ADHD reWired, Episode 560: "How to Finish Anything with Paulette Perhach"

Air Date: January 22, 2026
Host: Eric Tivers, LCSW, ADHD-CCSP
Guest: Paulette Perhach

Episode Overview

In this episode, Eric Tivers welcomes writer, coach, and New York Times contributor Paulette Perhach to discuss her framework for finishing creative projects—especially for adults with ADHD. Paulette shares the "FINISH" acronym, detailing six essential elements to overcome distraction, procrastination, and overwhelm. Together, they candidly explore ADHD realities, effective strategies, embracing accommodations, and cultivating self-compassion while pursuing creative success.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

Paulette’s ADHD Journey and Embracing Accommodations

• Diagnosis Story (03:31–08:09): Paulette was diagnosed at 38, transforming her self-understanding and freeing her from long-held shame about productivity struggles.
  • “My version of consistency is that I get back up every time I fall down.” (03:31, Paulette)
• Paulette reflects on differentiating between luxury and necessary accommodations, describing travel and scheduling challenges, and the need to advocate for herself unapologetically.
  • “Somebody actually said that to you?” (08:52, Eric)
  • “I have ADHD. I get myself the accommodations I need.” (08:09, Paulette)

The Reality of ADHD Struggles & Creative Work

• Paulette and Eric exchange anecdotes about the constant need to develop systems and self-forgiveness for ongoing challenges (travel, planning, finances). Both strongly advocate for self-compassion and seeking out supportive environments.
  • “Excel is the brain I was born without.” (12:31, Paulette)

The "FINISH" Framework: Six Elements to Help You Complete Anything

Paulette introduces her FINISH system (14:37), designed specifically for ADHD brains and creative work:

1. Fake Stakes (F)

• Description: Engineer urgency and emotional investment using external motivators—deadlines, accountability partners, public commitments, monetary investment.
  • “You need to feel an emotion about whatever you’re doing. If you don’t have an answer to the question ‘what would happen if I didn’t write today?’, what are you probably going to do? …You’re not going to write today.” (13:36, Paulette)
  • “It’s another form of sort of engineered urgency.” (15:02, Eric)
• Action: Set up fake but meaningful deadlines, join groups, or tell others your goal.

2. Increment (I)

• Description: Break tasks down to tiny, manageable chunks and focus on incremental progress, especially on hard days.
  • “I need to edit and rewrite 500 words a day... what that does is it gives you that little dopamine hit every single day of, like, bing, I did it.” (15:10, Paulette)
  • “What is the smallest thread you can hang onto to still be touching your work? Sometimes it’s literally, open the document.” (16:15, Paulette)
• Action: Set micro-goals, even if just reading a page or opening your project.

3. Nix (N)

• Description: Aggressively eliminate distractions and excess priorities, both digital (apps like Freedom) and environmental (e.g., removing a TV).
  • “I don’t have a TV in my house... I watch TV on my laptop. It is sad and not that fun.” (16:50, Paulette)
  • “What is the one thing you are doing right now? ...Everything else can be later.” (17:51, Paulette)
• Strategies:
  • Use tech blockers (Freedom)
  • Limit screens or clutter
  • Sticky notes to externalize what you’re NOT doing (per Eric and Ellen Brown, 18:46)

4. Immerse (I)

• Description: Deliberately create conditions for deep focus—including routines like a weekly “Writer’s Refresh” admin session or designating 'cave time’ to minimize worry about other obligations.
  • “I have a weekly meeting with myself to just do the admin, the things that are important but not urgent.” (23:33, Paulette)
  • “When I’ve done [the planning], then I know that at 7am... I am safe to truly immerse in that hyperfocus.” (24:09, Paulette)
• Tip: On bad brain days, scale back routine to essentials and prioritize key tasks (26:56).

5. Share (S)

• Description: Leverage community, body-doubling, and group accountability. Sharing both struggles and wins reduces shame, increases motivation, and fosters belonging.
  • “We know with ADHD that body doubling is huge.” (27:08, Paulette)
  • “It feels sacred...to have someone come to you and be like, can I be, like, 10 notches more human than we’re allowed to be normally?” (30:48, Paulette)
• Action: Join co-working or accountability groups, find writing buddies, or share progress/struggles with others.

6. Hype (H)

• Description: Actively manage emotional and mental state—embrace self-compassion, positive self-talk, and do things (exercise, meditation) that restore energy and hope.
  • “This is about managing your mental and emotional state and hyping yourself back up.” (32:03, Paulette)
  • “You just need to have self compassion. You just need to, like, love yourself. And I just remember, like, crying even harder and being like, I can’t.” (33:03, Paulette)
  • “The thought that we don’t deserve self-compassion is a thought that is basically...a version of shame. And when we are carrying shame, it is virtually impossible to move forward.” (33:54, Eric)

Memorable Quotes & Powerful Moments

• On Redefining Consistency:
  • “My version of consistency is that I get back up every time I fall down.” (03:31, Paulette)
• On Accommodations:
  • “Is this a luxury or is this an accommodation?” (09:08, Paulette)
• On Group Support:
  • “When you love someone who has the same struggles as you, it helps you love yourself in those struggles.” (36:18, Paulette)
• On Hyperfocus & Systems:
  • “Excel is the brain I was born without.” (12:31, Paulette)
• On Self-Compassion:
  • “I can still love myself and I can pick myself up and do the best that I can in that moment.” (34:23, Eric)
• On Community:
  • “Everyone take your bras off...here, your ADHD’s your boobs, the mask is the bra.” (30:09, Paulette)
  • “The feeling of being alone and feeling like you’re the only one that sucks...” (37:06, Eric)

Additional Resources & Tools

• Paulette’s Writing Software:
  Writer’s Mission Control Center — Organizes writing projects, submissions, ideas, and goals in one ADHD-friendly place.
  “It calms my nervous system...having it all there, being able to calm and trust that you have everything in one place.” (38:53, Paulette)

• Paulette’s Website:
  pauletteperhatch.com for coaching, community, and resources.

• ADHD reWired Adult Study Hall:
  adultstudyhall.com — virtual co-working sessions and dedicated writing times.

Episode Structure & Timestamps

| Time | Segment/Topic | |-------------|--------------------------------------| | 00:00–03:31 | Paulette’s background and ADHD story | | 03:31–08:09 | Diagnosis, shifting from shame to acceptance | | 08:09–13:22 | Navigating accommodations, travel struggles, self-talk | | 13:36–19:52 | The FINISH acronym (Fake Stakes, Increment, Nix) | | 23:33–26:56 | Immerse: Creating conditions for hyperfocus, admin routines | | 27:08–31:19 | Share: Power of community and body-doubling | | 32:03–36:18 | Hype: Self-compassion and emotional self-regulation | | 36:18–39:34 | Tools and resources (Mission Control Center, communities) | | 39:41–41:29 | Closing encouragement on self-trust and ADHD consistency |

Closing Thoughts

Eric closes with a message of radical acceptance, emphasizing that real consistency for ADHD brains means getting back up and trying again. The FINISH framework isn’t about perfection—it’s about creating manageable systems, finding community, and being kind to yourself through the inevitable ups and downs.

“If all you do today is one small increment, one tiny step...let that count. Because those are the steps that rebuild self-trust.” (41:25, Eric)

For more details or to connect with Paulette, visit pauletteperhatch.com. For ADHD-specific coaching, gocoworking or support, check out adhdrewired.com and adultstudyhall.com.

Summary prepared for ADHD adults, writers, and creatives seeking practical, affirming strategies for finishing what matters most.