Jack McBrayer

Summary

Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard

Episode: Jack McBrayer (May 25, 2026)

Detailed Summary

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Overview

In this laughter-filled and revealing episode, Dax Shepard and Monica Padman sit down with beloved comedian and actor Jack McBrayer (30 Rock, Wreck-It Ralph, Zillow Gone Wild). The conversation explores Jack's Southern upbringing, improv comedy roots, unique approach to fame and privacy, and the joys and quirks of his new venture hosting Zillow Gone Wild. Jack also opens up about friendship, authenticity, and the challenges of navigating a public persona while safeguarding parts of his life.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Jack’s Approach to Interviews and Public Persona

• Reluctance to Appear on Podcasts: Jack admits he's typically hesitant to do interviews unless he has something to promote (05:30).
  • Quote: “I didn't have anything to say. Well, now I have a show to talk about. What was I going to talk about?” (05:32, Jack)
• Private vs Public Self: Jack reflects on why he draws a line between his private playfulness and his public image, preferring different tones in different settings.
  • Quote: “I can speak to you in a way that I'm not gonna speak to a six year old. I speak to a stranger in a way that I don't speak to a college roommate. … I think I'm reading the room.” (19:24, Jack)
• Dax’s Counterpoint: Dax describes his opposing philosophy—radical transparency and embracing his full self at all times, even when it’s messy.
  • Quote: "What I refuse to do is act like anything but my full self at all times. That’s my ethos." (18:35, Dax)

2. Childhood & Family in Georgia

• Roots: Raised in Macon, Georgia, later moving to Conyers. Both parents were school teachers (health/PE and social studies).
• Family Dynamic: Jack grew up with his family all working or attending the same school, which meant he was closely monitored but felt supported.
• Fun Anecdote: His mom taught sex ed at Jack’s high school, leading to some embarrassing moments with classmates. (39:29)

3. Improv as Identity Formation & Early Career

• Improv Community: The Chicago improv scene was transformative for Jack; he found his people and honed his comedic voice at ImprovOlympic and Second City alongside soon-to-be stars like Tina Fey.
• Memorable Names & Super Memory: Jack has an impressive recall for dates and names, maintains lists of everyone he’s lived or worked with, and is possibly a bit OCD about personal organization (22:35–23:56).

4. Career Pivots: Auditions, Rejections, and Opportunities

• SNL Dreams and Audition: Jack auditioned the same day as Seth Meyers but wasn’t picked—he describes the pressure and eventual contentment with his path. (50:51)
• Conan & TV Breakthrough: Regular comedy bits on Conan led to 80 appearances and stable income, eventually culminating in 30 Rock (53:54).
• Moving for the Unknown: Jack left Second City on a gut feeling, not knowing what was next—a risk that paid off when opportunities in NYC materialized.

5. 30 Rock and Hollywood

• Created for Jack: Tina Fey wrote the role of Kenneth for him. He describes feeling outclassed on the set by experienced actors but ultimately loved the camaraderie. (61:07)
• Show's Underappreciated Success: Reflects on how, despite its critical acclaim, 30 Rock always felt “on the bubble” — gaining a loyal but not massive following. (63:39)
• Coping with Show’s End: Jack shares that while saying goodbye was emotional, enduring friendships (calling everyone on their birthday) helped soften the transition.

6. Friendship & Birthday Tradition

• Super Connector: Jack is famed for meticulously remembering and calling friends on their birthdays—sometimes six a day—which Dax and Monica marvel at (30:06).
• Playful Side: He’s a devoted bit-ster in real life, leaving joke receipts for chips and “invoices” for party appearances at friends’ houses (28:36).

7. Zillow Gone Wild

• New Hosting Venture: Jack discusses navigating this unscripted HGTV show where he tours the country’s weirdest homes, stressing his intent to celebrate—not shame—eccentric homeowners (87:21).
  • Quote: “I don't want this to be an exercise in humiliation. I want this to be celebratory and exploratory and really lean into the curiosity, the human curiosity we all have.” (87:21)
• Wild Homes Example: The group discusses a home with a three-story room full of shelves, a missile silo “man cave,” and the psychology behind extreme design choices (88:09, 92:13).
• Authenticity as a Host: Jack insists on having genuine first reactions, with producers keeping him “blind” before walking through each property.

8. Philosophies & Personal Quirks

• Minimalism, Gratitude, and Security: Jack expresses contentment with “making do” rather than chasing more fame or wealth, crediting his upbringing for this mindset (78:58).
• Sun Worship: Jack’s trademark love for sunbathing and swimming is both meditative and identity-affirming for him; he jokes he may have been “a lizard or a solar panel” in a past life (71:21).
• Organization: His closet is “immaculate,” color-coordinated, and maintained with pride—Dax draws parallels to Marilu Henner’s hyper-organized closet (23:46).

9. Voiceover Career

• Jack details how he continues to thrive in animation, voicing “signature” characters (mostly sounding like himself) in Wreck-It Ralph, Disney shows, and more (84:11).

10. Ethics, Identity & Social Commentary

• Colorism and Tanning Peptides: The hosts discuss social implications of tanning, colorism, and ethical debates over skin-tone modification (80:28–82:01).
• Authenticity vs Decorum: Monica and Dax relate Jack’s careful approach to their own comfort levels—discerning between “mean vs noticing reality” and drawing lines based on empathy.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Being the “Dirty Southern Rascal” Beneath the Surface:
  • “You speak very nicely, you're very kind, you're offended by some words, and then come to find out you're a very dark rascal.” (16:41, Dax)
• On Acting vs Self:
  • "That was a character."
    "Yeah, but Jack McBrayer was saying."
    "That's true." (26:04, Dax & Jack)
• On Forging a Path:
  • "Once you set up your system, all you got to do is maintain." (23:15, Jack)
• On Sunbathing as Enlightenment:
  • "It is transcendental. I go somewhere else. … This is who I am. This is who I'm supposed to be." (71:21, Jack)
• On Birthday Messages:
  • "They're incredible because they're so long and nice for a very long time, and then they always end with some kind of horrendous [insult]..." (20:06, Dax)
• On Friendship with Alexander Skarsgård:
  • “I'm the godfather of his kids.” (96:51, Jack)
• On Contentment:
  • “Having job security is wonderful. I don't need more money. I don't need more attention. … For me, I'm like, what could be fun? What might this feel like? What would it be like?” (78:27, Jack)

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Important Timestamps

• Podcasting philosophy, Reluctance to interview: 05:30–07:00
• Childhood, family, and Georgia memories: 09:15–13:20
• Approach to privacy, public self vs private self: 18:04–20:51
• Birthday calling tradition, super memory: 21:59–22:35, 30:06
• Closet organization, OCD tendencies: 22:35–23:46
• Second City and improv roots: 42:03–45:34
• Leaving Chicago, SNL ambitions, transition to TV: 48:44–53:54
• On 30 Rock: working with Tina Fey and Alec Baldwin: 61:07–63:05
• Receiving playful party “invoices” & birthday bits: 28:36, 30:06
• Zillow Gone Wild, show ethos, crazy homes: 85:24–91:25
• Sun worship and swimming as self-care: 71:21–72:11
• Peptide tanning, colorism debate: 80:01–82:16
• On contentment and making do: 78:58–79:43

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Episode Tone & Takeaway

Playful, self-deprecating, and deeply warm. Dax and Monica tease out Jack’s contradictions: his Southern politeness and secret dirty humor, his public reserve and private fun, his career ambition and real-life contentment. The hosts repeatedly praise Jack’s empathy, memory, and genuine kindness—while prodding gently at his refusal to let the public see his spicier side.

For listeners:
You’ll come away charmed by Jack’s humility and sense of fun, with an inside look at the creative community of improv, peculiar celebrity rituals, and the earnest (and sometimes wild) human stories behind America’s weirdest homes.

Transcript

[Dax Shepard]

Welcome, welcome, welcome.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, no. What happened?

[Dax Shepard]

I don't know. You know, the yips. We just had a, we had a guest on talking about the yips.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, right.

[Dax Shepard]

So athletes famously get the yips. And what if I got the yip that I couldn't say? Welcome, welcome, welcome. That's how crazy the yips are. Like, you do take this thing you can do, you've done for decades, and all of a sudden you mentally can't do it.

[Monica Padman]

Well, that's such a ding, ding, ding. Because I'm reading a rereading a book right now called Art of Fielding that is this it is. It's about the ex.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. So welcome, welcome, welcome to Armchair Expert. I'm Dan Shepard. I'm joined by Lily Padman.

[Monica Padman]

Hi.

[Dax Shepard]

And today we have a very, very, very funny young man.

[Monica Padman]

A young boy, funniest.

[Dax Shepard]

He's the cutest and the funniest. He's also an Emmy award nominated actor and comedian. Jack McBrayer. 30 Rock, Wreck It Ralph, Zillow Gone Wild. Ding, ding, ding, ding. My new favorite show and forgetting Sarah

[Monica Padman]

Marshall, another ding, ding, ding.

[Dax Shepard]

Very memorable. Three is airing right now of Zillow Gone Wild on hgtv. Or you could stream it on HBO Max, that's what we're doing. Give a little pro tip. But yeah, if you follow the account Zillow Gone Wild, which I do, it's a great Instagram account. It's all these very unique homes. Unique, Yep. And Jack goes and visits these and they're incredible. And before we go, I want to announce some summer armchair anonymous prompts. Here we go. Tell us a foreign object story in body.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, yeah. Foreign object in body.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, Foreign object in body. We love that one. Let's go round three or four of that. Tell us about a time you fought a wild animal.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, wow.

[Dax Shepard]

Tell us about a crazy family secret.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Tell us a crazy stalking story. Oh, we dare go back to stalking.

[Monica Padman]

Stalking.

[Dax Shepard]

They've all been so scary.

[Monica Padman]

Stalking is scary.

[Dax Shepard]

Tell us a crazy home intruder story. Okay, so we have foreign object and body fighting a wild animal, Crazy family secret, Crazy stalking story, or crazy home intruder story. Go to armchairexpertpod.com to submit your story. And Emma, we'll sift through those and pick somebody and hopefully we'll get to talk to you.

[Monica Padman]

We'll talk to you.

[Dax Shepard]

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[Monica Padman]

We do. We do love quints.

[Dax Shepard]

We genuinely do. I've become obsessed with how they do things. They make these European linen shorts and shirts. 100% European linen. And they feel incredible. Lightweight, breathable, but still look polished.

[Monica Padman]

And it's perfect for this time of year. Spring. Loves linen. I feel like everything they make is super luxe, but it doesn't break the bank.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. And the way they keep prices low is they work directly with ethical factories. No middle, no retail markup. So you're getting premium materials at 50 to 80% less than comparable brands like those. Linen shorts start at $34.

[Monica Padman]

I know. I hate to keep talking about the linen shorts, but guys, the linen shorts are really, really cute. They look classic. They look timeless. They look really expensive and they're so comfortable. I was honestly surprised by how good they feel.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, they're very breathable. Wynn is a nice, nice material.

[Monica Padman]

It's a good material.

[Dax Shepard]

Refresh your everyday with luxury you'll actually use. Head to quint.comdax for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada too. That's Q-U-I-N c e.comdax for free shipping and 365 day returns. Quints.comdax he's an object. Georgia.

[Jack McBrayer]

I don't give up.

[Monica Padman]

I. I did that on purpose for you.

[Jack McBrayer]

But you didn't go.

[Monica Padman]

I went.

[Jack McBrayer]

You did?

[Monica Padman]

I sure did. I sure did.

[Dax Shepard]

Tell me all about it. I see you have some notes prepared. Yes, this. You're the first guest to come with their own.

[Jack McBrayer]

I have a monologue.

[Dax Shepard]

Dueling notes.

[Jack McBrayer]

No. I don't want to do this. I don't want to do this.

[Dax Shepard]

I don't want to do this anymore.

[Jack McBrayer]

Kill Dax.

[Monica Padman]

I no longer want to be here.

[Jack McBrayer]

I don't want to be here.

[Dax Shepard]

Where are you coming from? Are you on a whirlwind tour right now? Promoting? Where have you been? Were you in New York a minute ago? Did you just do Seth? When did you do Seth?

[Jack McBrayer]

Oh, gosh. That was back in July.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, okay.

[Monica Padman]

Almost a full year ago.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

More than. Yes. Closer to a year ago.

[Monica Padman]

One full year.

[Dax Shepard]

I know.

[Jack McBrayer]

You are dumb. How do we Start this thing.

[Monica Padman]

We're started.

[Dax Shepard]

Where were you and where are you going?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, this is.

[Dax Shepard]

It's almost over. Is it? Yes, it's almost over.

[Jack McBrayer]

What a dream.

[Monica Padman]

Why is it taking you so long to come on the show? That's our first question.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, you've been invited.

[Jack McBrayer]

I didn't have anything to say.

[Dax Shepard]

What do you mean?

[Jack McBrayer]

Well, now I have a show to talk about. What was I going to talk about?

[Dax Shepard]

Well, let's get into that because I think we deal with this with some guests. We're like, there's just people we're super interested in. And we're like, hey, we'd love to chat with you. And they're like, I have nothing to promote. And then we think, like, is that the only reason to come chat?

[Monica Padman]

You only love us to promote? I don't know.

[Jack McBrayer]

I don't do podcasts. Y' all tell me y' all do it.

[Dax Shepard]

You did Conan's.

[Jack McBrayer]

Because he made me. Okay, he did.

[Dax Shepard]

But is it your policy if you're not promoting something, you're like, I'm not gonna go. Do you feel silly just doing a podcast without something to promote?

[Jack McBrayer]

Well, it's not silly, but I don't know what I would talk about.

[Dax Shepard]

You. Your life, your interesting life. You don't think there's anything there?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. See, when we started the show, it was not helping people promote projects. It was just to talk to. And it started out that way, and then it got sort of tricky where people wanted to promote their product. People started using us, you know, as they should.

[Jack McBrayer]

Well, but explain to me what yalls view of podcasting is.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Jack McBrayer]

Is that fair?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Messiness of being.

[Dax Shepard]

I would probably start with the fact that I had been a guest on them 10 years ago.

[Jack McBrayer]

So before you had your own, you were doing guest.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, Like I did Marin and I did Chris Hardwick and I did whatever. I did these long form podcasts and I remember thinking, oh, I like that so much more than having seven minutes to be really funny and get your three stories in on the talk show and just like being able to relax and shoot the shit, which is my favorite thing to do. I came away from those going, like, I actually enjoy that. I love shooting this shit with someone for an hour. Yeah. So that was the motivation to do it is like, I loved being on them. Why not host one?

[Jack McBrayer]

But were you on those podcasts to promote something or just to chit chat?

[Dax Shepard]

I wanted to be on Maren's show. I want to be on Chris Hardwick's show. Anything That I like. I just would want to be on it or involved like Stern. Stern was the main dream. Yeah. And then I got to do Stern. Oh, had you listened to Stern ever?

[Jack McBrayer]

No.

[Dax Shepard]

Never?

[Monica Padman]

No.

[Dax Shepard]

Not once? Not once. Do you know who he is?

[Jack McBrayer]

Yes, I know who Howard Stern is. Howard Stern.

[Monica Padman]

I know who Howard Stern is.

[Dax Shepard]

You know, I'm certain who. Howard Stern.

[Jack McBrayer]

Kelvin Stearns.

[Dax Shepard]

So has there ever been a show like that you liked as a viewer and you wanted to be on as a guest?

[Jack McBrayer]

Like a show? Yes, of course. Tell me Electric Company and you got

[Dax Shepard]

to be on that episode.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, wow.

[Jack McBrayer]

Nailed it. A Netflix baking show.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. You're a big fan. And you wanted to be on a

[Jack McBrayer]

kid show called Yo Gabba Gabba.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, sure, sure.

[Dax Shepard]

Jack Black, also famously.

[Jack McBrayer]

Exactly. All the Jacks.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

Jack Nicholson.

[Monica Padman]

What if the show, it was just listing all the Jacks.

[Dax Shepard]

You could probably do two hours of list of Jacks.

[Monica Padman]

There's a lot of Jack Kennedy.

[Jack McBrayer]

Is Dax a nickname?

[Dax Shepard]

No.

[Monica Padman]

No.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm insulted. You're calling bullshit on Dax, right?

[Jack McBrayer]

No, no, no. It was just. I really don't know. For example, my real name is Jack and not John.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, okay.

[Jack McBrayer]

So I didn't know if Dax was a nickname for something, but then I couldn't figure out what it would have been.

[Dax Shepard]

Dax is the real name. And then maybe the nickname is Dan, which is really pedestrian.

[Jack McBrayer]

What you're saying a nickname for Dax would be Dan?

[Dax Shepard]

It wouldn't be. But in my case it has become dad and Dan are the two names. Not by my children, but by my friends from Michigan.

[Monica Padman]

It's confusing for all of us.

[Jack McBrayer]

She is rolling her ass. This is Yalls job. I know.

[Monica Padman]

Tell me about it.

[Jack McBrayer]

Wait, so tell me about uga. You're not from from Georgia, are you?

[Monica Padman]

I'm from Georgia. I'm from Duluth.

[Jack McBrayer]

What?

[Monica Padman]

Yes, I know you're from Macon.

[Jack McBrayer]

Born in Macon. When I was 15, we moved to Conyers.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

Right outside Atlanta.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

That's where mom and dad still are. Brother and sister still live in Athens.

[Monica Padman]

Best place ever. Best place ever.

[Jack McBrayer]

It says the coffee cup.

[Monica Padman]

It says the coffee cup. I'm trying to get Dax's children to go there.

[Jack McBrayer]

Okay. Now it's hard to get into. Probably during your time. During my time, it was not as diffic to get into. Still prestigious.

[Monica Padman]

Very prestigious school.

[Dax Shepard]

Macon, Georgia is 85 miles from Atlanta. Something like that.

[Jack McBrayer]

Southeast hour 15. Yeah, it's right in the middle of the state. When I was there, it was a medium sized town. We had the Allman Brothers. We had Little Richard.

[Dax Shepard]

They're both from Macon. Yeah, yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

So my best friend from childhood moved to Georgia, to Macon County. It's a county. Right. As well.

[Jack McBrayer]

Macon is a city. Macon county is a different part of Georgia, but, yeah, there's a city of Macon and a.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

And they're separated.

[Jack McBrayer]

They are.

[Dax Shepard]

Then all my references make no sense, because then when I would visit him, Macon was like, rough and tumble.

[Jack McBrayer]

So I think there was even a movie back in the whatever decade, Macon County Line or something like that.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, okay. Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

And I think that is more along the lines of your buddy.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, it was, like, very rural. You get beat up pretty easy at the bar.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

What was the vibe in Macon? The city?

[Jack McBrayer]

Very straightforward. We had the Macon Mall.

[Dax Shepard]

What'd your mom and dad do?

[Jack McBrayer]

School teachers.

[Dax Shepard]

Both of them?

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

What subjects?

[Jack McBrayer]

Mom has always been health and PE and Daddy has always been social studies.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. I love that he's Daddy.

[Jack McBrayer]

I know dad.

[Dax Shepard]

No, say Daddy.

[Monica Padman]

Keep it. We're never cutting that. We love that.

[Jack McBrayer]

Excellent. I'm a grown up.

[Dax Shepard]

Did they meet at a school teaching?

[Jack McBrayer]

Oh, no, they met as children. They knew each other from way back. We've just been making family for generations. And when we did move to Conyers when I was 15, they did teach at our high school. Mr. Cresswell, who was our principal, was like, daddy's sorority. What is it called? Fraternity Brother at Georgia Southern. And so there was an opening for two teachers. And so Mr. Cresswell just called up mom and dad. So mom and dad were teachers at my school, where also my brother, who's two years older than me, my sister, who's two years younger than me, we all went there, so I was always at school with at least three members of my family.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, my God.

[Monica Padman]

Wow.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Does that not ruin your schooling experience?

[Jack McBrayer]

I mean, I wasn't a bad kid,

[Dax Shepard]

but maybe because, well, you couldn't be.

[Jack McBrayer]

I was terrified. The only downfall is, like, if I crapped out on a test or something, my mom would hear about it before I did.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, they would go and run and tell.

[Jack McBrayer]

Well, they'd be in the teacher's lounge, and Ms. Garrison would be like, jack

[Dax Shepard]

really shit the bed.

[Jack McBrayer]

I don't think that's what they said.

[Dax Shepard]

The kind of language they use, that's where they would get nasty. That's the side of your mom you don't even want to know about. That happens in the teacher's lounge.

[Jack McBrayer]

Why would you even say this?

[Dax Shepard]

Smoking cigarettes and drinking black coffee?

[Jack McBrayer]

Absolutely not. Black Coffee.

[Dax Shepard]

Grow up.

[Jack McBrayer]

That's the worst part.

[Dax Shepard]

Did either of your parents smoke?

[Jack McBrayer]

Oh, gosh, no.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, don't say, oh, gosh. No, my parents smoked.

[Jack McBrayer]

Are you bragging?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, a little bit.

[Jack McBrayer]

They were super cool.

[Dax Shepard]

But we're children of the 70s. You would agree a lot of parents were banging darts. What? Smoking cigarettes. Jack, Jack, I feel like you just came out of the 1930s. You're so innocent.

[Jack McBrayer]

It's just the words you're saying. Banging darts mean smoking. Smoking cigarettes.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

Did you know that?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, because he says it all the time.

[Jack McBrayer]

Did you know it before he said it?

[Monica Padman]

That's a great question. It is a phrase I probably have not.

[Jack McBrayer]

What was that?

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, you're making me feel.

[Jack McBrayer]

Why are you doing this? What?

[Dax Shepard]

It's okay, Jack. It's okay.

[Jack McBrayer]

Just doing casual conversation. Is that where you excuse yourself?

[Dax Shepard]

Would you rather I light up a cigarette and bang a dart in front of you, or would you rather I just do a nice little squirt?

[Jack McBrayer]

How often do you do it?

[Dax Shepard]

30 times a day, maybe more.

[Jack McBrayer]

Does one squirt equal a cigarette?

[Dax Shepard]

No, no, no. Two squirts equals one milligram. That doesn't mean anything to you, but no, it's a moderate dosage of. Yeah, let's put it this way. You know, everyone does those little pouches now. Well, those pouches range from 4 milligrams a pouch to 13. And this is 1 milligram for two sprays.

[Monica Padman]

So is baby stuff. Do you have any vices?

[Jack McBrayer]

I mean, Daddy likes his medicine.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. You like to drink, right?

[Jack McBrayer]

I don't seek it out.

[Monica Padman]

You don't.

[Dax Shepard]

What do you mean you don't seek it out? You think people knock on the door and hand it to you?

[Jack McBrayer]

This is magical elixir.

[Dax Shepard]

Where do these come from?

[Jack McBrayer]

No, when I'm sitting out by the pool, yes. A nice Bud Light. If I'm going to a Mexican restaurant, sure, a margarita. But also, like, sometimes I just feel like I'm pretending of, like, how grownups work. I'm just like, what is your Sauvignon Blanc situation? I don't know what I'm talking about.

[Monica Padman]

I'm cross playing as an adult.

[Jack McBrayer]

I mean, that's the story my life. Half the time I'm just like, oh, property tax, miles per gallon.

[Dax Shepard]

These are adult concepts.

[Jack McBrayer]

A tasting menu. Banging darts. Please pass the banged darts.

[Dax Shepard]

When you get blasted, you'll get blasted, right?

[Jack McBrayer]

Well, I don't care for that term.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, you don't?

[Jack McBrayer]

I mean, if you're at a party, sure I like to have fun. But also I'm old enough now to know how bad the next day feels if you get too blasted.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Not knackered.

[Monica Padman]

What's your preferred word?

[Jack McBrayer]

Tempted by the devil. The devil's.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, exactly. Exactly. I like it, too.

[Dax Shepard]

What was the older brother like? That's two years older than you, Pete.

[Jack McBrayer]

Very intellectual. About to celebrate his retirement.

[Dax Shepard]

What?

[Jack McBrayer]

He works at the UGA library. He does it. Oh, my God. Cool. Y' all might have run into each other. Oh, he's been there for many, many,

[Monica Padman]

many, many, many years. I wish I had. I wish I could say I had.

[Jack McBrayer]

You never went to the library?

[Dax Shepard]

She's never had any technical issues while she was at the library to consult, Pete.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, I was into more hardback books.

[Jack McBrayer]

You're so analogous.

[Monica Padman]

That's what they say about me, you luddite.

[Dax Shepard]

He was super smart. Was he nerdy?

[Jack McBrayer]

He loved reading and he loves math.

[Dax Shepard]

Was he hanging out with the jocks or was he hanging out with the mathletes?

[Jack McBrayer]

He loved his books. There was a great deal of reading.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, how about your little sister? What was her vibe?

[Jack McBrayer]

She was in the plays with me in high school, and then she went on at uga. I think she was getting a degree in journalism, but was waiting tables at the Athens Country Club. And then during the course of that, just as the years progressed, promoted, promoted, promoted. Became the general manager at the Athens Country Club.

[Dax Shepard]

So they're both in Athens?

[Jack McBrayer]

Both in Athens. Katie has since moved away from hospitality. She is a 6th grade math teacher in Athens.

[Dax Shepard]

What rung of the ladder were you at in school? Like, what was your crew?

[Jack McBrayer]

Oh, I don't know. I mean, I can talk to wallpaper, so it's not like I was specific. I could kind of sit at any lunch table I wanted to just because, like, what am I going to do?

[Dax Shepard]

You were friendly.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

You weren't into athletics at all, were you?

[Jack McBrayer]

I mean, I tried cross country for like, half an hour, but I talked to my parents. I was like, if I audition for the play, I might not be able to do all these meets and stuff. And so I talked to the coach, Coach Fifield, and he just let me do the plays, and that kind of set the course for me.

[Dax Shepard]

You used plays as an excuse to drop out of Bruss Country?

[Jack McBrayer]

Use it as an excuse.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, just as his whole career a justification.

[Jack McBrayer]

Thank you, Monica. I feel seen and respected. Go bang that hash.

[Monica Padman]

No, dart.

[Jack McBrayer]

Bang those darts.

[Monica Padman]

You're gonna get it by the end.

[Dax Shepard]

You know what's fun in the audience Right now you've set the hook, basically, which is this is all a facade. You coast under this. You speak very nicely, you're very kind, you're offended by some words, and then come to find out you're a very dark rascal.

[Monica Padman]

You're a dirty boy.

[Dax Shepard]

You're a dirty and a dark rascal.

[Monica Padman]

We've read some text.

[Jack McBrayer]

Oh, no, we come prepared.

[Dax Shepard]

Will you just explain your approach with birthday greetings? Please explain it.

[Jack McBrayer]

All right. I love reaching out on people's birthdays.

[Monica Padman]

That's really nice.

[Jack McBrayer]

And because it is a personal message to them not to be shared with

[Dax Shepard]

the universe, I. E. This, I feel

[Jack McBrayer]

liberated to speak freely and playfully. So, yeah, I will use some off color language.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, I'll just say you'll. You'll.

[Monica Padman]

What do you think is gonna happen?

[Jack McBrayer]

Okay, this is interesting.

[Monica Padman]

What's gonna happen?

[Dax Shepard]

I feel like he's sincere about this.

[Monica Padman]

I know. I do, too. Like, you really don't want people to

[Dax Shepard]

know that you use the word bitch.

[Jack McBrayer]

I've never done that.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, my gosh. Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

Listen, my point being.

[Monica Padman]

Okay, it's the best part. It's so funny.

[Jack McBrayer]

But here's the thing. We're going back to podcasting. This is very public venues, and I have interactions in my life that perhaps are not meant for public consumption.

[Dax Shepard]

Sure.

[Jack McBrayer]

And there's nothing wrong with either, but you understand the dilemma. No.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, I don't. And I really would like to sincerely hear from you. This perfectly lands us to your nice, fun chasm as just personality types. Right? I am Mike. This is me, y'. All. And if you don't like it, I can accept that. But what I refuse to do is act like anything but my full self at all times. That's my ethos.

[Jack McBrayer]

Right.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm on one side, which is like, yes, I have fucked too many people, and I'm an addict, and I have treated people badly, and I've stole, okay, you know, all the dirt.

[Jack McBrayer]

Stole quite a bit.

[Dax Shepard]

Stole fever, rejected. You know, I don't use the word stolen.

[Monica Padman]

What was it?

[Dax Shepard]

I didn't try. You always say try.

[Monica Padman]

Well, because I thought you said it got stuck.

[Dax Shepard]

I just wasn't able to liberate the coins from the thing once I got it into my apartment. But I did steal the parking meter.

[Monica Padman]

He stole a parking meter, but he couldn't get the.

[Dax Shepard]

Lots of stuff.

[Jack McBrayer]

That's illegal.

[Dax Shepard]

Point is, life's too fucking short to

[Jack McBrayer]

not steal a parking meter.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, that, too. But to have a version of myself, I'm protecting from, quote, the broader world Rebuttal.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

So that's just where I come from. And then, yes, I feel your reservation. I'm dying to know.

[Jack McBrayer]

For me, I can speak to you in a way that I'm not gonna speak to a six year old. I speak to a stranger in a way that I don't speak to a college roommate. I mean, call that what you will. I don't think I'm being inauthentic. I think I'm reading the room.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, that's true. That's really true.

[Monica Padman]

Switching a little bit, perhaps.

[Jack McBrayer]

Call it what you are, but do

[Dax Shepard]

you have a fear that you would say something that the general public would react really terribly to?

[Jack McBrayer]

I would not send a text that I send to your lovely wife, Kristen

[Dax Shepard]

Bell, where you use the word bitch pretty recklessly. Allegedly and expertly, I'll add.

[Monica Padman]

They're incredible.

[Jack McBrayer]

Okay?

[Dax Shepard]

They're incredible because they're so long and nice for a very long time, and then they always end with you. You, or some kind of horrendous.

[Jack McBrayer]

Sick of being liars. My point being, I love conversations like, let's go out to dinner. Let's have these conversations.

[Monica Padman]

Well, yeah, you're saying it as if, like, standard. It's standard. And I think also over time, privacy is not a thing anymore. Now that there's social media, people are putting their whole selves out there. I don't think you're on Instagram, are you?

[Jack McBrayer]

No.

[Monica Padman]

You've remained kind of private. But we live in a public world.

[Jack McBrayer]

You do, exactly.

[Monica Padman]

No. And I think it's actually wise that you've remained outside of that.

[Jack McBrayer]

For me, it's all about sanity and calm and avoidance of chaos.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, it is chaotic.

[Dax Shepard]

And do you think you've always been that way, or do you think nurture wise there was some bit of chaos you didn't like?

[Monica Padman]

No.

[Jack McBrayer]

I mean, I think I would be the first to admit I probably have some control issues and maybe this is how it manifests. You know, there's so much that we can't control.

[Dax Shepard]

Let me ask you a very hard question and a sincere one, please. Do you feel like there's parts of yourself that you were hiding for a long time growing up and that that became part of?

[Jack McBrayer]

No, I mean, like, I am who I am, and I've always had great friends.

[Monica Padman]

We met one of your friends here

[Dax Shepard]

who I told you immediately, Alexander Skarsgrd, who I didn't have any feelings about one way or another. Just I admired him in movies and thought his body was gorgeous.

[Jack McBrayer]

In True Blood.

[Dax Shepard]

Very when he told me you were his best friend, the amount that he like ratcheted up in my head as a person.

[Monica Padman]

And I told you immediately, very telling. We were like, oh, you're so cool.

[Jack McBrayer]

He's the best. He's just one of my favorite people.

[Dax Shepard]

How did you meet him?

[Jack McBrayer]

We met May 13, 2010 in New York City.

[Dax Shepard]

Wait, you know the date? Say it again.

[Jack McBrayer]

May 13, 2010.

[Dax Shepard]

You have that kind of memory or just for that date in particular?

[Jack McBrayer]

For a lot of things. Well, yeah. I call you on your birthday every year.

[Dax Shepard]

You're so good about the birthdays. Yeah, you need to know how you keep track of everyone's birthday.

[Jack McBrayer]

Now, I do keep it in a calendar, but for some reason I do just know it. Like, what are you, January 2nd?

[Monica Padman]

Yes. That was really good.

[Jack McBrayer]

It's weird.

[Dax Shepard]

I think you might have this borderline super memory thing because also with the people's names already, like the gym teacher for one quarter, the whole thing, and then these dates, there's a huge overlap with people with that condition and ocd. Are you a little OCD now?

[Jack McBrayer]

See, I don't know the answer to that. You know, there are some people who have legit OCD who can't leave the house without flipping light switches and stuff.

[Dax Shepard]

For sure.

[Jack McBrayer]

That's not me.

[Dax Shepard]

What does your closet look like?

[Jack McBrayer]

It's immaculate.

[Dax Shepard]

So There was a 60 minute segment on it. This is how I even know this. And they went around and talked to different super memory people and they went into all their closets. And Mary, this famous actress, Marilu Henner. Yes, she has it.

[Jack McBrayer]

I remember.

[Dax Shepard]

No, you didn't even see the segment. And you remember it somehow.

[Jack McBrayer]

Well, she's famous.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, but then her closet was like the most color coordinated, immaculate color.

[Jack McBrayer]

I'll send you a photo. It's perfect. It looks like a Uniqlo or something.

[Dax Shepard]

How much do you work on it? Well, how many hours a week do you spend managing that thing?

[Jack McBrayer]

Once you set up your system, all you got to do is maintain.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. And that takes just 20, 30 minutes a week. What's your policy? You get undressed at night. Walk me through it.

[Jack McBrayer]

I've said too much.

[Dax Shepard]

I sleep clothed. I don't want any strangers to think

[Jack McBrayer]

I sleep the outfit that I'm wearing tomorrow. No, but I don't care for dirty clothes laying around. So I have a hamper. But then I don't let it pile up too much because I don't like that.

[Dax Shepard]

Do you step a knee your closet clothes and then begin undressing and Putting items in the hamper and then re hanging the things that won't get washed.

[Jack McBrayer]

Sure.

[Dax Shepard]

Does that all happen in the closet or will you sometimes get disrobed in the bedroom and then move the whole project to the. I think this is telling.

[Jack McBrayer]

It is.

[Dax Shepard]

I do.

[Jack McBrayer]

No, for me, it's the closet. Just because you want to keep the stuff there?

[Dax Shepard]

Yes. I had a hunch it all took place in the closet. Whereas I'm walking and I'm taking clothes off and I'm throwing one on the bed and then I'm throwing one over here. I'll ultimately gather it all, but I don't go to the designated spot.

[Monica Padman]

Interesting.

[Jack McBrayer]

What do you do?

[Monica Padman]

I now, as of a couple months ago, have a walk in closet.

[Jack McBrayer]

It makes a difference.

[Monica Padman]

It makes a huge difference. Because now everything happens in the closet. And I before was a mess, willy nilly, just everywhere. And I would throw it. I throw it on this cushion and then some on the bed. But now that I'm a good steward of my belongings, I do that. I take off my clothes in the closet. I'll put them in the hamper. I'll hang the thing so it looks nice.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. And then you'll get into your nighttime wardrobe. You're jam. Jam.

[Monica Padman]

Still in the closet.

[Dax Shepard]

What do you sleep in?

[Jack McBrayer]

Jack Fella.

[Monica Padman]

No, Foxers jam.

[Dax Shepard]

I would have never guessed that Jack would be our hardest interview. I would not have guessed.

[Monica Padman]

That's fun.

[Dax Shepard]

You won't even say what you sleep in.

[Jack McBrayer]

It's nobody's business.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, my God.

[Monica Padman]

Okay, but part of this might be a little Southern.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm not letting him off that easy. Something else is going on. But I'll let it slide.

[Monica Padman]

We'll get there.

[Dax Shepard]

I'll let it slide. But the notion that people knowing what you sleep in might be.

[Jack McBrayer]

It's nobody's business.

[Monica Padman]

He sleeps in me undies.

[Dax Shepard]

In Europe, I sleep in pajama pants and a wife beater.

[Jack McBrayer]

That's a great story.

[Dax Shepard]

And I have to because. Jack. My legs get sweaty when I sleep.

[Jack McBrayer]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Do your legs get sweaty?

[Jack McBrayer]

Why would you think this is information I'm gonna share with strangers?

[Monica Padman]

We're not strangers. We're best germs of yours.

[Jack McBrayer]

These are what is right, y'.

[Dax Shepard]

All.

[Jack McBrayer]

Why would you think this is appropriate?

[Dax Shepard]

If we were at lunch, would you tell me?

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah. You would?

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. That's good. That's good. There is a circle I could enter. Okay, I gotta go Back to your bits. Cause they're so good. So less people think you're such a goody goody.

[Jack McBrayer]

I'm not a goody goody. I swear. You do in for getting Sarah Marshall. I said some very racy dirty stuff. Dirty grown up things. Grown ups annuities.

[Dax Shepard]

That was a character.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah, but Jack McBrayer was saying.

[Dax Shepard]

That's true.

[Monica Padman]

I think on 30 Rock you said probably some stuff too, but less rare

[Jack McBrayer]

swear words and more just crazy words, made up words. You know, we're celebrating 20 years since that thing premiered.

[Dax Shepard]

20.

[Monica Padman]

That makes me feel old.

[Dax Shepard]

2006, you did it. Wait, Jack, do you love acting? And I'm being sincere now because you get to play a different person and you're not really responsible for it.

[Jack McBrayer]

Have you seen the characters I play? I do not have range, fella. I smile, I talk Southern, I say weird stuff.

[Dax Shepard]

Right. That you don't normally say in front of people. Right. But in the shows you have to say it in front of people. Is that liberating?

[Jack McBrayer]

Well, because then I can blame it on the character, I reckon.

[Dax Shepard]

Yes. What I can tell is that you're not at all burdened by this. Like, this would burden me to have two different presenting versions of myself. Like one I do here, one I do here, and one I do there. That to me would feel burdensome.

[Jack McBrayer]

Well, now I do have to ask, and I'll ask both of y', all, do y' all feel that I behave very differently? To me, I feel like even when I'm making remarks to your wife on her birthday.

[Dax Shepard]

Foul.

[Monica Padman]

It's really bad stuff.

[Jack McBrayer]

It's still me just being in a more playful manner. Yeah, yeah, a little.

[Dax Shepard]

So from my point of view, that side of you is so appealing. I can't even imagine constructing some story where everyone wouldn't like that.

[Jack McBrayer]

I'm not gonna say those words in front of six year olds.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah. But there's no six year olds listening. It's okay.

[Jack McBrayer]

On Zillow Gone Wild.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, we don't have a six year

[Dax Shepard]

old on Zillow Gone Wild. Yes. You have to meet whatever the tone of the show is, where it's at for sure. Okay, one other one you did. Well, you've done a bunch of great bits, which is you have been to many functions at our house or parties, I guess. And they're not functions.

[Jack McBrayer]

You know, this is the first time

[Dax Shepard]

me seeing this house that's too long. And we haven't had as many socially things. Cause kids probably, I would say.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah, no, I get it.

[Dax Shepard]

But one time you came, you called on the way and asked Kristen, is there anything I could bring over and she said, no, we're all sorted. And then you stopped anyways. And you got a bag of, like, ruffles at the store, brought them, put them on the counter, and didn't make a big deal of it, and then left. And after you left, we discovered that you had left the receipt on it and you had circled in highlighter how much you had spent. And then. And then you wrote a little note that said, this is my business manager's email. Please reimburse me for these chips.

[Jack McBrayer]

Okay. I don't remember doing that.

[Dax Shepard]

You don't remember that? Oh, and then here's an even better one in the same vein.

[Jack McBrayer]

That's funny.

[Monica Padman]

You're getting really exposed, but that's what I'm saying.

[Jack McBrayer]

Playful bits that are for y'.

[Dax Shepard]

All.

[Jack McBrayer]

And I realized for your podcast, we're telling the world about it, but they're so good.

[Dax Shepard]

And then this one's the best. Another time you came to a party, you didn't bring anything, or if you did, you didn't leave a receipt. So we're like, oh, that's both.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah, always bring something.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. Then you did to Georgia. Yes, you did.

[Jack McBrayer]

I just.

[Dax Shepard]

We missed it. And there wasn't a whole receipt thing. So we almost had that letdown of, like, oh, man, Jack McBrayer was here, but there's no bit. Where's the paper trail? And then a full week later, we received mail from the post office, and when we opened it up, it was a letter to us saying that you had had a nice time at the party and that you submitting your invoice for the personal appearance fee of $12,000, but that you were going to make some deductions because there were other celebrities there that helped you share the burden.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, no. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, Darcy was there, and you deducted 1500, and Ryan Hansen was there, and you deducted another 1500.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, my God.

[Dax Shepard]

So it brought us down to. Yeah, like, $8,000.

[Monica Padman]

What you are to have as a friend.

[Jack McBrayer]

But see that, that's fun and that's playful. Like, that's fun.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Yeah. You don't mind that story. So I want to know how much of your day between the birthdays. Clearly, you call someone every day. It's someone's birthday every day, Right?

[Jack McBrayer]

Not wrong. Today I had six.

[Dax Shepard]

You had six birthdays. See, this makes me think of, like, Sedaris and his postcard routine. This is a commitment.

[Jack McBrayer]

But also, how much time does that take? I mean, you talk to somebody for two minutes on the phone.

[Monica Padman]

That's really nice. I hate to add one to your list. Don't. I'd love. I'd love to be a part of August 24th. I know. I want one of these, like, bad, bad texts, you know, that Kristen gets.

[Jack McBrayer]

Are you gonna post them?

[Monica Padman]

No, I won't. I post them.

[Jack McBrayer]

I'm nervous about. I feel unprotected here.

[Monica Padman]

I promise I won't. August 24th.

[Jack McBrayer]

We are August 24th. I already have some. August 24th.

[Monica Padman]

Yes. A common one, actually.

[Dax Shepard]

That whole week is insane.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

In my house.

[Jack McBrayer]

Is that true?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. My sister, my mom, Monica. My dead grandmother.

[Jack McBrayer]

What is nine months prior? Year.

[Dax Shepard]

People are going in.

[Jack McBrayer]

Oh, yeah.

[Monica Padman]

They want that warmth.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

They're seeking out that warmth by the fire.

[Jack McBrayer]

Grow up.

[Monica Padman]

It happened to me. I'm the one that came out of that. I'm allowed to say it.

[Jack McBrayer]

Wait, what's your background?

[Monica Padman]

Oh, gosh. Are you a performer? Yeah, I started out as a performer.

[Jack McBrayer]

Did you study theater at uga?

[Monica Padman]

I did.

[Jack McBrayer]

Wonder if we know people in common.

[Dax Shepard]

You're so much older than her. As am I. We're both so much older than her.

[Jack McBrayer]

What's wrong with you?

[Monica Padman]

I know, it's rude.

[Dax Shepard]

I know the truth about our ages.

[Jack McBrayer]

Just shut up, okay? Just shut up forever. Okay?

[Monica Padman]

No more talking.

[Dax Shepard]

And then she did ucb.

[Jack McBrayer]

You did In New York or la.

[Monica Padman]

La.

[Jack McBrayer]

Got it. So we definitely know some people there.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

Crossover.

[Jack McBrayer]

Interesting. Stay tuned for more Armchair Expert if you dare.

[Dax Shepard]

We are supported by Allstate. Checking Allstate first could save you hundreds on car insurance. Not checking that your keys are actually in your hand before you close the car door. Have you ever stood in a parking lot full of sun, staring at your keys, sitting right there on the seat, 4 inches away and completely useless to you? It's a very specific kind of humbling. Yeah, Checking first is a good idea. So check Allstate first for an auto quote. It could save you hundreds. And for fast, reliable help when you need it, add an Allstate roadside plan today. You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings vary. Insurance and roadside assistance plans are subject to terms, conditions and availability. Insurance provided by Allstate North America Insurance Company, Northbrook, Illinois. Roadside assistance plans provided by Allstate Motor Club Incorporated and Allstate Affiliate. Thank you to our presenting sponsor. Grubhub Gold Days is here. Which feels like a dangerous time to be ordering food because suddenly everyone in your life is very interested in what you're eating. Grubhub plus members are getting nonstop savings all month long and if you're not a member yet, you can join for just 99 cents a month for six months. That's a 90% discount off of the usual price. Grubhub plus membership, auto renews and terms apply. Sign up now in the app [e-mail] plus gold. This episode is brought to you by SoFi, the all in one finance app where you can bank, borrow and invest all in one place.

[Monica Padman]

Let's talk bank accounts for a second. The average bank Savings rate is 0.39% in interest. You're earning pennies on your savings. But it does not have to be that way.

[Dax Shepard]

With SoFi high yield checking and Savings, the money barely making moves sitting in your savings account can earn over eight times the national average savings rate. With eligible direct deposit, no account or

[Monica Padman]

overdraft fees, which feels rare these days, you can get your paycheck up to two days early. Perfect for getting ahead of a bill or grabbing what you need right when you need.

[Dax Shepard]

Plus get up to a $300 welcome bonus when you sign up with eligible direct deposit. Sign up for SOFI Checking and [e-mail] Armshare Sofi checking and savings is offered through Sofi Bank. NA member FDIC terms apply. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. So May is mental health awareness month. And I've been thinking about how we all have those things that keep us up at night.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. And it's so easy to think you have it all figured out on your own.

[Dax Shepard]

Right. But the truth is no one has all the answers. Having someone with you, someone to actually listen and understand, it makes a real difference.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. And that's what therapy can be. It's not about having everything figured out. It's about having unbiased support when you're feeling overwhelmed, stuck, or just unsure.

[Dax Shepard]

And betterhelp makes it easier to find that support. They match you with a licensed therapist based on your needs. With over 30,000 therapists, they usually get it right the first time. And if not.

[Monica Padman]

Not.

[Dax Shepard]

You can switch anytime.

[Monica Padman]

I have therapy tomorrow. I'm really looking forward to it. I have nothing to talk about.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

And it's going to be the best session ever. You just get to the root of things.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. You don't have to be on this journey alone. Find support and have someone with you in therapy. Sign up and get 10% [e-mail] Dax that's better. H lp.com Dax. Back to you. Have you ever had any blowback? Like, have you ever said anything that you regretted has that happened publicly?

[Jack McBrayer]

Oh, publicly. I'm sure I have. Well, like in the early days of 30 Rock. Okay, here's a good explanation of something that you seem to be dwelling on.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

So my background is in improvisational comedy, and so I was doing that in the mid-90s to the early 2000s in Chicago. That's kind of where I found my legs. Met Tina Fey there. So we're talking improv Olympic. You're talking Second City. Like, fun, established institutions of comedy. And I felt like a million bucks, like I had found my people. I was on top of the world. What I loved about doing improv and doing improv at that time, I could be any character. I could say anything. I could create any scenario. And it was all in the spirit of this ensemble creation of Playtime. It felt like being a kid on the playground. Pretty magical. Lo and behold, I moved to New York. I'm able to join the New York UCB gang. That was super fun. Paul Scheer, Jason Mantcukas, Rob Hubel, Rob Riggle. So many just Mantzoukas. Come on.

[Dax Shepard]

What a guy.

[Jack McBrayer]

That idiot. We're neighbors. We take hikes a lot. Oh, you do?

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, those must be so fun.

[Jack McBrayer]

Really fun.

[Dax Shepard]

I bet there's a lot of swear words on these hikes.

[Jack McBrayer]

Okay. And again, I'm in that fun sandbox world of improv. Then I get 30 rock, and then you have to do press interviews and say things that go into print. I never had to do that before 2006. This is also the advent of social media, the advent of smartphones. Things are being recorded. Season one. I'll never forget, there was an incident with Michael Richards at a standup club.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, he used the N word.

[Jack McBrayer]

And you start realizing, like, oh, the Internet is forever. And so I did start getting very self conscious. I was censoring myself in improv scene.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, in improvs, even.

[Jack McBrayer]

And so then I kind of just had to take some inventory and just be like, okay, what am I comfortable with? What am I not comfortable with? That's why I tend to be more relaxed in conversation, at dinner, at lunch, when there aren't microphones and cameras pointed at me and just understanding that the words that I say will follow me for a very long time. And so, yeah, maybe this is controlish. Am I being cautious about that? Very likely. Do I feel that it is keeping

[Dax Shepard]

me from any happiness?

[Jack McBrayer]

No, absolutely not.

[Dax Shepard]

Right, right, right. You don't feel like, I wish people understood this about me and I can't tell them or.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

Is that fair?

[Dax Shepard]

Totally fair. I also think there's some relevant context from where you're from, Right. Which is like, the South's very polite. There's a lot of decorum. We spend a lot of time now in Nashville. I observe it all. Yeah. Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

Oh, fun. I was just there in my March. Reese Witherspoon's birthday. Oh,

[Dax Shepard]

yeah. Really sad we weren't at that party.

[Jack McBrayer]

Not yet.

[Dax Shepard]

Not yet.

[Jack McBrayer]

It's still going on. Yo. I could have fun parties.

[Monica Padman]

I know. Of course, because you're fun to be around.

[Jack McBrayer]

And that's in. Thank you.

[Dax Shepard]

And people know you will never speak out of school.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

Until you come on a podcast where

[Dax Shepard]

people are hammering, shooting darts, blowing darts, and banging spray.

[Jack McBrayer]

You were so stupid.

[Dax Shepard]

But both parents, school teachers. Kristen's met them. She's gone out to eat with them somehow.

[Jack McBrayer]

She has?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

She said she loved her Mesa Grill a thousand years ago in New York City. Oh, they love her.

[Dax Shepard]

But they're pretty pg, I'd imagine, right?

[Jack McBrayer]

If they're school teachers at school. They are.

[Dax Shepard]

But, I mean, they had an naughty side, too.

[Jack McBrayer]

Well, I'm gonna say something I've never said in public before, but this is gonna bite me in the butt, I'm sure. So mom was PE in health at my high school, and so a great number of my classmates would take her health class, the curriculum for sex education in Conyers, Georgia, at that time period. And so Betty McBrayer would go and tell classes about her exploits with Jimmy McBrayer. Okay. So I had friends at this new school that I had transferred to. Coming up. Me, hey, you should probably never go in your hot tub again.

[Monica Padman]

Oh,

[Dax Shepard]

wow.

[Jack McBrayer]

That kind of thing. And also, like, they were young parents. They're very funny, the whole family. We're goofy and we joke. It's not like we come from some buttoned up and puritanical kind of thing.

[Dax Shepard]

No. Were you guys religious?

[Jack McBrayer]

We went to church, but we went to Methodist church, and that's mostly social.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Tell me, like, Methodist versus what?

[Jack McBrayer]

Baptist. Baptist. A little more hardcore. Ours was Cherokee Heights United Methodist Church, and Mom and dad both went there. Dad's mom. My grandma was mom's Sunday school teacher. You know, that kind of thing. It's just like a multi generational let's go to church kind of thing. But again, it was a very relaxed. It really was about the social aspects. Once I learned the Golden Rule, I was like, okay, I got it.

[Dax Shepard]

What's the rule? Do unto others as you do unto yourself.

[Jack McBrayer]

Are you asking me what the golden rule is.

[Dax Shepard]

I am. Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Yes, that is correct.

[Jack McBrayer]

Find Jesus.

[Dax Shepard]

Is that it?

[Jack McBrayer]

That is it. Oh, well, I had it.

[Dax Shepard]

I. I don't feel as though you got it. There's so many, like, thou should not kill. Seems like a golden rule should be. That's pretty. That should be high up there.

[Jack McBrayer]

It's a command.

[Dax Shepard]

But I guess if doing unto others as you do on yourself rules out

[Jack McBrayer]

murder, probably you think it's pretty good umbrella.

[Dax Shepard]

Unless you're suicidal.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. It's not every.

[Dax Shepard]

That's the truth. Yeah. Sometimes the truth has to be said out loud. Jack.

[Jack McBrayer]

What's wrong with.

[Monica Padman]

This is where we divide.

[Dax Shepard]

How did you end up in Indiana for school? Why did you pick the.

[Jack McBrayer]

I wanted to go somewhere outside of Georgia. With all due respect to Georgia. Love Georgia. I was just like, let me try something else. There was a program that I thought I wanted to do at the time, and they were offering me some money.

[Dax Shepard]

And what was the program?

[Jack McBrayer]

I studied theater management.

[Dax Shepard]

Tell me what that entails.

[Jack McBrayer]

I suspect it was essentially, they're like, oh, you're not that great of an actor, but you're kind of smart, so you're going to help raise our gpa. Oh, but at the end of the day, I took a bunch of. Of theater courses, but I was also taking a bunch of business courses, which, as it turns out, comes in very handy later in life. I have a lot of active friends who are not very financially literate. Yeah, they're not very business savvy. And so I'm like, oh, well, I got this.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, it's funny, it's shocking. And then it's. It shouldn't be shocking at all. It's like these people already declared they were into the arts, but you are shocked when you hear, like, wait, how would Nick Cage not know that he spent all of his money right on the island? The islands are pricey. It's the maintenance that gets you, J. That's.

[Jack McBrayer]

They get you. They don't show you those prices.

[Monica Padman]

You think you're just buying a jet, but it's the gas.

[Dax Shepard]

It's the gas.

[Jack McBrayer]

That's what gets you.

[Dax Shepard]

And then you go from there directly to Chicago. What prompts that move?

[Jack McBrayer]

I wanted to try a big city that maybe wasn't Atlanta. Again, with all due respect to Atlanta, I just knew that I would be always coming back to Georgia. Let's see what else is out there? And because I was in Indiana, I had visited Chicago, I had visited Indianapolis, I had visited St. Louis, I'd visited Louisville. So Chicago Was one that I'd visited. I really loved it. And some buddies of mine who had graduated the year before were already living there. I knew there was a room available. So it just made a very easy transition.

[Dax Shepard]

When you went there, no goal of doing comedy yet?

[Jack McBrayer]

Not yet.

[Dax Shepard]

You end up going to a Second City show. Right? Is that how it starts?

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah. Changed everything. It was the summer of 1995 and there was a terrible heat wave. Like people were dying.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, you said like 400 people died.

[Jack McBrayer]

People died like they were putting them in refrigerated trucks. The mortuaries were full. It was bad. I lived.

[Dax Shepard]

Lived. Well, you're from Georgia.

[Jack McBrayer]

I mean, luckily I was just like, this is kind of hot.

[Dax Shepard]

Like it's one of those where you

[Jack McBrayer]

take a very cold shower right at the end of night and you just lay in bed soaking wet and just pray for sleep. I know. It was one of those people were saying, like, their bar of soap in their shower would melt. It was hot.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, my God. It was very hot. At 1:30 or something, people were dying. Did you have the big box fan in the window blowing on that wet physique? Well, we knew that night you were asleep. A nude, I guess, because you were wet. Yeah, I know you didn't say it, but we just figured it out.

[Jack McBrayer]

Okay, figure whatever you want the rest

[Dax Shepard]

of me out then.

[Jack McBrayer]

Idiot. And so it was so hot. My roommate was just like, well, you know, there's this comedy theater downtown. You know, they do free improv, they got cheap beer and it's air conditioned. And I was like, let's do that. Went there. And I was like, these people are living my best life. These people are doing exactly what I want to do. I didn't know that this was a thing thing. And they are hilarious. And here's what I'm very excited about, is that over the years, so many of those people that I saw that inspired me. I've been able to work with them. And that is a big deal to me. I'm very proud.

[Dax Shepard]

Yes. That first show, who was in it?

[Jack McBrayer]

Adam McKay, Rachel Dretch, Scott Adsett. I think John Glazer was there. Scott Allman, maybe Jenna Jolovitz. Just some heavy hitters. I'm actually going to Chicago tomorrow.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, you are?

[Jack McBrayer]

And so I'm going to make sure I get to Second City and see a show.

[Dax Shepard]

So you would start classes there? I went through the ground lease. I'm not totally sure how Second City works. But there's classes. Yeah, correct.

[Jack McBrayer]

So I started taking classes. And then you just you know, elevate up the ranks. Your last class, you put on a big show. There are kind of open auditions to join the touring company. That's kind of like your entry level to Second City. So I auditioned, and I eventually got on the touring company.

[Dax Shepard]

Where do you guys go? Do you go everywhere?

[Jack McBrayer]

Ooh, Ohio.

[Dax Shepard]

You went to Ohio?

[Jack McBrayer]

Great deal of Ohio.

[Dax Shepard]

You do, like, corporate things?

[Jack McBrayer]

A lot of corporate things, but a lot of colleges, performing arts centers, and Second City is a very established and illustrious institution. I was so proud to be there. And it was interesting because I was kind of forging my own path. And sometimes you'd get frustrated because I'd be real excited about getting the touring company. And you'd try to tell a friend back home or somebody in your family or something. They'll. Oh, you know, they don't understand what it is.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

The way to it. They don't really get what a big deal it is.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

But I knew it was a big deal, and so I kept going. Kept going. Got put on a resident stage. Was there for many years.

[Dax Shepard]

Is there, like, a main stage there?

[Jack McBrayer]

There's a main stage, and I was on the ETC stage, which was the studio theater.

[Dax Shepard]

And so you were there for seven years. What were you doing for employment?

[Jack McBrayer]

So when I first got there, I was waiting tables. Got fired for what?

[Dax Shepard]

You seem like you'd be a great waiter.

[Jack McBrayer]

First of all, I'm a very good waiter. I did mess up, though. I was giving coug coffee to my regulars and not charging them for coffee. And then they leave $2 for a tip, and I'd keep the $2.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Jack McBrayer]

I'm stealing thievery. Hey,

[Dax Shepard]

people are still gonna love you. You didn't, like, seat someone with COPD in the smoking section or anything like that? It wasn't that kind of. Yeah, you didn't have that kind of infraction network where you sat someone clearly on a oxygen tank in the smoking section or.

[Jack McBrayer]

That is very specific and very strange.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, but that's not why you got fired.

[Jack McBrayer]

I know.

[Dax Shepard]

No, it's just old fashion.

[Jack McBrayer]

Okay. It was coffee.

[Monica Padman]

Were you trying to steal, or were you like, No, I just want to be nice and give these people some free coffee.

[Jack McBrayer]

That. But also, like, I was working the breakfast shift. One person running around that floor. All of these people just wanted to eat their oatmeal and drink their coffee, read their newspaper and smoke cigarettes before they went up to work upstairs. We were in the basement of a big old office building, and so they're like, come on buddy. And so I was just running around. I was like, don't worry about it. Out of kind of necessity. But it was stealing.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, no, nothing.

[Jack McBrayer]

Proud of it.

[Dax Shepard]

Where'd you go on to after that?

[Jack McBrayer]

Tempin, Navigant, consulting. And now here's a life hack I've learned. If you're gonna be in a job like that, make yourself indispensable.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, and how does one do that? That's easily said.

[Jack McBrayer]

Well, I was in charge of creating the filing system, and you just create it in such a way that you were the only one who knows where everything is. And, I mean, don't get me wrong, they could have figured it out, but I knew where it was.

[Dax Shepard]

Immed, the Rosetta Stone.

[Jack McBrayer]

If they, yes, knew the secret code, decoding rings. But it goes back to. Maybe that is where I don't want to be so cavalier as to say ocd, because that is a legit hard thing for people to deal with. But whatever my tendencies in that world are, sometimes it comes in handy. And I'm not gonna lie, I have everything on my phone. I'm talking about, like, a list of every teacher I've had in my life, a list of every roommate I've ever had.

[Dax Shepard]

Really?

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah, why not?

[Monica Padman]

Well, Cause it takes.

[Jack McBrayer]

Cause that's a crazy person.

[Dax Shepard]

Creating the list sounds great. It's creating the list that probably is where.

[Jack McBrayer]

See, that's my point. Once you do the thing, then you don't have to do the thing ever again.

[Dax Shepard]

That's true. That's true. I would assume you were friends with Tina while you were in Chicago.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yes, more so. Her husband, Jeff Richmond, who is my

[Dax Shepard]

director at Psycho City, and who was the musical.

[Jack McBrayer]

He was the musical supervisor. I think that was his title at SNL and then joined us for 30 buck. Composer and director. And I've known Jeff longer than I've known Tina. I mean, like, they're family.

[Dax Shepard]

And so she was charmed by you, I presume. Oh, well, she ended up writing.

[Monica Padman]

Clearly a little too late.

[Dax Shepard]

She wrote the role of Kenneth for you, so there's a lot of ground laid before that happened. Corinth.

[Jack McBrayer]

Correct.

[Dax Shepard]

What causes you to leave Second City and go to New York? And was that a hard and scary decision?

[Jack McBrayer]

Very good question, Dax. And thank you.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, it's the first one. I got one.

[Jack McBrayer]

Been here, like, three hours ago. Was it hard to leave Second City? Yeah, it was. I left February 3rd, 2002. The reason I know that is because every February 3rd, the stage manager will film your final night and they do a big thing where everybody says nice things. You get to do your favorite scene. So I have the DVD of My Final Night at Second City. Every February 3rd, I'll watch it. So that was 24 years ago. But it was such an important time in my life that changed everything. But, yes, it was a big deal. I had a job. I was doing fine. The ETC Gig was one of the best gigs in Chicago. Etc. The studio theater was, I think, a Thursday through Sunday schedule. So you always had Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday off.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

Main stage was perhaps the more recognized. Whatever, bigger stage. But they were working six nights a week, eight shows a week, and they were getting paid like, maybe $14 more. I was like, I'm good. Thank you.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

I'll stay right here. But to leave was a big deal, and it was a big decision. But it was one of those things when your skin feels tight and you're just like, let's see. Let's see what's next. Let's see what else I can do. Let's see what the next thing is. It felt exciting, scary.

[Dax Shepard]

When you were at Second City, did you have SNL dreams?

[Jack McBrayer]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Same.

[Jack McBrayer]

Think that's pretty common. I think a great number of comedians in general, no matter if you're at an established theater or not, that show was so important to me growing up. Quoting the dumb bits and imitating the characters and it being such, like, a reference point for so many people just in my life, in my world.

[Dax Shepard]

You could find your people in school by. Who liked snl. Well, yeah. Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

I don't know. I felt so cool watching it. Like it was late at night. It was irreverent. It felt naughty. It was like, timely, topical. It impacted. Affected me in such a way. So of course I wanted to do it. They did see me.

[Dax Shepard]

You got to audition?

[Jack McBrayer]

I got to audition. I don't think they've seen the tape. No, of course it didn't happen. I auditioned the same day as Seth Meyers.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, you did? Yes, in New York.

[Jack McBrayer]

In New York. It flew me out.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. What was your nerve level?

[Jack McBrayer]

Oh, very high. Quite high. Very high. And it's one of those things where, of course, I was not fit for this show, but, man, just to be able to be on that stage, for me, just being in an airport and having somebody hold up your name on a sign.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, it's so cool.

[Jack McBrayer]

Wig and throw it off at me.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

But I got to be on 30 Rock. That is a show that is based on SNL. That is a show that is produced

[Dax Shepard]

by Lorne Michaels and written by the previous head writer.

[Jack McBrayer]

I'll do that.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

When you moved to New York, did you already have something set up? Did you know you were going to start working at Cool?

[Jack McBrayer]

No. I seem so enthusiastic. No, no, no. The reason I went to New York was Jeff Richmond taking care of his boy. Jack McBrayer was remounting a show called Hamlet, the musical that he had originally staged in Chicago 100 years earlier. And he said, hey, I just heard you're leaving Second City. Would you be interested in doing like a three month run of this show that we did in Chicago? And I was like, yeah, I got nothing else to do. So my final night was February 3, 2000. I was in a U haul with all of my junk in a car on February 5, 2002.

[Dax Shepard]

So you quit before knowing you were going to New York.

[Jack McBrayer]

Isn't that crazy?

[Dax Shepard]

That is. Why did you even decide to quit?

[Jack McBrayer]

My skin felt tight. It was time to go. You just listen to your gut. Well, surely y' all have had that where you just, you know, something either feels very right or, you know, something feels not very right.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, but I've never had that conundrum where while one thing was a safety net. Right, that's fair. I've had that city in Detroit going, like, I gotta get out of this city within hours or I'm gonna wake up and be 50 and an alcoholic. Like, I could just feel where it was all heading. But I wasn't giving up something fantastic or any safety or something I'd worked seven years to achieve.

[Jack McBrayer]

You're not wrong. It was scary, but also it made me feel brave and strong, you know, all that kind of stuff. And also, like, the genuine curiosity, what could this. Who could I meet? Where could I go? What is going to happen? That felt fun to me. That to me outweighed any of the fear.

[Dax Shepard]

And were you about 29 or 30 at that point?

[Jack McBrayer]

I was 28 when I did that. Turned 29 in New York.

[Dax Shepard]

So how quickly do you get immersed in Late night with Conan O'?

[Jack McBrayer]

Brien? So my first one would have been March 3, 2002.

[Dax Shepard]

Wait, so you left in February and one month later you're on Conan.

[Jack McBrayer]

Okay, but it's not like, oh, he's brilliant. No. So many people who were writing for Conan o' Brien had come from Chicago, had come from Second City, were already working with Conan. They heard that I was in town. They're like, hey, McBride's here. Just plug him into something.

[Monica Padman]

What about Hamlet, the play what happened to that?

[Jack McBrayer]

Oh, it was still going.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, you're doing that, too?

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah. Because you could do a bit for Conan in the middle of the day, go do the show at night.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, wow.

[Jack McBrayer]

Multitasking.

[Monica Padman]

A lot of jobs.

[Jack McBrayer]

So many jobs. Also in New York, you kind of had to.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

Did you live in New York?

[Dax Shepard]

No.

[Jack McBrayer]

Bless your honor.

[Monica Padman]

Stop trying to make it about me.

[Dax Shepard]

We see what you do.

[Jack McBrayer]

See, this is how people talk when they ask questions.

[Dax Shepard]

Good people like you.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Nice people.

[Monica Padman]

You're right.

[Jack McBrayer]

I hate everything about this.

[Dax Shepard]

Do you remember what your first bid on Conan was?

[Jack McBrayer]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

What was that?

[Jack McBrayer]

I was the overconfident new prison inmate written by Brian Stack, who's now at Colbert, and he was Second City. So many people in my life have just taken care of. And when I tell you, I am so grateful. That's why you gotta be nice to people, dad.

[Dax Shepard]

I'll start now. I'm gonna start today.

[Jack McBrayer]

But it was an overly confident new prison inmate, and it was very special for me because I hadn't done hardly any TV before that. I didn't know how this worked, and I knew that Conan was okay with the bit. And so it kind of started a fun tradition of people just like, just put Jack in there kind of thing. Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

You ended up 80 appearances in the next three years.

[Jack McBrayer]

And that was paying some bills for any of the UCB kids. Like, that was the gig.

[Dax Shepard]

Hell, yeah. The best 80 paychecks you're getting, what, some kind of SAG minimum or after? Minimum. Like 600 bucks every time?

[Jack McBrayer]

Maybe you're so starving in New York you gotta move to New York. But no, it was the gig. I was like, I have arrived.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm here on TV at night.

[Jack McBrayer]

Can I tell y' all so something. I haven't told anybody this, but I think this is Germaine. Is that the right one?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Relevant.

[Monica Padman]

Is that good? Good.

[Jack McBrayer]

Is that correct? But every time I'd go to do a bit for Conan, it filmed in 30 Rockefeller Center. So I'm taking the F train from Alphabet City in Manhattan and get off at the Rockefeller stop. I'm a person who, if I find a penny, heads up, I'm going to hold on to it, because that's a lot like a penny. If I find a penny tails up, I'll flip it to be heads up for the next person.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, wow.

[Monica Padman]

So nice.

[Jack McBrayer]

So nice. It's disgusting.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, it's more than that. You're so busy between the lists and the having to stop for the penny I just feel like your days are so busy.

[Jack McBrayer]

How much time do you think it takes to flip a penny?

[Monica Padman]

Are you stepping over cracks and stuff too?

[Dax Shepard]

You got a whole thing with those.

[Jack McBrayer]

I don't believe in bad luck.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, gosh, I like that.

[Monica Padman]

I like that.

[Dax Shepard]

Tails up penny.

[Jack McBrayer]

Well, then it's good luck for somebody else. So every time I'd come to do a bit for co Conan, and if I found a penny heads up in the subway stop or in the building of Rockefeller, I'd hold on to it. I had this whole, like, little box and stuff that I just put them in there. Lo and behold, you get on a show called 30 Rock. And I was like, that's because of you.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, I like it. Do you still have it?

[Jack McBrayer]

Of course.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm trying to be ridiculous.

[Monica Padman]

I know.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm just next to his list.

[Jack McBrayer]

I've got a PDF.

[Dax Shepard]

You've been doing that for three years and I'm sure you're pretty content. And it's wonderful because you're on t every couple weeks. And obviously we all worship Conan.

[Jack McBrayer]

And I was doing shows at UCB. I was on top of the world.

[Dax Shepard]

And then 2000 and what year is it?

[Jack McBrayer]

Like tail end 2004, beginning in 2005.

[Dax Shepard]

When do you find out that 30 Rock is going to be a show?

[Jack McBrayer]

Well, I took a break and came to LA for a year. Almost a year.

[Dax Shepard]

Another wild move, right? When you're on Conan and things are going well and you're at ucb, you came here for a year.

[Monica Padman]

Well, yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

I mean, think about it this way. For three years, you're doing this thing and you're having a ball. But SNL wasn't hiring me. I had done bits for Conan. It's not like I could have elevated further. There I was doing my shows at ucb. I was like, okay, but what else? And not out of discontent, but just out of curiosity, what else? Also, New York is very expensive and it gets very cold.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. And you're from Georgia.

[Jack McBrayer]

I'm from Georgia. And it got.

[Monica Padman]

I can't handle that. Madam cannot handle that.

[Jack McBrayer]

So I was like, let me try la. Let me go be broke and tan los felas.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, I know.

[Dax Shepard]

And what was that year like?

[Jack McBrayer]

So fun. I was just like, look at me, I'm in la.

[Monica Padman]

Green juice and stuff.

[Jack McBrayer]

I don't go there.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Jack McBrayer]

Too far. Yeah. Monica.

[Dax Shepard]

He's oldfashioned. He is a sun worshipper. He believes in getting like six hours of sun a day.

[Monica Padman]

I believe in that as well.

[Jack McBrayer]

Keeps you young.

[Dax Shepard]

They say it's really good

[Monica Padman]

sunbathing, really good for your skin.

[Jack McBrayer]

Here's the thing. Somebody's got to look into that again because it just makes me feel good.

[Monica Padman]

I agree.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm with you.

[Monica Padman]

Vitamin D is real.

[Jack McBrayer]

Thank you. People have so many deficiencies.

[Dax Shepard]

I have an unpopular take. I'm only very sparing with sunblock, and it's only in a few spots. And I feel like sun's good and people hate that about.

[Jack McBrayer]

I know. But also, we got to take care of so much other stuff. That gets exhausting to me. I'm like, right, There you go.

[Dax Shepard]

Something's got to give.

[Jack McBrayer]

Dishwasher repair. What else do growing up say?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, dishwasher. Okay, so you came here, you weren't drinking green juice, but living my best life.

[Jack McBrayer]

I'm Tempin. Oh, wow. So I'm living in Los Feliz. Bought my 2004 Hyundai Accent from Enterprise rental car, which I still have to this day.

[Dax Shepard]

No way.

[Monica Padman]

Wow.

[Dax Shepard]

22 years later, you're still.

[Jack McBrayer]

22 years later, you're still in that car. And I just hit 65,000 miles.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, my God. Wait, you've been driving like a thousand miles a year.

[Jack McBrayer]

Okay, so think about it this way, though. That one year I was here in Tempin, so I had to drive all the way to the west side Teleflora. I worked there for several months, but during the course of that, booked Talladega nights, got some arrested developments, and eventually got 30 rock. So within the year that I was here, I got 30 rock, which took me back there. And because of that, I just left my car in a garage for seven years.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, for seven years.

[Dax Shepard]

It didn't start when you got back. You needed to call a tow truck to jump it?

[Jack McBrayer]

Well, no, I had a roommate who had started up for me.

[Monica Padman]

Oh.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, that's great. Well, that was the piece of the puzzle I needed.

[Jack McBrayer]

Really?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Yes. Otherwise, you had a world record on your hand for the longest batteries, sat stagnant, and then working.

[Jack McBrayer]

This is the worst day of my life. The worst.

[Dax Shepard]

So you go back to New York, but now you go back. Were you a season regular right out of the Gates series?

[Jack McBrayer]

Regular? Yes, I was. Remember, it was not a sure thing. 30 Rock took a while for people to tune into and for NBC to have enough confidence to keep us going. So it was tenuous the first year. Yeah. And I mean subsequent years. But I just knew to keep my side of the street clean, just do the job, show up on time, be nice to people. Dax?

[Dax Shepard]

Uh huh. Pick up the pennies.

[Jack McBrayer]

Pick up the pennies. I was just so excited to have the job.

[Dax Shepard]

You loved it all seven years.

[Jack McBrayer]

So fun. New York eventually let me know that we were not meant to be together.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, in what way?

[Jack McBrayer]

Everything. It was just the amount of people and the cold and the gray. What a wonderful, wonderful change in my life, my time there brought about. I'm not built for that town.

[Dax Shepard]

It can feel oppressive for me. If I'm there for a long time, I'm like, oh, just too much. Take me to the water, take me to the park somewhere. Get me out of this zoo. Do you get intimidated by other people? I guess I'm really curious what it's like to work with Alec Baldwin.

[Jack McBrayer]

Oh, scared, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Terrified, sure.

[Jack McBrayer]

Terrified to this day. No, it was one of those things where pretty much everybody on the call sheet was so much more established and just had so much more experience than me that I was just like, do the job. Hit your marks. I mean, to be fair, Alec was brilliant on the show. And I think he knew very early on I'm not gunning for his job. I am happy to be here. I am here to make this all look as good as possible.

[Dax Shepard]

You are not a threat.

[Jack McBrayer]

I'm a team player. I was not a threat. I'm not a threat to blind kittens.

[Dax Shepard]

Right.

[Jack McBrayer]

But no, the whole thing was intimidating, but also it was just fun to kind of like, prove yourself and to be like, I can do this. Y' all can count on me. Even to the writer's room, y' all give me anything that you want me to do because I can do it.

[Dax Shepard]

There's something about being appreciated by Tina that feels so good. It's almost like an anointing, I guess. For her to like you and you make her laugh and she repeats things you did that she liked. Is a very, very rewarding scenario, isn't it?

[Jack McBrayer]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, I kind of just worship her a little bit.

[Jack McBrayer]

Of course. But I will say this too. She doesn't suffer fools, so she chooses people for a reason. Uh huh.

[Monica Padman]

That's why she's never come on this show. So she hasn't picked us yet.

[Jack McBrayer]

How do I change the subject?

[Monica Padman]

Can you probably text her and tell her we'd love to have her?

[Jack McBrayer]

I'm going to fake a seizure real quick.

[Dax Shepard]

Were you sad when it ended or were you also getting that familiar? Okay, time for something new.

[Jack McBrayer]

Good question. It was a mix. All of us, at different points, we kind of just burst into tears, like at the most random thing. I'll never Forget. I was like, this is my last free haircut.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

Oh, no. I'll never forget Jane Krakowski walking down the hall. It was me and our friend Alethea, who's in wardrobe, and we were just like laughing at some Internet thing and we're like, ah. And Jane just burst into tears because she's like, we're not gonna see this anymore.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, it is sad.

[Jack McBrayer]

So that was indeed emotional, but I was excited. And also I wasn't worri that I was never gonna see these people again. I call all of them on their birthdays.

[Dax Shepard]

Right? Right. At least once a year.

[Jack McBrayer]

Well, and I'm telling you, for the 20 year anniversary, we gotta do something, right?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

We gotta do a party or a panel or a table read or something.

[Dax Shepard]

Were you not frustrated? I remember when I would watch the show, I would think, I'm so confused why this show isn't as big as Seinfeld. I thought it deserved to be a mammoth hit. And every year they kind of put it on the bubble the same way they did. Parenthood was like, are we gonna bring it back? Are we not?

[Jack McBrayer]

Well, I mean, I'm kind of glad that I didn't have to worry about that. So you could kind of sense the writing on the wall. We were talking about, like the introduction of streaming. We're talking about the surgeons of cable shows, you know, the Sopranos, Mad Men, all these things from cable were such heavy hitters. Also, what's my frame of reference? You know, like, this is my first show ever. But I could easily tell that we were not getting the numbers that Friends, Seinfeld, Will and Grace, all these legacy NBC shows. Again, that was not my fight to fight and so was like, all right,

[Dax Shepard]

do I have a job tomorrow? But it just felt like it deserved it. It was so grown. It really was.

[Jack McBrayer]

You know, the people who like it, really like it, and the people who don't, they.

[Dax Shepard]

They don't get it.

[Jack McBrayer]

Are. My family are mostly.

[Dax Shepard]

Are mostly back in Macon. And

[Jack McBrayer]

stay tuned for more Armchair Expert if you dare.

[Dax Shepard]

We are supported by skims. You know, I feel like at this point, everyone knows when they drop something new, it's kind of a big deal.

[Monica Padman]

It really is. And I've talked about this before, but my biggest thing with underwear is always comfort versus actually feeling cute. It's very hard to get both. You usually don't.

[Dax Shepard]

Right. It's a trade off.

[Monica Padman]

You're either comfortable and not really thrilled, or you look good and you're counting down the minutes till you can just take that piece baby off. But Skim solved that. Their new Everyday Cotton collection is the perfect balance.

[Dax Shepard]

So what is it about the line that you really love? What are you actually reaching for the most?

[Monica Padman]

Okay, so in the Everyday Cotton collection, I really like the Everyday Cotton bra. It is very comfortable, but very sleek and durable too. It is not like some bras. You throw them in the wash, say goodbye, they're disintegrating, they'll never be the same. Yes, this is not like that. Skims has nailed the products. They're just great.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, look, if it's comfortable and it fits well and you don't have to think about it, that's kind of the whole goal.

[Monica Padman]

Shop Everyday cotton and all my favorite bras and [e-mail] after you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you select podcast in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows.

[Dax Shepard]

We are supported by Nordic Naturals. Okay, here's something that surprises me. More than 80% of Americans don't get enough Omega 3s in their diet. And Omega 3 they're vital for your heart, brain, eyes, skin, joints, and the list goes on. That's where Nordic Naturals, the number one selling Omega 3 brand in the US comes in. Their Omega 3s are made from the purest ingredients, exceptionally fresh purified fish oil with a clean lemon taste. No fishy taste, no fishy burps. I take these every night. I do three right before bed. I've never had any kind of issue with a burp. They're pleasant to consume. Tens of thousands of studies link EPA and DHA to significant health benefits including heart, brain, immune, eye, mood, prenatal health, and more. And every Nordic Natural supplement is carefully crafted to meet or exceed the strictest international quality standards and third party tested to ensure exceptional purity and freshness. Use promo code DAX for 15 off your next [e-mail] and discover the power of Omega 3 with Nordic Naturals, the number one selling Omega 3 brand in the U.S. these statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease. This podcast is brought to you by Squarespace. I feel like spring always does this thing where you realize you've been thinking about something for a long time and suddenly it feels like, okay, maybe I actually do something with it.

[Monica Padman]

Totally. It's less pressure, but more like readiness.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, like you've been sitting on an idea or a project or even just a perspective you care about. And now you're like, maybe this deserves to exist somewhere outside of my own head.

[Monica Padman]

In May being Mental Health Awareness Month, there's already this broader conversation happening. People are more open, more curious, more

[Dax Shepard]

willing to engage is where something like Squarespace comes in. It makes that jump from idea to actual thing feel way less overwhelming. You can build a site that looks good, works well, and actually reflects what you're trying to put out there.

[Monica Padman]

And it's not just hypothetical. Wabi Wob literally used Squarespace to build our site.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. And Wabiwab is not trying to spend 40 hours figuring out web design. It just worked, which is kind of the point. So if you've been sitting on something and waiting for the right moment, this might, might be it. Head to squarespace.comdax for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use offer code DAX to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. We are supported by Helix. So, Monica, you've been sleeping on a Helix for what, a year now?

[Monica Padman]

A few years now, yes.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, my gosh.

[Monica Padman]

They sponsored a previous show and I got a Helix mattress and it's holding up.

[Dax Shepard]

It is.

[Monica Padman]

I still got it and I really like it because it's so personalized to me.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, they're so personalized. You pick side sleeper, back, slee sleeper, whether you run hot or not. That's why I love mine. I haven't had mine as long as you have, but mine is in tip top shape after about six months of hardware, let's be honest, I'm meditating in there, I'm journaling in there, I'm sleeping there. I'm virtually living in there.

[Monica Padman]

And there's actually science behind why we're sleeping better. 82% of those involved in a recent study saw an increase in their deep sleep cycle while sleeping on a Helix mattress.

[Dax Shepard]

They've got over 20 mattress models. So there's one design specifically for how you sleep. Plus free shipping, 120 night sleep trial and a limited lifetime warranty. Go to helixsleep.comarmchair for 27% off site wide. That's H E L I X sleep.com armchair for 27% off. Make sure you enter our show name at checkout so they know we sent you helixsleep.com armchair. Okay. In that period. Two, you do forgetting Sarah Marshall.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

2007, maybe April of 2007. And Kristen did tell me some funny stories about that today.

[Jack McBrayer]

What'd she say?

[Dax Shepard]

Well, one, I think everyone was introduced to your sunbathing routine.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, on Set?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, well, she said that they would be on the way to set and Jack would be by the pool right out of the gates.

[Monica Padman]

That's good.

[Jack McBrayer]

I mean, she's not wrong. So forgetting Sarah Marshall, my first time in Hawaii, I couldn't believe I was in a movie with all these, like, famous people. We were staying in the resort where we were filming Turtle Bay in Hawaii. I was like, this is crazy. So, yes, I was there for a month and I worked eight days.

[Dax Shepard]

I was gonna say the other thing she said is you somehow finagled them to be able to stay like two weeks after you arrived.

[Jack McBrayer]

No, it was just the schedule. I didn't like, abused anything. No, I don't even know the meaning of the word.

[Dax Shepard]

You called Conan and had them give you a full page outfit for your audition for 30 Rock. So I know you know how to call people.

[Jack McBrayer]

That's not finagling. That's asking for a favor.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, great. I think finagle is French for favor.

[Jack McBrayer]

That's wrong. That's a lie.

[Dax Shepard]

But you managed to be in the sun for 22 of 30 days.

[Jack McBrayer]

But now here's where it got tricky. They're like, well, Jack, your character is like a Mormon coming from Utah. You wouldn't be tan. I was like, that sounds like a makeup problem. So, no, I tried to slather on as much, but after a while you're like, bro, I'm getting tan.

[Dax Shepard]

When you're at poolside, are you just sitting or are you on your phone? Are you reading a book? What do you do with that? I can't sit for that much time.

[Jack McBrayer]

I can, and here's why. It is transcendental. I go somewhere else. It is meditative. I will be laying there and I'm not fully asleep, but I'm not fully awake. I can't lift my arms. I just go somewhere else and I just feel the warmth and I see the light from the outside and I'm just like, this is who I am.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

This is who I'm supposed to be.

[Monica Padman]

Your truest self.

[Jack McBrayer]

But then I'm just like, who was I in a past life?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, sun God.

[Jack McBrayer]

Or like a lizard.

[Dax Shepard]

Could be a lizard. Yeah. Someone that's got to get its core body temp up before it can do anything.

[Jack McBrayer]

Maybe I was a reptile. Maybe I was a solar panel.

[Monica Padman]

How long are you doing this? Like an hour.

[Jack McBrayer]

You gotta flip. So, yeah, you don't wanna do this for a full hour. I mean, you just flip, jump in the pool.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. But you're out there an hour, hour and a half.

[Jack McBrayer]

It's the best. And your hair just turns that bleachy chlorine green. Yeah, it's the best.

[Dax Shepard]

Our youngest daughter has green hair, and I'm so proud of her. That's such a badge of something. Commitment to swimming is what it is at the same time. And this is where I met you. So you and Kristin became friends on the. That movie. And then I start meeting you just right after that movie. And I want to say, you came over and you had just filmed this, but you filmed a Mariah Carey music video.

[Jack McBrayer]

What? My gosh.

[Dax Shepard]

That would have been 2008.

[Jack McBrayer]

February 2008. It was during the writer strike. I'm positive I was not the first person they called, but I was the first person to say yes. And I play Mariah Carey's love interest.

[Monica Padman]

What?

[Jack McBrayer]

In the hip video Touch My Body.

[Dax Shepard]

And isn't this the one that's like, don't want to see you up on YouTube. I'm always enamored when there's been certain words that could put in songs, and I'm really impressed that they pulled it off Toto's Africa. To get Kilimanjaro in a song is really, really hard.

[Jack McBrayer]

You're not wrong.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. And then another favorite of mine, the Year of the Cat. Great song.

[Jack McBrayer]

What's the word?

[Dax Shepard]

The Year of the cat. It's 70s song, but what's so the word? Just the title. The Year of the Cat. To sit down and write a rock ballad that's hugely successful, and it's called the Year of the Cat. That's like a feat. So to sing, like, on YouTube.

[Jack McBrayer]

YouTube.

[Dax Shepard]

That to me, sounds impossible. Like, if you approach me and say, dex, you have to write a hit song, and you have to say YouTube in the song four times. Four times while holding and do a runner, kind of do a run on it. That seems hard, and I'm impressed.

[Jack McBrayer]

Well, to. To be fair, that's when YouTube was becoming a thing.

[Dax Shepard]

I know that whole era, it needed addressing.

[Jack McBrayer]

It needed addressing. And she's the perfect spokesperson.

[Dax Shepard]

And she wants to do stuff, but she don't want to see that shit up on YouTube.

[Monica Padman]

Sure.

[Dax Shepard]

So she's also letting us know I have, like, a little bit of a naughty side. And you guys probably were very aligned on this.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Privacy, like, you gotta keep stuff off YouTube.

[Jack McBrayer]

I'm sorry. Setting healthy boundaries is okay. Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I think it's.

[Jack McBrayer]

We should all practice.

[Dax Shepard]

Recommended. But now, you did almost kill Mariah Carey during this video. Is that not true?

[Jack McBrayer]

I did kill Mariah Carey.

[Dax Shepard]

But what happened?

[Jack McBrayer]

You did injure her, so. Yes, I did. It was a terrible accident and she was fine and she was a very good sport about it. So that is for the record. We're supposed to be like frolicking in a field and I'm supposed to throw a Frisbee to her and bless her heart, she was singing as she was supposed to and just twirling around. So I threw the Frisbee when I was supposed to, but it left my hands. It doesn't have like a string that I can yank it back. And it just happened to like hit her in the face. In the face. I was mortified.

[Dax Shepard]

How soon into its flight trajectory did you start realizing, oh, fuck, I think that's going to hit her? And did you yell or were you afraid to ruin the video of her singing?

[Monica Padman]

This is a tough position.

[Jack McBrayer]

Is yelling worse than a Frisbee hitting her in the face?

[Dax Shepard]

I think it's better ruining the tape. I'd rather hear yelling than get hit in the face with a Frisbee is my pick.

[Jack McBrayer]

It was just an embarrassing and unfortunate thing.

[Dax Shepard]

But was it obvious to you it was going to hit her in its flight?

[Jack McBrayer]

Nothing is obvious. Obvious to me. And you know that. Everybody knows that.

[Monica Padman]

And it maybe happened so fast, it was a blur.

[Jack McBrayer]

And you have moments where you just feel your stomach just sink and you're like, I might throw up right now and I'm mortified.

[Monica Padman]

I'm not stitches or what?

[Jack McBrayer]

Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. She was such a good sport. I think she just needed some touch ups and stuff.

[Dax Shepard]

But you just need to cover the bruising a little bit.

[Monica Padman]

Why are you trying to make me

[Jack McBrayer]

look like an animal?

[Dax Shepard]

And did she explain to you why she wanted you to be her love interest in the video? Did that. That ever come up?

[Jack McBrayer]

It came up in conversation that she seemed to enjoy 30 Rock, but I really do suspect that they were trying to get bigger names and stuff. Okay. All right. I'm not lying.

[Dax Shepard]

I don't know if that's.

[Monica Padman]

She liked 30 Rock. She probably.

[Dax Shepard]

That's your shadow filling in a lot of unknowns. The shadow voice that tells you you're terrible and a piece of security.

[Jack McBrayer]

I don't have a shadow.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, you do. Every human has a shadow voice. You can lie about having one, but you have to. Yeah. There's some part of you, it's like, jack, you're so. Whatever it says, fill in the blank. Well, I would never because I can't think of a bad thing about You. But I bet your shadow has six or seven it thinks are bad about you.

[Jack McBrayer]

Is the shadow in the room with us now?

[Monica Padman]

Always.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, no, we bring the shadow everywhere with us.

[Jack McBrayer]

Y' all are so stupid. Do y' all get tired of this job?

[Monica Padman]

No, we love it.

[Jack McBrayer]

All you're doing is talking. I know I get tired of talking

[Dax Shepard]

about myself, but that's not the premise. You didn't say, hey, can I come over and talk about myself for an hour? I'm like, hey, can I learn about you for an hour? And everyone else would like to learn about you.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah, but we could also. Also do that over dinner, but no

[Monica Padman]

one else gets to hear it.

[Jack McBrayer]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Sounds good to me. Do you watch interviews? Do you enjoy interviews?

[Jack McBrayer]

Mine? No. No.

[Dax Shepard]

Other people, like, I love interviews. I used to listen to all the Stern interviews, and I had the streaming app so I could just listen to the interviews. I just love interviews. I loved Letterman interviewing people.

[Jack McBrayer]

No, I'd see the iconic ones about. Like Drew Carey.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. When Drew Carey showed his tits for Letterman's birth. Before Price is Right.

[Monica Padman]

Iconic moment.

[Jack McBrayer]

That was a mistake. Man, am I dumb.

[Monica Padman]

Does your shadow tell you you're dumb?

[Jack McBrayer]

No.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. This guy, I hope you don't think that. You know what?

[Dax Shepard]

He's very bright. He's got a very good vocabulary. As I watched other interviews with you.

[Jack McBrayer]

Oh, I did say Jermaine today.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, you did.

[Dax Shepard]

That brought me to smoking the Bandit. You ever watched Smokey and the Bandit as a kid? I'm sure I've been set in Georgia, but one of the officers says to Buford T. Justice over the radio. I don't see how that's germane to the situation. And Buford T. Justice says, the goddamn Germans got nothing to do with this. He thinks he said Germans.

[Jack McBrayer]

The context led me to believe that

[Dax Shepard]

you figured that out.

[Jack McBrayer]

I did.

[Dax Shepard]

Context clues.

[Monica Padman]

You're smart.

[Jack McBrayer]

She got me. You read me like a book. That's right, A popup.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. Now, after having that security for Seven years on 30 Rock, do you not crave that again, or would you love that?

[Jack McBrayer]

Yes. Having job security is wonderful. I don't need more money. I don't need more attention. I don't need any of that stuff. For me, I'm like, what could be fun? What might this feel like? What would it be like to work with this person or in this studio or in this location or with this script? That, to me, is more fun.

[Dax Shepard]

That's a very rare commodity to not feel like you need more. Where do you think that comes from?

[Jack McBrayer]

I think that's just baked in the DNA. But I do think, like, we didn't have a great deal of money growing up. We were not made to feel that we were less than or, you know, anything like that. But I do feel that whether it was intentional or just subconscious, but that you make the best of what you got, whether that's financial, whether that's whatever's going on in your family, you make the best of what you got. And so that was a very helpful lesson for me in terms of like, I don't need a lot. I can make the best of a small space or a small paycheck or

[Dax Shepard]

the 22 year old old Kia, Hyundai, Hyundai. Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. Both Korean. I didn't get it.

[Jack McBrayer]

Wow.

[Dax Shepard]

They're both Korean car.

[Jack McBrayer]

I don't see color.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, I do know that about you. You're famous for that.

[Monica Padman]

See Tan. We know that.

[Jack McBrayer]

I like her.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

He's like this one.

[Dax Shepard]

He sees a savage bass in the mirror every morning.

[Jack McBrayer]

Somebody told me that you can take a peptide.

[Monica Padman]

Yes.

[Jack McBrayer]

How did you know that?

[Monica Padman]

Because we talk about it a lot on here because we know people who've done it. Once sitting next to me, is it you?

[Dax Shepard]

I did it for just a little.

[Monica Padman]

You barely tried it, but you did try it.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, yeah, I loved it. I would love to be on it. But then a friend who got an illness, we found out, also loved that peptide. So then me and the other person that were on it got really paranoid about it based on nothing. Like, I'm sure there's a million reasons this person got sick.

[Monica Padman]

It also does weird stuff like your freckles got darker.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, yeah, yeah. On my forehead. That was one version of. There's two versions of it. Then I did the second version and it didn't have those issues. But here was my point, because we debated it. I was like, I like how I look tan better.

[Jack McBrayer]

Everybody looks better with color.

[Dax Shepard]

Absolutely. And if I have an option to do one that might up my rate of carcinoma versus one that doesn't, why wouldn't I choose this one? It seems crazy. I don't understand what the moral conundrum is about using a peptide versus the sun.

[Jack McBrayer]

I mean, I get it. For me, it's like, I'm not going to be the first person to buy the new iPhone. I'm like, y' all go first.

[Dax Shepard]

Yes.

[Jack McBrayer]

Y' all work out the bugs, then come back.

[Monica Padman]

I had some ethical issues with it as a brown person.

[Jack McBrayer]

Oh, tell me more.

[Monica Padman]

I was like, as a group Darker skinned people are more marginalized. And then you're just picking the piece you like about it and getting to have that piece and it just doesn't feel fair.

[Jack McBrayer]

I see.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, it was a big.

[Monica Padman]

It was a big debate for us.

[Jack McBrayer]

Are there peptides that change your skin

[Monica Padman]

color in different ways, like make it lighter? Well, there's skin bleaching and stuff, which a lot of people have done. Some Indian people have done skin bleaching to look lighter because you're considered prettier there at times.

[Jack McBrayer]

Is that an external thing?

[Dax Shepard]

Well, like the movie stars there are generally quite light skinned.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. And there's like the paper bag test. Like if you're lighter than a paper bag. Colorism is a real thing for people of color. So I think this gets a little triggering when people are like, oh, I'm just going to like take this peptide and be dark now.

[Dax Shepard]

But my point was you don't mind when they get sun tanned. Like, no one's mad if a white person gets suntan because that's natural. So you're really drawing this. What I think is a little bit arbitrary line, like, do you get it naturally or do you get it from a peptide? And that somehow changes it.

[Jack McBrayer]

But also, like, this is information that I didn't know and that's helpful to understand.

[Dax Shepard]

It all started because this woman identifies as black, which is clearly a problem. A white German lady. No, no. I was pointing to the tv. We put a picture of her up on the tv.

[Jack McBrayer]

She's like this woman.

[Monica Padman]

That's the headline.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. She's Irish, by the way.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, yeah. All to say I'm white.

[Dax Shepard]

Yes. She identifies as black. Like saying, I identify as a woman.

[Monica Padman]

Right.

[Dax Shepard]

Like, that's.

[Monica Padman]

No. And then she took this peptide.

[Dax Shepard]

She had a lot of body modifications. And then she took an elephant's dose of this peptide and she moved to Africa. Oh. So I think that's what kicked it off. Understandably, that context puts it triggering on a path where that reaction is justified.

[Jack McBrayer]

I understand.

[Dax Shepard]

Rob, maybe you can pull that up at some point just for Jack's amusement, because it's really not amusement.

[Jack McBrayer]

We don't have to do this. And I really didn't realize the path.

[Dax Shepard]

You'll be amused that a human has chosen this path on planet Earth and it's okay to be amused by that. And if we pretend that that's not amusing, I don't know where we're at.

[Monica Padman]

I also don't care anymore. For a minute, I felt pretty strongly about that peptide and feeling like, oh, I Don't know if that's good because of this. And now I'm like, whatever. I guess just do whatever you want.

[Dax Shepard]

Everyone, try to look as hot as you can. That's all we're all trying to do is look as hot as we can. Are you, Jack? I am.

[Jack McBrayer]

Look at my hair.

[Dax Shepard]

I think you look wonderful. Kempt, Fisher Price hair.

[Jack McBrayer]

No, it's like Lego.

[Dax Shepard]

Lego? Yeah. I'm having like a Lego snap on hair.

[Jack McBrayer]

You make the best of what you

[Dax Shepard]

got, what you've carved out. Post 30 Rock is a pretty insane voiceover career. Yes. Which is kind of for people who aren't hip to it. It's about as good as it gets, in a sense, because the money's great, the time commitment's very low, and you can maintain some anonymity to some degree.

[Jack McBrayer]

It's the best. Now, I have been told, and I hope I'm not getting my information wrong, because many of the characters that I voice do sound like this. I believe the term that was explained to me was that this would be a signature voice as opposed to a more character voice. Like many of the actors on the Simpsons can do, like, you know, 12, 14 different characters. Different characters. I cannot. So pretty much every character that I voice is going to sound like this. Yeah. Which I'm okay with.

[Dax Shepard]

Yes.

[Monica Padman]

That makes it easier.

[Jack McBrayer]

I'm not a good actor.

[Dax Shepard]

But you've been in Wreck It Ralph and the sequel. Like, big stuff. Disney shows that ran for an eternity.

[Jack McBrayer]

I know, I know. I can't believe it. What are you doing?

[Dax Shepard]

He just

[Jack McBrayer]

so.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah, we're almost there. Don't worry.

[Jack McBrayer]

Almost there. Commercial break.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

So that was the before and after of her. Oh, we don't know how she did her hair. What Peptide. That is.

[Monica Padman]

But the hair more like a wig situation.

[Dax Shepard]

But it's clearly not with that widow's peak. Unless they do a lace front with that much extra hair up front. But you can see where this would kick off the kind of conversation that Monica might have some issues with Peptide use. That's understandable. Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

I'm learning a lot today.

[Monica Padman]

We're here to teach.

[Jack McBrayer]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Let's talk about Zillow Gone Wild. Happy, happy birthday to Jack. Were you following the Instagram account before you got approached for this thing? Because I was.

[Jack McBrayer]

Oh, okay.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm a first in Zillow Gone Wild. Instagram.

[Jack McBrayer]

Excellent. So I'm not on social media, but I know that during the pandemic, this became a very popular Instagram page. And it's just actual listings on Zillow. That stand out?

[Dax Shepard]

Yes.

[Jack McBrayer]

Crazy listings on Zillow.

[Dax Shepard]

They're gone wild. It's in Gone wild. We'll get to this. This wine. You got to kind of. You don't want to be mean to anyone. And also, let's call it like it is. Some of these are crazy, fella. Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

I mean, like, by season three, I've realized, like, okay, my baseline is, does it have a toilet? That's where we are.

[Dax Shepard]

That's what you're hoping for.

[Jack McBrayer]

But it's been so fun. And what I do enjoy about this show, I get to do the TV version of what that Instagram page is.

[Dax Shepard]

Right. So the Instagram page is, like scouring all the Zillow listings around the country, and it's gathering the most unique ones. And when anyone would look at them, if you don't follow this pa, you go, how on earth are they going to sell this? Someone has committed their entire house to raccoons and raccoon stripe everywhere. You name it. People have done.

[Jack McBrayer]

It's been done.

[Dax Shepard]

When did you get approached in this?

[Jack McBrayer]

This would have been in March 11th. Well, it was June of 2023.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, my God. It's weird, right?

[Jack McBrayer]

It is weird, but it helps me keep things organized. So here comes the dementia. I was in the ground links.

[Dax Shepard]

Do you like looking at houses? Is that.

[Jack McBrayer]

I do, yeah. Now I live in my dream house, but when I'm strolling around the neighborhood and I see an open house, I'm going in that open house. Oh, I love it. And I think that's just a very human thing. I mean, it's a genuine curiosity. Like, oh, what are they doing? What is this? Like, what's their view? So they approached me about the show, did it, had a blast. You know, you're going in blind. I was like, am I going to be good at this? This is my first time doing unscripted.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

I was like, am I going to be interesting? Can I keep a conversation afloat? It was very important to me, and I made this very clear with the producers. I don't want to be snarky. I don't want to be Cynth. I don't want to embarrass these people. I don't want this to be an exercise in humiliation. I want this to be celebratory, and I want this to be exploratory and really lean into the curiosity, the human curiosity we all have about, like, what other people are doing on top of the fact that these houses are crazy.

[Dax Shepard]

Yes, yes, yes, yes. BONKERS so you're 100% right to have that ethos going in or that principle. And I agree it should not be making fun of people. But also often you are standing in places where like, the only thing one could say is like, this is nuts. I don't know. Even when you go with that intention.

[Monica Padman]

Well, we have that like on Armchair Anonymous. Same thing where it's like, we're not here to make fun of people. If you go in with the idea that you're not here to make fun of people, you do see the best.

[Dax Shepard]

That's true. But his is more extreme. Like you need to see the places he's standing in and you have to recognize, like, here's an example. And it wasn't even the owners of the house. They had bought it from someone else.

[Jack McBrayer]

Sure.

[Dax Shepard]

But he's in a house. And the thing that makes it qualify for gone wild is the previous owner was obsessed with storage. And so you walk into the kitchen, you have your normal refrigerator, high cabinets, but then you have two more rows of cabinets above that going up into what had to be like 15ft up the ceiling. And it looks a little like it gives you vertigo a little bit to see that many cupboard doors. And then it just unfolds as getting crazier and crazier. And there's a moment where they walk into to this, it's 80ft by 40ft. So it's about a 4,000 square foot room. That is a big cavernous room in floor to ceiling and shelves. I was thinking to Kristen, we were watching it last night and I'm like, I'm too distracted by needing to know what the mental illness was of the person who built it. Like, my explanation was, you know, just like there are alcoholics that are low functioning or high functioning. To me, that house was like, well, this is a super high functioning hoarder. They had the money and the wherewithal to still hoard, but do it in a way that would be organized. And it's madness.

[Jack McBrayer]

That was a crazy house. But again, like, how can I spin that? I think you are probably correct. It was someone who might have had issues of holding on to things, but had the wherewithal to keep it organized. But then it also begs the question, were those shelves ever filled?

[Dax Shepard]

How did they clean out this house when it originally changed hands?

[Jack McBrayer]

But yeah, no, you are correct. And so what is crazy? They don't let me even do any homework of like what the house is about to be. Because I want to catch my reaction genuine. And I'm like, well, I bet you anything I'm going to say, wow, this is scary.

[Dax Shepard]

Like, that room, weirdly was a little bit scary.

[Jack McBrayer]

That one was unnerving because, you know, I had seen the scope of the house from the outside, but I don't know what I'm about to see inside. And it was like a high school gym of shelves. Wow.

[Dax Shepard]

It was so big that they were ultimately going to cut it in half so that he could have a four car garage on one side with his cars inside and she could have another workspace and whatever. And there was still going to be plenty of room. It's the size of my barn, Monica in Nashville, but with shelves.

[Monica Padman]

So you're interviewing the people who. Not in this case, but normally the people who live there or like you're

[Dax Shepard]

walking around probably built it.

[Jack McBrayer]

A lot of times it is the people who built it and made these design choices and sometimes it is the people who bought it because of those design choices. Either way, it is. I get to like spend several hours with the person. We're taking the tour and, you know, a great deal of it is on camera, but some of it is off camera and you really get the dirt. And everybody has been a joy. They're opening up their homes to us. Yes, that's a big deal.

[Dax Shepard]

It's vulnerable. You're saying, go ahead and judge me, basically.

[Jack McBrayer]

And especially in season one, they didn't know what they were saying yes to. So we got lucky with that. We were able to, like, set the tone. And I feel that that has made it easier in subsequent seasons to, you know, have that proof of concept, even though just like, I'm not here to make fun. Show us what you got.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. And another one in the first season was this bunker. So I personally. You can't take this swing. This show works on so many levels. First of all, you're the greatest host. You're so fucking cheery and likable.

[Jack McBrayer]

House guest.

[Dax Shepard]

You're an incredible one.

[Monica Padman]

The chips, the ruffles.

[Jack McBrayer]

You'll receive a thank you note.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yes, you will.

[Dax Shepard]

And a bill for Christmas.

[Monica Padman]

I thought you call me a bitch in it.

[Jack McBrayer]

August 24th, right around that corner.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. So it works on a lot of levels. A, it's just so fascinating to see people's houses. And all the houses are completely bizarre. You're a phenomenal host. But the part for me, the third gear and juiciest of it is, and you already witnessed it, like, I love being armchair psychologist. And so I'm watching the one with the bunker and this boy bought a bunker, a missile silo, an abandoned missile

[Jack McBrayer]

silo that goes seven stories into the ground. It's all underground.

[Dax Shepard]

It's all underground.

[Jack McBrayer]

There's a door above ground and it's all underground.

[Dax Shepard]

And you walk down 50ft of sand steps, and then you're in this rusted out cavern.

[Monica Padman]

Now, mind you, this is a horror movie.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. He painted the walls and he put some stuff up, and then he takes Jack over to where the missile used to sit, and it has just taken on 50ft of water.

[Jack McBrayer]

There's just standing water, groundwater seeping in. Not his fault.

[Dax Shepard]

Not his fault. No, no. What are you going to do? And also, what are you going to do?

[Jack McBrayer]

Put a raft in that?

[Dax Shepard]

He put a raft in it.

[Monica Padman]

No, he really did.

[Jack McBrayer]

It was huge. I mean, a missile sat down there.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, God, you can't imagine how stressful it is to even just look at the environment. I can't imagine what it was like to be in that subterranean damp. Rusty.

[Jack McBrayer]

All right. May I?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

Our homeowner Andrew, was a delight. Very sweet boy, you know, good old boy. Did some hunting and fishing and stuff and treated himself to his own man cave, which happened to be an abandoned missile silo. Was it creepy? Yep.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

But when you have someone like him leading the tour and stuff, it did answer some questions. Would I have spent a great deal of time down there? No.

[Monica Padman]

No, thank you. No, I don't want to go there.

[Dax Shepard]

But the psychology I was enjoying. And I said to Kristen, because he's giving his interview and he's like, you know, how many people can say they've owned a missile silo? And I'm like, yeah, that's the only value to the place is to say you owned it. Because there's nothing pleasurable about being down there. No one would ever want it. It's for sale. Someone.

[Monica Padman]

Mother.

[Dax Shepard]

Boy, no woman's ever gonna buy that place.

[Jack McBrayer]

You're not wrong.

[Dax Shepard]

There's something about boys that are like, yeah, I have this thing nobody has. I'll tell people at school, it's so cute and sweet.

[Jack McBrayer]

That was sweet. And I will say this, and I'll be delicate, I suspect, and I haven't followed up to see if it's still on the market or what. But someone who perhaps is more concerned with long term safety.

[Dax Shepard]

Prepping. Yeah, prepping Your words.

[Jack McBrayer]

Might consider. Consider a space like that.

[Dax Shepard]

Yes.

[Monica Padman]

Safety is really the through line, though, because that's what everyone is looking for in their house. So the person with all the shelves, that's also about safety.

[Jack McBrayer]

I agree. I've learned a great deal about how people define home. It's been really wonderful seeing how people define that. For me, it was just like, four walls and a roof and peace and quiet. That's not the case for everybody, but this season.

[Dax Shepard]

What are you doing? I know. You're piling up with David Bromstad.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah. So he's like a legit HGTV person.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. He has a huge show. My lottery dream home.

[Jack McBrayer]

Correct. And so the thing is, like, he knows what he's talking about. I don't know what I'm talking about.

[Dax Shepard]

Right, Right.

[Jack McBrayer]

Shadow.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, that's right. You got.

[Jack McBrayer]

But when it comes to houses. I know there are words I'm supposed to know, like, oh, Wayne Scotting.

[Dax Shepard]

Your most genuine self always comes out when you see a swimming pool. Like, when you're at the pink house, you're like, oh, my God, this swing. Like, you almost exploded out of your body.

[Jack McBrayer]

Gosh. Like, pools are the best.

[Monica Padman]

Are you a good swimmer?

[Jack McBrayer]

I mean, I float okay. Well, yeah, I never do.

[Dax Shepard]

All that tells how many Bud Lights he's got in him.

[Jack McBrayer]

I love Bud lights. I do love a pool. I do love a pool. What caused that, I wonder?

[Monica Padman]

The water. Do you like the ocean?

[Jack McBrayer]

I do, but I like the controlled environment of a pool.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Very contained. So this season, you go 26ft under. Las Vegas. Yes. What was that one?

[Jack McBrayer]

It's a bunker. It's not just a house. It's got a yard, a fountain, an event space. You feel like you're outdoors. Like they painted the sky. They've got lights. It is weird. It messes up with your circadian rhythm. That's the word.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Did you watch Fallout by chance? You watched?

[Jack McBrayer]

No, but I know which one you're talking about.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, with the no nos, but they're all in vaults underground, so it makes me think it would be. They're living the real life in paradise.

[Jack McBrayer]

Spoiler alert.

[Monica Padman]

Ye haven't seen it yet.

[Dax Shepard]

You're probably not going to.

[Monica Padman]

Yep. I just ruined it.

[Jack McBrayer]

Season three, we saw 41 houses. So, like, I've been traveling a great deal. My carbon footprint is not great.

[Dax Shepard]

It's not great, but. How's your airline status? So good.

[Jack McBrayer]

If I knew what those meant. It just gives you all these numbers, and I'm like, I don't know what this means. Okay.

[Monica Padman]

You're at the top.

[Dax Shepard]

You're probably diamond or platinum. Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

Got me. And then you got the hotel doing the same thing. I was like, I don't know what this means.

[Dax Shepard]

Do you cash any of these in for your own luck?

[Jack McBrayer]

I don't know how.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, okay, okay.

[Jack McBrayer]

I don't know what this stuff means.

[Dax Shepard]

Have you ever gone to see Alexander in Sweden?

[Jack McBrayer]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

You have?

[Jack McBrayer]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

What's that?

[Jack McBrayer]

Like?

[Dax Shepard]

How are you not in love with him? I would be in love with him.

[Jack McBrayer]

We all are. When you meet the boy, like, yeah.

[Monica Padman]

So lovable.

[Jack McBrayer]

I'm the godfather of his kids.

[Monica Padman]

He was such a delight. We were surprised.

[Dax Shepard]

We were completely taken by surprise.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And he's so gorgeous. I could just look at him.

[Monica Padman]

He's a beautiful man.

[Jack McBrayer]

He's one of those people where you meet and you're just like, oh, you're my guy.

[Dax Shepard]

What do you do when you're into. You guys go out to bars at night and prom?

[Jack McBrayer]

I mean, no. He cooks at home. He can be quite a homebody.

[Dax Shepard]

It's domestic.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yes, it's domestic. But, like, it is also funny because half the time we're acting like an old married couple. Half the time we're acting like middle school boys in class kind of thing. You know, just giggle. And he loves comedy. And so I'm like, America's plus one. But I'll go with him to the SAG Awards or the Emmys or whatever.

[Dax Shepard]

You joined him at SNL this year when he hosted.

[Jack McBrayer]

I joined him at SNL this year when he meets the cast of. Of Schitt's Creek. I'm like, oh, let's go say hey. Let's go say hey. He's like, okay. So he gets nervous. I'm like, em was the best.

[Monica Padman]

You guys are such a good duo.

[Jack McBrayer]

He's a gem.

[Dax Shepard]

And then you were on Murderbots with Alex.

[Jack McBrayer]

That was so fun. It is one of those things. You gotta be best friends with people who just give you jobs.

[Monica Padman]

That's a really good rule of thumb.

[Dax Shepard]

I want to act in something with him. Yeah, that's fun.

[Jack McBrayer]

It is one of those things where I don't know who we were to each other in a past life, but we found each other.

[Dax Shepard]

Love it. Okay, well, the new season of Zillow Gone Wild.

[Monica Padman]

Yay.

[Dax Shepard]

Is out May 1 on HGTV. I also was watching old seasons on HBO Max.

[Jack McBrayer]

Correct Streams.

[Dax Shepard]

Feel free to go over to HBO Max. Your birthday is today.

[Jack McBrayer]

No.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, my God. That would have.

[Dax Shepard]

What's the date today?

[Jack McBrayer]

April 29th.

[Monica Padman]

When's your birthday?

[Jack McBrayer]

May 27th.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, May. I wrote down 4, 4 27. It's 3 27.

[Jack McBrayer]

If it were 427 and it's 429 today.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, my God. Today's 5. What is today? 5 29.

[Jack McBrayer]

Are you okay?

[Monica Padman]

It's all that nicotine.

[Jack McBrayer]

Shooting too many blanks.

[Monica Padman]

That's right.

[Jack McBrayer]

Oh, I made it bad.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm really confused.

[Monica Padman]

We finally got something.

[Jack McBrayer]

Not 4:29.

[Dax Shepard]

Today's 4:29.

[Monica Padman]

His birthday's 5:27.

[Dax Shepard]

Five. No, it's three.

[Monica Padman]

No, May.

[Jack McBrayer]

May.

[Monica Padman]

Jesus Christ.

[Dax Shepard]

Sor. Lincoln's birthday. Lincoln's birthday is March 27th. I don't know why I'm like.

[Monica Padman]

That's right.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm getting stuck on March 27th. Okay.

[Jack McBrayer]

I have three birthdays.

[Dax Shepard]

So next month. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

[Jack McBrayer]

All right.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm gonna try to send you a very vile.

[Jack McBrayer]

You don't have to do that.

[Dax Shepard]

You don't enjoy receiving them, just dishing them out.

[Jack McBrayer]

Do whatever you want.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. I'm gonna warn you now. I'm gonna call you a pecker.

[Jack McBrayer]

No, I'm blocking you.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm gonna go. Happy birthday, you pecker, you. Jack the pecker.

[Jack McBrayer]

You're terrible.

[Dax Shepard]

I haven't used that word in 30 years.

[Jack McBrayer]

Good.

[Dax Shepard]

It used to mean something in the 80s. They regularly call people in the 80s and shows in movies. Peckers. That guy's a pecker.

[Monica Padman]

Well, it's gone out of a penis.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Just reminding everyone that's what it was.

[Jack McBrayer]

Spoiler alert.

[Monica Padman]

I'm all about the spoiler.

[Jack McBrayer]

Spoiler.

[Dax Shepard]

Jack McBr. I love you. Thanks for getting through this with us.

[Jack McBrayer]

This was a weird experience, but it was fun.

[Monica Padman]

Was it?

[Jack McBrayer]

It was fun.

[Monica Padman]

Good. We had.

[Jack McBrayer]

Got a weird job.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. Like it a blessing.

[Dax Shepard]

We want to keep it. I adore you. I can't wait. To your next party attendance and your next receipt. Your next invoice.

[Monica Padman]

Throw a party just so Jack can come.

[Dax Shepard]

I should. It's been too long. Or we just want to come lay by the pool.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. Great. Yes. Let's do that.

[Jack McBrayer]

That's easy.

[Dax Shepard]

Do Sauna.

[Jack McBrayer]

What does that mean?

[Dax Shepard]

Do you go in the sauna? Do you enjoy a sauna?

[Jack McBrayer]

Hot or with steam?

[Dax Shepard]

Hot. Dry.

[Jack McBrayer]

Oh, that's what I meant.

[Dax Shepard]

Alexander's never had you in a sauna and a Swedish sa.

[Jack McBrayer]

Just use the pool.

[Dax Shepard]

Yes, absolutely.

[Monica Padman]

The sauna is also nice.

[Dax Shepard]

It's very social. We like to get in the sauna together, Chitchat.

[Jack McBrayer]

How big is the sauna?

[Dax Shepard]

It's embarrassingly large.

[Jack McBrayer]

Is it big?

[Dax Shepard]

It's shamefully large. It's like your carbon footprint.

[Jack McBrayer]

Is it?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

I have a terrible carbon footprint.

[Dax Shepard]

I know you do. You just let that out of the bag.

[Jack McBrayer]

Well, it's not my fault.

[Dax Shepard]

It's HGTV. Check out the new season on May 1, which is five, which is the the month of your birth in 1973. Okay, I love you. Good luck, everyone. Watch Zillow Gone Wild. Stay tuned for the fact check so you can hear all the facts that were wrong. This episode is brought to you by Yellow.

[Monica Padman]

That's right. That is really right.

[Dax Shepard]

It's officially brought to you by Yellow. Monica, as you know, I have these little snacks between our recording sessions.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, you do.

[Dax Shepard]

It's always the same bar. I'm kind of addicted to it. And it's got half of my fiber in it.

[Monica Padman]

It really does sound like this is an ad now.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, but I'm not gonna say the name of it. So it's not an ab. Oh, I just love this bar. It's got half my daily allowance of fiber in it. So I need.

[Monica Padman]

I need that.

[Dax Shepard]

I eat two a day. I love them. They're such a treat for me at night when I get into bed.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, it's your dessert.

[Dax Shepard]

After I brush my teeth.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, after.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Which people hate.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, people won't like.

[Dax Shepard]

Then I'll remind them that brushing your teeth. More about the plaque being there for 24 hours and becoming tartar or vice versa. It's more of a time game. As long as you interrupt it. Anyways, that's neither here nor there. Last night, I was laying in bed having my snack.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

190 calories.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

And I thought, huh, I wonder how this would taste on a melted marshmallow between two graham crackers.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, a s'. More.

[Dax Shepard]

A s'. More. I want to try a s' more with my protein fiber bar this summer. I'm loosely scheduling it for July 4th weekend.

[Monica Padman]

Cool.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. So that's a new project I'm working on.

[Monica Padman]

That's fun.

[Dax Shepard]

I know. Sometimes we announce our new projects.

[Monica Padman]

I feel like you got inspired by an armchair anonymous. We recorded. Maybe you didn't even know that you did, but you did.

[Dax Shepard]

There's a camping one. And I asked the little boy if he was gonna make s' mores that night. And he said yes.

[Monica Padman]

Story about s'. Mores. Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And then I asked if he was gonna use a Reese's peanut butter cup.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

He said he had done that. He was a pro.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, he was.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

He paid the price.

[Monica Padman]

But he probably hasn't tried this.

[Dax Shepard]

I don't know that anyone has. I bet be the first person in history that tries this protein bar as a s' more topping.

[Monica Padman]

I think that could be true. I'm skeptical.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

But I'm hopeful for you.

[Dax Shepard]

It's very rare. You know, I am obsessed with anytime you can do anything on planet Earth that someone hasn't done. 8 billion. We're at 8 billion, by the way.

[Jack McBrayer]

Now.

[Monica Padman]

I think that's a good ding, ding, ding for a fact actually coming up. Oh, it is coming up. Easter egg.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. Forthcoming fact. But yep. Lincoln had to correct me. I was like seven and a half billion. That's not it anymore. Or we're well above eight billion now.

[Monica Padman]

Are you worried about what? The heat of the protein powder in the bar. There's protein in there, right? It's a protein bar, right?

[Dax Shepard]

It is. Which is unconventional conventional for me because I don't prefer. Is vegetable protein.

[Monica Padman]

Plant based.

[Dax Shepard]

Plant based protein. So I do think it'll melt better than like say, whey protein. That's what you're worried about?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, I just feel like I'm a little nervous about the consistent. What's going to happen consistency wise, when there's protein in there.

[Dax Shepard]

Maybe I'll microwave one tonight to see what happens when it gets hot.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

You're right. It might turn hard, but I think it's going to get. It's going to turn pretty runny and yummy. You're pessimistic.

[Monica Padman]

Report back on the next fact check.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, no, it's not going to happen to July. Oh, I can microwave.

[Monica Padman]

Microwave. Yeah. Let's do some experimentation.

[Jack McBrayer]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

Sometimes you do start projects and then you don't follow up. Like your, your cashmere that you're making out of your back hair.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm still, I'm still contributing to the stockpile.

[Monica Padman]

I just haven't heard lately.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. I just haven't given an update. But there's a growing bag in my bath.

[Monica Padman]

How much do we have these days?

[Dax Shepard]

Probably enough for like a. A pinky sock.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, all right.

[Dax Shepard]

That might be maybe half a pinky size.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. So like thimble.

[Dax Shepard]

I don't know how much it's. When it's. Once it's spun right. You got a spin wool. I think it goes down in size quite a bit.

[Monica Padman]

It does, it does.

[Dax Shepard]

So I don't. I don't really know.

[Monica Padman]

It's pretty thin hair we're working with.

[Dax Shepard]

Very. That's its appeal. It's baby soft because it's off of my baby's legs and your. Your in my back.

[Monica Padman]

The daddy's back.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. None of my other hair would qualify because the rest of it's coarse. I was just getting Complaints about it, actually, from Delta about the beard's not soft unless it's a certain length.

[Monica Padman]

Oh.

[Dax Shepard]

And then my gray hair on the side's kind of scraggly. It's not as soft as the rest of it.

[Monica Padman]

Well, you could dye it and it'll get soft.

[Dax Shepard]

I just reached out to Amy to see if she has a window to give me highlights now that my hair is getting longer. I like to have highlights.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, wow.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

You know that.

[Monica Padman]

I do. I do know that.

[Dax Shepard]

Highlights are fun. Have you ever considered any kind of layers for your hair for different dimensions? No, no. When you got perfect hair, you don't fuck with it.

[Monica Padman]

It's not that I have perfect hair.

[Dax Shepard]

It's that you have perfect hair.

[Monica Padman]

Well, that's very kind. Thank you. But it's that I. Oh, how do I say it?

[Dax Shepard]

Well, you're afraid you're going to offend somebody somehow.

[Monica Padman]

So if you're white and you are, you're a brunette, you dye your hair blonde. Or vice versa in the case of Dakota Johnson. Vice versa.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. Was that a film she was in or.

[Monica Padman]

No, no, no. She just went blonde to brown.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, great.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. And it still looks natural. You could have been born with that hair color right. Now, if you have brown skin like me and black hair like me, I could not have been born with blonde highlights or blonde hair.

[Dax Shepard]

I got you.

[Monica Padman]

I could not have. So it is just so obvious, unnatural that it's unnatural that it's. That it is. Now, that's fine.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Because look at me. Everyone knows I have gray hair on my sides. And next week I'm not going to have gray hair on my sides. They'll know it's all fake.

[Monica Padman]

Well, that's not about it. It's more about just, like, the brain knows that. Well, by the way, if my hair goes gray, I'm dying it black.

[Dax Shepard]

There we go.

[Monica Padman]

Like, it's not that I'm against, but my. I'm dying it my natural hair color.

[Dax Shepard]

Right.

[Monica Padman]

And that will appeal, appear like my natural hair color. Now, if I do a big. If I dye my hair blonde, it's gonna be pretty clear that I dyed it.

[Dax Shepard]

But that might be okay.

[Monica Padman]

That's fine for whoever wants to do that. But I, like, George has got.

[Dax Shepard]

You know, George has these beautiful ringlets. Penne.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And his hair is very dark. I was noticing when I was FaceTiming the other day. He clearly has, like, a layer of blonde highlights. It looks really fun and radiant.

[Jack McBrayer]

Great.

[Dax Shepard]

Playful, I'm sure. And it's clearly fake. As hell. There's no way.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. He doesn't care about that.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

And a lot of people don't. A lot of people don't. And that's great. Like, do whatever you want. I'm just. I just mean for me, for your brand. I don't think I feel comfortable with, like, having something very obviously.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. Kind of like the shave sides.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. Not. It's not me.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. You're not taking big swings with your hair.

[Monica Padman]

I've never take.

[Dax Shepard]

What do you think your biggest swings are? I. I would say with your fashion,

[Monica Padman]

probably, but even then, I'm not taking huge swings. I don't take very many. I mean. No, I do. My big swings are in my ability to confront people.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. That's your. Where you reserve all your.

[Monica Padman]

Those are where I take bigger swings than most people in. I'm not afraid to have a hard conversation with someone who other people might be afraid to.

[Dax Shepard]

Right. You're looking at me super intensely.

[Monica Padman]

I'm just. I do have hard conversations. Conversations with you that I do think a lot of people would avoid. And that's. That's where I keep it. I keep it in my hair.

[Dax Shepard]

I got you.

[Monica Padman]

So I'm not willing to. Well, and one time I got my hair cut when I was really little. Well, my mom did it, and it was a mushroom cut, and it looked horrible.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Mushrooms cut. Very few people can pull off them.

[Monica Padman]

She didn't mean to make it a mushroom cut, but that's how it turned out.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

And so I just cannot, you know.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, you're kind of reacting to a little bit of hair trauma.

[Monica Padman]

A little, I guess. A little. And I do think if you can have long hair, I mean, not for everyone, because it's hard to maintain, I guess, like, do it.

[Dax Shepard]

You did just bring up a grievance. I have.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, let's hear it.

[Dax Shepard]

And it's the least sympathetic grievance I could have.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

So I'm acknowledging that no one's gonna feel bad for me.

[Monica Padman]

All right.

[Dax Shepard]

But I am frustrated. The thing. So the thing you just said, like, you're not afraid to confront me, but other people are.

[Monica Padman]

It's like, you're not afraid to confront me, and other people might be as well. It's both ways.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Aside from that, I've had numerous examples, Ana being one of them. Right. Where Ana said, like, oh, no, I thought. I was afraid you're gonna be mad.

[Monica Padman]

She's afraid of you. Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. And I'm like. I'm like, ana, I mean, really, if we were around every tape ever. I've been nothing but, like, just so sweet to Ana.

[Monica Padman]

I know it's not about that.

[Dax Shepard]

And I was just talking to Delt about this because. Yeah. This intimidation factor that I don't feel like I deserve or earned. Yeah. Yeah. Like, that people would be afraid of me. I'm like, that's not.

[Monica Padman]

It's a. This is a slippery conversation.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, okay.

[Monica Padman]

Is it? I want. I mean, I'm happy to have it. I'm happy to have it, but I don't want us to get in a fight, and I'm a little worried.

[Dax Shepard]

Let's leave you and I out of it. Let's.

[Monica Padman]

I don't think we can.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, I think we can, because I.

[Monica Padman]

Not.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm not addressing you and I. I'm addressing other people that are afraid of me.

[Monica Padman]

I know, but the people that are afraid of you.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Sometime I think I've seen instances of you being a little. Okay. I don't know how to. It's not. Well, scary, I guess, to them. To them. Right. But that.

[Dax Shepard]

I don't know if Anna has.

[Monica Padman]

I mean, if we're just all in conversation and me and you are, like, doing a thing that's intimidating, that's like. I don't want that. I don't ever want to be on the receiving end of that. I think is. Is the way some people feel, if they've seen it or been around it or. Also, you just. You are someone who speaks their mind, as am I, and is not afraid to, like, enter a tricky conversation, enter a fray. And what I've had to learn is a lot of people don't want to do that.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, sure.

[Monica Padman]

But that used to be hard for

[Dax Shepard]

me to accept that they didn't want to do it.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

You thought they did want to do it. They were just afraid to.

[Monica Padman]

Well, all of it. It's just like. It's like, oh, like, if you think this, why wouldn't you just say it?

[Jack McBrayer]

Uhhuh.

[Monica Padman]

And then I would get, like, annoyed at people not saying stuff when. And then, like. But I'm like. But then. Then I had to understand that not everyone wants to have conflict. Not everyone. In fact, most people don't.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, yeah.

[Monica Padman]

And so they avoid it, and that's fine, you know? And so I. Yeah, I think that's what it is.

[Dax Shepard]

I think being big is part of it, too. Because often I think when I was talking about. With Delta, it's like these little kids that come around. I mean, so friendly.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, are the little kids scared of you?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. I think in general, a lot of the friends are afraid of me, which is my doing. Like, I got tattoos and I got big, so I'm gonna take a lot of responsibility. But I'm just like, I'm so. I think I'm so friendly.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, you are. But sometimes that's intimidating to be friendly a little.

[Dax Shepard]

Because it's like, why is he so friendly?

[Monica Padman]

No, it's just like, oh, I have to talk now. Like, this person's engaging with me. So now I can't just, like, go sight unseen. Like, this person notices me.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah.

[Monica Padman]

And now I. I have to talk. And I'm a little kid, and I don't really know how to talk to adults. I remember. I don't. Maybe this has changed over time. I hope it has. But I used to be so intimidated by everyone's dad. Doesn't matter how big they were, what they looked like.

[Dax Shepard]

The role of dad.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, the role of dad was always intimidating.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Of course. I don't want anyone to be intimidated by me. I. I want everyone one to feel very loved by me and comfortable.

[Monica Padman]

And you also want people to understand that you aren't to be messed with or your family isn't to be messed with.

[Dax Shepard]

Baddies. I don't care if baddies are intimidated by me.

[Monica Padman]

No, but it's all part of your Persona. Your Persona is I will not be fucked with. Like, I'll be nice to you, but if you cross a line, like, I'm killing you to death, so killing you to death. Or if you say something about someone that I'm protective of, I'm killing you to death. So, like, you know, there's some, like, what's the line? What's the line I might accidentally step on?

[Jack McBrayer]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

I don't know if the kids know about that. The Delta's friends.

[Dax Shepard]

Maybe they just can. Intuitively.

[Monica Padman]

They can.

[Dax Shepard]

Intuitive Spidey senses.

[Monica Padman]

I wonder if it. I wonder if your tattoos.

[Dax Shepard]

Like, I'm just mostly. This is probably my grievance against Anna, where I'm like, sweet, sweet girl. I've been. I just so loving. I can't imagine having put more effort into being, like, loving.

[Monica Padman]

You're very kind to her.

[Dax Shepard]

The idea that she would be scared of me, that just hurts my feelings.

[Monica Padman]

I'm sorry it hurts your feelings. I am. I really am. I am. I don't want your feelings to be hurt. And I hope you can understand. Understand, Stan. Like, I can.

[Dax Shepard]

We got. We work through it.

[Monica Padman]

You're. You're a. You're a presence Dax, you're. You're. You're a presence.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, I guess I'm over it. Yeah. I just. You understand what I'm saying?

[Monica Padman]

I do. I.

[Dax Shepard]

The notion that someone would be afraid of me. Someone like Anna.

[Monica Padman]

But listen. Okay, first of all, I just hate that. Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

Two things, all right? One, you've never been mean to Anna, ever. She doesn't think that. She doesn't think, like, oh, Dax was mean to me or any. Like, I've never heard her say that.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

And then also, Anna is also not. You're putting her in a category of, like, she's like, such a big, sweet baby. Like, she's not.

[Dax Shepard]

No, I don't think she's a sweet baby. She does cry very easily. She cries a lot in that. That's hard for me when people. When girls cry. So I. Anytime girls cry, I'm. I'm like, I have no game plan anymore.

[Monica Padman]

Sure.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

So she does cry a lot.

[Monica Padman]

She's a Pisces.

[Dax Shepard]

I love it about her.

[Monica Padman]

I mean, she's a cancer. Oh, my God. She'd be so mad if she heard me say she's Pisces. But she's a cancer. And she does cry at the drop of a hat.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

But she's tough.

[Dax Shepard]

Like, oh, yeah, she'll be fine an hour later.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. And she's not crying about. Sometimes she's is crying about things that people say or do, but, like, you know, she can dish. She dishes it out.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. I don't think she's fragile. I don't think she's fragile at all.

[Monica Padman]

She's not fragile.

[Dax Shepard]

In fact, I think she's very robust.

[Monica Padman]

I will tell you. So she. She made a mistake once.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

For you two. You and Kristen.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, yeah. I already know what this is.

[Monica Padman]

You know what this is? She. She made a mistake. Mistake.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And it was financially a hefty mistake.

[Monica Padman]

It impacted you financially.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah.

[Monica Padman]

And she told me, you know, and so she's very stressed out about this. But then she said. Then you made a point to tell her to not ever stress out about your money. And that was very kind. She felt a little better.

[Dax Shepard]

I said, the best use of money that could ever be is that the people I love can be happy from it. And so the notion that someone would be upset because of missing money, that's the whole reason to have it. So I don't. I refuse to let you be upset about this, because I'm not mad. I would never get mad at someone I love. Over money.

[Monica Padman]

Well, yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

Uh.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh.

[Jack McBrayer]

What?

[Monica Padman]

I thought it was really sweet that you said that. And you. And you did. You did everything you could to make her feel totally better about that.

[Dax Shepard]

What are you smirking about?

[Monica Padman]

Nothing. I just. I don't know. Sometimes. Sometimes I'm jealous.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

Sometimes I'm jealous of people who have. Have Honestly, like a less. I don't want to say intimate, but kind of relationship with you. Like, I think. You know, I don't know.

[Dax Shepard]

You think? Yeah. If I worked with Anna every day for eight years and she blew a big chunk of money for armchair expert. Is that what you're saying? Kind of.

[Monica Padman]

Well, I just.

[Dax Shepard]

I would. I would address it.

[Monica Padman]

I don't think you always. And vice versa. Ding, ding, ding. For me to you in Dakota's hair. Dakota Johnson. Vice versa. I don't think we necessarily treat each other with the same level of sweetness and kindness that we treat other people.

[Dax Shepard]

Sure.

[Monica Padman]

That are less. Like I, I mean, for important to me. People who are less important to me. I. I can treat better.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, yeah. Which makes total sense. Like the less impact someone has on your life.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

The. The less concerned you are about their behavior because who cares? It's not going to affect you.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

But. Yeah. If you run a business with somebody.

[Monica Padman]

It's more than that. It's like. It's more than that. It's, you know, the history, the being there since the kids were three months old. You know, like the whole family element. It's deeper than that. Like it's. And I'm so happy about that. But I think it can come at a cost. But that's just like the way life is, I guess.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. I think if you cross this threshold, that's not full siblings, but it's almost sibling esque.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Like we're together way too much for me to ignore things.

[Monica Padman]

Or.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. And there's just like, okay, well, I've earned this. You know how I feel about you. Like, is what you think in your mind. Like my siblings.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Like I love my brother and my sister and I'm gonna be there for them till we're all dead.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And so I'll tell them things that are harsher for sure. Then I'll. You tell. Tell anyone else. Because it's implicit. The safety of the relationship.

[Monica Padman]

I know. And I think that's where there's sometimes a weird, like a extra hard layer for us or for all me and the family is like, there is that relationship, but there isn't the intrinsic safety. Like it's Implied safety. It's a feeling of safety. Safety. But it's not biological. It's not, you know, which biologically also people don't. That doesn't always happen.

[Dax Shepard]

But I think it all depends to like what your own personal experience in life was. So it's like Aaron, him being my mylogical brother would not make us closer nor would it make our relationship more permanent. Like it's just so permanent.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

We both know it and yeah, we talk to each other differently. It's what I love about it. Right. It's just like he knows I'm not judging him.

[Monica Padman]

Right.

[Dax Shepard]

And I'll just say whatever I observe and vice versa. Dakota Fanny.

[Monica Padman]

Oh my God. Johnson.

[Dax Shepard]

Johnson.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, it's a big vice versa episode.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Brought to you by yellow and vice versa. You look all of it like everything in life, it's all trade offs. So you take on more good and you take on more bad. You take on more, you know, closeness. I'm still to some degree seen Anna's preference presenting self.

[Monica Padman]

Right.

[Dax Shepard]

You know.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I don't see. I'm not with her 45 hours a week. So I don't really know Anna the way that her ex girlfriend knows her or Kristen knows her.

[Monica Padman]

Or me.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Or you.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And yeah. I just think all these predictable things happen when you get super close to somebody.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, that is true.

[Dax Shepard]

And you're like, well, we no longer have like an acquaintanceship or a loose friendship. We're now like we're coexisting. So if we're coexisting we have to like call out.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Things that.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, yeah, I know it. Yeah, it is, it's just trade offs. It's, it's, it's interesting. But yeah, you're very nice to her. All to say. And she shouldn't be. Your feelings shouldn't. But your feelings shouldn't be hurt because she's also like. He's also my boss to an extent. Kristen's her boss. But.

[Dax Shepard]

But I'm not. I make that really clear.

[Monica Padman]

Well, yeah, but also if you ask her to do something, she can't say no.

[Dax Shepard]

I don't ever ask her to do anything. Well, two or three times I've asked her to do something. I pay her on the side and I say like, you don't work for me.

[Monica Padman]

I know, I know, but it's just part. You know what I mean? Like it's a dynamic. Like if you, if you ask her to do.

[Dax Shepard]

I am her boss's husband.

[Monica Padman]

If you ask her to do something, it's Different. Different than if I ask her to do something. Yeah, it just is. And so there's gonna. That's just the way.

[Jack McBrayer]

I know.

[Monica Padman]

You know, again.

[Dax Shepard]

But again, the time that I, like, someone asked her to do something that shouldn't have asked her to do something, and I witnessed it and that person got a talking to.

[Monica Padman]

But.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, I guess you should be intimidated by me. Yeah, yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Just because, like.

[Dax Shepard]

But it was a family member, so

[Monica Padman]

I didn't get a talking to. No one wants to get a talking to from dad. That's just the way it goes.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

Stay tuned for more Armchair Expert, if you dare.

[Dax Shepard]

This episode is brought to you by ServiceNow. Look, I have my dream job. I get to talk to folks I admire like crazy and ask them virtually any question that I want to. I can't imagine a better way to spend my time. But even dream jobs have some so dreamy parts. The stuff that gets in the way of the actual work. Now, that's where ServiceNow's AI specialists come in. They don't just tell you what you should do about your busy work. They actually do it. Start to finish, cases closed, requests handled, no extra work for you. So you and your team can focus on what matters most, which for me is are they obsessed with male bodies on the same level as I am?

[Monica Padman]

They never are.

[Dax Shepard]

To learn how to put AI to work for people, visit service now.com.

[Monica Padman]

Speaking of family.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

My brother proposed to his girlfriend.

[Dax Shepard]

He did?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Did he make a big thing of it?

[Monica Padman]

He did.

[Dax Shepard]

He did.

[Monica Padman]

He did. He took her to this nice restaurant and then he, like, had a whole thing. Like these flowers was a whole to do.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, wow.

[Monica Padman]

He got down on one knee and he did it up. And they're very happy.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, good.

[Jack McBrayer]

She said yes.

[Monica Padman]

She said yes.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. Stressful.

[Jack McBrayer]

She.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm glad he didn't do it at a sporting event.

[Monica Padman]

No, he wouldn't do that.

[Dax Shepard]

I guess if you've already asked the woman, would you say yes and she said yes, then you can do it at a sporting event. Oh, but I do not like when the woman's surprised. She has an entire audience waiting to see if she's going to say yes.

[Monica Padman]

That stresses me out.

[Dax Shepard]

That's a. That's not a funny. Fair assessment. You don't have a real answer. They have to.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. That's the pressure. I know. No. If anyone wants to propose me, do not. If you know me even a little bit. I hate audience participation. So if you ever. If you propose to me in a way that's in Public. I'm saying no.

[Jack McBrayer]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

That's just across the board, like, no.

[Monica Padman]

You don't even know me.

[Dax Shepard]

Matt Damon asked you in public.

[Monica Padman]

He doesn't know me. And what happened? Like, what happened with the. With his life, you know?

[Dax Shepard]

Well, he's. He's single in this scenario.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

She left him.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, good. Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah. He didn't. He wanted to stay with her forever.

[Monica Padman]

He's.

[Dax Shepard]

He's fine. He's. He's coming out of the smelling like roses. She's the bad guy.

[Monica Padman]

Cool.

[Dax Shepard]

And then he asks you at a hockey game, a Boston Bruins game. He wants you to see his Boston Bruins.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

And we're on the cam.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, you're on the cam at Damon and Monica Padman kiss cam. And then it turns into proprietor.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, I don't. Oh, all of this is a nightmare. I'm saying no.

[Dax Shepard]

I always turned the non kiss cam into a kiss cam. When I would go to the Dodgers game with Peter Krausen, my brother. Or anytime they would show us on the big screen just to say, like, parenthood's here, I would turn and try to kiss him as if it were the kiss cam.

[Monica Padman]

That's very funny. Okay, I have. I have a situation that happened.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, okay. Great. It's been a while.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, I'm. I'm. I'm prepping for your response.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, okay.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

So Jess and I went to a restaurant. Quarter Sheets. I probably shouldn't say it, but I said it.

[Dax Shepard]

Pizza place, right?

[Monica Padman]

Yes. Love it. It's very hard to get in. You have. We have a whole routine where you stand in line, you put your name in. It's always like, at least an hour. And then we go next. We go next door, and there's a bar next door called Little Joy. Very cute. We have a drink and chips. They sell chips there.

[Dax Shepard]

Like homemade potato chips?

[Monica Padman]

No, from, like, the gas station.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, okay. Like Ruffles and Lays.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, but like, kind of the fancier ones. Like kettle.

[Jack McBrayer]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

You know, and so they have different ones every time. It's very exciting. Anyway, we do that, and then we go. So we did that the other day, and. And we got to Quarter sheets. There was a really nice couple next to us. And in fact, you know, we ordered. They were getting ready to leave, like they were. Got their check, and we had ordered. We got these beans. They make the best beans. And they're always changing up the beans, and every time they're so good. Oh, my God. So we're eating our beans and we. And like, there's like this couple. And the woman looks at us and she's like, oh, my God, so sorry. We're just like, stare. Or just staring and, like, gawking. And we were just like, I know, the beans are so good. We had this, like, little exchange. They were so nice. They left, right? We're continuing. And then the server comes, he moves that table over. So now there's this.

[Dax Shepard]

They make this big table party of what, six? Eight?

[Jack McBrayer]

Four.

[Monica Padman]

Four.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

But the table's probably, like, for six. Okay. So then these people come in, two couples and their kids. So two couples each with two children. And. And they were little kids, some were babies. And we looked over and they were all sitting and it was like, cute. And, you know, we were like, oh, I wonder, like, are they, like, in laws or like, what's going on? One of the babies was so cute, like, delta level.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

It was wild. And I really wanted to hold it

[Dax Shepard]

once in a generation. Cute.

[Monica Padman]

Yes. And, oh, so cute and small and whatever. Anyway, anyway, so we're like, you know, we. I will admit, I think. Well, I will admit that I think we were looking like, fair amount at this family and, like, they're being cute and they would, like, get up and, like, go and, you know, rock the baby and come back. One of the babies was feeding. One of the kids came around, and I said hi to one of the kids. Okay, all this is going on. Yeah, we're enjoying our meal. It's great. And at the end, we paid and the server brought us this cookie and they said, that's. It's from them.

[Jack McBrayer]

Oh.

[Monica Padman]

And I was like, oh, my gosh, that's so nice. And this is so embarrassing, but I have to admit it, of course I thought they were a fan of the show.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, okay, okay, okay.

[Monica Padman]

So I was like, oh, my God, that. And they were like, because. And she said, because all the kids. Right? And I was like, oh, oh. And Jess and I both were like, no, no, no, that was totally fine. You didn't need to do that. And like, one of the dads was like, no, it's okay. Like, yeah, no problem. But, like, didn't really wasn't like, trying to, like, really engage. Just like, you're welcome. Kind of like, be done with it.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Monica Padman]

And then what? We kept being like, oh, my gosh. Like, I really hope, like, your fam. Like, your family is so cute. We were talking about how cute your kids are and. And Jess was like, yeah, like, we're just single over here. And, you know, there's Kind of some laughter. And then we were leaving. And again, it's like, thanks again so much. You really didn't have to do that. And we both left. And he was like, that was weird. And I was like, it was weird. The moms were mad at us. They would not look at us when all this was going on. On. And, like, I was, like, trying. You know, I was, like, trying to engage, and I mainly was looking at one mom. He mainly was looking at the other. So he was talking about this lady, and I was talking about this lady and experiencing the exact same thing.

[Jack McBrayer]

Uhhuh.

[Monica Padman]

And I was like, wait a minute. Is this some sort of, like, resentment cookie? Like, they thought we were judging them, so they got us this cookie to make, like, to abate the situation. But they were actually just. They were mad that we were upset, but we weren't upset.

[Jack McBrayer]

Huh?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

And then I hated this cookie.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, okay. But you'd already eaten it.

[Monica Padman]

No, I didn't. Sitting in my kitchen.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, it was wrapped.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, okay.

[Monica Padman]

And I felt weird because I was like, oh, God, My. My God. How is it that now we feel bad when we didn't. We really did not. The reason. I know we didn't do anything wrong is because we didn't have any bad thoughts.

[Dax Shepard]

Yes. Sure.

[Monica Padman]

Sure. We actively. We were not like, oh, my God, there's like, so many kids here or anything.

[Dax Shepard]

I.

[Monica Padman]

We. They were so cute.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Especially the little one.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. They're the cutest.

[Monica Padman]

Really wanted to hold it.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

So I didn't like me.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, first of all, I. I do this all the time.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

So, like, when I go out to Bricktops and it's the kids, and we've got a party of nine, and I know we're loud, I often buy the people that are directly next to us as dinner.

[Monica Padman]

That's sweet.

[Dax Shepard]

I do that all the time. But you don't resume them often. They'll go, oh, no. And I go, oh, no, it's fine. That exchange can go on too long.

[Monica Padman]

Well, that's. That's because you're famous.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, no, just, like, I don't want to debate whether you. You, like, you earned it or I shouldn't have done it or whatever. It's just like, I just want to go like, hey, thanks for being a good sport. I know we were allowed. And then if you're kind of like, no, I reject it. No, I loved it. And at some point, I want to go, what? Like, what are we debating now? That you should, like, should you want them to refund my card? Now you pay. Like, maybe. Maybe they just wanted you to go like, thanks and to be done with it and didn't wanna have to beg you to take it or convince you.

[Monica Padman]

We didn't say, like, take it back or we'll buy you one now. Like, it wasn't like a whole thing. Like, it was just like, oh, my God. No.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

That was. It wasn't an issue. Like, they were apologizing and we were saying it was unnecessary. You don't need to apologize.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Monica Padman]

And also, let me tell you something about quarter sheets. If you're going to go there.

[Jack McBrayer]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

This was our table, right?

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, you're. They're here. Okay. So they're.

[Monica Padman]

And that's not an exact.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah. So for Monica, for the listener, we're talking 12 inches.

[Monica Padman]

18 if that. Like, I walk. Had to walk through sideways to get out of the booth.

[Dax Shepard]

This is like me at the fight on Saturday.

[Monica Padman]

You got stuck.

[Dax Shepard]

I was next to a linebacker. Oh, Jared Verse.

[Monica Padman]

Were you scared?

[Dax Shepard]

No. Oh. But I was like, this is. Couldn't be. Be more inconvenient. We're in folding chairs that are butted up next to each other. Had a. Had a dainty woman been next to me, we would have been touching shoulders. But now I had a real linebacker from the LA Rams and I sitting next to each other. Then Ryan, not small. Then Barry Bonds, probably the most jacked baseball player of all time.

[Monica Padman]

Wow. That's cool that he was there.

[Dax Shepard]

It's exciting. There wasn't enough room. Room for all of us. So we had to cor. Choreograph and coordinate. Like they. Ryan and the linebacker would lean forward for a while and watch the fight.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

And then they'd want to come back. And then that was my cue to lean forward. And then Barry Bonds was following suit. So there was like all this.

[Monica Padman]

Was it choreography Spoken.

[Dax Shepard]

All unspoken.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

But of course, because I was touching this man for three hours. This. This gorgeous linebacker. He's so good looking, Monica.

[Monica Padman]

Wow.

[Dax Shepard]

I mean, so good looking. I'm like, this dude's 25 plays for the Rams. He's this good looking. Cool. What a good time that must be. I was very friendly and talking quite a bit. Maybe more than he bargained for. Yeah. But I was like, we are snuggling.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Let's chat a little bit.

[Monica Padman]

He's used to being touched. He's a football player.

[Dax Shepard]

His butt in particular.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. They touch each other's butts and then they. Oh, here he Is very handsome. Very.

[Dax Shepard]

You guys see his smile, though? It's so infectious. That's not a good picture of him because he's chewing on a piece of plastic. But what was I going to tell you about him? I was going to. Oh, he's on a. He's trying to eat non processed food.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, wow.

[Dax Shepard]

Because I offered them some of my caramel corn I had gotten and he said he wasn't with sugar. And I was like, how long you been off sugar? He's like 36 hours. But in general, I try to see process food. I was like, look at this young man. He's 25. He's work. You know, he's conscious of his health.

[Monica Padman]

He has to. It's his job.

[Dax Shepard]

And he's got to put on weight. Like linebackers are supposed to keep on A lot of weight.

[Monica Padman]

Yes. A lot to deal with.

[Dax Shepard]

It was exciting.

[Monica Padman]

Anywho, so. So the closeness, you were very. Sitting very close to him. Yeah, as I was to this family. And so you couldn't really just be like, thanks and then like, turn your head. It had.

[Dax Shepard]

It required a follow up. And I really can't see. I can't make an argument where they're mad at you guys.

[Monica Padman]

I know.

[Jack McBrayer]

Like, it just.

[Monica Padman]

Well, no, I can. I can like the. They're like, stop staring at us. Stop staring at us. Or. Yeah, we have kids. Like, that's. This is what happens. You have kids? Yes. I felt that they were defensive, and then I created a scenario where the husbands are the ones that sent the cookie. Okay, okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Which would be very unconventional. I'll just say that's.

[Monica Padman]

I know. But the husbands were the ones. They were mainly sitting the whole time and the wives were like up and up and back. And so they Maybe. Okay, this is maybe what happened. Okay. Maybe the husbands were like, hey, maybe just like, don't get up. Like don't. Because you're bothering them or something, you know, and then they're like, well, we have to, like, we have to take care of these children.

[Dax Shepard]

You might have stumbled into a little conflict between them.

[Monica Padman]

Exactly. And so then they sent the cookie.

[Dax Shepard]

And then you guys, we weren't doing anything wrong. You don't need to apologize. We're just handling the kids. Maybe they were mad at their husband.

[Monica Padman]

Yep. And then they send this cookie over reiterating that they had everyone had done something wrong. So then they were then mad at us.

[Dax Shepard]

Full vixen. They're like, my husband's sending cookies to this hot chick next to me.

[Monica Padman]

They're like, why did you?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. She's a known cookie boy.

[Monica Padman]

Literally. I am a cookie boy. But they like, why did you do that? We. Nothing. We didn't do anything wrong. You didn't need to do that.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

And then they sent their resentment at us and so I had to throw the cookie away because it's laced with poison.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh my God.

[Monica Padman]

Mental poison.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. It wasn't just. You were full.

[Monica Padman]

No, I took it home.

[Dax Shepard]

I know you took it home, but why didn't.

[Monica Padman]

You could have eaten it any day. I.

[Dax Shepard]

You really didn't want to eat it because it felt.

[Monica Padman]

Felt weird.

[Dax Shepard]

Not jinxed.

[Monica Padman]

I didn't feel jinxed. I just felt. Got annoyed. I got annoyed by the cookie because I was like, now I feel bad and I should not feel bad.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So when you were planning before you laid out the story, you're like, I'm anticipating your response.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And what do you, what would you think my response would be?

[Monica Padman]

I thought you were going to be like, well, yeah, like moms are going through a lot lot and, and, and you know, they probably felt judged. I thought you were going to do a lot of defense of them. Them which I again, I was not judging them.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

They were beautiful women.

[Dax Shepard]

Were they?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, yeah. And then like the daughters. Attractive, so cute one. Yeah, yeah, they were all right.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

They were, they were. The whole thing was beautiful. Everyone was pretty, everyone was hot. The kids were so cute. Like it was a great. Yeah. And then I started to do that. I'm like, now I feel bad. I don't even have a husband or children.

[Dax Shepard]

And some of your own personal stuff came up probably.

[Monica Padman]

I probably can't have them. And like now I feel bad. Excuse me. You have this beautiful child, like. Yeah. So I got upset.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

Well,

[Dax Shepard]

My response is only how do I alleviate your upsetness?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And then my solution to alleviate it is like the oldest fight we have non stop. So it's not even worth, you know, suggesting, which is just. I don't like, like the idea that strangers have sometimes control of your emotions. That's what I don't like.

[Monica Padman]

I know you don't like.

[Dax Shepard]

That's like the.

[Monica Padman]

I understand.

[Dax Shepard]

That's the part where I get protective of you and then it, it always ends up where I'm angering you more. So.

[Monica Padman]

No, you're, you're not.

[Dax Shepard]

But, but I don't like that anybody has any control over your injustice. Fun night out. I know to get, get pizza. That's all I don't like.

[Monica Padman]

But when he, so he. The Fact that he said it first. He is so oblivious to this type of thing. The fact that he said it. He was like, that was. Something was weird.

[Dax Shepard]

Uhhuh.

[Monica Padman]

And I was like, but I think you're.

[Jack McBrayer]

If.

[Dax Shepard]

If any of that was. If you guys read that correctly.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

My money would be fully on. Yes. Some tension between the husbands and wives. Not, Not. Not you guys. Well, you're, like, immaterial. They. At this point, they just want to ignore this whole situation. Situation happens. It's not towards you. It's. It's towards their husbands.

[Monica Padman]

Husbands or. Or us, though. Like, oh, these single people, like, don't understand what it's like. And it's. It's hard for us, like, and it is hard for them. They are having to get up and go and it's.

[Dax Shepard]

Taking little kids to a restaurant is a beat down.

[Monica Padman]

It is a beat down. And what I wanted to be like is like, I know. Like, I don't know because I don't have them. But I've also been to a million restaurants with. With kids, and I've taken kids, a restaurant, restaurants by myself. I feel for you right now. I know that that is hard. I don't feel put upon.

[Dax Shepard]

Right.

[Monica Padman]

And. But I don't want to feel bad for existing.

[Dax Shepard]

Right. Right.

[Monica Padman]

But, you know, I'm over it.

[Dax Shepard]

Just got over it.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. Just got over it. But it's hard. I think, like, family is. Everyone's having a hard time.

[Dax Shepard]

Life's challenging.

[Monica Padman]

Life's challenging. First everyone.

[Dax Shepard]

That's right.

[Monica Padman]

For everyone. And I got this bruise, and I don't know why.

[Dax Shepard]

You're not sure where that came from.

[Monica Padman]

No.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

All right, let's do some facts. This is for.

[Dax Shepard]

I just want to remind everyone about our presenting sponsor, Yellow.

[Monica Padman]

Yes, that's right. Let's circle back.

[Dax Shepard]

You know what's happened since we interviewed Jack McBrayer?

[Jack McBrayer]

What?

[Dax Shepard]

Our family has become obsessed with Zillow Gone wild. And we're actually all caught up now. We're in season three, which is airing now. There's only three episodes out.

[Monica Padman]

Oh.

[Dax Shepard]

And we watched two of them last night, so we know that there's only one for us. And we like to do two a row.

[Monica Padman]

So you're gonna wait.

[Dax Shepard]

But it's. It is. It has replaced. It's been the sav of million dooll secret not being around. It's our current show. We love it. Monica, I. I'm in trouble a lot while we watch it.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, why?

[Dax Shepard]

Because it's Zillow Gone wild. You're seeing a lot of choices.

[Monica Padman]

Sure.

[Dax Shepard]

And I have a lot of opinions about the choices.

[Monica Padman]

But aren't they kind of. They're wild choices by.

[Dax Shepard]

They're wild. They're on the show. Because they're pretty wild.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

So it feels like some of them are very cool. What? I'm more. Well, first of all, the people are very interesting because anyone who's gonna, like, turn their house into a pirate ship.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

You know, they're unique, of course. And then. Oh, this is great. You'll relate to this because this has sometimes been our friction. I think when I notice things, it comes across as me being mean.

[Monica Padman]

Judgmental.

[Dax Shepard]

Judgmental or mean?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, we have gotten into it.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, is it happening on.

[Dax Shepard]

Yes. Because I'm like, oh, no. Notice they blank and I hear dad. And I'm like, wait, so it's from the kids. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Yeah, dad. And I'm like, hold on a second, guys. First of all, this person's not here.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

You love.

[Monica Padman]

That's a big defense of yours.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, it's true. Like this, this person doesn't have any sense that I've said anything, observed anything about them.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And I'm not name calling.

[Monica Padman]

No, no.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm just like, oh, that's an interesting move or whatever.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

That's unique.

[Monica Padman]

Unique is the word I like, remember, you know the word I don't.

[Dax Shepard]

Like weird. You hate weird. That's why I specifically just said unique.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

But do you say weird when you're watching with them?

[Dax Shepard]

No. I'm on high alert with them too. Just like you.

[Monica Padman]

I have to. I, I, I thank God for them that they are also representing me.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. I think my thing, like, what is the thing that gets triggered in me? The thing with me is some kind of baggage, which is like, acknowledging reality isn't mean. Like, reality can be mean.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

The world's implicitly mean in some sense, but pretending certain things don't exist in reality to me feels very dishonest.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And not realistic. It's not how anyone thinks. It's like I say the thing that I know they were thinking, but you're supposed to. Supposed to not say.

[Monica Padman]

Right.

[Dax Shepard]

And that just feels disingenuous. And it's like, what are we talking about?

[Monica Padman]

But some. Okay, but there's a scale. Like, some people aren't thinking.

[Dax Shepard]

You miss a lot of stuff. Yeah, yeah. Like, but I blame your eyes for that. I think some of it is just your eyes, not your character.

[Monica Padman]

Maybe, maybe some of that is true.

[Dax Shepard]

Like we were watching someone infamously where this really came to a head. They had an enormous tongue.

[Monica Padman]

Right.

[Dax Shepard]

To the degree where I was like, I'm. I can feel their struggle of trying to keep their tongue in their mouth, and it's, like, stressing me out.

[Monica Padman]

Where? Of the tongue?

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

And I was like, I didn't notice it. No. Even when you pointed out. I was like, what. What do you mean?

[Dax Shepard]

And here's the spectrum. Right. It's like, you didn't notice. I noticed and said something. Kristin noticed, but hadn't said anything.

[Monica Padman]

But so when.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, when. When I said this, she's like, yeah, I've been watching it too. And then you were like, that's so mean also. What are you talking about?

[Monica Padman]

Well, it was me, to me, because I was like, oh, my God. You. You are. I think. Well, it obviously triggers that.

[Dax Shepard]

People are nitpicking.

[Monica Padman]

Yes. They're looking at everything that's wrong with me, and they notice it. And I already feel that way. And, like. So I. I really. I don't. I don't really do that physically now. I do do it.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. You're watching couples retreat or couples therapy, and I'm sure you have all kinds of.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, God. I'm first to note a personality thing, and I'm. I'm very fast on it. Like, oh, this person. Is this. This person doing this. This person's crazy. This person. I do that all the time, but physically, I really don't do that. And I maybe, as you said, it's not my character, but it is my trauma, and it is my reality. Like, I don't notice.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, you don't notice. There's been a few whammies where we've been observing something. I'm like, you. We did not notice the guy had an eye patch on, you know, or something like that.

[Monica Padman]

This is the notorious story with Callie. I was talking about a girl, and she was like, oh, the one with the lazy eye? And I was like, no, right? And she was like, yeah, she has a very substantial lazy eye.

[Dax Shepard]

You're like Nate in that way. Remember my famous ones. Like, Nate's roommate had Tourette's. Very visible in active Tourette's.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, my God.

[Dax Shepard]

And lived with him for a very long time. And then I said, not in a mean way, just simply inquiring, like, so, so. And so has Tourette's. Like, have they shared it all with that thing? You know what it's like to. I noticed they don't have it when they're performing. That's fascinating.

[Monica Padman]

He was like, what?

[Dax Shepard]

He literally Was like, what are you talking about? And I'm like, what are you talking about? You live with this person. I know everyone here knows this, but you somehow. And you live with the person. I guess it's a beautiful question.

[Jack McBrayer]

Quality.

[Monica Padman]

It. I don't know where it comes from, but it is real. It is real.

[Dax Shepard]

And then, like, do you think any of your friends have massive Tourette's and you've missed it?

[Monica Padman]

They could, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

You seem to know my ticks pretty well. They're not getting by you.

[Monica Padman]

They're not. And neither are Jess's. He would join you there. But anyway. Okay. Yeah, so. So whatever you commenting on that was, quote, mean to them. Like, can you give an example?

[Dax Shepard]

I mean, I'm afraid that the person would know I was talking about them, in which case then it would be mean. So I don't want to use.

[Monica Padman]

Or them.

[Dax Shepard]

Generally them. Oh, well, I mean, I got a lot to say about the houses, too, you know.

[Monica Padman]

Sure.

[Dax Shepard]

I think what's. What's. What's regularly on the table with this show is. And it's sweet. Ultimately. It's sweet, but it's so delusional. A lot of these people are trying to get millions of dollars for these houses that, like, they're the only people in the world that want to live in them. It's so specific.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Someone's gonna have to definitely go in and, like, rip most of everything out.

[Monica Padman]

But it's like, their heart and soul.

[Dax Shepard]

It's their heart and soul. And it's sweet. But I'm also, like, when they show the thing at the beginning, it's like, this many square feet on this much property in this state. $3.8 million. I'm like, guys, I just can't help it. I'm like, guys, they're gonna get 380 grand for this. Like, that's the real. I also feel some obligation to let my kids know, like, market value.

[Monica Padman]

That's not mean.

[Dax Shepard]

That can be mean to them.

[Monica Padman]

Really?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, they love it, you know, but

[Monica Padman]

both can be true.

[Dax Shepard]

It's like, it's not. Again, I don't think it's mean. It's a certain reality. Like, 2400 square feet in the middle of New Mexico, 300 miles from a town.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, but are you saying, like, oh, my God, this dump? And then you're like, okay, I'm going,

[Dax Shepard]

that house is really worth 270. Okay, well, yeah, you know, like, that's just the truth.

[Monica Padman]

The truth is the truth. But. But sometimes you add color to the truth.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, that Might happen more. Well, then, yes. So then some of the houses. I'm just getting physical anxiety imagining being in the house because it's so. There's so much going on. It feels like that's a bad acid trip. Right. It's just like a million doodads everywhere and there's not a single plain wall you could like, look at and calm yourself.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And so I will be expressing like, they'll go into the bathroom.

[Jack McBrayer]

Like, oh.

[Dax Shepard]

Like I physically am. Like, I can't imagine sitting in that room.

[Monica Padman]

Right, dad?

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, you know, It's sweet. You're right. It's great. Every place is great for them. Oh, that's not true. That's not true. They're discerning because at the end of each episode you're going to vote. They vote on the show. What was the most extreme house? And so we have favorites and then we're pulling for certain ones. Some incredible tree houses and stuff.

[Monica Padman]

They're aware of people like I. Yeah, yeah. They're not naive.

[Dax Shepard]

You know what it is? And this is a great, great thing. I think for them, if like it were quarterbacks of famous football teams houses we were going through and there was something insane about it, that'd be fine. But these are often really kind of introverted, cute people. And they just rather, you know, I get it. They're like the notion that. And they're, they're tender and fragile in the notion that anyone say anything critical would be, would be overwhelming to them. And they feel protective of those people. That's how I feel through the television set.

[Monica Padman]

That's how I feel.

[Dax Shepard]

And I go, but guys, you know, cuz remember one time, there's no toilet in that floor.

[Monica Padman]

I know, but remember when we got in a fight because you did a voice of somebody, okay. And I said, I said, well, probably we don't know the person sounds like. But you, by looking at them, gave them a voice.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, sure, sure.

[Monica Padman]

And I said, dax, that's so mean. And then you gotta look, here's the other thing. It's like you are funny and you make jokes and you do things like that. But then you're also very sensitive. So then if someone then says, like, that's mean. You feel like, I'm not mean. Like, you get defensive because you're like

[Dax Shepard]

never in person because you don't make someone feel bad to be a mean person. Right. And in real life, I mean, you're

[Monica Padman]

not a mean person.

[Dax Shepard]

For the safety of my bedroom, I do want to comment on this person's Wardrobe.

[Monica Padman]

Right. And so. But in that same way, that person that you gave the voice to, I felt it was a fragile person, you know, so.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, but their voice probably sounded like

[Monica Padman]

it probably did, but, like, who cares? Okay. Is the movie called Macon County Line? Yes, that is a movie. 1974 Action Crime. Only an hour and 29 minutes. You know, that's my kind of movie.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. You hate anything over 155.

[Monica Padman]

I love a short movie. Oh, he said he was going to send us photos of his closet, but I doubt he did, did he?

[Dax Shepard]

He didn't send me anything. I don't think he likes me anymore. After that interview. I think this is one of the first. Generally, people come in here and maybe I think I'm not gonna like him. We become friends. This is the first time, like, a friend came in and I don't think he likes me anymore. Pretty sure he doesn't.

[Monica Padman]

Of course he does. He just doesn't. He just doesn't want to be interviewed. Interviewed?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah. That's fair.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. Chicago. The Chicago heat wave of 1995. 739 people died.

[Dax Shepard]

That's crazy.

[Monica Padman]

I know. Five day period. Scary.

[Dax Shepard]

That's over 100 a day.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, my God. It peaked at 120. 76 degrees.

[Jack McBrayer]

What?

[Dax Shepard]

In Chicago?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. Rob, what were you doing then?

[Jack McBrayer]

I don't. I don't remember that at all.

[Monica Padman]

Do you think you're. Maybe you were on vacation.

[Dax Shepard]

He was laying bare naked on his sheets with a fan on him. He was a baby and he was constantly getting aroused.

[Monica Padman]

Ew. No.

[Dax Shepard]

That's what was happening.

[Monica Padman]

He was a child.

[Jack McBrayer]

No.

[Dax Shepard]

How old?

[Jack McBrayer]

Six years old.

[Dax Shepard]

Inappropriate. I. I was picturing 16.

[Monica Padman]

It was in 95.

[Jack McBrayer]

97.

[Monica Padman]

It was 95. Maybe your parents took you out of town.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah, maybe.

[Monica Padman]

Because it was in July.

[Dax Shepard]

You probably had great air conditioning. Didn't even know.

[Jack McBrayer]

Yeah, that's what I was thinking.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. Was Jeff Richmond the SNL music director? Yeah, he was the music director for SNL and then 30 Rock and then a lot of other shows, too.

[Dax Shepard]

I think he might have done Baby Mama's.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, probably score not list. Oh, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Jack McBrayer]

Wow.

[Monica Padman]

Ding, ding, ding. In 2008, he composed the score to the film Baby Mama, which starred Tina Fey and Amy Poehler and Dax Shepard.

[Dax Shepard]

It doesn't say that.

[Monica Padman]

No, but I'll add it. It says citation needed. I'll add it. I'll add it.

[Dax Shepard]

More attorney in that, too. I bet there's some people that would come before me.

[Monica Padman]

I think you'd be next. Is Greg Kinnear in it.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Both of you would be next.

[Dax Shepard]

The Kinirski. Steve Martin's in it.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, shit.

[Jack McBrayer]

Small part.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, small part.

[Monica Padman]

Well, there are no small parts. Okay. How many people are deficient in vitamin D?

[Dax Shepard]

Everyone.

[Monica Padman]

It does say globally, about 1 billion people. So in the United States, estimates of deficiency widely vary from 30% to over 60. 60% of adults.

[Dax Shepard]

I feel like it's the most common thing people find out when they start doing lab work.

[Monica Padman]

I know. I almost don't. I'm like, if everyone is, then no one is.

[Dax Shepard]

I got mine straight. Mine was in the toilet. There's also this chicken and the egg thing, which is. Does low vitamin D cause inflammation or does the inflammation deplete your ability to process and hold vitamin D? So for a long time, they were looking at as the cause, and now. So some people think it is the result.

[Monica Padman]

Interesting. Okay. Is finagle French for favor? No.

[Dax Shepard]

No way.

[Monica Padman]

No. You said that as a joke.

[Dax Shepard]

As a joke, yeah.

[Monica Padman]

But the origin of the word finagle, it emerged as American slang in the 1920s. It likely derives from an older English and Irish dialect word, fenang, which means to cheat at cards or renege on a promise.

[Dax Shepard]

That word, reneg makes my children.

[Monica Padman]

Me, too. I don't like it.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. We were playing spades last night at dinner at a restaurant, and I said, oh, you just accidentally reneged? And they were like, what? What did you. And they've heard it before. Yeah, it's a dicey. Yeah, it's really. Yeah, I know.

[Monica Padman]

I know it is.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, my God. There was a crazy moment I saw the Giovann had Tyson. Mike Tyson on a live show.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, cool.

[Dax Shepard]

They did a live show.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

And Tyson made him say the N word. He was not taking no for an answer.

[Monica Padman]

What?

[Dax Shepard]

Yes. I was like, geez Louise. What is. What happened?

[Monica Padman]

Why? Like, what was. What was the context?

[Dax Shepard]

What was it? I. I dropped in pretty. It was mid.

[Monica Padman]

That's so strange.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. He's like, just say it. He's like, come on, say it.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, my God.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, he was like. He was bullying him. And. And you're. And it's Mike Tyson. You know, you gotta.

[Monica Padman]

He could eat your ear.

[Dax Shepard]

You gotta be careful. You gotta kind of do whatever he says.

[Monica Padman]

Well, you could hold your own. You could hold your boundary. Like, sir, please, I am not comfortable saying that.

[Dax Shepard]

I don't like that word. Sir.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, that's how you say. That's how you hold your boundary.

[Dax Shepard]

I can see why Tyson did it. I can see being in that situation

[Monica Padman]

and doing he's so provocative. I mean, my God, he just can't stop himself.

[Dax Shepard]

Tyson or. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, he's a one of a kind. This is. You know, again, you don't get all. You know, you be the, like, fucking most decisive punch thrower in the history of boxing.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And then you also went to a finishing school.

[Monica Padman]

You know, you probably don't get all those at once.

[Dax Shepard]

No, no. And. And that is a result of, like, really overweight as a kid, being terribly bullied and his pigeons being killed. I mean, just a terrible childhood.

[Monica Padman]

I mean, I don't think he's. I don't think he should have gone to finish. I don't think anyone needs to go to finishing school.

[Dax Shepard]

I don't.

[Monica Padman]

But I also don't think you should force someone to say the N word.

[Dax Shepard]

Right. Unless you're. You're. He's entertained by it, and it's his right to do whatever you want because he's the one who has to deal

[Monica Padman]

with it, like, in an audience. Like, that's like.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm not saying Theo should have. I'm saying. I understand. Understand. He's like, I'm the one who gets to say this.

[Monica Padman]

He gets to say it.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. And he gets to say. Now I want you to say, I know, but. Because it's mine.

[Monica Padman]

But no one can force anyone to do something they don't want to do.

[Dax Shepard]

Correct.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Unless it's to save their own life. Then it gets a little murky.

[Monica Padman]

But okay, well, yeah, if they're like.

[Dax Shepard]

If he's like, I don't want this oxygen mask. You're like, shut the up. I'm gonna shove it on your face.

[Monica Padman]

It's true there are exceptions.

[Dax Shepard]

There are very few, but. Okay. All right. Love you. We are supported by Allstate. Checking Allstate first could save you hundreds on car insurance. Not checking what the warning light means before pulling out of your driveway, you absolutely convince yourself it was probably just a sensor thing, right up until you were standing on the side of the road waiting for a tow. Yeah. Checking first is the right move. So check Allstate first for an auto quote. It could save you hundreds. And for fast, reliable help when you need it, add an Allstate roadside plan. Today, you're in good hands with Allstate Potential savings vary insurance and roadside assistance plans are subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Insurance provided by Allstate North America Insurance Company, Northbrook, Illinois. Roadside assistance plans provided by Allstate Motor Club Incorporated and Allstate Affiliate.