Transcript

Dax Shepard (0:00)

Wondry plus subscribers can listen to Armchair Expert early and ad free right now. Join Wondry plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts or you can listen for free wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome, welcome welcome to Armchair Anonymous. I'm and I'm joined by Lily Padman.

Mel Robbins (0:22)

Hi.

Dax Shepard (0:23)

It's that time of year. The seasons are upon us.

Monica Padman (0:27)

It's holiday time.

Dax Shepard (0:29)

It's the holidays. I love the holidays.

Monica Padman (0:33)

Me too. Me too. It makes me feel very, very dusty.

Dax Shepard (0:38)

I feel bad for Bah Humbuggers A I'm sad that they're missing out on the joy I have. But then additionally, can you imagine if you didn't like it and then everyone around you loved it? That would really compound it.

Monica Padman (0:50)

That'd be hard.

Dax Shepard (0:51)

It'd be really hard. But that's not us.

Jenna (Guest from Naperville) (0:53)

Luckily.

Dax Shepard (0:54)

We love it.

Monica Padman (0:54)

Love it.

Dax Shepard (0:55)

Yeah, of course. For this holiday of giving thanks, we have Thanksgiving disasters. Thanksgiving's always good for some disasters and we have them today. Please enjoy Thanksgiving disasters. We are supported by Ms. Now. Whether it's breaking news, exclusive reporting, or in depth analysis, Ms. now keeps people at the heart of everything they do, empowering Americans with the information and insights that can bring us together. Home to the Rachel Maddow Show, Morning Joe, the Briefing with Jen Psaki and voices you know and trust. Ms. NOW is your source for news, opinion and the world. Their name is new, but you'll find the same commitment to truth and community that you've relied on for years. They'll continue to cover the day's most important stories, ask the tough questions, and explain how it all impacts you. Same mission, new name, Ms. now. Learn more at Ms. Now. This show is sponsored by Liquid IV. You know what? I've been feeling it lately. That post summer crash where you're trying to get back into your fall routine but your energy just isn't there. Maybe it's the shorter days, maybe it's just life. But I was definitely dragging. Then I remembered I had stocked up on Liquid IV and it's been exactly what I've needed. Their new energy multiplier, Sugar free hydrating energy formula has natural caffeine plus electrolytes so I get the energy boost I need without the crash or jitters. Just one stick and 16 ounces of water hydrates better than water alone and it's always non gmo, vegan and gluten free.

Summary

Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard

Episode: Armchair Anonymous: Thanksgiving III

Release Date: November 28, 2025

Overview

This special "Armchair Anonymous" episode, “Thanksgiving III,” dives into memorable Thanksgiving disaster stories from listeners across North America. Hosted by Dax Shepard and Monica Padman (with guests Lily Padman and Mel Robbins joining briefly), the episode captures tales of chaos, bodily mishaps, and hilarious misfortunes at the Thanksgiving table. The spirit is lighthearted and supportive, as Dax, Monica, and their guests reflect on the messiness and humor inherent in the holiday.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Hosts' Holiday Philosophy

Timestamps: [00:27]–[00:53]

Dax and Monica express their genuine love for the holidays.
Empathy for people who don’t enjoy holiday festivities:
- Quote: “Can you imagine if you didn't like it and then everyone around you loved it? That would really compound it.” — Dax [00:38]
They introduce the theme: Thanksgiving disasters, and their love for celebrating human messiness.

2. Jenna from Naperville: "The Liquor Splash Catastrophe"

Timestamps: [03:24]–[10:25]

Story Highlights:

Jenna recounts a 20-year-old Thanksgiving incident in a massive Midwestern family (her father is one of 12 siblings).
Setting: Aunt Sally’s first time hosting, obsessively protective over her new house with white carpets.
Uncle (an alcoholic at the time) drinks excessively — 4 liters of Diet Coke & a fifth of Jack Daniels — before dinner.
At dinner, uncle projectile vomits three liters across the table, setting off a chain-reaction among children and resulting chaos.
Aunt Sally immediately prioritizes her carpet, orders everyone out, discards all the food, and shampoos carpets.
Consequences: The uncle is unfazed, no real apology is made, and the family jokes about it for decades.
Aunt Sally’s marriage ended two years later.
The uncle got sober, but not until a decade after the incident.

Notable Quotes:

“Because it's all liquid. The splash zone, let's say, was quite large across the table.” — Jenna [07:19]
“Thanksgiving's one day. These carpets are for life.” — Dax [08:10]
“We continue to make fun of him to this day. Nobody wants to sit by him at any of the holidays...” — Jenna [09:27]
Reflection: Monica notes, “It's probably hardest to hit your rock bottom around family because there is some cushion and built-in forgiveness.” [09:42]

3. Caitlin from Kentucky: "Slippery When Hammed"

Timestamps: [12:08]–[25:02], [21:44]–[25:01]

Story Highlights:

Caitlin shares her first Thanksgiving hosting as a newlywed, combining her West Virginia and Oklahoma families.
Ham, prepared in a foil pan, is set on the counter, creating a logistical struggle between Caitlin (wants a heating mat underneath) and her husband (worried pan will buckle).
When he’s forced to move it, hot juice floods the kitchen, scalds his legs, and turns the floor into an ice rink.
Multiple family members slip, including Caitlin and her father; chaos erupts as everyone tries to help but just keeps slipping.
After cleaning up sticky, hammy chaos, the husband changes pants — but keeps his slippery boots, leading to a fall down the stairs.
Despite burns and bruises, the family salvages the ham and dinner continues.
Caitlin expresses gratitude to Dax and Monica for their help coping with addiction in her family (a touching, heartfelt moment).

Notable Quotes:

“Those pans are like IKEA furniture. He starts moving it around. It's gon like, taco, and all this shit's gonna leak out.” — Dax [15:09]
“Gallons of hot juice down him. Oh, it's scalding hot because he had just pulled it out of the oven.” — Caitlin [15:56]
“Where do the wise. Maybe no disposable trays. Maybe no heating pads this Thanksgiving.” — Caitlin [23:01]
“Can I throw something out there? Still use the disposable tray, but put a cookie sheet under it...” — Dax [23:07]

Touching Moment:

Caitlin shares how “Day 7” podcast helped her during her husband’s treatment for addiction:
- “Your Day 7 podcast is my lifeline. …I wouldn’t have made it through this year without you guys.” [25:13]

4. Liz from Southern California: "Thanksgiving: The Literal Sh*tshow"

Timestamps: [26:19]–[37:18]

Story Highlights:

Liz describes hosting Thanksgiving in a cramped 800 sq ft apartment for 12 people after moving back from abroad.
Family includes her diabetic grandmother (special dietary prep).
Mid-dinner, grandmother falls ill and soils Liz’s bed, leading to frantic cleaning and strategic attempts at maintaining dignity as the apartment fills with guests.
Situation spirals: grandmother, then mother, and then other guests are all hit by a severe gastrointestinal bug (norovirus).
“Out both ends” scenarios ensue throughout the single bathroom.
The rest of the weekend, guests are sick; Liz herself falls ill at the zoo, and eventually everyone except her fiancé is bedridden.
Postscript: They vow to never host 12 people in one bathroom again.

Notable Quotes:

“About halfway through dinner, my grandma starts to note that she’s not feeling so hot…” — Liz [28:30]
“Your grandma didn’t make it. And I was like, what?” — Liz [29:10]
“So now eight people still trying to eat dinner smells like human shit.” — Liz [30:02]
“This is a norovirus situation.” — Monica [33:11]
“We will never host an event again. That’s smart. It was a literal shit show.” — Liz [35:36]
“The diabetes was a red herring.” — Dax [35:42]

5. Devin from Ontario: "The Canadian Thanksgiving Tent Explosion"

Timestamps: [42:03]–[53:10]

Story Highlights:

Devin details a Canadian Thanksgiving tradition: 80 people camping in the wilderness, hunting partridge, setting up a kitchen tent, and drinking heavily.
In 2012, after drinking, Devin turns in early. When her mother can’t find her, a frantic (and fruitless) search by flashlight follows until she’s discovered sleeping in her tent.
Later, while sleeping on an air mattress with family, her dad attempts to light a propane heater after letting gas fill the tent:
- “The only way I can really describe it is that the birth of a new star happens localized entirely within our tiny tent.” — Devin [49:00]
A fireball destroys mattresses, sleeping bags, and tents—but everyone escapes unharmed.
The next day, Mom’s anger at Devin’s disappearance evaporates upon seeing Dad’s singed appearance and the wrecked tent.
Honorable mentions: Uncle falls into bonfire, another uncle nearly severs his thumb, another falls on a chainsaw (but survives).
Family pride and ongoing chaos frame Devin’s retelling, which Dax and Monica compare to a reality show.

Notable Quotes:

“It's basically a bowling pin on two legs, because it is about as stupid. You don't even really have to hunt them…” (re: partridges) — Devin [44:00]
“I'm happier to hear that there was an explosion versus the propane was just left on all night and everyone got carbonated poisoning.” — Dax [51:10]
“You guys need to consider making a reality show based on just this weekend.” — Dax [52:33]

Memorable and Notable Moments

Dax’s comic riff on comparing Chicago and Detroit’s drinking cultures: “If you’re walking around at 2 in the morning, every 10th person’s gonna throw up in the street.” [10:39]
Monica’s recurring empathy for hosts, family messes, and the stress of trying to ‘do it all’ on Thanksgiving.
Running theme: recognizing the chaos, humility, and humor in shared human traditions.
Meta-moment: Monica and Dax encourage listeners going through disasters to “take notes”—“at least you’ll have a story to call in with next year.” [37:37]
Gratitude and connection: Repeated appreciation for the show’s impact—from personal shoutouts to expressions of community among listeners.

Timestamps by Story

Opening and holiday intro: [00:27]–[00:53]
Jenna (Naperville): [03:24]–[10:25]
Caitlin (Kentucky): [12:08]–[25:02]
Liz (SoCal): [26:19]–[37:18]
Devin (Ontario): [42:03]–[53:10]

Key Takeaways

Holidays are uniquely prone to disaster, but these moments become family lore.
Grace, humor, and perspective are essential tools for surviving—and even enjoying—life’s messier moments.
The podcast provides a space for catharsis, laughter, and building community out of embarrassing misfortune.
Support and empathy (especially regarding addiction and family struggle) are central themes.
“Disasters” are often retold as treasured, bonding experiences—painful at the time, but hilarious in hindsight.

Closing

The episode is a riotous, heartfelt celebration of imperfection—with Dax, Monica, and listeners finding camaraderie in chaos. If your Thanksgiving implodes, you’re in good company, and you’ll likely have a story to share next year.