Why My Mom Was Actually Right About Everything

Summary

Podcast Summary – "Always Here"

Episode: Why My Mom Was Actually Right About Everything

Hosts: Abbey Howard & Addy Howard (plus regular guest/producer Abby Biswell)
Release Date: March 13, 2026

Episode Overview

This episode dives into the lessons learned from their mothers—funny, sweet, a little vulnerable, and full of warmth and gratitude. The Abbys (sisters-in-law with the same name) and their guest Abby Biswell reflect on the advice they took and ignored, how their moms shaped their outlook, and the ways mother-daughter relationships evolve into adulthood. There are plenty of hilarious anecdotes, soft confessions, and genuine moments of appreciation for the moms in their lives.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Opening Story Swaps: Motherhood Fails and Family Chaos

• Warmies Fiasco: Addy tells the saga of trying and failing to keep her son CJ’s beloved stuffed "cow" clean, including spinning stories about the toy's "vacation" for the sake of shipping replacements (01:00–03:00).
• Stuffed Animal Sentimentality: The hosts muse about the irrational attachment kids (and adults) have to the scent and scruffiness of their childhood comfort items (03:23–03:47).

2. Transitions in Parenting: Letting Go and Growing Up

• Binky Drama: Abbey shares a tale of her son independently deciding he’s ready to give up his pacifiers, changing her outlook on when to push or wait for milestones—only to have him take one back later (04:05–06:05).

  “I was so proud of him... announced it to all my friends. And then... he wants them back. Honestly, frick.” — Abbey Howard, (06:05)

• Dental Wisdom: A frank conversation with the family dentist leads to the realization that the worst consequence of a lingering binky habit is likely just needing braces – “...I put braces on like 80% of the kids that come in here.” (06:48)

3. Conquering Fears & Redefining Adult Fun

• Ski Stories & Howards’ Motto: The sisters recount recent skiing adventures, sharing their self-motivational mantra “Howards do hard things” and pushing through fears of speed and heights (08:55–10:22).

  “I can do hard things. I can do hard things. I can do hard things...” — Abby Biswell, motivating herself on the slopes (09:13)

• Taking Free Will: Addy reflects on her post-pregnancy urge to try intimidating or out-of-pocket experiences—from tennis lessons to long walks for solo treats (13:13–13:53).

4. Fun Facts Segment: “Wow, That’s Crazy”

• American Emigration: For the first time since the Great Depression, more U.S. citizens are leaving than moving in—with key reasons including cost of living, remote work, and new opportunities abroad (14:15–15:25).
  • Lighthearted banter about citizenship rules, tax obligations, and "pausing your subscription to America" (16:18).
• Mega Beds & Co-Sleeping: Internet fascination with the Alaskan King bed (a $3,700–$12,000, 10-foot-wide mattress) and debate about co-sleeping triggers reflection on sleep routines and physical closeness in parenting (22:07–29:27).

  “When you’re asleep, how much quality time are you getting together?” — Abbey Howard, on couples sleeping (25:01)

5. Main Theme: “Why My Mom Was Actually Right About Everything”

• Confessions of Not Listening: The hosts recount times they should have listened to their moms’ advice and the hilarious (and sometimes cringeworthy) consequences:
  • Over-plucked eyebrows/bangs incident (38:23)

    “…So then I said, I’m going to cut my bangs. She’ll never notice. It keeps getting worse…” — Addy Howard (38:20)

  • Body hair stories, reckless teen driving, ignoring binky/dentist advice, and more.
• Times Mom’s Advice Worked Out: Each host lists pivotal wisdom their mom imparted, and how it shaped their lives:
  • Abbey: “Don’t feel guilty unless you did something wrong.” (47:03)
  • Addy: “Just do it. Why can’t you do it? What’s stopping you?” (49:55)

    “Anytime that I would say I want to do blank… well, just do it.” — Addy Howard (49:55)

  • Abby Biswell: Financial literacy, unconditional love, and non-restrictive expectations in parenting (64:46–65:58)

6. Favorite Lessons from Listeners’ Moms

A rapid-fire segment shouting out profound or practical mom-isms submitted by listeners:

• “Always shower before getting into bed.” — Mara
• “You are who you hang around with.” — Vivi
• “If you don’t ask, the answer is always no.” — Liv
• “Nothing good happens past 11pm.” — Ellie
• “Always make and stick to a grocery list. Eat before you shop.” — Grazy (69:33–71:06)

7. Hope and Encouragement for Listeners

The Abbys reflect on generational change, acknowledging the reality that not everyone has a supportive mom, but individuals have the power to break cycles and start new family traditions (71:27–72:35).

“You have the power… to change your family down the future.” — Abbey Howard (72:27)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “No boy can take a reservation on you.” — Abbey Howard’s mom’s dating advice (53:20)
• “I just feel like that I, that’s one I… even now that I’m 27, I still hear my mom’s voice… don’t feel guilty unless you did something wrong.” — Abbey Howard (48:47)
• “She never complains, she never expects anything back in return, she just gives and gives…” — Addy Howard, about her mom’s servant heart (62:41)
• “If you want to try something, just do it. No question if you can, just will you?” — Addy Howard (50:25)
• “You’re free to make your own decisions in your best interest… nobody else gets a claim on your land!” — Abbey Howard (54:08)
• “There’s such a freedom in your life when you arrive at that point where the opinions of others don’t affect your life.” — Addy Howard (61:06)

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Timestamps for Major Segments

• Introductions & Warmies Saga - 00:47–03:47
• Parenting Transitions/Binky Update - 03:57–06:46
• Skiing Stories & Facing Fears - 08:45–10:33
• “Wow, That’s Crazy” Facts - 14:09–21:16
• Mega Beds & Family Sleep Habits - 22:07–29:27
• Mom Was Right/Listener Confessions - 29:42–37:41
• Eyebrow/Bangs Fails - 38:20–38:46
• Main Discussion: Life Lessons from Moms - 46:26–62:41
• Shouting Out Listener Mom Advice - 69:36–71:19
• Encouragement About Breaking Cycles - 71:27–72:35
• Food Segment & Recipes - 72:42–74:46
• Listener Voicemails (Parenting, Kid Naming) - 75:25–83:16

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Tone & Style

The episode is a blend of candid storytelling, cheerful ribbing, and heartfelt wisdom. The hosts’ dynamic is affectionate, honest, and sprinkled with comedic timing—never shying away from embarrassing stories but always landing in a place of mutual support and gratitude. The language is informal, direct, and full of sisterly banter.

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Final Thoughts

This episode serves up laughter and tears in equal measure, with comforting reminders that moms shape not just our childhoods but our approach to adulthood—whether or not we always listened in the moment. The concluding message is one of hope: every listener has the agency to carry forward the best of what they’ve received, or start fresh with something better.

Transcript

[Abby Biswell]

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[Addy Howard]

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[Abby Biswell]

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[Addy Howard]

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[Abbey Howard]

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[Addy Howard]

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[Abbey Howard]

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[Addy Howard]

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[Abbey Howard]

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[Addy Howard]

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[Abby Biswell]

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[Addy Howard]

and every single one is Zero Sugar. Tap the banner to learn more. I asked her if I could shave my eyebrows and she said no. Immediately shave off way too much. So then I said, I'm going to cut my bangs. She'll never notice.

[Abbey Howard]

It keeps getting worse.

[Addy Howard]

Immediately walk in the house. She goes, what did you do?

[Abbey Howard]

My mom told me not to date this guy and he cheated on me with his cousin. Harley, Are you okay?

[Addy Howard]

My mom is incredibly servant hearted. It's just like the way that she always steps in, especially when these moments when you really need your mom. That's her legacy that I want to pass on to my kids.

[Abbey Howard]

Welcome back to always here. We're your hosts, Abbey Howard and Abbey Howard. And we are here to share the hope in the heart with heart and humor as always.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

How we doing?

[Addy Howard]

Actually, great. Remember when CJ's beloved cow, he has a little warmy stuffed animal.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

That's beloved in our house. And he's loved it for maybe a year and a half. Well, the warmies. The first time I didn't realize that you can't wash this in the washing machine. It just produces the most intense putrid mold smell that engulfs your entire house.

[Abbey Howard]

Because it's filled with something.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah, it's filled with lavender and flaxseed and so I. I got stuff on it and maybe you cooked him. No, I put it in the washing machine. And so then it gets wet and moldy. Oh, yeah. And the mold, like it just never dries out inside. So I ruined his first one. This was like a year ago. And I told CJ that Cal was on vacation. Well, Cal is now on another vacation.

[Abbey Howard]

What happened to cow?

[Addy Howard]

Well, CJ had a diaper accident and yeah, got on cow. So poop. Yeah, I know it was cow on cow. I know it was a dark day, but thankfully Caleb was home, not me, so I didn't have to deal with it too badly. But yeah, poor cow's on another vacation, so I'm trying to decide. I made a whole video last time we made a PowerPoint and I said, cow is in New York. And you know, like he traveled the whole world because it takes a little bit for shipping.

[Abbey Howard]

You need a budget set aside for cows.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah, I. We love the warmies. And from that video it got a lot of views. So we have like a good relationship with warmies now. But I did buy his. His new cow. It's like $20 a cow and people are like, buy multiple. Buy multiple. What do you. What do we think I am maybe made money spends a hundred dollars on cows just to put in the closet. I just bought one. But I think it does pose a question of how long do you go. Like, people don't ever wash their beloved childhood blankets and stuffed animals because they love the smell.

[Abbey Howard]

You're going somewhere different with that question.

[Addy Howard]

Sorry.

[Abbey Howard]

Like, how long do you keep a stuffed an people?

[Addy Howard]

Oh, no, I know. My friends keep it forever and they don't wash them because they love the smell. The smell is comforting and nostalgic. So CJ's cow, it was mangly and just disgusting. So what's the line when you're like, we just have to replace it?

[Abbey Howard]

You know, I actually have no memory of washing any of my stuffed animals.

[Addy Howard]

Right. So maybe I just don't worry about it.

[Abbey Howard]

Well, you know, my kids are not attached to anything stuffed animal. Like. Yeah, we've tried. Yeah, we've tried. I really would like to replace Binky's update.

[Addy Howard]

Oh, this is huge.

[Abbey Howard]

Just wait, there's a follow up.

[Addy Howard]

Okay. I was waiting for two days. I almost texted you and I was like, I'm sure she'll tell on the plot.

[Abbey Howard]

So the other day, our oldest son runs into our bedroom at 10:30pm which is no surprise because bedtime never really. It's like a one and done thing.

[Addy Howard]

Sure.

[Abbey Howard]

It's probably like multiple trips, the whole process.

[Addy Howard]

Of course.

[Abbey Howard]

And so he runs in and he'd been in his room for like a couple hours at this point. Like we hadn't seen him emerge.

[Addy Howard]

And.

[Abbey Howard]

And he has all of his binkies, which should have been gone a long time ago. And it's been attempted many times. One time they were gone for six months.

[Abby Biswell]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

Came back, we needed to sleep again. I needed to sleep without my 3 year old right next to me. And so that was when he was actually two and a half.

[Addy Howard]

Wow.

[Abbey Howard]

It's been a year. So after all of this back and forth, he just dumps all the binkies in Matt's lap. And he's like, I'm ready to get rid of these. I want to give these babies.

[Addy Howard]

Oh, so grown up.

[Abbey Howard]

Like, what? Oh, my goodness. Like, what in the world? And we're like, okay. He runs back to bed, comes back a minute later with one more binky, and he gives it back to Matt and then runs back in his room and goes back to sleep the rest of the night. We didn't see him. He didn't even come in our room. Like, he normally comes in our room.

[Addy Howard]

Wow, that's huge.

[Abbey Howard]

We're like, oh, my gosh. Like, this feels huge. Like, this is like, big time. Like, what? And then in my head, I'm like, my whole outlook on parenting has changed. I'm just gonna wait for the child to tell me when they're ready for transitions. Follow up. Night. Put him in bed. And we're like, okay, night, night. We're, like, trying to leave. And then he's like, but where's my binkies?

[Addy Howard]

Oh.

[Abbey Howard]

And I'm like, oh, well, you gave them to the babies. Like, remember? He's like, no, but I want them. And we're like, no, but you gave him. We can, like, go back and forth for so long.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

Then Matt goes. He comes back in the room and he has one. He goes, I'm giving it back. And I was like, honestly, frick.

[Addy Howard]

Like, we're so close.

[Abbey Howard]

I was so proud of him, too. I literally announced it to you guys. Announced it to all my friends. I told everybody in the world and everyone on this podcast.

[Addy Howard]

Well, maybe he'll have. Maybe it'll be like a back and forth thing.

[Abbey Howard]

I do think transitioning out, because he does keep talking now more about big boy things.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

And, like, baby things.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

And he's kind of starting to separate the two in his mind.

[Addy Howard]

Totally.

[Abbey Howard]

Eventually, they will be gone. But I did have a heart to heart with his dentist, and I was like, hey, just tell it to him straight. I love, like, direct honesty with them. Like, I'm like, you can't drink this because it has alcohol, or you can't drink this because it's caffeine. And so. But, like, we were, like, usually very honest with them. I'm like, hey, you have full permission to tell him that his teeth are going to get messed up. Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

And he goes, I will tell him that.

[Addy Howard]

He goes.

[Abbey Howard]

But also he goes, the worst thing that can happen is that he'll need braces. And I put braces on like 80% of the kids that come in here.

[Addy Howard]

So. True. Okay, well, that's kind of comforting.

[Abbey Howard]

It was comforting to me, but then I was like, but tell him that his teeth will get messed up.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

And he was. Then Griffin's like, yeah, my teeth will get messed up. He's like, it's gonna happen eventually.

[Addy Howard]

Does their palate go back no matter what?

[Abbey Howard]

I don't think it actually. Our dentist didn't seem to think that was a big issue. Like the jaw and the palate.

[Addy Howard]

Good.

[Abbey Howard]

Unless maybe they literally never. They only use it at night when they sleep.

[Addy Howard]

Right.

[Abbey Howard]

But I don't know. He didn't. He didn't mention that because I was like, I was worried about the development. He's like, no, yeah.

[Addy Howard]

Okay, well, we'll trust the professionals.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

I was like, I love the professionals.

[Abbey Howard]

We're never leaving this dentist.

[Addy Howard]

Tell me we love you, dentist. We're seeing you through this.

[Abbey Howard]

It's so wrong. I'm like, I used to this huge

[Addy Howard]

kid and he's just like, oh, he'll get there. He's already getting there. It'll be probably a traditional thing, you know, I'm not.

[Abbey Howard]

Here's what I'm not doing. I'm not sleeping for six months.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah, right.

[Abbey Howard]

That's what I'm not doing.

[Addy Howard]

Anyway, it'll be good. It'll be fine.

[Abbey Howard]

This past weekend was really fun.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

And the whole, like our side of the family went to Flagstaff. It's literally just a two hour drive and there's snow in the mountains. It was warm. Like apparently the weekend before they got like two feet of snow.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

And our weekend was like very warm.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah. So I'm melted and then get icy or what?

[Abby Biswell]

We. I wore a coat when we went skiing, but I didn't really need it. I took off my. I had leggings and then my snow pants. And then I had a T shirt, a jacket, and then my coat. Yeah. I took off all the under layers and just had the top layer. So I want to get wet.

[Addy Howard]

Honestly. Amazing.

[Abby Biswell]

Like short sleeve shirts going down.

[Addy Howard]

But the conditions weren't an oxymoron.

[Abby Biswell]

No, they weren't that. They were like really slushy at the bottom. But we went at the start of the day, so it was still cold.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abby Biswell]

And it was good. But near the end of the day, it was getting a little warmer at the bottom. But it was really fun. I have only gone skiing one time before that, and so it was good.

[Abbey Howard]

To go back in again.

[Abby Biswell]

We love doing it.

[Addy Howard]

You skied, not snowboarded.

[Abby Biswell]

Yeah, we ski. Blake and I ski. You guys snowboard, But I'm not very

[Addy Howard]

good at it at all.

[Abby Biswell]

Yeah, but it was fun. I took the motto from the Howards of Howards, do hard things. And I. Blake made me go on a. On a blue. And I was like, okay, sure, let's do it. I get up there, I look down, and I'm like, oh, how am I getting down?

[Addy Howard]

I can I go back down. I know, by the way.

[Abby Biswell]

And I got up there, and I was like, I can do hard things. I can do hard things. I can do hard things. And then I started singing it. I was like, I can do hard things.

[Addy Howard]

I can do.

[Abbey Howard]

That's amazing.

[Addy Howard]

The whole way, we're really just preaching to ourselves, not our kids. Like, we can do our thing.

[Abbey Howard]

Seriously.

[Abby Biswell]

Like, I wish I was joking. I really am not joking.

[Addy Howard]

No, it's great time. I love that.

[Abby Biswell]

It was fun.

[Addy Howard]

Skiing is scary.

[Abbey Howard]

I've never seen you ski.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah, I haven't done it since college. I want to go back, but I know. You just have to. The initial fear is there.

[Abbey Howard]

It never sounds fun. Like, when you wake up in the morning, you're like, why did we pay this money to do this? Why did we do all the hassle?

[Addy Howard]

Right.

[Abbey Howard]

But then you're like, going down the mountain, you're like, this is actually fun.

[Addy Howard]

So fun and so beautiful.

[Abbey Howard]

You ski?

[Addy Howard]

I ski. Yeah. I. In my head, I'm like, oh, I want to learn how to snowboard. Full well, knowing I would be not okay with that. I'm scared to skateboard. I don't like being actually. I don't like being sideways like that. I like seeing straightforward where I'm going. I also just have a. My two fears in life are speed in heights.

[Abby Biswell]

Oh.

[Addy Howard]

So, you know, skiing is high up and fast. So I just. I'm like. But I want to get over that. I want to conquer those things. I went on the Ferris wheel at Shields with cj, and I was. Every time he moved, I was like, hey, so you just sit down. It's like in a department store Ferris wheel.

[Abbey Howard]

That's true about you. I think we're all this way, but you are, like, really chill.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

About most things, but then there's a few things that you're, like, really not chill about. Yeah. I feel like that's everybody.

[Addy Howard]

Caleb was like, what's wrong with you? He's like, you kept squirming and looking all weird. I was like, I was a little nervous. He goes, that's ridiculous. I'm like, give me some grace. Okay. I was scared.

[Abbey Howard]

And.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah. Heights. Heights and speed. I just don't like feeling out of control of my body. Yeah. Yeah. And that'll do it.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

But I will go. I will.

[Abbey Howard]

My confession is that when Matt taught me how to snowboard, I said a lot of bad words

[Addy Howard]

under your breath.

[Abbey Howard]

That was like, oh, my. And then I started crying because I was hurting so bad. And then my tears started to get frozen to my face because we did. I learned at night skills, skiing, pitch, blackout. Really cold.

[Addy Howard]

Right.

[Abbey Howard]

And my butt hurts so bad because I have a weird tailbone.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

And I thought I broke it. And so then Matt got me a middle school boys football girdle to wear.

[Addy Howard]

Did it help? Yeah, that's actually a great solution.

[Abbey Howard]

I still have it, and I still.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah, you should wear it.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah, well, I don't really fall any.

[Addy Howard]

Sometimes just wear it around the house.

[Abbey Howard]

I actually.

[Addy Howard]

You wear it every time you walk down the steps.

[Abbey Howard]

I should, honestly. But no, I don't really wear it actually anymore when I snowboard. I haven't fallen that much in recent. Recent attempts down the mountain.

[Addy Howard]

The last time I skied, it was in college and with all my girlfriends. So I've never actually learned how to ski. It was just like, get on your skis and go, oh, you didn't do

[Abbey Howard]

it as a kid.

[Addy Howard]

I did once, but it was so long ago that, you know, it doesn't really count.

[Abbey Howard]

I feel like with skiing, you can just go.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

Even if it's not, you just get

[Addy Howard]

a pizza and learn how to cut and stuff.

[Abbey Howard]

Okay.

[Addy Howard]

But they were like, at the end of the day, let's do a blue. Got up there. I was just. I had no skill. Started going down. It was freezing. It started snowing really hard, and the snow turned to ice. And I remember I fell and I couldn't get back up. Every time I stood up, I kept falling. Finally got up, was backwards. Started going down the mountain backwards. I was full on panic attack, crying to, like. The tears were frozen in my goggles. And that was the last time.

[Abbey Howard]

That was the last time we deftion.

[Addy Howard]

I would love to go in redemption, redeem that.

[Abbey Howard]

Matt took Griffin because he was like, if he's gonna learn, he needs to learn when he's little, when he's close to the ground, has no fear, and it just becomes second nature. So it was really cute.

[Addy Howard]

Those videos were adorable.

[Abbey Howard]

And the fact that my mom and my grandma, who's like, almost 80 walked down that mountain just so they could watch him do two runs on the bunny hill. And my dad, they're, like,

[Abby Biswell]

cheering him

[Abbey Howard]

on, and Matt is literally just holding him down.

[Addy Howard]

It's so sweet.

[Abbey Howard]

I was like, wow, the family support is so strong.

[Addy Howard]

I feel like there's been a switch in my. Maybe we just talked about this in the call. Actually, now that I'm thinking about it, there has been a switch with me after pregnancy where I'm like, I want to conquer my fears. I want to do hard things again. And, like, everything that I was scared of before, I. I feel like I have free will. I want to take skiing lessons. I want to take tennis lessons. I want to do all these things that I'm bad at and get good at them. I just want to face them head

[Abbey Howard]

on, you know, let's do tennis lessons.

[Addy Howard]

I would love to do tennis lessons.

[Abbey Howard]

I feel like I would be terrible.

[Addy Howard]

Wait, we should do a segment where we talk about how we want to use our free will and things that we want to do that just seem a little out of pocket.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah. I use my free will the other day, and I went on a walk to get myself a little treat and then walked back, and I was like,

[Addy Howard]

wow, that was amazing.

[Abbey Howard]

That's always been an option. Never. Life is like this. Life is crazy nowadays. By myself for an hour and a half. It was crazy. Great.

[Addy Howard]

That's great. So, yeah, speaking of crazy, should we do. Wow, that's crazy.

[Abby Biswell]

Let's do it.

[Abbey Howard]

Yes. I don't know what it is. Wow, that's crazy. Wow, that's crazy. That's crazy.

[Addy Howard]

It's not that crazy. I actually think this is more interesting and kind of a fun one. So for the first time in 90 years since the Great Depression, more US citizens have left America than come in. Wait, more citizens have left America than come in.

[Abbey Howard]

Wow.

[Addy Howard]

Yes. And I actually. I was thinking about this because I know four girls that live abroad.

[Abbey Howard]

Okay.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah. Like, they've met men. Men. They've met significant others and live abroad.

[Abbey Howard]

And so I was like, wait, I

[Addy Howard]

actually know a lot of people that don't live here anymore and have, like, foregone their. They probably keep their citizenship, but I just thought it was really interesting.

[Abbey Howard]

I don't think you can. Can you lose your citizenship?

[Addy Howard]

No.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah. If you're born here, you're like, yeah,

[Addy Howard]

well, I don't know. Maybe we should back check that. But isn't that interesting?

[Abbey Howard]

That is the first time in 90 years. Because they hate the president.

[Addy Howard]

I don't know I was trying to look up some of the reasons. I mean, I'm sure some people pro. But most of the reasons listed were, cost of living is really high in America. And it's like, okay, I looked up on just Italy, for example. Italy is 30 to 70% cheaper cost of living than America. So if you can live somewhere else cheaper. Also, a lot of people work remote, and there's more hybrid work options and also just opportunity. I feel like there's. It's just easier to go abroad in this day and age than it was in the past.

[Abbey Howard]

That feels overwhelming to me.

[Addy Howard]

To go live abroad.

[Abbey Howard]

Even the thought of, like, buying property somewhere else. Like, we know we have friends that bought property in Mexico. And I'm like, that. How'd you even do that? How'd you even go about that?

[Addy Howard]

That's so true.

[Abby Biswell]

So it says you don't lose your citizenship unless you voluntary, voluntarily renounce it. So then you also don't have to pay, like, taxes and stuff in two different countries.

[Addy Howard]

That's interesting. Did you know that if you work in a different country, you still have to pay American taxes if you're a citizen?

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

So even if you live in a different country and you have a job there, you still have to pay income tax to America. I didn't know.

[Abby Biswell]

That's probably why people would renounce that. They.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah, their citizenship. I guess that's when Caleb told me that, I was like, wait, that's really interesting.

[Abbey Howard]

You pause your subscription to America. Yeah, we pause your subscription. You said pause.

[Addy Howard]

I was like, I don't know. It feels like

[Abbey Howard]

they're like, are you sure you want to cancel?

[Addy Howard]

Go to your email to confirm your kids later.

[Abby Biswell]

You can also lose it if you commit an act of treason again.

[Addy Howard]

See, that one makes probably a lot of sense.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

So what counts as treason?

[Abbey Howard]

Also, it sounds.

[Abby Biswell]

So if you serve in the armed forces of a foreign state engaged in

[Abbey Howard]

hostilities against the U.S. oh, well, yeah, that would be.

[Addy Howard]

I don't have a possibility of that. I don't. I'm not in the military, so I

[Abbey Howard]

don't have a possibility of that.

[Abby Biswell]

You also cannot renounce the citizenship of your child.

[Addy Howard]

That makes sense.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah. That shouldn't be.

[Addy Howard]

I think that's appropriate.

[Abbey Howard]

You make a lot of decisions for your children, but you shouldn't be able to probably make that one.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abby Biswell]

Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

So that's the. Wow, that's crazy fact.

[Abbey Howard]

That is a fun fact.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah. Would you live abroad ever?

[Abbey Howard]

Would I live abroad? Yes. Would I move permanently? I don't. I don't Think that would happen? Yeah, I don't even. I just. Yeah, we're really close with our whole family. Like, I just would. It would be really hard to leave. I feel like the people doing that, probably my guess is that they're not as close with their family.

[Addy Howard]

I don't know. The ones that I. The girls that I know from college and high school that all live abroad are close with their families.

[Abbey Howard]

How could you be super.

[Addy Howard]

Well, their significant others are from these other countries.

[Abbey Howard]

They just call a lot.

[Addy Howard]

I don't know. Honestly, I feel like they travel a lot based off of their social media and stuff. But yeah, I. I just. I would definitely would. I think it'd be really cool. I don't think. I don't think I'd ever permanently move.

[Abbey Howard]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Addy Howard]

No, but I would love to go. I mean, would everyone has a dream to, like, live in Italy for a couple months and.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah, a couple months.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

Or even a year. Like, that would. I just don't see myself permanently. I love America.

[Addy Howard]

Where are the places that you would move domestically or abroad? Like, what? I would love to live in New York City for just one year.

[Abbey Howard]

See, for me, I would like New York City for one summer. Oh. Like, I don't know if I would want it. I don't think I could do it for super long. Gosh. I always say, I like, everyone loves Nashville. I feel like everyone's moving to Nashville. I could. When we. We spent a month there and I was like, I could see myself, like, living here. If one day, like, our whole family moved, like, I'd be like, oh, yeah, sick. I'm in.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

I could see myself living there.

[Abby Biswell]

I have no desire to move. If I moved anywhere, I'd go back home. No, honestly, I'm like, not a travel person. I don't want to live abroad. I don't want to. I don't know. I'm just really stuck in my routine and my schedule in my home that I would. It would really throw me off to like, go and be in a different place. I'm not super adaptable. I've realized.

[Addy Howard]

I feel like you are, though. I feel like your move here, you've made friends join community. I feel like it's been.

[Abby Biswell]

But I feel like that was very, like a thought out decision of, like, are we gonna move here? Are we gonna do that? Like, knowing there's family and friends.

[Abbey Howard]

Like, you had to, like, being.

[Abby Biswell]

I had to be intentional about moving here. I would never move somewhere if there wasn't like, family or a Reason to be there. I don't think I would just do it for fun. I don't think that would be.

[Abbey Howard]

Well, I feel like that's for me, that's the purpose of travel. Like, I'm like, I just.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

Like that doesn't really count as moving if it's for like a temporary thing. Sure. You know.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah. I couldn't think of any other city besides Phoenix that I would want to live and domestically and then the other place I'd be just great for traveling or spending extended time in. So. Yeah, I don't really see us.

[Abbey Howard]

Nashville feels like home in a way that's weird because I've never lived there like it is. I'm thinking of Franklin specifically.

[Addy Howard]

I feel like it from what I'm sounds like, it does sound like a hybrid of the fast paced kind of opportunity feel of the west with the cozy Midwest charm.

[Abbey Howard]

It really feels Midwest. Not. It doesn't feel Southern in my opinion.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah, I would consider that Midwest to me.

[Abbey Howard]

Well, if you go to Memphis now that feels southern and they're like not that far.

[Addy Howard]

Well, I say if you go to Springfield, it's Southern.

[Abbey Howard]

But Missouri, Fake Southern.

[Addy Howard]

I think Missouri is the Midwest, but that is a hot debate on my Instagram.

[Abbey Howard]

You're kidding. They think it's the South?

[Addy Howard]

Yes.

[Abbey Howard]

What?

[Addy Howard]

Yes is not.

[Abbey Howard]

The south would be appalled by that.

[Abby Biswell]

I think we're the most Midwest that you could get.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

As middle of the country.

[Abby Biswell]

Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

Besides Kansas, they were just kind of middle.

[Abby Biswell]

I guess we're not really that far west.

[Addy Howard]

We're kind of just Midwest is a weird name for it, but yeah. People really think Missouri's the South.

[Abbey Howard]

Wow.

[Addy Howard]

We all disagree, but that's not true.

[Abbey Howard]

Wow.

[Addy Howard]

That's crazy.

[Abbey Howard]

That is crazy. Thank you to Cozy Earth for sponsoring this portion of today's episode.

[Addy Howard]

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[Abbey Howard]

I believe that. Actually.

[Addy Howard]

I do too. When it's hot, I'm like, I ain't sleeping.

[Abbey Howard]

Not rested. And that's what Cozy Earth whole design is based on. Because their bamboo sheets are temperature regulating, guaranteed to give you a comfortable night's sleep every single night.

[Addy Howard]

Cozy Earth sheets are made from viscose from bamboo. They naturally wick away heat and moisture from your body, helping you sleep several degrees cooler.

[Abbey Howard]

Which is really convenient because we live in the desert.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah. I actually needed to be cooler.

[Abbey Howard]

Yes. Often they offer a 100 night sleep trial so you can try them for yourself and you can guarantee that you

[Addy Howard]

like them or else, yeah, you can send them back. That's, that's really nice.

[Abbey Howard]

Which is great because they are an investment. But I do not think that you will be disappointed. Every detail is designed to feel effortlessly comfortable. Returns are easy. But after feeling this level of comfort, you probably won't let. Want to let them.

[Addy Howard]

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[Abbey Howard]

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[Addy Howard]

Discover how care in every detail transforms simple routines into moments of true comfort and ease. You can head to cozyearth.com and use our code ABBY for up to 20% off. That's code ABBY for up to 20 percent off.

[Abbey Howard]

And if you get a post purchase survey, be sure to mention you heard about Cozy Earth right here. Experience the craft behind the comfort and make every day feel intentional.

[Addy Howard]

There is another one. Addy's going to leave this one off because I don't know anything about another crazy thing.

[Abby Biswell]

Another while that's crazy that we've actually talked about before, but you could never find exactly what you were trying to talk about. Hunter Primo. If that's how you say her last name.

[Addy Howard]

Oh, she's from Nashville.

[Abby Biswell]

Posted about her mega bed.

[Abbey Howard]

Oh yes, I've, I've, I've followed that and it.

[Abby Biswell]

And it just has 2.1 million views on Tick Tock. She posted a couple days ago. So I put the Tick Tock in there and she talks all about it to explain to people about her mega bed. And it is the Alaskan king bed.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah, it's called an Alaskan king bed.

[Abbey Howard]

Yes, I follow her and I saw this on Instagram.

[Addy Howard]

Wait, let me see it. So wait, what were the dimensions of the bed? She said it's 10ft by 108 inches long or 180 inches long.

[Abbey Howard]

I don't know.

[Addy Howard]

1.

[Abbey Howard]

I can't fathom that many inches.

[Addy Howard]

I can't imagine fathom that many inches either, but I know it's probably bigger. We have a king bed in our room and I can't walk, so I'm just like, wow, that's impressive.

[Abby Biswell]

The original. What did she say? She has the Biggie.

[Abbey Howard]

The Biggie.

[Addy Howard]

Smalls.

[Abby Biswell]

She has the Biggie. Okay, the Biggie.

[Addy Howard]

How much is it?

[Abby Biswell]

Biggie Junior. That's right.

[Abbey Howard]

I bet it's very.

[Abby Biswell]

I can tell you, but it's 120 inches by 108 inches. Okay.

[Abbey Howard]

Wow.

[Addy Howard]

10.

[Abby Biswell]

What are your guesses at how much that cost?

[Addy Howard]

I'm going to say three.

[Abbey Howard]

What? The bed?

[Abby Biswell]

The mattress.

[Abbey Howard]

For the mattress.

[Addy Howard]

I'm gonna say three cat. 3,000.

[Abbey Howard]

Potentially more.

[Abby Biswell]

Oh, 3,700. Yeah, but that's a thousand dollars off. So the full price is 4700.

[Addy Howard]

Wow. I mean, but then you have the

[Abby Biswell]

bedding and the sheets.

[Abbey Howard]

It's custom. Well, the actual bed, too, because what is the bed frame?

[Abby Biswell]

Do you want upholstered? Leather?

[Abbey Howard]

She had upholstered.

[Abby Biswell]

Okay. Upholstered.

[Abbey Howard]

I think.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah, I think so. It was beautiful.

[Abby Biswell]

Depends on what you want. The cheapest option is a platform, and it's 1900.

[Addy Howard]

Wow.

[Abby Biswell]

An Alpine, that's 4800.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abby Biswell]

There's a bunch of. They have a bunch of different designs, but they range up to $12,000.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

Oh, my gosh.

[Abbey Howard]

It feels like kind of custom.

[Addy Howard]

I feel like I could see nbl, NBA players needing beds like this. You know, really massive football players. And then mothers that love to sleep with other children.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah, they would. Wait, why is this crazy?

[Abby Biswell]

I think it's just crazy because there's a lot of differing opinions on having a sleeping co. Sleeping. Like, getting a big bed. The most, like, comment on this says, do you not like your husband? Even though the husband said he prefers it.

[Addy Howard]

I honestly feel that when Kilburn switched from a queen to a king, I felt isolated on a little island in

[Abbey Howard]

the king, because, you know, in a

[Addy Howard]

queen, we were always arm to arm because they're both large people. Like, I'm tall, and he's a big dude. So we were, you know, neck and neck. And now. And it came back. I'm like, where did you go? Where's he at?

[Abbey Howard]

You know, this was my thing. I'm like, when you're asleep, how much quality time are you getting together?

[Addy Howard]

I guess more than I assumed.

[Abbey Howard]

No, you're not really getting any quality. You're asleep.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah, but I was getting a lot of physical touch. Nonsensical physical touch.

[Abbey Howard]

Like, when you're not want physical touch while we're sleeping.

[Addy Howard]

I sleep like Blake made on top

[Abby Biswell]

of me the other night while he was asleep.

[Abbey Howard]

Blake is a really weird secret. Him and my daughter.

[Addy Howard]

That is really weird.

[Abby Biswell]

He said, Blake. He's like, what? I'm like, you're on top of it.

[Addy Howard]

Hello.

[Abbey Howard]

Is it filling your cup because you're asleep?

[Addy Howard]

Yeah, I think because he's gone all day, I love to touch him at night.

[Abbey Howard]

Okay.

[Addy Howard]

I'm a clingy. Wife. But it's okay.

[Abbey Howard]

It's okay.

[Addy Howard]

We're isolated now.

[Abbey Howard]

No, like, my thing is, I'm like, if I feel like I used to think that I'm like. But actually, when you really think about it, for me, I was like. I was unconscious. Like, I'm. I'm. I'm done. I don't. I go to bed.

[Addy Howard]

I don't wake up. Sure.

[Abbey Howard]

Like, I'm like. So it wasn't like, oh, that was not really necessarily bonding us just to sleep in the same bed, which we do sleep in the same bed. And our son does sleep with us, but not in the bed with us.

[Addy Howard]

I don't think it's co sleeping if your bed's that big, to be honest. It's like, you have, like, a lot of space. You're not even near each other. You're on different planets. You're not in that bed.

[Abby Biswell]

You're not touching each other. They have the dogs on the bed too.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah, I think they're fine.

[Abby Biswell]

It says a developmental psychologist here. Children will eventually want to sleep independently. Co sleeping with children if they need it. Provide security.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah. I mean, I'm not doing it, but I don't have an opinion, really.

[Abbey Howard]

Well, I don't think anyone really should have an opinion on how people sleep.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah, I'm like, whatever.

[Abbey Howard]

Like, what works for you guys is great. Yeah. No, I would actually. At one point, Matt and I were like, we need to just get a bigger bed. But we also really like falling asleep together because of intimacy.

[Addy Howard]

Right.

[Abbey Howard]

So then we, like, let him come in once his little hatch light is a certain color we can have. He can't have free access to our bedroom.

[Addy Howard]

No, of course.

[Abbey Howard]

That was psycho.

[Abby Biswell]

This weekend in Flagstaff is that. You guys brought the hatch? And so we're all there. We're staying up late, you know, things like that. And so Blake's downstairs, and he's still awake. Matt and Abby have already gone upstairs. They're in their room. And Blake looks over and sees Griffin's head outside, like, just looking down from the stairs, and he's like, buddy, are you. Are you supposed to be awake? He goes, yeah, I can go in my parents room. The lights. The light's blue. Blake doesn't know this, so he's like, are you sure?

[Abbey Howard]

Like, are you.

[Abby Biswell]

Are you sure you're allowed? Yeah, the lights. The lights blew.

[Abbey Howard]

Every night he starts to open the

[Abby Biswell]

door, and Blake's like, I don't know. I don't. He goes, go downstairs, Coco.

[Addy Howard]

Oh, my God. She's like, it's fine.

[Abbey Howard]

He's like, his light turns blue at 11:30.

[Addy Howard]

Oh, that is sweet.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah. Yeah, I can. I totally see the appeal. Your kids like, everyone just for some families, at least for us, like, everyone just slept so much better. And I'm like, you know what? At the end of the day, I just want to sleep. And so, like, that was like the way it was happening. And I can see. But I can see kids being very different. Like, my second. There's just not a world where he would be able to sleep in the

[Addy Howard]

same bed as us.

[Abbey Howard]

He doesn't even understand the concept of it. Like, one time he woke up really early and we're like, just get in here.

[Addy Howard]

He's like, what do you mean, what are we doing? Yeah, CJ's kind of like that.

[Abbey Howard]

He's. He needs a sleep deprivation tank.

[Addy Howard]

Right, Right.

[Abbey Howard]

So I was. He's like, what is. He's like, where's your tent? Where is your little tent?

[Addy Howard]

That's hilarious.

[Abby Biswell]

So.

[Abbey Howard]

No, that's sweet. I see us evolving into that at one point. We have the space in our room I could see happening.

[Addy Howard]

I feel like co sleeping with an infant feels very different than a toddler.

[Abbey Howard]

I wouldn't want that. I'd be really anxious about that.

[Addy Howard]

Same. So that's why I'm like, when people get upset about toddler's co sleeping, I'm like, why?

[Abby Biswell]

Well, she also mentioned she hasn' controversy also. And she said. She said in that video, they don't sleep in the bed. She sleeps in her room, and when she gets big enough, they'll come and sleep in the bed.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah. I just. I don't really understand the controversy with that. When the kids get old enough to sleep in a bed. You know what I mean?

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah, that happened. It'll all happen. It'll all happen.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

It's okay if it's at different timings.

[Addy Howard]

Totally.

[Abbey Howard]

It's okay if your kid has binkies forever. Let me just say that for myself.

[Addy Howard]

It'll be fine. Abby, he's doing great.

[Abbey Howard]

Hey, it's. No, Abby, trust me. I laid down on that one.

[Addy Howard]

I was just like, yeah, he'll eventually.

[Abby Biswell]

That's why I feel bad. I'm like, your mom always, always tells the boys, like, brielle doesn't need a binky. I'm like, you don't have to tell them that.

[Abbey Howard]

She uses her thumb.

[Abby Biswell]

She uses her thumb. She still uses something.

[Abbey Howard]

I love it.

[Addy Howard]

Well, it's great.

[Abby Biswell]

I can't cut that one off.

[Abbey Howard]

Well, speaking of moms, Was that smooth enough? I mean, speaking of moms, today is or today's episode is really about things our moms taught us.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

And, you know, I feel like we're all very grateful to, like, have really involved moms that enjoy being moms and being involved in our lives, even as adults, which I seriously, I do not take lightly at all. It's, like, such a blessing. There's literally. There's nothing like it. So we're really grateful for that. But I think we can also, before we get into that, relate to times that we should have listened to our moms and we did not, and we learned the hard way.

[Addy Howard]

Yes.

[Abbey Howard]

So we asked you guys some of your stories about times that you should have listened to your mom and you had to learn the hard way.

[Addy Howard]

When in middle school, she told me my excessive eyeliner did not look good, and I should have listened. I wore so much eyeliner in middle school.

[Abbey Howard]

That actually reminds me. You did?

[Addy Howard]

Yeah. Pencil eyeliner all the way around my eyes.

[Abbey Howard]

Wow.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah. I just feel like that's what we thought to do.

[Abbey Howard]

No. I wore mascara one day to sixth grade, and someone was like, do you have mascara on? And I was like, no. And then I never wore it again to sixth grade. I didn't wear makeup for. Until maybe eighth grade.

[Addy Howard]

In sixth grade is when I started wearing eyeliner. In eighth grade, I started wearing a lot of eyeshadow. And I used to wear purple eyeshadow because I read in Seventeen magazine that it made brown eyes pop. Of course. And then I used to just, like, pile on my face. And one time I had a volleyball coach ask me, why do you feel like you need to wear so much makeup? And I know she meant it in a nice way, but I was like, because I feel pretty. I didn't think anything of it. Now looking back, I'm like, I think she was trying to lovingly tell me I shouldn't be wearing that much makeup.

[Abbey Howard]

Maybe not her place, though.

[Addy Howard]

Probably not.

[Abbey Howard]

But no, My mom always. This is. This reminds me. My mom always told me, she's like, do not put a ponytail at the base of your neck.

[Addy Howard]

Really?

[Abbey Howard]

Why? I. She's, like, higher up.

[Addy Howard]

Oh, she was a facelift.

[Abbey Howard]

She. Well, I don't even think it was that. She was just like. I would literally just, like, slick it and put it at the base of. And now, ironically enough, that's. That's kind of a trend. Maybe not, like, how I was doing it. I was doing it, like, super low. Like, as low as I could possibly get it. And I Remember her? And my grandma would always be like, abby, wear your hair down. Don't do that. It looks so pretty down. I was, like, bothering me.

[Addy Howard]

Whatever.

[Abbey Howard]

Mom then wrote in and said, wearing my retainers after braces. Rip.

[Addy Howard]

Oh, my gosh. It's so hard.

[Abby Biswell]

Yes.

[Addy Howard]

Did that happen to you? Your teeth moved? Yep. Years and years for the metal mouth for the braces. Yeah. It's a hard one.

[Abbey Howard]

No one wears their retainers.

[Addy Howard]

I wear my retainers.

[Abbey Howard]

You do?

[Addy Howard]

At night. Like, I try to wear it once a week just to keep them at this point. Yeah. Fair. I'm like, they're there. They're moving.

[Abbey Howard]

I never had braces, so can't relate.

[Addy Howard]

Beautiful teeth, girl. Okay. Lily said, my mom told me to not drive on oxycodone. Everyone was fine, but never again. I like leaving some space for some thoughts there.

[Abbey Howard]

That's illegal.

[Addy Howard]

That's what.

[Abbey Howard]

That's not just your mom. That's the law.

[Addy Howard]

That's actually everybody. Lily, I love it. You live and you learn, girl.

[Abbey Howard]

Glad everyone fine.

[Addy Howard]

My gosh.

[Abbey Howard]

Never again.

[Addy Howard]

That's never again. Yeah, she's. She figured it out.

[Abbey Howard]

Okay. The queen of the castle.

[Addy Howard]

I love that username.

[Abbey Howard]

Said when she said to drive safe. And at 16 years old, I thought I was big and bad and ended up totaling a car.

[Addy Howard]

Oh, I used to drive so reckless at 16.

[Abbey Howard]

Oh, I know.

[Addy Howard]

It's so scary. Oh, man. My mom and dad are right. This person doesn't have a name. But this is a little bit of a longer story. Not me, but at time, my brother should have listened to my mom for me. I was probably 2, and my brother was 7, and my mom asked him to take me inside because she was pulling the car around to wash it on the side of the house. I was sitting in the front yard playing in a bucket of water. My brother did not listen. My mom pulls the car around, clearly thinking I'm inside with my brother and not in any danger, and I'm sitting in the yard. He runs the door. After realizing my mom was driving through the yard where I was, she sees him standing in the door and asks where I am, and he is just blankly staring at her, looking terrified. I was under the car, safe between the wheels, but nonetheless under the car. Thank God. My mom drove a very large car and I was very small. I was not hurt at all. I actually do remember a little bit of it. I was wearing white sandals and the wheel rolled over the top of my foot. I remember being incredibly sad that my white shoes had black tire marks on Them.

[Abbey Howard]

That is so bad.

[Addy Howard]

That's so scary. I actually have a fear of that with, like, C.J. and Vivian. Oh, my gosh. I need a padlock. Every door that goes out to the front.

[Abbey Howard]

Oh, yeah.

[Addy Howard]

Because, you know, you think your. Your older kid, you know, you're like, oh, the youngest can't unlock the door or whatever, but then your older kid can. What if the oldest kid leaves the door unlocked or something?

[Abbey Howard]

You leave the. We have like a magnet sensor, and so it says front door.

[Addy Howard]

Oh.

[Abbey Howard]

Or it'll be like back sliding door, garage door. So I know whenever a door is open. Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

It talks to you.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

I should get the talking ones.

[Abby Biswell]

My parents also had the latches over the tops of the doors, so we couldn't reach them. So when we tried to open the door, you can only open. Open it like, two inches. But.

[Addy Howard]

Oh, smart.

[Abbey Howard]

It's really spooky.

[Addy Howard]

That's really spooky. It makes me think of, like, he runs the to the door, trying to, like, get. Not get himself in trouble from his mom. But it just makes me think of the time where your mom texts you and, hey, can you thaw the chicken? And then you're watching TV or something, and then you hear the garage door open and you, like, immediately run to the freezer and pull the chicken out. You're like, everything's fine.

[Abbey Howard]

It's been doing it for a long time. I don't know why it's still hard.

[Addy Howard]

I don't know why it's still frozen.

[Abbey Howard]

Carly said, my mom told me not to date this guy, and he cheated on me with his cousin. Carly, are you okay with his cousin? Well, I guess. I guess at that point you're like,

[Addy Howard]

you're checking in wellness.

[Abbey Howard]

We're never gonna make this. Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

Actually, this is for the best.

[Abbey Howard]

This is really.

[Addy Howard]

We dodged a bully here.

[Abbey Howard]

I figured there'd be a lot of boy related ones.

[Addy Howard]

Yes. Rebecca said when she told me I would get diarrhea if I expired chicken. Cry face.

[Abbey Howard]

Oh, that's a fear.

[Addy Howard]

They're always right about that one.

[Abbey Howard]

Charlotte says not to buy any newborn onesies. My baby was born. 99th percentile.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah. 0 to 3 immediately. 0 to 3. Katie said my mom told me to use the outhouse, and I said no and didn't make it home. It was the day before my driver's test, and I was wearing shorts.

[Abby Biswell]

Poof.

[Addy Howard]

Got all over the seats. And I had to borrow someone else's car to take the test.

[Abbey Howard]

She still took the test. She's like, I'm getting My life.

[Addy Howard]

She's like, sorry, nothing can stop me.

[Abbey Howard]

The outhouse.

[Addy Howard]

Do you remember? I remember taking my 16 year old driver's test and I was so nervous. I got out of the car and my shirt was fully soaked with sweat from armpits.

[Abbey Howard]

I would be nervous in Missouri too, because you guys don't have any kind of driver training.

[Abby Biswell]

It was crazy to me that you guys took driver's training in school.

[Abbey Howard]

We took. No, we took two classes. We took a behind the wheel class at school, like with a teacher in a car. And then we took a seated class about the rules of the road.

[Addy Howard]

Oh, wow.

[Abby Biswell]

You just show up.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah, I'm sorry.

[Addy Howard]

Like, look, everybody let these kids out

[Abbey Howard]

on the streets and it shows.

[Abby Biswell]

Barely passed, but I passed.

[Abbey Howard]

It honestly does show.

[Addy Howard]

It honestly does.

[Abbey Howard]

Abby, when did you not listen to your mom? When you should have.

[Addy Howard]

The first story that popped in my head when I was thinking about this, I was in middle school and I. My ethnicity is mostly white, but I'm a quarter Lebanese and a quarter Italian, so I have dark features and I have a lot of hair. And I just remember very young age getting a mustache and my mom being pretty forthcoming about helping me take care of that. The one thing that I was insecure about that my mom was not as forthcoming with me about was my unibrow. Okay. And I kept, I remember asking and she was like, you don't have a unibrow. But to me it was one.

[Abbey Howard]

Oh, she wasn't. She was thinking it wasn't.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah. She didn't think it was an issue. I felt like I had a unibrow when I look back at pictures, I did. So she was. I don't know why she's being honest at that point.

[Abbey Howard]

She was lying to me at that point.

[Addy Howard]

Normally she's very honest about those things. So I remember I. I think I was in sixth or seventh grade and I felt like I was going behind my mom's back because I asked her if I could shave and wax my eyebrows and she said no. And my neighbor's mom had one of those little electric facial hair razors and I had never. Yeah, I was like, this is, this is just such an incredible invention. I've never heard of such an amazing product. I must use this immediately. I take it to my eyebrows immediately. Shave off way too much. Just immediately my eyebrows went from really close together to pretty far apart and it was just on one side uneven. So naturally, my 11 year old brain, I said, I have to even this out. So then I went to the other Eyebrow. I shaved that one over too far. So now I had two half of eyebrows. And then what did I do to fix that? Because then I started panicking. I said, oh, my gosh, my mom's gonna kill me. I shaved off my eyebrows. So then I said, I'm going to cut my bangs. She'll never notice.

[Abbey Howard]

Abby. It keeps getting worse.

[Addy Howard]

And it wasn't just like a straight down bang. It was a hard side bang. So I cut a crazy side bang, put a headband, you know, over it, obviously, of course. And walk out the house. I'm like, my mom will never notice. Immediately walk out the house. She goes, what did you do? Immediately freaks out.

[Abbey Howard]

Like, she yells.

[Addy Howard]

I start crying going, I don't know, Mom.

[Abbey Howard]

I got a hand.

[Addy Howard]

I started shaking.

[Abbey Howard]

Crying just keeps progressing. It just keeps getting worse.

[Addy Howard]

Ah. There are a few times like that.

[Abby Biswell]

Dang.

[Abbey Howard]

My mom did help me with the body hair. Now I think about it because I was actually super young and I. I'm actually. How good is my memory as a kid? I don't really think it's that great. But in my head, I remember who this kid is. And honestly, it could go back to him, but I bleep it out.

[Addy Howard]

They were coming for you.

[Abbey Howard]

I, like, know him still kind of. It's totally fine. He has no memory of this.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

My brain has told me this story that at story time in Mrs. Smith's class, I'm sitting cross legged and he's like, your legs look like a bear. Wait, what age? Second grade.

[Addy Howard]

Oh, wow.

[Abbey Howard]

This is. But my mom and I told my mom, I was like, I said my legs look like a beer. A bear. And then her advice, she's like, like, well, you can shave them. Wow.

[Abby Biswell]

Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

That's so young.

[Abbey Howard]

I did shave my legs in second grade.

[Addy Howard]

Second grade.

[Abbey Howard]

I don't think it was something I kept up with. Sure. But they did get shaved.

[Addy Howard]

I mean, she was just giving you a solution to the problem.

[Abbey Howard]

I know.

[Addy Howard]

Maybe she was waiting for you to realize. She's like, her legs are hairy.

[Abbey Howard]

She was like, need to happen. Which I was. She got my. She had me regularly get eyebrow wax appointments. I think seventh or eighth grade.

[Abby Biswell]

Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

I. I think if you. I will be forthcoming with Vivian about things that she needs to take care of because they don't know it. And it's better to hear from your mom than your peers.

[Abbey Howard]

I guess that's true.

[Addy Howard]

I remember the first time I shaved my legs. My parents videotaped it on, like, the whole camera. And I was like, get out this Is so embarrassing. And they're like,

[Abbey Howard]

oh, my God, like the home recorder. Life with girls.

[Addy Howard]

I know. So much work, so funny.

[Abbey Howard]

Okay, so I actually. What does this say about me, guys? I really tried to think of a time that my. Here's the other thing. I will say I was a very obedient kid.

[Addy Howard]

Like, I don't.

[Abbey Howard]

My mom also didn't have strict rules with me. She didn't. So it was easy to, like, abide by them when they're. They weren't. I was like, internally, like, very motivated to never break a rule, like, ever as a kid. But I can think of a lot of things as an adult that my mom advised me against that I did not follow. And we can just leave it up in the air if. If I regret it or not. I don't. I don't regret these. I'm just gonna actually say she was actually wrong.

[Addy Howard]

So sorry. Sorry.

[Abbey Howard]

One of them being not to do social media. They.

[Addy Howard]

I remember. They were like, remember for a long time she wouldn't watch anything.

[Abby Biswell]

I.

[Abbey Howard]

It was actually just brought to my attention that this is what she does watch. She watches this podcast.

[Addy Howard]

Lauren, we love you.

[Abbey Howard]

I know she's tuning in because we're talking about moms.

[Addy Howard]

I don't blame her because that first year stuff was very coupley.

[Abbey Howard]

Remember it was like. Well, I don't remember at all. I feel like even as a parent now, I'm like, I would never want my kids to be vulnerable to the Internet. Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah. That's so scary.

[Abbey Howard]

And also, of course, the content we're making was very embarrassing. And that also is. We'll get to that later. But that's because of her. I wasn't embarrassed by it. Another thing that she advised me against was moving.

[Addy Howard]

Mm, To Hawaii.

[Abbey Howard]

Moving to Hawaii, moving to Arizona, all those things. But she did admit upon later, she's like, I advised you against that. Not because I didn't think you should do it. It's because I didn't want you to do it because I just didn't want you to be away from me.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah, that's sweet.

[Abbey Howard]

And I think I knew that when she was giving that advice, I was

[Addy Howard]

like, well, this is. Sorry, mom.

[Abbey Howard]

Best reasoning. Another one getting veneers. Getting veneers. She did not want that.

[Addy Howard]

Well, she just. You're naturally subject.

[Abbey Howard]

She was like, I just don't see what's wrong with your teeth. I'm like, no, there's nothing wrong with my teeth. Like. And I was like, but I just like the way that they look of Course. And she, you know, in your mom's eyes, her child is perfect.

[Abby Biswell]

Perfect.

[Abbey Howard]

And so she also never got me braces or anything. So I guess she really liked them, naturally.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah, totally.

[Abbey Howard]

So should I keep going on the list of things I didn't listen to my mom about?

[Addy Howard]

Yeah, do it.

[Abbey Howard]

Getting married young.

[Addy Howard]

I didn't listen to my mom on that one.

[Abbey Howard]

Didn't listen to my mom on that one. She did not want me to get married young.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

And we really had a lot of converse, serious conversations about. I'm glad we can talk about it now.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

But when it boiled down to it, in her head, she, like, loved Matt. Like, she. Actually, that was. I was very obedient. I listened to my mom. She literally, in high school, she's like, you can only date Matt Howard. We lived in different towns. Look, I freaking made it happen.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

Across state lines. And, like, I was very obedient. But then it was just in her head. It was the order. Things like, she's like, you graduate college, then you can get married.

[Addy Howard]

Right.

[Abbey Howard]

And we're like. We just kind of messed up that order a little bit.

[Addy Howard]

I think it's good that our moms are a voice of reason. Like, they're supposed to push back on our. Especially our spontaneous whimsy.

[Abbey Howard]

Especially if they're. If they're, like, kind of, like, not random, but, like, spontaneous or just, like, outside the normal. Like, it's like, okay, well, why do you want to do this? And so it was good that I had, like, I really had to think about, like, what is the purpose of marriage? Like, why do I want to marry Matt specifically? And, like, is this a good idea? Like, I really had to think about that a long time. So it was good that she pushed against that. Of course.

[Addy Howard]

We need that.

[Abbey Howard]

Another thing I didn't listen about getting a dog.

[Abby Biswell]

That's the next one I was gonna say for you.

[Addy Howard]

I was gonna. But do you regret that?

[Abbey Howard]

It's up in the air. Just kidding. I know. I love Pretzel dearly. She's a puppy, so she does puppy things in a hard stage. My mom is very gay, and she doesn't hold back at all.

[Addy Howard]

I think she would say she was right on that one. Maybe wrong on the others. Like, she would say, oh, yeah, you got married. Great.

[Abbey Howard]

Like, forming this. Forming this list. She was like, the thing you did not listen to that you should have, because she's like, I can see all those other things. Like, I can see how it worked out was the dog. She's getting trained right Now, I mean, like, she's a puppy. She's gonna do puppy things. Also, admittedly, we don't train her like she's getting trained, but, like, I'm like, at this point, that's just not a priority.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah, you do train her. You have the little. The little beep beeper.

[Abbey Howard]

We beep her. But we did lose that.

[Addy Howard]

Oh, hey, it was an attempt.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah, you tried really hard. So, yeah, no, I will also just say my mom is very, like, now she approves of all of those things, but those were all things that she pushed against. Well, actually, no, not the dog. I'm very much still against the dog.

[Addy Howard]

I have a whole list of things. I think it's good when we become adults, I think naturally there's going to be that time in our life once we go to college or turn 18 or do things where you have to make that switch of listening to everything your parents say, and it goes from an obedient relationship to a, hey, I'm actually going to make my own decisions now.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

And then it. Then it switches to, there's a little bit of tension in there. Like, I had tension with my mom a few years in there, too, and now it's switched from, hey, we're no longer, like, it's not a parent child. Now we're peers. And now it's more of a mentor relationship.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

And I think that naturally that switch has tension.

[Abbey Howard]

And that's why I will say these weren't like, disobedience. These were just, like, not following her advice.

[Addy Howard]

Right.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah. Like, I feel like getting. Choosing to get married was my first, like, adult decision. Yeah. Because I was so young. Like, I was like, this was my first then. Then at that point, man, I just had a heyday of making my own decisions. Clearly.

[Addy Howard]

You really did. You put your parents. You were like, oh, yeah, I'm getting married. And then I moved to Hawaii. Oh, yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

And we're doing social media, and Matt's

[Addy Howard]

dropping out of college.

[Abbey Howard]

They're like, what? Didn't push back against that one that much.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

I don't really know why. Maybe they did. And I just kind of forgot about it.

[Addy Howard]

I don't remember. It was just a lot of, like, big things at once.

[Abbey Howard]

It was a lot at once. I put my parents through a lot. Sorry, guys.

[Addy Howard]

Hey, it worked out.

[Abbey Howard]

It worked out.

[Addy Howard]

I think now that we've shared things that we didn't listen, maybe should have, or it worked out, maybe we can share some of the things that our moms did.

[Abbey Howard]

Great.

[Addy Howard]

And some great advice they poured into us.

[Abbey Howard]

Yes.

[Addy Howard]

And I honestly had a little bit of a hard time. I had to really sit down and think through this. And I talked to my sisters, too. Because when your parents shape and inform your internal dialogue and your thoughts and your life for so long, it's kind of hard to pinpoint, like, oh, these are the major things that my mom shared or taught me that have stuck with me. So I really wanted to think through some of them. I. I got some good ones. Was it hard for you, or is it kind of like. No, these are very obvious.

[Abbey Howard]

A lot, actually. Quickly, I was also having this discussion with my mom.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

Because I was also like. Like, you said, like, you're like, you did teach me this. Right. Like, I didn't come to this. I didn't arrive here on my own. Right. I guess the first one that I thought of that, like, my mom is always in my ear, because this is something that I still struggle with a lot. It's the primary focus of a lot of my therapy is I feel guilty a lot. Like, I just have, like, a guilty. Like, I feel like things are like. Like, I should have done some. I don't know. I feel guilty all the time. My mom, ever since I was a kid, she was like, well, did you do something wrong? I'm like, I guess. I guess it wasn't wrong. She's like, well, then don't feel guilty unless you did something wrong. This feels like such a basic thing that my mom, like, had to, like, really hounding on me. Like, just don't feel guilty unless you did something wrong. Like, if someone else is going through a hard time, I feel like in my brain, it's always trying to convince me that there was something that I didn't do to stop that from happening. And so, like, if anything was happening or, like, okay, say, for instance, like, I got a part. And I'm thinking about this, like, a lot. Like, I did theater as a kid. If I got a part that I knew someone else really wanted, like, instead of being happy that I got the part because I also wanted it, I also. This also prevented me from figuring out what I actually wanted because I, like, so badly, like, wanted to please. Please others. Yeah. And so, like, if I got the part, I'd be like, I'm not even, like, that happy, because I just feel so bad, because so and so I know they really wanted it, and they tried really, really hard. She's like, abby, did you do anything wrong? And I'm like, no, I tried my best. And she's like that's not wrong. Like don't feel guilty. So yeah, I feel like I, that's one that I like currently even like now that I'm 27, I still hear my mom's voice like literally in her voice. Like don't feel guilty unless you did something wrong.

[Addy Howard]

Your mom is a really level headed and a great voice of reason. So I can see her just. And she's really good at just sharing truth in a way that's just like wait, why is that even? You know, it's just, it's so matter of fact in a gracious way.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah. Like she.

[Addy Howard]

I feel like I could see your mom saying that in a way that doesn't make you feel dumb for feeling guilty but also is like, hey, that's just not true.

[Abbey Howard]

Like you don't need to.

[Addy Howard]

I think she balances the thing, those things really well in her.

[Abbey Howard]

I think that's very true.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah. So that, that's a really good one. My mom is extremely hardworking. If I think through the people in my life. And the most hardworking people I know, it's both of my parents and Caleb. Like I'm like, these are three of the most hard working people I know. She was one of 13. She has 13 siblings, which is crazy.

[Abby Biswell]

I didn't know that.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah, that's crazy. 1 of 13. And they just, they didn't, they didn't have any money growing up. And so all of her siblings really had to bootstrap themselves to. If they wanted to do something, they had to financially pay for it themselves starting at a young age. And so just her whole life she's really just grinded for the things that she wanted. Anytime that I would say I want to do blank or I wish I could do this, my mom would always just say, well, just do it. Why can't you do it? What's stopping you from doing it? Just go do it.

[Abbey Howard]

Even the way you just said it, I could see Ruth saying that, just do it, just do it.

[Addy Howard]

Just like, why are you talking about it? Just go do it. And I was talking to her about this and she actually was given that advice at her first job when she was 19 years old from a guy in the elevator at her office. And she's like, that always stuck with me and I wanted to teach that to you girls. And that has always been just my attitude life. Like, well, if I want to try something, I'm just going to try it. I'm just going to do it. Like there's not a question of if I Can. It's not a question if I can do it. It's just, will I or will I not?

[Abbey Howard]

That's good.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah. And I think that just gave me a level of confidence to try new things and always enabled me to, like, take risks. And I feel like we take a lot of. Caleb and I have taken a lot of risks together in our 20s, and I feel like my mom has really encouraged all those decisions. And, yeah, from a young age, that was instilled with me. I can do anything.

[Abbey Howard]

My parents did that, too. I always think about all the time. I tell Matt this story, my. Both my parents, but my dad, like, there's some specific memories. I think there's something too, about, like, a girl with their dad. Like, you're like, my dad's not gonna lie me to, like, my mom will make me feel good, but my dad's not gonna lie to me.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

I remember one day, I was like, dad, it's so crazy, but there has been a lot of presidents and none of them have been a girl. And he was like, well, you could be the first. And I was really like, okay, I could.

[Addy Howard]

I will be.

[Abbey Howard]

But that sounds like a lot of work.

[Addy Howard]

Oh, it won't be.

[Abbey Howard]

Like, I fully believe that. Like, and to this day, I fully believe that my dad thought I could. I don't know if that is actually what he's thinking or if he was, like, trying to instill confidence in me. And then it's same thing happened with baseball. I was like, dad, all these major league baseball players, none of them are girls. He's like, you could be the first. I was like, me, so not athletic. And I'm like, I could, but, gosh, I think I wanna do something else with my time.

[Addy Howard]

Yes.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah. And so I always think about that because I think humility is a really important characteristic to have.

[Addy Howard]

Of course.

[Abbey Howard]

But I was thinking about this more and more. Like, when it comes to kids, I'm like, that's not the role of the parent. Like, I feel like the world does enough to knock you on your knees and humble you.

[Addy Howard]

Right.

[Abbey Howard]

That I'm like, I just want to speak, like, confidence.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

Into my children. Yeah. Now, I do think you can cross a line with that.

[Addy Howard]

Right.

[Abbey Howard]

But I think you can gauge that. And I don't know. I'm like, my parents just really spoke a lot of confidence in me. They're like, yes, you can. Or they're like, why are you not the best? Like, you could be the best. Just be the best.

[Addy Howard]

Just do it. Like, just work hard. Yeah. Work really hard and you can do whatever you want.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah. I feel like I've take something with CJ recently. Like, if he says, I can't do it, Mama, I'm like, don't ever say you can't do it. You can ask for help, and that's what you should say. Don't ever say you can't do it, because you can, buddy. And if you need help, just say, I need help, because that's a good thing.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

But don't say you can't, because you can do anything. And that's just. I get that from my mom.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

And my dad, but my mom really spoke that a lot.

[Abbey Howard]

Okay. This next one's actually really good. And it's as it relates to boy advice. I think for a period of time there, my mom was probably like, what's going on with Abby? Because I was not like, very boy crazy. Like, I just. Okay, I always say that. And you guys always think I wasn't. My mom was like, you were not boy crazy. Ask her.

[Addy Howard]

No, I believe you weren't boy crazy, but the boys were crazy about you. Like, you always had a guy. I felt like that was, like, dying for your attention.

[Abby Biswell]

The stories I've heard. It's more than just Matt.

[Abbey Howard]

If I have painted that picture. If I have painted that picture, then that is just my ego. It is not the case.

[Addy Howard]

Who stayed at the hotel with you

[Abby Biswell]

guys in St. Louis?

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

I'm like, you've never had. You never said it in a prideful way. It's always so nonchalant that I'm like, what is she talking about?

[Abbey Howard]

I don't know.

[Abby Biswell]

You went on dates.

[Abbey Howard]

I did go on. Okay, so this is where it comes to my mom's first. My mom's advice. Okay, she might have phrased it differently, but in my head, I internalized it as like, no boy can take a reservation on you. Meaning, like. Okay, so this came into play specifically. I can think of an example. When it came to homecoming, I was like, mom, like, this guy is, like, literally actively driving to our house to ask me to homecoming because his friend told me. He's like, are you home? I know what's about to happen. But I was like, but I know so and so is planning. And they're gonna ask me. They already told me. They're gonna ask me to homecoming. And she's like, abby, no. No boy can take a reservation on you. Like, and so she's like, if they're gonna ask you, it's like, whoever asks you. And you want to go with them first? You. You take that. Like, no one gets to take a reservation. Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

They don't get to claim. Stake on your land.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah. And, like, hold you. Hold you. Literally, no one gets claim on my land.

[Addy Howard]

Sorry. This land is your land.

[Abbey Howard]

This land.

[Addy Howard]

That's my favorite flag song.

[Abby Biswell]

Are there other Flag songs?

[Abbey Howard]

Yes, there's a lot of them.

[Addy Howard]

Oh, sorry. Grand Old Flag is my favorite flag song.

[Abbey Howard]

Okay. Fun fact.

[Addy Howard]

All right. Derailed. Go back.

[Abbey Howard]

Anyway, she's great about it. No boy gets to take a reservation. And actually, this did come into play now. You guys are like, sorry, this did

[Abby Biswell]

come into play again.

[Abbey Howard]

It came into play a couple other times where she was like, the boys.

[Addy Howard]

A couple other times.

[Abbey Howard]

I know. She's like, no, they should.

[Addy Howard]

They were cute. You were so cute. Of course.

[Abbey Howard]

She's like, no one gets to take a reservation on you. And I do think that that can extend beyond, like, boys asking you to homecoming, but, like, basically meaning, like, you. You're free to make your own decisions for yourself in your best interest. And, like, I think this also, once you hear more about the other advice I needed from my mom, explains it, like, but they wanted to.

[Addy Howard]

And yeah, yeah, that's really good advice, especially if you're a people pleaser. It's like, hey, you don't. They don't get. They don't have the right to just take your answer.

[Abbey Howard]

She's like, abby, actually think for a minute, who do you want to go with? And I was like, well, I probably want to go with. Who is, like, gonna. She's like, this, like, the fact that she needed to sort through all that to just figure out what I actually wanted, so I would do that. And so, yeah, and then this advice also extended to, like, going on dates. Like, if a guy would ask me on a date, but I'm like, mom, I just don't know if I could, like, see my whole life with him. She's like, abby, whoa. She's like, it's not that serious. Like, it's not. It's fun. And if you. If you think you'd have a fun time with him, you don't have to think about if you even want him to be your boyfriend. Like, just say yes. If you think it would be fun to go with him, give him a shot. And she's like. She's like, I think he's a really nice, kind guy. And if he's with, like, if he's asking you on a date, like, you can just say yes. And it can be that Simple. So, yeah, that was my mom's, like, boy advice.

[Addy Howard]

That's really good advice. Really good advice.

[Abbey Howard]

No reservations on me. Yeah, we don't take reservations here.

[Addy Howard]

That's good. I'm gonna. I'm gonna use that someday. That's really good. My mom's was also similar, kind of playing off with the first. My mom was really big on fake it until you make it it. And she would always tell us, if you walk into a room and you feel insecure, put your shoulders back, remember that you are a eulit girl. Put your chin in the air, and walk around like you're don't stink. Okay? And she meant it. And she's like, if you. You just have to go in there, walk into rooms where you feel scared, and just pretend like you're not. She's like, you don't have to be perfect at this or whatever. Like, you will figure it out along the way. And I just feel like that I've really. That has stuck with me a lot. And there are a lot of things that, like, I'll do or start that I. I am nervous about or feel insecure about. But as you start doing them and the more time you're in those spaces, you get better and you learn more. And so it's like, if you never even took the step to enter whatever it is. Like, I'll just use the podcast, for example. I was nervous to start the podcast, and it's like, if I never started it, I was too scared or wanted to be perfect off the jump. Like, then you just don't even have the opportunity to grow and learn. And so you just kind of have to pretend like you're a professional until you become a professional. And I think sometimes people ask, like, how are you confident? Like, I'm not always confident. I just pretend like I'm confident and I just gaslight myself. And it's a great way to live your life.

[Abbey Howard]

Your mom was meant to raise girls. I feel like, yeah, like, strong women.

[Addy Howard]

Yes.

[Abbey Howard]

And she did.

[Addy Howard]

She totally did. It's so interesting. My parents balance, because my mom is really, like. I would describe her as strong, loyal. Really, like, stand up for yourself. Very that. And then my dad is more of the sensitive, like, talker, so they have a good balance there. But it's funny that my mom isn't, like, the sensitive one.

[Abbey Howard]

Your mom's confidence is contagious. Like, I feel like when I'm around her, I feel like I'm like, there's no place for fear.

[Addy Howard]

Like, no, she's a very Uplifting person to be around.

[Abbey Howard]

Yes. Seriously, this one's kind of twofold, because we did. I'm kind of combining two into one that I could easily separate and make them two separate things. But I think about my parents a lot when it comes to careers. So my parents. This is one of those things my parents taught us to do kind of differently than, like, how they did. And I want to be careful because I don't want to, like, speak on their life story, but they're always like, do what you love. Like, it does not matter if it is, like, not practical. Like, they weren't really, like, the practical. Actually, in the book I'm reading, the girl wants to be an actress and her dad is like, it's not practical. And that was never. My parents both had very practical jobs and. But that they would never gave me that advice. Yeah, they were like, I remember being like, but guys like, this doesn't feel very realistic because I wanted to do acting as well. And they were like, I'm like, but it doesn't really feel that realistic. And they're like, who? Someone has to have the part. Someone has to. Someone gets to do that. It's whoever's gonna work hard and try and actually take that risk. And so, like, that should be you. And so they always pushed me to, like, follow my passions and to, I guess, not be afraid of taking, like a non conventional route. Which is honestly so ironic that this is like, now where I'm at, because it's like, even though my mom wasn't necessarily encouraging social media, she did always encourage me to follow, like, my passions and like, to be like, non conventional, but ultimately to not worry what other people think.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

And they. When I was talking to my mom about this episode, I was like, what were the things that you, like, really, really intentionally taught me? And I was like, because like you said, it's hard to piece apart, like, what came from your mom. And you're like, I just have that. It's like, actually, no, your parent was like the voice speaking this into you this whole. Your whole childhood. And she's like, I feel like the thing I focused on the most was not to worry what other people think. And it was really sweet because she's like, I couldn't really figure it out myself. But that one certainly worked on you, which was really sweet. But, yeah. So I guess, like, arriving at a career decision and like, not worrying about if it's conventional or if it's necessarily realistic or what other people are gonna think, because I do think a Lot of people that go into acting, modeling, any start a business, social media. Like, there can be a lot of fears of like, oh my gosh, like, what if someone sees this and like, it is super cringy and they're like, embarrassed by it? I guess in my head I was just kind of like, whatever. Like, I don't know, it doesn't matter. I shouldn't say that I never, like, got embarrassed about it, but I just feel like my parents really just instilled this, like, I don't know, disregard for other people's opinions, which was something that I think they had to do because it was like I was not naturally that way.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

I fully believe that. I did not just like, come this way. Like, they were. I was like, like I said especially like from a young age, people pleasing, like, super concerned about like, like everyone else and like what they were thinking or if they approved of what I was doing. And so they really worked against that. And especially my mom.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah. And that's amazing. Yeah. I hope that for my kids, it's like you want. There's such a freedom in your life when you arrive to that point where it's like, the opinions of others don't affect my life.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abby Biswell]

Like, I can tell that's something your parents did because Blake's the same way where he's like, I don't care about other people's opinions. He doesn't need them or he doesn't need other people's validation on. On who he is. And so that definitely comes from your parents instilling that in both of you.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah. Like, they. You were very safe in your identity with them. Like, you knew who you were based off what they said about you. And it's like, okay, then I know that's true. So I think that's amazing. Amazing.

[Abbey Howard]

Amazing.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

I gotta give them that credit.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah. That's awesome. The last one for my mom that I was thinking through, and this isn't necessarily something she told me, it's just what she showed me in her life. My mom is incredibly servant hearted towards her family. Like, she sees a need and she fills it. And it's honestly insane to me. Just like the way I watch her days. She just moves from thing to thing. She's got like the little energizer bunny. Like, she has so much energy. She never complains. She never expects anything back in return. She just gives and gives and gives and gives and gives to her, her daughters and her husband. And I'm like, dang, my mom is an incredible Example of just like a really servant hearted, loving mom who has just loved being a mom, loves being a wife, like, loves her family so well and even just like the smallest things, I'll be out of toll paper towels. She'll come the next day and she'll bring me paper towels. You know, it's just like really small things. She sees a need and she fills it and it's something I deeply, deeply admire in my mom. And like I really want to.

[Abbey Howard]

Sorry.

[Addy Howard]

I don't want to get emotional talking about it, but. Yeah,

[Abbey Howard]

that's sweet. Hey, you can cry here. Oh, Abby, you have a good mom.

[Addy Howard]

I'm the best mom.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah. I just think too like when it comes to her being a grandma, it's so sweet. Yeah. And I remember right after I gave birth to cj, Caleb, you know, we were in the hospital for quite a few days after he was born. And so Caleb didn't have any time off of work. And it was the day we got out of the hospital and he had to go and work four hours. He worked 40 hours in three days, like right after C.J. was born. And I remember sitting there like, oh my gosh, we have a baby. I have no idea what I'm doing. And my mom came and she was just like, abby, let him work. Just go. Let him catch up on that. I'm here, I'm here, I got you. And like let him catch up so that when I'm gone, like he can help you. And just like the way that she always steps in is so amazing. And I know you're getting emotional, Addy, because your mom is the same way. And it's just so. Especially when these moments when you really need your mom and they show up, you're just like, oh, I'm so blessed. I love you. So it's just. Yeah. I admire that in her and I hope I can be like that towards CJ and Vivian and their families someday too. That's her legacy that I want to pass on to my kids.

[Abby Biswell]

It's sweet. Just like seeing how much my mom is trying to figure out and my parents are trying to figure out like financially how she can quit her job so that she can just be here and like take care of Brielle, which is like the most like selfless thing to want to do that for us. And she's been here for three days and she's just so sweet watching her just light up.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah, it's the best. Yeah, same.

[Abby Biswell]

And Lori's great too.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

Seriously?

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abby Biswell]

Honey. Sorry, honey.

[Abbey Howard]

She's the best, honey.

[Abby Biswell]

She's. She's the best.

[Abbey Howard]

Seriously? Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

Was there anything, Addie, that you wanted to share? Something that you learned from your mom?

[Abby Biswell]

I was trying to think of things while you guys were talking. I was thinking, like, my parents and my mom really set me up for success financially and teaching us how to use our money, save our money, give our money, and that set us up for success.

[Addy Howard]

It's huge.

[Abby Biswell]

It really has. Just. Just instilling that from us from a young age and unconditional love. I think that's like, a normal thing. But I think she showed that very, very selflessly growing up. And I knew that I could go to her about anything. I also think you were mentioning this, too, not having that strict of rules. Yes, there were expectations, and I think that was the thing is there were expectations of me, but there weren't necessarily strict rules around me. And I think that, again, also set me up for success growing up. I know they expected me to be home by a certain time, or they expect me to do. Be a good kid and to do things, but they weren't like, you have to be at home by midnight or you're grounded. And there's these consequences and these things that happen. It's like, we expect you to be at home because that's what we tell you. And I always knew, okay, cool. That's fine with me. And listening to them in those ways was. Was really helpful.

[Abbey Howard]

I love that you bring that up because, like, I think my parents also had that style of parenting, and I kind of, like, was. Have been thinking about, obviously, parenting all the time now with my kids coming from not super strict parents. It instilled confidence in me because in a way, I felt like I was, like, kind of setting the expectation for myself, even though underhandedly, like, they had laid this foundation of what was acceptable and what was not acceptable. But in my head, it was still, like, it wasn't as black and white. So I felt like I had the confidence then to, like, navigate things that weren't black and white and that relational aspect of parenting. Whereas, like, if it's super strict and black and white, then you just don't want to approach your parents.

[Abby Biswell]

Oh, yeah. I would text them all the time and be like, hey, I'm kind of. I'm running a little late on curfew. I'll be home in 15 minutes, or can I leave in 15 minutes instead of being home in 15 minutes? And they'd be like, yeah, sure. Like, it was just a communication and, like, a Trust that I think my parents had to build in me.

[Abbey Howard]

Like, I didn't need to speed home.

[Abby Biswell]

No. And they. And they wouldn't want that either. They wanted me to be safe and get home quickly. I think the other thing is the confidence building, and I don't know how they instilled that in me. I think that's something that I've realized is maybe different about me. This is so superficial, but I'm like, I don't really wear makeup that often. Like, really only when I'm going out somewhere and I think. And I don't really get my hair done. I don't get dressed during the day. Like, I'm really confident in my natural self. And I think my. My mom just. She never expected anything different from me. And I think she always told me how beautiful I was, just the way I was. And then not quitting. If I would have quit dance that first time I was there, I wanted to quit at semester, and she didn't let me, and I danced the rest of my life. And so I think that's something too. But, yeah, those are my quick things.

[Abbey Howard]

Those are great.

[Addy Howard]

Those are good.

[Abbey Howard]

Your mom is also, like. When I think about your mom, she's very, like. Like good with verbal affirmation. I feel like she is.

[Abby Biswell]

And that is something we go back and forth with because I don't necessarily want it, really. So she's really sentimental.

[Abbey Howard]

You're very, like. You're a very kind person. But, like, it's like your mom is so verbally affirming. And I was like, wow, that's.

[Abby Biswell]

She is. And I think that actually played a big role in who I am espoused, even though I didn't necessarily need it, But I did, clearly. But I'm not a verbal affirmations person. I don't know what I am. I think I do like it, but sometimes I'm like, it's cheesy, but it's like this morning, Pharrell was crying, and I picked her up. She goes, she loves her mommy. I'm like, of course she has mom. Like, duh.

[Addy Howard]

But she's like, so that's weird.

[Abby Biswell]

I'm like, yeah, she does.

[Addy Howard]

So funny.

[Abby Biswell]

I'm so straightforward. I'm a lot like my dad, which is funny. And so. So my mom is very good with verbal affirmations and making sure she loves all of her children no matter what. And I think that has shown me a lot. We've been through a lot as a family, and my mom has shown up for every single one of us kids in so many ways that I think is so admirable. Even though sometimes she's like, why do one of my kids want kids or only want two? She has four. She's like, you guys only want two kids or no kids?

[Addy Howard]

And I'm like.

[Abby Biswell]

She's like, what did I do wrong? I'm like, nothing. You did great. So, yeah, she is very good with the verbal.

[Addy Howard]

Well, I'm glad we got to shout out our mom.

[Abbey Howard]

Yes. I also.

[Addy Howard]

They all watch podcast. Hope you guys are all crying.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah, Crying. We made this because we found out that all of our moms listen to this podcast.

[Addy Howard]

So they actually made us do it. No, actually made us do it. Ruth.

[Abby Biswell]

Ruth hopped on our call, and I said, let's make it about the mom.

[Addy Howard]

No, literally.

[Abby Biswell]

Oh, that was great.

[Abbey Howard]

We also also want to shout out some of your moms because we pulled you guys and asked some of the good lessons you learned from your mom, and you came up with some really good ones to share. So we're gonna shout out a couple of them. Mara said her mom said to always shower before getting in bed.

[Addy Howard]

I second that. That's a great. That's a good one.

[Abbey Howard]

I never understood morning showers.

[Addy Howard]

I didn't either. That seems a little crazy. I don't know how to say her name. Vivi. We'll just say that her mom would say, you are who you hang around with. And ain't that true?

[Abbey Howard]

That is.

[Addy Howard]

That's a great one. It's so true.

[Abbey Howard]

My mom always said, this comes from Liv. If you don't ask, the answer is always no. Now I always ask.

[Addy Howard]

I love people that just ask out of pocket things. Not like. Like, you just go to the store. It's like, hey, can I have a discount on that? I'm like, at least they asked. You know what I mean? I'm like, I'm just so.

[Abbey Howard]

Oh, that makes me itchy.

[Addy Howard]

It makes me itchy, too. But when people do it, I'm like,

[Abbey Howard]

that is Lori Biswell.

[Abby Biswell]

Also, Lori will ask for. She asked.

[Addy Howard]

My mom asked for things. And I'm like, oh, my gosh. And then usually she gets it. Like, I should just start asking for things.

[Abbey Howard]

I'm like, mom, no, no, no.

[Addy Howard]

Please don't. Please just keep it simple. It is how it is.

[Abbey Howard]

Keep it simple.

[Addy Howard]

Sammy said, juice oranges. Oh, sorry. Juice oranges, carrots, and ginger together and drink to help with acne and make your skin glow. That sounds so good. I love ginger oranges, carrots, and ginger.

[Abbey Howard]

Okay.

[Addy Howard]

I mean, I'd sound Delicious.

[Abbey Howard]

If anything, it's healthy.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah. And we love that.

[Abbey Howard]

Grazy says, always have a list and eat before you go grocery shopping. Save so much money.

[Addy Howard]

Eat before you go grocery shopping is so real.

[Abbey Howard]

That is a good. That is good advice.

[Addy Howard]

I love it. Ellie said that nothing good happens past 11pm my dad would always say that. He's like, nothing good happens after midnight. I know it is a little ominous. And then anytime it's past midnight, I'm like, I gotta get home. Only bad things are gonna happen.

[Abbey Howard]

I gotta get home.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

Like, what did you do?

[Addy Howard]

It's, like, superstitious. I was like, oh, thank you.

[Abbey Howard]

Things are gonna.

[Addy Howard]

I ruined it. I'm out past midnight.

[Abbey Howard]

I feel like we ought to also shout out, like, I know that, like, we have really put a lot of praise on our moms, but not everyone gets to have, like, a good mom. You know, like, there's. That's unfortunate, but that's the case. But I just want to encourage those of you that if you're like, man, dang it, like, what am I to do? Like, I'm just out in the world alone. I don't have. Or maybe you've. Your mom is not around anymore, or there's particular life circumstances that just make your relationship with your mom a little bit more challenging or difficult or distant. And I just want to say that you have the power. I fully believe this. To change your family down the future. And, like, I just have seen that even in my own family, like, if you look generations back, like, the example wasn't always there. And this is something that, like, people had to intentionally do, like, my mom and my grandma's had to intentionally, intentionally do to change that for our family so things could be different and for my relationship with my mom and my mom's relationship with her mom. So I just want to say that you have the power to. To change that.

[Addy Howard]

Yes.

[Abbey Howard]

And to start a new trend.

[Addy Howard]

Yes. Yes.

[Abbey Howard]

Fully believe that.

[Addy Howard]

So encouraging and hopeful. Well, we come to the part where we're talking about always eating. Oh, what are we making? What are we making for dinner?

[Abbey Howard]

I found a new recipe this week, actually. Yeah. I'm linking it for you guys. It's a sheet pan meal. Because who doesn't love a good sheet pan meal? Just no more dishes. I'm sick of it.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

And this one is sheet pan gnocchi with brussels sprouts and sausage. I'm gonna say a couple things. It feels like a pesto. You put pesto on top of it at the end.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

This recipe is actually very big, and I feel like you can swap a lot of things out. It feels kind of fall, like, because I feel like I think about brussels sprouts and butternut squashes in it. It feels like kind of fall, like it's good any time of year. It kind of has some interesting flavors. I swapped out the Italian sausage for chicken sausage. I love an apple chicken sausage. Yeah. You just chop it all up, throw it in the oven, and then you can top it with the recipe says burrata. I just use those, like, fresh mozzarella pearls and a little pesto. Yum. And everyone ate it.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

Which was a win, I shouldn't say. I'm not sure how much my kids ate. Me and Matt loved it, and I made it for a friend too.

[Addy Howard]

Every adult liked it.

[Abbey Howard]

Every adult ate it. I don't know if your kids are eating Brussels sprouts. How you doing that?

[Addy Howard]

Right, right, right.

[Abbey Howard]

I mean, I could probably get them to eat one if I gave them candy afterwards.

[Addy Howard]

This was the first week ever that CJ didn't get separate dinners made. He ate all of our meals this week.

[Abbey Howard]

I know.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah. He ate broccoli.

[Abbey Howard]

My kids ate broccoli.

[Addy Howard]

He said, I like it. I know. Like, we're turning a corner.

[Abbey Howard]

I know.

[Addy Howard]

It's the best.

[Abby Biswell]

That was funny. That reminds me of this weekend when your oldest didn't want to eat his breakfast casserole, and then he took a bite. You go, I like it. I like it.

[Abbey Howard]

I like it. I ate it all. It took him a while to take that first one. I'm like, I know you like this food. I'm just gonna. Just gonna stick it out.

[Addy Howard]

Yes. So true. But my recipe is from Ambitious kitchen. It's the mom's slow cooker beef stew. Her recipes are so good. I have not made a bad, ambitious kitchen recipe. All of her soups are amazing. And she. I once made an entire ambitious kitchen Thanksgiving when we had Covid and Caleb, and I didn't go home for Thanksgiving. I made all of her recipes.

[Abbey Howard]

Wow.

[Addy Howard]

It was incredible. Everything was so good. So this is like, you make it in the slow cooker, which is nice. You just sear your beef, throw it in there, and then it's just a flavor bomb of seasonings. It's red wine, balsamic vinegar, herbs. It's. It is so good. And it kind of gets thick at the end. You put in a little flour and peas at the end, and then let it kind of simmer, and it gets really thick and nice, and it's just oh, it is a comfort meal and healthy and good and hearty, and it is. Everyone will love it.

[Abbey Howard]

And slow cooker bonus.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah. You can make it in the morning.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah. People that go to work, you can

[Addy Howard]

just throw it in the cooker so it hits every time. Ask, ask, ask.

[Abbey Howard]

Abby, do you have a couple voicemails?

[Abby Biswell]

Yeah, let's kick it off with a food related one.

[Addy Howard]

Oh, hi. I just had to recall because my

[Abbey Howard]

toddler hung up on. I just wanted to call and say

[Addy Howard]

that I took you your advice on, like, skipping lunchtime for toddlers and treating

[Abbey Howard]

it more like just snacks and letting

[Addy Howard]

them just kind of snack throughout the early afternoon. And I just want to say that has been a game changer. Like, no more fighting with having them eat or not eat or my one year old throwing food on the floor. None of that. And now they actually eat. So I just wanted to say that I appreciate that and that has been, like, some of the best advice I've ever gotten. So thanks. Love you guys. Oh, my gosh.

[Abbey Howard]

That makes me feel so good because actually, when she said she followed my advice, I was like, oh, oh, no.

[Addy Howard]

Oh, no, they listen. Oh, no, they listen.

[Abbey Howard]

I don't know where that's gonna go. Oh, man. Yeah. Don't feed your daughter's lunch.

[Addy Howard]

That's. That's. That's so fun to hear that. That's.

[Abbey Howard]

I'm glad it's working for you too.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

Because, God, gosh, I can't go back anymore.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah, thanks for sharing too. That. That was like, you tried it and it was good. That's music to ears, seriously. Hi, Abby's, this is Brooke, and I was just wondering if you guys have

[Abbey Howard]

any books that you've read that have really impacted the way that you parent.

[Addy Howard]

Thank you. The Bible. I honestly haven't read any books.

[Abby Biswell]

I feel like we could also add in, like, or if there's like, influencers you follow or different. Get online content people too. That would help.

[Addy Howard]

I honestly, when it comes to parenting stuff, I'm really careful about what I listen to online because there are so many opinions online and every kid is so different. So I feel like it's okay to take some little nuggets here and little nuggets there. But honestly, it's the same thing with me where I'm like, it's just overwhelming sometimes to intake everything. And parenting is just not one of those things that's proven like, this works and this doesn't because, again, every kid's so different. I've honestly, like, I talk to a Lot of people in my life, I talk to my mom. I talk to you guys. I have my mentor, Kim. She's older, and she has three kids that she's. I really respect the way that she's parenting her kids. And I just feel like I'm taking advice from the people in my life. I enjoy their children and, like, adult children, too. So that has almost been more beneficial to me than necessarily, like, books and stuff. There is one book, it's called Shepherding your child's heart, which not everything in that book I do or agree with. But there's one thing that really stuck out to me, and I think about it a lot when it comes to discipline, it's that I don't always want to go for control. Like, I don't want to go for control or just behavior control. I want to try to get to the heart problem. So, like, what is the root of this behavior? Not just trying to, like, snuff out the behavior. And so I try to think about that a lot. Like, if, you know, my oldest isn't listening very well, I'm like, well, why isn't he listening? Do I. Am I. Am I getting upset because he's not.

[Abbey Howard]

Not.

[Addy Howard]

I'm not able to, like, control him right now, or am I just upset because this is actually, like, a bad character trait that I want to talk to him about and, like, point him in a better direction. Direction. So I feel like those are the things that has, like, stuck out to me when I think about parenting stuff, but I don't know, navigating it day by day.

[Abbey Howard]

I totally agree. Yeah, like, I think parenting advice is probably best done through relationship, if possible. I know that in college, Matt and I nannied for a family together that we, like, adored their children and still do. And I remember just, like, picking her brain all the time, like, why do you do this? Or how do they do this? They're so young, yet they speak like adults. But they're so fun and bold and they take things on. Like, I just remember just picking her brain. Shout out Sarah Downey. Honestly, like, she's amazing. And I still talk to her sometimes. And so, yes, obviously, like, looking for people that you're like, okay, their kids are pretty awesome kids. Like, how did you do that? Like, let's reverse engineer that. And then also, if I did have to pick a book, I can't claim that I've read the entire book. I have not finished it. But a really popular book was Hunt, Gather Parent, and there's a line from it that I think about a lot because it redirects me a lot in my day. And it's, kids don't want to be distracted, they want to be included. Or kids don't need to be distracted. They need to be included. And so I think about that a lot. Especially, like, when I'm like, okay, I'm, like, cleaning something or cooking something, and it'd be really easy to try to set them up with something and get them out of my hair. But there's so much to be learned from them, like going through those motions with me and, like, making a meal with me or, you know, like, being a part of cleaning something up. And I see that teaches them a lot of independence too. Hunt gathered parent. I cannot claim to have read that entire book, nor do I probably recommend the entire thing.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah, I didn't read all shepherd, your child's heart. I think I read, like, the first two chapters. Like, that stuck with me. I don't need anymore.

[Abbey Howard]

Got it.

[Addy Howard]

Like, get to the heart. Hi, Abby's. I love listening to you guys when

[Abbey Howard]

I'm doing my mom chores.

[Addy Howard]

So thank you for making those a lot more fun.

[Abbey Howard]

I would love to know how you

[Addy Howard]

guys named your kids and if there are any stories behind your kids names. Thank you.

[Abbey Howard]

That's sweet. It's such an honor to be included in, like, your daily life like that. Like, when I just hear about, like, your mom chores, like, so sweet. I know.

[Addy Howard]

Okay, so cj, his name is Caleb John. Caleb is obviously my husband, and then both grandpas are John, so that was really fun. And we had a really hard time thinking of a boy name. And it just came to me at night. I said we should just name him Caleb John and calm C.J. because that's, like, the three most important men in his life. So if we have another son, I have no idea what direction we'll go. And then Vivian. I've loved that name since I was a little girl. Like, I have a journal. I used to want to be a fashion designer, and I have a journal where my. I was my design book, and my designer name was Vivian Vincenne. I have a whole page of logos and, yeah, just so silly. But I've just always loved that name, and it's always stuck with me. And, yeah, I just always knew that's gonna be my daughter's name

[Abbey Howard]

for my kids. Griffin. I just liked that name.

[Addy Howard]

That's about it.

[Abbey Howard]

Good story. But his middle name is Douglas, which is a family name, which we had lost my grandpa the year before he was born. And so they share the same middle name. And then same with August. I actually. That was a name I loved since childhood. I read the book wonder when I was a kid.

[Addy Howard]

Is that he gets deformity.

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah.

[Addy Howard]

Is there a movie about it?

[Abbey Howard]

Yeah, there's a movie now.

[Abby Biswell]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

But it's been a book. It was a book for a while.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

He. His name was. His name was Augie. And I was like, I love the name Augie. And I was like, well, I guess I can only use it if I have a boy born in August. Which actually a lot of people when we named August August, they were like, I would only name my son August if he wasn't born in August.

[Addy Howard]

And I was like, everyone's so different.

[Abbey Howard]

Okay. And so I always said, I was like, if we ever have a boy born in August, then we got our name already. And then I was like, but what are the odds of that? And then his due date was the 15th, so I was like, odds are happening.

[Addy Howard]

It's happening.

[Abbey Howard]

And so I was excited about that. And then he is named after Matt's grandpa for their middle name. They share a middle name. Obvious. Jacob.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah.

[Abbey Howard]

And so both of our kids have like significant family middle names, but then just names that we like for the first names.

[Abby Biswell]

That's how we are too. Brielle. We knew we wanted a B name. We like the double Bs for Brielle Biswell, and we just like the name Brielle. That's the only, like, B name we liked for a girl. So if we have another girl, we're gonna have to find another B name we like. But her middle name's Lee, after Terry Blake's grandpa. And then my mom's middle name is also Lee, so it kind of worked for both as well.

[Addy Howard]

Oh, that's cool. I didn't know that.

[Abby Biswell]

Yeah, hers is spelled L, E A. But you.

[Addy Howard]

Same name.

[Abby Biswell]

You usually ask how to spell it.

[Addy Howard]

Right, right, right. That's awesome.

[Abbey Howard]

Thanks again to all of you that have called in and left voicemails. It's. It's probably my favorite part of filming this. Honestly, it's like such a sweet way to end off the episodes and a way to connect with you guys and we just appreciate your engagement. If you also want to call, the Phone number is 602-456-9690.

[Addy Howard]

And I think it's always fun reading your guys reviews. So thank you guys so much for leaving those. If you guys want to leave a review on all your episodes or all your podcast listening platforms, that would be so Greatly appreciated and this review is from Abby. Great name from a fellow Abby. Hello. I could simply not continue running while listening to your latest episode. I was on mile nine of my run and the part about your little guy tumbling down. Sorry, the part about your little guy tumbling down the slide and shooting your son with the Nerf gun came on. And when I say I was wheezing from laughter, tears were in my eyes. I have a two and a half year old taller boy and just couldn't relate more. I love your show and the pure entertainment. It brings a breath of fresh air from the gossip all over the Internet today. Thank you for joining me on my runs and helping me feel strong as I train for my half marathon next month. Six months postpartum. We should be friends. I feel like we have so many things in common. Seriously, thank you so much for leaving that review and glad we could entertain you.

[Abbey Howard]

Gosh, thank you guys so much. Wow. I think that wraps up today's episode.

[Addy Howard]

Yeah. Thank you guys for listening and remember, we're always here. Close your eyes, exhale. Feel your body relax and let go

[Abbey Howard]

of whatever you're carrying today.

[Addy Howard]

Well, I'm letting go of the worry that I wouldn't get my new contacts in time for this class. I got them to delivered free from 1-800-contacts.

[Abby Biswell]

Oh my gosh, they're so fast.

[Abbey Howard]

And breathe. Oh sorry.

[Addy Howard]

I almost couldn't breathe when I saw

[Abbey Howard]

the discount they gave me on my first order.

[Addy Howard]

Oh sorry. Namaste. Visit 1-800-contacts.com today to save on your first order. 1-800-contacts. Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile. I don't know if you knew this, but anyone can get the same Premium Wireless for $15 a month plan that I've been enjoying. It's not just for celebrities so. So do like I did and have one of your assistant's assistants switch you to Mint Mobile today. I'm told it's super easy to [e-mail] Switch upfront payment of $45 for 3 month plan equivalent to $15 per month required intro rate first 3 months only, then full price plan options available, taxes and fees, extra fee, full [e-mail].