Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast

Episode: Late Credit Card Payments!
Hosts: Kevin Ryan & H. Foley
Date: December 1, 2025

Episode Overview

In this “family episode” of Are You Garbage?, hosts Kevin Ryan and H. Foley dive deep into personal finance disasters, old-school dirtbag habits, and the chaos of trying (and failing) to become responsible adults. This slice-of-life, self-roast heavy episode features a running saga of late credit card payments (primarily Kevin’s), tales of trashy gift-giving, unconventional ways to survive financial hardship, and the classic game show style “garbage” declarations the show is known for. Throughout, they’re joined by producer Luke Dempsey, who gets roped into the fiscal drama and family-style ribbing.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Trashy Financial Woes & Credit Card Fails

Timestamps: roughly 03:00 – 14:00

• Kevin admits to late payments on his Venmo credit card for the fourth month in a row. He can only pay the minimum using funds that have run dry, asking his co-hosts to “Venmo me money so I can make a payment today.”
• Plaid, linking banks, and modern trash: The hosts riff on the awkwardness of linking questionable banks to payment apps, noting:
  • “You use that Plaid to link your bank?” - Kevin (05:21)
  • “That's so trashy. What the fuck?” - Foley (06:15)
• The generational divide:
  • Kevin describes Venmo’s millennial-friendly tone (“Yo, bro. What's up, Pockets?”) vs. American Express’s intimidating mailers (“Mr. Foley, to whom it may concern…”).
• Workarounds and pettiness:
  • Kevin discusses scraping together petty cash and the awkwardness, plus the toll of mounting minimum payments and incessant credit dings.
  • Luke Dempsey reveals he has old, unpaid Venmo requests to Kevin, showing the tightrope they all walk between business, friendship, and financial chaos.

Notable Quote:

“I've just been making the minimum payment now. But ... now I don't have any money in my Venmo. So one of you has to Venmo me money so I can make a payment today. I assume I'm looking at the Dempsey Group for this one.”
— Kevin Ryan [08:04]

2. Banking, Bill Avoidance, and Grown-Up (Trash) Habits

Timestamps: 19:37 – 24:47

• Garbage strategies for bills after changing banks:
  • Both admit to letting companies “find them” for updated card info after switches and ignore update requests.
  • “If they really need it, they'll come find me. I operate the same way.” — Kevin (20:12)
• Dreading paperwork and adult responsibilities:
  • Foley confesses to not changing addresses or opening mail, which only delivers bad news anyway.
• Living on the “edge” with late notices:
  • The color of your collection envelope tells all: “Getting a yellow one is scary.” — Foley (22:29)
  • Kevin: “Something bright red. Yikes.” (22:31)
  • Letting the anxiety go: “You become so broke that it's like, you can't shut it down ... I've defaulted on student loan. I've done everything.” — Kevin (22:38)

3. Blue-Collar Life & Gift-Giving Garbage

Timestamps: 27:00 – 47:00

Early Slurpee Rules & Lunch Timing

• Slurpee etiquette:
  • A hotly debated topic—earliest “gentlemanly” time for a Slurpee (11am per Foley).
  • But Kevin calls out that for early shift laborers, all bets are off:

    “If you're up at six—not one day, but a multiple days—your lunchtime gets shifted up. I'd be doing a hot dog, 10am.” — Kevin (27:16)

The Gift Bag & Tissue Paper Debate

• Saving and recycling tissue paper:
  • A crucial “dirtbag move” according to Kevin who always has a bag but never tissue paper and must raid his mom’s closet last minute.
• Improvisational wrapping:
  • Foley: “That tissue paper... you open that shit up, you're never folding that back nice.” (44:54)
• Absolute chaos:
  • Kevin jams gifts into whatever bags are around, sometimes with the box sticking halfway out and a handful of rogue tissue paper—generally agreed to be “garbage, but relatable.”
• Regifting etiquette: It's considered completely fine among the boys.

4. Root Beer Floats, Milkshakes, and ‘Fat Guy Secrets’

Timestamps: 49:30 – 57:00

• Is making two root beer floats a night “garbage” or not?
  • Foley loves it. Kevin is unimpressed and slams the very essence of a root beer float:

    “I gotta be honest with you ... I think I've only had one, one time, I go, this is a shitty version of ice cream and soda. You're crazy.” — Kevin (50:43)

• Milkshake After Dinner—Taboo or Genius?
  • A deeply silly debate about why Italian restaurants don’t serve Neapolitan milkshakes. Kevin:

    “Why can't you get a milkshake as dessert at an Italian restaurant? ... You're telling me I can't go to quality Italian where you get a chicken parm pizza and a tiramisu, but a cheesecake milkshake is out of the question?” (55:06)

• Fat Guy Knowledge:
  • Foley expresses disbelief Kevin even knows what Neapolitan is, showcasing their endless low-stakes rivalry.

5. Childhood, Avoidance, and Classic Garbage Moves

Timestamps: 28:14 – 64:00

• Classic stories:
  • Using the shower to heat the bedroom. Foley: “I’m all for running it five minutes to warm up the bathroom. I like that.” (35:33)
  • Kevin’s resourceful: “To not wet the floor? I'll step on whatever I'm not, like, wearing.” (39:22)
• Old school dirtbag upbringing:
  • Not opening mail on purpose, hiding bills in drawers, running from responsibility.
  • Family strategies for ignoring phone calls from creditors. “My dad had a great line. Someone's like, I'll take your ass to court or something. He goes, get in line. That also goes around the block.” (22:54)
• Vintage video gaming:
  • Foley and Ryan reminisce about Sega, Genesis, and being beaten at Goldeneye because Kevin never grinds solo.

Notable Quotes and Memorable Moments

“Garbage” Wisdom

• On creditors chasing updated cards:

  “If they really need it, they'll come find me. I operate the same way.” — Kevin Ryan (20:12)

• On financial anxiety:

  “You become so broke that it's like, you can't shut it down ... I've defaulted on student loan. I've done everything.” — Kevin (22:38)

• On overdraft charges:

  “You're telling me I buy a pack of gum for a dollar, you charge me $35 on top of that?” — Liam, quoted by Kevin (10:58)

• On early lunches:

  “I'd be doing a hot dog. 10:00am.” — Kevin Ryan (27:22)

• On regifting bags:

  “Those are getting passed around like fuckin’ loose cigarettes in jail.” — Kevin (45:14)

• Milkshake vs. Root Beer Float:

  “Why aren't they doing [milkshakes] for dessert at Italian restaurants?... I'm not saying you're anti-milkshake, but you're not pro-milkshake.” — Kevin [56:06–58:04]

Classic Foley One-Liners

• On letting bills slide:

  “It's hard to beat a man with no fear.” (23:16)

• On warming the bathroom:

  “My shower ain't going to pull the chips out of Taiwan. Guys are on your own.” (36:07)

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 03:00 – 14:00: Kevin’s late credit card woes, bill paying struggles, and Venmo drama
• 19:37 – 24:47: Avoiding bill updates, growing up dodging mail
• 27:00 – 28:30: Early lunches and Slurpee timing debate
• 35:05 – 39:00: Using the shower as room heat, garbage bathmat solutions
• 44:39 – 47:47: Gift bag and tissue paper recycling etiquette
• 49:30 – 57:00: Root beer float and milkshake showdowns
• 63:08 – End: Reliving childhood game systems, Goldeneye standoffs

Tone and Style

True to AYG form, the episode is marked by self-deprecating humor, blunt honesty about being “trash,” a distinct working-class Philly flavor, and a rapid-fire barrage of bits. Banter, quick-witted asides, and playful insults abound—anchored by the duo’s chemistry and comedic timing.

Conclusion

If you’ve ever juggled bill collectors, borrowed (or gifted) money via Venmo, botched holiday wrapping jobs, or survived on minimum payments and nostalgia, this episode serves as both a cathartic confessional and a stand-up, blue-collar testament. The hosts prove yet again: sometimes, being “garbage” just means being real.