Pulling Pizza Scams w/ Ryan Sickler

Summary

Are You Garbage? – “Pulling Pizza Scams w/ Ryan Sickler”

Hosts: Kevin Ryan & H. Foley
Guest: Ryan Sickler
Release Date: October 30, 2025

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Episode Overview

This episode of Are You Garbage? dives into classic dirtbag antics, blue-collar nostalgia, and comedic scams with returning favorite Ryan Sickler. The hosts and their guest explore personal histories of pizza hustles, family memories, questionable travel habits, and “garbage” antics from their upbringings. Ryan gets candid and hilarious about growing up with little money, hustling for free pizza, forging signatures, dealing with heartbreak, and climbing the comedy mountain—all while being proudly, undeniably garbage.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. TWA Hotel Stories & Airport Living

• The episode opens with a spirited discussion about airport hotels, specifically the TWA Hotel at JFK, with Sickler recounting his affinity for its gym and infinity pool.

  • “Anytime I'm in pain these days, I can go work out. ... I'm walking now.” — Ryan Sickler [03:32]
  • “It's an infinity pool that's heated. Like, hot tub water. And it overlooks the airport.” — Ryan Sickler [04:32]

• The crew riff on the “classiness” of the TWA and the low-level scams and mix-ups at airport food courts.

  • “I got into a beef with the guy at the food counter.” — Kevin Ryan [05:00]

2. Legendary Pizza Scams

• Sickler reveals a “garbage” hack from the '80s—claiming to find hair on a delivered pizza to get free replacements, a scam he shamelessly repeated at new addresses.
  • “You can only do this once if you… unless you move.” — Ryan Sickler [09:11]
  • “We get excited to move. I'm like, guess what we're getting for the next two weeks? Free pizza.” — Ryan Sickler [11:35]
  • This segment becomes a core, recurring theme: maximizing opportunity, living rough, and laughing about it.

3. Growing Up Hustling: Sickler Family Edition

• Heavy on sickler’s stories of growing up in a single-parent household with his two brothers, experiencing hardship (his father’s death at 16), and hustling for every edge—whether pizza, honor roll personal pans, or car insurance discounts.
  • “From 16 on... the three of us are just living by ourselves in this house.” — Ryan Sickler [12:16]
  • “If you got a 3.0 or higher... you got a free personal pan.” — Ryan Sickler [13:06]
  • The trio reminisce on Pizza Hut sit-downs, gym class A’s, math struggles, and the importance of a working-class mentality.

4. Best & Worst School Memories

• The hosts and Sickler trade stories of cheating, flunking math, and creative academic scams—sometimes leading to unexpectedly heartfelt moments.
  • “Sometimes it's all right to cheat kids. Sometimes it's ally.” — Ryan Sickler [25:58]
  • Sickler tells a moving story of forging his late father’s signature, which inadvertently resulted in the last photo ever taken of his dad—a story full of both comedy and heart.
    • “That’s the Last photo ever taken of our dad. ... if we both don't forge, ... we don't get that picture. Is that wild?” — Ryan Sickler [25:36]

5. Fast Food, Pop Culture, and Iconic Garbage

• The conversation turns to fast food history, Hamburger University, and the joy of fake nostalgia (i.e., pop-up McDowell’s from Coming to America). The vibe is proudly lowbrow and full of inside jokes.
  • “There was a place called Bob's Classy Lady. ... and back then they had the early stream and no one gave a ... about the Ravens.” — Ryan Sickler [47:04]
  • “They did a McDowell’s. ... you could go in and get a Big Mick and all that.” — Ryan Sickler [29:33]

6. Travel Habits: Pure Garbage or Classy?

• In classic AYG style, the hosts quiz Sickler on airport and hotel behaviors—Are you eating at the gate? Bringing a cheesesteak through TSA? Putting food through the x-ray?
  • “I do love warm food food. But I like a cold cheese stick. So do I. I love it. Purposely wrap it up in foil ... I'll bust out cheesesteak.” — Ryan Sickler [34:51]
  • “I have a rule. I can't put food through the X ray machine.” — Kevin Ryan [36:03]

7. Home Comforts & New Money Upgrades

• The guys talk home upgrades, with Sickler revealing his “new money” moves—putting a TV in the bathroom, installing a bidet, and holding onto a hospital shower seat for comfort and nostalgia.
  • “These days, I don't need the radio anymore. I will watch... Sunday Ticket on in the toilet or the MLB package.” — Ryan Sickler [46:39]
  • “I got the full bidet, heated seat plugged in. All of it.” — Ryan Sickler [51:59]

8. The Garbage Test: Rapid Fire Q&A

• The show’s signature segment asks about:
  • Eating at airport restaurants
  • Bringing food from home
  • Swimming at motel pools
  • Owning rat tails or mullets
  • Using bidets
  • Handling mail for former tenants
  • Taking pictures in front of cars that aren't yours
  • Best dirtbag flexes involving cars, bathrooms, and more
  • “Have you ever taken a picture in front of a car that wasn't yours?” — [57:49]

9. The Honda Civic & the Playboy Mansion

• The episode climaxes with Sickler’s epic story of his beloved 1990 Honda Civic, his neighbor who was “Hugh Hefner’s number two zookeeper”, and the surreal moment of parking at the Playboy Mansion.
  • “So I pull this in there and she goes. ... Take a picture. You don't get to park in the driveway at the Playboy Mansion. So boom, I take a picture.” — Ryan Sickler [63:01]
  • The car, which traveled over 300,000 miles, becomes a symbol for Sickler’s whole journey: starting with nothing, hustling always, and making something special (and funny) out of the chaos.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Garbage Mentality:
  “We get excited to move. I'm like, guess what we're getting for the next two weeks? Free pizza.” – Ryan Sickler [11:41]
  “Sometimes it's all right to cheat kids. Sometimes it's ally.” – Ryan Sickler [25:58]

• On Last Family Photo:
  “If we both don't forge ... we don't get that picture of our dad. Is that wild?” – Ryan Sickler [25:36]

• On Being Blue Collar:
  “He's a blue-collar guy. I'm like, it's just a shirt.” — Ryan Sickler [08:09]

• On Cold Cheesesteaks:
  “I do love warm food, but I like a cold cheesesteak. ... I'll bust that out and eat it.” — Ryan Sickler [34:51]

• On Hotel Pools:
  “I was a lifeguard. ...I’ll definitely do that [swim in a hotel pool].” — Ryan Sickler [39:37–43:11]

• On Bathroom Luxuries:
  “I got the full bidet, heated seat plugged in. All of it.” – Ryan Sickler [51:59]
  “I sit it under my rain shower, and I just watch football.” – Ryan Sickler [52:39]

• Playboy Mansion Story:
  “You don't get to park in the driveway at the Playboy Mansion. So boom, I take a picture. ... That's the Honda Civic at the Playboy Mansion right there, y’all.” – Ryan Sickler [63:01]
  “That’s where it all started. And that’s what got us here.” – Ryan Sickler, on his Honda Civic photo [65:26]

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Timestamps for Essential Segments

• Opening banter, TWA Hotel & airport gyms: 00:24–04:48
• Pizza scam origin stories: 09:01–11:54
• Growing up on “dirtbag” hustles: 11:54–13:46
• Forging dad’s signature/last family photo: 20:31–25:58
• Cheating in school and state assessments: 26:02–28:34
• Hamburger University & McDowell’s nostalgia: 29:00–30:25
• Travel/airport food confessions: 30:46–34:51
• Personal comfort upgrades, homebody joys: 44:44–53:01
• Garbage Q&A (mail, pictures, travel hacks): 55:16–58:25
• The Honda Civic & Playboy Mansion story: 58:27–64:47
• Closing & comedic reflections: 65:08–67:45

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Summary & Tone

The tone is consistently loose, self-deprecating, and hilarious, bouncing from confessional childhood stories to “garbage” life hacks. Ryan Sickler, the hosts, and their shared background create a sense of warmth—celebrating the scrappy, hustling, always-scheming spirit of working-class kids making the most of every opportunity. Listeners are treated to both belly laughs and genuine moments of heart, all held together by relentless riffing and a mutual joy in all things “trash.”

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In short:
If you’ve ever called in a fake hair to score free pizza, or if the high point of your day is a cold cheesesteak on a cross-country flight, or even if you've had your life’s journey defined by a beat-up Civic and a chance encounter with the world’s weirdest neighbor—this is your episode.

Don't miss:

• The legendary pizza scam sequence [09:01–11:54]
• The last family photo story [20:31–25:58]
• The Playboy Mansion Civic caper [58:27–64:47]

Closing words:
“That’s where it all started. And that’s what got us here.” – Ryan Sickler [65:26]

Transcript

[Stage Foley]

Hang on there, Kippy. Before we get the show started, I want to talk to Atlanta and Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. The boys are coming for the AYG live show as a part of that back on the block tour. So round up the squad, grab some dickies, and come out and hang.

[Kevin Clancy]

Yeah, it's a great way to introduce people to the show. It's stand up. Plus, we play AYG with the crowd. You know it. You've seen it. Grab your tickets, rugarbage.com, we'll see you there. Love you. Yeah.

[Stage Foley]

Welcome to another exciting edition of Are you Garbage?

[Ryan Sickler]

The show where you find if your.

[Stage Foley]

Favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash. Now, here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H. Foley. Hey, everybody out there. And welcome back to everybody's favorite podcast. This is are you garbage?

[Kevin Clancy]

Oh, yeah.

[Stage Foley]

It's that little show. We sit down with your favorite comedians and we find that at the group to be classy. Yeah, but they're just a big old piece of trash.

[Kevin Clancy]

Trash, trash, trash.

[Stage Foley]

I'm your host, Stage Foley, coming at you on a beautiful day. We're out back here at Toady's in a new edition. Unfortunately, she just failed her car coast guard test.

[Kevin Clancy]

Okay.

[Stage Foley]

So she's gonna be on dry land for a little while.

[Kevin Clancy]

I didn't even know she was going out for.

[Stage Foley]

She was trying. She wanted to do a swimmer. She saw the Guardian the other night. She wanted to get involved. She likes that Aztec Kutcher. I don't know what to tell you. Okay, Mike Co is coming out here from right next to me. He is the CEO of RU Garbage. He's an international businessman, and he's my best pal in the whole wide world, and I love him. Give it up for kj, Kevin, James Ryan.

[Kevin Clancy]

Luke got this. What's up? Everybody shout out to you. As always, please make sure you rate view subscribe on itunes. Full video available on YouTube. Full video available over there on Spotify. And the boys are climbing a goddamn charts over there. Just the middle part of the charts, not the top middle part. And then obviously, the greatest website of all time, www.patreon.com re garbage. You go over there to get all that bonus content, gang.

[Stage Foley]

Yes, sir. And gang, we couldn't be more excited to have our incredibly, and I mean incredibly special guest back with us again today. He's a fixture. He's a staple over here. He's on the Mount Rushmore of Ru Garbage. You know him, you love him. He's got not one, but two amazing podcasts. The honeydew on the way back. And he's got a new special out on his YouTube page right now. Live and alive on YouTube. Give it up for Mr. Ryan Sickler, everybody.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Look yourself in. Thank you, guys. It's an honor to be back on.

[Stage Foley]

A 36 hour junket. He flies in New York, knocks out some pods. He's back to la.

[Ryan Sickler]

La.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Single dad, Budget, bro.

[Ryan Sickler]

I'm not here to around you probably.

[Kevin Clancy]

Staying out at the airport.

[Guest or Additional Host]

I'm at the airport, so I can leave tonight. I'm on a flight tonight.

[Stage Foley]

Do you order at the Grove and say I'll be right back? And you come back and the omelet's ready to go. This guy's Hollywood.

[Guest or Additional Host]

I haven't been to the Grove in years.

[Stage Foley]

I have no idea where it is.

[Guest or Additional Host]

You don't? It's really nice, actually.

[Kevin Clancy]

You should try it sometimes.

[Stage Foley]

The TWA Hotel. Look at you.

[Ryan Sickler]

TWA Hotel. Look, I. I get first dibs on.

[Stage Foley]

The lost and found over there.

[Ryan Sickler]

Well, you know what they told me? This. This is the kind of trash I hate.

[Kevin Clancy]

I just did. I hated it.

[Stage Foley]

I love it.

[Kevin Clancy]

You hated it.

[Ryan Sickler]

I. I can understand why you would. But I enjoyed it because that's.

[Kevin Clancy]

I was kindly. You're an asshole. But let me tell you not.

[Ryan Sickler]

Did you go see the. So I worked out when I was there.

[Kevin Clancy]

You trying to embarrass me? No.

[Ryan Sickler]

I'm going to show you a video.

[Stage Foley]

What do you. You throw Samsonites? Throwing baggage.

[Ryan Sickler]

That's their part of all this health thing. After, go watch my special live force.

[Stage Foley]

Congratulations.

[Ryan Sickler]

They almost killed me. It's been getting back into health and. And more than anything, I want to tell anybody out there struggling more than drugs, more than anything. Physical therapy. PT has helped me immensely.

[Stage Foley]

That's right. Okay.

[Ryan Sickler]

Anytime I'm in pain these days, I can go work out. I work at the. The guy I work out with, his name's Aaron. He's a doctor. And this dude knows what he's fucking.

[Stage Foley]

Doctor, Doctor, Yes.

[Ryan Sickler]

And I'll be like, hey, this is what's happening today. He'll be like, all right. And the exercises we do. I'm down to a level two pain when we're done. Nothing.

[Stage Foley]

Stretching it out, moving it.

[Ryan Sickler]

I'm walking now. Cardio was the thing I could never get to because I was always in pain after 30 minutes. But.

[Stage Foley]

But me too.

[Ryan Sickler]

So last night I was like, well, let me go down to this gym and look at this gym. And it is the nicest.

[Kevin Clancy]

Really.

[Ryan Sickler]

It's nicer than any gym. I've ever belonged to.

[Kevin Clancy]

It's insane.

[Ryan Sickler]

It's insane. Really?

[Guest or Additional Host]

I'm gonna show you a video.

[Ryan Sickler]

It's ridiculous.

[Kevin Clancy]

Okay?

[Ryan Sickler]

It is massive. It's bigger than this second Mike.

[Kevin Clancy]

It is.

[Guest or Additional Host]

I mean, I don't know why you.

[Stage Foley]

Gotta take shots at us.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Not just this room. This is a large area. That's why I'm saying this is a big spaceship.

[Kevin Clancy]

We're in an airplane hangar.

[Guest or Additional Host]

And it's enough. It fills it all up.

[Ryan Sickler]

Veep, did you go up to the pool?

[Kevin Clancy]

I didn't. I go.

[Stage Foley]

There's a pool at the airport.

[Ryan Sickler]

It's an infinity pool that's heated. Like, hot tub water. And it overlooks the airport. You can watch planes land and just take a dip. It's a phenomenal.

[Stage Foley]

That's jet fuel you're smelling.

[Guest or Additional Host]

There's a bar over there and everything.

[Stage Foley]

Really? That's pretty sick. I didn't know there was a bar.

[Guest or Additional Host]

This saw 10% was like, I hate it.

[Kevin Clancy]

I would. I wouldn't even say 10%.

[Guest or Additional Host]

That's like going to McDonald's and being like.

[Ryan Sickler]

Had a. A wrap.

[Stage Foley]

Their chicken wrap stinks.

[Kevin Clancy]

I got into a beef with the guy at the. At the food counter.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Yeah.

[Kevin Clancy]

Cuz I don't know if. Did you go over that? They're all different.

[Ryan Sickler]

Yes.

[Kevin Clancy]

Little stalls. And I like, grabbed a water from the. I didn't know they were all different. I grabbed the water from the one and was looking over at like the gummy bears at another. And he's like, hey, where are you going? I'm like, I'm looking at what you got here. He's like, you got to pay for that. I'm like, I will. I was.

[Ryan Sickler]

I'm not done shop.

[Kevin Clancy]

I'm not done shopping yet. He's like, these are all different stores. I'm like, it's the same counter.

[Stage Foley]

Do you have this at a large? I got snowed in there one night. Beautiful night.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Did you go to the pool?

[Stage Foley]

No. It was in the middle of December.

[Ryan Sickler]

It's a hot pool.

[Stage Foley]

That's. No way that's open at night in December.

[Ryan Sickler]

Trash. Then the hot tub in the winter.

[Kevin Clancy]

I don't know. You're calling it a hot pool. Doesn't sound classy.

[Ryan Sickler]

It's hot. I mean, I say that because a war.

[Kevin Clancy]

Like, it's not a heated pool. It's a hot pool.

[Guest or Additional Host]

It's more than heated.

[Kevin Clancy]

Yeah.

[Stage Foley]

Did you go swimming?

[Ryan Sickler]

No. Today?

[Stage Foley]

I didn't bring my jean shorts.

[Guest or Additional Host]

I got my jorts with me, bro.

[Ryan Sickler]

You think I'm not going with the Jams. My mom homemade jam she made.

[Stage Foley]

You swam in basketball.

[Ryan Sickler]

Did you have jams growing up? I got a little younger than me. No, no, no, no.

[Stage Foley]

I'm 49. Jams were huge. Life is a beach hat were huge. Remember them?

[Ryan Sickler]

Yeah, of course. Mackenzie, come on.

[Stage Foley]

What do you mean? He's a superintendent of our.

[Ryan Sickler]

My mom went to Joanne Fabrics, and basically we got jams at home.

[Stage Foley]

That's so funny you said that.

[Ryan Sickler]

We made them. She made.

[Stage Foley]

We made them in home EC class in seventh or eighth grade. We all had to make jams.

[Kevin Clancy]

Sounds like a sweatshop.

[Stage Foley]

Mine. So my legs came out of the pockets. It was embarrassing. I was not good at textiles. Is that what that's called?

[Guest or Additional Host]

Yes.

[Stage Foley]

Yeah, I was.

[Ryan Sickler]

Wait, so you got snowed in?

[Stage Foley]

You were snowed in there at the TWA Hotel? It was right around the pandemic. It was real quiet. Snow was falling down outside. Got a great night's sleep. I got up, dude, I was. There's a door. Like, we were. We were flying out of that terminal. There's a door at the bottom of that hotel. You're right in tsa.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Yep.

[Stage Foley]

Walking in a cockpit.

[Kevin Clancy]

I. I know, but that was another thing. They let you out of, like, Terminal 5. I had to get to Terminal 1, so I had to, like, get on.

[Ryan Sickler]

The shuttle, fly jet Blue.

[Kevin Clancy]

I didn't fly jet Blue.

[Stage Foley]

Yeah, well, stop flying Ugandan air.

[Kevin Clancy]

I'm a Delta.

[Ryan Sickler]

I'm flying out American. And they said it's a 20 minute walk to get to the tram and then over to the thing. That's all. But see, I. I like it. A little nostalgic for me because my father was an airline guy. My dad worked at. What's Ronald Reagan now? National Airport. He did a little stint.

[Stage Foley]

Reagan Dulles used to be Dulles, or.

[Ryan Sickler]

No, wait, no, it was National. Air Dulles is a little farther out in Virginia, There was National Airport, which is now Ronald Reagan, they call it. And then DWI is Baltimore, Wash. Is.

[Kevin Clancy]

It still Ronald Reagan?

[Ryan Sickler]

Yeah, still. It was national when he worked there, though, in the 80s.

[Stage Foley]

They took it from.

[Ryan Sickler]

They gave it to Ronnie.

[Kevin Clancy]

I thought they took it, took the wall.

[Ryan Sickler]

Reagan and he was National Airlines is what we worked for or he worked for.

[Kevin Clancy]

What he do?

[Ryan Sickler]

He was a crew chief. Ran all the. Out there. And then they got bought out by Pan Am. So I still have my dad's old school Pan Am work shirt, jacket, and I wore it a lot on my first late night appearance, I wore his shirt just. My dad died when I was 16, so I wore it like, hey, we. We're doing it.

[Kevin Clancy]

He's there with you.

[Ryan Sickler]

And then immediately, because the industry is stupid, they're like, oh, he's a blue collar guy. I'm like, it's just a shirt.

[Kevin Clancy]

Just a shirt. Well, I am. I mean, yeah, you're not. You're not an orthodontist. I worked a goddamn ups. I could be.

[Stage Foley]

Damn, your teeth are up.

[Kevin Clancy]

I love. He's like, they try to label me. They try to label me a blue collar guy. What the else are they gonna do?

[Guest or Additional Host]

I guess I meant blue collar comedy tour. Southern redneck.

[Kevin Clancy]

I got you.

[Stage Foley]

I have. I have.

[Kevin Clancy]

Isaac, I didn't know you were doing so hot. Such high brow. What you. Dimitri Martin.

[Stage Foley]

I have. My dad's.

[Kevin Clancy]

Goddamn sickler cerebral now.

[Guest or Additional Host]

You guys know that.

[Stage Foley]

I shifted.

[Kevin Clancy]

I'm like, didn't we. We spent 45 minutes talking about dominoes last time you were here.

[Stage Foley]

Nathan Fielder over here.

[Kevin Clancy]

Like, did I miss the boat? The.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Is that what we talked about?

[Ryan Sickler]

The pizza hacks, how you tell them there's hair in it and they'll bring it out?

[Kevin Clancy]

Is that what you do?

[Ryan Sickler]

We didn't. Did we talk about this? No, this is one. I just told Stavi, too.

[Stage Foley]

This is paid for a pizza, 1986.

[Guest or Additional Host]

You can only do this once if you.

[Ryan Sickler]

Unless you move, okay? Once to an address and once to each place. In the 80s, at least Domino's was known. I don't know if they still are for fantastic customer service.

[Kevin Clancy]

Yeah, they still are.

[Ryan Sickler]

Okay. They were known for that.

[Stage Foley]

I might push back on that, but go ahead.

[Ryan Sickler]

Back then, they would do it, you know? Like, they all do a pizza deal, whether it was three for 15 or buy two, get one free, whatever.

[Stage Foley]

555.

[Ryan Sickler]

And one night, we actually had hair on a pizza. So we called and they were like, we're so fucking sorry. We're gonna bring new pizza out, right? We told them the other two are good. Just the one has hair on. Well, they brought out what we paid for. So they brought out three pizzas.

[Kevin Clancy]

These pizzas, dirt bag lottery.

[Ryan Sickler]

Look like they could go in a commercial. Okay? They gave us magnets. Aw. You know what I'm saying?

[Kevin Clancy]

Make it right.

[Ryan Sickler]

And we're like. So then we call Papa John's one night. Like, got hair on this pizza. We got the two for one. They're like, we'll send somebody out. Boom. Two pizzas.

[Kevin Clancy]

Oh, shit.

[Ryan Sickler]

Oh, shit. So we keep doing it. I mean, we also moved a ton, so we're doing it. I'm now at this point, I'm homeless. I'm living with my grandmom's sister, my Aunt Marguerite. I'm working at UPS. Shout out to UPS, Ballmer Hub, Primary 1 Joe Avenue. I'm just basically sleeping on her couch. I'm working ups. And I'm also going to school full time, going to Towson and ups. I'm. I'm there for about four hours a night to sleep. And a weekend comes and she's going out with my Uncle Ed to do something and she's like, I'm going to buy you guys pizzas. I'm going to get you four of them. I go, just buy two, I'll get us the four.

[Guest or Additional Host]

And she's like, what are you talking about?

[Ryan Sickler]

I said, just trust me on this, Aunt Marguerite. I'm going to call, tell them there's hair on one, they're going to send two more out. She's like, they're not going to do that. I like, they're going to do that.

[Stage Foley]

Where are your scissors?

[Ryan Sickler]

P.S. have you ever done that here? Have you ever called? She's like, no.

[Kevin Clancy]

I got a few questions I got to ask you, Marguerite.

[Ryan Sickler]

I gotta scan, I gotta screen you.

[Kevin Clancy]

I don't. I don't wanna end up in. When he shows up.

[Stage Foley]

He lives a normal life, blending into his community. But people had no idea.

[Guest or Additional Host]

So we get the twofer. Call back right away.

[Ryan Sickler]

We got hair all over this pizza.

[Kevin Clancy]

It's all over.

[Ryan Sickler]

We're so sorry, sir.

[Stage Foley]

It's not even delivered yet.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Two more come out. My Aunt Marguerite can't get over it. She's like, that is ridiculous. So one and done though. It's a one and done.

[Stage Foley]

Got sicklers all over the country pulling.

[Ryan Sickler]

This all the time. All the time. We get excited to move. I'm like, guess what we're getting for.

[Guest or Additional Host]

The next two weeks?

[Ryan Sickler]

Free pizza.

[Kevin Clancy]

And everybody hitting everybody up. Where would you say your allegiance lied? Growing up, chain pizza wise, were you a domino? Obviously. Wherever you could get the deal. What did you prefer?

[Ryan Sickler]

I'll tell you, it wasn't a chain back then. We had a local spot called American Pizza. And again, Dad's dead, my mom left our family before that. So from 16 on, I have a twin brother, fraternal twin, he's 16, obviously, and my younger brother time is 13. So the three of us are just living by ourselves in this house.

[Stage Foley]

That's a lot of pizza.

[Ryan Sickler]

And we would order American Pizza every day to the point where they would.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Be like, okay, Kevin, we'll see you.

[Ryan Sickler]

In about 15 yes. It's wet. They know your voice. They give you the address, like, all right, Ryan, we'll see you in ten.

[Stage Foley]

I love that.

[Ryan Sickler]

Oh, my God. So we went there. If there was a chain. Papa John's didn't exist in the 80s. At least where we were wasn't around. But we had. And Domino's got to be newer. That's when they had the Noid.

[Kevin Clancy]

Remember the pizza?

[Ryan Sickler]

Of course.

[Kevin Clancy]

Shout out to the Noid.

[Ryan Sickler]

But Pizza Hut was the spot. And that was back then. The sit down. We're going out.

[Kevin Clancy]

As an event.

[Ryan Sickler]

Yes.

[Kevin Clancy]

A family dining.

[Ryan Sickler]

And if you got a 3.0 or higher on your report card, you were considered honor roll and you got a free personal pan.

[Kevin Clancy]

Yeah.

[Ryan Sickler]

So if you did good on your report card, a big night out was Pizza Hut. And you park in the parking lot, you go sit down, and someone comes over and takes your order. Now you walk up to a fucking window and you pick it up.

[Stage Foley]

So you went around to all the nerds in your high school, beat them up, took their report card.

[Ryan Sickler]

I know your boy was smart.

[Kevin Clancy]

Yeah.

[Ryan Sickler]

Word. 3.0.

[Kevin Clancy]

I was not showing off.

[Ryan Sickler]

I was it.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Listen, hold on here. The stats, though.

[Ryan Sickler]

3.

[Stage Foley]

1.

[Ryan Sickler]

You get, I'm in all the honor classes. I'm in all the gifted and talented classes, but math is my week.

[Stage Foley]

Did I know all your weakness?

[Ryan Sickler]

Math is my D plus C minus. And I make sure I get a C in math every year because I know I'm getting an A in gym.

[Kevin Clancy]

A even. Yeah.

[Ryan Sickler]

My A cancels out that C and I'm being the rest of everything. And that's a 3.0, brother who brags.

[Stage Foley]

About an A in gym.

[Guest or Additional Host]

I love it. A lot of people didn't get it. You had to dress everybody.

[Kevin Clancy]

You're short.

[Guest or Additional Host]

I had my. That's right, bro. I had my uniform every day. I was prepared. I was not that A up.

[Ryan Sickler]

Yeah.

[Stage Foley]

I imagine you took kickball way too seriously. You're throwing curveballs.

[Guest or Additional Host]

That was the best. You want to be on your team?

[Ryan Sickler]

I'm.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Listen, you want to cheat on me and Jim, and I'm getting you in math.

[Ryan Sickler]

You know what I'm saying? I'm like, slide that little test to the side.

[Stage Foley]

What's 6 times 8?

[Ryan Sickler]

48.

[Stage Foley]

Is that right?

[Kevin Clancy]

Yeah. Well, you look at. You had to. You have to look at a guy.

[Ryan Sickler]

Very good at basic math. I'm very good at the. You know. Also had a problem for a while where I. I got a little. What do you call it when you get, you know, ocd I started counting by threes. I would just run my thumb on the remote. You do that. I just. I would sort of like run my thumb on the road. Go 3, 6, 9, 12, 15. I can count by threes like a. Huh? Twos ain't.

[Kevin Clancy]

That's. Dude, that's you there. Quicker.

[Guest or Additional Host]

All right, I'm gonna get you there.

[Kevin Clancy]

I'll get you there twice. I mean, dude, what a dirt bag thing.

[Guest or Additional Host]

I've never.

[Kevin Clancy]

I've heard a lot of dirt bag flexes. I've never heard someone go, I can count by threes. Like a something of a. I'll put you. I'll take your lights out. Counting by threes, three times nine.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Number that's 27.

[Stage Foley]

Three times nine.

[Kevin Clancy]

Yeah, it is, bro.

[Stage Foley]

What's pie?

[Kevin Clancy]

What you eat for breakfast.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Three pie, lunch and dinner. That's 3.14. I believe. These are basic.

[Stage Foley]

Plus it's got a hair in it once you start.

[Guest or Additional Host]

I'm getting two pies, bro. That's 6.28.

[Kevin Clancy]

Two for 6.28. Repeat up until every address you get. You repeat that.

[Stage Foley]

I can see you at the Pizza Hut. Wait, yeah, you see that A in gym, huh?

[Guest or Additional Host]

See this right here, girl? Also a 3.0.

[Ryan Sickler]

Got you, cuz again, my dad's dead at 16, so I'm on my own insurance policy and it's. That's crazy expensive for a 16 year old.

[Kevin Clancy]

Wait, you had to get insurance?

[Ryan Sickler]

You're sell a drive.

[Kevin Clancy]

Oh, car insurance. I didn't meant health insurance. Got. I was like, how do you even.

[Ryan Sickler]

I don't even know if we had that.

[Guest or Additional Host]

I don't even think we had that.

[Kevin Clancy]

Not a. You get a doctor, go to brokers.

[Guest or Additional Host]

I get my physical for the school sports once a year and that's.

[Ryan Sickler]

I'm never seeing the doctor after that, but we had.

[Kevin Clancy]

You're something else.

[Ryan Sickler]

Health insurance or a car insurance. And if you got a 3.0.

[Kevin Clancy]

Yeah.

[Ryan Sickler]

Good grade also helped you. So I made sure that's smart. I cheated off the right people.

[Guest or Additional Host]

And I got Bs and an A.

[Ryan Sickler]

In gym because once they put letters X's and A's and B's. That's when I was out. My daughter's in that already in fifth grade. I told her, you got to ask your mom. I'm gonna fuck your shit up.

[Stage Foley]

Algebra. I was. I was about out.

[Ryan Sickler]

Done.

[Kevin Clancy]

I'll get you counting by threes.

[Guest or Additional Host]

I got you counting by threes, girl. You'll see. 6, 9, 12, 15, 18, 21, 24, 27, 30 and then it just goes from there, you know, Just keep repeating your threes.

[Ryan Sickler]

I want you to hit that multiple 10, but you get it.

[Stage Foley]

What did it go went? Algebra, right? Geometry, biology. What was this?

[Ryan Sickler]

Biology.

[Stage Foley]

What's the one?

[Ryan Sickler]

It went for us. I think it was algebra, calculus, geometry. It was trigonometry. We had an intro to Calcul calculus and then a Calculus.

[Stage Foley]

What's that?

[Ryan Sickler]

And my argument was like, look, just because I'm in these gifted and talented classes and I do well in all the other ones, can you just put me in the remedial math? Like, do I gotta go all these or none? And it was like, all or none. I'm the guy bringing the curve down. In your math class.

[Stage Foley]

Sure.

[Ryan Sickler]

It's the shitty part.

[Kevin Clancy]

I. I got put in. I got put in, like, hurt you?

[Guest or Additional Host]

Yes.

[Kevin Clancy]

The really slow math class one year. And I noticed. And I was like, I'm just keeping my fucking mouse. This is easy A, dude.

[Ryan Sickler]

That's what I'm saying.

[Kevin Clancy]

I'm like, I'm just gonna fucking ride this out.

[Ryan Sickler]

I'm hurting myself so.

[Kevin Clancy]

Well, I have two teachers. You know what I mean? It don't matter. I'm fucking chilling. Let me get this a. Get my mom off my back. We had started, like, bumping heads and fucking. This bitch goes back to school night and came home and was like, it's you and all mentally challenged people in the math class.

[Ryan Sickler]

And I'm crushing.

[Kevin Clancy]

I'll fucking. I'm helping a teacher. I'm up there doing the work.

[Guest or Additional Host]

I'm leading by example, for Christ.

[Kevin Clancy]

It lasted for like two months.

[Ryan Sickler]

I don't want to record.

[Stage Foley]

I won seven up, three days in a row. I didn't know where the hell I was. I'm cheating Kevin's. Talk about Uncommon goods, baby.

[Kevin Clancy]

I ain't talking about common goods. I'm talking about Uncommon Goods.

[Ryan Sickler]

Let's go.

[Stage Foley]

You know what's coming up. You know what's creeping on us? The holidays.

[Kevin Clancy]

It's the holiday season, gang.

[Stage Foley]

It's not too early to start your holiday shop. It's to do yourself a favor. Get over there in Uncommon Goods. Make the holiday shopping stress free. Make it joyful, make it it easy. Thousands of one of a kind gifts you cannot find anywhere else. You cannot find anywhere else. I'll say it again. Get over to Uncommon Goods.

[Kevin Clancy]

Yeah. Uncommon Goods has something for everyone. From moms and dads to kiddos and teens, from books from book lovers to history buffs and Die Hard football fans to foodies, mixologists, avid gardeners. You'll find thousands of new gift ideas that you won't find anywhere else. Listen. The good folks at Uncommon Goods listen well. Let's pull back the fourth wall. They sent the boys a little promo code. We were able to use it.

[Ryan Sickler]

Right.

[Kevin Clancy]

It's coming up. It was a baby's first birthday. I didn't know what to get. I'm not the best gift giver. I go around Uncommon Goods. Bada bing, bada boom on a homepage.

[Stage Foley]

Hero to family.

[Kevin Clancy]

First thing I saw. Boom. Got it, sent it over. Oh my God. We were looking at this. Where did you get this? I don't know. I spent years looking and doing research. No, I didn't. Uncommon Goods. So shop early, have fun and cross some names off your list this season. Today you can get 15% off your next gift. Go to uncommongoods.com AYG that's uncommongoods.com Ayg for 15% off. Don't miss out on this limited time offer. Uncommon Goods. We're all out of ordinary.

[Ryan Sickler]

Do it, Kim.

[Stage Foley]

Let's talk about Chime.

[Kevin Clancy]

Shout out to Chime. Chime.

[Stage Foley]

Chime understands that every dollar counts. That's why when you set up direct deposit through Chime, you get access to fee free features like free overdraft coverage, getting paid up to two days early with direct deposit and more.

[Kevin Clancy]

Chime is ban banking done right. Open a checking account with no monthly fees, no maintenance fees. Get paid up to two days early. Like the big man said, when you set up direct deposit with qualifying direct deposits, you're eligible for free overdraft up to $200 on debit card purchases and cash withdrawals. And let me be honest. I've been jammed up once or twice in my life. That helps you big time. My younger self would have benefited a lot from Chime. I wish Chime was banging back when I needed it. You open a checking account with no monthly fees, no maintenance fees, not to mention access to over 47,000 free fee free ATMs, more than the top three national banks combined. Work on your financial goals through Chime today. Open an account in two minutes at chime.comgarbage that's chime.comgarbage Chime feels like progress. One more time. Open an account two minutes. Chime.comgarbage do it.

[Guest or Additional Host]

I don't know if I ever told.

[Ryan Sickler]

You this story, but this is. This is a math story. This is actually a fucking very interesting, wild, deep story that gets stupid. But I, as I said, sucked at Math.

[Kevin Clancy]

I sold a 3.

[Ryan Sickler]

Math was mine, huh? So we had this quiz, and it was on a, you know, whatever, Intro to Calculus. And I failed it. And the teacher said you had to go get it signed by your parents. So I forged it and I turn it in. Well, my brother and I, being twins, were intentionally separated from classes. We were. We never had a class together except for one in all our 12 years of school.

[Stage Foley]

Did your dad pass at this point?

[Ryan Sickler]

Yep.

[Stage Foley]

So who would have signed it?

[Ryan Sickler]

Well, you know what? He wasn't.

[Stage Foley]

Okay?

[Ryan Sickler]

He wasn't. It's. But this ties into it. At that day, he said, we need to get it signed. Well, he also didn't know my mom wasn't with our family either. We just needed to show a parent that we up and have them acknowledge I signed it and I didn't tell anybody. My mom wasn't there to tell. My dad's, you know, working. This guy's doing doubles. He's a single dad with three kids busting his ass. I'm not gonna tell him I failed this. This pop.

[Kevin Clancy]

Got enough problems. Got enough problems need me making.

[Ryan Sickler]

Right? And I don't need to make this worse. So my brother and I never communicated about the trouble we would cause because we shared a car.

[Kevin Clancy]

I think I know where this.

[Ryan Sickler]

And if he up, I'm telling because I get the car on his weekend. So now I get the car three weeks in a row. If I up, he's ratting me out. And then he gets it. So we're ruthless with this. So we come to class. This is a Friday. I'll never forget it. Mr. Mangold was his name. And he said, sickler brothers. This is the only class we ever take together.

[Guest or Additional Host]

He goes, you guys have two different dads.

[Kevin Clancy]

I know.

[Ryan Sickler]

And right away, I look at my brother, I'm like, you piece of. This is mine. This was mine to fail. You had all the other ones. This was mine. This was mine.

[Kevin Clancy]

You took your bags.

[Ryan Sickler]

This was mine. He was good at this. He dogged it. This was mine.

[Kevin Clancy]

Damn.

[Ryan Sickler]

And I just look at him, and right away the whole class is laughing. He was a very nerdy teacher. He wore the pocket protector, the tie, button down, yellow brown pants, you know.

[Kevin Clancy]

That look, short sleeves, the Dwight Schrute.

[Ryan Sickler]

Glasses, hair sure fingered over. And he goes. We're like, no. He's like, did you guys show this to your dad? I'm like, yeah, I showed mine to my dad. He goes, you showed yours, too? My brother's like, yeah. He holds it up in front of everybody. He's like, you got two different signatures here. And he Goes, you definitely told your dad. And I'm like, we're laughing too. Like, told our dad, man. He goes, all right, well, tonight, this is another pizza place we loved called Pat Pabs, a local one. It's Friday night. He says, this is vivid as it comes. He says, and he was right. It's two for one pepperoni pizza tonight. Pap's like, yep. He goes, I'm gonna take the family there in my van with the kids. We're gonna pick those pizzas up. We'll swing by your house.

[Kevin Clancy]

Oh.

[Ryan Sickler]

See if your dad really knows you guys signed his papers. And we're like. And we're all laughing like, you ain't coming.

[Guest or Additional Host]

You ain't coming. You ain't coming.

[Ryan Sickler]

He's like, I'm coming.

[Guest or Additional Host]

I'm bringing the family to your house.

[Ryan Sickler]

I'm gonna get your address at the office. We're coming.

[Guest or Additional Host]

So we'll give you our address. Here it is.

[Ryan Sickler]

You ain't coming. Get home. That night is my night with the car. That weekend, that Friday, Saturday, Sunday. So I go out immediately. I'm hoping all. I got the car, I'm out, sticking around. 16 years old. I don't even remember it. I forget all about it. When I come back home that night, my dad, my brother are there. My dad's like, Mr. Mangold came by.

[Guest or Additional Host]

I'm like, bull. I'd forgotten. And my brother's just sitting there with his head like.

[Ryan Sickler]

I go, nah.

[Guest or Additional Host]

He goes, he did.

[Ryan Sickler]

And he knew you wouldn't believe it. So we took a photo. Now, back then, we gotta wait a.

[Stage Foley]

While for that photo.

[Guest or Additional Host]

I mean, we got 10 more on the roll.

[Ryan Sickler]

You know what I'm saying?

[Guest or Additional Host]

That might be two years before we burned out.

[Ryan Sickler]

We're not gonna go in and just get rid of.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Why are we wasting 10 shots talking.

[Stage Foley]

About the long game?

[Guest or Additional Host]

You see what I'm saying?

[Ryan Sickler]

So they take a photo, and then my dad dies, like, within days. Within days. And we. It's a big deal. At our school, we were very popular. Like, we played all the sports. There's two of us. So it was an excused absence. Anyone could come. It was very nice. It was very nice. And then when we go back to school and it's, you know, we took a. I don't know, a week or two off or something. We go back to school. I go to class, and Mr. Mangold pulls me aside. He's like, I gotta ask you, is that one of the last photos ever taken of your father? And I said, oh, my God, it's the Last photo ever taken of our dad. And I don't know what photo I would have had prior to that, but I still have that photo framed in my home of those two shaking fucking hands. And I. And I start thinking as a dad now, especially, like, if we're not twins, if. If we both don't fucking cheat, if we both don't forge. If we both don't shut all the way, we don't get that picture of our dad. Is that wild? That's wild. So to this day, I got my dad's picture framed. I cut Mr. Mangold out of one.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Of them, and I got him in the other one. I got him in the other one.

[Kevin Clancy]

That's great.

[Ryan Sickler]

In my home. That's awesome. It worked out pretty well for. I'm trying to unscrew a cap.

[Kevin Clancy]

Damn.

[Stage Foley]

That's fantastic.

[Ryan Sickler]

So sometimes it's all right to cheat kids. Sometimes it's ally.

[Guest or Additional Host]

You know what I'm saying?

[Ryan Sickler]

Sometimes it's all right to lie and cheat and tell your teachers.

[Kevin Clancy]

I remember we got called cheating in, like, chemistry in freshman year, College.

[Ryan Sickler]

What are you cheating? And how do you do in was.

[Kevin Clancy]

It was a lecture hall, like 500 kids. So I'm. I'm Ro. You know, 72, and we just have our books out and we're in college. Yeah.

[Stage Foley]

Took chemistry in college.

[Kevin Clancy]

You had to take like. Yeah. What are you, a doctor?

[Guest or Additional Host]

What?

[Ryan Sickler]

What?

[Guest or Additional Host]

A doctor?

[Stage Foley]

Nuh. Chemistry.

[Kevin Clancy]

You have to. You have to take, like, an Intro to science. It was like, intro. It was a chemistry 101 or whatever.

[Ryan Sickler]

What school?

[Kevin Clancy]

Temple University. Tu.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Yeah.

[Kevin Clancy]

Tu. Fight for the cherry and a white.

[Ryan Sickler]

Bill Cosby.

[Stage Foley]

Pudding Pops are delicious.

[Ryan Sickler]

Yeah.

[Kevin Clancy]

She goes, guys, I see you with your books out. Put them away in a couple of minutes. And everybody was like, in a minute. She was doing what she knew nobody would. Knew what the fuck was going on. She goes, put them away in a couple of minutes.

[Stage Foley]

Giving you half an hour.

[Kevin Clancy]

Dude. It's all. Everybody's just flipping pages.

[Ryan Sickler]

My. My good friend to this day is my oldest friend. We met before kindergarten. This dude's name is Matt Schilling. He is the smartest guy I know. He ended up going to Princeton, playing tight end for them, like. And he was like, my friend. And one of us a up. And then he goes back to teach at our school. And I'm like, you see any of the old teachers? He's like, yep. I go, what's it feel like? I go, hey, are any of them Ivy League graduates? He goes, nope. I go, what's it feel like to be a, like one of us as a fuck up and go back and then be more accredited.

[Kevin Clancy]

Yeah, yeah. Be the best one there people who.

[Ryan Sickler]

Ever taught us anything. He's like, it's pretty cool. So this dude's super smart, but also one of us.

[Kevin Clancy]

Sure.

[Ryan Sickler]

Around, you know, all of it. His Name's Matt Schilling.

[Kevin Clancy]

1, 2, 3.

[Ryan Sickler]

So I alphabetically am assigned often to sit. Sit right behind Matt Schilling. And this is my brother. And Matt Schilling would zip through those tests and Matt Schilling would do a little slide to the side. Ryan Sickler do a little lean. Ryan Sickler wasn't going to get a perfect. I was going to hit you about 82, 83. That's all I need. California Achievement Test.

[Kevin Clancy]

Did you guys have those Pennsylvania state assessments?

[Ryan Sickler]

Yeah, they made us take California Achievement Test in Maryland.

[Kevin Clancy]

I thought I was going to say, what the.

[Ryan Sickler]

Behind Scantron. And he would just. Would just slide it like this over here. And I would. To this day I call him. I'm like, thank you so much for those pizzas and that cheaper insurance, bro.

[Guest or Additional Host]

You have no idea.

[Stage Foley]

I took an intro to hamburgers in college, literally.

[Guest or Additional Host]

No, you didn't.

[Stage Foley]

Yeah, it was like, that's a class. It was because I. The local McDonald's, I had this. I had to transfer into, from English to hotel and restaurant manager because I was failing English and I wouldn't have been eligible for football the following year. So I had to change my major and all those classes got wiped away. And one of the classes was an intro to McDonald's about Ray Kroc.

[Ryan Sickler]

Oh, I see.

[Stage Foley]

Yeah. Okay. Now I think that might have been.

[Kevin Clancy]

My sign called a hamburger crash.

[Ryan Sickler]

I actually, at my community college, we had one for McDowell's.

[Guest or Additional Host]

No, you didn't.

[Ryan Sickler]

Yeah, the McDowell's. They got the Big Mac. We got the Big Mick.

[Guest or Additional Host]

They got the golden arches.

[Ryan Sickler]

They had the golden.

[Stage Foley]

I thought that was genius.

[Guest or Additional Host]

It was. I have a T shirt at home. It's McDowell's. It's the best. You know what? I'm really pissed off because I don't.

[Ryan Sickler]

Keep up with pop culture enough, but I know they do these pop up things. I've seen a Peach Pit. Yeah, they do what?

[Kevin Clancy]

They do Moe's.

[Ryan Sickler]

They did a McDowell's. They did a goddamn McDowell's in LA and I missed it. Where you could go in and get a Big Mick and all that.

[Guest or Additional Host]

God damn it.

[Ryan Sickler]

Oh, man.

[Stage Foley]

Damn it.

[Guest or Additional Host]

That's a good one.

[Stage Foley]

I love McDowell's.

[Ryan Sickler]

It was on Queens Boulevard, 8507 Queens Boulevard. That's the reason my friends and I all started saying seven like that. I got. My daughter says it like seven. Because he says 8507 Eric Queens Boulevard.

[Stage Foley]

Eric LaSalle was such a dick.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Yeah, he was great.

[Ryan Sickler]

Yeah, everyone's in that thing. Louie Anderson, Samuel Jackson's in there. Eddie doing his characters. Arsenio, Eric lasalle.

[Kevin Clancy]

I think about there.

[Ryan Sickler]

So many.

[Stage Foley]

All right, let's get into some Q.

[Ryan Sickler]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Stage Foley]

Some questions for Mr. Sickler. Not that we don't know.

[Kevin Clancy]

He's 100% well documented.

[Stage Foley]

Garbage with a hair on it.

[Kevin Clancy]

I got one for you. You're traveling. This is. This has been big in our world the past few weeks here. Do you eat at the airport? When you get to the airport, what's the standard?

[Guest or Additional Host]

I saw this clip. We have no idea what you're talking about. 100% mentally ill. What?

[Stage Foley]

Listen, you're staying at the airport.

[Ryan Sickler]

Yeah.

[Guest or Additional Host]

And you went to that restaurant over there, so.

[Ryan Sickler]

Yes, I do eat at the airport, but not like that. I. I time my. Like I'm gonna be there 30 minutes ahead of time.

[Kevin Clancy]

Gotcha.

[Ryan Sickler]

That's all I need. I got clear. I got TSA pre check.

[Kevin Clancy]

So you go ride 30 minutes before the flight.

[Ryan Sickler]

Before board, before boarding, not before the flight. Because that's about 30 minutes, boarding 25. So I get in, I get through security, I take my out. You know, I fly with weeds. I always give myself a little more time. Case I'm pulling jammed up, and then I take my piss, and then I go look for something to eat, but it's something.

[Kevin Clancy]

Is that like a bag of pistachio? Like, what are you doing?

[Ryan Sickler]

No, I'll go look for a sandwich or a wrap or. These days I'm just eating a lot of protein. So I will seriously buy a 15 sandwich and eat the turkey and cheese.

[Stage Foley]

And where are you eating that? Are you sitting down at the gate?

[Ryan Sickler]

If there's enough time. If there's like 20 minutes till boarding, I'll sit at the area. If there's space, if not, I go to the gate. Now, I got two things I do if I don't fly first class, and I only do that if it's responsible. But I. Since the back surgery, I just go up. And I don't lie. But what I say is I had back surgery. I don't say recently, I don't give a descriptor.

[Kevin Clancy]

And that you are a dirt bag. You're operating like you may have to testify in front of court like your Honor. I never say said when I factually.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Stated, everything's on camera these days, bro.

[Stage Foley]

I'm Ryan Sickler and I work for Pan American Airlines. I have my uniform right here.

[Kevin Clancy]

Three, six.

[Guest or Additional Host]

And he went under. That's when times got hard. When Pan Am went under, that's what times got hard in the sickler probably.

[Ryan Sickler]

But I go up and I just say, I'm super nice, always. Excuse me. I. I had back surgery and I'm traveling alone. And here's where I'm sitting today. Could I just get on with the pre board so I can just get my stuff up, respectable, out of everybody's way, and they say, yeah. And then I just go on. Because the other thing is all motherfuckers get on these days and take all the overhead bin space. And I'm not checking a bag. I don't check bags.

[Stage Foley]

I got weed in here.

[Ryan Sickler]

I haven't checked the bag in years. I checked one to go to Baltimore because I took camera equipment recently. I haven't checked the bag in years. I don't. I will sit on that. I'll have my daughter sit on it. And then we zip the. Out of that and then it's it.

[Stage Foley]

We check about five bags and we get in and we have a nice lunch.

[Ryan Sickler]

Do you travel with equipment?

[Kevin Clancy]

We travel with it. Yeah. We take like two. You know, there's six of us when we travel.

[Ryan Sickler]

Okay.

[Kevin Clancy]

He's got two big pelicans. Yeah, we're bad with money.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Where the are you eating at the airport?

[Stage Foley]

The Palm.

[Kevin Clancy]

The Palm. There's the Palm restaurant.

[Stage Foley]

Yeah.

[Kevin Clancy]

JFK is. If we're hitting that Palm. It's not even. It's not even debated. We know we're jfk.

[Guest or Additional Host]

What terminal?

[Kevin Clancy]

You see it? It's right there at the right.

[Stage Foley]

Ask for Andrea. I swear to God.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Give me the ayg discount. God damn it. No.

[Kevin Clancy]

Then if you're in laguardia.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Never gotten to an air airport to.

[Ryan Sickler]

Be like, yeah, I need to eat.

[Kevin Clancy]

We love that restaurant. We love it.

[Ryan Sickler]

Never.

[Kevin Clancy]

But the whole team knows we like an airport break.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Is it good, though?

[Kevin Clancy]

No, not really.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Just like the tradition.

[Kevin Clancy]

We just like, get in there, you hang it. It's not bad. Yeah, it's not for. It's. You get graded on a curve. But it's also like, you know, we're all. It's like we're all getting ready to go on the road for a week, whatever. So it's like the vibes are high. We all get there, whatever. Hey, I don't know. Make Fun of each other. Get away from our dumb wives or what?

[Ryan Sickler]

That's. I wondered if what you want to.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Get away from your home three hours. And then what happens when you're delayed? I'm delayed all the time.

[Kevin Clancy]

We've honestly never been. Get the out of here. Of all of our traveling. I think we got jammed. We just us. Yeah. Non stop once. We. We Delta Never. We've never been jammed up.

[Ryan Sickler]

I flew. Took me 24 hours to get to the Phoenix and back. One time I missed only weekend. Excuse me. I've ever missed in my career was that weekend too. And I couldn't. I was like, what are we doing? We're just stuck in Phoenix. Yeah.

[Kevin Clancy]

No, we. We've been very, very fortunate. But yeah. Okay.

[Ryan Sickler]

Can I tell you something else I'll do?

[Stage Foley]

Please.

[Ryan Sickler]

I'm not above it. I like a good cheese steak.

[Kevin Clancy]

Hey. From your mouth to God's ears.

[Ryan Sickler]

And I like. I do love warm food food. But I like a cold cheese stick. So do I. I love it. Purposely wrap it up in foil.

[Kevin Clancy]

Hits different.

[Ryan Sickler]

Put it in my fridge. Like harder to eat the next day.

[Stage Foley]

You put it in the fridge.

[Ryan Sickler]

Yeah. I love foil too. Not their white paper. Foil keeps it a little cooler.

[Stage Foley]

Yeah.

[Ryan Sickler]

And I will absolutely take that cheesesteak and throw that in my backpack somewhere over Kansas. I'm busting that out and eating.

[Kevin Clancy]

Huh? Yeah.

[Ryan Sickler]

You're allowed to bring food from home.

[Kevin Clancy]

It ain't a stadium.

[Guest or Additional Host]

That's your legal stadium. You know.

[Ryan Sickler]

I mean I got a clear bag with my sandwiches. Yeah. I'll bust out cheesesteak. You know how good that feels?

[Kevin Clancy]

See, I would be.

[Ryan Sickler]

That's comfortable.

[Stage Foley]

Got on the plane first. Cheesesteak.

[Guest or Additional Host]

That's the other thing. I just set all my up and I'm ready to roll you in here.

[Ryan Sickler]

No problem. I'll get out. I'm by my set.

[Stage Foley]

Salt and pepper shaker and ketchup on it.

[Ryan Sickler]

And if it ain't packed, maybe my backpack's up there.

[Kevin Clancy]

I got caught.

[Ryan Sickler]

This guy, the guy said s made me throw it under my feet.

[Guest or Additional Host]

But whatever.

[Kevin Clancy]

That's fine. I respect such a third back.

[Ryan Sickler]

I know you've never like taken a slice of pizza from home or put it in your backpack for the.

[Kevin Clancy]

I have a rule. I can't put food through the X ray machine. That's like.

[Guest or Additional Host]

What's your rule on that?

[Kevin Clancy]

It's just weird to me, dude.

[Stage Foley]

I'm fat. I can't do that.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Your clothes are going through the. You're putting on.

[Kevin Clancy]

I know, but it's Just such a fat guy thing to me as is to be like, oh, that.

[Ryan Sickler]

They see it. Yeah.

[Stage Foley]

I can't pull an.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Oh, I thought you were working. Worried about it. Putting cancer in the food.

[Kevin Clancy]

I might. The I'm getting at the Palms. Going through security.

[Stage Foley]

It's all a radio.

[Kevin Clancy]

They gotta. They gotta do everything.

[Stage Foley]

I can't pull an old slice of pizza out of my CPAP bag. Chicks on the plane.

[Ryan Sickler]

You don't have your CPAP travel?

[Stage Foley]

No. What, a little baby one?

[Ryan Sickler]

Yeah.

[Stage Foley]

You have the little tiny one? My aunt has it.

[Ryan Sickler]

I fuck.

[Kevin Clancy]

Your aunt's got a CPAP machine?

[Ryan Sickler]

Piece of insurance won't cover the travel.

[Guest or Additional Host]

You gotta pay out of pocket.

[Stage Foley]

Hates everybody.

[Ryan Sickler]

$1,100.

[Kevin Clancy]

I know. Everybody's out. That's a dirty. Everybody's out there. That's true.

[Guest or Additional Host]

They're not out to get you.

[Ryan Sickler]

They just got their fucking scams. My Blue Shield Silver Insurance, which I talk about. My new special. Go watch it. Streaming now on my YouTube live. And live is they will cover a CPAP machine. If you use it 70% of the time, then it's covered and you're hooked up. You know, it's just connected to a little app. But the travel one, you don't need it. They won't pay for it. Won't pay for it.

[Stage Foley]

You know, you could just use that as your regular one.

[Ryan Sickler]

Yeah, but then you have to. You don't have to take the travel one out and also got to go get distilled water if I want to put water in the fucking thing.

[Stage Foley]

So do you use the water every time?

[Ryan Sickler]

I do. My friend just stopped using it. We got. We're getting old, bro. We got competitions. I'll send them my 99s and 100 sleep scores.

[Stage Foley]

I stopped too. I kind of stopped.

[Ryan Sickler]

You did. It didn't fuck the machine up?

[Kevin Clancy]

No.

[Stage Foley]

Here. Here's the thing, though. I'm worried because the metal plate on the bottom still heats up.

[Ryan Sickler]

Yeah.

[Stage Foley]

So I think I'm breathing.

[Guest or Additional Host]

That's what I wondered, too. You should chat. GPT.

[Stage Foley]

I think I'm breathing hot metal.

[Guest or Additional Host]

How many humans have died just for that kind of shit?

[Ryan Sickler]

We're like, I had no idea. Just getting straight radium in my system.

[Kevin Clancy]

Huffing bore.

[Guest or Additional Host]

What?

[Ryan Sickler]

But the travel one doesn't need water. So why the. The big one? How does that. I don't know. That's what I'm saying. It seems like a scam.

[Guest or Additional Host]

So if I got.

[Ryan Sickler]

I got a bus, I need gas.

[Guest or Additional Host]

But I forget a Volkswagen Bug.

[Stage Foley]

No gas.

[Ryan Sickler]

Why? Why?

[Kevin Clancy]

You're asking the right questions, I'll give you that. I'm saying take this whole thing down.

[Stage Foley]

I wanted to ask you, just going back a little bit, did you ever have a rat tail?

[Ryan Sickler]

Oh, did I? Yeah, I had a rat tail. Mullets. I had a mullet galore too. They're online. I. We. My senior year, a bunch of us agreed to grow a mullet to see who could get the longest one. And like, halfway through, they all cut them. And I said, nah.

[Kevin Clancy]

Seeing us at the end, and it.

[Ryan Sickler]

Was this short up here, and, I mean, I could take my thumb back here and touch it just at my waist.

[Kevin Clancy]

Nice.

[Ryan Sickler]

And I would. I'm. I would take care of. Of it too. I would shower and I'd get out and I'd lay it all flat. I'd lay it on my back. I'd lay down and watch tv so it would get nice and flat. That was my flat iron. And I would take care of that thing. And then when we went to cut the mullet, I left a rat tail. You know, it's the stage. A little fun with it.

[Stage Foley]

You twist it. You'd braid it.

[Ryan Sickler]

I would let, like, girls braid it and stuff, but I know dudes were braiding.

[Kevin Clancy]

Tony, get over here.

[Ryan Sickler]

Nope.

[Guest or Additional Host]

I've never been hanging out a party where someone's like, sickler, let me braid your rat tail.

[Ryan Sickler]

The girls like, can I. Can I play with it? I'm like, yeah, you can play Nintendo.

[Guest or Additional Host]

French braid, girl.

[Kevin Clancy]

It's not back there, huh? Well, you. So we talked about the hotel and the pool. Will you swim at a pool? Like, if you're on the road and you're at, like a Marriott or it fucking days in, and they got the pool next to the lobby. Will you jump in there?

[Ryan Sickler]

Here's the thing.

[Kevin Clancy]

I love it.

[Ryan Sickler]

Yes. Yeah, I will do it. And I will also hot tub to an extent. I was a lifeguard, okay? I was a lifeguard. I got my certified. I was a certified lifeguard. I got my. Got my.

[Stage Foley]

I can't not think of you saying all these things to the person at the gate for some reason.

[Guest or Additional Host]

I was a lifeguard.

[Ryan Sickler]

This is what my daughter hears. I was a lifeguard, and I got my, you know, certification at the. Yeah. And then I went and got a job where I was just a lifeguard because I'm working Monday to Friday. Saturdays. I always work Saturday and Sunday. Is lifeguard at this place called the Forest Motel. It's in Baltimore off Route 40. And it was a vintage motel. They tried to, you know, make look hip and Chicago. And the pool was the shape of a tree. A pine tree, but not pointed cross.

[Stage Foley]

Sounds awesome.

[Ryan Sickler]

So this is my place, but at the time I'm there, it's 90. Whatever. One, two, three. It's not awesome. It's drugs. And it's just the maids are bringing their kids. I gotta lifeguard them at the pool. Like, it's.

[Guest or Additional Host]

So.

[Kevin Clancy]

That's rough.

[Ryan Sickler]

What I learned, though, you know they can't swim. They couldn't swim. What I learned is that I learned how to do PH and all that stuff. And then I started picking up a Buddy Shift when Bally's Total Fitness used to be called Holiday Spa, if y' all don't know. Cher. Cher was a spokesperson. Sup, Cher. And I was a lifeguard there. Now, when you have a gym and you have that many people using the hot tub, a lot of times you'll see foam on top. And then.

[Stage Foley]

Is that bad?

[Ryan Sickler]

When they. You become a lifeguard, they teach you what that is. And what that is is when hundreds, literally of people get in this hot tub, you know, a layer of just regular skin falls off. Well, that's what that is, collecting on top of the water. It's everyone's, you know, juice, whatever. Epidermis, flakes, psoriasis, whatever. The people.

[Kevin Clancy]

He don't kill that.

[Stage Foley]

I thought it was club soda.

[Ryan Sickler]

So they would give me a solution, and people would always say, there's a lot of bubbles. And you don't say anything. You just go over, you squirt this solution, and all it does is make it dissipate. Yeah, it ain't going any.

[Kevin Clancy]

No, it just pops the bubbles.

[Ryan Sickler]

So then they tell me, like, really, you should be draining that hot tub and scrubbing it clean quite often. And I was like, jim's don't. I don't know if I've ever seen my gym. So then I start going to hot tubs. And you'll see if you look in a hot tub, they'll be a green layer of what you think looks like algae. If I see that, you're out, we're not getting in at all, because that's all what that is. But I'm definitely swimming in.

[Kevin Clancy]

You're getting in a pool?

[Ryan Sickler]

Yeah, man, look. When we went to Disneyland one time, my buddy and I took our daughters, and we had a great time at Disneyland. We go back to the pool, and they're jumping across the beds and they're having the best time. And we looked at each other like, next time, let's just rent a Hotel room.

[Kevin Clancy]

Yeah.

[Ryan Sickler]

What are we doing? They don't give a fuck about, you know, the goddamn teacups. They're having the best time of their life and we're pushing them farther apart. And then our rule is once you.

[Guest or Additional Host]

All start crying, it's over and we know it's coming. We keep pushing them farther apart. And then one hits and they'll look at us with tears in their eyes because they don't want to cry.

[Ryan Sickler]

I was like, you keep going, keep going. So yeah, I'll definitely do that.

[Kevin Clancy]

Okay.

[Ryan Sickler]

I work out at the fitness rooms as well. I do that.

[Kevin Clancy]

You like an airport breakfast or a hotel breakfast or. No, you don't.

[Ryan Sickler]

I'm not a breakfast guy. Really? I never really. Yeah. Listen, if you're gonna go and make and sit there, then I'll get it. But as my day to day.

[Stage Foley]

Nah, no kidding.

[Ryan Sickler]

I usually eat sometime after noon.

[Stage Foley]

What about on the weekends? You and the. You and the kid, you make her as little scrambies or something?

[Ryan Sickler]

Some eggs she makes me. Now she's 11, she does, she makes killer eggs.

[Stage Foley]

Really?

[Ryan Sickler]

Yeah, she made me a crab. Crab, Canadian bacon. I gave her all these ingredients and she made me a whole fucking omelet that was killed. Tell her that's my Sundays. She makes it. You know what I mean? I'm not gonna let her down. Plus it's good, I don't have to lie. But now my Monday to Friday, I would say I get up, drop my daughter off at school, I go for like an hour walk and then it's podcast and everything else and I won't eat till after that.

[Stage Foley]

He's a worker, man.

[Ryan Sickler]

I working, I'm hungry. But, but also here's the other thing. When I wake up, I also eat late. Late, I shouldn't. So when I wake up, rarely, I bet you five times a year I wake up and I go, man, I'm hungry right now. Usually I'm not hungry.

[Stage Foley]

Gotcha.

[Ryan Sickler]

You know?

[Kevin Clancy]

All right.

[Ryan Sickler]

And then it hits me around 11, but I push through with a bunch of Diet Coke.

[Kevin Clancy]

Me too.

[Ryan Sickler]

That's it? Yeah, that's it.

[Kevin Clancy]

That's shout out to a dc.

[Stage Foley]

You are one of one, my friend. I'll tell you.

[Ryan Sickler]

It's my breakfast. This morning at 8:30 when we were.

[Kevin Clancy]

I was, I called him.

[Ryan Sickler]

I thought I'm texting Kevin Clancy, he's texting me. I'm getting all my times.

[Kevin Clancy]

I got you at 10:30. I said 30. I called him just because I was like jumping around, he go, wait, who am I Talking to right now.

[Stage Foley]

Shout out to kfc.

[Kevin Clancy]

I just woke up. Let me. Who am I talking.

[Guest or Additional Host]

I was out front of the TWA.

[Ryan Sickler]

Hotel, sitting on a bench in the sun, having a joint and a Diet Coke for breakfast, waiting on my Uber to go an hour and a half for 12 miles. It's illegal here, you know, I live up the rules. I'm outside the airport, and it's also.

[Kevin Clancy]

It says the property. This ain't federal law.

[Guest or Additional Host]

I wasn't a property off the property. What your law says. I look them all up. Your law says that recreational cannabis is.

[Ryan Sickler]

Legal to smoke anywhere. Tobacco is legal to smoke. And that was the smoking section, where they say smoking is allowed here.

[Guest or Additional Host]

So I went over to the smoker section.

[Ryan Sickler]

I'm just cooler than that.

[Stage Foley]

I'd hate to pull you over.

[Ryan Sickler]

They're dying.

[Guest or Additional Host]

You'll still see me over there in my 70s.

[Ryan Sickler]

That rest of that smoker section's thinned out by that. You know what I'm saying?

[Stage Foley]

You ever have a radio in the shower?

[Ryan Sickler]

Not in the shower, no. I've had a speaker, maybe on the counter so I could hear it in the shower, but these days, so, you know, I. You know, I tell my daughter, like, we're new money. You know, we're new at this. I got a couple of bucks, but I'm not rich by any means, but I really love football. And I've got the TV in the living room. I've got one in my bedroom. And I put one in the bathroom.

[Kevin Clancy]

No way.

[Ryan Sickler]

I put one.

[Kevin Clancy]

Where's it at? In the bathroom.

[Ryan Sickler]

So it's exactly where you could see it from taking a shit.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Or the shower.

[Ryan Sickler]

That's where it is. It's. If I'm, like, up in the corner, if I'm sitting on my toilet right here. My shower's right here in front of me. It's a glass shower. TVs right here above the sinks. It could also be pulled out and maneuvered.

[Kevin Clancy]

Got that. You got the elbow on it.

[Ryan Sickler]

Of course I got an elbow. I want to see it from all angles.

[Guest or Additional Host]

So these days, I don't need the radio anymore.

[Ryan Sickler]

I will watch you got the goddamn.

[Guest or Additional Host]

And I'm. I'm wiping the fog. And I'm like, that's a score.

[Ryan Sickler]

Is that three two or eight two.

[Stage Foley]

You know, I'm not good with the numbers.

[Ryan Sickler]

Holy.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Yeah, so no.

[Ryan Sickler]

Okay.

[Guest or Additional Host]

These days, bro, for sure.

[Ryan Sickler]

I've got the Sunday ticket on in the toilet or the MLB package.

[Stage Foley]

That Sunday ticket is worth every.

[Ryan Sickler]

That's all I need.

[Stage Foley]

Yeah, it's worth every.

[Ryan Sickler]

Well, I used to go to the sports bars. I used to go to them. Well, I'm California since the 90s, so I would go to. There was a place called Bob's Classy Lady. It was a strip club, but right next to it, touching it like he owned both of them was a sports bar. And back then they had the early stream and no one gave a. About the Ravens, you know what I mean? They're. They're two years old when I get here. And they would give us the size of that guest cam.

[Kevin Clancy]

Yeah.

[Ryan Sickler]

Up in that corner. And I would go sit there and I'd spend a hundred and some dollars happy if we won, $100,000,000 Bummed if we lost. And I was like, well, there's two weeks of 300 Sunday Ticket that. So now it's just a home experience.

[Stage Foley]

I was trying to think about this the other day and I didn't look it up, though. How quick did the Ravens hit when they. When they started?

[Ryan Sickler]

96. Came in 2000. Won the Super Bowl. Two.

[Stage Foley]

Yeah. Four years. Right. Who was the coach?

[Ryan Sickler]

The tall like Brian Billick won the first one. Trent Dill for quarterback. Right. But we.

[Stage Foley]

Ray Lewis was on that team.

[Ryan Sickler]

Yes, Ray Lewis. I mean that defense is the greatest defense in the history of football.

[Stage Foley]

Yeah, they kind of. They came in.

[Ryan Sickler]

They let up one touchdown in the entire playoffs once. 1. And it was a. It was the Titans. There was a touchdown. We were. No one's ever had a shutout in the super bowl, which blew me away. And we were right there and we let a kickoff return go. So it wasn't against the. It was against the special team. But we had legally.

[Kevin Clancy]

I know my rights.

[Guest or Additional Host]

I just want you to know. But I want to tell you this funny story.

[Ryan Sickler]

This is great because we had Tony Saragusa who shout out to the goose, rest in peace. All right.

[Kevin Clancy]

Everybody loved the gun.

[Ryan Sickler]

Last of his kind. You don't see much of these people anymore.

[Stage Foley]

And Sopranos too.

[Kevin Clancy]

What do you love twisted teas or something? Was he always drinking twisted teas?

[Ryan Sickler]

He drank something, yeah. He did home. He did man cave shows. He was fucking great. And he tells this funny story because that. That 30 for 30 came out about the 2000. 2000 Ravens defense. And we're in the AFC championship game, we're playing the Raiders, and he's accused of leaving his feet and driving all his weight on Rich Gannon. It hits his shoulder, shoulders up, he's out of the game. We end up beat. They scored three points and he. Rich Gannon goes on TV and is bitching about it, complaining that it was dirty or whatever. Tony Saragusa's wife says to Tony Saragusa, who. He later says this on the media. She goes, what is he complaining about? I take that weight twice a week.

[Kevin Clancy]

Shout out. The goose is loose.

[Guest or Additional Host]

So he said that on me. What are you complaining about? My wife takes that twice a week. And they were like, that's great, dude.

[Kevin Clancy]

Great. What a comeback.

[Guest or Additional Host]

That's what I'm saying. You don't hear guys like that anymore.

[Ryan Sickler]

The character's gone.

[Stage Foley]

I feel like.

[Kevin Clancy]

I mean, he was.

[Ryan Sickler]

Maybe they shut him up these days, too, but. But the character's gone.

[Stage Foley]

When you're in the bathroom and you're doing your business, do you leave the toilet paper on the roll or do you take it and hold it? Or are you.

[Ryan Sickler]

When I'm wiping.

[Stage Foley]

Yes.

[Ryan Sickler]

Or do I leave it on the counter regular early?

[Stage Foley]

You mean, do you leave it on the counter?

[Ryan Sickler]

Yeah, I got it on a roll.

[Stage Foley]

You got a roll?

[Ryan Sickler]

Yeah.

[Stage Foley]

So when you're. When you're doing your thing, do you take it off the roll and hold the roll?

[Ryan Sickler]

All right, here we go. I used to be paper. Toilet paper under. Because you can roll it easier, right? But now I'm. These days, I'm paper over. I don't know why I switched, but I just was like, let's.

[Kevin Clancy]

I go either way.

[Ryan Sickler]

I'm counting threes. Let's switch up our OCDs. You know what I'm saying?

[Stage Foley]

But you leave it on the roll. You don't take.

[Ryan Sickler]

Leave it on the roll. I go. And then. And then I take it off. What do you mean?

[Kevin Clancy]

No, he's saying, like, you know, a pulley system and a couple of mirrors.

[Stage Foley]

I was at Hamburger University.

[Guest or Additional Host]

What are you asking?

[Kevin Clancy]

No, he takes. So, like, his. I'm assuming, is on a hook where, like, it can. You can easily remove it.

[Ryan Sickler]

Oh, you're removing.

[Kevin Clancy]

So he removes the whole roll.

[Ryan Sickler]

No, no, no, no. I'm.

[Stage Foley]

Gentlemen, okay, I'm getting it.

[Guest or Additional Host]

But here's the other thing.

[Kevin Clancy]

New money.

[Stage Foley]

It's got a tv.

[Guest or Additional Host]

And here's the other thing.

[Ryan Sickler]

It's just a. It's just a. It's. It's not the old school little plastic piece that you had to push in. Yeah, that was rock solid. Solid.

[Kevin Clancy]

That's what I got. It's a lot of.

[Ryan Sickler]

We don't need to change. You get. I got this apartment. It got new. A dishwasher takes an hour and a half. I'm like, what the. It doesn't dry the dishes. Nothing wrong.

[Kevin Clancy]

Whirlpool kitchen ain't great company.

[Stage Foley]

So take that roller apart with the spring inside. I got. Putting a bomb together. I loved it.

[Ryan Sickler]

Oh, that's a good idea.

[Stage Foley]

Ours was broken.

[Kevin Clancy]

My whole. And we would do use. I remember the one time that spring went.

[Stage Foley]

You were.

[Guest or Additional Host]

He goes like, shoot the toilet.

[Kevin Clancy]

I was like.

[Guest or Additional Host]

I gotta reach in there and get that.

[Kevin Clancy]

My brother taped it with electrical tape, and he brought everybody in because I fix this. You know what I mean? Like, this is. It's done. And I mean, through college, through college, it stayed that way.

[Guest or Additional Host]

There are times you just couldn't get one.

[Kevin Clancy]

I feel.

[Ryan Sickler]

I get a little zesty and I. I rip it quick and it shoots off because it's just a. Just a little thing now. God damn it. And I gotta re. And then I gotta reel it in. But these days, also, I don't. I've. I've. I've taken my toilet to the next level.

[Kevin Clancy]

You went. So you got the smart guy. Oh.

[Ryan Sickler]

Got the full bidet, heated seat plugged in. All of it.

[Kevin Clancy]

Good for you.

[Ryan Sickler]

When there's two things I want to do when I go in my home.

[Kevin Clancy]

I feel like those are watching me.

[Ryan Sickler]

Anytime I eat, sleep, sleep comfortably, and do everything I need to do in that bathroom. Comfortably.

[Kevin Clancy]

Sure.

[Stage Foley]

Watching a whole football game.

[Ryan Sickler]

Listen, my daughter, I. I hate this reminder.

[Kevin Clancy]

But.

[Ryan Sickler]

But from the hospital, when they almost kill me. Watch my special lives, she made me keep the shower chair that I had to have when I first got out. I was like, I don't want to keep it. It's a reminder.

[Kevin Clancy]

I don't.

[Ryan Sickler]

Like, she's like, we're keeping it. So she keeps it in her shower. But every now and then I go get that.

[Kevin Clancy]

Yeah.

[Ryan Sickler]

And I sit it under my rain shower, and I just sit there and I just watch football.

[Stage Foley]

Oh, my God.

[Kevin Clancy]

Say it.

[Ryan Sickler]

I will. I'm a homebody, dude.

[Guest or Additional Host]

I don't want to be anywhere.

[Kevin Clancy]

I want to leave the bathroom if I. I don't.

[Ryan Sickler]

I don't hang out at the clubs unless I have a spot. I'm not at the clubs. I don't enjoy going to bars or any of that anymore. I feel like our lives.

[Kevin Clancy]

Yeah. We're out moving enough.

[Ryan Sickler]

We're out there among those people that I. You know. And yes, we're the center of attention that night. But I'm around the people drinking and smoking and laughing and have a good time. I don't feel like when I get home, I need to go do more of that. I really Enjoy.

[Stage Foley]

You want to sit in the shower.

[Ryan Sickler]

In the hospital podcast? I want to sit in a hot, hot shower in a hospital chair there.

[Guest or Additional Host]

If I smoke weed in there, I'd figure it out, but they haven't made that yet.

[Kevin Clancy]

Speaking of the van, I just heard.

[Guest or Additional Host]

You say I had my bathing suit on.

[Kevin Clancy]

Basketball shorts. If you're at a public restroom, you're at the urinal. Will you put your hand on the wall? Are you like that kind of guy?

[Guest or Additional Host]

It depends.

[Ryan Sickler]

I mean, I'm not above that for sure. I will absolutely do that if it's. It's depending on the place. Also, how long I gotta piss? If I'm pissing, I'm going. You know what I mean? I put my hand on the wall. Here's one, here's one for you. Saw this yesterday at the airport. Grown ass man with gray hair, pants all the way down to his knees.

[Kevin Clancy]

I just saw that on the way back from Boston.

[Ryan Sickler]

What are we doing?

[Kevin Clancy]

A Chinese guy ass out.

[Ryan Sickler]

And I'm crazy. What are you doing, dude? One time, my buddy, Eric Snyder. This is terrible and funny. We're at the Ravens game. We're, you know, he's paranoid. He's a big dude. He's. We're in that cattle call, just moving through the crowd. Oh, my God, oh my God. And he just looks at me and.

[Guest or Additional Host]

He goes, oh, my God, I'm standing on a child. And the crowd parts. And I look at him, he's like, come on. I said, get the up.

[Kevin Clancy]

I respect that.

[Guest or Additional Host]

I'm standing on a child, he said. And it parted.

[Ryan Sickler]

And then he proceeds to get shit faced. And we go to the bathroom and on purpose, he drops them to his ankles. His ankles. You know, it's six people deep behind.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Every one of those, they are laughing there.

[Kevin Clancy]

There's nothing funnier.

[Ryan Sickler]

And he's not even breaking. And I'm like this. But this real dude did it. You know what I mean?

[Guest or Additional Host]

He was doing it.

[Ryan Sickler]

I'm like, what? What are we doing, bro?

[Kevin Clancy]

There's a great line from Jackass. The guy pulls, drops. He's at a bar, he drops his pants to his ankles, looks at the guy next goes, can't get any chicks out here. It's like, I was like 11 when I saw the funniest thing I. Nothing's going to be funnier than that ever.

[Stage Foley]

You get somebody else's mail at your house, you throw it out. Do you agree, strongly agree, disagree or strongly disagree?

[Ryan Sickler]

This is a tough one for me because something happened to me. So 100%. I'm throwing your mail away. I mean, I'm not even returning you to sender. I'm not even telling the mailman if I know. I'm like, you don't live here anymore. It's just trash. Yeah, but something happened to me that should change my view. But it hasn't. But it should have. I used to live at this old apartment. I'm gonna say it was, like, three addresses prior when I get this phone call or, excuse me, an email, and it's a lady that says, I live in your old apartment. You were a quick Google search, Church. I've got a check here for you for $2,500 from an insurance company overpayment.

[Stage Foley]

Whoa.

[Ryan Sickler]

And it says, you have 30 days to cash it or you don't get it. And she left her number. So I called her. That's a great lady. Right away. And I said, ma', am, first of all, thank you so much. I said, second of all, these motherfuckers haven't had one problem sending me my bills.

[Kevin Clancy]

You haven't get my bills.

[Ryan Sickler]

My bills are going to my current address. Why is this payment going to two addresses?

[Stage Foley]

He's got to get into it with her.

[Kevin Clancy]

Sounds fishy. I got to be honest.

[Ryan Sickler]

I'm not getting into it with. I'm just asking, like, it. And I go, how long have you had it? And she's like, a few days. And I'm like, okay, when's it say I need to cash? And she says, you know, whatever. And I go, listen to me. I can't thank you enough. This is found money. I'd like to split it with you.

[Kevin Clancy]

Whoa.

[Ryan Sickler]

And she's like, no. And I go, I'm not taking no for an answer. If you don't want it, I'm happy to donate to a charity of your choice, but this is money that I would have never had. I wouldn't even had any of it if it's not for you. Like, yeah, tracking if Ryan Sickler lived.

[Guest or Additional Host]

There, he threw your check out.

[Ryan Sickler]

I didn't even open it. And look at it. This lady looked at it. She said, I thought it was for me, an insurance thing. And I was like, you really know? She's like, what's your address? This lady straight up mailed it to me. I let her know when I got it. Like, she was so kind. That's awesome. She said, the fact that you wanted to offer me money or even give it to a charity is more than enough to. For me. I'm good. You just take care.

[Kevin Clancy]

That's amazing.

[Ryan Sickler]

I was like, thank you so much.

[Kevin Clancy]

Good guy.

[Stage Foley]

He's a good guy, man.

[Kevin Clancy]

Good guy.

[Ryan Sickler]

But also the insurance. That's a scam. That is a scam. That is a scam.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Oh, we sent it to you. Oh, yeah?

[Ryan Sickler]

Where?

[Guest or Additional Host]

Oh, to one of your Maryland addresses. Oh, you mean from the 90s. Oh, thanks.

[Kevin Clancy]

Have you ever taken a picture in front of a car that wasn't yours? Oh, no.

[Ryan Sickler]

Well, that one wasn't mine. Okay, so let's talk about this. Yeah, technically. You mean like as a flex.

[Kevin Clancy]

Yeah, just like, oh, here's a nice Lamborghini. Not even flexed in that it's yours. Just like. No, I might never seen a car this nice.

[Ryan Sickler]

I've taken pictures of nice cars before, but not me in it.

[Kevin Clancy]

Okay.

[Ryan Sickler]

You know, what were you.

[Kevin Clancy]

What was the planning to do with that, with that picture?

[Ryan Sickler]

I went to a car show and just took some that I liked or had my daughter get in front of and then I frame them around the house.

[Stage Foley]

That's cool.

[Ryan Sickler]

Cute. I got like a little tile thing going in the house that we can remove them as we update and.

[Kevin Clancy]

Very nice.

[Stage Foley]

I like that.

[Ryan Sickler]

So this picture right here. So I'm going to tell you about this. So this is my 1990 Honda Civic with original rims. I grew up working in a junkyard. I think I've told you guys I bought this car for my friend Shannon's dad. Had 10,744 miles on it at the time. It's 1991 when I'm buying it. But it's a 90 owned by a Japanese dude whose daughter wrecked it. And I mean, I'm saying Japanese, his name was on the thing and he sold it to us because the you hit the front once you with the motor never runs right. But I didn't need a perfect car. So his dad got this fixed up and gave it to me. And I drove this literally to the wheels fell off 300,000 miles up to Maine, down to New Orleans, across the back, three times across the country, through the Rocky Mountains, through the snows, never get stuck. It's a badass little lawnmower. It's a four speed. And I moved to California. And when I'm living at this dump in North Hollywood, I have these. And you may know these. I didn't know I wasn't this trashy I got there. But it's their glass windows and they're slack and you crank it with a handle and they go up like this and they're floor to ceiling and they're just Glass slats. You know what I'm talking about. Your house for my apartment. There's no screen on them or anything. And you crank these glass windows and they just slowly come out like car windows of them.

[Kevin Clancy]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Ryan Sickler]

Almost like vertical or horizontal blinds.

[Stage Foley]

Yes.

[Kevin Clancy]

Like a shorehouse would have some kind of. Great.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Yes.

[Kevin Clancy]

Yeah.

[Stage Foley]

One of those breaks your.

[Ryan Sickler]

So I live in this North Hollywood apartment. No ac, the thing freezes over because it's a wall unit. So I've got the windows open. It's 100 and something degrees. And I'm in the shower. And every time I get out, I see these cats running through my apartment. I'm like, what the.

[Kevin Clancy]

In the apartment.

[Ryan Sickler]

In my apartment. So I end up finding the lady in our building. Now, the building was very much just like Melrose Place, if you remember that. It was a pool in the center and it's a two story and every bodies around that. And I find the lady and I can smell her apartment before I get to it. And I just knock on her door. I'm like, hey, please keep your cats out of my apartment. And she doesn't say anything. Like, just keep Matt. They keep. Every day I come home like there's a different cat in my apartment. So I'm sitting there and I keep my front door open because I'm trash. And she's. She was there. I did. It's so hot. Hot, dude, she's walking by every day. Every day she comes, One day it's a chinchilla, one day it's a iguana, one day it's a this. And one day she comes by with a snake around her neck. And I'm like, lady, what the do you do? And she's drunk. She's a drunk, hardcore alcoholic. And she's. I've tell this. She's like parties, she's hiccuping and everything. She goes, I'm Hugh Hefner's number two zookeeper. And I said. Said, bullshit. And she goes, I am. I go, you are not Hugh Hefner's number two zookeeper.

[Kevin Clancy]

How many zookeepers this guy got, by the way?

[Ryan Sickler]

Also, we'll get to that. I go, no, you're not. She goes, yes, I am. I can prove it. And I go, how? She goes, I'll give you a tour. I go, bullshit. She goes, I will. When do you want to go? I said tomorrow. She goes, here's the address. Pull up here. I was like, if you're bullshitting me, like, lady, we're gonna have problems because I'm your neighbor. She's like, bring your camera.

[Stage Foley]

What were you gonna do to her?

[Ryan Sickler]

Okay, I'm gonna with that little chinchilla or something, you know? I mean, little. Little chinchilla hostage over there.

[Guest or Additional Host]

You know what I'm saying?

[Ryan Sickler]

Like, I don't know where it's at. I take care of it. I don't know where it's at. I take care store it. So I pull up to the Playboy Mansion, the. The like workers entrance. And she tells me to hit. I hit the key pass. Hey, it's Ryan Sickler. I'm here. I'm not going to say her name. We'll call her Diane. I'm here for Diane. Number two zookeeper. And that gate ain't going anywhere.

[Kevin Clancy]

It's also like I. I put it.

[Ryan Sickler]

In reverse and that gate starts opening. Get the out of here right now. And I pull this Honda Civic right in front of Hugh.

[Stage Foley]

Oh, that is bro.

[Ryan Sickler]

Listen, you don't get the jerk. You. You. I've been to the Playboy Mansion again another time for a party. And you take shuttles from the Mondrian over. You don't drive to Hugh Hefner's house and pulling them up. And she's let me pull in the driveway. So I pull this in there and she goes. She said. And. And I cut her out. She's actually right here in the picture.

[Kevin Clancy]

I have cutting people out of. Out of amazing people.

[Guest or Additional Host]

I didn't put her back in this one.

[Ryan Sickler]

And she's like, take a picture. You don't get to park in the driveway at the Playboy Mansion. So boom, I take a picture. No, that's the Honda Civic at the Playboy Mansion right there, y'. All. So I made a hoodie out of it.

[Kevin Clancy]

That's amazing.

[Ryan Sickler]

And so then she takes me on a tour. She's his number two zookeeper. And I start laughing because I'm like, this probably said she was Hugh Hefner's zookeeper. Number one. Said, hey, you're number two.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Like, why would you ever say number two?

[Ryan Sickler]

It has been beat into her head like, you're so they got a whole reptilian place in there I didn't know about. They've got peacocks, albino peacocks. I'm going in the grotto. They've got a monkey cage. And I've got a video prop VHSC somewhere.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Remember VHSCs?

[Stage Foley]

Sure.

[Ryan Sickler]

Of me in the cage. And she's like, go in there. And I'm like, I'm not. I'm not the animal guy. Like, I've Told this before. Like my. I've seen my brother like, take his kids a gator world. And they're all on gators backs. And with the. And I'm like, the whole line's white people. Not even a tan in the line. It's all white people. And I'm like, I don't want to get in there. And she's like, get in there. And she gives me these little green grapes. And I stand in there and I'm telling you, like 50 of these descend on me.

[Kevin Clancy]

Oh.

[Ryan Sickler]

Just made my head run all over me. And it's creepy because they have little tiny hands, paws, but it's like a flesh pad on it.

[Kevin Clancy]

And they're touching.

[Ryan Sickler]

It just feels like this little flesh thing, you know, like Jesus Christ. And then she takes me through like the game room. In this room. Like they had a. I don't know, it was a floor or something was like this thick padding you walk on. And she's just showing me, can't go upstairs. Just like Graceland. Can't go up there. Can't go up there. But I'm getting all downstairs in the entire property. And this lady legitimately was.

[Kevin Clancy]

That's crazy.

[Ryan Sickler]

So she worked for him during the day and kept it together. And then came home and got lit with all his ass.

[Kevin Clancy]

It's a lot of pressure. Number I'm like, Hugh, you know, she's got the chill out North Hollywood, you.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Know, bringing it up. She's taking her work home. You.

[Kevin Clancy]

Oh, man, what a Jesus Christ. I mean, that's crazy.

[Guest or Additional Host]

This. I have this picture that's amazing.

[Ryan Sickler]

And in this is the car I drove to start all this. This is the reason I'm here on your show. And I framed it so when you walk into my place, the first picture on the left when you walk in is this, this. And my daughter's like, why? I said, because that's where it all started. And that's what got us here.

[Kevin Clancy]

Wrote that till the wheels fell off.

[Ryan Sickler]

It's also up at the Honeydew studio too. I got one in there too.

[Stage Foley]

You got it 10,000 miles.

[Ryan Sickler]

300,744 miles.

[Stage Foley]

You put 300,000 on it.

[Ryan Sickler]

Probably a little over it. You know what killed it? It would have kept going. This is funny. You'll like this. Because I do like me some conspiracies. But the canyons killed that thing up and down. Driving those canyons killed that little motor. But I ended up seeing selling it. And this dude wanted to like trick it out, I guess, you know, a Little Civic for race car thing or whatever. And so he comes over and he buys it from me. And I. I, like, I'm. I'm. I kept the original key. I'm petting it goodbye. Like, I'm having an emotional moment with this car, but he's coming to get it now, so I don't even really get to say goodbye.

[Kevin Clancy]

He don't care.

[Ryan Sickler]

And this guy takes it. I'm not bullshitting you guys. Two weeks later, I'm driving with a friend of mine, and we see it sitting on the side of the road. Road. And it's cleaned up. It's got plastic hubs. Remember when you had the plastic on it? It's all cleaned up, and it's got a for sale sign on it. I said, let's call this. See what he's asking for it. I know the history of this car. Let's see if it's ever had any accidents or anything, because it has trust. Call the guy. And we're like, what are you asking for? And he's like, it's way too much money. We're like, how many miles? On it lies about the miles. Any. Any incidents? Accident, accents? Nope. Clean record everything. I was like, huh? He's. Why are you asking so many questions? Because I asked a. Like, all of them. I'm telling myself, my cassettes in there. You got my Orioles cooler in the back. I used to keep my cassettes and a little vinyl Orioles cooler in the back. And I said, well, I'm buying it for my son, and it's his first car. I just want to make sure everything's raised. Like, oh, okay, okay. And it's. I saw it sit on the road for a while, so it kept going.

[Kevin Clancy]

So that's crazy to me. Yeah, that's amazing. I mean, what a perfect way to put a button on it. God damn. An emotional. An emotional story about a 1990 Civic.

[Stage Foley]

You are proper crazy.

[Guest or Additional Host]

When I walked in, if I had.

[Ryan Sickler]

100 million, what car would I buy? And I said, probably an F1.

[Kevin Clancy]

Probably. F150.

[Ryan Sickler]

Probably would.

[Guest or Additional Host]

Probably. But I'd get a couple four wheelers and.

[Ryan Sickler]

Yeah.

[Stage Foley]

Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Ryan Sickler. The special is live and alive on his YouTube page. One of the absolute best. Do yourself a favor. Get over there and check that out. Of course. Listen to the honeydew on the way back.

[Ryan Sickler]

Watch their episodes on both shows.

[Kevin Clancy]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Stage Foley]

Live and alive on YouTube. Congratulations.

[Ryan Sickler]

Thank you so much.

[Kevin Clancy]

Love you.

[Ryan Sickler]

Love you, Kippy.

[Kevin Clancy]

What do you got for him, guys? We're on the Road, Philly. We're playing the Met Dec. 13. The boys are coming home. Biggest venue we've ever played. 3,000 people. Get them tickets. We love you, Circle.

[Stage Foley]

We love you, buddy.

[Ryan Sickler]

Love you guys. Congrats. Congrats to you as well.

[Stage Foley]

We love you. We'll see you next week.

[Kevin Clancy]

Peace.