Podcast
ADHD reWired
Hosted by Eric Tivers, LCSW, ADHD-CCSP · EN
The podcast for adults with ADHD. Hear stories, learn strategies, and get great productivity tips as we talk about the real-life struggles and what it takes to achieve success. Host, Eric Tivers, LCSW, is a psychotherapist, coach and entrepreneur (with ADHD) in private practice. Eric interviews a variety of guests. Many are people just like yourself, as well professionals, entrepreneurs, and ADHD experts.
27episodes
Episodes
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Future Coaching Group Members ONLY?
Yesterday00:10:56Tap to summarizeThis is not a typical ADHD reWired episode. This is a special, time-sensitive episode for listeners who are considering joining the next season of ADHD reWired Coaching & Accountability Groups. If you've been thinking, "I need more structure," "I can't keep doing this alone," or "I know what to do, but I'm struggling to follow through," this episode is for you. In this short announcement episode, Eric explains: Who ADHD reWired Coaching & Accountability Groups are for Why structure works better when it comes with support, repetition, and accountability What makes this group different from a self-paced course or passive learning experience How pre-registration works Why completing pre-registration soon matters if you want to attend one of the final registration events ADHD reWired Coaching & Accountability Groups is an intensive 8-week coaching and accountability program for adults with ADHD. The program includes group coaching three times per week, accountability teams starting in Week 3, daily top-3 priority check-ins, practical systems, peer support, and a whole lot of "Oh thank goodness, it's not just me." Registration is time-sensitive, and pre-registration is required before attending a registration event. Start here: Learn more and begin pre-registration at coachingrewired.com Links Mentioned ADHD reWired Coaching & Accountability Groups https://www.coachingrewired.com Start Pre-Registration https://www.adhdrewired.com/registration3steps/ ADHD reWired Website https://www.adhdrewired.com Adult Study Hall Virtual Coworking Community https://www.adultstudyhall.com Support ADHD reWired on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/adhdrewired
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The Desire Gap: ADHD, Sex, and Mismatched Libido with Laura Jurgens EP 563
2w ago01:00:27Summary readyEpisode topic: ADHD, sex, desire discrepancy, intimacy, communication, kink, queerness, polyamory, and what happens when libido doesn't match in relationships. Content note: This episode includes candid adult conversation about sex, desire, libido, kink, dating apps, polyamory, and sexual communication. Episode Summary What happens when one partner wants sex more than the other? What if ADHD affects libido in both directions? And what if "just do it" is actually some of the worst advice out there? In this episode, Eric is joined by Laura Jurgens, a dual-certified master relationship and intimacy coach, desire and arousal specialist, and host of The Desire Gap podcast. Laura helps individuals and couples create more authentic sexual connection, including when one or both partners are neurodivergent. Eric and Laura get into a candid, shame-free conversation about ADHD, sex, mismatched libido, desire discrepancies, rejection sensitivity, sensory needs, communication, and why so many people struggle to talk openly about what they actually want. Laura explains why desire differences are incredibly common in long-term relationships, why obligation sex can create resentment and shut down libido, and how ADHD can shape both high and low desire. She also shares how people can begin reconnecting with their bodies, practicing self-attunement, and communicating more clearly with partners. The conversation also explores sex positivity, kink positivity, queer dating, bisexuality, polyamory, ethical non-monogamy, and the importance of honest, embodied consent. This episode is frank, playful, personal, and deeply human. In This Episode, You'll Hear About Why desire discrepancy is common in long-term relationships How ADHD can contribute to both high libido and low libido Why "just do it" is terrible advice for mismatched desire The difference between sex for connection and sex for nervous system regulation How obligation sex can lead to resentment, shutdown, pain, or sexual dysfunction Why a partner can start to feel like a "tool" or "medication" when sex becomes self-regulation The role of dopamine, novelty, and hyperfocus in ADHD sexuality Why some ADHDers struggle to get out of their heads and into their bodies How stress, burnout, and nervous system activation can shut down libido Why self-attunement is a key starting point for intimacy How alexithymia can complicate emotional and sexual communication What "sex positive" and "kink positive" can actually mean Why embodied consent matters more than intellectual "I guess this is fine" consent How kink communities can model explicit communication and negotiation The risks of opening a relationship when the relationship is already disconnected Why polyamory requires a high level of trust, communication, and self-awareness Dating while bisexual, queer, neurodivergent, or exploring new relational identities How to disclose needs and patterns without using ADHD as a "get out of jail free" card Why communicating about withdrawal, burnout, and alone time matters in relationships Notable Moments / Quote Pulls "Obligation sex is the worst possible advice." "If you are trying to manage your partner's feelings with your body, that is a one-way ticket to resentment town." "Sex can become the way an ADHDer gets into their body and out of their head." "Your partner starts feeling like a tool or a medication rather than a person you authentically want to connect with." "Compatibility doesn't mean there are no differences. It means there are differences you can navigate." "Do I love the sex I'm having? That's a question a lot of people aren't even asking themselves." "Practice with the kitten to play with the tiger." "Don't yuck on someone else's yum." "You don't have to be evangelically polyamorous." Guest Bio Laura Jurgens is a dual-certified master relationship and intimacy coach and host of The Desire Gap podcast. She is a desire and arousal specialist who helps individuals and couples discover authentic sexual connection, including when one or both partners are neurodivergent. Her approach helps people release shame, shed relationship anxiety, and build confidence through more effective communication. Her work is play-based, practical, inclusive, trauma-informed, and grounded in current research. Laura is a former university professor with a PhD in biological sciences, with certifications from the Somatica Institute, The Life Coach School, and the NeuroAffective Touch Institute. Learn more about Laura at laurajurgens.com and listen to The Desire Gap podcast. Resources & Links Learn more about Laura Jurgens: laurajurgens.com Listen to Laura's podcast: The Desire Gap Learn more about ADHD reWired Coaching & Accountability Groups: coachingrewired.com Learn more about ADHD reWired: adhdrewired.com Join Adult Study Hall, our virtual coworking community: adultstudyhall.com Support the show on Patreon: patreon.com/adhdrewired Sponsor / Program Mention Registration is open for the next season of ADHD reWired Coaching & Accountability Groups. This is our intensive coaching and accountability program for ADHD adults who want more structure, support, follow-through, and connection. Learn more and start pre-registration at: coachingrewired.com
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ADHD reWired Live Q and A April 2026 ep 562
4w ago01:07:20Summary readyIn this live Q&A episode, Eric Tivers and ADHD reWired coaches Brian Entler and Kristin Marts answer listener questions about the overlap between ADHD and autism (AuDHD), and how to better understand your brain through both coaching and therapy. They explore how coaching and therapy serve different—but complementary—roles, especially when it comes to turning insight into action. You'll hear practical examples of how to use each space effectively, whether you're job searching, working through burnout, or trying to follow through on what matters. Eric also breaks down the concept of monotropism—a lesser-known but powerful way to understand autistic attention—and how it differs from ADHD hyperfocus. Later in the episode, the conversation turns to late autism diagnosis, self-identification, and the emotional impact of finally understanding yourself through a new lens. Eric shares openly about his own diagnosis and how it's shaped his relationships, self-compassion, and recovery from burnout. They also tackle questions about: Why autism is often diagnosed earlier than ADHD in children How to advocate for your child when concerns are dismissed Auditory processing challenges and sensory sensitivity The growing conversation around self-diagnosis This is a wide-ranging, honest, and deeply validating conversation about what it means to better understand how your brain works—and what to do with that understanding. KEY TAKEAWAYS Coaching helps with execution and follow-through, while therapy focuses on emotional processing Monotropism explains long-term, topic-based focus often seen in autistic individuals Late autism diagnosis can lead to increased self-compassion and clarity Self-diagnosis can be valid when grounded in thoughtful research and reflection Sensory and auditory processing challenges are often context- and stress-dependent Advocacy is essential when concerns about children are dismissed
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Coaching Groups: Final Registration Events This Week (A Short Song)
Feb 1000:01:45Summary readyPre-registration for the ADHD reWired Coaching Groups is due Thursday. Registration events are happening Thursday and Friday. The next group starts next week. 👉 For exact dates, times, and next steps, go to: https://www.coachingrewired.com This episode includes a short, experimental song made with Suno Ai explaining the coaching groups. If you're listening after the registration window closes, future groups will be announced on the website.
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Doing It the Way Your Brain Actually Works (561)
Feb 500:42:34Summary readyWhat if the reason you haven't finished the thing you keep thinking about isn't motivation, discipline, or follow-through — but fit? In this episode, Eric is joined by Katherine Mutti Driscoll, PhD, an AuDHD coach, educator, and author, for a conversation that starts with writing a book and quickly becomes something much bigger: how neurodivergent adults actually get meaningful work done. They explore why so many ADHD and AuDHD adults carry "someday projects" for years, how structure (not willpower) turns intention into action, and why unmasking isn't just about identity — it's about designing systems that work with your nervous system instead of against it. Writing is the case study. Adaptation is the point. In This Episode, We Talk About Why motivation isn't the real problem for ADHD and AuDHD adults How an interest-based nervous system shapes creativity and follow-through The role of structure, deadlines, and external accountability in finishing big projects ADHD, autism, and the balance between novelty and predictability Unmasking your process and letting go of "normal" ways of working Why you don't have to love the process to do meaningful work Perfectionism, imposter syndrome, and surviving the one-star review Dictation, movement, printing drafts, and other non-traditional workflows How support, containers, and community make progress possible A Key Takeaway You don't need to become more disciplined. You need a container that fits. When the system works for your brain, the work has a chance to happen. About the Guest Katherine Mutti Driscoll, PhD is an AuDHD coach, educator, and author. She holds a PhD in education, is trained through the International ADHD Coach Training Center and Impact Parents, and is currently studying to become a mental health counselor. Katherine is the author of The ADHD Workbook for Teen Girls and is currently working on her second book focused on Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria. Website: https://catherinemuttidriscoll.com Book (The ADHD Workbook for Teen Girls, New Harbinger): https://www.newharbinger.com/9781648482809/the-adhd-workbook-for-teen-girls/ Resources & Links Mentioned ADHD reWired (podcast, resources, and programs): https://www.adhdrewired.com ADHD reWired Coaching & Accountability Groups: https://www.adhdrewired.com/arc Adult Study Hall (ADHD-friendly virtual coworking): https://www.adultstudyhall.com Internal Family Systems (IFS / parts work): https://ifs-institute.com Interest-Based Nervous System (ADDitude overview): https://www.additudemag.com/interest-based-adhd-nervous-system/
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560 How to Finish Anything with Paulette Perhach
Jan 2200:41:51Summary readyIf you've ever had a week where your intentions were solid… and your follow-through vanished into the void, you're not alone. In this episode, Eric is joined by writer, teacher, and ADHD coach Paulette Perhach, who shares the FINISH framework: a simple, ADHD-friendly approach to actually completing projects, building consistency, and getting unstuck. Paulette's take is refreshingly honest: ADHD can feel like the superpower and the kryptonite at the same time. She talks about getting diagnosed at 38, learning to ask for accommodations without shame, and building systems that support creative work… even when your brain fights you every step of the way. This conversation is part practical strategy, part nervous-system-friendly encouragement, and very "you're not broken, you're under-supported." ✅ In This Episode, You'll Learn: Why ADHD brains often need "fake stakes" (engineered urgency) to follow through How to break big goals into small increments that create momentum The importance of nixing distractions (without relying on willpower) How to protect hyperfocus and use it intentionally instead of accidentally Why community and body doubling are so powerful for ADHD How self-compassion becomes a real strategy, not just a nice idea What to do when you're having a "bad brain day" and can't access your usual tools 🧠 The FINISH Framework (Six Elements to Finish Anything) Paulette breaks down the acronym FINISH: F — Fake Stakes ADHD motivation often needs emotional urgency. Fake stakes are "real enough" accountability: deadlines, commitments, public accountability, or putting something on the calendar that makes it harder to ghost your own goal. I — Increment Instead of "write the book," aim for 500 words a day. Small daily targets create dopamine, progress, and trust. N — Nix Distractions This is about designing your environment so you don't have to wrestle your brain all day long. Tools like app blockers (Freedom App) and external reminders can support focus. I — Immerse Make space to hyperfocus on purpose by doing the planning/admin work ahead of time. Paulette calls this a weekly "writer's refresh" to calm the nervous system and reduce background stress. S — Share Community matters. Body doubling matters. Doing things with other people (even silently) can dramatically increase follow-through. H — Hype This one is about self-talk and emotional regulation. Exercise, meditation, and kindness toward yourself aren't luxuries, they're performance tools for ADHD brains. 🔥 Standout Moments Paulette's line: "My version of consistency is that I get back up every time I fall down." The difference between luxury vs. accommodation, especially when traveling Eric's take on requesting extra time to board flights and why it can be a legitimate accommodation The idea that shame doesn't create change (it creates shutdown) Why ADHD-friendly success often looks like iteration, not perfection 🎧 ADHD-Friendly Takeaway If your brain only gives you one usable step today, let it be this: Pick the smallest thread you can hang onto to stay connected to the work. Open the document. Read one paragraph. Write one sentence. Show up for one increment. That counts. That builds trust. 👤 About Paulette Perhach Paulette Perhach is a writer, teacher, and ADHD coach who helps writers and creatives build sustainable, fulfilling creative lives. Her work has appeared in major outlets, and she leads writing and meditation sessions through her community programs. 🔗 Resources Mentioned Paulette Perhach (website): paulperhach.com Writer's Mission Control Center: thewritermissioncontrolcenter.com Freedom App (distraction blocking) ✅ Work With Eric / Join the Community Want structure that actually works for your ADHD brain? ADHD reWired Coaching & Accountability Groups: coachingrewired.com Winter 2026 Groups Forming Now! -- February 5-6 | April 2-3Registration EventsThursday, January 15, 22, 29 at 4:30 PM PT / 7:30 PM ETFriday, January 16, 23, 30 at 7:30 AM PT / 11:30 AM ET Adult Study Hall (Virtual Coworking): adultstudyhall.com Support the podcast on Patreon: patreon.com/adhdrewired
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559 ADHD & AuDHD Burnout: Why Community & Accountability Still Matter Personal Updates & Listener Questions
Jan 1400:48:33Summary readyIn the final Q&A of 2025, Eric is joined by ADHD reWired coach Brian for a candid, intimate conversation about ADHD, AuDHD, burnout recovery, unmasking, grief, and what it looks like to rebuild momentum without torching your nervous system in the process. They answer listener questions ranging from "what I wish I knew before my autism diagnosis" to "what burnout actually looks like," and they zoom out to something simple but powerful: community and accountability aren't "nice extras," they're often the difference between knowing what helps and actually doing it. Also: a listener puts Eric in the hot seat about getting back to pickleball… and it turns into real-time accountability, immediate action, and a follow-up update that he's now going 3–4 times a week. In this episode, we cover Personal updates: burnout recovery, nervous system capacity, and Eric's autism diagnosis Why AuDHD can increase burnout risk (and why recovery can take longer than you expect) Brian's reflections on exploring autism and recognizing long-term burnout patterns Unmasking: what it really means (beyond "coming out") and how it impacts relationships The balance between honoring your needs while still caring about impact on others Grief and burnout: how loss affects the nervous system, energy, and expectations What burnout looks like in real life: apathy, feeling rudderless, skill regression, and "my usual motivators aren't working" Eric's working theme for the year: attunement (listening to self, body, and capacity) Favorite AI tools right now: thinking partner, planning support, and everyday practical use Autism assessment options in Chicago (including what worked for Eric) A playful-but-serious accountability moment that leads to real behavior change Listener Q&A highlights What are your favorite AI tools right now? Eric and Brian share how they're using ChatGPT in everyday life and personal/professional planning, including using AI to organize thoughts, support self-reflection, help with decisions, and even analyze photos for practical problem-solving. What do you wish you'd known before being diagnosed autistic? Eric talks about high-masking autism, and how repeated success can quietly raise internal expectations year after year… until the nervous system taps out. How has grief impacted your nervous system and burnout? Eric reflects on losing his dad (and grandmother), how grief shows up unexpectedly, and choosing to let grief be grief rather than trying to "bounce back" on a schedule. What does burnout look like for you? Eric describes burnout as apathy, feeling rudderless, needing far more recovery time, anxiety no longer activating last-minute productivity, and struggling to do even the helpful things (like exercise/pickleball). What's the smallest step I can take to get back into pickleball? A listener challenges Eric to take one tiny step… and it becomes immediate action, membership sign-up, and later consistency. Resources mentioned ADHD reWired (podcast, programs, and more): https://www.adhdrewired.com Learn about Coaching & Accountability Groups: https://www.coachingrewired.com Adult Study Hall (virtual coworking + community): https://www.adultstudyhall.com Support the show on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/adhdrewired Prosper Health (online autism evaluations): https://www.prosperhealth.io Devon Price (author + clinician mentioned in the episode): https://www.drdevonprice.com Key takeaway Burnout recovery isn't linear. For AuDHD folks especially, the cycle of "I feel better → I go full throttle → I crash again" can repeat fast. This episode is a reminder that community and accountability aren't just support… they're infrastructure. Next live Q&A March 10 at 12:30 PM Central
Summary🔔 Final Call: Fall Coaching Groups Start Oct 23rd
Oct 1100:01:27Summary readyJoin us! Hey, it’s Eric. So, uh — I wasn’t actually planning to record this… but I wanted to hop on for a minute, because this is it. We’ve got our last two registration events this week before our Fall ADHD reWired Coaching and Accountability Groups begin. They’re happening Tuesday, October 14th, and Friday, October 17th — and after that, doors close until next year. Over the past ten years, we’ve worked with more than 1,200 ADHDers — helping folks build systems that actually stick… and the resilience to bounce back when they don’t. Because let’s be honest — sometimes they don’t. That’s kind of the point, right? Learning how to keep showing up, even when your brain makes that hard. If you’ve been listening for a while and thinking, “Maybe someday I’ll do that,” — maybe this is that someday. And if you can’t make one of the registration events, it’s okay — once you finish pre-registration, you can also schedule a 1:1 registration call with me. Our Fall groups start October 23rd, so now’s the time to jump in. Just head over to coachingrewired.com to get started. Again, that’s coachingrewired.com. Hope I’ll see you soon.
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When "Fine" Keeps Us Stuck: A Reflection on My Dad, Masking, and Adapting ep 558
Oct 600:14:36Summary ready"I'm Fine": What My Dad Taught Me About Resisting Help On August 14th, my dad passed away. In the weeks since, I've been reflecting on his life, his humor, his resilience — and his signature phrase: "I'm fine." He said it when he was hooked up to machines in the hospital. He said it when he was on the roof cleaning gutters, even though his balance was shot. And most of the time, he wasn't fine at all. In this episode, I share some of the lessons I learned from my dad about adapting — and about the cost of resisting it. From the adult trike he never would have bought for himself, to the senior living community he resisted but came to love, my dad's story is a mirror for the ways we all struggle with change, masking, and accepting support. I also talk about my own journey: being diagnosed with ADHD at 19, and more recently, with autism — a diagnosis that really came into focus during a season of burnout. Like my dad, I've had to learn that determination isn't enough. Saying "I'm fine" isn't enough. What matters is adapting — and allowing ourselves to receive help when we need it. If you've ever caught yourself saying "I'm fine" when you're not, this one's for you. In This Episode The phrase my dad used that wasn't always true — "I'm fine." How his resistance to adapting shaped my understanding of masking. The trike that gave him joy he wouldn't have chosen for himself. Why moving into a senior living community became one of the best decisions he never wanted to make. What his struggles taught me about ADHD, autism, burnout, and learning to adapt. Resources & Links Learn more about ADHD reWired Coaching & Accountability Groups: coachingrewired.com Join our virtual co-working community: adultstudyhall.com Support the podcast on Patreon: patreon.com/adhdrewired
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Building Systems that work for you (and not the other way around) with Stephanie Blake - Ep 557
Sep 3000:41:44Summary ready🧠 Episode Summary: Are you building a business (or a life) that supports your life—or one that runs you into the ground? In this episode of ADHD reWired, Eric Tivers is joined by business systems coach and automation strategist Stephanie Blake. Diagnosed with ADHD later in life, Stephanie shares how simplifying her business, embracing structure, and getting honest about burnout helped her reclaim her energy and build a business that works for her, not the other way around. They talk about the unique ways ADHD brains thrive with streamlined systems, why too many tools can be a trap, and how authenticity and self-awareness fuel sustainable success. If you've ever felt overwhelmed trying to do all the things, this episode is your permission slip to do less—better. You'll also hear tips for where to start with automation, how to avoid shiny object syndrome, and why consistency matters more than complexity. ⏱️ Timestamps & Topics: 00:00 – Intro 02:02 – Stephanie's story: diagnosis, business, and burnout 06:11 – "Simplify to scale": the ADHD-friendly approach to business 11:58 – Tools and systems that actually help (and what to ditch) 18:05 – Where to start with automation (without breaking your brain) 21:42 – The myth of doing it all—and why solo doesn't mean alone 26:39 – What's behind our addiction to new tools 30:14 – The power of community and authenticity in building your brand 35:20 – Why revisiting your systems is a must, not a maybe 38:17 – Final thoughts: automate the right things, at the right time 40:36 – Learn more from Stephanie + Fall Coaching Groups are open! 👤 Guest Bio: Stephanie Blake is the founder of the Simple Business School and Simple Business Suites. She helps entrepreneurs scale to six figures and beyond by simplifying their business systems, automating strategically, and building offers that align with their values. As a mom, a CEO, and an ADHDer, Stephanie believes in doing business your way—and building something that lasts. 🌐 Learn more at: theblakecollective.com 📱 Instagram: @theblakecollective 🔧 Tools & Resources Mentioned: ClickUp – Project Management Airtable – Databases / Organizing Everything Zapier – Automation StreamYard – Live Streaming Platform 🚀 Learn More & Take Action 🧭 Fall 2025 Coaching Groups are open for registration! If you're ready to finally get support, structure, and accountability that works for your ADHD brain, then come join us. Join our next Registration Event: 📅 Friday, October 3rd at 12pm Central OR 📅 Thursday, October 9th at 10am Central October 3rd: $1699 October 9th (Late Reg): $1899 📆 3- and 6-month payment plans available! 🔗 Start your pre-registration now at www.coachingrewired.com 🌐 Learn more about: Adult Study Hall (Virtual co-working): www.adultstudyhall.com Support us on Patreon: patreon.com/adhdrewired 🎧 Listen & Share If this episode helped you feel less alone or gave you a new perspective on how to run your business or your life with ADHD, share it with a friend—or on social! Use #ADHDreWired to join the conversation.
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