Fancy Feast w/ Kevin Ryan & H. Foley

Summary

Podcast Summary: "Fancy Feast" Episode of Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast

Episode Details

• Title: Fancy Feast
• Hosts: Kevin Ryan & H. Foley
• Release Date: June 2, 2025

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1. Tour Announcements and Updates

The episode kicks off with hosts Kevin Ryan and H. Foley enthusiastically announcing their ongoing "Back on the Block" tour. Kevin lists numerous cities where tickets are still available, emphasizing affordability and encouraging listeners to grab their spots.

Notable Quote:

Kevin Ryan [00:12]: "Oh, baby. This summer we're going to be Atlantic City. Then second show added in San Francisco, Portland, Oregon, Seattle, Brea, California, Burlington, Vermont, Boston. Tickets low tickets low."

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2. Show Rankings and Support

Kevin proudly shares the podcast's success, highlighting their position in the top 100 comedy charts and celebrating their growing Patreon community. They acknowledge their supporters across various platforms, including Spotify and YouTube.

Notable Quotes:

Kevin Ryan [02:08]: "The charts and we're in the top 100 on comedy. Pretty good."

Kevin Ryan [02:16]: "With 14,000 patrons, army of garbage is strong."

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3. Nostalgia and Personal Stories

A significant portion of the episode delves into the hosts' nostalgic recollections of their youth. They reminisce about summer experiences on the boardwalk, interactions with family, and humorous anecdotes from their childhood.

Notable Quotes:

H. Foley [03:18]: "Little childish if you ask me."

Kevin Ryan [03:31]: "I remember being out on the boardwalk till like midnight when I shouldn't have been."

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4. Culinary Critiques: Fancy Feast Segment

The hosts engage in a humorous critique of a high-end rotisserie chicken presentation at a French Michelin-star restaurant. They dissect the appearance and preparation methods, expressing strong aversions to the unconventional presentation.

Notable Quotes:

Kevin Ryan [05:20]: "I ain't eating your black-legged bird. That's not happening."

H. Foley [06:06]: "Another kid for you to spit at. You're just spitting at each other, trying to gross each other out."

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5. Fashion Follies and Personal Style

Kevin and H. Foley dive into a playful discussion about fashion trends from their past, sharing personal mishaps and humorous insights into their wardrobe choices during their younger years.

Notable Quotes:

Kevin Ryan [27:09]: "I never really polished off the. I don't want to."

H. Foley [33:11]: "The outfit that Apatow's wife wears in. That was yours. That was your scene."

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6. Listener Questions and Interactions

The episode features a segment where the hosts address listener-submitted questions. They provide their humorous takes on various topics, maintaining their signature trashy comedy vibe.

Notable Quote:

H. Foley [20:11]: "No. It's a very, very thoughtful thing. I can't do it."

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7. Restaurant Etiquette Debates

A lively debate ensues as Kevin and H. Foley discuss the etiquette of handling mistaken or incomplete restaurant orders. They share their views on whether it's acceptable to check orders before leaving and the implications of doing so.

Notable Quotes:

Kevin Ryan [20:21]: "If you knock your utensils off the table at a nice restaurant, but you just kick them under further and act like you've never received them? That is the move."

H. Foley [58:54]: "Kicking under the table. And I'm with that."

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8. Reflections on Social Skills and Relationships

The hosts reflect on their social interactions and romantic relationships, blending introspection with humor. They candidly discuss their strengths and shortcomings in social settings.

Notable Quotes:

H. Foley [54:18]: "I'm good in the room."

Kevin Ryan [55:29]: "You thinking about going jerseys. They weren't so goddamn hot."

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9. Conclusion and Final Thoughts

As the episode wraps up, Kevin and H. Foley thank their listeners, encourage ticket purchases for their tour, and sign off with their characteristic humor and camaraderie.

Notable Quote:

H. Foley [63:02]: "But a lot of the cities, we can't add shows because of our schedule."

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Key Insights and Themes

• Nostalgia: The episode heavily leans into reminiscing about past experiences, highlighting the hosts' ability to find humor in their shared history.
• Humorous Critique: Whether it's food presentation or fashion choices, Kevin and H. Foley employ sharp wit to dissect and jest at various subjects.
• Listener Engagement: By addressing listener questions, the hosts maintain an interactive and relatable atmosphere.
• Comedic Style: True to their description, the hosts embody a "trashy" comedy approach, blending irreverence with genuine anecdotes.

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Overall Conclusion "Fancy Feast" showcases Kevin Ryan and H. Foley's chemistry and comedic prowess as they navigate through a tapestry of personal stories, humorous debates, and audience interactions. Their blend of self-deprecation, sharp wit, and unabashed honesty provides listeners with an entertaining and engaging experience, staying true to the essence of the Are You Garbage? podcast.

Transcript

[H. Foley]

Hey everybody out there. Back on the block tour still on sale.

[Kevin Ryan]

Gotcha bozos gang.

[H. Foley]

We're coming everywhere. Grab the squad and come out and see the boys talking about stand up comedy. Then we play a little ayg with the crowd. It's a good time.

[Kevin Ryan]

Oh, baby. This summer we're going to be Atlantic City. Then second show added in San Francisco, Portland, Oregon, Seattle, Brea, California, Burlington, Vermont, Boston. Tickets low tickets low. Ticket alert. Atlanta, Georgia, Charlotte, North Carolina, Raleigh, North Carolina, Richmond, Virginia, Baltimore, Maryland, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, Rochester, New York and Toronto, Canada. All tick tickets available at. Are you garbage.com let's get to the show.

[H. Foley]

Start the show. Welcome to another exciting edition of are you garbage? The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash. Now here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H. Foley. Hey everybody out there and welcome back to everybody's favorite podcast. This is RU Garbage. Oh yeah, it's that little show. We sit down with your favorite comedians and we find that if they're grouped to be classy. Yeah, they're just a big old piece of trash.

[Kevin Ryan]

Trash, trash, trash.

[H. Foley]

I'm your host, Dave Foley. Coming at you on a beautiful day. We're out back here with tooties in the new edition. She hit me with a wet willy this morning. A juicy one got right in my ear.

[Kevin Ryan]

Okay.

[H. Foley]

Little childish if you ask me. Mike host is coming at you from across the table. This is what we call the family episode. Just the boys, the bozos and the homies. He is the CEO of RU Garbage. He is an international businessman. This time of year. He's the king of the boards, baby. Look out down ashore. Hitting the boards. Shooting the hoops. Wowing the girls.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Scaring the kids. Give it up for kj Kevin, James Ryan, everybody.

[Kevin Ryan]

What up gang? Shout out to you as always, please make sure you rate view subscribe on itunes. Full video available on YouTube. Also full video available over there on Spotify.

[H. Foley]

Doing good in the charts.

[Kevin Ryan]

Fucking baby.

[H. Foley]

I think we were like 140 total.

[Kevin Ryan]

Total. That's pretty good for two idiots.

[H. Foley]

Oh, podcast. United States of America.

[Kevin Ryan]

Look out of the tri state area, you keep qualifying in southern Pennsylvania, climbing.

[H. Foley]

The charts and we're in the top 100 on comedy. Pretty good. Shout out to everybody over there on Spotify. Shout out to everybody on YouTube and all the subsidiaries.

[Kevin Ryan]

I knew you're gonna say that. And obviously the greatest website of all time, www.patreon.com garbage boys just hit an all time high over there. With 14,000 patrons, army of garbage is Strong. If you're not over there. Listen, if you're over there, the 14,000 of you, you know what you know, It's a goddamn party. If you're not over there, you don't know what you're missing out on.

[H. Foley]

Join the ranks. Get over there. 14,000.

[Kevin Ryan]

That is a small battalion.

[H. Foley]

It's not battalion.

[Kevin Ryan]

Whatever.

[H. Foley]

A regiment.

[Kevin Ryan]

Italian. It's a lot of Italian.

[H. Foley]

Oh, speaking of Italian, my nephew is down there at Wildwood this weekend.

[Kevin Ryan]

Shout out to it. He didn't. He didn't text me and ask for permission to be operating in my backyard.

[H. Foley]

First time down there with his little cronies. I told him. I was like, listen, that boardwalk at.

[Kevin Ryan]

Night, you get jammed up, mention Kiparino, Those the.

[H. Foley]

Those ain't private school kids on the boardwalk up there.

[Kevin Ryan]

They are not.

[H. Foley]

They got nothing. You mind your P's and Q's?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yes, we used to. It was. The big thing was I might.

[H. Foley]

Somebody want your tokens? You give them up.

[Kevin Ryan]

You give them your heads. Funcade. Card stack. Okay. That was always. The big thing is my brother and cousin would take me out like that. Like they, you know, I was jamming their style up. But I was a young kid. Babysitter, you know, parents are out drinking or whatever they're doing. They're down here getting dully nutted and kids are.

[H. Foley]

Kids get worked over under the. Under sand.

[Kevin Ryan]

I remember being out on the boardwalk till like midnight when I shouldn't have been. I mean, Danny and my cousin Liam are catching heaters. I'm about 7 years old.

[H. Foley]

Ocean City is one thing, but Wildwood was just scary.

[Kevin Ryan]

And they would always say, if those.

[H. Foley]

Kids will cut you, dude.

[Kevin Ryan]

They go, if we get enough. If we get in a fight, you run like you just get out of waddle. Go grab a slice at Sam's and that. No, but that was. I mean, because there was fights and they were, you know, they were fucking drunk idiots and everything. They were like you just. Unless there's.

[H. Foley]

Unless you're a liability.

[Kevin Ryan]

Unless there's another seven year old for you to square off with. Run. Get out of here.

[H. Foley]

Another kid for you to spit at. You're just spitting at each other, trying to gross each other out.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. That time of the year, though. Summers and the living. Zz. Yeah, I. I had one thing I wanted to. I wanted to show you. So, you know, we're. You might have seen.

[H. Foley]

You know, my door's always open to you.

[Kevin Ryan]

Unfortunately. I'm aware.

[H. Foley]

Help me, pitch me, show me. What do you got?

[Kevin Ryan]

You. There's I don't have you. I don't know if you've seen this. We're. We're fans of rotos that. I love rotisserie chicken.

[H. Foley]

Rotisserie chicken. Have you seen this for the bottom of it?

[Kevin Ryan]

Sure. Have you seen this one at a. At a French Michelin star restaurant?

[H. Foley]

I wouldn't fuck with this.

[Kevin Ryan]

You know it's coming.

[H. Foley]

I know exactly what's under there. It's like a. It's like.

[Kevin Ryan]

It's got black legs.

[H. Foley]

It's like a boiled hawk.

[Kevin Ryan]

Uh huh. Open that up. So let's see.

[H. Foley]

First of all, that's a bladder of something. That's like a sheep's gut.

[Kevin Ryan]

And they do this table size, so they. So if you're not. So. For the audio listener, they come out. Nice fancy joint. Mm. Yeah. I don't care how fancy you are. I ain't eating your. I ain't eating your black legged bird. That's not happening.

[H. Foley]

It's like guacamole tableside, but French style.

[Kevin Ryan]

And there's a. There's a. It looks like a pastry. It's like a big poof. And they open that up in the air. Sucks.

[H. Foley]

That ain't no pastry.

[Kevin Ryan]

I know. It looks like a pastry.

[H. Foley]

I'm telling you, that's a gallbladder.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm following you. I'm just saying. And once they pop it, it sucks up like a condom. And then they reveal the world's worst rotisserie chicken I've ever seen in my life.

[H. Foley]

Yeah, go ahead.

[Kevin Ryan]

It looks like. Oh, what could this be? This is fancy. Ooh.

[H. Foley]

It ain't chicken strips, I'll tell you that. I don't get this.

[Kevin Ryan]

The worst tenders I've ever seen in my.

[H. Foley]

I mean, that's like a fucking balloon. That is.

[Kevin Ryan]

Dude, the chicken, it looks undercooked. Why are the legs soaked? That's. I would fucking flip the table.

[H. Foley]

Caught him with his socks on.

[Kevin Ryan]

He's got a pair of dress on.

[H. Foley]

This is what they do now. That doesn't look that bad. I'm just not touching the skin. But I think you're crazy.

[Kevin Ryan]

I mean, dude, do that in the back. You're not bringing them black legs in that. In that yellow skin. To me. That ain't happening. Yeah, I gotta. I gotta. I gotta sift through that at the table.

[H. Foley]

That's a mallard or something.

[Kevin Ryan]

There's dirt still on them hoofs. They didn't shower eating dragons. That's. Yeah, that's. There's a thing when you get too fancy that it's not good. It's like, what is that?

[H. Foley]

I bet you it is a French.

[Kevin Ryan]

So what is it? A Bressi. Bressy chickens. A French breed, renowned Bressier. Bressier, Whatever. For their flavor and tenderness are considered a delicacy. What's the price on that go, do you think? See, if you get a price on. That's got to do.

[H. Foley]

Danger.

[Kevin Ryan]

You're getting tableside. Roto. That ain't prefixed half cooked.

[H. Foley]

Now, what they do is, first of all, they like that. They like the skin like that. You wouldn't. You wouldn't need poached chicken, would you? The skin's got to be crispy.

[Kevin Ryan]

I mean, it's. First of all, it's got to be real crispy. And like, there's a timeline, dude. Because sometimes you get that Roto home, you stop. You stop at the. You stop at the post office or something before you get home. That's. That's already rubbing.

[H. Foley]

I remember when my mom tried to introduce chicken thighs to us.

[Kevin Ryan]

That feels like you're eating dinosaur meat, dude. Who am I, Fred Flintstone?

[H. Foley]

I remember the first couple of times she made that. That skin got ripped right off. It was like, human.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, well, that's the problem on a Roto. If it stays too moist and, like, right off the breast is good. Around the legs is all right, but sometimes the. Underneath the hair follicles come back and you see, like, the. It's got goose skin.

[H. Foley]

It's like it's been sitting in a puddle. Nasty.

[Kevin Ryan]

Not my cup.

[H. Foley]

Very good. Yeah, I've seen that. That's nasty shit. I wouldn't fuck with it. I bet you the meat's probably pretty good inside.

[Kevin Ryan]

Hey, listen, you know what else is good? Fucking eels. Good, all that. You ain't doing that tableside, though. Give it to me straight. Do it. You do it.

[H. Foley]

I forgot about this. We were somewhere when we were back on tour. I can't remember where we were, but you. You were eating healthy and you tried to get chicken and some vegetables, and the chicken had that skin on the outside. I remember you were not a fan. I saw them hand you that plate, and I was like, hippie ain't gonna like this.

[Kevin Ryan]

It's gotta be like. It's gotta be good skin.

[H. Foley]

It looked like human skin with goosebumps.

[Kevin Ryan]

No, it looks like. It looks like a burn victim. And look, you know, hey, all things aside, I ain't messing with it.

[H. Foley]

It was like a chick's arm after a quick rain.

[Kevin Ryan]

No, you know, what was that after a quick Rain. You've been reading too much poetry. It was like. It was like a lady's bosom after a cold June rain. What are you talking about?

[H. Foley]

You know, like it's a little chill, like a woman's arm that gets, you know.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. You know, they're a shallow bath.

[H. Foley]

Fucking creep after a turn in the waterfalls. You know what I mean?

[Kevin Ryan]

I did.

[H. Foley]

Yeah, it was like good skin, but, you know, it was all goosebumpy.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, that's if I'm not a creep. I just want to shower you. Scrub you up real nice with the suds.

[H. Foley]

One of our boys.

[Kevin Ryan]

I know, I know. Yeah, relax. He does it. Protect the innocent. No. Yeah, it's. It's got to be. It's got. It's. Yeah. Also that's real fat. If I'm trying. I mean, like, if I'm having a bad. You know.

[H. Foley]

You know what they do with that shit Sometimes this will really freak you out. So they'll. Something'll have something like that. Now, for the audio listener that they had, like, it looks like an old coffee machine. It's like all steel or pewter or silver, and it's real fancy. So they have that table side. But then sometimes they'll take like a piece of the breast or the bone and they'll put it in this crusher and they'll turn it and it'll leak all the, like, all the, you know, the marrow and all that stuff into it into a cup. And then they'll make a sauce out of that. I mean, that's like. That's crossing the line.

[Kevin Ryan]

I mean, I'm fine with. That's what happens when you're like boiling down the carcass and stuff, all that stuff.

[H. Foley]

Yeah, but they're not doing a table side. Listen, hey, you want to do a.

[Kevin Ryan]

Caesar, Go ahead, buddy. I love sausage, too. I don't want them fucking grinding up the pig next day. Me, a couple of brats. Yeah, do that. Well, I'm fine with whatever you do. I don't want to see how the. The sausage is made.

[H. Foley]

Cut the legs off.

[Kevin Ryan]

Oh, yeah. Or die. Dot. Color them in or something. Put a pair. Put a pair of white tube socks on that joint. Let me. Let me think. He was. Just came from the gym.

[H. Foley]

I was gonna say a bear. Air Force One.

[Kevin Ryan]

At least finish the outfit.

[H. Foley]

Some sketchers on that.

[Kevin Ryan]

That one a Yankees had.

[H. Foley]

Ah, good stuff.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, that's tough. But we got a gosh darn family episode here. What do you got? Dead bird is about 60 if you want it alive. It's going to be about one live.

[H. Foley]

What are you talking about?

[Kevin Ryan]

If you're trying to raise these braze French chickens.

[H. Foley]

If we're trying to raise it.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Trying to get something to eat. What are you talking about?

[Kevin Ryan]

60 bucks.

[H. Foley]

60 bucks at a restaurant?

[Kevin Ryan]

No, if you're just buying it at home. If you're buying like the roast. Expensive.

[H. Foley]

So at a restaurant it's probably like 120 figure with the market. More than that, man.

[Kevin Ryan]

The expertise.

[H. Foley]

That's something you guys would be doing up there. Raising brassier chickens. That and pheasant. Have you ever had pheasant?

[Kevin Ryan]

Maybe once.

[H. Foley]

Have you?

[Kevin Ryan]

No.

[H. Foley]

Cornish game hen.

[Kevin Ryan]

You've met everyone in my family and know the life I've lived up until I met you. When have I. When was I having pheasant?

[H. Foley]

I remember the first time I saw Cornish game hunt at the grocery store. I started crying like a little baby eating kitten.

[Kevin Ryan]

Nah. Yeah, none of that. We were not, not adventurous when it came.

[H. Foley]

Twice baked potatoes, as far as the Foleys went.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, that was twice a year you got them maybe, maybe a couple times more. My stepdad started shout out to them.

[H. Foley]

Frozen Jones dude.

[Kevin Ryan]

I had. We had a tray of them like from like market day or whatever. Sitting in the market day. Markets like. Yeah, like it was like a catalog. It was like we've talked about. It was like a fundraiser type thing. And my mom worked in a hospital. So everybody like, you know, everybody in the last. At some point someone was coming in with. Hey, Susie's raising money for the.

[H. Foley]

I don't remember selling twice baked, but I remember chocolates and around the springtime.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, no, these were this, this came later. Even in my life it was market day, but whatever. There was a tray full of already pre made twice baked potatoes.

[H. Foley]

Hold on. That's what you were doing for fundraisers. You were selling meat out of the back of a van.

[Kevin Ryan]

I wasn't, but Denise would partake in it.

[H. Foley]

You get a sheet of those.

[Kevin Ryan]

But whatever. I don't know where it came from. I don't know. We didn't make them. I know that. We didn't have the tech course.

[H. Foley]

They're in like their, their. They're the half of the baked potato with like the, the. What's the bag?

[Kevin Ryan]

Puffer. Yeah, whatever. Pastry bag.

[H. Foley]

Yes. With the, with the, with the twice baked potato on top.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, I know what they look like. I'm explaining it to you. I had a tray of them in the fucking freezer.

[H. Foley]

Uh huh.

[Kevin Ryan]

Which I. For a long time I thought they were really Big deviled eggs, if I'm being honest with you. And I was not touching them for an after school kind of hoagies.

[H. Foley]

That.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, it looked like Dino eggs. No, thank you. I remember just staring at them for, like, years at being hungry after school, home alone, going, how the hell am I gonna even make this thing? I know. Well, I can't just have three of these bars, 15 cans of Coke and three of them.

[H. Foley]

Man, your mom would think you're so fat. He came home.

[Kevin Ryan]

She did. I mean, if we're being honest with you, she did.

[H. Foley]

Plus, that's like an hour in the oven.

[Kevin Ryan]

Oh, I didn't have time for that.

[H. Foley]

You hit him frozen.

[Kevin Ryan]

Cracked a few molars twice baked pops. Now, a lot of times that would go to the craft singles on over a plate of Tostitos in a microwave. Sure found that out. Talk about tableside. Couldn't tell.

[H. Foley]

Ain't no feet on that right now.

[Kevin Ryan]

Couldn't tell me nothing. That and I would take this one as real gym. We were a real gym. The song. There was a hierarchy of areas you would look for. For food and snacks, right? Pantry, pantry, fridge, fridge. It went for me. It went pantry. No, that's a lie. There was like a snack corner above, like, the Lazy Susan. That was where the chips and pretzels were. If that was thin, maybe hit you with a couple of croutons, something in.

[H. Foley]

There, loaf of bread, little garlic salt, mold you over.

[Kevin Ryan]

Well, that was the spice. If you were looking in the spice section, you were fucked.

[H. Foley]

I would say, if you're digging around in the bot. The freezer for some chipped raviolis, you're jammed up.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, we saw a lot of times. But it went. It went to chip drawer, then the pantry with, like, food that you would have to make. There was some cookies or some goldfish in there from time to time. But that was like, you got Siri. You got to assemble that stuff.

[H. Foley]

Sure.

[Kevin Ryan]

Nothing super ready to make, you know, ready to eat. Then the fridge, then the freezer. Then there was the spice thing. And you'd go looking in there sometimes.

[H. Foley]

Remember finding after that, you're chasing squirrels.

[Kevin Ryan]

Around the backyard fighting for moldy bread. I remember dude that found the semi sweet toll house morsels. And I was like, that's when it hit. I didn't know because they were. That was always an ingredient.

[H. Foley]

Those hit.

[Kevin Ryan]

I didn't realize. I'm like, I can just eat these mother.

[H. Foley]

Those hit.

[Kevin Ryan]

So I started, you know, that was like, while I'm digging, looking. That was the appetizer that was, you know, keeping me going. Then I started melting them johns down and dipping scoops in there. Pretzels.

[H. Foley]

Oh, that's. Man, that is a fat ass kid.

[Kevin Ryan]

They were the hers. Blue bag thin, extra crispy pretzels, man.

[H. Foley]

They sell that now. That's a high commodity.

[Kevin Ryan]

Flips or dips. I was doing them way before them. I was an innovator. Leave a fat kid home alone from school.

[H. Foley]

I remember I made the mistake of grabbing a piece of baking chocolate one time.

[Kevin Ryan]

We never. I don't even think we had that.

[H. Foley]

Man. That'll jam me up a. No sugar in that. Fucking brutal. Get out of here with that's real smart. Dip in the.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, but then she found that out.

[H. Foley]

That is.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Yeah. She went to make Christmas cookies and it was fucking three chips in there.

[Kevin Ryan]

I was always the king of.

[H. Foley]

Like, we're doing shortbreads.

[Kevin Ryan]

Leave a couple. Like. I never. I never really polished off the. I don't want to.

[H. Foley]

You know, for a minute, my mom and dad. I don't know if I told you for a minute my mom and dad were on like a vitamin kick. And I can't remember the name of them, but they had these like chocolate chewables that were in like a little box. I can't remember what.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, they're like vitamins. I know. Yeah, yeah. Viactive. They were viactive. That was for. That was for old broads. That's what that was.

[H. Foley]

Those things hit.

[Kevin Ryan]

I think it was viacta. I took those all the time.

[H. Foley]

Oh, they were so good that the chewable vitamin C in the morning. I didn't mind.

[Kevin Ryan]

I do. When vitamin C hit. And we were. I mean, Ross, we were popping them like Tic Tacs. Like six, five. We would put. See how many we could put in our mouth.

[H. Foley]

Pissing neon green. Never got sick the whole year. We never got Flintstones. That was rich kid shit.

[Kevin Ryan]

We had them for a little.

[H. Foley]

We only took them in high school when we were dropping acid. Keep the high going. That's what they said.

[Kevin Ryan]

Sure.

[H. Foley]

You were dipping. You grab a glass of oj. Kimmy, how about them true classics?

[Kevin Ryan]

Let's talk about the true classics.

[H. Foley]

Not just T shirts no more. They got the whole line over there.

[Kevin Ryan]

Doing it all baby. Good look good.

[H. Foley]

Big guys out there. True classics. Get yourself a 3XL. Fits good on the pipes and nice on the belly. Keep you looking smooth and clean all summer long. You wear them other T shirts. They get all messed up. I swear to God. True Classics. I feel like they get better as you wash. They do they get a little bit thicker? They don't. They don't. They go out of shape on you. It's honestly the best T shirt you're ever gonna put on. So do yourself a favor. Go over to True Classics, check out all the other stuff they got over there. They got a whole line over there.

[Kevin Ryan]

Like I'm telling you, it keeps you in budget, too. It ain't gonna break the bank. Listen, they're probably not gonna want me to say this, but I've stepped out on the True Classic family. I'm an idiot. I'm bad.

[H. Foley]

Oh, yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

And I gotta tell you, it was the worst decision. I came crawling back. I said I'm sorry. Take me back.

[H. Foley]

What, you get a taste?

[Kevin Ryan]

Well, I bought this. Other ones, that was in a. Off a whim, and I mean, they stunk. They get the neck's all come up, the sleeves, shorten up. I was all wearing a halter top.

[H. Foley]

Brutal. You got to go True Classic.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yes. You can grab them at Target, Costco, or head to trueclassic.com garbage and get hooked up today. Do it. Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Gang, this is an ad brought to you by BetterHelp.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

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[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. It's okay to struggle. Real strength comes from opening up about what you're carrying and doing something about it. That's the hardest part. Hard as jumping in a pool, baby. And BetterHelp makes it easy. Take it from us.

[H. Foley]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

So you can be at your best for yourself and everyone in your life. I got a kid coming on the way that's, you know, making sure everything. Talk about pressure.

[H. Foley]

Yikes.

[Kevin Ryan]

Under pressure, I'm jammed up. And listen, talk therapy has helped me.

[H. Foley]

He's gonna lose.

[Kevin Ryan]

It has helped me a bunch. Here we go. As the largest online therapy provider in the world, BetterHelp can provide access to mental health professionals with a diverse variety of expertise. Expertise. You talk it out with Better Help our listeners get 10% off their first month at betterhelp.com garbage. That's BetterHelp. H E lp.com/garbage. Do it.

[H. Foley]

All right.

[Kevin Ryan]

Let's get in. We got some. Gosh darn. This is a family episode. As you know. When you join the old Patreon A. We will answer your garbage question on the air. Got some humdingers here. This one's from Mr. Cayman Snatch. Oh, okay. Is it garbage to check your to go order before leaving the establishment?

[H. Foley]

No. It's a very, very thoughtful thing. I can't do it.

[Kevin Ryan]

You know I said extra honey mustard.

[H. Foley]

I can't do it. You don't go looking through.

[Kevin Ryan]

I do feel. It feels like the people I've seen do it and the people I know that do it. It comes from like a very they're trying to catch you moment. They're. They're looking for. I asked for extra you. It seems like it's always a very aha. Got you that they're. They're looking for that because they've been screwed over once before. It's not all the time. Doing a due diligence Chinese.

[H. Foley]

That's big.

[Kevin Ryan]

It's going. We don't trust you.

[H. Foley]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

And I'm never gonna trust you.

[H. Foley]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

So I'm taking. I trust them.

[H. Foley]

The way I look at it when it comes to that stuff. I know it's crazy. You get what you get.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm right there with you.

[H. Foley]

Keep your mouth shut. And that's just the way it went. You don't. They forget your sodas or your duck sauce or your mustard or your egg roll. Well, the egg roll. I might take issue with that. Sure. Any Chinese food on the goddamn egg roll to my asshole.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. It just seems I. I do the same thing. It's like you roll the dice. If it happens. It's happening. What, maybe two out of a hundred times are the orders getting messed. It's not that.

[H. Foley]

I feel like they're way worse these days. I mean there's so much more takeout.

[Kevin Ryan]

Going on and well, if that was the. They'd be better now. Okay. And you're theory. I understand.

[H. Foley]

I'm saying there's more. There's more takeout going out the door. So there's more room for more people are getting takeout than ever before in the history of human beings.

[Kevin Ryan]

Sure.

[H. Foley]

Right. Would you give me that?

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't think it's a question. Of course.

[H. Foley]

Yeah. So there's, you know there's gonna be a lot more mistakes because the numbers are higher.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, but that doesn't necessarily.

[H. Foley]

They're not getting better at it. They're still the same at it.

[Kevin Ryan]

I would argue you're completely. I would argue that's wrong.

[H. Foley]

You think?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. If you do anything more. I do. I listen. I can't remember doing stand up 15 years.

[H. Foley]

I still stink. What are you talking about?

[Kevin Ryan]

You don't really work at it. I would argue. I mean, we order a lot of takeout on the road. A lot of UberEats, a lot of deliveries, a lot of coffees. How often is the. Is the order messed up from the top down? To me, it would be rare. A lot of times, these. These. You get these bikers with the. In New York, and they're. They're driving 15 miles with your coffee. It ends up.

[H. Foley]

That soda's always.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, that. But that. That's the delivery method. That's not the packing it.

[H. Foley]

At the restaurant.

[Kevin Ryan]

I would. I got. I got a. I got UberEats the other day. Did you and the guy. It was typically so in New York. 99% of them are on a bike. This guy was in a car, and he was coming from the Upper west side up to Washington Heights. I don't know why he chose that. Whatever it was, but, I mean, it must have took him two and a half hours. It was gridlock, traffic.

[H. Foley]

And this guy want you to come downstairs?

[Kevin Ryan]

No, but I'm just saying, like, literally, like, an hour and a half went by, and he was still. You had only made it, like, 10 blocks. I wanted to be like, dude, have the lunch. I'll report this to Uber. Let's just go. It didn't work out. The city said no. And that's what it is.

[H. Foley]

That's a real deal deal breaker for me.

[Kevin Ryan]

What?

[H. Foley]

I got to go downstairs.

[Kevin Ryan]

Mm.

[H. Foley]

That's one of the main reasons we never order Domino's. Because you got to go downstairs. Domino's doesn't bring it upstairs. You got to go down. It's yours. Not going down there. No. My underwear.

[Kevin Ryan]

Sure.

[H. Foley]

Plus, then I gotta see. Then they're gonna see me walking upstairs with six pizzas or something like that.

[Kevin Ryan]

Why you ordering six pizzas?

[H. Foley]

Whatever.

[Kevin Ryan]

You know, Whatever.

[H. Foley]

I'm not ordering six pizzas.

[Kevin Ryan]

I mean, it's enough that you're not going down to pick it up.

[H. Foley]

Two pies. There's other people there. I'm not there by myself.

[Kevin Ryan]

Doesn't count.

[H. Foley]

I'm not ordering two pizzas. She likes the thin crust. I like the pan.

[Kevin Ryan]

Mm. But sure.

[H. Foley]

Well, it's not meant to be unfortunate. Going downstairs to get it.

[Kevin Ryan]

Sure.

[H. Foley]

Bullshit.

[Kevin Ryan]

All right, let's see here. This one's from Foley's Pop Yoga Ball. Longtime homie. Do any of the women in your family smoke cigars? Oh, dude, my aunt used to always have a cigar on her most times already. Partially smoked. What is she. Was she working a dog track?

[H. Foley]

Tough broad.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's crazy.

[H. Foley]

Get over here and give me a kiss. No, but can I say this? This is gonna sound. I don't know. They. It was in big in the. In the early 2000s where it was when cigars got real popular. It was like a cool thing for hot chicks to have them.

[Kevin Ryan]

I think that was in, like, movies and stuff. I don't remember really that rubber hitting the road.

[H. Foley]

I remember, like, Cindy Crawford, like, holding a cigar or something.

[Kevin Ryan]

That was a lot, I think, like, photo ops and like, hot girl doing manly thing. Like, it's a. Pat's a powerful broad now. I don't think it. No hot chicks I know have ever been like, let me get a rip of that swisher Sweet or whatever.

[H. Foley]

No, but who's the. Who's the lady that sings the anxiety song?

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't know, Luke, you should know this. The anxiety anxiety.

[H. Foley]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know.

[Kevin Ryan]

I was. That's like.

[H. Foley]

She was at the Met gala and part dochi. Yes. Part of her costume was she had a cigar.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

I don't like that.

[Kevin Ryan]

I mean, I get that. That's not hot. You hear that? This just in, folks. Overweight men in their 50s don't think hot chicks smoking cigars is attractive and not my thing. And if that's the case, I'll take my deep dish pizza to go, but.

[H. Foley]

I'm not going downstairs to get it.

[Kevin Ryan]

You got to. You got to bring your. Your hot ass up here.

[H. Foley]

It is. I have lost. I can't really comment on anything or anybody.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm well aware. Right, but for some reason, you still do. You still shit on everybody on the team. And we've gotten to the point where we're like, I don't even know what to say now. This is crazy.

[H. Foley]

Grammy Award winning artist at the Met Gala, probably wearing Gucci or something. Nice. And I'm like, nah, I don't like the cigar. Bring my pizza to my front door. Got a lot of nerve.

[Kevin Ryan]

You do. You got. You got brass balls, dude.

[H. Foley]

All right. Smoke the cigars. I'm giving Shit.

[Kevin Ryan]

My. It's just. It is a tough. That was one of those things I don't think ever really happened. You know what I mean, how is it around the time chicks were wearing fedoras and you're like, what are we doing? A lot of pinstripe vest like that? Like. Yeah, that was when I've said you had to dress business casual to go out for some reason.

[H. Foley]

The outfit that Apatow's wife wears in.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yes. And 40 year old virgin. Yes, very much. That was of the time of. Yeah, that was cool girl stuff.

[H. Foley]

That was yours. That was your scene.

[Kevin Ryan]

I was young in that. I mean, I was in my scene.

[H. Foley]

I. That's your touch to me. That's your time. That in Yellow Card or whatever the hell the band's name is.

[Kevin Ryan]

I mean, yeah, sure. I don't. I don't really know.

[H. Foley]

You never wore a vest out.

[Kevin Ryan]

I never had a vest. I would have. I'm like, I don't have that body where you guys are well aware. I don't have vest body. I look like we should be working in the bathroom handing out mints for a dollar. No way do I. Was I my best guy?

[H. Foley]

Like a Seth Green generation?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, that was very much cool guys doing cool.

[H. Foley]

That's you, Is it? Aren't you? Seth Green Entourage.

[Kevin Ryan]

I mean, that what existed. Yeah. I wouldn't say I was trying to be set.

[H. Foley]

How old were you when that was going on?

[Kevin Ryan]

High school, College. Yeah. Yeah, that's you. I mean, there's not. There's no cool guys in high school. I would argue the guys that aren't wearing. The people who ran for doors to high school were not cool.

[H. Foley]

Any of your friends in high school or college wear it? Tie?

[Kevin Ryan]

I did. Yeah. Not high school. You.

[H. Foley]

Wait, what do you mean?

[Kevin Ryan]

No, probably not college. Like after college.

[H. Foley]

Like you don't have a job. Like you don't have a job.

[Kevin Ryan]

Hold on a second. We've talked about that.

[H. Foley]

Have we?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

You wore a tie out.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. You wear like a tie and like a sweater.

[H. Foley]

Like, undone.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, it only. I only had one version that looked good when the lights were out. Dude, I've seen you wear a scarf to shoot a sketch thinking you were a fucking French director eating rotos with black legs. What are you talking about?

[H. Foley]

Hey, I didn't say that I was cool.

[Kevin Ryan]

I know, but I mean, mine was.

[H. Foley]

At least gonna make fun of you.

[Kevin Ryan]

Mine was at least of the time.

[H. Foley]

Did you put the collar on the outside? Did you ever wear a sweater vest?

[Kevin Ryan]

No.

[H. Foley]

A sweater with no sleeves?

[Kevin Ryan]

No, I.

[H. Foley]

Cause that was.

[Kevin Ryan]

The boobs were bad for that. I needed baggy around the armpits to cover the. To cover the day I saw a.

[H. Foley]

Picture of you one time where you dressed like Avril Lavigne. He had the things going up here.

[Kevin Ryan]

Like the socks I'm cutting myself.

[H. Foley]

He was a skater boy. Yeah, that stuff was all whack.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, I. Listen, I, I'm. Well, it's well documented that anything of a time you look back 15 years fucking stinks.

[H. Foley]

I don't.

[Kevin Ryan]

You got it. You had a lot of bad haircuts back in the day. Sure. It was 90s year when I met you. The bowl cut when I. You had that like fucking Stone Temple Pilots haircut. That's the only. That's the only thing I can refer to it in my head where you. I remember finding a YouTube video. You would put. Oh, he started talking. We started. We started being chum. Started being.

[H. Foley]

You know, I remember this series of videos I did.

[Kevin Ryan]

You thought. And I just remember being like, oh.

[H. Foley]

This was me at the desk.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. And I remember being like, Foley is a pretty cool guy. Then I remember seeing those videos. I was like, oh, man, I can't be friends with this dude. Cut to look at us now. Best pals.

[H. Foley]

There you go.

[Kevin Ryan]

Don't look at me like that. Looking at me like a deep dish.

[H. Foley]

Nora Jones over here.

[Kevin Ryan]

Shut up. She had a couple of hits.

[H. Foley]

Yeah, great. It's funny, two things on this one. I don't see that happening now.

[Kevin Ryan]

You're nuts. You think, dude, the baggy pants are back. And listen, news flash out there, if you're over 18 and you're. If you're a grown man, if you have children and you're wearing baggy pants, you are a fucking dork. I mean, look so fucking corny the.

[H. Foley]

Way him and his cronies all dress.

[Kevin Ryan]

He's in his 20s. I have a ron right now.

[H. Foley]

You have one on.

[Kevin Ryan]

No, no, they're not as crazy baggy, but like they're. No, there is people we are friends with that are like wearing bat like pants that I used to wear when I skateboard.

[H. Foley]

Those.

[Kevin Ryan]

They're. You're not that far off and it's like you're in your 40s. Sir.

[H. Foley]

Machine gun Kelly's wearing them in his new video.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, he's. He's a rapper, pop star, good looking kid. I'll give it. He's covered. That's the guy that can do it. If you're like, you know, you can't be running errands in baggy jeans. Machine Gun Kelly ain't running errands.

[H. Foley]

True.

[Kevin Ryan]

You know what I mean? If that's who you are? Sure. But if you just like, if you have a regular job or whatever.

[H. Foley]

Well, the second part of what I was gonna say is, even though, like, when all that stuff was going on, just for a little context, I was the worst I've ever been. I was like. I was like a shut in. I hated all that stuff. I hated pop culture at the time.

[Kevin Ryan]

You still hate it.

[H. Foley]

I just got my heart broken trashing.

[Kevin Ryan]

Beyonce's daughter not too long ago. Like, what are you doing?

[H. Foley]

Trying to get me killed? Shut up. Cut that rat. So you know, I'll be in the trunk of a car up in Harlem. That ain't happening.

[Kevin Ryan]

Okay.

[H. Foley]

Out in Brooklyn.

[Kevin Ryan]

Okay.

[H. Foley]

Where did he roll? Macy Projects.

[Kevin Ryan]

Marcy.

[H. Foley]

Yeah. No, thank you.

[Kevin Ryan]

Macy's.

[H. Foley]

Cut all this.

[Kevin Ryan]

Strawberries and clothier. What, you want me tied up in a Target?

[H. Foley]

Well, he got killed in a pennies. I didn't say anything about his daughter.

[Kevin Ryan]

Okay.

[H. Foley]

Your rat.

[Kevin Ryan]

Okay, guy who's backpedaling.

[H. Foley]

What I was gonna say is I hated all that stuff at the time. And I also hated it because we were coming out of the 90s and that was my time, man. You know what I mean? That's when it was real.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Pearl Jam, Pumpkins, yeah, Nirvana. But it was real.

[Kevin Ryan]

But now that was like 92. But now, dude, even then, you're 10 years after it. Hold on.

[H. Foley]

Talking about. I was a kid in 92.

[Kevin Ryan]

I know, but you're like, dude, 2004, if you're still upset that what you used to do was a decade ago, you're holding on too long.

[H. Foley]

I'm a loser, baby.

[Kevin Ryan]

Choking on the splinters. You are a loser, baby.

[H. Foley]

Anyway, I look back on that fashion now with some fondness and wouldn't mind going back to that.

[Kevin Ryan]

What?

[H. Foley]

Like, you know, the. Like the. The. The. The Lugs sweatsuits and stuff like that. That stuff was all right. Everybody seemed a lot more comfortable back then.

[Kevin Ryan]

Wait, lug sweatsuits? Is that what you're equating to me wearing a fedora? Me just like Avril Lavigne. And also lug sweats.

[H. Foley]

That was all at the same time. The whole entourage.

[Kevin Ryan]

Look, the show was on for a decade. You can't.

[H. Foley]

It was their decade.

[Kevin Ryan]

Okay?

[H. Foley]

It was all the same style all the way through.

[Kevin Ryan]

Okay, Yeah. I mean, yeah. Just certain different years. Your genre bending? I guess, a little bit. Yeah. Turtle wasn't dressing like E. He dressed normal. Sure.

[H. Foley]

He was always straight all the way through, which is funny, when I go back and watch that, I identify the most with. With E. Mm.

[Kevin Ryan]

You're a whiny little bitch.

[H. Foley]

Really starting trouble here.

[Kevin Ryan]

You hear that? Hey, character.

[H. Foley]

No, but like the way Turtle used to dress.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

I mean, she was comfortable.

[Kevin Ryan]

That would be a lot of their baggy velour.

[H. Foley]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

Heavy denim, though. Those jeans were like £15.

[H. Foley]

They were brutal. I wouldn't mind that coming back.

[Kevin Ryan]

G Unit Heavyweight denim.

[H. Foley]

That's what I mean.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, I used to ride and then with the. With a tight big collar, like a nice heavyweight tee.

[H. Foley]

Yeah, that was all 50 Cent, right?

[Kevin Ryan]

I used to buy my G Unit T shirts at TJ Maxx over there on Street Road. How you doing? I remember I went in there one time.

[H. Foley]

That was all 50. That was 50 cents clothing brand.

[Kevin Ryan]

What?

[H. Foley]

G Unit.

[Kevin Ryan]

That was his rap. That was his group. That was his. That was his posse. It was 50 cent in G. But those.

[H. Foley]

He was. That he was in, he was. That was his company.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

A smart businessman, huh?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, I was just looking at something he sold. He had G Unit sneakers. They made like $80 million. Vitamin Water sold 4 million pairs of them.

[H. Foley]

He hit.

[Kevin Ryan]

He made a. He made a hundred. They made 100 million of vitamin water. And then like now he shows he power and all. There's like 10 of them.

[H. Foley]

Yeah, man. All from that one song in the.

[Kevin Ryan]

In the club for now. One song.

[H. Foley]

He's got a lot of hits.

[Kevin Ryan]

He came in like a fucking whoo.

[H. Foley]

Just took over as J.

[Kevin Ryan]

As Jay z once said, 50 came through like hurricanes do. That's pretty fucked up the game. How you doing? There's an interview where they're like trickle.

[H. Foley]

Down to your fat ass.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm at TJ Maxx bumping many men. And my mom's.

[H. Foley]

What was the name of that club in Philly that was above that Italian restaurant?

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't know why? You like the Italian restaurant, didn't you? Nice. Shut it out up there. I'm trying to eat. You break in, you're eating. You're eating garlic Davios. Oh, G Lounge.

[H. Foley]

Yeah. That's where you used to hang out. That's where you find Kevin Ryan on a Thursday before 11.

[Kevin Ryan]

You wish. I wish was. That was. That was mover. And that's where Pat Barrel used to go hang out. My brother would be in there with Pat Barrel. G Lounge at Davios. I never made it in Air maybe once.

[H. Foley]

What was your go to in Philly that you like to go to? You and the boys?

[Kevin Ryan]

We would go to bar. I mean like the. The Mad River, Shout Out. That was a dirt bag. Early 20s, underage. Bar.

[H. Foley]

You couldn't get in a G Lounge?

[Kevin Ryan]

What? G Lounge? What are you crazy? That was our generation. Studio 54, dude. G Lounge. No, I couldn't get into G Lounge.

[H. Foley]

Splitting a bottle 17 ways.

[Kevin Ryan]

I never understood it. People, I remember thinking like, whoa, this is the name. We were at G Lounge. I couldn't wrap my. I couldn't. I couldn't figure out how to get there on MapQuest.

[H. Foley]

That's how far girls in there would have thought you were a garage.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'd be in there in my. I'd have my colle sticking out of my polo outlet crew neck Banana republic. No, not even I was at that point. That was all. That was all put on an express credit card that I never paid.

[H. Foley]

It's out.

[Kevin Ryan]

Got badass breath and shit. Just in there talking warm sigmouth.

[H. Foley]

Going. Smelling like Parliaments and cranberry juice.

[Kevin Ryan]

Drinking Captain and Cokes.

[H. Foley]

It's called a Kuba Libre.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm drinking a White Russian now.

[H. Foley]

My brother has a tab open.

[Kevin Ryan]

Sure. That was the only way.

[H. Foley]

Oh, shit.

[Kevin Ryan]

Is that Chase Utley making out with my mom? No. Yeah, I didn't. Now we would do Mad river those.

[H. Foley]

Guys were blowing through. Talking about going through like a hurricane.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, we would do Lucy's. Lucy's was a dive, a cooler dive bar. It was like a center city dive.

[H. Foley]

Kind of Bob and Barbers.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, we were do. I was. I mean, if we were hanging out, that was the. The coolest place I would go was Lucy's. That was it. On Thursday. I couldn't get in on a Saturday. I go in Thursday watching early. Watching early Sixers game. And stay.

[H. Foley]

You guys come in. But yo, man, you got a piece of grilled onion on your shirt.

[Kevin Ryan]

I said no onions. I go in. I go in for lunch. I'm just hanging out in the brew closet till later. Ah, I stunk.

[H. Foley]

You girls do oil and vinegar and mayo on your sandwiches? I do them both. All you got to do is you put the cheese in the microwave with some chips. It's better than waiting for a twice baked potato. Am I right? So whose birthday is it? It's my buddy Pat. His eyes are rolling in the back of.

[Kevin Ryan]

He used to get thrown out of there. Out of the pack of Lucy's. They would just take him. We'd be like, party and whatever. It'd be so crowded. And he would. You know, he'd eventually get thrown out and they push him out this back door. And it. We never real. We never figured out where it let you out. It just put you like in an alley. Like a system of alleyways that he would call us and be like, I don't know where I'm at.

[H. Foley]

And getting respawned.

[Kevin Ryan]

He'd wake up on another side of the map. He didn't know Larry was dude. And every time like. And he would just like, you know, we would not. That was back in the day you lost someone, you know, I mean, we had cell phones where you're just like. We used to have a strict rule after midnight, every man for himself. You got to get home. You got to get. Like if you don't have keys, like if you're. If me and you live together and we go out, it's like both people take you don't be. If you can't get in, that's your fault. It's every man for him. So you gotta get home. So warm weather hits gang and suddenly everyone is juggling vacations, visitors zero routine. Hydro brings everyone back. That structure, you can get quick, efficient workouts and it keeps you feeling grounded no matter what the calendar looks like, baby. The good folks over at Hydro have been nice enough to send us a machine. And I gotta tell you, it's a secret weapon for a full body workout. And as you know, Kippy's getting into shape. It hits like 80, 86% of your muscles. You got your arms, your legs, your core, all of it. And knock it out in 20 minutes. Super efficient and actually works. Whether you're training hard or just trying to stay active, hydro really meets where you're at. It's low impact, easy on a joint. Even a big man can do it. But you still get the perfect mix of strength and cardio. You never get bored. Hydro's got tons of workouts, actual Olympians that they're filmed in these gorgeous outdoor spots all over the world makes it easy to stay engaged and motivated. And if you're on the fence, there's free shipping, a 30 day risk trial hydro offers a full year warranty. So honestly, there's no pressure. Just try it and see how it feels. Skip the gym. Not to work out. Stay on track with Hydro for a limited time, go to hydro.com and use the code garbage to save up to $475 off your hydro pro rower Dorian Hydro's Memorial Day sale. That's Hydro H Y--R-O-W.com Code Garbage to save up to $475 Hydro.com Code Garbage do this episode is brought to you by Lifelock. Not everyone is careful with your personal Information which might explain why there's a victim of identity theft every five seconds in the U.S. fortunately, there's LifeLock. LifeLock monitors hundreds of millions of data points a second for threats to your identity. If your identity is stolen, a US based restoration specialist will fix it, guaranteed. Or your money back. Save up to 40% your first year by visiting visiting lifelock.com podcast. Terms apply. Striking out. Getting thrown out of every bar.

[H. Foley]

Dude, think I left one of my shoes in there.

[Kevin Ryan]

That did happen down the shore. We had a bar called Flip Flops and I had flip flops on and they. I got thrown out on my birthday.

[H. Foley]

They saw your toes.

[Kevin Ryan]

Hammer toes. And we got thrown out. Me and Pat Road Dog got. I mean, we've been thrown out of most bars I've ever been in. We got thrown out and I was just like, hey, man. I remember, dude. They just gripped me up. They put me in a full nelson and just walked me out. And what? We weren't fighting. We were just like drunk. I think we were maybe splashing.

[H. Foley]

Yeah, my gut's sticking out, man.

[Kevin Ryan]

Come on. I was bad. I'm. Fuck it. I'm like crunched over trying to get my shirt to hang down. My deep ass. Belly buttons hanging.

[H. Foley]

I'm peeling and who you girls going next? Banging your head.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'll see you Keenan's. But I was like, hey. I was like. I was. My. My flip flop. Like, I'm not with My flip flops are inside. And I was talking to the bar, the bouncer. I'm like, isn't. It's pretty ironic I was fucking with them. Like, it's pretty ironic. My. My flip flops are stuck inside a flip flop.

[H. Foley]

He did not.

[Kevin Ryan]

He did not.

[H. Foley]

You play football.

[Kevin Ryan]

I think he did.

[H. Foley]

Wish it was goons did.

[Kevin Ryan]

Sure. All those days are behind me.

[H. Foley]

Sure.

[Kevin Ryan]

I. I might. I don't have to get any fashion swings. Black T shirt.

[H. Foley]

And me.

[Kevin Ryan]

No, just in general. I'm not trying to be cool ever again.

[H. Foley]

Oh, no.

[Kevin Ryan]

What are you doing? Just like Rosie o' Donnell right now.

[H. Foley]

I think this is a good thing for a man my age.

[Kevin Ryan]

If you're in a bowling league, I want to.

[H. Foley]

I want to start wearing those shirts like that dude King whatever his name is on Instagram.

[Kevin Ryan]

Where King von. No bleep that. I gonna get you.

[H. Foley]

No, from the grave.

[Kevin Ryan]

From the grave.

[H. Foley]

He's. He's this tall dude. He's always. He's always getting chicks on Instagram.

[Kevin Ryan]

Is that. Is that. That's the guy you're relating with? The guy that's always getting chicks.

[H. Foley]

No, but he wears these, like. They're almost like bowling shirts, but they're solid. Listen, real cool on him.

[Kevin Ryan]

You've been big enough long enough.

[H. Foley]

He's like six, eight and gorgeous.

[Kevin Ryan]

You know, you can't pull off what most, myself included. It don't look good on us.

[H. Foley]

Sure. Thinking about going jerseys.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's a fat guy choice. I would love to do hockey jerseys. They weren't so goddamn hot.

[H. Foley]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

Smelly.

[H. Foley]

I don't like the string up front either.

[Kevin Ryan]

They don't have to do the string.

[H. Foley]

No, they're tight, too.

[Kevin Ryan]

They also don't fall right. The arms are. The arms are wide and stuff. It's a choice to be in a hockey jersey. Yeah. I wish I could do it. They made them a little tighter, I'd be all right. Yeah. A little more snug walking around with.

[H. Foley]

A Hurricanes jersey on. Dork. Anyway, we digress.

[Kevin Ryan]

Sure. All right. Let's see here. This one's funny. I was. Speaking of clothing. Ian never had one red and then parentheses. I did have one red. Have you ever worn a piece of a Halloween costume as regular clothing? That's pretty good.

[H. Foley]

I might have.

[Kevin Ryan]

Really good.

[H. Foley]

We had this one. Sick. I don't know where my mom got the money, but it was one year when we were. I think my brother made. Maybe it was 12 or 13. He got this pirate outfit that was unbelievable.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's what I was gonna say, dude.

[H. Foley]

It was, like, authentic. It was awesome. I had some tinfoil hat on or something. I was. I was dressed as a cardinal. That's what I went that year. As a cardinal.

[Kevin Ryan]

Like the. For like the. The Catholic Cardinals or like the football team?

[H. Foley]

Just a bird, huh? No, it was a Catholic cardinal. Yeah, it was weird.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's.

[H. Foley]

And I tried. I tried. I made my own sword with tinfoil and.

[Kevin Ryan]

Is it cardinal? All right, listen, I'm. I'm a man of God, but I'll kill you right now.

[H. Foley]

I had to have something on me. Am I walking around with a piece of the Eucharist? Like an. That's what he got. He got a sick pirate outfit.

[Kevin Ryan]

I used to. I have mine with. Mine also, too. Is a was. Yeah. We were never great at Halloween, but I had a. I was a pirate. It's probably six years old, seven years old.

[H. Foley]

Beard. Hey, the dreaded pirate fat beard.

[Kevin Ryan]

She got a bag full of dinner rolls. Sword. For the sword to butter my bread. It did. It had that curved sword. You know that. The curved sword, right? That was, like, big. And it had Like a red and white striped shirt and a pair of black pants that were like cut off. Like Frankenstein pants kind of. You know what I mean? Like, they were a little. They were like, like flood pants, you know? And I used to wear the out of them pants even way after. I think I like the way they felt on my wee wee or whatever. Used to mash my wean on the stairs and a pair of wooden shoes. But man, I would wear that. And I remember my mom being like, take them freaking pants off. I'd be like trying to wear them to school and stuff though with my tie.

[H. Foley]

It's. Well after Thanksgiving.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm out front of G Lounge with them. My brother's in there.

[H. Foley]

Ahoy, mateys. Ahoy, ladies.

[Kevin Ryan]

Three of your finest meads, please.

[H. Foley]

Any you broads want to walk the plank, huh? No? All right. Yeah, that pirate outfit had like this cool hanging almost like a burlap vest.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

That I started to wear for a little while. I tried to wear it to church one day. That's where my mom put the. Put the kibosh on it. I think she burned it.

[Kevin Ryan]

I remember my stepdad's dad, we had some of his clothes at the house. And he was alive, which I don't know why we had. We maybe like a storage unit or something. And there was this vest from like the 70s. Sick. It was dark navy blue, white, baby blue. It was just like the cool. Like something super vintage and cool. And it was just like a little too snug on me. And I would try to wear that and it was just like. Because it was like a winter vest, you know what I mean? Like something you'd wear in the winter.

[H. Foley]

Oh, like. Like a Marty McFly vest.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yes, very similar to that. And I just. I was a. I was 15 pounds too fat, man. I'd be a different guy if I got that on. One winner.

[H. Foley]

I tried to wear one of those.

[Kevin Ryan]

Probably prom king.

[H. Foley]

I tried to wear one of those not that long ago. I had a. I had a. Like a winter vest like that.

[Kevin Ryan]

You've taken a lot of swings over the past decade.

[H. Foley]

Yeah, Uniqlo was my lowest moment.

[Kevin Ryan]

That was. You're. That you're the king of. You get something real. Okay. Okay. At best, corny, some would say. And you really try. You create your own narrative. You live in this fantasy land where you tell people. You were telling us. Like, nah, this is from a high end sample sale. Like, you were like, you lie about how I got a friend in fashion. Meanwhile, he was like a security guard.

[H. Foley]

He Stole it?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, he stole it. And you're going, I got a friend in fashion is what. Is what you told me. This is. I had known him for, like, six years, and he's gone. I got a friend in fashion. I go, you don't know anybody. I don't know. I got a friend.

[H. Foley]

I knew a couple people.

[Kevin Ryan]

I mean, dude, you were sleeping on a park bench. All of a sudden, you got a friend in fashion.

[H. Foley]

That was a wacky artist. Yeah, Uniqlo sucked.

[Kevin Ryan]

That was big. I mean, we would go that. Yeah, that was. There was a time when me and you, obviously, no money, but one of us would get a couple of bucks. And I remember, like, I'd go, I'm going to buy some clothes. I had lost weight. And he would meet me there, and it would be like. It would be an outing. And we would go in. We'd go into Uniqlo or Yellow Rat Bastard or whatever, and you couple. It was like. It was. It was like I was Pretty Woman. He'd be like, what about this? And I'd be like, looking at price, I can't do it. 44 for a pair of chinos.

[H. Foley]

We were in here yesterday, and you spit on us and threw us out. Big mistake. All right, 15 bucks on it. Get the three for 20.

[Kevin Ryan]

Three for 20. Yeah, that was all right.

[H. Foley]

Sure. Remember, I looked into Super Dry for a half a second.

[Kevin Ryan]

You were put. You were really going, hey, get something cool. Like, Super Dry.

[H. Foley]

Not gonna fit.

[Kevin Ryan]

Not more like super tight. Okay, ma' am. All right.

[H. Foley]

We stink.

[Kevin Ryan]

Sure. Which is. It was part of our charm, you know what I mean? We've taken our. We've taken our fashion swings. We've struck out.

[H. Foley]

I'm living here from now on.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's Buddy.

[H. Foley]

I'm shorts all summer, too.

[Kevin Ryan]

Okay.

[H. Foley]

Not today.

[Kevin Ryan]

Sure. Went with heavy jeans for today. For some reason.

[H. Foley]

I don't have anywhere on, though.

[Kevin Ryan]

Okay. All right. That.

[H. Foley]

There was nothing clean.

[Kevin Ryan]

We'll get into that on our feelings.

[H. Foley]

You never ran out of underwear enough.

[Kevin Ryan]

Well, save it. Save it. You will be tried in the court of Patreon by friend. All right. This one's from Lippy Kippy. $10, homie. Love you is big. That's a good saying. Love you is big. Is it garbage? I just found out, literally today, that I was a summertime acquaintance of someone that was featured on the show Love During Lockup. She was always at my apartment pool swinging a miss with her boyfriend at the time. And as I would put loosely, we hung out at the pool for, like, two Years in a row. That's a tough life. You're. If you're in a world where you're associating.

[H. Foley]

Wait, what's. What's the show?

[Kevin Ryan]

Love During Lockup. Where they date inmates, they fall in love with inmates, vice versa.

[H. Foley]

What are you on the phone? You get to go see him?

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't know. I would get a run. What am I, a fucking EP on the thing? I don't know. Couples trying to preserve their relationships while one of the partners is incarcerated. It's pretty recent because the first episode was in 2022. Yeah, it's. It's a lot of them. Like, then them getting. I've seen some. I saw Sizzle. Them getting out. And then like you try to make an end. I think on the inside it's easy. It's that Seinfeld episode. Controlled. I had that communication. I can live my own life, blah, blah, just like.

[H. Foley]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

Then you come and it's like.

[H. Foley]

I had a relationship like that. My freshman year of high school. I was girlfriend and boyfriend with this girl. I didn't see her all summer.

[Kevin Ryan]

Who says that I was girlfriend and boyfriend with this girl.

[H. Foley]

I was. I was girlfriend and boyfriend with her.

[Kevin Ryan]

Girlfriend.

[H. Foley]

She was my girlfriend. Sure, theoretically, on paper, but I know we would just talk on the phone every day. She only lived like 10 minutes away. I don't know why I never saw her.

[Kevin Ryan]

I had a few ideas.

[H. Foley]

She was 10 minutes by car. I never got to see her. She went to summer camp near me. It was a day camp.

[Kevin Ryan]

This was one of your buddies talking. As a girl, for sure, you probably got a huge cock, huh? Yeah, no big deal.

[H. Foley]

No, I. Cuz I knew her. I knew her in school.

[Kevin Ryan]

Okay. I don't know why. You're getting oddly weird, okay?

[H. Foley]

We just talk on the phone every day.

[Kevin Ryan]

Well, that was relatively like how me and my wife worked in the beginning. She lives in Germany, I lived here. It's like on Page. You'd go to bed at 6 o' clock, my time. I'm out there meeting you at, you know, Uniqlo, hanging out.

[H. Foley]

Would you guys talk on the phone for long periods of time?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, but there was no. Honestly, there was no real time. I would wake up, she would be at work. Right. I would go to work. Can't do that. I'd call her at lunch for like, you know, half hour, whatever. Sitting there ripping butts out.

[H. Foley]

What would you guys talk about?

[Kevin Ryan]

Just whatever. I mean, what do you have you never. What are you talking about? You just said you talked to a Girl, whenever you talk to a woman in a relationship, we talked about George.

[H. Foley]

My.

[Kevin Ryan]

And how hot he was.

[H. Foley]

I did. He was hot. Sure.

[Kevin Ryan]

We also talked about George Michael.

[H. Foley]

Loved him.

[Kevin Ryan]

No, whatever. Yeah. Life stuff. Whatever's going on at work, blah, blah, blah. Vacations, things we were doing, you know? I don't know. It's so weird that you always ask me that.

[H. Foley]

It's just funny, you talking to a girl.

[Kevin Ryan]

I've been married for seven years. I'm having a kid. I've dated multiple people that you know.

[H. Foley]

It still strikes me funny, the romantic side of you. I'm not the only one that thinks that way.

[Kevin Ryan]

Okay.

[H. Foley]

Your mother finds it strange too.

[Kevin Ryan]

Sure, fair enough. I mean. Yeah, fair enough. It's also funny. Yeah? That you think, like, what are you, like Don Juan or something? Talking to broads?

[H. Foley]

I'm not good.

[Kevin Ryan]

You're no good at talking to anybody socially, let alone romantic.

[H. Foley]

Nah, that's not true.

[Kevin Ryan]

What?

[H. Foley]

I'm great in the room. You know that. Don't say that. I'm good in the room.

[Kevin Ryan]

What room?

[H. Foley]

I don't know. Wherever we're hanging.

[Kevin Ryan]

Okay.

[H. Foley]

It's all fake. It's not the real me.

[Kevin Ryan]

I see. Well, you've lost your fastball.

[H. Foley]

You think so?

[Kevin Ryan]

Huh?

[H. Foley]

Huh?

[Kevin Ryan]

You have.

[H. Foley]

You think I've lost my fastball?

[Kevin Ryan]

As a friend?

[H. Foley]

Socially, yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

You've been out of practice.

[H. Foley]

You think so?

[Kevin Ryan]

Uh huh.

[H. Foley]

You think I've. You don't think I could walk in a room and charm the shit out of everybody?

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't know. Not as much as you used to. I would say you have more. A bigger chance of failing than you used to.

[H. Foley]

Why?

[Kevin Ryan]

Because you're not in practice like you used to be.

[H. Foley]

What do you think I do? I just show my true colors.

[Kevin Ryan]

I think you. You're not always in the right gear sometimes.

[H. Foley]

Hmm. Interesting. I don't know how to feel about that. I think you're wrong.

[Kevin Ryan]

Fair enough.

[H. Foley]

I think I'd still close deals. I don't mean like with a lady.

[Kevin Ryan]

But I don't mean closing Ace.

[H. Foley]

No, I don't mean that. I mean, I think I can, you know, sure. I can carry a conversation with just about anybody.

[Kevin Ryan]

Okay.

[H. Foley]

For 10, 15 minutes. And I'm bored with it.

[Kevin Ryan]

Sir. This bores me too. Do you know George Michael's birthday?

[H. Foley]

I'm gonna go to sleep now.

[Kevin Ryan]

Huh.

[H. Foley]

You think I've lost my fastball comedically?

[Kevin Ryan]

No. Why are you taking it there?

[H. Foley]

I don't know.

[Kevin Ryan]

No, I just think you're not in social settings as much as you Used to be. Which I think is a fair sentence.

[H. Foley]

Put me in a social setting. Hey, Kevin. How are you?

[Kevin Ryan]

What? I throw up. Oh, my God. A celebrity's daughter.

[H. Foley]

Hello, Kevin. You look stupid today. All right, I'll work on it. Work on it this summer where I make good eye contact, right?

[Kevin Ryan]

Sure.

[H. Foley]

Hello?

[Kevin Ryan]

I think he got jaundiced.

[H. Foley]

Really?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

No. You're joking.

[Kevin Ryan]

No.

[H. Foley]

You think I look yellow?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Don't say that.

[Kevin Ryan]

Why?

[H. Foley]

Because I've been. My kidney's been hurting. Okay.

[Kevin Ryan]

You should get to the fucking doctor.

[H. Foley]

You really think I've. I look yellow? Come on, don't screw around.

[Kevin Ryan]

No kidding.

[H. Foley]

Luke. She's goddamn lights.

[Kevin Ryan]

All right, let's get on with it.

[H. Foley]

Drink some water.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's Gatorade.

[H. Foley]

Wrong again. It's my own urine.

[Kevin Ryan]

All right, let's see here. This is very, very food and restaurant heavy, but this is a pretty good one. This is from Eaton Beaver. Damn, they got me again.

[H. Foley]

Eating beavers. All right.

[Kevin Ryan]

I feel like from the Simpsons. They're just getting me, dude.

[H. Foley]

Eating beavers pretty good.

[Kevin Ryan]

I need a man. The hugging kiss. God damn it. Is it garbage? If you knock your utensils off the table at a nice restaurant, but you just kick them under further and act like you've never received them? That is the move. That is that. Or if there's an empty table next.

[H. Foley]

To me, I'll snatch that. No, no, no, no. If you want to piss your server off, you do that. That is the most disrespectful thing you can do in a restaurant is take silverware off a clean table. You ask the server for other. I've seen you silver. Then they got. No, you have not.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yes, I have, dude.

[H. Foley]

Liar.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yes, I have.

[H. Foley]

I am not yellow. I am good in the room, not lost my fastball. I'll wow the pants off of you. I get you in the sack in two seconds, couple of drinks, fucking tell me I lost my fastball. Fucking bullshit. That's the biggest dickhead thing you could do because then that server's got to reset that table.

[Kevin Ryan]

That takes two. Listen, I'm not saying.

[H. Foley]

And that looks bad. And that's something that the managers are gonna come come down and bust in your balls for.

[Kevin Ryan]

Okay, all right. Guy who's not having fun with this at all.

[H. Foley]

You just say, hey, can I get a. Can I get an extraordinary silverware? I've seen you take it off at the Greasy Fingers. Knock over.

[Kevin Ryan]

I've seen you take it.

[H. Foley]

What are you using a knife and fork anyway? You don't need that for chicken fingers or mozzarella sticks? Fat ass. What do you need a fork and knife for your savda. Your diet cake?

[Kevin Ryan]

You eat the same thing all the time.

[H. Foley]

Me usually have a salad. Chicken parm salad.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Kicking under the table. And I'm with that.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. I, I, well, I don't think it's, I think it's more embarrassing to go, I dropped it under the table and my fat ass can't reach it. So you just go, I didn't get one. Oh, weird.

[H. Foley]

Sucks when they hear it and they come over and they start getting in your business.

[Kevin Ryan]

There it's stuck in your gooch. I think it's pronounced. Yeah. Listen, he's gonna say this probably because he got yelled at one time. I think it's, I think it's more of a thing to get them to run while they're doing something else. Oh, excuse me. This is just my point of view. Excuse me. I drop. Now they're not coming over because they either just dropped the food, they dropped the appetizer or whatever. They're not checking in. So I don't get, I have to wait until they come back and then they have to go get me a new roll up. That makes them run to go do something. They wasn't on their schedule already.

[H. Foley]

I'm just telling you.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm also telling you, I get that that's your point of view. I understand.

[H. Foley]

It's not my point of view. It's the point of view of the restaurant business. They would rather have you say, hey, can you grab me another knife and fork? Then take it off a table.

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't think that's.

[H. Foley]

You pull any waiter in the country and I'll tell you the same thing.

[Kevin Ryan]

Okay, I just tend to disagree on that sometimes because a lot of times the hostesses will drop the fucking silverware. You ever been to the last restaurant? I talked about 12 chairs, they dropped the silverware.

[H. Foley]

I've never been to that place.

[Kevin Ryan]

Okay, well, I'm just saying not every op that operates as the same restaurants that you've worked. That I think that's a fair assessment. Okay, just take it. Oh, listen. Okay, then ask the waiter. And then your fat ass waiter comes back with an attitude because you just made him run to go get a new roll up.

[H. Foley]

Why is he heavy set?

[Kevin Ryan]

Because you're the waiter. Listen, you're telling me when you were at Burger, that was the biggest.

[H. Foley]

That pissed me off.

[Kevin Ryan]

That was the biggest. When you were waiting tables, if you had to run to the back of the Kitchen.

[H. Foley]

I'd rather do that to them. Reach over. I would stop them. I'd go over there and be like, do you need some silver? I'll get it for you.

[Kevin Ryan]

With an attitude. There goes. Oh yeah, you're just knocked down to 12. Tip his pulled house suckers dumb.

[H. Foley]

Give a.

[Kevin Ryan]

Anyway, I got one foot out of here.

[H. Foley]

I did. Man. Every once in a while I think about that table at NYU that would. That would always come in. There'd be like 20 of them. And this one dickhead teacher, he would. No matter what, they would come in like. Like individually and they'd all want to order right away. I'm slammed. Fucking lunch shift. Power lunch crowd down there in the village.

[Kevin Ryan]

Power lunch crowd, whatever.

[H. Foley]

And he would. I'd be taking an order from a table and this fucking dickhead would walk up to me and stand next to me and wait till I got done. Can I put my burger in? He was this French guy. He had this huge nose. I wanted to smash it against the bar. I saw him one time crossing the street. I thought about running him over. I swear to God.

[Kevin Ryan]

Insurance wasn't paid up. That had to come out of pocket for the damages.

[H. Foley]

Such a.

[Kevin Ryan]

Sure. Yeah. Listen. Okay then. I stand corrected. Go to the waiter. Have the waiter get the silverware.

[H. Foley]

But kicking it under the table and leaving it there, I'm cool with.

[Kevin Ryan]

Sure. I think you're oddly defensive. Trying to meet you halfway on the Luke, what would you do?

[H. Foley]

You can't ask him. He's a fucking rich man.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm just taking it. Taking a poll with a room. I found this blog. Ask the salty waitress.

[H. Foley]

Okay.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah but she's a bitch. She's. She's a fucking. You know.

[H. Foley]

But she agrees out there.

[Kevin Ryan]

Take it from the table. If it's a busy night. If the waiter just walked away and it's a busy night. She said snatch away. There you go. And she's a bitch. And she's a bitch. What's that make you? There you go. Yeah, she's salty. She's a. She's. She's.

[H. Foley]

Okay, okay, okay. Just don't do it in my section because I'll fuck you up. I'll grab your hand. You need something fatty.

[Kevin Ryan]

Maybe you should contribute to this vlog. The salty waitress. You should.

[H. Foley]

The fat waiter.

[Kevin Ryan]

Listen what you're gonna want to do. Let me quarterback this thing for you.

[H. Foley]

Cooked up fat waiter.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. All right. We gotta wrap it up gang.

[H. Foley]

What a fun one.

[Kevin Ryan]

Uh huh.

[H. Foley]

Gang, we love you to death. Couple of things. Get your tickets to the Back on the Block tour.

[Kevin Ryan]

Second show out in San Francisco.

[H. Foley]

Look at that. All right. But a lot of the cities, we can't add shows because of our schedule.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. So get a water.

[H. Foley]

Hot getaway. They're hot. We love you, and we'll see you next week.

[Kevin Ryan]

Peace.

[H. Foley]

Peace.