Episode Overview

Podcast: ADHD with Jenna Free
Episode: 34 – "ADHD at Work: Putting Work in Its Place (The Severance Episode)"
Host: Jenna Free
Date: November 17, 2025

Jenna Free delves into the all-too-familiar struggle of maintaining work-life boundaries as an adult with ADHD. Connecting regulation—not time management or productivity hacks—to achieving sustainable work-life separation, Jenna explores the concept with a nod to the TV show Severance, examining the chronic urgency and overwhelm that often pervades work for neurodivergent people. The episode is a compassionate, insightful guide to understanding why "working to get peace later" doesn't work—and the shift necessary to truly feel off-the-clock.

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. The Blurred Boundary: Why Work Takes Over

• Severance Concept as Analogy:
  Jenna references the TV show Severance, in which employees' consciousness is split between work and personal life, to illustrate the lack of boundaries so many ADHDers experience (01:05).
• Work Bleeding Into Life:
  For ADHDers, especially those who are self-employed or lack traditional work hours, the separation between work and personal time often disappears.
• Dysregulation at the Root:
  Jenna identifies the key issue as not the ADHD brain itself, but chronic nervous system dysregulation—remaining in a state of fight-or-flight, which blurs boundaries between rest and work (04:20).

2. The Myth of "Getting Ahead" to Earn Rest

• Chasing Peace Through Overwork:
  Many ADHDers work past their limits, believing, "If I work enough now, I'll finally be able to relax." But this state perpetuates dysregulation: "You will never work yourself in a dysregulated state to regulation" (08:22).
• Vacation Doesn't Solve It:
  Even time off isn't restful if the underlying dysregulation isn’t addressed—many return to work and instantly revert to old stress patterns.

3. The Signs You've Lost "Work-Life Severance"

• Physical vs. Mental Location:
  • At work, but thinking about home (or vice versa).
  • Always mentally working, even when resting.
• Body Signals:
  • Restlessness, inability to relax, constant tension even when "off the clock".
  • Soothing with unhealthy coping (excessive scrolling, TV, etc.).
• Irritability and Fatigue:
  Jenna asserts, "We could be more relaxed at work and still do a really good job. It does not have to be this exhausting" (14:03).

4. The ADHD Regulation Method: The Three Pillars

Jenna introduces her ADHD Regulation approach, focused on three types of regulation:

A. Regulating the Nervous System (Body)

• Start with simple cues: slow your walk, check body tension, notice your breath.
• Relaxation is not laziness: "Running around like a chicken with your head cut off does not mean you're a good worker... it's just your body thinking you're in danger." (17:10)

B. Regulating Thoughts & Beliefs

• Examine beliefs driving urgency:
  • “If I don’t stay on top of this, everything will fall apart.”
  • “If I relax for one second, I’m going to drown.”
• Challenge self-fulfilling prophecies:
  Jenna illustrates, "What if the water's shallow? What if you could put your feet down and stand up?" (24:22)
• Shift towards new beliefs:
  • “I can handle things as they come.”
  • “Slow and steady wins the race” (with an ADHD-friendly caveat).

C. Regulating Behavior: Moving Beyond Extremes

• Observe your patterns: are you cycling between all-or-nothing work habits?
• Seek consistency:
  • "Am I functioning on Monday in a way I could function all week?"
  • Set boundaries: e.g., quitting at a set time, removing Slack/email from your phone.
• "These boundaries are retraining your system to do things consistently and think more long-term than to hammer stuff out..." (36:01)

5. Experiencing Regulation: Jenna's Personal Story

• Jenna shares her own former struggles, describing a period when work dominated her mind constantly—"I open my eyes and I'm thinking about work. I'm going to sleep and I'm thinking about work" (39:51).
• Key Turning Point:
  Therapy helped, but true change came with regulation work; boundaries became natural rather than forced.
• For Jenna, “It does not have to be rigid to be effective. But you do need the regulation—the internal ability to turn it off. When I want to work, I can work. When I want rest, I can rest. That is the biggest skill, especially if you’re self-employed” (42:31).

6. Imagining a Regulated Work-Life Balance

• Picture ending the day and “actually feeling done. Not because your list is complete, but because you’re at peace with what you did" (45:07).
• Resting before work starts, not running your to-do list as you drink your coffee.
• This isn't about perfection or productivity; it's about nervous system safety—being able to stop, to rest, to play, to work, all as needed.
• "Regulation will also help you stop confusing work and a to do list with danger because I know you probably experience both sides, right?" (47:19)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On urgency and overworking:
  “When we're in this dysregulated state, everything feels urgent. And when everything feels urgent, we can't stop thinking about work.” (05:24)
• On the ineffectiveness of working harder for peace:
  “You will never work yourself in a dysregulated state to regulation. But I think that's what the brain is thinking, right? If I work hard enough, ...then I'll be able to detach. Then I'll be able to relax. But I'm sure you've seen that that is not the case..." (08:27)
• On regulation as the missing ingredient:
  “It is not a rest you need. It is not a break you need... It is regulation that we need that allows us to do things differently.” (10:57)
• Metaphor for beliefs and behavior:
  “If you're doggy paddling and working my ass off is what keeps me above water. When you could just put your feet down, stand up and go, oh, this also keeps me above water. And it's a hell of a lot easier.” (26:32)
• On boundaries and behavioral change:
  “We want to create more balanced behavior, more balanced energy exertion... You'd be amazed at how much more productive you'd be if you showed up consistently all five days than showing up intensely for two and kind of halfway for three.” (33:15)
• Jenna’s personal experience:
  “I went and I went, look, I open my eyes and I'm thinking about work. I'm going to sleep and I'm thinking about work. I don't want to be this way. This is so painful. I'm always anxious. And I knew in my heart of hearts that was not going to make me more successful.” (39:51)
• On realistic expectations and hope:
  “I truly feel good about myself. And what I've done every single night, my head goes on the pillow. Not because I'm perfect and I'm always really productive, but because I am at peace and I know I'm always doing my best.” (45:22)

Important Timestamps

• 00:00 – Introduction and the "Severance" concept
• 04:20 – Dysregulation and its real-life effects
• 08:22 – The futility of working for future rest
• 14:03 – Signs you’ve lost work-life separation
• 17:10 – Regulation, starting with the body
• 24:22 – Examining (and challenging) urgency beliefs
• 33:15 – Regulating behavioral extremes; finding consistency
• 36:01 – Boundary-setting and digital detox
• 39:51 – Jenna’s personal struggle and turning point
• 42:31 – Boundaries in practice; non-rigid but intentional
• 45:07 – Envisioning regulated work-rest balance
• 47:19 – Regulation is the key to peace (not perfection)

Tone & Takeaways

Jenna’s style is warm, direct, and deeply empathetic. She skillfully blends personal anecdote, science-backed insight, and practical reframing, continually steering ADHDers away from self-blame and useless productivity hacks toward compassion and nervous system safety. The central message: Real work-life balance for ADHDers isn't achieved through intense overwork or rigid schemes, but through learning to regulate mind, body, and behavior—to recognize when you’re in urgency, and to gently lead yourself into a new way of being.

For listeners:
If you struggle to mentally leave work at work, often find yourself anxious or exhausted, or suspect you’re caught in the “do more to feel better” loop, this episode points to regulation—not more effort—as your path to real relief and a happier, more sustainable life.