Are You Garbage? Patreon Episode: "Foley’s Fashion Show!" | FULL
Hosts: Kevin Ryan & H. Foley
Date: January 9, 2026
Episode Overview
This bonus Patreon episode of Are You Garbage? is a raucous, off-the-cuff hangout where hosts Kevin Ryan and H. Foley embark on a surprise fashion intervention for Foley, putting his notorious lack of style to the ultimate test. With their producer and pals in tow, the gang delivers a blend of heartfelt teasing, classic blue-collar banter, and hilarious outfit try-ons. The episode pivots around Foley's "fashion show," but also delivers the signature freewheeling stories and garbage-classy debates fans love.
Key Discussion Points & Segments
1. Warm-up Banter & Life Updates (00:00–04:43)
- The hosts kick things off acknowledging their "garbage" lifestyle and trading friendly jabs.
- Foley shares updates on his upcoming film project, referencing his new mustache and efforts to prep for filming (02:13).
- No one has noticed the mustache:
"No one's asked about it. It's completely just a beard now." — Foley (02:24)
2. Setting the Stage: Foley’s Fashion Intervention (04:44–10:46)
- Kevin and the team reveal that they've orchestrated a secret fashion makeover for Foley, who is famously resistant to style changes.
- Foley reacts with both dread and reluctant excitement:
"I'm like the fattest 7 year old. I don't know. This could all be prosciutto in here." — Foley (07:22)
- It's revealed he’s not wearing socks or underwear, prompting a barrage of ribbing.
Notable Quote
"We're getting you ready for the ball, little lady." — Kevin (06:18)
3. Foley’s Fashion Show: Wardrobe Roast & Try-Ons (10:47–21:21)
- Foley tries on various new clothes sourced from DXL (a big & tall retailer), with the crew giving real-time feedback.
- Humorous discomfort over sizes and styles, including a flashy “Guido” button-up, numerous polos, and jeans.
- Kevin and others tease Foley for his lack of staples, overreliance on old tees, and rejection of “adult” style.
Highlights & Jokes:
- Running gag about Foley looking like a magician, car rental employee, or an overgrown kid.
- "That's Robert Graham, Teddy Graham's brother. It's an offshoot. Like a wedding or something. Like a nice dinner." — Kevin (14:14)
- “How do you feel? …They look a little tight.” — Kevin, on Foley’s jeans (19:18)
Frequent Roasts:
- Foley’s distaste for polos: "Do I work at a fucking car rental place? ... That’s not my style." — Foley (11:14)
- On price: “How much is that? What's the price tag say?” "155." "Are you fucking kidding?" — Kevin & Foley (14:38–14:44)
- On fit: “That shirt is a little big now that you’re sitting in it.” — Kevin (26:31)
4. The DXL Outing & Retail Therapy (21:22–26:13)
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The guys recount the chaos of shopping for Foley at DXL.
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Stories about the sales associates and Foley’s customer file:
"If you go to a local DXL, you give them your phone number, all your stuff is saved in there. Fucking rats." — Kevin (07:29)
- Staff didn't remember Foley by photo; playful grudge voiced.
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Discussion of the DXL work environment and employee perks:
“Probably see what the employee discount is over there at the xl. ... That’s not bad perk.” — Kevin (23:38)
5. Transition to Business & Adulting Mishaps (26:14–40:46)
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Foley talks about dry cleaning, networking with "powerful people," prepping for meetings, and his neuroses regarding bringing new things home.
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A running bit develops about him never taking gifts or clothes home from the studio—emblematic of his avoidance tendencies.
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Foley reveals he finally got his REAL ID, recounting the arduous DMV trip, with Ryan as support.
“Set the appointment, did the paperwork, told me what to bring, all that kind of stuff. And he's waiting down there for me with a fucking... egg bites and a cold brew.” — Foley (43:30)
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Discussion: awkward moments at the DMV, missing paperwork, and Foley's flirting with the DMV staff (47:00–47:09).
Contrasting Management at DXL
"That's pretty fucked up to only pay a manager $3 more an hour and deal with all that shit... I ain't fucking listening to you." — Kevin (24:28)
6. Tech Mishaps & NYC Hustle: The Sponsor Call Fiasco (40:47–58:47)
- Kevin details a disaster morning rushing from an Uber, spilling coffee in his laptop, missing a sponsor call, and running through the city:
"I start fucking running. …It looks like you just knocked over a jewelry store." — Foley (55:23)
- Typical "Are You Garbage" relatability: fighting tech, scheduling chaos, old habits die hard.
Great Anecdote
- Multiple recountings of Kevin and Foley both being late/struggling with paperwork, leading to comedic finger-pointing and classic garbage energy.
7. Closing Reflections & Takeaways (58:47–End)
- Foley’s genuine gratitude for the intervention:
"Can't thank you guys enough. This was so much fun, and I appreciate it." — Foley (58:47)
- Kev and the crew tease whether Foley will ever actually wear the new clothes outside the studio.
- They wrap with a reminder to catch the next episode and thank their Patreon family.
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
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On wardrobe sabotage:
"Did you get pants? Son of a bitch. Let's do it." — Foley (08:44) -
On wardrobe upgrades:
"That fits you nice. And you look cool." — Kevin (13:36) -
Self-awareness:
"I'm just lazy. ...I always want to push it off. Whatever it is." — Foley (30:03) -
On retail work:
"That's not bad perk. ... Probably see what the employee discount is over there at the xl." — Kevin (23:38) -
On technology:
"I don't get Google alerts." — Foley (50:40)
Timestamps for Key Segments
| Segment | Timestamp | |---------------------------------------------|-------------| | Podcast intro & catch-up | 00:00–04:43 | | Fashion show setup & Foley's dread | 04:44–10:46 | | Fashion show (try-ons & roasts) | 10:47–21:21 | | DXL shopping trip & employment talk | 21:22–26:13 | | Dry cleaning, closet avoidance, meetings | 26:14–40:46 | | REAL ID, DMV misadventures, support roles | 40:47–47:09 | | Tech panic & sponsor call story | 55:23–58:47 | | Wrap-up, new gear gratitude, closing | 58:47–end |
Tone & Style
The episode is classic "Are You Garbage?"—busting chops, blue-collar camaraderie, and zero ego about their own foibles. Much of the content is built on mutual ribbing, inside jokes, and genuine affection for one another. The “fashion show” stunt allows for escalating physical comedy and self-mockery, with everyone playing up their “garbage” credentials while still rooting for each other to step up and succeed (or at least look presentable).
For New Listeners
If you haven’t experienced Are You Garbage? before, this episode captures the show’s heart: relentless but loving ridicule among friends, nostalgic and working-class anecdotes, and the subtle celebration of being a little bit “garbage.” Even without video, the palpable affection and unpolished realness make the chaos of Foley’s fashion show a hilarious, relatable highlight.
