Handling Finances After a Loved One Passes

Summary

Podcast Summary: "Handling Finances After a Loved One Passes"

Podcast: All Of It with Alison Stewart, WNYC
Date: October 13, 2025
Main Guest: Katrina Robinson, Lawyer & CEO of Teton Trust Company

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Episode Overview

This episode addresses the often-overlooked topic of handling personal finance following the death of a loved one, focusing on estate planning, wills, trusts, and the real-world challenges executors and beneficiaries may face. Host Alison Stewart is joined by Katrina Robinson, an expert in estate planning, who offers practical guidance and demystifies the legal and emotional complexities that can arise. Real listener stories add context, warmth, and lived experience to the advice.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Why Estate Planning Matters for Everyone

[02:07]

• Myth-Busting: Estate planning isn’t just for the very wealthy. Everyone accumulates assets—cars, computers, heirlooms, pets.
• Articulating Your Wishes: Without a will, wishes like “I'd really love my niece to have this antique jewelry box” may get lost.
• Quote:

  “If you don't do something about articulating these desires, well, you're kind of leaving it up to whoever's left behind to deal with the jewelry box and the ring.”
  — Katrina Robinson [02:19]

2. Will vs. Estate Planning

[03:13]

• A will is a foundational document within estate planning that records who will manage your assets (executor), who'll receive them (beneficiaries), and what exactly is being passed down.
• Wills can also include guardianship plans for minor children.

3. When Should You Get a Will?

[04:32]

• Advice: Start estate planning when you begin accumulating assets, even if, at first, they seem minor.
• Longevity: A well-written will can adapt as your possessions grow over time.
• Quote:

  “The document will be there. And when you start owning things, even if you forgot you made the will, it will encapsulate all the things that you later own.”
  — Katrina Robinson [04:32]

4. What Happens Without a Will?

[05:41]

• Intestacy Laws: State laws dictate asset distribution—often to spouses, then children, and so forth.
• Delayed Access & Loss of Control: Assets are frozen until a court-appointed administrator sorts debts and distributions, potentially leaving loved ones waiting or stressed.

5. Listener Stories: Personal Touches in Estate Planning

[06:51]

• Hillary from Westchester: Praised her mother’s humor and organization—a binder labeled “I'm dead now what?” combined with financial details and personal wishes (e.g., donating to NPR or Planned Parenthood).
  Quote:

  “It was a real comfort when she wasn't verbal anymore to... hear her voice in these funny, organized lists.”
  — Hillary [07:00]

• Alison’s Anecdote: Recalled her father’s direct instructions:

  “If you're reading this, I'm dead. The good news is we don't owe nobody nothing.”
  — Alison Stewart [08:10]

6. Designating an Executor or Trustee—Professional or Personal?

[08:23]

• No Trusted Individual?: You can hire an executor or trustee—often a lawyer or accountant experienced with estates and taxes.
• Quote:

  “Somebody who has a license, like a legal license or even an accountant could also be helpful... that expertise will really be helpful when the time comes.”
  — Katrina Robinson [08:35]

7. Handling Debts and Property as an Executor

[09:34]

• Francine from Saratoga Springs: Described navigating her uncle’s debts and hoarding, seeking guidance on selling property and managing creditors.
• Advice:

  “You'll need probably an estate lawyer to help. Better not to go it alone with Internet research or AI... especially someone local.”
  — Katrina Robinson [10:29]

8. Trusts Explained: Revocable vs. Irrevocable

[12:08]

• Analogy: Katrina explains trusts using a story about her daughter’s stuffed animal—the parent (trustee) safeguards it according to specific instructions.
• Revocable Trust: The creator (“settlor”) can reclaim the assets at any time; the trust is like an “alter ego.”
• Irrevocable Trust: Considered a complete, permanent gift. Once transferred, the giver cannot just take assets back.
  Quote:

  “Irrevocable trust is more like a completed gift... They want to make a gift and really think about someone else who should benefit from this gift later down the line.”
  — Katrina Robinson [14:39]

9. Trusts, Real Property, and Probate

[18:07]

• Listener John’s Question: About putting a co-op, condo, or house into different types of trust, especially for long-term care planning.
• Insight: Contributing real estate to a trust can streamline succession, sidestepping probate and providing continuity for someone living in the home.

10. The Role of Trustees and Executors—Choosing Wisely

[20:06]

• Successor Trustees: Always name a backup in case your first choice is unable to serve.
• Trustworthiness & Competence: Should know your wishes, be able to communicate with family, and follow complex legal directions.

11. Critical Conversations & Digital Legacy

[21:06]

• Planning Is Generous:

  “Thinking about how you'd like to leave your assets... is really this act of generosity... you're doing for people you care about.”
  — Katrina Robinson [21:06]

• Talk Early: Especially crucial if you have dependents.
• Password Management: Modern estates involve digital assets; ensuring someone can access key accounts is essential.
• Quote:

  “A lot of what we do... takes place with us in front of our phones or a computer. And the bridge... are those logins and passwords.”
  — Katrina Robinson [22:10]

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Notable Quotes

• “If you don't do something about articulating these desires, well, you're kind of leaving it up to whoever's left behind to deal with the jewelry box and the ring.” — Katrina Robinson [02:19]
• “If you're reading this, I'm dead. The good news is we don't owe nobody nothing.” — Alison Stewart [08:10]
• “Somebody who has a license, like a legal license or even an accountant could also be helpful... that expertise will really be helpful when the time comes.” — Katrina Robinson [08:35]
• “Irrevocable trust is more like a completed gift... They want to make a gift and really think about someone else who should benefit from this gift later down the line.” — Katrina Robinson [14:39]
• “Thinking about how you'd like to leave your assets... is really this act of generosity... you're doing for people you care about.” — Katrina Robinson [21:06]

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• [02:07] — Why estate planning isn’t just for the wealthy
• [03:13] — The basics of wills versus general estate planning
• [04:32] — When to start thinking about a will
• [05:41] — What happens if you don’t have a will (intestacy laws)
• [06:51] — Listener Hillary shares her mother's organized approach to planning
• [08:23] — Hiring a professional executor or trustee
• [09:34] — Listener Francine negotiates the debts of a hoarding relative
• [12:08] — Trusts explained simply (with a child’s toy analogy)
• [14:39] — Difference between revocable and irrevocable trusts
• [18:07] — Trusts for real estate and probate avoidance
• [20:06] — Why you need successor trustees and thoughtful executor selection
• [21:06] — Conversations to have now, and managing digital assets

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Tone and Style

The episode blends compassionate, jargon-free legal expertise with humor and personal stories, making potentially daunting subjects accessible and even uplifting. Alison Stewart’s conversational interviewing style and Katrina Robinson’s analogies (e.g., the Labubu toy) demystify legal processes, underscoring that planning is a final act of love and care.

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Transcript

[A]

This is all of it on wnyc. I'm Alison Stewart. Thank you so much for tuning in. Many folks have today off, and if you do, perhaps it is time to take a look at your financial picture. We wanted to bring you a collection of conversations we've had on the show recently about personal finance to help you think about and talk about money during different stages of life. Later on, we'll talk about navigating social situations like friendship or dating, where some people make a lot more or a lot less than the other. We'll also talk about how climate change has impacted the risks on homeownership and what challenges Gen Xers face as they enter retirement age. And listeners, you'll hear us taking calls throughout today's show, but these are all of it encore presentations, which means we won't be able to take your call today. And our guests today are not intended as a substitute for professional advice. And these conversations are to help you think about money in a different way. So let's get things started by talking about one of the hardest money matters to estate planning. A 2024 study on the senior platform caring.com indicated about 32% of U.S. adults have a will, or any estate planning for that matter. There are a myriad of reasons for this. Some people feel the process is too expensive. Others might not think they have enough assets to pass on, or maybe they just haven't gotten around to it. Or your loved one might have had a plan and now you, as the executor or the beneficiary, are trying to navigate what it all means and how to manage it. If you fall into any of these categories, this conversation might help. Katrina Robinson is a lawyer and chief executive officer of the Teton Trust Company. Did I say that correctly?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Teton Trust Company specializing in estate planning. Katrina, welcome back to all of it.

[B]

Thanks, Alison. Thank you so much for having me back.

[A]

Let's start with the basics. You know, estate planning, you said to people, they're like, that is for the very wealthy. This is not for me. Why should the average person consider some sort of estate planning or at least making a will?

[B]

Well, Alison, I think most people live their lives and they're, you know, they, they accumulate assets, they accumulate possessions, a car, a computer, a home, pets, lots of things. And they don't really stop to think about what is going to happen to all their possessions when they pass away. But they may have an idea in their head. You know, I'd really love my niece to have this antique jewelry box that I've Inherited or this ring that's been in my family for generations, they have these ideas. But if you don't do something about articulating these desires, well, you're kind of leaving it up to whoever's left behind to deal with the jewelry box and the ring.

[A]

So for clarity, what's the difference between.

[C]

Creating a will and doing estate planning?

[B]

Creating a will is estate planning. It's one aspect of creating your estate plan. And often it's a really important and foundational aspect of beginning the estate planning process. It's simple enough because it's basically a list of the important people who are going to take part in this process of, of helping to make sure that your assets are. Are bequeathed to the. The important people that you're also going to list, and then of course, what the assets are themselves. So it's. Think of it as a guide for someone to say, well, this person will be in charge of my things, and this person who is in charge will give my things to these people, and here are my things. And so it's a really neat way of setting everything out. And of course, the will is also important because if you have minor children, there is usually a part of the will package that will designate who should take care of your children in the case of a parent's death. If it's only one parent and if it's two parents, what happens to the children in case of simultaneous death?

[C]

So you said children, but at what point in one's life should you start to think about a will?

[B]

Well, I think it probably makes sense to think about a will once you start accumulating things. So but for most people, it will be once they start, you know, they're finished with their education, they're maybe working, they could be married, they're starting to get their adult lives in order. I think that's a good time to start thinking about it. And there's really no special goal to have in mind, right. Because the idea is that you prepare this document, and the truth is most of these documents have very general terms. So even if you don't own that much, the document will be there. And when you start owning things, even if you forgot you made the will, it will encapsulate all the things that you later own. So it's a great way to have something that you do have to spend some money on the outset to get the will. But then the will is there for when you start accumulating and building your life. And it will speak to the things that you own as you continue to own and grow.

[C]

Here's a question.

[B]

So you have children.

[C]

Why won't they just inherit everything? Why do you need a will?

[B]

Well, they will. So if you don't have a will, there are intestacy laws in every state that will dictate how your assets will be distributed. If you're married, they will go to the spouse. If you don't have a spouse, they will go to your next of kin and so on, so forth. However, if you don't have a will and you do go through intestacy, the assets are first frozen and then the court will appoint an administrator who will then decide who will then determine, okay, there are debts that need to be paid and then will start the process of bequeathing your assets to your husband or your children or your wife and your children. Or if you don't have anyone like a spouse or children, then it kind of goes down the line and sometimes it can actually go up to your parents. So it's sort of you get to control with the will and make and facilitate those gifts, whereas otherwise someone will do it for you. It's just that you don't get to choose who. Who will do it.

[C]

Let's take a few calls. Hillary is calling in from Westchester. Hi, Hillary, thank you so much for making the time to call, all of it.

[D]

Hi, thank you for taking my call. My mother was extremely organized and much before she needed to, probably in her late 40s, early 50s, had created a bind which said on the front, I'm dead now what? There was even a picture of footprints on the sand. She was a schoolteacher, so she didn't have many assets to speak of. But when she got frontal temporal dementia in her mid-60s and things really happened very quickly when we were preparing to put her into some care, it was very helpful because she not only had estate stuff and will stuff, all of her finances, her accounts, the amounts it has, what was going to her husband, what was specifically going to my sister and I. And really, like, funny little things, how she wanted to, like where she wanted her ashes to be, how she actually wanted her. Any donations to be given to Planned Parenthood and NPR actually was one of her things. She wanted money in her name to be given to. And it was a real comfort when she wasn't verbal anymore to, like, hear her voice in these funny, organized lists that she had.

[B]

Oh, that sounds so sweet.

[C]

That's how my dad did that. We had a list and he said.

[B]

If you're reading this, I'm dead.

[C]

The good news is we don't owe nobody nothing.

[B]

That was the second one. It was. It was so perfect. It was his voice.

[C]

Exactly.

[B]

This is a question, a text that.

[C]

Says, if I don't have anyone in my life who was responsible enough to handle my affairs, should I pass? Can I hire someone for this?

[B]

If. Type if.

[C]

Yes. What kind of person would I need?

[B]

Yes, you can absolutely hire someone to be, for example, the executor, or you can hire. You know, in the case of trust, people hire trustees and. And oftentimes a lawyer might be a good person to point you in the right direction. They might be able to do it themselves. But if the costs are not aligned with. With what you had in mind, then you can ask them for what they recommend. There's no straightforward path. You kind of have to ask around. But typically, somebody who has a license, like a legal license or even an accountant could also be helpful because an accounting or legal professional, they're going to be very familiar with the world of estates and taxes, which is very important. And having that expertise will really be helpful when the time comes.

[A]

Take another call. Francine is calling in from Saratoga Springs. Hi, Francine. What's on your mind?

[E]

So my uncle passed away back in February, and he was. He was a hoarder. And after I started cleaning out his place, I found out he has a lot of debt as well. So my mom is the only. Is his next of kin, and I have become the administrator of the estate, I guess, so I could help her out because she's elderly. You know, I contacted all the creditors and let them know that when I sell the estate. He has about five acres in Cameron Mills, which is about four hours west of where I am. I don't know if I should open an estate account or should I talk to a lawyer? You know, right now I'm just trying to clean out the place because it was a bad situation, but I want to be able to pay off that debt.

[A]

Let me dive in here. So she's looking for sort of next steps. She's cleaning out the house. She's figuring things out. What are her next steps?

[B]

So you're cleaning out the house, and you're figuring out what to do with your uncle's possessions and this land. And I do think that it would be helpful because there's going to be a lot of specifics involved, including the details that you shared, but other things that you'll discover in the process that you'll need probably an estate lawyer to help with. And I think that's a great example of where it's better not to go it alone with Internet research or AI and to definitely speak to someone in the community, especially someone who's local. Perhaps an attorney in Cameron Mills might also be helpful. Someone who has experience with estates and actually real property. Real estate.

[A]

Coming up, we'll have more with attorney Katrina Robinson. She's been sharing advice for thinking about financial planning ahead of a loved one's death. After a quick break, we'll get into trusts, the function of an executor, and more. This is all of It. Welcome back to all of It. I'm Alison Stewart. Let's get back into our conversation about estate planning with attorney Katrina Robinson, CEO of Teton Trust Company.

[C]

She's been sharing her expertise on end of life finances and taking listeners calls. But just a reminder, since this is an encore presentation of this conversation, we won't be able to take your calls today. Let's get back into it. I asked Katrina to explain to us what a trust is and how it works.

[B]

So, Alison, a trust is an agreement. And the way I explained it to my 6 year old daughter was, say, for example, my daughter's going to school in the morning and she says, mom, I've got this Labubu. It's my favorite toy in the world and I need you to take care of it for me until I get home from school. So could you do that and I'll say, yes, absolutely, I will take care of it for you. I'll put it in a safe closet and when you get back from school, it will be here ready and waiting for you, in good condition, very fluffy, ready to play with you. So she leaves. I take the labubu, I put it away, I put a little label on it in the name of or agreement, right? And then she gets home at 3 o' clock and she goes, well, Mom, I'm here. Where's my labubu? I need it. Okay, let me get it from the closet and give it to her. It looks great. Nothing happened to it. All day long she's super happy and she goes along her merry way. I've done what I agreed to do and we made an agreement. I fulfilled the agreement and the agreement's over. There are some things that were part of this agreement that I could not have done. I could not, for example, have taken out the Labubu and played with it myself. I could not have sold it on ebay and taken the cash and bought like a necklace or something. I could not have, you know, loaned it out. I could not do anything with it. As if I was the one who had the right to enjoy it. I did not have the right to enjoy it. I had the obligation to take care of it on behalf of my daughter. And that's basically what a revocable trust is like. You set up a trust, it's an agreement between someone who we call the settler, who settles an asset. So my daughter's a settler. In this example, the asset is the Labubu, and she's making an agreement with me, the trustee. And my job as trustee is basically to take care of this specific asset on behalf of the settler until they want it back. Now, when she took the Labubu back, at the end of the day, that's basically her revoking an asset. And so that's why I say it's like a revocable trust, which is the kind of trust where you can actually put an asset in the trust and you can take it back or take some of it back.

[A]

But an irrevocable trust means what?

[B]

Irrevocable trust is more like a completed gift. So, for example, suppose she said to me in the morning, okay, mom, here's my labubu. I love it so much. I really would like you to take care of it for a very long time. Forever, if possible. And if something happens to me, could you give it to my sister? Because I think she'd really love it. And I'll say, okay, no problem. You don't want to play with this toy anymore, but it's very valuable. You want me to keep it safe for an almost indefinite period of time. I will do that. You can count on me. And I will follow your desire to give it to your sister if she wants it at a certain point later. So what I do is I take the toy, I put it back in the closet with a nice little label, and it stays there for a very long time. And when she gets home from school, she doesn't ask me about it, because the agreement that we have now is that I'm taking care of Labubu indefinitely. And she has, in a way, relinquished her access to it. But she, you know, she still considers it valuable, but now she wants to transfer this value to someone else. And I think irrevocable trusts are like that. It's when somebody wants to make a gift and they're really thinking about someone else who should benefit from this gift later down the line.

[A]

I'm not saying that your 6 year old has tax implications, but what are the tax implications here?

[B]

Well, yes, there are tax implications. So, you know, when you have a revocable trust, typically it's because you can revoke the assets and the trust. It's almost like an alter ego for you. So it's sort of the trust, but it's also me. So anything that I would, anything that I could do that would incur tax, if my trust does it, it also incurs tax and I pay it. Right? When you have revocable trust, what happens is that the trust, if there is no distribution from the trust, if no one gets, no beneficiary of the trust gets an asset, then. But if there is a transaction, say for example, we do sell the labubu, right? And this is 20 years from now. And it turns out it's a very special rare Labubu. And we actually make about $200,000 selling this, this item. Okay? So we, that. So, so that might trigger tax. But if we don't distribute out the $200,000 to, to the sister, the trust would have to pay the tax. But if the sister says, nice, I got a good deal, instead of taking this toy when I could have, I now just get the proceeds of this toy and it's a lot of money. Well, then the sister will have to pay tax. Assuming she's at an age where she can pay tax and she would take it as income to her and she would pay tax based on her taxable rate. Or she could say, you know what, I'm so happy that I have $200,000, but actually I only need 1000. So can the trust keep 199,000 and I'll just take 1000 and so 1000 to her will be attributed as income and she will have to pay taxes on that.

[A]

We've got a line on these trusts here. This is John calling from Plainview. Hi, John, what's your question?

[E]

Hi, Alison, thank you so much. Question is the difference in pros and cons of putting real property like a co op, condo or a house in an irrevocable trust or a revocable trust. And in terms of long term care as well. Thank you so much.

[A]

What do you think?

[B]

Well, I think I actually just dealt with this issue in my co op and the consensus was that it was actually just as beneficial for the co op to have the shares in a trust as it was for the shareholder to establish the trust and contribute the shares. I think it can do a couple things for you as an individual. Setting up a trust and contributing shares or actual ownership of a property into the trust, you are able to line up the succession of that property rather seamlessly. Because the beauty of the trust is that it doesn't go through probate. So if there are any other family members who live in the home, they can take possession of that home and live in that home, you know, from one moment to the next. They don't have to go through a probate or intestacy. So it really helps facilitate that. And then in terms of any common charges that you have to pay to a condo association or a co op, well, usually there's an account that will be dedicated to paying those shared fees. So for the co op or the condo, it's nice because they don't have to worry about an estate, you know, having to be settled for them to be paid.

[A]

This is an interesting question. I have a will and a revocable trust. Both have the same instructions. The first is a trustee. The second trustee is there in case the first one dies before me. Do I need both of them?

[B]

Both trustees? Oh, that's such a great plan. Because something could happen to you. And it's really great that if you can name a successor trustee just as a backup, really good planning.

[A]

If you're thinking of being an executor.

[C]

What'S important in choosing an executor for.

[B]

Your will or to be a trustee for an executor? I would say the executor has to really understand what the undertaking is. And I think if you. They can have a good understanding of what your desires are, whether by a letter that you leave or ongoing discussion, they have to really understand what your intention is. And secondly, they have to have the competency to really read the will, understand the will, track down assets, deal with family members, and do so in a timely and professional manner.

[C]

Something that you said, it's really important, aside from the wills, the trusts, the trustees, it's the important conversations to have right now. Things that you know that people need to know right now. What are some of those things that are very important?

[B]

I think the most important thing is, you know, estate planning. And just thinking about how you'd like to leave your assets to other people is really this act of generosity that we've talked about before. It's something that you're doing for people that you care about. It's really for them, because you know you'll be gone. So you don't have to worry too much. But you will. You are concerned and you. You will have concern about what happens to people that you love and care about. And so especially when you are in that position, if you have any dependence. It's really crucial that you start thinking and having conversations with the people that matter in your life about what your intentions are. And if you are stuck and you just seem like you can't get it done, just try to get some help. And oftentimes you can reach out to friends for help. Friends can refer you to a professional, a lawyer, accountant. They may know someone who's had their will drafted, or they may know someone who set up a trust. And you just keep like a detective, you just keep following, you know, and also people's passwords, passwords. Well, passwords is a big one. So every time before I go on a trip, a business trip, I tell my husband where my passwords are, just in case. But that's true. People forget that, you know, we have such our digital lives are so important. A lot of what we do, a lot of our transactions, a lot of everything to do with money takes place with us in front of our phones or a computer. And the bridge between us and what we're looking at on the screen are those logins and passwords. And I won't give any recommendations as to how to keep your passwords because I think that's deeply personal and probably the way I do it is the one that they don't recommend. But you just have to make sure you have access to them and that somebody that you trust in your family can have access to them.

[C]

That was my conversation with legal expert Katrina Robinson, chief executive officer of the Teton Trust Company, which specializes in estate planning. Up next, author and financial educator Farnoosh Tarabi helps us navigate income disparities and what to do. If you're in a relationship where one person makes significantly more money than the other, it can get awkward, not just for dating but for friendships as well. We'll get into it after a short break. This is all of it.

[F]

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