Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast

Episode: Ms. Pat Returns!
Date: November 13, 2025
Hosts: Kevin Ryan & H. Foley
Guest: Ms. Pat

Overview

In this riotous reunion, Ms. Pat returns to the "Are You Garbage?" studio to face the infamous test once more. With both candor and comedic ferocity, she discusses her glow-up since last time—plus the realities of wealth, lingering “garbage” habits, her massive dream house, Black Thanksgiving versus white Thanksgiving, and a masterclass in southern thrifty living. Plus, she dispenses wild travel stories, family life chronicles, and unfiltered takes on food, shopping, and everything in between. The boys attempt to finally decide: Is Ms. Pat still "garbage"? Or has she officially become classy?

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Ms. Pat’s House: From the Block to the Palace

• Home Upgrades: Ms. Pat details building her new 15,000 sq ft house with 13 bathrooms and 11 bedrooms, acting as her own general contractor and sourcing designs from TikTok “white lady” décor pages.
  • “I just went down white women pages and stole their living room, their bathroom, their kitchen.” – Ms. Pat [07:36]
• Strategic Shopping: She reveals secrets behind HomeGoods runs—knowing when trucks come in, hustling deals, and being “uppity but not Hobby Lobby.”
  • “You have to beat them white bitches to that stove, they will get to that store and buy everything...I already got y’all strategy from coupons.” – Ms. Pat [08:07]

2. Family, Hospitality, and the Art of Saying ‘No’

• Ms. Pat houses four of her niece’s kids, her 25-year-old son in a finished basement (“a movie theater, a kitchen”), plus her daughter in a separate on-property house.
• Visitor Policy: Pool house is off limits; guests are gently but firmly shown the door after a weekend:
  • “You can visit, but you can’t stay.” – Ms. Pat [23:35]
• Dog Life: Her dogs have their own house, cable, and air conditioning.

3. Wealthy but Still "Garbage": Frugal Habits Die Hard

• Thrifty Queen: Still couponing, still buying discounted household items (bought an entire Home Depot’s worth of crushed-box trash bags), and freezing packs of Nathan’s hot dogs when on sale.
  • “If I see something on clearance, I buy the whole shelf.” – Ms. Pat [47:59]
• Stockpiling for the Apocalypse: Whole garage full of deep freezers, food, and supplies—just in case.
  • “I think the apocalypse is coming...so I put this whole shelving thing in my garage...packing it with supplies...so I put three deep freezers in my garage.” – Ms. Pat [52:38]
• Multiple Cars: Nine vehicles including a G-Wagon (tax write-off), Lexus (“cheaper to maintain”), and custom 70s Chevelles.

4. Bougie Water & Secret Recipes

• How to Drink LaCroix Like a Pro:
  • “It’s better when you drink it ghetto. You gotta put a Crystal Light in it...Boy, that'll make your dick hard.” – Ms. Pat [03:24]
• Black Thanksgiving vs. White Thanksgiving:
  • “If you ever go to a Black Thanksgiving, you will cuss white people the fuck out. That cornbread stuffing y’all be eating, that is bullshit. We make chicken dressing...from scratch.” – Ms. Pat [27:44]

5. Life on the Road & Travel Flexes

• Delta Diamond/360 Status:
  • “You know the thing about being 360, when you have a problem, they take care of it.” – Ms. Pat [30:44]
• VIP Airport Lifestyle: Gets driven directly to the plane to avoid crowds—and photo requests:
  • “I don't want to say, look, leave me alone...So I just go VIP.” – Ms. Pat [31:59]
• Plane Etiquette: No shoes off, ever; no bringing food except snacks (“I’m in first class, so if I’m flying far, I’m gonna eat regardless.”) [36:38]

6. Financial Hacks, Credit Card Points, and Side Advice

• AMEX Platinum & Ritz-Carlton Cards: Knows all the credit hacks—bags fly free for her whole party, six Amex cards, even the “mirror face” Platinum.
• Advises hiring “a good gay guy that’s a girl and a boy” for business management:
  • “They gonna save you some money. I said that. I sure did.” – Ms. Pat [44:53]

7. Ms. Pat Fan Celebration

• Annual Fan Party: Throws a three-day, $200-250 per-head bash for fans from around the world—costume parties, food, private comedy—funded by liquor collected from club riders.
  • “I put all of this alcohol in my rider...They get Top. Top Chef alcohol...I have it all set up from a party to a podcast.” – Ms. Pat [64:16]

8. Running Jokes, Candid Confessions, and Verbal Fireworks

• Food and Snacks:
  • Favorite hot dogs: “I eat Nathan’s, but you can get them on sale. So I wait till they on sale at Kroger and I buy the shit out of them.” [47:11]
  • Hates bread and butter pickles: “Don’t nobody eat that. Who eat that? You’ll never catch that in no Black household, baby. That is nasty.” [59:00]
• Plane Nuts:
  • “It is work sucking a fat man penis because it’s so warm down there. And they balls are like...it’s like it’s been in a little...they hot.” – Ms. Pat [34:14]
• On Black Female White Men Pairings:
  • “Black women are getting into white men.” – Ms. Pat [35:37]

9. Final Verdict – Still Garbage?

• After a rollicking parade of habits, shows of both class and “garbage”—Hosts and Ms. Pat duel over her “garbage” status:
  • “With 17 Christmas trees—how are we going to call you garbage?” – Kevin [29:27]
  • “My underwear finally match and I’m garbage?” – Ms. Pat [68:41]

Notable Quotes & Moments (with Timestamps)

• On hard limits in decorating:

  • “No, I don’t [have ‘Live Laugh Love’ signs]. That’s trailer park. I said uppity white women. I don’t do no Hobby Lobby crap on the wall.” – Ms. Pat [08:12]

• On buying dogs outside Walmart:

  • “I bought a little acidoodle from Walmart.” – Ms. Pat [25:13]

• On her post-poor shopping habits:

  • “If I see something on clearance, I buy the whole shelf.” – Ms. Pat [47:59]

• On fridge organization breakdown in her mansion:

  • “I have two under counter refrigerators. So I have one for the water and the drinks...another one just for my husband’s beer and wine.” – Ms. Pat [16:35]

• On luxury and apocalypse prepping in one breath:

  • “I think the apocalypse is coming...so I put this whole shelving thing in my garage...packing it with food and supplies and bleach and Kotex and tampon in case we got to take off and run through the woods.” – Ms. Pat [52:38]

• On Black Thanksgiving food:

  • “That cornbread stuffing y’all be eating, that is bullshit. We make chicken dressing or either gizzard dressing...from scratch.” – Ms. Pat [27:44][28:14]

• On refusing guests to overstay:

  • “You can visit, but you can’t stay...I have no problem saying you gotta go.” – Ms. Pat [23:35]

• On peak credit card flex:

  • “Bring me my mirror face American Express card!” – Ms. Pat [39:13]

Timestamps for Key Sections

• Ms. Pat’s Home & Décor: [07:00–12:00]
• Family & Guest Boundaries: [20:00–24:00]
• Home Good/Thrifty Life: [08:00; 47:00–50:00]
• Black Thanksgiving vs. White: [27:40–28:49]
• Travel Tips & VIP Lounge Stories: [30:30–34:00]
• Credit Card Knowledge/Flex: [39:00–44:00]
• Epic Fan Party Discussion: [64:00–68:00]
• Final Garbage Status Duel: [68:19–69:41]

Tone and Energy

This episode is fast-talking, brutally honest, and packed with laugh-out-loud moments and wild personal anecdotes. Ms. Pat holds nothing back—whether roasting white people’s baking skills, talking about her “ghetto LaCroix,” or describing the heat generated by Foley’s “fat man balls.” Foley and Ryan gamely ride the rollercoaster, peppering Ms. Pat with garbage tests and marveling at her combination of hustler thrift and high-end taste. Despite her mansion and platinum cards, Ms. Pat insists her roots (and “garbage” quirks) keep her grounded—and hilarious.

Bottom Line

Is Ms. Pat still "garbage"?

• Hosts say: “100% garbage. But I love you.” [68:22]
• Ms. Pat protests: Underwear finally matches, 13 bathrooms—she’s “classy.”
• Verdict: With her mix of mansion life, coupon-crazed stockpiling, and pure authenticity, Ms. Pat is the poster child for high-achieving “Garbage”—and nobody does it funnier.

Don’t miss:

• Crystal Light tips [03:23]
• HomeGoods white-women strategic infighting [08:07]
• Pool house visitor policies [23:05]
• “Black people make the cornbread stuffing from scratch...” [27:44]
• First-class airport stories [30:44]
• Apocalypse prep tips [52:38]
• "My daughter lives in the podcast house" [20:30]