Glenny Balls!

Summary

Podcast Summary: "Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast – Episode: Glenny Balls!"

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Introduction

In this entertaining episode of Are You Garbage?, hosts Kevin Ryan and H. Foley welcome their special guest, Glenny Balls. The show’s premise revolves around determining whether guests embody "classy individuals or absolute trash," all within a humorous and playful framework reminiscent of a trashy comedy game show.

Guest Introduction and Friendship History

The episode kicks off with a warm introduction of Glenny Balls, a comedian known for his stints at Barstool Sports and his appearances on Sunday Conversation. The hosts delve into their longstanding friendship, spanning approximately 15 years.

• Glenny Balls (02:07): "Yes."
• Kevin Ryan (02:15): "Sorry for asking. You guys married or single to each other?"
• Glenny Balls (02:26): "I'm married. I'm married as well."

The camaraderie between Kevin and Glenny is evident, highlighting their deep bond and shared histories.

High School Memories and Jersey Shore

A significant portion of their conversation pans back to their high school days, especially their shared enthusiasm for the reality TV show Jersey Shore. Kevin reminisces about organizing a big season two premiere party when he was just 13 years old.

• Kevin Ryan (03:09): “We did a big season two premiere party. There was zero alcohol. We were 13 years old.”

This segment underscores the cultural impact of the show and its role in shaping their youthful antics.

Family Background and Origin Stories

Kevin opens up about his multifaceted heritage, detailing his Italian and Greek roots. He shares an intriguing story about his Greek grandfather, Demetrius Haricopas, who migrated to Denmark and became a leading autism doctor.

• Kevin Ryan (05:10): “He became like Denmark's leading autism doctor... Demetrius was like Mr. Autism.”

This narrative not only provides depth to Kevin’s family background but also adds a unique twist to their conversation.

Current Living Situation and Travel Lifestyle

Residing in Malvern, Long Island, Kevin discusses the balance between city life and the tranquility of Long Island. He reveals his love for walking and the serene environment it offers.

• Kevin Ryan (07:23): “I drive down there. 20 minutes, 40 minutes each way. It's a great walk.”

The conversation then shifts to their dynamic travel lifestyle, emphasizing their frequent trips and the camaraderie maintained through shared adventures.

• Glenny Balls (41:19): “We have our own seats. It's our home away from home in there.”

Product Promotions

Throughout the episode, subtle product promotions are interwoven into the conversation:

1. Rocket Money:

   • Glenny Balls (17:20): “Rocket Money is a personal finance app that helps find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions…”
   • Kevin Ryan (17:30): “Rocket Money’s 5 million members have saved a total of $500 million in canceled subscriptions.”

2. Lucy Co.:

   • Glenny Balls (19:01): “Lucy has a 30-day refund policy. Use the code garbage to get 20% off.”

3. Thrive Market:

   • Glenny Balls (39:23): “You’ll get 25% off selected items and new members get 30% off their first order. Plus a free gift.”

These promotions are seamlessly integrated, maintaining the podcast’s flow without disrupting the listener’s experience.

Personal Stories and Anecdotes

Kevin and Glenny share a plethora of humorous and memorable personal stories:

• Kevin's Encounter Near Manhattan Bridge (45:03):

  • Kevin Ryan: “It's almost like that... I could say to this day, my 20 years of life that may have been the happiest ever been in a specific 10-second span.”

• Naked Woman at a Funeral (48:00):

  • Kevin Ryan: “I start to hear, like, clopping, like. And I’m like, what the is. She was yelling nonsense. But that was... it was kind of sad.”

These anecdotes highlight their comfort with sharing funny and sometimes awkward life moments, enhancing the comedic aspect of the podcast.

Food Preferences and Cooking

A substantial segment is devoted to discussing food, cooking techniques, and favorite eateries:

• Pizza Preferences:

  • Kevin Ryan (51:38): “My personal favorite is John’s Bleecker. I really love Joe’s too.”
  • Glenny Balls (52:12): “I love Joe’s. Joe’s is a great knockaround.”

• Cooking Steak:

  • Kevin Ryan (53:10): “I've been doing reverse searing a lot, which I think works perfectly.”

• Favorite Dishes:

  • Kevin Ryan (20:12): “She makes great chicken cutlets… My dad makes a fantastic meatloaf.”

These discussions provide listeners with relatable content, especially those interested in cooking and culinary preferences.

Driving and Travel Tips

The hosts exchange valuable insights on maintaining friendships and safety during extensive travel:

• Kevin Ryan (42:47): “I think I am the last one that's still home, which is kind of scary.”

• Glenny Balls (41:19): “We have our own seats. It's our home away from home in there.”

They emphasize the importance of staying awake during long drives and the benefits of group travel.

Pets and Personal Life

Kevin shares heartfelt stories about his beloved rottweilers, adding a personal and emotional layer to the conversation:

• Kevin Ryan (64:00): “She’s a menace. She’s hella wow. I was up all night because of her last night.”

• Glenny Balls (65:33): “We got her and we named her Shay.”

These segments highlight their affection for their pets, resonating with animal lovers among the audience.

Conclusion

As the episode winds down, the hosts reflect on their discussions with humor and affection. Glenny affirms Kevin’s status as “all class” despite his unconventional living situation.

• Glenny Balls (73:24): “You are Long Island dirt bag.”

• Kevin Ryan (73:35): “I just want to be a little garbage.”

This closing reinforces the podcast’s theme of embracing one's flaws with humor and camaraderie.

Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Glenny Balls (02:07): “Yes.”
• Kevin Ryan (03:09): “We did a big season two premiere party. There was zero alcohol. We were 13 years old.”
• Glenny Balls (17:20): “Rocket Money is a personal finance app that helps find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions…”
• Kevin Ryan (51:38): “My personal favorite is John’s Bleecker. I really love Joe’s too.”
• Glenny Balls (73:24): “You are Long Island dirt bag.”
• Kevin Ryan (73:35): “I just want to be a little garbage.”

Final Thoughts

This episode of Are You Garbage? brilliantly balances humor with personal storytelling, offering listeners a glimpse into the lives of Kevin Ryan, H. Foley, and Glenny Balls. From high school memories and family histories to food preferences and quirky personal anecdotes, the conversation is both engaging and relatable. The seamless integration of product promotions adds a commercial aspect without detracting from the overall entertainment value. Whether you're a fan of the hosts or new to the podcast, this episode provides ample laughter and insight into what makes their dynamic so enjoyable.

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Transcript

[H. Foley]

Welcome to another exciting edition of are you garbage? The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash. Now, here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H. Foley. Hey, everybody out there. And welcome back to everybody's favorite podcast. This is are you garbage?

[Kevin Ryan]

Oh, yeah.

[H. Foley]

It's that little show. We sit down with your favorite comedians and we find out the group to be classy after just a big old piece of trash.

[Kevin Ryan]

Trash, trash, trash.

[H. Foley]

I'm your host, Sage Foley. Coming at you on a beautiful day. We're out back here with Tooties in a new edition. Just stubbed your toe on the corner of the bed. You know when the frame gets you.

[Glenny Balls]

Sure that'll get you.

[H. Foley]

She was cussing like a sale there.

[Glenny Balls]

Ruin the day.

[H. Foley]

My coast. Coming at you from right next to me. He's the CEO of aren't you garbage? International businessman and my best pal in the whole wide world, and I love him. Give it up for KJ Kevin James Ryan.

[Glenny Balls]

What up, gang? Shout out to you. Thanks for tuning in as always. Please make sure you rate view subscribe on itunes. Full video available on YouTube, obviously. Full video available over there on Spotify, baby. Those numbers are in the charts. Not. Not too shabby. Then the greatest website of all, www.patreon.com. sorry, garbage. Go over there. You get all that bonus content, gang.

[H. Foley]

And gang, we couldn't be more excited to have our incredibly, and I mean incredibly special guest here with the day for the first time. You know him from his time over there at barstool to the big stars over there and you know, from the Sunday conversation. Give it up for Glenny Balls.

[Kevin Ryan]

Happy to be here, guys.

[Glenny Balls]

Look at him.

[H. Foley]

Just found he was 28. I thought you were 65.

[Glenny Balls]

He's an old soul, this one. He's got the gold bracelet on you. Look.

[H. Foley]

You should have a checkbook in your back pocket.

[Kevin Ryan]

Sometimes I'll be talking to people, and some people will say I look young. Most people say I look a lot older. But I think that's a compliment.

[Glenny Balls]

I don't think you look older.

[H. Foley]

Which one's your son?

[Glenny Balls]

I think you carry yourself old. You are. You.

[Kevin Ryan]

You're a. I'm an old soul. I always say I attribute that to watching Friends growing up instead of watching Suite life is Zack and Cody. So I watched Friends and when I was at about 8 years old to about 12. But yeah, I think that's a compliment. I'm about to be 29, so I'm closing in on 30.

[H. Foley]

I'm responsible.

[Kevin Ryan]

Closing in on 30. And, yeah, I'm 29. Hey, can I ask you guys a question before we start this?

[H. Foley]

Please.

[Kevin Ryan]

I know you guys just mentioned. You said Kevin's your best bud. Are you guys actually best friends?

[Glenny Balls]

Yes.

[Kevin Ryan]

Or is this.

[Glenny Balls]

Or is this just podcast at this moment specifically, or. No. I mean, we've been best friends for about 15 years.

[H. Foley]

You would say I'm your best friend.

[Glenny Balls]

We've been. I've known him for 15 years.

[Kevin Ryan]

So he would be. My. My. Sorry for asking. You guys married or single to each other?

[Glenny Balls]

It's open. You know what I mean? Yeah, I'm married. I'm married.

[H. Foley]

Convenience.

[Glenny Balls]

I'm married. He's married as well.

[Kevin Ryan]

So were you guys groomsmen?

[Glenny Balls]

Oh, man. What's going on here? What do you want? Were you on the Reddit page before that?

[Kevin Ryan]

No, I was just. Is that a thing? Do they talk about that?

[H. Foley]

Kevin. Kevin, It's Glenn from tmz because that wasn't Henry at the wedding trying to get into an escalator.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's how I equate my friends, I think there's, like, there's best friends, then there's groomsmen, then there's maybe bachelor party, then there's acquaintances.

[H. Foley]

Hold on. That's because you're 29.

[Glenny Balls]

Yes.

[H. Foley]

That also goes with you saying that you just started a Jersey Shore rewatch, and then you also said that in high school, you guys would dress up as the. As the Jersey characters and watch it.

[Kevin Ryan]

We would not dress up as the characters.

[H. Foley]

You got real High School Musical vibes going into.

[Kevin Ryan]

We were eighth grade. Going into ninth grade was when season two premiered. So season one obviously popped off. And then we did a big season two premiere party. There was zero alcohol. We were 13 years old. All the girls are wearing their tight skirts, which sounds weird because they're 13 years old. We were all wearing our guido stuff. We spiked our hair, everything. It was a fun little. It was a fun thing to do. Posted the photos on Facebook.

[Glenny Balls]

Couple.

[H. Foley]

Couple of snacks at the house.

[Kevin Ryan]

We got our cool. Mom was the head of it. It was a fun time. It's just Jersey Shore, man. It was. It was a cultural phenomenon. Nothing like it.

[Glenny Balls]

That's.

[H. Foley]

So.

[Kevin Ryan]

That and Linsanity were the two biggest.

[H. Foley]

I remember the night that that kid popped being like, what the going on here?

[Kevin Ryan]

It was the day before the Super Bowl. The day before the Giants.

[Glenny Balls]

Never forget.

[Kevin Ryan]

Day before the Giants won the Super Bowl.

[H. Foley]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

And then the next day, actually, the Giants won the Super Bowl. That Monday night, I went to the Knicks game hoping The Giants would be there. They all were. And it was also the second game of Linsanity. It was against the Utah Jazz, I think. I mean, all right, yeah. Insanity was.

[H. Foley]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

This is funny.

[Glenny Balls]

It's like a sports almanac. This kid.

[H. Foley]

For New Yorkers, a time capsule, the early 2000s. I like it.

[Kevin Ryan]

I had my jersey.

[H. Foley]

Let's go back. Origin story. Hit us with it.

[Glenny Balls]

Origin story, Long island kid.

[Kevin Ryan]

So. So my whole family's from Corona, Queens.

[Glenny Balls]

Okay.

[Kevin Ryan]

My parents met and grew up, my whole family. Like all my aunts, uncles, everyone. So actually my mom and her two best friends married my dad and his two first cousins.

[Glenny Balls]

No way. A package deal.

[H. Foley]

This explains the groomsman thing.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yes.

[H. Foley]

Which that's going to shatter when you get. When you get into your 30s, by the way.

[Kevin Ryan]

I thought it would be a nice thing to dictate your friends by.

[H. Foley]

I think you're going to be talking to a groomsman in five years.

[Kevin Ryan]

But yes, a whole family from Corona, Queens. Like my grandparents are all from Corona. My one grandpa is from Greece, actually. And then. Yeah, so they all met. My dad was 19, my mom was 16 when they met, kind of whatever.

[Glenny Balls]

Now the different time. Corona Queen. Different time for that in the 1800s.

[H. Foley]

All they were doing back then was necking and getting ice cream.

[Kevin Ryan]

So they were 19, 16 men in Corona and then. Yeah, pretty much. My mom, her two best friends marrying my dad and his two first cousins.

[Glenny Balls]

No way. Are they all Greek? Are they Italians?

[Kevin Ryan]

They're all Italian.

[Glenny Balls]

All Italians.

[H. Foley]

Is that what your nationality is?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, I'm 75 Italian, 25 Greek.

[Glenny Balls]

So my New York Italians always have a twist of Greek and they don't like. They don't love it.

[Kevin Ryan]

Well, I had four grandparents and one of my grandparents, that was Greece, he's from Greece, off the boat from Greece, married my grandma. They all passed away though. But my Greek grandpa passed away in like 1983. And then he was actually, I believe he was a gambling addict. So he owed his Greek family a decent amount of money and then cut my family off. So I don't know any of my Greek family. So I kind of consider myself country.

[H. Foley]

The Italians really got to you in there.

[Kevin Ryan]

So I don't know any of my Greek family. I know none of my Greek family. One of my. The only Greek family I've met, they live in Denmark now, apparently. He. So my grandpa, his name was Odysseus Haricopas. He apparently worked to put his brother through NYU to become a doctor. And then he put him through, became a doctor and then he said, oh, do I either want to be a big fish in a small pond or a small fish in a big pond? So stay in New York or go somewhere else. He randomly decided to go to Denmark. He moved to Denmark out of the blue, and he became like Denmark's leading autism doctor.

[Glenny Balls]

Wow.

[Kevin Ryan]

So if you look it up, I think you can look up Demetrius Haricopas, denmark. He's like Mr. Autism. Like they have a book, they call him Mr. Autism. It says Demetrius, Mr. Autism. He's like their lead.

[Glenny Balls]

Their lead autism doctor.

[Kevin Ryan]

I think he's passed away now. Never met him. But his daughter and her son. His daughter and her son came to America a few years ago.

[H. Foley]

I'm talking to one of your aunts.

[Kevin Ryan]

The way you're explaining this, but either way. So I don't know any of my good family.

[Glenny Balls]

Sure, okay.

[H. Foley]

Let me tell you something, New York Italian family, if you're on the wrong side of that, somebody's crushing you for generations. Sure. The way he just described that. Tell you what, though, I don't hate that move. I tried to play football at a prep school after high school for that exact reason. Big fish, small pond.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, it was pretty good. Yeah, that was the Greeks, but yeah, then. So they're all from Corona. I moved to Long Island.

[H. Foley]

The family did.

[Kevin Ryan]

I mean, my parents moved when I was about three years old, and then the other two sets moved when they were about my cousin.

[Glenny Balls]

So they migrated out of the city.

[Kevin Ryan]

I got out of the city. So now we're in Long Island. Yeah, south shore, Long Island. So I live in Malvern. My other family lives in Franklin Square and East Meadow. So south shore, Long island, ready made vacation.

[H. Foley]

I like that.

[Kevin Ryan]

Beautiful. It's a great place, man. It's 15 minutes from the beach, 45 from the city. It's unbelievable. I've been doing my little Hawkeye walks.

[Glenny Balls]

On the boardwalk at the beach every day.

[Kevin Ryan]

I drive down there. 20 minutes, 40 minutes each way. It's a great walk.

[H. Foley]

What's the go to smoothie these days?

[Kevin Ryan]

Smoothies. I don't do much, man.

[Glenny Balls]

Chocolate milkshakes.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, smoothies. I haven't been doing much, but I just do my walking. There's a great poke place. It's fantastic. I love Long Island. I love it. It's a great place. Yeah.

[Glenny Balls]

If that's all, all said and done, career's over. You retire in Long is ideal.

[Kevin Ryan]

See, here's the thing.

[H. Foley]

Everybody's out there.

[Kevin Ryan]

Here's the thing.

[Glenny Balls]

I love it. Pete, sorry to cut you off, but we've always Said this. We're from Philly, so it's like, it makes it that much harder to get back to Philly. I would move to Long island if I had my family.

[H. Foley]

If my family was in a heartbeat.

[Kevin Ryan]

It is a. That's, that's problem too is everyone always tells me, oh, when are you gonna move out? When you're gonna move out, when are you gonna go to Florida? When you go to Nashville or something? I'm like, dude, all my friends and family are here. And it's. And it's not like it's a disease to be from New York, but like, you don't, you don't leave. Everybody. Everyone says you're gonna leave. I'm leaving in a dolphin Leave, don't leave. No one leaves. Sure. The only way people leave.

[Glenny Balls]

Oh, Staten island, maybe.

[H. Foley]

Who's saying that to you? Some guy working on his card at the house next to you.

[Kevin Ryan]

A bunch of my buddies always be like, oh, not nominal Long island people, but like, people thought your dream was.

[H. Foley]

To go to Nashville. Glenny, what happened?

[Glenny Balls]

No, it's showbiz friends. Why don't you move here? Move there.

[Kevin Ryan]

I love Nashville. I love Florida. Like, I would love to move to Delray Beach, Florida, but even does the.

[Glenny Balls]

New York, the new Delray Beach.

[Kevin Ryan]

I love Delray Beach. Delray beach is amazing. It's fantastic.

[H. Foley]

Love to leave.

[Glenny Balls]

I love you. I can't. The old ball and chains keeping me Delfrey.

[Kevin Ryan]

Have you been in Del Rey? It's the best. It's a little mini Fort Lauderdale, an hour from Fort Lauderdale. It's fantastic. People actually call.

[Glenny Balls]

That's the most Long island shit I've ever call it.

[Kevin Ryan]

Fucking Six Borough.

[Glenny Balls]

Glenn. Glenny Balls calls it.

[Kevin Ryan]

I go out, I go to Delray. I love. I go to one of the bars in Delray and it's all these people that have left that have gotten the courage to leave and just all these.

[Glenny Balls]

Old Italian guys that's very like, that's Tampa for Philly. There's a lot of, A lot of. A lot of Philly Jersey guys.

[Kevin Ryan]

What a great place, by the way. What Tampa.

[Glenny Balls]

I, I, if I could pick it all, if my wife would go, I'd go. And I love Florida.

[Kevin Ryan]

I actually recently. So my three places I would move to New York, I believe New York for that I've said is Nashville, Delray beach. And I've recently added St. Pete to the list.

[Glenny Balls]

Oh, say it's really St. Pete said.

[H. Foley]

St. Pete kid likes a shrimp cocktail. I bet St. Pete's beautiful.

[Kevin Ryan]

Right on the Water, maybe. Maybe get a friend with a boat. You know, on your own boat, of course. And then just great restaurants, great bar. Yeah. St. Pete's awesome. I'd love.

[Glenny Balls]

I've never heard a 29 year old. You gotta find. You gotta find a guy with a boat. You don't wanna. You don't want to own a boat.

[H. Foley]

You're 55.

[Glenny Balls]

Come on.

[H. Foley]

You've already lived the life, though.

[Kevin Ryan]

Hey, one of my best friends has a boat on Long Island. Then it's awesome. All I got to do is. Hey, pal, you want to hop on today? I don't got. I don't got to upkeep it. I don't got to do anything.

[H. Foley]

Find out. Glenny, some young looking older retired guy, lived the whole life, moved down to Florida and then popped up.

[Glenny Balls]

He's in the witness protection program.

[Kevin Ryan]

I think at some point though, Florida should be on my, on my list.

[Glenny Balls]

I. Buddy, you're dressed for it. You got. I mean, come on.

[Kevin Ryan]

I think this is a Florida. This feels to me like almost like that.

[Glenny Balls]

I'll give you that. Glenn, he did not like that.

[H. Foley]

Bring me on here and embarrass me.

[Glenny Balls]

I left out of Delray beach like this.

[H. Foley]

Only 25 Greek.

[Kevin Ryan]

This is a Nashville shirt. This is a Nashville, like Scottsdale shirt.

[Glenny Balls]

It ain't a Long island shirt.

[H. Foley]

Scottsdale, I get. I don't get your Nashville, Florida connection. Where does that come from? It's like mint chocolate chip and strawberry. What are we doing here?

[Kevin Ryan]

Well, Florida is. Florida's easy. I mean, we go to. So yeah, for our work. Caleb lives in. He lives in Delray Beach. So we go to Florida all the time. So a lot of our, A lot of our work there. And also a lot of people we interview, like a lot of rappers, a lot of stuff. Celebrities live in Miami.

[H. Foley]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

So we're in Florida a lot. So actually, I mean, the first time I went to Delray beach, we had a video shoot with Riffraff. I remember. And it was a Saturday in New York. It was a. It was a blizzard coming in in the north. So I was like, oh, I guess I got to go down early. So I went down early. I had a buddy that was staying in Delray. He said, oh, come hang out in Delray for a day. I said, why not? And it was. I was like, what? I said, what is this oasis on the beach?

[Glenny Balls]

It's.

[Kevin Ryan]

There's a place called Sandbar. It's packed. Everyone's watching football. And then there's.

[H. Foley]

Drink specials are great.

[Glenny Balls]

There's this Little Eli Manning went for 19 for 23.

[Kevin Ryan]

This is a 2021. It was probably Daniel Jones, but there's a little area called the Ave. It's shops, bars, restaurants, and it's right on the water. Delray beach is. It's. It's an unbelievable place.

[Glenny Balls]

Sure enough, buddy, I'm right there with you.

[H. Foley]

I think the reason why you appreciate all that stuff is going back to Long Island. You know, people that don't know it. Whatever we had Timmy D in here breaks down how good the food is, the way everything's organized. And we used to go out to North Fork a lot on the other side. The farms of this to that. It really is a, you know, a mecca.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, I really cannot speak too much on that because I'd never minus the.

[H. Foley]

Mullets and all that stuff.

[Kevin Ryan]

Well, Suffolk county is sure might as well be the south Southern County's crazy.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah, they really draw a line what county they're from out there.

[Kevin Ryan]

Well, Nassau county or Suffolk County. Suffolk's kind of like the rednecky area.

[Glenny Balls]

Sure.

[Kevin Ryan]

It's also where the Hamptons is about even considered the Hamptons. I mean I've been to the Hamptons maybe less than five times in my life. I don't go to the Hamptons.

[Glenny Balls]

What's a vacation like growing up when you're growing up? Where were you guys?

[Kevin Ryan]

We did a lot of road trips actually with everybody.

[H. Foley]

My mom.

[Kevin Ryan]

Well, so my dad's side is where we hang. We hang out with them like every Sunday. I was with them yesterday all day. So we all do something. We did like a Disney trip, Vegas trip, which was fun. We did Vegas when I was like 10 and 12. I had a great time actually. Really?

[Glenny Balls]

I did it at that age too.

[Kevin Ryan]

It's honestly an oasis. I. I wrote a different dad's second marriage.

[Glenny Balls]

No 28 year old says Oasis.

[H. Foley]

I know.

[Glenny Balls]

No, no, no. 28 year olds. You know what? Vegas off Strip and Oasis, by the.

[H. Foley]

Time he hits 45, you're going to be unstoppable.

[Kevin Ryan]

For a 12 year old Vegas, it was one of the most fun time. I wrote a report on it. I had so much fun because we went for March Manda. So my dad and my uncles, they did not breathe fresh air. They stayed in the sports literally the whole week. But then my mom and aunts took us around. We went to the aquarium at Mandalay Bay. We went to the wax museum at Venetian. We went to see the pirates Treasure Island.

[Glenny Balls]

What's going on here?

[Kevin Ryan]

We went to Fremont street, went to the Stratosphere. That Venetian, it's a. It's a really fun time for a.

[Glenny Balls]

12 year old just down there shooting dice at the Bellagio.

[H. Foley]

I wish I did turn the pants off the devil. Same. But I want to get. I want to get this drink.

[Glenny Balls]

You're a good.

[H. Foley]

You're a good.

[Kevin Ryan]

But in high school we did a lot. Me so me, my parents and then my mom's side, my aunt and my uncle and they would let me bring a friend because I'm an only child. We would do. We did a lot of road trips.

[Glenny Balls]

Okay.

[Kevin Ryan]

So we did just a sea. I got like a C. I like to see stuff. I'm not really picking up on that vibe. I'm not a fan of going to. Going to the Bahamas and just sitting.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

Now I think I would. I've just never really done it.

[H. Foley]

But you'll do the beach though?

[Kevin Ryan]

Of course. Hour.

[H. Foley]

Hour two, up to the boardwalk, find a nice restaurant, have an appetite.

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't want to sit at the beach all day. That's not. That's not how I roll. But I love being in the water too. The problem with the beach is though, you go to the beach. No one wants to sit in the water all day. I want to sit in the water all day. So that's my problem with the beach.

[H. Foley]

You want to be in. In the ocean all day. Really?

[Glenny Balls]

I thought he's going to slap your phrase.

[Kevin Ryan]

I would, I would sit in the. And if you get a nice water like a Delray beach, the water's nice and calm. Maybe get a few. Get a few waves. I could sit in there a. For five hours.

[Glenny Balls]

No.

[Kevin Ryan]

And what about waist?

[Glenny Balls]

Before I even start pruning. Don't matter.

[Kevin Ryan]

It's.

[H. Foley]

What do you. What do you do waist high?

[Kevin Ryan]

Just on. I'm. I'm not. I'm not the best swimmer. So I'll maybe do belly button maybe. Maybe tits. I'll probably stop at tits.

[H. Foley]

And you're hanging in there.

[Kevin Ryan]

Hanging.

[H. Foley]

I never met anybody.

[Kevin Ryan]

Well, it kind of depends on. On what? What water is it like Delray Beach? The water is usually not too crazy. It's almost like a lake giving you money.

[H. Foley]

What's going on?

[Kevin Ryan]

No.

[H. Foley]

Sorry.

[Kevin Ryan]

No. I'm just saying it's almost like a lake. It's a sea. But Long island, like Long beach is.

[Glenny Balls]

Where I go this November at the polls we can change is where I.

[Kevin Ryan]

Go to Long beach around here. And it's. Sometimes it'll be really wavy, so you can't stay in too long if it's wavy, but it's fun to be refreshed. Islands like water. But the road trips. Refreshed road trips we would do. We did one to Montreal, to Toronto to see the Hockey hall of Fame, then to Cooperstown to do Baseball hall of Fame. Then one year we did. I loved the Black. I'm still a huge Black east fan. Great band. We did. We drove to D.C. went to a baseball game there, went to see the Black Keys in North Carolina. Then back one year, we did.

[Glenny Balls]

These are like 10, 12 hours family.

[H. Foley]

You would see the Black Keys.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, I was obsessed with the Black Keys.

[H. Foley]

How old your dad?

[Kevin Ryan]

62. But so I took. Then one year we did like, a big baseball one. So we did Pittsburgh, PNC Park, Wrigley Field. Then on the way back, stopped in Cleveland, did Progressive Field. And then. Yeah, so those are, like, fun high school trips I enjoyed.

[Glenny Balls]

Nice.

[Kevin Ryan]

I like baseball. Like, I just like baseball stadium. School.

[H. Foley]

Sir.

[Glenny Balls]

What's. What was the car you guys were doing this in?

[Kevin Ryan]

I think we would rent one.

[Glenny Balls]

Like a van or something?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. Like, I'm an only child, so we have two cars, so we don't have, like a van. So I think we would rent a car if I had to guess.

[H. Foley]

That's smart. Family in there?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Vacation with a friend.

[Kevin Ryan]

It was. It was nice. One time, one of my best friends, Taylor, he's his family, they got some cash and they have met season tickets. So I brought him to. In 2013, I brought him to the Black Keys thing with us in hopes he would bring me to the MLB All Star Game. Yeah, the Home Run Derby.

[H. Foley]

Kid was moving and shaking back then.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

Got to go to the Home Run Derby. I did a little under the table deal, huh? Yeah.

[H. Foley]

What'd your dad do? What'd you remember that?

[Kevin Ryan]

So my dad is actually a janitor and my mom is a. She. Not. She's not a doctor. She runs a doctor's office at a place in Forest Hills. They've so. Monday, Wednesday, they're in Forest Hills. Tuesday when? Tuesday, Thursday, they're in Upper east side. She just, like, runs the office, kind of. She would say she's the office office manager.

[H. Foley]

What was the house growing up? What are we looking at? Normal single family home.

[Kevin Ryan]

Single family home, Long Island. Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Three bedrooms.

[Kevin Ryan]

Two.

[H. Foley]

Two, two.

[Kevin Ryan]

My parents have a bedroom. Bedroom. Then. I'm in my basement now. Hang out in my basement. That's my little chill zone.

[H. Foley]

Wait, you're at your parents now?

[Kevin Ryan]

Oh, yeah.

[Glenny Balls]

Are you based out of there or are you not? That's Is that. Where are you getting mail there?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[Glenny Balls]

Well, because I talked to him, he's like, I'm in town for, you know, whatever, a couple of weeks or whatever.

[Kevin Ryan]

Well, we travel. So.

[Glenny Balls]

So you're just. You're. You're traveling, you're nomad in it, and then pretty much.

[Kevin Ryan]

And then if I'm not nomad, this is home base. Yeah. Like, people, like a lot of my friends and everything saying, like, oh, when are you gonna move? Like, dude, right now. We've been. For the last three or four years, we've been doing Sunday conversation. We travel constantly.

[Glenny Balls]

Oh, yeah, of course.

[Kevin Ryan]

I like to be home when I'm. When I'm not traveling, I like to be home. It's nice. Hang out with my friends, see my family, relax. So I personally love it. I know. And people are like, oh, you're 29, about to be 29, living home. You.

[H. Foley]

What are they doing?

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't pay rent. I. Hey, see my friends, I have great food. It's awesome.

[Glenny Balls]

They ain't got shirts like that. All right, don't listen.

[Kevin Ryan]

People, they. They. It's. They look down on you for living home. You save a lot of money. It's. It's good, dude.

[Glenny Balls]

You're.

[H. Foley]

You're living the rat race in Murray Hill. What are you nuts?

[Glenny Balls]

You're hanging out with Riff Raff. What are you doing?

[Kevin Ryan]

Y. I don't. I have no reason, currently, at this moment, no reason to leave 100% KB.

[H. Foley]

We gotta talk about Rocket Money.

[Glenny Balls]

Woo. Love that Rocket Money, gang.

[H. Foley]

Yes, sir. You like saving money?

[Glenny Balls]

Who don't like saving money?

[H. Foley]

You enjoy saving money.

[Glenny Balls]

Oh, I love it.

[H. Foley]

I'm gonna ask you again, gang.

[Glenny Balls]

Do you like saving money, baby? Rocket Money is a personal finance app that helps find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings.

[H. Foley]

A lot of times you got subscriptions you don't know about.

[Glenny Balls]

You sign up for a free trial, this, that, the whatever.

[H. Foley]

Would you think that they just stop charging?

[Glenny Balls]

Because, listen, they're not in the business. Is not charging yet.

[H. Foley]

They're not in the business. They're not charging. Mark Twain said that they're in the business of banging you out.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

And you know what? Rocket Money's in the business of covering your ass.

[Glenny Balls]

Yes. Rocket Money's 5 million members have saved a total of $500 million in canceled subscriptions.

[H. Foley]

That's a lot of gum.

[Glenny Balls]

With members saving up to $740 a year when they're using all of the app's premium features. I've used it. I found out like I've said this before. I've signed up for like, like fighting streaming sites that, you know, I didn't know that they were banging me out for like $64 a month every month.

[H. Foley]

Creep. Ain't you?

[Glenny Balls]

It's dark web stuff. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to rocket money.com/garbage a day. That's rocketmoney.com garbage rocketmoney.com garbage.

[H. Foley]

Do it, Kevin. Talk about Lucy.

[Glenny Balls]

Oh, shout out to Lucy baby.

[H. Foley]

The best in the business. Couple things about Lucy you might not know, pinhead.

[Glenny Balls]

What's that?

[H. Foley]

First of all, you got the Lucy Breakers. You know what that is?

[Glenny Balls]

No. Why don't you tell me?

[H. Foley]

It's a Lucy. Got a little patch in it. Press it, get in there. Extra flavor.

[Kevin Ryan]

Boom.

[H. Foley]

Hydration.

[Glenny Balls]

A little bit of surprise.

[H. Foley]

Hydration. Do you like that?

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah. Who don't like hydration?

[H. Foley]

What are the nicotine?

[Glenny Balls]

None that. None that I know of.

[H. Foley]

Hydration.

[Glenny Balls]

I'm a. Listen, you notice I'm a Lucy man through and through.

[H. Foley]

You got one right now.

[Glenny Balls]

I do. Actually guys. I got all new sorts of flavors. I'm an apple cider man myself.

[H. Foley]

That's mine. Apple cider.

[Glenny Balls]

As you know, big seasons man. And the season's getting ready to change to the.

[Kevin Ryan]

To the.

[Glenny Balls]

To the fall. The autumn bit. Get in with the apple cider baby.

[H. Foley]

Call them up.

[Glenny Balls]

Having a discontinued level. Up your nicotine routine with Lucy. Go to Lucy Co. Garbage. Use the promo code garbage to get 20% off your first 20. Lucy has a 30 day refund policy. If you change your mind again, that's Lucy Co. Use the code garbage, you get 20% off. And here comes the fine print gang. Lucy products are only for adults of legal age. And every order is age verified.

[Kevin Ryan]

Warning.

[Glenny Balls]

This product contains nicotine. Nicotine, an addictive chemical. I mean, also great on a curve. Long Island Italian kid. You're doing pretty good. And 29 still. It has. I mean, it's nice, man. We'll stay at home till 40.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm gonna say my mom's not the best cook, but I like to cook. No, she's.

[H. Foley]

She's your dad.

[Kevin Ryan]

He's got a few good dishes.

[H. Foley]

Hold on. Our barometer might be. He might be his expectations of an.

[Kevin Ryan]

Italian mother now he's gotta.

[H. Foley]

He could have some grandmother in Sicily at once and thinks his mom's trash now.

[Kevin Ryan]

So even on Sunday dinners my aunt cooks. So my mom, she's got two Dishes up her sleeve. She's got a pastichio which is awesome.

[Glenny Balls]

Two dishes up her sleeve. And then she kids from the.

[Kevin Ryan]

And then she does. She does do it. I don't want to sound too basic. She does make great chicken cutlets. I do love her chicken cutlets. Those are her too.

[Glenny Balls]

And then my dad's off a long island. If you.

[Kevin Ryan]

And then my dad for some reason makes a fucking fantastic meatloaf and he does a great loan of pork. Those are his two and but yeah, like my mom Christmas Eve she cooks for us Christmas Eve because we all do my mom's side of the family and I don't look forward to it.

[H. Foley]

What do you mean?

[Kevin Ryan]

I tell her I don't look forward to it like my Christmas Eve. I like to drink a lot on Christmas Eve because I'll be with my dad. So me and him will hang out, watch. Usually there's football game on now then my mom's family will hang out in the dining room. But I just. I'll have like the mozzarella and like and the meat and the sandwiches. I don't like to do the. She makes horrible pasta.

[H. Foley]

What do you mean?

[Glenny Balls]

What do you drink? What's your go to drink? What do you like a Christmas Eve.

[Kevin Ryan]

Christmas Eve I'll do. I really mostly drink like seltzers and then I'll do some vodka. I'll get into it later. But I mean, I mean the last three years I've been introduced to martinis and they absolutely changed my life.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

What are you and your pop have it on Christmas Eve together?

[Kevin Ryan]

I'll do. He likes to sell. He. He drinks what I drink. He mostly, mostly was a beer guy. I used to drink beer. Now I don't anymore because that was a lot of extra calories, buddy.

[Glenny Balls]

You ain't lying.

[Kevin Ryan]

But so I retired from the beer game. But I mean I was a lot of you look.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah, you're a guy who could put down a couple of beers when you.

[Kevin Ryan]

When I use. When I sit down and look up the calorie. The caloric intake of what I used.

[Glenny Balls]

To drink in a night 3800.

[Kevin Ryan]

I used to drink like butt heavies.

[Glenny Balls]

I still drink but heavy.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. And I would have a. A lot of them. Sure scary to think about. But so now walks in both worlds a little bit. So now I'll drink seltzers and so if I'm going out, if me and my buddies are going out, I'll probably pre game with some seltzers and then I will switch to vodka or we. Vodka. Yeah, do vodka. Sort of the bar I could do. Then I'll. If I'm having a bad night, I'll maybe get some shots. And then sometimes you're crossing the line, and that's bad.

[Glenny Balls]

Doing shots of vodka.

[H. Foley]

Yeah, doing shots of vodka. Russian hit time.

[Glenny Balls]

I got all my goose.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm a Tito's guy.

[H. Foley]

Warm, chilled.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'll do either one, man.

[H. Foley]

Really?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. I mean, if it's too warm. I remember one time I was at the Hard Rock in Atlantic City.

[Glenny Balls]

I put it in my nose wide open.

[Kevin Ryan]

I literally. I literally think they put it in a microwave. I still think about it to this day. That was disgusting. But I mean, chilled regular, I could do room temperature easy. But really my favorite drink now is I love martinis. I've got dirty.

[H. Foley]

Yeah, yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

Not too dirty, though. I hate when it's actually dirty. Filthy Tito's dirty Martini. No, vermouth is my order. And I got introduced to it like three years ago. And it's truly changed, you know.

[Glenny Balls]

Who turned you on to that?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. So this lovely. He makes great cooking videos at barstool. Ever see Chef Donnie's?

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

Amazing. And we were on a. We were doing a thing called Storm Chasers, where like. Yeah, we're doing Storm Tissues. We were in Memphis and he was like, you know, you got to try a martini. Because I would literally go to a restaurant, a nice restaurant, and order two shots of Tito's and a Diet Coke. And I would.

[Glenny Balls]

At the table.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. And I would take the shot and chase it with the Diet Coke like a. Like an animal. Like a disgusting animal.

[H. Foley]

Hold on a second. That's the first 29 year old guy.

[Glenny Balls]

Thing you said, but that's even still rough for 29.

[H. Foley]

Nah.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Compared to everything else.

[Glenny Balls]

I know, but I'm just saying shots at the table is like a. That's a wild choice. You're sitting down with friends who are ordering martinis. You're going, let me get. Let me get two shots of vodka and a DC to kicker.

[H. Foley]

Heat it up.

[Kevin Ryan]

I was what I was. I was a disgusting animal. It was gross. And then he introduced me to martinis, and since then, man, a little more refined. I love them.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Anything else in that circle, I might tell you this or that Special occasion?

[Kevin Ryan]

Not really. I'm trying to think, like, you know what I've actually had a few years ago for the first time, and I've been making it myself since I was made up with my buddy one time in Miami for a drink, and he Looked, look, he was having this beautiful, this beautiful fluorescent drink. It was a nice pink drink. I said, hey pal, what are you drinking? Goes, dude, I'm drinking a watermelon.

[Glenny Balls]

I says to him, I says, a.

[Kevin Ryan]

Fresh watermelon juice and vodka. I have it.

[Glenny Balls]

Oh, that'll, that'll kick your tits.

[Kevin Ryan]

So last summer I bought a juicer and now just to get up to juice my own watermelon, I, I made a video last year of me making it on my Instagram and it's insane. Like it, you, all you taste is watermelon. You could load it up with vodka. You only taste watermelon.

[H. Foley]

And it looks nice in the glass when you're sitting up there.

[Kevin Ryan]

It looks beautiful. It looks beautiful. You could put, you could take a little, little triangle piece of watermelon, garnish it. Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Will you do that at your, at your parents house?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

If my dad saw me making a mixed drink in his house, putting a watermelon garnish on it.

[Kevin Ryan]

No.

[H. Foley]

You are classy.

[Kevin Ryan]

This guy. I, When I do my martinis, like I, I love martinis. They've changed my life. They've. They've changed. I got. Now that I'm getting older. I love dinner. I really do like dinners a little more.

[Glenny Balls]

That changes around 30.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, yeah. And, and I look forward to martinis. Like I was saying, we travel so much. Like I really look forward to a good hotel. Hotel bar, martini.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah, I'm right there with you.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, we travel with a good like six, seven people. I look forward to going out, getting some martinis, hanging out, talking. It's. It's what you look forward to when you travel.

[Glenny Balls]

This is. I feel like I'm talking to a more mature me right now. What the.

[H. Foley]

I want to go. Two things. One thing, the room at your parents house, now in the basement. I would love to get a look at that.

[Kevin Ryan]

It's bad.

[Glenny Balls]

What?

[Kevin Ryan]

It's bad.

[H. Foley]

I don't. You strike me as like a neat person. Organized, laid out.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm not saying it's gross. It's just my childhood basement. So. Actually a few months ago, Caleb stayed with me for two days and he said he was, we were having fun and he like he woke up the next morning, he's like, where am I?

[Glenny Balls]

Anybody else got a headache?

[Kevin Ryan]

I see red and. I see red and blue. I see red and blue walls. I see Eli Manning on the wall. Where am I? He was like, like, oh, I'm in Glenn's basement. Like I got met stuff everywhere. Like I'm. It's my 16 year old room.

[H. Foley]

Sure.

[Kevin Ryan]

There's.

[H. Foley]

He's in a sleeping bag.

[Kevin Ryan]

There's red and blue walls. There's Rangers and giants.

[Glenny Balls]

The red and blue Ranger, Giant, Rangers and Giants.

[Kevin Ryan]

So it's. Everything's red and green, red and blue. I actually have, you know, it's a hilarious story that I have in my basement. So there's this. So there's this. So this girl from Long island, she's. Girl. She's on only fans right now. So she used to have a partner called Mishwitz. I don't even want to say it. She's. Because she's different. Can you actually like blur out the name? So there's this girl, Ms. Schwitz. So this girl. Jackie and Michelle were two girls that were making like photos of themselves. They would print out posters of themselves like in lingerie and stuff. And we knew them from growing up. So as a joke, sorry, I knew Jackie, I didn't know Michelle. So as a joke, one night my buddy got drunk and bought me a poster of Jackie. A signed poster of Jackie, who I've known since I was in 8th grade. Wind up is poster comes. They ran out of Jackie posters. They sent me a Michelle poster. Signed poster from this girl. I have it up in my room. I have it up in my basement as a joke. But I never met this girl in my life. Two years ago, it's Knicks playoffs. I'm watching the Knicks playoffs in Delaware beach at Sandbar.

[H. Foley]

Where else?

[Glenny Balls]

Who walks in? No one.

[Kevin Ryan]

My buddy hits me. He's like, dude, that's. That's Michelle. That's the girl you have the poster of in your basement. And she's sitting right next to us getting drink. Like I have to tell this girl I a poster for my basement for the last eight years. So I hit her.

[Glenny Balls]

Really is the six barrel down?

[Kevin Ryan]

So I hit her and I'm like. And I'm like, dude, this is going to sound so weird. I've had a poster of you in my basement for the last eight years.

[Glenny Balls]

That's not weird at all.

[Kevin Ryan]

What the. She's like, you bought one of those.

[Glenny Balls]

You were the guy.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm sorry. But I did. I actually bought the other one, but they gave me yours.

[H. Foley]

Can I interest you still down there?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. So it's just stuff like that. Like I got, I mean I got some cool stuff down there. I got some like Henrik Lundquist sign stuff. I got. When we did Drake on our show, we got to sign Drake Raptors Jersey. Well that's awesome. So I got some Cool stuff.

[H. Foley]

How long has it been your room?

[Glenny Balls]

Since you were 16.

[H. Foley]

Since you were 16. I thought it was your basement. At 16.

[Kevin Ryan]

It's my. Basically my basement room now. It's my room. But they do laundry down there. How dare they?

[H. Foley]

Yeah, you kind of like.

[Kevin Ryan]

We got a freezer down there. I got all my Hawaiian shirts on a rack.

[H. Foley]

What's the freezer in the basement?

[Kevin Ryan]

Steaks. Yeah, I just put like six steaks in there the other day actually. From where you did Stu Leonard's. You guys ever go to Stu Leonard's?

[Glenny Balls]

I've never been to a Stu Leonard's.

[Kevin Ryan]

But I know you guys would love it, man.

[Glenny Balls]

So. Man, this guy knows us.

[Kevin Ryan]

Stu Leonard's is.

[Glenny Balls]

Do you ever have your birthday at Stu Leonard's?

[Kevin Ryan]

If they offered birthdays, I would do it.

[Glenny Balls]

Don't they?

[H. Foley]

Yeah, I believe they do.

[Kevin Ryan]

They do that.

[Glenny Balls]

Maybe not on Long island, but I know like up in the.

[H. Foley]

What is that? Is there one on Long island too?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, 115 minutes from me. I go every Wednesday. It's my little.

[Glenny Balls]

The ones in like Connecticut.

[H. Foley]

On Ugly.

[Kevin Ryan]

It's because it's. There's. It's a grocery store, but it's not even a grocery store. It's an experience. It's. They make it a maze. You just walk through a maze. You walk in. They got the suites immediately. You got to walk through that quickly. Have the bagels. Walking that quickly. Yeah, walk right past it because.

[Glenny Balls]

Not today. Lord.

[H. Foley]

By the way, did you hear him say he goes every Wednesday? It's his little weekly meditation. This is that.

[Kevin Ryan]

This past Wednesday I did my two hour boardwalk walk, then drove to stews, got my steaks and drove home.

[Glenny Balls]

Okay. Where were you food shopping growing up?

[Kevin Ryan]

King Colin.

[Glenny Balls]

King Colin.

[Kevin Ryan]

Okay. Classic stop. I mean, I really do the food shop.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

That was Claudia.

[H. Foley]

If you said you did, I wouldn't be.

[Kevin Ryan]

No, that was Claudia's job. But.

[Glenny Balls]

And it's also not going to get an order in.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. So it's. But it's fun that you walk through. It's like a maze there. They got the vegetable area you walk through. Then the dairy, then the meat, seafood. It's a cool place.

[Glenny Balls]

What. What was your first car growing up?

[Kevin Ryan]

I never had. I've never owned a car.

[Glenny Balls]

You never owned a.

[Kevin Ryan]

You drive?

[Glenny Balls]

Can you drive?

[Kevin Ryan]

I can drive. I just drove my parents cars. I have my license.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah, but.

[H. Foley]

Yeah, I've never owned a car's car.

[Glenny Balls]

Why would I have a car in my name? In case the other basement.

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't need it.

[Glenny Balls]

Okay. All right.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. I mean, I'm sorry. I never owned a car. If I did have a car, I mean, it wouldn't be that exciting.

[H. Foley]

Something sensible.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. I'm not a flashy guy.

[Glenny Balls]

Sure.

[H. Foley]

What are your parents driving?

[Kevin Ryan]

Hyundai's. My aunt, I think work. She like does advertising for Hyundai. So we all have Hyundai's. So we have always had. My dad's always had a Sonata. My mom's always had an Elantra. Just one different make of each.

[Glenny Balls]

Okay. Be a good student growing up.

[H. Foley]

Had to be good student.

[Glenny Balls]

Had to be charming the pants off them teachers.

[Kevin Ryan]

So I'm trying to think elementary school, I think I was a normal student, nothing crazy. And then high school, I remember I was about as average as it comes. Like a few years I was honor roll. A few years I wasn't. But honor roll for us was 85. So basically you needed a B.

[Glenny Balls]

B.

[H. Foley]

So that's not average.

[Kevin Ryan]

So that's not average.

[H. Foley]

Way above.

[Glenny Balls]

I don't think an 85 is way above. What are you talking about maybe for.

[H. Foley]

Compared to everybody else?

[Kevin Ryan]

Well, actually, you know, I went to a Catholic high school on Long island and there was three tracks to get into. So you would either be in honors A one or a two. Hey, I was an A one. That was the average dead middle honors was a smart and then A two was the dumb kids, they would. They didn't even let them take a language.

[H. Foley]

They legit.

[Kevin Ryan]

We would have to pick between Latin, French or Spanish. The A2 kids, they would only. They would only make them do sign language.

[H. Foley]

They had to learn sign language, man.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, but so I was in the average. I was in the average area. And then I was 85. But there was a few. Like I definitely wasn't smart. Like I cheated a lot in physics.

[H. Foley]

Got to sharp guy.

[Kevin Ryan]

I was a good Scantron reader. I was very good at the scant side. Yeah.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

And then I did do one really bad cards. I did one really bad sheet junior year Spanish. I legit. We had. We were blazers. So I. They gave us probably like 10 possible essays and like what it was going to be, the essay topics. And I went on Google Translate and wrote all 10 in my pocket and I tried to look at them as I was doing the test and I did do that. That was the worst cheating I ever did.

[Glenny Balls]

And you got to get away with it.

[Kevin Ryan]

I got done with it.

[Glenny Balls]

There you go.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm trying to think of the worst. I don't know if I've really gotten caught during school.

[Glenny Balls]

Did you take your SATs?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[Glenny Balls]

What'd you get? Do you remember?

[Kevin Ryan]

It wasn't good. No, I think it was maybe 11.

[H. Foley]

50 out of 16.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Again, that's.

[Kevin Ryan]

Well, it was 20 for me. It was 24, but it was the. There was the writing part, too.

[Glenny Balls]

You couldn't have got 11 out of 24. Does that make. That's.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's. No, because. Low. No, that does sound low. But, like, I mean, I got denied from Penn State, which is what I think. Bad. I got into Penn State.

[Glenny Balls]

Altoona, A prejudice against Italians.

[Kevin Ryan]

I got.

[Glenny Balls]

You didn't go to Altoona?

[Kevin Ryan]

No, I didn't go there.

[Glenny Balls]

Where'd you go?

[Kevin Ryan]

I got waitlisted from Towson. I went to Ualbany.

[Glenny Balls]

Okay, so.

[Kevin Ryan]

So I'm the next perfect example. I went to Ualbany. I think I got denied from SUNY Cortland. That was the better one. And I got into SUNY Oneonta, too, I think. Think so. I wasn't the smartest, but I wasn't the dumbest. But there was a few. A few categories. Well, actually, I was bad at math. So when I went to UAlbany, went there for three semesters and I transferred to Baruch. Right here. Yeah, on 23rd and Lex. And I had to take remedial math when I transferred because I was so bad at math at Albany. So I had to do a whole semester in the shitty building down the street from Baruch for no credit.

[H. Foley]

What degree were you going for?

[Kevin Ryan]

I never even didn't even know I didn't have that.

[H. Foley]

Takes math in college. You take math in college?

[Kevin Ryan]

No, it was really.

[H. Foley]

What.

[Glenny Balls]

What the hell kind of question?

[Kevin Ryan]

It was so basic. It was your meter. You had to take it to even get the credits to get a major. So. I don't have a major. I never had a major when I dropped out.

[Glenny Balls]

What'd you graduate? You didn't graduate?

[Kevin Ryan]

No.

[Glenny Balls]

I can't get a read on this guy. What year did.

[H. Foley]

Why do you say it like that?

[Kevin Ryan]

What do you mean?

[H. Foley]

Did you just. Do you. You want to go back and finish your degree?

[Kevin Ryan]

No, I would. I. What's the point of doing that?

[H. Foley]

I told you about the cutlets.

[Kevin Ryan]

What?

[Glenny Balls]

I am already in the basement.

[Kevin Ryan]

I mean, what I told my mom was when I was thinking about dropping out, I was like, hey, the time most of people go to college to get their dream job, I was working at Barstool. I had my dream job. Why am I. Why am I staying? What's the point of my staying here?

[Glenny Balls]

Listen, you might not be the smartest Very wise. Very wise.

[Kevin Ryan]

I always say I'm not the most book smart. I'm pretty street smart.

[H. Foley]

Very.

[Kevin Ryan]

Like, a lot of people think I'm pretty dumb. I'm pretty freaking street smart. You see the guy eating the ice cream? I'm actually pretty street smart. I'm pretty savvy. But yeah. No freaking. Yeah. I just think it was very. It was stupid to stay. Why? Why stay? I also needed. I would have had, like, to do extra time to get even a major because I was so behind because of the remedial stuff. So I was like, why not just drop out?

[H. Foley]

So what would it have been if you weren't doing this? What do you think you sports.

[Glenny Balls]

Not, like, sports marketing.

[Kevin Ryan]

I truly don't know. Like, I would think I would have said that, but I don't know if I really. Because at the time, I was such a bigger sports friend than I am now. But I don't know. I don't know if I ever could have seen myself doing, like, an office job. I think I would have had to, like, work in a deli.

[H. Foley]

If you went completely the only two.

[Glenny Balls]

Possibilities for a guy from Long Island. I work in a deli, earning office, managing well.

[Kevin Ryan]

It's such an interesting goalie for the.

[H. Foley]

Ranges or slice of Briji.

[Kevin Ryan]

It's such an interesting thing to think about now. Like, me and my. Like, I have my group chat of 10 best friends. There's 11 of us on the 11th guy, and we've been in this group chat every day for 15 years.

[H. Foley]

I don't know what it is.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. And everyone's a accountant. Like, everyone's an accountant. And they kind of, like, look down. Not that I'm saying to look down, but it seems like my friends, they look down on normal, good jobs. Like, they would look down on a bartender or something like that. Like, bartenders are good job. You make a lot of money. Of course, I think I could have done maybe something like that, but I.

[Glenny Balls]

Don'T know if I'd be a great bartender.

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't know if I would have been cut out to be an accountant. I don't think I could sit in the desk and do it.

[Glenny Balls]

No, no, it's not you, Glenn.

[H. Foley]

You're both way wrong. All right, if it went real left, you'd be owning businesses, whether it's a mattress or this or whatever. And you would build an empty Crazy.

[Glenny Balls]

Glenn's appliance store or something like that.

[H. Foley]

Not even that. You. You would own a chain of something in Long Island. Millionaire. You'd have the house and down. Down the beach.

[Kevin Ryan]

That.

[H. Foley]

No way you're sitting off.

[Kevin Ryan]

I mean, that sounds nice. I just. Yeah. I don't think I could have done the office thing. That doesn't. That. I don't think that's me. And. Yeah.

[H. Foley]

That shirt. What are you crazy?

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm thinking of holding other businesses, like, I think. I mean, I've been saying recently I want to do when I'm older and gray, or hopefully I have enough money to do it. I would love to own, like, a floating tiki bar in Florida. I think that would be fun. I got to be the bartender on that.

[Glenny Balls]

Like.

[H. Foley]

But you're gonna own it and be the bartender.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[Glenny Balls]

Like on. Like. Is it like a. Like a bar?

[Kevin Ryan]

You never seen a floating tiki bar?

[Glenny Balls]

I don't think. I know.

[Kevin Ryan]

They got a bunch of them in the channel in Tampa Bay.

[Glenny Balls]

We saw one going past to the Jersey shore.

[H. Foley]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

It's like, it's a fit. That has a tiki bar on. You just sit in the middle and you talk to people. 100 drinks. Yeah, I think that would be fun to do.

[Glenny Balls]

I pictured more of like. But I pictured more of like an Alcatraz.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. I don't know if that would be the most lucrative business idea. So maybe if I have enough money to do it. I'm older. I would love to do that.

[Glenny Balls]

Sure. I don't know. I mean, there's a lot of them. They got to be turning a profit. Get a bridesmaids party or something down there. Sure.

[H. Foley]

Charming the pants off them. I wanted to ask about high school. A lot of extracurriculars. A lot of clubs, a lot of this. Ooh.

[Kevin Ryan]

No, really. So you know what's actually up to this day? So freshman year, I got cut from football. I never. I had never played football before. And we were. All my friends are trying out, so we said we ought to try out. But my class is about 525 graduating people, so. People. Wow. Freshman year.

[H. Foley]

That's a big Catholic high school.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

People got cut fresh. So I got first cuts. Like, I couldn't. Like I did. I always had great hands. I really did. But it's not like I could be a fucking receiver. So I had to be alignment. And I got cut for at first cuts. And I said to myself, what else could I do? I tried to be. I tried out for the shot put team. Got the job. Why am I saying got the job? I made the team.

[Glenny Balls]

You're an old soul.

[H. Foley]

Then you start Monday.

[Glenny Balls]

What are the benefits?

[Kevin Ryan]

So I Made the team on Shotput and the Shop. It was. It was like bad News Bears. It was like five of us, a bunch of random weird kids. And it was pretty fun. And we wake up Saturday, we have to wake up at 7am go to the meets in the van and go to Icann Stadium. And it was fun. It was a cool little camaraderie. But I wasn't very good. I think my best finish was third out of fourth one of the meets.

[Glenny Balls]

Okay.

[Kevin Ryan]

And then we. But we would joke around a lot. I remember the first, our only coach we had, I think he was this guy Tom. The first thing he said to us when he came in, he wasn't even. Didn't work at the school. He was just. It was part time. He came in and said, just so you know, you guys are not gonna have fun on this team if you don't know how to laugh. Like if you don't know how to joke around. And then next year, Seth Moir, he cut me and told me I joked around too much.

[Glenny Balls]

What? So I got sandbagging. Son of a.

[H. Foley]

You're probably stealing all the stuff. You're burying him.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. So I. So yeah, he cut me and then that was.

[Glenny Balls]

Listen, I'm kind of the star around here.

[H. Foley]

Back me up.

[Kevin Ryan]

That was, that was it for me with extracurriculars. Really. I didn't. I don't think I did any after school.

[H. Foley]

I don't know when you said the thing about your friends. And I figured out like a big friend group. I do get like a. Not High School Musical. But in my head looking at that generation, it's like everybody was doing stuff.

[Kevin Ryan]

There was about 10 of us. A lot of them are on football. Somebody's played baseball. Basketball. But I did not, I did not partake in any of those. I got cut from football like I said. And obviously I can't play basketball. Basketball.

[Glenny Balls]

You still link up with those 10 guys?

[Kevin Ryan]

They're my best friends.

[Glenny Balls]

How about. How often are you. How often are you linking up?

[H. Foley]

They're all Long island or they in the city.

[Kevin Ryan]

So one's in Tampa.

[Glenny Balls]

Okay.

[Kevin Ryan]

Two are in Tampa actually. So two in Tampa, one's in the city, one few of them are married, one's in Chicago, one is far out on Long Island. So there's about five of us still in my vicinity. Like a 20 minute vicinity really. One of them is married. Who's my best friend. I was the best man at his wedding. I'll see him once a baby once every few weeks. I'm also traveling A lot too. Then I have my two best buds that they just moved into an apartment five minutes from me together. Yeah. So I go there all the time. So I see them a lot.

[Glenny Balls]

The boys.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, the fellows. So I see. And then we'll travel. Travel a lot together. So, like, what if I'm not traveling with Caleb and I got free time? Like, hey, why not? Let's go on a trip somewhere this weekend. We're doing. We're going to Nashville this weekend, so.

[Glenny Balls]

Okay.

[H. Foley]

So you are the only one of the, of the squad that's. That's still in the basement.

[Kevin Ryan]

I actually was thinking about this the other day. I think I am the last. The last link.

[H. Foley]

You're killing it.

[Kevin Ryan]

I think I am the last one that's still home, which is kind of scary, but.

[H. Foley]

What are you talking about?

[Kevin Ryan]

Whatever, dudes.

[H. Foley]

Dude, you put it perfectly. You're killing it. The meatloaf, the cut.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah. I don't view it as a bad thing. I view it as more of like a lifestyle choice or like a consequence to your current position.

[H. Foley]

How come when I say I want to move home with Patty, you say that's bad?

[Glenny Balls]

Because you're a loser. This guy's. This guy's killing it.

[H. Foley]

Yes.

[Glenny Balls]

29. You're 49.

[H. Foley]

Sharks car.

[Glenny Balls]

There's a little difference.

[Kevin Ryan]

But that's what I said. So literally I just said because we're drinking beers with his dad, we're so close to Barstool. So I just stopped at Barstool on the way here. I saw my buddy. I'll just say hi to everybody. I saw my buddy Danny, who's security there, and we were talking. Great guy, great guy.

[Glenny Balls]

28 year old guys don't talk like that.

[Kevin Ryan]

Staten Island. Great guy. So we're talking to him and he's.

[Glenny Balls]

Don't hold that again.

[Kevin Ryan]

I haven't seen him and I haven't.

[H. Foley]

Seen him since 20 Greek. No big deal.

[Kevin Ryan]

So we're talking about just updates live. He's like, oh, you think you're gonna move out to me? And I was like, dude, there's no, there's no. I don't see a point. Like, until this travel slows down, what's the fucking point?

[Glenny Balls]

I know, I understand.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, Truly, what's the point?

[Glenny Balls]

So I know. I agree. I don't. Yeah. I don't view it as a bad thing. I view it as like you're running and gunning so much. We live a very similar lifestyle where it's, you know, you're all over the place at all times. And sometimes it can be like, you gotta go tomorrow type thing.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. You guys are traveling all the time. And the travel life, it's, it's, it's fun though. I love it.

[Glenny Balls]

I would, I would put on £50. Travel. It's a good time.

[H. Foley]

I would move back in a heartbeat.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Can't you know about thrive?

[Glenny Balls]

Oh, I'm a Thrive market man.

[H. Foley]

Have you been over by the kitchen?

[Glenny Balls]

Listen.

[H. Foley]

Yikes.

[Glenny Balls]

They've sent us two boxes. It's like a feeding frenzy when those things come in.

[H. Foley]

We're talking real good stuff. We're talking high quality stuff packaged together, right. A lot of it leaning towards the, you know, it could be. No screw around, no grain cookies. What do you think they're gonna taste like dirt.

[Glenny Balls]

I know I'm wrong. Cause I had them.

[H. Foley]

I went through the whole bag.

[Glenny Balls]

I don't know what brand it is. I got. They're sending us some kind of Pringles that are like, they're like jalapeno. I don't know what they are. But listen, I'm mulching them things. It's fantastic.

[H. Foley]

Gang, you got school coming up. The kids lunches, when you send them back with, you know, with the usual. What is it called? Ibithol, Whatever, whatever they're putting in there, get the good stuff, throw it in a lunchbox.

[Glenny Balls]

This is the good stuff we're talking about, baby. Yeah, it's great. Now's the time to try Thrive market. You'll get 25 off selected items and new members get 30 off their first order. Plus a free gift. That ain't nothing to shake a stick at, baby. Go to thrivemarket.com/garbage to start saving. The sale ends 8:31. Don't miss it. Thrive Market. Do it.

[Kevin Ryan]

Do you guys have any good travel tips for like trying to be the remotely normal humans while you're traveling?

[H. Foley]

Don't be £400.

[Glenny Balls]

Yes. Don't hang out with a £400 guy.

[H. Foley]

I get real elbowy.

[Glenny Balls]

I mean, like, what, to try to stay healthy?

[Kevin Ryan]

Not even healthy. Just try to stay in the right mindset because when you're traveling so much, it could just fucking fuck with your head. Like, what's, what's a tip you have?

[H. Foley]

I think you probably travel more hectic than we do.

[Kevin Ryan]

And you said there's like six of you guys?

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah, there's six of us.

[Kevin Ryan]

Nice.

[Glenny Balls]

Well, one what? We've tried to take a little bit of control back from kind of all of the. So like we'll fly to a place and then go city to city to city to city type thing. And what we did was we invested in a very nice conversion van that we have. Meet us at whatever city we're going to. Our boy Ryan D. Drives out and picks us up at the airport. Then we're in that. That then takes us from city to. So we have our own seats. World. It's our. It's our home away from home in there. We got a tv. We can do pods in there. Everybody has their own assigned. It's very. We know what we're getting. We're driving with a friend. That's our. With the boys.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's.

[Glenny Balls]

The vibes are that much better than. We'd rather drive for six hours together laughing in there than a 90 minute flight. Because the 90 minute flight, everybody's all scattered. You're just the.

[Kevin Ryan]

The.

[Glenny Balls]

It's tail up in the air.

[H. Foley]

The ankles are swelling up. You got a couple of berries in.

[Kevin Ryan]

You know what you're freaking doing?

[Glenny Balls]

We're learning.

[H. Foley]

I was gonna say you're asking us. We should be asking you. But. Do you like catcher's mitt leather? Is that. Does that something that grabs you?

[Kevin Ryan]

What do you mean?

[H. Foley]

Catcher's mid level. So we got in the back seats.

[Glenny Balls]

Nice. Really real nice. Everything's embroiled.

[Kevin Ryan]

So one of my questions is the.

[Glenny Balls]

Show.

[Kevin Ryan]

Sorry, you just said Ryan D. Is the. He picks you guys up. Is he at the driver too full time?

[Glenny Balls]

He's the driver.

[Kevin Ryan]

You guys have to argue about who's gonna drive?

[Glenny Balls]

No, he drives full time time.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's awesome.

[H. Foley]

But he did it for a long time. White knocking it behind.

[Glenny Balls]

We would drive.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[Glenny Balls]

We. It's.

[H. Foley]

It was four hours from 1 show to the other. Not very pleasant.

[Kevin Ryan]

I like a. I love driving.

[Glenny Balls]

I love driving as well.

[H. Foley]

I can see that.

[Kevin Ryan]

A good road trip is. Gets me going.

[Glenny Balls]

If you were in the right. You're driving. There's a guy riding shotgun with you. So now listen. This is old. I'd be. I'd have the whole. You do. I'm driving. Right. Taking the responsibility. I got five, six souls on board that I'm in charge of.

[H. Foley]

I think he's going to surprise you on this.

[Kevin Ryan]

All you're going to say who gets the music?

[Glenny Balls]

No. If there's a guy riding shotgun, does he have to be awake?

[H. Foley]

Come on. What are you nuts?

[Kevin Ryan]

That's tough. Cuz. I mean he. So he should.

[Glenny Balls]

You're three. You're three hours into a six hour drive.

[Kevin Ryan]

My answer to you is that he should be awake. But I understand if he's not because I've been in that position too. Me and my buddy, we got out.

[H. Foley]

Of a nice lunch.

[Kevin Ryan]

Me and my buddy did drive to Florida a few times. And. And I as he. He drove the whole way. And I know as the passenger, I should be awake at all times.

[Glenny Balls]

That just two man trip.

[Kevin Ryan]

Two man trip. I know I should be awake at all times so he doesn't fall asleep.

[H. Foley]

That's a tough one.

[Kevin Ryan]

And there sometimes when the sun's going up and you're 17 hours in, you knock, wake me up when we get.

[H. Foley]

To a Waffle House.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, you knock and it happens. So you know what people, people say that all like, you know, you should. Let's say you're tired when I you want to cancel on plans, you know, you should go, but you stay home.

[Glenny Balls]

Sure.

[Kevin Ryan]

So you should be awake. But not everyone does just plenty ball.

[H. Foley]

Logic unless you need some type of navigation. I always looked at it like, I drive, you go ahead, take a nap.

[Glenny Balls]

I. Yeah, but if. No, if you want to sleep, then you go in the back and let someone else check in with me.

[H. Foley]

It's just the two of them.

[Glenny Balls]

No. That he's allowed to sleep then I feel, because it's like, hey, man, we're gonna switch back over at some point. I might drive.

[H. Foley]

Did you drive at all or. He drove.

[Kevin Ryan]

My buddy Johnny, he's been, I'm not gonna say a pro driver because he's not a professional driver, but he's just always been the driver since you were in high school. That behavior, him always, always a driver. We go to get lunch in Brooklyn somewhere. We go to the city.

[H. Foley]

Wait, when, when would you go to get lunch in Brooklyn?

[Kevin Ryan]

We both time this. We like to just do like, we'll go find a place in the city. Used to go when we were in high school, we would just go to like, smony gardens all the time place in Corona that I love. We were just like, if we're not doing anything on a Friday night, we would just go to the sit. Drive to the city and get food.

[H. Foley]

This might be hard to peg down, but how old were you? You made your first reservation. Because I feel like it was probably at a like, young age at 13.

[Glenny Balls]

Calls up Gallagher's. Hey, it's me, Glenny.

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't know because when we were really doing. We were in high school doing these like, fun, like, little trips when we would drive an hour to go somewhere. We thought it was the most fun thing ever. It would be. We won't really. Wouldn't really go to restaurants. We would just go to cheap eats places. Kind of like a Barbie. We used to love this place, John Brown's in Long Island City. Barbecue place. Used to go to LMB Symphony Gardens all the time. There was a place that's closed now. It was called Chickies or something in the Lower east side. And it was fried chicken sandwiches. So we go to places like that. Reservation places.

[Glenny Balls]

Gotcha.

[Kevin Ryan]

But that was always a fun thing.

[H. Foley]

Sure.

[Kevin Ryan]

If we're not partying one night, why not? Like I would. I remember one night, man, it was so cool. We drove to the city one night just to drive around because there's nothing else to do. So we drove to the city, did the hour to the city. And I was actually the driver that night. Probably two or three of us in the. In the car.

[H. Foley]

He's sharp, isn't he? Sharp guy.

[Glenny Balls]

He's recounted. He's recounted like he's a cop. Like giving testimony, but in a very.

[H. Foley]

Tourism kind of way.

[Kevin Ryan]

I remember we were right outside Radio City.

[Glenny Balls]

Wait till you hear this. You're gonna plot.

[Kevin Ryan]

And I had just. I had just gotten my license. So I was a new driver. And I don't know when to go stop. A CEO like going, when do I stop? I pulled. It was Saturday night too. At 11pm James cities bumping. So I'm in the middle of the crosswalk as everyone's crossing by and this pretty good looking lady, probably. I don't know when I was 16, I don't know what she was probably 25, 30 now.

[H. Foley]

Yeah. You can never tell.

[Kevin Ryan]

Walks by. I'm in the middle of a crosswalk by myself in the car. Just pulls up her dress and sits her ass on the foot of the car.

[Glenny Balls]

Ah.

[Kevin Ryan]

And I was like, wow.

[Glenny Balls]

That's man. Only in New York, not nightmare.

[H. Foley]

We'll be right back.

[Kevin Ryan]

60 Euro. That made my night. To this day. Made my night.

[Glenny Balls]

Sure.

[Kevin Ryan]

New York. You want to hear something awesome that happened to me?

[Glenny Balls]

Please.

[Kevin Ryan]

Within like the last year. So it also. It coincides with this. It goes. Me and my buddies getting food.

[Glenny Balls]

Coincides the word choice for a 28 year old long Island.

[Kevin Ryan]

So this was probably about a year ago. I land in jfk. I was gone for a few like a week or so. Whatever it was for work. I landed jfk. My. You ever been to Wohop in Chinatown?

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

So me and my friends have heard how good it was. We never, I've never gone.

[Glenny Balls]

So we're like this as of recent. You've never been a year ago.

[H. Foley]

That's crazy.

[Kevin Ryan]

So we never had really gone. We said, let's try Wohop. They picked me up at jfk. We got a car full of us. Johnny's driving, my three buddies were in the back seat. We're driving at Wohop. We're on the Manhattan Bridge. As one is, we're on the Manhattan Bridge. Traffic's dead, dead stop traffic. So we're going slow. We're going slow as we're at the foot of the Manhattan Bridge into Manhattan. Look to my right, there's a building going right here. To my right, big windows. You know where this is going? And it was awesome. So this beautiful lady walks out, she's in her, she's in her robe and she's looking this way to her tv. The bridge is over here. To the left. She legitimately, I kid you not, second floor, eye level with her, turns to the left, takes her robe off like she's in a movie, like it's Animal House like this. And then starts oiling herself up in front of everybody. And I'm hitting Johnny, I'm like, I'm hitting my buddies, being like, guys, are you guys seeing this?

[Glenny Balls]

Not to scare her away.

[Kevin Ryan]

And then she drops, drops the robe, starts oiling up and you're. It was, it was boobs everywhere. And it was unbelievable to see that in person. And then like to the car, to the, to the right of us, there's a dad literally shielding his daughter's eyes, looking at us, giving us a thumbs up like everybody was seeing. It has to be her thing. She's like a voyeur, I guess, or something.

[H. Foley]

Yeah, no, you're the voyeur.

[Kevin Ryan]

And I've just been like, dude, this is. I've been looking at windows my whole life.

[H. Foley]

For this.

[Glenny Balls]

Sure.

[Kevin Ryan]

For this. I've been looking at windows every time I walk by a building to see a boob. And I finally did.

[Glenny Balls]

It was.

[Kevin Ryan]

I could say to this day, my 20 years of life that may have been the happiest ever been in a specific 10 second span.

[Glenny Balls]

I know, I understand. I saw, I once saw a girl I was with, my father in law was on the corner of first and first, right? We were at a bar, that bar, one and one right there outside. Nice spring day, having some beers. And there was this woman just drunk, having a good time, partying. She had her top off and she's spinning her shirt around her head going, take your pictures, take your picture.

[H. Foley]

Oh, classy princess that you saw.

[Kevin Ryan]

Oh my God.

[Glenny Balls]

Nice girl. Was.

[Kevin Ryan]

Anyway, I have it even worse than one now that we Mentioned that. Oh, my God, I forgot this even happened.

[H. Foley]

He's starting to show little cracks.

[Kevin Ryan]

This one. This one's almost, like, not even horny. It's not even fun, but. So my. My aunt is from Cuba. She's off the boat from Cuba. She's married into my family. And her. Her dad passed away probably. Probably 10, 15 years ago now. But they were also in Corona. That's how she met my mom. So we're at his funeral in Corona at St. Leo's Church. This has to be maybe 2009, I would guess, off the top of my head. And we go to the. The funeral. I'm sitting there with my mom or maybe 10 rows back, and they're in the middle of the funeral mess, and I start to hear, like, clopping, like. And I'm like, what the is. I turn around, there is a fully naked woman walking down the aisle in church in the middle of this funeral, fully naked. Honestly. Kind of.

[Glenny Balls]

Kind of hot. Not hot, but stacked.

[Kevin Ryan]

Pretty. Pretty nice boobs.

[H. Foley]

How old did you say she was?

[Kevin Ryan]

She was probably about 50. And she ran up on there, like, went crazy. The altar boy had to take his, like, cloak off and wrap her up. The cops came.

[H. Foley]

It was, damn. She know the deceased.

[Kevin Ryan]

She was just crazy. I think she's a crazy lady. And she was yelling nonsense. But that was. That was one of the weird. It was.

[Glenny Balls]

Damn.

[Kevin Ryan]

It was kind of sad. It was kind of sad because as a younger guy, I'm like, oh, wow, I would love to enjoy these, but I can't. But the scenario was real. Good versus bad.

[Glenny Balls]

Sure.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

When you go to a restaurant, you get the fried calamari and they give you an aioli dip into the marinara. Ruins it. I'm with you.

[Kevin Ryan]

Oh, disagree.

[Glenny Balls]

Whoa. Bad take by the big man.

[H. Foley]

Really?

[Glenny Balls]

Look at you.

[H. Foley]

All right.

[Kevin Ryan]

Oh, dude, I'm an iolic fiend.

[H. Foley]

You are fiend.

[Kevin Ryan]

I was doing for a while. Just keep bringing it back on. Tick tock. I was just doing chipotle aioli reviews for a while. I love chipotle.

[H. Foley]

Just in the calamari category. You like to keep that traditional other than the sauce.

[Kevin Ryan]

I also don't like calamari. I'm out on it.

[H. Foley]

Oh, anybody? Long Island.

[Kevin Ryan]

Notice my friends whenever we go to dinner there, they love it. I'm like, hey, you guys enjoy them. I'm gonna back off.

[Glenny Balls]

I don't disagree with calamari. I've recently turned a corner on it. We've had it. It's the same everywhere. It's okay. Let's get a little crazier. Let's take a bigger swing.

[H. Foley]

I forgot to be having that with everything.

[Kevin Ryan]

It's not that I don't like it. It's just. It's just there for me. I don't.

[H. Foley]

You think it's a pedestrian a little bit?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yes, it's very pedestrian. It's just there. But like you said, like, everyone's had it. I do think a bad one is horrible.

[Glenny Balls]

I don't.

[Kevin Ryan]

The great one is really good.

[Glenny Balls]

Sure.

[Kevin Ryan]

Nice crisp on it. I love them. They do Rhode island style with the hot cherry peppers in it.

[H. Foley]

I was going to ask you.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's. That's a good. That will get me in there with an. A cherry.

[H. Foley]

That would come with an aioli.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

Cherry peppers are one of my most underrated things in the world. I love cherry peppers.

[Glenny Balls]

Okay.

[Kevin Ryan]

And green chilies, if you guys ever had those. Best topping for a burger.

[Glenny Balls]

Sure. I understand that.

[H. Foley]

Very sophisticated. I like it.

[Glenny Balls]

Huh?

[Kevin Ryan]

I gotta stop talking about food. Every podcast I do, it just becomes.

[Glenny Balls]

No, that's what we're talking about.

[Kevin Ryan]

It says a lot.

[H. Foley]

What do you mean?

[Glenny Balls]

What kind of mayo? Growing up and now Hellman's. Okay.

[Kevin Ryan]

I mean, people love Dukes. That's. That's the sophisticated Dukes or the qp. The Japanese mayo. People love that.

[H. Foley]

Sometimes that's too much for me.

[Kevin Ryan]

It is.

[H. Foley]

And something in my head, I'm like, this isn't an American sale.

[Kevin Ryan]

I also recently ordered QP mayo off because during the Dark Web. It was a few years. It was. I ordered sauce on apple Amazon way too often. But it was a few years ago. I was watching guys grocery games was my Covid show, and they were always using qpmao on that. I said, I gotta try this. I ordered some eyes on Amazon. I looked at the nutritional facts. I said to myself, I can't have this. I think it's like 200 calories.

[H. Foley]

Got egg yolk in that bad boy.

[Kevin Ryan]

I said, this is this. We need to put this away before we get too out of hand.

[H. Foley]

I recently took a chance on Mike's, the one that Jason Alexander's pushing.

[Glenny Balls]

Everyone's pushing that.

[H. Foley]

All right.

[Kevin Ryan]

Is that the. They do the mustard too. It's like a cool design. Yes. It looks almost like a caricature of a city.

[H. Foley]

Almost like a Bob's Burger kind of.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know. I like to stick to my Hellman's, but I love mayo. Mayo's too good.

[H. Foley]

It's a gentleman.

[Glenny Balls]

You got a. What's your Favorite pizza place in the city. Not favorite, just one year or whatever. What do you like?

[Kevin Ryan]

I mean, I don't really get too much pizza in the city, I will say, because Dave always says that this was his favorite. He always loved John's Bleecker. So they would always send pies to Barstool and I always thought that, I always thought that was one of my. They would always send it and I thought that was one of my favorites because I, I do think this is a fair thing about pizza. Pizza. Like I had tried Dafar in Brooklyn back when the old, when Dom was still alive and it was. I don't like pizza fresh out of the oven. It's almost too hot. That guy loved getting Johnson Bleecker two bar still delivered. He was that perfect temperature. I really like John's Bleecker. I mean people look down on it now. Joe's. I like Joe's.

[Glenny Balls]

I love Joe's. Joe's is a great knock around, but.

[Kevin Ryan]

I haven't had any of the really big one. I haven't had scars. I haven't had the industry.

[Glenny Balls]

Okay.

[Kevin Ryan]

I really love, like I mentioned before, lmb Symone Gardens. It's not a. Sure, it's not a regular triangle slice but, but it's so good.

[H. Foley]

Simone. Guy. Spamoni Guy.

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't really like the ice, just the, the p. Have you ever had the pizza?

[H. Foley]

No, never know.

[Kevin Ryan]

It's. It's a basically Sicilian pie, but the cheese on the bottom, the sauce is on the top. Life changing. Guys like, guys like me and you, we could put down six.

[H. Foley]

Love it.

[Kevin Ryan]

It's like, it's like clouds. They're eating clouds.

[H. Foley]

I'm a.

[Glenny Balls]

Never heard that before.

[Kevin Ryan]

Oh, when I, when I was at my biggest, I would put down a good.

[Glenny Balls]

No referred to as clouds.

[H. Foley]

Yeah, you're an old soul if you had one.

[Kevin Ryan]

They're clouds. I'm telling you.

[H. Foley]

You, you're an old soul. But I think a man gets to a certain point where the Sicilian start. Start to become a little.

[Glenny Balls]

You need a little, little change up.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Big, big fan of it.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm honestly not the biggest pizza person in the world though. I don't go crazy for pizza. I. I mean, I don't really know what I go crazy for.

[Glenny Balls]

How do you get your steak cooked?

[Kevin Ryan]

Medium rare.

[Glenny Balls]

How do you cook it at home?

[Kevin Ryan]

Medium. I'll try to do even rare. I like rare.

[Glenny Balls]

What are you cooking on?

[Kevin Ryan]

I've been doing a lot, so I've recently got a cast irons. I got a cast Iron, like a year ago. I recently got a stainless steel penny. I've been doing reverse searing a lot, which I. Which I think it works perfectly.

[Glenny Balls]

Okay.

[Kevin Ryan]

So I put it in the oven for like eight minutes at 390, pop it out, have the hot pan go and just throw it on there for like 45 seconds each side. And then it comes out pretty. Damn. I got. I will say I cook a pretty good steak.

[H. Foley]

How does that work in the house? It's your mom's kitchen. You got your own stuff. What's going on?

[Kevin Ryan]

My mom, she. I always tell us her. She knows this. She has a horrible palette, a horrendous palette. So she doesn't even like. She eats like. She eats like chicken salad. She makes chicken salad for the week and eats chicken salad. She doesn't eat, eat. She's not a food person. She just.

[H. Foley]

Is that the way it is in the house? She'll. You guys sit down and have dinner when you're home.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Together.

[Kevin Ryan]

But she'll have, like, she'll make her own. She's.

[H. Foley]

Lunch.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. She's not very sad. Like a few days ago, for example, I made some steak and I said, claudia, have some of this.

[Glenny Balls]

You call your mom Claudia? No. Okay.

[Kevin Ryan]

Sometimes with a wing joke as a joke. Yeah, Yeah, I call Claudia. She's on my phone as Claude.

[Glenny Balls]

Okay, that's funny.

[H. Foley]

But so you'll cook sometimes for everybody for the thing?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, all the time. Mostly if I'm doing it, like, I'll usually handle my dad. He usually eats what I eat, meat.

[Glenny Balls]

But there's some steak tips out there if you need it.

[Kevin Ryan]

But he complains about chicken too. And I. I mostly try to do chicken because I've been trying to shed a couple lbs. I've been doing all like ground chicken, chicken thigh, chicken breasts.

[H. Foley]

You got at the grill. You got the grill.

[Kevin Ryan]

I've only done it once this summer. I actually plan to put a video posting. I'm posting tonight of steak on the grill. I made steak on the grill for the first time last week.

[H. Foley]

Was it filet?

[Kevin Ryan]

It was two rib eyes in a strip. I ruined kind of nailed it.

[H. Foley]

Ruined a bunch of fillets on the.

[Kevin Ryan]

Grille on the grill. Sounds scary.

[H. Foley]

I It.

[Kevin Ryan]

The whole grill.

[H. Foley]

The whole grill.

[Kevin Ryan]

It's a very intimidating. Yeah.

[Glenny Balls]

And you need a lot of time behind. Get okay with it.

[Kevin Ryan]

And then people, when you see, like, really skilled people, they're like, oh, this one's down the fire. Then we're putting it off the fire. You know, that's it over here. I Watch like Michael Simon videos and he's doing that. It's like a magician. I can't handle that. Yeah, the grill. The grill is very scary to me. But I mean, I love it. You said cooking's fun.

[H. Foley]

You said something earlier about the pizza, which. Which. Which got me thinking about something. Is there anything that you prefer the next day?

[Glenny Balls]

Cold.

[Kevin Ryan]

I love p. I love cold pizza.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

But you know what? Actually, I've been fucking loving cold. Like, really loving cold. I mentioned earlier the place I've been going. I did my walk on the beach, and then I go to this place, Sherry Blossom in Long Beach. It's a poke place and it's so. It's one of my favorite meals I've been having. It's unbelievable. Like, the. The spot that's a little spice on there with chili oil they put on. Make spicy Connie with it. Then they add in this marinated tuna. It like toads everything down. But then I fucking bring half of it home and I have it the next day. Not even have it the next day cold. I'll just open it a few times a day, take a bite, put it away, and just. That'll be my little. If I'm ever hungry, I'll just pick it up, have a bite, put it away.

[H. Foley]

Screaming cold is.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, basically. I mean, bouquet is basically deconstructed sushi. It's divine.

[H. Foley]

Will you dig into a meatloaf or anything like that? Well, whatever leftovers you got. You take leftovers home from the restaurant.

[Kevin Ryan]

Not. It's not many leftovers to bring.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

Respect. I don't really. I don't know. I mean, different. It's different restaurants. Like, my favorite restaurant is this place, Luigi's in New Hyde Park. So I'll bring home their pasta a lot because they put a big fucking.

[H. Foley]

Is that something you would have cold the next day, later that night?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

I've been trying to not have. I've been trying to not have too many full leftover meals that. Once again, with the pasta, I'll just bring it out, have a few bites, put it back, and that'll be my satisfactory throughout the day. And. Yeah.

[Glenny Balls]

You drink milk with dinner growing up?

[Kevin Ryan]

No. Is that a thing?

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Really?

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

I was not really.

[H. Foley]

Lazy kid.

[Kevin Ryan]

Like, you're really a big milk person. I mean, growing up, I was probably banging out like, coke with dinner.

[Glenny Balls]

Sure.

[Kevin Ryan]

Me and my mom were fighting about that yesterday. She was. She was trying to blame. I was trying to blame her. The reason I was a big guy growing up, she's like no, it was you. You're always hungry. I was like, dude, you're the one who's supposed to tell me no.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah, man.

[H. Foley]

It's addicting to seeing your kid. You're always hungry.

[Kevin Ryan]

Now she'll give it to me sometimes because I. I was. Did Theo's podcast recently. We were talking about it, and I said my mom used to supersize me. She would. They would let me get super sized when I was a kid.

[Glenny Balls]

That's crazy.

[Kevin Ryan]

So you know what it actually was, though? I think it was my dad, because my mom always worked late on Mondays. So I think I was sad that my mom wasn't home. And he would be like, oh, let's go to McDonald's. And I would order super size. Like, dude, you can't let me. You can. You can't let a child supersize.

[Glenny Balls]

I remember doing that one time, my mom going, who the. Like, what are you nuts? It's like six pounds of fries.

[H. Foley]

Love it.

[Kevin Ryan]

The fries are the worst part.

[Glenny Balls]

I know they're the best part.

[Kevin Ryan]

But this much fries, that's what they get.

[H. Foley]

Fries are the worst part.

[Kevin Ryan]

Super. The fact that that was even a thing is wild.

[Glenny Balls]

Do they still do it? Can you still supersize? The government stepped in.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. Like this Morgan Spurlock, he passed away, right? Rip Be.

[H. Foley]

Wendy's was talking about bringing it back. It's a biggie size.

[Kevin Ryan]

Wow. Which was.

[H. Foley]

Didn't compare to the super size. Super size.

[Kevin Ryan]

Well, a few years ago, McDonald's, they did. They brought back a grand Mac. I remember that. And I had. I had a few grand Macs. They were good.

[H. Foley]

I had the chicken one.

[Kevin Ryan]

Really? I was. I thought it was gross. You like what? Me and you may have different differing.

[H. Foley]

Food, which is crazy.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. What hypes you up? What's your death row meal?

[H. Foley]

I don't know if I got to say that, but McDonald's will be on there.

[Glenny Balls]

Really?

[H. Foley]

Yeah. That would be your top fast food.

[Kevin Ryan]

Fast foods. Like, this is a whole nother argument.

[H. Foley]

Kevin, go check out the car or something like that.

[Kevin Ryan]

Fast food. I would say, like, of the big three. McDonald's, Burger King, Wendy's. The big three, McDonald's.

[Glenny Balls]

Not a college conference.

[Kevin Ryan]

But my personal. I mean, my personal favorite. Honestly, my death row food would probably be Outback. Outback Steakhouse.

[Glenny Balls]

Really?

[Kevin Ryan]

I am obsessed with. I've actually been telling my friends that when I. So I'm close to losing 300, 100 pounds for my top weight I've ever been. When I finally hit that hundred, I want to bring Everybody out back for a celebratory meal.

[H. Foley]

But how is your sophisticated palate blending into that corporate chain?

[Glenny Balls]

He's a Long island dirtbag.

[H. Foley]

That's what I was saying that I.

[Kevin Ryan]

Feel you guys are thinking I'm sophisticated.

[Glenny Balls]

No, you're just an old. No, no, no.

[H. Foley]

I do. You're very well spoken, very articulate, but I see what you're saying.

[Kevin Ryan]

Grow. I mean, Blue and onion Outback was my, like, out. Whenever people ask me if I could do an Australian accent, you know what I have to say to them? I could only do it in the Outback. In the Outback. Commercial reservation.

[Glenny Balls]

Okay.

[Kevin Ryan]

Actually, that's your answer for when I did my first reservation. I was pro, 10 years old, calling outback Holy. And I said I would do it. It's the Outback Steakhouse in Island Park. So I would go, good day, mate. Thanks for calling the Outback Steakhouse in Island Park. For call ahead seating, press 1. For curbside to go, press 2.

[H. Foley]

If that's you, Glenn, it's me.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. And that's the only way I could do an Australian accent. I can't say anything else in Australia, but I could do that because I.

[Glenny Balls]

Called so much so many times, and.

[Kevin Ryan]

I went out back a lot. But, I mean, it's so good.

[H. Foley]

You go out with the boys now. Four or five of you, you're at dinner, whatever. How you split up a check.

[Kevin Ryan]

We'll usually just go straight down. Down. I like to go straight down.

[H. Foley]

Split it.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

All the way around.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. Because, I mean, I think everyone has good jobs. I think, sure, we could all swing it. And especially, like, there. Maybe there'll be some nights where I'm not drinking very rarely, but there'll be nights where other guys aren't drinking. And I think it's. What am I gonna be like, oh, it'll wash itself.

[H. Foley]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

Let me take off two. When you're as good as friends as we are, They've been friends for 15 years. Like, I do. I do think it all washes out. It's very, very rare that me and my friends, Venmo. Request anything from each other. Of course.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

I think that's a classic. And that's also a way to lose friends, because people. Some people are a little weird about money.

[H. Foley]

You've been more Christmas for 875. What are we doing?

[Glenny Balls]

Especially, like, before you leave the restaurant or whatever, it's like, you know, hey, you get it. I'll Venmo you. And then it's like, hey, you owe me 1350 you're like, buddy, I'm not even. I'm not even in my car yet.

[Kevin Ryan]

We're very much a goes background comes around type of career. Which is, which is the correct way to be.

[Glenny Balls]

You have to be longevity.

[Kevin Ryan]

It makes me sad when people aren't.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah. But I think those people find each other and it's like, then that's just like, like you're that way with money. So naturally your friends are that way with money. And the people that are a little more. Good tip right with it.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. At least 20% and then let me all go more. But like, like actually like a year, two years ago, I was in Charleston, South Carolina for the first time in my life.

[H. Foley]

Love it.

[Kevin Ryan]

Great place. And I was actually with my best. The guy was best man for I was with his wife and her other friend from high school and her three friends that she lives in Charleston. So it was me and five chicks that I don't know. Like, I'm not talking to any of them. Two of them are my just friend girlfriends from high school.

[H. Foley]

Oh no.

[Kevin Ryan]

How the.

[H. Foley]

Wait, how long wait, it.

[Kevin Ryan]

Was two years ago. So I'm like famous as a dude. Do I have to just pay for this?

[H. Foley]

Yes.

[Kevin Ryan]

Whole bill. I don't even know. I don't even know the other three girls. One of them is married. It was.

[H. Foley]

So what.

[Kevin Ryan]

So I. I had. The girl's name is Sarah. I was like, sarah, what do I do? What do I do here? How do we split this thing up? And she was. I think we all just put our cards in. Thank God.

[Glenny Balls]

I think that's fine.

[Kevin Ryan]

Because women.

[Glenny Balls]

Women are totally fine.

[Kevin Ryan]

Women are scary when it comes to fully.

[Glenny Balls]

It's not the 1940s anymore I'm interested in.

[Kevin Ryan]

I pay for everything.

[Glenny Balls]

A woman I'm interested in.

[H. Foley]

But like I bring the family over.

[Kevin Ryan]

But it's absolutely not where it's girls. I don't know.

[Glenny Balls]

I don't even know. I didn't marry broads.

[H. Foley]

I didn't know.

[Kevin Ryan]

I didn't. Three of them I didn't know. And then two of them are my friends.

[Glenny Balls]

If I don't know somebody and it's like, I. I'm not jumping on a grenade. They wouldn't do it for you.

[Kevin Ryan]

I will say I'm doing it out of some.

[H. Foley]

Like it's not what it's about. Goddamn gentlemen. Let me see this. You're married.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

You're Al at a restaurant on a Sunday after a little event with four ladies that your wife works with. What are you doing there?

[Kevin Ryan]

Oh, that and you're.

[H. Foley]

You do.

[Kevin Ryan]

Well, whoa.

[H. Foley]

You know, that's not automatic.

[Kevin Ryan]

I think you got to pay for. Yeah, you got to pay for it. All right. That's all I wanted to. I want, I want to clarify that. I was going to say that before you said before you insisted that I do it, because I would have said that. I mean, what are you going to do? What are you going to say? We have to split this up. We're going to split it two ways this way. And you guys say the other thing or the other. No. So you would have. I guess you would have to do that. But once again, one of them is your wife, so. Yeah, kind of the same thing. Like I was saying. Like I was just saying that dinner. I was at Charleston. Let's say it was me and my best friend's wife, who's also one of my good friends and our other friend Sarah. If it was just us three, I probably would have paid.

[Glenny Balls]

Jump on that.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. But the three random girls I never.

[Glenny Balls]

Met before, three broads. I ain't never met him. I ain't talking, I ain't interested.

[Kevin Ryan]

Anything about him.

[H. Foley]

Sensible. Always been somewhat sensible. With cash.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, I think I'm pretty good with cash.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah. Any stupid purchase once you started making money. Not even like insane. Not like a yacht or anything, but just something you're like, man, I shouldn't.

[H. Foley]

Have bought that sanity. Life size.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah, that jersey or something. That was a mistake.

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't. I don't really buy too many things. I'll maybe get like a something that's a few hundred bucks. A few weeks ago, I was up at the beach with my buddies and my buddies brother in law had this awesome chair and I said, dude, where'd you get that chair from? I bought that chair.

[H. Foley]

Chair.

[Kevin Ryan]

Oh, during COVID I bought chair. It's awesome. Please call park it. It's fantastic. I just got it delivered the other day. I tried it out. Unbelievable. Perfect.

[H. Foley]

In the backyard.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, I just tried it because it's elevated. There's a cooler on the bottom of it. There's a cup holder. And it holds our build very well.

[H. Foley]

I like it.

[Kevin Ryan]

And I mean during COVID because I was so bored, I bought an inflatable hot tub.

[H. Foley]

With the house or.

[Kevin Ryan]

No, I wish, man.

[Glenny Balls]

Like I said, floating all day long.

[Kevin Ryan]

We had a. We had a little blow up pool growing up. I wish I had a pool. I mean, that's probably my end goal. I would just have a pool, just a nice pool. Because I see all my friends, all these rich kids and they have all sick pools. They don't. They don't even go in them. It's disgusting. It's disgusting to see.

[H. Foley]

It's a very long island thing to say.

[Kevin Ryan]

They don't.

[H. Foley]

They don't. The neighbors, they're not even in it.

[Kevin Ryan]

Don't go in it. They never go in it. All my friends have had great pools. They never go into. They have these beautiful pools and I would die for a pool.

[H. Foley]

Are they all in ground?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

It's my theory. He's gonna push back on this. They're not that great. They get real warm in the, in the summer. Nice above ground, cool water. They'd be in it every day.

[Kevin Ryan]

Sir, all pools matter. I'll take any pools. I will take any pool. But eventually when I'm older, I would.

[H. Foley]

Like get in the ocean for four hours.

[Kevin Ryan]

But I'll have like my end has that. I'm at every Sunday they have an above ground pool. I go on every Sunday. It's beautiful. I just love being in the water. It's a great thing. But anyway. Yeah.

[Glenny Balls]

So do you have a bathing suit or you wearing like basketball?

[Kevin Ryan]

Big time bathing suit.

[Glenny Balls]

But yeah, big time, big time bathing suit.

[Kevin Ryan]

I would love to have a pool. What were we talking about before that? Pools?

[H. Foley]

I can't remember.

[Glenny Balls]

Hot tub.

[Kevin Ryan]

So I got the hot tub during.

[Glenny Balls]

COVID now set that up at the parents house.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, yeah. It was awesome.

[H. Foley]

Is that still there?

[Kevin Ryan]

No, no. I mean it was like four years ago, but it. There was a hole in it. We couldn't find the hole. We would like. We bought stuff on Amazon to like try to soap it down to find where the hole. We couldn't find the hole so we had to throw away. It was worth it. It was worth it. Man, those. Those hot like 700 bucks.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah, they're cheap.

[Kevin Ryan]

I. I got them every night during company.

[H. Foley]

Any pets growing up?

[Kevin Ryan]

We've always had rottweilers. So actually, actually I take that back. Took a left turn when I was. Till I was about 4. We had a blind. A key to.

[Glenny Balls]

Okay.

[Kevin Ryan]

Big dog, Japanese guy, other Japanese. But they were blind. She was a blind Nikita. And then when I was in first grade for Christmas, Santa got me a. Take those down. Santa got me a rottweiler. Her name was Kiara. We had her from when I was in first grade till a senior year in high school.

[Glenny Balls]

Okay.

[Kevin Ryan]

And then we had Madison about two years later. She's another great rottweiler. She was amazing. She was literally like a puppy. Like a poodle in a Rowler's body and she passed away last year. She had bone cancer, Rip. And then literally three weeks ago, I bought my parents a new rottweiler.

[H. Foley]

What? Oh, you got a puppy at the house with the meatloaf and the cutlets?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, she's a menace. She's hella wow. I was up all night because of her last night. She.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah, it's brutal.

[Kevin Ryan]

She's cries every night, but she. I mean, she's in a great house. We treat her well, but she's. She's a menace.

[H. Foley]

I want to move in there.

[Kevin Ryan]

She's a mess.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah, yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

But we just got her and we named her Shay. So she's a. Shay is our new current rottweiler. She's like. I think she was born May 17th.

[Glenny Balls]

Wow.

[H. Foley]

Who's. Where does that come from? Your dad Rottweilers. He trained them or what?

[Kevin Ryan]

No. So actually my uncle owned a candy store in Corona in the 90s and they wanted to get a Rot or a dog just to guard the candy store. So he night. Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Damn.

[Kevin Ryan]

So his buddy had a long haired Rottweiler, which I think like one out of a thousand when they're big long haired rottweilers.

[H. Foley]

Scary.

[Kevin Ryan]

And he got her. Named her Kimbo. So she was. So he got her and he loved her. And then we. So then we got Wilders. We just love rottweiler shits. I love rottweilers.

[H. Foley]

Breaking into a candy store. Rottweiler there. It's like a junkyard.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, she was. No, she would live at the candy store. She didn't even go home. My uncle. She would live in the backyard of the candy store.

[Glenny Balls]

Christ.

[Kevin Ryan]

She was. She was a big friggin. Yeah, she died October 13th. No, October 15th, 2005.

[H. Foley]

Diabetes, I assume. Yeah, she was all candy store.

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't know why. I don't know why. I remember old.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah, it's crazy.

[Kevin Ryan]

You know why? Because she actually passed away the day I remember. I went to my first ranger game. It was October 15, 2005.

[Glenny Balls]

Wow. I mean, this guy high.

[H. Foley]

What was the first concert?

[Kevin Ryan]

Hillary Duff. Okay. First few concerts for Hillary Duff.

[H. Foley]

And that really held up.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. That in fifth grade, my dad took me and my best friend. Which is hilarious to look at in retrospect to. At the Coliseum. It was Danity Kane, Pussycat Dolls and Christina Aguilera.

[Glenny Balls]

I remember that tour.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, it was awesome.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

I mean it was amazing. And then it was June 14th. Yeah, I love the. I mean, did Jay Z growing up trying to think of other concerts.

[Glenny Balls]

Who was the most famous person you met as a kid.

[H. Foley]

Had to be somebody juicy on the island.

[Glenny Balls]

It had to be, like, a kid. It's probably like, we.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm such a big sportsman. Growing up, we used to do, like, the. Like, I would go to, like, steiner sports.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

When I was a kid, I met, like, Henry Colonquist, who's, like, my number one person ever. Yarmouth Yagur. I met them both at the same thing. Henrik. I remember Yaga was 90 for an autograph. Henrik was only 20 at the time.

[H. Foley]

Yikes. Needs the money.

[Kevin Ryan]

Some of the Rangers. I mean, I'm sure I met David Wright growing up. Play baseball stuff.

[Glenny Balls]

Okay.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm trying to think of a. Of a bigger celebrity.

[H. Foley]

Anybody on the news?

[Kevin Ryan]

Good celebrity story, actually.

[H. Foley]

Here we go.

[Kevin Ryan]

When my parents. My parents were in Vegas, I was in my mom's stomach. The Mariners were out one night. I think my parents are playing the Mariners around my mom. My dad made Ken Griffey Jr. Rub my mom's stomach, so.

[Glenny Balls]

No way.

[Kevin Ryan]

Junior Magic.

[H. Foley]

Whoa.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. How about that?

[H. Foley]

There you go.

[Kevin Ryan]

But, yeah, growing up, I don't know if I ever met, like, a real legit famous.

[Glenny Balls]

That's a famous person. I mean, I was looking for, like, somebody who owned Snyder.

[H. Foley]

Walking around Long Island. Anything like that.

[Kevin Ryan]

Oh, well, you know who I saw one day recently? It was not recently. It was probably 2007, 2017, 2018. I was walking to Barstool's old office. I walked by Bourdain. That was pretty sick. Just walked by him. Yeah. Pretty happy about that. I walked by Bourdain. Wow.

[H. Foley]

Didn't say nothing?

[Kevin Ryan]

No. I don't like to say stuff. You don't do it? No. People I really admire scare me. I got anyone. We've had that even at bar so long on Sunday. People scare me. Like, the first person I think I ever saw that freaked me out was Jerry Ferrar from Entourage. And I saw him from across.

[Glenny Balls]

I mean, he's your. He's your Jesus Christ. Being from. You know, I stay from Corona, Queens.

[H. Foley]

Turtle, who was his parents.

[Kevin Ryan]

I saw him from across the way at Barstool. I was like, oh, God, that is.

[Glenny Balls]

I was in the name of the E. The vids.

[H. Foley]

You have a Jerry Ferrar T shirt on, Dude.

[Kevin Ryan]

The people like that, remember at bar. So this was probably 2018, 2019. The cast of the Jersey Shore came in. It was legitimately like Roddy. Like the Beatles came in. It was the office shut down.

[Glenny Balls]

Like, can't work. It looked at the situation.

[Kevin Ryan]

There was a hundred people upstairs just surrounding Them hanging out the window. And it's funny to think about. There's it truly, if I was in a room with. I don't know if I was in a room with Kevin Dillon, who's Johnny Drama or Brad Pitt, I would be. I would be more scared about being in the room with Kevin Dillon.

[H. Foley]

Kevin Dillon. Kevin Dillon had a great part in Platoon back in the day.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. Was it funny or rabbit or something? Right? Yeah.

[H. Foley]

Killed the kid in the hut.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. But yeah, just. Just people that you really like. Artie Lang is a big one for me.

[Glenny Balls]

Sure.

[Kevin Ryan]

He walked by me one day at bars. I put my head down and. Yeah, just people like that. Like, I love people that I love. Derek. We did Sunday with Darius Rucker. I'm a huge Daddy Rucker fan. And who do you need?

[H. Foley]

The Blowfish.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, from my heart.

[Glenny Balls]

From the Mariners. Yeah. Hootie and the Blowfish.

[Kevin Ryan]

Hey, you guys want to hear a sick stories about Daddy Strucker? That was one of the moments of my life that happened to me last year, actually. So last June, I'm in Nashville. I'm going to. I went to a comedy show, and then I go to this place, Sinatra. There's a Sinatra restaurant in Nashville. And I bring this lovely lady that I love to. To the Sinatra place. Obviously, I was trying to impress her.

[H. Foley]

And how much of a gentleman you think he is on a date?

[Kevin Ryan]

Pretty good.

[H. Foley]

Probably smells great. Good shirt.

[Kevin Ryan]

So Sinatra is this awesome place. Very narrow place in Nashville. I walk into my left. Darius is sitting there with two other people.

[Glenny Balls]

And you had already done the show. Oh, come on.

[Kevin Ryan]

He gets up and comes up to me and says, oh, good to see you.

[Glenny Balls]

And I was like, good to see you, Mr. Ball.

[Kevin Ryan]

Dude, get the out of here. That Hootie. Darius Rucker did that. Did you see that?

[Glenny Balls]

She's like.

[Kevin Ryan]

She's.

[Glenny Balls]

She's in the bathroom.

[H. Foley]

Darius, I'm on a date. Back off.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's it. It's like the classic Doc Rickles story. But it was almost like that. It was. I said, do. Dude, did you just see that?

[Glenny Balls]

That was hilarious.

[Kevin Ryan]

Rucker.

[Glenny Balls]

That's great.

[H. Foley]

I mean, I'm taking points away. Hooting the blowfish.

[Kevin Ryan]

You know, like, hooting the blowfish.

[H. Foley]

That was cheeseball.

[Glenny Balls]

He's 50. You're. You're. You're.

[Kevin Ryan]

Wait, so I don't. I don't want to make fun of your age. How old?

[Glenny Balls]

I'm just saying.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm not.

[Glenny Balls]

I'm not making fun of. I mean, what year were you born?

[H. Foley]

He got. He got salty quick what year were you born? 1976.

[Kevin Ryan]

So you were 18 when crack review came out. How did you. How are you not the biggest Hooting of fan ever?

[H. Foley]

You weren't born when that came out.

[Kevin Ryan]

How are you not the biggest Hooting fan to ever live?

[Glenny Balls]

That makes a yes. I didn't think of that. That's when it hit for you, man.

[Kevin Ryan]

18 years old. That's when. That's when Hold My Hand came out.

[Glenny Balls]

You're.

[H. Foley]

You're didn't like it.

[Kevin Ryan]

What you. What you like, what you like?

[H. Foley]

It's all grunge, old 70s and stuff like that. So in my eyes, it was like, whatever.

[Kevin Ryan]

So you were all like, Nirvana?

[H. Foley]

Sure.

[Kevin Ryan]

Stone Temple Pilots, sure.

[H. Foley]

How do you feel about that?

[Kevin Ryan]

He's handling you.

[H. Foley]

How do you.

[Glenny Balls]

We're going have to end this before they. Before they start ramming each other.

[Kevin Ryan]

Wait, why are you saying. I'm not saying I love some type of pilot.

[Glenny Balls]

No, you just.

[H. Foley]

You nailed him.

[Glenny Balls]

Like he is Nirvana.

[H. Foley]

Imagine me and him in an argument. It's. It be like fighting a smarter version of myself. The intimate details.

[Kevin Ryan]

So that's what you like, though.

[Glenny Balls]

Like, that's okay for a guy.

[Kevin Ryan]

Like, what's your dream concert?

[H. Foley]

My dream concert?

[Glenny Balls]

Him on stage playing the guitar.

[Kevin Ryan]

What would be like, what.

[Glenny Balls]

What do you.

[Kevin Ryan]

What music do you like? If I go on your playlist right now, what are you listening to?

[H. Foley]

Nothing. I don't listen to music that much.

[Kevin Ryan]

Okay.

[Glenny Balls]

Sure has a opinion on it, though, I'll tell you that much.

[Kevin Ryan]

I mean, like, not like I was.

[H. Foley]

Listen, I was just saying it on a garbage scale.

[Kevin Ryan]

Not like a Hooting. The Blowfish is like. It's. They got kind of nickelbacked, I think, and it's fucked up.

[Glenny Balls]

I don't disagree.

[H. Foley]

All right, so I'm not crazy.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, no, they definitely. People had that feeling for them for a while. I think they're kind of back now because they've been touring. I went to the tour a few years ago. They're great. And.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah, listen, Hooting, the Blowfish, Glenn, you don't know him that well. If Hootie and the Blowfish walked up to him when he was on a date, he had a Outback Steakhouse, he'd be slipping out of his seat. All right, so you don't have to defend yourself. You're right. Right. You're all class. And I love the out of you, baby.

[H. Foley]

I know your English ain't good, but.

[Glenny Balls]

That'S Darius record good friend of mine.

[Kevin Ryan]

She speaks fluent English, but that was pretty cool. That was Amazing that in the boo in the window and I didn't mean to. No, that and the boob in the window were two of my top moments.

[Glenny Balls]

Love it.

[H. Foley]

What do you think?

[Glenny Balls]

So all class. What are you talking about?

[Kevin Ryan]

That was a great compliment.

[H. Foley]

He's all class, buddy. You are.

[Glenny Balls]

I mean, sharp. Yeah. Well put together. I'm sure he's got dirt under the fingernails just like everybody else. He's Long island blanket. Not your actual fingernails, just in general. But yeah, I mean all class. Calculated. Well, you know kids. Good, good kid.

[H. Foley]

You have one of those little brushes in the shower you do the nails with.

[Kevin Ryan]

No, I'm. No.

[H. Foley]

Is there anything garbage wise you think that we never got to.

[Kevin Ryan]

Or garbage.

[H. Foley]

What skeletons are in a closet?

[Kevin Ryan]

So my question to you guys is garbage being is good, right?

[Glenny Balls]

It's good. It's. Welcome to the party. We're all derp. We all. We think everybody's garbage and so's being classy.

[Kevin Ryan]

So you've given me the verdict yet?

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah, I think you're all class. Listen, you're.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm not garbage.

[Glenny Balls]

You are. Listen, you are Long Island.

[Kevin Ryan]

You're from long. Yeah, yeah.

[Glenny Balls]

You're a Long island dirt bag.

[H. Foley]

You're trying, but, but you're doing your parents basement.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I mean like, listen, I can, I can easily spin this narrative that you are a full fledged dirt bag.

[Kevin Ryan]

I want to be garbage. Sure.

[H. Foley]

But if you go that route, the whole eastern seaboard's getting away.

[Glenny Balls]

I know, but you're.

[H. Foley]

We gotta have guys like you that know how to.

[Glenny Balls]

You're trying, you're trying. You're, you're, you're, you're well thought out. You're, you're, you're very, you know, forward thinking. You're doing well. Not even like career wise. Just like you love Outback Steakhouse. You do. Are you enjoy it? For sure.

[H. Foley]

It's okay.

[Glenny Balls]

You know what I mean?

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[Glenny Balls]

Are you also a guy who's, you know, well put together? You're taking broads out to Sinatra, you know, aioli. You're doing the whole thing. You're. You're a good kid. You're good.

[H. Foley]

Exactly.

[Glenny Balls]

Walks in both worlds. Good kid.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, I'll take that. I just want to be a little garbage.

[Glenny Balls]

For sure, for sure.

[H. Foley]

Don't worry.

[Glenny Balls]

But you're doing good.

[Kevin Ryan]

I feel like you guys. Yeah, I was worried you guys were acting like I'm some sort of like southern kid that has a rich. Like that comes from.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah. You had an inflatable hot tub in your parents backyard. You're sleeping in the giant's locker room in your basement. You're a dirt bag.

[H. Foley]

I like it. We couldn't find the hole in the area. The big toenail probably down there.

[Kevin Ryan]

Okay, that. That's perfect. Yeah, I'll take all. I'll take all class. That's one of my favorite compliments. I always say all very sharp and I just wanna.

[H. Foley]

You're 29.

[Kevin Ryan]

One thing I would always say is I would love to leave people. And they'd be like, oh, that guy's a good hang.

[Glenny Balls]

You're a good. You're a good shit.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, that would be. That would be my ideal compliment in life. I don't want to get handsome. I'm not handsome. I don't want to get your good. I just want to be like, yeah, that guy's a fun time.

[Glenny Balls]

He's a good.

[H. Foley]

Anything else about Del Mar Beach? You want to let them know?

[Kevin Ryan]

Del Mar beach is in San Diego. California.

[H. Foley]

Stay away.

[Kevin Ryan]

No, Great place. I was just there.

[H. Foley]

The worst watermelon martinis ever had.

[Kevin Ryan]

The Pacific Ocean. Overrated though. Very too cold.

[Glenny Balls]

I don't just. I don't.

[Kevin Ryan]

You can't go in it.

[H. Foley]

I don't know. That's like an alien thing to me. The Pacific Ocean. Hawaii. You'd love Hawaii.

[Kevin Ryan]

Never been. I would think. I would love Poke.

[H. Foley]

Home run. Get it at the grocery store.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's where you got to go. All the diner Jarvis and Dives episodes that he can go to get Poke on there.

[Glenny Balls]

You're really. You're really losing your classy hold on classy judgment by.

[H. Foley]

Here's the problem. You're going to go down. You're going to have it back to that other place. Not going touch it.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's the only thing I. I stay true to my Sherry Blossom. I'm a loyal guy.

[H. Foley]

But the Pacific. O in California. Drop off.

[Kevin Ryan]

Dark. Cold in California. Sharks. It's really cold in California.

[H. Foley]

See, he's a sharp guy.

[Glenny Balls]

I just been saying that. That we got to wrap it up here.

[Kevin Ryan]

Thanks, guys.

[Glenny Balls]

Yeah, of course.

[Kevin Ryan]

This is real fun. I appreciate it.

[Glenny Balls]

I love you, brother. This was fantastic.

[H. Foley]

Kb, what do you got for him?

[Glenny Balls]

Guys, we're on the. We're gearing up for the tour in September. All tickets available at all your garbage dot com. We'll see you out there.

[H. Foley]

What a home run.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[H. Foley]

I was shocked. I was surprised. I love you, Glenny Balls. We love you. Hey, gang.

[Kevin Ryan]

I love you guys.

[H. Foley]

We'll see you next week.

[Glenny Balls]

Peace.