Reacting to internet trolls, PDA, & Who’s More Likely w/ Our Husbands

Summary

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Always Here Podcast — Episode Summary

Episode Title: Reacting to Internet Trolls, PDA, & Who’s More Likely w/ Our Husbands
Hosts: Abby Howard & Abby Howard
Guests: Matt & Caleb (their husbands)
Date: May 22, 2026
Podcast Theme: Real, uplifting, and funny relationship moments between sisters-in-law Abby & Abby, sharing the hope and the hard with heart and humor.

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Overview of Episode

This lively episode of Always Here welcomes Abby and Abby’s husbands, Matt and Caleb, for a candid, hilarious, and sometimes heartfelt conversation about relationships, internet trolls, yelling in marriages, who’s more likely to ____, and much more. The group navigates real talk about marriage dynamics, shares personal stories and vulnerabilities, tackles some not-so-positive internet feedback, and ends with advice for newlyweds and light-hearted games. The episode captures the relatable chaos and warmth of two family couples who know how to keep it real, supportive, and deeply funny.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Husband Introductions & Relationship Dynamics

• Abby & Abby have both been married 7 years, just weeks apart. Lots of playful banter about who is the “OG” Abby Howard. (05:41)
• Matt & Caleb’s backgrounds: As different as could be—Caleb did ballet and musical theater, Matt played football. But the couples find lots of commonality ("me and Abby are kind of alike"). (04:07–04:44)
• Minecraft bonding: Caleb and Matt play Minecraft together; initially embarrassing, now endearing. (05:01–05:36)

2. Sharing “Hope & Hard” Moments

• Each couple shares things they're hopeful about this week—Caleb is enjoying new AI programming hobbies, Matt is nostalgic, recovering old photos.
• Light teasing about work and personal quirks ("crack ceiling" jokes re: Caleb’s job in parking lot maintenance), but always with warmth. (08:05–10:59, 13:13)

3. Reacting to Internet Trolls: Yelling in Relationships

• The podcast went viral with a clip about yelling in relationships and red flags for yelling men.
• Host Reaction: Shock at the volume and tone of critical (often hostile and misogynistic) comments from men ("these men are like, it's normal to yell. We should yell"). (11:37–19:37)
• Notable Quotes:
  • “If you have to yell to get your point across, you don't have either a good argument or you're not in control.” – Caleb (13:17)
  • “I don't think you have control of your household if you have to yell to get people to listen.” – Abby (13:31)
  • “The speak when spoken to [comment] just kind of put a shiver down my spot.” – Matt (17:18)
• Discussion: Distinguishing between yelling for safety (e.g., a child running into danger) versus yelling out of anger or as relationship control.
• Relating to their own marriages: The men agree they are not yellers, and that in healthy marriages, yelling is not the norm.

4. Who’s More Likely To…?

A light-hearted segment where couples and husbands answer quick-fire prompts about their quirks and habits:

• Who’s more likely to cry at commercials? (24:15–24:26)
• Who’s more likely to forget where they parked? (24:53–25:11)
• Who’s more likely to be late? – Abigail’s chronic lateness and Abby’s parking lot vigilance are on full display. (25:24–27:39)
• Who apologizes first? Who holds grudges? Who Googles every symptom? Who brings snacks? Who overthinks social interactions? Many more! (29:47–46:01)
• Timestamped highlights:
  • [25:44] “You were 30 minutes late for church.” – Caleb to Abigail.
  • [44:12] “I have to do, like, a predictable analysis to know when she's gonna be hungry and take care of my guys.” – Matt about Abby.

5. Personal Annoyances & Domestic Life

• What’s the most annoying thing your spouse does?
  • “Farting in the morning.” – Abby about Caleb (49:01)
  • “Trumpet butt” and “yakking” in the shower become running jokes. (50:05–50:45)
  • Frequent gentle roasting and self-awareness about their own quirks.
• Confessions about who’s more forgetful, likely to accidentally overshare, or likely to stalk someone on Instagram.

6. Relationship Advice for Newlyweds (72:19)

• Advice from Matt and Caleb:
  • Surround yourselves with good mentors/counselors.
  • Expect conflict but approach it with selflessness and love.
  • Enjoy the “struggle years” and make memories during the tough times.
• Abby: “Look at those times...as your time to figure it out…struggle together. That has given us a fun and cool foundation for hopefully our successful years.” (74:34)

7. Light-hearted Q&A: “We Asked Your Wife”

• Husbands try to guess their wife’s answers to questions like:
  • What's her idea of a perfect date?
  • Most prized material possession?
  • What does she spend the most money on?
  • Where is she happiest?
  • Who's her favorite artist?
  • What is her favorite thing about you?
• Many sweet and funny exchanges:
  • “I said he’s so wise. I love everything you say. Love you.” – Abby to Caleb (69:06)
  • “My chest. My passion for chest.” – Matt, joking (69:29)
  • The wives are proud of their husbands, routines, and sentimentality for small things.

8. Listener Voicemails

• Questions prompt even more humorous, revealing answers:
  • What would you get arrested for as a couple? (usually something unintentional or public indecency from PDA).
  • Why are you only mean to your husband when he’s sick? (78:30)
    • The husbands roast their wives for being “little demons” when they’re sick, while the wives defend themselves for “never getting a sick day” as moms. (79:01–81:10)
  • Cute prank: A wife calls in pretending to be “Cabbie,” an overly complimentary fan.

9. Food, Recipes, and Domestic Routines

• Simple, relatable meal routines (dad dinners = grilling, tater tots, pre-cut fruit and yogurt).
• Discussion of favorite grill tricks and food budgeting woes (Costco conversations and snack fails). (83:32–86:16)
• Suggestions for the wives to do a podcast episode while cooking together (“That would be really cute. Wait, yeah.” – 86:22)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Internet Backlash:
  “I just can’t believe how many people think strongly about that though.” – Matt on men defending yelling (15:38)
• On Conflict:
  “A guy yelling is so intimidating…almost all the kids say ‘I wish he didn’t yell.’” – Abby (12:58)
• On Marriage:
  “You just have to like, push through it. There’s so many stupid fights that can come up in marriage where it’s just like, gotta just let it go.” – Matt referencing Gottman principles (31:30)
• On Public Displays of Affection:
  “We love to get it on, but we’re not the couple going out of the bedroom, bro.” – Matt (71:35)
• On Parenting:
  “I have to do, like, a predictible analysis to know when she's gonna be hungry and take care of my guys.” – Matt (44:12)
• On Small Wins:
  “I was on time…twice this week. That’s amazing!” – Abigail (27:01)
• Signature Podcast Humor:
  “That was a rude wake up call… it’s a Howard thing… trumpet butt.” (49:33–50:10) “Can we just establish that our wives become little demons when we’re sick?” – Matt (78:34)
• On Family:
  “Thank you for being good examples of wonderful men that are, like, strong and kind but gentle.” – Abby (22:40)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

| Segment | Timestamp | |------------------------------------------------------|-------------| | Husbands' backgrounds, introductions | 03:58–05:46 | | Couples Share Hope and Hard moments | 07:49–11:03 | | Internet trolls & yelling in marriage debate | 11:35–19:39 | | Who’s More Likely? (rapid fire Q&A) | 24:08–46:01 | | Spousal annoyances, “trumpet butt” | 49:01–50:09 | | Listener voicemails (newlywed advice, sickness) | 72:19–81:09 | | Relationship advice and Gottman Insights | 31:10–32:19 | | Dad dinners, cooking routine | 83:32–86:16 |

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Episode’s Language & Tone

• The conversation is playful, self-deprecating, sometimes “roasty,” and loaded with inside jokes.
• There’s equal space for sincerity about marriage hardships and fulfillment.
• Even as they share their faults and quirks, the couples focus on teamwork, gentle teasing, and mutual respect.

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Conclusion

This episode captures the energetic, unfiltered chaos and affection of two married couples discussing real relationship moments—from social media backlash to parental teamwork, from “trumpet butt” to teamwork in the kitchen, all peppered with advice and encouragement for other couples. With rapid-fire games, heartfelt admissions, and snappy banter, the warmth and authenticity shine through, making this episode both entertaining and reassuringly real for anyone navigating marriage, parenting, or internet drama.

Transcript

[A]

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[B]

Aprovecha los Ahoros de Memorial Day in

[C]

Los y compra los vasicos parelo gar pormenos ahoro centadolares en la parria gas de cuatro que madores char broil Performance Series.

[D]

I told Abby that you came into the bathroom. Like I just have to figure out how I can bench more than Caleb.

[C]

I did.

[D]

I did always hear is under some heat.

[E]

Oh, frick.

[C]

What happened?

[B]

These men are like. It's normal to yell. We should yell.

[E]

If you have to yell to get your point across, you don't have either a good argument or you're not in control.

[B]

Oh, he's dropping bars.

[E]

I feel like we get in the most fights at airports. Cause you're always hungry.

[B]

I walked through security and my stomach just empties.

[C]

I have to do, like, a predictable analysis to know when she's gonna be

[D]

hungry and take care of my guys.

[E]

It's been four hours.

[B]

No. What's the most annoying thing you do that I think is annoying?

[E]

That I do?

[B]

Farting in the morning.

[C]

Abby called it trumpet butt.

[D]

No, I got that from Abigail.

[B]

It's actually a condition.

[D]

Welcome back to Always Here. We're your hosts, Abby Howard and Abby Howard.

[C]

Oh, yeah, baby.

[D]

Hey, we're in charge over here.

[C]

Oh, sorry, sorry. I'll be quiet. I'll wait to speak unless we're spoken to.

[E]

Are the. Are we doing ground ground rules for this?

[D]

There Are no rules.

[B]

No rules.

[D]

This is casual. This is chatty. But we have a lot prepared for you guys, so don't feel like you have to freestyle.

[B]

Yeah, don't. Don't feel you have to be creative.

[D]

Let's stick to the script, boys.

[C]

Hey, real quick. If you haven't subscribed to Always here, what are you doing? What? They're on the road to 100k, guys. Do you want to be a part of the found. You want to be an Always Here founding member?

[B]

Wait, I like that.

[D]

Founding fathers.

[B]

We should collecting fathers.

[C]

If you want to be a founding father, go ahead and. Go ahead and subscribe.

[D]

Which one was I?

[B]

Thomas Jefferson.

[C]

That's right.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

Randy, throw up the photo of Abby

[D]

when she was the founding father, like, so many times.

[C]

Has everyone seen the picture?

[B]

I love the picture.

[C]

It's hilarious.

[B]

I love the picture.

[C]

My favorite is when someone's, like, literally smoking at the frat party, and you can just see the smoke blowing around. And Abby's there with all of her friends dressed up like a bunch of

[D]

old guys, just so, so sober.

[C]

And all the other ladies are like. And they're wearing nothing. And you're a freaking founding father.

[D]

I looked good. Matt didn't want to hang out with

[B]

me all night, right?

[C]

No, I did. I just. Until you looked like a dude, I just did it with you.

[D]

Exactly. Which I looked at.

[B]

You're like, it's fine. It's not for you. It's for the girl.

[D]

That's what I said. We were married. I think. I think we were married at the.

[C]

Oh, yeah, we were married.

[D]

I don't know. Anyway. Okay, well, so that's Matt, and here's Caleb.

[E]

Hi.

[B]

Hey. They asked on our prepping calls, like, how are Matt and Caleb different? And I was like, literally, probably in every way you could possibly think.

[E]

Do we have a recording of my best man speech? Because I. I think I pretty much said that.

[C]

Yeah, you kind of did. I mean, just to. Just to catch you guys up to speed. Like, Caleb did ballet, tap dance, musical theater. Going up. I played football.

[B]

Exactly.

[C]

I was the zesty one. He was a skateboarder. He thought he was a skater for a while. Wanted to be Tony Hawk.

[E]

I got straight A's.

[C]

Yeah, he tried to be like Justin Bieber and would sing Serenade for girls in middle school. So that's Kayla.

[D]

I'm confused now, but yeah. You guys, this is what we were saying on the call. Like, you guys really aren't that much alike. But I feel like me and Abby are kind of alike.

[B]

Yeah, we are.

[D]

So why.

[C]

How are you guys better friends than we are, is my question.

[B]

Because we have 95% of things in common too.

[C]

I feel like we're getting closer. Caleb and I are playing Minecraft more, so that's good. Maybe we should edit that out. That makes us look weird.

[B]

I think it's sweet.

[E]

Cool guys play Minecraft.

[C]

That's true. That's true.

[B]

Caleb's been a big Minecrafter. I used to be embarrassed about it when we were dating. I was like, that's really cringy, I think. And then I was like, actually, it's kind of Sweet.

[E]

All the YouTubers are doing it.

[B]

Okay, that's Mr.

[E]

Beast. Ryan.

[C]

No, you guys need to make a trend where it's like.

[E]

What.

[C]

What's like, the. The. I've seen these trends where it's like, people, like, worrying about their husband cheating and then it, like, cuts their husband, like, playing, like, building, like, a Lego fort. Just cut and then cut to Caleb and I like, building our Minecraft city with all the.

[D]

With the volume on.

[B]

So loud.

[D]

I, like, walked upstairs. I was like, what is going on?

[B]

It's Caleb. It's Caleb. He always listens things really loud.

[D]

Okay, so on our podcast every week. First of all, we should just say we've both been married for, like, seven years. Seven years, exactly. Yes. We got married, like, two weeks apart.

[B]

Yep.

[D]

But you guys were dating longer. So Abby's the OG Abby Howard, and I'm just the knockoff. The knockoff. The knockoff.

[B]

No, no, no.

[D]

Seriously?

[C]

The Teemu version.

[D]

Yes, yes. The value version.

[C]

Was it. Didn't you say one time that, like, some brand was, like, reaching out about doing a collaboration and then they just, like, ghosted?

[B]

Yeah, they thought it was. They thought it was the other Abbey Howard. I was like, that's fine.

[C]

They.

[B]

That's not.

[C]

They should have just gone ahead and collaborated, you know?

[B]

That's sweet. It's okay. They thought they were getting a little bit more bang for their buck, probably. It's all right. It's all right. No, no, we. Yeah, we started dating before you guys, and then we all got married three weeks apart, which was really fun.

[E]

October of 2013, right?

[B]

Yeah. What year did you guys start dating?

[D]

June of 2016.

[C]

Okay, that's. And it's coming up. Wait, that's your 10 year decade? Yeah, two. We're two months away from our.

[E]

You guys celebrating or what are you guys doing for it?

[C]

We gotta do something big.

[D]

Something big. I'm sure something huge. Maybe we'll Go to the Cheesecake Factory.

[E]

When can you not travel anymore?

[D]

And not for a while. We have a long time, But I don't.

[C]

34 weeks. Isn't that when you're traveling?

[D]

I think it's 36 weeks.

[C]

Okay.

[D]

But yeah. So maybe we'll do something fun. We thought about going on babymoon, in which case that would probably be all in one. Anniversary, dating, anniversary, baby moon. All in one. But something you guys may know from listening to our podcast. Which first of all do you listen to our podcast?

[C]

I do. I've been. I've watched every clip.

[D]

He's watched every clip.

[B]

Watch the clips, Caleb.

[D]

You watched a lot of them for a while there.

[E]

I'm falling off.

[B]

That hurts my feelings.

[E]

Maybe three weeks behind.

[B]

That's actually better than.

[D]

No, that's pretty good.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

Okay.

[D]

We love a supportive husband, but you know that one of our things we do is we share the hope in the hard with heart and humor. So we thought today we would. We didn't warn them.

[B]

You guys are only going to share hards. Go.

[D]

No, you can just share a hope.

[B]

Just the hope is good. Yeah.

[D]

Are you okay with that?

[C]

Yeah. Caleb, you first.

[B]

What's something you feel hopeful about coming up this week? Something that makes you feel happy?

[E]

Yeah. What's the time frame?

[B]

I would say a week because we. We go week to week.

[D]

Yeah. That's good.

[B]

Caleb's in a busy season with work so I feel like that's been a little all encompassing. But surely there are some good things that going on in your life.

[D]

I was crack ceiling going. Caleb.

[C]

Seen any big cracks recently?

[E]

You guys are hilarious.

[B]

For context, Caleb works in parking lots.

[E]

Okay.

[C]

Add more context. That's all the context. He's a meter maid. Kind of like Zootopia, you know.

[E]

Okay. My actual full time job is is I'm a part owner of a pavement maintenance business. So we work in asphalt and parking lots. Filling cracks and asphalt seal coating parking lots asphalt.

[C]

Like what? Like.

[E]

Cuz it's not just. We don't really do concrete parking lots. We don't do concrete.

[B]

Oh, Kale got serious. You're right, babe. That's good.

[E]

So it's been really busy. It's been a. We are doing well.

[B]

I think you're hoping that you guys. I've been doing really good.

[C]

How big was the biggest crack you've seen in asphalt before?

[E]

At least this big.

[B]

You're getting creative now. What's your hope?

[E]

We need to cut that.

[C]

I. My hope right now. This is so nerdy. But I'm really excited because I think I'm finally going to try to recover all of the old like photos and videos that I'd saved on my old computer from like I think the early years of us dating. And then like.

[D]

Is that why you've been sitting me

[F]

a bunch of old.

[C]

Yeah, I've been, I've been nostalgic and I've been going back and looking at like all of our old photos and videos of us together and. And like I backed up my old iPhone back in like 2016 to the computer that like, it no longer works. So I need to like, probably use Claude to figure out how to get this computer to work. Pull all. Or at least just get the information off the hard drive. That way I can like, you know, see all those like old videos and photos again.

[D]

Yeah, that's sweet. That's sweet.

[E]

Okay.

[B]

That unlocked a hope for you.

[E]

It's. It's not a hope. It's just something I've been enjoying recently. I've been using Claude to build an Claude. Yeah, it's really just for men. Just AI. It's just for men.

[D]

I mean, with a name like Claude,

[B]

it's not tickling the ladies.

[C]

Comment down below if you're an always here girly that also uses Claude.

[B]

Listen, I do use AI. I just not using it. I don't use it all day long.

[C]

Everything's.

[E]

We just watch AI videos all day.

[B]

I do see your YouTube recommended. It is a lot of AI videos.

[D]

No, it's not.

[B]

It is.

[D]

I can't even spot it. I don't even. I could be consuming it. I don't even know.

[E]

So I've been building like a workout tracking fitness app just kind of for fun. It's cool, it's. It's got a ways to go, but it's like 10 years ago it had taken like $10,000 to build this and now you can build stuff in two days.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's cool.

[D]

It's just a little fun new hobby.

[E]

Yeah, yeah. Passion projection project.

[B]

Those are great hopes.

[E]

You want the hard.

[D]

Sure. You got one?

[B]

Yeah, Bring it on work.

[D]

Okay.

[B]

Okay.

[D]

Cracks. That is my wife.

[E]

My wife.

[B]

No, no.

[D]

Is that what you said?

[C]

My wife has been getting on my nerves recently.

[E]

Oh, cheers to that.

[D]

Wow, that's clean.

[B]

Wow, that's crazy.

[D]

That's crazy. Actually, that kind of leads us to the next segment.

[C]

Oh, what's going on?

[B]

Wow, that's crazy.

[D]

Wow, that's crazy. Cause this week this our. Wow, that's crazy. Hit a little close to home because you Guys may not know this, but always here is under some heat.

[C]

Oh, frick. Wow.

[B]

We're viral.

[D]

Is it viral?

[B]

No. I don't know. What is it, Addy? Is it viral?

[D]

What determines viral?

[B]

I don't know. Every time people say something like, oh, viral recipe, and then I go look at the original recipe, I'm like, it has 10,000 views.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I think people just say viral as a buzzword.

[D]

Well, then viral. This went viral. Okay, so you know that clip that Abby showed you beforehand? Okay, good.

[E]

Okay, 400.

[D]

That video, you could say it reached the wrong.

[B]

It did reach the wrong demographic.

[C]

It reached the incels.

[D]

No, it. No, it reached the men, which really is never.

[B]

Not really. Our target audience.

[D]

Our target audience. And it reached. Honestly, in my opinion, it reached the Red Flag Men. If you.

[B]

It really did. These men are like, it's normal to yell. We should yell. So we. We have some comments here.

[C]

Oh, really?

[D]

No. Oh, no. We got a lot of. All the men were mad at us. So wait, we're gonna. Maybe we can impose the clip here. If a guy raises their voice, that is a really big red flag. A guy yelling is so intimidating. I actually saw this video, and it was about fatherhood. They surveyed a bunch of children. What is one thing you want your

[B]

dad to stop doing?

[D]

It's gonna make me cry. Like, almost all the kids say, I wish he didn't yell. And if you're anything like me, you might be shocked to find out that this really attracted a rise out of some men. And I think we had to delete some comments. But here's the comments that we're gonna call out.

[B]

We're gonna call him out by name.

[E]

Can I just share my thought on that?

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

If you have to yell to get your point across, you don't have either a good argument or you're not in control.

[B]

Oh, he's dropping bars.

[C]

Oh.

[E]

Like, if you can make a good argument without having to yell, then you don't.

[B]

You actually are winning.

[D]

That's precisely my point. Honestly, I don't think you have control of your household if you have to yell to get people to listen.

[B]

Yeah, totally. So we were shocked by these comments.

[D]

We were shocked. And honestly, some of them are actually scary. I'm like, these guys, I hope are single. Like, I literally hope, because.

[E]

Can we put their at up there?

[B]

Yeah, sure.

[D]

We're a little honest over here. Hey. They felt that it was okay to publicly comment this.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

From their own accounts.

[B]

Yeah. So on our ip. So we're gonna blast it.

[D]

And I also Think I would hate if an always homegirl found themselves with one of these guys.

[B]

That would be. Yes, this. It was a red flag dating episode. So these people are red flags. Scott said women should stop complaining so much. It's always women saying how men should act. Maybe focus on yourself

[D]

also, Scott did edit that comment, so I wonder what he had before. Scott, my man, this is what Prince Chef said. Have you ever tried listening?

[C]

Wait, okay, hold on.

[E]

I think there is difference between yelling if like your spouse is upstairs and

[C]

you're like what you say, like there's that yelling.

[D]

We're warming up 1000%.

[B]

There's a difference. Okay. Crippy Gremlin 30 said they complain if we raise your voice and they complain if we don't. And then call us soft. And then people wonder why you can't make them happy.

[C]

You know, some of these, I will say some of these guys just seem like they might have just had a really bad day and they're taking it out on the wrong. Someone needs to delete their app off their phone.

[D]

This one says they need to delete the apps. Okay. This one's from Alex Smith, 1986.

[C]

I can't believe these are all real dudes. Like, they have profile pics.

[D]

He has his truck as his profile pic or car. It says if you don't have an authoritative figure in the house, you will not know right from wrong because you would not. You would have punishments or someone yelling at you for don't.

[B]

Wrong.

[C]

I just can't believe how many people

[D]

think strongly about that though.

[C]

I'm shocked at how many people just think it's okay to just yell. Like just that that's just not an okay thing to do. I mean, okay, there have been times I've, I've yelled at our kids. Like if they're running towards the street and I want them to get hit by the car, yes, I'm going to yell because I need them to freeze and not get hit by a car.

[B]

There were some arguments.

[D]

Yes.

[B]

And that's not what I was. That wasn't that point.

[D]

I think they should have known that that's what this person said.

[C]

But that's like one of the few instances where I think it's okay.

[D]

This one says, well, if I ever see my children doing anything life threatening or bullying their siblings, I'm going to yell at them not to do that.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[D]

If your kid's going to go in front of a car.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yell.

[D]

That's not the context of this.

[C]

Sweetie, sweetie, that's the highway.

[B]

Okay. I think this one's crazy. I got the vid. You have no idea what makes a man a man. If a man raises his voice. Listen to him.

[D]

Look at his profile picture, too.

[B]

That's a crazy comment.

[E]

Yeah, I mean, you have no idea

[B]

what makes a man a man. If a man raises his voice. Listen to him.

[D]

And Biden kissing on my lips.

[E]

Can you pull that up?

[D]

That's not AI. It's not AI.

[B]

That's not AI.

[D]

Another red flag for this fellow. Just add another. Now, this one's the one that really got me. Maybe stop causing issues so much so we don't have. Or so we have to raise our voices.

[B]

Or the one above that. Keep your mouth shut and speak when spoken to. Then you wouldn't have to ever experience that.

[E]

I feel like all these are, like subtweets at their wives, bro.

[B]

It's really crazy.

[C]

The speak when spoken to is like a little.

[B]

That's a little.

[C]

That just kind of put a shiver down my spot.

[B]

A little shiver. I agree, man.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

Yeah. This one's definitely the guy's fault. Let's not look at what caused him to yell. That would lead to accountability.

[B]

I mean, there'd be so many.

[D]

These fellows really need zero context to have such an opinion on this.

[B]

Yeah. So we want your opinion about yelling.

[C]

We want more opinion.

[B]

You dropped your bar.

[E]

I shared my bar.

[B]

That was good.

[D]

That was good.

[C]

I know.

[E]

Like, I don't like it, and I. There's obviously context and to yelling. Like, again, kid running in the street.

[D]

Exactly.

[E]

Spouse can't hear you because they're upstairs.

[B]

Even humor. Like, sometimes it's just funny if you're

[E]

like, I don't know, you get loud jokingly. And he laughs.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[E]

Because he.

[B]

Context.

[E]

Because I don't yell at him.

[B]

Right.

[E]

So he. When I yell, he laughs.

[D]

Literally the angry, scary yelling.

[C]

I think the most common time I'll yell is when I yell ooga da baga. When I'm playing with our kids and I'm the monster.

[E]

You should have kept that to yourself.

[B]

No, it's not. Yeah.

[C]

I think there's quite a few videos of me yelling, ooga da baga.

[B]

That's fun. Yeah. Yeah, I agree. And I was thinking about this because we kind of talked about this clip on our call. And I think about all the men in my life. I think about you, Matt, you, Caleb, your dad, my dad, my sister's husband. Like, not a single male that I know that's in a healthy marriage is screaming at their wife in A fight or an argument or like out of impatience. And so I think I was a little shocked at the amount of comments here where this just feels acceptable. And there were some women being like it's normal. And I was like, that's actually just not healthy.

[D]

Sad.

[B]

Yeah, it's really crazy. So I don't know, we just wanted to bring that up and get your guys opinions on it because yeah, there

[D]

was also a sub argument that was like, let's like it's like why do we normalize not letting men have emotions? It's like, no, that's not okay.

[E]

Put me on blast. Have I ever yelled?

[B]

I've never heard you raise your voice.

[E]

I've raised my voice, but not like

[B]

I don't think there's ever been tone. You get serious and I think there's like an authoritative tone that I also get if we're in like a heated argument. But it's not yelling. I think there's a difference. Like you could be serious and have serious arguments and conversations and have like a stern voice, but it's not yelling out of like intimidation or out of control of anger.

[D]

Yeah. And I also think I'm thinking also in the context of like parenting and kids, like you've already lost control if you get to that point. Like that's already like your kids have already just. They're gone. You know what I mean? So that's also what I was thinking about when I was thinking about that. Because I'm like when you're choosing someone to date to then marry then to likely have kids with, this is the. That was my thought process on that take and apparently was just not popular. Some other black didn't agree. He said, dad, stop yelling, kids stop behaving.

[F]

Huh?

[E]

What?

[C]

He said, dad, stop yelling, kids stop behaving.

[D]

Yeah, he said that.

[B]

That's what I actually would tune out the yelling in my house.

[D]

Yeah, same not from my dad, my mom.

[C]

Sorry. Whenever I got yelled at it was like oh, okay. Like now I definitely don't want to listen to what you're saying.

[B]

Yeah, you kind of lose respect a little bit.

[C]

Oh yeah. Oh yeah.

[D]

Well, cuz you're already like. Yeah, it kind of puts that you at the equal level as your kid. You know what I mean? Like it kind of just lessens your respect like you're saying. But then the other argument that was in the comments is like, well, if men have to stop yelling then women have to stop crying.

[E]

That can be manipulative.

[D]

So yeah, I just really, I think we should shout you guys out. I'm thankful that you guys are not yellers and ladies.

[B]

It's possible.

[D]

It is possible.

[C]

We're basically perfect husbands, is what she's saying.

[D]

Seriously.

[B]

Thank you to Merit for sponsoring this portion of today's episode. Let's be honest, if a routine takes longer than five minutes, yeah, it's not happening. That's why Merit Beauty believes great makeup should be effortless. Their clean, thoughtfully curated essentials help you get a fresh, polished look in minutes with products you can swipe on, blend with your fingers, and just move on with your day. Merit's bestsellers are pretty proof that less really is more. Their flesh balm gives you that natural, healthy glow without overdoing it. I'm currently wearing it right now in the color archival. I love their, like, deep berry hues. They just blend so beautifully. They're buildable, and they just look so natural. I love them. I also want to shout out their minimalist, which works double duty as both the foundation and concealer so you can get quick coverage without layering on a bunch of products. My older sister works in the hospital, and she was just telling me the other day about this nurse I had on the minimalist, and they were talking about how amazing her skin looked, which is perfect for that. Where you want to look nice put together, but also it doesn't feel heavy. And if you're having maybe a no makeup day, that's no problem. Merit's great skin Serum is all you need. It instantly hydrates and plumps for a fresh, dewy look. I use the serum every single day, actually. I put on under my makeup, and I wear it on no makeup days. For me, someone that has really dry skin, it makes me feel glowy and a little refreshed. It is time for your makeup and skin care to meet the reality of your daily routine with Merit Beauty. Right now, Merit Beauty is offering our listeners their signature makeup bag with your first [e-mail] that's M E R I T beauty.com to get your free signature makeup bag with your first order. Meritbeauty.com well, that's good. Thanks for chiming in and thank you for being good examples of wonderful men that are, like, strong and kind but gentle and.

[E]

Well, one strong.

[C]

Well, I'm working on it. I. I benched, I benched, I benched 185 left.

[B]

I liked it.

[C]

Hey, three sets of 185, six reps. And ChatGPT said that means that I. My one rep max is probably 225.

[D]

I have a confession, Matt. I told Abby that you came into the bathroom the other night. Like, I have to figure. I just have to figure out how I can bench more than Caleb.

[C]

I did. I did. It's just a little brotherly competition, you know?

[E]

You know, you'll never be able to.

[D]

He's just gonna keep working harder.

[C]

You want to shake on that right now?

[D]

Okay.

[B]

You should shake on it.

[E]

Sure.

[C]

That'd be fun. All right. Competition on, homie.

[D]

Just let him get his iced coffee

[B]

out of the way. That's great.

[D]

These are the men that let us set our standards so high.

[B]

Yes.

[D]

So they do exist. The people that were like, these girls are crazy. They're never gonna find that.

[B]

And we found them young, too, before we even really knew.

[C]

So basically, if you want, we had

[D]

no idea we were getting into the

[C]

best get married young. Okay.

[D]

Anyway.

[B]

Okay, so that's a good segue. Who's more likely to bench more? We're gonna play a game. Who more likely to. And we have a whole good long list of this.

[D]

So for the sake of this game. Abigail. Abby. And then you guys are just gonna say your guess of who's more likely at the same time, we'll count you

[B]

down, talk about them.

[D]

Okay, so the first one.

[E]

Have you guys gone through this and agree on all of these?

[B]

No, I have no idea what these say. I haven't read the name.

[E]

Oh, okay.

[D]

Ready?

[E]

Yep.

[D]

Who's more likely to cry during a commercial?

[E]

Any commercial.

[B]

During a commercial.

[D]

Think about the choice.

[C]

This is for our wives. Okay. You need to say 3, 2, 1.

[D]

3, 2, 1, Abby. Yeah. Okay, so that one is pretty set in stone. I agree.

[B]

Who's more likely to cancel plans last minute?

[C]

Three, two, one.

[E]

Abigail.

[D]

I was like, you're never gonna cancel a plan. I did the other week, and it's still haunted. Hunting me.

[C]

Oh, yeah, you did the next night, but then you still went to the show.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

You canceled, but then you still showed up the next day.

[D]

It's not necessarily always healthy. Who's more likely to forget where they parked?

[C]

Three, two, one. Abby.

[D]

Yeah. I don't know.

[B]

Yeah, I feel like I'm really, like, a freak in the parking lots. I don't know. I'm very, like.

[F]

I know.

[B]

Okay.

[D]

You remember?

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

Okay.

[B]

I get, like, nervous. I'm, like, very watchy. Okay. Who's more likely to say they're on their way but still be in pajamas?

[C]

Three, two, one, Abigail. Oh,

[B]

okay. Let's. Let's hear the courts. Why?

[C]

Well, you know, I will say when we first Started dating, which was almost a decade ago. Abby was pretty good at being on time, but then she met this ADHD man, which happens to be me. And you just.

[D]

You're.

[C]

You're late for everything now.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah, that's true.

[E]

You were 30 minutes late for church.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

And you're like, I'm getting in the car. I said, don't come.

[B]

That did happen last week.

[E]

And the reason I was there early is because I was serving at church.

[B]

Yes. He was there early. And I just. I didn't even make it on. I didn't even make it.

[E]

I have to get to church 45 minutes early. So that's why we drive separately. And so I've been at church for an hour and 15 minutes.

[B]

Yes.

[E]

And you're like, I'm getting in the car.

[B]

And I said, pretty minutes after.

[D]

Were you actually getting in the car?

[E]

Don't come.

[B]

Yeah, I was.

[C]

Did you come?

[B]

No, I didn't. No, I didn't. I was like, yeah, he's right. This is ridiculous. What am I going to do?

[E]

I know you posted on your story, like, is 20. What's your breaking point?

[B]

Yes.

[E]

Of like, when you're like, oh, it's too late to still come to something.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

And people are like, 10 minutes. And you're like, mine's like 30 minutes, 20.

[D]

My mom said. She said they need to adjust Abigail's burn score for your comedy classes you've been taking.

[C]

Oh, because she comes so late.

[D]

Yeah, she does.

[E]

They take off 15 of.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[D]

You have to go to two classes for it to equal one.

[B]

I always make it for the workout. I just always miss the warm up and the showing.

[D]

It's only a 45 minute workout.

[B]

Exactly. It is crazy.

[D]

It is crazy.

[E]

And there's been no adjustment.

[B]

No. I'm getting better. I've been on time twice this week. That's amazing. Well, I count today's on time. What did you guys count today?

[D]

You were late today.

[B]

No, I wasn't.

[D]

Abigail, you were the last person to go into the class.

[E]

Abby gets stressed out if she's there on time.

[B]

Yeah. If I'm like, early and like, what do I do?

[D]

We did the whole warm up.

[E]

No, no, it's not even early.

[D]

It's like, I'd already done a ton of push ups.

[C]

I do know how you feel. If I get somewhere five minutes early, I'm like, what, what am I.

[B]

What am I doing?

[C]

I don't know what to do with my hands.

[B]

Literally.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

I'm like, well, I got time to kill.

[D]

Yeah. Matt, honestly, you should. That one. I. That's out of you. She's more late than me.

[B]

It's true. Especially right now.

[D]

Yes, she has more of a reason. She's got a baby. Who's more likely to laugh at the wrong moment.

[C]

3, 2, 1.

[B]

Abigail, I honestly don't know.

[D]

Yeah, maybe you just laugh more in general than me.

[B]

Yeah, I think I do laugh sometimes when I'm uncomfortable. So, yeah, you're probably right.

[D]

You're more giggly.

[B]

You're right. Who is more likely to bring snacks? 3, 2, 1. Oh, it's not me.

[C]

I feel like Abby. Well, you don't bring snacks. You're more of like a. I baked a cake and cookies.

[D]

What are we talking about? Like, for a play date?

[B]

Yeah, I was gonna say there was a time where I didn't. I was like, oh, CJ's not really a snack kid, and he would eat everyone else's snacks. And then I was like, I actually probably need to start bringing him snacks.

[E]

I thought we were talking about for self, not kids.

[B]

Oh, okay. For kids. Abby's. I think. I think Abby's better for both of snacks.

[D]

I. I don't want to be without food.

[B]

Yeah, I think you're better with snacks.

[D]

I don't know about that. I feel like we're both good. Who's more likely to read all the messages in the group chat but never respond?

[B]

3, 2, 1. Abigail, I think you respond to your texts.

[C]

I don't even know. I don't even think you read them.

[E]

I think that's my thing. It's like, you don't even read them.

[B]

Yeah, I don't read text usually.

[D]

Now we're just frying Abby's life. This isn't fair.

[C]

I do feel you. How many messages. Messages have you had, like, build up before? Like, what's the matter?

[B]

I think I was at 50 yesterday.

[C]

Oh, okay. I've been worse. I've ever. I've had, like, 100 before.

[B]

I'm at 29 right now.

[C]

Okay.

[D]

Sometimes I'm bad about.

[C]

You know what's getting annoying, too, is now, like, I get so bothered when I get a text from, like, somebody trying to sell me something. It's like, how the frick did you get my number? Because it's. It's like what happened with email with all the soliciting over. Email is now coming into messages, and it's really bothering, like, your roof and your trees. Just anything. Literally anything at all. Like, people somehow. Yeah, I don't.

[D]

Yeah, I don't get any of Those.

[C]

I don't want to say too much because I don't want it to keep happening, but like, it's so.

[E]

3, 1, 4.

[C]

We are from St. Louis. Yeah, I hate that.

[D]

I don't know what you guys are going to say to this one.

[C]

What?

[D]

Actually, yes, I do. Who is more likely to apologize first, even if they're not wrong?

[B]

Three, two, one.

[E]

Abigail.

[D]

I'm just a jerk.

[C]

I love you.

[D]

Don't. Don't kiss now. It's weird because we talked about PDA Too much.

[C]

I love you so much.

[B]

Not too much. Who's more likely to hold a grudge? Three, two, one.

[C]

Abby.

[E]

Abby,

[D]

Just the grouch. No, I agree with you, you guys. I agree.

[E]

I waited for Matt to say his answer.

[C]

I will say I. It does. Maybe I just have short term memory loss. I'm just like, dory. But sometimes, like, I don't want to say anything stupid, but if it's like, like, what did I do? Like, oh, we had. We disagreed last night. Frick. What did I say? And then like, I'm trying to remember what it was.

[D]

Oh, I don't think that's a grudge. I'm like, still sad about it.

[C]

I'm like. I'm like. Your memory is so sharp. I'm like, I can't remember what happened. I'm just like, happy that the day

[D]

I have the note, you know, in my brain. Yeah, the quotes.

[B]

We kind of talked about this on our last episode, our Red Flags episode that I do the silent treatment. And Abby's like, likes to explosive. No, we said, you are an external processor where I like, kind of.

[D]

That's really nice.

[B]

I go internal and I'm like, I can't talk at all until we're just talking about what we need to talk about.

[D]

And Matt so wishes I was like that.

[C]

Something that really stuck out to me. And this was enlightening for me, listening to the Gotman. Like the. The. I forget their names, but the Gottman Institute. The couple that like, head. Heads the Gottman Institute. Seven Principles of the Seven Principles of a Healthy Marriage. What's the book title?

[D]

Make Marriage Work.

[C]

No, it's. Yeah, the seven Principles of Making Marriage Work, I think.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah, I think that's the name of the book. And they talk about how it's like 80 or 90%. I forget it might be 89.

[D]

I forget that's what he always tells me.

[C]

But. No, but, like, unsolvable. Post conflict is unsolvable. So you just have to like, push through it. And. Yes, you do. Need to resolve conflict. Like, you can't just say, oh, well, it's. Most of it's unsolvable, so we should never, like, resolve conflict. But also, there's so many stupid fights that can come up in marriage where it's just like, gotta just let it go. Sure.

[E]

You know, what was our last fight?

[B]

You guys know, but we're not saying it out loud.

[C]

Was it today or yesterday?

[B]

No, it was.

[D]

Was it today or yesterday?

[B]

That's about the right word. Ago. I feel like. Yeah, a lot of conflict is more so resolving feelings maybe more so than the actual what the issue was. Is that what you mean?

[D]

That's a good point.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

It's like, I'm gonna use that next time. Yeah.

[B]

It's like we're resolving how that affected my thoughts in my field. Yeah. Thank you to SeatGeek for sponsoring this portion of today's episode. It is the springtime. It is warming up. That means I want to get out of the house, I want to get outside, I want to go do fun things, go to fun events, and there's no better place to find what's going on in your city than on SeatGeek. With over 35 million downloads, SeatGeek is the number one rated ticketing app. There are so many artists going on tour right now. Bruno Mars, bts, Morgan Wallen. So many more come to mind. Plus, the US Is hosting the World cup this year. So you want to grab your tickets now? We have been loving going to baseball games recently. We're a big sports family here. So seatgeek makes it super easy to go on and just see what are the best ticket prices? Where can we get seats together? What days are the best days to go to the games. Everything on their website is seamless and simple and easy to use. Concert season also has officially started to make it even better. You can use code always here for 10% off your SeatGeek tickets. That's 10% off tickets with promo code always here. Make sure you click the link in the description to download the app and have the code automatically added to your account so that you guys can use it later. Thank you again to save seat geek. Okay, who's more likely to need a loading time? 3, 2, 1.

[E]

Hold on.

[C]

I just need to think. Who needs a load time?

[D]

I don't know what they're gonna say to this.

[E]

Okay, I'll go.

[C]

Three, two, one. Abby.

[D]

Okay.

[B]

Really?

[D]

I spent a lot less time alone.

[B]

Yeah, Abby is actually very extroverted.

[E]

Yeah, but you'd never want to be

[B]

alone what are you talking about? I'm don't never leave the house.

[D]

What are you talking about?

[B]

Oh, yeah, but you don't count.

[E]

See, that's where. Yeah, I thought I did count.

[B]

No, no. Because you're just my safe person, so I never feel drained around you.

[D]

Yeah, I don't think husbands count for this.

[B]

I don't think husbands count. I don't think kids count. I think more just like. Well, maybe they come.

[D]

Who's more likely to Google every symptom?

[C]

Wait, I'm going back. That's like your dad. Like, your dad does that, and then I'm like, trying to think. Do you do that? No. I feel like you tell me to look it up. You're like, matt, you look it up right now.

[B]

No, I find it.

[E]

You were like, lewis ate all of CJ's kinetic sand. I'm like, what? All right. And I look it up.

[B]

I was like, it'll probably be fine.

[C]

Well, yeah, that's kind of cute that our wives go to us, like, when there's, like, some sort of moment. It's like, I need you to fix it.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

This feels like a man's problem.

[B]

You worry about this. We met.

[D]

It's like, I can handle the things. I know at it, but it's like, if it. It's out of the Orient, like, the tasks. I know.

[B]

I'm like, yeah, you got this one.

[D]

I'm not gonna go do my own research.

[B]

Yeah. No. Who's more likely to let the kids eat snacks for dinner? Three, two, one.

[C]

Abby.

[E]

Me. Abby. I don't know.

[D]

Between the two of you.

[B]

Between the two of us?

[D]

Yes.

[B]

Caleb, I. I always say this. I mean this really kindly, like, you are a very capable dad, and I have no. I never, like, leave the house. And I'm like, caleb can't do it. Or, like, you know, I mean, I'm like, he knows how to take care of them. He knows their schedule and stuff. The one thing I do, I'm like, I don't know if the kids ate. Like, I just don't. I think you assume that they eat before they go to bed, and then when they wake up, you're like, they probably already ate. Like, you just always skip meal time. No. No. You don't think so?

[E]

I think I just, for cj, kind of expect CJ to be like, hey, dad, I'm hungry.

[B]

Yeah, I don't. Like, he does and he never does. He could care less about eating. So it's like, oh, he probably didn't eat.

[C]

He probably didn't I'll catch. I'll catch our boys in the pantry with, like, double double fisting chocolate chips, just, like, shoving it in there.

[D]

We had to move them up high and then that.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

You know what it was today?

[C]

What did they get into?

[D]

I couldn't find Augie.

[C]

What was it?

[D]

I was yelling, but I could hear him.

[C]

Okay.

[D]

And I was like, what the heck? I was like, oh, he's in the freaking pantry. Open the door. He has that massive, like, factory sized bag of Lucky Charms marshmallows.

[B]

Oh, no.

[D]

All over the floor and all. I was like, okay, yeah, we're gonna

[B]

switch it up now in the game, and we're gonna have it to where? Between couple. Couple to couple. We're just gonna say between me and Caleb, who we think will be more likely to do these things, and you guys answer, who's more likely between you two? Okay, so you guys are answering for yourselves.

[C]

All right, let's do it.

[B]

Okay. Who's more likely to give into screen time for the kids? Caleb.

[E]

Yep.

[C]

I'm more likely. Yeah, we, like, for a while, Auggie would wake up and be like, dad, we watch Darth Vader like, every.

[D]

Every.

[C]

Which is. Honestly, I will say that is really fun because when we went to Disneyland, he got to meet Darth Vader. He's obsessed with, like, all things Star wars. And it's, like, a little. It's just fun for us. You know, we have. We had a lightsaber battle on our playset the other day, and it was dark out, so, like, the. It was just, like, glowing in the dark. You know, that's how the lightsabers work. And it was really. I actually had a lot of fun. I kind of felt like I was

[D]

behind on that, though, because this morning, Augie asked to watch Darth Vader. I was like, no, we're not watching Darth Vader. And then Griffin goes, that's only with dad. Because he said he told. And I think it was because he said, because Griffin. Griffin's scared of Darth Vader. But then I was like. But at first I was like, is he picking up on the fact that we have different expectations? Not good.

[C]

Does Griffin feel safe to watch Darth Vader with me? Because I'm like, you know, keep him safe.

[D]

No, because he said. Because he said, because I don't like Darth Vader.

[B]

Oh, he's, like, scared of Darth Vader.

[C]

I think it spooks him out. Yeah.

[B]

This one.

[D]

Who's more likely to panic over a minor kid injury? Between you Guys.

[B]

I mean, definitely me, but I don't think either of us really panic over minor kid injuries.

[E]

What do you call minor?

[B]

I think I'd panic more of a major. I would panic more.

[E]

I feel like I never panic.

[B]

Yeah. I've never seen you panic.

[D]

Between us, Matt, who's more likely to panic over?

[C]

Definitely. Yeah, definitely.

[E]

You.

[C]

Wait, me? You think it's me?

[B]

I would think it's Matt, to be honest. Yeah, I'm gonna be honest.

[C]

Oh. Because I feel like. I feel like when Augie had to go to the er, I feel like I went into, like, fix it, Felix mode.

[E]

So you used to, like, your kid trip and fell. You, like, pick him up fast and run outside and.

[C]

It's okay.

[D]

It's okay. It's a wonder they're tough. That's funny. I love that they perceived it differently, because I knew you were going to say me, but I don't know. I don't feel like I panic, but I did get freaked out about Augie's.

[B]

But I feel like that was a major. That was a major, not a minor case. Yeah.

[D]

You're more likely to panic over the minor ones. I'm more likely to panic over the major ones. There we go. Yeah, that's fair. Yeah.

[C]

I feel like. I feel like that was, like, noob. That was, like, newborn stage, though, where I was just, like, afraid of everything, you know? Like, I remember, like, being, like, if I don't have that special sock on them, like, what if they stop breathing? Like, you just, like, think of all these, like, doomsday scenarios as a new parent.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

You know, I feel like that was, like, a phase.

[B]

Yeah. I don't feel like I've seen it as much recently. I also don't see your kids get hurt that often, to be honest. Yeah.

[C]

Augie's freaking tough, man.

[B]

Yeah. I feel like he doesn't really get hurt.

[D]

Who's more likely to handle chaos? Like, it's nothing.

[B]

Okay. Caleb, for sure.

[D]

Matt, between us, who do you think handles chaos? Like, it's nothing. Like, it's nothing. It's kind of weird.

[C]

I feel like we. It's dependent on, like, the stage of our marriage. I feel like.

[D]

What does that mean?

[B]

Who's over stimulated at the time? Yeah, I feel like.

[C]

Yeah, like, depends. Like, who. Like, who's caring a lot, you know, I'm gonna.

[D]

I'm gonna actually give myself this one.

[C]

You feel like. Oh, you feel like. Okay, okay.

[D]

Because when we were at the airport recently, I was like, yeah, I think. I think I just don't think you perceive it as chaos. So you're just kind of like, nothing to be alarmed about here. And I like, no, something is wrong.

[B]

Oh, that's good. Who is more likely to give the silent treatment? Yeah, me for sure.

[D]

Abigail. Matt.

[C]

Yeah. I feel like if it's get. If things are getting a little too cuckoo crazy, I just have to just

[B]

like, maybe it's a middle child thing.

[D]

Just go silent.

[C]

No, it's actually not. I think Abby and I, we were both like the. What do you call it in hockey? The. The like enforcer. You know, the enforcer who's, like, beats up the other team in hockey. I think Abby and I were that for. For like, our families. So I think there. If there was a parent that was like, you know, maybe raising their voice, I think we are the ones that would talk back. And. And we're married to each other, so. So I think so. I think, like. So it's like we can either have

[D]

like an actual nuclear match.

[C]

So I think with us, I'm like, either we can have a nuclear bomb go off right now, or I can just, like, shut up and walk away. So then I just shut up and walk away.

[B]

Totally interesting. I think we're both peacemakers. You're probably the peacemaker in your family when you say. Would you say Caleb was a peacemaker, Matt?

[E]

No, I would. I would, like, just try to make humor out of it.

[C]

You would? Yeah. And I could never do that.

[E]

Smooth things over.

[C]

Kale would crack.

[D]

Josh is definitely the peacemaker.

[B]

Josh is the peacemaker. You're right.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

Like, I would. I feel like I'd, like, mimic my mom when she would get angry.

[C]

That's the. That's the hard part for me is, like, I've never been funny and so trying to crack jokes did not work.

[E]

You're not funny.

[C]

Yeah, it would just piss her off more. Yeah.

[D]

This one says, who's more likely to stalk someone on Instagram?

[E]

Didn't you get a LinkedIn to stalk people's LinkedIn?

[B]

Yeah, but then.

[D]

But then.

[B]

Then I heard that you could see people could see whose profile you looked at, and I was like, well, I'm not going to use it.

[E]

Yeah, I'm premium.

[B]

Well, I don't know who's got premium, who doesn't. They don't need to be. No, I just want you people doing for work.

[D]

It is just closed.

[E]

It's like a goldish box thing.

[B]

Oh, listen, I have never had LinkedIn for long enough to learn how it works, but yeah, I did consider that. I Was like, I'm curious what they're doing for work these days.

[C]

So do you ever saw people on Instagram?

[D]

Not really.

[B]

I don't know. No.

[D]

No, I don't.

[C]

I feel like. So maybe it's me then. Because I feel like sometimes if I. That's where I have to be careful with social media, because sometimes I see. You can always see everybody's highlight reel, and you get jealous and you're like, wow, what is their life? Looks so much better than mine. What are they up to? They look so. Everything looks amazing.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

You know, so that's interesting.

[B]

I feel like being in this industry, I'm like. I know in my head I'm like, that's good for them. But I think in my head, I'm like, I know. It's always not like I don't feel like I struggle with the jealousy or comparison online, because I think just knowing this, I'm like, I know what I post versus sometimes what's going on behind the scenes, you know?

[E]

You know how, like, fake you are.

[B]

No, I'm not fake. But it just is, like, the best moment, you know? And I share the hard things, but I never share them in the moment.

[C]

That's why we like the hope in the hard.

[B]

That's right.

[E]

With heart and humor.

[D]

Thank you, guys.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

This one feels pointed. Who is more likely to get hangry and start a fight?

[C]

Abby.

[B]

Do you remember that making me want

[D]

to pick a fight?

[B]

Do you remember what?

[D]

This is kind of giving me the itch to just, you know, cause a riot.

[C]

You're the cutest little pregnant lady there ever was.

[B]

Do you remember when we were in Hawaii and Matt would, like, just pull over anytime? Abby said she would get hungry?

[E]

Just avoiding fights.

[B]

No, we kind of talked about that on the last episode. I was like, maybe that's why.

[D]

See, I didn't even perceive it that way. That's how spoiled I am.

[B]

No, I don't think it's full. I mean, I think it was out of care to, like, take care of his wife.

[D]

It was like, why was I so hungry?

[E]

I feel like we on most flights at airports because you're always hungry.

[B]

There's something about those. I walk through security and my stomach just empties, and it's like, you need food immediately or you're never.

[C]

No, that.

[D]

We always find the airport.

[C]

That's what's dangerous with Abby is like, she doesn't even know. Like, it's kind of like with cj, he doesn't tell you when he's hungry. That's Abby. So I have to, like, predict. I have to do, like, a predictable analysis to know when she's gonna be hungry.

[D]

I take care of myself.

[C]

Guys like it. Like, at Disney. I could tell Abby was so hungry, and so I got Wetzel's pretzels, but I knew that she did not want to do that because it was gonna slow us down from getting in the park. And then when I brought the pretzels, then she ate some and the kids ate some because everyone was hungry, you know?

[B]

Yeah, totally. That's good. That's good. Yeah. You're just anticipating your wife's needs. Who's more likely to overthink a social interaction for days?

[C]

Oh, me, for sure.

[D]

Matt Howard.

[E]

I. I will.

[D]

Yeah, you do.

[B]

Kayla.

[C]

I'm surprised you're saying that.

[D]

I'm surprised you're saying that too.

[B]

I think in high school, you used to care more so about, like, what people thought about you.

[E]

Yeah, I feel like everyone cares.

[B]

I didn't really care.

[E]

Yeah, you didn't have friends.

[B]

That's true. I had some amazing friends. Just not, like, a plethora of them.

[D]

Some plethora.

[B]

I had amazing friends.

[E]

I'm kidding.

[B]

I know.

[D]

Who's more likely to accidentally overshare? Me. Yeah. Oh, my gosh. Matt Howard. If I could just enter, like, this is if, say, Matt has to call to, like, say, a shingle in our. On our roof.

[C]

Oh, gosh.

[D]

Poor roofer is gonna get a whole Teresa.

[E]

100%.

[D]

There's so many unnecessary details that you just threw in there that this poor guy is just gonna have to sort through.

[E]

I was actually thinking about that today for work. A company we're working with texted me asking when we're gonna be there in the next week. And I was thinking, like, oh, I could give them all these details. I'm like, no, that. That's Mom. She would give so much. So you gotta let him know why.

[C]

No, that's actually so.

[E]

I love you, Mom.

[D]

You gotta let him know why.

[E]

That's just your trait.

[C]

That's one of the best uses of AI for me, is, like, I will just share, like, five minutes of details. So I'll say it to AI, and then it consolidates it into, like, two sentences. And I'm like, oh, yeah, that's what I was trying to say. Like, I. All that other stuff I said literally is not relevant to this person at all.

[B]

So we're gonna do the rest of this extended version on Patreon, and we'll come back.

[E]

These questions are way more juicy.

[B]

Oh, My. No, they're not. But they're gonna be fun. I have some on here that I'm excited to hear you guys answer on. Thank you to Tumble for sponsoring this portion of today's episode. If you guys have a dog, you know that if there's something emergent happening in their body, they're gonna run straight to your one rug that you have in your house and they're just gonna do their business on it. And you know what? This from personal experience. Okay. It might be a plague that I feel that's in our house. And that's why we're so excited about today's sponsor, Tumble. Tumble makes spill proof, stylish machine washable rugs designed for real life. Tumble rugs feature a proprietary spill proof surface that causes liquids to bead up on top of the rug. My son recently spilled a strawberry fruit smoothie all over my rug and it wasn't a big deal because I had tumbled. When you need a deeper clean. Tumble rugs are fully machine washable. Even the larger sizes don't just take

[D]

our word for it.

[B]

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[D]

For this next segment, we are titling it. We asked your wife and we're gonna see how well you guys know us, your wives well, how well Caleb knows Abigail and Matt knows me.

[E]

Can we keep score? Yeah, it could be fun.

[C]

How many games are we playing? This is a lot of games.

[D]

This is not a game. This is a segment.

[B]

This is a segment.

[C]

Oh, okay.

[B]

And it's our last game segment.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

I was actually very curious. I'm like, does Caleb know me? I think you do. Yeah.

[D]

And I have to disclose that we have an advantage because we filmed an episode for our podcast on Tuesday.

[B]

Very similar vibes to this. Okay.

[D]

Very similar vibes.

[E]

So I gotta come to play you

[B]

have to come to play. I also will say I didn't really know how to answer some of these.

[D]

Yeah, there's a couple. I'm like. I'm just. See what Matt says.

[B]

Yes. Okay. The first one is, what is the most annoying thing that you do? That I think is the most annoying thing that.

[E]

That you do.

[B]

No, what's the most annoying thing you do? That I think is annoying?

[E]

That I do.

[B]

What's the most.

[E]

Probably this.

[D]

You know, that you do.

[C]

Probably this.

[B]

No, that doesn't bother.

[E]

No, that's not it.

[C]

That doesn't bother you?

[B]

No, it does bother me, but that's not the most.

[E]

Leaving my socks out?

[B]

No, it doesn't annoy me.

[E]

Wet towel on the bed.

[B]

No, no, it doesn't get me either.

[E]

I don't really do that.

[B]

Sorry. You're exposing yourself.

[E]

I don't really.

[C]

Those are socks.

[E]

Yes. The wet towel. I don't really.

[B]

You don't really do that.

[E]

Is it like putting something away?

[B]

No, it was the fart. Farting in the morning when I was still asleep.

[D]

That's a rude wake up call.

[B]

That's a rude wake up call.

[E]

Wakes me up.

[B]

That's right. Yeah.

[D]

What is it with the morning?

[B]

I don't know. I feel like you've been better lately.

[E]

It's like my alarm clock.

[B]

Yeah, I think because you do wake up. So you've been waking up so early that it hasn't.

[E]

I wake up at 4:45 most morning.

[B]

Yes. I feel like, you know, you're out of the bed during that phase and I haven't heard it lately.

[D]

4:45.

[C]

No, that's, that's like literally a Howard thing. Cuz when I went on my first trip with Abby's family when we were in high school, I ripped one at like just like 7 o' clock in the morning. You woke up and Abby called it trumpet butt.

[D]

No, no, I got that from Abigail.

[C]

Oh, okay.

[B]

It's a real thing.

[E]

It's a Howard thing.

[B]

It's actually a condition.

[D]

It's so shocking. Okay, Matt, what do you, what do you do that annoys me? There's several things.

[C]

Oh, so many things. Chewing. My. Chewing annoys you? My. If I like am. If I. If I get like sniffly with my nose, like I'm like trying to like sniff up like congestion. You're like, that's gross.

[D]

No, no, no, it's. I. I call it yakking.

[C]

Oh yeah, the little. Yeah, little throat thing.

[E]

Oh yeah.

[C]

I'm trying to like swallow. I'm. I'm Trying to swallow.

[D]

And this.

[C]

Okay, I don't do that.

[D]

Yes, you do.

[C]

I do not do that.

[D]

You do.

[C]

I'll do it in the shower, but then it's like, this is my private time. I'm taking a shower. I'm trying to clear up.

[D]

He does a lot of weird things in this. Another one would be when you burp when you're not eating anything. If you're eating something, you burp. That's fine. But like, if you just wake up in the morning and you just burp, like, belch loudly. I'm like, where did that even come from?

[C]

This is what I fart.

[D]

Is that not weird?

[B]

Belches.

[D]

Yeah, and they smell.

[B]

Really burp. No, you don't.

[E]

I feel like I never burp.

[B]

You never burp.

[D]

And he farts a lot. And my worst setting for you farting is in the car.

[C]

The boys think it's so funny.

[D]

Don't do it in the car. Just do it outside before we get in the car.

[E]

Getting a reaction from your sons is great.

[C]

It's so fun.

[E]

It's so cute.

[C]

Dude, that was a good one. That was a good one. So I read them a bedtime story every night. And then after the bedtime story, they want me to tell them another one, but, like, make up a story. And every time the main character has to fart and they laugh so hard. Like for 2 and 3 year old, the funniest. The funniest thing that possibly could happen in a story for two or three year old is someone farting. And then Griffin wants to tell a story and then he's like. And then he tuned and he like, does that. And then Auggie, what's really cute is an Augie will tell a story too. And he basically just, like, does a summary of the story that I told.

[D]

Or Griffin, he'll just repeat.

[C]

Yeah. And I have to, like, help him get through it because.

[D]

Yeah, he gets stuck.

[C]

Some of the words he can't really articulate.

[B]

Oh, my gosh. That's really fun. I feel like we just put you on blast. What's the most annoying thing that I do to you?

[E]

I don't know.

[D]

Oh, Matt will never answer these. He thinks he's getting cornered.

[B]

That's funny.

[C]

I just have trauma from the stupid stuff I've said going viral. Everyone hates me.

[B]

Only. Only clip the thing that you say that you think is annoying. And that'll be the clip.

[C]

Not my list.

[E]

No, seriously, we've already discussed it. It's. It's you being late.

[B]

Yeah. Oh.

[E]

Sends me that's valid.

[D]

Don Deloney just says to go separate. Had I told Matt I was gonna do that, Matt goes, that's rude.

[B]

I think it's rude, too. It hurts my feelings, so.

[E]

Well, yeah, maybe you'll change.

[D]

Okay, but he's the one that's late in their relationship, so I think it was fair for him to say that.

[B]

That's true.

[D]

Okay. What's her idea of a perfect date?

[E]

September.

[D]

It's like a date. Like a calendar date.

[C]

That went over my head.

[D]

Okay, that's fine.

[B]

It's from Miss Congeniality.

[C]

I've never seen that movie neither, but

[E]

I just know it's a thing.

[D]

I thought you just came up with that.

[E]

No, I think it'd be something related to, like, no phones or, like, super intentional. A nice dinner and then maybe something that's, like, New that we've never done before. I was trying to think of the word for it. I don't remember the word.

[B]

Experience.

[E]

Yeah, do, like, something together.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

Novel. Novelty.

[B]

Fun.

[E]

So something that's novel. So I know I'm being vague, but novel. Dinner, minimal phone. So a lot of intentional time.

[B]

I mean, that's amazing. That's a great answer. I did say hike and have dinner. Good food, but I think hike is

[E]

hike, like a new route.

[B]

There you go. Yeah, I love that.

[D]

What do you think I said, Matt,

[C]

for your perfect date? Cheesecake Factory.

[D]

And

[C]

do you want me to say that out loud? Oh, bout.

[D]

Oh, come on.

[C]

A movie. She's a point. Oh. Oh.

[F]

Oh.

[B]

No.

[C]

I know this. And we've done it so many times. We go to Barnes and Noble and we go pick Abby on a book.

[D]

Yeah, that's my. That's what I've learned.

[C]

Abby loves going book shopping.

[D]

Yeah. I like it when you pick out my book for me.

[E]

I barely know how to read,

[C]

but

[E]

I like going to Barnes and Noble. Or, like, when it's. He does when it's snowing. And I know we can't do that here in Phoenix.

[D]

Yeah, that's.

[E]

But it's just, like, that cozy.

[D]

That sounds. That sounds idyllic.

[E]

It's like a coffee.

[C]

And that right there is why we need to move back to Hawaii so that we can just experience, like, snow and Hawaii. Do they have bars on Haleakala, bro?

[B]

You had that really fun. You played that date night in Kansas City where we went to Barnes and Noble and you did a little scavenger hunt and you had different things, like pick out a book that makes you think of this or, like, you know, and we. Then we Came and we.

[E]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

Convened and shared.

[E]

That was fun.

[B]

That was really fun. Okay, the question is, what's her most prized material possession?

[E]

Huh.

[C]

Probably whatever book you're reading.

[D]

Oh, my gosh.

[C]

What? Material possession?

[D]

I could replace that easily.

[C]

Okay, maybe. I think. Oh, you have said that you didn't care about our car when I bought it. But then after driving the Tesla, you were like, I like driving this car, Matt.

[D]

That's not a private.

[B]

It's usually more, like, sentimental.

[D]

Like something that is, like, irreplaceable. There's only one of them.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

All the cards that I wrote you when we were dating.

[D]

Oh, that's a good one.

[E]

I was gonna say, maybe this is a bad answer, but just, like, the security box, that's got. No. Don't you have a keepsake box with, like, birth pictures?

[B]

Yeah, that is it.

[E]

Is that what you said?

[B]

It's not what I said, but that is my answer. Like, yeah. Because now I'm thinking through this a little bit more, and I'm like. While I was like, oh, my memory.

[E]

Ultrasound pictures.

[B]

Yeah. And, like, all of our love knitter love notes and just special. I have special keepsakes from a lot of, like, monumental things.

[D]

This is a really toxic thing about me, but I'm not, like, attached to really any item. I think once I lost my wedding ring the first time, I was like,

[C]

well, oh, yeah, that was on the honeymoon.

[E]

I actually think that's healthy.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

The opposite of that. Turn into hoarders.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

But sometimes I'm like, I really wish something was, like, super, like, that thing.

[E]

This year, we're going on a trip to Italy, and if we have the money, like, I think it'd be fun for you to get a really kind of, like, splurge on a bag.

[A]

Ooh.

[C]

Get a little. Little Louis Vuitton purse.

[B]

I really. That's really sweet that you say that.

[E]

Like, I want you to be able to do something.

[D]

That'd be crazy.

[B]

That'd be really cool.

[E]

And that could be your, like, like, not sentimental, but you're, like, one thing that's like.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

Oh, I just.

[B]

You.

[C]

Do you like designer?

[B]

I have, yeah. I always have, since I was a little kid. I feel like I look at in, like, the art category.

[C]

What's your, like, dream? It's like, for me, like, when I was working at a financial planning firm and I was learning about, like, different corporations, I thought, like, Tesla vehicles were cool. So, like, my dream was, like, one day I'm gonna own a Tesla. Like, is there, like, a bag you're like, one day I want that bag.

[B]

No, I don't have. I've actually been doing some research on bags because we've kind of talked about this. I don't have just one because I feel like I get nervous where I'm like, I don't want to pick one that's trendy or just like, in the moment that I love. But then also I'm like, well, maybe I do just find something that in the moment really speaks to me and I'm feel like, very drawn to. But then I'm like, but then do I just go something really classic? So I don't know. I don't have an answer yet. No, we would never. We wouldn't be offered an Hermes.

[E]

A girl can dream.

[B]

A girl can dream. No, actually, no, it's not Hermes. But there are different brands. I specifically like their style.

[C]

Which brands?

[B]

I like Gucci. I like Louis Vuitton.

[C]

What's different? Like, what makes Gucci and Louis V different than, like, Hermes or other? I just don't know that stuff.

[B]

It's just kind of more like their. The vibe of their house. Like, Hermes is very preppy, very polished. I don't feel like I'm very.

[E]

A polished person, like a Balenciaga girl.

[B]

I mean, Balenciaga is very sporty and cool and edgy. I think they've kind of made a comeback. They were at one point. Yeah. But I'm not a very big Balenciaga. I don't know. I feel like I've. I've been thinking, and I never thought about it a ton because I never really thought it would be something that I would. Like we would ever buy.

[C]

I just saw like, stupid video. Like, Sorry. Yeah. When Lindsay I got canceled, there was just like, prank channels that were like, adding to the fire.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Just like doing stupid stuff.

[E]

I'm just thinking of, anyway, I would want you. And I think for me. And we talked about this the other day, I could see myself like, art.

[B]

Like, Caleb would splurge on. Oh, custom art.

[E]

There was a kind of Art, a YouTube short that popped up, and this guy uses only charcoal and he makes art. And it was like Christian art.

[B]

It's really cool.

[E]

Like, amazing. Incredible. But his stuff was like 10k or 20. Really?

[C]

Like the g. Like the Jesus painter guy. The guy that paints Jesus.

[E]

This guy's way better.

[B]

This guy. I mean, it's like, it's.

[E]

It's art. Art.

[C]

Really impressive, I think. Oh, yeah.

[E]

Which obviously we can't afford that, but.

[C]

Yeah, I, I. Yeah, I feel like in my head, if I ever made, like, a. Like a big splurt. Like, I'm talking. Well, how much are those bags?

[B]

They're like three. Two to three thousand.

[C]

Okay. Okay.

[B]

Yeah, Gotcha. Yeah. I mean, some can get up to, like, 25. You know, I mean, it depends on the brand, but that makes sense. Majority of them kind of fall in, like, the two to five.

[E]

I was going to preface it. We don't have the money for. For this, but I'm saying in the future.

[B]

Yeah, it's like a goal. It's one of our goals.

[C]

Yeah, I like that.

[E]

But you guys don't have anything.

[C]

We don't. Abby has no designer stuff.

[D]

Don't have anything. Design.

[E]

Not currently. Or, like, you don't have an item that's like. Oh, that's.

[D]

Yeah, I thought of one, but it was kind of sad.

[C]

Wait, what is yours?

[D]

I was thinking that mold of Emerson's foot would actually probably be the thing that we would probably want to take. That's the only thing that we could. That we have. You know, that would be the one thing that's, like, irreplaceable. But even that, I'm, like, not specifically emotionally attached to that.

[C]

Did you know that I figured out where I want her name on my arm?

[D]

Wow. Is this the time that you're telling me.

[C]

This is the idea that I had, like, two days ago, but I want to have all of our kids names on my arm, and I want them to write their names. So we need to teach Augie how to write first. Yeah, he's. He's getting. He's catching up fast.

[E]

I mean, you'll have more kids. So just as they can write, they get to.

[C]

Yeah, they get to write their name on my arm.

[E]

Three years old, you get to.

[B]

Oh, that'd be kind of cute.

[E]

For your birthday, you write on my arm.

[D]

I have to do four because we never did it for Griffin at three.

[E]

Oh, yeah. Before, you gotta be four.

[B]

Yeah, that's.

[D]

Give them a little bit more practice on their penmanship.

[B]

Let's just get pretty.

[F]

Trick.

[B]

I don't think I have a party trick.

[E]

I have a party trick.

[B]

What is it? Walking on your toes?

[E]

No. Oh, we'll skip it.

[C]

Why can't you say it? What is it?

[B]

What is it?

[C]

What? I gotta know what it is now.

[B]

Hey, I want to know. I think we've said this before on the unplanned. What? Caleb can lactate.

[C]

It's a party. Oh, my gosh. That's too good.

[B]

That's really good.

[E]

Cut it it's like when I've been working out a lot.

[C]

Wait, why does working out a lot make you laugh?

[B]

It's a thing. I don't know.

[C]

Testosterone makes men lactate.

[E]

I think both levels go up. I don't know.

[C]

Are you kidding me? I didn't know that.

[B]

I don't know. Yeah, it's pretty cool.

[D]

You're telling me testosterone makes you lactate?

[E]

I think all my hormones go up.

[D]

That's the one.

[B]

Working out actually makes them girlier, so.

[D]

Yeah. Remember Bob in college? He used to be like, I can't have soy milk because it gives you boobs.

[B]

That's great. Thank you to Zogdog for sponsoring this portion of today's episode. Episode.

[D]

Raise your hand if you've been putting off a dental cleaning. I didn't write this.

[B]

That's hilarious.

[D]

But it's true.

[B]

It's on my buck. It's on my, you know, bucket list.

[D]

One day before she dies, she will do it. An annual checkup or honestly, any kind of doctor's appointment. Those are so easy to push off. And yes, I am guilty too. That's why I have loved Zoc Doc for years. Honestly, they make finding doctor and booking appointments so, so easy. If you don't know what zocdoc is, it is a free app and website that helps you find and book high quality in network doctors so you can find someone you love. And you heard me right in network appointments. It's huge.

[B]

I actually just booked Caleb a physical and I went on zocdoc because I was. It's so hard to find sometimes doctors in your network and there's so many. And Zocdoc narrowed it down really easily. I could go by region, area reviews. It was perfect.

[D]

And with more than a 150,000 providers across all 50 states, you're going to find a match. I really believe that whether you're looking for dermatology, dentistry, primary care, eye care, or any of the other 200 plus specialties offered on Zocdoc, you can easily search by specialty or symptom to build the care team that's right for you.

[B]

I use Octoc. And you guys should too. Stop putting off those doctor's appointments and just go to zocdoc.com abby. Find and instantly book a doctor that you love today. That Zocdoc. Z O C D O C

[D]

abby.

[B]

Thank you ZocDoc for sponsoring this message. We love you guys.

[D]

Okay, who is her favorite artist? This one's easy.

[E]

Singer.

[D]

Well, not easy, but simple.

[C]

It's Easy.

[E]

Bieber.

[B]

Yeah. Good. It's easy.

[C]

I'm going for you, Johnny. Swim.

[B]

Yeah. Good job. Where is she happiest?

[C]

Disney World.

[D]

Oh, my gosh. That. I'll take that. I put with my family.

[C]

Oh, okay.

[E]

Oh, did you go location or.

[B]

No, I didn't go location.

[E]

Place. Sitting on a couch, watching Love on the Spectrum.

[B]

No, baby, I just said with Caleb,

[D]

and I only said with my family because she said, with Caleb, and I was like, well, I can't be a jerk.

[E]

Abby's like, by myself with a margarita.

[B]

Okay. What's her love language?

[E]

All of them, except for gifts.

[B]

Yeah, you're right.

[E]

But my main one is quality time.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Service.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

Good job. Good job.

[D]

Nice.

[E]

What's mine?

[B]

Words of affirmation.

[E]

What's minutes?

[D]

Yeah, he likes words. Physical touch, too.

[E]

Probably because our parents never gave us words of affirmation.

[D]

Your parents are very affirming.

[B]

Yes, they are.

[E]

I hope they watch very.

[C]

Oh, you know they're gonna watch this.

[E]

My mom's gonna be pissed.

[C]

Should we just.

[D]

Your parents are very.

[C]

Just wave at the camera and say, hi, Teresa. Everybody look in the middle. Camera. 3, 2, 1. Hi, Teresa.

[E]

We love you.

[C]

We love you.

[D]

What does she spend the most money on?

[E]

Grocery budget always gets blown.

[B]

That's what I put.

[D]

Groceries.

[C]

Really?

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

What do you find at the grocery store that you have to have?

[B]

I just buy every. I'm like, yeah, that all looks good.

[C]

That's a good flavor of ice cream.

[B]

Yeah. I'm like, that looks fun.

[E]

We gotta try that.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

What's your budget? I'm so curious.

[C]

What is the budget for?

[D]

She doesn't know.

[B]

I never look at it. I just assume. I'm like, I probably went over it.

[C]

Dude, you know what's crazy?

[B]

Yeah. I have in my head, I'm like, I don't want to go over this number each week.

[E]

That's 600, right?

[B]

600amonth, which is just way too low feeding a toddler.

[C]

I don't know.

[B]

My third person eats nothing.

[C]

What? I think what always cracks me up is how everyone acts like Costco saving you money when, like, we never leave Costco without spending $300.

[B]

Yeah, I know.

[C]

You know, like, you just.

[E]

And you don't have to come back till next week.

[C]

Seriously? No.

[D]

This is the problem with Costco. As soon as I find a snack that I'm like, the kids are going to love these. As soon as you buy the Costco size, they hate it. And then you're stuck with it.

[C]

But Bobo's.

[D]

The kids really led me Astray on Bobos.

[B]

Yeah, that one.

[C]

And look, I love Costco, but, like, you're not saving by more. Buying more. They just have it in like a cool looking bag. Pretty good, you know?

[B]

Yeah. I will say they're fruit. That's why I always go. Because the fruit is so affordable and way better at Sam's. But then the other stuff in the meat too, but everything else isn't.

[E]

I actually do think, I mean, per, like gram or item. You do save, but we can. Yes, you consume more.

[C]

Yeah, yeah. I. The reason we keep our Costco membership, though, is because of their return policy. It's amazing. I've heard of people that like, buy a couch and use the couch for like five years and then just take it back, return it, get their money back.

[E]

That's a sin.

[C]

That's not okay. I'm not okay with that. But like, if we've had defective products and we had a vacuum, we bought from Costco for like 600 bucks, took it back, and there was no questions asked.

[E]

You guys go there for gas?

[C]

We don't do the gas.

[B]

They have electric vehicles.

[E]

Oh, yeah. Well, one, it's true, dude. The line that people stand.

[D]

Yeah. Because gas prices have been so high,

[E]

but you're sitting for 30 minutes in

[B]

your car, you're losing a gallon of gas while you're sitting there. I don't know. I'm like, I don't know about that.

[E]

It's crazy.

[D]

What do I spend the most money on?

[C]

Probably clothes, I think. I think, because I just saw. I just saw, I think like four or five at Zara for our kids, which I'm like, that's okay.

[E]

That's close.

[C]

But yeah.

[E]

What would you say for yourself?

[D]

Travel?

[C]

Oh, yeah, we are. That's one of the most expensive line items.

[F]

Sure.

[C]

Yeah, we do. We do travel a lot.

[D]

Yeah.

[E]

How many PTO days do you guys get?

[C]

That's the thing is we never quite feel like vacation. Like, okay, so like Disneyland. Like, we made a YouTube video out of our Disneyland trip, which was cool. But yeah, what I would like to get better at is, like doing less. I would like to. We should do more intentional travel where we're like, we're not going to record a single thing.

[E]

Maybe one a year.

[C]

I don't know. Just because that would be cool. I feel so, like, it's. I feel so ridiculously lucky that we get to vlog and make that work when we travel. But it would be cool to just like travel and not think about a video and just like be completely 100 present. You know, be cool.

[B]

Okay, last question is, what is her favorite thing about you?

[E]

My biceps.

[B]

I. I was gonna put muscles, but then I was like, well, that's. I was kidding.

[E]

I don't know. When you see me, like, playing with cj.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

It's sweet.

[E]

Or kids.

[B]

I was trying to think of, like, what something that I've. The whole time I've, like, known you and loved you, and I said, he's so wise. Mm.

[E]

Thanks.

[B]

I love everything you say. Love you.

[D]

11.

[B]

11.

[D]

11 times to two weekends. Matt, what do you think is my favorite trait about you?

[C]

My chest. Hey, listen. My chest and my passion. My passion for chest. My passion for chest.

[D]

See, I switched it. I said, said you're friendly.

[C]

That's what I said on our podcast. And you said, passion.

[D]

We can't really get a point for that.

[B]

Yeah, ask. Ask, ask Abby. Well, that was really fun.

[E]

That was fun.

[B]

Yeah. We always do a voicemail segment on our podcast episode, and so we thought it'd be fun if we had voicemails that you guys answered.

[E]

Hey.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

Oh, wow.

[F]

Hey, guys. So fun that the husbands are on the podcast. Funny question for you guys. If you and your spouse got arrested,

[D]

what do you think it would be for?

[F]

Thanks. Love you guys.

[C]

What do you think it would be for arrested? Something really dumb, like, something really stupid,

[D]

like, we forgot to do something. We forgot to pay a bill. That's what it'd be for us. We forgot to pay a bill, and

[C]

we're like, no arrested for. For that. You don't get arrested for no.

[D]

Tax evasion, probably.

[C]

No.

[D]

Honestly, taxes really confuse me.

[C]

The thing. The thing that I was thinking of is, like, if our kid has to, like, really pee and there's no bathroom clothes, probably, like, just go in the bushes, whatever, and, like, jail for that. I don't know, but, like, isn't that technically, you know, public indecency?

[E]

Think about us being public indecency.

[F]

Speeding.

[C]

Speeding.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

I'm not Matt. Okay, going back to the not wanting to answer your phone. You also don't look at your mail. So I could see Matt getting, like, a couple tickets and then not paying them.

[B]

Missing. Missing a court, like, missing duty.

[D]

Missing jury duty.

[C]

Yeah, I could. That could happen to me because of the mail.

[B]

Yeah, that's good.

[E]

But I feel like the. The heart of that question was, like, something you guys did together.

[B]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, you guys could be the public and decency.

[D]

No, we're not like that.

[C]

The thing is, like, Caleb just said

[B]

to me, I was like, that's true.

[C]

We love to get it on, but we're not the couple going out of the bedroom, bro. Like, we've always. We've always been strictly in the bedroom, mostly. Yeah.

[D]

I'm not like that.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

I ain't too scared.

[B]

What would ours be, ma'?

[E]

Am? We are a Christian couple. We don't break the law.

[B]

That's true. But it would be probably public indecency.

[D]

Oh, yeah. Wow.

[E]

What else would it be?

[B]

I don't know, honestly, because. Yeah. I don't know.

[C]

Didn't we. Weren't we making out when we were dating one time when a police officer came up and, like, knocked on the window and was like, you guys need to leave.

[D]

Everyone's had that happen.

[B]

Yeah, they have.

[D]

Yeah. Thank you.

[B]

They have.

[C]

This is a really good makeup.

[D]

Hey, Abby.

[F]

And Abby, this is Gracie. I was wondering if you and your husbands have any marriage advice for newlywed couples getting married here at the end

[D]

of May, and I would like some advice with that as well as any advice for young newlywed couples.

[F]

We are only 19 and 20. Thank you, and have a great day.

[D]

Yeah. What's.

[E]

Congrats, Gracie.

[B]

Yeah, congrats.

[C]

Congratulations. Oh, my gosh. Yeah. I think. I think, like, my number one advice would be, like, have good people in your life, like, speaking. Speaking into your life. You want, you know, a mentor that could be someone from whatever, like, religious institution you attend. It could be a counselor. It could be just someone like that. Like, a couple that you look up to. Just because I think, like, you're going to it. You're like. It's just inevitable that you're going to encounter conflict at some point in your marriage, and you just want to, like, stay the course and remember why you made that commitment to each other. Because I think we live in a world today where people are just so quick to be like, girl, you deserve better. Like, what up? Like. But I think it's like, you just. I think marriage and, like, relationships are about being selfless and, like, loving your partner. Well. And I think if you both approach the relationship from that viewpoint, I think you're gonna have a very long, happy marriage.

[B]

That's great advice.

[D]

I agree.

[E]

But 86% of it won't be solvable, so just don't worry about it.

[D]

Caleb, what's yours?

[E]

You're at the age where there is still so much life to do, and you're not established yet. And we've felt this, like, you know, we weren't. People who are getting married at 30 are, like, understand how life works. A little bit more and are probably more often than not less financially stressed

[D]

and

[E]

just enjoy those times together. Because there will be hard times, but they'll be. It's fun to look back on like, oh yeah, we were slumming it together, you know?

[B]

Yeah. Look at those times in your 20s when you're. We call them our struggle years. But in like a fond way, it's like our time. Your time to like figure it out and try new things and throw spaghetti at the wall and see what works and what doesn't and like struggle together. And I feel like that has given us a fun and a cool foundation for hopefully our successful years.

[C]

You guys would throw spaghetti at a wall for fun?

[B]

Just for fun.

[E]

Yeah, cut that. We can cut that.

[C]

That was bad.

[B]

I liked it.

[C]

Is your advice like, like make money young so you don't have to be stressed or is it like just like enjoy, enjoy.

[B]

Just enjoy your struggles.

[C]

Enjoy it. Just enjoy.

[E]

Enjoy the grind together. Like, enjoy slumming it, Working hard, figuring things out.

[C]

I've never heard that term, slumming it.

[E]

I've never. I feel like it's a term.

[B]

I think it's a term.

[C]

Okay.

[E]

Like you're not gonna move in to. I don't know what they do for work. You're not gonna move into like a $3,000 three bedroom apartment penthouse and whatever city you live in. Like, most likely you're gonna be somewhere more affordable. Almost like most people at 19.

[B]

Yeah, usually.

[C]

Yeah, you kind of like going adventurous together.

[E]

Just do a bunch of new things together.

[B]

Yeah, it's really fun.

[E]

Yeah.

[F]

Hey, this is Cabby. This question's for Caleb and Matt. I'm a long time listener, big fan of the shows and yeah, big fan. Big fan of work guys. But yeah, I know both girls have said in the past that you guys don't think they're mean to you ever, except when you're sick. And I know, man, I just gotta say, like, these Abby's and Abigail and Addy, like they're just so beautiful and funny and smart and amazing, talented and I mean even like humble. Really humble. So I just. My question is maybe do you guys ever look inward maybe? Why? That's my question.

[C]

Who is that? That's Abigail. Wait, that's Abigail? Was that you? That's Abigail. Sound like, dude, that voice, my gosh, that's so funny, smart, pretty. How do you do that?

[B]

I just went like this.

[C]

Hey, this is Cabby. You said Cabby. I was like gabby at the name. I was like, what?

[E]

What name was that.

[B]

Play the question again. That's a good question.

[C]

That's so funny.

[F]

Hey, this is Cabby. This is for Caleb and Matt. I'm a long time listener, big fan of the shows and yeah, big fan. But yeah, I know both girls have said in the past that non stop, you guys don't think they're mean to you ever, except when you're sick. And I know, man, I'm just gonna say, like, these Abby's and Abigail and Addie, like, they're just so beautiful and funny and smart and amazing, talented and I mean, even like humble. Really humble.

[C]

So that was where I knew it was you.

[F]

Maybe. Do you guys ever look inward, inward maybe and see maybe why? Yeah, that's my question.

[C]

Basically. Basically Cabbie. Basically. Basically cabbie's asking, you know, basically saying, we're the problem in our relationship.

[B]

Earlier when I was like, I don't want to talk about the sick things because I knew that question was coming. So I was like, we're not talking about this because I know I had this voicemail planned.

[A]

It's a problem.

[C]

Wait, wait. Let's address this right now. Okay.

[B]

Do you ever think you should look inward like Caleb?

[C]

Can we just establish that our wives become little demons when we're sick?

[D]

Little demons.

[C]

Little demon. Little. Little demon ladies.

[E]

Yeah, they do.

[C]

You know, we cough two times and it's like, oh, my gosh, the horns come out. What a loser. Get over yourself. You're not sick. It's all in your head.

[E]

I sneeze and I like. You just turn into a little. Yeah,

[C]

I'm not very funny, so I should let you make that joke.

[B]

I. I'll say. Well, I just feel like when I'm sick, I'm still going. I don't sleep all day. I don't sit on the couch.

[C]

What do you do when you're sick, Abby?

[B]

Well, you're at work. Scale up. So I'm working. I'm taking care of the kids. You too?

[D]

I have never taken a sick day since we've had children.

[B]

Neither have I.

[E]

We were. We were both growing up pretty good a couple weeks ago.

[B]

Being sick together is a crazy experience.

[C]

Oh, it is bad.

[B]

There's no parenting happening.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

It's movie day for no.

[C]

Yeah, Movies are playing.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

You watch Paw Patrol, Mighty Pup seven times. Maybe not that much. We probably did like two or three movies when we were sick, you know? You know? Yeah. Just survival it is.

[D]

What do I do? I just pretend that I'm not sick.

[C]

I love that for you.

[D]

Just try it next Time. No, one time. I was thinking about recently when you were sick. I was like, you know what Matt always says? I'm so mean when he's sick. I'm just gonna prove to him that I'm not. I made you homemade soup. And I really tried that day.

[C]

That was really.

[D]

But I know that if you were to wake up sick the next day, 24 hours. You had 24 hours for that. That version of me. It was gonna expire the next morning. I was like, if this.

[B]

And then you know what?

[D]

You were better the next day. So I was like, maybe every time I'll just give him 24 hours.

[C]

Yeah, I see. 24 hours of grace.

[D]

And then I. I was like, making.

[B]

See, I was like, deep breath.

[D]

He comes downstairs. You're. Sometimes when you have the sunglasses on inside.

[C]

Yeah, well, you know, when I get a headache from the congestion, it's always freaking congestion. Like, it just hits my head and it feels like there's an elephant on my head. And so wearing sunglasses, less light going in my eyeballs, makes my head hurt less.

[D]

That one gets you.

[E]

I'll bully you for that one.

[D]

That one gets me.

[B]

Yeah, the sunglasses.

[D]

Just sleeping all day. It's okay, you know, what do I

[E]

specifically do that annoys me?

[B]

It's just the sleeping. I'm like, he's just abandoning me.

[D]

He's abandoning me.

[B]

And that just hurts. I did feel really bad when we both were sick, and then I started to feel better and I started eating my soup, and then it was a lot.

[E]

I saw your face change.

[B]

Caleb started, like, gagging because he was going to throw up, but I was sitting there eating my dinner, and he was just gagging at that point. And I looked at him like this, and I go, I'm eating my dinner.

[D]

Mean.

[B]

And then he started throwing up, and it was a lot. And then I immediately felt really horrible because I was like, that was so mean, and I had to apologize. And then I comforted you.

[C]

I feel like when you throw, I

[B]

literally was just like, I'm eating my dinner.

[E]

Or when girls. When girls throw up, it's like. When guys throw up, it's like.

[C]

It's different.

[B]

It's no violence. It's so loud.

[D]

Yours sounds like I scared you. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah, you did. I was like, I think you're like,

[C]

oh, I see why he's feels bad.

[B]

There's a bear in here. I don't know.

[D]

It's so scary. I'm like, do you need to do that? Like, the. Yours is like a really loud cough.

[E]

Everyone's clicked off by now. Certainly. Certainly. I'm done.

[B]

We gotta get out of here.

[C]

That made him leave.

[B]

Well, that prank had me on. Have you ever looked? Have I seen golf this episode? It's because I've been so anxious about that prank.

[C]

Can we answer any more questions from cabin? Does Cabbie have any more.

[D]

Abby, that did not sound like you.

[E]

No, it didn't.

[B]

No, it didn't.

[E]

Honestly, it got me.

[B]

Yeah. Hearing that back, I was like, oh, I should have been a little more obvious, maybe.

[D]

It was so interesting. Yes.

[B]

I was so out of breath.

[C]

What would have been funnier is if you would have asked a real question, and then, like, we answer it, then you're like, you guys die laughing. Like, it. I think you.

[E]

You were.

[C]

You were so close. Like, you could have asked a real question.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

The humble thing. That was what I knew when the name.

[E]

When they said cabbie, I was like,

[C]

what the heck is that name?

[D]

And you start cabbage.

[E]

You start chuckling a little bit, and I'm like, I want to laugh, but I don't want to make fun of this girl's name.

[C]

Well, when you started laughing. Yeah, I didn't want to make fun of her either. And then I started laughing when I realized that it was, like, a prank.

[E]

I just couldn't believe it was your voice.

[B]

Yeah. I don't actually know how I did that. Hey, guys, this is Cabby. And, yeah, that's how I did it. Do we have recipes?

[D]

Yeah, I can do one. Okay.

[B]

Do you want to do recipes, guys?

[C]

Yes, we'd love to.

[E]

So last week, I made breakfast for dinner, and that was tater tots, eggs, and CJ's favorite Jimmy Dean sausages. I made all of that. And then also we had some fruit that was already cut up.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

And some yogurt.

[B]

Perfect.

[E]

And that was dad dinner.

[B]

That was a great dinner.

[C]

When I do dad dinner, it's. I usually grill, but actually, I always grill. I don't think I've. I can't remember the last time that I've, like, cooked our dinner. And it wasn't me grilling, but usually when I grill, which is essentially every single time I grill, Abby will make the broccoli, and then we'll heat up rice in the microwave.

[B]

Delicious.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

What's your favorite grill? Seasoning.

[C]

Abby seasons the salmon, and it's really good.

[D]

I marinate or season it.

[C]

I love salmon, and that's my favorite. I think it just. It's.

[D]

I've never been into marinades more.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

But we do really like the Kinders. They're basic seasonings.

[C]

We've been trying out steak. I did burn the steak two times,

[D]

so we're doing steak again tonight. So you got another chance.

[C]

Yeah, but I learned to turn the grill heat down well, see, you guys

[E]

need to find a happy medium.

[B]

Yeah. You probably get a good crust. I didn't get a good crust, so my inside was. The inside of the steak was perfect, but I didn't sear it enough, so there wasn't, like, a good crust.

[D]

I even like burnt steak, though, so it's okay.

[C]

Well, I mastered how to make chicken and salmon and burgers, and then I try to do steak, and it, like, it's completely different.

[D]

He's the most literal grill chef that exists, but, like, he doesn't mess it up.

[C]

I follow the temperature to the tea. It's all about the temperature of the meat.

[B]

Yeah, you do grill very well.

[E]

Thank you. I'm opposite. I'm more just visual.

[C]

Oh, really? Dude, I could not do that. I could not do that because sometimes there's, like, one random piece that's, like, not hitting 165 when it's chicken. And, like, you cannot serve your kids raw chicken. You're gonna make them sick, you know?

[E]

So it's the bigger piece.

[C]

No, actually, the other day, it wasn't. It was a small piece. It was just on a part of the grill that wasn't getting heat for some reason.

[B]

It's true.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

Okay. Well, I guess they took care of that.

[B]

I love that. Those are good.

[D]

It wasn't really a recipe.

[C]

Matt, if you want to have the best dinner of your life, that's really easy. Just grill some salmon, put a little bit of lemon. What do you season the salmon with?

[D]

Some lemon. Some really good. I love sea salt. They're actually local here. It's se. They have this garlic and herb salt. Sea salt that's on top. That's really, really good.

[C]

Sprinkle the. The salt and then lemon.

[D]

Anything else it comes. I get it pre marinated.

[C]

Oh, but we've done non marinating.

[D]

Yeah. I just use lemon in that salt, and then we put sauce on it at the end.

[C]

Oh, that's actually the special thing that the special ingredient to have really good salmon is put sweet Thai chili sauce on your rice, and then it just, like, pairs so nicely with, like, the broccoli and the lemon.

[E]

I think it'd be fun if you guys did, like, like, what they do on those cooking shows where they cook and you talk at the same. I don't know how you do it

[B]

like we have it.

[E]

They have like a podcast, but you're. You make something for the podcast.

[C]

Wait, that would be really cute. Wait, yeah. What if you lady said a podcast while you're cooking?

[B]

That'd be fun.

[C]

That's a great idea,

[D]

Micah. Okay, well, we have a review. We just want to shout out those of you that like, comment rate, give it five stars. And recently, some of you guys have been hyping us up on YouTube, apparently. Really?

[C]

Really?

[D]

Because our last podcast episode got hyped.

[B]

Oh, yeah, we got hyped.

[C]

How does that work? So we looked it up.

[B]

We did have to Google what that meant.

[D]

It means that some of our viewers, it's a. It's a feature for smaller creators. But like some of your viewers, they get a certain of hypes they can do. And our viewers hyped us.

[C]

Wait, that's so nice.

[D]

I know.

[C]

It's so thanks for hyping them. Yeah.

[D]

So, I mean, I guess just engage however you can with whatever platform you're on to just basically show the platform that you like us and that you intend to come back because it really means a lot.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

And so thank you specifically to Kate and babies who said five stars. Love it. I've been listening to the unplanned podcast since it started, and my favorite episodes were always the sister in law ones. No offense, Matt. I just love girl talk. This new podcast is now one of my favorites and is always hilarious. My 2 year old recognizes Abby's voices in the car and says, we're always here. Keep it up, ladies.

[B]

I love when people tell me their kids always go like, wow, that's crazy. Yes. I've had multiple people tell me because

[D]

I never hear it because we're just in the studio bringing them in every time.

[E]

It is a cute sound clip.

[B]

Yeah, that was really fun. Well, thank you, Kate, for your listening and your review. And thank you guys for calling in, especially Cabbie. That was a really good question.

[D]

Longtime listener, big fan of the show.

[B]

Just hyping up the gal. If you guys want to call in and leave a voicemail, you can call 602-456-9690. And we're just super appreciative. Thank you guys for being on today's episode.

[E]

Thanks for having us.

[C]

Anytime.

[E]

The hottest podcast hosts in the world. I agree.

[B]

Oh, it's sweet. Well, we love you guys and we're thankful for you guys all. And remember, we're always here.