Armchair Anonymous: Unexpected Orgasm II

Summary

Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard

Episode: Armchair Anonymous: Unexpected Orgasm II
Date: November 14, 2025

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Episode Overview

This “Armchair Anonymous” edition delves into uniquely human experiences—specifically, stories of unintentional, unexpected orgasms. Dax, Monica, and the Armchair team welcome anonymous callers who candidly share moments of surprise climax, blending humor, awkwardness, science, medical mystery, and even a touch of public service. The tone is warm, open, supportive, and, as always, a little irreverent.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Setting the Scene: Hosts’ Attitudes Toward Unexpected Orgasms

• Dax and Monica set the mood—fun, a bit of nervousness that some stories could be fabricated, but ultimately a sense that these deeply personal admissions are real, and even life-affirming.
• Dax: “An orgasm is a gift. Nature gave us a couple gifts and this is one of them. And if one smacks you out of nowhere, how exciting.” (03:51)
• Monica admits apprehension but agrees these stories are powerful and honest.

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2. Caller Stories

Story 1: Betsy and the Tiger Safari (03:04–16:25)

Location: British Columbia
Story Highlights:

• Betsy, a high school senior, recalls a family trip to India at peak hormonal frustration (no privacy, missed chance to lose virginity).
• On a rickety tiger safari truck, after weeks of “pent up” energy and a regretful overindulgence in chai, Betsy is overcome by the need to pee.
• The combination of bladder pressure, bumpy ride, and sexual frustration leads—completely unexpectedly—to an extremely intense orgasm, surrounded by her family and strangers. “It honestly was the strongest orgasm I’ve had in my entire life.” (10:12)
• Betsy struggles to maintain composure, faces intense embarrassment, and later fails to actually pee due to muscle tension.
• Dax and Monica theorize about factors: pressure, secrecy, shame and public exposure, and even the "Time Traveler’s Wife" novel Betsy was reading.
• Memorable Quote:
  • Betsy: “I’m just sitting there, trying to process the fact that I just had a 10 out of 10 orgasm next to my dad and brother and mom and while 15 other people watch me.” (11:47)
  • “I’m still trying to reach that kind of high again.” (10:49)
  • Dax (to Betsy): “Your greatest orgasm was in public, being stared at and being shamed. Like, I could imagine this turning into some weird kink.” (14:42)
• Happy Ending: The boy she pined for became her husband.

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Story 2: Dylan’s Double Whammy (Land Surveyor in Northwest Territories) (21:12–28:15)

• Dylan, a land surveyor near the Arctic Circle, recalls being at his girlfriend’s new house, urgently needing to use the bathroom. The toilet is out of commission and the situation becomes desperate.
• As he races to a gas station, physical straining triggers “the wildest orgasm” of his life—without any arousal or erection.
  • Dylan: “My legs give out and I explode in my pants with semen.” (25:16)
  • “It was an insane orgasm… Good. Oh, it was wild.” (25:36-25:41)
  • “Not hard or aroused in the slightest bit.” (26:18)
• Monica and Dax marvel at a “flaccid orgasm,” comparing it to the previous “bumpy ride” story in both pain/pressure and surprise.
• To cap it off, Dylan soils himself, makes a hasty, embarrassed clean-up at the gas station, and lies to his girlfriend about the ordeal.
• Memorable Quote:
  • Dax: “An erection-free flaccid orgasm. Wow, that’s cool. Should be studied.” (26:26-26:29)
• Dylan kept the incident secret, even from his sister—who is a huge Armchair fan.

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Story 3: Kylie and the Bareback Horse (San Marcos, Texas) (29:05–37:03)

• Kylie, a self-professed “horse girl” from Iowa, describes riding a retired racehorse bareback as a teen.
• During a canter in the barn’s indoor arena, focused on balance and core engagement (without a saddle), Kylie notices intense abdominal and lower sensations she’d never before experienced.
  • “These spasms are getting a little bit more intense… and they start going a little further south.” (31:32)
  • She climaxes, blacking out a bit and making noises—her first orgasm, with her friend looking on, confused.
  • “I do think the bareback factor, though, really added more to this.” (34:28)
• The hosts discuss the “horse-girl orgasm” stereotype, confirming its realness while defusing crude myths from teen boys.
• The experience, despite being strong, never recurred.
• Memorable Quotes:
  • Kylie: “He set the standard for me. I’ll say that. Like, level up, gentlemen.” (35:40)
• She gives a heartfelt shoutout to Dax for his openness about recovery, crediting his transparency as a beacon of hope for her own sobriety journey.

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Story 4: Cynthia’s Medical Mystery (Canada) (43:14–54:58)

• Cynthia experiences spontaneous orgasms triggered by mundane events—driving over railroad tracks, sitting in a bar, being touched on the shoulders while curling.
  • “I have involuntary orgasms.” (47:54)
  • Experiences deep shame, confusion, and eventually depression; even her family worries.
• Her physician is old-school and unsympathetic:
  • Doctor: “Oh my god, don’t tell anybody that, they’ll laugh at you.” (47:54)
• A three-year diagnostic odyssey culminates in finding out about PGAD (Persistent Genital Arousal Disorder).
• Eventually, she connects with a practitioner who discovers her hysterectomy scar tissue is pressing on nerves, triggering the symptoms.
  • He treats her with shockwave therapy (typically used for kidney stones), and the symptoms resolve:
  • “Finally I got rid of it. I felt, I guess, what it feels like to be reborn or something.” (52:56)
• Cynthia wants her story to be a public service announcement—more people have PGAD than reported, often due to shame.
• Dax and Monica highlight her courage, and the value of finding a “label” for her experience.
• Memorable Quotes:
  • Cynthia: “No, it’s not enjoyable anymore.” (48:50)
  • “It just happened that the same week I find a psychotherapist the next province over... she thinks the treatment for me is to masturbate more... but it doesn’t get rid of it.” (50:34–51:07)

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• Dax’s summary:
  • “I've never had an orgasm that good.” (16:37)
• Monica’s take on public orgasms:
  • “It would be bad if you were at your kid’s school.” (15:19)
• Medical “aha”:
  • Cynthia’s provider: “You have a lot of scar tissue in there... scar tissue is pushing down or pinching on a nerve that's leading to your vagina... that's what's causing the orgasms.” (52:13)
• Humorous reflections:
  • Dax (about being jealous): “I still have a hard time not being jealous of it. I recognize it would be inconvenient.” (55:15)
• Ending on a high note—Monica: “Hopefully this helps somebody.” (53:42)
• Dax: “That was sincere, sensational.” (56:04)

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Segment Timestamps

| Timestamp | Segment | |---------------|-------------| | 03:04 – 16:25 | Betsy’s tiger safari story (unexpected orgasm while on a bumpy truck in India) | | 21:12 – 28:15 | Dylan’s rural “double whammy” (orgasm and accident during an emergency bathroom run) | | 29:05 – 37:03 | Kylie’s first orgasm while riding a horse bareback | | 43:14 – 54:58 | Cynthia’s multi-year journey with PGAD and eventual resolution |

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Tone & Language

• Open, humorous, candid, and supportive.
• Hosts and guests use everyday, accessible language with a blend of science, empathy, and lighthearted joking.
• There’s camaraderie and warmth both between hosts and guests, even when the stories are awkward or emotionally vulnerable.

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Conclusion & Takeaways

• The episode is both entertaining and informative, illuminating a rarely discussed aspect of human sexuality: involuntary orgasms and the many contexts in which they can occur.
• The stories alternate between hilarious and deeply touching, from the logistical nightmares of public climax, to the unexpected health insights (PGAD tied to scar tissue), to affirmations about self-acceptance.
• Listeners are reminded of the importance of removing shame from unusual bodily experiences, seeking help when needed, and the relief and connection that can come from honest sharing.
• Dax and Monica close by reaffirming that there will definitely be a third installment, given the popularity and power of these stories.

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Memorable Final Moments

• Monica: “For anyone listening, if this is happening, you got scar tissue, bro.” (55:54)
• Dax: “Stay warm up in Canada and happy holidays.” (54:58)
• Dax: “That was sincere, sensational.” (56:04)

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Summary prepared for listeners who want to get the full impact, humor, and humanity of the episode, while skipping ads and tangents.

Transcript

[A]

Welcome.

[B]

That should have been for Halloween. I never did.

[C]

Okay, you can do it now.

[B]

Okay. Welcome.

[D]

Welcome.

[B]

To Archer Anonymous. Today, back by our popular demand.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Unexpected orgasm number two.

[C]

It's good.

[B]

These are great.

[C]

It's good.

[E]

And I'm always.

[C]

I will say, I'm always a little apprehensive that you're really nervous.

[B]

People are gonna fib.

[C]

Yeah, I am. I'm nervous fibbers and my radar's on. But I don't believe any of these to be fibs.

[B]

No. And in fact, one, I'll add, we're having fun. Fun, fun, fun. Three, people are spraying all over the place. That's fun. And then another person, there's spray, spray, spray. And then. Oh, it's not very fun.

[C]

It's not fun. And we learned something.

[B]

Yeah, it took a turn. Please enjoy unexpected and literally. I hope everyone gets to enjoy an unexpected orgasm. We are supported by Allstate. You know what's smart? Checking Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds on car insurance. You know what's not smart? Not checking your phone's volume before blasting your morning pump up playlist in the office break room. Or not checking that your laptop camera's off before joining the meeting in your robe or something I'm a little too familiar with. Not checking your grocery list before heading to the store and realizing you bought everything except what you needed. Yeah, checking first is smart. So check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings vary subject to terms, condition and availability. Allstate North American Insurance Company and Affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois. This episode is brought to you by Audible. Love can take many forms. Sometimes it's a chance encounter at a gas station that turns into a ten year relationship. Other times it's texting someone you up and accidentally falling in love. Audible's collection of romance audiobooks has it all. Things Think relatable situationships, historical scandals, forbidden magic, and yes, plenty of stories that are headphones only. Wink, wink. Hear modern rom coms from authors like Leanne Slade and Emily Henry. The latest romantasy series from Sarah J. Maas and Lauren Roberts. Regency favorites like Pride and Prejudice, plus all the steamy stuff. Whether it's a duke, a billionaire, or a winged lord from the night Court. Your first great love story is free when you sign up for a 30 day trial at audible.com. dax hard times come and go. Good times take them slow. My life, I had them both. Remember one thing you got to know I'mma keep on shining. Hi.

[F]

Hello.

[D]

Hello.

[B]

What a warm, comfy, inviting sweater you're in. Is it fall weather where you're at?

[D]

It is nice and cozy. I'm not mad about it.

[C]

Where are you?

[D]

I am in British Columbia. Friendly neighbor of the north.

[B]

Do you have a fake name that you've already picked out?

[D]

I would love for you two to come up with one for me. Dreamed of this happening.

[B]

Betsy. Okay, yeah, Betsy's a very fun name for an unexpected orgasm. Like, oh, you know Betsy, right?

[C]

You know Betsy, she's unpredictable.

[D]

Can't believe I'm about to say this story.

[B]

Oh, I'm so proud of you. Yes, I absolutely feel very honored.

[D]

Literally, I just told my husband this story when I submitted it. So this is the second time I'm now saying this out loud.

[B]

He had never heard it.

[D]

No, this was buried deep in the archives.

[B]

And really quick, without giving any of the story away, what was his reaction? I'm assuming he loved it.

[D]

He loved it.

[C]

Yeah. These are good stories for husbands.

[B]

They want that and it should be across the board. Cuz an organism is a gift. Nature gave us a couple gifts and this is one of them.

[C]

I would agree.

[B]

And if one smacks you out of nowhere, how exciting.

[C]

Okay, okay, let's hear it.

[D]

Okay, I'll get right into it. So set the scene here. This story took place about 15 years ago. I was a senior in high school at the time. My family, very adventurous travelers and we were going on kind of one of our last big family trips before I went off to university the next year and we were going to India for a whole month.

[B]

A month. They are adventurous.

[D]

Yeah. My parents and younger brother had left a week before me. I had to stay behind to finish exams, which I wasn't mad about because being typical 17 year old home by myself for a week, I decided this is the time I'm gonna throw a massive house party. This was a night I was gonna lose my virginity to this boy that I'd been seeing.

[A]

Oh wow.

[B]

So much on the table. I'm approving of the second game plan. The first one, the house party. This is my big nightmare.

[C]

Really?

[B]

Yeah. I've got two kids and I've got a pretty good place to host a party. And I travel.

[C]

It's coming.

[D]

Risky business.

[B]

Oh God.

[D]

Okay, so anyways, as you can imagine, night did not go according to plan. I got way too drunk to have sex, ended up passing out. Oh man, did get some action. So I was happy about that. But no, not the full shebang. So sadly woke up very much still a virgin and with a very trashed house. Okay, so all that to say I was very horny. Teenager sex is all I could think about at this point. Point in time. So the thought of spending three weeks in India sharing hotel rooms with my family meant no chance of funny business. And this was honestly devastating. I was pretty active in the self entertainment department.

[B]

Right. And if you don't mind my asking, we're talking daily. I just want to comp it to my activity as a teenager.

[D]

Probably daily at this point in time.

[B]

Good for you.

[C]

Yeah, that's great.

[D]

Miss those days. Fast forward to the end of the trip. We're in India. Trip is going great. Having a fun time. But at this point, I'm feeling pretty pent up. My sex drive all time high. I've been messaging this boy back at home. I'm reading the Time Traveler's Wife, which turns out was a very steamy novel.

[C]

Isn't it, like, really sad?

[B]

You can, like, hardly be contained. Betsy, I love that you're about to explode on the family vacation.

[C]

I feel like that book is extremely sad.

[B]

Is it? And sexy.

[C]

I don't remember the sexy part.

[B]

Maybe her kink is, like, being really depressed.

[C]

Oh, I understand.

[D]

I don't know. I feel like I need to revisit this book because I also. So I remember being very sad now as an adult, but I remember this book was getting me going.

[C]

Anything would get you going. It sounds like you're just primed.

[D]

I'm really just counting down the days till I'm home and can have some privacy. So we're in the Jaipur region, and we're so excited to go on this tiger safari. So we pile into this big open truck bed, kind of like a smaller semi truck. And there's, like, two benches where people are just sitting facing each other. And we're just in the open. So there's probably about 20 of us sitting on these benches facing each other.

[B]

Can I interrupt you, Betsy? Are you Monica? Doing what I'm doing? I'm like, okay, is it gonna be an elephant working on something? This will be new, like riding the elephant. Grind, grind, grind. And then I'm like, ooh, rickety truck through the jungle. Bounce, bounce, bounce. I'm, like, trying to figure out what's a red herring.

[C]

I have an idea. We don't wanna spoil anything.

[B]

Yeah, we don't. I just wanted to know if you were trying to ratchet through options.

[C]

I have a thought.

[B]

Like, oh, someone brought a broomstick.

[F]

Oh, okay.

[B]

There's a broomstick in the mix.

[D]

We're on this truck. We are the only white people on this truck surrounded by kind of a bunch of local families and young children. And I will say the who were in India. Everyone thought I was a Bollywood star. I don't know why. I had very dark, long hair. At this time, I was getting pictures taken of me nonstop.

[A]

Oh, wow.

[F]

Wow.

[D]

All eyes were on me kind of at all times. So the families are looking at us, kind of giggling, waving, taking some pictures. So I'm sitting between my dad and brother. My mom's off to the side of us, and we take off through this jungle, literally on the bumpiest dirt road possible. We are flying 50 miles per hour for sure. Like, there's no way we were ever gonna spot an actual tiger. It was pure chaos.

[B]

Oh, he's just getting through. He maybe had prior engagement.

[C]

Maybe he had to Tonka. Maybe he'll call for.

[B]

Sometimes there's overlaps, unexpected stuff happening.

[D]

Yeah, we're thinking, okay, this will eventually slow down, like once we get to the tiger spotting area. But about 30 minutes into flying down the road, we realize, okay, this is probably what the whole excursion is going to be like. So we're laughing to ourselves, realizing we definitely booked the budget version of this tour and are probably not going to see any tigers. The guides are just chit chatting away, not even looking into the juggle.

[C]

Indians love to talk.

[D]

So before we left, I had chugged a few chai teas because I was and am obsessed with them. Rookie mistake. Didn't go pee before we got on this truck. It's about this time that I realize I have to pee so insanely bad. My eyes are watering. Like, there's tears streaming down my face and I've been clenching for the past 20 minutes. This truck is not slowing down. Like, we're just flying, bumping like crazy. And the guides really don't speak much English. I'm super shy, like, there's not a chance in hell. I'm waving them down to be like, hey, can you stop the truck? Just let me get off. I'll just go pee on the side of the road. But I did know that we were eventually going to stop for a bathroom and snack break at the halfway point. So I'm just squeezing for dear life until then. And so we're continuing on. No stopping in sight, still flying. Every bump is really unbearable. And I'm starting to feel that familiar tension building in the downstairs region.

[B]

Wow, wow, wow. So you recognize that? It's like, wow, this Is transferred into a mix of pain and a bit of pleasure.

[D]

Yes. Combination of the bumps. Full bladder. Three weeks of not being able to release. Apparently reading the Time Traveler's Wife, just being a very horny teenager.

[B]

The thought of tigers maybe, too.

[C]

That's what I thought.

[D]

I'm realizing what is about to happen, and I feel like I have no control over the situation.

[B]

Yeah. Wow.

[C]

What?

[B]

Wow.

[D]

And so I don't know about you, Monica, but when I have a full bladder, I can have, like, insanely intense orgasms and very quickly.

[B]

Monica's never had a full bladder.

[C]

That is true. I don't drink enough water to have a full bladder.

[D]

Hack. I sometimes don't always pee before sex.

[C]

I have heard this.

[D]

This was where this whole tip started. But suddenly it hits. It's honestly, I think, the strongest orgasm I've had in my entire life.

[B]

Oh. Oh. Like, to the point where you need to get vocal.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Yeah. I'm not one to orgasm subtly. I'm usually, like, very, very flushed. I have a hard time being quiet. So at this point, I'm just trying not to make eye contact with the families across from me who are staring at me. Trying not to touch my brother or dad who are sitting very close to me. This goes on for at least 30 seconds.

[B]

Wow. It's the orgasm of your life.

[D]

It literally was. I'm still trying to reach that kind of high again.

[C]

Do you think part of it because it was.

[B]

You're trying to not.

[D]

I think so. The tension was just so high. I'm bright red. Like, I can tell my face is on fire. I'm shaking. Like, I'm vibrating.

[B]

Sure, sure.

[D]

I'm definitely being audible. I'm gasping. I'm really trying. I'm just looking down.

[C]

Wow. Are you moving your body?

[B]

Writhing.

[D]

I was more, like, shaking. So my dad turns to me.

[B]

Oh, no.

[D]

And he's literally, like, horrifying. Are you okay? Like, what's happening? It's obvious. I'm having sex. Some kind of medical incident. Like, everyone is staring at this point.

[B]

Oh, my goodness.

[D]

And so I see my parents look at each other out of the corner of their eye, and I swear they're thinking, like, did that just happen? Because I'm not responding. I'm just sitting there. I'm looking down. I'm trying to gather myself.

[B]

Sure, you need a cigarette?

[D]

I'm just sitting there, trying to process the fact that I just had a 10 out of 10 orgasm next to my dad and brother and mom and while 15 other people watch me. So I'm Praying a tiger jumps out of the jungle at this point to take eyes off me. Like, this is horrendous.

[C]

Did you still have to pee after that?

[D]

Yes. I was gonna say, the story doesn't quite stop there. I'm sitting in my post orgasm shame for probably another 15 minutes or so. When we finally get to the midway point of this tour, I'm clenching for dear life. So excited because I know there's gonna be a bathroom here. So we pull up still just in the middle of the jungle and there's with this little cement structure. So I'm like, okay, thank God. There's the bathrooms. I try to, like, subtly make my way over there. I'm speed walking, get to the bathrooms. It's just three cement walls with open back just facing to the jungle. And I go in and it's just a little drain in the middle. And there's no roof, so you can kind of hear everything going on. So I make it to the bathroom first as I was speed walking over there. So by the time I'm in there, the entire truck is now lined up to use this washroom because people probably similarly to me were dying on this bumpy truck. And so it turns out I had been clenching so hard that I literally could not relax my pelvic floor. Like, it was stuck.

[C]

And you're squatting. It's not like you can relax your muscles. Exactly.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

And the back is open to tigers.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Nothing about this is a calm situation. I hear the people out there. I've been in there for way too long already. Probably going on five minutes. I hear my mom, she's like, are.

[E]

You okay in there, honey?

[B]

Oh, as if that's ever helped with anything.

[D]

Absolutely not. And I know that if I push any harder, it could be possibly a Hannes situation.

[F]

Oh, sure.

[B]

All those chai teas.

[D]

Yeah. I gave up and I had to get back on the truck.

[F]

No.

[D]

For an hour drive back.

[C]

What?

[D]

It was excruciating. This was the worst hour of my entire life. I get back to the hotel, pee for what felt like five minutes. Did have a bit of a Tonka situation. So thank God didn't push any harder.

[B]

Sure, sure, sure, sure.

[C]

Wow. I'm glad you made it.

[B]

Oh, you had so much happening in your low.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

Maybe your mom and brother and dad.

[B]

Thought you shit yourself.

[C]

Right.

[D]

That could have been it.

[B]

And then luckily you were in the can forever. So they're like, oh, yeah. She.

[C]

That reinforces that it was that.

[D]

I'm going to lock that away in my Mind that that's what they think. And we'll. We'll go with that.

[F]

Yeah.

[B]

I guess I can only say as a parent, like my thought of my parents seeing me orgasm is absolutely a nightmare. Now, conversely, your kids are just these dumb things. Everything's whatever. You clean their po. I promise, even if they did think it, they're not like, oh, she's a pervert. You're just like, oh, this is new. Kind of like the time she pooped up her back of her clothes in her diaper.

[D]

Definitely worse. From my perspective, what I think could.

[B]

Have more likely happened is that you could have developed in that moment a very interesting kink. Because your greatest orgasm was in public being stared at and being shamed. Like, I could imagine this turning into some weird kink.

[C]

I could too.

[E]

Did it?

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

No. I am still so mortified. Being that this is the second time I'm speaking this out loud.

[C]

I thought it was gonna be that a tiger appeared.

[B]

Oh, and you sprayed.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You just got so excited and into it. It was so majestic. And tigers are hot.

[F]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

And feisty.

[B]

And solitary. They're unavailable because they're solitary.

[C]

Yeah, that's right.

[B]

You know, they'll never really link up with you.

[D]

Happy ending to the story. The boy I was trying to get with before the trip did lose my virginity to him and he's now my husband.

[B]

Oh, my God. You're married to the guy who. Wow.

[D]

I also just want to say thank you both. You've changed mine and my husband's life by introducing us to Emily Burger. It's now an obsession. We might be the only two people who talk about it more than you guys.

[B]

Oh, wonderful. Where did you get it? New York.

[D]

Yes. Planning a weekend trip back there just so we can go eat there. I'm also gluten free because of autoimmune, but it was the one time I've cheated in eight years and it was so worth it.

[B]

I agree. That's the place. I'll do it. That pretzel bun. Oh, well, Easter egg. We are gonna have Emily on. So maybe we'll get to find out how she stumbled upon that recipe. So nice meeting you. That's a great story. Just loved it.

[D]

Great meeting you guys. Monica, congrats on Beth Stead. Just binge the first two episodes this morning. I'm hooked.

[B]

Oh, good.

[C]

Thank you so much. It gets way more twisted.

[D]

Can't wa.

[B]

All right, well, take care. Have a great rest of your day.

[D]

Bye.

[B]

Oh, what a great story.

[C]

Next to Your dad?

[B]

Yeah. No, not that part.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, you gotta spray when you.

[C]

Right, exactly. That's how intense it was.

[B]

What I know from that story is I've never had an orgasm that good.

[C]

Really?

[B]

Yeah, I just can tell.

[C]

Why?

[B]

Well, first of all, 30 seconds. My God, Rob, how long do yours last? 95 seconds. 95 seconds on average. We are supported by skims. You know what, Monica, I have to talk to you about these skims pajamas they sent us.

[C]

Yes, I was literally just thinking about how much I love mine. I think I've worn them every night since we got them.

[B]

Oh, yeah. I barely was able to get out of mine to come in today. So I've always been that guy who just sleeps in whatever random T shirt. You know, old shorts. These skims jammies, first of all, they're in the pattern I love. They're in the checkered red and black.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

And then the fabric is just snuggling me all night long.

[C]

It's such a good product. And also for the women's ones, the one I have is so cute. I like, after my shower, my routine to get into a cute pair of pajamas. And I feel like my. My sleep is improved when I'm wearing cute pajamas. You eventize it. That's right.

[B]

And honestly, I feel more together wearing matching pajamas instead of my usual mismatch situation.

[C]

The timing couldn't be better either because it's holiday season. And honestly, these would make incredible gifts. They have options for women, men, kids, and even pets. That's so cute. Who doesn't want to feel this comfortable?

[B]

Sleeping shop the best [e-mail] after you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you select podcast in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows. And if you're looking for the perfect gifts for everyone on your list, the Skims Holiday Shop shop is now [e-mail] We are supported by Cradelio Quatro. Every dog deserves to enjoy the outdoors and be protected from dog parasites. Cridelio quatro offers the broadest parasite protection of its kind by covering six types of parasites in one monthly flavored chewable tablet. Fighting ticks, fleas, heartworm disease, roundworms, hookworms, and tapeworms. Woof. Other products say they're all in one, but Cridelio quattro is the only monthly chewable tablet of its kind that covers three species of tapeworms. And it's flavored, which means your dog might actually like it. Whether you're going on a hike or just in the backyard, you can help protect your best buddy. Talk to your vet if your dog has a history of seizures or neurological disorders. Visit quattrodog.com for more info. Ask your vet about credelio quatro. That's quattrodog.com to learn more. For full safety information, side effects and warnings, visit credelioquatrolabel.com, consult your vet or call 1-888-545-5973. We are supported by Quints when the weather starts to turn and the holidays are coming up, I just want getting dressed to be easy. Stuff that feels good, looks sharp and actually lasts. That's why I've been into Quint's and the bonus. Quint's pieces make great gifts too.

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They really do. They've got the sweaters, but they also have homeware. You can get all of your holiday shopping done just on quints.

[B]

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[C]

I ordered some sheets, some really, really amazing sheets. They're also so cute. They're striped. I love quints and I feel like it's a hack, honestly. It's like the quality is so good and it's so reasonable.

[B]

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[C]

Hello.

[B]

Hello Dylan.

[F]

How are you?

[B]

Wonderful. Do you work in customer service? Are you a gamer? Why do you have this great headset?

[F]

I do not, but I just got this from a new laptop box. So thanks for calling that out.

[B]

Oh wow. It just came as a free accessory.

[F]

Yeah.

[B]

And Dylan, where are you?

[F]

I'm in Yellowknife, Northwest Territories, Canada.

[C]

Another Canadian. We just had a Canadian.

[B]

You Canadians like to come on accident?

[F]

I guess we do. I'm wondering if I could possibly be the most northern caller to armchair.

[B]

Anonymous how high Up. Are you. Are you on the same latitude as parts of Alaska?

[F]

Yeah. So not quite in the Arctic Circle, but close.

[B]

Oh, my goodness. And what are you doing up there?

[F]

I'm a land surveyor.

[B]

Bear. Okay, you've got the tripod, and you're out there dialing that thing in.

[F]

That's me.

[B]

Were you, like, an outdoorsy kid? Were you a boy scouty type kid? How did you get drawn to that?

[F]

Yeah, always outdoors. That's what kind of drew me to the profession.

[B]

And do you have a lot of bear encounters?

[F]

A couple polar bear stories.

[C]

That's cool.

[B]

So you have an unexpected orgasm story.

[F]

Yeah. And this is a bit of a twofer. Kind of blends in the story with some lovely prompts that you love on, I'm sure.

[E]

Anonymous.

[B]

Wonderful. This is great, great, great.

[F]

Okay, so I'll set the scene. So this was, I guess, 10 years ago now. My girlfriend at the time and her mother had just moved towns, and they had just gotten the keys to their new house. So we had decided we were going to do renovations. We were going to be painting all day. There are some tradesmen there doing some work on the house. So we get there, everything's going well, and. And I get the urge that I need to shit my pants. I need to use the bathroom now. So I'm weighing out my options. I am seeing that the plumber is now working on the toilet and is replacing that. So the toilet is on the back deck.

[B]

Okay.

[F]

This being a new town, it's a Sunday morning. Not really sure what's open.

[B]

Also, how rural is this? Do they have neighbors? Could you shit in the woods?

[F]

Great question. So I'm from a very rural area, but they just moved into, like, in.

[B]

Town limits, shitting's frowned upon in the yard.

[F]

Yeah. And new neighbors. So it's a corner lot, so streets on two sides and then back to neighbors on the other. And I'm realizing that this is a very urgent situation. A little bit of backstory pooping issues. On my life, it would go days and days and days without pooping. And then your body's like, this is happening now.

[C]

Yeah, right now.

[B]

Sounds like IBS or an opiate addiction. Either, or hopefully the first.

[F]

So I step out on the deck. I see that there's no real good spots in this new backyard to hide. I see the toilet on the deck. I'm like, well, maybe I could just. Maybe I could just do that.

[C]

Oh, my God, that feels crazy.

[B]

But better than pooping, right on the deck.

[C]

But then what? They're gonna Bring it in with.

[B]

He's gonna then take it into the grass and take a hose and spray it all up somehow without anyone knowing. Oh, I mean, who knows?

[F]

That would have been super logical. You know, you're not thinking straight at that time. So as I'm weighing out these options, I am also noticing that our elderly new neighbors are in their windows, just peeking at us and super excited to come say hi.

[B]

Oh, boy. Oh.

[F]

The only thing that I know is open being the. There's a gas station about five minutes away. I make the decision that I'm going to drive to this place or at least find somewhere where I can go do my business. As I'm running to my car, the elderly couple step outside and how's it going? You know, trying to introduce yourself and I'm sorry, you gotta go. Bye.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, okay.

[C]

Good to protect yourself.

[F]

Not the time. So I'm in the car, I'm driving, you know, radio silent, and I'm realizing this is that I'm not sure if I'm going to make it. I'm looking around, seeing if I can just pull over anywhere, and I'm not seeing much. So I just decide I'm just going to gun it to the gas station. I am clenching with everything I can. Shoulders are backed up against the seat, left foot against the floorboards, and I'm now lifted up off the seat of the car. It's dire situation. And then all of a sudden my legs start to tremble and I let out this guttural moan. My legs give out and I explode in my pants with semen.

[C]

Wait, what?

[A]

What?

[F]

I absolutely came and I was so confused.

[B]

Oh my God.

[A]

He bl.

[B]

Johnny.

[G]

This is so confusing.

[B]

He was squeezing so tight and then somehow. Wow.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Did you have the waves and sensations of pleasure?

[F]

It was an insane orgasm.

[B]

Good or bad?

[F]

Good. Oh, it was wild.

[B]

Oh, wow. Okay.

[C]

This is not that dissimilar from the last story.

[B]

She had too much yawn. She had to pee pants.

[C]

The pressure that's happening below.

[B]

Yeah, below deck.

[F]

Boy, did it build. Not only that, but I realized I think I've definitely shit my pants.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

At the same time. Sure.

[F]

Lots going on down there. However, I'm still like super clenching and realizing, like, this is not done. So gas station in sight. I'm in total shock. I'm like, what just happened to my body?

[C]

Wait, I'm sorry, I have a question really quick. So when do you think you got hard?

[F]

That's such a great question. I'm so glad you asked.

[C]

Thank you.

[F]

Not Hard or aroused in the slightest bit. I would is completely shocked.

[B]

An erection free flaccid orgasm.

[G]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Wow. Wow, that's cool.

[F]

Should be studied.

[C]

That's an anomaly.

[F]

Yeah. So I continue driving, still realizing that this is not over. I realize I have to go to the attendant, like at the front of the gas station, ask for the key. I'm like pulling down my sweater in the front of my jeans. I'm like crouching over. Probably looked more obvious. Realizing now, is it a 16 year old boy?

[C]

Oh man, Couples off the key.

[F]

I'm hastily running into the bathroom because it's still a dire situation and I don't even shut the stall door when I absolutely destroy their bathroom and pull down the pants and realize that yep, full of come and fair bit of shit in there as well.

[C]

Oh my God, what a visual.

[F]

So I did the only thing possible, which was to lie and tell my girlfriend that I wasn't feeling well. Well, I threw my underwear out and I drove home in silence for 45 minutes questioning what just happened.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, because you're 16, you're really liable to be afraid of any like, oh, you're always waiting to find out there's something defective about you.

[C]

Oh my God, I'm a weirdo. Just will betray us at any moment or reward us. No, no, because sitting in your car isn't fun.

[B]

No, but the spraying.

[C]

I know, but it's like how did my body just do that without my permission?

[B]

Yeah. Now we're getting into some real familiar territory for you. Ptsd. Oh, Dylan, what a lovely. Yeah, double whammy.

[C]

Thanks for sharing.

[F]

Thank you so much. This is so cool that I'm getting the chance to talk to you guys. This is incredible. My sister loves Armchair Anonymous. We talk about them every week. And I didn't tell her I'm doing this shout out. See when she pieces it together.

[B]

Well, it's great meeting you, brother. I'm delighted there's someone at the top of the world listening to the show. It's kind of exciting. Be careful with the polar bears.

[F]

Will too. Take care. Bye. Bye.

[C]

Hello?

[D]

Can you hear me?

[B]

Beautifully. Is it Kylie?

[E]

It is.

[B]

Where are you at, Kylie?

[E]

I'm in San Marcos, Texas, right outside of Austin. Pretty sure that's where Monica almost drowned.

[B]

Yes, we tubed there. San Marcos River. Are you from there?

[E]

I've lived here for about 15 years.

[B]

And do you love it? Do you recommend it?

[E]

10 out of 10 recommend San Marcos river is the best river in the world.

[B]

Yeah, I've tubed it like Four or five times, I think. Think it's so delightful and it's warm.

[E]

Yeah, it's 72 degrees in the water every day of the year. And then Texas is just hot all the time.

[B]

Oh, beautiful. So already, you know, you are a very kind looking, sweet looking person. I would even say, just at first glance, maybe even shy. So this is really incredible that you're willing to share this story with us. It's very admirable.

[E]

Thanks, y'.

[B]

All.

[E]

I appreciate you giving me the opportunity.

[C]

Are you shy?

[B]

Shy, yeah. When I get that wrong, I wouldn't.

[E]

Say I'm normally shy. I think talking about this is a little out of my comfort zone. A couple people really strongly recommend I don't use my real first name, but.

[D]

I'm going for it.

[B]

Oh, good job. Okay, well, you've heard our previous one, right? Aren't these so life affirming? Like they just make you happy, these stories generally.

[E]

Totally. I went back and re listened to them and it gave me some confidence.

[B]

Okay, great. Set the scene for us.

[E]

Okay, so I grew up in Des Moines, Iowa, and I was a horse girl through and through. Loved riding horses. Started when I was a little girl taking lessons at the barn. I'd worked out a deal with the barn where I could feed and muck stalls on the weekends to help pay for my lessons. My dad was a schoolteacher, my mom was a nurse. So we didn't have tons of extra income to support this very expensive habit. But they were able to scrape it together to get me this discount right off the track, thoroughbred. And I was really excited.

[F]

Oh, wow.

[E]

My friends had these fancy imported warmbloods, but I was happy with my guy.

[B]

And aren't those racehorses, they're real twitchy and kind of erratic? No, it takes a lot to ride one of those successfully, big time.

[E]

And this one hadn't been trained very well. All he knew how to do was go really fast. So in the winters, it's really snowy in Iowa, so we're not able to ride outside, so we get switched to the indoor arena. And one of the things our trainers do during our lessons is take our saddles away from us sometimes just to help work on building stability, balance, create good core engagement. In the winters, we would just kind of get in that routine of not riding with saddles. So one winter day, I go to the barn. It wasn't for a lesson. It was just a normal training ride. And I wanted to be a good student. So I was like, you know what? We'll forego the saddle I've got this. When you're riding, there's a few different. There's the really gentle walk, pretty self explanatory. Then you go into a trot, which is a lot bouncier, not super comfortable when you have a saddle. Definitely not comfortable when you don't have a saddle. And then there's the canter, which is this really nice kind of loping gait. My horse, the retired racehorse that he was, he was always wanting to go as fast as he could during this. So it was this like push, pull kind of dynamic between the two of us. Us. But we get into the canter, it's going great. He's pulling a little bit. I start to notice these kind of spasms in my abdominals. I don't think too much of it. Bring him back to a walk, take a little bit of a breather. Then we get back into it. We're cantering. He's trying to go fast, bring him back. We get into this good flow and these spasms are getting a little bit more intense, a little bit more sensational. And they start going a little further south. Like what you guys would call pqs. Yeah, I'm experiencing the pqs.

[B]

Can I ask quickly your backstory at this age? You'd had orgasms already or no? No, no.

[F]

Okay.

[B]

I think that's an important detail.

[F]

Yeah.

[C]

It's like, what's going on?

[B]

So you're not. You're not very familiar with all the stuff that's happening?

[E]

No, I was not sure what was going on. I liked it.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

Wasn't sure what was about to happen. And so as I'm feeling these sensations, I'm starting to squeeze him tighter, which indicates. Indicates to him to go faster.

[B]

Oh, wow.

[E]

So he's going faster and I'm feeling more sensation and more sensation.

[B]

Oh, my God. What will give?

[E]

And then I just remember the world starts to get spotty and then dark. And I can feel my eyes rolling into the back of my head and my mouth is open and I'm for sure making a noise.

[C]

Wait, are you by yourself?

[G]

Yeah.

[B]

How visible are you to the coach?

[E]

This wasn't a lesson, thankfully, but my friend was there, and I bring my horse back to a walk. I feel this intense sensation of wetness. He's just looking at me like, you good? I'm like, these guys just had an orgasm.

[C]

Okay, good.

[B]

So did you know?

[F]

Yeah.

[B]

Was it obvious to you once it happened, like, oh, that was an orgasm for sure.

[E]

I was like, that's what it had to have been. But I think there were two things that work. I think the stimulation of not having the saddle, but also having the core engagement, the squeezing of the abdominal muscles. I think that at 15, I was really shown, like, what a double orgasm was.

[C]

W. That is so exciting.

[B]

And do you think your friend had any idea or they missed it?

[E]

I was like, making noises. She for sure knew something was.

[B]

Now this has got to be an incredibly common occurrence, right? I've heard from many women who ride horses that they've had orgasms on the horse. Is it kind of like standard? Have you seen anyone else have one?

[E]

I haven't talked to anybody else that has. I don't know if we're all super loud and proud about it.

[F]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

I do think the bareback factor, though, really added more to this now.

[B]

So if I'm you and I'm 15 and I have that experience, I'm like, when are we riding again?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Did you want that to happen again and again?

[E]

I knew the addict in you. Yeah, you knew so, so often growing up, the middle school and high school guys would be like, do you fuck your horse?

[B]

Oh, eye roll, you know?

[E]

So I think that I didn't want to be, like, too much of a horse girl.

[B]

So you're a little nervous to actually commit to that.

[C]

Well, you don't want that to be your identity girl that fucks horses.

[B]

But there's a big difference between riding a horse and having an accidental orgasm.

[C]

Kind of a small difference.

[B]

You think it's a small dog? I think it's a pretty material difference.

[C]

So exciting. Did it ever happen again?

[E]

It didn't happen again. It was a one and done. I'm glad it happened, but I'm also happy that it was just once.

[C]

Did you feel a little like next time you saw the horse, you felt like you didn't want to, like, look at him.

[B]

Shy.

[C]

Yeah, shy.

[E]

I gave him extra treats that night. I was like, good boy.

[B]

Okay, great.

[C]

Or you, like, we're really simpatico. We work really well together.

[B]

You're kind of asking if she fell in love with the horse afterwards.

[E]

He set the standard for me. I'll say that. Like, level up, gentlemen.

[C]

Yeah, that's right.

[B]

Did he bite people? They're really high strung, those racehorses. No. Or is that a stereotype?

[E]

He didn't bite people. But there was definitely a time the barn was getting fed while I was taking him out for a lesson. And he was pointed at the bar. And as I was getting on him, he just ran through the fence. Splintered the fence and went right back into his stall to eat his dinner.

[B]

All right. Yeah. So explosives. That's what you want in a racehorse. Well, Kylie, that's a very innocent and cute story. I loved that.

[F]

Yeah.

[C]

And that was very exciting.

[B]

And Monica would have been in love with the whores.

[C]

Well, yeah.

[E]

Can I do a quick shout out?

[B]

Oh, you can do it to.

[E]

I want to do a shout out to my soulmate Kelly and Taylor Goodman. They're both big armchairs and excited that I get to talk to you guys today. And then, Dax, I'm in recovery. And day seven came out when I was really coming to terms with how dangerous and toxic my drinking was. I just want to say thank you so much for being so open and transparent. The biggest thing that you did for me was you really gave me hope. Hope that there was a beautiful life on the other side of addiction. I saw that you were successful and you had a family and friends and just this beautiful life that I didn't think I would ever have access to and that I didn't deserve. And so I just can't thank you enough for being a beacon of hope to all of us that have experienced the turmoil and tragedy of addiction.

[B]

Oh, man. Thank you. My pleasure. That's wild. I'm happy it helped me. Helped you? How long have you been sober?

[E]

Almost a year.

[B]

Awesome.

[E]

I had some time stacked up, and then I tried it one more time.

[B]

Gonna do it like a lady this time.

[E]

Still wasn't great.

[B]

Still wasn't a lady about it.

[F]

Yeah.

[B]

Every guy, you know, his big fantasy is like, he'll be able to drink a glass of wine like a gentleman.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

So he's like, associated somehow. You'll do it very classy.

[E]

Two bottles later, you're like, wait, that was not the plan.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

When I'm asking the 80 year old bartender at the VFW if he knows where to get coke. Oh, I guess I wasn.

[C]

I also wasn't exactly gentlemanly. Well, that's awesome. Congratulations.

[B]

Yeah. So nice meeting you. Thanks for saying that.

[E]

Thanks so much, y'.

[D]

All.

[E]

I appreciate it. Bye.

[B]

Bye. I want to go ride a horse now.

[C]

I liked that, but I'm not into riding horses.

[B]

Right. You're scared of them.

[F]

Yeah.

[C]

They kick you and you. Internal bleed.

[B]

Yeah. If you get behind them a lot.

[C]

Well, if you fall off, that's how happens a lot.

[B]

They come around and turn on.

[C]

No, they kick you. This is real horse.

[B]

You mean step on you and they.

[C]

Freak out and they're like doing.

[A]

They.

[C]

You know, they Move their legs around, then you're on the ground. Like, you know when you asked if they bit anyone?

[F]

Yeah.

[C]

That also could be part of the falling in love with it though, because some people like biting in sexual activity. It came up yesterday because we were talking about necks. I think necks are very attractive and you kind of want of like put your mouth on it.

[B]

You want to nibble it a little bit. Yeah. Chum chom chomp. We are supported by better help. You know what's wild? October 10th is World Mental Health Day. And it got me thinking about all the incredible therapists out there making a real difference. Better Help therapists alone have helped over 5 million people worldwide. That's a lot of lives changed, one conversation at a time.

[C]

I love my therapist so much. I saw her twice last week after my personal tragedy. She was so helpful in helping me process everything.

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Yeah, Finding the right therapist can feel overwhelming. But better help makes it simple. They've spent 12 plus years perfecting their match system, connecting people with licensed professionals from their network of over 30,000 therapists. And with an average session rating of 4.9 out of 5 based on over 1.7 million client reviews, they're clearly doing something right. This World Mental Health Day, we're celebrating the therap who have helped millions of people take a step forward. If you're ready to find the right therapist for you, BetterHelp can help you start that journey. Armchairs get 10% off their first month at betterhelp.comDax that's BetterHelp. H E L P.comDax we are supported by Addie.

[C]

I know about Addie. The little pink pill, right?

[B]

Yes, that's right. Addi is the FDA approved pink pill clinically proven to boost desire in certain premenopausal women, women who are bothered by a low libido.

[C]

I love this. It's really nice that there's an option out there for women who are dealing with low desire. And I like that. Addie's non hormonal and created by a woman for women. Addie is helping women feel like themselves again. And that's really important.

[B]

It really is. So arm cherries. If your libido could use a little jump start, Addie's got you covered. Learn [e-mail] that's a D D Y I.com use code DAX for a ten dollar telemed [e-mail] Addi or flibanserin is for premenopausal women with acquired generalized hypoactive sexual desire disorder. HSDD who have not had problems with low sexual desire in the past who have low sexual desire. No matter the type of sexual activity, the situation, or the sexual partner, this low sexual desire is troubling to them and is not due to a medical or mental health problem, problems in the relationship or medicine or other drug use. Addy is not for use in children, men, or to enhance sexual performance. Your risk of severe low blood pressure and fainting is increased if you drink standard alcohol drinks. Close in time to your ADDI dose. Wait at least two hours after drinking before taking Addi at bedtime. This risk increases if you take certain prescriptions, OTC or herbal medications, or have liver problems and can happen when you take Addi without alcohol or other medicines. Do not take if you are allergic to any of Addi's ingredients. Allergic reactions may include hives, itching or trouble breathing. Sometimes serious sleepiness can occur. Common side effects include dizziness, nausea, tiredness, difficulty falling asleep or staying asleep, and dry mouth. C Full PIM Medication guide including box [e-mail] PI Addie use code DAX for a $10 telemed [e-mail] that's a d d y I.com this podcast is brought to you by Squarespace, the all in one website platform designed to help you stand out and succeed online. The website for Armchair expert I was too afraid to try. I didn't want to build it. I didn't think I had the skill set. But Ron Bob got on there. He made the most beautiful website for us and he said it was incredibly easy. You do not have to be tech savvy.

[C]

They have a really cool feature. It's called the Blueprint AI feature and you basically tell it what you're trying to do. Like in our case, showcase the podcast obviously host our archive, that kind of thing, and it builds you a custom website that actually looks really legit.

[B]

Well, the other thing that's been crucial for us is their SEO tools. Look, I don't even know what SEO meant when we started, but it's basically what helps people find you online. Squarespace handles all that technical stu automatically so you don't have to think about it. It's all pretty straightforward and it actually works, which is really all I care about at the end of the day. So head to squarespace.comdax for a free trial and when you're ready to Launch, use code DAX to save 10% on your first purchase of a website or domain. Hello.

[D]

Oh hi.

[B]

And I see your name is in quote so is that a Fake name you've already supplied or do we got to come up with one for you?

[A]

I've supplied Cynthia.

[B]

Okay. I appreciate that. A lot of people make us do the work for them. I had to name someone Betsy earlier today.

[A]

Oh, did you?

[F]

Yeah.

[B]

And is Cynthia someone in your life that you like? We find that that's often what people do when they pick a fake name.

[C]

Or you don't like.

[A]

Actually, it was the name my dad wanted to call me.

[B]

Oh, it is. Okay.

[A]

I always say I'm glad we didn't, cuz I think if my nickname was Sin, my life could have took a whole new direction.

[B]

Oh, right, sure, yeah, that would be an easy nickname to call, come up with. And where are you, Cynthia?

[A]

I'm in Canada.

[B]

Get out of here. We're three for four.

[C]

Yeah, three for four. Canadians.

[B]

You Canadians like to unexpectedly orgasm? We now have enough data.

[C]

That is enough. Yeah, yeah.

[B]

A sample of four. So please set the scene for us, Cynthia.

[A]

Okay. This all started eight years ago. I drive to work every morning. It's a 45 minute drive. I enjoy driving. And I always have to pass over a train track. This one day I passed over the train track and it felt a little better than normal. So I pass over it and that led to what I'd like to call a unexpected celebration.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And I'm thinking, okay, what's happening here? You know, I thought maybe it was menopause. My hormones are fluctuating, so I kind of go on my way. And a couple days later, same thing happened.

[B]

After the first time, as you approach the railroad tracks, are you starting to already get a little titillated, like it could happen again?

[A]

No, just enjoying the drive, having my tea, relaxing and. And I thought maybe I was tense. So I just tried to relax as much as I could and the same thing happened.

[B]

And Cynthia, is it a full orgasm or it is the hints of an orgasm?

[A]

No, it led up to a full one.

[B]

Wow, what a blessing.

[C]

How big of a track.

[A]

Well, the first time I kind of want to back up, go forward, back up and go forward. It was exciting.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But what's it happening again? I'm like, oh, something's going on here. So I was a little nervous, more so I thought, should I pull off to the side of the road, what should I do? So no, I thought, you know, I'm a woman, I could multitask. There's no one on the highway. I should be good. A couple weeks pass and my ex husband and I are gone out to watch some music. It's a little dive bar that has some really great local music. Place is dark, and without warning, we're sitting there and I have a full blown.

[B]

No.

[C]

Out of nowhere.

[A]

Yes. Not even a hint of anything. I'm like, what the is happening to me? I was really freaked out.

[B]

You were scared something was wrong with you. Maybe medically.

[E]

Yeah.

[F]

Yeah.

[A]

That's when it was. This is not just hormonal fluctuation here. So I looked at my ex. He didn't even know what to do, what to say. And I said, I have no idea where that came from or how that happened. Luckily, it was dark, the music was loud, and I wasn't in front of anybody.

[E]

Yes.

[C]

Oh, my God.

[B]

He detected it.

[A]

Well, yeah. Yes, he did. And I thought, okay, I need to get to the doctor. So you don't get it the next day with doctor support appointments. So I had to wait a little bit while I was waiting for my appointment. I think it was like a week or four days. We decided to go curling. I've only been twice in my life.

[B]

Can we just say really quick, for the folks not familiar with curling, this is a thing you've seen in the Olympics. There's a huge stone that gets slid down ice and there's little brooms. And you're going next to it, right?

[A]

Yeah. I'd equate it to shuffleboard, but on ice. So anyway, one of our teammates were talking and stuff. He comes up from behind me, puts his hand on my shoulders, and I feel another one.

[B]

Oh, wow, wow, wow.

[A]

So I twist around really quickly and I lose my footing on the ice and I fall down. But I caught myself enough. Looks like I'm just doing a push up, you know, I just caught myself about 5cm from my nose planting on the ice. So I'm totally discombobulated. It's not dark. There's no music. I can't hide this.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But the whole idea of me falling, I think shocked my body somehow. So everybody, you know, oh, are you okay? You okay? And I'm like, okay. They're concentrating on that. That's perfect. Perfect. And I have to make up a bit of an excuse. I said, yep, I'm fine, just not feeling really great. So I think I'm going to set the rest of the game out. They don't think anything of it. They just think, okay, she slipped. And I can be known the odd time to be clumsy. My doctor's appointment's coming. I go to the doctor now. My doctor is very abrupt. She's 83 she's probably 84 or 85 this year.

[B]

She's running out of time.

[A]

Yeah. She comes in and says okay, what can I help you with today? And I break into tears cuz I have to tell her. And I feel a lot of shame over this.

[B]

Yes. Uhhuh. Just so stupid. But yeah, very human.

[A]

Oh yeah, I know, I feel like a freak. I kept saying what is going on with me? I tell her I have involuntary orgasms.

[B]

Right.

[A]

And she looked at me in shock and she said oh my God, don't tell anybody that, they'll laugh at you. Uhoh.

[C]

Oh, that's a. Okay.

[A]

You have to know the doctor. That's what I expected from, from her. I said no, I don't plan on telling a lot of people.

[C]

Right, sure.

[A]

She says, I'll make some referrals for you. We go three years, it's very hard to find somebody to help with this. I've gone on the Internet, I've contacted some people, but they just said we only do the research in it, we're not doctors, we can't help you.

[B]

And are you finding though in your Internet searches that there are other people that have this condition? Is that happening? And if so, is that comforting at all?

[A]

What I found out was that it says there was only 4% of women.

[B]

Have this more than I was a thought.

[A]

Yeah, I had to take some time off work. I work in the public sector and searching and trying to find my own information.

[B]

Is there any part of your brain that's suggesting that maybe you just enjoy this or is that completely out of the realm of reasoning?

[A]

No, it's not enjoyable anymore.

[B]

And over that course of three years, is it happening often? Is it increasing or staying the same?

[A]

When I'm off work, I'm more relaxed then the more relaxed I, I am, the less it occurs.

[B]

Interesting. So it's like a stress response.

[A]

Yes. So I thought perhaps that's what's going on is something psychological. But it's still occurring and I really don't know what to do. My kids are worried about me because they're saying mom, you're feel like you're isolating yourself. And I said I just need to spend some time. I told him it was menopause. So then life threw me a bit of a change. My mom passes away unexpectedly. My husband and I break up two months later. And then I find out the next year that my dad has cancer and I take care of care of him. Now I bring this up because for some reason I don't know if it's just someone's looking out for me to give me a break some way. But everything kind of calmed down then, which I wouldn't expect because that was the most stressful year and a half of my entire life. I come home and I go back to work and it starts again. So I'm thinking, wow, I must find my job really stressful because this seems to be when it's happening and it gets worse. So I try to get accommodations for my work. I finally find out that what I have is called pgad, Persistent Genital Arousal Disorder.

[B]

Okay. Okay.

[A]

It's a disorder, so they're supposed to give me accommodations, but they keep saying, the lawyer said we don't have to, to fight. That would have brought a lot more stress.

[B]

And really quick, when you get this diagnosis, is there any prescription available or is there any treatment that's known for it?

[A]

No, there is a medication, but I'm having severe menopausal symptoms as well, I think at the time. So I didn't want to mess up too much with that, but I'm just happy. It's a big relief because there's a label to it.

[B]

Yes, yes, it's comforting. I'm not alone.

[A]

That's mostly how I was feeling at that time. And it just happened that the same week I find a psychotherapist the next province over. It's probably a two hour drive or so. And she says that she can see me as a patient. So I go to her the first time I drive there and she says she thinks the treatment for me is to masturbate more. And I, I said, okay, I'm single, you know, I'm not sure how much more I could do of this, but.

[C]

I'll give it my best.

[B]

By the way, no one's ever been given that homework.

[C]

I know, I know.

[B]

You need to jerk off more.

[A]

It doesn't. Get rid of it. I go to her three times. I'm not getting anywhere. $300 every time. Same week, I find a practitioner in my hometown that I've never seen before. And I call and talk to him and I said, I've been looking for eight years. I can't believe that I haven't seen you in any of my searches. And he informs me that the week before they changed their Google Analytics because people were finding him all over the world and not locally.

[B]

Oh, weird.

[A]

So he treats people from all over the world for different symptoms, not just this. So I tell him what I have. He says, yes, I've treated women that have this and he says, make an appointment and come in. So he does an exam in my abdomen, and he says, oh, you've got a lot of shit in there. And I said, oh, okay. I didn't think that had anything to.

[C]

Do with, like, literally.

[A]

Yeah, that's what I thought he meant. He said, no, you have a lot of scar tissue in there. And he said, you've had surgery on your abdomen. I said, I had a hysterectomy 22 years ago. And he says, the scar tissue is pushing down or pinching on a nerve that's leading to your vagina.

[B]

Your clitoris, specifically. Probably, yes.

[A]

And that's what's causing the orgasms.

[C]

Wow.

[B]

It was mechanical. Yeah.

[A]

I just felt like this guy was my new best friend. So anyway, we had treatment. Now the treatment is shockwave therapy. It's a gadget that he can hold in his hand. But the treatment is like a jackhammer. It's breaking it up. I guess they use the same therapy to break gallstones now.

[B]

Inappropriate question, but feels on topic.

[A]

Look what we're talking about here.

[B]

Do you ever orgasm while the jackhammer is happening? Okay. Because you'd be hitting the scar tissue that's hitting the nerve. And now we got replacement. Repetitive jackhammering.

[A]

Good question. It's very painful. I've had two children. I said, this feels like labor. He says, yeah, that's what a lot of women say.

[B]

And how long would these sessions be?

[A]

An hour. And that's why there would be a week break. I'm not sure if it's six or eight times I did it. It got less painful as we went because there was less there. Finally, I got rid of it. I felt, I guess, what it feels like to be reborn or something. That's one of the reasons I want to tell the story, because I said, yeah, I HEAR it's only 4% of women here. He says, oh, no, it's much more than that. People are just too embarrassed. He treats women I don't know how often, but he says, I've been doing this for years.

[B]

And is it generally that situation where there's some kind of scar tissue, or could it run a gamut of causes?

[A]

No. He asked me the first question was, have you had surgery in your abdomen? So that's usually what it is.

[C]

Oh, my God. How interesting.

[B]

Oh, this is fascinating. This one got medical in the most interesting way. Yeah.

[C]

Hopefully this helps somebody.

[A]

I was really nervous because I do work in the public sector, and I don't want anybody to know who I am, but I I didn't want that to take away from the fact that if anybody could feel like, wow, that has a label, they could get treatment for it. I was told after that he treated someone that had it for 20 years. Whoa. Her outlook on sex was that she never even wanted to go near it again because she didn't have the pleasure of it.

[B]

It was more the annoyance of it.

[F]

Yeah.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Well, Cynthia says it was kind of a public service announcement.

[C]

Yes, exactly.

[A]

I just want to help somebody, not feel alone.

[B]

So how long have you been free of this?

[A]

Just since the summer.

[B]

Oh, no kidding.

[C]

Okay, great.

[A]

Back to work full time. No issues. I can concentrate on my day and what's in front of me and enjoy my life.

[B]

Probably gives you so much anxiety. Just like, oh God, I'm going to this function. Is it going to happen here or I'm going to be with my kids, Is it going to happen there? Yeah, probably be a ton of anxiety.

[A]

I actually didn't go very far. That's why my kids were saying, mom. I had to tell them because they were getting really worried about me and they thought I was really depressed. I was in my room a lot because I thought, I don't even want to be by anybody, especially my children.

[C]

Right.

[B]

That's probably the last thing you want to do. Wow.

[C]

Thank you so much for sharing.

[B]

Incredible story.

[F]

Yeah.

[B]

Thank you.

[A]

You're welcome. It's really nice meeting you guys.

[B]

Yeah, you too. Stay warm up in Canada and happy holidays.

[A]

All the best.

[B]

Take care. Wow.

[C]

You really learned something big.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Pegasus bad. It makes sense.

[B]

It certainly does.

[C]

Wild.

[B]

I still have a hard time not being jealous of it. I recognize it would be inconvenient.

[C]

It would be bad if you were like at your kids school.

[B]

Oh yeah. In the middle of an interview and I just had to be like, like you guys would all know but the guests would never.

[C]

But then we'd have to. Because the guests would be like, he has pegan.

[B]

Oh Jesus.

[C]

And then we have to tell her.

[B]

But then they'd be like, are you damp now? It's best that they don't know cuz they're going to know. Like are you damp now?

[C]

I don't want them to ask about dam.

[B]

I don't either.

[D]

Can men get ped?

[B]

I hope. No, no. I want to jinx myself. I'm a little on the fence.

[F]

Yes, man can get it.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Oh.

[C]

So for anyone listening, if this is happening, you got scar tissue, bro.

[B]

You're going to have to go up to Canada for treatment. But that's okay. It's a great place to visit.

[C]

Yeah, absolutely.

[B]

All right. Well, that was sincere, sensational.

[C]

Yeah, yeah. For another great one in the books.

[B]

There'll be a third for sure. All right. Love you.

[E]

Love you.

[B]

Do you want to sing a tune or something with a theme song? Oh, okay, great. We don't have a song for this new show, so here I go, go, go. We're gonna ask some random questions and with the help of cherries, we'll get some suggestions on the fly. Rhyme dish on the flyer. Rhyme dish.

[A]

Enjoy.

[B]

Follow Armchair Expert on the Wondry app, Amazon Music, or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to every episode of Armchair Expert early and ad free right now by joining Wonder plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts. Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short [e-mail] Survey. Survey.

[G]

Mom and dad. Mom and Mom. Dad and dad. Whatever. Parents. Are you about to spend five hours in the car with your beloved kids this holiday season? Driving old granny's house? I'm setting the scene. I'm picturing screaming, fighting back to back hours of the K Pop Demon Hunter soundtrack on repeat. Well, when your ears start to bleed, I have the perfect thing to keep you from rolling out of that moving vehicle. Something for the whole family. He's filled with. With laughs. He's filled with rage. The OG Green Gronk. Give it up for me, James Austin Johnson as the Grinch. And like any insufferable influencer these days, I'm bringing my crew of lesser talented friends along for the ride with a list guests like Gronk, Mark Hamill, and the Jonas Brothers, whoever they are. There's a little bit of something for everyone. Listen to Tis the Grinch Holiday Podcast wherever you get your podcasts.