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Abigail
This episode is brought to you by. Prime Obsession is in session. And this summer, Prime Originals have everything you want. Steamy romances, irresistible love stories, and the book to screen favorites you've already read twice off campus. Elle every year after the love hypothesis, Sterling point and more slow burns, second chances, chemistry you can feel through the screen. Your next obsession is waiting. Watch only on Prime
Blake
Girl. Winter is so last season and now spring's got you looking at pictures of tank tops with hungry eyes.
Abby
Your algorithm is feeding you cutoffs.
Blake
You're thirsty for the sun on your shoulders that perfect hang on the patio. Sundress those sandals you can wear all day and all night. And you've had enough of shopping from your couch. Done. Hoping it looks anything like the picture when you tear open that envelope. It's time for a little in person spring treat. It's time for a trip to Ross. Work your magic.
Abby
What's the difference between polygamy and polyamory?
Abigail
I don't think much.
Abby
Is it marriage?
Abigail
I couldn't think of anything more patriarchal than letting your husband or your boyfriend go out and sleep with other women. The guy next to me took his shoes and socks off and it smelled
Abby
like farts and eggs. Do you guys take your shoes off on the airplane? No, I take my shoes off.
Abigail
Oh, my goodness.
Abby
A lot of people order alcohol from the, like, little cart on the plane. I'm like, you want that little.
Abigail
I don't know. I feel like people that have anxiety do it a lot.
Abby
Oh, I should do that.
Abigail
Welcome back to Always Here.
Abby
We're your hosts, Abby Howard and Abby Howard.
Abigail
Yeah.
Abby
Hello. Hello. Hello.
Abigail
Honestly, it feels like. It feels good to be back in the chair.
Abby
Yeah.
Abigail
The last. Last two times we filmed, we were on the couches, which you won't see these in order, but it feels like. Feels good to be back.
Abby
That dynamic threw me off.
Abigail
I know. That was our first time having dance.
Abby
It was really fun, but we. This feels comfortable, more natural.
Abigail
Yes, I know. Even, like, just when do you speak? When do you jump in? Like, I almost. I'm listening back to the mom's episode now, and they sound so sweet and good, which I. I realized during both of those. I'm very protective over, like, what my mom said and what Caleb said. I'm like, I'm going to protect them. You know what I mean?
Abby
Yeah, yeah, but.
Abigail
Which I know you guys will be gracious, but I wish listening back that I, like, chimed in and hyped my mom up more. You know, it just kind of chimed in more. I think we were. I was just listening. Yeah. You know, there are always things that you leave being like, I wish I said this, or I wish I said
Abby
that, but I hate that. I know that's right.
Abigail
But it was the first time.
Abby
It's hard to listen to things back.
Abigail
Like, I know I'm miserable to listen, totally. But also, it's been good. It's my own constructive feedback. I'm like, okay, I'm new to this, so let's listen to it and learn and improve, hopefully. But, yeah, it was so fun.
Abby
Did we say that we're here to share the hope in the heart with heart and humor.
Abigail
Hey, we're here to share the hope in the heart with heart and humor.
Abby
That's what we're going to do right now.
Abigail
Yes.
Abby
What's been going on? What's your hope?
Abigail
My hope. I actually just did this recent Instagram series, Falling Back in Love with My Closet, and you look good. Thanks. Thanks. It's been fun. It's been a fun series. I just. I'm sure a lot of women can relate to that feeling of, like, your body just goes through so many changes within the last year and a half of pregnancy, postpartum, or even if it's not that, even if I had messages from girls, being like, this has helped me in recovering from an eating disorder. And just like, really amazing messages. And there's so many times in your womanhood where your body's gonna change and you're adjusting. And it's this fear of rejection of my own clothes where it's like, oh, when I'm just going through the day, I feel good, or I feel like I look in the mirror and I see myself a certain way, but then I go to my closet and. And I try on my clothes and then I'm just kind of put back down where I'm like, oh, I actually don't fit into these things like I thought, or they don't look. They don't look on me how I pictured that they would or that they did. And then it's just this cycle of constantly having to get back to like, oh, I actually am content. Or like, you know, get your baseline of your self esteem and your clothes. My lace was always moving. So, yeah, seven months postpartum, like, it's time for me to. I just kind of stopped trying on stuff and I was like, I'm just gonna wear what I know fits right now. But now I'm kind of at this point where, okay, things are starting to, like, fit back. So I've just been scared to try things on and get rejected again. So this series was kind of like a ripping the band aid off and trying to have fun with my closet again and not just throwing everything out and donating it all and just starting fresh. But, like, let's see. Let's work, and let's have fun again.
Abby
I definitely threw everything out. Yeah.
Abigail
I remember when you threw all your maternity stuff away.
Abby
Threw that got rid of. I didn't throw it away.
Abigail
I donated it.
Abby
Yeah. To a woman's shelter area. But then I also, like, like, all the. Everything I wore in Hawaii, gone. Matt, like, pulls things up. He's like, where did this go?
Abigail
I was like, gone.
Abby
I can't look at that.
Abigail
Yeah.
Abby
That freaking yellow bikini. The amount of Matt. Yeah. He's like, why did you ever get rid of this? I was like, because I can't get my right cheek in that. I'm like, because I don't want to see what I'm gonna look like in that.
Blake
It's true.
Abby
Like, there's, like, a fear. And I even remember, like, when I had gotten, like, I don't weigh myself too often whenever I had gotten to back to what I would, like, perceive as, like, oh, okay, like, this is where I wanted to be. I still remember trying on my clothes and being like, things just don't look the same. Right. Like, my whole body was proportioned differently, and it still is. Like, I mean, obviously now I'm pregnant again, but, like, I just remember being like, okay, this is just not gonna look the same way. So then I was like, I just think this. These clothes are done.
Abigail
Totally.
Abby
But I do think that I had some things I did. I'm so glad I hung on to. Because I'm like, things are still. The dust is still settling.
Abigail
Right.
Abby
For years on out.
Abigail
No, totally. That's why I feel like I was like, I want to be kind of slow about donating things in the postpartum season, because even right now, like, okay, I'm not wearing a ton of color or really fun things or short dresses or, you know, some of this, like, fun, flirty, colorful stuff that I had before. And it just feels wrong in this season where I'm, like, nursing and, you know, have a baby. It just doesn't feel like my personality right now. But I know those things will come back, and it's like, I don't always have to be this, like, serious only brown T shirts girl. You know what I mean? Like, the color will come back, and so I don't want to just get rid of all that stuff. So I'm trying to challenge myself to at least try it on.
Abby
I put on swimsuits last night.
Blake
Mm.
Abigail
It's the season. Summertime.
Abby
I was like, I genuinely don't need anyone to tell me I look good. That my belly. I don't need that. It's not gonna convince me. And I'm not, like, insecure about it. Well, maybe I am a little bit. I'm like, I wanna let the bump out. Well, it's just. I feel like your belly looks a little different after their first pregnancy. Like, the subsequent ones, she's already a little misshapen and things. Like, it's just, like, there's a lot. And so I was trying on new swimsuits, and I was like, wow, we're gonna air this out at the pool. I was like, this is crazy, but y. Fine.
Abigail
I never thought anything of it.
Abby
No.
Abigail
And it's things that you only notice about yourself, you know?
Abby
Now I got a picture for you.
Abigail
Okay. Oh.
Abby
Just to know that I'm. I. I don't think I'm being dramatic here.
Abigail
I was with Vivian. My belly button became like a little witch's hat. Like, it got really pointy. And I got really insecure about it because I was like, I can't even look cute with a.
Abby
You can't even see the bottoms most of the time.
Abigail
What am I looking at exactly?
Abby
No, I don't mean it like that. You look so cute in that. No, I do not. Yes, you do. That one get purchased.
Abigail
Really? I like the brown polka dots.
Abby
Oh, my gosh. My. My boobs look like Animal Planet.
Abigail
I didn't even look at your boobs.
Abby
Good.
Abigail
I was like, I need more support.
Abby
No, it was.
Abigail
It was.
Blake
It's.
Abby
It's one of those things where it's like, I truly do feel freedom from, like, that. Like, I'm like, okay, that's so not what's important right now. But then sometimes I'm like, wow, we
Abigail
can still be real far.
Abby
We have.
Abigail
Right?
Abby
Right.
Abigail
I'm like, things are different now. I would never go back. And I do it over and over again. But totally, things are different. Totally.
Abby
We can. We can talk about it.
Abigail
It's fin belly. But my hope is that I feel like I'm moving into a better place.
Abby
You're stylish.
Abigail
Yeah.
Abby
I like those shorts.
Abigail
Thanks. They're actually maternity. I got them. My mom got them for me when I was pregnant, and I never wore them when I was pregnant. I actually like them better on me now. Yeah. They're old areas.
Abby
I. I feel like my belly is lower than it's ever been in other pregnancies. And when I wear things below the
Abigail
bump, it feels better.
Abby
It. No, it feels like I'm exposing myself.
Abigail
Oh, yeah. You're like, that is my.
Abby
But it does feel way better.
Abigail
I don't know.
Abby
We're in a tough dresses.
Abigail
It is dresses.
Abby
But then my thighs started chafing.
Abigail
Yeah, you're right. What do I do?
Abby
I couldn't see. I was like, matt, is there a rash out there?
Abigail
He's like, a little bit.
Abby
I was like, dang.
Abigail
Anyway, you got a hope or do you want to do it?
Abby
My hope is I'm really excited to go to Hawaii. Yeah. Kind of the inspiration for today's episode, but I'm really excited. I feel like. I feel like we travel a lot, but this one feels like hopefully it'll be more just, like, restful and family focused. Then a lot of things are like double dipping with work things, which I'm sure we will still work while we're there. But it'll just feel hopefully just like a really good time. Cause it's our last trip as a family of four. This is the last time we're going, just us, and so it'll be really special, and I'm really excited. And you know what? I don't even actually feel that sentimental about? I love our family unit of four, but I think we've just been so ready to add someone else to the family that I'm not sentimental about it. But I am, like, excited to just, like, celebrate a last hoorah with, like, me and two boys. Well, actually, three boys.
Abigail
Right.
Abby
And then it'll be four boys, right?
Abigail
What do you mean? Oh, who's Matt?
Blake
Oh, I thought you were just, like, manifesting another boy.
Abigail
I know.
Abby
I do have strong feelings. I'm having another boy after this.
Abigail
Yeah.
Abby
Just gonna put that over there.
Abigail
Okay. Put it on the Internet. We'll clock in a couple years.
Abby
I do have strong feelings about that, but because, like, I don't know why. Like, when I see moms with, like, all boys, I'm like, this is a glimpse into my future.
Blake
Hey, my mom had three girls and then a boy. I know.
Abby
It happens. It does.
Blake
It does happen.
Abby
It does happen. I don't know why I have that feeling, but. Well, no problem. My heart, though, is that my stomach hurts.
Abigail
Your stomach hurts? Why?
Abby
I don't know. I think it could be two things. I think digestive issues related to pregnant.
Abigail
No, the other way. Yeah. Sorry. About that.
Abby
Stomach aches and just like. Just upset stomach to the point where I'm like, what's going on? Like, it's just. But then I'm also like, it could be stress induced.
Abigail
Right.
Abby
That could be a problem.
Abigail
Are you feeling anxious?
Abby
I am, but I don't want to talk about it because I feel like I always talk about that and my life is so good and I'm so grateful, but I'm just like.
Abigail
Just like with work. Just overwhelm of everything or just specific things? No.
Abby
Yeah, just everything. Everything.
Abigail
Yeah. I mean. Yeah. Well, here it's the day before you're leaving for a trip that's the most stressful day of the year.
Abby
Yeah. There's just a lot to be done. So much to do, and it'll all get done.
Abigail
But are you the type? I don't know why. The day before I leave for vacation, I. I am doing everything that I've been putting off for months. I'm like, I'm going to the post office. I'm returning everything that used to be all my returns. Like things that aren't actually pressing, but for some reason, I'm gone for three days. I need to do it. It's like the day you check everything off your list and it's the most stressful day and you're up to like 1am for no reason. At least I am.
Abby
I wish I have so many things. I feel like I'm actually just doing the things I need to, like, actually need to do. Okay.
Abigail
So that's. That's actually efficiency. But I do a lot of other
Abby
things that just will never get done because of that. Like, I need to get my kids immunization records from their pediatrician. And I'm like, when will that ever last?
Abigail
Why do you do that?
Abby
For their. Like.
Abigail
Oh, for school.
Abby
For preschool.
Abigail
Interesting.
Abby
And they will not email it to me. I know a lot of pediatricians will. Or they could do it on their portal, but they will not. So that's actually my own personal information.
Abigail
That actually seems like old school kind of far. Mm.
Abby
And the lady. Yeah. Anyway.
Abigail
Anyway. That's hard.
Abby
Who's gonna make it there? That'll happen.
Abigail
Hey. My heart is that I got attacked by a bird twice.
Abby
Wait, two separate occasions.
Abigail
Yeah. So.
Abby
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Abigail
The next day went back. But here's the thing. Let me tell you. My mistake. Here's what I did.
Abby
Okay.
Abigail
I was on a walk in my neighborhood.
Abby
That is hard, Abigail.
Abigail
I know. Fool me once. Shame on me. Wait, shame on you? Feel me twice. Shame on me.
Abby
Yeah.
Abigail
So the first time I was on a walk, and I'm walking my dog, and I noticed this bird kind of out of my peripheral vision. And I'm like, oh, that bird was kind of low. And then I hear this. I feel this, like, hit on my back. And I'm like, dang, was that my ponytail? And I'm like, no, my hair's not that long. And then I go, oh, maybe that bird's like learning to fly. I don't know why that was my thought. I turn around, this bird is dive bombing me, coming back at me again, and I go. And I sprinted across the street with my dog.
Abby
That's so scary.
Abigail
It was. And it kind of followed me across the street. Like, I was like, it's not.
Abby
Leave me alone.
Abigail
So Louis and I kind of ran a little bit, and it left me alone. After that, I was like, whoa, that's crazy. There must be a nest or something. So the next day. This is so stupid. The next day, I'm going on a walk again. And I, in my head, I'm like, okay, wherever that tree was, I'm going to cross the street earlier to avoid the bird. I'm not going to go past that tree. So I am kind of walking, and I noticed the bird that looks like the bird that attacked me the day before on the fence right next to me. And it's kind of following me along the fence line. But I'm way early. I'm like, way ahead of the tree.
Abby
Like, I'm not in your territory. I'm not in the territory.
Abigail
So then I start crossing the street. The bird comes at me again. It's dive bombing me. And I'm like, flinging my arms with Lewis. I'm like. And this time there were witnesses.
Abby
I was a couple witnesses. There are witnesses.
Abigail
This guy in a truck drive past me. He goes. He rolled his window down, goes, ha ha ha. Laughed in my face and goes, it almost gotcha.
Abby
And I was like, surely did.
Abigail
And then the guy on his driveway said, yeah, that nest is, like in my yard and I'm the mama bird. I said, yeah, but the bird's not attacking you. And he says, yeah, okay. So just me, the dog, maybe. Maybe it is the dog. The dog. The dog living. Yeah. So you know what you thought I would learn the first time?
Abby
That's freaky.
Abigail
Yeah, it's an aggressive mom. She's a mom. She's like a bird. She said, don't come near my children.
Abby
You gotta find a whole new route. Until those babies hatch.
Abigail
I know. When do they hatch? How long does it take? Like, two weeks.
Blake
I don't know. There was a dead bird out of a tree today.
Abigail
When they fall out. Yeah, it's sad.
Blake
It was sad.
Abigail
One time, Sophie and I, my sister, saw a bird that had fallen out, and we took it to the vet, like, ran it to the vet. And I don't know if it made it or not, but that was pretty stupid. I don't know. Like, we ran into an emergency vet. We're like, this bird was just on the ground.
Abby
Sweet.
Abigail
Couldn't fly. Yeah. Sad, sad circle of life, you know?
Abby
Hopefully they did something. Yeah, my sweet fourth grade teacher took a dwarf hamster to the vet to, like, give it life saving measures.
Abigail
Life saving.
Abby
I hope they saved that hamster. I think they did.
Abigail
What happened to it?
Abby
The cage. She had so many classroom pets. I feel like this is back in the day when you could have classroom pets. They wouldn't let you do that anymore. Allergies?
Abigail
No, probably not. They were so.
Abby
The crates were stacked, and we, like me and my friends, would clean out their crates at recess sometimes.
Abigail
Cute.
Abby
And one of my good friends accidentally, like, when she was reaching out. We were in fourth grade.
Abigail
We were really short, letting you reach for these cages. I fell.
Abby
And that little hamster smushed. Was, like, stunned for a while, but he was still alive. Not smushed, but, like, maybe paralyzed.
Abigail
Yeah. My friend closed the hamster in her door.
Abby
Yeah, there's. There's.
Abigail
There's so many hamster stories.
Abby
Rodents never have a good end.
Abigail
No, they don't.
Abby
Except for my hamster, Maggie.
Blake
Listen, we brought a hamster.
Abby
She lived six years. Whoa.
Abigail
What is with the longevity of your pets?
Abby
Apparently, I take really good care of them.
Blake
My older sister brought home a classroom pet. A hamster. It got out in our home.
Abby
No, always happens.
Blake
And we have cats, so I know we were nervous. Good thing my dad works for a company that makes fiber optic things. You just had some night vision goggles at work.
Abigail
What?
Blake
So we brought them in there, like, heat rated.
Abby
You were kidding.
Blake
So we found the hamster.
Abigail
You had a night grade. Everybody, let's just wait till it gets dark.
Abby
Wait, why does that remind me of. Honey, I shrunk the kids. When he's leaning above the grass, he's, like, got the glasses. He's, like, going through every blade of grass. I love that movie.
Abigail
That just unlocked a memory. I forgot about that movie.
Abby
You know what movie I was thinking about the other day? I was like, I need to watch. And now I can't think of it. Okay, okay.
Blake
No, I don't know what movie.
Abigail
I don't know either, but let it. Let's let it come on back.
Blake
I was also just thinking our new, like, wow, that's crazy. That, like, that saying that we all are saying is surely.
Abby
Surely. Like, surely.
Abigail
That's funny.
Abby
Did I start. Matt's made fun of me years for
Blake
saying Caitlyn started it.
Abigail
Really?
Blake
I think Caitlin says it all the time. I think we got it from Caitlyn.
Abigail
I could see that she's got some fun, like, verbiage in uinda, things that we definitely pick up on.
Abby
Matt has made fun of me for years for saying that, though.
Abigail
Really?
Abby
Because he's like, is it S H, I, R, L, E, Y or S? I think surely, surely.
Blake
It's surely with a bunch of U's.
Abigail
Yes, that's the Midwest in us. Surely, Surely.
Abby
The movie I really want to watch is remember the classic. And it's not the classic because it's the new one, but in my mind, it's a classic. The Hairspray with Zac Efron and John Travolta. That is such a good movie.
Abigail
That is a good movie.
Abby
It came up on my Spotify a song from that because I've been playing Annie because Griffin been obsessed with Annie ever. He always sings Tomorrow. Now since I took him, he's like, tomorrow. And then Augie sings it too, because Griffin taught it to him. And anyway, that came on next and I was like, that movie was so good. I need to watch that again.
Abigail
I loved the song Amanda Bynes did The Dog of the Chocolate. The Sweet.
Abby
Yes.
Abigail
Run and Tell that.
Abby
I forgot that was her.
Abigail
Yeah, that's probably the last thing she. Yeah, that or Eda, I think, was
Abby
one of her last movies. Okay. I was such a. I saw that movie in theaters. Anyway, let's bring that movie back.
Abigail
Yes, that's a good idea. Thank you to Magic Spoon for sponsoring this portion of today's episode. Magic Spoon just figured out how to turn treats into something you can actually feel good about eating. If you love sweet snacks like I do, but you hate the sugar crash, this is about to be your new obsession. Magic Spoon treats are crispy, airy, protein packed snack bars. They have 12 grams of protein, 7 grams of fiber, 0 grams of added sugar, 2 to 3 grams net carbs, and are certified gluten free. Those macros are crazy. Okay. These bars are so good, they genuinely feel like a treat, not a sad health bar. My personal favorite flavor is the marshmallow. But they also have chocolate, peanut butter, double chocolate, and more. Very nostalgic feeling snacks. They're very dessert coated, but they also don't load you up on sugar. So it's a protein bar that you can feel good about. If you already know Magic spoon for their cereal, it's so iconic. Their fruity cereal is my favorite. I actually had it for breakfast today. Their high protein, zero sugar cereal brings all the childhood nostalgia with none of the sugar bomb. Magic spoon is really easy to find. Just look for magic spoon at your local grocery store. They just rolled out treats nationwide at 711 also. And if you haven't tried them yet, check out Magic spoon's new protein pastries, A high protein, low sugar take on the classic toaster pastries you grew up with. Wait, I really want that. You can get $5 off your next order, including the protein pastries@magicspoon.com Abby that's magicspoon.com Abby for $5 off.
Abby
Wow. That's crazy.
Abigail
Ow. That's crazy.
Abby
That's crazy. Now we need to hype Abigail up for this week.
Abigail
Okay, well, here. Here's the thing, okay? The crazy here, we're talking about polyamory.
Blake
Can we just preface on here? It says, let Abigail loose.
Abby
Let Abigail loose. Go Abby. Go Abby. Go Abby.
Abigail
I'm not gonna watch. I'm not gonna say anything of heat, but I just think it's an interesting topic. But polyamory, I've listened to two interviews recently where with different people, where it's massive interviews where it's been brought up of like, open relationships, open marriages. And the comment section was a little surprising to me both times. And just the sentiment around open marriage, open dating relationships. So I was like, this is like a really interesting topic of conversation. And I know, like, within recent reality tv, like, it's going to be a big topic coming up here, like thruffles and all these things. So I just feel like I had a lot of things come to mind. Like, this is an interesting topic. Let me stop dancing around it.
Abby
No, seriously, first of all, actually, someone literally asked me yesterday, they're like, what's the difference between polygamy and polyamory?
Abigail
I don't think much, to be honest.
Abby
Is it marriage?
Abigail
Well, polygamy is one man, many wives. Yeah, I kind of googled this before we were talking about it. Polyamory is just an open relationship. So, like, the men and women can have extra affairs.
Abby
Okay.
Abigail
And that's kind of open on both sides.
Abby
Usually associated with not consent.
Abigail
Right.
Abby
And also, like, child brides.
Abigail
Yeah, I would agree. But also, I think that's like, a big thing to me is that I feel like it's the same thing, just a different font. Like, you're telling me that when it's polygamy and it's a man with many wives, it's illegal and wrong and bad, but with polyamory, we're just going to change the name and say, oh, the women can do it too, if she wants, but the man's still going to go out. And, like, just to me, I'm like, it's the same thing, just kind of different. And I feel like one is really, obviously for good reason. Like, polygamy is wrong and bad, and so it's for good reason, like, talked about negatively, but just the sentiment around these open marriages. You read the comments, and it's like, oh, how beautiful. So many loving people in one situation. And both of these people that I heard these women that were in these interviews talking about this are like, strong feminist women. And I was very confused by them then being in open relationships and open marriages, because to me, I couldn't think of anything more patriarchal than an open marriage or, like, letting your husband or your boyfriend go out and sleep with other women. I just literally can't think of anything more. Like. Like, the power dynamic there is so weird. The manipulation that comes into play with that is so weird. And it just made me really mad. I was like, this just doesn't make actually any sense with what you're saying. Like, you're the one girl was not gonna go out and have extra affairs, but she wanted her boyfriend, too, and
Blake
she got turned on by it. Yes, she did.
Abigail
Yeah. I was like, wow, okay, so that's. I mean, she said it was weird, but I'm like, but that is. I'm like, okay, but the empower balance there is so interesting. And I think, too, it's like, you're. To be fully known is to be fully loved. And so if you're saying, hey, husband or boyfriend, you can pick these things about me that you like, and then the other things that I can't give you, you can go get from someone else.
Abby
Yeah, shop elsewhere.
Abigail
Shop elsewhere. Pick and choose what you want from me and then go get other things from other ladies. Like, that is so disrespectful to yourself. Like, you are enough. And, like, that is the point of a relationship is to be fully chosen and chosen every day to be loved and served and cared for. You know? And so I don't know, just this idea of it is really. It's just really ticking me off a little bit.
Abby
Yeah. And I think it's. It's wild how far reaching the relevance is, because before this even became, like, in those circles, like, the circles I listen to, like, callers have called into John Deloney that have been a part of relationships, like, marriages like this for years. And a lot of times I would say almost every time it's a woman calling, being like, I want to close our open relationship.
Abigail
Right.
Abby
But, like, how do I do that after if this has been like, our marriage for the past 10 years?
Abigail
Yeah. And he's so hard.
Abby
Yeah. I mean, I don't know how you could. That feels nearly impossible at that point. Right. You know, like, I just can't.
Abigail
Like, it's just not.
Abby
I shouldn't say impossible, but that feels like.
Abigail
Yeah. I don't know how you do that.
Abby
You have to start a whole new everything, build everything up from the bottom, because that's totally.
Abigail
And I'm gonna be so frank. I haven't. This isn't just these two people I'm talking about. Like, I was. I got on polygamy TikTok. I don't know how I got on that. No.
Abby
Polyamory.
Abigail
No, I know. Bygone polygamy TikTok. And it wasn't like FLDS. It was like business CEOs, like, corporate guys with two. You know, they're not legally married, but, like. And they call themselves polygamous. It's like, becoming more of a thing in culture. And because of social media, I feel like it's just becoming more known before it kind of hit in the dark.
Abby
Right.
Abigail
And that's why it was like, we
Abby
are probably shouldn't be doing this, but we. We are doing it right. And now it's like, no, let's make it right. Normal, beautiful.
Abigail
And people in the comments love it. They're like, this is so amazing. You all get what you need. And that's the part to me where I'm like, every adult, consenting adult has the. The right to make whatever decisions they want with their life. But then when it's like young people seeing this and even just people that are, like, curious about this stuff being influenced a certain way, I'm like, sure, yeah, you can make your own decisions, but also, like, you should make your decision fully informed. And I think it's the job of people to tell you that that's not healthy or right or good in the long term. Maybe in the short term, it feels good. I feel like there are a lot of things that are not good that, like, work in the short term, but long term, it's just like, I can't imagine a world in which that relationship is fulfilling and satisfying and loving if, like, you're not fully chosen every day. Do you know what I mean? Am I so offbeat?
Abby
I could be offbeat, but, like, I think so. I think that the counter argument that I hear often for a number of different things like this is like, well, no one's getting hurt or no one. Like, they're like, everyone is agreeing and everyone's happy with the arrangement. The thing that I think about is how many eyes now are open to this, like, being a very pos. Like, as being like an option that are being influenced by it. Like, I'm thinking about, like, I mean, think about how many middle schoolers and high schoolers are on social media.
Abigail
Right.
Abby
And that therefore we know the influence that has on shifting, like, cultural trends and totally, like, lifestyle ideals. And I think when the narrative is so one sided, that's where it gets dangerous.
Abigail
Right. And so, yeah, it's always in a positive way.
Abby
Everyone is allowed, like you said, free will. Do whatever you want to do. Share whatever you want to share. Right. When it feels scary to share the other side of it, you're not getting an honest representation. I can speak to, like, amazing benefits of monogamy.
Abigail
Right. Like, long term.
Blake
But you seem like the odd one out to say that, like, online it seems like we're being controversial to be like, we actually love non.
Abigail
Right. Like, why are we scared to talk about this? That it's. That is like the taboo and maybe not the best way. And I think it's just, yeah, it's like, okay, we don't want to ruffle feathers or like, stuff on people's toes, but also when we do have a platform and it's like, hey, we've been talking about some of these things that are big. It's like, I don't know, it's just a shift in culture that we're. That I had noticed and I was
Abby
like, dang, you made a really interesting point too in connecting, like, the implications of this on, like, the feminist movement too.
Abigail
Yeah. I just am so podcast. Yeah. Like, I am a very classical feminist. Like, yeah, I want girls to have. They're fully equal in value and wanted them to do everything that a man can do if they want. Yeah. I think it's just this is more so a conversation of, like, you just deserve the best and you deserve better. And, like, you deserve to be felt, like you're enough. And sometimes I feel like there is this level of protection that women, they tell themselves, like, all these lies, and it's like, well, if you can't get it from me, then go get it from someone else. But, like, still come home to me at the end of the day. And, like, that's just not. That's not the point of a relationship. The point of a relationship isn't just to fulfill your sexual desires. Point of a relationship is to, like, walk hand in hand with someone and, like, experience life. And when crap hits the fan, you know that you are, like, with this person. And when you say and think and do horrible, ugly things and that person sees those things in you, they say still choose to love you because they know that you are valuable and enough just in that. And I just feel like the, like, the dynamic in some of these, the sentiment of, like, open marriage is just that there's. You're not being chosen. I don't know. Like, we can exercise self control.
Abby
Well said. Doesn't Arthur Brook said he was, like, denying yourself, like, from every impulse that you feel is what separates us from, like, an iguana or, like, from an animal.
Abigail
Yeah.
Blake
From, like, animals.
Abby
Yeah. And he's like, we have this part of our brain that other animals don't have. It's like, you're prefront. I mean, do. Do other animals have prefrontal cortexes? I want to say no, because that's their decision making. And I feel like animals are just, like, on survival. And he was like, basically, that's what separates you from an animal is the ability to tell yourself no. And I feel like that is. I mean, it's a. Discipline is a good thing. It's not like, totally. And restraint.
Abigail
But, yeah.
Abby
It's not popular. It's not trendy.
Abigail
Right.
Abby
It's not gonna make any splashy headlines. Right. But I do think they'll get you the farthest, probably in life.
Abigail
Probably.
Abby
Who knows? Hey, I've never been in a throuple.
Abigail
Me neither. I never will be. Never will. I can confidently say I'll never be.
Abby
Yeah. I mean, that would be me being cheated on and.
Abigail
Yeah.
Abby
Like, actually, that would be me.
Abigail
Be a whole different conference contacting a lawyer.
Blake
Yeah.
Abigail
Like, wait a minute.
Abby
This is not. That would be really messy.
Abigail
Yeah. I'm trying to think if I have any more thoughts on this, because I feel like I've had so many thoughts last two weeks. I was trying to, like, condense them into a list, but, yeah. I just like, oh. For women, I'm like, just demand more. Yeah, you should demand more.
Abby
Yeah.
Abigail
And that's commitment. Okay. That's commitment, and that's all I got. Well, polyamory is a great topic. Ready to sound off? I'm ready for the. I'm ready for this to reach the wrong side of the Internet, and you can come for me. And guess what? I don't care.
Abby
I don't care.
Abigail
I don't care.
Blake
I thought you were about to try and segment this or, like, segment.
Abigail
I was gonna segue it, but I had to say that, too.
Abby
That's one of my fears, Sam, is that when people are playing by different rules, I always say this.
Abigail
It's okay.
Abby
When people play by different rules, I'm like, I'm afraid to enter that game because I have my own rule book of how I operate in, like, a public space. How I operate in a private space. When people have different rule books, I'm kind of like, ah, yeah, you're willing to go lower than I'll go. And so therefore, that's just a humbling place to be.
Abigail
Okay. How was I gonna segue that? So, polyamory, why do you have to segue so? There are many partners. We've been to many places.
Blake
It is a bit now. It was like. It was advice of, like, you guys need to segue better.
Abigail
Now it's a bit now it's like, how are we gonna make this connect? We're talking about travel.
Abby
Having grabbed it by the neck. Just move it.
Blake
Move it over here.
Abby
Okay, let's get a little bit off the hot seat. How about that?
Abigail
Something a little safer.
Abby
My stomach's hurting worse.
Abigail
I feel relieved.
Abby
I feel relieved. Our group chat on my chest. Our group chat was popping off the other night.
Abigail
Yeah, it was. I was glad I was able to talk to you guys about this.
Abby
I just feel really happy to be in the know about things.
Abigail
Oh, yeah. That's crazy.
Abby
I was like, wow, that's crazy.
Abigail
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Abby
Okay. And know what's crazy is that we are leaving tomorrow for Hawaii. Six hours on a plane. And I'm not stressed about traveling with my kids.
Blake
Right.
Abby
Which I couldn't say was the fact for probably about two years of my life.
Abigail
Sure.
Abby
The hardest time to travel with kids, I will say, is right where you're entering.
Blake
I'm going on a flight in a month.
Abby
9 months to 18 months.
Abigail
Agreed, Abbie. The hardest ages, that's a hard one.
Abby
And honestly, at that point, I don't have a lot of hacks for you, but I will try my best.
Blake
I was actually gonna take notes.
Abby
No, no, you can follow these, but then you just pray. Yeah. But we definitely had some horror stories before we got to this place of more comfort. Of course, this doesn't mean that we can't be knocked on our butt again. And that's the thing about parenting that you just have to really just accept.
Abigail
Right.
Abby
They'll humble you at any given time.
Abigail
It's actually never get comfortable.
Abby
Right.
Blake
Of course.
Abby
And so unfortunately, I am a little comfortable. But we all have had our horror stories with kids and traveling. And you know what? You make it, everyone survives. And that's what you just have to remember when it starts getting rough. We're going to get there and we're going to be glad we did this. And if we're not, we're never going to do this again.
Abigail
Exactly.
Abby
Exactly.
Abigail
Exactly.
Abby
So we asked you guys, what were some of your horror stories when it comes to traveling And Kaylee, is it Casey?
Abigail
Kaylee. Casey. That's cute.
Abby
Said grade 8 sailing trip. Got my second ever period and was not prepared.
Abigail
No.
Abby
Your school went on a sailing trip?
Abigail
Yeah. Wait a minute. Where you live?
Blake
Well, she's in grade Eight. So not America. Oh, we say eighth grade.
Abigail
Oh, Abby, you're so right. Oh, my gosh. Thank you, Kaylee. If you're an international listener, please follow up.
Abby
We should do a whole segment on period stories because I have some.
Abigail
I would love to talk about my dude.
Abby
I never. I never tracked mine for like a long time.
Abigail
Okay.
Abby
And I was always surprised.
Abigail
Let's do. Let's do. Let's add that to the list. Okay. I'm actually. I have a whole. I'm in a whole new world of the flex disc, so.
Abby
Oh, yes.
Abigail
We can have a whole episode about ladies. Yes. Okay. Mimi McNulty said, the guy next to me took his shoes and socks off on a nine hour flight and it smelled like farts and eggs.
Abby
Do you guys take your shoes off on the airplane?
Abigail
No, I untie my laces, take my shoes off.
Blake
I do too. Always have socks.
Abigail
Always have socks. Oh, my goodness.
Blake
Never without socks.
Abby
Now it's kind of game changing because I used to never wear sandals to the airport because you had to take it your shoes off. And I was like, I don't want to be walking barefoot on the airport floor. But now you get to keep your shoes on.
Abigail
Oh. So that's kind of nice.
Blake
I think. I still just don't like to walk in sandals that much.
Abigail
Yeah.
Blake
It's long 10 shoes for travel days.
Abigail
I agree. I agree. Addie. Yeah, I. Yeah. Socks off is nine hour flight. Alexa said she took a laxative traveling internationally. Why would you do that? Only toilet was whole with no door at train station. A hole with no door just exploding.
Abby
Not on a travel day.
Abigail
Oh, my gosh. Oh.
Abby
Kelly Best says a drunk man fell next to us on a plane and peed all over his seat.
Abigail
Oh. She said, on our honeymoon.
Abby
On our honeymoon. What is it with.
Abigail
Sometimes I think it's funny.
Abby
A lot of people order alcohol from the, like, little cart on the plane. I just think that's so funny.
Abigail
Yeah.
Abby
I'm like, you want that little.
Abigail
I don't know. I feel like people that have anxiety do it a lot.
Abby
Oh, I should do that.
Abigail
Take the edge off.
Abby
You guys, my flight anxiety has gotten really bad.
Abigail
Really?
Abby
Yes.
Abigail
You should talk to your therapist about that.
Abby
I cried on the way to la. It's one of those things that doesn't hit me until I'm in the air. And then I'm like. And we hit turbulence.
Abigail
Oh.
Abby
Like it's not like it's. And then I. And unfortunately, I feel like I'm in a plane a lot. Yeah. And then I'm like, why is this getting so much worse? Matt's like, it's. He's like, it's getting. Yeah. I'm like, I know. It's really bad if we're without the kids. Like, if we had to go to LA without, like for literally less than 24 hours and we were not with the kids and we hit some bad turbulence between. It's a less than a one hour flight. The flight attendant fell down. Wow. So I'm like, not trying to be dramatic. It was like, bad. He fell down with a tray of drinks and like.
Abigail
Dang.
Abby
Yeah. And so then they put on the red emergency light. The captain started talking to us. Yeah. And he was so sweet, bless his heart. He was like, there's nothing to worry about. Anyway, I was like, sure that we were crashing.
Abigail
Really? Yeah.
Blake
Does it have to do with being pregnant? Has it gotten worse? Being pregnant?
Abby
Yeah. So the first time I felt flight anxiety was when I was pregnant with Griffin.
Abigail
Yeah.
Abby
And then it's just continued to get worse.
Abigail
Yeah.
Abby
My stakes are too high if I die.
Abigail
Yeah. I get that when I'm. But the kids aren't with me and it's just me and Caleb. I do get anxious a little bit. Yeah.
Abby
And I don't like it when I'm with the kids, but it's way, way worse.
Abigail
At least they're not alone.
Abby
Yeah. So I told Matt. I was like, I might need to get.
Blake
We all die together.
Abigail
Exactly.
Abby
Why is that so dark and like, that just shows where my head's going, though.
Abigail
Yeah. Maybe you can talk to your doctor about getting like some. Just Xanax or something for a plane.
Abby
I'm not even kidding.
Abigail
They do that.
Abby
I literally will because it's actually not when I'm pregnant. But like. Yeah, or don't medicate now. Then I'll probably get pregnant again. So in about five years, I'll take care of this. Yeah. I'm thinking about so many things. I'll get boobs. I'll take care of my anxiety later on. Okay.
Abigail
Wow. Moving right along.
Abby
Don't worry about me. Lucy says our baggage, including our costumes, didn't turn up for a dance competition.
Abigail
That would be so stressful.
Abby
I have a theory about that. But we'll. We'll go.
Abigail
I think you need to share the fear. The theory.
Abby
The theory is one of my hacks.
Abigail
Oh, okay. We'll leave then. Okay. Olivia said I have a fear of flying, so it's always a horror story. Relatable, literally.
Abby
Why I hate this about myself. I love Traveling.
Abigail
Yeah.
Abby
This is just inhibiting me. Just a single tear down my cheek, and other people are sleeping.
Abigail
I knew she was we.
Blake
When we were flying home from Rhode Island. Abby was reading her book. And then she closes it.
Abby
I close it because I can't read when it's really bad.
Blake
But I was like, oh, no, I'm sorry.
Abby
Just like, I am safe. Everything's.
Blake
I'm like, did it make you feel more anxious that the girl next to us was very anxious and then got off the plane?
Abby
Oh, I'm so glad that she wasn't there because I was like, girl, do it for me.
Blake
Yeah, get off the plane for me.
Abigail
I am the opposite. I fall asleep. I'm like, oh, me.
Blake
Instantly.
Abigail
Immediately, that white noise.
Abby
I fall asleep when it's smooth, but then as soon as it gets bumpy, I'm like.
Blake
Like.
Abby
Matt tried to move up my armrest to put his arm on my leg, and I was like, I need that. I needed to grip it.
Abigail
I don't wake up unless it, like, jostles my head. You know, there is one time where I was sleeping with my head. My head back, and then the bump hit and my head flew forward and I woke up, and I was like, whoa.
Blake
Yesterday, Blake showed me a picture on the plane with Brielle. She's on me, and I'm asleep.
Abigail
Tay Leper said overnight bus in Thailand had to share a bed with a mom and her three kids. Oh, not your mom. A mom and her three kids. That's. That's trooper status.
Abby
Girl, that is intense travel status.
Abigail
I've never even heard of that happening.
Abby
Only in Thailand.
Abigail
Maybe. Maybe.
Abby
Alina Mary says was bored on a flight, tried to do a handstand in the airplane bathroom door flung open. Why don't get crazy. Crazy and playing bathroom. Just go to the bathroom.
Abigail
Just go to the bathroom and get out. I'm sorry, are you really short? Because there's no way I could even get my hands on the floor.
Abby
Think of other things to entertain you on a fly less dream.
Abigail
Going upside down, putting your feet where all the men's pee is. Oh, my gosh. That's hilarious. Okay.
Abby
I bet your flight attendant was like, this is fine.
Abigail
This is. She needs to be arrested.
Abby
This is why I hate my job.
Abigail
I literally. Amanda said a tour bus caught fire on the only bridge in and out of the Florida Keys. Standstill traffic for three plus hours. Oh, man.
Abby
Hopefully everyone was okay.
Abigail
That feels like a never ending situation. And then you're like, well, I didn't prepare for this. I'M stranded on a long boat with no food, no water, limited gas, gotta pee. What do you do?
Abby
They're on a boat.
Abigail
I'm sorry. Car.
Abby
Yeah, the car. Because you could run out of gas. You could just turn off your car,
Abigail
turn off your car and have a party outside.
Abby
Maggie Nay says I puked a blue slushie outside the window of the car, but it was a cop behind and I got a ticket. What?
Abigail
Why did he give you a ticket? It's just mean. He said I'm gonna kick her while she's down.
Abby
It's not illegal.
Abigail
Yeah.
Abby
What?
Abigail
That's just rude. Amy said forgot. Forgot everyone's underwear. Walmart run.
Abby
I'm sure I've done that. Honestly, Walmart delivery goes a lot of places.
Abigail
Is that one of your hacks though? That.
Abby
Well, part of one of mine, yeah.
Abigail
Okay.
Abby
Walmart delivery is great.
Abigail
Perfect.
Abby
Sarah Johansen Hannison. I accidentally bought two one way tickets to NYC instead of a round trip.
Abigail
Oh, no.
Abby
I think that's the way to do it.
Blake
No, she bought them both one way to New York. No back.
Abigail
No ticket back.
Blake
But yes, that is one of the.
Abby
That is that hack that I didn't write down. Only buy single leg of the journey.
Abigail
Agreed. Tickets. Agreed. I never buy around.
Blake
The only airline that it benefits you on is allegiant. You get a discount every other airline. There's no discount for round trip.
Abigail
Agreed. Agreed.
Abby
It's a great. And it just makes it so much more messy if anything has to change with your travel plan.
Abigail
Absolutely. My husband and I went on our honeymoon not knowing there was an age requirement. Oh my. For the hotel there was an age requirement of 25 plus. We were 22 at the time and had to sleep in her car the night of her wedding. Drove from Georgia to Florida night of our wedding to get on a cruise the next day.
Abby
That happens. Happened to Blake and I.
Blake
Happened to us in Chicago.
Abigail
I actually think that might have happened to us too. But somehow we got around it.
Blake
Blake and I were 18. You had to be 21. So we had to find a hotel that would let 18 year olds.
Abigail
Oh my gosh. Discrimination.
Abby
Yeah.
Blake
I booked the hotel, but I couldn't. I couldn't get in there.
Abigail
Pay for it.
Blake
Yep. Don't let me. Stranded in Chicago.
Abby
They act like it's for safety, but I'm like, if you're both adults. 18. Yeah.
Blake
If you're both around the same age,
Abby
like you're both young, you're both children.
Blake
Yeah.
Abigail
Oh, they're thinking of like trafficking stuff I.
Blake
Well, probably. Well, I don't know. Cuz they probably wouldn't be. The. Like the person being trafficked probably isn't the one booking the hotel room.
Abigail
That's so true. I just assumed it was always like a hoopla thing, like keep the kids and the parties out.
Abby
I don't know.
Abigail
Maybe we should Google that. Why is that a rule?
Abby
That's what they told us. They said for safety.
Blake
I think primarily to avoid legally unenforceable contracts with minors, manage liability for potential underage drinking in rooms with minibars and reduce risk of property damage.
Abigail
Just take the alcohol out. That makes sense. No, that makes a lot of sense.
Abby
After we get married, we were driving to a new country and my father in law was also flying in for a few days. He went ahead and we spontaneously. He went on ahead and we spontaneously sent a suitcase with him. Which was really helpful. Just that inside the suitcase was my passport.
Abigail
The amount of times I've done stuff like that is. It's just the most stomach sinking feeling like, what did I just do?
Abby
I hate that.
Abigail
Oh my gosh. I was given the wrong room key and keyed into a couple's room. One word. Nakedness.
Abby
She was given the wrong room key.
Abigail
Oh, that's a new year. Unlocked.
Abby
So bad on the hotel.
Abigail
So bad.
Abby
You guys, I. When we're in Disney, we're switching hotels every day. I got lost in the last hotel because it was literally a maze. The Grand Californian is a maze. And I was one digit off. Like, but it was the middle digit, so I was nowhere near where I was supposed to be. Yeah, but I. First of all, the. I had sent Matt there already. One time. He's knocking on it. And then in my head, I still hadn't corrected that. That was not our room number. I'm knocking and I'm trying to use my key and I'm like, why is my key not working? Still not thinking. Like, how would you not at this point when your key is not working? And then knocking. And then the moment I realized it, I was like, oh crap, someone's opening the door. And I just ran. I was like, this is a little
Abigail
pregnant girl just running down the hallway.
Abby
It was a housekeeper.
Abigail
That's happened twice to me where someone tried to get in my room.
Abby
Magnus, you're such a child.
Abigail
Yeah, literally, you're like.
Abby
I was scared. I didn't want to get in trouble. I always felt like such an immature. And I was like, I just can't face my problems right now.
Abigail
I know. It just feels so awkward. Like walking into someone in the bathroom. You're like, oh, sorry, gotta run. Don't look at my face. Thank you Shopify, for sponsoring this portion of today's episode. I personally used Shopify for five years when I owned my small clothing business. And it was truly a game changer in running and starting a small business. Starting something new isn't just hard, it's terrifying to be honest. And it can be hard to make that leap of faith. But it also helps when you have a partner like Shopify on your side to help. Shopify is the commerce platform behind millions of businesses around the world. I loved that Shopify had so many plugins, it was compatible with so many different sites. It just was so seamless to grow and customize my business and my shop, which I think really sets Shopify apart. You can get started with your own design studio. With hundreds of ready to use templates. Shopify helps you build a beautiful online store that matches your brand style. They have tons of free and paid templates that you can choose from. So you can really customize your store to make it feel exactly as your brand is. Tackle all those important tasks in one place. From inventory to payments to analytics and more. There's no need to save multiple websites or try to figure out what platform is hosting the tool that you need. Everything is all in one place making your life easier and your business operations smoother. I just want to say that again, it makes your life easier and your business operations smoother. It truly does. It is time to turn those what ifs into with Shopify today. Sign up for your $1 per month trial today at shopify.com Abby go to shopify.com Abby that's shopify.com Abby transitioning from
Abby
travel nightmares Learning from experience. We have probably adopted some travel hacks that we do differently now. And a lot of mine I have learned from failure. So just let me take the fall on it and let me tell it pass on to you please. When it comes to booking your travel from the very get go, set yourself up for success. Book in the morning. I know I've talked about that before on this podcast, but the morning is just. It safeguards you against any type of delays or cancellations. You can react, you can adjust way easier sometimes. Like if it's a nighttime flight, that's your last flight out of the day. What are you gonna do then? Right. You got a hotel. Like all these other things, it's just such a mess. But then also kids are fresher.
Abigail
Yep.
Abby
And you can't really bank on naps. You can't bank on like them being any kind of sane state of mind later on in the day. Like start them off fresh. If you, if that means you have to wake them up really early in the morning. Do that over.
Abigail
Over like a 7pm flight.
Abby
That's so spooky if they get overly
Abigail
tired and they can't fall asleep. Oh, bad news.
Blake
So bad.
Abigail
Yeah.
Abby
My kids don't sleep on the go. That's. That's on me. Yeah, I guess. I don't know. I don't think they would do that. And also when you're booking them, book direct whenever possible. Yeah. And I know that there's, it's tempting to save money. There's other ways to save money when you travel.
Abigail
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Abby
This you will. It also safeguards you against cancellations, delays. Just having an airport Nightmare with children is 10x scarier. Sure. And you're also just gonna end up spending more money anyway when you have to get food at the next airport because it's so expensive at airports. And you're not going to save what you think you're going to say. Just get it direct.
Abigail
Yep.
Abby
Just get direct.
Abigail
Yep. I agree. Direct flights always if you can. Okay, this is actually, I don't do this anymore, but this was a really good hack that Caleb and I did when we were going on our honeymoon. And so if you're like trying to find. This is a budget travel hack. Okay. We looked for cheap flights on skip lagged, which I know here there's a caveat. It's you cannot refund your ticket. You have to be so sure that you're going to be taking this flight. Okay. There's no refunds, no frills, no nothing. But I got extremely cheap international flights when Caleb and I were booking our honeymoon. There are some caveats you have. Do not ever book a hidden city. Our mother in law made that mistake. That's basically like. And they're telling you, hey, you're gonna go to Phoenix, to St. Louis, you have a layover in Phoenix.
Abby
That's what the whole point of skip lagged is though. You know what I mean?
Abigail
No, that's not.
Abby
That's what skip wagging is.
Abigail
That's called a hidden city. I used skip dog for a long, I used it a long time ago. And they never. The first time I ever got offered
Abby
that was this past year real. No, they've had that.
Abigail
Really?
Abby
Yeah.
Abigail
The hidden city thing.
Abby
Yeah, I think so. Yeah. That's, that's what skip. My okay, so, yes, skip lagging is the practice of booking a flight with a layover at your intended destination. So you really off. That's what skip lagging is really. So you get off at a layover rather than booking a direct flight to that city in order to secure a cheaper air fare. That's why it's cheaper, really.
Abigail
But I never did that. I just used it to buy cheaper.
Blake
I didn't even know that was.
Abby
That's what skip lagging is, though.
Abigail
Interesting. Okay, so don't do that. That. Don't do that because, yeah, you'll get. You'll get in trouble with the airlines. So basically, if it's like, hey, we're going to go to St. Louis to Phoenix, they're like, hey, book this flight to Washington, but it has a layover in Phoenix. You'll get off of Phoenix. Don't do that. That's bad. You'll get in trouble. But Caleb and I got extremely cheap tickets on skip, like to international travel. And the trick is, if you go on the website, don't move your mouse. It'll show you the original flight. And then as you're longer on the website, the price continues to go down. It's very interesting. So if you're looking for, like, the cheapest possible flight.
Abby
Wait, say this hack again.
Abigail
Okay, you go on skiplagged.com and you go and you type in your cities that you want to go to.
Abby
What do you move your mouse?
Abigail
Like, don't touch your computer mouse. You don't touch it. Don't click nothing. And just watch the. The price drop. It's like a game. I'm not kidding. It'll show you the original price first. And they think, okay, you'll see the high price, you'll click on it and they'll try to get you to buy the more expensive, expensive ticket. But if you stop and you wait, it drops down and then it shows you the cheaper price. Maybe I shouldn't be recommending.
Blake
How'd you figure that out?
Abigail
Caleb did. I don't know. So, okay, so there's that. But also, Google Flights is much easier and less sketchy. And, you know, I like that.
Abby
Yeah. I'm like, sheesh.
Abigail
I think that's like an actual hack. You know what I mean? It's like kind of like a sneaky thing that people don't normally do. The skip lag thing.
Abby
Does it work on mobile?
Abigail
I would do it on desktop.
Abby
Wow, that is crazy.
Abigail
People are like, what is this? Google Flights is another one that is amazing to help you Find, like, cheap budget flights, and you can go by the day, like, move your mouse along the days of the week, and you can find the cheapest days. That's how I actually pick a lot of times when we go on our trips, I'm like, okay, when I want to go to this city, when's the cheapest time to go? And it shows you the whole year, the cheapest days. So, yeah, there you go.
Abby
I never would have thought of that.
Abigail
I don't do it anymore now, like, flying with kids and stuff is just to. I'm like, I want, like, a safer ticket. But when it was just me and Caleb and we're just bootstrapping, backpacking it up, why not just take a cheap, easy fly? Who cares?
Abby
Wow. Yeah. Test that hack out. Let us know if it works for you. That's a legit hack. Okay. This one is not going to sound that secretive. Okay.
Abigail
Okay.
Abby
But it's my other hack is check everything you can.
Abigail
Yes. I had that on my list.
Abby
And I mean, like, do this to, like, the nth degree. Because with kids, hands are just so precious.
Abigail
Absolutely.
Abby
And I'm actually going to the extent of don't even buy a coffee at the airport.
Abigail
Absolutely.
Abby
You need that hand more than you need the coffee. I swear to you, every time I've done this before, like, when I would do it before, I would get a coffee, and I'm like, this is just a stressor. Yes. I need this hand more than I need this coffee. So, like, don't get coffee. Just keep your hands as free as possible. And I also, with this hack, I want to tell you everything that you can take with kids on any airline for free. Because you're traveling with kids. You can check car seats for free. Check those. Don't carry those through. No. I had people rolling their kids in their car seats, and I was like, oh, my gosh, Just check it. Check it at the front. Don't check it at the gate. Check it at the counter at the front.
Abigail
Yep.
Abby
You can also get free diaper bags. This is in addition to your personal item. So you can check a breast pump for free. Not. Okay, sorry, don't check your diaper bag. Take your diaper bag with you. You can bring that in addition, for free. You can also check strollers. I recommend checking these at the gate. If you're traveling with kids, you can take them through the airport. So the first thing you're gonna check at the counter. Car seats. Carry the stroller with you through. Through the airport, through security. Get to your Gate. Check that at your gate counter. Yep. That is for free as well. You cannot check pack and plays.
Abigail
No.
Abby
For free.
Abigail
No.
Abby
So if you're gonna bring a pack and play, that's gonna be a checked other bag. I would just strongly advise you to find a pack and play at your destination and bring your own sheet for it, because it's kind of gross sometimes. You never know what they're gonna.
Abigail
Right.
Abby
Like, especially Airbnbs. I literally went to an Airbnb. They're like, we have a pack and play. I checked in advance. There was blood all over the pack and play. And I was like, so glad I brought my own sheet. And I flipped it over. I was like, that is. It was dried, but gross. And your breast pumpkin also doesn't count as your personal item. It's a medical device. Right. So, yeah, those are things that I didn't know when I was early on traveling with kids.
Abigail
Yeah.
Abby
But your hands are your most prized possession in the airport.
Abigail
Yeah, I had. I had one like that written down. I said, carry on one bag. That's it. Check everything else. So I even combine my diaper bag and my. Yeah.
Abby
Personal. Now that my kids can carry their own backpacks, I, like, let them have their own personal item. Cute.
Abigail
So cute. But it's small. Something that you don't end up having to carry.
Abby
No. And I always tell them, I'm like, if you're bringing that backpack, you're carrying that. I need my hands.
Abigail
Exactly. Also, with the coffee, you're, like, sitting in your seat. It's just gonna get spilled, flown around, especially the baby. You can't do that.
Abby
It's not worth it.
Abigail
No. Well, then.
Abby
And I take coffee seriously, so.
Abigail
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Abby
You should know that.
Abigail
Okay. That was my. That was my second one. I'll just skip to my third one. This. I also did this. And actually, my mom and I were talking about this. This is a hack. She does as well. She did this for us as kids. I did this as an adult planning my outfits in advance. And I'd roll them up and put them in a Ziploc bag. So all my outfits are sectioned out. And my mom did that for all of our kids, too. She's like, it was so easy. Then you have all of your outfits. You know exactly who's who. You write the name on the bag, and you just throw it in their rooms in the drawers, whatever, and go. So just the clothes aren't getting intermixed and getting messed up. And I loved it when we did international travel because it just made, like, I didn't overpack, and I didn't have to think so much about my outfits. Other day, I'd already thought about it. So then when it was like, oh, shower, change really fast, get ready, go out to dinner, it wasn't all this extra time thinking about my outfit. It was already planned. And then also, it was just way easier to pack it all.
Abby
My mom did that with me and Blake and my brother, and she'd have the date even on it.
Abigail
Oh. Like, the day of the trip, we would match. Oh, that's really cute.
Abby
And then we would always. Like, when we got older, we were. Would fight her on it because we wanted our own suitcase, of course. And she's like, no, this is for the first half of the trip and this for the second half. We're like, no.
Abigail
Oh, yeah.
Abby
But no. That's a really good hack.
Abigail
Yeah. Pack those clothes up tightly.
Abby
I don't give myself enough time in advance of packing to do that, but I will strive for that one day. Okay. This one is another one for kids, and I just. I gave myself this freedom. So I just want to. If this gives you permission to give yourself this freedom as well, more power to you. I just say unlimited screen time on travel days.
Abigail
Oh, yeah.
Abby
So, like, we're traveling tomorrow all day. My kids will not have any screens today. We're.
Abigail
We.
Abby
They know that they are going to have so much tomorrow that we just don't need to have any today. But I feel like there's a lot of pressure to think of all these ways to entertain kids on flights, and that's just more stuff to pack. And also, it's not going to. To be as effective usually, as a good old show. And I will. I am packing other activities because it's not gonna. I don't want them to only do that, and I don't want that to thing. But if they're entertained, I'm not gonna be like, your timer's up. If they're entertained, we're gonna just ride with it. And so my advice is to bring headphones, because there's been a lot of times with kids where I'm like, freak. They only have, like, those corded headphones, and a lot of flights don't have TVs. And we've played it out loud, like, quietly, and they have come and told us.
Abigail
Yes. To turn it off. Yes.
Abby
And I'm like, do you know? And I'm like, so then. And then they're not nearly as entertained if they can't hear it. Well, and so bring headphones. Bring the headphones that have Bluetooth and also have a cord in case you're on a flight that like does have a TV or you bring a portable DVD player or some other thing that has that kind of jack though. Yeah. Oh, I guess.
Abigail
Yeah.
Abby
There's some cords too that can go into like iPads and stuff.
Abigail
Yeah. I would also say to DJ have another point.
Abby
I had a list of toys that are fun for planes for kids too.
Abigail
Okay. I'll say something about screen time the next day, plan an outdoor activity. Because when your kids have so much screen time, like with cj, I'm like, okay.
Abby
The next day, squirrely.
Abigail
So squirrely. Because you're on, you're like on a plane.
Abby
Once you make it to your destination, it's like fun time. They're not.
Abigail
So the next day, just play an outdoor activity where they can get all that pent up energy out.
Abby
Yeah, we don't really watch shows when we're. I can't think on a trip either.
Abigail
Yeah, no.
Abby
So it's like just on your travel days. Allow that freedom for yourself if you feel so inclined. Yeah. Here are my fun toys for these are. These were what works for my boys, these little magnet guys. They're on it. I'll actually put links all these on Amazon. These are so dumb. They're these little magnet guys, they have magnets on their hands and on their feet, but everything on the plane is like magnetic. So you can connect them to each other and connect them to like their, the tray table in front of them, their seats. My kids think they're really fun. Okay. Also, this is for kids that don't like to color because if your kids like to color, bring coloring things for heaven's sake. That sounds like a great option. Robot suction cup toys.
Abigail
What?
Abby
Same idea as the magnet guys. But they, if you get a window seat, they suction to the window, their arms and their legs and they stretch out their arms and legs. They think they're really fun.
Abigail
Those water art things, those are good.
Abby
You can just get a little cup of water or you pour some from your water bottle or whatever. They'll also bring an empty water bottle and bring your own water on the planes. That would be what I, I always. That's as soon as you get through security, fill up your water and they love those. They dry quickly and then they can again and it's no mess. And you literally just bring that little notebook and the little water thing, if you know what I'm talking about. You Know if you don't find the link. So you know what I'm talking about. You just use water colors.
Abigail
Yeah, it's cute.
Abby
Last thing is, oh, stickers are really good on.
Abigail
Stickers are really good.
Abby
Get the puffy ones. They're not actually really hard to pick off. And recently flashcards have been really good for like Griffin. He is so into dinosaurs and so flashcards really, because he's like literally studies them like he wants to know and they're more easy to travel with and fun.
Abigail
I would. This is something that CJ loves cars and he's always loved cars. And so I was like, I'll bring his favorite cars in the plane. Don't bring anything with wheels. They will lose them because they fall down the floor and then they roll down the length of the plane and you're like, sorry, buddy. Your favorite house.
Abby
Say bye. Bye.
Abigail
Don't do cars. I, I, some of these I had a hard time Addie. Like with a nine month to an 18 month old, the activities are so different because they can't do stickers. They can't do. They're not entertained by screens. So I think I just always remembered like getting CJ up and just walking him down the aisles and I would just take him to the back and like the airplane area and just stand by the bathroom. Stand by the bathroom.
Blake
Brielle would enjoy like those busy books, you know, where there's just like things you can like. She's so like, doesn't need to be entertained. Like if there's just something in her hands, like she's entertained. Totally good with those.
Abigail
She'll love snacks. Oh gosh. Yeah. Just bring a big old thing of puffs.
Blake
Yeah, she's going to eat them the whole time.
Abigail
That's really good, Abby. Those are a lot of good, A lot of good trips. Also like the little mini Magna tiles. Those are cute.
Abby
The mini Magna tiles are great.
Abigail
Really great. Yeah. Anything magnet. I bet Brielle would love mini magnets.
Abby
I should have added that to my list. I'm adding that now.
Abigail
That was a really good one. Those are really good. Okay, this is another one. This is for like parents. You need to have enough diapers, formula, snacks and food for a emergency travel day. So don't just. You had that on there.
Abby
That's my next one.
Abigail
Don't just pack enough for a lot of plane time. Pack enough where it's like if there's a delay, if there's something you're gonna have, like I would pack maybe four bottles of formula for One flight. Even if it's like a. You know, you have your bottle going up and your bottle going down. I'd pack two extra things of formula for just in case you get delayed, because you don't want to be delayed in an airport. No formula, like, that'd be scary. So if that applies to you, that's that. But when you get there, deliver all your goods to the house.
Abby
Buy diapers at the destination.
Abigail
Buy your diapers, your big old cans of formula if you need it, your snacks, your. Your food, anything extra. Even like your shampoo and conditioner. I sometimes will add that in the delivery. Anything that you just. Yeah, don't pack it.
Blake
We're going on a cruise in July, so it's like, buy everything, get it delivered. Da da. I'm like, I have to pack it. I have to pack seven days plus worth of formula. I have to pack seven days plus worth of diapers. I'm like, do I pack it here? Do I get it in Florida?
Abigail
No, just do it once. Pack it here, pack it here and just pay for an extra bag and just have one bag of stuff. Literally.
Blake
Just baby. Baby items.
Abigail
Totally.
Abby
Seriously.
Abigail
That's, like the one travel exception. I'm like, dang. No.
Blake
And that's all my family does, is cruises. I'm like, we don't go to a destination. And then if I'm going home, my mom just gets everything I need.
Abigail
Yeah, same. It is nice. When I go home, I don't have to bring anything.
Abby
Yeah, that was my number four was buy diapers at your destination. They take up a lot of luggage space. And then you might not have. It's really hard to figure how many you're gonna need.
Abigail
Right.
Abby
And then you might end up having to buy a pack anyway. And then you're like, like, oh, traveling extra.
Abigail
Yeah.
Abby
Yeah. My other hack with kids is that I just find we have so much more success if we get an Airbnb than, like, a hotel room. Now, this was specific. When you have multiples in specific. If one of those multiples is a baby, I think we're in a different place now where we're all going to share a hotel room and it's like, totally fine.
Abigail
Yeah.
Abby
But before, when everyone has different sleep. Need sleep schedules, it's really nice to have a little bit more space to spread out. But also a kitchen where you can, like, get groceries delivered. Walmart plus, I love Walmart delivery, like, so much. They're everywhere and they don't charge you more if you, like, are in a new location. Right. And so get it sent there. Get their milk, like, whatever they need, like, just sent to your place.
Blake
It's.
Abby
It just also helps you feel, like a lot more stable. I don't know. With kids and traveling, it can feel like with. When it's just you and your spouse, like, it's just like, yeah, we'll sleep on a couch. And it's like, no big deal. But I felt like having, like, more of a place to go that felt like a home base.
Abigail
Yeah. You can wash the bottles, wash the toys, wash. You know what I mean?
Abby
Yeah.
Abigail
Wash the clothes in a sink if you need to. Not crammed in a hotel room.
Abby
You have more chance of there being a bathtub too. I remember that being an issue with the babies. I don't like showering with my baby either. I felt like it was so dangerous. They were like a little wet pig. I was like, I'm gonna drop you.
Abigail
I sit on. I would sit on the floor.
Abby
Oh, my gosh.
Abigail
Yeah. Which felt gross on my butt. But I'm like, you know, here we go. You do what you gotta do.
Abby
Yeah. Matt can shower with them, but for me, I just was like, I'm so slippery. Sitting down is good. Yeah, but that would be like. A lot of hotels only have showers, whereas Airbnb is a house. There's usually at least one tub, right?
Abigail
Totally. It's a good hack. You get four pairs of shoes, max.
Abby
Max. Oh, I was gonna say two max.
Abigail
Oh, really? Yeah. Oh, shoot. Maybe this is me. I'll skip this one.
Blake
Kids.
Abby
Or for me, one closed toed. One open toed. Yeah.
Abigail
Kids get one closed, one open. Me as an adult, I get one nice night dress shoe.
Blake
Yes.
Abigail
That all my night outfits go with. I get my workout tennis shoe that I'm gonna wear on the plane. And I get a casual day shoe, which might be like a walking tennis shoe or like a fashion day shoe and then maybe a flip flop.
Blake
So you got three. I don't have to, like, daily. That's just sandal.
Abigail
See? Yeah, but like, okay, you're a little
Blake
more fashionable than I am.
Abby
You know what I do?
Abigail
If you're walking around the city and stuff, I mean, you're wearing like a cute outfit during the day. I'm not gonna wear my hoka and I'm not gonna wear my, like, heel for night out. So you get like a casual, comfy walking day shoe, but you don't get, like a different shoe for every night outfit. And my mom even goes so far as to say, put those shoes in Your carry on and don't put them in your checked bag. Then you can put all the clothes you want in your carry on. But she doesn't have children, so that her carry on looks very different than mine.
Abby
See, I don't even do a carry on anymore. I need my hands.
Abigail
Yeah, but she would put them in her backpack, like her personal item.
Abby
Oh, wow.
Abigail
Yeah.
Abby
That inventory is a little too valuable right now.
Abigail
I know, I know.
Abby
So we're gonna go carry on this conversation just a little bit longer on our Patreon. Thank you. To those that have subscribed to that. That's really exciting. And have joined that community over there. It already feels like, like, just like a fun addition where we can.
Abigail
Yes.
Abby
You know, dig a little deeper.
Abigail
Yeah.
Abby
Feel a little freer.
Abigail
Yep.
Abby
So we'll carry this on then. We'll be right back.
Abigail
This portion of today's episode is sponsored by Better Help. May is mental health awareness month and a time to open up the conversation, break down the stigma, and prioritize taking care of our mental well being just as much as our physical health. It's also a reminder that you don't have to go through anything alone because with today's sponsor, BetterHelp, there's someone who, who's always with you. Someone who's trained to listen, which is so important. Everyone in their life at some point is going to go through hard things or have to learn how to manage hard things. When Caleb and I first got married, we went to therapy for a little while and it was just really helpful to have a third party, unbiased opinion and have them give insight into what was going on in our lives at the time. Better Help makes therapy accessible wherever you are, whether online or through the app. It can be really hard to go in person sometimes and find a good therapist in person. You work, you're busy. The online access that Better Help creates is really a game changer. Take the quiz and get matched with the licensed therapist quickly. And you can switch anytime at no extra cost if it's not the right fit. 82% of clients actually recommend their therapist, which is a really high success rate. So go ahead and click the link in the description or go to betterhelp.com always to get 10% off your first month of therapy because no one should have to go through anything alone. Better Help here with you. Ask, ask, ask Abby.
Abby
Okay, we're back and we are ready to listen to you guys because we've done enough talking. We really have. And so let's go to our Voicemails. If you guys also want to call in, it's a really fun thing that we've done since the very beginning here. You can call 602-456-9690 and leave a voicemail for us, and we will listen to it live on the podcast and then answer it, respond to it, whatever it may be. The flow is yours.
Abigail
Hi, friends. My name's Maddie. I was just calling because I am just dying to know what you guys
Abby
would make for girl dinner.
Abigail
For example, mine is usually a Ritz
Abby
cracker or, like, a handful of Ritz
Abigail
crackers with some cheese on top of
Abby
them and some, like, chocolate chips.
Abigail
Chips on the side. And maybe a cheese stick if I'm really feeling cheesy.
Abby
So I would love to know what
Abigail
you guys make when you're just like, what do I got? I'm hungry.
Abby
Anyway, thanks for your podcast. Bye.
Abigail
Bye.
Abby
You're good at this.
Abigail
Yeah, Maria, I'm with you, girl. My girl dinner is just a boiled noodle with pesto and just smothered in parmesan cheese. Yeah, that's my girl dinner. That's actually similar to the dinner my mom would make us growing up. It was like, late night. Yeah. She would just bowl some pasta, and we wouldn't put butter on it. We just put parmesan cheese. Oh. Just plain noodles with a little parm. Super dry. We loved it. It still hits every time. So, yeah, it's noodles. I do. I jazz it up. Make a little more fancy with some pesto.
Abby
I'm sorry. I. I like man dinners. I only eat man dinners. Like, I love some protein. I need a big protein. I need big portions. I need there to be a lot of protein. And. No, I. I can't. I'm sorry.
Abigail
I don't want big protein. I want big carb.
Abby
I'm too hungry.
Abigail
Get a big carb. It's just delicious.
Abby
Hungry. I really don't think if you gave me, I don't know how much noodles I would have to eat to get full. Abigail. I'm not kidding. It's scary. Yeah.
Abigail
I mean, I eat a lot of it. I do enjoy every bite.
Abby
I'm sorry. I'm a man dinner, but I can talk about my favorite snacks.
Blake
Say, give us a good snack.
Abby
If I'm going to have a snack, I will have a chopstick.
Abigail
Oh, my gosh. You man protein.
Abby
A cheese stick or a baby bell cheese. And then I've been really liking the Catalina crunch protein mix from.
Abigail
Yeah, Yum.
Abby
Costco.
Blake
That is good.
Abby
Maybe a fruit Maybe a dried mango if we're feeling crazy fruit.
Abigail
I'm not eating a fruit on my girl dinner.
Abby
Girl snack. And it's still a platter. It's a snack.
Abigail
My girl snack. Maybe be like some yogurt.
Abby
Yeah, yogurt.
Blake
I saw someone the other day that said I genuinely don't believe anyone actually likes yogurt.
Abigail
Oh, I love it.
Blake
I feel that.
Abby
Really?
Blake
I eat it because I'm like, I should eat it. I'm not, like, craving it.
Abby
You need more toppings.
Abigail
You need the different yogurt.
Blake
I do. I do. Granola. Chocolate granola.
Abigail
No, you need to get the little cashew chocolate almond trail mix from Trader Joe's.
Abby
Sweeten your yogurt.
Abigail
You just need to put some chocolate in there.
Blake
I get vanilla.
Abby
Oh, okay.
Abigail
You just need to put some chocolate in it.
Blake
It's good. It doesn't taste bad. It's not like I'm not like, I'm gonna have yogurt every single morning because it's so yummy.
Abby
Yeah.
Abigail
This is my girl snack. Sorry to change the.
Blake
No, you're good.
Abigail
You're right, Addy. Yeah. It's ranch dip and some potato chips. That's my girl snack. Gosh.
Blake
Wavy, wavy potato chips.
Abigail
Potato chips.
Blake
Okay.
Abigail
Potato chips with the ranch dip seasoning packet in full fat. Sour cream.
Blake
See, I got a different one. I got a different wavy potato chips. Name brand lay's lays and the Highland. Is that the brand sour cream and onion dip that they don't sell here?
Abby
Unfortunately, they don't sell in.
Blake
In this part of the. The country. Highland.
Abby
We're calling you out. Yeah, I can't buy it.
Blake
My grandma brings it every time we go, and she. And she brings, like, double bags and a bunch of. Because all the kids, we just. Blake's like, right. I don't get it back home.
Abigail
I know. Literally. Or the French onion dip is also really good.
Abby
Oh, that's what I thought we were talking about.
Blake
Oh, sorry. I meant to say French onion dip.
Abigail
Did you mean French onion dip?
Blake
I meant French onion.
Abigail
Yeah. Okay.
Blake
Sorry.
Abigail
Okay, that's. It is better than sour cream and onion, but it's going to hype you up.
Blake
No, no, no. French onion dip. Oh, my gosh.
Abigail
It's so good. Oh, man.
Abby
Just.
Blake
My mouth is watering for that.
Abigail
Okay, who wants to make it on her after this?
Abby
I was thinking about something, and I just lost it.
Abigail
Hey, we should make that green dip again. That was. That was good.
Abby
So good.
Blake
And, like, just an after podcast snack.
Abigail
We should have your mom make us after Podcast snacks every week.
Abby
Mom, make me a snack. Hi Abby. Abby and Addie.
Abigail
My name is Andy.
Abby
I am a new mom to a four week old baby girl and I have loved listening to your guys show in both pregnancy and postpartum. And I wanted to ask you guys,
Abigail
what is one quality about yourselves and
Abby
one quality in your spouse that you hope your children have? Thanks guys. Love listening to you. Bye. I hear the baby. That's really sweet.
Abigail
Yeah. Congratulations on your baby from Caleb. I really want our kids to get his brain. I love the way that his brain works. He's so curious. He's a great question asker. He's like, like the way that he breaks down a. He's a problem solver. It's just so impressive to me. I love watching him work through solutions. So I hope our kids get that and for me, I hope they get. Oh my gosh, this feels like weird to say. I think I appreciate that I'm not like a high anxiety, high anxious person and I, I appreciate about myself that I'm going with the flow. So I hope my kids can take that. Like I'm particularly. I'm thinking about like things rolling off their backs. Like, I don't want them to like take things so personally or get stressed out about little situations. Yeah, I think that's. Yeah.
Abby
Gosh, this is so deep actually.
Abigail
I know. I was like, oh, this is another thing. Let me think deeply about this.
Abby
I really hope that they get Matt's friendliness. I feel like Matt is just like a. He's a golden retriever. He will talk to anybody. And like he was so good at like, he's a good includer of like I even think about in high school just like the types of people he would be friends with and maybe like people looking out for people that didn't have friends. I hope that my kids would do that too. Sweet for me. Gosh. I think the scariest thing is like, I'm like, I hope you don't get that.
Abigail
I don't know.
Abby
I'm like, let's see. I hope that they're like this and I don't know that I hope that I can be like, like work on this too. More so. But also just like be very like selfless and generous, like go out of their way for other people. Because I just think the world needs more of that.
Abigail
Totally. You're a good example.
Abby
Make yourself uncomfortable for other people. And that's just something that isn't popular. But I do think it's needed. Look out for your neighbor.
Blake
Yeah, I was gonna say kind of along the same lines. Blake, I'd love to. For her to get his brain in the way that he thinks through and processes things and just, like, really wants to learn, because I don't think I'm necessarily in that same boat. So I really love that. He just really wants to understand. It's not like, oh, that's a fact. Cool. He wants to understand why that. How that happened to become that way. So I think that's really cool. And then for me, I think kind of going off your lines of friendliness. I'm just, like, the more outgoing side of me. I love Blake, but I. I hope Brielle doesn't get the introverted side. I want her to be extroverted. If she is, I'll still love her, but I hope she's more extroverted and is, like, having has good friends. Blake has good friends, but I'm like, just spends a lot of time with people.
Abby
I did hear the advice. I hear a lot of moms say, like, are you shy? Or they're shy and, like, labeling kids too early with, like, being shy. I don't know why. That's like, something we're so comfortable with. Like, not that being shy is a bad thing, but they're hearing that. And it also can just, like. Like, it's scary as a kid to be around adults and to try. Everything is new, and, like, we can expect there to be some caution or, like, trepidation. We don't need to label it as shy.
Abigail
Totally.
Abby
And so I feel like someone said, like, don't say, don't ask. Like, label your kid as shy in front of them.
Abigail
That's good.
Abby
And I think that's good advice. That's good.
Abigail
And I feel like you and Blake are, like, the perfect. You guys are, like, the perfect balance.
Blake
Yeah. I would be like, we're kind of like opposites, but we.
Abby
I'm texting her.
Blake
Go well together.
Abby
Hi, Abby. I just love your show. My question for you is, what is your go to freezer meals to take to your friends? I have a friend who's finishing chemo for their brain cancer this week, and I'd love to stock their freezer. So at least she gave me some good suggestions other than lasagna. Thank you all so much.
Abigail
I've actually never brought a freezer meal, but my friends, after we were. After we had Vivian, they brought soup in a big, big pot and put it in my freezer, and it was the best. It was a chicken chili, which froze really well. I wouldn't do anything with noodles. I would say something that has, like, a bean, more of a chili vibe was really good. And I just threw it in our fridge for a couple days when I knew we wanted it in advance, and it thawed out, and it was delicious.
Blake
Mmm.
Abby
I'd say frozen breakfast burritos. No one thinks about breakfast when you.
Abigail
Yeah, it's true.
Abby
Postpartum. And those are so good because you also don't have to, like, do this long thawing session. They're individual, and you just go straight from the freezer to the microwave. I linked that on the last one. So revisit the last episode. I think that's, like, the best thing. And I've made that for friends. Postpartum, too.
Abigail
Yeah.
Blake
Yeah.
Abigail
Okay. Fun, you guys. Thank you guys so much for leaving a voicemail. And are we gonna do Always Hungry? Yeah, that was perfect. That was a great transition from voicemails. And now Always Hungry. We love to share our recipes with you guys, what we're making this week. And, yeah, you have a good recipe you like to share?
Abby
I just have been reintroduced to banana bread for, like, the 20th time, but I'm addicted to it, and I love banana bread. This is the first time I kept it in the fridge, and I was like, why have I never done this? Yeah, keep it in the fridge. It's good. But I have a good recipe that I'll share with you. I will tell you, you have to bake it way longer than it says.
Abigail
That's every banana and pumpkin bread ever invented.
Abby
Low and long.
Abigail
Yeah, Every time. They're like pumpkin bread. 45 minutes. Pull it out wet in the middle. Like, what is this?
Abby
Baking temperature's going bad, and.
Abigail
Yeah, they do.
Abby
It's such a treat.
Abigail
Totally. That's so good. Mine will be a taco soup that I invented on my own.
Abby
How do you make this?
Blake
I'm making taco soup tonight. I want to hear your recipe.
Abigail
Okay, I'll just share it, and then I'll have you guys ride it out too. You ready, Hannah? Okay. Half an onion, diced and sauteed with. With some garlic. Then you're gonna throw in one pound of ground beef. And I'm gonna cheat. I'm gonna do a packet of taco seasoning in there. It just is better. You can do a homemade taco seasoning, and that's.
Abby
Oh. How is that cheating?
Abigail
Well, I just never do it because there's always, like, added kind of icky ingredients in there. Oh, do you want to go check on them?
Abby
Yeah, you keep talking.
Abigail
Okay, so then you add in that packet of seasoning. What else I put in it? Oh, I put in a diced. Canned. Diced tomatoes, two cans of black beans, one can of frozen or one can of corn or frozen corn. Okay. Those are everything going in there. Then you're gonna do some chicken broth. Let it simmer all together. Oh, a three, four cup of rice. Let it simmer together.
Blake
Rice.
Abigail
I love rice in it. I put rice in there, it makes a little thicker. It's really hearty. It's delish. Put a little rice in there. And obviously put in as much broth as you want. Let it cook until the rice is done cooking through. And then you're gonna put in a little bit of cheddar cheese and just a scoop or two of sour cream, and that's it. Eat it with chips and avocado.
Blake
That's what we do. Okay.
Abigail
So good.
Blake
That was pretty there. The rice threw me for a loop,
Abigail
but everything else, Yes. I love the rice edition. Yeah, well, that's. That's always hungry for you guys. If you guys would be so kind as to leave us a review wherever you guys listen to your podcast, that would be so appreciated. This is a review from mbrown579. She says, I binged every episode. Five stars. I found this podcast a couple weeks ago, and I've already listened to every episode. You all are so funny. I have literally laughed out loud at some of the episodes. I feel so much lighter after every listen. Thank you for what you're doing. Thank you so much for that review. It just means so much to us. There are a lot of people here behind the scenes that help and make this podcast come to life. So just hearing that you guys are loving and enjoying the show really means a lot to us. Make sure to like that button. Follow, subscribe. Check out our Patreon. If you guys haven't. It's $5 a month. We get extended bonus episodes. We have our chats. We're putting recipes in there, and always hungry. We're doing our book club over there, like, more extended. And we've got a lot of fun stuff up in the works for you guys for our Patreon community. It is just a blast over there. So thank you guys. If you've already joined. And Abby is out helping a baby, so I guess it's just me doing this. Addie, you want to join me?
Blake
Yep.
Abigail
Okay, ladies, and remember, we're always here.
Hosts: Abby Howard & Abigail Howard
Date: May 15, 2026
Podcast: Always Here (Daylight Media)
In this lively and candid episode, sister-in-law duo Abby and Abigail Howard dive into the world of travel mishaps, share their strongest opinions on commitment and open relationships, and dish out real-world tips for traveling with children. Balancing humor and heartfelt insight, they swap both horror stories and hacks, field listener questions, and reflect on body image after motherhood—all while keeping their trademark tone of warmth, realness, and playful banter.
Genuine, funny, and vulnerable with a “sisters hanging out” vibe. The hosts mix meaningful commentary with everyday real-life stories, quick-witted banter, and always circle back to encouragement and empathy for their listeners.
This episode is a must-listen for parents (or anyone) gearing up for family travel, those curious about the real challenges of self-image after motherhood, or anyone interested in relationship talk with heart and a splash of hot takes. You'll walk away with both actionable advice and a sense of camaraderie from these relatable, hilarious hosts.