The Downfall of the American Airport with Sam Tripoli + Female Phillies Fan Steals a Ball from Kid

Summary

The Adam Carolla Show

Episode: The Downfall of the American Airport with Sam Tripoli + Female Phillies Fan Steals a Ball from Kid
Date: September 9, 2025
Host: Adam Carolla
Guests: Sam Tripoli, Jason "Mayhem" Miller

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Episode Overview

In this high-energy, no-holds-barred episode, Adam Carolla welcomes comedian Sam Tripoli and "Mayhem" Miller to dissect the frustrations of modern air travel, government waste, and social decay—from airport nightmares and TSA absurdities to broader issues like stadium funding, the culture of entitlement, and bizarre viral moments. The episode is packed with comedic rants, cultural commentary, historical references, and some sharp debates about race, reparations, and the undermining of self-esteem in America.

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Main Discussion Points & Insights

1. Air Travel Nightmares and Airport Dysfunction

• Adam's Travel Horror Story (02:43–13:29)

  • Adam missed two shows due to a "travel odyssey from hell" — 31 hours traveling, missed connections, circling airports, weather delays, and last-minute two-hour Uber rides.
    • “You go to LAX, you can be in London or Paris in 15 hours and I’m in Talladega, Alabama.” (03:45 – Adam)
  • Florence, NC, is so empty it feels like an abandoned sitcom set; difficulty even getting an Uber out there.
  • Absurdity of lost luggage, panicked logistics, and having to perform while exhausted.

• Airline Policy Irritation

  • Adam laments illogical policies: flight crews canceling drink service for “choppiness,” then never offering drinks while sitting parked on the tarmac for an hour.
    • “If there’s ever time to get the cart, it’s now!” (44:51 – Adam)
  • Frustration at the performative “locked up” excuse for withholding service in first-class.
    • “Locked up is your ver—by that definition, would my breakfast cereal be locked up if it was just in the upper cabinet?” (49:08 – Adam)

• TSA Rants and Security Theater (21:47–31:23)

  • Detailed (and hilarious) breakdowns of invasive TSA pat-downs and the randomness of “security theater.”
    • “This guy’s nose is four and a half inches away from my asshole.” (24:07 – Adam)
  • The bowl vs. backpack battle for scanning: why, suddenly, is the bowl verboten after decades?
    • “Don’t have the fucking bowl if you don’t want anyone to use the bowl.” (29:02 – Adam)
  • Gender and cultural differences in TSA attitudes; "black women at TSA" anecdote about authority and respect.

2. Government Waste, Infrastructure and Value

• Stadium Spending vs. Rail/“Homelessness” Waste (13:43–20:26)

  • Comparison of Buffalo building a $2B stadium versus $24B spent on homelessness in LA or $15B on an unfinished rail.
    • “Buffalo’s going to build a stadium for $2 billion and we’ve spent seven times that much and have nothing.” (15:00 – Adam)
  • Sam and Adam argue that tangible, used structures are worth public investment. Intangible “feel-good” spending simply enriches consultants.

• Historical Perspective

  • The Hoover Dam—built in 5 years for $39M ($1B today)—versus California government’s expensive, slow, and useless projects.
    • “When you stand on top of Hoover Dam, you’re like, it is amazing what man can do.” (19:59 – Adam)
  • “Corruption is so bad... Progressives in California accept it as just ‘learned helplessness.’” (20:26 – Sam)

3. Cultural Decay, Fake Self-Esteem, and Corporate Pandering

• NFL’s “End Racism” & Modern Messaging (68:00–71:13)

  • Adam rails against performative activism at NFL games: “It creates this veneer of black people thinking we live in a racist society.”
    • “If I went to another country and every end zone said ‘Stop Malaria,’ I’d think there’s a bad problem with malaria.” (68:21 – Adam)
  • Sam notes: “The NFL is the least racist place—it’s all meritocracy, guys working together.”

• Commercialized “Somebody” Messaging (80:03–83:14)

  • Breakdown of a “Somebody” NFL commercial empowering kids but, Adam argues, creating entitlement.
    • “You don’t have to be respected. You have to do good.” (81:25 – Adam)
  • Dangers of the self-esteem movement and "everyone gets a trophy" culture.

• Political Code Switching and Pandering to Minorities (86:07–91:52)

  • Adam and Sam lampoon politicians' attempts to "talk black" for votes.
    • Jasmine Crockett’s code-switching and Hillary Clinton’s “I got hot sauce in my purse.”
  • Sam: “It’s inorganic. It’s so crazy.”

4. Race, Reparations, and Historical Narratives

• Reparations Skepticism (73:14–78:49)

  • Adam argues only those whose families actually owned slaves (naming Anderson Cooper, Larry David, Ben Affleck) should pay reparations.
    • “You want to give money to these people, why? They were wronged by who? Not by the Corollas.” (75:59 – Adam)
  • Sam: “It’s like if we all own a Toyota and someone in Milwaukee gets in an accident... It’s absolutely not [my responsibility].”

• Fake Activism and Class Permanence

  • Noting how “descendants of slave-owners” nearly always end up the wealthy elites in America.

5. Viral Moments and News: Phillies Ball Theft & Social Judgments

• Phillies Female Fan Steals Home Run Ball from Kid (94:40–102:21)
  • Play-by-play and analysis: Internet piles on the woman but also critiques the father for returning the ball under social pressure.
    • “The rule is, if the ball makes it to the ground, it’s anyone’s ball.” (96:10 – Adam)
    • Central lesson: being perceived as “nice” or avoiding conflict can backfire, and this is a microcosm of societal entitlement and viral shame culture.

6. Light Riffs: Velveeta Omelets, First Class “Suffering,” and More

• Adam’s first class omelet with Velveeta cheese draws a powerful, comedic riff on airline food:
  • “If you would never do it on the ground, then don’t do it in the air!” (60:10 – Adam)
• How hotels cut housekeeping after Covid “for safety,” but really for profit.
• Observations on Vegas “nickel and diming” driving normal people out: "$50 pasta bowl!"

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Corruption:
  • “If it’s not tangible, they don’t miss it.” (16:26 – Sam)
• On Security Theater:
  • “Why is the back of the hand—why is there so much more dignity in that?” (23:32 – Adam)
• On NFL Messaging:
  • “The only thing I think is it saves them money. They’re like, oh, dude, we don’t have to restock on booze… But once you wildly inconvenience everyone… should be handing out beers.” (45:19 – Adam)
• On Reparations:
  • “No one in my family owned anybody… So, why is it on me?” (75:18 – Adam)
• On Fake Self-Esteem:
  • “You’re creating little fucking monsters.” (81:42 – Adam)
• On Phillies Viral Ball Video:
  • “It’s not about the ball. It’s about her. We got a little peek behind the curtain into who this bitch is.” (100:47 – Adam)

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Segment Timestamps

• [02:43] Adam’s travel nightmare begins
• [13:43] Stadium spending vs. government boondoggles rant
• [21:47] TSA pat-down and bowl/backpack debate
• [44:51] Airline drink service policies
• [54:33] Vegas nickeling and diming, car parking hostage analogy
• [60:10] Velveeta omelet in first class riff
• [68:00] NFL performative “End Racism” signage
• [73:14] Reparations and white liberal paternalism
• [80:03] NFL “Somebody” commercial breakdown
• [94:40] Phillies fan viral ball theft—social dynamics
• [102:37] Mike Tyson/Mayweather exhibition discussion
• [106:41] Amanda Knox doing standup and commentary on media/DA priorities
• [117:24] Safety, stereotypes, and “political correctness” vs. street smarts

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Overall Tone & Style

• Candid, irreverent, highly opinionated
• Comedic but pointed social commentary
• Casual banter with running inside jokes and repeated callbacks
• Unfiltered frustrations with bureaucracy, cultural shifts, and hypocrisy

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For New Listeners

This episode offers the full Adam Carolla experience: storytelling, biting sarcasm, societal critique, and a candid—often controversial—view into what frustrates Americans about modern life. Whether you’re here for rants about airports or deeper debates about race and government, Carolla, Tripoli, and Mayhem’s unguarded takes are nothing if not thought-provoking and entertaining.

Transcript

[Adam Carolla]

Well in this episode, Sam Tripoli back in studio always brings it. Mayhem's doing the news. I got a lot of thoughts and we'll do all that right after this. Hey, this is Adam Carolla from the Adam Carolla Show. Betonline continues to be your number one source for all your football betting action. Betonline has more ways to get in and stay in on action with the latest odds, news and scores. Even live in game betting from every NFL and college game to mlb, UFC and NHL futures as well, Betonline remains your choice. For sports wagering info. Head to the website today and take advantage of their industry leading VIP program with level up bonuses and weekly cash boosts. In between games, head over to Betonline's casino with all the top Vegas style games including poker and and live casino bet online. The game starts here.

[Sam Tripoli]

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[Sam Tripoli]

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[Adam Carolla]

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[Sam Tripoli]

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[Adam Carolla]

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[Adam Carolla]

That's B O-M B-S.com and use code audio at checkout. From Corolla One Studios in Glendale, California, this is the Adam Carolla show. Adam's guest today, comedian Sam Tripoli. We got Jason Mayhem Miller on the news and now snubbed again for a vma. Adam Corolla. Yeah, get it on, got to get it on. A choice we can only mandate you get it on. Thanks for tuning in. Thanks to a friend who loved that about you. Sam Tripoli.

[Sam Tripoli]

Brother, good to see you. Thanks for having me.

[Adam Carolla]

Sam's got live shows coming up all over the place. The Comedy Store, that'll be tonight. We got Chicago Comedy bar, that'll be September 12th through the 13th. And Gigi's Cocktail Lounge, that'll be September 24th. Sam's Great Stand up comedian and rack on tour. Mayhem's in here. I got A lot of stuff to get into. Yes, you may have experienced this, but I had the on the road worst case scenario, which is delays and missing the show.

[Sam Tripoli]

Oh wow.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Sam Tripoli]

That's crazy.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. I had such an odyssey over the weekend, it was incredible. I had to write it all down to keep track of it. I missed two shows over the weekend. I'll tell you how bad my travel odyssey was over the weekend. When I showed up in North Carolina at the Comedy Zone on Saturday after missing the first show, after being diverted to another airport. After circling our airport and taking a two and a half hour Uber ride to get there just in time to do the late show, when they said, wow, sounds like a travel nightmare, I said, well it was bad, but yesterday was three times worse than this. So that's how bad Friday was. We, I kept track of it. I left my place at 7am on Friday. I walked into the hotel, the lobby of the hotel near the Talladega Super Speedway in Alabama. I walked into that lobby at midnight. I left my house at 7am and at midnight. And the whole time I was thinking, it's a two hour time difference. So let's be honest, it was a 15 hour travel day. I said, you go to LAX, you can be in London or Paris in 15 hours and I'm in Talladega, Alabama. That's why I dedicated my 15 hours. Literally once you miss your connector, man, we missed, we had a 9am flight, LAX delayed two hours, missed our connection in Dallas, then sat in Dallas till 8pm, then got, missed the gig that night, got up the next morning, went to the track, did a little glad handing, jumped in the Uber, went to the airport in. Was it Talladega, right. Birmingham. Went to the Birmingham airport. It was the funniest thing ever because after the travel day we had, we had a travel day the day before which was 15 hours and we missed everything. So Mike, who I was traveling with, Mike was paranoid the whole day, right? And he's like, we got a 2:30 flight, the show's early, the show's at 6:00', clock, the show sold out. But we're gonna land in North Carolina at 5:15 and we're going directly to the club.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

And you have an opener and we can do it. It's 20 minutes away from the club, 20 minutes from the airport. And I go, we got the whole day. Mike's checking all day. On time, on time, on time. We get onto the flight, we're gonna leave at 2:30, we're gonna land at 5:15. The pilot gets on the blower and says, we're doing great. Probably be about 55 minutes in the air. And then Mike announces, oh, we'll go by the hotel before we go to the club. We didn't have to go jinx it. We don't have to go straight to the club. We get airborne. We left on time. The flight was always on time. First show sold out, and all sudden we get over North Carolina and we're circling, gets on the thing, the weather's bad, we're gonna circle. And we' going, okay, we could circle a couple times and land. We still got 15, 20 minutes to get to the club. We have an opener. We could tell him to stretch, you know, circling, circling. And at some point he gets on the blower and he goes, we gotta divert. Oh, no, we're going to another airport. And, and, and Mike just looked at me and he's like, game over, game over. We're going to another airport. By the way, we missed the gig the night before in Alabama. So we get diverted to Florence Airport, which is somewhere.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

I'm from North Carolina, I don't even know where the hell that is.

[Adam Carolla]

It's a hell of an airport. It's not busy at all. And so now we land at 5:45 in Florence. The show's at 6, it's sold out. Mike gets on the phone with a guy and goes, tell them they'll give them their money back. There's nothing we could do. So now they go, we're gonna sit here. Now there's an 8:45 show. Yeah, that's still open. Okay, we're in Florence and we're about a 2 hour and 15 minute uber ride away from the venue.

[Sam Tripoli]

How much is that?

[Adam Carolla]

I don't know. But at this point, we can't get choosy, you know, so. So Mike and I are sitting on a crowded commercial jet in this little airport in Florence. And they don't have a Jetway or anything, but they push the ladder with wheels up to it like a Home Depot, you know, and they just push it up to the side of the plane. And we're sitting there and they go, look, we're gonna refuel. We gotta get a refueling paperwork done, but we're gonna refuel here. And then it's about 20 minutes to get to Charlotte, but we don't know what place we're in. In line, and we're not sure if the weather's blown out. We're gonna have to circle, but we're feeling pretty good about refueling here. Then taking off for there. And Mike just goes, we can't chance it, we can't chance that. So I go, what do you want to do? Well, we got to order an Uber and take a two and a half hour Uber ride, like side streets through North Carolina. So they just go, there's any, you know, we'll hang out, we'll refuel, probably be on the ground. They're on the ground for like an hour. We don't have our luggage. Our luggage is on the plane, right? It's in the belly of the plane. We checked it. So me and Mike just stand up. We're the only two people on the plane. We stand up, we go, we gotta get off this flight. And I don't think anyone knows why we have to get off the flight. Cause it didn't make sense.

[Sam Tripoli]

That would creep me out.

[Adam Carolla]

We were the only human beings who got up because who. Everyone else is going to North Carolina and is going to. Where did I. Charlotte. Charlotte. Everyone's going to Charlotte. Everyone's going to Charlotte. So why are they taking a two and a half hour?

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

I would have thought, why are the air rangers getting off the plane?

[Adam Carolla]

Right? So we get up, we grab our backpacks and we, we go, we gotta leave. And they go, okay, you walk off. You can't get back on though. I go, I know we're not. And we just went to this airport that was empty. It was like the airport from Wings, that sitcom. And it's just.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Oh, I remember Florence was actually where Deliverance was filmed.

[Adam Carolla]

So you got off east there, had banjos dueling. It was a completely empty airport. There's this one middle aged black guy just kept looking at us and looking at us. And finally I said, what do you do? And he goes, I do luggage. And I go, okay, well, you're like the Maytag repairman. Like you just sit all day, there's nothing going on. Yeah, there's nothing open. What a great gig. Nothing. I know. And we just sit there. And he's now tasked with finding someone who will drive us from Florence to Charlotte and to the club.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

But two and a half hours. This story sounds weird because when you're out in the boondocks, getting an Uber ain't so easy. It's not like they're waiting for like in Branson, Missouri. I missed the flight because now no Uber. Oh yeah, we'll be there tomorrow at 7:00am yeah, right.

[Adam Carolla]

Anyway, yeah, so now we might on the plane, Mike goes, okay, I got someone picking us up in 10 minutes. I go, okay, we get off the flight because we're doing the math. We'll still get to the club before the late show, but we gotta leave now. And we can't take any chances on the variables with the flight. Cause I don't know what's going on with the weather. So we get off and then we get to the. We get to the airport lobby and then Mike goes, oh, she dropped out. So now we're in the stick. So he's gotta find someone who's going. Because that person is gonna drive us into Charlotte. They're not even coming back that night. They're gonna stay in Charlotte, you know, so you gotta find a motivated marine. Found a woman of color with upper arms the size of Earl Campbell's thighs. Like, I didn't know upper arms. I'm talking, you know, that upper army, you know, bingo witch. You tell her she's fat. You tell her.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah, I'm not doing bingo wings.

[Adam Carolla]

But you know, the upper arm of a like Nate Newton type upper arm. Only women, only black women can get that kind of upper arm.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

Like Mama June and stuff. They get this flabby sort of back arm, but just that arm.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah, I know.

[Adam Carolla]

And by the way, wearing something that accentuates it, which is weird.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah. But when you live in the hicks, you don't care how you look.

[Adam Carolla]

I guess. I guess. So we jump in, she's perfectly nice. She's going the fucking speed limit the whole way. You know, she's a little scared of driving. Tells us she didn't like driving in the city.

[Sam Tripoli]

Then she becomes an Uber driver.

[Adam Carolla]

Right? So we hop in, she drives. We literally just drop us off in the back of the club. There's someone like waiting for us there. I don't have any clothes or anything. It's all on the plane. And we just go do the late show. And they reschedule the early show for a matinee for the next day.

[Sam Tripoli]

Okay, that works out.

[Adam Carolla]

It works out. Except for it is the kickoff of the NFL season and the matinee is 3pm like literally right in the middle of the football day east coast time. That's. That's when they. I didn't want to be there. I was staring at my phone the whole time checking the NFL. So I got a million thoughts and I'm going to bounce it off you, Sam. Think about this. When I where I was watching the late game on the plane coming home, got a 9 o' clock flight out Sunday night. So I basically, first off, I tallied up my travel I did 31 hours worth of travel over the weekend. 31 hours of travel over the weekend. That's the time I was in an Uber or in an airport or on a plane.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Day and a third, a pilgrimage to Mecca.

[Adam Carolla]

I'd rather be in the fucking Donner party than what I had to go through. So here's the thing. I was watching the late game, the Buffalo game. Crazy great game. And they.

[Sam Tripoli]

Crazy great game.

[Adam Carolla]

They mentioned that Buffalo is building a new stadium, right? Their stadium's, like, 55 years old. They're building a new stadium, and they go to the tune of $2 billion. And I'm like, wow, that's a lot of money, but that's going to be a nice stadium. And then I realized, I looked it up. We've already spent 15 billion on our train for nothing. And here's all I'm saying in general, you know, like, in life, like, I don't mind spending money, but if you spend money on something you use and you utilize and it has utility, you know, and you keep it for a while, whatever. Like Sofi Stadium. I looked it up again. 5.5 billion. That's a lot. But it's busy every weekend.

[Sam Tripoli]

And you got something. There is something.

[Adam Carolla]

There's something there. The Rams are playing one week. The Chargers are playing next. Next week. Julio Glacias is coming in the weekend before the Taylor Swift is sold out. It's a thing. It exists. People use it. It, like, creates jobs and revenue. There's people paying. You charge people 100 bucks to park on your lawn in Englewood, in that neighborhood. Like, there's billions of dollars being just shed, thrown off.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

The Bills are playing in Merced.

[Adam Carolla]

The Bills are playing in Merced or Fresno. And you go, okay, we've spent three times as much on a stretch of railroad that's not done with no railway carts, no bullet train, no nothing from two places that nobody. People don't want to get to one place or another. They don't even want to be in one of those places. It's like, which prison do you want to be housed in? I don't know. How about no prison? But I just realized Buffalo's going to build a stadium for 2 billion, and we've spent seven times that much, and we have nothing. And then I realized, oh, wait a minute. We spent 24 billion on homelessness out here, and we got nothing. Don't get me wrong. I don't mind the money. If the money was a monorail that was going to pick me up and take Me or we got extra. We've gotten rid of graffiti, and we've gotten rid of gangs. Like, if it's something, we built a bunch of schools or helipads or something, we get nothing. And all that money. Then I realized, like, everyone always freaks out over a stadium. You know, like, 2 billion. The last stadium is 55 years old. There's a fucking concert there every weekend. There's an NFL game, that the Olympics are coming to town. They're gonna use Sofi. Like, shut it the fuck off. That's the best use of our money ever. Right? Or we can do it your way. We'll spend it on homeless, and the money will go to your friends who have a homeless foundation called.

[Sam Tripoli]

If it's not tangible, they don't miss it. Right? But if you told a city, oh, we can't build a stadium here because you don't want to pay for it, we're going to move the team. People would freak out if you go, oh, we spend all this money on homelessness. It's not really tangible. You know what I'm saying? It's like there's nothing for them to hold or touch or feel that they would lose their minds on. Same thing with the high rail, because no one's ever experienced a high rail. They don't know what they're missing out, which is $15 billion.

[Adam Carolla]

I know. It's like, you think about. You go, like, all right, I'm gonna spend $41,000 to refurbish my bathroom. I'm gonna rebuild my bathroom. $41,000. Yeah, but you use it every single day for the rest of your life. Like, so what? I don't care. By the way, the contractor could screw you and gouge you for an extra 10, and it could go from 41 to 51. But you still use it three times a day every day for the rest of your life. So who cares? Versus this homeless thing or the rail or whatever that thing is. And then I got really angry, which is I was working on a joke. And I don't know about you, Sam Tripoli, but I like to research my jokes so I'm accurate with my numbers and my dates and my times.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah, I do think it's important. Like, you know, my stories are all from real stories. I'm not one of these people that can make it up. So I like to be accurate. And it's funny when I watch people who say a joke and I know the data is incorrect, it kind of, like, rings hollow with me, you know? And so, yeah, I'M the same way too. I want everything to be factually correct. Yeah. Might not agree with the fact and then you don't like the joke. But I do like it to be factually correct. I. I don't do the research on it because I base it on. Yeah, I guess I do do research on it, so through my podcast and stuff like that. But I'm very much in factually correct material.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. So I'm trying to do this joke which is organic. Somebody tweeted it to me. I've said it before. But I went to the Hoover Dam. I saw that it took five years to make the Hoover Dam. And I just took a picture and I posted it. Five years. And it's amazing. And I said, five years to make the Hoover Dam. That's all it took. And by the way, it started in 31. It's not like we had modern day, you know, equipment and stuff. And so somebody tweeted back, imagine if that was Gavin Newsom's California.

[Sam Tripoli]

Oh, my God.

[Adam Carolla]

And you were trying to build the Golden Gate Bridge. How long would it take with Gavin Newsom to build the Golden Gate Bridge? And then I wrote back, people would die of natural causes waiting to commit suicide.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah. Yeah. So people who were born after it started would die of natural causes.

[Adam Carolla]

They were planning on jumping off that bridge because they're in a loveless relationship, struggling with their sexuality, but eventually cancer, prostate blows up. They never got a chance to kill themselves with that. So I saw, I was like researching the Hoover Dam. And the Hoover Dam was five years. And the Hoover Dam cost at the time $39 million, which is. That's a medium sized private jet now. Right.

[Sam Tripoli]

That's like a scoring forward off the bench from the NBA.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. That is 1800 square feet in Malibu off PCH.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

All right. It's 39. But they said, adjusted for inflation, that's between 750 million and 1 billion. But I still was like 1 billion. We just did 14 on a train. That doesn't go anywhere. That doesn't work. You did the Hoover Dam for one bill. When you stand on top of the Hoover Dam, you're like, it is amazing what man can do 100%.

[Sam Tripoli]

So the corruption is so bad.

[Adam Carolla]

Gotta be right.

[Sam Tripoli]

And it's just like there's something about California in particular. Progressives, they have what they call learned helplessness. They've basically been traumatized so much that they just have accepted that's corruption. And now you see all these polls between two awful candidates. I'm not a JD Vance fan at all in any. I. I wonder what he had to give up to be the be Peter Thiel's boy, you know what I'm saying? Like, what did you sacrifice to get that position? Yes. I'm talking about butt stuff. But the whole thing is this is like. There's these polls coming out, and it's like they're. Polls are all propaganda to manipulate your energy and your perception. And they're like, polls show Gavin Newsom's leading in the polls. Nobody likes Gavin Newsom. His whole family doesn't like him. No. His own wife went to the other party. That's how much they despise Gavin Newsom. These are all energy manipulation stuff. And it's the best example how you should never believe any poll. Polls are just full of shit.

[Adam Carolla]

I had another. I had a few firsts. I'm an old guy who's been Traveling nonstop for 30 years. 35 years. Pretty much. Pretty much nonstop for 35 years. And I had two firsts.

[Sam Tripoli]

Oh, wow.

[Adam Carolla]

I got diverted. I've never been diverted before. First we circled for a good. It's the weirdest thing where you're looking at your watch and you're going, the show's at 6. The show sold out. Got an opener. Start at 6:05. You can do 20 minutes and get there at 6. 25 or 15 minutes from the airport. I'm not getting my bags. I just have to run. Find an Uber. It's 5:17. But we're circling. We're not landing. If we were landing, I could do it. But we're gonna circle. And I'm like, But any second we could start our approach. But then the worst news ever, which is were diverting. I never diverted. And I got the cock and ball pat down on the way out of LAX and on the way back. How do you get it every time? Well, you're hot. Mike took pictures. We'll put it [e-mail]. i was first off this thing.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

The smiling one. We could have just done with that one.

[Sam Tripoli]

I'm getting molested.

[Adam Carolla]

I love it, by the way I'm smiling because at that point, I think we're gonna get to Talladega and do the gig that night. So I'm still.

[Sam Tripoli]

I feel a lot of pre check.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah, I have that. We had a clear and pre check and they did this weird one. I wear a baseball hat. Sometimes I take the baseball hat off just to show them when I'm walking through, and then they do this inexplicable Put the hat back on and come through again. It's just like, really? What are we.

[Sam Tripoli]

What are we doing here?

[Adam Carolla]

What are we doing here? I gotta the rando pat down. So it wasn't anything I had on me.

[Sam Tripoli]

Went off when you walked through, like, random check. And it's always happening to you.

[Adam Carolla]

Beep. Went off. The poor guy's got explained. He has to use the back of his hand and he's hitting the nut sack. He's getting down. He's doing the back. First off. First things first. Why is the back of the hand. Why is there so much more dignity in that? Like, last I checked, that was Ike Turner's move. Yeah, he liked the backhand. It's not like everyone goes, oh, Tina, quit complaining. Not like he got you with the front part of his hand.

[Sam Tripoli]

I guess this is groping. This is just checking you out, I guess. I guess they assume this is like copying a feel.

[Adam Carolla]

Which is so they gotta get down. This guy's nose is four and a half inches away from my asshole. And he's gotta slide his hands up my thigh, crack into it, sandwich like a toaster, you know, like bread and a toaster. In between the nut sack and the inner thigh, they're having you cough.

[Sam Tripoli]

Cough.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. I think it's a lawyer thing. Because there's no way they can.

[Sam Tripoli]

They can, but the whole thing is.

[Adam Carolla]

Like, you grab with the back of your hand.

[Sam Tripoli]

If you're doing this, you're enjoying it. This is work.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. I can't grope a woman with the back of my hand and then claim. Come on, man. You know I have low sensitivity in the back of my hand. Yeah. I'm just doing backhand, brush, titty. Yeah. Yeah. I turn her, saying as, I just backhanded the bitch. Not like I hit her.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, so that's on the way out. Full, full crack and ass, back, sack, backhand, nut, cock feel, which I don't care about. To me, it's the weird. What the fuck are we doing? As a civilization at my age, I'm.

[Sam Tripoli]

Happy anyone wants to touch me.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

I just don't like that he's on his knees having this conversation with me. Okay, I'm gonna touch the back.

[Sam Tripoli]

Okay. Don't do that, dude. I don't care. Get in there.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah, that's what I said.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Then after that, obviously, I had to see if he could break a 20. Cause I wasn't gonna give him a full 20 tip. And then he had a change belt, thankfully, so he pulled that out. I was able to break that, I gave him 10. And then Mike and I went on our way. And then when I was leaving out of Charlotte on Sunday night, I got to pull out full crack feel once again. I got the first off, 31 hours of travel and two nut trauma situations and like 45 hours, they're just me too.

[Sam Tripoli]

And you, dude.

[Adam Carolla]

I know. I'll show you the picture. We'll show the picture. It's a different outfit. One happened on a Friday, the other happened on a Sunday. And I'm wearing the different outfit picture that you showed me, Andrew, before the show.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Adam, I want you to know you're brave for sharing your story.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah, I support all victims.

[Adam Carolla]

They ask if you want to go somewhere else. Yeah, but I'm like, that makes a lot of weirder. Yeah, no cameras, no supervisors. Never let them take off.

[Sam Tripoli]

Let's go to a hotel that allows you to do one hour rentals.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, sorry. I assume we had some multiple pictures which I looked at before this, but yeah, you can see different outfit. New dude right here.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

He's expressing your anal glands.

[Adam Carolla]

New dude down once again. This time he thought I had something in my back pocket. I don't have anything in my back pocket. Let me tell you something. You know what, I have jokes. I bought a belt called a travel belt.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

It's a nylon belt with a plastic hasp.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

The buckle is plastic.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

So you don't set off anything because it's called a travel belt. It's cool. It's super lightweight. I used to travel with the leather belt with the thing, you know, the metal. Get a. They're 20 bucks. Get one. They're plastic, they're super light. Hold your pants up. It's great for travel. And that's what I travel with. And they said, well, yeah, but the belt. And I said, but it's non metallic. And I go, well, it's still something, so take it out.

[Sam Tripoli]

It's something.

[Adam Carolla]

I've traveled the entire country with this belt 10,000 times. No one's ever said a word. Leaving Charlotte at 8 o' clock at night to pull you out. Let me tell you. Let me tell you something that Mike does and he gets himself into trouble. I don't know if you guys do this lax. Charlotte was this way too. Certain airports have a lot of middle aged black women working TSA or lesbians or both. Yeah, right. They got a big problem with you not listening to them. That's a 100%. The dudes, dudes. When a dude has a shitty job, he's usually just broken, you know what I mean? Like it's a kind of a. Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, go ahead, whatever thing. The women, it's a personal affront when you don't listen to them. Cause there's a weird dad issue. And then also with the black women, these are all Democrat, you know, they vote 90% Democrat. They buy all the bullshit of systemic racism and the white man's world and all the whores of the white man. So middle aged white guy, not listening to them. We're back. It's Jim Crow in the south, right? So what happens every time is for some reason they get obsessed with you putting all your shit in your backpack. Put the phone, put the glat, put it all in the backpack. But they have those bowls out, right? Mike does never want to put his shit in the backpack. And I agree because once it goes in, I have trouble finding him. I like the bowl.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

So they stand there and they go, all of your keys, all your glasses, all possessions, wallets, phone, earbuds, put it in the backpack. Put it all in the backpack. It'll be in the backpack. You'll know it'll be in the backpack. And then as she's saying it, Mike's reaching for the bowl and then she's leaning because he is defying her. It's not that he's using the bowl, he's defying her. That's what's happening now in Mike's defense. Don't have the fucking bowl. If you don't want anyone to use the bowl, why is there a pile? And why in the last 10 minutes did you become obsessed with not using the ball? But you have the ball? Because the ball. Always use the ball. Yeah, always your butt. 30 years of using the bowl. Now no bowl, use your backpack. But we'll leave the bowls out.

[Sam Tripoli]

And I can understand if you're like, put it in the backpack. So you don't leave without the bowl. But if someone puts in the bowl, you're like, hey, I hope you remember, it's on you. I don't understand why it's that big of a talking point for them.

[Adam Carolla]

The talking point is they want this thing. And instead of you not caring, it's really. The reality is a sort of apathy. Like it's. Look, it's just another person at the airport shouting something out that I'm tuning out because I don't fucking care. It's black white noise. But yeah, I don't want to hear it. All containers, all, all liquids, all, everything out of the Pockets. You're like, yeah, can we just get fucking through this so I can get to the other side? You know what I mean? So we're tuning out to them. It's like an affront, like you're ignoring them. Also, women don't work well with the I'm not listening to you part. They internalize it. Whereas if I work, I used to teach comedy, traffic, school, blah, blah, blah. I don't give a fuck that. Came in late, came in early, left early, whatever. Just sit down. Like, I wasn't. It wasn't like a personal thing for me. It was like, this is a shit job. You don't want to be here. I don't want to be here. We'll make the best of this. I'll sign your certificate, we'll go home. That was. It wasn't like a personal. You know, like when people have shitty, stupid jobs but then internalize them and get really weird on them. I don't get that. It's a shit job.

[Sam Tripoli]

Women are interesting because, like, when they become managers, they think they gotta be real hard asses. Cause they don't think men respect them. And maybe there was a time when women came into the workforce and it was like that. But we've had that for decades now. Men are used to it. If you're a female manager, men don't care if the manager is a man or a woman. They just want to do their job and have an easy time at work. The more you bust their balls, the more they're irritated. And then it becomes something. You don't have to be a hard ass to get their respect. They just want to do their job and get it over with.

[Adam Carolla]

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[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, so Mike, because Mike tunes everyone out, doesn't know and doesn't care. He always is reaching for the bowl and he's putting all his shit in the bowl. And then I'm getting tension now because I see her, she's walking up on Mike, sir, the backpack. And Mike started not really listening and pouring everything in the bowl. And then she's getting into a worst case scenario. Those glasses fall out of that bowl, they'll come crying to me. And she's turning it into like a personal thing. Oh, my God, we just went through this with COVID Masks, sir. Matt, Mike, whatever.

[Sam Tripoli]

What if. What, like women love. Yeah, that's half a TikTok. Women fantasizing about things that haven't happened or probably won't happen.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, probably not. But I have realized certain airports get militant with the lack of bolus screaming at you to put everything in your backpack and somehow are off the bowl. Even though we've been on the bowl for 40 years. But again, the mixed message of leaving the bowl around, it's basically like saying to your kid, like, look, honey, put on a couple of pounds. I worry about early onset diabetes, so could you really try to get a little more exercise and eat a little healthier? But I'm just gonna put these donuts out on the table. But look at you. Just please stay away. Stay away. I would say, well, you're a bad parent because you shouldn't put the fucking donuts out. Don't put them out there. Oh, it's a big stack of bowls right where Mike can see them. And Mike loves that bowl.

[Sam Tripoli]

That's the original sin. God was like, don't eat of that apple.

[Adam Carolla]

Don't eat it off the bowl. Do not fill it. The bowl. That's a bowl of sin. Next thing you know, that's a bowl of temptation. And Mike can't stop biting at the bowl. He sees that bowl like a dog sees dinner in that bowl. And he just starts going for it because it's always stacked on top of the opening of the thing. And I heard that woman, I can see her. She's pissed. She's an asshole. She's been yelling at everyone to put shit in their bag for the last four hours. No one's listening to her.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

So what does Medea say to Mike?

[Adam Carolla]

Madea comes up and starts talking over Mike's shoulder. Mike has a great ability to tune out almost everyone all the time. And so he's just moving with his. He's moving forward with piling shit into the bowl while she's standing over his shoulder yelling at him about his backpack. And he's just sort of moving. And she doesn't have any real dominion over him because the bull's not illegal. It's a suggestion. The suggestion is, listen to me. Use your backpack. Mike's like, I'm not listening to you. I like the bull. Now, part of the bull is when the bowl started, what year did the security bowl begin? Because here's what happened with the bull. The bowl began before people had cell phones. Yeah, it pre. It's pre cell phone bull. Then they had a cell phone. They had a flip phone, which fits nicely into a bull. Now we got the iPhone 17. It's a fucking brick. It doesn't fit into the bowl.

[Sam Tripoli]

Right.

[Adam Carolla]

It hangs out the bowl. And then you put that in there, and that's a ramp for the keys and sunglasses to escape the bowl.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah, it's like the thing goes through.

[Adam Carolla]

It's a break. That's a prison break.

[Sam Tripoli]

It's a bowl break. It's an underground railroad.

[Adam Carolla]

The sunglasses blasted. Like, come on, keys, let's do it. Yeah, come on. Underground rail. It's a ramp, and they use it like evil knievel. Over Snake River Canyon, they go, let's get out of here.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah, let's go.

[Adam Carolla]

Let's make a break over the. Oh, over darkness. Once we get into that thing, it's going to go black.

[Sam Tripoli]

A lot happens in there.

[Adam Carolla]

We can make our move. Yeah, the wallet. The wallet's always been steady with the bowl because the wallet's like the good prisoners. Like, I'm not doing. I'm staying here, guys. I'm staying here. I'm the warden's side accountant. It's like a pig. I'm not going anywhere.

[Sam Tripoli]

Wherever you leave the rock, you come back two hours later. There the rock is.

[Adam Carolla]

After nine. Eleven is when the bowl got popular. So it's been a while. I would argue when the bowl started, what percentage of Americans traveled with a phone when the bull started?

[Sam Tripoli]

Well, isn't that the big thing? How did they make calls on the plane? Like, did we have that Technology at that moment. So people did have some sort of phones. I remember.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah.

[Sam Tripoli]

Where I was working in 9 on 9 11, I was valleying at a hotel and the guy told me, he's like, we were attacked. And I'm like, what is happening? So I think we did have cell phones, but they were obviously.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah, it was a flip phone.

[Adam Carolla]

It's very weird.

[Sam Tripoli]

The cell phone got huge. Yeah. Remember it was like, hey, dude.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, Wall Street.

[Sam Tripoli]

Then it got super small where it was flip phones.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. The flip phone fits nicely with the bowl because it's rounded on the edges and the bowl's round. The brick, that square iPhone doesn't sit right with the bowl. It's funny because you're right. On 9 11, people were calling, you know, saying, I love you, honey. You know, tell the kids I love them. Meanwhile, it's 20, 25. Mike and I are circling the airport in Charlotte and I'm like, you gotta tell the club owner we're not gonna make the early show. And he's like, I can't get any reception. Oh, really? Yeah. Well, that's the other thing is we couldn't communicate.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Because the flight was on time.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

If the flight is delayed two hours and you'll call him from the airport and go, hey, man, you gotta scrub that early show. But we got on the plane and took off thinking, all right, flight on, we're on time. It's a short flight. It's an hour flight. It's like saying, if you're flying from Burbank to San Francisco and it's like an hour flight and the flight left at 3pm and you guys left at 3pm, what would be the percentage of you missing the gig? Like, well, the plane would have to crash, but other than that, we're landing. Like, we're there, we left on time. No, we had to circle and we're.

[Sam Tripoli]

So they probably turned off the WI fi for no reason at all. Why would you have to. If anything, you're like, hey, dude, we're circling, but we're going. Leave the WI fi on. Everyone could use it.

[Adam Carolla]

Here's a weird. Okay, here's a policy that I can't explain. And maybe you guys can help, which is. They go, we got a 55 minute flight. You know, it's always that 55 minutes in the air thing. And we go. Mike goes, oh, man, that's good. We're gonna be there early. And I'm like, I don't know. Cause they always do the 55 in the air and then they Land early. And they go, all the gates are taken. Cause we got here 20 minutes. So we'll just sit here for 20 until one of the gates clear. So there's no early. There's just faster flying and then long sitting. But let me ask this. And it does this with all the people I know who get grounded. And by the way, I think Mike. I said to Mike, when we landed, when we were diverted, Mike's like, we got to get off this plane. I was like, I don't know if they're going to let us off this plane. I don't know how we get off this plane. And there was that big court thing, I think a few years ago where now they have to let you off the plane. Because they weren't. I didn't think they were going to let us. Anyway. Anyway, let me ask. Here's a weird policy. It's a one hour flight. And at some point they start pushing the cart down the thing for the drink service. But it gets a little choppy because that's the problem. We're going into the weather. And so the pilot does the. I've told everyone to sit down and put their seatbelt on. And we were going to cancel the drink service.

[Sam Tripoli]

Unbelievable.

[Adam Carolla]

They do it every time. There's no such thing as Burbank to Vegas without getting. It's a little bit choppy coming in. We're gonna cancel. Okay, fine. Some ruse. I don't wanna do the drink service. Fine. So they cancel the drink service. Right. But then you circle the airport for 40 minutes. Yeah. And then you divert and you land. And now you're on the ground. So the reason we never did get. I never got my Miller lights because it was too choppy. But now we're on the ground and we're doing nothing. I'm just staring at a tanker truck next to us. And that guy's waiting for his paperwork. He can't even fill us up. We're just waiting for the paperwork to come through. So you diverted everybody. You fucked everyone's weekend up. You added three hours to everyone's travel day and everything else. And now we're gonna sit on the ground for over an hour. Hey, bitch, get the cart. If there's ever time to get the cart, it's now. There's nothing. The engines aren't running. We are doing nothing. We have to refuel. There's nothing. We missed the drink. We missed the cart in the air. Cause it was bumpy. Now we're sitting on the ground and it's like. And you got a bunch of unhappy campers. Shouldn't you just be handing out beers and mini vodka? Travelers, like, at that point, Free drinkers, they never do it. They never do it. They just sit there. They go, well, we're gonna wait a while. And I'm in contact with that. The best piece of goodwill you could get at that point is if the chick stood up and went, it's gonna be on us.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah, liquor, everybody.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm pushing his cart. Go ahead. And by the way, is there some danger in her serving people while we're sitting on the ground? Now, the reality is, I don't know, they don't want people to have to use the bathroom or the cans. I don't know what they want, but they don't want to give you a drink. But what would be their explanation for no drink? We already had a drink, but you canceled it. And now we're on the ground and no one's going anywhere. And this thing's gonna last three hours longer than it should have of where's our fucking drink?

[Sam Tripoli]

The only thing I think is it saves them money. They're like, oh, dude, we don't have to restock on booze. We can just use it on the next flight.

[Adam Carolla]

I get that's what they want. But once you wildly inconvenience everyone and you already canceled the drink stuff because the plane was moving too much, and now we're sitting, not moving at all, and all we're doing is sitting like there is nothing to do but wait for paperwork to come in from corporate because we need a new itinerary and the guy can't even fuel our plane unless the paperwork comes through. All we're doing is that we're just sitting here and 20ft ahead of us is a fridge full of booze.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah, can we just get a little lap dances? Can we get some lap dances here? Working. Everything, all precaution. Precautionary rules are all. Again, fantasizing about things that never that hasn't happened. Like the notion that if I bring booze, maybe the plane rocks. I fall, I break my neck. I'm paralyzed. It makes no sense. It makes no sense at all.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, look, I will say this. If it's extremely choppy and you don't want people to get up, fine. It's very choppy. They could fall over, hit their head or something. Fine. But sitting on the ground without the engines running is the opposite of choppy. And these. If anybody needs a fucking beer, it's this group. Yeah, it's this group. That's been circling and diverted and plans off for them.

[Sam Tripoli]

Maybe they don't want everyone to get drunk. And then he got a roadhouse going on in the middle.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

That's what it is. They don't want some air ragers, you.

[Sam Tripoli]

Know what I mean? They're like, okay, I've had a couple shots. Let me tell you how I feel. Okay.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

I was thinking Corolla would rush the cockpit.

[Adam Carolla]

Like 9 11, let's roll, let's roll. But I just grab a beer and run back. That's what I would have done during 9 11. I go, all right, let's roll. Once we got our beer, we'd be right back in our seats. You're a regular carry on, or however you say that in Arabic. So the other booze related thing I was thinking of, it's kind of funny. I hate, I hate it when they lie to you. I don't mind someone going, we're not going to do this, or whatever, but we were flying in, had a first class seat. Flying into Dallas. I got the trip tracker on my screen. I like to watch my plane. Yeah.

[Sam Tripoli]

It gets close.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm like, satisfying. It's also your plane so big. It's the size of Arizona when it's flying. Like, no way it's that big. Come on now, that's fake. But you're flying over and you go, oh, that's where Guadalajara is, you know, like. And all this stuff. I like it. I may be a caveman, but I, I like seeing where we're going.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

You want to trip out, turn your Google Maps on as you're landing in LA and get the thing. That blue dot is flying. It's real fun.

[Adam Carolla]

I like it. So I'm looking at it and I see there's 40 minutes left in the flight. And I'm sitting in first class. And I know we got a long day because I know we missed our connection and we're not going anywhere. We got nothing to do. So I look at the clock as 40 minutes. I go, I'm going to order a drink. And so I'm sitting there in first class. I order a drink. She comes by and I go, well, I'm gonna order a drink for land. She goes, we're gonna land in 20 minutes. So I think we'll suspend the drinks. And I'm looking at the flight Tracker. It's like 40 minutes. You know, I get where you're going, ma', am, but I got an LED strip, right?

[Sam Tripoli]

The robot say you're lying.

[Adam Carolla]

The robot says, you're lying, you know, And I go, well, you know, first class, 40 minutes. I can drink pretty good, you know, just give me a glass of white wine. And then she goes, the wine's all locked up. Like, locked up. Like it's fucking Utah on a Sunday.

[Sam Tripoli]

Plate of alcoholics.

[Adam Carolla]

Locked up is your ver. By that definition. Would my breakfast cereal be locked up if it was just in the upper cabinet? Like, sorry, no breakfast for you today, Carolla. It's all up there.

[Sam Tripoli]

What is this, Fort Knox? It's locked up.

[Adam Carolla]

It's not locked up. It's in a fucking cabinet. You put it away.

[Sam Tripoli]

You got the keys. Unlock it.

[Adam Carolla]

There is no keys. There's a lock. Yeah. It's like saying, well, we can't go swimming today. Cause the pool, the gate, it's all locked up. It's all locked up. It's like, no, you can just go there, flip the task, grab the thing. Now it's all locked up. I would prefer they just go, fuck, yeah. I don't want to do my job.

[Sam Tripoli]

I can't believe they tell you that in first class. That's how you guys get away with everything.

[Adam Carolla]

They're there for your safety. See, the new world orders, they hit real hard where they go. Our flight crew is here predominantly for your safety. Safety is java. So once you hide behind the veneer of safety, that's why we all just got butt fucked by Covid. It's like, safety, safety, safety. Once you do safety, then you can do whatever you want after safety. So she's not a cocktail waitress. She's a paramedic who's here for my safety. And you wouldn't tell a paramedic to get you a drink, would you? So they're here for it, primarily for your safety. And that's when they switched over freedom fighters. Yes, that's right. So it's locked up.

[Sam Tripoli]

They just think you're stupid.

[Adam Carolla]

They don't really. I've realized when people give you answers, they don't. They don't even care.

[Sam Tripoli]

Well, it's also that they. It's. It's almost talking to you. The same way your mom used to talk to you.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[Sam Tripoli]

When your mom just didn't want you to do it. So she'd be like, why can't I do it? Because I told you. And that's like. It's not really an answer, but for.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Some reason softer than that, it's like using like. Like disguising language.

[Adam Carolla]

You know, it's locked up.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Cause most people wouldn't be hyper vigilant and go, locked up, huh? I'm gonna write a bit about this. They're just gonna go, okay, ma'.

[Sam Tripoli]

Am.

[Adam Carolla]

The other. Well, the thing that's funny about it. And then I'm gonna ask Sam about his mom, see what kind of sandwich mom he had. It's like, I did this once. It was like, right after Covid, I was flying first class. And I go, give me vodka and soda water with lemon in it. And they go, mm, we don't have lemon in first class. And I go, all right, well, do lime? They go, yeah, we don't have lime. It's always a mystery to them. They go, they didn't give us any lime. Like, what they get, what they don't get. Like, they didn't give a fucking. Tell them to put lime. It's a first class. People are ordering drinks. People want. Yeah, they want lemon or they want lime. So. So she goes, we don't have any lemon. We don't have any lime. I go, I don't get it. Why not? It's first class. There's always lemon and lime. They go, Covid. And I go. I said to her, at least she was honest. I go, what does lemon and lime have to do with COVID And she goes, I don't know. It's basically saying it's locked up. Like, it's not locked up. It's just, shut the fuck up. Leave me alone. Just leave me alone.

[Sam Tripoli]

It's like hotels. In a hotel, you used to get your room, room cleaned every day. And then Covid came to, like, oh, we can cut down on our whole. Our housekeeping staff by only doing it when you leave. And if you need new towels and you ask for it.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Yeah. Share your towels with the room next to you.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. But the good news is you will get your TV remote in a condom.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

And you can feel good about yourself. Yeah, yeah.

[Sam Tripoli]

There's no germs or anything. Yeah, it's. It's. It's very weird. It's the nerfing of society, but it's also scumbags who are, like, forever southwest. You didn't have to pay for bags. Now it's like they're just like some banker terminators. Like, we could make more money off this microtransaction. Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, can you guys agree on this? I realized I had this happen back to back. I went to Vegas, and I checked in to the hotel. I drove around and I parked. I didn't valet. I just used the parking lot where you pull the ticket Right. And I pulled in on a Friday at 3:50, 3:50 in the afternoon. And the following day I left. And it was 3:59 the following day. And when I punched a ticket in, it said $46. And I said, oh, I thought it was 23 bucks a day. And the answer is, it is 23 bucks a day. You went nine minutes into the next day.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yep.

[Sam Tripoli]

Unbelievable.

[Adam Carolla]

Right? And having everyone. I just had that with lax. I just had it with Burbank where like, Mike and I flew out at 10:30 in the morning, came back the next day at noon. Two days. Two days. And then I realized, oh, yeah, back in the day when I'd get my motorcycle towed, I got my motorcycle towed at like 10 at night. And I went there at like 7am when they opened. It's like two days storage. I'm like, two days, we're at nine hours. It towed in on a Thursday, now it's Friday. And I realized they fuck your shit up with that all the time. Mike got it when he got something towed once. They did that same two day thing. Here's what I'm saying. This is clearly illegal. Right? I mean, they go a day, you get.

[Sam Tripoli]

It's immoral. I don't know.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, but now. But here's what I'm. Here's the reality. You guys ready? Here's what I've realized. Yes, I had my car in the Vegas parking lot for 24 hours and nine minutes.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yes.

[Adam Carolla]

And it was a two day. I paid for the entire day.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay. And it happens every time you go to LAX or any parking thing, it just rolls and. Or they have some weird stilted thing where it's like 80% of the next days in the first 15 minutes. And then after that, like, they front load it. They know they're gonna fucking. It is Ralph Nader would never stop throwing up. If I explain this stuff.

[Sam Tripoli]

Like, this is a lot.

[Adam Carolla]

Once in a while there's things in consumers where they go, oh, that, that gift certificate expired. And they would tell you that all the time. Like somebody bought you a $200 gift certificate and then a year later they go, that expired. And they're like, well, that's illegal. It's illegal to expire. Your store's still open. And the law got involved and said, that's bullshit. You can't expire something where you're still open. You could get a class action lawsuit and fight this, I'm sure. But I realized there's a psychodynamic to it, which is, is they're holding your car hostage. You're not doing what you're doing normally. Like if. What I'm saying is like if you were, if you were at a restaurant and you were like, I'll order a burger, but could I go ahead and have extra piece of tomato on that? They went, well, we're gonna charge you for two burgers if you do that because it only comes out. You go, this is bullshit, man. Get your fucking manager. Your car, car. It's like a hostage sitsuation. It's like Hamas as your grandson, you know what I mean? And you're like, you're like, look, none of this is fair, but I'll fucking do whatever you need me to do. I gotta get my boy back. You know what I mean? And they're starting, they're calling the shots. They got your kid.

[Sam Tripoli]

If you rent a car, this probably fits right into it because they give you a two hour window, right? If you don't, and I'm sure it used to be if you were two minutes late, they charge you for another day. And people probably took them to court, right? So they're like, like two hours. If you're two hours late, then you, then we charge you for another day.

[Adam Carolla]

But I realize in all this stuff, like when the tow truck grabs your car and impounds it, it's holding you, your car's held hostage. Like, you go to that window and you go, can I get something out of my car? And they go, no. It's like, can I see my grandson? Nope, you can't visit with the boy. He may be dead.

[Sam Tripoli]

Can I have proof of life? Can I have proof of life?

[Adam Carolla]

I'll tell you what, you get it. Nothing. Because we have your grandson and you're do what we tell you to do. You want to see your boy again? And you're like, this isn't right. Yeah, nobody asked for this.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah, well, exactly.

[Adam Carolla]

Cut that check, bro.

[Sam Tripoli]

The tow truck industry is just shady.

[Adam Carolla]

They, if they do, they take your car hostage and then you got to go negotiate with them to get it back.

[Sam Tripoli]

It's ridiculous. Dude, everything is nickeling and diming. That's what Vegas is going through right now. Now they're just nickeling and diming you on everything that nobody's going to Vegas anymore. It's so expensive. Someone showed, they. They got a pasta bowl.

[Adam Carolla]

I saw that.

[Sam Tripoli]

Pasta bowl. $50 for a pasta bowl?

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, it's crazy.

[Sam Tripoli]

I'll just go to the indie casino near my house and feel like I'm pretend I'm in Vegas.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. Go to God. Hustler. The Hustler Casino. Yeah.

[Sam Tripoli]

Let's just admit it. Everything was better when it was ran by the mobile.

[Adam Carolla]

Everything is better when it's ran by the mob. New York was better when it ran. Now they got Ben Dami. Gonna get in there, ruin the whole place.

[Sam Tripoli]

I got nothing but garbage choices for that one. That city is so screwed, dude. So screwed.

[Adam Carolla]

Let me ask you guys, this another one for you. I try to think of examples to make myself right, and I think I got this one down. I was flying. I told her I was flying first class at il. I was going up, going to Dallas. I said, what do you got? They go, it's also weird when the flight attendant doesn't know what you're talking about. I go, what's for breakfast? She goes, scrambled eggs. I go, just scrambled eggs? Scrambled eggs. They do a weird egg omelet where there's nothing in it. They just make a flat pancake of egg and they flip it over on itself. And it's like, why is that better than any? First off, all you did is do the worst part of an omelet. That's the worst part of an omelette. I'd much rather have scrambled eggs than flapjack flipped over rubbery eggs. But they did that. And then they doused it with Velveeta cheese, like liquid cheese. And I'm like, oh, God. First off, who wants this? Just do cheddar or Jack or Munster, whatever. And I was sitting there in first class lamenting this burnt offering of an omelet I got. It's a hollow, burnt offering of an omelet. It's an omelet with nothing in. It's the worst part. It's like Geraldo's vault. It's like Al Capone's vault. There's nothing there, just dirt in this omelette. So I'm, like, trying to eat around this shitty plastic, synthetic Velveeta cheese. And then I thought, huh? No one likes fucking Velveeta cheese. Why don't you just do cheddar, okay? They save a penny. Fine. Velveeta. Okay, first off, the rule is, if you will never do it on the ground, then don't do it in the air. I will never choose Fiesta Mix over Doritos on the ground. So then don't do it in the air. Yeah, I'll never eat straight pretzels on the ground.

[Sam Tripoli]

So crazy.

[Adam Carolla]

Don't do it like. I will never. I've never. I've lived with women. I'VE made food. I know a thousand people. I've never said to someone, what do you want on your omelette? And they went, just that pump Velveeta cheese that they serve at the stadium. The weird liquid shit that comes in a bag. Do you have any of that? I've never heard it. I've heard the sausage, I've heard the onion. I've heard 10 different kinds of cheeses. I've heard mushroom. I've heard bell pepper, everything. I've never. No one went, just a pump of shitty Nacho stadium cheese, please.

[Sam Tripoli]

That'll do it.

[Adam Carolla]

And by the way, don't put anything in an omelet. Make it a nice rubbery flap of pancake and then flip the rubbery flap over on top of each other. But don't put any onions or don't put any sausage or anything in there. And then just dump it. Also, has anyone. I've been to a million diners. I've seen the Denver omelette. I've seen the mushroom omelets, the meat lover. I've seen the Southwest omelette, the Spanish omelet. Anyone? That Velveeta pump omelette. Is anyone. You want to know why they don't offer that? Because no one would ever.

[Sam Tripoli]

Nobody wants it. Nobody wants it except for homeless people at 7:11.

[Adam Carolla]

And they don't even want it either. They're just taking it. So why even this in first class? Why even are we doing? So I started thinking about this Velveeta cheese and I thought, God damn, I hate this cheese. But then I realized there are people who like it for some reason or another. I don't know, dumb people mainly, but they like it. And then I thought, well, what if I was going to try to make an argument for this cheese? And I realized, you can't. So here's what I came up with. Salads. Salads will have cheese added to them to make them non salady. You know what I mean? Salad cheese is sort of the dairy version of bacon. It like makes shit better. Like, you want some broccoli? Not really. What if I doused it in this cheese? You know, like, all right, I'll take it now. You know what I mean? Cheese will help something.

[Sam Tripoli]

It dresses it up and it gives it.

[Adam Carolla]

Like you do a salad and you. You cut up some cheese and put the cheese in there and people do the Roquefort cheese or the goat cheese and they'll do cheddar cheese. There's a lot of salads with different cheeses. It is never American cheese. Because American cheese doesn't help anything. It would hurt a salad. It's the only cheese that would hurt a salad. If you get a salad and someone goes, you want some cheese on that? You go, yeah, yeah, because I don't really want a salad. Then they have the tortilla salad. Because that's just a salad. That's not. That's just a taco dumped into a bowl.

[Sam Tripoli]

It's an illegal salad.

[Adam Carolla]

It's an illegal salad, but it has the word salad in it so you feel good about yourself. But nobody would ever put Velveeta cheese on a salad because it would ruin the salad. There's eight other different types of cheese that will help a salad. This cheese hurts a salad, which means it hurts. And when it goes on top of the eggs, it just hurts the eggs.

[Sam Tripoli]

It's like extreme food makeover. You're just taking this dump and just making it fancy. That's what you're doing. Oh, look at the cheese sauce. It's not just flipped over. Hey, Velveeta.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't know.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Fact check that. I don't think Velveeta is even dairy bud.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't think it is either. That's my whole. It's. It's. I'm just saying.

[Sam Tripoli]

It's slime. Yeah, Slime weed.

[Adam Carolla]

Person on this flight that prefers this to a Denver omelet. And the answer is that person's never been born. It's never been born. It's a rubbery flap of cheese, a flap of egg that got folded on itself with a squirt of Velveeta on the top. And it fucking sucks.

[Sam Tripoli]

You're so right, dude. If they won't do it on the ground, they shouldn't do it in air. But it's just trying to do the bare minimum so they think you're enjoying the bells and whistles.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Well, to be fair, I've been through some facilities with that exact diet.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Sam Tripoli]

Why do we allow the leave just like him in the plant?

[Adam Carolla]

I'll be honest.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah. First class facility. Yeah, it sounds exactly like something that they would.

[Sam Tripoli]

Facility is right. Facility is right.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

They would pass off as food.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

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[Sam Tripoli]

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[Sam Tripoli]

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[Adam Carolla]

So the other thing I was then I was watching the NFL game. Oh my. Great game. What a game.

[Sam Tripoli]

That's the best I've ever seen a quarterback play. In my life, I've never seen anything like that. Like that.

[Adam Carolla]

It was amazing.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Just go. Clutch. Like, amazing. Just. Oh, it's time to go again.

[Sam Tripoli]

Down. What? 15.

[Adam Carolla]

I know.

[Sam Tripoli]

This even work?

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Legendary.

[Adam Carolla]

Then what? Yeah. Velveeta's milk. Whey milk. Protein concentrate, primary ingredients, along with canola oil, emulsified sodium phosphate and sodium citrate and preservatives.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah, it sounds like something they made up in World War II when they ran out of cheese because of Hitler.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah, it's basically everything that RFK Jr. Is fighting against, including the food coloring.

[Adam Carolla]

So the I'm watching NFL game and they run their. They did this thing where they're like, look, NFL stadium owners. You can either put it takes all of us in the end zone or end racism in the end zone. Because we have to pretend like we care about black people.

[Sam Tripoli]

No, no, not just black people. Black people making millions of dollars playing a kid's sport.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[Sam Tripoli]

They're like, end racism. Like, dude, you're crushing it. What? Talking about.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, but we'll fight them on cte, medical expenses and stuff after they retire. But anyway, okay, so I don't like it. I don't like it. And everyone wants to know, what is the problem? And I use the malaria example, which is if I went to another country and I turn on the TV, and in every one of their end zones of the soccer game, it said, stop malaria. I would think the country had a bad problem with malaria. I don't know what else to think. You're talking about malaria all the time. So I'd go, I was in Spain. Yeah. How is it? It's nice. But evidently there's a bad malaria problem because it's in. They ride it everywhere.

[Sam Tripoli]

Well, when you're in West Hollywood, there's a lot of std. Check mobile sites. There's probably a reason for that.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, they go where the getting's good. So I don't like any of it. Because. Because not only do we not live in a systemically racist country, the least place you'll find it is on an NFL Sunday. That is black guys, white guys, white coaches, black coaches, black players working in harmony to win a game, hugging regardless of the skin color. It's all equal, and it's a meritocracy. If there's one place we don't need. Maybe they need it in prison mayhem, but not on NFL racist.

[Sam Tripoli]

I mean, you could take the most racist dad in the world, and he would be totally fine with his white daughter dating the number one wide receiver of Quarterback, you'd be like, I like these blacks. But, hey, he's a good football player. That's how much not racism there is in the NFL.

[Adam Carolla]

Yes.

[Sam Tripoli]

It's, like, unbelievable.

[Adam Carolla]

It's the one place you don't know, but they do it anyway, and they can't help it. And it bums me out, and I don't like it. And people go, how could it hurt? And I go, because it creates this veneer of black people thinking we live in a racist society. So, A, you don't have to try, or B, if a cop pulls you over, fight him, because he's gonna try to kill you and you're getting people killed, you fucking idiots.

[Sam Tripoli]

I totally agree with that.

[Adam Carolla]

Stop it.

[Sam Tripoli]

I watch all those cop. Like those body cam things. It's amazing how people talk themselves into felonies. It's unbelievable. And here's a big thing about that. The truth of the matter is professional sports, Hollywood entertainment, it is bread and circus. It's meant to kind of like shift focus off of real world problems for a moment. You can just watch athletes compete. When you. When you start inserting that stuff, it takes away from what's meant to be, which is a shifting of focus. Now we're thinking about world problems where we just want to watch our team beat the other team. It's counterproductive of what sports has always been.

[Adam Carolla]

But also, it's like the black receiver from South Central has to jump over the racism sign to do the Lambeau leap. To have 18 white guys all try to shower him with love simultaneous. And he's, like, dug in. Like when Dino would see Fred coming down the drive, like, it's a black guy, there's dreadlocks, and there's five guys from Wisconsin that trying to hug him so hard.

[Sam Tripoli]

They're killing him.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, he stepped over the racism. So to do the leap into the crowd with all the guys with the Brock.

[Sam Tripoli]

That's so true, dude. You nailed that one, dude. That's unbelievable.

[Adam Carolla]

So I saw this commercial, which is. First things first, everyone is black. See, here's what white people do. Progressive politicians do it all the time.

[Sam Tripoli]

All the time.

[Adam Carolla]

It is racism. It's the height of racism, which is these people don't fucking understand. They don't have access to checking accounts.

[Sam Tripoli]

You're so right, bro. Have the ability to, you know, talk about that. Malcolm X and the Unabomber said that exact thing. White progressives, they call them white liberals back then, but white progressives, really, it's not that they. They feel for you. They Actually look down on you.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, when you're talking about the stuff they take a stand on is it's a bridge too far to ask these people to get an ID Number one, they don't have access to id. And you know when they're standing in line to vote in Georgia, someone can't give them water, they're gonna. That's what you do with pets. If you leave a pet in the car, you should have cracked the window. They don't know how to operate the door. Why'd you leave the black guy in the car with no water?

[Sam Tripoli]

It's so crazy. You know that light skinned chick on the View? Sunny something? Yeah, dude. So she is constantly talking about reparations for slavery. And then it turns out her family owned slaves back and they were selling slaves. Like, why don't you pay out the reparations? You start first.

[Adam Carolla]

I can't believe you brought this up because I just sent a tweet out about this. Cause there's a white chick, somebody tweeted like white chicks going, if you're white, you should pay reparations. So I think about it. First off, my dad, his family, they didn't own a donkey. Forget about a human being. He said they were renters. They came here from Italy. They lived in South Philly in a fucking apartment building. Everyone was busted. My dad died four months ago. He left me a Tony Bennett seat. He didn't leave me a flock of slaves. He gave to him, I gave to him. That's why he gave it back to me. I got my Tony Bennett seat. I didn't get a flock of slaves. Good 80s, man. So it's a Black Flock of Seagulls cover band. And I ran. I ran from the master. Yeah. Okay, so all right, but let's start at the start. Last I checked, when they do that poor history thing, Ben Affleck family had slaves. Sonny Hawson's family had slaves. Who was the other guy?

[Sam Tripoli]

There was a professor of civil rights, I believe. Family owned slaves.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Miller's earned a couple in the Revolutionary War.

[Adam Carolla]

Right?

[Sam Tripoli]

Congratulations.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, Anderson Coopers. Okay, so can we do this? Here's what we would do. Adam Carolla, are you for reparations? Answer. No. Why not? Well, I've learned giving people free shit does not help them get along.

[Sam Tripoli]

Doesn't it?

[Adam Carolla]

Does not. And it in fact hurts them. Ask the folks who used to live on Bikini island before we moved them off and then blew it up with a new how they were doing when we said, we'll give you free Pool tables and beer and you can just live on this other island. They all got fat and got diabetes. How's it work when people win the lottery?

[Sam Tripoli]

Right?

[Adam Carolla]

Okay, so I don't believe in giving people free shit. Not cuz I don't like them. I think it hurts them. But good news, Pops Corolla never owned a slave and neither did anyone in my family. They came here from Italy, nobody owned anything. And everyone's formerly poor, so that's good. Now, now, Anderson Cooper, Ben Affleck and the aforementioned. Oh, Larry David. Larry David, Larry David, Larry David, and also Sunny Hostin. You guys are progressive. Yeah. Will you believe in reparation? Yeah. Oh, this is good because you're family owned slaves.

[Sam Tripoli]

I totally agree.

[Adam Carolla]

So go. And you're rich. So this works out perfectly for you, Larry David, because you believe in this thing. Let's break it down. You want to give money to these people, why? Because they were wronged. By who? Not by the Corollas. We don't own any. I mean, you go, well, what if someone gets in a horrible car accident? Don't they deserve to get paid? Well, not by me. I didn't hit them. But if you hit them and you're rich and you think they deserve to be paid, well, this is great news.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah, it's like if we all own a Toyota and someone in Milwaukee gets an accident, Toyota, we all owe them money. It's like it's absolutely not.

[Adam Carolla]

No. The person that hits them owes them money 100%.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Oh shit, man. I ain't got no acres to give.

[Adam Carolla]

No mules and no acres. So Larry David is progressive and Anson Cooper's progressive and this is good news. Ben Affleck, I guess, and Sunny Hostin. And by the way, the list goes on and on of super rich notables.

[Sam Tripoli]

Everyone who goes on that show, they're.

[Adam Carolla]

Like, man, you were sabo.

[Sam Tripoli]

That's right. I told my agent not to put me on this show. I had a joke about the time because you remember when California was debating slavery, even though they slavery was never legal in California and they would, they would have these meetings in San Francisco and there were just dudes walking up shooting for us. I think it should be $200 million. I'm like, I would do that too. I would just shoot for the stars. Why not? And I said if they actually got reparation payments, I was going to open up a Cadillac Escalade dealership and gold chain store and call it Whips and Chains.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh yeah. Line around the block.

[Sam Tripoli]

Welcome down to Whips and chains. Bring your reparation money down.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, my God, bro.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

It's good enough.

[Adam Carolla]

So. All right, so I really mean it. Like, this notion of, like. Well, what about reparations? Again, there's two things I would say. One is plenty of white people, like, everyone in my family has no money. So I don't know how the reparation part works. They don't have money.

[Sam Tripoli]

Italians were treated so bad that they had to change their names. My grandfather was the only one in his family that didn't change his name because Italians weren't allowed to work anywhere. The Irish were slaves, too. Nobody ever talks about that.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. We didn't invent slavery.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

The story about Millers is that we came to America and indentured servants, and then one generation owned some farm equipment.

[Adam Carolla]

So not only do we not have any money, we don't want it. I'm against it anyway. But these guys. Anderson Cooper is a Vanderbilt and he comes from tons of money. So A, he wants it and B, he can afford it. So this is an easy fit. Let the rich people who had slaves do it.

[Sam Tripoli]

Find the names of all the slave owners.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

But even they don't believe that. That, you know, they're really responsible for their.

[Adam Carolla]

Weird dude.

[Sam Tripoli]

How all these slave owner descendants, so many of them are famous and elites. It's like. It's like a perma class.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Well, but normally, yeah, if you had. Think about it at the time, unfortunately, the way we looked at that, the people, black people, was as farm equipment. So if you had a lot of it, well, then you were a rich guy.

[Sam Tripoli]

And you get passed down those 1% of the South. 1%.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Sam Tripoli]

Everyone's heck, like, they, like, they. Everyone had a slave. Like my buddy. My buddy.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, so. And also they get in this weird stuff like, who do you think built Chicago? It's like, well, not slaves. I don't know who's responsible for the space program. Well, you can't just do everything as slaves. This nation was built on slaves.

[Sam Tripoli]

Okay, first people in space. Slaves.

[Adam Carolla]

Slaves. All right, so now this commercial, which drives me nuts right in the middle of the football game, and it's causing more harm there. So first off, count how many black faces are on this commercial versus white faces. But. All right. All right.

[Sam Tripoli]

Ready, guys? You guys gotta be loud, though. Okay, let's go, let's go.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay, repeat after me. Yes, sir. I am. I am somebody, somebody.

[Sam Tripoli]

I may be young, I may be.

[Adam Carolla]

Young, but I am. But I am Somebody, somebody.

[Sam Tripoli]

I may be small, I may be small, but I am I am somebody.

[Adam Carolla]

My clothes are different. My clothes are different. My face is different.

[Sam Tripoli]

My face is different.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, hold on. Pause. First off, your face is different than whose? The people in the commercial. Everyone on the commercial's black.

[Sam Tripoli]

Who are you talking to, mutants?

[Adam Carolla]

You may be different.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

This is the TSA training program.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Future TSA people, they roll in a dummy of Mike. Would you practice blocking and tackling on Mike? You take Mike's shirt and pull it over the back of your hand. First off, this thing In America, it's 2025. I may look different. Everyone looks different. What the fuck are you talking about? Who you talking about? Everyone in this commercial is black. Do you look different than someone in this commercial?

[Sam Tripoli]

Commercial?

[Adam Carolla]

You got twins. You got black twins with diabetes.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

There was a couple honkies sprinkled in.

[Adam Carolla]

One kid's got down syndrome coming up. But anyway. All right, just go back 10 seconds.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Thanks for the warning.

[Adam Carolla]

I wanted to emotionally prepare you. Somebody. I must be respected. I must be respected. All right, hold on a second. You don't have to be respected. You have to do good.

[Sam Tripoli]

You gotta do respectable.

[Adam Carolla]

You gotta do respectable. This is. You have no idea what we did with the self esteem movement. We fucked our country up so badly with this self esteem. You don't must repeat after me. I must be respected. I must be respected. You know, you're creating little fucking monsters.

[Sam Tripoli]

100%.

[Adam Carolla]

You earn your respect.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

And is Shane Gillis in every commercial.

[Sam Tripoli]

I mean, look at that. That's the best looking downs I've ever seen.

[Adam Carolla]

Are they all have down syndrome in here? All right, go back.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah, I think that whole group is the downs.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay, all right, so we'll let white people in. But just. All right. Gotta be respected. But I am. But I am Somebody. Somebody. I must be respected. I must be respected. Protected. Protected. Never rejected.

[Sam Tripoli]

Never rejected. But I am. I am Somebody. Somebody.

[Adam Carolla]

I am I am Somebody. Somebody.

[Sam Tripoli]

I am. I am Somebody.

[Adam Carolla]

Somebody.

[Sam Tripoli]

I am. I am Somebody.

[Adam Carolla]

Somebody. I am. I am somebody. Every kid can be somebody if they have somebody to show them that they're somebody. At Family sports, more than 50,000. Blah, blah, blah. NFL takes all of us. All right. Are you just empowering fucking kids, by the way? I'm doing the math. Isn't there another locker room who's about to play? You guys who are somebody as well. Why do you get to dominate the other somebody's? Why you? Why you're all the best.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah. They're not going to respect you on the field when they're laying into you because you think you're somebody. Somebody.

[Adam Carolla]

It also implies that if you don't make the team, you're nobody. You will not.

[Sam Tripoli]

I know.

[Adam Carolla]

I will not be rejected. Yeah, I'm somebody. How dare you cut me from this team?

[Sam Tripoli]

We cut you last week.

[Adam Carolla]

Why are you here?

[Sam Tripoli]

I'm somebody.

[Adam Carolla]

Somebody. Yeah. We caught you stealing equipment and trying to.

[Sam Tripoli]

The mascot somebody.

[Adam Carolla]

Right? But we saw you trying to let you trying to light the bleachers on fire.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

The opposite of Hitler Youth.

[Sam Tripoli]

I don't know what is going on at the NFL. The NFL is like, we'll do whatever we want, and you're going to watch anyways, which is the suicide note of every single business ever. Whenever they said you're going, whenever you tell the buyer what they have to like or what, you press them. This is the NFL. They just like, you're going to watch us. You need us. And we're like, the news, Hollywood, they all said that. Dude, the NBA said that. And nobody watches.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, the part I don't like is it's just a bunch of rich white dudes. You want to talk about people? You don't look like Roger Goodell, Jerry Jones. No one in that commercial looked like those guys. It's super rich. Going, look, we have these fucking people who play that make up billions of dollars, and we can't agitate them. And it's that same thing that Steve Kerr and all the NBA coaches do. They go, look, if I come out there wearing a MAGA hat, I'm not gonna be able to coach this team. So what is it you gu into? Well, we're into reparations or we're into Black lives matter. All right, well, give me the pin. I'll put it on. I'll take a knee, whatever I got to do. Because I got a roster of 12 guys and 10 are black. And the two that aren't aren't starting. So that's why I do whatever I got to do.

[Sam Tripoli]

Jack Del Rio was like, oh, the Raiders, like, five or six years ago because he was a Trump guy. And they were like, nope, you can't coach us. And they fired him. You know Pete Bullach, the guy who was like, in the Afghanistan CIA guy and has been trying to run for president, and they did some polling on him, and he pulled with Black people at 0. 0. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But polls at 0. So the next day, there's a video out of him drinking 40s with black people in a bag break dancing. Yeah. 100%. No, they were in Central Park.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

You look it up, man dressed like Run dmc.

[Sam Tripoli]

He was just hanging out with these two guys at a show on Showtime. They had a popular podcast, Ass. And he's just sitting there and they hand him a. A brown paper bag with a 40.

[Adam Carolla]

In it and they.

[Sam Tripoli]

And he can't even drink it naturally.

[Adam Carolla]

Right?

[Sam Tripoli]

It's so crazy. If you find it's on the Internet, it's just him drinking before he's with black people. That's how he's.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

That's what you Google.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah, that's why. That's why when Hillary was like. When they're like, dude, so what do you do black? She's like, I got hot sauce in my purse. You're like, someone some AI told you how to talk to black people. Yeah. And it's so inorganic. It's crazy.

[Adam Carolla]

I love the A and the B on the Jasmine Crockett. Do you see those? Oh, God, Andrew, you can find the A and the B on Jasmine Crockett. They just dropped one like four or five days ago, I think. I liked it where she sounds, she.

[Sam Tripoli]

Speaks proper and then she gets really like.

[Adam Carolla]

Oh, she just takes grammar and fucking takes an axe to it, man. Like, it's so funny. The same person, by the way, as an adult, you know what I mean? Like, this is three and a half years later. It's not like when you're a kid or you're in high school or you excuse this or that because you had that phase where you're really into this, whatever that thing was, punk or goth or some shit or rock or rap. Or you can excuse a 17 year old for getting caught up in something. Everyone sees the old pictures and makes fun of themselves. Yeah, I'm talking age 37, age 41. Normally the cement on the sidewalk of life is dried by then. So listen, just listen to the A and the B of what she sounds like. And by the way, if you're black, you should be insulted 100%. 100%. All right, we'll play it here.

[Sam Tripoli]

It is good to see you on the New year. You know, no one could have told me that when I went down to Austin. Now looks like a little bit over.

[Adam Carolla]

A year ago that I would be running for Congress, baby.

[Sam Tripoli]

Cuz these people, they are crazy because they always talk about how Christian they is. Yeah, I don't know how many of them on that side are getting divorced because they getting caught up sleeping with their co workers, staffers, interns, all the things. Yeah, you ain't got to believe me. Just go, go Google. You'll find some of it, I'm telling you.

[Adam Carolla]

And the wives is being messy and petty.

[Sam Tripoli]

They putting it in. It's like, unbelievable.

[Adam Carolla]

You should be. I do. I say to black people every once in a while, aren't you fucking insulted that Joe Biden gets. It's like, for the. Everything is blacks can't. You know, they're good. They're just as smart business people as rich people, but they can't get lawyers and they can't get. Does it ever get tiring or does it bothersome? I would be angered. I'd be insulted.

[Sam Tripoli]

Have you ever seen when someone. Someone went to Berkeley and they asked black people about voting. White. White people at berkeley about voter IDs law? And they're like saying, exactly. They can't. They can't get licenses. They don't know how. They can't get on the Internet. And then they go to Brooklyn and they're like, do you have an id? Everyone's like, yeah, who doesn't have an id? Can you get on the Internet? They're like, oh, I have an iPhone. Like, what are we talking about? And again, it gets into what the, you know, the Unabomber and what Malcolm X pull said. It's. It's actually, they look down on you. It's 100% true. And there's this bit of Stockholm syndrome as well. Like, I've been on podcasts, we're hosted by black hosts, and you start getting into the psyop that was black gangster rap and how it's completely contrived, and they defend it like, oh, this is what the streets was about. It's like, no, actually, it wasn't like that before that. It was actually, like, kind of pushed on you. And this. This whole thing we hear about culture, culture, culture. People mistake their culture for their herit heritage. It's not the same thing. Culture is manufactured. If you talk about a jujitsu school, they go, oh, they got great culture, right? That's manufactured over time. It's discipline and all that stuff. It's not a natural thing. It's actually worked upon. Same thing with hip hop culture, black culture, white culture. It's all manufactured mostly through these think tanks to get people to make the worst decisions in their life. Like, I've gotten in arguments with people, people about Islam, how Islam treats women, and how the west treats women. And we all agree free will is the best way to go, right? But our free will comes with billions, if not trillions of dollars of psyops convincing us to make the worst decisions.

[Adam Carolla]

Possible.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yes. You look at the. The Islamic women, and they don't have a lot of choices in life, but the choices that women have in America and, like, do whatever you want, live your life. But it has. His been. It has been disastrous. They're all meant. They all admit to having mental illness. They all, like, are single A's with cats, and it just goes on and on and on forever. And it's all part of, like, psyops convince you to make the worst decisions possible. And this is. This is plug and play. She thinks people relate with hood rats, so she starts talking like a hood rat, even though she went to an extremely expensive high school.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, I have no room to talk.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

On this because I coach, like, a.

[Adam Carolla]

Lot of black fighters, and I get.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Into my G mode talking, and then when I go out to Hawaii and coach the Hawaiian fighters, you start talking.

[Sam Tripoli]

Pigeons start talking pigeon.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Oh, all of a sudden, I'm not here.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm from the island, bro. I'm ohana. Yeah, but she knows there's a version of this where you're sort of. Everyone is guilty of it. Because, like, I was very poor and very blue collar, and then I was raised. So when you're hanging around with the dudes who are working in blue collar, you don't start talking about your Bentleys in the shop again and stuff. You go back to, like, yeah, I used to do swing a hammer and had an apartment with some dudes, slept on a futon. Like, you go into that world and you change your vocabulary a little. I don't say indubitably that much in front of the blue collar guys. And then you shift over to your rich white comedian buddies, and you're trying to talk in a slightly different language, but it's not like you've made up a line of bullshit to try to convince these people to do something for you. It's just you sort of realize, like, when you go to dinner with your buddies, you talk one way, and when you go to your new girlfriend's house to meet her parents for dinner, you talk another way. It's still you, but it's a version of you that is sort of curtailed for them.

[Sam Tripoli]

Code switching.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Code switching.

[Sam Tripoli]

Code switching. Yep.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, we should take a break, and then we'll come back and do the news with Mayhem and Sam. Right this. O'Reilly Auto Parts. Yeah, O'Reilly Auto Parts. You know the jingle. They're in the business of keeping your car on the road. O'Reilly Auto Parts offers friendly, helpful service and the parts knowledge you need for all your maintenance and all your repairs. I've always used these cars, guys. I use them to prep my race cars, take them out to the race track. They got everything I need over there. And they're convenient and they're polite and they know their business. It's not one of those places where they just hire a bunch of guys with GEDs that stand around, don't know the subject. They know it. So whether you're a car aficionado or an auto novice, you'll find the employees at O'Reilly Auto Parts are knowledgeable, helpful, and best of all, they are friends. Stop by O'Reilly Auto Parts today or you can visit us online@o'reillyauto.com Adam that's o'reillyauto.com Adam homes.com Some might say that homes.com is the best home shopping site. And maybe homes.com's super comprehensive and transparent agent director. Or Maybe it's that homes.com is the only site that always directly connects you with the listing agent who knows the home the best. Or Perhaps it's because homes.com has the most in depth neighborhood content of any home shopping site that's extensively researched to highlight the personality of each neighborhood neighborhood. Homes.com goes above and beyond to bring home shoppers the in depth info they need to find the right home. So if you're looking, it's got to be homes.com homes.com we've done your homework.

[Sam Tripoli]

I have no skills except for maybe well crafted dick jokes. That's about all I'm good at.

[Adam Carolla]

Sam Tripoli is on the Adam Carolla show. Sam's got third Crowdworks special that's gonna be dropping on YouTube September 20th, by the way, live from Kansas City. So you can check that out Coming out soon. Sam's stuff's done very nicely on YouTube.

[Sam Tripoli]

Thank you.

[Adam Carolla]

Also, Mayhem over here. And by the way, podcast Tinfoil Hat, of course, dates up as well. And Mayhem's got some news. What do you got there?

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah, this is setting the Internet on fire. A Phillies fan chase down takes a ball from a kid after a confrontation about Harrison Bader's home run.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, everyone. Boy, we're the Internet. So weird.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah, I love the Internet. Just every once in a while, turn on one particular.

[Adam Carolla]

Karen. Yeah, I'll tell you who's, I'll tell you who's over the moon about this. The Polish executive stole that hat from fired. I know, but he's still over the moon about this predicament. It's like somebody bumped me off the leader board. Yeah. Go get her.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah, 100%.

[Adam Carolla]

That couple who got caught cheating at the concert, it was kissing up on the jumbotron. They're happy for the Polish guy who came in. You know, if you're lucky. If you're lucky and you're. The Polish guy stole the hat. This comes in the following morning. You don't have to suffer for seven days. You know what I mean?

[Sam Tripoli]

Moved on. The mob has moved on.

[Adam Carolla]

So she. He hits a homer, and the dad runs over and it plunks right in the chair in front of her.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

The dad runs over, grabs it, runs back to the.

[Sam Tripoli]

And he's in the right. She's in the wrong. At this moment.

[Adam Carolla]

He gives it to his kid, and then she grabs his shoulder and he wants to.

[Sam Tripoli]

Surprise.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. She's in the wrong. And he does the. I don't know, something hit the ground. All right, let's pause it for a second. The kid's. I don't know, 9 or 10. The rule is, best I can tell is if the ball makes it to the ground, it's anyone's ball.

[Sam Tripoli]

It's anyone's game. She dropped it.

[Adam Carolla]

It's the NFL Sunday. Ball popped out on the punt return. It's not like. Well, it's on our side of the field. It's ball on the ground, whoever gets it. Now, you catch the ball in your hat, and some guy comes around and grabs it out of your hat. That's taking your ball.

[Sam Tripoli]

That's wrong.

[Adam Carolla]

If it hits the ground, theoretically, once it hits the stadium floor, somebody from outside of the stadium could walk in and pull it off the ground. And it's still their role. So there's no proximity rule outlined in.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

The court case of Finders v. Keepers.

[Adam Carolla]

That's right. Once it hits the ground. So he goes over and he gets it, and he gets it for his kid, and he gives it to his kid. And then she does the Karen move, where she runs up over and gets them all hopped up and he's hugging his kid and his kid's happy. And then they give the ball back. Right.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

The problem here is situational awareness. If he was scanning the crowd, he would have recognized her from her hair cunt.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, right.

[Sam Tripoli]

She's got 101 Dalmatians. She's got a whole.

[Adam Carolla]

She's a Cruella Deville haircut.

[Sam Tripoli]

She's all word. Now, one thing I will say about her.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

No, wait, let's stop.

[Adam Carolla]

Look.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Gave it back to her.

[Sam Tripoli]

That's where he's wrong. I would. So she Goes. And if you. There's multiple angles of this, she's like, I want to give it to my kid. Okay. So it's not really an adult one to hold it. The ball. She wanted to give it to her kid. So I understand that. But the rules are, if it hits the ground, anyone could grab it. He should not have gave her back the ball. Now it works out for them because we got this new thing where, like, if you rob a kid of a ball ball, the team has him come back and meet and get a bat and all that stuff.

[Adam Carolla]

I was embarrassed to say that if I were him, I would have given her the ball back just because I'm very much like, just get the fuck out of here. Like, I don't even give a shit. And by the way, it's a middle of the season home run ball. It's worth 20 bucks. Like, who cares? But she's horrible. But his thing is, is he is getting fragged now for giving the ball back, but also for having a spot spasm. See, that's like. Well, he got the vapors. Like, she. We watch his tape again. He literally goes into convulsion. He's in a public space.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Like in a 50s cartoon. He walks back, gives it to his son. He's hugging the son. She grabs him and he does a weird triple fist. Weird.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Which is weird effeminate gesture I've ever seen on a man.

[Adam Carolla]

He had, like an epileptic seizure, right? Yeah. And his look is like. Now, to be fair to him, she's invading quite a bit of his face.

[Sam Tripoli]

She is in his face.

[Adam Carolla]

She's got the lean.

[Sam Tripoli]

This might have something to do with what he gets at home, too. He's getting flashbacks. He's like, oh, even here I'm getting yelled at by Karen. I can't go anywhere.

[Adam Carolla]

It took the boy to get away from the violent shrew for three hours, and I'm getting attacked by this one.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah, well, to be fair, too, I mean, she's the trifecta. Like, if she, like, you know, she's what, a woman? Lesbian and Jewish. It's like a hate crime to even touch her.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, that's so true.

[Sam Tripoli]

Jewish, I wouldn't doubt it. But if you. If you go back. So later on, they interview the. The kids and the dad, and the kids give them kind of.

[Adam Carolla]

The dad?

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah. They're like, why the. And even though it worked out even better for them because they got more of balls and bats and all that stuff. So, like, dad, you're such a dude.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. A little bit.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

But also too, man. This is society we live in. Because if he were to do, say, hey, start yelling and cussing, the law is not. Maybe technically the law is on your side, but not really a woman.

[Sam Tripoli]

It's the Internet, and they have certain rules, and they would have just laid into them.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

And they have, hell, we are.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah. It's weird because he had the wherewithal to walk 18ft more. Go scramble for the ball. Which is like a proactive. Dude. If I was in the stands and the ball landed 20ft away, I'd just be like, I'm not gonna fucking dive in. A bunch of peanuts over there.

[Sam Tripoli]

The ball.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, there it is. Yeah. Well, it didn't hit us, but he had this sort of. He was proactive enough to rush across, grab it. And then when she saw him, he turned into this sort of. He's turned into. There was a movie called Sorry. There's a TV show called Lost in Space. And they had that cowardly gay gu. So I was like, we're gonna get into trouble. He turned into that guy.

[Sam Tripoli]

He turned into CP3.0, right?

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

That's who he is.

[Sam Tripoli]

Aye, aye, aye, R2. D2.

[Adam Carolla]

We're in trouble.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

I thought you guys were going, danger, Will Robinson.

[Adam Carolla]

Now she's a. Now, can we argue this as human beings? This is what we react to, right? It's not about the ball. It's about her. And we got a little peek behind the curtain into who this bitch is. Oh, yeah, because you could see her at the supermarket doing some version of this in the parking. Doing another version of this. Sir.

[Sam Tripoli]

Excuse you, sir.

[Adam Carolla]

You know, like, also, she's pissed off, and that's the wrong posture to have. You can go over there and go, my son has special needs, and I promised him a ball. And do you think. You know. But she's, like, going in there to settle his hash, and he didn't do anything.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yes. Well, it gets into what you always talk about girl speak. Right? Girl thinking. And it's just like, she thinks because it was near her, that's her ball. And it's like, this is the jungle, bitch. It's like, survival of the fittest. But the biggest thing is, like, I guarantee your husband's like, oh, now you know my world. Yeah, now you know my fucking world.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, so this is what happened to her. Did she get fired? Did she get.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

No, there's no. I mean, look, we're going to pile on until she does get fired.

[Sam Tripoli]

I just think it's also stupid. This Isn't the same thing with the hat. It's not the same. The hat was given to the kid and the guy grabs it from the kids.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

That's different.

[Sam Tripoli]

That's totally shows a lack of character, like survival. The fittest and obviously she's the fittest. Bite like getting in this guy's face and she's entitled.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

She punked him for it.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm always jealous of these people. I would never get up and go do that. I'd just be jealous.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

There's no winning there. I would have yelled at that lady and probably went to jail. Floyd Mayweather's gonna fight Mike Tyler Tyson.

[Adam Carolla]

Has anyone want to see you?

[Sam Tripoli]

Damn right.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

I want to see this retirement home battle.

[Sam Tripoli]

It's going to be, it's going to be. I mean obviously Mayweather has had what they've said, some financial problems with the IRS taxes and he saw how big the Jake Paul Mike Tyson fight was. So he's like, I'll do that too. I'll do an exhibition and they'll probably talk to each other. Let's not hurt each other, let's just get out out of this.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

They have a nice sparring, that's sparring.

[Sam Tripoli]

People tune in because it's Mike Tyson and Floyd Mayweather and it's like, I'm happy they're getting their money, dude. You know, I'm glad the Casuals will love it.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Yeah.

[Sam Tripoli]

Did you ever check out his one man show?

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Oh yeah, of course.

[Sam Tripoli]

He was amazing, dude. And when he puts up the number of how much money he lost, which was like $410 million and it's like.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

You could feel the hate for Don King.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah. He's like, but, but if, like you could either be like a lit, have a little money or be that Michael Jackson, Mike Tyson broke, where you just go 400 mil in the hole and you're just buying everything and nobody, you're just like, I'll take the Elephant man skeleton. You like got money, I'm Michael Jackson. Just give it to him. Just give it to him, dude. I mean you're just buying, you're buying white tigers. You don't give a dude when you're that deep in hole.

[Adam Carolla]

And also so circling back to what we're talking about before, which is the Don Kings of the world got the Mike Tysons because they convinced them they were black and they were their brother and they knew their pain. And you're not gonna let some Jewish guy handle this. Cuz I know, I'm from the streets, I know who you are. And then the black guy proceeds to rip off one whole every time. And what I want to say to the black citizen is like, okay, you're gonna get Maxine Waters in there because she's black and she feels you, and all she does is get rich and do whatever the fuck she wants. And you never get it. Further ahead, get a Jewish guy who actually does his job and gives a shit and stop worrying about who he looks like or what you look like that fucking person's gonna rip you off and fuck you over. They're never gonna do anything. And you guys keep voting for these people, like they're gonna do something, something for them. It'd be like me voting for Gavin Newsom going, I'm heterosexual. I'm over six foot. I'm white. Yeah, I like that guy.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

Because I feel like he's gonna help me. It's like he's not doing anything for you.

[Sam Tripoli]

All the time. All the. And you always see it. There's some black entertainer comes in, has a bunch of white guys behind him, and then the white guys disappear. It's all black. And then the wheels fall off.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Sam Tripoli]

I always said this, man. It's like the real. The real OGs are the ones who keep people around that were there when they were broke. Like, because those people. Those people were with you when you had nothing. And it's like, I get it. There's certain people might have certain ideas, but to get rid of all your crew for a whole new crew that only knows you when you're rich, I think that sets you up for a lot of problems.

[Adam Carolla]

Agreed. All right, so wait a minute. What story was this?

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Oh, this is Mike Tyson.

[Adam Carolla]

Mike Tyson? Yeah. I don't know. Look, it's gonna work. It's gonna happen it every time. People go, come on, who cares? This is amateur hour. It's a circus. It's a circus. I'm not buying into this. And then he just keeps trickling, trickling, trickling, trickling, trickling. And then some point, four months from now, you're driving to your buddy's house, speeding. We're going to miss the prelims. Everyone's chipped in. 40 bucks. We got the pay per view. Somehow you went from. From arms folded to now, come on. Never again to sucked into this. And now watching.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Same thing happened with the Jake Paul, Mike Tyson. We were here.

[Adam Carolla]

400 people watching.

[Sam Tripoli]

That was gonna happen at the. At the presser where their crew and his crew were going. Everyone's like, it's real blood, Doc. It's really bad blood.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, and we'll get sucked in. They know it. That's how it works.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Well, Sam, I don't know if you're looking for a new opener, but Amanda Knox makes fun of her Italian murder case and a new standup routine. Oh, I think we got some video.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, let's.

[Sam Tripoli]

She is hot. I can fix her.

[Adam Carolla]

Fix her wood. There is this really good Hulu series that's out now called the Twisted Tale of Amanda Knox Forewarning. It is intense.

[Sam Tripoli]

Like, you know, your 20s were rough.

[Adam Carolla]

When people want to binge watch them, you know.

[Sponsor/Advertisement Voice]

You know, I've been executive producing this.

[Adam Carolla]

Thing for four years, which incidentally is the same amount of time that I spent in prison.

[Sam Tripoli]

I would.

[Adam Carolla]

I haven't played Tacoma Comedy Club not that long ago.

[Sam Tripoli]

I love that place.

[Adam Carolla]

I agree.

[Sam Tripoli]

It's a great club.

[Adam Carolla]

Here's a thing, it's. Look, you know, as long as we're going all in and racism on this show, if you. You watch not this doc, but the one they made before it or whatever, the doc is in that doc. They're in some small town out of Puttanesca, Italy or something, and it's a bunch of chicks and like Italian dudes and something. And then out of nowhere, like one scary black guy shows up to hang out and party. This guy looks like the guy stabbed the chick on the train and he just shook up. And it's a bunch of college age white girls. And then five minutes later they find the body, stabbed a hundred times, and they're like, well, we got the guy with the criminal record who doesn't need to be here, and he just kind of showed up. But don't worry about him. Let's focus on this 19 year old chick who's got no beef with the dead chick. And it's like, what are the chances? Why not? The guy with the criminal history, the brother, the dicey criminal guy who's in this mix. The rest are just college girls and guys who wanted to party with the college girls. And I don't know what happened, but they're like, ignore that guy.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah, ignore Captain Obvious.

[Adam Carolla]

I mean, you guys can look, you can look it up and see if you find that guy. But you're just watching the doc going, first off, I'm not a betting man, but if I was, I'd go with the guy with the criminal record. Who's your brother who rolled into town.

[Sam Tripoli]

He's plus 500 the rolling. No, he's minus 500.

[Adam Carolla]

That's 500.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah, he's minus 500.

[Adam Carolla]

The other one they did was that it was the same one with the Chandra Levy. Chandra Levy was Gary Condit's like worked in his office and he was a, I don't know, Congressman or something. And she went jogging at that park in D.C. right? And she goes jogging in this park in D.C. and gets pulled off the trail and raped and murdered in the bushes, right? And they're trying to pin it on Gary Condit, right, the congressman. Cuz he's having an affair and they found out or whatever they're trying to say he did it, right? And at Some point the DA from that area of D.C. they found a guy who was in prison for polling women who are wearing earbuds, earphones at the time time pulling him jogging. His MO was he'd pull him off the trail and rape him in the, in the bushes and try to kill him. And they caught him and they put him in prison. And so people are like, that might be your guy who did this in the same park, cuz his MO is pulling jogging chicks off the trail and raping them in the bushes. And the DA was like, don't even bother buddy. Looking at that guy. We're focused on Gary Khan and it's like maybe just a glimpse at where that guy was and if his DNA matches up. Let's just put it on the table of possibilities that the guy's currently incarcerated for pulling this chick off the trail in the same park.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

A DA is a public facing job, so they want this big kind of.

[Adam Carolla]

Number, I get it. But leave her mind open to the possibility that maybe this guy did. And guess what? That I did it.

[Sam Tripoli]

Well, I tweeted this yesterday. I'm like, if you want to live in a proper society, kill political correctness. Kill it man. Because that allows people to act out of pocket, not get called out on their bullshit. I don't care what happened to you in the past. I don't care how tragic it was. Show me a group, I'll show you a tragedy. It's like this just allows people to act out pocket because people aren't afraid. People are afraid to call them out because it'll be called racist or sexist or anti semitic or whatever it is. And it's just like total bullshit. When you get to the point where those words don't affect you, that's the freaking place you can get to. And it's just ridiculous. It's like some fucking scumbag started a gofundme for the guy that stabbed a chick. On the bus. Like, what low vibrational piece of shit demon are you where you think this guy needs help? When you watch him, he just like looks at her sit down, pulls out the knife, opens it and just goes like, why do you want to save this guy?

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

I'm getting to that. Yeah. But Amanda Knox is doing stand up now and she's going to get booked at the Mothership because Joe Rogan says she's a murderer.

[Sam Tripoli]

She wants open for me.

[Adam Carolla]

I don't. Again, the chances of that chick from Spokane or right where she was from with the zero criminal history. Like, you go, that's the one who gored the roommate. And they were stupid. And they go back to. And they go like. Well, they saw her hugging her boyfriend at the police scene. It's like, okay. Doesn't make you a murderer.

[Sam Tripoli]

People react to trauma. I know people use that as a way, but we all react. When I get really nervous, I start laughing.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

But also, she was. It wasn't as I understand, a lady, she really knew.

[Adam Carolla]

Right.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Wasn't her best friend or anything. Somebody died. Okay.

[Adam Carolla]

The least likely person to kill that person. I don't know. What you have to do is have like a police force to go to. This is who. And no one raises their hand and goes, really? The fucking cute.

[Sam Tripoli]

How about when you bring her home to your parents? I started dating a new chick.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

A lot of baggage.

[Adam Carolla]

Who did the killing? That's the question, Andrew, you can look it up. I swear to God, it was like black guy with a record, like, rolls into Puskanesca town and no one says, well, maybe that's a guy we should take some looking at. That was the part about the first.

[Sam Tripoli]

We should call out all these people. I don't care what color, remember religion or sex or sexual orientation you are.

[Adam Carolla]

Well, they're not. See what they're not doing, what they're doing is something a little bit different. Part of it is to sort of racially whatever. But the other part of it is to get some pelts. Like you're.

[Sam Tripoli]

That's what he was saying.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, yeah. You're the DA and you got the Duke lacrosse kids. And you're like, I'm just gonna look good kids. I'm gonna get elevated by taking innocent 19 year olds and ruining their life.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yep.

[Adam Carolla]

Even though I have the information.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

But I became victim to it in Orange County.

[Adam Carolla]

Okay.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

There's a lady who wanted to be some big DA and I got jammed up.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah.

[Adam Carolla]

I can't believe.

[Sam Tripoli]

It can't be that. Nobody thinks it Might be that guy.

[Adam Carolla]

Sweaty dude. Sweaty dude. So what was the full story? He also had a criminal history, as I remember the thing as well, which is like, and was big and strong and looked like he could handle stabbing somebody. But you went with the waif model with no beef. Yeah, that just seems like a bizarre piece of fucking police, dude.

[Sam Tripoli]

Europe is lost, man. They don't know if they're coming or going anymore. Progressivism has just. Marxism has destroyed that whole continent.

[Adam Carolla]

So this guy's now in prison in Italy, I'm guessing for, you know, forever. And, and I didn't even know. It had to be like a weird slow motion nightmare for her.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah, everyone thinks you're guilty.

[Adam Carolla]

I know.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

And then there was so much of the sort of tabloid journalism where they made it very sexual and they, you know, she was constantly being assaulted in the press. It was something fun for that small town to get into.

[Sam Tripoli]

But also anything you did wrong in the past, they use as an indicator of your character. Like you could have had like a bad streak in your life where you, you made some mistakes and then you clean up and they're like, but she used to do this, she used to be a stripper. And you're like, well, that doesn't lead to murder. Yeah, she just was like desperate for money and had bam, you know, low self esteem. So it's just like, it's crazy how these things work out and you, you just catch the wrong guy at the wrong time.

[Adam Carolla]

So on October 7, days before Kircher's murder, that guy was arrested in Milan after breaking into a nursery school. He was found police, with an 11 inch knife and it was taken out of the school. So basically he broke into somewhere and he had a knife.

[Sam Tripoli]

Not just anywhere, kids, school.

[Adam Carolla]

Right. I'm saying, then he rolled into town and was partying with you guys. So maybe if.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Damn.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm just saying, if Charles Manson rolled in and was partying with the ladies and then someone got stuck, why are you arresting the 19 year old wave model? Why don't you take a look at a Charlie over here and when you watch the early Doc, you're like, oh, that guy did it. He's the criminal who came into town.

[Sam Tripoli]

Yeah, it's just political correctness just ruins people's. The way they look at the world. And it's just, it's idealism, it's like how they look at it, it's just, it's not reality. It's like this ideology that just this, it's just ridiculous.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

All right, well you guys Want to get darker? Here's a haunting video show the homosexual Khan allegedly. Kill it. I don't want to watch.

[Sam Tripoli]

Especially when she's so hot. It's like we lost a hot one.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

It's just a shame.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, that makes it.

[Sam Tripoli]

That could be two life terms for taking out a. I mean, our gene pool is already polluted now. You take out somebody we brought in, that's. That's like a first round draft crane.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

And got away from the war there only to be stabbed to death.

[Adam Carolla]

Type stabbing.

[Sam Tripoli]

But you, you know what? When you walk in, who am I not sitting by? Guy with crazy energy, dude, I'm moving way to the back or I'm moving way to the front.

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

Protect yourself at all times.

[Sam Tripoli]

Like, dude, political correctness should go out the door. And when you're analyzing your situation, where are the predators? Where are the threats? I wouldn't have sat anywhere near. And I'm not victim blaming her. She has a right to sit wherever she wants. But yeah, my daughter, I'll be like, if someone gives you jeepers crazy creepers, trust your instincts and get the fuck away from them.

[Adam Carolla]

Yeah, I feel that way with publicists, but I know what you're saying. It's a sad testimonial, but there's been so many instances of black men just cold cocking or stabbing or just coming up from behind and just sucker punching that. No, I would not feel comfortable in front of that young black man. Like, on the subject, subway, 99% chance he didn't do anything. But the problem is it got ruined by the Internet and too many people coming up behind people and sucker punching him. That look like that.

[Sam Tripoli]

Stereotypes are true for a reason, dude. And it's just the way it is. And when it comes to your life, you can be like, I'm gonna think politically correct. Nope. I remember there's a funny story I heard one time about these kids, these college kids, white kids, they just wanted to go, you know, they're like, we're gonna go buy drugs. And they go into the hood and they're like, I believe everybody. I love everybody. I don't judge it. And they got totally robbed by their. At gunpoint by their drug dealer. It's like all those retards who like, oh, I'm going to backpack through this Middle Eastern country.

[Adam Carolla]

I know, like, go to fucking hit. Hit the Muir Trail, man.

[Sam Tripoli]

Backpack through Florida. You got a safer chance than the Middle East.

[Adam Carolla]

All right, I'm gonna be in Albuquerque, New Mexico, September 26th, doing the chemo theater. And then the 27th, Flagstaff, Arizona, at the Orpheum Theater. And you go to AdamCroll.com for all the live shows. We're going to Vegas and Flappers and everywhere else. Sam's got his show at the Comedy Store. That'll be tonight. And also live shows in Chicago and Ventura County. The podcast Tinfoil Hat. A special coming out on YouTube on the 20th, I think think it is if I got that right. What do you got? Mayhem?

[Jason 'Mayhem' Miller]

No, the mayhem shows on YouTube. I probably tweeted about it.

[Adam Carolla]

So till next time, I am Crawford, Sam, Tripoli and Mayhem Miller Barbecue. Mahala.

[Sam Tripoli]

Pick up your phone and leave us.

[Adam Carolla]

A voicemail at 8 at 863-41744 and get tickets to see Adam Corolla. You can get them and [e-mail] Foreign.

[Sam Tripoli]

CBS hits are streaming free on Pluto TV for this month only. Stream full episodes of Matlock.

[Adam Carolla]

I'm a lawyer.

[Sponsor/Advertisement Voice]

Like the old TV show Fire Country.

[Sam Tripoli]

Elsbeth.

[Adam Carolla]

I do love a mystery.

[Sam Tripoli]

Ncisr Ch, Watson and ghosts.

[Adam Carolla]

What the hell? This is the most amazing sight I've never seen. All for free.

[Sam Tripoli]

The CBS shows you love this month only on Pluto tv. Stream now. Pain never. This September, CBS hits are streaming free on Pluto tv. I'm coming in hot for this month only. Stream full episodes of Matlock.

[Sponsor/Advertisement Voice]

I'm a lot like the old TV show Fire Country.

[Sam Tripoli]

Elsbeth. I do love a mystery, NCIS origins, Watson and ghosts.

[Adam Carolla]

What the hell? This is the most amazing sight I've never seen.

[Sam Tripoli]

All for free. The CBS shows you love this month only on Pluto tv. Stream now. Pain never.