Mike Judge + James Tupper (Carolla Classics)

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Adam Carolla Show – "Mike Judge + James Tupper (Carolla Classics)"

Release Date: May 17, 2025

Introduction

In this episode of The Adam Carolla Show, hosted by PodcastOne / Carolla Digital, fans are treated to a special segment from the Carolla Classics series. This episode features highlights from Show 581, which originally aired in 2011, and culminates with an engaging conversation between Adam Carolla and comedian/actor James Tupper. The episode delves into a variety of topics, blending Adam's signature humor with candid discussions on pop culture, personal anecdotes, and societal issues.

Section 1: Introduction to Carolla Classics

At the outset (01:15), Giovanni introduces Carolla Classics, a segment dedicated to showcasing the best moments from the past 16 years of The Adam Carolla Show. Highlights include memorable clips, fan-selected segments, and standout conversations with notable guests. Listeners are encouraged to request clips via email and access ad-free archives through PodcastOne Premium.

Section 2: Highlights from Show 581

Topic A: Shaquille O'Neal’s Retirement Commentary

The discussion kicks off with Adam's humorous take on Shaquille O'Neal’s retirement announcement (03:52). Adam mocks the idea of Shaq as a long-playing athlete, exaggerating the notion that Shaq might continue playing basketball indefinitely despite age and health concerns.

Adam Carolla (04:07): "Shaq's gonna be one of those dinosleep of sleep apnea things when he's 49 and a half or something."

Topic B: Wienergate and Privacy Intrusions

The conversation shifts to Wienergate, a controversial incident involving Anthony Weiner. Adam critiques the overblown reaction from authorities and media, emphasizing that personal pranks should remain personal without federal intervention.

Adam Carolla (08:05): "I think it’s fair to ask some of these questions. It was a prank. … We have to be careful not to take this out of context."

Topic C: Gender Roles and Parenting

A significant portion of the conversation centers around contemporary gender roles and parenting practices (13:00). Allison Rosen introduces a Canadian couple who chose to keep their infant's gender a secret to prevent societal gender biases. Adam vehemently opposes such practices, advocating for traditional gender roles and expressing frustration over modern shifts in parenting.

Adam Carolla (14:00): "Do whatever the fuck you want. Fuck up your kids. Go ahead. … Fuck all this fucking gender bullshit."

Topic D: Circumcision Debate in Santa Monica

Allison Rosen brings up the Male Genital Mutilation (MGM) bill being voted on in Santa Monica (20:01). The bill aims to ban circumcision for males under 18, sparking heated debates about bodily autonomy and cultural/religious practices.

Allison Rosen (24:19): "Parents are really guardians, and guardians have to do what's in the best interest of the child. Circumcising a child is child abuse."

Adam dismisses the significance of the bill, arguing that society has larger issues to address and that the focus on circumcision is trivial in the grand scheme.

Adam Carolla (24:33): "Who gives a fuck? Do whatever the fuck you want."

Section 3: Game Segment – "What Can Adam Complain About?"

In this interactive segment, listeners submit topics for Adam to rant about. The examples from the transcript include:

• Health Updates: Giovanni shares personal health victories, prompting Adam to humorously downplay them.

Giovanni (36:33): "Maybe this is a dirty pool, but I'll bet you can't complain about me getting good MRI results and finding out my tumor's shrinking."

• Travelling and Living Conditions: Accounts of living in Seattle, dealing with weather, and interactions with locals.

• Animal Rights and Personal Challenges: Discussion on celebrities like Mark Zuckerberg tackling personal challenges such as reducing meat consumption, leading to humorous deadpan critiques by Adam.

Adam Carolla (24:19): "200 billion cocks can’t be wrong, and 200 billion uncut cocks can’t be wrong. So who gives a shit?"

Section 4: Advertising and Sponsorships

Throughout the episode, advertisements are seamlessly integrated into the conversation. Prominent sponsors include:

• Mint Mobile: Promoted at the beginning (00:00).
• Triton Digital’s A2X: Discussed shortly after (00:37).
• Amazon: Adam encourages listeners to support the show by shopping through Amazon links, earning small commissions.

Adam Carolla (35:32): "Just click through our link and bookmark them and they'll give us a couple percentage points."

• Evoice: Featured towards the end, offering a free six-month trial for a virtual phone number.

Adam Carolla (122:00): "Go to evoice.com AdamCarolla and check it out."

Section 5: Transition to "Mike Judge + James Tupper" Segment

As the segment progresses, the focus shifts towards introducing the upcoming conversation with Mike Judge and James Tupper (85:12). Mike Judge, best known for creating Beavis and Butt-Head and King of the Hill, joins the show to discuss his work and current projects.

Section 6: Interview with Mike Judge and James Tupper

Topic A: Creation of Beavis and Butt-Head

James Tupper recounts the origins of Beavis and Butt-Head, highlighting the creative process and the challenges faced during its inception.

James Tupper (117:43): "I made that short and then I made another one where they go to the monster truck show."

Topic B: Challenges in the Entertainment Industry

The discussion delves into the complexities of creating and maintaining successful shows in a competitive industry. James emphasizes the importance of ownership and the long-term benefits of negotiating rights early on.

James Tupper (120:19): "Nobody would have heard of me. I would never have gotten King of the Hill and all this other stuff."

Topic C: Mike Judge’s Work Ethic and Personality

Adam probes into Mike Judge's reserved nature despite his success, questioning whether Mike Judge prefers to stay out of the limelight.

Adam Carolla (125:53): "Is it something you just prefer not to go down?"

James Tupper (129:46): "I think comedy's like that a little bit. You have to kind of figure it out."

Topic D: Future Projects and Collaborations

The conversation touches upon upcoming projects, including a new Beavis and Butt-Head series and potential collaborations between Adam Carolla and Mike Judge.

Adam Carolla (138:23): "Mike is premiering Beavis and Butthead. It’s returning to MTV October 27th and 10 o'clock, 9 o'clock central, and 24 new episodes."

Notable Quotes

1. Adam Carolla on Gender Roles (14:00):

   "Do whatever the fuck you want. Fuck up your kids. Go ahead."

2. Adam Carolla on Circumcision (25:24):

   "Half the world is circumcised. The other half isn't, or three quarters aren't. One quarter is. Either way, no one gives a fuck."

3. James Tupper on Beavis and Butt-Head’s Success (120:19):

   "If I hadn't sold it to MTV, I wouldn't have made a couple more short films. Nobody would have heard of me."

4. Adam Carolla on Celebrity Recognition (131:53):

   "It's like, you know, you have to do something like, hey, man, I don't know if you've checked out this flick called the Hangover. But then, because everyone else goes, I saw that movie nine times, dickhead."

Conclusion

This episode of The Adam Carolla Show offers a nostalgic trip through past highlights while seamlessly introducing contemporary discussions with notable figures like Mike Judge and James Tupper. From humorous takes on celebrity news to deep dives into societal norms and the intricacies of the entertainment industry, Adam Carolla maintains his trademark blend of sharp wit and candid conversation. Listeners are left entertained and informed, bridging the gap between longstanding fans and newcomers to the show.

Key Takeaways:

• Humorous Critique of Celebrity Culture: Adam consistently uses humor to dissect and critique the actions and societal roles of celebrities like Shaquille O'Neal and Mark Zuckerberg.

• Engagement with Societal Issues: Topics such as gender roles in parenting and circumcision debates highlight the show's willingness to tackle controversial and contemporary issues.

• Interactive Segments: Games like "What Can Adam Complain About?" foster listener engagement and provide a platform for diverse topics and humor.

• Insights into the Entertainment Industry: The interview with James Tupper offers valuable insights into the creation and sustainability of successful shows like Beavis and Butt-Head and King of the Hill.

• Seamless Sponsorship Integration: Advertisements are woven naturally into the conversation, maintaining listener interest without detracting from content quality.

Overall, this episode exemplifies The Adam Carolla Show's commitment to delivering a mix of humor, insightful discussions, and engaging content, ensuring its position as a beloved daily podcast among millions of listeners worldwide.

Transcript

[Adam Carolla]

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[Giovanni]

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[Adam Carolla]

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[Allison Rosen]

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[Adam Carolla]

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[Allison Rosen]

Visit www.tritondigital.com to learn more.

[Giovanni]

Welcome to Corolla Classics. I'm your host, superfan Giovanni. This is the podcast where we play the best moments highlights on fans selected clips from all 16 years of the Adam Carolla Show.

[Adam Carolla]

If you'd like to request a clip.

[Giovanni]

Please email us classicsamcoroll.com we have a separate podcast feed titled Corolla Classics with ad free archives exclusively available through Podcast One Premium. You can also find ad free archives for the Adam Carolla show, The Adam and Dr. Drew show, as well as exclusive access to the brand new show Beat it out through Adam Corolla substack adamcorolla.substack.com let's get to the clips.

[Adam Carolla]

Come up first.

[Giovanni]

We have Adam Carolla show 581 James Tupper, Allison Rosen, Brian Bishop 2011 hope you guys enjoy.

[Adam Carolla]

I do my this week in Rage over on Kevin and Bean and I used to get up a half hour early and get my shit together. Now I just get up about three minutes early.

[Allison Rosen]

Do you find the rage comes quicker?

[Adam Carolla]

It's weird doing comedy early, like when you're really asleep. It's a weird, it's a weird thing. It's like I it's like brandy is good and cigars are good, but not at 6:55 in the morning. When you went to bed at 1. It feels weird, but popped up this morning, did a bunch of morning radio and then did what I'm very good at, which is going back to bed for 45 minutes and then getting up and going and doing my car show gig, which is so far so good. Working out quite nicely that should hit the air sometime in July. So look forward to that. All right, Paul Bryant's here. Allison's here. We're gonna do what can Adam complain about the staff, Ed? First we'll do some news and I should tell everyone San Diego House of Blues tonight, see how the fudge is packed. Dana Gould is going to be there. We will be bringing you a live podcast. That's right. We're all making the pilgrimage out to the House of Blues in San Diego. And we're doing the show Irvine. Also Sunday, June 5th. Does say June 5th from here, right?

[Allison Rosen]

Yes, it does.

[Adam Carolla]

All live and live in the podcast and the palace of Fine Arts, San Francisco. Here's the deal, people. Not many tickets left to that. Did not add a second show. So just the one show. And they're almost gone. So if you want to check me out doing stand up in San Francisco. Well get your tickets now. Saturday, June 4, palace of Fine Arts. All right, now, Allison Rosen and her news live from the International News center next to Donnie's mini bikes. This is the news with Allison Rosen.

[Allison Rosen]

Shaq announced his retirement today on Twitter and he posted a twit vid little video on Twitter. So we're gonna watch that.

[Adam Carolla]

Shaq's gonna be one of those dinosleep of sleep apnea things when he's 49 and a half or something.

[Giovanni]

Or like Lu Alcindor and be the one big guy that goes on forever defying Adam Corella.

[Adam Carolla]

They gotta be vegetarians and super skinny. Shaq retired three years ago, Right. He just got paid to play basketball. Right.

[Giovanni]

He stopped playing basketball effectively.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. I knew it was over for him when they did that ABC series, like summer replacement series when it was like Shaq one on one. Shaq versus Shaq's going Shaq versus Oscar De La Hoya in boxing, Shaq versus Tony Hawk and skateboarding. And then Shaq versus Ben Roethlisberger in basketball. And Big Ben, the guy with brain damage, the white guy with brain damage beat Shaq in basketball. And it was like, oh, that's not a good sign, right? The whole thing was you're supposed to enter their sport. And Shaq, I mean, it wasn't. He didn't post up on him, but it was like, you know, just a game of whores.

[Giovanni]

It was always like Shaq had an unnatural advantage here. Like when he took on Albert Pujols in a home run hitting contest. Shaq had a 200 foot fence. They put Albert Pools back about 400ft, right?

[Adam Carolla]

But Shaq literally got beat by Ben Roethlisberger moments after he got into an accident with a motorcycle. Literally. Big Ben beat him in a game of whores. And I know Shaq's an inside player and all that kind of stuff, but the fact is, Shaq has been playing hoops for 25 years. Big Ben played, but Big Ben plays football, and he should not be beating Shaq at the game. Shaq is going in probably into the hall of Fame for.

[Giovanni]

Right, Definitely.

[Adam Carolla]

Hall of Fame, Definitely.

[Giovanni]

There's some shady beginnings to this show, too. It was originally called. Well, there was originally a show pitched by Steve Nash called Steve Nash versus Hear about this. And of course, Steve Nash and Shaq happened to be teammates in Phoenix. And then, lo and behold, Steve Nash pops up as an executive producer on this show. Word around 10 is Shaq stole his idea.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, originally, Todd Bridges was gonna get together with Steve Nash and do something called Nash Br. But they. Thank you. Yeah.

[Allison Rosen]

Is there anyone whose last name is Ville. Nashville? Anyway, did you. Deborah Norville all of those?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Allison Rosen]

What did you want to see? Shaq's retirement.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, yeah, Sorry. Hold on. That's him getting beat by Ben Ronsberg. Yeah. Sorry.

[Allison Rosen]

We did it.

[Adam Carolla]

19 years, baby.

[James Tupper]

Want to. Thank you very much. That's why I'm telling you first. I'm about to retire.

[Adam Carolla]

Love you.

[James Tupper]

Talk to you soon.

[Allison Rosen]

He's talking to himself in the mirror.

[Adam Carolla]

I understand, but considering how much punishment.

[Giovanni]

He took, that's a long time to play basketball.

[Adam Carolla]

19 years.

[Giovanni]

He took a. For a big guy. You know what I'm saying? People hack the. Hack a Shack thing. People beat him up for 19 years.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, well, he was always. He was the biggest dude on the floor, so. Still is. And I guess people are going to start fouling you if they figure out you can make a layup but you can't make a free throw. They're going to do that math pretty quick. Yeah.

[Allison Rosen]

I also like how his retirement is sort of like what you'd write in a yearbook in high school. We did it. We made it. Yeah, Kit, we'll rule the school next year.

[Adam Carolla]

Hack a Shack was a black version of Whack a Mole.

[Allison Rosen]

I never really liked that game.

[Adam Carolla]

I didn't like it either.

[Allison Rosen]

Yeah. I could never whack the moles.

[Adam Carolla]

Not only was I not good at it, but, you know, as a Jew, you're probably thinking about skin moles as well. Number one, Skin tags. Skin tags.

[Allison Rosen]

Hello.

[Adam Carolla]

Hello. And number two, hitting moles with a mallet just didn't feel like this. Didn't feel like A good time to me. No, but it's nice to see Jake Busey's enjoying it. It just.

[Allison Rosen]

I felt like the mallet, it just didn't feel fun.

[Giovanni]

That's not Bryan Adams.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, maybe you're right.

[Allison Rosen]

Like pole position or any driving game. That was fun. But that holding that big mallet and whacking things, not fun.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Allison Rosen]

Anthony Weiner. We discussed yesterday, Wienergate. He broke his silence and we have a video of him talking about what happened with the photo of someone's Johnson that was posted.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, we'll see what winds up coming back from the firm that's looking at a couple of things to keep in mind. This wasn't my government account. We don't know exactly what happened here. It was a prank. You know, it is not a national security thing. I'm not sure I want to put national federal resources into trying to figure out who posted a picture on Wiener's website of whatever. I'm not really sure it rises, no pun intended, to that level. And let me just say one other thing is I think it's fair and reasonable to ask some of these questions. It was a prank. Still, I think it's fair to ask the question. I think we have to be careful not to take this out of context. This is not a national security matter. This is not a. An instance. We're not making a federal case out of this, and I don't think anyone else should. But the things I do want to work on here in Congress are being interrupted by this, which I think was the intention of the person that did it to begin with.

[Allison Rosen]

So he hired a private security company to investigate.

[Adam Carolla]

Let me.

[Allison Rosen]

Whether his account was hacked.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. And by the way, I'm. I'm now picturing a bloodhound napping on a porch somewhere in Kentucky. Like, that's the security company. Private security company. Let me explain why this is his wiener and why he did this. When you have to look at it.

[Allison Rosen]

This way, he did it.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, yes. Here's why. And then I'll take 20 minutes to explain why. I don't give a fuck. The point is, if you're going to do a prank, just 20. On somebody. Yeah. We'll make it brief. Yeah. Wrap it up. If you're gonna do a prank like this kind of a prank, you do something like this, you don't take a picture of a guy with his underpants on.

[Allison Rosen]

Right.

[Adam Carolla]

You do it right. You sort of do it. Right.

[Allison Rosen]

Right.

[Adam Carolla]

You know what I mean? It's like if you have a picture of someone you draw a cock on them. You don't draw underpants with the cock inside. Like you're gonna fuck with somebody. Like you're gonna do something. You're gonna get fuck around Photoshop or you're gonna do something and you take a picture of a wang. This is fairly innocuous. This is a guy wearing midways.

[Allison Rosen]

I mean, it's like a Funky Bunch video.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, it really is Marky Mark esque. And who.

[Allison Rosen]

Who.

[Adam Carolla]

Those. That was the white. That was the wide receiving corps for the Washington redskins in the 80s, was it not the Marx Brothers? No, that's Dalton, damn it. Yeah, but those are the Marky Marks Brothers. I think they were called the Fun Bunch. Over in the Washington runs. Somebody look that up. Or you can walk back and ask Donnie, he'll know it off top and say, art Monk. And I'm laughing because. Making fun of Donnie, because Donnie, when we put the shoulder pads on him in the helmet at the Dallas stadium and everyone gathered around him and told him, he was like, lucas, yeah, the Fun Bunch. And someone told him, strike up the Heisman pose. He held the ball over his head with both hands and then he set it on the ground in front of it. And there's a Donnie, the Heisman pose. And he went, I don't know what that is.

[Allison Rosen]

Oh, Donnie.

[Adam Carolla]

Cool. Yeah.

[Allison Rosen]

Donnie and the Kush.

[Adam Carolla]

Donnie and the Kush. Yeah. Now that would be. That'd be a movie I'd watch.

[Allison Rosen]

Donnie and the Kush.

[Adam Carolla]

That's a good. That'd be a good. Coming. There's Donnie. All right, now where the fuck were we? Yes. If you're going to play a prank on somebody, you do it right. You don't just do sort of a. Not even half a prank.

[Allison Rosen]

Right.

[Adam Carolla]

Number one, Number two, that is his thing, otherwise you wouldn't stage it that way. You would shove something down there, we'd ball up a bunch of socks. You do whatever. Then I'm hearing him interview and he's like, well, I don't know if that's a picture of me or not.

[Allison Rosen]

How do you not know?

[Adam Carolla]

I'd say you'd have a pretty good idea if you took that picture or not. So he took it and he did whatever. Now who did he send it to? What's the allegation?

[Allison Rosen]

College student.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. And did he have. What was the previous relationship with this 21 year old?

[Allison Rosen]

We don't know that he's married now, but he was, you know, while apparently quite the playboy prior to being married. So people are wondering, is he Back to his old ways. But I don't know what his.

[Adam Carolla]

But the real thing is, do we really give a shit? I mean, what are we that out of news? Is there nothing going on? Is Darfur completely cleared up over there? It's really. Anyone give a fuck? It's just between him and his wife. Who gives a shit?

[Allison Rosen]

Right. Well, this came to light so it appeared on Twitter very briefly and then it popped up on.

[Adam Carolla]

Briefly. You mean boxer briefly.

[Allison Rosen]

Popped up on BigGovernment.com, which is Breitbart's site.

[Giovanni]

BigGovernment.com.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, it is.

[Allison Rosen]

Not if it's cold.

[Adam Carolla]

Mm. Yeah. Still, no one should give a shit.

[Allison Rosen]

Right? Okay.

[Adam Carolla]

All right.

[Allison Rosen]

So have you heard about this Canadian couple who have a child named Storm, an infant. And they are keeping the child's gender a secret because they don't want society to impress upon the kid, you know, that, oh, you have to be like a boy or, oh, you have to be like a girl.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm sure it's gonna work out for the best. It always does.

[Allison Rosen]

Now within the. They have two other children.

[Adam Carolla]

Storm is one of the wonder twins or something, is it not? There's the like hall of League of justice or something.

[Giovanni]

Storm was an X men character. There's a high by Halle Berry.

[Adam Carolla]

Let me tell you. There's a cartoon that my kids watch where there's like Rubberman and, you know, Storm and whatever. And this chicks are fucking hot.

[Giovanni]

Storm was hot. Played by Holly Bear.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. But there's an animated version of her with red hair which is smoking hot.

[Giovanni]

Only know the white haired vers.

[Allison Rosen]

Storm might be a strapping dude. We don't know. That's. That's baby Storm there.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Allison Rosen]

And Storm has two siblings, Jazz and Keo, who are boys. Now within the family, though they are.

[Adam Carolla]

Acknowledging after a cheap car, yeah, they're.

[Allison Rosen]

Acknowledging what the sex of the baby is, but they just don't want to tell anyone.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, here would be my message from the United States to our Canadian friends over there. Who gives a fuck? Do whatever the fuck you want. Fuck up your kids. Go ahead. And all my friends on the left, all the hippies I grew up with, go fuck yourself with all this fucking gender bullshit. My son is so into son shit and my daughter so into chick shit, it's fucking unbelievable. My daughter walks around and he's like, you know, pink gowns and frou foos and things and flowers and bows. I mean, it's one fucking endless fashion show of dead.

[Giovanni]

Only because he gave them to Him.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, she explained. She told me today. She got a bikini, I got a bikini. I got a bikini. She laid it out in front of me. She wants to get her gymnast outfit. You know, my son wants to walk around in his fucking Thomas the Tank Engine underpants and be like, left alone. All he wants to do is, like, a tiny outfit, pictures of his. Every once in a while he's gonna go into politics. Yeah, he just wants to push around cars and sword fight and do all that and all for her. It's one big fat fashion show. She wants her hair done. She wants her makeup done. She wants her this done. She wants her new outfits new. She wants everything done. It's all born into him. It's encoded. It's genetic. It's how. And I love when assholes argue with me about this. Here's my argument to all you ass wives. How did we get this way, do you think? There was some fucking meeting we had 2 million years ago where a whole bunch of guys who look like the station manager, WKRP in Cincinnati all got together, a bunch of rich white fat guys smoking cigars and went, hmm, what shall we do with society? I've got it. How about we make the ladies gender role?

[Bald Bryan]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

Let's have her dress in pink. And let's have the boys play with guns and swords. All right, let it be done now. Let's all rape our secretaries and have more scotch. The reason we are this way is because that's how we are as a species.

[Allison Rosen]

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[Adam Carolla]

Same with every other species. They all have their roles. They all do their own thing. We're the only ones that are fucking up in our heads about it. Well, why is it okay for a girl? And what if a little boy wants to. And what if a girl wants to be a. Shut the fuck up.

[Allison Rosen]

See, and I just have a problem in general with people keeping something a secret and therefore becoming just, acting entitled and larger than life. When it's something that if someone just knew the answer, they just move on. But because you're keeping it a secret, then it makes them have to Be weird around you. For example, there was a band that I was friends with. There were three of them and. And two guys and a girl. They all lived together. No one knew what their relationship was. Maybe two of them were married. Were they all sleeping together? I don't know. And everyone wanted to know and they wouldn't tell anyone. But the reason everyone wanted to know is so you don't accidentally flirt with one of them or. I mean, it wasn't like everyone's obsessed with them. It's just that you sort of want to know these basic biographical details about someone, like whether they're female or male.

[Adam Carolla]

Can you tell us more about Peter, Paul and Mary? It was them best two guy in a girl band. X.

[Allison Rosen]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes. We just had a moment there.

[Allison Rosen]

You know, Billy Zoom produced my band's second album.

[Adam Carolla]

I know, okay.

[Allison Rosen]

We did have a moment. Yeah. You didn't know.

[Adam Carolla]

It just dropped down second place for me. Yeah. Billy Zoom. That's right. John Doe and Exena. Yeah. People don't know. Yeah, Exine. Boy, was she a cunt. People don't realize how good that band was and how good the harmonies were. I'm gonna hear some once over twice now.

[Giovanni]

I got a better two guy and a girl band for you. Smashing Pumpkins after they fired the drummer.

[Allison Rosen]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Gotcha. The world is a vampire. Shut up, you pretentious cock. Don't struggle with your sexuality. Question your else.

[Allison Rosen]

Yeah, what happened?

[Adam Carolla]

She came on Loveline. She was just a bitch. Bitchiest people I've ever interviewed.

[Giovanni]

I just don't. I don't like the band, actually. I just like that Billy Corgan was bald.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, it's a good statement. Favorite band? Midnight Oil. Smashing Pumpkins. Yeah. Do we have Once over Twice? You know this song?

[Giovanni]

I'm editing a drop right now.

[Adam Carolla]

All right. And find me, find me, find me. Firewoman. Fireball. Ex Storm. I mean, that fucking 70s cartoon. That chick was hot. But anyway, so as far as all you folks out there with all the gender shit, just shut the fuck up. You know, it all started back in the 60s and the 70s with all that he she stuff. Like you go, listen, all I want from a president is to make sure he's trustworthy and honest. He or she. That's the point where we all should have went, shut up. Shut up. Until we get a chick in the White House. It's he shut the fuck up. And we could have moved on. But no, we all had to go, oh, you're right. I'm so sorry. And now we got this. So I Have a son. I have a daughter. They were not pushed in any direction. They do their own thing. God knows they don't fucking listen to me or anyone else under my roof. And the girl is in love with girly shit, and the boy is in love with boy e shit. And that's how we're designed. And guess what? Not a bad thing.

[Allison Rosen]

How do you feel about. This is a tangent. How do you feel about who should pay on a date?

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, the dude should pay on a date.

[Allison Rosen]

For how long does that last?

[Adam Carolla]

I really think that one sort of breaks down to who's got what and how much money someone's making. And, you know, for me, it's like, look, if the chick is making 10 times as much as the dude and the guy, some sort of struggling poet or something, he should still pay for the first date. As a matter of fact, you shouldn't ask somebody out on a date unless you can pay for the date. But then you start weighing in. All right, I just got laid off. I just got a raise. And at that point, you start kind of working it out.

[Giovanni]

Plus, you got to pay less than $40, right?

[Adam Carolla]

That's right. Thank you. Thank you. Come on, Lynch. I want to hear some acts.

[Allison Rosen]

So Santa Monica residents may be voting on circumcision on their November 2012 ballot. The MGM bill. And MGM stands for male genital mutilation bill. Perfect, which is an organization dedicated to placing circumcision bans on ballots across the country, has proposed an initiative in Santa Monica that would ban the procedure on males under the age of 18.

[Giovanni]

What song are you looking for?

[Adam Carolla]

I think it's called Once over twice, but I'm not sure if that's the name.

[Allison Rosen]

Yeah, it is. It's the once over twice. Female circumcision, meanwhile, is outlawed in California already.

[Adam Carolla]

Why shouldn't they have the same rights that males share in this great country?

[Allison Rosen]

Here, here.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, this is great. In Santa Monica. Look, here's the deal to all you ass wipes. You're angry at your dad. Oh, sorry. Turn it up. Love the harmony.

[Allison Rosen]

My favorite song.

[Adam Carolla]

Really? I love that about you. Yeah. This is a trio, right? Too bad, too, because I like. Oh, they are Billy Zoom, John Doe.

[Allison Rosen]

John Doe, the drummer, and Xene.

[Adam Carolla]

You'll count the drummers.

[Allison Rosen]

The trio, then.

[Adam Carolla]

That's great.

[Bald Bryan]

Watching.

[Adam Carolla]

I just love John Doe and Xene's. I love their harmonies.

[Allison Rosen]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

And I was disappointed that she was such a.

[Allison Rosen]

When was that?

[Adam Carolla]

Probably 1999 or something like that. All right, let me get it. X and a Lot of people who didn't live in SoCal or Los Angeles weren't hip to X back in the day, but we were.

[Allison Rosen]

And John Doe is quite an actor as well.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, he's an actor. I think he. He does a lot of acting. I think, maybe, I don't know, directs rights or whatever, but he really. He's really one of these artists who just sort of set his sights on whatever he wanted to do. Yeah, we gotta get that guy in here. Yes, without exam.

[Allison Rosen]

Yes, yes, yes, we totally should.

[Adam Carolla]

Now, where was he?

[Allison Rosen]

I will just stare at him. We were talking about circumcision.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes. All right, so what you have is you have these groups of guys that are very angry about the mutilation of the male penis. Now, they don't really give a shit about that. They're really angry at their dad, or their dad, their stepdad, who molested them, or whatever, their parents, whatever it is. So they pick up a cause and then they bother us with it. And this is essentially what we've turned society into. And instead of people telling these ass wipes to shut the fuck up, we then give them a forum. And Santa Monica is a perfect place for that.

[Allison Rosen]

See, I don't know whether I would circumcise a son if I had one.

[Adam Carolla]

Go ahead. Sorry.

[Giovanni]

If you'll please forgive me. Could you summarize their cause one more time? My headphones were off. I was editing a drop.

[Allison Rosen]

I didn't hear. Yeah, it's that quote. Parents are really guardians, and guardians have to do what's in the best interest of the child. It's his body, it's his choice. So their argument is basically that circumcising your. It should be the kid's decision. So circumcising a child, someone under 18 is child abuse.

[Giovanni]

How about that?

[Allison Rosen]

Mutilation?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, but the point is, you can file it under who gives a fuck and we could all get on with our lives. But not in Santa Monica. We all have to fucking stop traffic and take a big fat vote on it.

[Allison Rosen]

Well, and they've also tried to propose this in this little shocky San Francisco.

[Adam Carolla]

What?

[Allison Rosen]

But now Jews are up in arms over this, saying it would be a First Amendment issue and that they should have the freedom to practice their religion and snip the foreskins, as is their way.

[Adam Carolla]

Look, either way, we have no real problems in this country or we're choosing not to address it.

[Allison Rosen]

Well, what are you. What are your thoughts, though, on circumcision? Are you pro.

[Adam Carolla]

It is up to the Individual there is definitely hygiene issue. And if you're not circumcised, you got to take care of it down there. As far as the circumcision thing goes, 200 billion cocks can't be wrong, and 200 billion uncut cocks can't be wrong. So who gives a shit? Do you know what I mean?

[Allison Rosen]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Half the world is circumcised. The other half isn't, or three quarters isn't. One quarter is. Either way, no one gives a fuck. You just got what you got. I got my kid circumcised just because I didn't want them to deal with the hygiene part and the looking different part and the possible freak out, not getting a BJ in high school. I didn't want some other dude being freaked out. I mean, some chick being freaked out by his cock. So I just went ahead and did it. Plus, you know, I like him to be a little bit lighter in case he plays a skill position, you know, football.

[Allison Rosen]

More aerodynamics.

[Adam Carolla]

Every ounce. Every ounce. Like a race guy. That's him. No, not aerodynamics. It's tucked in the cup, but it's the actual weight. The actual couple ounces. Yeah.

[Allison Rosen]

That's literally how you cut weight.

[Adam Carolla]

You literally cut weight.

[Giovanni]

I revealed this on the radio show, so it shouldn't come as any shock, but I am uncut. Teresa had the same reaction.

[Adam Carolla]

I could smell something.

[Giovanni]

That's right. You're right about the hygiene. Takes a little extra time, a little extra attention.

[Allison Rosen]

Like, what are we talking about? An extra body wash in five minutes? No, just a. Mel, what's going on?

[Giovanni]

Do you do yourself every day?

[Adam Carolla]

It is like. I mean, wouldn't you say it's like any other part of your body that you have to kind of take care of?

[Giovanni]

I think this is a hilarious example. I imagine it's like if you had long hair, like, you probably have to use a little more shampoo. Probably. It takes a little more time to dry it.

[Allison Rosen]

Yes, it's true.

[Giovanni]

Whatever it takes for hair. I'm assuming it's the same way. But what I was speaking to your point, which is not that I've had numerous encounters, but never had. I did, you know, showered in the gym after football and, you know, encountering ladies in my youth. Never had anyone give me a sideways look. As much as a sideways look, you know what I'm saying?

[Allison Rosen]

Because they didn't want to look right at you.

[Giovanni]

They're averting their eyes. The horror.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Giovanni]

No, it was never. Never, Never an issue.

[Adam Carolla]

Never.

[Giovanni]

Never even A huh?

[Adam Carolla]

I'm saying racists don't come right up to black people and make fun of them. They wait till they leave the room.

[Giovanni]

Maybe there were. Maybe there were dogs behind my back.

[Allison Rosen]

Now there will be, but I doubt it. How did you end up uncut?

[Giovanni]

Don't know. Like my parents are lazy.

[Adam Carolla]

Either way, it was like extra $4.

[Giovanni]

Maybe they were not making a lot of money back then.

[Adam Carolla]

Either way, who gives a fuck? That's my point. And what we do is here as everyone's sitting down, we don't have real problems in this society. We just don't. I mean, not the kind of problems historically that societies have had to do deal with. Historically. And people go, well, what do you mean we don't have problems? They're kids going hungry. Who's going hungry? They all seem fat to me. As a matter of fact, the poorer they are, the fatter they are. If you drive around la, you find some nice poor kids. They're nice and fat. Well, they don't have the simple necessities. Except for they all average three and a half television sets in their home. You know what I mean? They don't have access to medical care. Really? Hey, really? Is anyone fucking dying of scurvy?

[Giovanni]

You talking about uncircumcised kids now?

[Adam Carolla]

I'm just talking about what we talk about as a society. I didn't have. I didn't have health insurance for a million years. I'd fuck myself up. I'd go down to County, USC. I'd wait in line, they'd fix whatever was broken. Six months later I'd get a bill for like 600 bucks in the mail. I wouldn't pay it. And that was the end of that. You can go get shelf help. Go fucking go crash your motorcycle. Do you think the ambulance will need to see insurance before they scrape you up off the ground and throw you in the back and fucking drop you off at county usc? No, they won't. We do have access to that. We do have food. It's cheap and it's fucking abundant. Do we have schools? Yes. Do we have paved roads? Yes. Is the water clean? Yes. We like to sit around and talk about the allergies and we like to talk about the kids not having hot meals. And we talk about not having insurance and not having access. He doesn't have access. Have access to almost everything. Yes. Rich people have more access, but even the bottom line over here, and believe me, I lived in it my whole life, you have access, you're fine. Okay, so no Problems really to speak of. And now we start focusing on the skin on the end of your cock. That's what we do. Or the senator that showed, you know, took a picture of his cock, cut or uncut, and sent it to some. We don't have real problems. Yes. And other countries, see, other countries are either looking for potable water, like literally don't have clean drinkable water, or they're part or there's some genocide or ethnic cleansing campaign that's going on that they have real problems or they're evolved. They're like, you know, some parts of western Europe and Canada, I guess, where they go, fuck it, we're not going to argue over nothing. Bullshit, peanut allergies and whatever else. We're caught in some kind of weird fucking in between zone of not really having any problems but still being ass wipes and having to argue about everything and our never ending quest for just sort of fairness and equality and whatever. We're just grinding our shit to a fucking halt. I for one am not participating. I don't give a fuck about the senators cock and I don't care about all the guys in Santa Monica and their pre pews. I don't give a fuck. Now, where were we?

[Allison Rosen]

Well, speaking of no problems left. Mark Zuckerberg, Facebook CEO and Internet billionaire, is only eating meat from animals. He's killed himself. He's taken to killing goats, pigs and chickens.

[Adam Carolla]

Every.

[Allison Rosen]

Oh, and on May 4, he posted a note on his private Facebook page that said, I just killed a pig and a goat. Every year he fixates on a personal challenge. In 2009, he wore a tie every day. And this year his challenge is about animals and meat. And he was inspired by a chef named Jesse Kuhl who lives near him. And she said, she explained that he cut the throat of the goat with a knife, which is the most kind way to do it.

[Adam Carolla]

Sure, if you're a goat, you never stop. Oh no, wait a minute, you're gurgling and blood's pouring out of your neck.

[Giovanni]

Gurgling.

[Adam Carolla]

Thank you. Right.

[Allison Rosen]

And let's see, here he is explaining this. Every year in recent memory, I've taken on a personal challenge. Something to learn about the world, expand my interests and teach myself greater discipline. I spend almost all my time building Facebook. So these personal challenges are all things I wouldn't normally have the chance to learn do if I didn't take the time. Last year, for example, my personal challenge was to learn Chinese. He goes on to talk about that. This year my personal challenge is around being Thankful for the food I have to eat. He and his girlfriend are doing this.

[Adam Carolla]

Is there a mandate that says you have to eat goat? He doesn't have to eat it. He could eat some tofurky. See, this is the problem. He probably did that thing when he was, like, 19. He was like, personal challenge. Be a Kabillionaire. And then all sudden, he was 21, and he was a Kabillionaire. He's like, oh, fuck. I thought, that's gonna take, like, 30 years. Shit. Now I gotta go kill. I gotta go stab a goat.

[Giovanni]

New challenge.

[Adam Carolla]

No, man.

[Allison Rosen]

Also, pigs and chickens. Okay. Of the three, which would be the hardest to kill?

[Adam Carolla]

I would back over everything, even the pig. Mm.

[Allison Rosen]

But you care about your cars.

[Adam Carolla]

Ooh. I would rent a Ford Taurus. I would chain up the pig and back over it. Mm. I would run right over its McRibs.

[Allison Rosen]

I just. I want a yes, Andy, but I feel like it'd be hard to kill a pig by backing over it. Am I wrong?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. You'd have to really get a little running start. You really have to get going. People back over their dogs all the time. Wait till the pig falls. You wait till they fall asleep.

[Allison Rosen]

Maybe if it was one of those cute mini pigs, a little pork belly. Pot bellied. Pork bellied.

[Adam Carolla]

I'd like to use a pot bellied pig. I'd use a crossbow like my hero, Ted Nugent.

[Allison Rosen]

Oh, yeah. I do the blow dart.

[Adam Carolla]

Ooh, curare. Boom. The pig would.

[Allison Rosen]

Rabbit's neck would never see it coming.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Allison Rosen]

That's the news. I'm Alison Rosen, Pig killer.

[Adam Carolla]

That was the news with Allison Rosen. All right, I'll tell you what. Let's queue up to do a little in house. What can animal complain about? All right, now, again, this is not just your chicken or pig shit. Ones that are getting sent into us. This is ones that the staff know me well.

[Giovanni]

Here's what's happening.

[Allison Rosen]

$7 is riding on it.

[Giovanni]

A buck each. The usually reliable listeners have. It's. The game's gone from a challenge. You're the world's greatest complainer. The game's gone from a challenge to request a rant. You know what I'm saying? We collect questions from the audience at the Lovett's Club. Someone wrote a couple weeks ago on a card said, adam, bet you can't complain about Donnie and the carpet cleaner.

[Adam Carolla]

Obviously, it's essentially dance comedic monkey before Zuckerberg kills you and eats you.

[Giovanni]

That's right.

[Adam Carolla]

That's the point. Yeah. And we need real things. I Can complain about. Not just best of. Yeah, sounds that it would be difficult.

[Allison Rosen]

For you to complain about.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Well, let me talk about something I can't complain about while you're queuing that out. Amazon.com Convenient. Great deals. Support the show. How? You just use the Amazon link on our site. You go to our site, pal, there's that big Amazon thing. You punch it and then poom. You go through to Amazon and then anything you get, well, then we get like a couple of shekels from it and you can bookmark them and you [e-mail] and you support us. You want to support what we're doing. You like what we're doing, you dig what we're doing and you want to go, I'd like to give 3 cents every time I buy a sack of coffee on Amazon. Well, go ahead, [e-mail] Unbeatable convenience, amazing prices, great shipping rates. You guys all know somebody who does a ton of shopping on Amazon. Just click through our link and bookmark them and they'll give us a couple percentage points. It is absolutely the best thing in the last two years that has happened to this podcast. Absolutely. It has been absolutely overwhelming. I'm blown away and I'm so humbled before all of you. So please keep it up. We surely and truly appreciate it. Alright, shall we do a little what can't Adam complain about? Staff edition stuff. The world is full of it and one man can complain about it.

[Bald Bryan]

All.

[Adam Carolla]

This is what can Adam complain about? Got to get my ring bell out. All right, Paul, Brian.

[Giovanni]

Oh, you want me to lead off?

[Adam Carolla]

Well, your name's first on the screen. Here we go.

[Giovanni]

Maybe this is a dirty pool, but I'll bet you can't complain about me getting good MRI results and finding out my tumor's shrinking.

[Allison Rosen]

Oh, man.

[Adam Carolla]

That is rough. We did the benefit for you, so obviously we're all big fans. I broke down and cried like a baby when I had to explain that you had one. Probably jinxing my first sitcom over at cbs. Bald Bryan was cocky when he was dying. Now that he has a new breath and lease on life. And by the way, I don't know about a lease on life. I'd like to own life. You know, instead of lease, let's put.

[Giovanni]

A healthy down payment on life.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, or maybe it should be lease to own on life, but a new lease on life, what happens? 36 months, you got to turn yourself in and the guy says it's a scratch on your right side. That's going to be a deduction and the spares flat. You'll never get what you got into it. So now that Ball Bryan has a new lease on life. He's just really. You will not be able to live with him. And again, you could barely live with him in the past. I mean, but imagine it's one thing to be cocky when you sink a half court shot or cocky when your team, you know, wins the Super Bowl. But imagine you living the ultimate bragging rights. Living and breathing.

[Allison Rosen]

He was so Bob Bryan style cocky about this one. He was sure he was going to win the $7.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, this is. This is very solid. But again, I'm not saying I'd like you to be claimed by said tumor, but you don't have to live to 85. I mean, it's not overdo it.

[Giovanni]

Impressive.

[Adam Carolla]

Thank you. Dawson's next, everybody. Boss, you cannot complain about your loyal listeners in the fine city of Seattle.

[Giovanni]

Oh, this can't be harder than the brain tumor.

[Adam Carolla]

Ah, last time I was in Seattle, did a book sign someone brought their dog there. I said it. Of course one of the guy was so loyal, he made me shoes that tore my meniscus. So I got a torn meniscus and an allergy. It rained the entire time I was there. The theater was beautiful, but it took a guy a second trip to tell me Eddie Vedder was crawling along the rafters over there. And they said that the theater is so old that it had a balcony just for black patrons. And then explain that they don't use it anymore. What the fuck? Don't tee me up with that kind of racism. And then pull the carpet out from under me. Sorry, where were we? Who's next?

[Allison Rosen]

Me. Ducklings.

[Adam Carolla]

Mm, ducklings, meaning miniature ducks. They follow their mom along and they never stop following them than their mom. And then, and it is cute when they go from terra firma into the water. It's a very smooth transition where they all just go and they fall. But you know what? I've done the mom math. I didn't have a great mom. You know what I mean? And I'll bet you I could find a few other friends that didn't have a great mom. And what if we were ducklings? We'd have to eagerly follow our mom and show our moms the same respect that the ducklings give mom a duck before Zuckerberg slits the duck's throat and has it for dinner tonight. All I'm saying is it's nice to follow your mom, but not all moms. It sends a very dangerous message and It's a very slippery slope that a lot of children may be watching. The young ducklings follow their mom, and then they follow their mom home. And what's their mom do? Well, their mom lights up a cigarette and has a hit of whiskey and then has sex with a john, turns a trick and then perhaps doesn't recycle, and then slams some heroin and then drives without buckling them into a child seat even though they're under £60. So all of a sudden, following your mom, not such a good thing. Deadly.

[James Tupper]

Deft.

[Allison Rosen]

I never thought ducklings is so irresponsible.

[Giovanni]

Look at duckness differently, don't you?

[Adam Carolla]

Yes.

[Allison Rosen]

Yeah.

[Giovanni]

Chris, do you know who that is?

[Adam Carolla]

No. That's a dude I went to high school with. Close enough.

[James Tupper]

All right, all right, Adam, so we know how you. How you feel about those left turn red arrows. So I'm trying to employ the opposite. And I'm gonna say, while you're driving, you get those glorious green turn red. Green green light red. You know what I mean? Green right turn arrows.

[Adam Carolla]

We're not paying you, are we, son?

[James Tupper]

You are.

[Adam Carolla]

What the. What is going on? All right. Thank God, it's Pittance. How can I complain about a green turn arrow?

[James Tupper]

Right turn arrow.

[Adam Carolla]

Hold on a second. How can I complain about the right turn arrow? The green right turn arrow? Pedestrians, do not try to season my stew. I'm my own Mrs. Dash. Thank you. I'll tell you why. The arrow seemed like a good idea. Just like taxes seemed like a good idea back when. Hey, we'll take just a little something off the top to keep the roads nice and keep a nice standing army and keep things, the schools, up and running. Everything seems like a good idea at first, and then it snowballs into a horrible idea. And this is what happened with the arrows. It seemed like a good idea. But the point is, now whenever I see an arrow, I'm in a bad mood. Even good arrows. Even bad arrows. Even friendly arrows, it puts me in a bad mood. We were talking about racists before. This is how people become racist. They see one black guy commit a crime, next thing you knew. No, they're hanging out with Denzel Washington and taking a swing at him. Why? He's one of them. And even the green arrows are one of them. And by the way, as I've said, I'm colorblind, so I don't know the difference between the green arrows and the red arrows. They're all bad arrows. To me and my sick arrow clan. Thank you. Is that it?

[Bald Bryan]

Who else do we have.

[Allison Rosen]

Oh, no, Logan.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, Adam, how can you complain about your supply of free red wine in the back? Mmm. I will say this. I do love our Sledgehammer. I do love our free red wine, and I do love our free Sledgehammer. I decided two years ago to just drink Pinot Noir. I don't know why. Somebody turned me on to it, and I dug it. Sledgehammer makes a fine wine, but they make everything but a Pinot Noir. So it's as if they tailor made their winery to the exact opposite of my palate. And do not get me wrong, a buzz is a buzz. And they make a fine Cabernet. And I will go home and happily consume that. But it is not the Pinot Noir that I. That I lust after. And secondly, they made a huge mistake over there at Sledgehammer. They make their bottles way too heavy. Now, maybe they're just overdoing it, and I like that. They're a heavy duty company. But when you pick it up, it makes it feel like it's half full. And then you turn it over and a couple of drops of just wine spittle come out of it. You have an arm and a booze weight thing. It's built into all great Americans where you pick up that wine bottle and you go, I got about a glass and a half left in here. I don't care if light passes through it. You don't have to hold it up. It's dark, you're looking the other way. You go, I got that. You turn over and just bloop one little drop. Again, feeling like an alcoholic. And God forbid you have a hold of one of those Sledgehammer bottles. And some bikers break into your kitchen at night, and you have to do that. You want to go. And you slam it on the counter. It ain't breaking, baby. Dunk, Dunk. And then you go. Who wants to roll? And then you go, dunk. And then you go. Listen, your ass. Your. Your mouth is writing checks your ass can't cash. And then you dunk again. And eventually, after you've caved in the side of your counter, you just turn tail and run. And later on, you get raped with the bottle. Who's up next?

[Giovanni]

This is Matt.

[Adam Carolla]

We're just gonna say that should you not be able to complain about this part of that $7. Hold on a second. Right in your pocket. Matt. Matt sort of sounds like the nerd from the Simpsons.

[Giovanni]

Nelson.

[Adam Carolla]

Not Nelson. What? Nelson Muntz is the.

[Giovanni]

No, no, I.

[Adam Carolla]

No. And he's not talking About Ralph. William. No, not William. No, no, not Mill House.

[James Tupper]

Just.

[Adam Carolla]

There's a sign. No, there's just a nerd. That whenever they do one of those Martin.

[Allison Rosen]

But you sound awfully nerdy.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, it's Martin too. But even a generic nerd, whenever they do like Ultra Boy and Maxim, man, and they. And they start asking him questions about. But go ahead, go ahead, man. I don't think you can complain. I can't even get through this.

[Giovanni]

The accomplishments of American soldiers during World War II.

[Adam Carolla]

Wow. All right. I will say this a my thank you. There is the nerd I'm talking about. My dad tried to go into the service, but he was club footed. So they did not let them in. Although I think it was just an excuse. Like they sized up my dad and went, we don't want guys tripping in front of guys. They're trying to shoot kraut. So let's go ahead and. Go ahead and make you 10, 4.4K or whatever the hell they put you when they get you out of there. I will tell you this. 4F. I went and pulled up my Uncle Ralph's dog tags and his Purple Heart and some of his medals and some of his accommodations, which I own. He passed away, he was a gunner and he worked the.50 caliber machine gun and he worked it in the island, hopped over there in the Pacific, and he basically just mowed over just tons of Japanese guys that were just charging him in his under in their underpants with banzai runs in the middle of the night. Ask him what he would have thought about invading Japan and how many millions of Japanese civilians we would have had to kill over there had we not mercifully dropped the bomb on their asses and ended the fucking war they started. But how can I complain about those guys? When I was checking Uncle Ralph's dog tags, it said Ralph Caroll O, not Ralph Caroll A. It said Ralph Caroll O. My dad's name is James Caroll. Uh, and as far as I know, his dad's name is Giacomo Caroll. Uh, but for some reason my cousin or my Uncle Ralph spelled it Coroll O. And when I said to my dad, and again, it's the worst thing a family member can ever give another family member. Pure abject apathy. I said to my dad, dad, how come your brother, your older brother, the war hero, went by a different last name, marginally, but yet a different last name than you went by your entire life? He paused, he looked down, he looked up at me and he said, I don't know. And I thought, that's what's fucking wrong with this country. And the Corollas or the Corollas. I don't even know who we are anymore. We gotta get Chef Boy D involved to actually finish this one. All right, do we have another one?

[Bald Bryan]

Last 1 and 7 bucks is mine.

[Adam Carolla]

Because you cannot possibly complain about Albert Brooks. Albert Brooks. Brooks, when I interviewed Albert Brooks, was funnier than me. And there are a lot of people that are richer than me, and there are a lot of people that have made a lot more movies and had a ton more success, but no one's funnier than me. Not when we sit down. Not one on one. Oh, they're funnier at what they do. Maybe they make movies or they write books or they do stand up. They're funnier than me. Sarah Silverman is funnier when she does stand up, but when she sits down, she's not funnier than me. Albert Brooks was funnier than me. And I don't like that because I always get that satisfaction of going, so what? He's rich. So what? He's going into the hall of fame. So what? He's everyone's comedic hero. I'm still funnier than that guy. But Albert Brooks is sat next to me. And part of it was I was sitting next to Albert Brooks. So maybe I was a little bit off my game or a little bit up in my head or a little bit nervous. The other thing that was weird is we're sitting on a sofa facing out instead of facing each other like I prefer, but again. And there was a little wind in there, and the sun was in my eye. But I don't make excuses, but those are all complaints. Albert Brooks was funnier than I was, and I did not fucking appreciate him and his hearty har ass. And when he came up with his line, and I'm sure he said it before, but it still worked very seamlessly. When he came up with his comploplaints or whatever his thing was, Mike said, complisalts, complesaults, the compliments that turn into an insult. I said quietly and under my breath, touche, my funny brethren. Now be gone. That was what can't Adam complain about. Wow. Mike just presented me with the money.

[Giovanni]

Now, if I can. If I can suggest a different ending to this game. Who challenged you the most? Granted, you complained successfully. I read that about all of those who earned the most.

[Allison Rosen]

You're only asking because you think it's you.

[Giovanni]

Actually, I think I may have come in last.

[Adam Carolla]

Albert Brooks and then whatever the half Asian kid wanted.

[Bald Bryan]

We have two.

[Allison Rosen]

Oh, arrows or wine.

[Adam Carolla]

I can't. That's not the same dude. No, I. I would say the servicemen from World War II. That was a tough one because I ended up getting into Ralph. I. I seamlessly went into my Uncle Ralph, but it really wasn't.

[Allison Rosen]

Oh, is that the nerd?

[Giovanni]

The Simpsons picture of the nerd. Shockingly close to Matt. We gotta put this up.

[Allison Rosen]

I know.

[Adam Carolla]

My glasses are not red. Okay. It's like Matt and it's now Mike Lynch. You got to come up with something for him to say, because they were like. There was. There was the one where Homer. All right, Matt. Assistant Matt.

[Allison Rosen]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

Say. Say if whoever stole my inhaler, I demand you return it post haste. Whoever stole my inhaler, I demand you return it post haste. Pretty good. Thank you. Pretty good. All right, let's. Let's take ourselves a break. Who's here tonight? Who's our guest?

[Allison Rosen]

James Tupper.

[Adam Carolla]

Ah, James Tupper is here. We'll talk to him right after this. Yeah. Whoo. Tired from complaining. James Duper in studio. The movie is Mr. Popper's Penguins, in theaters June 17th. Also stars Jim Carrey. Also probably know him as Dr. Andrew Perkins from Grey's Anatomy. And also men in trees and movies. Working on with. Listen to this list. Uma Thurman, Catherine Zeta Jones, and Jessica Beale. I would say, like, three of the most beautiful women from each category in their own weird way. Like, they're very, you know, Uma Thurman and Catherine Zeta Jones. Nothing alike, but yet fantastic looking. And then there's Jessica Biel. Yeah, nice, right?

[Bald Bryan]

She's really beautiful. She's as beautiful as she is photographed. No, and I had a relationship with her in it, so we had.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, man.

[James Tupper]

Yeah.

[Bald Bryan]

That's kind of exciting.

[Adam Carolla]

That is sweet. So the movie, the Mr. Popper's Penguins. I've been seeing the ads or just the billboards, actually, and I can't figure out what it's about or if it's what it is. All I know is that Jim Carrey must be sleeping in a hyperbolic chamber because it looks exactly the same as he did 10 years ago. What's going on?

[Bald Bryan]

No, it's a. It's a family movie based on a novel from probably 1920. Mr. Popper's Penguins, about a family.

[Adam Carolla]

Is that popular? And I don't know about it because I don't read.

[Bald Bryan]

It's weird. Like, the only people that I've met that know about it kind of work in A library.

[Adam Carolla]

So either bums or old ladies. And I guess the bums don't really work there. They just read the free newspaper. So somebody's finally made this into a movie. And then your part is what?

[Bald Bryan]

Well, in the original, it's just a family that adopts penguins from the north, and it becomes a big adventure for them. But. And they're really poor and they make money off them. But in the remake, it's a divorced family, and Jim Carrey's like, this super rich guy who owns a tavern on the Green, and I was trying to buy it in the Flatiron building in New York, and he's also trying to win back his wife, and I'm dating his wife.

[Adam Carolla]

And who's his wife? She hot?

[Bald Bryan]

Carla.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, she's hot, right? Yes. You get to date lots of hot chicks. And are you the villain.

[Bald Bryan]

What?

[Allison Rosen]

Are you the villain of Mr. Popper's penguins?

[Bald Bryan]

No, I'm not a villain. I play kind of really sweet guy with a big beard from Oregon who's like a counterpoint to.

[Adam Carolla]

I rented Mr. Popper's Hyman's Last week.

[Allison Rosen]

I feel like I already know how it ends.

[Adam Carolla]

It's a mess. Also, James explained to me that he came to my house when I was renovating it many years ago with a. A mutual friend of ours, John Bynes. I was just lamenting to Jimmy Kimmel two nights ago that I had to buy fucking John Bynes one $35 ticket on.

[Bald Bryan]

He mentioned that in the phone call last night.

[Adam Carolla]

He did, he did, yeah. It was like one of these things where you don't want to be a dick, but I've told the story before, but I was in New York and I was getting hooked up with. You know, Bynes and I are friends. I was like, I'm in town. We should hook up. Let's go out. Let's get something to eat, whatever. And then Dag calls me and he says he's getting a Tony or is nominated for Tony for race. And he's like, yeah, come by and check out the play. And I'm like, oh, okay. And then at the last second, Bynes is like, ah, should I go? Should I? And he goes, ah, man. And then I go to the box office, and I'm like, we should have a couple tickets under Corolla. And she's like, yeah, we got one ticket. And I was like, oh, we should have a couple tickets, right? No, no, just one. That's what we give. Everybody gets one ticket. I'm like, oh, okay. So One ticket and then how much is the other ticket? And I'm used to like an expensive movie theaters, like $14, you know, $133. And I'm like, see a fucking play. Like there's not even any wires or anything. There's no Spider man. There's nothing. There's people sitting around talking about race.

[Bald Bryan]

Was there nudity?

[Adam Carolla]

No nudity. No fake helicopters, no acrobatics, no chandeliers. Chandeliers. No orchestra. No nothing. I was like, are you fucking. I'm just doing this to be nice to Dag. Now I'm standing looking at binds and I'm thinking, I gotta buy you a fuckin $135 ticket.

[Allison Rosen]

You didn't even get a blowjob out of it. Or did you?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah. And then we went to a weird little speakeasy off of Broadway with like a secret knock because you can't just go into, you know, the Carnegie Deli. Everyone's gonna bother everyone. And everyone on Broadway wants to go out and have a pop after their show, but they don't want to go sit amongst the fans. So there's a secret little place place they go. And you go upstairs and you see all the, you see all the Broadway celebrities hanging around. And then we ordered a bunch of drinks and a bunch of whatever. And then I paid for that shit too. No $500 night. Well, who's gonna pay at this point, right?

[Allison Rosen]

Not Dag, the star. Not your date.

[Adam Carolla]

Not my date. I'm trying to get a blow job. So anyway, James was reminding me that when him and. Him and Bynes came by somebody. I'm standing out front working on a gate with one of my guys and some guy in an SUV drove by and called the guy fat. And he was fat. And then I just drive by, drive by, judging. And then I had to just stand there next to the fat guy. Not, you know, didn't want to. What'd he do?

[Allison Rosen]

Did he suck in his gut or anything afterwards?

[Adam Carolla]

It's like he did yell. He didn't yell. Morbidly obese. Although he was going 40 miles an hour, so it's hard to tell if he had that guy.

[Allison Rosen]

Were you like, he's just jealous?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, he wishes he had a huge gun. So anyway, James, let's focus on you. By the way, James was a carpenter, or so it says here. Yes. Is that true?

[Bald Bryan]

Yeah. Yeah, that's what I did when I do theater at night and I'd work on houses during the day. I did it for years.

[Adam Carolla]

He did for years in Nova Scotia.

[Bald Bryan]

Did in Nova Scotia, New York, and then Los Angeles.

[Adam Carolla]

So. Really? Really? Carpenter? Carpenter, yeah. Hanging doors, that kind of stuff.

[Bald Bryan]

I don't know. Is that exciting to anyone?

[James Tupper]

I.

[Allison Rosen]

It's exciting to Adam.

[Bald Bryan]

No, no, no.

[Adam Carolla]

I mean, yeah, I like it.

[Giovanni]

Well, you asked if it was exciting to anyone.

[Bald Bryan]

No, I.

[Allison Rosen]

We're just being honest.

[Bald Bryan]

No, I love building. It's one of my favorite things to do and it's how I, you know, catch a break in the day. I'll just invent a project or something.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, I hate to tell you, but that's not very exciting.

[Allison Rosen]

What's your favorite tool?

[Bald Bryan]

Yeah, what? I guess it depends on the job. You know, everybody, every carpenter probably likes his hammer.

[Allison Rosen]

Is that true, Adam?

[Adam Carolla]

Well, I like the fact that there's like eight different kinds of hammers, you know, and I love the handle. I love the hatchet handle on a framing hammer. I like the way that feels and I like that there's a huge difference between a finish hammer and a framing hammer. Yeah.

[Allison Rosen]

Any love for the ball peen?

[Adam Carolla]

That's your dad or your grandpa's hammer. That's more for just banging out fenders, you know, not really for carpenters.

[Allison Rosen]

Okay.

[Adam Carolla]

Every once in a while, I might knock in a brad nail with a little tack hammer. Ah, waffle headed framing hammer.

[Allison Rosen]

What's a waffle headed hammer? Does it have, like.

[Giovanni]

I don't know. I've heard him say it before.

[Allison Rosen]

Does it look like a waffle iron?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. The end is carved up like a waffle. And the head of a common head, like 60, 16 penny sinker nail, has a kind of waffle stamp in it when you strike it. Thus you get a little more grip.

[Giovanni]

On it versus the finish.

[Allison Rosen]

Kind of exciting to me.

[Adam Carolla]

James knows.

[Bald Bryan]

There it is.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Allison Rosen]

Meat tenderizer.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Although it's got a weird ring around it, which is a newer thing. I happen to like the oscillating spindle sander.

[Allison Rosen]

Oh, yeah.

[Bald Bryan]

That's a hot.

[Allison Rosen]

Oh, yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

This is damn exciting. It's good stuff. So what was it like working with Jim Carrey? Nuts. Nice.

[Bald Bryan]

No, you know, it's like, it's very focused.

[Adam Carolla]

It's.

[Bald Bryan]

Everything's very focused. Quiet. And the weird thing about it, I've done a lot of television. They give you like two or three takes and you're done. And I think I came to the door and I come in, I say, hello. And he did it like, I think we did it 30 times or something.

[Adam Carolla]

Because he wanted to do it 30.

[Bald Bryan]

Yeah. Well, he likes to improvise and fool around and play, and then they turn around. I mean, I did it 30 times. And, you know, and then they're like, do you want to. He's doing. You got to do some more. You want to do some more? And I'm like, nah, I'm good. You know, take 16 and take 21.

[Adam Carolla]

We're great. It's just a gig. Yeah.

[Bald Bryan]

Let's see.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. You got nails to pound.

[Bald Bryan]

Right.

[Adam Carolla]

And hearts to break. Yeah. Yeah. So he's focused.

[Bald Bryan]

Yeah, he's. He's. He's focused. He was reading a book on psychology, something about child psychology. And he's very. You know, he's got so much on the shoulder. He's got so much on his shoulders, and you get the feeling you're there, that he's like a career maker. You look at Bradley Cooper, had that great part in that movie they did together. It's like people that get into his movies kind of get elevated, and I think he.

[Adam Carolla]

I remember Bradley Cooper from Wedding Crashers, Right?

[Bald Bryan]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Then. Well, yeah, but when was he made? In the gym.

[Bald Bryan]

It was in the one where he couldn't tell a lie.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, Liar, Liar. I didn't. Was that. Is that Liar, Liar?

[Giovanni]

No, no, I have no recollection of that. Was he really in that?

[Adam Carolla]

Well, there he is.

[Bald Bryan]

No, no, no, he wasn't in Liar, Liar. He was. It wasn't.

[Giovanni]

That was the lawyer one, the more recent one.

[Bald Bryan]

Yeah. With.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, the fun. With Dickens.

[Allison Rosen]

Yes, man.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes, man. Okay. Yes, ma' am.

[Giovanni]

Yes, ma' am.

[Bald Bryan]

Yes, ma' am.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, I see. That's Bradley Cooper. There you go. Young Bradley Cooper. Yes. Pre hangover. So.

[Bald Bryan]

But the first day on set, I walked on, he slapped me on the back, and he's like, jim or James.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, really?

[Bald Bryan]

And I was like, I'll go with James. I think you got the gym covered.

[Adam Carolla]

Right, right. He seems to be one of these guys that's up in his head a lot. Cerebral. Yeah.

[Bald Bryan]

I think comedy's like that a little bit. Isn't it, though? You have to kind of figure it out. And he's very technical in what he does.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. I would say, I think that guys like that feel alone in a way. Like they're in a satellite sort of hovering through society, and they're trying to navigate, negotiate, and they understand that there's certain things they can and can't do. You can't. You know, if a cop pulls you over, you have to pull over. And when you meet somebody, you should shake their hand and try to be Polite. But you always get the idea that their head's a little somewhere else and they're sort of floating around. We were just talking the other day about Steve Martin and it's that same sort of like. I mean, maybe it's a genius thing or something about when you're really good at what you do. But I've never met Jim Carrey. I just get the feeling like he's floating above the conversation a little and saying all the things he should say, but not completely there thinking about something else.

[Bald Bryan]

That sounds very true, actually. But the amount of responsibility that he has. Like this. You walk on a set and there's like this hundred million dollar set with crazy penguins. Live penguins are on set with us. They kept it like below zero or whatever. Celsius sure kept it freezing.

[Allison Rosen]

What divas those birds are.

[Adam Carolla]

But just like when do Letterman. But it's so. It's like. So there's this thing where if he. If he absorbed everything that was in his life, his head would probably explode. So if he pulled up to set every day knowing that every human being was there essentially because of him, everyone from the security to craft service to the penguin wranglers, or then drove home at the end of the day or now and saw a billboard every 12ft with a 14 foot picture of his mug on it, at some point, I don't think your brain is wired to process that. Or if you do process it, you end up like IDI Amin or Saddam Hussein. You end up standing on a balcony with a shotgun firing it over your head. So I think there's a part that has to check out and almost numb yourself to it because it's overwhelming.

[Bald Bryan]

Yeah, I mean, I was curious about. He did. He does keep to himself. He goes to his dressing room between takes in there and he has his own hair and makeup people. And you know, like he does. He's very quiet, very introspect, I don't know.

[Adam Carolla]

But polite.

[Bald Bryan]

Very polite.

[Adam Carolla]

But doing like it's a kind of thing where no court could ever convict him of being an asshole or being a prima donna or anything like that.

[Bald Bryan]

No, the opposite. Like on my take, he runs over and change. That was great. I tried again with the. You know, because he's trying to make his movie great too. You know, he wants me to be relaxed and right. He's, you know.

[Adam Carolla]

Now when you say his movie, he's doing more than starring in it.

[Bald Bryan]

Oh, producing. I don't know.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, I'm sure it probably gets a. Gets a taste, right?

[Bald Bryan]

Yeah. I mean, the Whole thing gets boring because he says yes.

[Adam Carolla]

He puts his name on it. Yeah, like, you sure? But Adam Carollis has jumped. They say how high?

[James Tupper]

Hammer.

[Adam Carolla]

Hammer. Yeah.

[Giovanni]

Just thinking about for the last three minutes is Jim Carrey's part of a very small group. We forget his accomplishments. He's been to the top of the mountain in three very different kinds of comedies. Conquered the world of comic movies, sketch comedy, Living Color. He was far and away the biggest star in the show.

[Adam Carolla]

Tell us a dag.

[Giovanni]

Sorry, Size dag. And then stand up too. He was a huge stand up before this all started.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, was he a huge stand up?

[Giovanni]

I think, like I was thinking about also like Eddie Murphy and Mike Myers, guys like that, who once the stand up thing sort of starts taking off, they leave that behind and move on to sketch comedy, move on to big movies. But that's a pretty small fraternity that he's a part of, you know, that has really conquered those three mediums.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Pretty impressive, no? It is. And I've always got the feeling, especially because the guy sort of came from where he came from, which was not too much, that this whole thing is just probably insane for him and that he has to constantly keep some sort of level going in his mind that otherwise he would just. His brain would attack itself.

[Bald Bryan]

It's totally true. The other thing too is that he's taking on a character. So he's got this responsibility. The show is not going to work on penguins and it's not going to work on his co stars. It's going to work because he's this, has. It has this soul or whatever. He's figured out how to portray it. So he's got that going on too. Like he's, he's living with that. Whatever the character is.

[Adam Carolla]

Do you think he has buddies, like just dudes who, you know, hang out with him and are civilians and, you know, so on and so forth? Yes.

[Giovanni]

I don't know about outside of acting. One of his oldest buddies is Nick Cage. Him and Nick Cage, like friends. Are they really back from like Pegasus? Got married. They were on the good grounding.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Yeah, that's right. He's not in the industry. Yeah. So now, James, you have two kids. You and Anne Heche had two kids?

[James Tupper]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

How's she doing?

[Bald Bryan]

She's doing great. She just, she did a movie, Cedar Rapids, that came out and she's on a TV series hung on hbo.

[Adam Carolla]

What was going on with her? Were you with her when she had her sort of manic phase or whatever you want to call it?

[Bald Bryan]

No, I mean, I met her long after that and she.

[James Tupper]

She know.

[Bald Bryan]

She wrote a book about it. She did call me crazy.

[Adam Carolla]

Huh. And did she get it? Sort of straightened it out. What was going on? I mean, was there like an imbalance or what's her version of it?

[Bald Bryan]

I think, like a lot of really talented people. There's. She had a very troubled, very difficult. She grew up in a Christian cult. You know, her dad was a secret gay man who had died, one of the first victims of aids, and her brother committed suicide. Like, there's a long list of awful things that happened to her and I think.

[Adam Carolla]

So this is in the penguin movie. No, this doesn't sound family oriented or funny. I mean, funny to me, but I don't. I have a dark sense of humor.

[Giovanni]

Cliched.

[Adam Carolla]

Buddy. Yeah. So more about. No, so her. So Christian cult. Gay. I mean, just. It couldn't get any worse than that, basically.

[Bald Bryan]

And I think she created like, you know, she, like a creative person, created characters to get out of it and then. And then had, you know, decide basically to live her life is like, I'm going to be here in this world and I'm going to participate in. And loving it. And I've been with her six years and we have two beautiful kids. And she's obviously. I'm a huge fan. She's a fantastic mom.

[Adam Carolla]

So she got a lot of therapy?

[Bald Bryan]

I guess so. Yeah. Not when I was with her, but before. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, that's good. You know, listen, it's actually better to be with someone who's been through it and then has righted the ship rather than the person that just sort of never changes, never takes a look in the mirror, never seeks any therapy, never looks to improve themselves, constantly sort of externalizing, never internalizing. It's nice to be with that person. She.

[Bald Bryan]

That. Yeah, that's her.

[Adam Carolla]

So that's. So it's like a different Anne Heche then. I guess society might know.

[Bald Bryan]

Yeah, all that. Those troubles happened a decade ago. You know, there are more, you know, so. Yeah, I feel like she's having a bit of a renaissance. She's having a comeback that people are starting to hire her again and she's doing well in her shows and stuff.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, she's talented and Hollywood generally forgives and forgets. Like, we move on.

[Bald Bryan]

Yeah, it takes a decade, takes a.

[Adam Carolla]

Little while, but we move on.

[Bald Bryan]

You think Charlie Sheen's coming back?

[Adam Carolla]

You know, the thing, I mean, you look at something, I mean, you really. You take a look at somebody. I was just, you know, you think about somebody like Kim Kardashian making $60 million last year with not a lick of talent and essentially started because she had a bootleg porn movie put out on the Internet. And now she's. She's the toast of Madison Avenue. And the notion of this has not been a decade. This has been, you know, four years or whatever it's been. But the point is, if Madison Avenue will get behind you, if you're gonna get Revlon and Pepsi and whatever, and I'm not talking about The Fleshlight or AdamAndEve.com I'm talking about just big old Madison Avenue sort of behind the chick that's got the bootleg porn film. Well, then there's hope for all of us. That's all I'm saying. So you and Ann, you're together. You live together, you have a couple kids, you live here in town?

[Bald Bryan]

Cat and a dog. We do la.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. How old are the kids?

[Bald Bryan]

Two and nine.

[Adam Carolla]

That's good. A little play date. My kids turning five in.

[James Tupper]

Oh, really?

[Adam Carolla]

A week or so. Yeah.

[Bald Bryan]

Did you finish the pool with the window?

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. You should come over. I'm coming over because you not seen the house since you and John came by for a tour.

[Bald Bryan]

I'd love to.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, listen, listen. When I tell people I'm a nut with the carpentry, I mean, I'm a nut, right? I'm nuts. No, you were.

[Bald Bryan]

When I was there, I was really impressed you were doing it.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm nuts. That's my thing. I'm nuts with that shit. And I'm much better at it than this. It's just. This pays better than that. It's pretty easy. It's pretty easy. Equation carbon is a tough way to make a living.

[Bald Bryan]

It is.

[Adam Carolla]

You can do. Okay.

[Bald Bryan]

Your shoulder. My shoulders would just kill at the.

[Adam Carolla]

End of the day, back hurts. Up on the roof, drinking from a hose, shitting into a plastic outhouse.

[Allison Rosen]

And plus, where do you throw the cans when you're on the roof, when you're drinking the beer?

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, yeah. Pretty thrummed. Yeah. Just try to find anyone who's walking underneath you. I had a nice story I haven't told in a little while, but when I used to do earthquake rehab work, which is the thing about carpentry is there's jobs that are cool and then jobs are ultra depressing, and it's still all carpentry. I've had jobs where I worked on cliffs above Malibu. Like just right out there off of Rambla Pacifico, you know, just up There, wind blowing offshore, seeing cars going down PCH and up there just staring at the other mansions and just up there for three months, just building a. Building a red oak stair railing just with just from hand, just all for three months of my life just up there. House burned to the ground actually. Did it really? It did. And here's how you know, I'm soulless. I drove past the place and there was just the foundation and I spent about six months there building the place and I was driving with someone and they said what's it feel like? You build that place with your hands and there's nothing left? I said doesn't feel like anything. Just moved on to the next job. But there's those jobs and then there's going to Normandy and Wilshire and working in government subsidized shitty earthquake rehab. Not one bedroom but single unit old brick buildings from the 30s. Digging footings with a coffee can underneath the place, going into everyone's units, stripping their units, shear walling it, putting in all thread and, and hold downs and continuous strap and ripping out their kitchens. Having cockroaches everywhere and having all the nut jobs that lived in those super smelly apartments. There's that version of construction too.

[Allison Rosen]

I'm apartment hunting right now and I feel like that's what I've been looking at.

[Adam Carolla]

Don't go into that place. I know one guy shit in a bucket and he shit in a five gallon bucket.

[Giovanni]

Is it an Corolla?

[Adam Carolla]

That was a decorative popcorn tin which is completely, completely different. Brian, thank you. Night and day. The point is this, this guy shat upon a bucket and unto the bucket, he shot unto the bucket and it was bad. And I worked in the back of this shitty, pardon the pun, apartment building and it was a five or six story brick. There's just brick blocks, they're just blocks and they all need to be earthquake rehabbed because they're all going to fall apart. An earthquake. And all those plates that get put on, on the outside of the building, all those tension anchors or sheer anchors, we had to put them all on. And the back, there's no backyard to those things. There's a little strip of cement with a clothes hanger, that clothesline that hangs there and that's where I set up, I set up my table saw back there and I'd be back there milling my baseboard and doing my finished up because after we tore apart every unit I'd have to come in and put it back together, put the tile back in the bathroom. I'd sit in their fucking bathtub for eight hours at a time and just put tile back on after we shear walled the wall and do the baseboard and blah blah, blah. So I'm back there with my table saw milling and of course I got the table saw on, I can't hear a fucking thing. The guys I work with took the shit bucket and they put about five feet away from me and then they sort of buried it. They leaned plywood up against it and put some other stuff against it. They camouflaged it so I could not see it back there. And then it's just a sheer brick wall going up five stories. Like I'm standing right next to them. And they all went to the top of the roof and there's a parapet, about a three foot wall up there. And they all leaned over the top of the parapet and they took the bolts that we would use to hold on the tension anchors or the sheer. There were shear anchors anyway, they take the bolts and they would drop the bolt off it. And each time one landed in the bucket, it smelled like somebody took a shit or farted right next to me. And then to their great delight, you know, every five minutes I would stop what I was doing with my table saw and like lean back and go, what the fuck? What was that? You know? And I couldn't hear anything because I had the fucking table. I was like, who's shitting up this place? Oh yes, they're up on the roof for an hour dropping bolts into the shit bucket while I was down below.

[Allison Rosen]

They couldn't just fart near you.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, they would do that. Oh we, we, we, we took a picture in front of the building with a hundred year old woman who'd been living there for 70 years named Millie. And I thought it'd be a great idea to get a group photo, get all the carpenters together, get all the old timers who lived in the building, have them huddle around Millie who'd been living there for 70 years and was celebrating her 100th birthday. And we'd all get a big shot in front of this building. And the dude Fraser from New Zealand was standing with his arm around Millie and I was standing on the other side of Millie. And Frazier let one of his huge farts go right before they took the picture. And everyone just went fucking Frazier and everyone, fuck this. And everyone just dispersed. And we never took the picture with poor now dead Billy. Yep, everyone's like, fuck this guy.

[Giovanni]

Probably dead.

[Adam Carolla]

Probably dead Billy. Yes.

[Allison Rosen]

If the fart didn't kill Herald.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah, and this guy Frazier would fart on everyone so much, and everyone knew it. And everyone had literally such an asshole of it that when he did, it was like. It was. It's like, all right, on the count of three, cut cheese, you know? And it was one, two. Fucking Frazier. Fuck. Damn it. Fuck this. And everyone just. Everyone just spread out. Never came back and took a picture. Poor Millie, she just standing there. 100 year old, having lived in that.

[Allison Rosen]

Shithole for 70 years.

[Bald Bryan]

70.

[Adam Carolla]

These were no bedrooms. These were Murphy beds.

[Allison Rosen]

Oh, the efficiency. The single unit efficiency.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, yeah, yeah. Sad.

[Allison Rosen]

What was Working with penguins like.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Allison Rosen]

On behalf of all children, I'd like.

[Adam Carolla]

How old do they get? Any 100 year old penguins?

[Bald Bryan]

I don't know. I don't know how old they get. No, they're kind of cool because they're like. They're about knee high. They're really small. They're smaller than you think. And they get. They look like they're wearing a tuxedo, but their chests are really puffed out.

[Adam Carolla]

Do they know you?

[Bald Bryan]

So they look like a toddler who's like, ready for you.

[Adam Carolla]

Want some of this?

[Allison Rosen]

Did you get recognized by penguins? Is that what you're asking, Adam?

[Adam Carolla]

No. I mean, after, you know, your 10th day on the set, do they go, ah, this one?

[Bald Bryan]

No, they're ornery. They don't like people.

[Adam Carolla]

Really?

[Bald Bryan]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

And did you ever try, I guess the wranglers, like, don't give them any cheese. You'll with them. Like, they don't want.

[Bald Bryan]

They can't. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

And they just. They're not fans of people, huh? No, no, they're like all birds. They're assholes. Right. Fucking try to run everyone off at their beak.

[Bald Bryan]

I don't mind a bird, but often we'd be doing it to cg. We'd just be looking at a dot, like, hey, how are you? Like, you had to shake the penguin's hand and stuff.

[Adam Carolla]

Right, Right. Because the real penguins are asshole.

[Bald Bryan]

They can't act.

[Adam Carolla]

It's so. They're just horrible. What level of acting? Soap. Like Mexican soap style or like rock.

[Allison Rosen]

Star with a walk on?

[Bald Bryan]

Mm, no, I think I put them with extras. They just don't know what they're doing.

[Allison Rosen]

Oh, the atmosphere, background birds.

[Adam Carolla]

Did we lose any during the filming?

[Bald Bryan]

No, no.

[Allison Rosen]

You have to say that.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. How many penguins did we actually have?

[Bald Bryan]

I think there was nine or ten.

[Adam Carolla]

And did we have. All right, so we have.

[Bald Bryan]

Look at that picture.

[Adam Carolla]

We have. We have real penguins. Right? And then we have the CG penguins. CGI Type. Right. And then there's got to be one animatronic penguin. Right. It's gotta be one, like, penguin head that can move its eyebrows or something, right?

[Bald Bryan]

No, I don't think they had that. They had a plastic penguin that just.

[Adam Carolla]

Sat there that you. That you used to act with. Yeah.

[Bald Bryan]

You could do it.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, now who's a shitty actor? You need a plastic penguin. Can't pretend there's a penguin in front of you. I feel like I could pretend there was a penguin.

[Bald Bryan]

They got to do an over. They got to have a black shoulder in there.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, I see. Oh, over the shoulder. I understand.

[Allison Rosen]

Do you need to do a scene with the penguin right now?

[Adam Carolla]

No, I think I could.

[Allison Rosen]

Okay. What's the penguin doing?

[Adam Carolla]

What's.

[Allison Rosen]

What's a classic penguin thing to do?

[Adam Carolla]

What's its motivation or what it's doing?

[Allison Rosen]

Okay.

[Bald Bryan]

Snap at you.

[Allison Rosen]

The penguin is eating fish and snapping with you.

[Adam Carolla]

I.

[Allison Rosen]

Snapping at you.

[Adam Carolla]

I have to give him one of those names like Samson, you know, stupid names. Bitey. I bet you wish you had some of this delicious herring sandwich, don't you? Oh. Oh, that's a cute little. That's a. That's when they're cute. So. But they didn't have the animatronic one. Like, usually there's one that'll, like, just move its head the right way or, you know, guys controlling. With the remote control from the other room.

[Bald Bryan]

They might have. No, I think they did a cg, actually. I don't think there was one, but there might have been one. When? One day. I wasn't there.

[Adam Carolla]

Have you seen the movie?

[Bald Bryan]

No.

[Adam Carolla]

Why not?

[Bald Bryan]

I don't know. I. First of all, it's hard to watch yourself in a movie because you're like, that's a great movie. And everybody makes sense. And then you see yourself standing there like, what a dork.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm having no trouble at all watching you right now.

[Bald Bryan]

Oh, come on, now.

[Adam Carolla]

I mean it. So you don't want to watch yourself.

[Bald Bryan]

Why did you unbutton your shirt? What was that?

[Adam Carolla]

It's getting hot.

[Bald Bryan]

He's getting his belt up.

[Adam Carolla]

Penguins aren't the only folks who can puff their chest out. So. All right, no. Let me get this straight. You haven't seen the movie yet. You will see it, though. You're going to go to premiere, right?

[Bald Bryan]

June 12th.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you'll go to that. And Jim. Jim Carrey will be there.

[Bald Bryan]

I've never been in a big movie like this before, so.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah, you gotta go. Well, Gray's Anatomy. It's not a big movie, but.

[Bald Bryan]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Pretty damn big show, right? Yeah.

[Bald Bryan]

No, but this is like.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, this is. This is gonna be this hundred million dollar.

[Bald Bryan]

Yeah, I think so.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. They'll be disappointed if it makes under like 200 million bucks.

[Bald Bryan]

Yeah, they'll be crying.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, that's. That's why you got to be freaked out if you're a Jim Carrey. Because, look, I mean, everything you do can't turn to gold. And it can be 200 million bucks on everything. And maybe there's thing there's some sort of international safety net that'll never let him fail because eventually it'll make a couple hundred million bucks internationally.

[Bald Bryan]

I don't think. I don't. You know what? I thought that too when I started, and I don't think there's a safety net anymore. I think it's on his shoulders to do it. And I think if he has a flop, then he knows that that's going to be pretty much it. That, you know, he's getting older and his career will fade away. He has to make this work. He does. He has. Every day. He knows that.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, he hasn't done a movie in a while. Right. Or she had a big release. I'm looking at Paul Bryan because he's gay. Right.

[Giovanni]

Speaking of gay, he did a small movie called I love you, Philip Morris.

[Bald Bryan]

One of my favorite movies.

[Giovanni]

Yeah, it was good. Didn't get much release here in America, but it was kind of controversial in the sense that he played a outwardly gay guy.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[Giovanni]

So kind of tough finding release out.

[Bald Bryan]

With Ewan McGregor that then they have a love affair in a Texas prison.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, that's right. Pretty great movie. That's right. And that's fairly recent, but Jim Carrey.

[Giovanni]

Has had a big movie in a while. Like a big, big, you know, Hollywood movie in a while.

[Adam Carolla]

Right under. Understood. So. And he looks like Rip Tor in there, but this is damn exciting stuff. Oh, Brian. Always ready with the rip. Just dynamite. James, I'm gonna tell you about something, and I'm gonna invite you over to my home to see the finished version because you were there very early on when I was hammering away mangrate. You do any barbecuing there, James?

[Bald Bryan]

Me? Yeah, you do. Yeah, you do.

[Adam Carolla]

Every week. Yeah, I like that.

[Bald Bryan]

I just had one like two nights ago for Memorial Day.

[Adam Carolla]

Perfect.

[Bald Bryan]

And the Sunday before that, too.

[Adam Carolla]

Perfect. And you probably know your way around the grill and you got the marinade thing going and you know how to do it and your grill's good. Sure.

[Bald Bryan]

All that. No, no, I have one of those little round Webers.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, okay. Let me give you an upgrade. Upgrate. That's what I call that. Upgrate the man grate. That's right. It is a. Let's show a picture of this thing so that James can see it. That is cast iron. And so you put these things together and you put them on top of your grill. You don't remove your stuff. You just throw it on top. And now you're cooking like a steakhouse. The thing is cooking searing on piping hot. 100% cast iron. 100% made in America. This stuff is awesome. We've been using this for years. They keep sending us over boxes and we don't know what to do with them because it's too heavy to move. Point is this 1999 Father's Day special. Give him something he's going to actually love and something he'll cherish and keep and use for the rest of his ever loving Life. Click on Man Great. Click on the Man Great. Banner on AdamCarolla.com and order today, the exclusive bonus. They'll give you the. I think this picture of our grill is. Which took four of them and we stacked them up and it's. It's a totally different grilling experience. I kid you not. The man who invented this is a computer scientist who makes durable laptop computers like the kind the army uses and stuff. And he just did this because he said, fuck it, I love grilling and something's missing from my life. And next thing you know, he's got the man grate.

[James Tupper]

Nerd.

[Adam Carolla]

Not a nerd. An American nerd. Thank you very much. All right, so what do we do? James Tupper go out and see. Well, not quite yet, but when it hits the theater, Mr. Poppers penguins out June 17th. Come on, we got to get Jim Carrey. We cannot let that man fail because he'll turn on himself. He will. You know it's gonna be ugly. You don't want to see that side of Jim Carrey also. And by the way, you can check it out online. You go to popperspenguins.com and find out where it's playing near you, I'm guessing. See a trailer or two and Grey's Anatomy coming back. New episodes this fall on abc. We'll be looking for your new movie with all the smoking hot chicks and come by the house, bring the kitties and do a little carpentry together. So until next time, this is Adam Carolla for Bald Brine. James Tupper. And of course, Allison Rosen saying, mahalo, whoever stole my inhaler, I demand you.

[Giovanni]

Return it post haste. All right, this is ADAM Kolla Show 581. Coming up next, we have Adam Kolla Show 680 featuring Mike Judge. Adam and Mike Judge, one on one, 2011.

[Adam Carolla]

Hope you guys enjoy. As I told you I'd be going to New York City. I'm sitting in my hotel room right now. We brought Gary out with us. He's engineering this thing. And I told you New York would bring some good and interesting guests as well. And we're starting off in that vein. Mike Judge is here. Big fan. Good to see you, Mike.

[James Tupper]

Good to see you.

[Adam Carolla]

Mike and I had some dinner last night with some friends, and Mike is out here for Comic Con. Yes.

[James Tupper]

Yeah. Out promoting the new Beavis and Butthead series.

[Adam Carolla]

Beavis and Butthead. I've seen it's MTV, by the way, coming back October 27th and 10 o' clock, 9 o' clock central, and 24 new episodes. I've been working with your guys on my Fox thing. Good guys. Al Jeweler and Krinsky, and they've been working on this thing. Beavis and Butthead was one of the cartoons that made me laugh out loud more than almost any television show. Although I don't say it was better than almost any television show. I would just laugh out loud. Like when he'd do Cornholio and stuff, you'd just be laughing out loud. I thought it was a really good show. Don't get me wrong.

[James Tupper]

I kind of feel the same way. No, it's not a, you know, it's not a great show. It's just funny.

[Adam Carolla]

It's really funny. And the new ones are what? What's different about the new ones?

[James Tupper]

Well, Beavis and Butthead are pretty much the same. They'll probably always be the same. But it is. It is. It's set in the modern world. I mean. Yeah, modern world. It was. It's only like 14 years ago. We were.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[James Tupper]

Stopped. But things have changed a little bit. You know, I mean, it's. But the show. The show's the same format. And one thing that's different is they're watching shows like sixteen and Pregnant and Jersey Shore and all that stuff. But they're also watching music videos. But it's the same thing of like, you know, a cartoon that's, you know, has like two or three, you know, interrupted by whatever, two or three videos.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. And. And, and they're commenting on. Is it all MTV stuff? Are we able to clear other stuff.

[James Tupper]

And then we cleared some other stuff. Well, let's see. UFC fights. They're also. Well, we're. We've only done one so far, but having them review movies, which turned out to be harder to clear than I thought.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, it's a weird. The clearance world is weird in that.

[James Tupper]

The clearance world, that's changed too, by the way, since the Clearance world.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, well, you know, it's sort of like music. It's like if you make. If you make a movie and you want to use some obscure song from the 60s, they'll go, well, that'll be 50 grand.

[James Tupper]

Oh, I know.

[Adam Carolla]

And then you go, wait a minute. I'm doing you a favor, because no one is downloading this song. It's completely off everyone's radar, and it's getting no spins on the radio. So if I put this song in my movie, then people will hear it, then they'll download it. So you should be paying me 50 grand to put this song in the movie. And then you get this weird. It's like, who's doing who the favor? I would argue that you reviewing a movie or UFC or whatever it is is sort of advertising for them. Right.

[James Tupper]

Although Beavis and Butthead say some not very nice things, I guess so that makes them, you know, nervous that way. But.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[James Tupper]

Well, with the movie, I mean. Yeah, I never understood that either. I mean, actually, like, in, you know, people who don't make movies, obviously, you know, don't know it. Like, you. I've. There's some pretty obscure Latin song from a guy in Mexico City that was recorded, like, in 59 that I wanted for the Beavis and Button movie. $80,000. Right. But it's like. It's like. And if you really want the song, then it's like, well, you know, is it worth that much? But, yeah, I. I'm. I'm always surprised that. Yeah, we got. We got. I mean, mtv, by the way. Like, they. They used to get all their music videos for free, right? In fact, you know, if anything, a record company would probably be wanting to do some payola to get it on there. But. But the. And the same thing with Beavis and Butted. But I guess now, because the Internet, you just get. They don't need mtv, right? Like, they used to. So. So we're paying for videos now we're talking.

[Adam Carolla]

We're with a friend who had a friend who loved Idiocracy, and I loved Idiocracy, and of course, Extract and Office Space. It's kind Of. I mean, I don't know how you feel about, about this, but your movies sort of take on this sort of cult status at a certain point. But we were talking friend of mine named Terry before you got there, and he's like, oh, man, Mike Judge is coming. And I loved Idiocracy. And I said, I loved Idiocracy as well. And then we're talking about, well, why didn't it make more money or why wasn't it more successful? And I said, well, that's, that's what the movie was about. I mean, they're making fun of the people that make movies successful. The whole reason NASCAR's popular is because of those people. And then you're sort of making fun of those people like it was almost dead before it was alive because you're making fun of the audience. That makes Adam Sandler rich in a weird way, right?

[James Tupper]

Well, yeah. I mean, it's, you know, it's weird. Like there was. There were a few moments like, okay, you know, in that, in that movie for people haven't seen it, that there's, you know, it's in the future and 500 years in future and everybody's gotten really stupid. And so the number one movie in the movie is.

[Adam Carolla]

There you go.

[James Tupper]

It's just a movie called Ass and Nothing Man's Ass farting for like an hour. And so we actually shot, you know, five minutes of Ass because we needed to. Yeah, we filled the theater with these extras who were actually. Were mostly juvenile delinquents from this place. It's kind of a reform school. And I'm playing this thing and they are laughing their asses off at the.

[Adam Carolla]

Thing that you're making fun of making fun of.

[James Tupper]

And I'm just looking at going, why we should just release this, you know, release ass instead of Idiocracy. Maybe it would do better.

[Adam Carolla]

I've experienced it in my own small way where you're doing, you know, I did the man show so you'd be in front of that audience and we'd have a joke about, you know, your, your friends and they always, they have their dads and they always have those fucked out stupid sayings that aren't funny and no one cares about, but they feel like they have to keep repeating them and laying on them. And I said, my buddy Donnie, his dad will say, you know, four times a day. Excuses are like assholes. Everyone has one and they all stink. And so we're using it as an example of a crappy. And of course the audience erupts. In laughter. Not ironically, but they think that one is funny. And so you want to, like, yell at them. No, that's. I'm saying that's stupid. That's bad. But now they're all laughing at ass the movie. And then you realize, oh, that's what we're dealing with here.

[James Tupper]

Yeah, it was kind of a. Then again, you know, I guess. Yeah, a lot of that stuff can work on two levels. Which was. Which is what I was hoping for, but didn't. You know, it seems like most of Idiocracy didn't work on two levels for. Otherwise, it would have done better, I guess. No, I mean, it does. You know, has. It has gotten, like. I've gotten a lot of just. I've gotten a lot of love for that movie in the last year, I'd say. I don't. I don't know why that is.

[Adam Carolla]

I'll tell you. I'll tell you why. Because it's very good. And. And these things will sort of be passed around sort of.

[James Tupper]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

You know, virally and from one guy to the next. But also, I think people feel like it's their movie. Like.

[James Tupper]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Because it didn't have big national success. Everyone goes, I'm claiming ownership of this.

[James Tupper]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

And then they love. See, nobody says to anybody, hey, man, I don't know if you've checked out this flick called the Hangover. But then, because everyone else goes, I saw that movie nine times, dickhead. I told you about it. You know, so you don't feel like you're bringing something to the conversational party. But there is that thing. It's. It's like an independent band, you know, some indie band or something, where you go, hey, man, have you checked the barstools out? And I go, I don't know who that band is. And you go, oh, man, you got to dig on this. So people. I just made that name up, but it wouldn't be a bad for.

[James Tupper]

For an indie sit there going, hey, I got to check out.

[Adam Carolla]

Check out the bar stools. So I do feel people do that with Idiocracy, and they feel like they need to. Yeah, we. We made ourselves a movie called Windy City Heat that has the same sort of thing. Weird Underground.

[James Tupper]

That's my. Yeah, I know. I've. That's the one I've watched 100 times. I think it's.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, thank you.

[James Tupper]

Oh, yeah, no, I. I claimed I was just telling someone about that movie, like, two days ago, but. Well, that's another one. I. I mean, it's it seems to still be growing in its audience, right? Or no. Yeah, I mean, it's like people bring.

[Adam Carolla]

It up from time to time. Yeah. And the ones. Here's what it is. You get a movie like the Hangover, 5 million people saw that movie. Once you get a movie like Windy City Heat, five people saw each a million times.

[James Tupper]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Which is not really what you want. It's like. It's like you wrote a book, you sold two copies, and it was handed off to every single person in. In North America, but you still only got paid for the two books. But then people come up all the time and go, hey, man.

[James Tupper]

Well, I know, like. Like I'll get asked, you know, like, you know, so you like to make these cult movies, and I say, no, I don't. I don't want. I want them to be big hits like the Hangover. They just aren't. Except the Beavis and Butthead movie was. But. Yeah, but like. But I. Yeah, I mean, but then, you know, I mean, I have those movies like Windy City Heat or Big Lebowski, although that's become so, so huge, you can't even call it a cult, but. Or movies like, you know, Badlands, or there's a movie called Primer that's really cool. The guy in Dallas made. That's another one of those ones that, you know, I talk about. But yeah, it's, you know, it's preferable to just have a big ass hit.

[Adam Carolla]

It'd be nice. I wonder if there's a little bit of a steeping process that needs to take place. Like, it needs to sit for a few years, and then people start to rediscover it or pass it around. I mean, if it doesn't get out of the gate.

[James Tupper]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Like, you know, it didn't. I want to talk about the early life, Mike Judge's early life. I know you grew up in New Mexico.

[James Tupper]

Yeah, Albuquerque.

[Adam Carolla]

And what did your folks do?

[James Tupper]

My dad's an archaeologist. Well, he's retired now. My mom was librarian. She taught Spanish in high school. Yeah. So my dad was an archaeologist in Chaco Canyon was one of the main places he. He worked, which is.

[Adam Carolla]

What was he looking for?

[James Tupper]

Looking for? He was. It was Anasazi Indian. Was. Was his specialty. Native Americans. That's what you call him, the Anasazi. Like a pre Columbian Anasazi. You know, it's. It's funny, like, my. You autumn, you just kind of instinctively think that what your parents do is boring.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[James Tupper]

I think kids, like when I. When my kids were little, I mean, now they think that it's cool that I do what I do, but they're just like, oh, dad with his cartoons, whatever. And I was the same way then. Like, you know, when I became old, now I'm interested in archaeology and. Yeah, but. Yeah, so it's actually because I used to say my dad's an archaeologist and people say, oh, that's interesting. And I'd say, really? Why do people always say that? But now it is interesting.

[Adam Carolla]

Would he work. Was he employed by the university?

[James Tupper]

Yeah, UNM and then the park service. And he did. He did a lot of. He's actually excavating, you know, Anasazi ruins.

[Adam Carolla]

And did he have any big finds?

[James Tupper]

Yeah, I mean, there's. Well, there's a. There's a solstice marker there in Chaco Canyon. That's really, really cool. It's a. And that was. Yeah, that was. He found that.

[Adam Carolla]

I read about the discovery of a 900 year old slot machine that your dad may have uncovered. And one of the. One of the cups they used to transport nickels. Yes, so. So your dad's it pull. So your dad's going through now. It's got to be kind of weird. Not quite morbid like a mortician, but morbid like you're staring at the past all day. Like whatever it is you're holding, whoever held it last has been dead for 500 years.

[James Tupper]

Yeah, I, Yeah. And I got so used to that it didn't even now and I, you know, especially hearing it put like that. Yes, it's. It has, but they're actually the thing. They were what my dad, A lot of what he did and like actually lobbied for is to, you know, laws to. So that people aren't just going digging stuff up because you want to. You want to leave it there so that if there's better technology later to go, you know, figure stuff out.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[James Tupper]

But yeah, lots of stuff. That's.

[Adam Carolla]

Anyway, your dad's retired.

[James Tupper]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Do you have to retire from that? I don't feel like you ever need to. I feel like you just become a fossil at a certain point and I.

[James Tupper]

Don'T think you make enough money to retire.

[Adam Carolla]

Somebody digs you up. But I always feel like, hey, put these khaki shorts on and go over there, look at something.

[James Tupper]

Well, yeah, that's like when Raiders of the Lost Ark came out, you know, my dad would just. He'd say, yeah, I saw that movie, but it's kind of boring to me. It's just like going to work.

[Adam Carolla]

Giant ball so grow up in New Mexico and your dreams are to. And I see here you graduate from UC San Diego with a degree in physics.

[James Tupper]

Yep.

[Adam Carolla]

So you were planning on doing what?

[James Tupper]

Well, I was engineering, basically. I mean, I was going to be an engineering major. It was one of those, you know, it was just hammered into us in high school, like, oh, science. You get one of those companies, everyone's going to offer you a job. Which turns out to not be true. But yeah, it wasn't like I had a burning desire to do physics, although I find it really interesting. But I just thought, this will get me a job.

[Adam Carolla]

And so you graduate. This is. What year do you graduate?

[James Tupper]

85.

[Adam Carolla]

And you start looking for a job. But obviously there's always been, always a creative side that you've had and always a comedy side that you've had that got kind of put on a shelf somewhere. I mean, they don't really, I'm imagining growing up in New Mexico, they don't really talk that much about nurturing the inner, inner comedian and that sort of stuff. It's kind of neither here nor there. It's actually, it's a detriment.

[James Tupper]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Because it gets in the way of studying and being a good citizen and that kind of stuff.

[James Tupper]

Yeah, definitely. I mean, there's no, it's, I mean, growing up in a place like Albuquerque, especially back then, you just, you don't hear of. I never heard of anybody going into any kind of entertainment business, comedy, but I did. Me and a friend of mine just, we know, you know, we had this fantasy that we were going to do sketch comedy, but like, you know, if even in music, because I was a musician too. Like any kind of creative thing. It seems like in a town like Albuquerque, you do something and everyone just kind of like, what an asshole. You can't be any good, you're from here. What, you know, that kind of attitude. And so, but yeah, I always wanted to try comedy or filmmaking, but now.

[Adam Carolla]

You have pressure because you have a physics degree which costs somebody some money and. Yeah, there's something for you to ignore.

[James Tupper]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

Put aside.

[James Tupper]

Yeah. And also, I mean, I, I had, you know, I was, I kind of hit rock bottom right after graduation. I was so. I, I was such a. I don't know, I, I didn't, you know, people were going to, on campus interviews and doing all that stuff, and I just didn't do it. I was just lazy. I just thought, well, you know, I'll have a physics degree, of course I'll get a job, you know, right. It was actually really hard to get a job. And I finally got an engineering job and then realized, like, I always thought, okay, that'll be my day job. And then I'll pursue this stuff, you know, in my spare time. But when you're working all day long, the thing about engineering is it you can't daydream because it's occupying your mind.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[James Tupper]

It's not like a manual labor job where, you know, you're mopping the floor and you can think about other stuff.

[Adam Carolla]

Look, I saw Flashdance. I understand how it works. When you're building ships all day, you should have become a welder. You're super foxy and building a giant.

[James Tupper]

Loft that you live in.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. When you're working at Tig welder all day, there's plenty, plenty of places for your mind to go. But when your actual mind is being occupied now that's, you know what.

[James Tupper]

And then you get home and you're just completely drained.

[Adam Carolla]

And, you know, that's a very interesting point, one that has never really come up on this show because I always did manual labor. And so when you're creative type and you're doing this repetitious manual labor, like almost working on a conveyor belt, except for I might have been stripping a roof or demoing out some stucco or something like that, the first deal is, is your mind has to go somewhere else, otherwise you'll go insane.

[James Tupper]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

So when you're cleaning carpets and all you're doing is literally staring at your feet in a carpet wand for six hours, your mind has to go somewhere else. Otherwise I think you'll go nuts.

[James Tupper]

Yeah. I mean, all the jobs I'd worked during college and in the summer were all like that. They were like. I worked in a cafeteria for. I mean, I worked at Jack in the Box. I worked everywhere.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[James Tupper]

And movie theater and. Yeah. And you. And it just. It didn't hit me until. Had this engineering job that it's. This is. You know, and some of that stuff can be kind of interesting. I mean, we were working on a thing. It was the F18 stuff, but it wasn't like. And that sounds like the Hornet fighter jet. Yeah, the. Yeah. And. But I was in a cubicle with schematics and software printouts and, you know, it's. It can be interesting for a little while. I like the people I worked with.

[Adam Carolla]

Is that Lockheed or Northrop or Grumman? Northrop. Grumman.

[James Tupper]

Northrop Grumman.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. And so, so, yeah, the thing about. Well, it's sort of like it's sort of like.

[James Tupper]

I wasn't working at. I was working at a company that was subcontractor.

[Adam Carolla]

But anyway, you're working on an F18 except for you're working on a boring part of the F18 in a test.

[James Tupper]

He has the self test software, the. That the F18 has that tests all its electronics.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[James Tupper]

Automatic test stuff and these systems that go on the carriers and. Yeah, but I'm just. Yeah, occasionally I would get to go on base and you'd see them out on the Runway, but you know, it wasn't. Yeah, I was sitting in a cubicle, so.

[Adam Carolla]

So you're coming home and your, your head is tired.

[James Tupper]

Yeah, that's the thing. It's.

[Adam Carolla]

It's right.

[James Tupper]

And you know, there's manual labor jobs can suck too. But for some reason that was. I realized, okay, if I'm. If I'm gonna try to go into comedy or. And I was still playing music at night some, but I just realized I don't think you can. You can't especially. People don't work. People don't work just eight hours anymore. I mean it seems like most jobs, you know, it's like nine or ten hours at least.

[Adam Carolla]

So now you're. Are you a couple years into this? Couple years out of college?

[James Tupper]

I lasted about a year there. A little over a year.

[Adam Carolla]

And so we're talking about 86, 87.

[James Tupper]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

And you're thinking about comedy, you're thinking about music.

[James Tupper]

Yeah, I was a bass player and I was actually playing three or four nights a week. And so the whole, the whole route, you know, the grind. I was like working five days at the engineering job and then playing like Friday, Saturday, Sunday or more. I was making good money. But then I just quit the job and then I just did music full time for a while and I'd been making money at it already. So I realized like, okay, I can make a living doing this and at least I've got time to.

[Adam Carolla]

So at this point, the barstools are starting to get some traction. A little local playing town bar stools. Do you have a good band?

[James Tupper]

I always just played with. I played upright bass and electric bass and I usually ended up playing with blues bands and blues guy like I ended up playing with. Yeah, I was actually pretty lucky. I played with people I probably didn't deserve to play with. I moved to Dallas and started playing with this guy. It was like a duo, Anson Funderberg and Sam Myers. And Sam was an old blues guy that had. Eric Clapton had done a couple of his Songs or one or. Yeah. Sleeping in the ground. And he was. So we would tour all over the country, in Europe, I mean, not, you know, not huge, not rock star stuff, but playing like nice, you know.

[Adam Carolla]

So you're making, you're making a living.

[James Tupper]

Yeah, and making a living, like doing.

[Adam Carolla]

Playing music.

[James Tupper]

Yeah, as much as I was making in engineering, just about.

[Adam Carolla]

And is your. How's your. How's your dad with this stuff?

[James Tupper]

Oh, they were, they were fun. You know, I was, I was usually, you know, the only one that seemed to have a steady job and of the three kids. No, actually, yeah. No, they were. By this time, you know, they were. They were all, you know, I was, I was off on my own. I didn't, you know. Yeah, they were all cool with it as long as I wasn't asking for money.

[Adam Carolla]

So you, you're living in Texas, you're traveling around, you're. You're making, you're out of the cubicle. We're getting into the later 80s here. Yeah, you're making money and imagine getting laid because, you know, you're playing.

[James Tupper]

I was Same, Same girlfriend since college. I was married for 20 years, so we got married. She had a job in Dallas and. Yeah, we were. Yeah, things were good. I mean, actually she had a pretty good job, so I had this kind of.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, she had a nice base.

[James Tupper]

Yeah, yeah. If I, If I. But I was always working. I mean, I never stopped.

[Adam Carolla]

And you had your, your blues buddies that you could always, always talk.

[James Tupper]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Redundant hydraulic systems with and stuff like that if things got slow. Yes, I'm sure they're big F18 fans. They love. They love naval aviation, those guys. I mean, if I know blues singers, I don't put words in your mouth, but. So now you're traveling around, you're doing pretty good, but you're. Now you're starting to think about comedy.

[James Tupper]

Yeah. And I was, you know, I. I wanted to try to. I was. One point, I was thinking of trying to like write for National Lampoon. Then you look in the magazine, we don't take submissions. It always seemed like you had to know somebody.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[James Tupper]

And I didn't know anybody in, you know, in any of that entertainment business, so. But I. What happened. I'd also wanted to. I was just always been into. I wanted to try doing animation. When I was a. When I was a kid, I used to do flipbook stuff. It never occurred to me to do animation as a way to get into comedy until I. I used to go to those animation festivals that used to tour around you know, there'd be like different ones. And there's one playing in Dallas and there was a film by a local guy that. And they had his cells in the lobby and he's. His drawings. He wasn't there, but his name's Paul Claire Hout. And I was just looking at him going, wow, there's a guy in this town that does this. And I also used to think, you must have to have a ton of money and buy these cameras. And then it just occurred to me, you can probably rent time on a camera. And. And so that's when it clicked that I just. I just became determined that I was gonna figure out how to make an animated film.

[Adam Carolla]

And. You made an animated. I mean, this is great, Beavis.

[James Tupper]

And I was still, still a musician. I had actually started going back to graduate school in math. I was going to become a math teacher because I didn't want to be a musician. I didn't want to go on the road like that. And I was, you know, I'm not a songwriter, I'm not a singer. So you're always at the mercy of whatever hillbilly guy that you know. And I had a great gig actually, after I was playing with this guy, Doyle Bramhall. And it was perfect because he didn't want to go on the road. I was really lucky to have that gig because he. So I was doing that, going to school, just like taking a couple classes and then. But that was just sort of, you know, so I could like tell the in laws this is my plan. But. And I was really making these as.

[Adam Carolla]

A bass player, constantly being plagued by fans telling you to play the opening lick from Barney Miller.

[James Tupper]

I was gonna say Barney Miller or.

[Adam Carolla]

Smoke on the Water too, but that's.

[James Tupper]

Yeah, right.

[Adam Carolla]

But the bass, I mean, you must have had to.

[James Tupper]

Oh, yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[James Tupper]

King of the Road was another trailer is good for.

[Adam Carolla]

Trailer for Sailor, right? Yeah. So Beavis and Butthead, then. When does that, when does, when does that idea pop in your head?

[James Tupper]

Well, I was, I bought this Bullex camera and I was. I've, you know, I animated. I got Peg Bar, I did the whole thing and I animated it. Just tested something out on it. Just drew a guy making a goofy face and whatever. And I got the film back from the lab and you know, like, holy shit, it looks like a cartoon. This is amazing. And then I just got this. I was like, wow, I can. I can make a film. I can. And so I just started drawing in a sketchbook. And there was. There was a guy I was Trying to draw that I went to high school with, who's nothing like Beavis or Butt Head, but he was. In fact, he was a really very smart, kind of nerdy guy. And he'd sit in the front of the class. We had a really hot calculus teacher. This girl was a former Dallas Cowboys cheerleader. Wow. Came to Albuquerque to teach calculus. It was just unheard of. No one ever seen a hot teacher at all.

[Adam Carolla]

The weird thing is, if she had had sex with you when you were 17, she would have been arrested. And my policy would be this. If she did have sex with you or one of your 16 and a half year old buddies and it got to court and they were trying to send her to jail, if I was defending her, here's what I would say. I'd pull you up to the stand and I'd say, sir, have you beat off to that experience? And you'd say, yes. And he'd say, how many times? He'd say, well, 20 minutes ago during the lunch break, and then probably several dozen times between the time it happened and now. All right, your honor, how can something be a crime that somebody beats off too? You know what I mean? I mean, if you take arson, if you take aggravated assault, if you take grand larceny, nobody beats off. That I would argue no victim. If the victim is masturbating to what happened. Yeah.

[James Tupper]

I don't beat off to my car getting broken into.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[James Tupper]

It's funny when something like that will happen. And on the local news, the Victim was a 17 year old boy.

[Adam Carolla]

I always laugh that. Well, really, the only injury was the carpal tunnel syndrome that was sustained from all the high fiving that went on with all your peers. But it'd be pretty. It'd be a weird defense. A little better than the twinkie defense. But the beat off defense, I feel would be. It'd be pretty provocative. But if you're in the. If you're, you know, a jury, I'd go, ladies and gentlemen, the jury.

[James Tupper]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

This man is beat off to this experience. How big a victim are we talking about here?

[James Tupper]

And you want her to go to jail for. Yeah, right.

[Adam Carolla]

So said a hot teacher.

[James Tupper]

Oh, yeah. Oh. So the kid. This kid would just laugh at everything she said. And he had this laugh. It was kind of like he'd bite his bottom lip and just kind of go. Which I kind of became the Beavis laugh, which is morning. Right. But sounds weird on these headphones. But so I. Anyway, I don't. For some reason I was. For some reason, I Was trying to draw this kid and I did. It didn't look like him, but I did. I tried three or four times and one of them ended up being Beavis and another one ended up being Butthead. The actual kid looked probably more like Butthead, but.

[Adam Carolla]

And his. Beavis.

[James Tupper]

What's that, bae?

[Adam Carolla]

Is Beavis the name based on anything?

[James Tupper]

There's a. There was a kid who's nothing like Beavis. Again, it was just. He was a. Actually like a football player. He was older. He's a friend of my brothers. And I just remember this, this kind of nerdy kid just out of the blue to sing Beavis is cool. Like he just thought he was an admirer of this, this guy. I won't say his first name, I guess. Yeah, his last name was Beavis.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, I see. And the, in the, and the. I bet he's pretty happy about this legacy.

[James Tupper]

Well, except my sister. This was like in the 90s. My sister sent me this. You know, there's a part of the newspaper where they list all the petitions and things. There's one. It was like, you know, I forget what it is. Like Charles Beavis filed petition, blah, blah, blah. Petition to change last name.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, really?

[James Tupper]

It wasn't him, but it was, I think it's not a real common name. It's actually supposedly it's a first name of like rich people around here. Up here.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, really?

[James Tupper]

Like rich. You know, Beavis Throckmorton III or something.

[Adam Carolla]

You know, I was working on a little animatic for Fox called Mr. Burcham. And Birchum's named after a guy I played Pop Warner football with. I liked it because it sort of felt like wood. Yeah, Birch in it.

[James Tupper]

It's a great guy.

[Adam Carolla]

But the guy's name was Burcham and.

[James Tupper]

It'S just his last name.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, the guy's last name was Burcham. Yeah, he was on my team. And it just, it always. I always liked that, but it always had a good, good, good wood sound. So this is the beginning of Beavis and Butthead. Now at a certain point you have to figure out the brainchild of watching the MTV videos comes in.

[James Tupper]

Well, what happened was I had these drawings and when I'd go back and look at them, they'd make me laugh. And I'd drawn Beavis with a lighter in one hand and Bug in the other. I don't know, it seemed like growing up in Albuquerque there were just all these like bored, just sick minded teenagers around just doing stupid shit. Like. And I was just kind of Thinking about something in general like that I didn't know what I was going to do with them. And then I just came up with this two minute short called Frog Baseball.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, right.

[James Tupper]

Which somebody had. Which got me into trouble with animal rights people. Even though it's just drawings, but somebody I just heard some kid once talk about, oh, when you lived over there. Yeah, we used to play frog baseball. I thought, oh, does that mean.

[Adam Carolla]

Right, right.

[James Tupper]

And so there was this sick and twisted midnight festival animation thing. And they were like, you know, starting to pay some money and they said, can you do something that's sick and twisted? And I. And so that's. And I thought of that when this, you know, that I'd heard this kid say this frog baseball thing. So I made that short and then I made another one where they go to the. To a monster truck show. Well, what. MTV had a show called Liquid Television.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[James Tupper]

And they. But I'd already done. I'd done three other cartoons before it. Three other short films around two minutes before that. So Beavis and Butthead was the fourth. The fourth and fifth shorts that I did.

[Adam Carolla]

And. And when. Sorry, so we're getting into the early 90s here.

[James Tupper]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Beavis and Butthead, 93.

[James Tupper]

I went on the air. It played on liquid television in 92.

[Adam Carolla]

And.

[James Tupper]

And they were. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

And the response was overwhelming.

[James Tupper]

Yeah, and it was. Yeah, it was. It had already gotten like a pretty good buzz off being on Liquid Television. And they wanted to make them into VJs. Kind of. They were saying, what about. And I didn't. For some reason, I couldn't wrap my head around the idea of Beavis and Butthead standing there with a microphone talking, you know, like being a vj. But I like the idea of what if they, you know, them watching videos and just talking to each other right on the couch and.

[Adam Carolla]

Do you own all the Beavis and Butthead stuff, you know, when a T shirt is sold?

[James Tupper]

Oh, no. Although I've negotiated back. In fact, I sold it to mtv. I just sold it to him for very little money. Back when I was just, you know, living with my.

[Adam Carolla]

Not the mtv.

[James Tupper]

I know very little money in Dallas and you know, my ex wife and she was still working her job, but, you know, it was animation. It's not like you can do it that much. It would take me six weeks to do two minutes by myself.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[James Tupper]

So it wasn't like if I said, no, I don't want to sell it, which I did at first. And it dragged on. We negotiated for like six Months off and on, and then I finally just thought, well, I'm not gonna. I've done two shorts with these guys. I'm not gonna do more.

[Adam Carolla]

Right?

[James Tupper]

And so I just sold it to him for, I don't know, $20,000 or something like that.

[Adam Carolla]

MTV.

[James Tupper]

I negotiated back. I just want to, like, I. Now I own. We're like clothes. I think we're 50. 50 on the whole thing.

[Adam Carolla]

On the 2.0 part of it. Come back at least. Well, the thing about MTV is we started our conversation talking about, like, the song, who's doing who the favor. So, you know, if you buy a song for 50 grand, but shouldn't they pay you 50 grand for playing the song and your movie? And MTV is sort of that way, and that. Their thing is, look, pay you. You should be paying us for the exposure we're gonna give you. And because they break people, they're. They're not. You don't end up there at the end of your career.

[James Tupper]

Right.

[Adam Carolla]

There's one day no one's heard of Carson Daly or Snooki or whoever. The names keep going as the years wear on, and the next year, Dennis Leary or whoever, they're sort of breaking, and it's like, should they have paid Dennis Leary to do those shorts, or should he have paid them? This a little bit different. But you're sitting here guessing you're a millionaire. Yeah, it's sort of because of mtv. Oh, I know they're cheap dicks, don't get me wrong. But they still end up, when the dust settles, making you a lot of money.

[James Tupper]

Yeah, that's the thing. Like, I don't. You know, I was. Like, when I was first on Howard Stern or, you know, like, I was. They were giving me some shit about, you know, I sold everything off to mtv and, you know, other people. I don't know how that even gets out there, but it. Yeah, I.

[Adam Carolla]

People are asked why I did a.

[James Tupper]

Bad deal, but I never regret it. I mean, look, if I. You look at. I don't. I think it was actually a smart decision. If I hadn't done it, where would it. You know, I wouldn't have made. I would have made a couple more short films. Nobody would have heard of me. I would never have gotten King of the Hill and all this other stuff, you know, so.

[Adam Carolla]

King of the hill. 12 seasons. How many seasons?

[James Tupper]

12 and a half. Well, 13. But the first one was a half season. 12.

[Adam Carolla]

13. Christ.

[James Tupper]

Yeah. Went on a while.

[Adam Carolla]

Speaking of paying the bills, Evoice. The virtual phone number that Answers and routes, calls your home, office or cell. One of our newer sponsors, real good guys. I think Brian has these guys new uses. These guys, they'll screen your calls automatically. They'll answer the urgent ones, but most importantly, they will have them transcribed into easy to read emails or text messages. And it's a E voice. It's what you call a radically better phone number. And the good news is you can try it for free. That's right. Six months free. Free for six months. What would. What would butthead say to six months of anything? Free. Whoa. Yeah, like if I said, hey, butthead, I'm gonna knee you in the groin for six months, but it'll be free.

[James Tupper]

That sounds like a good deal. I'm sitting down and doing the voices. I never do that.

[Adam Carolla]

Six months. I know. It helps to stand up. Like singing opera from a Barca lounger. Six months free. Go to evoice.com AdamCarolla and check it out. Hit the [e-mail] and again, hit the evoice.com Adam for six months free e voice. Radically better phone number. All right, we'll take a quick break. Be right back with more Mike Judge. Hey, Kenny's Ace man here. This week on Ace on the House. We talk about tankless water heaters. We talk about the dentists who don't toss the inline heaters.

[Bald Bryan]

What's the drywall thing called again?

[Adam Carolla]

A little drywall hole punch action and.

[Bald Bryan]

No, no, the.

[Adam Carolla]

The thing. Dunnage. We're talking about dunnage. And I do 20 minutes on left turn arrow. All coming up this week on Ace on the House. Dunnage. It's time for the voicemail of the day, brought to you by Evoice. A radically better phone number. Hey, Ace. With Halloween coming up, you guys might want to dress up in the studio. So I figured I'd point out a little time saver costume idea because I know the production budget is kind of low. Just know that you're only a few tweaks away from looking like birds from Sesame Street. And you got Bunsen, honeydew and Elvira right next to you. So trick or treat, you grumpy bastard. Leave us a message at 888-634-1744 and click the banner on AdamCola.com or go to Evoice.com Adam for a free six month trial. Yeah, back with great Mike Judge. And Mike, you're quiet, you're unassuming. Do you like it that way? I mean, do you like the part where you can walk up and down the streets and I mean, sort of. I don't know. I feel like you have your cake and eat it, too. You make your money, you have your creative outlet, you're respected. You can get tickets to any show, and people know who you are. But you get to walk out of this hotel and walk back to your hotel, and you don't get bothered by anyone.

[James Tupper]

Yeah, I mean, that's. That's probably the best. That's probably a good thing. I gotta admit, once in a blue moon, when I get recognized, especially, like, when it first started happening, I do kind of. I can see like. I kind of. I kind of go like, oh, I want to get recognized more like. Like, it's. It can. It can feel good. But then, you know, I've been around enough. You famous people that get recognized, it can be. It can be a hassle. So, yeah, I have probably, like, just the right. About once every three months, I get recognized, maybe. And I could. I could handle like, once every three weeks.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, it's like, the thing about the recognition thing is, is it's great, but only if it's on your schedule, right? If. If you're trying to go into a bar and it's full and the bouncer recognizes you, then that's a good thing. Yeah, but if you're picking your nose at a stoplight and some guy yells, hey, man, show, then it's not a good thing. You know what I'm saying? And so the problem is you don't get to pick and choose those moments. And then there's this weird thing where if you go out with other recognizable people, there's. Then it becomes this thing of who in the group gets recognized. Oh, like, there's that thing. There's that, you know, Jimmy and I've hung out for a million years, and there'd be times way back when the guy would hand him the camera and go, could you get a picture? Yeah, with me and my Loveline boy, Adam, and that. It's. I always feel bad. I don't feel bad if they don't recognize the other person in your recognizable group. I feel bad when they assign a task to them.

[James Tupper]

Yeah, that's. That's what I get. Like, if I'm hanging out with a famous person. Well, there's like, two things that always happen. One is, like, if you're at a dinner table and you got, you know, the famous. They'll. They'll wait until I'm talking to interrupt. They'll come up and they'll. It's. It's okay to interrupt the non celebrity. But the other thing, yeah, they'll. What I get is when, like, girls will be, you know, I'll be around, I don't know, whoever. And the girls will literally not. It's not like, can you take a picture? They just put the camera. They just. While they're. While they're, like, putting their arm around whoever, you know, celebrity guy, they're like, oh, yeah, let's take a picture. And it's, you know, like, dinkus over here will.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[James Tupper]

The camera. They don't even say, would you mind? Or anything.

[Adam Carolla]

Right?

[James Tupper]

That pisses me off. That's just, like, flat out rude. And that happens a lot.

[Adam Carolla]

Buddy, could you take a knee and cup Vince Vaughn's ball sack while I take a picture with him? I mean, I want you out. We'll crop you out. Stay down low. But I want Vince to look relaxed and unburping, Burdened by this event. Well, the thing is, I was thinking about. I know you're gonna go see Book of Mormon tonight. And it made me think about Matt and Trey. And then I realized, oh, I recognize those guys very clearly when I see those guys. And I realize, all right, well, they did basketball, but that side, they were on billboards.

[James Tupper]

Yeah, yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm trying to think, like. And then I started thinking about interviewing you. And then I realized I never really. I don't know Mike judge that well. I haven't interviewed him. I don't feel like I see Matt and Trey would pop up on the Tonight show and all that kind of stuff. And then I thought, I don't see Mike popping up lots of places. Is that intentional? Do they ask? Is it something you. Just a road you'd prefer not to go down? I mean, have you done the Tonight Show?

[James Tupper]

I haven't done. I've done Letterman four times back, you know, not since 99 was last time I did it. I was almost gonna do the Tonight Show. My daughter had a concert that night. It was the only night they could do it for. For Beavis. So I didn't. Didn't do it. But I don't. I guess I don't seek it out, but I don't mind doing it. I mean, I. It is. It is kind of cool to. To say, hey, I was on Letterman, you know, or on it, you know, I guess. Yeah, I guess I don't. It's not like I get asked all that much. I just don't ever ask. I don't. I've never had a publicist.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, you're in a weird sort of in between nether world of recognizable name, but not. Not a street. Not down on the street. Like, people don't point when you go walking down the street. And not quite a comedian, but not quite an actor. Like, and it's sort of. You're behind the scenes. There are also talents I've also been in.

[James Tupper]

Like, okay, like, I'm. I'm in an office space. I'm in that movie. I'm the manager talking about the pieces of flair. But I have glasses and a wig and a mustache. And I've had. And people. I didn't put my name in the credits, but people know that that's me. It's. I think one of the DVD said something about it, but, like, I'll have people because I don't look anything. If I put on a mustache, I look like a completely different person. And I've had people. Someone go, this Mike Judge. No, it's not. I've seen Office. That's not the guy.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[James Tupper]

But you know what I get? I was at airport security, and there was this Hispanic dude who was the guy checking your license, you know, and my license is Michael Judge. And he looks at it, he goes, you should go by Mike. And I said, it was just kind of confused. I said, what was? He goes, there's a famous guy named Mike Judge. Never mind. Like, you wouldn't know.

[Adam Carolla]

I always have this problem with security, is I made up a middle name. I don't have a middle name. And I literally made up a middle name.

[James Tupper]

Is it on your license?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, so it's on my license. So I'll pull it out of my pocket and show it to you, and I'll let you.

[James Tupper]

Wait, so what's the middle name?

[Adam Carolla]

Well, I'll dig it out of my ass. Where? Gary, where's my wallet? I feel like a tossed. I must have tossed. Oh, it's in the kitchen. It's in the kitchen. You talk like Beavis and Butthead for a second. Let me get my wallet.

[James Tupper]

Okay. Ladies and gentlemen, Adam Carola is getting his wallet. Oh, there we go. Doesn't sound much different than me talking, does it? But Adam Corolla is getting his wallet. There, that's better. Okay, so I don't have my glasses, but I think I can see this. Wait, I don't have my glasses. Is it.

[Adam Carolla]

It says Lakers. That's what I thought in the middle of it. And so I had two things happen.

[James Tupper]

Adam, Lakers, Corolla.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't know what I was doing, but I was in a DMV, you know, in 1986. Always sort of plagued by not having a middle name. It's. It's a weird thing. It's weird what you can hold against your parents. And I wouldn't hold it against them if they weren't so laissez faire about everything else in my life, career, and anything to do with me. But they're sort of. My parents are sort of like people that kind of wish they didn't have kids or like, it was like kids were pain in the ass to them. They were bad people, but they're just kind of like, ah, we don't want to pay for this and we don't want to throw. I don't want to throw a ball all around. Like, I want to hang out. And I never got a middle name. And I've always said this to my dad, my mom, like, I got the worst possible answer from my dad. I cornered him about four years ago and I said, dad, how come no middle name? Because I hear these, you know, you turn on the TV and it turns out that, you know, especially when the celebrities have their kids and, oh, congratulations to, you know, oh, phone's ring. Congratulations to Tori Spelling and her. It's probably, probably them saying, our next guest is here. Super fan. But, you know, and she gave birth to little Denny Dakota, you know, Montana, New Jersey, you know.

[James Tupper]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Albuquerque, Johnson, you know, 15 middle fucking names. And so I don't have a middle name. So I feel bad. So I said to my dad, I said, dad, what is, what's the story behind no middle name? And he was like, I don't know. I was like, what was the thinking behind it? And he's like, no, nothing. Like, I was like, please give me a story. Like, tell me a thought about it.

[James Tupper]

Something like, no, well, you know, your grandfather, father didn't have one in the. I don't know.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, that was the worst. The worst. And then I asked my mom and she gave the. She gave an even worse answer. And I said, mom, what's the no middle name story? And she said, did you ask your dad? Yeah, he doesn't have a story. His story is why you bothering me. I don't know what you're talking about. You're lucky you have a first name.

[James Tupper]

So I'm gonna change my middle name to New Jersey. By the way, what is your middle.

[Adam Carolla]

Name, by the way?

[James Tupper]

Craig.

[Adam Carolla]

Craig. That's a good solid. See, parents, they burnt a few calories, so I would stare every time I filled something out. It was first name and then be the middle box. And then it'd be. And I'd stare at that and it would make me think about how much my parents didn't love me. I would just stare at that middle box and be like, your parents. You know why I'm empty? Because they do not like you. So I just, on a whim at the dmv, I just wrote it in. And I realized that once I wrote it in, it just became, it just became the law at that point. And now when I go through airport security, the guy says, let me see your id. And he goes, lakers. And then he goes, is that really your middle name? And there's part of me that wants to go, nah, I just made it up. But then there's a part of me that thinks, oh, he's gonna pull me.

[James Tupper]

Yeah, yeah, give you a cavity search or something.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, right. I'm going to get probed if I say I just made it up because that doesn't seem like it'd be. It'd be him doing his job.

[James Tupper]

Right.

[Adam Carolla]

I like the secret mark they do with the highlighter on everyone's ticket where the guy does in the circle. I know he's not doing shit. Yeah, I know. The thing is, is somebody tells those guys, pretend you're doing something for about a four Mississippi, because that'll instill confidence.

[James Tupper]

Flying public.

[Adam Carolla]

Look at it. Uh huh. Circle this randomly draw a line and an ax. Put my mark on it. All right, there you go. But meanwhile he's. If he just said go ahead, we'd go, what the fuck is this guy doing? But because he's. There seems to be some, some rhythm to whatever he's doing. I know he's not doing right. Mike Judge is with us. As I've mentioned, the enigmatic Mike Judge. You guys like Beavis and Butthead. Let's just say you were gonna get the box set from season one or two or oh, you're gonna get the box set from King of the Hill or Office Space or Idiocracy, one of the many, many fine projects. Mike Judge has put his name on Amazon, you're gonna get it from Amazon. But you'd like to say, well, I want to support Mike Judge and I want to support this show. It's easy. Go to Amazon and instead of going straight to Amazon, go to AdamCarolla.com, click through our banner, and then we get a little love. And by the way, that whole thing that was going on in California where they were like pulling the stuff because of the state sales tax and all that kind of stuff that it's back on. So everything is back where it used to be. So all the great support you guys gave us in the past via the Amazon, it's all going to get shifted back and meaning you buy the box set for 10 bucks, we get 10 cents, and it all adds up. If you want to support the show or you're getting a Halloween outfit, you're going through Amazon, click through our website, amcroll.com and again, win, win all the way. Mike is premiering Beavis and Butthead. It's returning to MTV October 27th. And I'm. I'm. I'm guessing it'll just keep playing, right? I mean, on MTV if I know.

[James Tupper]

Yeah, yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

I mean, 24 new episodes. That is a. That's a confidence buy there, man.

[James Tupper]

That is a. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Beavis and Buttload full of episodes. And I'm working with some of his guys on my project, so hopefully, yeah. Will not be the last you hear from Mike Judge on this podcast.

[James Tupper]

That's right.

[Adam Carolla]

What else am I missing? Anything?

[James Tupper]

Mike, I think you covered it.

[Adam Carolla]

All right. Would you like to describe my hotel room as in the voice of either Hank Healer, or Beavis and or Butt Head?

[James Tupper]

Let's see here. Well, I tell you what, it smells a lot better inside than it does on the outside. Yeah, this room kicks off.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, it's kind of small.

[James Tupper]

I got nothing.

[Adam Carolla]

That's something. That's all we needed. The great Mike Judge. And until next time, this is Adam Carolla for Mike Judge saying mahalo. That was Adam.

[Giovanni]

And the great Mike Judge. That does it for today's Corolla classics. Until tomorrow.

[Allison Rosen]

And get it off, Sam.