

Either way, not into it. It didn't make sense back then. By the way, racketeering, you playing tennis doesn't mean shit to me. Mm. It actually knocks you down a couple of rungs on the respect ladder because unless I've heard of you, unless you're one of the Bjorn Borg. Bjorn Borg or, you know, one of the Sister from the Venus or Williams. Yeah. Sisters. All it means is you waste time hitting a ball back and forth without getting a whole lot of a workout in.

[Travis Corkery]

What's the over under on them purchasing that themselves as opposed to, it didn't.

[Gina Grad]

Come with the car.

[Travis Corkery]

Right. But was it like, oh, and, honey, I got you something with your new car.

[Gina Grad]

Well, can I say this? If not that my kids would ever do this, but if they decided to get daddy a license plate frame that said, daddy number one daddy in the world, guess where it would live? Not on the fucking car. It would live in the garage. And I would put it up in the garage. And they'd be like, what if your kids. I say the same thing about all the bracelets that everyone wears. Like how my daughter made macra. Made this good daddy. She'll set it over his chest of drawers where he can see it every day, but daddy's not leaving the house in it.

[Bald Brian]

Happy Father's Day, everyone.

[Gina Grad]

I. Look, if my wife made me a license plate frame that said, I heart chugging cock, I would not put it on my car because it's not something I'm interested in advertising with the rest of humanity. I'm not interested in it.

[Bald Brian]

You would be interested in advertising it if you truly loved it.

[Gina Grad]

If I did love it. I love my kids. I may be the number one dad. Who knows? I haven't taken a. Taken a tally, but I would not annoy the rest of society by explaining to them what I do. I would put it up in the garage, up on the wall, and I would say, you know, daddy likes it here because on the back of the car, I can't see it when I'm driving, but when I. But I pull up into the garage, there it is, right on the wall.

[Travis Corkery]

So what if the kids split the difference and said, well, we don't like it because we don't hang out in the garage and we can't see it. Why don't you put it above the mantle of the fireplace in the living room?

[Gina Grad]

Why don't you get yourself some triple filtered water, sit in front of your 75 inch flat screen and go after yourself? Would be my answer. I have no. Perfect. Listen, this whole thing of like. Yeah, but what about your kids? What about. Well, what if they say, well, what. What about your. Have you talked to you? They're nine. Who gives an F? Did anyone care about you when you were nine?

[Travis Corkery]

Not really.

[Gina Grad]

Were your parents factoring in a whole bunch of things when you were 8 and 7? 8 and 9? Well, how's this gonna make Brian feel? And what about Brian's feelings? Like, who gives an F? Ryan can go over there and do his homework and shut the F up.

[Travis Corkery]

He'll be fine.

[Bald Brian]

He'll read quietly in the corner.

[Gina Grad]

We didn't even have it. Like, I didn't even get a preference of TV dinners. It wasn't like, well, Adam doesn't like Salisbury steak. No, no, we're getting Salisbury steak. Adam gonna have himself that. It was the answer as my.

[Bald Brian]

I'm on a white, too.

[Gina Grad]

Sorry, had something go a little technical. The answer for all things kids when I was a kid was no answer because it never came up.

[Bald Brian]

Yeah, your vote didn't count.

[Gina Grad]

Your vote didn't count. Just like it doesn't count in presidential elections. You're under 18. You get no vote.

[Bald Brian]

You get no vote.

[Gina Grad]

That's how it works. You get zero vote.

[Travis Corkery]

But they didn't ask just to give the illusion that you were part of the family, part of the democracy.

[Gina Grad]

My parents.

[Travis Corkery]

Yeah, no, I regretted that before I finished this.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, I hope so. Happy Father's Day. Go to your room. Take that back. All right. So, Travis, by the way, Corkery, you can hit his website, acthappyproductions.com. thanks for coming. You'll be in town for a little bit? Yeah, I took off Tuesday, I think. Okay. Thanks for coming in. Thank you for having me. Nice to meet you. Hold on. Don't go anywhere yet. Allison and Skip out there waiting. Nate. Well, I don't know. Maybe we'll just bring Allison and Skip in. Do we need a break, Gary? No, Just swap him out.

[Bald Brian]

You can leave now.

[Gina Grad]

Thanks, Travis.

[Travis Corkery]

You're excused.

[Gina Grad]

Have a little more mangoria out there, man. Good for what else?

[Travis Corkery]

Mattal, Uber you home.

[Gina Grad]

He's a pro.

[Bald Brian]

Nate, your nursed Uber driver is 40 seconds away.

[Gina Grad]

What's going on? Hey, get it on. Get it on, man. What's happening? So I am getting married August 24th, and then four days after that, my fiance is. Sorry. August 22nd. She's giving me a look now. Sorry. All right, we're bringing Skip and Allison after that, she's defending for her thesis, graduating with a PhD. Mm. And then after that, in beginning of September, we are moving to North Carolina and we're starting new jobs as well. And I'm just wondering, how do we handle all this stress doing it all at once? Mm. What's your PhD up on that screen, Gary? It's a weird thing. Yeah. What is your PhD in? PhD is in a molecular biology.

[Bald Brian]

Oh, she's going to work at like, Duke or something?

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, she's gonna be working at Duke.

[Bald Brian]

Yeah.

[Gina Grad]

What she. Oh, there you go.

[Bald Brian]

It's a world class institution for medical.

[Gina Grad]

What? What is she. Gary, don't bother staying up. Just look at my finger, would you please?

[Bald Brian]

You're doing a lot of pointing.

[Gina Grad]

What am I pointing? What direction am I pointing now? All right, now what direction am I pointing to, Gary?

[Travis Corkery]

Sideways.

[Gina Grad]

Sideways. Okay, sorry. Trying to get the screen figured out. There is anything on. Okay. The Newman documentary premieres tonight. The El Capitan Theater in Hollywood is that. We want that on the screen. All right, so we had our screen thing worked out, Gary. I would point down. I would point to the side it was on. All right, all right. Anyway. Sorry, Nate. Yes.

[Travis Corkery]

Yeah, A lot of. Lot of irons in the fire. A lot of balls in the air for Nate.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, it's like you take your main stressors of life. You know, a new job, getting married and moving, and basically doing it all within four weeks. Mm. All right, so it's a tough time. Cry me a fucking river.

[Bald Brian]

It's an exciting time in your life. Now you're gonna look back on this as a time of great change.

[Gina Grad]

Hold on a second. When did being busy become such a burden? You know what I mean?

[Bald Brian]

Moving across the country and starting a.

[Gina Grad]

New job, getting married, and I'm tired of everybody.

[Bald Brian]

You're tired?

[Gina Grad]

I'm tired, but I'm tired of like, you know, like this thing where it's like.

[Bald Brian]

Okay, Skip, I know you've never seen Adam like this.

[Gina Grad]

That's what everyone says. Oh, man. I'M so busy. Well, you should be fucking happy you're busy. Like some people don't even have a fucking job. Here's what I am doing and Skip is doing. And it's fine. I got up today, went to Fontana to do a car race with my kids, and then when I was done, we drove straight here to do a podcast. And when we're done with this, we will drive to Phil Rosenthal's house. By the way, nothing's conveniently on the way from where I live to Fontana. Phil Rosenthal lives in Hancock park on Wilshire Boulevard. And then when we're done, we will drive home. And then tomorrow I will see Skip somewhere around 8am and where are we gonna be tomorrow? Torrance or something? Yeah, right. Okay. That's what the schedule is. So my wife will look at me and go, ah, wow. And I'll go, no, no. I get to go race Paul Newman's race car. Then I get to go do a podcast. Then I get to go Phil Rosendal's house and watch a first Run theater. And then we get to go do a TV show tomorrow morning. And yes, it's busy, but what? It's life. It's called life.

[Travis Corkery]

It sounds like this Nate doesn't have a lot of experience in being overwhelmed. And since you do, he's looking to the king of be busy. And how do you handle it? How do you process that if you're.

[Gina Grad]

Not used to it, Break everything off. Do it in order. Do it sequentially, and just mow it down. Right. Chip away. Just chip away. Nate, you good? Yeah. I mean, when I see you, like, you're a very busy guy and you're able to knock them out, like, one by one, start, do everything in order, and just knock it out.

[Bald Brian]

I'm gonna give Nate some of your advice, great advice that I've tried to live my life by, which is change is almost always good, especially when it's change that you're doing for yourself. It's scary moving across the country, getting a new job, getting married, all that shit. But change is almost always good. So you're gonna look back on and be like, that was. I'm glad I did that.

[Gina Grad]

Force you to get outside of your comfort zone, force you to grow.

[Travis Corkery]

And when in doubt, do what I do and just knock off one Klonopin and put that in your alto tin. You'll be okay.

[Gina Grad]

Xanax? Yep.

[Travis Corkery]

Speaking of fizzy, have one. Just don't eat the yellow one.

[Gina Grad]

Like, chew the Xanax up and just, like, skipping out Justin Bedell here. Catch contractor. New season on the way and running as we speak on Spike. 10:00. Good episodes this year. Skip is the real deal. We've talked about him before. I mean, he looks the part and all that kind of stuff, but he actually knows what the hell he's doing. Also just a sweet guy, Good guy. It makes life so much easier when you're doing one of these TV shows and you should work with just normal human beings. And I had a little. Allison, I'll throw you in that group as well. You just made it, by the way, skinnier teeth. No, I had a conversation with some of our production people. The whole crew's great, right? Yeah, they're great people. Everybody we work with. Yeah. And I said, I don't know. I was saying, Skip's a pretty regular guy. I'm a pretty regular guy. We just want to get the hell out of here. Basically. It's the whole plan. And they were explaining about, yeah, we had to do something with one of the Waynes brothers or something. He'd be locked in his trailer for an hour and not come out. You know, they've worked with prima donnas. And I said to him, I'm the ultimate prima donna. I want to get the fuck out of here.

[Bald Brian]

I'll be around you people.

[Gina Grad]

I'll never be locked in my trailer because I want to get the fuck out of here so we can go home. So I could be locked in my trailer for an hour having a fit. But we don't get to go home until I come out of the trailer and we do what we got to do. Yeah. I don't know why more people aren't wired that way, but Skip, third season in, hasn't turned to a prima donna. No, man. You know, I mean, I. I come from getting dirty every day, you know? So for me, this is like, hey, let's go film stuff, you know? So, I mean, this. This is great. And we seem to chug along pretty good with the schedule sometimes. I mean, you know, it's a lot of stand around and wait too, which is kind of like that. I think that kind of. I know it pisses you off. I'm sure. I'm sure of that. Oh, I lost my headphone. I'm sure of that. Especially when we're baking in the sun, we're in a trailer, we're waiting to start a scene, and then they tell us to come out. And then you stand there for 20 minutes before they actually start rolling the cameras. Like, okay, I was in the air conditioned trailer. Now I'm baking my fucking neck. It's like a lobster. Right? Thank you. Last season, I started stepping out of the trailer.

[Travis Corkery]

I came out in my thong underwear.

[Gina Grad]

Once with my no shirt on. She did.

[Travis Corkery]

Because I was like, leave me the fuck alone. I'm gonna be out of as soon as I'm dressed.

[Gina Grad]

You know, they tell you, hurry up, hurry, five minutes. Okay, I'm getting dressed. Yeah. But then you get out there and you don't do anything. And they keep knock, knock, knock, knock, knock.

[Travis Corkery]

I'm like, you know what? Okay, you want me now? I'm coming right now.

[Gina Grad]

Wow. She walked out. I was like, where are you going? She's like, I'm going out. I'm like, like that. She's like, yep, yep, we're doing it tomorrow.

[Adam Carolla]

I.

[Bald Brian]

The same thing as long underwear, isn't it?

[Gina Grad]

I gotta say, Adam brings out the phone. You don't realize how little time you spend standing in a yard. Not in the shade, just in the yard with no ball cap and no sunglasses. You will never do that as an adult in real life. But when you do a TV show, it's give us the cap, give us the glasses, put on a T shirt and just stand.

[Travis Corkery]

Brian, I would not recommend that.

[Bald Brian]

I'm not going to do it.

[Gina Grad]

Never do that. That would be bad for you, Brian. So skip now, Allison, I know you fly back and forth. You got a job? Yeah. It's been a lot of flying. Is your job? Parole officer. What is like technically the name of your probation officer? Probation officer. I've been flying two to three, sometimes four times a week. You don't do that here, going back and forth? No, I work full time in New York. And so what is, what is a normal day for you? Just getting out and doing your job. You carry, Carry a gun. Yep. Carry a badge. Yep. And going out, making the rounds?

[Travis Corkery]

Yeah.

[Gina Grad]

Right now I'm in investigations.

[Travis Corkery]

So I do investigations for the court.

[Gina Grad]

And write pre sentence investigation reports for.

[Travis Corkery]

The court, recommendations for sentencing. I interview all of the parties involved.

[Gina Grad]

The officers who made the arrest, the victims, the defendant, and make a recommendation.

[Travis Corkery]

Based upon the whole. Their whole history.

[Gina Grad]

You get a pretty good idea when you just. When the door opens of a house of whether something. Exactly what's going on and whether it can be fixed or not. Yeah, after, you know, it's kind of like. Yeah, after a while you start to see the same thing over and over and over. It's always the crappiest house on the block. You know, if you've Been there for the first time, you know.

[Travis Corkery]

You know, looking for the house.

[Gina Grad]

It's always the worst one on the block. Yeah, everybody's got the same excuses, just.

[Travis Corkery]

Like you guys were talking about with the.

[Gina Grad]

The contractors. You can predict, like, one of five things that they're going to say when you start confronting them. It's the same thing, right? How is it, like, my impulse is to find these people's parents, kick them in the nutsack. At least the Dan go, what the. Look what your kids are doing. These are your kids. Like, don't we have an ounce of honor or dignity? Well, not really, because oftentimes I'll look up the parents in the computer and.

[Bald Brian]

They'Ve got the whole.

[Travis Corkery]

They got a rap sheet.

[Gina Grad]

The parents have been through the system.

[Bald Brian]

First, teach them the family business.

[Gina Grad]

You learn from example. It's funny because I always go, God, I feel sorry for the kids. And Allison's like, I feel sorry for the pets. Yeah, you don't realize how shitty these people treat their pet. I mean, imagine if you're going to treat your kids in. In a certain way, the pets are always going to fall down the rung. A few rungs on that ladder. Right? I call SPCA before I call cps.

[Bald Brian]

Wow.

[Gina Grad]

Hey, it's like Gavin Newsome. She works small to big.

[Bald Brian]

That's priority, literally.

[Gina Grad]

I like that. The pestle, like chained to a tree in the backyard. Oh, yeah.

[Travis Corkery]

So are the cats.

[Gina Grad]

So, Skip, you're out here now and you're not running jobs back in New York? I have jobs running back in New York, but on a much, much smaller scale right now because I did that last season. I ran full operation last season, and it was very hard to do. So everything was over the phone, by Internet, by text, with clients and stuff. And it got a little bit crazy, you know, So I just didn't book a lot of work for these couple of months that we're out here doing this. And I start getting busy now as soon as I go back, so. And I found it's a lot less stressful that way. Skip, as I've said before, knows his business. Normally the camp, these shows, and they just get some guy looks the part. But Skip walks the walk, talks, talk. And we talk a lot about the ins and outs and what's going on and discover a lot sort of as we're going along, trying to bus these guys. Always, always fun. Because Skip's sort of a black belt in building. I have that background, too. So we try to find things that the other one hasn't discovered yet. When they tear open the wall, it's like a forensic examination, right? Yeah. You know, I learned a lot because I wasn't an electrician or plumber. And, you know, I've been out of the game for 20 years. Although I've always built along the way, so I've sort of kept my big toe in the building pool. I've not really been involved with the codes, and a lot of stuff that's going on skips from the east coast. So the codes are a little bit different out here. Earthquakes and whatnot versus, you know, basements and flooding. Yeah. So there's a lot to keep up with. And then each job changes from the bedroom to the bathroom to the kitchen to some outdoor stuff we're doing now. Yeah, they're always different, man. And, I mean, you and I spend a lot of time obviously on camera, but off camera too. And you're right. We have some cool conversation and try to dissect what we're seeing and what the hell's going on. You're constantly studying. Yeah, because, you know, some of the things that we see, I mean, you gotta. You gotta wonder what was going through this person's mind. What motivated. Do they just want to steal the money and not do the job? Right. Or did they really, like, attempt to do something and just didn't have the skills over their head? Right. Yeah. Yeah. All right. We have a Rich Banks song that's timely because it has to do with Gina Grad attending an orgy.

[Travis Corkery]

I mean, watch. You would not have liked the one I was at.

[Gina Grad]

This is. Yeah, well, she went to an orgy, but really, it's just sort of. Why would she have not liked it with dudes involved or, like, what happened?

[Travis Corkery]

Trust me. Oh, by the way, I learned a new term.

[Gina Grad]

Fill me in on this.

[Travis Corkery]

The people who. When I was describing the guys with the mustaches and the dress shirts, but the no pants. Do you know what that's called? Apparently, according to everyone on Twitter, I do.

[Gina Grad]

But if I say everyone will think I'm into it.

[Bald Brian]

Don't say.

[Travis Corkery]

It's a really disgusting verb. They made it a verb. Porky pigging.

[Gina Grad]

Oh, really? Oh, the shirt. No, no, nothing down below.

[Travis Corkery]

A real orgy? Yes. How'd you end up doing that exactly? I know.

[Gina Grad]

Did you know it was an orgy when you arrived or.

[Travis Corkery]

But I didn't know it was in the. I didn't know it was in Riverside. I was kind of blindfolded. You went to it on purpose? Yes, I tried. Did you Try to participate. No, I tried to get the out of there, but. But if you knew what it was, I was open to whatever. But once I got there with the. With the clientele was not for me.

[Gina Grad]

It's usually a bunch of single dudes too, like hanging out, just getting off. Right.

[Travis Corkery]

There was a buffet. Yes, there was a buffet. That was very off putting.

[Gina Grad]

She's like, yeah.

[Travis Corkery]

Oh, yeah.

[Bald Brian]

Sneeze guard. Yeah, they gotta date on local ordinances.

[Travis Corkery]

Yeah, it was just. It was really. It was a real low end.

[Gina Grad]

Waist high. Sneeze.

[Bald Brian]

Waist high. Must have expected smaller people.

[Travis Corkery]

Yeah, it was no good.

[Gina Grad]

Rich, you sound like you have a lot of experience in this matter.

[Travis Corkery]

No, that was my first and my last.

[Gina Grad]

The. Here's what I want to say.

[Bald Brian]

Your most recent.

[Gina Grad]

The orgies. You know, look, if you've seen like Caligula or something, that's an orgy ship and everyone's hot, you know, European looking.

[Bald Brian]

Caligula's fisting the groom elbow deep.

[Gina Grad]

I would say this for those of you who really have an orgy fantasy, don't ever attend an actual orgy. Especially in the Inland Empire. And this is a lot like the Batmobile. We had the actual Batmobile at the man show.

[Bald Brian]

Not the cool one, the old 1960s.

[Gina Grad]

The old school Batmobile that started off like a Lincoln Continental or something like that. But either way, I can't remember what it was. But the point is, when Jimmy saw the Batmobile that was at the man show, the actual George Barris built Batmobile, he went, this ain't the Batmobile. I said, yeah, it is. It's the real Batmobile. George Barris brought it. He said, no, it's not. It looks like a piece of shit. And it's the reason. It's because he got to walk up on it and see that the labels were the same labeler his mom used on Tupperware and stuff as a kid. And the different bits and pieces you see are just pulled from the hardware store and all that. You can't walk up on it. You have to see it zoom by in film. And that's the same way I feel about the orgy.

[Bald Brian]

If we see a zoom by film.

[Gina Grad]

Zoom by in film. When you walk up on it. It's a bunch of fat dudes, man. Do not go to a nude beach. That's the same. I went to nude beach before I was with you. You think it would be a pretty cool experience. It's not in Santrope? Yes. In. In Venice, California. Probably not so much.

[Bald Brian]

The only time it lives up is in Vegas. You're going like a topless pool out there. That's pretty sweet.

[Travis Corkery]

Otherwise, the Greek Islands was a real letdown.

[Gina Grad]

Let's. I thought you were gonna see a bunch of Greek gods, like, statuesque type of dudes.

[Travis Corkery]

A lot of really depressed Germans that. That don't tan well.

[Gina Grad]

Let's hear. Let's hear Rich's songs. Small Wienerschnitzels. Here she comes. Lots of folks to meet. Showing up to a warehouse.

[Bald Brian]

Might leave with some bd.

[Gina Grad]

Hey, hey.

[Bald Brian]

It's an orgy.

[Gina Grad]

And Gina thought she'd check out the scene, and she forgot that the dude there would want to get in her machine.

[Bald Brian]

Even though she showed up, she wasn't there to fuck.

[Gina Grad]

So Gina got her chest painted.

[Bald Brian]

It took a tanker truck.

[Gina Grad]

Hey, hey.

[Bald Brian]

It's an orangey mustache dude in nothing but socks.

[Gina Grad]

She tried to shake the hand of a stranger and ended up stroking.

[Travis Corkery]

That's amazing.

[Gina Grad]

You did. Thanks, everybody. Well, the Porky Pig greeter came up.

[Travis Corkery]

Wait, what did you think it was called?

[Gina Grad]

The. A guy in a shirt with no pants on.

[Travis Corkery]

Yeah.

[Gina Grad]

That, to me, is Winnie the Pooing. Yes, Winnie the Pooing. That's awesome. That's gone. Of, like, husband of 21 years who's trying to get laid kind of thing. Where came from work. Yeah. With the sort of Loomis off the rose. Yeah. I didn't have any name for that.

[Travis Corkery]

I didn't know Porky Pigging.

[Gina Grad]

Was his shirt, like, buttoned all the way down, or was it, like, his junk, like, through, like, a little V on the bottom?

[Travis Corkery]

Oh, no, the V. Yes, the V.

[Gina Grad]

Oh, you were there.

[Travis Corkery]

I'm imagining it.

[Gina Grad]

Wow. Did you. Did the guy finish or you tell.

[Travis Corkery]

No, I didn't mean to help him. I was just being cordial. He said he's. He helps vanillas who are like, the first timers get comfortable with the scene. And I was like, ah, cool. So.

[Gina Grad]

But we.

[Travis Corkery]

He walked near my big rockabilly pompadour, big, thick handlebar mustache. Walked me around, showed me the swing chair and the sibian. And nobody was in there, though, so it was, like, nothing to do. It was just. It was just depressing.

[Gina Grad]

You know, it's weird.

[Travis Corkery]

Very underwhelming experience.

[Gina Grad]

You know what the best part is, is there should be a split screen between the guy who's Porky Pigging over there and then what goes on the following Monday when he's standing there going, what's it gonna take to put you in this rv? Yeah, it's. It's three years old on the registration. But it is brand new in all intents or purposes.

[Bald Brian]

Like he's retired couple and they didn't drive it that much.

[Gina Grad]

Like behind the counter at a Home Depot explaining that, you know, he can even get 20% off if you sign up the Home Depot card. Like there's some super normal, boring, shitty job that guy has. It's not like he runs a website for. For swingers or he probably on Monday goes to some job somewhere that we would deal with behind the counter at the Alamo Car rental place at the airport or something. And he's explaining that he could put you into Maxima, but the insurance would be a little bit more. But it's a nice upgrade.

[Bald Brian]

The upgrade fee is only $9 a day.

[Gina Grad]

There's something, right? Normal.

[Travis Corkery]

Yes.

[Gina Grad]

So then it makes you look around when you go about your life. What is that dude doing in the Inland Empire on a Saturday night? I know what he's doing now.

[Bald Brian]

Looking at you, Chris.

[Travis Corkery]

And you know what? I don't know if this is going to make sense to everyone. I've been watching a lot of Orange is the New Black. Has anyone seen that, ever? The warden, Mr. Caputo. That's what they all look like. So if you Google that, it'll give you a good idea. Is there like a classification of orgies?

[Gina Grad]

Like. Like. Like fat people orgies or hot people orgies or anything fetish related or anything like that?

[Travis Corkery]

This one wasn't. But I told. I told them this the other night. And this is the God's honest truth. I went with some friends that I know from Playboy, and two of them are gorgeous. They're married. That's Caputo. A lot of them look like that. All right, so. So they were actually there to help facilitate the orgy. And they got there and they wouldn't touch anybody.

[Gina Grad]

All right, everybody. Brian and I tried to get this answer on stage on Thursday to know about.

[Bald Brian]

We gave up.

[Gina Grad]

We gave up. But it wasn't your fault. We're trying to get this answer. Everyone write down the number. What constitutes an orgy? Because four people, that can be couples swinging.

[Bald Brian]

Yeah. Three people's obviously a threesome.

[Gina Grad]

That's a threesome. The four can just be a. You know, me and Lynette, you and Allison. How about it? A little rap party?

[Travis Corkery]

Okay, I'll give Lynette.

[Gina Grad]

Thanks, man. We know the bottom line. We know the bottom's gonna be in that group. I've seen. I've seen Ace in his boxer briefs. And I'm not Doing it. All right. I'm not good. Sorry, man.

[Bald Brian]

All right, Skip's calling the shots.

[Gina Grad]

Everyone right in this. Everyone write a note. Script me. Like, you may get to eat first at lunch when they pull out the buffet, but guess who the big dog is in the bedroom. Take it. All right, all right. I wrote a number down. Everyone got their number down. Yeah. I don't have a pen, but I got it in my head. I got in your head. I believe you. All right, Brian, what is your number?

[Bald Brian]

Five or more? Because four is the couple swinging, and the five is officially.

[Gina Grad]

I thought about that.

[Travis Corkery]

Gina, I don't think it's an orgy until you have at least eight people.

[Adam Carolla]

Wow.

[Bald Brian]

Ambitious.

[Gina Grad]

All right, Skip, I'm gonna go with five. Five will be the minimum, I think, because then you got, like, you know, you got the two couples, and you got the one dude, like, spanking it on the side kind of, right? Keeping everybody going.

[Bald Brian]

Spank the leader fluffing himself.

[Gina Grad]

Motivating. Yeah. What do you got, Allison? When I think of orgy, I'm thinking.

[Travis Corkery]

Like a lot of people with a minimum of eight.

[Gina Grad]

I wrote the re. I wrote seven.

[Bald Brian]

Okay.

[Gina Grad]

Because. Oh, Gary wrote seven, too. Oh, Chris has a seven. You're. You're five or seven. Here's the reason I didn't say five. Five, technically. Technically, because we're beyond a threesome and beyond couples swinging. We're into an odd number. We're into five. But I'm just saying, if you said to someone, I just got back from an orgy, and they're like, tell me all about. Well, there were five. Well, there are four others, including me. They'd kind of be disappointed. It might technically be an orgy. For me, it feels like seven and above is. Is. Is. Is. Is an orgy, but five, technically. Okay, so then you got three couples in and the one dude spanking on the side. Yeah, that's right. Okay.

[Bald Brian]

Exactly what I.

[Gina Grad]

All right, news. Ah. All right. Should we do some news?

[Travis Corkery]

Let's do it.

[Gina Grad]

Let's do it. Give me the news with crack. News with Gina Grad. Show bids. Congress tech news, sports news, world news. Give me news with Gina Grad. We're shit out of Florida. Send the news with Gina Grad.

[Travis Corkery]

I'm sorry to start with this, but it must be brought up. Representatives for the nine people killed at the Emanuel AME Church in Charleston, South Carolina, told the man accused of killing their loved ones an hour into their Bible study group that they forgive him. Judge James B. Gosnell set the bond for 21 year old white supremacist Dylann Roof at $1 million. And before the family spoke, Gosnell praised Charleston's law enforcement and said Roof's family are also victims because of his alleged crimes. There's a picture of the dashing young lad.

[Gina Grad]

All right, let's kill him. Here's the thing. Do you guys agree with this? I think everyone does this thing where it's like, well, he's racist, or then this person's homophobic, or this person hates their penis and needs it to be cut off or whatever. There's a whole bunch of different thoughts, but the number one is just crazy. And I feel like crazy then picks a category to get in with, like, he could be running with ISIS or he could be shooting up a black church. He's crazy.

[Travis Corkery]

You know, it's interesting that you say that because a lot of people are saying that and there's backlash to that. Saying it's doing what happened a disservice and an injustice. To call him crazy. Exactly. As opposed to saying he's a horrible racist.

[Gina Grad]

Well, it's kind of like when they find the guy who killed his triplets in the bathtub and then killed his wife, and then they're putting him on trial and they're trying to figure out whether he's sane or not. It's like, look, I have a little indicator of insane. Like, thinking you're Napoleon is less insane to me than drowning my kids in a bathtub and killing the wife. You understand? So it's like by virtue of the fact that we're here.

[Bald Brian]

Yeah.

[Gina Grad]

That makes you nuts. Unless there's some sort of thing where it's like, well, she was the heir to some sort of diamond fortune or something, and you're trying to collect on the blah, blah, blah, and you got a girl on the side, that's a different story. But if you just think it's a good idea to drown your sex tuplets in the bathtub, that makes you by virtue, indicator. Yeah, it's an indicator that you might be insane. And I agree there's racists out there, but I do think you have to be insane to walk into anywhere and basically execute a bunch of people. I also think you have to be sort of that way as it pertains to ISIS and things involving terrorists acts domestically or abroad. So maybe it takes away from it. But I'd like to just start calling.

[Travis Corkery]

Everyone and saying, you know, I think what. What Brian is saying too, and what I was saying was that instead of saying, okay, this country still has a lot of race problems. Look what just happened. And some people are going, well, he was just a crazy person. Everybody's fine. That's where people are getting like, no, this is a problem because it was a racial issue.

[Gina Grad]

But I wanted to. But I think you pick a. I think you're insane first and racist second. That's. Yeah, because there's plenty of racists. I mean, it's unfortunate, but there's plenty of people that hate other groups of people. But the difference is they don't. Gets to the point to where they let that take over their mind and they go to the point of murder. So there's some sort of, like, rational thinking there still. You could hate, but still be, you know, have some. Some sense of, you know, decency or rational behavior. Of course, that's like. Well, anyway, I see. I just. I only hate it because we just go. We go. I hate these guys because we go right back and see what we're living in, this horribly racist society. Whereas I think it's more crazy people than racist people. But anyway. All right.

[Travis Corkery]

And by the way, did you. I was totally ignorant of this, that he. In so many of his pictures, he has a patch of the Rhodesia flag. Are you. Were you familiar with Rhodesia? No, because I wasn't. I'm gonna get this.

[Gina Grad]

They make a hell of a dog. Yeah.

[Bald Brian]

Solid dog.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. Right.

[Bald Brian]

So the hair grows the wrong way, it looks like.

[Travis Corkery]

I think that's probably what the patch.

[Gina Grad]

When your country's own only known for shitting out a dog, that's bad times with backwards hair. What you want is, whoa. They make a hell of a fighter plane, and then we'll go down from there.

[Bald Brian]

They bred a hell of a dog once.

[Travis Corkery]

Well, I could be a little bit off on this because it was very confusing to me. But what I think it is is a fake country that some people wanted to start in Africa that's full of white supremacists. Oh, it's bizarre.

[Bald Brian]

Enterprising.

[Gina Grad]

Enterprising, yeah. Probably work out like the orgy.

[Travis Corkery]

Yeah.

[Bald Brian]

It'd be disappointing, underwhelming.

[Gina Grad]

I'd show up a bunch of doughy guys going, I thought, we're gonna have a bunch of guys look like Dolph Lundgren here. No, no, no, it's us white supremacists. Weird stretch marks on your belly. Yeah, yeah.

[Bald Brian]

It's still hot. We're still in Africa.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, yeah, that'd be. I feel like that'd be disappointing. Anytime you try to start a colony of anything, it always Disappoints.

[Bald Brian]

Yeah.

[Gina Grad]

So rhodesia never existed.

[Travis Corkery]

I don't think so. I am very confused by the idea of Rhodesia.

[Gina Grad]

Where'd the Ridgeback come from then?

[Travis Corkery]

All right, that's something we need to find out.

[Gina Grad]

By the way, if you're going to start a group of, you know, white. Whites only, maybe Africa is not the place to start. I was going to say, you know.

[Bald Brian]

They'Re really making a statement by going to Africa.

[Travis Corkery]

It's that whole.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, but I just feel like, let's move it to one of the Nordic countries. Better for recruiting. Yeah.

[Bald Brian]

Start in Orange County. Yeah. Long clip down there.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. Go down to OC and be like, how many black folks did you have to fend off today? No, none. We're still zero.

[Bald Brian]

Newport beach in the Gulf fire.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, that's right. We're talking about Newport Beach. That's right. The numbers are not in your favor.

[Travis Corkery]

Yeah, well, the search for two convicted killers in New York shifted after possible sightings 350 miles from the prison where the men escaped two weeks ago.

[Gina Grad]

Now, all right, can I say this?

[Travis Corkery]

Yeah.

[Gina Grad]

I don't know if these guys are listening, but if their family members listening, they need to kill themselves and then have their bodies disposed of so that we never find them again. Because my kids don't have a DB Cooper esque thing. Yeah, everything is sorted out. I grew up with a lot of, like, Amelia Earhart's living in Cleveland. She's 81 years old right now.

[Travis Corkery]

Where's the Lindbergh baby?

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. There was a lot of stuff and nobody could ever solve it, so. No, I mean, even in Elvis was showing up places eight years after he died. There's a lot of my kids, there's none. They don't have any of that. They don't. Everyone would.

[Bald Brian]

Tupac, maybe. That's too old for them.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. And everyone would have been done. Gone by natural causes by the time they get into that age where they can start floating the conspiracy things. These guys, they're fresh. They're fresh. If we. If they give themselves up or we shoot them and if.

[Bald Brian]

We all know.

[Gina Grad]

But if one of them just falls into a river and gets swept out the sea or something, it's always going to be floating. Oh, he's up there. And then we got good stories for when we go camping. Yeah. You see, because now we go camping, it's like, well, you know, Bruce changed his name to Caitlin. That's all we got.

[Bald Brian]

Right.

[Gina Grad]

But now we get to go up and they go. Years ago, there's Khan they say into these very ill never seen folks say if you close your eyes and listen, you can still hear his voice echoing through the trees. The wind carries. You know what I mean?

[Travis Corkery]

Yeah.

[Gina Grad]

Sit around the campfire.

[Travis Corkery]

And to add a little fuel to the story, one of them is in prison for killing and hacksawing and dismembering his boss.

[Gina Grad]

They're both really bad. Like the other one, like murdered.

[Bald Brian]

Like he's in New York, right?

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, I was looking up there.

[Bald Brian]

Are these your clients? Are these your.

[Travis Corkery]

No, no, but they're both really, really bad.

[Gina Grad]

Similar, Similar type of dudes. Yeah, I'll tell my kids. Yeah, Skip here, I've been like at home alone. I go from like room to room with the gun because I'm thinking if they like break in my house. Well, just, just to let you know, there is a bigger arsenal in our house than there is in most army barracks. So, yes, anyone that comes into our house most likely will not exit.

[Bald Brian]

Sure.

[Gina Grad]

Especially taking a shower at home alone.

[Travis Corkery]

Do you know what, where Friendship New York is? Because that's where they're looking right now.

[Gina Grad]

Upstate.

[Travis Corkery]

Yeah, about 350 miles from the prison.

[Gina Grad]

So there's about just where you expect them to hide. Well, that's where all the prisons are. They're all up, right? Yeah, yeah, but these guys are mobile, man.

[Travis Corkery]

Yeah, about 800 law enforcement officers have been looking for them. And they're looking in a radius right around the Adirondacks.

[Gina Grad]

Well, let's hope again they never find the one.

[Bald Brian]

Right.

[Gina Grad]

Who hacked the boss. The boss. And then I will, I will sit and tell a story about, you know, he didn't like happy campers, but he was definitely what you call disgruntled. You just pull out the hacksaw. He is the definition of disgruntled. Like some people piss in the coffee pot at work. He laughs at those people.

[Bald Brian]

That's a good starter right there.

[Gina Grad]

Take up like two parts parking spaces. He scoffs at those people. This is the very essence of disgruntled employee. But anyway, they say he still roams these hills with his hacksaw. You should tell the story how the prop. You pull out the hacksaw. Of course.

[Travis Corkery]

By the way, I heard, I think it was on npr, they were talking about this. Do you know how many, how many convicts that are escaped that are still at large supposedly in this country?

[Gina Grad]

Oh, really?

[Travis Corkery]

I have. This is a great number.

[Bald Brian]

Better than less than.

[Gina Grad]

That's the only one I would have thought. Almost. I feel like almost everyone gets caught immediately.

[Bald Brian]

Now there's still some at large.

[Travis Corkery]

Take a guess.

[Gina Grad]

Well, now, according to the range, that way.

[Bald Brian]

Yeah.

[Gina Grad]

1200?

[Bald Brian]

I was gonna say way less like a hundred.

[Gina Grad]

Well, I would have thought that. Yeah. What do we got?

[Travis Corkery]

138.

[Gina Grad]

Damn.

[Bald Brian]

Bitch.

[Gina Grad]

Busted out of prison.

[Travis Corkery]

That we're still looking for, apparently.

[Gina Grad]

Wow. Yeah.

[Travis Corkery]

So, good night, everybody.

[Gina Grad]

Sleep well. Sleep tight.

[Bald Brian]

Maybe Alison will lay some for guns.

[Travis Corkery]

Well, users of the navigation app Waze can now get turn by turn directions from the Terminator. This week, the Google owned company. Yes. Announced. Do you announced that Arnold Schwarzenegger has lent his voice to the app as part of a promotion campaign for the upcoming Terminator Genesis, which opens in theaters on July 1st. With the new features, users can navigate the journey to Schwarzenegger's voice commands with phrases like, I'm looking for Sarah Connor, but we can go to your destination first and mission accomplished. It has to end here.

[Gina Grad]

But he's not telling you when to go left.

[Travis Corkery]

He says turn left and turn right.

[Gina Grad]

But then no street names.

[Travis Corkery]

Yeah, that's true.

[Gina Grad]

Here's a little taste.

[Travis Corkery]

Here's a little taste of what it sounds like.

[Gina Grad]

I swear I will get you to your destination. Trust me. Make a U turn. This is a mission priority. And then turn right. Turn right. Hazard reported ahead. Get down.

[Travis Corkery]

Unsafe.

[Gina Grad]

His acting isn't unbelievable. I'd like to get pasta la vista, baby.

[Bald Brian]

I got a brook in the the Miller.

[Gina Grad]

Get to the chopper. Yeah, I told you about the picture we took of him with him at the gym the other day. Yeah. We were at Gold's Venice beach. And I got him to come over and take a picture. And Alison had the phone. She was going to take the picture.

[Travis Corkery]

I wanted to get in the picture.

[Gina Grad]

So I didn't know this. I finally grabbed McDonald's. Take the picture. And I'm standing next to him, my arm around him, and he leans into me. He goes, where's the camera? And I'm looking around for Allison in front of me. She's nowhere to be found. And then I look on the other side of him and there she is, like, hugging him. And I'm like, who's going to take the. What are you doing? And I knew there was about a half a second until he was going to walk away. Where's the camera? Yeah, he was, like, pissed because he wanted to get out of there. But when he saw that there wasn't an immediate reaction to take the picture.

[Travis Corkery]

He was like, do you have the picture? Oh, yeah, I got to see that.

[Gina Grad]

Who is. We'll put that up on the site. He's got to be top 10 of the last.

[Allison Rosen]

Oh, there it is.

[Gina Grad]

50 years of folks taking, stopping to take pictures with.

[Bald Brian]

Yes. He's not, he's not confused on the street for someone else.

[Gina Grad]

No. Between the accent and the guns, he is.

[Travis Corkery]

However, he has been confused for a wax statue of himself because that prank had been happening last year.

[Allison Rosen]

Who was that for?

[Travis Corkery]

Was that for Fallon or.

[Bald Brian]

I don't know who was, but it was Schwarzenegger.

[Travis Corkery]

Yeah, yeah.

[Bald Brian]

Posing as the wax statue.

[Travis Corkery]

As his own wax statue. People bought it hook, line and sinker.

[Gina Grad]

That's how you know you've arrived, by the way. All right, let's, let's do one more.

[Travis Corkery]

30 seconds to Mars has spent a long time building and nurturing its fan base. And now they're sending them to summer camp. The rock band fronted by Jared Leto is hosting a three day and two night weekend in Malibu, California called Camp Mars. That will lead attendees through activities like cooking, hiking and meditating in a semi rustic setting. There will also be a 30 seconds to Mars performance and some DJ sets. The price for the camp for the two days ranges anywhere from 800 to $2,000.

[Gina Grad]

I want to talk to Jared Leto and just go, what do you know that I don't know what's going on?

[Bald Brian]

What do you think he knows?

[Gina Grad]

I don't know. I feel like I just, I get up in the morning, I'm tired, I fucking have a breakfast bar and some coffee, go to work and then I come home and then I watch TV and then I go to work again. Why is he out living 10 lives?

[Allison Rosen]

Because he's so pretty.

[Gina Grad]

I just feel like he's everywhere. And what's going on with nobody working anymore? It's like you turn on these like, you know, TMZ or Access Hollywood. It's like, oh, Rihanna spotted again. This time the south of France and she's with Justin Bieber, she's on his shoulders and all this stuff is like, at some point doesn't somebody have to start a tour? Well, that's what I'm thinking, going to the studio or something. Like we went to Crustacean, we caught up with and it's. Everyone's out to dinner every night, everyone's on vacation, everyone's in the south of France, everyone's at Bonnaroo. Like everyone's at every event. Everyone's everywhere. Oh, guess U2 concert was in town. Guess it was front row. And why every event? Every night, somewhere, something, at some point you gotta work, right?

[Bald Brian]

My theory, two things One, I think this camp is a way to get the band paid because Jared Letta's off making movies, he's off doing Hollywood shit.

[Travis Corkery]

His brother Shannon and the other guy, there's three guys, fans getting paid.

[Bald Brian]

Number two, when you're doing well, he works probably a month on a movie, and then he gets paid a shitload of money and takes two months off. You know what I mean? He's had a lot of downtime when you're Rihanna or when you're Jared Leto. A lot of downtime.

[Gina Grad]

You work hard for a long time. I get it. I know there's a lot of downtime, but I feel like I've seen pictures of Rihanna everywhere, but in a studio or on a tour. I've seen her at everyone else's Elsa's concert, but her own concert. Like, I get it. She's got funny money, but did it like, I don't know, back in the day. Back in the day. That's my whole thing. It's like, all right, you take Frank Sinatra, he was as big as they got. Or Elvis or whoever. But it was constant. Like, well, Elvis is doing a special from Hawaii. Elvis is touring the rat packs in Vegas. You know, everyone was working. I could feel like there was. They're making movies and then they're doing shows at night, whatever it is. I just felt like people work now. It's like, everyone. I've seen Justin Bieber everywhere, but never, like, doing his own thing.

[Bald Brian]

I think Rihanna's got that sweet, sweet, like Maybelline money or Revlon, whoever it is, that's Mailbox a shoot for a day for me or whoever Revlon is.

[Gina Grad]

Well, now these people just hold up their iPhone and like, do like a selfie and. Or like a quick little video and put it on YouTube and it's like, you know, they just made like 20 grand for like a five minute video. But do you guys, as is civilians who work? Yes. Is it depressing just to find out where everyone is all the time doing something and never like Cindy Crawford and her husband always somewhere? Never feel like here at work. I. I'm just saying, she was a.

[Bald Brian]

She was a supermodel for 15 years. Number one for 10, 15 years.

[Gina Grad]

She can fucking do everything. Can I say that?

[Bald Brian]

Sorry. Showing your point.

[Gina Grad]

Tmz. No, I get it. They're set. They're set. But Sinatra was set too. And he was 67 and still out hustling, you know what I'm saying? Like, all I'm just saying is, is if you're tmz, or Access Hollywood or something. Could you just have a shot of Rihanna just leaving the post office or the dmv or just. Well, she's coming. She. She's going into the studio. It's 7:30 in the morning. Boy, is she tired. That's all I want. Just a little something.

[Bald Brian]

Okay.

[Gina Grad]

Okay, that's all I'm looking for, if you must. Tell you what you guys should look for. Nest Cam. Man, these guys are smart. This thing just came out. So we got the Nest, I got the thermostat, I got the Nest thermostat. So I have three of them.

[Travis Corkery]

Oh, this is that future looking.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, those things are awesome. Oh, they're nice and digital and they're blue and they turn different, different colors and they have the action skip.

[Bald Brian]

You must install some of these.

[Gina Grad]

The action is nice. That's the way to go. Everything is all high tech, automated. It learns your habits. But now they got the Nest Cam. So it's a security and it streams in HD video and you can put it on your phone, your tablet, your laptop so you could see if one of those escape cons was back at your place right now, right on your smartphone takes about 60 seconds to set up. You just plug it in, you download the Nest app, you get alerts on your phone when there's motion. That's awesome.

[Bald Brian]

Well, that's good and bad. You're like, what, what?

[Gina Grad]

The gardener's doing a shoulder roll on your wife? Yeah.

[Bald Brian]

It's a very detailed report.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, I picked that up with a certain amount of trepidation. That's great. Molly farted. Anyway, you get the Nest and here's what you do. Free shipping when you buy nest cam from Nest.com that's Nest.com. so this is brand new, state of the art technology. And again, it's kind of one of these things where anyone who made that Nest thermostat, I will take whatever it is they have.

[Travis Corkery]

Nest, you're on board.

[Gina Grad]

And this is it. Nest Cam, Nest.com. all right, let's do one more.

[Travis Corkery]

Well, right on the heels of the Nest Cam, an airport in and Sweden has built climate pods so you can actually feel what the weather is like, where you're traveling to.

[Gina Grad]

That would be a great thing to fart out. I just thought of it.

[Travis Corkery]

Stockholm Orlando Airport has three climate portals that simulate different climates around the world in real time. They do this with heaters, air conditioners, wind simulators and misters and all kinds of things. You just get in and you know where you're going. Why not? That seems like a tremendous waste of money.

[Bald Brian]

You've already packed. It's like not going to help you.

[Gina Grad]

See what your fart smells like in Aruba.

[Travis Corkery]

Maybe they're, maybe they're in cahoots with the gift shop, the duty free people.

[Gina Grad]

You would so do that. Oh yeah, I'd be farting all over the world, man. You do it in this country. All over the place. The Eiffel Tower. This is clearly whitey out of problems, right?

[Bald Brian]

This is Stockholm.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. Dreams, whities, every problem. Too much fucking time on your head. You get people from Colombia or Africa and try to explain to them what this is. They wouldn't even know what the fuck you're talking about. Right. They need a pod that simulated being on top of a train for transportation.

[Bald Brian]

Can you see them having drinkable water?

[Gina Grad]

Here's one that this, this is going to simulate a truck inner tube and you floating to safety, simulates having a meal on your table. Do we even need, by the way the fact that the plane is a steady 71 degrees and pressurized and it's a nine hour flight, doesn't that fuck up the whole premise of here's what it's going to be like where you're at.

[Travis Corkery]

That's its own climate pod.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. Your plane is a climate pod which shall be different than from wherever you land. Right?

[Travis Corkery]

Yes.

[Gina Grad]

So how are you going to carry any climate momentum into your acclimated into what it's going to be like in Rhodesia it's a white out, there's a cross burning going on, it's 117 degrees. But either way you're, you do that. But then you get in the airplane which is climate controlled for 10 hours and then you fucked up your climate experience.

[Travis Corkery]

Think about if it was like really if it had like something that let.

[Gina Grad]

Out a scent and it always almost.

[Travis Corkery]

Like a planetarium on the inside so you can be surrounded by what it visually looks like. You could smell it and then you feel it.

[Gina Grad]

That's an experience.

[Travis Corkery]

What the is that spraying you with water?

[Gina Grad]

Smell it. Yeah, he always says that after he farts. All right, one more.

[Bald Brian]

You lady killer, you.

[Gina Grad]

It's gotten to that point, Brian is just smell it. I don't try to hide it anymore. Walmart, Smell it. Yeah, we'll be shopping somewhere and that's what I'll hear in the next aisle.

[Travis Corkery]

That's love.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah. Why, why try to hide it? She's gonna smell it. So I'm just. Now I'm telling her to smell it before she actually does, so I have some control of the situation.

[Travis Corkery]

Oh, my God.

[Bald Brian]

When this whole contractor show goes away. Relationship advice. Yes.

[Gina Grad]

I'm saying, man, you know, you gotta be proactive, baby.

[Travis Corkery]

Speaking of bodily fluids, now that the weather is heating up and people are turning to the swimming pool to beat the heat, there's something you should know. A study shows that the red eyes you get in some swimming pools is not caused by chlorine, it's caused by urine. Evidently, the chlorine binds to it all the things it's trying to kill from your bodies, and it forms chemical irritants. That's why your eyes sting. It's the chlorine binding to things like urine and sometimes sweat, but mostly urine.

[Gina Grad]

That's disgusting.

[Travis Corkery]

So now we all know why our eyes are red.

[Gina Grad]

Occasionally. Semen. Yep. There's a new thing going on at my house. I don't know if my kids are like, we want to go in the swimming pool. Last night we're going swimming. All right. Go swimming. Oh, you're. Come on, daddy, you're coming with us. You know? And I'm like, why do this? Having a pool was way more than enough. My neighbor Max Truax had a pool. The Corolla's never had a pool. But my neighbor had a pool going to his house and swimming. I didn't get have to get my lazy fucking sack of shit dad to get, dad, come on in the pool with us. Like, no, I didn't even want him there.

[Bald Brian]

That's interesting. When I was a kid, the 20 times I had the opportunity to go swimming in a pool, I was one of my parents to come in the pool with me when we were on vacation. I was the same way. I was like, come on, mom and dad, jump in.

[Gina Grad]

Blah, blah. Almost didn't shit on a point. But wait a minute.

[Bald Brian]

I'm saying that must be universal. I never thought about it till just now.

[Gina Grad]

What do my kids want? I didn't. I didn't give a fuck. I had a pool. Like, why would I need my parents?

[Bald Brian]

I don't know why.

[Gina Grad]

Imagine we had a different relationship. But I mean, my parents, my daughter would be like, I want to go in the pool. And I'll be like, go in the pool. You have a yard with a pool. And she'll be like, you're coming with me. And I'm like, I'll sit and listen to some Muzak and watch you. I'll drink a beer and you'll be in the pool. No, you're coming with me. Come On. You're coming. We're jumping in together. It was like, a lot. That's how you were when I was a little kid.

[Bald Brian]

Oh, my dad. Come in, throw me around or whatever.

[Travis Corkery]

You know what it is? It's guaranteed focused attention because you only have that small space. No, that's what I'm saying. You're saying this is pool. Yeah, but now you're in the pool in your backyard.

[Gina Grad]

Go enjoy it.

[Bald Brian]

I don't know, man. No logical explanation for it.

[Gina Grad]

Oh, my God. And God forbid I just pull up my shorts there. It's like, you gotta get. Come on, you're getting in, getting in. You're getting in. It's like I'm. I bought you the pool, number one. I pay for the maintenance of it, and I'm sitting next to it watching you do almost nothing in it. Is that.

[Travis Corkery]

That's why you were there, for the entertainment? You got to throw her around, spin her around, get on the shoulder, throw.

[Gina Grad]

Her in last night.

[Travis Corkery]

You don't take that as a compliment that she wants you there with her.

[Gina Grad]

Yeah, I'm sure. The same way Arnold takes as a compliment when these two yahoos want to take a picture and no one knows how to work the camera, it is a compliment.

[Bald Brian]

I've really reached the pinnacle of the mountain.

[Gina Grad]

No, it's a compl. Yes, it's a compliment I'd like to do without. It's basically what I'm saying. Same way Arnold should be taken as a compliment. He just wants to get out to the Humvee and make tracks. That's what he wants. That's what I want. You see what I'm saying? It is a compliment when you dissect it. I understand.

[Travis Corkery]

When you get down to it, you.

[Gina Grad]

Can join the ranks of the greats. The Bishop family.

[Bald Brian]

That's right.

[Gina Grad]

Awesome. Speaking of humvees, man, govplanet.com is where you go. They're having a big auction. It's cargo trucks. It's Humvees. Real ones, man. Surplus stuff. Yeah, all the surplus stuff. The stuff we already paid for. It's the greatest racket in the world. We pay racket? Yeah. We pay retail. And you buy it at pennies on the dollar. They got a Humvee sale coming up June 24th. That's this Wednesday. Got a huge selection of four by fours, and all stuff military, all the stuff, whatever you want. You can preview the items. You can see photos, you can bid directly from your mobile device. Just text the word ACE 5 11, 511 and register. Just see what they got. I mean, honestly, I don't know what a humvee cost us five years ago, but it had to be 80 grand, 150 grand. Whatever it is, now you're getting it for again, pennies, maybe nickels on the dollar. Register on govplanet.com and it's free. Just text ACE to 511-511- Text Text ACE to 511-511 govplanet.com all right, movies out. Go to Amazon. We'll award a new Lord of the Jungle recipient coming out. You can tweet us a picture of your receipt. I will see you guys tomorrow on set. We're wrapping it up. Another great season of Catch A Contract. A new episode, 10 o'clock Sunday night. Spike. I think this season's gonna come out really good. This season is going to be awesome with that new, new filming that they're doing. It's going to be great. Yeah, a lot of new wrinkles going on and it's all good. So that also you can twitter or tweet Skip at Skip, underscore, Videl, Allison as well. B, E, D, E, L, L. And until next time, Sam Crawl for Allison and Skip and Gina and bald Saiyan Mahala. I heart chugging cock.

[Bald Brian]

All right, that is it for today's crawl of classics.

[Skip Bedell]

Until tomorrow and get it off.

[Gina Grad]

Pluto TV is the place for movie.

[Allison Rosen]

Fans like me and TV fans like me.

[Gina Grad]

They've got something for everyone and it's totally free.

[Allison Rosen]

You can binge laugh out loud sitcoms.

[Gina Grad]

Like Frasier and rewatch cult classics like Higher Learning. Whether you're in the mood to solve.

[Bald Brian]

A little crime before bedtime with NCIS.

[Gina Grad]

Or Tracker or curl up with a surefire hit like Forrest Gump. Run Forrest. Pluto TV has thousands of movies and shows, all for free. Pluto TV stream now pay Never.