Podcast Summary: Andrew Schulz's Flagrant with Akaash Singh
Episode: Your Girlfriend Secretly Hates You, Here’s Why
Release Date: February 19, 2025
Andrew Schulz's Flagrant with Akaash Singh tackles the often unspoken frustrations men face in modern relationships. In this candid and humorous episode, hosts Andrew Schulz and Akaash Singh, along with their co-hosts Mark Gagnon, Kiana, Tanya, Dove, and Eddie, delve deep into the dynamics of effort, expectations, and resentment between men and women.
1. The Valentine's Day Revelation
Andrew opens the discussion by referencing a viral Instagram post that garnered 12 million views, highlighting widespread frustrations women have towards men in general.
Andrew Schulz [00:00]:
"It turns out women aren't that happy with us. And by us, I don't just mean Alex, Mark, Akaash, and Andrew. I mean just men in general."
2. Effort in Relationships: Expectations vs. Reality
The conversation shifts to the concept of effort in romantic relationships. The hosts discuss scenarios where men are expected to go above and beyond simple gestures, such as cooking versus ordering food.
Akash Singh [00:36]:
"Because if your girl orders food for you or cooks food for you. Yeah. Which one means more?"
Andrew Schulz [02:03]:
"The effort is there. But even this time around, same thing happened. I do feel like there are some relationships where... they don't want us. They just hate being alone."
3. The Fear of Being Alone
A significant portion of the episode explores the idea that women's fear of loneliness drives them to stay in relationships they might not genuinely enjoy. This fear manifests as resentment towards their partners for simply keeping them from solitude.
Mark Gagnon [03:18]:
"Those are just the lonely ones celebrating Galentine's Day."
Andrew Schulz [06:53]:
"Women got the right to vote because there was one Tanya woman... I think that's why we're trying to figure out love."
4. Chivalry and Baseline Expectations
The hosts critique the modern interpretation of chivalry, arguing that what was once seen as thoughtful effort has become a baseline expectation. This shift has led to men feeling they must perform "extra" actions to keep their partners happy, often leading to frustration when efforts aren't reciprocated.
Andrew Schulz [72:16]:
"The expectation is that we all suck, right? You're gonna hate us anyway."
Dove [73:20]:
"Like, if a gross guy hits on you in the grocery store, it's like, get away from me."
5. Communication and Mind Reading
A recurring theme is the lack of clear communication regarding expectations in relationships. The hosts emphasize that men often feel blamed for not meeting unspoken standards, leading to unnecessary resentment.
Andrew Schulz [76:19]:
"You guys need to write it down. We need the expectations."
6. The Role of Modern Dating Apps
The discussion touches upon how dating apps have exacerbated superficial judgments, making it harder for genuine connections to form. The abundance of choices leads to overanalyzing potential partners, often resulting in dismissing them for minor flaws.
Kiana [57:50]:
"I see that. Tanya. Supporting P. I knew you were you're Jewess."
7. Navigating Modern Relationships
The hosts conclude by suggesting that both men and women need to set clear expectations and communicate more effectively to avoid unnecessary resentment. They advocate for understanding each other's baseline needs and not expecting excessive effort beyond natural partnership.
Andrew Schulz [78:03]:
"Listen, listen, listen. But your baseline isn't based on us like you said earlier. It's based on your mom."
Tanya [78:40]:
"Men are easy. It's like they want the most basic primal things in life... they want constant love and affection and attention."
Conclusion
In this episode, Flagrant offers a raw and humorous exploration of the complexities in modern relationships, highlighting the disconnect between perceived effort and actual expectations. The hosts advocate for better communication and realistic expectations to foster healthier and more fulfilling partnerships.
Notable Quotes:
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Andrew Schulz [00:00]:
"It turns out women aren't that happy with us... just men in general." -
Dove [61:57]:
"But that is a fair law." -
Andrew Schulz [78:03]:
"You guys need to write it down. We need the expectations."
This episode serves as a thought-provoking commentary on contemporary dating norms, urging listeners to reflect on their own relationships and communication styles.
