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ADHD reWired
545 ADHD Growth Journeys An Alumna Coaching Experience and My Path towards Sustainable energy management - Group Registration Ends this Week
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In this episode of ADHD reWired, I’m pulling back the curtain on two intertwined journeys: my own path toward sustainability and the incredible growth story of Jessica, an alumna of our ADHD Coaching and Accountability Groups. As I’ve navigated my...
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Adhd Rewired Episode 545 Since 2014 this has been the podcast for ADHD adults who have really good intentions but a slightly wandering attention. I'm Eric Tivers. I'm a licensed Clinical Social Worker and an ADHD Certified Clinical Services Provider by training and a coach by design. I am your host and I have adhd. ADHD Rewired is more than just a podcast. We are a community. Visit us@adhd Rewired.com to learn more about our award winning coaching and accountability groups. One on One Coaching One on One Therapy if you are in Illinois Adult Study hall, our membership community for Virtual Co working, sign up for our monthly live Q&As and get additional resources including any links mentioned on today's show. You can also support us on Patreon and sign up for our email newsletter all@adhd rewired.com we are wired for connection and you are not alone. And if this is your first time listening, welcome home. Remember to hit, subscribe or follow on your podcast app so you never miss an episode. We know that starting is the hardest part, so let's get started. Hey there ADHD Rewired listeners. It's Eric. If you've been wondering why new episodes haven't been dropping as often, let me start by saying thank you for sticking with me. Here's the deal. As an ADHDer and entrepreneur, I used to juggle as many balls as I could because, well, let's face it, that's what so many of us ADHDers do. We take on more thinking that if we can just go faster, harder or better, we can keep it all in the air. And for a while, it worked. Until it didn't. Some of those balls, they were on fire. And when you chuckle balls on fire for too long, you get burned. I know that feeling all too well. And I'm guessing you might too. The overwhelm, the burnout, the frustration of trying so hard but feeling like it's never enough. Sound familiar? That's why I'm making changes. You know, my word for the year is sustainability. I'm stepping away from the chaos, setting boundaries, stopping when I'm tired and focusing on what matters most. Recharging my energy so I can keep showing up in the ways that work both for me and so I can continue working for you for so many years to come. While new episodes might be coming out slower, I got something exciting to share with you that can help you start your year with more clarity and balance. If you've been Listening to the podcast for a while, you've heard the voices of many of our coaching group members. Share their learnings, takeaways and experiences during our final group session that, with the members permission, we gratefully share in our testimonials. And I actually have a really unique one that I want you to hear which comes from a member of our fall session who reached out to me after the last session to ask if she could share some more thoughts later on and she actually did. What she shared with me was more an audio journal about her experience in group and with her permission, I'm going to share that with you in just a moment. But first I want to make sure that you know that our winter coaching and accountability groups start on January 30th and registration is happening right now. We started last week and eight people have already said yes to taking charge of their adhd. But here's the thing, this registration cycle is short. It started last week and it ends this week. Why so short? Well, historically most people sign up at our kickoff events, which was last week, and our last one or two registration events, which is this week. So I've cut out the stuff in the middle. Let's call this a data driven experiment in energy management. So if you're like many of those who join us, it's possible that you've been thinking about joining us for a while now. Whether you are new to the podcast, new to ADHD, or even wanting to join for some time, but your life has been a juggling act with balls on fire. If you're committed to making real changes in your life to live a healthier, more balanced, more self compassionate life where you learn better productivity strategies that work for you without sacrificing your well being, Come join us for our winter sessions. So what's new for our 39th season? The program is now eight weeks instead of 10, making it easier to commit and finish strong. Instead of rushing through our yearly planning, which we did during the 10 week version of the program, you'll get on demand access to our deep dive into yearly planning so you can go at your own pace. After over 10 years of running this program and improving it every season, one thing I know for sure is that less really is more. By simplifying and focusing on what really matters most, we're helping ADHD brains like yours build systems that actually stick or stick longer, or how to build the resilience when your system falls apart so you can get back up more quickly. So with our final registration events on Wednesday and Thursday of this week with only one section that's filling up pretty quickly. You might want to know how do you get started? You'll need to go to coachingrewired.com but how about I tell you more about how to get started with your pre registration steps after we hear from Jessica, who joined us last season and shared this really nice audio journal for you to hear? Go to the website coachingrewired.com and get your name on the interest list. Once you confirm your email, you'll get access to our pre registration page. I'll have more information about registration after.
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We hear from Jessica I decided to join this group because I was stuck in trying to make progress in completing my PhD. I was burnt out and feeling like a failure, frankly. I hadn't made substantial progress on my dissertation in months and was having trouble making myself do any kind of consistent desk work. I realized I needed help to get unstuck and I also realized that I wanted a different type of support and accountability structure than what I could get from my existing family, friends and work and school networks. I just didn't feel comfortable asking for what I needed from those relationships. Before this group, I was fluttering my days away. I was having a really hard time putting down entertainment media, audiobooks, netflix, podcasts, etc. To do the desk work that I needed to do to make progress on my dissertation and with my graduate assistantship. The more I engaged in these kinds of numbing activities, the less I got done and the more I fell behind and the more anxious I became about my progress, the more resistance I felt when I was about attempting to tackle the work and the more tempting it was to engage in those numbing activities. And so while I was getting plenty of sleep, I wasn't getting any regular exercise. I didn't have any consistent routines and I noticed that I was really starting to isolate myself socially because I was embarrassed about the conversations of oh, how well is the PhD going? And when I wasn't able to say that I was making progress, it just became really disheartening. This group has been so helpful and rewarding. The structure of the coaching program really worked well for me. If you're wanting to sign up for this program, be aware that the group is really intensive. In addition to the five plus hours a week that you'll spend in coaching and the accountability team meetings, you'll also want to set aside time for the homework when it's there, practicing and implementing the skills that you're learning, the daily check ins with your small accountability teams, and providing support to the accountability team members and for participating in the online community. The coaching sessions themselves can also be pretty intellectually and emotionally intensive. And even though some of the more intense sessions were some of my favorite sessions, I would often need a break afterwards before I could, you know, think about trying to get back to work. I really benefited from the intensiveness in the program and the depth of the community level of interaction helps to facilitate. It felt honestly like a jumpstart for my life or a re jump start for my life, perhaps helping me to get out of the rut that I was in. In particular, I love being part of an accountability team. It's done more for my motivation than anything I've tried in years. You know, I. I've tried in the past to try to do accountability check ins and things like that with family or supervisors, but there's always been that fear of judgment or letting someone down in a way that is going to really impact your relationship. So being part of an accountability team where their only stake in your performance is wanting to see you do well, has been just invaluable. So it has all the benefits, but without any of the downsides of a lot of other. With the weekly one thing check ins and the daily top three check ins, it gives you practice in prioritizing and other skills that we learned throughout the program. It was really a safe space where we could get curious together about the issues that we, ourselves and our group members were facing. It was so nice to be able to reach out for encouragement or support or check ins. There was really this sense of camaraderie where you're motivated to show up for, for the others in your group and in that process you're showing up for yourself. I can't tell you how many times where I was having a tough day or was having a hard time getting on track. And I had asked earlier in the day for maybe an accountability check in and someone would send me a message on the mighty network saying hey, how is this going? And just that pause to be able to stop and ask yourself questions about if things weren't going so well and what, what could I do to do things better, to get back on track? That was really helpful and also to celebrate when things were going well. My biggest takeaway from the group is probably the importance of weekly planning and time blocking and doing so in a way that was first off, based on data that I had gathered about how long things actually take me as opposed to how long I think they should take. So being realistic instead of judgmental or often overly optimistic about my time and how long things actually take and taking into account in this time, blocking my energy and willpower levels and not trying to squeeze too much really tough stuff into any one particular day or week and giving myself time with large enough blocks to get into a flow state and then being able to judge my expectations for what I can get done in a certain day based on the amount of time that I could spend and being able to tailor the tasks that I would do on certain days to that. I learned a lot more about self care and the importance of that and working on replacing some of my old numbing habits. I've started doing almost daily walks and scheduling dedicated time with friends on a more regular basis. The physical activity really helps me focus and the time with friends helps to stave off the loneliness and recharge my social battery. I've started replacing some of those numbing habits with more productive break activities such as nonfiction podcasts relating to my field of study and listening to those over breakfast as opposed to reaching for a story that I then have trouble putting down. I've also really enjoyed once a week the meditations. Prior to group I had no idea that would be something that I might gravitate towards. I had always thought of meditations as being extremely boring, but I really learned to appreciate it as a tool for emotional regulation and trying to overcome the I don't want us. I'm probably most proud of the work that I put in helping to organize my A team. My role in the group was the quote group leader. So making sure that helping to lead the meetings and then using the skills that I had developed in leading those meetings, I put together a book club for the one thing and being able to use the skills that I had developed in leading our team meetings, in making sure that meeting went smoothly was something I was really proud of. The two most meaningful moments to me were probably the reading of the Dear ADHD letters, the bonding over shared challenges, and also just the outpouring of support from all of the other members just meant so much. Knowing that you're not in it alone and that there are other people out there dealing with similar things and it really helped bring us together. And then also the bucket list conversations and seeing a lot of times opportunities for overlap and thinking about how the relationship and community that we built over this eight weeks can go forward and the having that group of like minded and similar neurodivergent folks that get you and that you could have fun going to a cruise to Iceland with that was a really meaningful experience, to have that community and to have ways of continuing that community past the coaching group. When I think about success now, I'm really trying to think about it in terms of thriving and finding ways to work with instead of fighting against my neurodivergence. I think a big part of that is going to be finding cultivating an environment where that thriving is possible and instead of trying to judge it by what I feel like an academic should be, it's being able to bring my own unique take to that and redefine that role in a place and in a way that works for me and in which I can be fulfilled and happy. If you're thinking about joining this group, in addition to knowing that it is an intensive program and probably should think about trying to treat it like a part time job, being curious and really trying to think about the learner mindset and being willing to suspend your judgments of yourself and instead of asking yourself what's wrong with me? Asking yourself what do I need right now? What's getting in my way? What would help me get beyond this? Who can I reach out to for help? Questions that will move you forward and will open up possibilities and I would strongly recommend this program to anybody with adhd. Thank you so much Eric.
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Thank you Jessica. You know, I hope you were able to hear some of yourself and Jessica's experience and feel that there is good reason for hope. Because if you can do our program, it really does help. Are you Ready to start adhding different differently? Go to coachingrewired.com to get in our interest list so you can start pre registering. Our pre registration process is designed to help you figure out if this program is a good fit for you. You'll have to first watch a quick 15 minute video that explains the whole program. Then you'll take a short quiz about what you just learned and then you'll send me a 45 second video video answering a few questions Now I know some of you see the video requirement and get stuck there. So here's why the video from you matters. It gives me a glimpse of who you are and there's an opportunity to show that you can overcome that vulnerable feeling of putting yourself out there. Because that's what we want in group growth minded ADHDers who aren't afraid to be vulnerable. Ready to take that step? Go to coachingrewired.com to pre register today or click on the pre registration links you've already gotten in your emails from me. Spots are filling up fast and the deadline is coming up this week. Join us Wednesday, January 8th at 12pm Pacific 3 Eastern or Thursday, January 9th if space is still available. And that one is at 10am Pacific 1 Eastern. And that information is all on the website. Enrollment is 14.99 with 3 and 6 month payment plans available now. If those dates have passed because this is a podcast and episodes live on forever, check the website to see if we still have spots left or how you can join us. I am so grateful to have you a part of this community and I can't wait to see some of you you in this next group. In the meantime, if hearing this today was helpful for you in any way, you can let me know that by leaving a review on any podcast app that accepts reviews. And if you think it would be helpful for someone you know, please consider sharing a link to this episode with them. And thank you so much for listening. I hope you all had a really nice holiday season and a happy new Year. More episodes are coming as energy permits. Learn more about all the things we're doing from our coaching groups to our adult study hall coworking community where our yearly planning sessions are available to all members on demand, to our Patreon community, to our live Q&As. Learn about all of it at ADHD Rewired.com Stay beautiful, stay weird, and remember, your value isn't measured by how much you check off to do. List. Together, let's challenge the internalized ableism that tells us we have to fit into a world that wasn't built with us in mind. And let's start creating lives and systems that truly work for us. We'll catch you next time.