Girls Night Out! w/ Kevin Ryan & H. Foley

Summary

Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast
Episode: Girls Night Out! w/ Kevin Ryan & H. Foley
Date: August 28, 2025

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Episode Overview

This is a classic "family episode" of Are You Garbage?, where your favorite self-proclaimed dirtbags, H. Foley and Kevin Ryan, kick it old-school. No guest this week—just the boys, the bozos, and the homies swapping stories, answering Patreon fan questions, and determining what qualifies as truly garbage behavior. The tone is as irreverent and self-deprecating as ever, with tales ranging from botched summer jobs to a deep-dive into childhood turf wars. Expect plenty of nostalgia, working-class Philly flavor, and crowd-sourced trashy dilemmas.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Summer Reflections & Seasonal Transitions

• Kevin shares stories of spending time "down the shore" with his mom, Denise, including a replay of childhood dinner staples—like garlic bread made from stale Amoroso rolls (07:00-09:00).
• The guys argue about when summer really ends, with debates fueled by local school schedules and personal nostalgia for Labor Day rituals (10:02-12:00).

Notable quote:
"Spaghetti, garlic bread, no spaghetti. What am I, nuts?" – Kevin Ryan (09:49)

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2. Trashy Childhood Tales & Neighborhood Turf Wars

• Both reminisce about their working-class upbringings, discussing the nuances of local turf wars, playground rivalries, and the social hierarchy of Philly townhouse complexes (19:33-22:29).

Notable quote:
"It was like the Pagans and the Hell’s Angels, dude." – Kevin Ryan on neighborhood rivalries (20:22)

• The boys confess to being “bad kids to good kids,” not true delinquents, but always mischievous and up to no good (51:01-51:52).

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3. Defining Garbage Behavior: Audience Questions

a) Bragging About Speeding (13:33-17:18)

• Foley and Kevin share youthful stories of hitting 100+ mph in cars driven by barely-sober adults, noting how this “dirtbag quotient” rises with both speed and willingness to recount these acts as grown men.

Notable quote:
"That would be my autobiography: 'My Two Dogs'." – Kevin Ryan on always eating two hot dogs (24:56)

b) Hot Dog Condiment Choices (22:41-27:48)

• The guys discuss whether A1 sauce or “secret sauces” belong on a hot dog. Both admit to being purists, but appreciate the experimentation (with some skepticism).
• Foley reminisces about his childhood A1 obsession but says he’s outgrown it.
  Notable quote:
  “I've lost my taste for A1, which as a kid, I loved…” – H. Foley (25:45)

c) Resourceful (Desperate) Home Hacks (56:19-60:24)

• From dusting with dirty underwear before laundry (56:19) to only having a few working lightbulbs and moving them from lamp to lamp (58:24), the guys establish these as clear garbage moves—but with a certain pride in their ingenuity.

d) Assigned Living Room Seating (63:43–66:00)

• Audience question: Is it trashy to have assigned couch spots and fight over them? The hosts confirm it’s universal, not garbage, and part of growing up in a close family.
  Direct quote:
  "If one of us sat in the other person's spot on the couch..." – Kevin Ryan (63:52)

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4. Memorable Digressions & Deep Cuts

• Unscrupulous rides and paying for gas:
  A listener asks about a friend haggling over gas money and restricting air conditioning. The hosts agree it’s the epitome of being jammed up, though they recall their own days of favor-for-favor rides (42:23-43:33).

• Smoking and early addiction tales:
  The duo recalls youthful cigarette access, buying packs with lunch money, and friends who succumbed early to substance abuse (43:42-47:36).
  Kevin:
  "Dude, we were so young for him to be addicted to pills. Like, so young. Like 15, 14, 15." (48:44)

• Re-gifting Used Clothes:
  Story about a stepmom gifting a cousin’s used Bart Simpson shirt, resulting in a family Christmas blowout (34:07-35:04).

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Notable Quotes & Moments with Timestamps

• On A1 sauce and childhood:
  "I thought kids weren't allowed that…like it had alcohol in it." – Kevin Ryan (26:40)

• On brushing teeth to avoid eating sweets:
  “I respect that move.” – H. Foley (30:14)

• On returning suits post-interview (virtual):
  "How would you know the pants are on during that interview? I've heard sometimes they ask you to stand up." – H. Foley (55:20)

• On laundry habits:
  “Anything, if it’s going in the laundry basket, it’s a rag.” – H. Foley (56:21)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:59-01:46 — Show start, quick banter, podcast status and stats
• 03:19-04:48 — Foley’s US Open summer job serving hot chocolate
• 07:00-09:02 — Trashy dinner combos and garlic bread
• 13:42-16:39 — Bragging about car speed: “You ever brag about how fast you’ve been in a car?”
• 19:33-22:29 — Neighborhood turf wars, mustached kids, and social fears
• 23:01-27:33 — Hot dog condiments, “suspect sauces” and A1 nostalgia
• 42:23-43:33 — Debate about gas money and no-AC rides home
• 43:42-47:36 — Stories of youthful smoking and encountering young addicts
• 58:24-60:24 — Moving light bulbs around the house
• 63:43–66:46 — Assigned seating in the living room & closing banter

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Tone & Style

The dynamic is raw, playful, full of Philly neighborhood vernacular, and unfiltered nostalgia. Both hosts lean into self-deprecation, exchanging jokes about their family’s quirks, bad habits, and trashy traditions—often poking fun at each other’s (and their listeners’) deepest garbage traits, but always with camaraderie.

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Final Verdict

“Are You Garbage?” continues to live up to its promise. This episode gives fans what they love: a hilarious blend of self-aware filth, working-class confessionals, and interactive listener tales that may not be classy—but sure as hell are relatable.

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For First-Time Listeners

You’ll get:

• Unfiltered working-class comedy
• Deep dives into the finer points of “garbage” living
• Audience-driven, crowd-sourced banter
• Zero pretension, 100% authenticity

Skip the ads and intros, get right to the filth—but you’ll probably want to stick around for the laughs.

Transcript

[H. Foley]

I got a question for all you bozos and homies out there. Do you think you're garbage Will come find out. The boys are about to hit the road for that back on the block tour. We're starting out there on the left coast, baby.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. We got San Francisco, Portland, Seattle, Brea. Then we got Burlington, Vermont, Boston, Massachusetts, Atlanta, Charlotte, Raleigh, Richmond, Baltimore, Philadelphia at the Met, Rochester, Toronto. Guys, get your tickets now. These will sell out. We love you. They'll see you on the road.

[H. Foley]

Welcome to another exciting edition of Are you garbage? The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash. Now here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H. Foley. Hey everybody out there and welcome back to everybody's favorite podcast. This is RU. Garbage.

[Kevin Ryan]

Garbage.

[H. Foley]

It's that little show. We sit down with your favorite comedians and we find that at the group to be classy. Look at just a big old piece of trash.

[Kevin Ryan]

Trash, trash, trash.

[H. Foley]

I'm your host, H. Foley. Coming at you on a beautiful day. We're out back here at Tooties in the new edition. I just saw her down at the coffee shop, okay, Working on her new screenplay, coming of age story, okay. About a small large headed boy.

[Kevin Ryan]

Bald.

[H. Foley]

Bald young man. My coast coming at you across the table. Here's what we call a family episode. Just the boys, the bozos and the homies. Just the way we like it. He's my best pal in the whole wide world. He's the king of the burbs. He's the king of the boards. King of the eyebrows. Give it up for kj Kevin, James Ryan everybody.

[Kevin Ryan]

What up gang? Shout out to you as always. Please make sure you rate View subscribe on itunes. Full video available on YouTube. Also full video over there on Spotify. And the boy. Get out your. Get out your ladders. Cause the boys are climbing a charge.

[H. Foley]

35 in comedy 135 top podcast.

[Kevin Ryan]

Is that what you do every morning?

[H. Foley]

That's what I do. You wake up, I check the trades and see what's going on. Variety, where you at? Doing a hit piece on us.

[Kevin Ryan]

Hit piece something. Do a hit piece.

[H. Foley]

What do I gotta do?

[Kevin Ryan]

Ended an episode earlier. He had somewhere to go. He was on a tight schedule.

[H. Foley]

Then obviously the great taking drugs were tanking. Episodes can't get on the list here.

[Kevin Ryan]

Jesus Christ. Hollywood hit me up. The guy had to go. He had to be in Brooklyn by 7. It was 6:30. Okay, obviously the greatest website of all time, www.patreon.com show you garbage. You over. Go over there. You get all that bonus content, gang?

[H. Foley]

Yes, sir.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm not on drug drugs unless you got them.

[H. Foley]

Let's take a quick bite, go down the hall, grab a water, grab a coffee.

[Kevin Ryan]

We gotta pop in and talk to the suits because they're getting shattered out here, huh?

[H. Foley]

Take a walk by the corner office. There he is. Fresh back from the Hamptons, this guy.

[Kevin Ryan]

Hamptons, Connecticut?

[H. Foley]

Yeah. U.S. open. You went to it all, huh?

[Kevin Ryan]

You guys should try it sometime. Buddy, I'm in. Getting fucking walloped out here.

[H. Foley]

Did you have one of those melon balls over at the U.S. open?

[Kevin Ryan]

No, I didn't go. My girl went. I told you.

[H. Foley]

Who was she there with? Andy Roddick or something like that? A good looking kid.

[Kevin Ryan]

Everyone went.

[H. Foley]

Every. Everybody goes out there. Saw Spike Lee was out there.

[Kevin Ryan]

You guys gotta take me to cooler places.

[H. Foley]

I worked there one year.

[Kevin Ryan]

You take us to. We stink.

[H. Foley]

Yeah. What?

[Kevin Ryan]

He can take us to the restaurant he used to work at and I can get you on a roof of antiac. Me in the Tri State?

[H. Foley]

Nah, the joint closed, Snack. The Vernac closed, sadly. Great restaurant in the West Village. Shout out to it. Things are changing. What are you gonna do? Yeah, I worked there one year at the US Open. I was supposed to get a cushy job working down on the floor at like the fucking Lowenbrow or the. The Heineken bar. And they fucking stuck me up in the nosebleeds. I was serving hot chocolates in the summer with criminals.

[Kevin Ryan]

Jesus Christ.

[H. Foley]

They would come and check our drawer like every five minutes, make sure nobody was stealing.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's a tough seller.

[H. Foley]

It was a cold Sunday and I only did it once. Then I bitched at the kid that gave me the job. He's like, what the fuck? I offered you a job. You told me you guys gonna be down fucking working on a Heineken floor. My buddy got me the job. Bitched at him too.

[Kevin Ryan]

He bitched a lot of people. I'm picking up.

[H. Foley]

Yeah, it was a chilly night. And then fucking one dickhead, fucking probably one of his parents, friends or something like that, comes upstairs and says, hey, let me get a hot chocolate. It's a chilly night. Then all of a sudden it became the thing. All the rich people were coming up to get the hot chocolate. I'm having a hot chocolate too. Fucking dump it.

[Kevin Ryan]

Give me all.

[H. Foley]

Blackjack. Your husband. Take your wallet, lady. Out of my face.

[Kevin Ryan]

Hey, everybody. You ever been with a dude with the. From the wrong side of the track.

[H. Foley]

I got hard real quick.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. Ever been with a guy with no upper teeth. Why don't you come back to my place in Astoria? It's pretty close.

[H. Foley]

I didn't live in Astoria at the time. I was in Sunnyside.

[Kevin Ryan]

Oh, wow.

[H. Foley]

By myself.

[Kevin Ryan]

Even closer.

[H. Foley]

Fucking guy is coming up. Give me the fucking Mirani. About to roll your. Straighten your ass, kid. I was working with my only friend. Somebody did get busted stealing. It was all cash.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. What are you talking to?

[H. Foley]

It's like the Lufthansa High School before computer.

[Kevin Ryan]

You can walk out with 400 grand, no one know. Just stealing hot chocolates. You bring a thermos to work, dressed.

[H. Foley]

Up like a co.

[Kevin Ryan]

You're dressed up like a tennis player.

[H. Foley]

Ronnie, I'll meet you back at the rendezvous.

[Kevin Ryan]

What?

[H. Foley]

I just met you, dude. Say, had a nice weekend then, huh?

[Kevin Ryan]

Lovely. Prick.

[H. Foley]

I love you, buddy. Rich, you never brought me any of that fruit. You're going to that fancy fruit stand out there in Long Island.

[Kevin Ryan]

Round Swamp.

[H. Foley]

Yeah. You never brought the watermelon.

[Kevin Ryan]

Looked delicious.

[H. Foley]

You don't bring me strawberries or nothing. Could have took some of them strawberry seeds in them. Are rich people strawberries. Plant your own. That's how you get in there.

[Kevin Ryan]

What a dirt bag. Take rich people strawberries, plant the seeds. Just fucking buy. What are you doing now?

[H. Foley]

You get them delivered from Japan. They don't send you the seeds. They take all the seeds out of the strawberries. Because they know that's what you're going to do. And they don't want you to fucking start. Open up your own operation. And when you keep getting fucking hammered up in fucking Shanghai. There's a lot of fruit like that.

[Kevin Ryan]

Okay. What the fuck?

[H. Foley]

Never had a pink pineapple.

[Kevin Ryan]

No.

[H. Foley]

You gotta come down to the Lollipop Club with me. You gotta come. You gotta come down Eastville and see Rudy.

[Kevin Ryan]

Get up. I went to dance.

[H. Foley]

I can't stop doing that. All right, let's quit screwing around here. Family episodes. Pinhead. Questions. Go.

[Kevin Ryan]

Okay. You're lucky. I was. As you know, I was down the shore this past weekend hanging out with Denise. Right. The piece and she did. Old staple of my childhood. We made. We had as a. As a. As a portion of dinner.

[H. Foley]

Really. Hold on. Can I guess it?

[Kevin Ryan]

Sure.

[H. Foley]

Now you're a picky eater.

[Kevin Ryan]

Sure.

[H. Foley]

Larger boy.

[Kevin Ryan]

Bit of a fitness. Yeah.

[H. Foley]

The middle slices of a loaf of white bread.

[Kevin Ryan]

I mean, you're. You're in the world.

[H. Foley]

You ever take them?

[Kevin Ryan]

It's a carbohydrate.

[H. Foley]

You ever take him and boil them up?

[Kevin Ryan]

Oh, man. Nothing was better than a Strowman.

[H. Foley]

Yeah. All crushed up, man. Why was that? So it's weird that we did that.

[Kevin Ryan]

I know it turns after a while it turns into a jawbreaker. You know when your tongue eating that. Trying to lick that thing.

[H. Foley]

See a sparrow try to eat that.

[Kevin Ryan]

She had a bag of amaranth. What?

[H. Foley]

What?

[Kevin Ryan]

Just burp through twice baked potatoes.

[H. Foley]

Excuse me, I apologize. Look at that.

[Kevin Ryan]

That sour cream's working overtime.

[H. Foley]

I was going to say you think.

[Kevin Ryan]

About food and get affected by it.

[H. Foley]

Think about turkey.

[Kevin Ryan]

I get sleepy.

[H. Foley]

I was thinking twice baked potato. Nah, she had amoroso rolls.

[Kevin Ryan]

We had amoroso. She had amoros. A bag of this bag. You know what is it? Probably like eight. The bag of eight. The small little banger.

[H. Foley]

I know, club roles, right? Yeah. I'm just saying the footballs. Calm footballs.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. They're not football shape. They're little snub nose. John. Yeah, yeah, whatever.

[H. Foley]

About three inches, four inches?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, Depends. Soft, hard.

[H. Foley]

Let's go.

[Kevin Ryan]

You got a bag of them because she had a party.

[H. Foley]

Garlic bread. She made garlic bread with them because they were.

[Kevin Ryan]

They were kind of stale. They were like not good enough for. Because you know you're talking. The party was eight days from dinner. So them, they're. I don't know when she bought them, when they got put in the bag, when they came out of the oven. But it's well over a week. So they weren't good for a Sammy.

[H. Foley]

I mean, listen, toast them and that's.

[Kevin Ryan]

Fucking threw them in the oven.

[H. Foley]

Little butter.

[Kevin Ryan]

A little butter. Garlic.

[H. Foley]

Garlic salt. Garlic. Garlic powder. Yeah, she did.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, Garlic and onion powder.

[H. Foley]

I think she's a good girl. Early 2000s. Nobody's got time to fucking mince.

[Kevin Ryan]

It took me chop. That's crazy. It took me bad. The smell. I came out of the shower, I might as well been in eighth grade going to Mr. Feeny. Mr. Mr. Feeny's social studies class.

[H. Foley]

Just those in a little spaghetti sauce and I'm good with a coke.

[Kevin Ryan]

It was hot. Let's go, dude. Because the inside don't get cooked. God damn, man. Just brown.

[H. Foley]

What else did you have? Just that.

[Kevin Ryan]

I just. I just had that in a baked potato.

[H. Foley]

A baked potato.

[Kevin Ryan]

I had the baby. I was on baby duty.

[H. Foley]

Did you really have a baked potato?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, I had a piece of chicken too.

[H. Foley]

Wait, hold on. So it was chicken, a baked potato.

[Kevin Ryan]

And garlic bread and some vegetables? Yeah.

[H. Foley]

It's a weird dish. Yeah, it was kind of weird ensemble.

[Kevin Ryan]

Okay. I mean it's not that crazy. Spaghetti.

[H. Foley]

Garlic bread, no spaghetti. What am I nuts?

[Kevin Ryan]

I mean. Okay. Remove the garlic bread. It's a normal thing. I think she made the garlic bread because it was just to get. To get rid of the. You got to get rid of the bread. End of the summer, you can't throw off fucking six amoroso rolls.

[H. Foley]

You know, everybody kept saying that, that last weekend was the last.

[Kevin Ryan]

Everybody. Three guys you talked to.

[H. Foley]

I talked to a lot of people. Yes, I did. At an active weekend.

[Kevin Ryan]

Okay.

[H. Foley]

Fitness wise and socially. Last weekend. Everybody said last weekend was the last weekend of the summer. It's not. This weekend coming up is the last weekend of the summer.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. I just think for a lot of people, like, school started.

[H. Foley]

School.

[Kevin Ryan]

Like, my sister's a teacher.

[H. Foley]

I hear you fucking typing over there. You fucking backstabbing. Actually, it's.

[Kevin Ryan]

I think it was the last week. And a lot of people.

[H. Foley]

I know why I'm giving you shit.

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't know why. Yeah, relax. Jesus fucking Christ.

[H. Foley]

Good kid.

[Kevin Ryan]

A lot of people said it's the last weekend people could go away, kids start school again.

[H. Foley]

Right.

[Kevin Ryan]

Like, my nephew's in private school. He's not private in Catholic school. He went back already. So a lot of this. A lot of the Catholic schools in Philadelphia area are back. So you have no one's archdiocese. The archdiocese.

[H. Foley]

No kidding. Huh. I know a lot of people that are going down ashore this weekend.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, I don't. Listen, these aren't steadfast rules. I just think, you know, a lot of people were like, I can't go down the shore anymore. The kids are back in full swing. They got school. No, but listen, I did that one year, I think, where we went away Monday or Sunday, and then on Monday, that's like going from vacation to school the next day. Might as easy. Like fucking eating too much turkey.

[H. Foley]

I never could.

[Kevin Ryan]

Sunburton school sucks.

[H. Foley]

I never could go. Okay, football camp.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Labor Day night. We'd all meet at the. At the field, kiss each other.

[Kevin Ryan]

No, it'd be the end of the offense versus defense. If you catch right drifts, run a nine man scrimmage. Nine on nine shirts versus buttholes.

[H. Foley]

It was the end of summer camp and end of camp. Football camp.

[Kevin Ryan]

Do you think we want to hear this fucking high school war story?

[H. Foley]

It's not a war story. We just. We'd run the whole field. We'd go from like the.

[Kevin Ryan]

So it's a story where you look cool in high school?

[H. Foley]

No, we'd run from one end zone to the other and then we'd just keep going.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. You call each other's buttholes. Take it to the end zone.

[H. Foley]

Go for two. All right, whatever.

[Kevin Ryan]

No, no, please continue.

[H. Foley]

That's it.

[Kevin Ryan]

You just want to do that? You ran from one end zone to the other. We'd meet up on the field as an unspoken bond.

[H. Foley]

No, I just couldn't go down ashore.

[Kevin Ryan]

Because you had to run 100 yards.

[H. Foley]

It was. You had practice. You had practice the night before school started. School started on Tuesday. Labor Day's on a Monday, right?

[Kevin Ryan]

Think so. Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Yeah. So we'd all meet up. That Monday. Would not meet up. We're talking about practice.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. You're saying meet up. I don't know.

[H. Foley]

With practice. We ought to be there.

[Kevin Ryan]

Spent way too much time on one football practice. That was 42 years ago. All right, everybody. No one cares. We know you play football. It's okay. We're proud of you. I'm still proud of you that you played football.

[H. Foley]

Thank you.

[Kevin Ryan]

I just don't need to hear about it.

[H. Foley]

Shooting a movie in the fall to play gay porn. Hey, that's this weekend.

[Kevin Ryan]

All right. That's neither here nor there, gang. We got a gosh darn family episode on our hands. As you know, when you join the old Patreon, you get to ask your garbage question. This one's. I don't know if we've ever hit the nail on the head with this. We've talked about this. This is a great name. Jehovah thickness. You ever brag about how fast you've been in a car That's a dirt bag?

[H. Foley]

Got it about 110.

[Kevin Ryan]

I remember the one we hit. We hit 104 when I was too young. I was a kid.

[H. Foley]

Scare you.

[Kevin Ryan]

And my dad's friend was a union delegate and he had a. He had a Cadillac through the union. He's an adult. Yeah. And he had it.

[H. Foley]

That's crazy.

[Kevin Ryan]

He had a white Cadillac. I don't know. Something and I never. This is the first time.

[H. Foley]

Like a Big Boy or like a newer one?

[Kevin Ryan]

Big new. It was brand new because it had a digital speedometer. And this is probably like 92.

[H. Foley]

No, but like, it didn't look like a. Like an El Dorado or something?

[Kevin Ryan]

No, it was like a big New. I don't know what they would have been. Find out what they were. What Cadillac they were making in the 90s. It was a big.

[H. Foley]

It was like that new. That newer model type, I guess.

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't remember.

[H. Foley]

Not like a Coupe de Ville.

[Kevin Ryan]

No, it was like a big. I don't know. I guess the equivalent now would be like the sts. They had they made for a while. Deville and Fleetwood, it seems like.

[H. Foley]

Because those new Cadillacs are pretty nice. The ones that look like regular sedans.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's the st. That was the ST.

[H. Foley]

One Pauly Walnuts drove. Didn't he drive something like that?

[Kevin Ryan]

That was the STS and the cts. CTS was more the coop. The STS was. That's what it looked like. The bigger. I guess this is early 90s Fleetwood.

[H. Foley]

I wouldn't say big compared to a Cadillac. Cadillacs fucking huge. An old Cadillacs huge.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. Whatever. I don't have. I don't have the dimensions of a 1970.

[H. Foley]

Wouldn't refer to it as big. That's.

[Kevin Ryan]

It was a big car.

[H. Foley]

Okay.

[Kevin Ryan]

It was because there was like five of us in the backseat jumping around chicks and go on our way to football practice.

[H. Foley]

That's what I'm talking about.

[Kevin Ryan]

And he hit like a hundred. And I mean, I remember the digital speedometer going up.

[H. Foley]

And he must have been.

[Kevin Ryan]

I was so. And then all the kids were jumping and I wanted to be like, where is my dad at? This is.

[H. Foley]

He wasn't with you?

[Kevin Ryan]

No, we were driving back a guy probably had a couple of beers in him too.

[H. Foley]

Wow.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

That's crazy.

[Kevin Ryan]

I mean, nighttime, I'm driving with this guy. Shout out. Great guy. Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Ours was probably 110 on the Atlantic City Expressway. Coming back from the shore. Older buddy of ours, Rip, was driving fucked up. Fucked up. Drinking Gatorade.

[Kevin Ryan]

Never good.

[H. Foley]

Gatorade and vodka out of a Gatorade squeeze bottle. Got up to about 110 for about 10 seconds. He was immediately hit like a screech. So he didn't kill us. Pull over, swapped him out.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. Yeah. Now there's a thing. I think like in most. You get around the $90. Like there's something in the human. In most humans bodies where you're like 90, I start freaking out where you're like. It just. The things are moving quicker than you. Like you're. It's. It starts to get.

[H. Foley]

But it's funny and like the Jeep, you get to 83 on the jersey Turnpike.

[Kevin Ryan]

It's.

[H. Foley]

It's nothing.

[Kevin Ryan]

I know. Steering smoother now. Yeah. Cruising. That is a dirt bag. That. To know that. To know and brag about it. For sure. I respect it.

[H. Foley]

Did you ever freak out when you were driving fast? When somebody was driving fast?

[Kevin Ryan]

I mean, I've done it in the van when Ryan D. Was driving where I'm like, dude. He was like. I was like, dude. I'm like, dude, there's no, he hit the. We were going too fast. He had the brakes pretty quick. I was like, hey, man, there's no reason we needed to be doing 88 miles an hour. Fucking end up back on an off trip.

[H. Foley]

Yeah, Kim, you know about this pretty litter?

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't. Please inform me about pretty litter. Yeah, of course I know about pretty litter, but tell the folks out there.

[H. Foley]

Well, you're not a kitty cat man. I'm a kitty cat man. I got a nice kitty cat at home. I got a nice cat at home for all my cat people out there. I know you hate hearing me say kitty cat, but that's what I got is a kitty cat at home. And she loves her pretty litter. It's the best litter on the market. I'm gonna give you a few reasons why.

[Kevin Ryan]

Hit me.

[H. Foley]

One. First and foremost, the crystals. It's all about the crystals.

[Kevin Ryan]

Silica gels.

[H. Foley]

Cat is a urinary tract infection or something like that. Gives you a little warning that doesn't diagnose it, but it just gives you a heads up. Hey, get the cat down to the vet, see what's going on.

[Kevin Ryan]

Check under the hood.

[H. Foley]

That's number one. Number two, lasts for a month. Fantastic. Smells great. You wouldn't even know there was a kitty cat in my house. Which sometimes she does sneak out.

[Kevin Ryan]

Right now you can save 20% on your first order and get a free cat toy. What? @prettylitter.com garbage that's prettylittleitter.com garbage. Save 20% on your first order and get a free cat toy. Pretty litter.com garbage. Pretty litter cannot detect every feline health issue or prevent or diagnose diseases. A diagnosis can only come from a licensed veterinarian. Obviously, terms and conditions apply. See the cipher details?

[H. Foley]

Dead do it. I freaked out one. I told you that I would tell you the Jack Wagner story. Yeah, my cousins went to Jack Wagner. My mom was driving. I was 12 years old. There was like five of us in the backseat and she started. My mom started chasing the van that he was in through the parking lot at the Valley Forge Convention Center. Yeah, doing like fucking 60 miles an hour to get him. Everybody was smoking. I freaked out. Ruined the night.

[Kevin Ryan]

Pull over.

[H. Foley]

Oh, really? Killer dumb. She did.

[Kevin Ryan]

It's like a 30 for 30. The Jack Wagner story.

[H. Foley]

He's a big star. At the time, you wouldn't know.

[Kevin Ryan]

You better not crash. I got football meet up in the morning.

[H. Foley]

No, it was before I played football. I wasn't doing crying in high school. I was probably like 12 or 11 when this happened.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's way cooler. Yeah, I was smoking cigs at 12. You were. You were chasing down a soap opera star to blow him.

[H. Foley]

No, I would stop saying that.

[Kevin Ryan]

She was. No, my mom's chasing them down for an auto. No one's doing 60 to get an autograph.

[H. Foley]

Trying to get some of that dick. My mom. No, my mom was. She was doing it for my cousins, okay? They're respectable ladies.

[Kevin Ryan]

I didn't say anything.

[H. Foley]

And some of her friends were there. I feel like they never let me live it down.

[Kevin Ryan]

A lot of tube tops, huh? Simpler.

[H. Foley]

Shout out to Gina and the girl.

[Kevin Ryan]

This one, Sir Melly Mel. He's ever had a turf war with another neighborhood kid. Oh, my God, dude, so bad. What? Growing up, there was a spot down the road near a canal that we always hung out at. Until one day a random new kid just showed up and tried to assert his dominance. It got ugly. Words were exchanged. I ended up spitting on him and ran away on my bike.

[H. Foley]

Oh, man. Nothing like a good spitting ride.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, we had it. There was like a basin and beyond. There's a basin behind us. And there was the kids on that street whose house is backed up to, like, the basin. On the one side, our house is backed up. On the other, not mine, but across the street from me, backed up and.

[H. Foley]

Retention pond or whatever.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. And you didn't cross that. And if you did, and they call you. It was like the Pagans in the fucking. It was like the Hell's Angels in the Outlaws, dude. It was fucking.

[H. Foley]

Really?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Wait, the house you're in now that she's in now.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, but like, not her side. Like, across it was where like two sections of the neighborhood backed up to each other. And we didn't really know them kids. And they were older. They were more like my brother's age.

[H. Foley]

Sure.

[Kevin Ryan]

Tough kids. Yeah, they were tough kids that were tough at a young age. You're like, that kid's like eight and you're like, hey, takes boxing lessons. You're like, boxing lessons? What the Jesus Christ? Any kid that wore a wife beater was tough.

[H. Foley]

Had that little mustache. Foreman.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. And you're like. You're nine and a half.

[H. Foley]

It's like a 12 year old that has BO. You're like, damn, your pheromones are pumping, dog.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm fat as shit. Balling up amoroso bread.

[H. Foley]

Smell like an angel, though. We had three tiers of townhouse communities in our area. We had Townline, which. Which is pretty south. Then you had Meadowick, which is A little bit worse as far as the quality of children running around. Then you had Whit Payne Hills, which was fucking up the highway. And man, like, the sign was falling down. This was fucking single parent city. Domestic violence boulevard. Those kids were tough as nails.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Scary.

[Kevin Ryan]

Say things like, you couldn't walk a mile in my shoes.

[H. Foley]

I wouldn't even go in there, dude. You had to ride your bike up, up, skip back pike to get there. It's a fucking petrifying dude. Hey, we're gonna go play football against the kids from Whitbane Hills. Like, no, the word I got. Covet.

[Kevin Ryan]

That.

[H. Foley]

Yeah. They come rolling into town, everybody scatter like deadwood.

[Kevin Ryan]

It's like Omar coming in.

[H. Foley]

It's funny. He got shot by a little kid.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. That's the brilliance of it.

[H. Foley]

Did that kid ever get it?

[Kevin Ryan]

He's like, what? I don't know. The show ended.

[H. Foley]

That was the end of the show.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. I think Omar died in the last episode or second to like, that was. That was the bow on. Also goes to show, like anybody.

[H. Foley]

It's the streets, right?

[Kevin Ryan]

Anybody can get.

[H. Foley]

Tell me told you about the football practice. Couldn't get on the shore for labor day. You tell me about hard times, what it's like.

[Kevin Ryan]

All right, let's see here. This one's from Casey. $10 KB Junior Diaper Buyer. Never have one read it. Shout out to you. Is it garbage to put a one on a hot dog? Huh? I've only ever sauced, like, proper sauced up a dog. One time, this guy Sam used to work with my dad. He was from South Carolina. Knew his way around the grill.

[H. Foley]

Okay.

[Kevin Ryan]

Had Sam's secret sauce.

[H. Foley]

Who's Sam's secret sauce?

[Kevin Ryan]

What do you mean, who's Sam? He was Sam.

[H. Foley]

Oh, he was Sam.

[Kevin Ryan]

And his secret sauce was something.

[H. Foley]

You made it sound like it was like, you know, nationwide.

[Kevin Ryan]

No, I did not. I said his. He was Sam and he had Sam's secret sauce.

[H. Foley]

What was it?

[Kevin Ryan]

His secret doesn't tell my fat ass. Although he put it on hot dogs, and I was very, very skeptical.

[H. Foley]

Is it like a ketchup? Was it like a mustard? Was it like a steak sauce?

[Kevin Ryan]

Secret sauce is a mustard.

[H. Foley]

That's crazy mustardy.

[Kevin Ryan]

No, it was more of like. It was a. Like a barbecue red sauce.

[H. Foley]

Okay.

[Kevin Ryan]

It was a leg liquidy, but he.

[H. Foley]

Put probably just everything mixed together.

[Kevin Ryan]

Why are you hating on this? I'm not as a guy.

[H. Foley]

I'm just saying as a guy, it's all just everything mixed together. Probably a little bit of a one A little bit of ketchup, a little bit of mustard.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's what sauce is. I mean, no one's like, cracking fucking atoms and making new sauces over here. It's all just shit put together.

[H. Foley]

There's new sauces.

[Kevin Ryan]

Why do you not like this?

[H. Foley]

I didn't say it in like.

[Kevin Ryan]

Are you jealous that I haven't had Henry sauce? There's something. You're taking it personal.

[H. Foley]

I would have put little slits in the hot dog so the flavor spiralized them.

[Kevin Ryan]

That was the first time. And listen, I didn't like that. He tried that, and I was not a fan.

[H. Foley]

But he turned you.

[Kevin Ryan]

Well, he had made a stack of dogs with the stuff on them. And I said, you. I'm a dry diesel kind of guy around here. You're new here. All right. Dry dogs.

[H. Foley]

Hey, Steve. Whatever your name is, Steve.

[Kevin Ryan]

In your new song. And he then put some. Like. He did one or two non.

[H. Foley]

He.

[Kevin Ryan]

Dry dogs.

[H. Foley]

Dogs.

[Kevin Ryan]

But they were on the same plate and they got a little soft, and I didn't like it. But there's only two dry ones, so I'm like, all right, man, you gotta get two. I gotta have my two dogs. My two dogs. That would be. That would be my autobiography.

[H. Foley]

My two Dogs. You like?

[Kevin Ryan]

This is a stack of dogs in front of someone. Make that.

[H. Foley]

It's always two, right? Two dogs.

[Kevin Ryan]

It's two dogs. I mean, I'll do a three piece.

[H. Foley]

No, no, no, please.

[Kevin Ryan]

Oh, yeah. No one's. I'm not doing one above.

[H. Foley]

Yeah, yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

Minimum. Two dogs.

[H. Foley]

Yeah, minimum at the table. $2.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, yeah.

[H. Foley]

Break that up any way you want. Put it on the outside, the inside. However.

[Kevin Ryan]

Two dog minimum at my table. Make sure you dip your dealers.

[H. Foley]

So then you got into the sauce.

[Kevin Ryan]

And I got it. Well, yeah, that was the only time I really had it. It's tough to get. I mean, you do the chili, whatever. That's not like a sauce, per se, but, yeah. It was the only time a man blew my tits back. I walked out, I said, sam, you got something going here. I said, what? Foley thinks.

[H. Foley]

I hate to say this. I've. And I've had it recently to try to rekindle something. I've lost my taste for A one, which as a kid, I loved it as a kid. Me and my brother was huge. A1. Guys go to the concerts, went to videos, the whole nine yard. We loved A one. We used to take frozen hamburgers and a pan in the summer and doused them in A one and cook them like that. Like make a Salisbury steak with just the A1 sauce.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's crazy to me. To me, A1 sauce was such a grown up thing. Really? That was tangy. A kid. A kid doing A one sauce was wild.

[H. Foley]

We loved. Did my brother put it on burgers, mashed potatoes, everything.

[Kevin Ryan]

I get it. I'm just saying, like, in my head, that was like. That was for myself.

[H. Foley]

A cup of coffee with dinner too, though.

[Kevin Ryan]

Sure. That was like a. That was for my stepdad on special occasion. That wasn't like a daily sauce.

[H. Foley]

No, always.

[Kevin Ryan]

I thought kids weren't allowed that they went, yeah, that's like. I mean, I got alcohol in it. Yeah, something like that. Yeah. No, that's wild. No one's ever been like, you want A1 sauce? What?

[H. Foley]

A1 sauce.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm out of age. I'm just a little boy.

[H. Foley]

I'm in high school, lady. A1 and Heinz 57 sauce was huge in our house.

[Kevin Ryan]

Huge.

[H. Foley]

But now the steak sauce has gotten a little sweeter at, you know, places. So my tongue is now bigger than ever. Yeah, whatever. I read the comments.

[Kevin Ryan]

Me too. He had to leave.

[H. Foley]

And now I can't. I can't do A one anymore. Just. It's something on a hot dog, though.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm okay. I wouldn't want too much. I would just. I would need to like line the bun with it or so just one part of the bun to get the flavor. When the dog gets too. It's too much. Same thing. I'm the same thing with any sort of condiment on a dog. Same thing with a burger.

[H. Foley]

A1 makes you think of ground round. For some reason, I feel like their burgers had like that steak sauce flavoring to them or something.

[Kevin Ryan]

I can't recall.

[H. Foley]

Love the smell of a ground round on the outside coming in on a cool winter's day or a nice fall evening pulling in the parking lot of a ground round. Smell them char. Burl. Char Broiled burgers. You charbro them burgers.

[Kevin Ryan]

Listen, my kid's outside. He's a big fat ass. You better try bro your burger. Name one dog.

[H. Foley]

How's that? How my father speaks.

[Kevin Ryan]

Is there anyone here my wife can blow? Hey, is there any local celebrity?

[H. Foley]

Told you she getting her getting. She getting her knees replaced.

[Kevin Ryan]

I mean, I might suppose it not to make that joke.

[H. Foley]

Should be back in action.

[Kevin Ryan]

All right, this one's from Wilkes Barbarian.

[H. Foley]

Love it.

[Kevin Ryan]

Are you garbage. If your aunt was a ball girl for the local Triple A team and you remember that every game you went with her, you got to ride home with a Player from the opposing team because after she dropped you off you she had to give him a ride to his hotel because he missed the team bus. I did get a lot of free game balls autographed by various Toledo Mud hens in the 88 to 89 season. Whoa. Holy heck.

[H. Foley]

Talk about knee replacement.

[Kevin Ryan]

Listen, that is a good gig. If that's if for the. For abroad like that. If that's what she's doing. I'm not here to judge. I'm not here to shame.

[H. Foley]

It's the fucking 80s.

[Kevin Ryan]

Think about that. Dude. There's no. This is the only remembrance that she.

[H. Foley]

Was probably a good looking lady. Players are probably, you know, good looking dudes back then. Man's men. That's the way it was back then.

[Kevin Ryan]

She was probably single, in her mid 20. Whatever though 50s. Whatever. I mean if this kids she's younger but what do you know the new guy every week. Every week. Maybe it is.

[H. Foley]

It doesn't mean that anything happened. They could have just went to the bar, had a drink.

[Kevin Ryan]

Man.

[H. Foley]

Involving the kid though.

[Kevin Ryan]

He's dropping them off first.

[H. Foley]

Dropping them off? They don't make him wait in the car in a hotel.

[Kevin Ryan]

Huh?

[H. Foley]

They made me do a Jack Wagner. I mean sit down in the lobby for an hour. I kid.

[Kevin Ryan]

Ouch. This one's just wild. This was one from a Wolf Tail McGee. Is it garbage to brush your teeth when you want something sweet but you're too broke to buy anything?

[H. Foley]

I respect that move.

[Kevin Ryan]

Well that's I guess that scratches the.

[H. Foley]

Itch and not even where does it prevent the Prevents it sometimes just go.

[Kevin Ryan]

Like I now I can't eat anything. I. I can't do anything.

[H. Foley]

Brush your teeth. That's a.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's why that's pretty good.

[H. Foley]

I've heard somebody that was in shape does that they brush their teeth because.

[Kevin Ryan]

Then you don't want to eat.

[H. Foley]

Yeah right.

[Kevin Ryan]

Nothing's good.

[H. Foley]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

Whoa.

[H. Foley]

Some guy that does it after lunch or something like that. So they don't eat sweets or anything like that. Yeah. Because I prefer.

[Kevin Ryan]

What this just in ladies and gentlemen. Clear the floor in the morning.

[H. Foley]

I prefer to brush my teeth after I have my breakfast.

[Kevin Ryan]

Oh 100%. I don't brush my teeth till I leave the house. I'm getting ready to leave the house. Yeah, I like my coffee.

[H. Foley]

I learned that from grade school.

[Kevin Ryan]

What do you mean?

[H. Foley]

Fucking brushing my teeth when I'm upstairs then coming down to fucking put. Trying to put down a fucking sunny.

[Kevin Ryan]

D. You're getting in your mom's face. Fall out that get you.

[H. Foley]

Kills it.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. No I never. I'm always. I mean I think I used to brush my teeth going to school downstairs like in the pal. Like the first floor bathroom. I think we used to keep it because we'd eat breakfast and then like as you're walking out, you know, get a good scrub, a dub dub. Yeah. If I'm not leaving the house, I don't get street ready. I ain't showering, I ain't brushing. I ain't doing nothing really.

[H. Foley]

So long as you're going to brushing.

[Kevin Ryan]

Your teeth, would you say not a couple. I mean if it's a couple days, I'm like sick. It would. I. I don't know. I don't have it documented but like I brush them in the morning, go to bed drunk. I'm not brushing them drunk.

[H. Foley]

Sure.

[Kevin Ryan]

Wake up hungover and I'm just couching it. Mm. Getting. I haven't done this in a long time. Juice, bacon, egg, getting everything delivered or running right out getting it and coming back up and eating and going back to bed like a little rat. Yeah. Yeah. You never saw me maybe to the next morning if I'm like proper. That's like if my wife's away. We're not record. I'm not doing spa. I'm not. I'm not leaving the house except to go get more food. Like I like it.

[H. Foley]

I respect it.

[Kevin Ryan]

Rolling in my. My tumbleweed of brown paper bags and tin foil sandwich rolls.

[H. Foley]

Making a nest out of sandwich wrappers. You always put Brillo pads all around the place so you can't get through the holes.

[Kevin Ryan]

Little rat. I said only doing. She's not there. That would. That wouldn't fly with her. I lean in for a smooch and she hits you with a. Get the hell out of here.

[H. Foley]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

I mean if I'm. Yeah. Kick. I do the same thing. Stiff on. I give her the Heisman. What? You make it sound like you've never had bad breath because you haven't brushed your teeth in the morning.

[H. Foley]

Very bad.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, I know.

[H. Foley]

Very bad. Might have a bad tooth.

[Kevin Ryan]

Listen, I've seen them. There's no good teeth in there.

[H. Foley]

That's not true.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's a hundred.

[H. Foley]

Got big lips.

[Kevin Ryan]

None of your teeth are good. Oh God. Some DSLs.

[H. Foley]

What's DSLs?

[Kevin Ryan]

Lips.

[H. Foley]

This guy. Maybe another question.

[Kevin Ryan]

Maybe that's why you're hit with the boys. Your teeth are so small. Just saying.

[H. Foley]

What are you just saying?

[Kevin Ryan]

I just said it. I don't know how else to say it. They like you because Your teeth don't get in the way when you're fellating them. Tight lip. Susie, over here. Jack Wagner.

[H. Foley]

Big star back in the day. Big star now.

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't think so.

[H. Foley]

Whatever. Everybody always says that all. What happened to so and so? They got rich. And they're chilling.

[Kevin Ryan]

All right, this one's from Sean 10 New Homie. Is it garbage if your stepmom gifted your brother your cousin's used Bart Simpson shirt for Christmas? P.S. our cousin was there, called her out, and she threw the shirt in his face and stormed out.

[H. Foley]

What the fuck?

[Kevin Ryan]

Wait, so your stepmom stole your cousin's shirt and gave it to your brother? What the hell? Dude, that is like. That's like being on perks.

[H. Foley]

And like there's drugs involved in that.

[Kevin Ryan]

Sure.

[H. Foley]

I don't know if it's Percocet, something. Something that comes with a prescription that ain't over the counter stuff. Unless it's a bunch of things mixed together and cooked somewhere.

[Kevin Ryan]

Okay. Sudafed.

[H. Foley]

They gotta spell it out for you special. Yeah, that's fucking get mad about. Okay, fine. It's fucking my T shirt.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's something you would do. Cause a scene. You never loved me anyway.

[H. Foley]

Those Bart Simpson shirts were huge. I remember I had a Notre Dame one that didn't quite fit right and didn't really make sense. I couldn't find like a good one. You know, like we talked about this week when you were a kid and you couldn't figure out what was wrong. Why did the T shirt didn't fit or hang or wear the way it did on other people? Because it weren't like worn in. You were a fat kid as I.

[Kevin Ryan]

Was a fat kid.

[H. Foley]

The collar, you know what I mean? You really had to wear T shirts in. And this one just never did. The collar was too tight. I think we got it at Burlington Goat Factory.

[Kevin Ryan]

Mm.

[H. Foley]

And it was him wearing a Notre Dame helmet, kicking a football or something like that.

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't think I ever had any.

[H. Foley]

Dude, those T shirt Bart Simpson T shirts were fucking. They. They used that kid to sell everything. Vodka, chocolate, Butterfingers. They didn't give a. Yeah, he probably wasn't getting the money, but child union, labor laws, they. He sold everything.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Timeshares, cars, golf clubs.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm Bart Simpson. Who the hell are you?

[H. Foley]

Exactly.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, I. I never had any of that.

[H. Foley]

He saved Butterfinger for a little while.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. Probably two. Two decades.

[H. Foley]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

Carried that ship.

[H. Foley]

Carried it.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm trying to think. I don't think we ever had any of that.

[H. Foley]

Butterfingers.

[Kevin Ryan]

No, I did. There was a phase rise in the butter, but they get stuck in your molars. Yikes. All right. Giving yourself a filling. Smooth little enamel.

[H. Foley]

Smooth that picking though something to dig at later.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

When you wake up with like a bump on your tongue, you're like, what.

[Kevin Ryan]

The one of them mid comma, I look at it. Maybe put it back in for a little savor the flavor, baby. Yeah, I, I, we never had any of that. I was, it was kind of funny. I was talking to my mom this weekend about. Because these young kids, my, my nephews, they all got gear and that's changed with like availability of ordering clothes and stuff like that.

[H. Foley]

My niece and if you have proper.

[Kevin Ryan]

Gear and we, we just, I mean like I'm not, We had cooler stuff if, if it was available.

[H. Foley]

Some Russell. Some Russell.

[Kevin Ryan]

But it was like you just get what's at the mall and you don't. These kids know what's cool. Like for us it was like I saw a kid wearing that. It looks cool. There's now like across the country cool stuff for a nine year old to wear.

[H. Foley]

Sure.

[Kevin Ryan]

You know that they all know about from Instagram. Tick tock. Like this is what the cool kids. I mean that's how they all look.

[H. Foley]

Fucking identical jams and stuff like that.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm not saying stuff wasn't hot or cool, but these Jefferson. These kids are identical.

[H. Foley]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

They all have the same haircut. They were the same. It's like I feel like you, when.

[H. Foley]

We were younger, you could make something cool. Does that make sense?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, I feel like that does. From what I mean, unless I'm not in elementary school or junior high anymore. But just they all look. Because there are now there is a universal. This is cool. It used to be like localized. Like the cool kids in my school are wearing this now. Jammers weren't cool all around at all the same time.

[H. Foley]

Jammers.

[Kevin Ryan]

Like what are the fucking talking about jams?

[H. Foley]

The Hawaiian shorts would have been before your time.

[Kevin Ryan]

Well, yeah, I'm saying jammers were like the kind of like the, Isn't that what they were called jammers? They were like the MC Hammer pants. A little bit like, like somebody chef would wear. You know what I mean? Like a Dallas Cowboys.

[H. Foley]

Fucking called them Z Cavaricis back.

[Kevin Ryan]

No, they were jeans.

[H. Foley]

Now Z Cavarici had pants.

[Kevin Ryan]

Huh? Let me, let me get eyes on this real quick.

[H. Foley]

My buddies Blair and Rodney used to where they used to share the same pair. They show up every day looking like a backup dancer.

[Kevin Ryan]

Can't touch us. No, they're not Jammers. Zubaz. Zubaz. How do you spell that? Let me get Z U, B, A Z.

[H. Foley]

That's not how you say it. I don't think I thought Zubaz. You said it like an alien. Rich.

[Kevin Ryan]

Zubaz. That's how they said it on the league. I remember.

[H. Foley]

That was a big.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, these things. Remember then they were like football teams.

[H. Foley]

I thought they were called Zumas or something like that. Zumbas, Zubas. I can't remember. Anyway, that was my. That was my day, though.

[Kevin Ryan]

I know. Hold on. I'm just saying though, you kids wearing them. There was leftover. Yeah, those things at school. I want to say we had a pair of Buffalo Bills. We had. We never had Eagle. We had whatever the you get your hands on.

[H. Foley]

My dad came home from a road trip one time with an Old Dominion sweatshirt and a West Virginia sweatshirt. I was like, what the do you want me to do with this school?

[Kevin Ryan]

Get my ass kicked?

[H. Foley]

Old Dominion. It's actually great school. Shout out to Old Dominion.

[Kevin Ryan]

But I'm just saying that was like, they know what's cool across the country now. Back then nobody knew that. It was like, sure, this is what the kids at this school at this time are wearing. That might be popular throughout the country. But it was never like this stuff school. And then I feel like now stuff gets very not cool very quick. Yeah, like that lettuce head kids are still rocking it.

[H. Foley]

Are they still rocking it?

[Kevin Ryan]

Cool, cool. I'm growing mine back. This just did stop Assad. All right, let's see. This one's just funny. It's from Aiden 10, Foleyville Citizen. Are you guarding if you slept with a lighter in your pocket a hundred.

[H. Foley]

Times, thousands of times.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, that's kind of.

[H. Foley]

I always that in the washing machine. You wouldn't hear it until it got to the dryer.

[Kevin Ryan]

I was sick. Whatever. Two weeks ago, I washed a bunch of halls. Cough drop. They were all in my. In. In a pocket of like a bear basketball shorts or something. And damn, dude, they were all halfway sucked, you know what I mean? Because they got the wrapper off in the water and then just luckily it didn't dry on any clothes. There was one melted in a pocket that I had to. What flavor the cherry? Like the red?

[H. Foley]

Yeah. Is what you do cherry?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. They got the best hit. I remember my sister having them as a kid. I'm like, what, you a coal miner? This is. We trying to cure your black lung with these things. My ludens, man.

[H. Foley]

Ruined like a gentleman.

[Kevin Ryan]

Man.

[H. Foley]

Ludens, lemons. Then they had the honey for a little while.

[Kevin Ryan]

We were a cherry fam.

[H. Foley]

Of course. Of course, Kevin. Gotta bend with the trends.

[Kevin Ryan]

I would be sick on whatever. Say, Tuesday. I wanted to take them to school on Wednesday. Really flex. And they never lasted. They never made it. They never made it out of twos. They never made it out of the car. I was in the back.

[H. Foley]

You had to have the small pack, though. You couldn't have the big ones.

[Kevin Ryan]

I didn't even know the big ones.

[H. Foley]

They were probably just popping when you were a kid. Yeah, they look like halls. You got to get the little bangers and the wax.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, the wax paper. Because they kept Blue Magic in and call it. Call it Blue Dog. I don't give a man.

[H. Foley]

Walking around school with that. Handing out school buses, straightening everybody out. Everyone's all up by lunch.

[Kevin Ryan]

Walking into a bar like Jimmy Conway. Everybody gets 100.

[H. Foley]

They didn't make it. Just walk around with an empty box.

[Kevin Ryan]

I got it rolled up in my sleep. Ah. All right. Let's see here. This one's from Kyle. $10. Bozo. Spelled bozo wrong. Virgin. Never have one. Red. Gave a buddy a ride home from work a while back. He was planning on paying me for gas money. Asked me not to run the AC to save on gas because he was so jammed up. Wait, wait.

[H. Foley]

What? His car.

[Kevin Ryan]

It'd be like me giving you a ride home and me saying, don't let me go. And me going, give me 10 bucks for gas to get you home. And him going, you go, I'll give you five. And no AC's cutting deals at the table.

[H. Foley]

Holy.

[Kevin Ryan]

Let's do windows down. No radio. I'll give you 750. And here's a heater that'll sweeten the deal.

[H. Foley]

Sweeten the deal.

[Kevin Ryan]

There was nothing like smoking heaters at an age when, like, you couldn't luck. Not luckily. As a young dirtbag who was heavy in the heaters, we all. We. There was an Exxon in our town. Shout out to Muhammad would sell us heaters. We always suspected there was a little 911 connection. And that's why he was making good by giving us heaters. If we kept our mouth shut. That's what one of the older kids told us.

[H. Foley]

Was this after 9 11?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. You better fucking play ball and give us these heaters.

[H. Foley]

The FBI drags you for questioning. Ahmed Good guy.

[Kevin Ryan]

One of the local dirt bags told us that. And then he got caught stealing Pat's change jar. Man, we used to Hang out with.

[H. Foley]

How do you get into his house?

[Kevin Ryan]

They were boys. I think he. Pat's dad listens. I think he snuck in through a window nice. And went down that had. There was so many dirt bags that we hung out with that then stole. Yeah. I mean they were like ticks. That was when the pills hit. And these kids would fucking faces all sunk and they look like goblins and I mean all my friends are doing drugs. I'm not. I'm not cast in shape. But these kids were like addicts at like 13. I remember I watched one kid put. It was the first time we had a good. Not a goulash. One of those beers with the fucking funky tops. Golch. He had a gulch. We went over this.

[H. Foley]

Maybe it's not golf.

[Kevin Ryan]

I think it's goals.

[H. Foley]

He had like a Beck's he's talking about.

[Kevin Ryan]

It was a green bottle that Until.

[H. Foley]

I was much older. I want to Holland. Why are you drinking that? So they get you that. I was older. I fell in love with it. I was an Irish born Sunnyside where I would go. This is my. These are my saddest years. I was living in Sunnyside.

[Kevin Ryan]

Like the ones now are so great.

[H. Foley]

Worst summer ever.

[Kevin Ryan]

Follow me. The other day. He's 50. I got mad. Someone forgot my birthday.

[H. Foley]

No. I started going to this Irish bar and I would get a Beck's and a steak sandwich and I go to the movies by myself.

[Kevin Ryan]

You were really doing it. But this one kid. It was daytime. That's what always was the. The blatantness of it. It was daytime. I don't. I. We might have just been driving or some of us were driving and we show up to this girl's house. Her parents are gone for the night or something. It's daytime. Like oh, so we're going to. Probably somebody's going to buy pills or something there was going to buy weedies or something.

[H. Foley]

If that shit was big. If that hit when we were in high school I think we all would have been. We all would have died.

[Kevin Ryan]

A lot of my. A lot of my friends did not.

[H. Foley]

Crazy.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah yeah yeah. And the ones that did are a little tattered. Did not stop at Percocet. I'll tell you that much. I'm talking Blue Magic.

[H. Foley]

How you doing?

[Kevin Ryan]

But we showed up for like a minute. We like stopped out front of this girl's house and that kid was there and we like fuck it, dude. It was like the dead of summer and he was translucent. Like he hadn't seen. Like he hadn't seen sunshine.

[H. Foley]

It was the dead of summer. What do you mean?

[Kevin Ryan]

It was like the middle of summer. Like, this motherfucker should have had a tan or something. He came out with like a sweater on. And we were like. I wanted to be like, dude, get it together. You know what I mean? Like, what the.

[H. Foley]

Stop, man.

[Kevin Ryan]

His head was always to the left. What's up, dude? Sunken in on like Gollum.

[H. Foley]

You a well nourished fellow?

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm picking a piece of Butterfinger out of my mouth.

[H. Foley]

Your mom didn't leave you pizza money or nothing, dude.

[Kevin Ryan]

Hey, you snorted it out. We were like parked out front. It was like there was a group of people already like, hey, stop by. They'd be like, Luke being like, hey, I'll sell you an eighth. Stop by Foley's here. I'm like, oh, we just, you know, we're out front like chilled smoke a cig. It was just like a five minute lolly gag. And he walked out. We were young. We were young.

[H. Foley]

Were you at his house?

[Kevin Ryan]

No, he was at this girl's house. Whatever. He was at the house we were showing up to. And he walked out like, gee, what's up? God damn. Get under heat lampers. Look like a. You look like a preemie.

[H. Foley]

Coming out here. Like a baby chicking. Eyes closed. This guy. Somebody get an eyedropper to feed this kid.

[Kevin Ryan]

But he had a big gulch. What? A big one. Like a. One of them leader johns. Like, I ain't never seen a European beard like that, let alone with hinges on it.

[H. Foley]

Does it have a nipple on it?

[Kevin Ryan]

I wouldn't be like, how the fuck you get your hoojah? Steal that from you? Ain't never been to Hamster. I'll be like, there's no way you bought that. It was a known thief. Just a known sticky fingered rat.

[H. Foley]

Addiction to supply.

[Kevin Ryan]

Dude, we were so young for him to be addicted to pills. Like so young. Like 15, 14, 15. And I said he had a big gulch and he took a sip and then dropped green pills in there. I was. This is daytime in this, like, you know, the suburbs, you know, I mean, there's like kids like, could have been.

[H. Foley]

Those hydrogen things that Gary Breaker used to.

[Kevin Ryan]

He's doing methylated vitamins that'll bring the color back.

[H. Foley]

Some of that iodine blue. What's it called? The Kids are on.

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't know. I remember being like, dude, you are way too brazen. I wonder if he's alive. We were just talking about him this weekend. Doubtful.

[H. Foley]

Dropping pills and beer we were.

[Kevin Ryan]

He might have been 50, might have been. We were young like and dude, this is daytime. Like a summer afternoon and we were out in the street. It'd be like walking out of your parents house and a bunch of fucking 12 to 415 year olds are out front and he's there. I mean the beer was bigger than him, him and he's just like, I'm going to be like this kid is. I'm gonna start studying, I'm gonna go back to school. I'mma tell my mom I'm sorry.

[H. Foley]

Remember when you had those moments when you were a kid when you realized you weren't about that life?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, yeah.

[H. Foley]

You got your ass home before dinner and sat there and had a nice meal together. Not going back to that neighborhood again.

[Kevin Ryan]

There was about six of those dudes. We used to hang out at a, at a young age where you're like, I remember this one time this kid stole Again, we're hanging out with just such. Because we're hanging out with kids who were like, we were bad kids. Good head on our shoulders. Bad kid. Like sure. Mischievous, drinking, smoking, prop. Trying drugs too young bad kids. Advent bad kids.

[H. Foley]

Now bad kids are stealing hurt people.

[Kevin Ryan]

We were bad, but we were bad kids to good kids.

[H. Foley]

Sure.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm not that we were bad kids but like, well, you and your buddies. I wouldn't want my kid hanging out with me and my friend.

[H. Foley]

I know, but you guys wouldn't start stomping on some old lady walking down the street. That's a bad kid.

[Kevin Ryan]

We're not in the fucking outside. What he did is crazy. This isn't sleep.

[H. Foley]

It hurt anybody?

[Kevin Ryan]

No.

[H. Foley]

Unless they were looking for it.

[Kevin Ryan]

But I remember this kid stole. Broke into another friend's house, stole a bunch of weed.

[H. Foley]

It's just this cute kid with the gauche.

[Kevin Ryan]

Another kid, man, you had a lot.

[H. Foley]

Of man, we were so a lot of zombies.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's the kid that took seven toomeys and filled with the chip aisle and they beat the out of this kid. The next day he knew it was him. So the kid who got robbed went and beat like, you know, was like you and dude, he's like, you stole. And he's like yeah man. And he just like beat this. I just like like looked at him and I was just like man, this kid's just willing to get his ass kicked and go I'm gonna keep this weed in this money. I don't give a what like now a kid is going, I'm willing just to get my ass kicked. Sure, But I got. I'm sitting on like 800 bucks worth of weed or whatever, so you can suck my dick. Dude. I remember being like, that kid's about that life. Just willing to get rag dolled in front of everybody.

[H. Foley]

You went home in time for some stuff.

[Kevin Ryan]

Dude, I got home, I was like, yo, I am sorry.

[H. Foley]

Went home, cleaned your room, did inventory your toys, Went downstairs for a little Racer Rooney.

[Kevin Ryan]

Watching TV with my pop. Hey, what are you watching, dad? Some quality time. Anything good in the paper? Yeah, there's a good amount of those kids where you're just like, didn't. Those kids. Did not stand a chance. Did not stand a chance. But those are the kids that live. Yeah, they're like, you know, cockroaches. You just can't. We bumped into one kid on South Street. Remember when the.

[H. Foley]

Were you guys?

[Kevin Ryan]

He was like, what's up, Kevin? Oh, God. It was after we got the shoes at Sneaker Suplex. Was he cool?

[H. Foley]

Was he all straightened out?

[Kevin Ryan]

No, he was on sale. Straight Street.

[H. Foley]

They could be working down there.

[Kevin Ryan]

Hey, yeah, remember that kid? I always kind of walk away from those. I was like, oh, oh, he's got a camera in my face. And I'm like.

[H. Foley]

How much you want for that camera?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Wow.

[Kevin Ryan]

Wow. I don't even know how the we got there. All right, let's see here. That was the paying. Paying for gas. What a home run of a question. Question. Spying cigs. But we always had access to sigs, so we never had to really concede for heaters.

[H. Foley]

Sure.

[Kevin Ryan]

You know what I mean? It was like, you get all. And they were still cheap at the time for us as a teenager, they were under five bucks. So it was like you could get your hands on.

[H. Foley]

Ours were like 225.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, we. You could get your hands between change and like, lunch money or whatever. Like, if I had five bucks for lunch, I go, oh, I'll just. Just, you know, I'll skip lunch. And I got a pack of heaters, you know, or save like a. A dollar. Two dollars this day. Whatever. Whatever.

[H. Foley]

We were always.

[Kevin Ryan]

I was working.

[H. Foley]

We were always very good about the ride. We never really had to beg anybody for a ride home. That was always, you know. Yeah, of course. Loop around, give you a ride home.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, we loved. Because there was never much going on. And we were big.

[H. Foley]

Driving.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, yeah, we were big. Chill, smoke a Sig, guys. Like, we used to go to my boy's house. Yeah, that was like, during the week, if you're like, yeah, I only got like 15 minutes. But like, I don't feel like going home or whatever. Stop by, chill, smoke a cig, pull up out front, post up. He was selling weed. Just sat. I just said we'd just sit and sell weed with him.

[H. Foley]

Sure. Good times.

[Kevin Ryan]

Plausible deniability. I'm here for a heater. Check the text.

[H. Foley]

Says right there.

[Kevin Ryan]

Officer, I had no idea he was trafficking narcotics.

[H. Foley]

Trafficking's a strong word.

[Kevin Ryan]

This one's from Toady's anal beads. Are you garbage if you keep the tags on your DXL suit to return it if you don't get this job. I'm currently waiting on a virtual interview to start in a full suit without removing the tags just in case I'm jammed the fuck up over here. But if I get this position, I'll be upgrading my subscription because I have some of that good old cashier my man shout out to you. I hope you get the job. Write in and let us know. But that's not especially a virtual one. Mm. That's like you didn't even wear it. It's one thing if you put it on, you get in your car, you have lunch.

[H. Foley]

Oh yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

You wrinkle it up.

[H. Foley]

How would you know the pants on during that interview now. But I've heard sometimes they ask you to stand up.

[Kevin Ryan]

Do they? Yeah. Really? I've seen it before just to go like, let's see how like how committed you are. It became a thing because it was such a bit on zoom during COVID of like people wearing like the up top business and then down below back it up and dump it. Let me see. Let me see what you're working. Let me see what you got downstairs. Yeah, like six months. I like. I. One of my buddies got got but like he was wearing a full suit and they asked him to stand up.

[H. Foley]

What the fuck?

[Kevin Ryan]

I listen I. As if I don't condone it, but I get it. It's like you can't put a pair of pants on for a goddamn job interview. Stand up, Blair. Them real small blur. Rude. Just saying. All right, this one's from nothing on that 10 executive director. Never have one red ever used your freshly removed boxers to give your bedroom a dust before they hit the linen basket?

[H. Foley]

Oh yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's bad. Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Oh yeah. Oh, yeah. Towels, underwear, anything. If it's going in a laundry basket, it's a rag.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm a big they. My dirty clothes tend to be used as excess bath mats for me. Like that gets. I would get to you. I have typically not my pants because I wear my pants 57 days in a row. But my underwear and my T shirt also. I find it psychotic if you're in your home and you wear your pants into the bathroom to get a shower.

[H. Foley]

I do that sometimes.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's so insane to me.

[H. Foley]

Yeah, I do.

[Kevin Ryan]

You're getting, like, fully undressed in the bathroom. Is. I mean, maybe if you got a pair. If you're like, lounge. You got a pair of basketball shorts on. Even those. Like, I do a pre d dress pre undress in the bedroom.

[H. Foley]

Sometimes I'll hang a pair of basketball shorts in the bathroom. I'll turn the water on. Like, say I get home from a late spot.

[Kevin Ryan]

Okay, that's a little different. Because you're trying to keep it low. That's a little. But I'll give you that. I'll do that.

[H. Foley]

I gotta do some business in there.

[Kevin Ryan]

Mm.

[H. Foley]

You know what I mean? I'll get undressed in there.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'll give you that. That's the only time I'll do it as well, because I can get in there, I can close the door, and then, like.

[H. Foley]

Cause it's got Always weird seeing your jeans hanging on the back of the car. Wallet and keys in.

[Kevin Ryan]

I never know where they are the next day.

[H. Foley]

Are you a cop?

[Kevin Ryan]

I feel like I've been robbed. I'm like, babe, if you see my. Because we don't, like, really close. That's like the door then pushes against the wall. You don't see it.

[H. Foley]

Sure.

[Kevin Ryan]

But yeah, I mean. Or I'll just do it in the living room as well. Throw them on the desk because it was key. Dude, you come. You're trying to sneak in at night. You got the keys. You got a couple of quarters or something, you know, or just whatever you got. I got a pen. I got a notebook, a wallet, you.

[H. Foley]

Know, badge and gun.

[Kevin Ryan]

Badge. You jam the up. All right, let's see here. This one's from Renla 10. Reform of Bozo. Never had one red. I know it's garbage, but we only have a few working light bulbs in the house. Good Lord. So instead of buying more, we just unscrew them and move them when we need light.

[H. Foley]

Damn.

[Kevin Ryan]

Jesus.

[H. Foley]

Grab a pack.

[Kevin Ryan]

What are you getting? How much is a pack of. What's a pack? What's a two pack of light bulbs going?

[H. Foley]

It's not that. It's. I. I know. It's just lazy.

[Kevin Ryan]

It's.

[H. Foley]

You just don't do it.

[Kevin Ryan]

I mean, but if you're. Now I. After I listen, I get being in a pinch and going. I Want to go in this room and there's no light, and unscrewing it from a light and moving. I took. I'm not.

[H. Foley]

You get into that once you get into that habit. No, but I'm saying once you get into that habit, it's acceptable. It's the same thing as the remote with the. With the Scotch tape on the back or the remote that doesn't quite work completely.

[Kevin Ryan]

Dude, Scotch tape on the back of a remote is completely different than unscrewing light bulbs.

[H. Foley]

Or if you have to pop the batteries out, put them back in the one button doesn't work. You get used to shit.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm not saying you don't, but that's real passive. You're sitting there doing the unscrewing and screwing light bulbs in. Six, seven bucks get you out of that jam.

[H. Foley]

Six, seven. Hot pack of bulbs.

[Kevin Ryan]

You know what's great? The bodegas in New York, you can just go and be like, let me get all light bulb. And they just take one out of the pack. It's like a dollar, you know, maybe two bucks.

[H. Foley]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'll give you that. What was big always. And I. Because I just did this the other day. I had to change one in the. In the hallway. I'm bad at changing light bulbs, but I had to change one if there's. I'm big on. If the hall light goes out. I'm now using the bathroom light. You know what I mean? I'll use another room's light.

[H. Foley]

Oh, yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

To like.

[H. Foley]

Especially up there with the dead mosquitoes and spiders and dust.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. Find a ladder. I got a step stool. But even growing up, this was like my mom. Hey, I remember screaming. And this is like a big thing of like. We never threw the light bulb. The bad light bulb out because we were like, the glare. You'll break. You'll get hurt or something. That's how you get cut. So we'd put it back in the box. Like that box.

[H. Foley]

Yeah. And then throw them out all together.

[Kevin Ryan]

I know.

[H. Foley]

Figure out which one was.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. And you'd have to shake it if you could hear the. I learned that, like, at age 5, how to read a filament. I'm like, this is. Is. What are we doing here?

[H. Foley]

That was always the best.

[Kevin Ryan]

Burnt. I think I might be a little left on that one.

[H. Foley]

You know, I learned that from an episode of God was a Quantum Leap or something. No, there used to be another show that was a time travel show in the 80s. And the guy went to. Who invented the light bulb. Was it Thomas Edison?

[Kevin Ryan]

Thomas Jefferson.

[H. Foley]

And the kid could time travel. It was a kid and an adult that could time travel. And the kid uses little hands to make the filament. And that's what made it work. His little small fingers. That's where I learned that. Can't remember the name of the show. It's a very popular. Fuck you.

[Kevin Ryan]

What? That's where I learned that.

[H. Foley]

I was gonna say he was a popular young TV star. He. Curly black hair. I can't remember.

[Kevin Ryan]

Jack Wagner.

[H. Foley]

No. Around the same time, though. Can't remember his name. Camera. The name of the show either.

[Kevin Ryan]

They got nothing.

[H. Foley]

I got nothing.

[Kevin Ryan]

A kid on a show that was.

[H. Foley]

About time travel in the 80s. Give me a goo.

[Kevin Ryan]

All right. Those eco light bulbs scared us. Remember the curly ones? And like they said there was gas if you. Oh, yeah. Those things came out. You don't remember.

[H. Foley]

Like they were fancy.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, but I remember them.

[H. Foley]

Were ever in Patty's house.

[Kevin Ryan]

We got one now. I don't know. I guess my wife bought it or I bought it or something. I've like just ordered light bulbs. Dude. This thing, it's like you're in a certain. It's like you're in the. Or you turn it on. It's like.

[H. Foley]

What about the ones that are half Wiffle ball? That's not all bulb.

[Kevin Ryan]

What's half Wiffle ball?

[H. Foley]

It's like plastic on the bottom. You never see.

[Kevin Ryan]

Oh yeah, what's going on? That's gonna melt. That's like putting bad Tupperware in a fucking. In a dishwasher. A filament will get you.

[H. Foley]

What do you got?

[Kevin Ryan]

Voyagers. Yes, that was it.

[H. Foley]

Was it a little. Is there a little kid? Yeah, yeah. Curly hair.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. Handsome. Dude. Why give them attitude?

[H. Foley]

I don't know.

[Kevin Ryan]

You didn't know it either.

[H. Foley]

Yeah, Voyagers.

[Kevin Ryan]

Mino Peluse. There you go. French something.

[H. Foley]

Good show. Time travel.

[Kevin Ryan]

Sure. All right, let's see. We got time for one more here. This one's from silent dinner veteran. Long time. I don't know if I get that. Long time listener. Oh, silent dinners. No one's talking tension. A veteran of silent survived deep cut. That's all right. Although we had less. I didn't have many of them because they were already divorced.

[H. Foley]

Sure.

[Kevin Ryan]

So it's like they're with. They were each with new people. So it's like that tension of like.

[H. Foley]

Couldn'T get them to shut up. I mean, a bunch of young love there was happen.

[Kevin Ryan]

When I was in my 20s. They were. It was a little tense for me.

[H. Foley]

My stepdad, plenty of Sunday night dinners after. My dad cooked all day and there was some. There was always a fight on Sundays. Always, Always. And then a quiet dinner and then things would loosen up. Somebody had to break something.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Sometimes it didn't. Sometimes it went into the morning. Unresolved voyagers, huh? That's when I turned the voyagers. I'm a time traveler.

[Kevin Ryan]

Long time listener. Recent, homie. First time. Never had one read. Is it trash to have assigned seating in the living room? My brother, when I would get into fights.

[H. Foley]

Oh yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

If one of us sat in the other person's spot on the couch.

[H. Foley]

I feel it.

[Kevin Ryan]

We never.

[H. Foley]

Your dad had a spot.

[Kevin Ryan]

Sure.

[H. Foley]

Your mom had a spot. Kinda.

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't know, I. She was never.

[H. Foley]

I always lay there, I always sit there.

[Kevin Ryan]

There was better spots, I guess we would defer. Maybe.

[H. Foley]

My parents really only watched a couple of things together. And that was for a brief period of time. I think when we left the house. That was early 2000s, you know.

[Kevin Ryan]

Sex, huh? What?

[H. Foley]

Ice Road, Truckers, fucking the Osbornes, all that stuff. They watched all that shit. That's when they. That's when they were watching TV together. But in the 80s and 90s, maybe it was Married With Children that we'd all watch together. Me and my mom in the 80s. Watch TV all the time together at night. Mash, moonlighting, a lot of Dynasty. Dallas. Crushed it.

[Kevin Ryan]

I can't. I remember watching. I remember when who Wants to be a Millionaire hit. Yeah, that was like the first season of American Idol. Especially because there's Philly roots or he was from like reading or something.

[H. Foley]

Sure.

[Kevin Ryan]

But I don't think anything. I mean, when she was working third shift to the hospital, she'd get home and watch one of the late shows.

[H. Foley]

Designing Women.

[Kevin Ryan]

No, like Kimmel or so or whatever. She'd float through whatever was on down there.

[H. Foley]

Yapping.

[Kevin Ryan]

She was. She'd get. Done it, you know, she'd get home at midnight, catch the end of Letterman or something.

[H. Foley]

You have to be back at work.

[Kevin Ryan]

Three the next day or whatever it is. Three was like three to 11, I think is a third shift.

[H. Foley]

You kids running around the house.

[Kevin Ryan]

I was a little older at that.

[H. Foley]

Point, but eating raviolis.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, well, I mean, I was driving at that point. Think. Can't remember. I was hanging out with the fucking Gollum. The pill head. My mom's at work. I got open crib. Steal my change jar. Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Weekends too?

[Kevin Ryan]

No, no weekends. Maybe like Sunday.

[H. Foley]

What about Friday night? Would she be out? Would she be working Friday night. I don't remember no chicks. Huh?

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't remember you.

[H. Foley]

But you wouldn't remember. You would have been having people over.

[Kevin Ryan]

Was my stepdad and brother. I mean like it wasn't like empty house.

[H. Foley]

You'd be floating around huh yeah he'd be. You keep them too quiet. What to go upstairs and hang out some chicks coming over.

[Kevin Ryan]

Who did I say that to? My stepdad and my yeah sister.

[H. Foley]

Your brother.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. That's what they want. That's what they want to hear. Hey you guys shut the up and go upstairs. I could have some drug addicts come over and go through our personal belongings. We gotta wrap it up gang we.

[H. Foley]

Love you to death. Back on the block tour get your.

[Kevin Ryan]

Tickies we're coming out this first run second show it's in at Cobbs in San Francisco we got Seattle, we got Portland and low tickets I believe at Brea Improv outside of Lozan Holly peace.

[H. Foley]

Gang we love you. We'll see you next week.

[Kevin Ryan]

Peace. Peace.