443 | The Holidays DON’T Have to Be Stressful and Exhausting. Holiday Resets: Refreshing Your Mind, Home & Energy This Season

Summary

Podcast Summary: Affirmations for Black Girls

Host: Tyra The Creative
Episode 443 | The Holidays DON’T Have to Be Stressful and Exhausting. Holiday Resets: Refreshing Your Mind, Home & Energy This Season
Date: December 1, 2025

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Main Theme

This episode centers on navigating the emotional, mental, and physical demands of the holiday season while reclaiming joy, rest, and intentionality. Tyra The Creative encourages listeners to perform “holiday resets”—small but powerful acts that rejuvenate the mind, home, and energy—so that the holidays become a season of restoration, not exhaustion.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Reframing the Holiday Narrative (03:12 – 05:36)

• Tyra reflects on the exhausting aspects of the holiday season: managing group chats, gift buying, attending every gathering, and especially the emotional labor of family interactions, which tends to leave her “spiritually exhausted.”

• The holidays weren’t meant to drain us; they should ground and comfort us, providing “a big, warm fuzzy hug” (03:55).

• This year, Tyra chooses peace, rest, and being present with herself above all else so she can show up authentically for others too.

  “I’m deciding to choose peace like it’s the first gift on my Christmas list. Amen. I’m choosing rest like it is a requirement… And I’m choosing to be present with myself before I’m even starting to be present with anybody else.” (04:06)

2. Weekly Affirmation Practice (06:35 – 10:19)

• Tyra introduces the affirmation: “My joy begins with the choices I make today.”

• She emphasizes that joy is “built on the choices that we make leading up to [the holidays],” such as setting boundaries, choosing rest over forcing traditions, or allowing yourself moments of pause.

• Encourages listeners to envision what joy could look like if it started with everyday choices.

  “Those tiny decisions, the ones that we make before the overwhelm starts to hit us, are the ones that set the tone for our whole holiday experience.” (09:27)

3. The Necessity of Mental Resets (12:31 – 20:44)

• Tyra discusses sensory overload during the holidays and how constant noise and movement can deplete mental bandwidth.

• A mental reset, she says, doesn’t need to be fancy: it’s about giving your mind breathing room. This could be:

  • Journaling—writing out thoughts with no judgment (14:02)
  • Mindful walks—being present in nature, a practice she picked up after a difficult breakup, which has become a ritual for mental clarity (15:56)
  • Guilt-free naps—letting your mind and body find real rest (18:24)

• Rest is not a luxury, but “necessary for daily function. It is the foundation for showing up as your best and softest self.” (19:24)

  “A simple walk would slow my brain down and get my body out of that space where I am ruminating and feeling stuck…” (17:19)

4. Social Energy and Setting Boundaries (26:17 – 29:24)

• Highlights the trap of overcommitting to social events and the importance of intentional boundaries.

• A social reset can involve declining invitations, seeking quiet time before group events, or being selective with your company.

  “It doesn’t have to be anything crazy… Maybe your social reset is saying no to a distant friend’s holiday party or taking a quiet afternoon for yourself before your family all gets together…” (27:05)

• Tyra shares her own learning process—prioritizing events and people that truly matter so the holidays feel lighter and more joyful.

5. Resetting Your Physical Space (29:56 – 36:05)

• The environment contributes greatly to our holiday state of mind.

• Suggestions for a home reset include:

  • Small decorating tweaks, adding personal touches, or claiming a cozy space (31:15)
  • Creating new, playful rituals (33:02), e.g., breakfast for dinner or changing up traditional meals and activities
  • Intentionally seeking out comfort in temporary spaces when away from home, such as bringing a favorite candle or a throw from home to family visits (32:14)

• Emphasizes the need for flexibility and making new memories, even in unfamiliar spaces.

  “Even when you’re not in your usual space, y’ all, you can carve out moments that feel intentional and that nourish your soul… Create rituals that bring you joy no matter where you are.” (36:04)

6. Embracing the Slow Magic of the Season (37:06 – 39:34)

• Tyra encourages listeners to “notice and observe”: enjoy small pleasures, let the season’s natural invitations to slow down take hold.

• Slowing down isn’t about laziness; it’s choosing to “show up fully as your truest self.” (38:04)

  “When you slow down, you’re not doing less. You are making space for more—more presence, more clarity, more joy, more of the small unassuming magic that makes this season feel real.” (38:49)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Affirmation of the Week:

  “My joy begins with the choices I make today.” (06:50)

• On mental load:

  “So a mental reset doesn’t have to be anything fancy at all, y’ all. It’s really just giving your thoughts some breathing room… What am I carrying right now in my mental that I don’t actually have to?” (13:16)

• On saying no:

  “This season, I want you to focus on people who truly matter to you. You don’t have to see everybody and do everything. Prioritize quality over quantity.” (29:47)

• On temporary spaces:

  “My mom moved into her new house back in 2018, so I’ve never lived in the house that I stay at now... I have to claim a little piece of it for myself. That candle, that cozy throw pillow, or the little corner that I make cozy for me…” (32:14)

• On intentional living:

  “The key to all of this is flexibility. Even when you’re not in your usual space, y’ all, you can carve out moments that feel intentional and that nourish your soul.” (36:04)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• 04:06: Choosing peace, rest, and presence before all else
• 06:35: Affirmation of the week: “My joy begins with the choices I make today”
• 12:31: The importance of mental resets during the holidays
• 15:56: Importance of walks for mental clarity/post-breakup healing story
• 18:24: Taking guilt-free naps for mental rest
• 26:17: Social resets—setting boundaries and focusing energy intentionally
• 29:56: Resetting your home and environment for the holidays
• 36:04: The importance of flexibility and creating new rituals
• 38:49: The transformative power of slowing down and being intentional

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Bonus: Fun Closing Segment – Holiday Hypothetical (41:44 – 47:42)

Tyra shares a whimsical “Holiday Hypothetical” about curating a perfect $50 stocking, listing her favorite go-to items: Nerds Clusters (candy), fun socks, Burt’s Bees lip balm, and the Sol de Janeiro perfume.

“If you don’t get nothing else out of my stocking, baby, you need to get this and the Burt’s Bees, cuz we need to make sure that our lips is moisturized.” (47:15)

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Takeaways for Listeners

• Holiday overwhelm is real, but not inevitable.
  Through intentional mental, social, and physical resets, your holidays can be restful, grounding, and full of real joy.
• Small, intentional choices make the biggest difference.
  Setting boundaries, creating cozy spaces, and honoring your need for rest are powerful acts of self-love.
• You deserve holidays that restore you—not ones you have to recover from.

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Tone:
Heartfelt, nurturing, real, and gently humorous throughout. Tyra is encouraging and practical, always bringing back the focus to self-worth, presence, and personal joy.

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For More:
Listen to the full episode or check out Tyra’s show notes and social channels for detailed resources, the giveaway, and her curated holiday favorites list.

Transcript

[Tyra]

Y'. All.

Hosting my daddy in LA last week taught me one thing. My apartment was not as holiday ready as I thought it was. Nothing will expose your space faster than hosting a parent. Okay? So I did what any responsible girl would do. I grabbed my laptop and I ran straight to Wayfair and baby.

They understood the assignment as they always do.

Wayfair truly has everything when you're doing that last minute holiday sprucing and trying to finish your gift list at the same time. Amen. I'm talking about bedding and linens for the guest room, functional furnit for the living room, kitchen essentials for hosting dinner, storage solutions for seasonal decor, kids room updates. All of it.

Y'.

All. You can shop by vibe, by room, by budget, okay? And I think you'll find something for your every need this season. One of my friends just refreshed her bedroom with a Wayfair headboard and a cozy comforter set. It was fast shipping, it was great quality, and apparently the price was too good to pass up.

I need to ask her for the.

Details on that, so maybe it might.

Be time for me to do a bedroom refresh too. What do y' all think?

What do y' all think? Any boo? Get last minute holiday essentials, gifts for your loved ones and decor to celebrate the holidays. For way less. Head to Wayfair.com right now to shop all things home. That's W-A-Y-F-A-I-R.com Wayfair Every style, every home. Okay. Does your brain just refuse to clock.

Out at the end of the day? Like you're trying to relax but your.

Thoughts are still doing overtime?

Yeah, that's me. Okay?

I'm learning that when my mind is moving a mile a minute, sometimes the best thing I can do is pause.

Breathe and reach for a little support.

To slow everything down. Calm is the number one app for sleep and meditation and it's here to help you feel better. They've got guided meditations to help with stress, focus and build real deal healthy habits. But my personal favorite, y', all, the sleep stories and the calming music that helped me knock out fast and naturally.

They even have expert LED talks on.

Everything from grief to self esteem to nurturing healthy relationships. It's a great support system resource for your mind, your heart and your whole lifestyle. No wonder Calm has over 2 million 5 star reviews.

Okay, now I have a challenge for y'. All.

Download the Calm app and tonight before you go to bed, listen to the sleep story.

Daddy's front porch.

It's narrated by Tiana. Yes, Tiana from the Princess and the Frog. And it instantly transports you to New Orleans. This is one of my favorite sleep stories as a Southern girl from Louisiana, and it instantly calms me, so I.

Really wanted to share that with you guys.

So calm your mind.

Change your life.

Calm has an exclusive offer just for listeners of our show. Get 40% off a Palm Premium subscription at calm.com affirmations this is an amazing value.

Y' all.

Go to C-A-L-M.com affirmations for 40% off unlimited access to Calm's entire library. Calm.com affirmations and tell Calm you heard about them from me.

Every year around this time, my brain feels like it's running a marathon that has absolutely no finish line. Between holding the group chats together, reminding everybody of the plans that we all.

Made, making sure that gifts actually get.

Bought, and trying to show up for people who sometimes don't show up for us. And y', all, don't even get me started on the emotional labor of navigating family dynamics without losing your absolute mind. Especially if you've been living away from home for a while. And by the time that the holidays actually arrive, like Christmas Day, we're tired.

Not the cute oh, I need a.

Nap tired, but more like spiritually exhausted. But the wild part about all of this is the holidays were never designed to drain us. They were meant to ground us, to comfort us, like a big, warm fuzzy hug, to bring us closer to joy, not anxiety or stress. So this year, I'm reclaiming that. I'm deciding to choose peace like it's the first gift on my Christmas list. Amen. I'm choosing rest like it is a requirement, like it actually is. And I'm choosing to be present with myself before I'm even starting to be present with anybody else. Because we deserve holidays that restore us, that replenish us and overfill our cups, not ones that we have to recover from. What is going on.

Beautiful people, you are listening to the.

Affirmations for Black Girls podcast where we.

Focus on personal growth and cultivating a.

Healthy relationship with ourselves.

I am your host, Tyra, the creative.

Actress, content creator, and mental health enthusiast. And y', all, it is holiday time. If you are watching on our YouTube channel, are you watching a video? Happy Holidays. The holidays. This is what I will say about this. The holidays always stir something up in me. It's like a mix of excitement, tenderness, and, if we're really being honest, a.

Little bit of emotional whiplash.

Sometimes. So this year, I am personally spending Thanksgiving away from home. But I am headed back to Louisiana for Christmas. And even with that, I've noticed over the years how easy it is to let the chaos of the season take over my life. One minute I am soaking in the twinkly lights, and the next minute I'm swept up in the nostalgia of what Christmas used to feel like to me as a kid. Or I'm just running myself completely raggedy, trying to squeeze months worth of memories into a few days with family because I live so far away. But here's the truth that I keep coming back to. No matter what's happening around us, there is always room for a soft reset. A moment to breathe, a moment to check in with ourselves, a moment to decide what our peace looks like before the world tells us how we should be feeling. And it's wild how once we do that, the holidays start to meet us where we are instead of pulling us in a million different directions, creating a holiday season that feels grounding, comforting, and aligned with the person that we are now. So before we jump all the way into that, we have to get into our affirmation of the week. So this week's affirmation is. My joy begins with the choices I make today. Let's go ahead and drop in, y'. All. My joy begins with the choices that I make today. My joy begins with the choices I make today. My joy begins with the choices I make today. My joy begins with the choices I make today. My joy begins with the choices I make today. My joy begins with the choices I make today. My joy begins with the choices I make today. And let's go ahead and say it one last time together. Really envision what your joy looks like, what those choices you have to make look like. My joy begins with the choices I make today. Oh, y', all, y', all, y'. All. I love this affirmation because when you really sit with that notion of my joy begins with the choices that I make today, I'm reminded that joy is not some big magical moment that drops out of the sky during the holidays. And we've talked about joy a lot on the podcast, but it's built on the choices that we make leading up to them, specifically the holidays and this regard. The choice to slow down instead of rushing. The choice to say no when our spirit is tired. The choice to create boundaries that protect our peace. The choice to not force traditions that don't fit our life or our lifestyle anymore. Even the choice to rest without guilt or to make space for the things that actually pour back into us. Those tiny decisions, the ones that we make before the overwhelm starts to hit us, are the ones that set the tone for our whole holiday experience. They're what allow us to show up softer, lighter, and more present. And not just for other people, but also for ourselves. And sometimes I think I personally forget this holiday season is for me too.

Every holiday season is for me too.

And I deserve to enjoy it just as much as everybody else. And all of that begins with the choices that I decide to make today. Y', all, it is giveaway time.

Happy holidays, beautiful people. It's your girl. Tyra and I have some super exciting news. We are hosting our very first Affirmations for Black Girls Holiday giveaway and it is officially live. So we are going to have three.

Winners at this time.

Our first place winner will snag a super, super cute Coach bag.

Y', all, y' all know how I feel about Coach.

Okay? It's a Savannah small carry all and I got it in the color stone, which is a really pretty khaki color. I really wanted it to be, you know, a bag that could be your everyday bag, right? Plus I also have some extra goodies.

In there as well.

And you can go to our Instagram.

To see what I've included. I created a little video to show you everything that's in the giveaway basket.

And we will also have two runner ups who will get $30 gift cards.

To our Merv shop.

So you can shop till you drop, baby. The giveaway ends on December 10, 2025 at 11:59pm PST. That's Pacific Standard Time and we'll be picking the winners bright and early on December 11th. The winners will only be contacted through the email that you use to enter the giveaway. So make sure that it's an email that you check faithfully because if we do not hear back from you within.

24 hours, we will have to move on to the next winner.

Okay, there are tons of ways to enter. You can follow us on Instagram, Tik Tok, or even subscribe to the show on Apple podcast. Everything is done through the link that I have included down below in the show notes of this episode. There are more actions that you can complete than what I just mentioned and the more actions that you do, the more interest you get. So you can go to Tyra, the creative.com podcast that is the link to the giveaway. Or you can click the link down below in the show notes. So go ahead and enter and make this holiday a little extra special for you. Good luck, everybody.

Mental resets are absolutely crucial during the holidays. When everything, especially when everything feels extra loud and fast paced, the holidays can feel like a full on sensory overload. There's the lights, there's the music, there's the plans, there's the group text, there's the family dynamics, there's the new spaces or even old spaces that you haven't.

Been to in years.

And all of it is moving at once. And when everything is so loud and fast paced like that, it's easy for our minds to get pulled in all of those directions. And that's why a mental reset is so crucial, especially for someone like me who lives far away from home and has to jump back into being home for the holidays with a bunch of people. So a mental reset doesn't have to be anything fancy at all, y'. All. It's really just giving your thoughts some breathing room. It's asking yourself, what's been taking up the most mental real estate lately? And more importantly, what am I carrying right now in my mental that I don't actually have to? For me, sometimes it's the guilt about not checking in with everybody or trying to cram a whole month of togetherness into one weekend when I'm at home. And y', all, I do this so bad. The other day I actually had to tell myself, tyra, stop. You cannot try to plan all of these events and things in the week that you'll be home for Christmas or the week that I'll be home before Christmas. So specifically what I was thinking about, I was like, oh, I want to do all of these things. I want to decorate these things. I want to do this with my mama, I want to do this with my brother. I want to do this with my daddy. I'm going home on December 15th. That is not enough time to do all the things that I was thinking to do. But I think I get so excited because throughout the year I start having all of these ideas like, like, oh, I want to do this with my mama, or I want to do this with my brother, my daddy, whatever. It would be so fun. I really want to experience this with them. And when the opportunity actually does present itself, which is only in like two week stints at the most at a time, I tend to cram out of the essence of time. But on the other hand, there are also other times where most of my mental space is being taken up by old holiday memories. And I'm constantly replaying them, especially the Ones that no longer serve me. Like, for example, the Christmases that I have spent with ex boyfriends. And sometimes I tend to ruminate over those types of things. But I say all of this to say whatever it is, commandeering your mental space. Give yourself permission to pause and acknowledge it. And because that's the first step to your reset. And mental resets can look a lot of different ways depending on what you need. Like I said, they can be simple. Maybe it's journaling, and that's just letting your brain spill out onto paper without judgment from yourself. I know sometimes I will try to censor myself even when I'm journaling, and I'm trying to get myself out of that because why should I censor myself in an intimate moment with myself? You know what I mean? But I like to journal while. Especially if I'm away from home, I like to journal while I am doing something, drinking something, or doing something warm and cozy, like drinking a cup of tea or even ice cold Celsius. Sometimes if I need a little razzle dazzle, I also like to turn on like some lo fi music. You guys know I love listening to lo fi because it makes the act of journaling feel nurturing instead of like another task. I actually have this entire routine set up on my. I have a lot of routines, by the way, but I have a routine set up on my Alexa where I just tell her, hey, Alexa, I'm working. And it will instantly set the mood for journaling or doing any deep work that I have on my to do list for the day. If you're not really the journaling type, maybe your mental reset takes place by like a walk outside, even if it's just a simple walk around your block. And I talk about this so often, but I feel like there are not enough people out there who truly understand the power of a walk in nature. Feeling the air on your skin, noticing the world move at its own pace, can be such a gentle reminder that life doesn't have to be in constant motion. And like I've said before on the podcast, I started doing these little mindful walks back with my friend Alexis in 2022. Remember, that was after the really bad breakup that I had, and it has truly become a ritual for me. So back when I broke up with my last boyfriend, I was really hurt, y', all. And my therapist told me, you need to call one of your friends to get you out the house because you've been in the house for a week. So I called Alexis and I was like, hey, this was going on. She's like, why didn't you tell me? And I just broke down. And she was like, it's okay. And I forgot what we did after that, but we got together shortly after that. But then every morning she would text me and say, hey, do you want.

To go on a walk?

And at first I was like, all right, let's take a walk, whatever. Like, I didn't. I didn't know the power of a walk at that time. And it got to the point where I was looking forward to these walks, and they weren't anything crazy. We literally walk around our apartment in this the same little pattern. It takes about 15, 20 minutes, depending on how fast, how slow we walk. And it just really set the tone for my day. And I'm so grateful for her doing that for me because I go to the gym, I do all of these things. But the act of walking outside and really stepping away from your day to day has done wonders for my mental space. Because especially during that time when we started doing this, that breakup was taking up so much of my mental and emotional bandwidth, and I constantly felt clogged and I felt blocked. But a simple walk would slow my brain down and get my body out of that space where I am ruminating and feeling stuck in my emotions or in my. My mental. And if you're like, okay, I already take walks and you want to try something new, when it comes to a mental reset, then it could also be taking a nap without guilt, y'. All. I love nap time. Just letting your body and find rest because they need it. I do this often after, like a long workday. Like, if I'm recording a lot of podcast episodes or, you know, doing a lot of brain heavy tasks, I typically will take a nap because my brain needs it. I will turn on my Calm app. Y' all know I love calm. I will turn it on. I'll either either listen to, like, the rain sounds or any of the nature sounds, or if I'm feeling up to it, I will listen to one of the shorter sleep stories that I love. They just itch my brain so well and they're very soothing. I will listen to one of those and then I'll take me. I personally take long naps. I take like 30 minutes is the minimum nap for me. I know some people that take like 10 minute, 15 minute naps. I wish I could do that. But the space I am, the season I'm in in life right now is my brain is always in overdrive, and I need that time to come down before I can actually get into a very restful state. So I'm like 30 minutes is my minimum and I try to take, I'll take a 30 minute, 45 minute or up to an hour nap. And it is so good for me and my mental. But the entire point that I'm trying to make here is that mental that mental rest is not a luxury, y'. All. It is a necessity. It is necessary for daily function. It is the foundation for showing up as your best and softest self. The one who can actually enjoy the cookies that you baked for the holidays, the twinkling lights on the Christmas tree, and the laughter with your extended family and friends without feeling like your running a marathon just to survive the season. Because when we reset mentally, we create a space where joy and clarity can actually exist. And that is the real gift we can give ourselves this holiday season.

Okay, can I let y' all in on a little secret that you probably already know? I love giving a good gift. And honestly, it is for selfish reasons. But it's because. Because I get excited when I find a gift that feels super personal and perfect for the person that I'm giving it to.

Because one thing's for sure, I'm not.

About to show up empty handed or with something basic. Okay, now let me refresh y' all's.

Memory on Uncommon Goods before the holiday.

Season arrives because their site is packed with unique gifts that you will not see anywhere else. Now, I love planning ahead, so of course I started bookmarking some things that you would never find in a regular store. But what really stopped me dead in.

My tracks this time, y', all, as.

I was perusing on the site was the fact that Uncommon Goods has experiences.

That you can gift to your loved ones.

I'm talking classes, cooking workshops, crafting tastings, and all kinds of creative adventures. That's not just a gift, that's a memory.

Uncommon Goods has something for literally everybody.

From moms and dads to kids and teens, from book lovers, history buffs and die hard football fans to foodies and avid gardeners partners. You'll find thousands of new gift ideas that you won't find anywhere else. Plus, every time you shop, you're supporting independent artists and small businesses and they even give back $1 to a non profit partner of your choice. So shop early, have fun and cross some names off your list today. To get 15% off your next gift, go to UncommonGoods.com affirmations that's Uncommon Goods affirmations for 15% off off don't miss out on this limited time offer uncommon goods. We're all out of the ordinary. All right, y', all, picture this. It's the end of a long day. Your phone is finally on, do not disturb, the lights are low, and you've slipped into that version of yourself who actually prioritizes your rest. Maybe you're doing a little light stretching. Maybe you got your journal open. Maybe you curled up reading a book.

Or listening to an episode of the.

Podcast just fully in your soft girl era, right? The secret to a good nighttime routine is not just the candles and the.

Skin care and writing in your journal.

And all that stuff. It honestly is the mattress that you're ending the night on. And there is nothing quite like my Avocado Green mattress, y'.

All.

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Don'T really get a lot of hugs from people.

So my mattress hugs me in all the right ways, and I have not gotten such good nights of sleep in years.

I'm so glad that I got this mattress.

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Holidays always seem to come with extra social stuff, right? Like family dinners, work parties, gift exchanges, you name it, anything. And yes, connecting with people can be really nice, but overdoing it will leave you super duper drained. I see it every year. I experience it almost every year. We're running on fumes, moving from one obligation to the next, giving more and more and more and feeling like we have to check every box just to be present. And that's why the holidays are actually the perfect time to start practicing some boundaries and give yourself a little social reset as well. It's about being intentional with your energy and giving yourself permission to say yes to what matters to you and to say no to what doesn't or what you don't have time for. It doesn't have to be anything crazy. Crazy like blocking somebody phone number or ghosting people all together. Because I do say no to ghosting. We talked about that. But I do say yes to blocking if it becomes necessary. And if you have already set that boundary and you're like, okay, this is the final straw. But anyways, I digress on that. Maybe your social reset is saying things like that's a distant friend's friends holiday party or taking a quiet afternoon for yourself before your family all gets together so you can really muster up the strength. Strength. And I don't like to say the strength, but muster up the energy to be in those spaces.

Or even being picky about who you.

Spend your time with when you do go home for Christmas, and how you spend that time with those people that you decide to spend that time with. But the bottom line is, this season is supposed to refill you, not drain you. And this is also the perfect time to reflect on who truly deserves your attention this season by asking yourself, which gatherings energize me versus which ones drain me? Or who in my life really deserves an intentional connection with me this year? What boundaries will actually protect my peace? What do I need to stand firm in? What do I need to reconfigure in my life? Or am I saying yes because I want to? Or do I feel like I have to? You know, for me, personally, I've had to learn this the very hard way. A few years back, I was trying to make it to every single party, every single dinner, every single cookie exchange, bake, all the things for my family members. Because I'm a pastry chef. They don't get my cooking a lot. And I thought that I was being the good daughter, the good friend, the good host, the good pastry chef. But I ended up always, always. And I'm not over exaggerating. Always showing up tired, distracted, cranky, stressed, a little resentful, and not present in the mom. But once I started getting intentional about where I spend my energy, who I really wanted to see, what events actually mattered to me, the holidays felt lighter and I was happier. I could be present, I could laugh harder and actually enjoy my people instead of just running through a checklist. And don't get it twisted, y'.

All.

I can honestly say last year was the first year that I. I did this. And it felt amazing. And it's. It's definitely easier said than done. But here's my advice. This season, I want you to focus on people who truly matter to you. You don't have to see everybody and do everything. Prioritize quality over quantity. And a little gratitude can also go a long way. Like, even if you can't see the people, send them a text, drop them a note. DM somebody that you appreciate before the the year ends. Especially if you're not going to see them. Say that everybody got a lot of things going on and it's simple, but it makes both you and them feel seen. And that energy will carry you through the holidays in the most grounded way possible. The holidays are as much about our spaces as they are about our minds and our social lives. And just like we can reset mentally and socially, our homes or wherever we stand at for the Christmas season can benefit from a little reset, too. So it's about creating your calm, creating your joy and intentional energy in the spaces that we occupy, even if it's not our usual ones. Sometimes the smallest changes can make the biggest difference. So think about decorating in fresh or unexpected ways. Maybe it's rearranging the living room, bringing in some seasonal greenery or flowers. Like, I got my Christmas tree up already. Look at the time that I'm filming this. It is before Thanksgiving, but, baby, my Christmas tree is up, okay? Or adding little pops of color into your space. Even if you're not at your home or your apartment, like, when it is Christmas time, I'll be at my mama's house. You can still bring your own vibe. And you can maybe add a cozy throw or a small candle or even just a little corner where you can sip on your favorite holiday drink and feel grounded in the moment. Every year for Christmas, since I'm home for an extended period of time, I think this year I'll be home. I'll be home for a while this year for Christmas, and I'm excited. But when I'm home for an extended stay, I like to go to Bath and Body Works and buy a candle, one that I really like. That makes the space mine. Because fun fact, y', all, my mom moved into her new house back in 2018, so I've never lived in the house that I stay at now full time. My childhood home, we don't have that no more. And I've always been. I've always felt like I was a guest. And that's not to say that I feel uncomfortable there, but the furniture and everything in the bedroom that I stay at, when I go to my mama's house, it doesn't mean anything to me. So I have to figure out how to make it mine. So I have to claim a little piece of it for myself. That candle, that cozy throw pillow, or the little corner that I make cozy for me where I can sip on my hot chocolate or my tea. It's my little reset. It's my way of saying, even though I'm not in my space, I can still create moments of calm, joy and presence for me. And another way that you can reset that, like your home or your space, your physical surroundings, is maybe trying a new hot. Trying new holiday rituals. Maybe instead of a traditional Christmas tree, you create a small festive setup on your table or your countertop.

Or maybe you switch up the meals.

You don't even want to do Christmas food. Order Chinese food instead of pot roast or a turkey. Or maybe you try a new dessert.

Or have a cozy breakfast for dinner.

Situation, even if it's at your family's house. These little rituals can make the season feel playful, but also intentional. You can also shift how you spend your time at home or away. So instead of automatically staying all cooped up and watching movies all day, you could take that walk that we were talking about outside with your family, your partner or friends. Notice the lights that everybody put up, the crisp air, the quiet pockets of joy, or create a small, intentional activity in your temporary space. Journaling, crafting, or even just sipping tea in a cozy corner while everybody else is busy, busy. These mini resets allow you to slow down and reclaim little slices of calm no matter where you are. And one thing that I am super excited to do when I go back to my mama's house is cook breakfast outside on her patio, y', all, while everybody is at work. So I typically spend a lot of time home alone when I'm in Louisiana for Christmas, so that will be one of my pockets of peace in the morning, making my breakfast outside in my Christmas pajamas in the Louisiana December air. And I hope that it's actually cold. And one of my other favorite things to do while I'm home is small gestures of gratitude for the people that I'm staying with, which is my mama and now her husband. But in my case, it is my mom, like I just said. But it can be anybody that you're staying with, like leaving a note on somebody's door, making them a warm drink for me, packing my mama's lunch because she never packs her own lunch and I want her to eat or just saying something heartfelt to these people. These simple acts bring joy and connection without adding pressure to the situation. Now, of course, the classic stuff still works. Sipping on your hot chocolate, your eggnog, or even a seasonal latte from your favorite coffee shop. Meanwhile, y', all, I went to Badash Bakes. It's a coffee shop here in Pasadena, California. And I had the sweet potato matcha latte. And it was the most delicious thing that I had. And I really want to find another latte like that when I get to Louisiana. And they better prepare to be sick of me because I'm going and getting that thing every single day. I just feel like festive moments like that make the holidays for me. Now, we said the hot chocolate, the fun drinks, whatever, then there's Also journaling about your wins and your intentions for the new year, or wrapping gifts mindfully, maybe with some vibey lo fi music playing in the background. But the key to all of this is flexibility. Even when you're not in your usual space, y', all, you can carve out moments that feel intentional and that nourish your soul. So the goal is simple. Create rituals that bring you joy no.

Matter where you are.

Romanticize your life in this season and enjoy it. Because I will say this. This. You never know what twists and turns the next holiday season will hold. So shift things around. Try new things. Make small choices that do feel magical. Don't wait. Don't say, oh, well, I got next year. I can do it next year. Don't wait for that. Because it's these many resets, big or small, at home or away, that set the tone for a holiday that truly feels like it's yours. Christmas baby. The holidays have a rhythm that is all their own. Some of it is bright and sparkling, and some of it is messy and loud. And in the middle of all of that, there's this space where you can just notice and observe the laughter bouncing off the walls, the smell of your grandma cooking something yummy in the kitchen, the quiet moments when the entire house is still. It all adds up to a kind of Christmas magic if you let it. Here's the thing. The holidays were literally made for slowing down. I want you to think about it. It's the end of the year. Long breakfasts with your family, evenings spent sipping hot chocolate by the Christmas tree, walks to see lights, slow conversations over dinner, even the rituals themselves, like decorating and wrapping gifts or picking out a candle for your temporary space. They're all invitations to pause and pay attention. They remind us that life doesn't have to be a rush. That presence matters more than productivity. And being away from your own space can feel disorienting. But it also gives us permission to see things differently. You start to notice little textures, the little corners, little gestures that you might have overlooked at home. And in noticing or observing that, you create a kind of rhythm that's yours alone. A way to move through the season that feels lighter. It feels slower and more present. And slowing down does not mean you're lazy or that you're falling behind. Pausing and resting and carving out quiet moments for yourself. That is how you actually show up fully as your truest self. When you slow down, you're not doing less. You are making space for more.

More presence, more clarity, more joy, more.

Of the small unassuming magic that makes this season feel real. And there's a lot of power in that. Not in doing more, not in making things perfect, not in. In measuring up to any expectation, but in choosing how you want to show up in your own life, even if it's just in small, quiet ways. And that's what makes this season so comforting instead of chaotic, intentional instead of rushed. And if you can feel that, even if it's just for a little while, the holidays don't just pass by. They settle in with you in a way that feels real warm and truly yours.

So let me ask you guys a.

Couple of serious questions.

Do your joints feel older than you? And do you really know what's going on inside of your body? Yeah, me either, y'.

All.

Now y' all know. Whenever I go home to Louisiana, family time is everything to me. When we're all together, I'm always so grateful for that quality time. It always reminds me to take care of myself so that I can keep making memories with the people I love for years to come. And I'm ready to get even more serious about that. So I just learned about True Diagnostic and their True age plus True Health test, y'. All. This ain't nothing like a grade school test, okay? But the more research I do on it, the more I'm interested. Did you know that a single painless finger prick at home can lead you to over 180 personalized insights into your health and how you're aging? On one hand, True Health runs tests to look over 100 biomarkers, which is stuff like your vitamin levels and nutrient balance, your immune system, and even stuff like gut and cognitive health. On the other hand, True Age goes even deeper, y'.

All.

Their test shows your biological age, which.

Is the pace of your aging.

And it shows how important organs and systems like your heart, your brain, your liver, and your immune system are aging, which means I'm 30 years old, and my biological age could be more than 30, or it can even be less than 30 years old. And this test will help to show me where I'm at. So this is a full snapshot of how your body's really doing on the inside. And with an easy to read report and personalized recommendations, I honestly feel like this is a tool that can help me actually stay on top of my health and put energy into the right habits where I'm not just guessing all the time. So if you want to dig a little deeper and if you're serious about living healthier and longer, visit truediagnostic.com and use my code affirmations for 20 off your entire order or subscription. That's true. Diagnostic.com code affirmations for 20% off your future self will. Thank you. You.

Oh, y', all, you know what time it is? It is time for our fun closing segment. And today's closing segment is called Holiday Hypothetical. Okay, now, this is crazy. So I got this. Tyra B. Made this up for me. She gave me $50 to curate my perfect stocking. So she asked me what was stuffed inside. And it took me a minute to get this together because I was like, how am I going to decide what I'm gonna put in my stocking with only 50? Because inflation tariffs. Okay, anyways, I found some stuff, and I'm about to show it to y'. All. So this is my stocking, by the way. I've had this for a few years, but this is my one lonely stocking. One day, it'll have more stockings in my apartment. Okay, now, I'm super excited that we actually did this Christmas one because I wanted all of our Christmas episodes to.

Be a little more festive. So I hope you've been feeling the.

Festiveness of the episodes. There's a lot more where that came from, but. Okay, let's get into this stock. And I actually went ahead and stuffed it. So the first thing on my list, my favorite candy, y' all all, I got my Nerds clusters. Okay, now, y', all, these are to die for. They come in a lot of different. Not a lot of different. They have, like, another, like, a green pack. But, baby, this is one I like. And let me tell you something about these. Anytime I go out, like, if I'm going to a bar or anything like that, I don't drink a lot, and I don't smoke or do any. I don't do anything like that. All I need some candy in my purse. Okay, These Nerds clusters are like some Mentos or something. Like the strawberry Mentos, something like that. I love to have that in my purse. I could just pop them. You know what I'm saying? And a little gum.

I'm a candy girl.

I really am. So these were 2.99. Okay, what we got next? Next. Now, I just put one in here, but I actually found this, this set on Amazon. And all of this stuff that's in my stocking, I did link down below for y' all in the show notes if you wanted to grab any of it. But if you. Anyways, some socks. One thing about me, I'm going to gift socks in a stocking.

We did.

So we started doing stockings a couple years ago in, like, when I go home, my family and I gave my mama and my brother and my friend Demitri sometimes spends Christmas with us. He's one of my best friends from college. He lives in Louisiana. And I gave all of them socks. And they loved them. They were just like, some fun socks with, like, color or with, like, faces on them, all of all different colors. Colors. And my brother wears his faithfully. Okay. I wear mine. My mama will pull hers out every now and then. But I need to ask Dimitri if he'd be wearing his socks. I really do. I think he does because I think he does because he loves a good gift. But anyways, I have some socks. Fuzzy socks, fun socks, whatever they are. I would love to have those in a stocking. I feel like that's a great stocking stuff for. Because we always need socks. Meanwhile, the socks that I got on right now starting to get a little hole in them. And I'm getting so upset because they one of my favorite pairs.

Pairs.

But anyways, I linked like a four pack from Amazon, and they were 14.99. So the socks is 14.99 out of my $50. After that, y'. All. One thing about me, I'm gonna keep them lips moisturized honey. So I put some Burt's Bees into my stocking. Now this one that I'm showing y' all right here, it's a variety pack, but I ain't had that much money, so I couldn't afford the variety pack of the Burt's Bees. But I really wanted Burt's Bees. So I did one Burt's Bees. The sweet peach smells so good. And it was only 377 at Walmart. So I put that in my stocking as well. But in this little pack that I actually just bought, why I say so. It's holiday edition. And this one says, have you been naughty nice or a bit of spice? And each of the little vessels have naughty nice or a bit of spice on them. So nice list is sugar cookie. A bit of spice is the cinnamon Apple Crisp. And the naughty one says lump of coal. And it's vanilla. And I love all of these flavor. I keep saying flavors. I love all of these scents. And I love Burt's Bees. Yeah. This. You can never have too much moisturization for your lips. Okay. Especially during the. The winter time. The lips be crusty. The lips be super crusty. So burst bees377. And then my last thing, I, I definitely splurged on this, but I'm like, y', all, I gotta have this last thing. And that is my perfume, baby. Let me tell you something about this Soul de Janeiro, okay? This is their perfume. It is the. I don't even know how to say it. The Chosa 62, baby. All the girls come close. I need you to tap in because this, this will have your man eating you alive, okay? They gonna have to call the people to search for your body because you gonna be ate up up if you put this on your body. It is like this salted caramel, very yummy, gourmand scent. It has vanilla in there and it's just so warm and inviting. And y', all, I'm telling you, when I put this on, when I put this on, anyways, this is 28 and it is a travel size. I also have the full size bottle. I also have the body oil and I also have the body butter. What's that to you? It is tried and true. I didn't ran a lot of tests on this product, baby. This in the stocking. I like, literally, like if I were to do like a stocking stuffer thing with my friends, I would 100% get them the travel size of this. Cuz anytime my friends ask me. Oh, Ty. What?

What perfume?

What perfume? This is one of the ones that I tell them because it is very affordable and it smells so freaking good. It can be day to night scent so you can wear it at any time. I also wear it to bed. It's just so yummy, like literally. And every time I wear this, I get so many compliments from men on this scent. Sometimes I will mix this scent with one of my Joe Malone perfumes, but we ain't talking about that today. See, we can go into all of this stuff, but I'm telling you, y' all need to get this. It's linked down below. It is linked down below in the show notes. If you don't get nothing else out of my stocking, baby, you need to get this and the burst bees, cuz we need to make sure that our lips is moisturized. But anyways, the perfume was $28. So we got our nurse clusters, our socks, our burst be and our perfume. And that brought my total baby to 49.75. So I got 25 cents to spare. If this was the, the late 90s, I would have been able to buy a whole bag of chips with that 25 cent. Okay? But anyways, y', all, I really Hope you enjoyed this episode and I hope that the holiday season has been magical for you. And remember, taking these small mini resets can really set the tone for you because the holidays are, are just as much for you as it is for your loved ones or your kids or, you know, anybody in your life. You have to enjoy it too. Because we never know what the next holiday season will bring. So we need to make sure that we are doing the things that make us happy during these, during these times as well. And with that being said, y', all, that is all that I have for you. If you are not already subscribed to our YouTube channel, go ahead and you're watching on the YouTube channel right now. Go ahead and hit that big red subscribe button down, down below and make sure your notifications are on so you can get all the alerts anytime we post any new episodes. We have new episodes going live every Monday and we also have our bi weekly pep talks going live every other Wednesday. So if you're listening on your favorite listening platform, make sure that you rate the podcast and leave us a review. I've said this before, but if you're listening and you hear an ad that is not in my voice that you think should not be there, please send us an email. We've had some trouble, trouble in the past with some political ads that have given us very bad reviews. And it's a dynamic insertion thing and I cannot vet every ad. It literally just runs automatically through our hosting platform. So if you see something like that, please don't leave us a one star review, y'. All. Please just say, hey, Tyra, this is what's going on on the show so I can let them know. Because what's happening, especially with political ads, the clients are miscategorizing them when they upload so they can get through all of the exclusions. Especially since we're in this climate that we're in now. So if you do hear anything like that, please let me know. But please, please, please don't leave us a one star review. I promise. Ain't nothing political supposed to be going on on, on my show. But anyways, y', all, I really hope you enjoyed this. I hope you learned something and I hope, I hope y' all take a walk and I also hope y' all buy the perfume. That's really all I got to say. Say so. I will see you guys again soon for another episode of the podcast. I don't know if I'm going to see y' all on next. I'm probably going to see y' all Wednesday. But if I don't see y' all Wednesday, I'll see y' all on Monday for another episode of the podcast. Thank you guys so much for listening. I love you all. Happy holidays. This is Affirmations for Black Girls.

[Olivia]

Meet Olivia.

[Tyra]

Hey, what's up?

[Olivia]

Olivia dreams big.

[Numerica Credit Union Representative]

I want to go back to school and get a pet and buy a.

[Tyra]

House and save for retirement and travel the world.

[Olivia]

That's quite the list.

[Numerica Credit Union Representative]

Thank you.

[Olivia]

Numerica Credit Union is the perfect partner to help turn Olivia's dreams into reality.

[Tyra]

Really? Yep.

[Olivia]

We're all about helping our members create a life that feels like theirs. And we have the tools, expertise, and guidance to make it happen.

[Tyra]

I'm in.

[Numerica Credit Union Representative]

Let's get started.

[Olivia]

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[Numerica Credit Union Representative]

One of Washington's best credit unions. We're the only credit union to be on the Forbes Best in State list five years running.

[Tyra]

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[Numerica Credit Union Representative]

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