Podcast Episode Summary: “I Wish You All The Best” - A Non-Binary Coming of Age Film
Podcast: All Of It (WNYC)
Host: Alison Stewart
Guests: Tommy Dorfman (Director/Co-writer), Corey Fogelmanis (Lead Actor)
Date: October 29, 2025

Overview

This episode of “All Of It” dives into I Wish You All The Best, a new coming-of-age film directed by Tommy Dorfman, adapted from Mason Deaver’s acclaimed YA novel. The film centers on Ben, a non-binary teenager in the South who is forced out of their home after coming out and must negotiate identity, family, and self-acceptance in a new environment. Host Alison Stewart explores the motivations behind the film, the adaptation process, the emotional layers of the story, and the significance of non-binary representation with Dorfman and the film’s star, Corey Fogelmanis.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Why This Story, and Why Now?

[02:48] Tommy Dorfman on Initial Attraction to the Book:

• Dorfman was profoundly moved by Mason Deaver’s novel, feeling “seen and valuable and understood as a non-binary person.”
• Recognized a lack of films centered on non-binary and queer experiences for both those communities and wider audiences.
• Quote:

  "I immediately felt that we were missing a movie like this in the canon...for queer people, but also for allies and really the world at large." (Dorfman, 02:57)

2. Adapting From Novel to Screen

[05:46] The Adaptation Challenge:

• The novel's diary-like, introspective style posed difficulties for visual storytelling.
• Dorfman’s approach was to externalize Ben’s internal conflict and clarify each character’s purpose.
• Highlighted the importance of portraying even “villainized” characters like the parents with nuance and compassion.
• Quote:

  "Even the parents...could be villainized so easily... Trying to understand their motivations, even if I don't agree with them, offered a lot of compassion and grace for me...as a trans person, frankly..." (Dorfman, 05:46)

3. Ben’s Emotional Journey and Representation

[04:20] Ben’s Protective Shell:

• Alison highlights Ben’s “sad hoodies” as emblematic of their emotional state.
• Fogelmanis explains the importance of truthfulness and showing Ben’s protective tendencies as a reaction to the lack of support.

  "It's very protective." (Fogelmanis, 04:33)

[19:40] Finding Joy Amid Hardship:

• The film doesn’t dwell solely in trauma—Ben’s journey also contains friendship, love, and the gradual emergence of self-expression.
• Fogelmanis describes the importance of showing how Ben’s body language, clothing, and confidence shift over the story.

  "The shoulders kind of go back and their eyes are off the ground, and the clothes become a little bit more expressive and confident. ...It ends up being this incredible moment of expansion for them because they have people who care about them." (Fogelmanis, 19:40)

4. The Family Dynamic: Navigating Love and Alienation

[10:11] Depicting Complex Parental Relationships:

• Dorfman wanted to show the "quiet" love in Ben’s family alongside repression and a lack of freedom of expression, setting up the stakes for Ben’s coming out.
• The structure allowed the audience to see some warmth before the rupture, emphasizing Ben’s perspective and the disorientation following rejection.

[14:17] On Ben's Relationship with Sister Hannah:

• Ben and Hannah are virtually strangers at the story’s start. Accepting help and building trust is painful and slow, underscoring isolation and the tentative nature of found family.

  "It's the hardest thing for them to do in this moment. But there's really no one else for them to call." (Fogelmanis, 13:26)

Memorable Scene (Clip, 14:39–15:37):

• Ben’s parents show up at Hannah’s house, highlighting generational divides and differing responses to non-binary identity.
• The script illustrates both the cruelty and confusion from Ben's parents and Hannah’s fierce protectiveness.

5. On Coming Out, Privacy, and Support

[15:48] Why Ben Isn’t Immediately Out to His Sister:

• Dorfman stresses the exhaustion and risk repeatedly coming out entails, especially after trauma.

  "As a trans person who's come out so many times in different ways...it can be really exhausting and taxing." (Dorfman, 15:48)

• The film highlights that queer people “don’t owe” coming out to anyone if they are not ready—a nuance often missing from mainstream narratives.

6. Casting, Collaboration, and On-Set Experiences

[21:19] Building a Unique Ensemble:

• Casting mixed auditioned newcomers with established actors (Cole Sprouse, Alexandra Daddario, Lena Dunham).
• Lena Dunham filmed all her scenes as Ms. Lyons in a single day, bringing levity and spontaneity.
• Quote:

  "She would just say whatever came to mind... she just has this incredible mind, and she’s so quick and just—she's so herself." (Fogelmanis on Dunham, 24:48)

[25:28] The Challenge of Leading Roles & Debuts:

• Both Dorfman (first feature as director) and Fogelmanis (first lead in a film) discussed the exhaustion but also the authenticity that came from living through Ben’s emotional arc.
• Fogelmanis found that his own lived experience while filming enhanced his portrayal:

  "There was this beautiful blending of what was going on in life as I was filming...as long as it was truthful and honest." (Fogelmanis, 25:28)

[26:14] Dorfman on Directing:

• Describes being “pulled in a thousand different directions,” the joy of collaboration, and the director’s responsibility to serve everyone’s craft.
• Quote:

  "My job as a director...is someone who can be in service to everyone else's craft. ...Giving my actors the safest, you know, best space for them to work and be comfortable and relaxed and locked in and in the moment..." (Dorfman, 26:14)

Memorable Quotes & Timestamps

• "I read it in one sitting. I cried, I laughed. I felt seen and valuable and understood as a non binary person..." —Tommy Dorfman (02:57)
• "It's very protective." —Corey Fogelmanis, on Ben’s “sad hoodies” (04:33)
• "I don't want to, like, traumatize people either in some of these moments. ...Making sure that everything feels like it's from Ben's perspective." —Tommy Dorfman (10:27)
• "It's the hardest thing for them to do in this moment. But there's really no one else for them to call." —Corey Fogelmanis (13:26)
• "As a trans person who's come out so many times in different ways...it can be really exhausting and taxing." —Tommy Dorfman (15:48)
• "The shoulders kind of go back and their eyes are off the ground, and the clothes become a little bit more expressive and confident." —Corey Fogelmanis (19:40)
• "My job as a director...is someone who can be in service to everyone else's craft." —Tommy Dorfman (26:14)

Notable Moments & Timestamps

• Opening & Film Introduction: [00:37–02:40]
• Tommy Dorfman on Book and Adaptation: [02:48–08:30]
• Audition and Film Casting Process: [04:34, 21:19–24:42]
• Ben’s Relationship with Family/Hannah: [10:11–15:37]
• On Coming Out and Identity: [15:48–18:39]
• Joy, Progression, and Acting Choices: [19:40–21:19]
• Directing & Collaboration Reflections: [26:09–28:18]

Tone & Takeaways

This episode balances honesty and hope, acknowledging the trauma non-binary youth often face, while celebrating the power of acceptance, chosen family, and self-discovery. Dorfman and Fogelmanis discuss their creative processes with warmth and candor, emphasizing the importance of nuanced, joyful, and intersectional queer representation in media.

For Listeners: Why This Episode Matters

• Provides rare insight into adapting a beloved, voice-driven YA novel for the screen, centered on a non-binary protagonist.
• Illuminates the day-to-day realities and complexities of non-binary identity, especially regarding family dynamics and coming out.
• Demonstrates the impact of authentic queer representation through thoughtful casting, on-set collaboration, and storytelling choices.

Film Release:
I Wish You All The Best opens in theaters Friday, November 7th.