Emily & Matt Hyland (Emily Burger)

Summary

Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard – Emily & Matt Hyland (Emily Burger)

Episode Date: April 8, 2026
Guests: Emily Hyland and Matt Hyland
Overview:
This episode dives into the dynamic partnership—both personal and professional—between Emily and Matt Hyland, co-founders of the acclaimed Emily, Emmy Squared, and Pizza Loves Emily restaurants. Over the past decade, their names have become synonymous with one of New York’s most lauded burgers and innovative approaches to pizza. The conversation weaves through their beginnings, rapid expansion, the burden and joy of family business, the strains that led to their divorce, and how they've continued to operate together while building new, independent lives.

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MAIN THEME

Building and Breaking—And Rebuilding—Through Food and Partnership
In a characteristically vibrant and honest discussion, Emily and Matt Hyland open up about how their marriage and business were built together, how the intensity of “startup-life” coupled with differing personal aspirations led to strife and eventually divorce, and how mutual respect enabled them to keep creating and collaborating even after their relationship shifted. The episode explores:

• The inspiration and ethos behind their restaurants
• Their approach to culinary innovation (especially pizza and the iconic burger)
• Navigating personal identity inside a “brand” tied to their relationship
• The emotional and logistical complexity of remaining business co-owners after their marriage
• Personal healing, reinvention, and the meaning of creative and literal “shared custody”

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EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS & KEY SEGMENTS

Meeting, Early Days & Inspiration

03:27 – 05:00

• Emily and Matt bring gifts—homemade sauce, bonbons, and Emily’s new poetry book.
• Both grew up in New York; discuss the culture shock and food scene differences with LA.
• Restaurant Count: Matt notes there are about “30 Emmy Squareds” now (05:00).
• Emily: “We still co-own and operate the original Emily in Brooklyn.”
• The burger at the West Village location is discussed—how it’s evolved over time.

Family Backgrounds & College Love Story

07:27 – 10:36

• Emily emerges from a family of educators; Matt’s parents were both transportation analysts at Standard and Poor’s.
• They meet at Roger Williams in Rhode Island; Emily was Matt's RA.
• First “date” involved eating pizza together on a dorm room floor.
• “Pepperoni and olives is my olives.” – Matt (09:42)

Entering Food & Hospitality

10:09 – 13:20

• Matt considered dropping out to attend culinary school; Emily went for an MFA in Poetry.
• Matt: “The six-month program basically throws you in to get wrecked in a New York kitchen. I had no technical skills.” (11:03)
• Emily details balancing grad school, teaching yoga, and contemplating restaurant life.

Pizza, Learning, and Launching Emily

13:01 – 16:43

• Matt learns pizza from mentor Luca at Sotto Casa in Brooklyn — explains the "why" of pizza traditions, especially Neapolitan origins.
• Emily shares discovering yoga during a time of personal loss and health struggles:

  “Yoga is the quieting of all the changing states of the mind”—Emily, explaining the yoga sutras (15:55)

• The parallels between yoga’s Americanization and pizza innovation are discussed (16:52).

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Opening a Restaurant as Partners

17:18 – 23:09

• Married in 2007, opened Emily (the restaurant) in Clinton Hill in 2014.
• Emily gives up her public school teaching job and quitting school leadership path.
• Startup capital comes from small family inheritances and a Kickstarter.
• Open kitchen for “extension of home” feeling; heavy initial involvement from family.

The Iconic Burger and Menu Creation

19:58 – 24:44

• Matt’s aversion to “soupy” Neapolitan pizza: toppings all the way to the edge.
• The burger began as a staff meal “because Matt was bored of pizza.”
• The Emmy sauce was a happy accident—a blend of wing sauce and Kewpie mayo.
• Dax and Monica recall their formative experience—surprised by the high price, then declare:

  “This is the most underpriced burger I’ve ever had in my life. I would spend $55 for this burger.” – Dax (25:06)

• In year one, Emily greets every guest; Matt makes every pizza.

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Stress, Growth, & the Strain of Partnerships

25:23 – 31:34

• Working “16 hours a day”; only day off is Tuesday.
• Relationship stress mounts:

  “Not well.” – Emily and Matt, simultaneously, when asked how it was handling stress as a couple. (25:42)

• Their different skill sets (front-of-house vs. kitchen) and personalities led to friction.
• Discuss “ego stuff” and the weirdness of Emily becoming the public-facing “name” of Emily.
• The disconnect of being forced into well-defined roles for the sake of the business.

Divorce & Professional “Co-Parenting”

31:34 – 41:55

• When their marriage fell apart, the brand, built on “Pizza Loves Emily, built on our love story,” became a challenge.
• Emily: “The copy for the cookbook was due that same summer our marriage fell apart. So I’m writing our love story…” (38:41)
• Both recount their ongoing duty and pride in the original restaurant despite the pain and healing needed.
• Emily: “Now it just feels like we’re family members who had a falling out and have come back together. It feels really beautiful to co-own and operate our baby together. Every breath gets us to where we are.” (71:45)

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Growth, Scaling, and Letting Go

43:48 – 50:00

• Matt spearheads rapid business expansion, often over Emily’s objections.
• Systems implemented: conveyor ovens, streamlined menus.
• The bittersweetness of no longer being known by staff in newer locations.
• Shoutout to original team:

  “Sammy’s the burger guy. Every burger you've ever eaten has been there.” – Emily (50:28)

• Dax: “Does it feel sad?” Emily: “It just feels like a very different time and place in my life.” (50:12)

The Breaking Point & Rebuilding Personal Lives

51:55 – 59:57

• Recounting a major dispute: Emily was arrested for hitting Matt with a bag, leading to a restraining order and, ultimately, an emotional reset.
• “That moment changed my life...the restraining order was a next level of, like, boundary… And I actually met my forever husband, Jeff.” – Emily (53:17)
• The launch of Emily’s poetry collections (“Divorced Business Partners” and “My Wise Little Ghost”), dealing with grief, healing through psychedelic therapy, and reclaiming health and a new life in Santa Fe.
• Matt, meanwhile, found personal and professional renewal with chef Simone (Little Tong), a new family, and new culinary ventures in Austin.

Reflections, Closure, and Codes

71:34 – episode wrap

• They share mutual pride in what they built, despite the pain of its evolution.
• “It’s kind of like when divorced parents are at graduation…Ah, fuck, look what we did.” – Dax (72:22)
• Both reflect that their best lives have emerged after the turmoil:

  “It’s the right time for him to be back there. It feels like he’s landed at the time and place it needs him and he’s ready to help it come into the next wave of being.” – Emily (70:05)

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NOTABLE QUOTES & MEMORABLE MOMENTS

• “We had had this kind of fantasy of, like, one day we’ll open a restaurant. And the conditions in our life were so that we were like, let’s do this now. What’s the worst that happens? And now we’re sitting here with you.” – Emily (13:45)
• “The work of yoga is to quell the thinking mind. It’s not to be able to, like, do some crazy arm balance in a matching set on Instagram.” – Emily (16:21)
• “We were so broke though, we couldn’t even put tap lines in.” – Emily (18:42)
• “The burger started as something for him. That’s how it began.” – Emily (21:53)
• “And Monica...I would spend $55 for this burger.” – Dax (25:06)
• “It felt performative…and that’s not how I operated in the founding of the original.” – Emily (38:05)
• “Being a teacher really worked out for that.” – Matt, on scaling up and training staff (45:13)
• “We’re more like family members who had a falling out and have come back together.” – Emily (71:45)
• Code word for a free dessert at the original Emily:

  “Dolphin asparagus.” (73:23)

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TIMESTAMPS FOR KEY SEGMENTS

• Origins, restaurant count: 04:46–05:04
• Family backgrounds & meeting: 07:30–10:36
• Kitchen training & pizza obsession: 11:03–13:20
• Yoga’s influence: 14:17–16:43
• Funding and opening Emily: 18:09–19:03
• Burger’s invention: 21:53–22:45
• Stress and partnership strain: 25:23–26:43
• Public/private identity issues: 29:45–31:34
• Marriage ends, business remains: 31:34–41:55
• Scaling the brand: 43:48–46:13
• Staff loyalty and transition: 50:11–51:14
• Emily’s arrest and lowest moment: 51:57–54:27
• Healing, poetry, and psychedelics: 59:10–59:57
• Reflections on pride and legacy: 71:34–72:49
• Code word for dessert: 73:23–74:00

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CLOSING & CALL TO ACTION

• For two weeks after the episode, mention “Dolphin Asparagus” at Emily Original (Clinton Hill) for a free dessert.
• “You guys really made something very special…Incredibly special. That will probably outlive all of us.” – Monica and Dax (72:57)
• Emily and Matt’s respective journeys show the complications and rewards of entangling love and business, and the possibility of creative rebirth and collaboration even after dramatic personal change.

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For listeners:
This episode speaks frankly about partnership, heartbreak, and hope. It’s a compelling listen for anyone intrigued by food entrepreneurship, creative reinvention, and how relationships can lead to unexpected forms of community, meaning, and legacy.

Transcript

[Dax Shepard]

Welcome, welcome, welcome to armchair expert experts on expert. I'm Dan Shepherd. I'm joined by miniature mouse.

[Monica Padman]

Hi there, boy, y'.

[Dax Shepard]

All. You've been hearing us talking about this burger for eight long years. It's our obsession. It's our religion.

[Monica Padman]

It's our life force.

[Dax Shepard]

It's our life force. Emily burger. So today we have Emily and Matt Hyland on who started Emily loves pizza. And Emily and Emmy square and all these yummy restaurants that serve it. Emily is also a poet and an educator and a mindful movement teacher. And Matt is a chef and a restaurateur. Please enjoy Emily and Matt Hyland. We are supported by Quints. Your wardrobe should make getting dressed effortless. But building a thoughtful wardrobe can feel impossible, especially when quality outfits cost an arm and a leg. That's the beauty of Quint's. Their everyday essentials mix well from season to season and last. I've been building my collection with their pieces and it's transformed how I get dressed every day. Clothing that's rated between 4.5 and 5 stars by thousands of people. Polos, sweaters, pants and shorts made of premium materials like Mongolian cashmere and European linen without the luxury price tag.

[Monica Padman]

I have one of the beautiful cashmere sweaters. They're very soft and they're very stubborn. Stylish, chic and simple.

[Dax Shepard]

Simple, yes. Mine looks classic. You know, almost like I'm Steve McQueen or something.

[Monica Padman]

That's what you want.

[Dax Shepard]

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[Emily Hyland]

He's an.

[Monica Padman]

In.

[Dax Shepard]

Great to meet you.

[Emily Hyland]

I hope you know you've influenced me. I'm in my Jenny King.

[Monica Padman]

Cuz you look cute. Hello.

[Dax Shepard]

Hi. Good to see you.

[Monica Padman]

Did you guys get on the.

[Matt Hyland]

Yes, of course. That's what I'm sitting.

[Dax Shepard]

You already spotted.

[Emily Hyland]

Well, we have some gifts for you.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh my goodness.

[Monica Padman]

Oh my gosh.

[Dax Shepard]

Notably know if we deserve them, but we'll receive them.

[Monica Padman]

I'll take our

[Emily Hyland]

Santa Monica. Put on your cereal. Put for you guys.

[Monica Padman]

Oh my God. Amazing.

[Dax Shepard]

First of all, I just love these little squeeze bottles.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, I just wouldn't know where to purchase one. Yeah. So now you have one. You can reuse it. This is so yummy. Yeah.

[Emily Hyland]

So enjoy.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, I can't wait.

[Dax Shepard]

It's like the mustard squirter at a Coney Dog.

[Monica Padman]

It is, it is. Or like a Fuddruckers.

[Emily Hyland]

And so it's like extra meta. You have the sauce.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah, I like that.

[Monica Padman]

Exactly, exactly.

[Emily Hyland]

Can I give you the rest of our gifts? We kind of decided to. We're so honored to be here. Matt's wife is a chocolatier.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, those are awesome.

[Matt Hyland]

She made special, special bonbons. What?

[Emily Hyland]

And my new book is coming out this season and so I wanted to give one of those to each of you.

[Dax Shepard]

Are you coming from Santa Fe and you're coming from Austin?

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah.

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

You guys visit here often or not?

[Emily Hyland]

Occasionally.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Matt Hyland]

We love. LA is like one of my favorite cities. Growing up in New York, it's so different. We both grew up in New York City. Coming to LA is such a nice treat. It's like a big beautiful town with the best weather ever and great food. It's so much fun being here.

[Dax Shepard]

How often do you guys go visit these different locations? Let's start with how many Emily or Emmy or all the different iterations restaurants are there right now.

[Emily Hyland]

So we still co own and operate the original Emily Brooklyn Hill. Yeah, that's why you got the VIP reservation.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, that was the started it all our intro.

[Emily Hyland]

What are there now, 21?

[Matt Hyland]

No, I think there's more like 30.

[Emily Hyland]

30.

[Matt Hyland]

30 Emmy squareds. Not Emily's.

[Dax Shepard]

The franchise is called Emmy Square.

[Matt Hyland]

Correct.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Okay.

[Matt Hyland]

The West Village is a weird hybrid.

[Dax Shepard]

It's a hybrid, right?

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah. So the burger is a little different. We use the same sauce but it's a double patty. But yeah, Clinton Hill is definitely the original.

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

The burger at the West Village seems to me like it's evolved closer to Clinton Hill over the years. Is that at all true? There's more soupy onions now on the West Village one, which is what I like so much about Clinton Hill. But originally when I went there, they had the soupy onion.

[Matt Hyland]

Probably put a little bit less on. It has evolved. We opened 2017, so it's almost 10 years. We opened that one.

[Dax Shepard]

Right.

[Matt Hyland]

So, like, your menu changes happen and chefs come and go and things like that. But we're pretty hands off with that one. More recently, the bigger company owns that one.

[Emily Hyland]

Specifically, Matt has come back in to do some corporate chefing, but I'm a silent partner in the Emmy Squared group, so I just basically run the show over at the Original from. Fortunately, our chef and our manager are very reliable.

[Dax Shepard]

You still have to check in all the time. With this bigger business that you guys silent partners in, you get updated and stuff.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah. And since they asked me to come back to sort of consult our corporate chef and I will retrain some of the other chefs and come some new menu items. We're opening one in Greenwich, where I grew up, which is very strange.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, yeah? Connecticut.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah. Like right on Greenwich Avenue, which is

[Emily Hyland]

like a strange place from where you grew up, literally.

[Matt Hyland]

And it took over a restaurant that I went to growing up, so it's kind of cool. But we'll launch a new menu there that'll like, roll into the other 30 locations.

[Dax Shepard]

So that'll be like kind of a test kitchen for you R and D stuff.

[Matt Hyland]

And I'll be living in my mom's basement at that point. So

[Monica Padman]

full circle.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah, exact.

[Emily Hyland]

Which was the plan if the restaurant failed.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

It's nice to have that backup basement, to be honest.

[Matt Hyland]

It's full of crickets. It's great.

[Monica Padman]

You guys would open one on the east side of la Santa Monica. I'll tell you, it's another state going to Brooklyn.

[Emily Hyland]

Duly noted.

[Matt Hyland]

What I didn't know that Emily pointed out was there's one downtown in the.

[Emily Hyland]

What is it? LA Nation Life? Is that what it's called?

[Dax Shepard]

There's one downtown now?

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

How long has that been online?

[Emily Hyland]

A few years.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, no, no, one.

[Emily Hyland]

Two months.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Because when we've ordered in the past, they will deliver. I don't know why they'll deliver from Santa Monica. It's good. It's still good, but it takes a beating. Hour and a half car ride here, you gotta really be a die hard Emily Bird.

[Monica Padman]

Exactly. I'd like one On Hillhurst. I'm gonna be very specific.

[Dax Shepard]

I'd like one on Frank.

[Monica Padman]

The powers that be. Oh, my God.

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah, listen up.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, there is a building there that could use some cute stuff.

[Emily Hyland]

He'll relay it.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah, he'll relay it.

[Dax Shepard]

We'll start with you, Emily. You're from New Jersey?

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah, I am Jersey girl.

[Dax Shepard]

And what did your parents do?

[Emily Hyland]

They were teachers. My mom was a teacher of graduate students for the visually impaired. So she was a sighted person who could actually read and write in Braille, which was pretty cool.

[Dax Shepard]

How did she stumble into that? That feels very niche.

[Emily Hyland]

She did her doctorate at Columbia in special education. I don't actually know the why of that, but she felt very called towards that population. And my dad founded a charter school in northern New Jersey and was the principal of that school.

[Dax Shepard]

Did you attend that school?

[Emily Hyland]

I did not attend that school, thankfully.

[Matt Hyland]

Did they meet at Columbia?

[Emily Hyland]

They met at Columbia, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And then your parents, you started in Brooklyn but ended up in Greenwich, right?

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah. So I was born in New York City. Everyone's born at NYU, I guess in the 80s. Yeah. So then I was in Brooklyn until I was nine. And then my dad grew up in Greenwich, so we moved back up there because he was sick of living in New York City. And my mother grew up in deep Brooklyn, and we lived, like, 10 blocks from where she grew up. She traveled, obviously, but never left Brooklyn to live.

[Dax Shepard]

And what did they do?

[Matt Hyland]

They were both transportation analysts at Standard and Poor's. That's where they met.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, again, this is very fucking niche. Your mom reads Braille in their transportation.

[Matt Hyland]

Like, they specialized in airlines and trains. So my father would go up and be like, this is why we should not give them this kind of rating, like a. AAA or double A credit rating. And my mom would go up and be like, no, this is why we should. Oh, adversaries.

[Dax Shepard]

But they both worked at Standards and Poor.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah, Standard Pores S and P. And

[Dax Shepard]

they rank stuff, and they say what the quality of their debt is and stuff like that.

[Matt Hyland]

Exactly. I didn't follow in that path.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, right. So you guys meet in Rhode island at what school?

[Emily Hyland]

Roger Williams. I was Matt's ra.

[Matt Hyland]

Oh, you were?

[Emily Hyland]

I used to key into his room and steal his candy.

[Matt Hyland]

You were, like, two years younger than me.

[Emily Hyland]

I was 18.

[Matt Hyland]

I was, like, 20. I think.

[Emily Hyland]

Nobod listened to me on the floor. I was an RA for one semester after that.

[Monica Padman]

So you were a good student. You were like a Type A?

[Emily Hyland]

Still am.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Still true.

[Matt Hyland]

Drawer full of candy. That was the kind of student. I was.

[Dax Shepard]

And you were computer science major.

[Matt Hyland]

Computer science. Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, all this is hilarious. Where you end up. And then you were doing writing and sociology.

[Emily Hyland]

Oh, yeah, creative writing.

[Dax Shepard]

And when did you first meet? Literally, were you in his dorm room

[Matt Hyland]

the second week of spa? Four year old.

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah, we ate pizza together on the dorm room floor.

[Matt Hyland]

Three straight pizzas.

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah, three straight pizza meals. And then it was pretty quick.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, pepperoni and olive oil.

[Matt Hyland]

Pepperoni and olives is my olives.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, that is good.

[Matt Hyland]

That's a deep cut right there. I forgot that.

[Monica Padman]

What's yours? Do you know hers?

[Dax Shepard]

Well? No, I know what they ate on the 1st.

[Emily Hyland]

That was our first. Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, my God.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Matt Hyland]

Were you there? Man, this is incredible.

[Dax Shepard]

That's not hard to find. Okay.

[Matt Hyland]

Oh, you're right.

[Dax Shepard]

So you guys graduate in 2004. And do you already know by the time you graduate you are not gonna pursue sociology and you are not gonna pursue computer science?

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah, I was gonna drop out junior year and go to culinary school, and then my mother and Emily convinced me you're already there junior year. Why would you drop out now? Yeah, and that's obviously in retrospective. Great idea.

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah. I majored in creative writing, actually. So I wound up applying and getting into graduate school at Brooklyn College for my MFA in poetry. And then Matt got into culinary school at the Institute of Culinary Education. So we came to the city, which is unfortunately.

[Matt Hyland]

Yes, it is unfortunately. They have a campus here in Pasadena now. They're like, we gotta change our.

[Monica Padman]

That might need a rebrand.

[Dax Shepard]

Rebrand? Oh, I'm gonna read this interview with you for ice.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I was like, oh, yeah, they need a different acronym or just drop the acronym. Okay, so yeah, you guys are together 2001, you graduate 2004, and then for the next three years between 04 and 07, you're getting your master's and you're going to ICE to be an agent and throw people. What does a culinary program entail? I have no clue.

[Matt Hyland]

The one I went was only six months. It was just more of like, here's your basic skills. Just throw you into the wild and kind of get, like, wrecked in a New York City kitchen. I was passionate about cooking and food, but I had no technical skills. So I went there, I learned everything. Even, like, how to heat up the pan correctly to put the oil in. So they really start from the basic.

[Dax Shepard]

How does one heat up a pan correctly? You don't just throw it on the fucking burner.

[Matt Hyland]

No, you do.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, okay, okay.

[Matt Hyland]

But, like, you Know, it's like how hot you want it before you put your oil in. Okay, I got you nuances.

[Dax Shepard]

I was like, we're not raising slowly the temperature, are we? You want to dedicate a good 45

[Monica Padman]

an hour or you want that oil to shimmer?

[Dax Shepard]

Shimmer, shimmer.

[Monica Padman]

I know about that a little bit. Just a little bit.

[Matt Hyland]

How to clean cast irons. You know, it's always important.

[Dax Shepard]

Is there longer programs in six months?

[Matt Hyland]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

People can go for years. No?

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah. If you want to go to like, CIA upstate New York, that's another good name.

[Dax Shepard]

CIA.

[Monica Padman]

Why are they all like this?

[Dax Shepard]

CIA? Homeland Security is a great program out of.

[Monica Padman]

They specialize in omelets.

[Matt Hyland]

So yeah, you can go like four years. Like, it's actual college. But I picked the six month one because I kind of wanted to get into the restaurants while I was in culinary school. I did like, staging for a few nights in different places too.

[Dax Shepard]

What's staging?

[Matt Hyland]

You go and work for free for a night. Just see how a kitchen operates. Because every kitchen operates so differently with a different chef and different ways to prep things and cook things. So it's kind of like has a giant restaurant to it, has a tiny restaurant to it. And you kind of go for a night and just watch your service and they'll give you some onions to chop while you're doing it.

[Dax Shepard]

And then how does this interest lead you ultimately to pizza? That's where your obsession lands you, right?

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah. So, you know, it's kind of getting burned out of just regular cooking. And I took like a year off. And then you were going to school for being a principal, right?

[Emily Hyland]

I was in yoga school at that time.

[Matt Hyland]

Oh, you're in yoga school. That's right. And then this pizza place, Soto Casa, which is still there, it's on Atlantic Avenue in Smith in Brooklyn. They were just opening that week. I walk in, I was like, I don't know how to make pizza. But, like, I've always wanted to, you know, And I had experience helping open restaurants and pizza guys, like, really aren't chefs. So I could kind of come in there and help, just be like, this is a better chef y thing to do than how you just make pizza. And then Luca is like my pizza mentor.

[Dax Shepard]

He taught you the why of pizza.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

What is the why of pizza?

[Matt Hyland]

The simplicity of it. Right. Making the original form of pizza like the Neapolitan pizza was great because every pizza is a replica of that pizza. And then, like, there's a replica and then a replica, and then all of a Sudden you have, like, a Detroit pie or something. That doesn't even look like the original. It's like, why is the original. The original? How did these clones come out of it, basically?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. And why was the original. The original. The Italians were trying to accomplish what.

[Matt Hyland]

It's basically like peasant food. So the guys would get off the boats, they'd get a round red pie, they'd put their fish on it and kind of roll it up like a burrito, eat it. Like street food.

[Dax Shepard]

Right.

[Matt Hyland]

That's why marinara is called marinara sauce. It's like the seafood.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, like marine marinara.

[Monica Padman]

That's interesting. You would hate fish pizza.

[Dax Shepard]

I wouldn't with it. No.

[Monica Padman]

He's scared of fish.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. He can't get down with fish.

[Emily Hyland]

But I remember the day he came home from one of the early days at Soto Casa, and it really did feel like he put his hands on that dough, and he was like, this is what I want to do. And we had had this kind of fantasy of, like, one day we'll open a restaurant. And the conditions in our life were so that we were like, let's do this now. Let's jump in. And what's the worst that happens? And now we're sitting here with you.

[Dax Shepard]

Let's go to your yoga instruction, because that's what's happening. So you've picked up a master's and you are teaching?

[Emily Hyland]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

And then you're also learning to be a yoga instructor. Where did that interest stem from?

[Emily Hyland]

I was an athlete my whole life. I went to college to play basketball. And then I quit basketball my freshman year very quickly and discovered that trifecta of beer, pizza, pot, and gained a lot of weight was really unhealthy. And by time I got to the end of graduate school, I was very obese and really struggling and very medicated and that sort of thing. And my sister brought me to a yoga class and encouraged me. And I got there, and it was like, this is something I can do. I don't feel judged. I feel safe and held and kept showing up. And so it's been one of the biggest through lines in my life and was really the lens through which I approached the ethos of the restaurant in terms of my work with it, which I think was really valuable.

[Dax Shepard]

What would you say if you had to stereotype people that are drawn to yoga? Yeah, I've attended some yoga classes. I've probably done 20 in the last 26 years I've lived here.

[Emily Hyland]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

And there's a vibe. And I'm Curious what the connective tissue is. Sounds like it answered a whole host of things. Holistically changed your life, not just, oh, I want to get in shape. So would it be fair to say people that are drawn to it are looking for some kind of holistic experience?

[Emily Hyland]

I think it's been really appropriated and watered down in our culture. It came through California in like aerobics workout culture in the 1970s, and so it started to really become this thing that's like hot power exercise. But yeah, the physical practice is just 1:8 of what it means to practice the eight limbs path of yoga. So it is a philosophical way of living, not just posture practice. And that's been grossly misinterpreted.

[Dax Shepard]

What is it grounded in, like, what, ancient text? Or is it an offshoot of some other religion?

[Emily Hyland]

It's not a religious practice as much as a philosophical practice. So the yoga sutras of Patanjali is. Is kind of the text. It's the threads of all of the strings of what it means to practice. And it's yoga. Chittavriti nirodaha means yoga is the quieting of all the changing states of the mind. So the work of yoga is to quell the thinking mind. It's not to be able to, like, do some crazy arm balance in a matching set on Instagram, if that's an

[Dax Shepard]

added bonus of it.

[Emily Hyland]

Great, sure. Yeah. And I don't claim to be any sort of expert, but just growing in that world and trying to do my duty as a white woman of privilege who runs a yoga studio, to not be appropriating and to be aware of how I've been brought up on it and the impact it's had on me as a person has been life changing, but I think is slightly problematic in our society. But who am I to.

[Matt Hyland]

I think in India too, they look at yoga as a white person thing.

[Monica Padman]

Maybe now they might like, it's so

[Matt Hyland]

much bigger in America. Like a cultural. Not a cultural phenomenon. I mean, it's kind of been here for a long time.

[Dax Shepard]

It's kind of like pizza if you're Italian, Literally.

[Monica Padman]

True.

[Dax Shepard]

Like, I think Italians look at America like they have more pizza than anyone could imagine in every single shape. Somehow it came from here. But look what, they've gone bananas. There's a weird parallel between.

[Matt Hyland]

I think it's like sushi in America too, right? Like everything spicy. Crunchyrolls. They're delicious. But definitely some Japanese person would be

[Monica Padman]

like, that's not sushi.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, we like the McDonald ice stuff by the Way I'm here for it. I love a spicy tuna crispy rice.

[Matt Hyland]

I love that. Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, so you get married in 2007 after seven years. I guess you've been together 2001. And then you start the first restaurant, which is just Emily, in 2012.

[Emily Hyland]

Oh, 2014. We just celebrated 12 years operationally.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, so you knew you wanted to make pizza and you knew you wanted to do what? What were you wanting to accomplish with a restaurant?

[Emily Hyland]

I wasn't. I feel like you dragged her into it. Oh, you didn't drag me. I very much got pulled into that space. I withdrew from the graduate program I was in, studying to become a school building leader in New York City. And I had resigned from my job as a public school teacher. Was not happy. And so I was teaching yoga, two classes a week, making no money. That seemed like a place of possibility, but also like, what the heck? And he was working as a line cook, making no money. And so again, the time felt like, if we're going to do it, let's jump in and try this.

[Dax Shepard]

Can I ask, where the fuck did you get the capital? It sounds like you were barely paying your rent. How did you get the capital to start something?

[Emily Hyland]

Matt's dad died and he inherited a little bit of money.

[Matt Hyland]

Grandma too. It was like 100 grand or something. So we had to really keep it on the cheap to open it.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, this is also very risky. If I'm dead broke and I inherit 100 grand, I don't know that I'm immediately gonna gamble it on opening a business.

[Emily Hyland]

Cause mom's basement was the plan if we failed.

[Monica Padman]

Right?

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah. Grandma died and that was like three years later. I think we did. It wasn't like, oh, wait, you got

[Monica Padman]

money, it takes risk.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah. We dumped like everything into it. We were like, we gotta go all in. And we did. And then it worked out.

[Emily Hyland]

We were so broke though, we couldn't even put tap lines in. In the beginning.

[Matt Hyland]

We did the Kickstarter for the pizza oven.

[Emily Hyland]

That's right.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah. Wow, our beautiful pizza ovens.

[Dax Shepard]

And when you guys were sit. Sitting down dreaming it up, were you drawing pictures? How were you thinking of what it would look like? And what were you thinking was going to be your guys novel offering into a very, very crowded restaurant space in New York?

[Emily Hyland]

Well, we were super impulsive. We had gone for a walk to go eat at a restaurant in Clinton Hill that Matt had been told about by Dale Tallday, who was a buddy of ours. And we got to the restaurant and it was shuttered and we were like, that's where we're putting our restaurant. And we had never really been in that neighborhood and hadn't been living in Brooklyn that long. We had no doing this the way we did. But we went and found a coffee shop and we drafted on a sheet of paper in my journal, how much might it cost to get in here? I think we called my dad to come look at the space that night with us or the next day or whatever. Yeah. Hustled to get in there. And that was it.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, so almost location before overarching game plan of what it's going to be.

[Matt Hyland]

But we knew we wanted a pizza.

[Dax Shepard]

And what was going to be unique about your pizza?

[Matt Hyland]

Well, I love Neapolitan pizza, but I think my favorite pizza style is New Haven, which has like a very charred crust on it. Because Neapolitan pizza is wet in the middle. That's why you eat with a knife and fork. So I wanted to have more of a dry pizza of Neapolitan.

[Emily Hyland]

Doesn't like a soupy middle.

[Matt Hyland]

No soupy middle and no big puffy crust. So we push our crust down and go toppings to the edge. Because people want more toppings than crust. You hate those bubbles.

[Dax Shepard]

You fucking hate them.

[Matt Hyland]

I don't hate them. I just don't wanna serve them.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, you just don't wanna serve them.

[Monica Padman]

You're fine to eat them.

[Matt Hyland]

I'll eat them.

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Matt Hyland]

It's obviously not New Haven style, but I tried to base how they cook their pizza on how we kind of cook our pizza.

[Dax Shepard]

Is the original pizza that you guys started with what I have eaten there? Was it rectangle and what we might call Detroit stylish?

[Emily Hyland]

No. So we have a big wood burning oven at the original location. So it's rounds. Wood fired pizza.

[Matt Hyland]

And then Emy squared is the Detroit style one.

[Dax Shepard]

So what's the timeline? From dad comes. He looks at it. He must be thinking this terrible idea. But they're young, and I'm very supportive.

[Matt Hyland]

Very supportive.

[Emily Hyland]

Was he?

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah, he was just like.

[Dax Shepard]

He was supportive. I said that, but I bet he was like, what are they doing?

[Matt Hyland]

He was like, you got to do this, you guys. Because we were thinking about buying an apartment or something. And then we were like, let's use that money to open a restaurant. And your father was just like, no, you guys are opening this restaurant.

[Dax Shepard]

Was your dad worried that you had had so many interests at this point?

[Emily Hyland]

My parents were both educators. They were not happy. I resigned from my career track job at the Department of Education to Pursue yoga and then open a pizza restaurant.

[Matt Hyland]

They believed in the vision, right? They were both.

[Emily Hyland]

That's true.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah. They were both, like, very supportive.

[Emily Hyland]

He's a very talented chef. And they knew that from the get go. And so we were doing it, so they got on board. In the beginning, it was a real affair of our family. My mom was there scrubbing sinks.

[Matt Hyland]

My mom was baking some cheesecakes.

[Emily Hyland]

Everyone really jumped in and helped. My sister was one of our first employees. So it was a family affair.

[Matt Hyland]

Sister, manager, basically.

[Monica Padman]

How old were you both at this time?

[Emily Hyland]

30. What is that, 24?

[Matt Hyland]

I think I was 33.

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah, that sounds about right.

[Monica Padman]

So early 30s?

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

What was the original menu? It was just pizza or when did the burger arrive?

[Matt Hyland]

So before the burger, we had like five pastas. Was it spaghlini or something? Great Brooklyn based pasta. And then that was my real passion too, because I always wanted to cook pasta. Like a pasta restaurant with pizza. And then the big burger comes around.

[Emily Hyland]

Matt was bored of eating pizza, and so the burger started as something for him.

[Matt Hyland]

Actually, it was the wings first. That's where that sauce came from.

[Emily Hyland]

We had an employee named Tim Nguyen, and he really was the catalyst for the Emmy sauce and was crafting and playing and then merged the wing sauce with mayo and the Emmy sauce emerged.

[Matt Hyland]

I made a plate of crispy pig ears with the wing sauce on it, and I drizzled the kewpie mayo on top, and then when they mixed together at the bottom, like that became the Emmy sauce.

[Monica Padman]

Wow.

[Matt Hyland]

Because that sauce was so much better. Then we started making it for the family meal.

[Dax Shepard]

How long into this experiment does that happen?

[Matt Hyland]

That's probably like a year and a half that far.

[Emily Hyland]

I thought it was like six, seven months in. It's all such a blow.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, I'm sure.

[Matt Hyland]

I looked at that New York magazine article and it was like June of 15.

[Emily Hyland]

Oh, maybe it was about a year then. Okay. Because we hadn't taken any vacation and I was gone with my family when. And that whole infatuation article came out. Anyway, Matt put the burger. It was for him.

[Dax Shepard]

How well was the restaurant doing in that first year? It was it kind of immediately successful.

[Matt Hyland]

We were making money.

[Dax Shepard]

Both of us were working there 16 hours a day.

[Matt Hyland]

So we were taking positions 25 hours a day. Yeah, it was rough. And we were purposely closed on Tuesdays because most restaurants are closed Monday and we wanted to go out to dinner.

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah.

[Matt Hyland]

Restaurants were always open on Tuesday night.

[Emily Hyland]

I greeted every single guest and he made every single pizza that first year. Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Really, it was a lot, but it was right away.

[Emily Hyland]

It was.

[Dax Shepard]

We went for the first time. You guys would have already been open for probably three or four years.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, because it was a live show.

[Dax Shepard]

19, probably 20. 19.

[Monica Padman]

Rob, when was our Brooklyn live show?

[Dax Shepard]

I'd say around 18 or 19. It still wasn't a location that would scream this restaurant should be there. And I'm sure the neighborhood's only gotten better in those four years since you opened. So to me it doesn't seem obvious you guys would have picked that spot. There's not a bunch of other great restaurants all around. Maybe increasingly so, but certainly not at the beginning, right?

[Emily Hyland]

No, not at all.

[Matt Hyland]

All good neighborhood places.

[Dax Shepard]

You hit the timing lottery in that a lot of people were moving to Brooklyn and probably people going to go out and pay for a nice meal.

[Monica Padman]

I found you because I was doing the thing I do when I go to a new city, which is what are the best new restaurants or best restaurants? And I think you were on eater the 38 best.

[Dax Shepard]

You were on the 30, you did best burger specifically. I think so. Cuz you were like, we got to go have the burger.

[Monica Padman]

And I had actually already been. I'd been to the one West Village one with your kids when Kristen was shooting a movie there. So this was early. This must have been pretty soon.

[Dax Shepard]

I was shooting buddy games.

[Monica Padman]

You were shooting buddy games. And she was shooting like father. And the kids were really little and I was there to babysit. I like went there to go help. And I must have found like, oh, there's this good pizza place. And I took them. There's a picture of me and the little kids at the pizza place. I was like, the pizza's so good. I could not believe how good it was. And then the burger. Unfortunately, I have not really gone back to the pizza. I want to go back for the pizza.

[Dax Shepard]

She drugged me. We had a show that night and I had shot the night before a live show up till like one in the morning, took a red eye, landed and was like, I'm going to sleep until the show. And she's like, we've got to try this burger. So I was a little like, what are we going to do here? And then I know you've heard me tell the story, I'm sure. Or it's gotten to you. We got there and at that time it was $27 for the burger. And I go, this is not.

[Monica Padman]

This is ridiculous.

[Dax Shepard]

Monica, $27 burger and three bites. And I look at her and I go, this is the most underpriced burger I've ever had in my life. I would spend $55 for this burger. And not that I would also.

[Monica Padman]

It was packed when we got there. I was like, oh, no, we might not be able to get in.

[Dax Shepard]

And we went right when it opened at like 5:00pm yeah. Oh, okay. So it's working right away. And what are the stresses? You. You're commenting on it. You guys are both working around the clock. You guys, I guess, have Tuesday to not be co workers. How's that all simmering?

[Emily Hyland]

Not well.

[Matt Hyland]

Not well.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's hard, right?

[Matt Hyland]

It wasn't like, not well. It was just like, we couldn't take that day off and just, like, not worry about the restaurant. There's always label. Someone doesn't show up, and then a food delivery doesn't happen. That Tuesday, we couldn't be like, let's just go out to dinner and chill and not worry about the restaurant. But we're always, like, checking our phones. We're always worried about the restaurants.

[Dax Shepard]

I think people really do underestimate the amount of work it requires to start a restaurant. Wouldn't you say?

[Emily Hyland]

They do, yeah. And when you do it with your partner. And we were very solid. I mean, we'd been together for a long time. It felt solid. We weren't able to compartmentalize and everything. 3 o' clock in the morning, arguing in bed over something.

[Matt Hyland]

I feel like actually that didn't happen till Emmy Squared opened.

[Emily Hyland]

Maybe.

[Matt Hyland]

I think the original restaurant, we were a little more.

[Dax Shepard]

You were in the probably honeymoon phase of having created something that's working.

[Matt Hyland]

And then we opened the second one.

[Emily Hyland]

I mean, ask Eboo. He might.

[Matt Hyland]

I love ibu.

[Emily Hyland]

Our dishwasher is the keeper of all secrets. There's no. Cause the restaurant basement is so tiny. So we would get in fights in the little wine room. And poor Ibo would be, like, turning the volume up on his jazz.

[Matt Hyland]

He's been there since day one.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh.

[Emily Hyland]

I think a big rift was that Matt was in his calling. I have just these memories of looking across the dining room. It was an open kitchen. Cause we wanted it to feel like an extension of our home. We love to, like, host things. And he would be at the oven, glowing in what he was supposed to be doing, and I was missing the mark. I'm very good at operations and systems and hospitality, and I was doing well in terms of my performance. But I was really struggling as a human because it wasn't aligned with how I wanted to be spending my time.

[Matt Hyland]

That's why I said I dragged you into it.

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah, Yeah. I was melting down. I didn't have the results.

[Dax Shepard]

He was living his dream, and you weren't living your dream.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Matt Hyland]

And the pressure, so supportive though, of it. It was amazing. Right. It's not like she would ever crack and be like, I don't want to do this anymore. It was just like she was always.

[Emily Hyland]

Well, I was good at it, but it was also like I was Emily of Emily, which was weird as an identity thing, too.

[Matt Hyland]

You're right.

[Dax Shepard]

But I would say, too, when couples work together, and I've worked with my wife a bunch of times, generally if someone's having a very stressful moment in their job, the other person necessarily isn't having their most stressful moment.

[Emily Hyland]

Right.

[Dax Shepard]

And then vice versa. And often there becomes a nice rhythm of like, okay, it's kind of my time to take up some space. And now it's your time to take up some space. When you're in the exact same pursuit, you're both dealing with the exact same stress at the exact same moment. So it's like there's no one around who's, like, outside of the bubble that can be the outside, objective person going, like, yep, I know. And.

[Monica Padman]

Or provide comfort.

[Matt Hyland]

Your sister was kind of like that.

[Emily Hyland]

She tried.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah, she was pretty good.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. In your partnership, you want your partner to be a source of comfort. And if you guys are both experiencing the same stress stress, neither of you can really be. It's different with us, obviously, because we're not in a relationship, but we're at the same stress level at the same time. Always when it comes to the job, that causes fights, that causes friction.

[Dax Shepard]

If we can't fill the schedule, we're both stressed out dealing with that. And then something else pops up, and it's like, oh, yeah, we're already. Our baseline is, like, freaked out about two weeks from now.

[Monica Padman]

Or we might have differences of opinion on how to handle it, and we both care about it. It's very complicated.

[Emily Hyland]

That was a big part of it. I think we operate from very different perspectives in terms of how we manage. And we're very different people and are very suited not to be together, working, or in relationship at this point, outside of friendly relationship now. And that kind of fissures that were under the surface that we didn't notice in terms of we grew up together and we became very different people. So that was really amplified by the pressure cooker of that circumstance.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. I don't even need to ask what the different vibe was it's very obvious to me you're very kind of laid back and you're on a spiritual surf mission. A pizza surf mission. And then you're gonna figure everything out, get it done. Yeah, yeah.

[Matt Hyland]

We also had different problems at different times in the restaurant. She's very good at front of house stuff. I don't know a lot about that stuff. So she did that thing and she'd be frustrated by employee problems or like liquor deliveries and stuff like that. And then I'd be in the back of the house and. Same thing where it's just like dough doesn't rise correctly, where hamburger buns didn't come in. We would have different stresses and try to lean on each other. But when you have different stresses and also trying to come together, it's still hard.

[Dax Shepard]

You're not terribly sympathetic to the other person.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah. You don't just go down the street and buy one. What's the big deal, right? It is a big deal.

[Monica Padman]

Was there ego stuff happening?

[Dax Shepard]

Sharing the.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, sharing the.

[Dax Shepard]

As they started getting. As you start getting written about and accolades are coming as. Is that challenging.

[Matt Hyland]

Well, I love Emily taking care of all that. Right.

[Monica Padman]

All that stuff.

[Matt Hyland]

She was good at it. So she is good at it. She's good at the publicity, she's good at doing the interviews, setting that stuff up. And she comes in, she's like, don't forget to smile. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Emily Hyland]

Things like that don't speak too quickly in the podcast today.

[Monica Padman]

But did you, Emily, were you like, I'm not really getting the credit. I'm doing a ton of the work and making sure this thing runs.

[Dax Shepard]

But the chef's gonna get all the.

[Emily Hyland]

I feel like maybe it was the opposite. And I mean, I don't know. Matt named it after me, which wasn't expected. We really couldn't land on a name. And so then suddenly he names it Emily. And then it becomes this personality that I'm wearing, which was very strange in terms of my identity at that time. And yoga and poetry were stripped away. Cause there was no time for anything else. And so I was very much that. And because I was forward facing, I do feel like maybe there was some unconscious under the surface friction where you were doing all of this, but I was the person with a camera. Even though you didn't want that.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Like if I created the burger and then Emily's doing an interview about how great the burger is and just won all these awards, I might be like, yeah, but also I create.

[Monica Padman]

Right, right.

[Matt Hyland]

She's a hype. Person then. Right. Why would I try to force my way into do something that she's better at doing? She's not gonna come and cook the burger.

[Dax Shepard]

I mean, that's extremely healthy point of view. But under stress and everything else, that would be hard for me to always manage.

[Matt Hyland]

I'm okay with her being Emily and being front facing. And then, like, I make the food in the back. That's like the mom and pop shop. Right.

[Emily Hyland]

But it got very complicated, so we opened the West Village. We literally signed on with our growth partners. Open the West Village.

[Dax Shepard]

Did they approach you or did you go seek?

[Emily Hyland]

They approached us with all the acclaim and everything. And then that same month is when our marriage fell apart. And so then the brand is Pizza Loves Emily. It's built on our love story. And that felt very challenging. And I think that's when personalities, egos, whatever you want to call it, hurt

[Dax Shepard]

and all these things.

[Matt Hyland]

I thought more people would care that we got divorced in the sense of publicity, Right? Like, nobody cared.

[Emily Hyland]

I don't think a lot of people know.

[Monica Padman]

I was gonna say I was go,

[Matt Hyland]

okay, maybe that's the point. Maybe nobody knows.

[Dax Shepard]

Before we get there, when we go to the Village, we name it Emmy Square.

[Emily Hyland]

It's still Pizza Loves Emily, but it was like a mishmash.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, Williamsburg came first.

[Emily Hyland]

Williamsburg did. That was the flagship Emmy Squared.

[Dax Shepard]

Pizza Loves Emily was Williamsburg.

[Monica Padman]

No, that's not West Village.

[Emily Hyland]

So we have Emily original in Clinton Hill. Emmy Squared opens in Williamsburg in 2016. And then we open the Pizza Loves Emily kind of come out in West Village. In West Village.

[Dax Shepard]

Stay tuned for more armchair expert, if you dare. We are supported by Allstate. Checking Allstate first could save you hundreds on car insurance. That's smart. Not checking the pockets of your jeans before doing laundry. Classic oversight. That mystery clunking in the dryer. Yeah, that was your lip balm's final moments. And somehow there's always one random receipt in there to dissolve into confusion. Confetti. Yeah, Checking first is smart. So check all state first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings vary subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Allstate North America Insurance Company Affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois. We are supported by hp. My mental to do list is already full. Fix something around the house. Refill prescriptions. Remember to text someone back. Keep track of a million little life things. The last thing I want on that list is, oh, don't forget printer ink.

[Monica Padman]

No, it's horrible.

[Dax Shepard]

It's the bane of everyone's existence. What if you could just take that off your list for years? The Dream that's the idea behind the HP Smart Tank printer from America's Most Trusted Printer brand. Instead of those tiny cartridges that always seem to run out at the worst time, the HP Smart Tank uses a refillable ink tank, and it comes with up to three years of ink included. It's built to be simple, the easiest tank printer you'll ever use, use with the best print quality, period. It's the last printer you'll ever need. You know right before a trip when you're trying to print out a reservation or itinerary and you realize you haven't touched your printer in months? This is the kind of thing that's just ready when you are if you want to take one more thing off your mental to do list. Search for HP Smart Tank this podcast is brought to you by Squarespace, the all in one website platform designed to help you stand out and succeed online. From websites and online stores to marketing tools and analytics, Squarespace gives you everything you need to build and grow your presence in one place. When we first got the Armchair Expert website up and running, Wabi Wob used Squarespace, and honestly, it made sense right away. It looked polished, it was easy to navigate, and it didn't feel like we had to become web designers just to make something good. What I like about Squarespace is that it gives you a lot of flexibility without making things complicated. You can start with one of their beautiful templates and customize it so it actually feels like you whether you're building a portfolio, a business, or just finally making the thing you've been meaning to make. And once it's live, Squarespace also has built in analytics, which is great because you can actually see what people are engaging with instead of just guessing. So head to squarespace.comdax for a free trial and when you're ready to Launch, use code DAX to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. We are supported by Helix, so a little while back Helix sent Monica and me mattresses. Neither of us really knew what to expect, but I have to say it's been a few months now and I genuinely notice a difference. What I'm noticing is I run so much cooler on it.

[Monica Padman]

I agree. And just the sleep quality is nice. Like when you wake up you feel like you really are refreshed.

[Dax Shepard]

Yes, because otherwise I wake up so sweaty I'm taking blankets off and then I get cold and then I'm putting them back on.

[Monica Padman]

It's a nightmare and then you're getting no sleep. Sleep.

[Dax Shepard]

Here's the thing about Helix. They match you to a mattress based on how you sleep. Side sleeper, back sleeper. You run hot. Whatever it is, there's a mattress for you. Shipping is free and they have 120 night sleep trial so you can actually live with it before you commit. It's funny, spring is when everyone starts refreshing their space and your mattress is probably the last thing you think to upgrade, but it's also the thing you spend the most time on. So do yourself a favor and go to helixsleep.comarmchair for 20% off. Site wise, that's H E L I X sleep.com armchair for 20% off. Make sure you enter our show name at checkout so they know we sent you helixsleep.com armchair. Okay, so what is me squared? How's it going to differ from Emily?

[Emily Hyland]

Matt wanted to do a second concept, wanted to grow the brand.

[Matt Hyland]

I want to like a square slice place right next door to the original one.

[Emily Hyland]

He used to make a lot of focaccia sheet pan pies for us at home, which was delicious and loves a frico crust. Right. And so found this backdoor entry into what the amazingness of Detroit style pizza is.

[Matt Hyland]

We ordered a bunch of frozen from Buddies. Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Grew up eating at Buddies.

[Emily Hyland]

So my nickname, he called me Emmy and so is Emmy square pizza. Second location, Emmy squared. And that also took off and has a great burger on that menu. Yeah.

[Matt Hyland]

The big mat is a different burger.

[Dax Shepard]

You created the Le Big Mac for Emmy 2, correct?

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

So now here's the part I really relate to which is I have my own identity and then my wife has her own identity and then we have a shared identity which is us doing commercials together. I know. I read an interview where you were talking about that fear of, oh, we have this other thing. We have this combined identity which is these restaurants and they're famous, these restaurants and they're getting written about, you're winning lots of awards and so stuff. And yeah, that's an interesting third person in a relationship. Every couple has a shared identity at a dinner party. But I think when you have a very public facing shared identity, it's quite complicated. Would you agree? You can start feel like you're servicing this third thing and not the original thing.

[Emily Hyland]

I think a struggle for me with that was it felt performative and that's not how I operated in terms of the founding of the original. And Matt would always say, say it's a business. It's not Emotional. It's a business. It's not personal.

[Matt Hyland]

Well, I think the original one's personal and emotional.

[Emily Hyland]

Well, so. And in terms of that third member of the relationship that was our custody battle during the divorce was the reason we still co own and operate. Emily is cuz neither of us could par with it.

[Dax Shepard]

That was the child you were going to have shared custody, no matter what.

[Emily Hyland]

It really complicated things. And then the copy for the cookbook was due that summer that our marriage fell apart. So I'm writing our love story.

[Dax Shepard]

Emily, the cookbook.

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah. We met over at Ceremony Olive Pizza sitting on the floor of the dorm. So it was all just very weird.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Did you feel fraudulent?

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And were you starting to wonder, like if I let that whole identity go, who am I?

[Emily Hyland]

Yes. And I took a leave of absence from the business because I couldn't function

[Dax Shepard]

because of that tension in terms of all of it.

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah, I left and never really came back in in the same way because then pandemic came and everything changed. And I mean, it all worked out for the better, but that had a huge impact on my role as an operator of the business.

[Dax Shepard]

And Matt, how are you dealing with the death of this third identity?

[Matt Hyland]

I sort of mentally left also. I'm still kind of going through the process of it. And I think restaurants, they can be like a beautiful stage, like a staged area. I would try to separate personal feelings in the restaurant, just being like, okay, we're going on. And it's more of just like, let's do this performative thing and then like, you know, be done and then whatever. But I mentally basically checked out.

[Dax Shepard]

Not that you're an abusive relationship, but it does remind me of like Cher was hating living with Sonny and then they would go do the show and loved the show because they could be their old selves there. It was like this weird little sanctuary from all their problems.

[Matt Hyland]

It was always weird when Emily wasn't at the restaurant because it's just like I don't trust anyone but her to be in front and do that stuff. Because even though we had our differences, like in the marriage, always the restaurant, there's never like an argument about it, really. It's just like, this is what we're doing. And we knew it. We always had each other's back when it came to the restaurant. So when she wasn't there, I just felt alone there. My partner is not here to guarantee it's going to go well because that's what she does.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Emily Hyland]

Nice to to know. Thank you.

[Matt Hyland]

It's true.

[Dax Shepard]

I say to this to my wife all the time when we work together. I literally can't help but say, like, oh, you're my favorite person to work with. You're so good, always. Immediately, you're easy to work with. If we got divorced, I'd still love working with her. She's still the easiest person for me to work with. She's just such a professional, and we have such a communication working together.

[Matt Hyland]

And she's always got your back too, right?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. It's very fascinating how you can have these compartmentalized relationships within a relationship, and all of it's happening at the same time.

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Yes.

[Emily Hyland]

There's no breathing room.

[Monica Padman]

Were the fissures. So they were not about the restaurant? I mean, obviously, everything's all tied in. Everything's muddy, and it's a soup. But were the breaking points not connected to the restaurant?

[Emily Hyland]

I think they were connected to the restaurant. It was so enmeshed. I mean, our life was just that, and we were angry at each other. And I don't want to speak for you, but I feel like it's fair to say we were angry at each other and just not on the same page. And are interests were divergent.

[Dax Shepard]

You guys did this amazing thing in the New York Magazine. Maybe I read unhitched or something. Some.

[Emily Hyland]

Oh, New York Times when my first book came out.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. You were saying. I mean, look, you guys met in college as sophomores, and you're now into yoga, and you're on a path, and you're a chef dude. That's what you live for and want to pursue. And they're not getting closer together, these interests. They're getting further apart. And neither of you want to do each other's thing, per se, in the off time. That's getting old.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah, you just kind of grow up. And our friendship took a hit, obviously, because we're getting divorced.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Matt Hyland]

But, like, after that, we come back together. We're still fans of each other being in the original restaurant. We still have each other's back when it comes to the original.

[Emily Hyland]

That took years, though.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah. But, you know, on the other side.

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah.

[Matt Hyland]

We've both grown up into, like, adults with separate interests. We can still have relatable things like the restaurant and just life in general.

[Emily Hyland]

We've had some of our first healing conversations about our relationship just this past year.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. I was gonna ask how long this. Cause it looks from the outside that you're very comfortable with one another and still good friends.

[Dax Shepard]

You're both remarried?

[Matt Hyland]

Yes.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Emily Hyland]

Jack. Well, we're Much more suited to be with. His wife is lovely, and my husband is amazing.

[Monica Padman]

Some people never get there right after a divorce where they can say that they can say his wife is lovely. That doesn't happen all the time. So you guys obviously took some care.

[Emily Hyland]

Thank God she's here to referee while we've been in LA together. Thank God for Simone this week is all I'm gonna say. Otherwise, there would have been tears for sure. I had his number blocked up until I guess we sold Emmy Square.

[Monica Padman]

Good to know, because I think most people can't relate to. Well, we got divorced, and we're just still best friends. That's not normal.

[Emily Hyland]

No. There was a lot of drama, a lot of pain. And it's only recently that in our therapeutic work separately, I mean, I think a big part of it was. Which we just recently talked about. We both come from very codependent family of origins. And so. So at 18 and 20 years old, we just perpetuated those behaviors. And now that we can look back and start unwinding some of those narratives, it's like, oh, we can see how we were doing that and how we're different than that now. So this is actually the healthiest I feel like we've ever been. Honestly.

[Matt Hyland]

Fun this week too.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Yeah. What kind of pains came with growing? I think that seems daunting. Perfecting Emily seems doable. And then two more. How was that challenging? And how do you oversight it? You guys must have both cared so much about it having the same quality at all three. What were the kind of the challenges

[Emily Hyland]

that were popping up before you get to the food? I didn't want to grow it. Let's get back to our life. Emily is functioning. I don't want to do more. And Matt was like, this is our chance to do this. We're doing it. And thank God. I mean, we did it changed our lives. But I think that was a cool moment of strife, just in terms of. Okay, now I'm helping to scale this thing that's already overwhelming me that my nervous system can barely handle. I'm completely a hot mess as a human.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Yeah. And now you're gonna times that by three.

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah.

[Matt Hyland]

I took a more scientific approach to it. I knew I wanted to cook the square pies in a convection oven, which is like the big oven with the fan in the back of it. But then, like, every time you open the oven, like, it cools down. Right. And then you start with inconsistencies, and then you need timers, and you have to trust who's putting it in? And so I went to like, I think a Jets or something. I don't know, one of those, like, chain pizza places that has a conveyor belt oven. And I was like, oh, you know what? Every time a pizza goes through, it'll be the same. It'll be the same, Won't lose any heat. Such a complete opposite of wood fired oven where it's like so high maintenance and you got your temperature right and your hotspots and your this and that. So it's like. Well, I just made the actual cooking process easier, right?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah.

[Matt Hyland]

Like it gets topped and then it goes in. And like.

[Emily Hyland]

Because labor is impossible to monitor when you're scaling.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah, yeah. Having that little control where we could take one person out of the kitchen was helpful. But then obviously Emily's dealing with the front of house and just a whole new squad of like.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, there's no way to mechanize that. Yeah.

[Matt Hyland]

I mean, thankfully you're a teacher. Because I'd like walk upstairs from the kitchen and there'd be like a white.

[Emily Hyland]

Love my chart paper.

[Matt Hyland]

Chart paper. Basically teaching the staff how we want this done. And being a teacher really worked out for that.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Emily Hyland]

I really enjoyed doing staff trainings, especially as the Me Squared organization grew. I helped open a few of those restaurants and would do that and build the curriculum for that in the early days. And. And so that was an enjoyable part of scaling things. But how do you maintain the special texture and dimension of this ethos, this energy with 30 locations?

[Monica Padman]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

Hard. Before we get to that, where did the crinkle cut French fries come from? As just a fan. Yeah. The waffle fries, how do they come about? I mean, they're not as good as burger, but they're pushing up against it.

[Matt Hyland]

I usually cook and put stuff on the menu that I want to eat. So the original restaurant has straight, great fries. Emily, West Village has curly fries.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, that's right.

[Matt Hyland]

I don't know if it still does, but then Emmy Squared has.

[Dax Shepard]

Now it has waffles. That one has waffles in West Village. I was just there.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah, but they used to have curly fries. So I wanted each one of my restaurants to have different fries. I'd go to that restaurant, be like, these are the fries I want to eat today.

[Dax Shepard]

But when you sit down to design a waffle fry, what does one do?

[Matt Hyland]

Oh, these comes in frozen.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, okay, okay.

[Matt Hyland]

We were making our own fries at Clinton Hill.

[Emily Hyland]

It wasn't sustainable.

[Matt Hyland]

Well, we served like 10 burgers a night before it got Popular.

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah.

[Matt Hyland]

You know, so it's like making your own fries. It's easy because we're gonna sell 10 burgers and, like, 300 pizzas. And then when the burger exploded, it's like, oh, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

If you've ever stood at the counter at In N Out and watched them actually make the fries manually, there is someone on that fucking smasher all day long.

[Matt Hyland]

That's not a great way to make fries, though. You want to double cook your fries.

[Dax Shepard]

You cook them, then you freeze them, then you cook them again. Is that what happens?

[Matt Hyland]

I did three cooks. I do like, a cook in a baking soda bath, sort of like circulate them in a circulator, and then do a par fry until they got slightly brown. And then we cool them down and portion them in a little bit baggie. And then when the order comes in, then it goes in the fryer.

[Dax Shepard]

No wonder I do feel like I'm going through six or seven layers of the waffle fries. Crunch, crunch, crunch, crunch. Ooh, gooey.

[Emily Hyland]

It's a good fry.

[Dax Shepard]

So once the three were up and running, weirdly, I can't believe I've never been to the Williamsburg one. Like, I'm just learning.

[Matt Hyland]

I'm never going fortunate. It's so beautiful, too. We had, like, this cool bar in the basement, the burger bar. So we don't serve burgers in the basement. There's a bar down there.

[Dax Shepard]

You ever go there?

[Emily Hyland]

That part of the neighborhood changed a lot during COVID Yeah.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah.

[Emily Hyland]

Dang. Right down by the bqe.

[Dax Shepard]

So those three, you had the original. Then you had partners in the second and the third. Right. And is it the same partners that then became a part of this 30?

[Monica Padman]

Yep.

[Emily Hyland]

So we have this restaurant, businessman, Howard Greenstone, who found us. And I had strange, random, like, family. I grew up.

[Matt Hyland]

He babysat his kids. I grew up.

[Emily Hyland]

No, I grew up next door to his brother's family. So, like, his nephews and I grew up together. So weird. But there were many people sniffing around, and it felt like with that connection, Howard was the person. He had the vision to scale it in this way that we didn't have those skills. And so he really shepherded this journey into what Emmy 2 has become.

[Dax Shepard]

Does he call and say, hey, we have one here, or does he call and say, hey, what do you think about being here?

[Matt Hyland]

There's, like, a big research team now, so we have, like, a real estate agent, a lawyer, and they are in charge of. Let's look at this lease. Is it a good lease? Is it what we're looking for foot traffic.

[Dax Shepard]

Assessing the neighborhood.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah. It's not necessarily like when we found the original or we found, like, Williamsburg or what, West Village.

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah.

[Matt Hyland]

It was sort of like we stumbled on them and they were cool.

[Emily Hyland]

Well, it was in our heart. And now it's a company, so it's a little bit different.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah. Well, when we found the locations, we were like, oh, these are exciting locations. But now it's just sort of a little more like corporate people finding the locations.

[Dax Shepard]

Right.

[Monica Padman]

What will work in this?

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah. Especially with, like, that many restaurants. It's not about your gut feeling anymore.

[Emily Hyland]

It needs to work.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, you have to be kind of an expert on the area to understand.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

So do you guys like Ray Crockett and drive around and stop it?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Different ones that check the quality we're used to.

[Matt Hyland]

We haven't done that since it got very big.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. Because at some point, you almost have to divorce yourself from all the personal things. What happens if you go in and then you're like, ah, I don't like this about this. That's too much.

[Matt Hyland]

Probably micromanaging with 30 restaurants isn't going to work.

[Monica Padman]

Exactly.

[Dax Shepard]

I mean, this is a dumb analogy, but, like, yeah, if we had to go listen to a podcast that was somehow armchair expert, but it wasn't us, that would be very bizarre. I can hardly even imagine what that experience would be like.

[Matt Hyland]

I was going to say, for me, it was a little bit of relief in a way, where, you know, we have a corporate chef. He takes care the training. If I want to do something, he'll make it happen. I was in Nashville a few weeks ago with him. You know, we started coming up with some dishes, and it was fun. And it can be creative. And he can be creative, but he

[Dax Shepard]

can implement all that.

[Matt Hyland]

Every single restaurant have different ordering people, so he's good at that.

[Emily Hyland]

It is, though, weird. Whenever I'm in the city, I'll go to the West Village and walk by or take my picture there. But to be the person who was picking out things down to the paint color on the walls, which was mushroom bisque, by the way.

[Matt Hyland]

That's right. I was like, we have to have mushroom bisque.

[Emily Hyland]

The ceiling is shaking, not stirred. Fun facts, but nobody in that restaurant would know me as Emily. Or if I come in and I'm like, hi, I'm Emily. I mean, if I walk into the front of the house, there, they wouldn't know I'm Emily of Emily. I can go see Oz in the basement. Sure. But it's different to be removed in that way. Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Does it feel sad?

[Emily Hyland]

It just feels like a very different time and place in my life. And then Emily Original, though, our first hire, Eboo, Shout out to ibu. He's this amazing, talented Senegalese artist, by the way, who is our dishwasher extraordinaire. But he's been there since day one. Sammy.

[Matt Hyland]

Sammy's the burger guy.

[Emily Hyland]

Every burger you've ever eaten has been there. So we have a lot of folks that have been with us through the whole thing at the original, but it changes when a company grows.

[Dax Shepard]

So he's the head chef, Sammy. So he's been there for 12 years now.

[Matt Hyland]

I think he started 2015 about a year in. Yeah, about a year in. And he was a prep guy.

[Emily Hyland]

Thank God for Sammy.

[Matt Hyland]

And then it doesn't even work his way out. Somebody just didn't show up to work. I'm like, sammy, let's cook these burgers. And then the first day he's up there cooking burgers with me, it's just like he's like, yo, I want to do this whole thing a day. It's like, you got it, man. Yeah, you got it. It's like, let's do this. And then it's like thousands of Bruce cooking every single burger. And he'd watch me every single time. He didn't, like, touch a burger until, like, six months in, basically because I just had him there with, like, onions putting the sauce on the burger. We just go through it over and over.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, my God, I'm starving.

[Dax Shepard]

I want the burgers.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah, I can still get the.

[Emily Hyland]

I mean, in retrospect, we should have coordinated so that he could have cooked you burgers. That's what we should have done.

[Dax Shepard]

I've gotten the kit, like, four or five times, and it works out very well.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, Old belly. If you can, you can't get to a restaurant that will give you.

[Dax Shepard]

And the hack is the instructions are perfect. They really walk you through it. But putting the bun on the patty while it's sizzling is primo. To get it nice and steamy and juicy. Yeah.

[Matt Hyland]

So good.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, so things blew up. You retreated to New Mexico.

[Emily Hyland]

Before that, I was just hunkered down in Brooklyn helping open a yoga studio there.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, okay.

[Matt Hyland]

New Mexico pandemic or after?

[Emily Hyland]

No, just 2018 between us.

[Matt Hyland]

Oh, okay.

[Dax Shepard]

In the article, there was a big fight in front of Emily.

[Emily Hyland]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

That was time to regroup.

[Emily Hyland]

After that, I spent the night in central booking in downtown Brooklyn.

[Dax Shepard]

Yes. You were arrested for hitting Matt. With a bag?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, with a booklet. Wait, we're gonna have to talk about that.

[Emily Hyland]

I was charged with assault with a weapon, a canvas bag.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, boy.

[Emily Hyland]

Two cops and foes. No, I. And student essays from teaching at cuny. I had just a bunch of college essays to grade.

[Monica Padman]

So you just took your aggression out?

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah, I lost in a way. I've never been so disembodied. I found out something about someone he was dating and it activated me and two officers were walking by.

[Matt Hyland]

It was so random. Two cops, like popped out of the subway. Exactly what had happened.

[Emily Hyland]

As opposed to do their basic duty and de escalate what was clearly a marital dispute and solve the problem. They wound up handcuffing me and arresting me. And I was taken downtown right at like 5 o'. Clock. So then I wound up staying overnight.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, God. Yeah.

[Emily Hyland]

Oh, God, it was horrible. My mom had chemo the next morning. So my dad and my mom and my sister and her brand new husband who was like, what the fuck is going on in this family? Were like walking around in downtown Brooklyn trying to get enough money out of the ATMs to like stuff it in my sister's pocket so that tomorrow she could come out and make bail. And that was the lowest moment of my life.

[Dax Shepard]

I was gonna say what kind of emotional clarity came from sitting in the jail.

[Emily Hyland]

The beauty of that was that moment changed my life because there was also a restraining order put on me to be around him. All of this was dropped and sealed and dismissed. But because of that, I was very much pining and desperately wanting to keep the restaurant alive and begging and pleading. And Matt was just firm line in the sand, like, this is over. I'm moving on. Which thank God he held that boundary because as much as I beat up against it, that was good. But the restraining order was a next level of, like, boundary or else you're gonna be in trouble. And I actually met my forever husband, Jeff. So I spent the night in Central Booking on Thursday. And then I went on a date with Jeff that Monday night. And my friend at the yoga, my friend at the yoga studio, I was very erratic that weekend. I feel like I went on a bunch of dates. And she was like, maybe you shouldn't be going on dates right now. And I was like, I'm going on this date with this guy. I'm going. And then I wound up telling him everything. And he thought it was hysterical. He's my husband. But that boundary of the restraining order, this was done. I cannot go over there. I saw this beautiful. The roomy quote, the wound is where the light enters on the side of this church that next morning. And the light just entered from. From the depths of the wound. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

The universe is weird. And you probably needed some weird nudge in the form of a restraining order to go. Okay, now we have to choose another path. Yeah, this one is a dead end.

[Emily Hyland]

And there was the most amusing part about that restraining order. So the cookbook was now at this point about to debut.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh my goodness.

[Emily Hyland]

And so there was a caveat in the restraining order that I was allowed to be with Matt for the book launch. Yeah. And that was the first time you guys.

[Dax Shepard]

What you've gone through.

[Emily Hyland]

The first time we saw each other other from the moment of this thing on the street was sitting at green light book store signing cookbooks and you were pretending.

[Dax Shepard]

The love Cookbook.

[Emily Hyland]

It was horrible.

[Dax Shepard]

This is so human. I love it.

[Matt Hyland]

Oh, God.

[Emily Hyland]

It was awful.

[Monica Padman]

This is making me feel itchy in retrospect.

[Matt Hyland]

They escorted me down to the subway police station. It's Hoyt's Gammelhorn in Brooklyn. And like, take your shirt off. So we take pictures of you. And I was just like, eh. After I to document the abuse up all over my socks here. And they're like, can you take your shirt off? Like, I don't really want to get in the police station.

[Emily Hyland]

He didn't smack you that hard.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah, I was completely blessed. I was completely.

[Emily Hyland]

I don't want to say you deserved

[Matt Hyland]

it because I don't the entire. So can you imagine like a cop in the subway? All right, take your shirt off.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah.

[Matt Hyland]

It's like, get your shirt off.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

You probably both were like, what is my life?

[Matt Hyland]

I shouldn't have gone there.

[Monica Padman]

Well, the restaurant was doing so well. To have your business be doing so well and your personal be doing so poorly. That's such a mind fuck. It looks like this, but it's so the opposite in real life is really hard.

[Dax Shepard]

Or it feels like if you're like me and your modus operandi is always going to drop to me in some way. It became firming and validating my story Interesting. Which is like. Yeah, I knew it's too good to be true. I don't deserve this. Look what a fucked up mess this is. Because. Because of course this is too good for me to have. Yeah.

[Matt Hyland]

It's like imposter syndrome, right?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like in some weird way, the Beatdowns are like, yeah, that's right. That's what it should be. Because I Don't deserve a spectacular restaurant that everyone loves and we're getting awards for.

[Monica Padman]

But it's tricky because then you can self sabotage. You can pause it. You can, like, pause these things, you know?

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, yeah. Oh, we're so weird and complicated. I love it.

[Monica Padman]

I know.

[Emily Hyland]

My sister was at that point on the emergency call list to pop in for a service at the bar. And so this all happens, and our manager is like, fuck, okay, I need to call Emily's sister. And so my sister was at some sort of event, and she's getting calls from Meg, thinking it's a Thursday night. Meg is calling me to come in and do a bar shift at the restaurant. I'm not picking up. Meg keeps calling her. She's like, why the fuck is Meg calling me? I'm not gonna work tonight at the restaurant. And then she finally picks up and it's like, oh, your sister is somewhere in the New York City prison system right now. Yeah. Wow.

[Matt Hyland]

I think that's where they held El Chapo too, at the. You're in there at the same time as him.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, my God.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, now the second chapter of everyone's life, which is. Landed beautifully. So you went on the date with the dude on a Thursday after the Monday arrest. But you do go to New Mexico, to Santa Fe, to do some kind of a grieving workshop.

[Emily Hyland]

I was seeing this amazing acupuncturist during the separation, the divorce, and she was giving me these homework assignments, like, go flirt with a barista. Get me into some competency. Things that were low stakes. And then finally she was like, you need to go take a trip by yourself somewhere. Do something. I googled writing retreat, New Mexico. I had no reason to type that in. And up pops this. Writing your story of loss and transformation, which was a grief retreat at this beautiful center called Ghost Ranch, which I highly recommend. I landed there and was like, I've never felt called somewhere like this. And so I want to get here and pandemic just for an array of reasons. Reasons expedited that experience. So, yeah, we moved there in 2022 and then got married. And if you look at pictures of me from when I was arrested and when I was at the peak success of my life, I was almost £250, drinking two bottles of wine a night, you know, like not a healthy human. And New Mexico has also been just this resurgence of me getting to be me.

[Monica Padman]

So you live there now permanently and

[Dax Shepard]

you're a yoga instructor?

[Emily Hyland]

I am. I co own and direct a studio called Yoga Yoga Source.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Gosh. So you got there.

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah.

[Matt Hyland]

Still think the ice cream is more interesting than

[Dax Shepard]

you Published Divorced business partners.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Emily Hyland]

Which I saw is on your shelf.

[Monica Padman]

Yes. Yes, we have.

[Dax Shepard]

So what year did that come out?

[Emily Hyland]

That came out in 2024. There's a great poem in there about my night in jail. Just saying.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Emily Hyland]

FYI, Bodily functions in jail.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, wow.

[Dax Shepard]

We love bodily functions.

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah. And then my second book is coming out. My Wise Little Ghost There Officially in.

[Dax Shepard]

And that's all poems.

[Emily Hyland]

It is, yeah. Narrative poems. So that's about processing the abortion I had during our divorce to add more strife to the whole situation. I wound up getting pregnant.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Emily Hyland]

A week after everything fell apart. And so processing that experience of grief through the lens of psychedelic therapy, which has been just life changing for me.

[Dax Shepard]

Psilocybin or ayahuasca?

[Emily Hyland]

Psilocybin, predominantly.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. And lsd?

[Emily Hyland]

No, Some MDMA therapy. I had a preventative double mastectomy three years ago, and so I started the psychedel therapy to help integrate what felt like a very Frankenstein y torso. So the MDMA helped with that. And then as I graduated to the psilocybin, this whole experience of healing with who would have been my daughter came through in this book.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, wow.

[Monica Padman]

Wow.

[Dax Shepard]

So, yeah, just to wrap up your story, and you kind of said it, I'm having the greatest success of my life and things are the lowest. I think this is a bizarrely common experience. And to think that you're happiest now.

[Emily Hyland]

I think so.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then you.

[Matt Hyland]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

So, Matt, how did you meet your wife? You ended up absconding to Austin, which is my favorite city.

[Matt Hyland]

Oh, we got a good barbecue truck there.

[Monica Padman]

Ooh.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, I'm going at the end of the month. Where is this barbecue truck?

[Matt Hyland]

15 minutes north of the river.

[Emily Hyland]

Oh, let him feed you barbecue.

[Dax Shepard]

By the campus?

[Matt Hyland]

No, it's above the campus, probably by your.

[Dax Shepard]

What's your hotel? You like?

[Monica Padman]

Oh, Commodore Perry is.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah, it's beautiful. Oh, my God, the food is so good.

[Dax Shepard]

Is it anywhere near there?

[Matt Hyland]

No, it's near. We're like. All the big tech campuses are.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, okay. She gets arrested. She has a restraining order. She goes on her journey. What do you do after that arrest? How do you start to rebuild?

[Matt Hyland]

Our business partner Howard, created a restaurant out of nowhere for me to do something to escape to. Yeah, we got a Michelin award for that. Like a Bib Gourmand, which was really great.

[Dax Shepard]

What kind of restaurant was that?

[Matt Hyland]

We did grilled pizza, just like Al Forno in Providence, which was our favorite restaurant. We did grilled pizza, and then it just couldn't survive. Survive through pandemic. People took advantage of the protest to, like, riot. That was unfortunate because the protests were happening and we were supportive, but then we got broken into and our liquor was stolen. So, like, people were abusing the protests, and then we're just like, fuck it. It's like everything's like trash.

[Dax Shepard]

Really quick. When you win a Michelin star, there's

[Matt Hyland]

ripple of the star. It's the bib gourmand, so it's almost a star.

[Dax Shepard]

Do they present you with a plaque?

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah, it's in my kitchen.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, so the plaque is in your kitchen.

[Emily Hyland]

And that got a Times review too, Violet, right?

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah, we got Times review. Pete Wells is from Rhode island, and we kind of did some Rhode island island stuff. So, you know, after, like, a month, he reviewed it, like, quickly. We caught him there twice. And then Dale tall, really quick.

[Dax Shepard]

These reviewers come unannounced, obviously, right?

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah, yeah. But, like, everyone knows.

[Dax Shepard]

And what happens when they arrive? Everyone shits their pants.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah. Everyone's like, yeah, he's here. It's like Dale was more experienced with dealing with reviewers, so he's just like, we make two of every dish, and then we taste each one, and then one goes out to him, and the other one just. It doesn't matter. Goes in the trash by a dishwasher or something.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Matt Hyland]

So he was very good with that.

[Monica Padman]

Scary.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Also, how do you take a bite out of each dish without fucking up the dish?

[Matt Hyland]

Well, it depends on the dish.

[Monica Padman]

Right.

[Matt Hyland]

It wasn't like, we bit of burger.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Or pizza.

[Monica Padman]

They're probably the sauce, all the ingredients.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Matt Hyland]

Like, you know, he ordered a few pastas.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Matt Hyland]

I had met Simone maybe a few months before that.

[Dax Shepard]

Opened in New York.

[Matt Hyland]

In New York. Yeah. She had a restaurant nearby called Little Tong. Or she had a few of them. I'd been to them, but, like, I never knew her, and then I became friends with her publicist, and then we started going and then kind of started dating through you that way.

[Dax Shepard]

Do chefs share a common bond?

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah, we like to complain to each other about, like, labor and people not showing up, and things have gone wrong. So, yeah, there's a camaraderie there of chefs, comparatively. There aren't a lot of female chefs compared to male chefs in New York. You know, when I met Samoan, I was like, oh, cool. It's like a female chef.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah, that's hot. That was in May of 2019. And then we Started really dating in October, and then she got pregnant like, three months later. Wow. She was pregnant all during the pandemic. And our son was born in August of 2020, which was so bizarre to

[Monica Padman]

bring a baby in at that time. Feels like. Ah.

[Matt Hyland]

And we didn't know if groceries would be infected. Right. Like, there's a time since, like, you wipe down groceries.

[Emily Hyland]

Hospital to.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. And also that.

[Dax Shepard]

Also New York was uniquely visible and hard compared to other places.

[Matt Hyland]

Luckily, the hospital we're in, it delayed opening because of pandemic. So we were one of the first people ever.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, really?

[Matt Hyland]

The hospital was cool.

[Dax Shepard]

Wow. Fresh sheets.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah. Like, snip a ribbon at the door, be the first, like, baby.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, wow.

[Emily Hyland]

Wow.

[Monica Padman]

I was at a hospital in New York also during the pandemic. Right before the pandemic.

[Matt Hyland]

That's terrifying.

[Monica Padman]

Like, week or two before.

[Emily Hyland]

Oh, wow.

[Monica Padman]

With my seizure. And guess what? After the seizure, Kristen and I went to Emily.

[Emily Hyland]

Oh, so that's right. Cause I remember you sat at the chef's table.

[Monica Padman]

Yes.

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah. And then everything closed down right after that.

[Monica Padman]

Exactly.

[Emily Hyland]

It was like third week in March,

[Dax Shepard]

I think you had the first baby. She had the last burger.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, exactly.

[Matt Hyland]

I had my birthday party and then, like, two days later, March 12th maybe, it was like, that's it. Everything's closed.

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

So how do you end up in Austin?

[Matt Hyland]

We were living Clinton Hill, like, right from the restaurant. And then I was just like, I was born in New York and then lived in Connecticut for a few years. And then the next 20 years, I'm in New York again. So I never lived anywhere other than the city. So I want to leave. I think a lot of people during pandemic were just like, I'm leaving.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, change it up.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Matt Hyland]

Like, a lot of the New Yorkers went to Miami and Californians went to Austin. Didn't want to go to Miami. I was like, all right, let's go to Austin then. Yeah. Go where the Californians go. It's a city that I've always loved.

[Dax Shepard]

Great food, outrageously good food.

[Matt Hyland]

It's easy to get around. Everything's no more than 20 minutes away from everything else. So it's like a big time town that's just really friendly and cool.

[Monica Padman]

It is great.

[Dax Shepard]

And then how quickly do you decide, let's open a restaurant here?

[Matt Hyland]

Simone got pregnant again. We had our daughter.

[Dax Shepard]

You say it like you don't know how this happens.

[Matt Hyland]

I don't know.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Both times, like, she got pregnant.

[Monica Padman]

How she got pregnant.

[Matt Hyland]

So then we were really looking for Spaces for maybe a year. And then we stumbled upon this one that had a smoker in it. So we did some Chinese food with some smoked stuff, and then we opened the barbecue place. We met our pit master. His name is Jonathan Lagos from Terry Blacks.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, okay. Yeah.

[Matt Hyland]

So he was like one of the pit guys from there. He's like our Austin Sammy. He's like this big, gentle man.

[Dax Shepard]

Did you ever go to Lauro?

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah, I love Lauro.

[Dax Shepard]

I love Laurel. So I'm wondering, how are you and your Chinese wife fusing your backgrounds into one restaurant? Is it a hybrid?

[Matt Hyland]

We closed it, but the Chinese restaurant was sort of like a hybrid. I like cooking more Southeast Asian food, like Singaporean stuff, and she likes cooking more like Chinese and, like, French style. So we kind of just had some hybrid tiny dishes there.

[Dax Shepard]

But you were smoking meat too, so.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah, smoking meat. And then we had a little truck in the patio so you could get your barbecue there if you want or come in for some Chinese food. And then the sides for all the barbecue, we'd made homemade Chinese noodles with, like, queso on it and, like, Dan.

[Monica Padman]

Dan.

[Matt Hyland]

And like, instead of coming with that gross white bread, lago barbecue does we had, like, flaky rotis.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Does some part of you still want to create another thing?

[Matt Hyland]

I think going back to Amy squared should be fun now because I can focus on that and just reinvent the menu again. Our partner, Howard, just, like, if you were to rewrite this menu for 2026, not for 2016. What's the dishes? Yeah, and obviously being a different chef now and more mature. It's just like, lighter vegetable. When I left, everything just turned to, like, carbs in the appetizers. That's just too heavy.

[Dax Shepard]

Stay tuned for more armchair expert if you dare. This episode is sponsored by Best Better Help. Money. Stress is something almost everyone deals with at some point. And I think what's interesting is how rarely people talk about the emotional side of it. It's not just about the numbers. It can affect your sleep, your relationships, how you feel about yourself. There's a lot of shame wrapped up in financial stress that doesn't really get acknowledged. That's where therapy can be useful. Not to give you financial advice, but to help you work through the anxiety and the weight that comes with it. Unpacking your relationship with money, building better coping strategies, feeling less alone, alone in it. That's real, meaningful work. Betterhelp makes it easier to get started. They match you with a fully licensed therapist based on your needs. Over 30,000 therapists more than 6 million people served and a 4.9 out of 5 rating from over 1.7 million reviews. If your first match isn't right, you can switch anytime. When life feels overwhelming, therapy can help. Sign up and get 10% [e-mail] Dax that's better. H E L p.com Dax this episode is supported by Skims. Monica I have a question about your skims obsession.

[Monica Padman]

Well, I wouldn't really call it an obsession. It's more of a lifestyle choice.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, but here's the thing. There are like a thousand underwear brands out there. What makes skims the one you actually

[Monica Padman]

recommend to people because they fixed all the problems. I didn't even realize I was taught tolerating. Like I used to think it was normal for bras to be just kind of uncomfortable. You just kind of get used to feeling not good or underwear to just not really fit. Right? And then I tried skims and realized oh my gosh, it does not have to be this way.

[Dax Shepard]

So what's this new Everyday Cotton thing?

[Monica Padman]

Okay, it's their newest collection and honestly I just love it because it's so comfortable and breathable and it's not moving around your body. It fits properly and you want that in your underwear.

[Dax Shepard]

That's actually a really good pitch, which

[Monica Padman]

is why you should check it out. Shop Everyday Cotton and all of my favorite bras and [e-mail] after you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you select podcast in the survey and be sure to select our show in the drop down menu that follows.

[Matt Hyland]

There's no one like you and there never will be.

[Dax Shepard]

From the producer Bohemian Rhapsody There are many legends, but There is only one Michael. Rated PG13. In theaters April 24th. We are supported by Nordic Naturals. Okay, here's something that surprises me. More than 80% of Americans don't get enough omega 3s in their diet. And omega 3s, they're vital for your heart, brain, eyes, skin, joints, and the list goes on. That's where Nordic Naturals, the number one selling Omega 3 brand in the US comes in. Their Omega 3s are made from the purest ingredients, exceptionally fresh purified fish oil with a clean lemon taste. No fishy taste, no fishy burps. I take these every night. I do three right before bed. I've never had any kind of issue with a burp. They're pleasant to consume. Tens of thousands of studies link EPA and DHA to significant health benefits including heart, brain, immune, eye, mood, prenatal health and more. And every Nordic Natural supplement is carefully crafted to meet or exceed the strictest international quality standards and third party tested to ensure exceptional purity and freshness. Use promo code DAX for 15% off your next [e-mail] and discover the power of Omega 3 with Nordic Naturals, the number one selling Omega 3 brand in the U.S. these statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.

[Emily Hyland]

It's the right time for him to be back there. It feels like in the arc of this whole story, he's landed back there at the time and place it needs him and he's ready to help it come into the next wave of being.

[Matt Hyland]

I'm excited to open a chocolate store with Simone eventually, but that'll be more her project.

[Dax Shepard]

Who's on the food truck? Are you on the food truck ever?

[Matt Hyland]

Not usually. Like, I'll go up and visit every week or so.

[Dax Shepard]

You designed that menu and taught him how to make everything and then.

[Matt Hyland]

No, no, no. I mean, our pit guy taught. He's the man. Jonathan's barbecue savant. Simone and I just kind of came with the sides, basically. And then they started doing a burger. There's a really good burger place in Atlanta called nfa. This guy's name is Billy Kramer. Do you know NFA Burger from Atlanta? It's in Dunwoody.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, my God. I'm gonna go.

[Matt Hyland]

It started in a gas station. So Billy and I became friends and then we did a pop up in Austin with him. He's trained Jonathan and our other pick guy, Trevor, how to make a burger. Right? And then George Moats comes from Hamburger America and he starts training them how to do a burger. Right? And then our friend Cole from Dream Burger in Nashville comes, and then he starts teaching them how to make a burger. So the two of them, they have like these three master burger people.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, right.

[Matt Hyland]

And they're like, let's make our own based on what we learned.

[Monica Padman]

And it's.

[Matt Hyland]

It's pretty great. I don't make smash burgers. They want to do a smash burger. They put their onions on the smoker and, like, they made their own special sauce. So it's like a smoky, oniony.

[Dax Shepard]

Get to get out there. I have a rental car. I could do it.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah. So I have no notes for them. You guys do your burger the way you want them to.

[Dax Shepard]

My last question is, are you able to have some pride in what a successful thing it was even though it ended?

[Emily Hyland]

I mean, we're Sitting here together on

[Monica Padman]

this couch with you, that's impressive.

[Emily Hyland]

There was a very long time I didn't think we would ever be here in relationship. And now it just feels like we're family members who had a falling out and have come back together. And it feels really, really beautiful to co own and operate our baby together. Every breath gets us to where we are. And so everything that we've done together has informed how we've grown. And the amount of learning and resilience skills I've built through the process of navigating our divorce has allowed me to be the person I've become. And I'm forever grateful to that and just grateful for the love that we had in the way that we had it.

[Dax Shepard]

Birthed at restaurant and still stands. I would imagine it's kind of similar to, like when divorced parents are at graduation for. And they look at like, ah, fuck, look what we did.

[Monica Padman]

Yep.

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah. It feels very on point.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, you guys, this was lovely. It's so fun to meet the people who. We've never talked about a food item in our lives. Like our obsession with that fucking burger. I mean, the whole damn spread is beautiful. The fuck? And sometimes it's broccoli, sometimes it's cauliflower.

[Monica Padman]

Brussels sprout.

[Dax Shepard]

Brussels sprout appetizer. Good. Way to trick me into having some veggies.

[Monica Padman]

So good. You guys really made something very special.

[Emily Hyland]

Thank you.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Incredibly special. That will probably outlive all of us.

[Monica Padman]

So.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Emily Hyland]

And wait, we wanted to do something special for armchairies if you were game. We thought if anyone gets this far in the episode, we could have, like a code word that for the rest of the month after this episode comes out, they get a free dessert if they say the code word in the original.

[Monica Padman]

Absolutely.

[Dax Shepard]

We know what the code word is.

[Matt Hyland]

We do too.

[Emily Hyland]

Let's see.

[Matt Hyland]

Dolphin asparagus.

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah, we got was.

[Dax Shepard]

Look, it was gonna be that at reverse back. But dolphin asparagus is bad.

[Monica Padman]

I thought dolphin asparagus.

[Dax Shepard]

A dolphin asparagus.

[Matt Hyland]

That was wrong.

[Emily Hyland]

Told us earlier.

[Matt Hyland]

I didn't guess that.

[Dax Shepard]

Both are incredibly perverse. So either would work. The dolphin asparagus. I love that. So if you're an armchair and you're anywhere near enough, maybe they can order it.

[Monica Padman]

I'll have the dolphin asparagus.

[Emily Hyland]

Oh, there we go. Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

And it means the burger and a dessert.

[Emily Hyland]

So we'll say for the two weeks after this episode.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. That's more reasonable. Yeah, yeah.

[Emily Hyland]

If they say that at Emily Original.

[Monica Padman]

Emily Original.

[Emily Hyland]

They'll get dessert on the house.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. Clinton Hill, go to Emily. Semi original. Order the dolphin asparagus, and you're gonna get a dessert on the house. I love this.

[Emily Hyland]

And if you take a picture under Monica, you get extra credit.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. Queen Monica.

[Matt Hyland]

Beautiful picture there. Right in the waiting area.

[Monica Padman]

It's so nice. A lot of people will post that. That they're there.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, wait. Can I air a grievance? But I could be wrong.

[Emily Hyland]

Sure.

[Dax Shepard]

I believe I have to go next door and buy Diet Coke and smuggle it in. Do you guys have Diet Coke?

[Emily Hyland]

Probably.

[Dax Shepard]

You motherfuckers. What is with these restaurateers who think they shouldn't have Diet Coke? Is it that you're too classy? What's going on?

[Matt Hyland]

Of course. Really?

[Dax Shepard]

Why wouldn't you?

[Monica Padman]

I don't think New York is a big Diet Coke.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, I think it is.

[Matt Hyland]

Finance experts have Diet Coke. Our partner Howard, drinks Diet Coke.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, okay. Howard knows what's up.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah, he knows what's up.

[Dax Shepard]

But let's get Diet Coke at Emily so I don't have to go next door and smuggle it in.

[Emily Hyland]

I can accommodate that for you.

[Matt Hyland]

We gotta pull the dolphin asparagus coat

[Monica Padman]

to get your Diet Coke. That's right.

[Dax Shepard]

That'll be reversed back.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. Yeah. Geez, we have so many coats.

[Dax Shepard]

The staff's gonna be like, hold on a second. It's like learning the specials that night.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, exactly.

[Dax Shepard]

It's like. What is it? Oh, it's Diet Coke.

[Matt Hyland]

That's what we're saying. Diet Coke is a special diet.

[Dax Shepard]

We're serving Diet Coke tonight. Well, Emily and Matthew, this was wonderful. Thank you so much for coming.

[Monica Padman]

Thanks for coming. So great.

[Dax Shepard]

So fun. Everyone check out my Wise Little ghost. Of course, you could still get Emily the cookbook. It's still a great cookbook. Whether or not it was fraudulent in

[Monica Padman]

its messaging at the time, the recipes are still great.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Yeah. The recipes. Didn't know. So thanks for coming, you guys. This is great.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah. Thanks for having me.

[Emily Hyland]

Thank you.

[Dax Shepard]

Yep. We hope you enjoyed this episode. Unfortunately, they made some mistakes. I broke my phone yesterday. I cracked the phone.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. And so you're in a little bit grumpy.

[Dax Shepard]

No, I'm not grumpy at all.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, all right.

[Dax Shepard]

I cracked the screen, and it's crazy how much it hurts my feelings when that happens.

[Monica Padman]

Ah. How did it happen?

[Dax Shepard]

I was doing what I do often, which is try to save trips.

[Monica Padman]

Sure.

[Dax Shepard]

By carrying way too many things. I mean, I'm never going to learn this lesson. I'm 51.

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And I Will continue to try to reduce everything to one trip everywhere. So I was doing one of those. I was carrying a lot of different things from the sauna to somewhere else, and. Yeah. And it fell out of my hand. It didn't seem like a biggie. And then I looked and sure enough, crack city.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, man.

[Dax Shepard]

And I just go like, oh, it hurts more than it should. I mean, I think because it's your phone. And you immediately go, I'm gonna be without it. Or it's gonna be. I don't know. There's something interesting about it where. Yeah. I'm like, oh, I'm sad.

[Monica Padman]

I'm sorry.

[Dax Shepard]

I mean, that was yesterday.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, okay. But do you get sad every time you see it?

[Dax Shepard]

Well, I have an appointment at 12:45 to get it.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, great. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

So I'm on it, I'm on it.

[Monica Padman]

Nice. Are you going to the Americana?

[Dax Shepard]

I am.

[Monica Padman]

Nice, yes.

[Dax Shepard]

And then I'm gonna snoop around and I'm bad at this, but I keep asking Lincoln for birthday suggestions.

[Emily Hyland]

Oh, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Again, ultimately, I do interpret this as a great thing, which is like, when I was a kid, I wanted everything, but I keep. I'm like, Friday's going to come and, you know, I. I want to be able to give you something. She's like, oh, yeah, I have a list. But it's. I'm. I'll give it to you later. Like, it's just never. So I'm presuming it's going to take a minute to fix this.

[Matt Hyland]

This thing.

[Dax Shepard]

So I plan on perusing, which I never do, But I'm going to walk that Americana and see if something leaps out at me that Lincoln would like for her birthday.

[Monica Padman]

I can advise a little bit. The Americana, as much as I love it.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Shopping wise, it leaves a little to be desired.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

There's some, like, very fancy. Like, there's a Tiffany's there.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, okay. So I could buy her like a $4,000 tennis bracelet.

[Monica Padman]

You could ye that?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. I'm not going to, but I could.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, you could.

[Dax Shepard]

Tiffany's. Pricey, right?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, it is. But then they do have some, like, teen stores. I just don't think you want to go in there. It's like teen clothes stores and, like, I'm in there. Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I don't know if it's like other 13 year olds. Would you like this?

[Monica Padman]

Exactly.

[Dax Shepard]

When I really am just trying to find something for my daughter.

[Monica Padman]

I know.

[Dax Shepard]

But then I get tagged. Tackled by a father from behind.

[Monica Padman]

That's right.

[Dax Shepard]

Would you feel cute in this.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, do you think this is flattering on a body like yours?

[Dax Shepard]

But you could really be a totally above board in the questions. That. I could sound horrendous.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, you really could. Also, like, the lighting in those stores really hurts my eyes.

[Dax Shepard]

It hurts your eyes.

[Monica Padman]

And there's something. I'm like, kids are way. You know, it's when you really feel very old, where you're just like, oh, no, this is what they're wearing now.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. So is it too bright is your issue?

[Monica Padman]

That's part of it.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. And then the clothes, you're like, I don't relate.

[Monica Padman]

I'm just like, scared of the clothes. Well, I'm not scared of the youth.

[Dax Shepard]

I would never.

[Monica Padman]

With clothes.

[Dax Shepard]

That's a stupid.

[Monica Padman]

Right.

[Dax Shepard]

And also, I remember sweet grandparents would get me clothes. And then everyone's in a bad position because you feel terrible and you got to act like you love the sweater granddad picked out for you.

[Monica Padman]

A.

[Dax Shepard]

And I'm. That's. That's what would be the case. I'd be like, I thought this was rad. Although she is wearing all my old punk rock T shirts.

[Monica Padman]

You could get a vintage shirt. They won't be at the Americana.

[Dax Shepard]

No, sir. There's nothing old there. It's all new.

[Monica Padman]

But there are vintage stores other places in the city.

[Dax Shepard]

I told you about. This is a long standing grievance. I told you about the one time I was at the Americana. Also, for the listener, I'm in a mall maybe once every two or three years.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I am never there.

[Monica Padman]

I know.

[Dax Shepard]

So I went to see a film at that AMC at the Americana, and I walked by the Golden Goose store or whatever it is.

[Matt Hyland]

The.

[Dax Shepard]

The shoes.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, sure. Yeah, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

CG And a pair of shoes leapt out from the window at me.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

And I walked in. Do you have that in 11 and a half? Oh, yeah, we do. Great. I'll take them.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, and then try them on.

[Dax Shepard]

Great. Let me sign you up for a. An account.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

What's your email and address? And I said, oh, I. I don't. Or a membership or something? And I said, oh, I don't want a membership. I just want to pay. And she goes, well, you have to. You have to sign up for a membership. And I said, you won't. You won't sell this to me unless I enroll in some program. And she said, yeah, like, it won't even let me. And I'm like, okay, thank you. And then I left.

[Emily Hyland]

Right.

[Dax Shepard]

And I was like, is that what

[Monica Padman]

we've come to a membership I've never had to do.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, good, we're on grievances. I got another one. And maybe I've already aired it on here before. Stop asking me to rate everything. I'm so fucking sick of. I go to use something, I want to use my food delivery app, and first I got to be asked to rate it, and then I got to go to you. You don't need me to rate YouTube and all these things. Enough. You don't mind. I can see on your face you're not bothered by me. It's a pop up screen. You got to go through.

[Monica Padman]

I don't understand. I just X out of that. But on doordash and stuff, I click it because I, you know, I want the person to get their five stars.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, but, and also you would think if you rated it once, that would be it for the rest of your life. Like, what are you gonna rate it every week? Is it a daily rating? But it keeps popping up. Cause also if you go, oh, fuck it, okay, I'll give you five stars. And then it says, and then a new screen comes up. Would you like to write a review?

[Monica Padman]

Right. And you said no.

[Dax Shepard]

I know, but I. Oh, wow. Why does everyone need to get reviewed all the time? Just let me use the service that I'm paying, paying for and, and don't ask me to review or you go to the doctor. There's three email follow ups. How was your visit? Please rate your visit.

[Monica Padman]

I know, I just ignore it.

[Dax Shepard]

I know, but it's a lot of traffic that doesn't need to be there. No one needs to rate.

[Monica Padman]

Okay, well, they want to know if they did a good job.

[Dax Shepard]

Rob, do you like rating stuff?

[Matt Hyland]

No, I hate it.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. The screens bother you?

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah, yeah. I'm always in skip and I get

[Dax Shepard]

pissed because, okay, great, I'm not crazy. And then also the gas station, here's another one. You go to the pump and it's like, do you want to sign up for a membership? No. Do you want a car wash? No. Do you want a receipt? No. And at some point you just want to go, I want gas. That's why I came here, for gasoline.

[Monica Padman]

It's frustrating. It is indeed frustrating. I don't have any grievances. Oh, oh, you probably have a grievance about that. Let's see. Let me get out of here. Let me do. Let's do a do not disturb, do not D, D and D. Please rate

[Dax Shepard]

the rejection of this call. Was that, was it easy to use? Five star. Okay.

[Monica Padman]

So it was easy.

[Dax Shepard]

Five stars to reject that.

[Monica Padman]

Totally. Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, let's. Let me, let me add some positives.

[Monica Padman]

Let's. Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

They have made it easy because I get so many junk text messages. I get like you would think I have a credit score of 0. I get about 15 texts from different numbers every day. Yeah. From debt collectors. They're not real debt collectors.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

They're trying to trick you into something.

[Monica Padman]

Yes. Scams.

[Dax Shepard]

And what I like now is you can just slide to erase and it says delete and report junk. One button.

[Monica Padman]

Love that.

[Dax Shepard]

Boom, boom, boom. I love that.

[Monica Padman]

Wow.

[Dax Shepard]

Because I want the junk reported. I want to save other, other people from it. And so that feature I love.

[Monica Padman]

Great.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Congratulations.

[Monica Padman]

Positive of technology.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Monica Padman]

I worked out again.

[Dax Shepard]

How'd it go?

[Monica Padman]

I think well.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

So I'm just getting huge.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm just getting jacked over here.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. I'm really swole.

[Dax Shepard]

And you spend a lot of time in front of the mirror. I look for how long?

[Monica Padman]

Not very long, but I look just to see, like how are my, my gains?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, your giants.

[Monica Padman]

Big. I showed you yesterday. This you can't see. I'm wearing kind of a long.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm surprised you're not wearing a tank top to show off the gunners.

[Monica Padman]

No. Like I am a sore also, obviously.

[Dax Shepard]

But what part are you soaring?

[Monica Padman]

I'm sore here.

[Dax Shepard]

Tricep.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. Because I did that yesterday.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Good. It's a good feeling, isn't it?

[Monica Padman]

It is. It is. It is. Yes. I, I will say I do prefer the feeling after cardio than I do the feeling after weight training. But that's why I'll just have to do both.

[Dax Shepard]

They're time horizons really. So after cardio you do get an endorphin blast for sure. But the muscle thing is a less spiked, much more protracted, like that feeling of tightness all day is this, this gentle mental reminder like, oh yeah, I pushed myself, I pushed myself. It's such a steam building. Just all day, gentle reminder, like, oh yeah, I push myself.

[Emily Hyland]

Huh?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

So it's not like the endorphin spike, but it is, it is a real elevated self esteem for a lot of people.

[Monica Padman]

For me. Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

For Kamal, I know that's what he experiences about it.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

So I'm in a tricky situ. This is going to get really esoteric. So my leathers that I'll be riding

[Monica Padman]

in on Monday, that's the outfit you wear to.

[Dax Shepard]

It's a full leather body suit. It was made for me. It's a gorgeous Suit.

[Monica Padman]

You've seen it.

[Dax Shepard]

It's got arm cherries. It's got cherries on the arms. It's got a little homage to Nikki Hayden, my friend who used to race. There's a lot of great. They're awesome. I would never want another pair of leathers. The problem is they were made for me when I was 1 185.

[Monica Padman]

Oh.

[Dax Shepard]

And not only was I 185, I just had a completely different body composition.

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

So we have had the suit let out like three times. It has been sent. I don't know if it gets sent to Italy or what, but Alpine Stars has. Who made the suit. They have adjusted it three times. And the lower half, that was the killer is my thighs got way big. My thighs got like 30% bigger and I could barely get them in the suit.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

So those were, were fixed.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

But now it's the. My biceps and my arms. The. It's so tight. Cuz I just rode three weeks ago and I'm like, I. So tight. I can barely feel my hands.

[Monica Padman]

That's not good. You need to have mobility.

[Dax Shepard]

So. Okay. Now here's my Sophie's Choice.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

This is the. Cannot believe I'm going to admit this out loud on the show. So I will likely wave the checkered flag at the race. Oh, I did last year.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

And I, I hadn't planned it last year. I just. They asked me to wave the checkered flag and I did.

[Monica Padman]

Which starts the show.

[Dax Shepard]

No, it's the end of the race. The winner. I'm sorry, I'm like, I'm in the tower as they come across the finish line. I'm waving the checkered flag.

[Monica Padman]

Cool. And as this is for the race. MotoGP, not the thing you're riding in.

[Dax Shepard]

Nope.

[Monica Padman]

Got it.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. There's a MotoG GP, the Formula 1 of motorcycles is on Saturday and Sunday.

[Monica Padman]

Yes. Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Sprint on Saturday.

[Monica Padman]

And that's like a legit. That's on tv. That's like a thing you're gonna, you're gonna wave.

[Dax Shepard]

And last year I was on tv.

[Monica Padman]

Got it.

[Dax Shepard]

Waving the flag.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. I see.

[Dax Shepard]

And I'm gonna tell you egomaniacally and with all vanity, I noticed when I was waving the flag. Oh, your bicep looks awesome.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, wow. Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

It really like you couldn't miss it.

[Emily Hyland]

Uh huh.

[Dax Shepard]

And I was like, oh, this is great. I love people commented.

[Monica Padman]

I'm sure they did.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. So now I'm kind of addicted to that reaction.

[Monica Padman]

Oh no.

[Dax Shepard]

So I don't want to do arms for, like, a week because I'm going to ride, but I also want to do arms, like, the day before I have to wave the flags. My biceps look great.

[Monica Padman]

Uh, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Which one?

[Monica Padman]

No, you need to be able to ride your motorcycles.

[Dax Shepard]

I think I'm going to pick the flagway.

[Monica Padman]

Dax, this isn't funny, actually, because. No, no, because you could fall.

[Dax Shepard]

No, no. It doesn't hamper my ability to ride the motorcycle.

[Monica Padman]

How do. Of course it does. If you're like, I can't even. Like, you can't even move.

[Dax Shepard]

This is uncomfortable.

[Matt Hyland]

I think your arms are huge. A week off.

[Monica Padman]

Exactly. Thank you, Rob.

[Matt Hyland]

It's not going to change the most.

[Dax Shepard]

Rob, you need to look up the video of me waving the flag. You might change your mind. But how long ago was that?

[Monica Padman]

You not breaking your neck?

[Matt Hyland]

How long ago was that, too? If your arms are too big for the suit, that means they're still bigger than then.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, no, they were too big for my suit last.

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah, but if they're bigger now, too,

[Dax Shepard]

why is it sickening that you're gonna

[Monica Padman]

prioritize that over your, like, potential?

[Dax Shepard]

My comfort. You're making it about safety. There's no safety. There is no safety issue.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

I can ride the motorcycle whether they're tight or not. How do you know it's a comfort issue? It's very uncomfortable.

[Monica Padman]

Don't you need to be comfortable if you're gonna be nimble on the bike?

[Dax Shepard]

No, you don't have to be comfortable. You don't. It's just like, you could raise a car in an uncomfortable seat or a comfortable seat.

[Monica Padman]

If you're a gymnast and you're in a a, you're in, like, high heels. Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I would impede your performance a lot. This won't impede my performance. It's just uncomfortable. And then I'll add to determines whether or not I come in and out of the suit. So in between sessions, it's also Texas, so it's going to be, like, 95 degrees. Right. It'll be hot. I'll be sweating bullets. And when you come off the track on my 30 minutes of downtime, I kind of want to take my arms out of the suit. Now we get into my shoulder issues. This is another thing. With all the surgeries getting in this, it's. The whole thing's a little rough. So then I'll just end up kind of staining in the suit in between dehydrating. No, I drink a ton of water. There's no hydration issues. You know, I drink A ton of water.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. But you're not drinking electrolytes like I tell you.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, I drink. I drink Gatorade when I'm at the track. Oh, yeah.

[Monica Padman]

All right. I just. And you're going to get a uti. Cuz you can't take it off. Cuz you'll. You can't pee.

[Dax Shepard]

No, no, I can unzip it down to my weenus, which I do. And then. But I do have to pull the whole package up over the leathers and then the zippers down there. And so that's a whole.

[Monica Padman]

If it's tight, it's going to. It might cut off your entire package again.

[Dax Shepard]

That hasn't. That's not affected by the size of my arms. I wish it was.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, yeah, well. Oh, my God. I just. I just. It. It is body dysmorphia that you can't see that, like, your arms are. Are, as Rob just said, huge.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

And with. Or.

[Dax Shepard]

I can see that.

[Monica Padman]

With or without you doing more.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, that's his maintenance. I'm not like, I'm trying to do.

[Monica Padman]

In one week your arm's gonna look like mine or something.

[Dax Shepard]

No, I don't.

[Monica Padman]

By the way. Mine are pretty swollen. You'd be excited.

[Dax Shepard]

They do look different when I've pumped in when I haven't. I mean, that's just. That's.

[Monica Padman]

They look huge if you haven't. Yeah, that's the whole thing. So you don't have to.

[Dax Shepard]

I know. So you. You probably have like a shirt that. And then you might have a blazer you like to put on over. And I could be telling you it. The shirt alone looks great. And you're like, yeah, it does. It looks great. I. I prefer it. My thing is, I want to look great with the blazer and the shirt.

[Monica Padman]

I know, but if the blazer was a detriment.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, please pursue this line of thinking because you and I both know you operate in grave discomfort. To go on the carpet with the super high heels and the dress that's too tight. And you've told me I can't breathe.

[Monica Padman]

I fucking hate. Hate it.

[Dax Shepard]

Yes. So you do it for.

[Monica Padman]

For the picture.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Not for safe. Not for Then me to go do something that's like, safety. It's going to impact my safety.

[Dax Shepard]

These are one for one.

[Monica Padman]

No, they're really not. They're really not. Because you're riding the motorcycle. I feel you need to be in. You need to be capable of like. Like doing that if you're about to fly off or something.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, you're not. You're not listening to me. There's. This doesn't at all augment my safety.

[Monica Padman]

How could it not?

[Dax Shepard]

Because. Because I'm uncomfortable doesn't mean I can't operate it exactly the same.

[Monica Padman]

Can you lift your arms all the way up in it? You can, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

It's just like when you're wearing an extremely tight dress, you're like, oh, this is uncomfortable.

[Monica Padman]

Right.

[Dax Shepard]

So you prioritize your look over discomfort often.

[Monica Padman]

Well, okay. I'm going to say one thing.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

I actually am some. Somewhere in the middle. I don't wear, like, a super high. Sometimes I look around and I'm like, how are they doing that? I can't. I will look like an idiot. Like, I will. Won't be able to really do it. So I. I do prioritize some level of comfort and style.

[Dax Shepard]

But I've been with you when you're like, oh, I can't breathe in this, or my feet hurt.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, yeah, my feet always hurt. But even if.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, so. So we. We relate. We. We. We know what it's like to be willing to experience discomfort so that we look a certain way.

[Monica Padman]

Sure. I'll give you that. I'm more. I'm not. I don't care about the day of the trailer.

[Dax Shepard]

You want it to be a safety issue, but it's not. There's no safety issue. It's a discomfort one. And I'm acknowledging. Even that's preposterous. I am acknowledging that I want my arms to look a certain way on tv and I'm willing to be uncomfortable for a whole day at the track.

[Monica Padman]

Can I tell you something that's different?

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

Me in a flat shoe on the red carpet. Carpet legitimately looks. I can't. I feel bad because somebody's wearing a flat shoe on the record. They probably look great in it.

[Dax Shepard]

And by the way, it's just a subjective. Monica, you're saying. You're saying to me, the. The thing I noticed the difference in is not real. And. And you're saying the thing you notice a difference in is real. And I'm saying plenty of people would think you would look just as great not in heels. On the red carpet.

[Monica Padman]

Dina, who's not the fashion police.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, great.

[Monica Padman]

There's, like, a legit amount. There's, like, people who look at your outfit and scour it and chic. That's not why they do this. Why did they do this? And so for. You do have to look sore. You don't have to. You don't have to.

[Dax Shepard]

I mean, they're identical things. We both want to look a certain way, and we're both willing to be uncomfortable to look a certain way.

[Monica Padman]

I guess I just don't think the judgment.

[Dax Shepard]

I mean, you're the only one. I'm not judging you for what's happening on the red carpet at all.

[Monica Padman]

Judgment. I'm saying. I'm saying the judgment from. From the outside world. I don't think the outside world is gonna see you waving the flag with or without the pump and think much different.

[Dax Shepard]

You. I know you think that just like, because you're not a dude. And. And I think people wouldn't say she looks crazy without high heels on. So we both think that.

[Monica Padman]

But Rob is a. And Rob said. Said that your arms will look huge regardless.

[Dax Shepard]

They will look big. Could they look bigger? Yes. You will look very cute. Can you look cuter? Sure.

[Matt Hyland]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

I mean, these are just. They're really tit for tip.

[Monica Padman]

They are. And I mean, maybe. Yeah, maybe I just don't understand that thing. But they are different. Like heels. Do something to your leg shape. Like it's not like in veins sticking

[Dax Shepard]

out of your bicep. Do something to what they look like on tv.

[Monica Padman]

Sure.

[Dax Shepard]

I mean, they're noticeable.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

We do the same thing.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. Okay. I just. I. On a. You're. That's fine. As long as it's not a safety thing you do.

[Dax Shepard]

It's just massive discomfort, which I am willing to own. I'm happy to own that. That's preposterous. Stay tuned for more armchair expert if you dare. This episode is brought to you by Peacock with the new original series, the Miniature Wife.

[Monica Padman]

Ding, ding, ding.

[Dax Shepard]

You love that title. Okay, so this is a pretty wild premise for a relationship story. Elizabeth banks and Matthew McFaddy and star in the new Peacock original series, the Miniature Wife. Banks plays Lindy, a prize winning novelist with a 15 year writer's block. Macfadian plays Les, a scientist set on achieving greatness by revolutionizing agriculture with shrinking technology. Their love story has one little problem. An outlandish battle of the spouses ensues when Les accidentally shrinks Lindy down to 6 inches tall. Les and Lindy are forced to face their issues in a big way. OT Fagbenle and Zoe Lister Jones also star as oddball scientists. Asif Monvi plays Les's long suffering business partner. Ronnie Chang plays a big shot investor. And Shawn Clifford plays Lindy's book editor. Underneath the absurdism and screwball comedy is a relationship about ambition. Power struggles, jealousy. And what happens when you feel small for far too long. The Miniature wife is streaming April 9th only on Peacock. I admitted the other day I thought when I was down in Florida for Rat Diddy.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I was like, oh, we're looking too big.

[Monica Padman]

Right?

[Dax Shepard]

But then I was like, but it kind of works for that character. But I don't want to look that big. So I don't think I have full dysmorphia. I think I face dysmorphia for sure. I don't think I see what my face looks like at all.

[Monica Padman]

How do we know, you know, this

[Dax Shepard]

is where AI could help us?

[Monica Padman]

I think this is like. This is like, you know, the age old. What color are you seeing versus what color am I seeing?

[Dax Shepard]

Huh?

[Monica Padman]

You know, it's like there's literally. There's no way to know. And not to mention that we're adding in everything small, subjective. Like, everything looks good. Something looks good to one person. Exactly.

[Dax Shepard]

Someone's like, I hate muscles. Someone's like, I love muscles.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. This is a whole.

[Dax Shepard]

I love big noses. I hate big noses.

[Monica Padman]

Right. It's all subjective and there's a couple consistent ones.

[Dax Shepard]

Thank you.

[Monica Padman]

Well, yeah, there. I mean, there are people that everyone can universally agree on.

[Dax Shepard]

No one's like, I hate perky breasts. I've never heard that in my life. I've been along around for a long time. Long time. I've heard I hate big dicks.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, but you've also.

[Dax Shepard]

I've never heard, it's like I hate

[Monica Padman]

perky, but some people probably hate big breasts.

[Dax Shepard]

That's why I said perky.

[Monica Padman]

I know, but like it's of course a perky if they're non existent.

[Dax Shepard]

The male equivalent. I've never heard someone say like, I hate how wide his shoulders are.

[Monica Padman]

I could see someone saying that depending on who the person is. I actually could see myself saying that about.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, really? I don't like wide shoulders.

[Monica Padman]

Remember I told you you sometimes like. But that sometimes it's too much.

[Dax Shepard]

That's a different thing though, right? That's too muscular. Not soft. Yeah, but just the frame of a man having wide shoulders.

[Monica Padman]

The silhouette as big as this room. That's too big.

[Dax Shepard]

I'd love to meet the person who had shoulders.

[Monica Padman]

I don't want to meet them. I'm scared of them. Oh my God. Did you hear about this basketball player who's like seven, eight or something? He's so tall. Everyone was talking about, this is Charlie's birthday party and college player.

[Dax Shepard]

Or he.

[Monica Padman]

Rob, do you Know about him? No. Okay, look him up. He's like, I think Romanian. Like 16 or something. Or 18.

[Dax Shepard]

Shaq 2.0.

[Matt Hyland]

I was going to say heights. Probably the biggest comm.

[Monica Padman]

He's taller than Shaq.

[Matt Hyland]

Okay. 7 foot 9. Oliver Roo says sound right.

[Monica Padman]

That sounds right. Is he, like, a young kid?

[Matt Hyland]

Let me. Yeah, he's in college.

[Dax Shepard]

The whole thing is. There's been plenty.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, that's him. That guy is, like, 7ft tall. The one next to him.

[Dax Shepard]

No.

[Monica Padman]

Yes. We were doing this. We were doing this. I don't know exact. No, I promise you, it's, like, shocking.

[Matt Hyland]

He's 20.

[Dax Shepard]

I want to watch this kid play Florida.

[Matt Hyland]

I know.

[Monica Padman]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

Are they in the.

[Monica Padman]

Look at him.

[Dax Shepard]

Holy schnikes for the listener. He's standing with his teammates, all of them. And presumably they're all above 6ft tall. They're all below his shoulders.

[Monica Padman]

These are tall men. These are basketball players.

[Emily Hyland]

And.

[Monica Padman]

And he is.

[Dax Shepard]

And he's behind them, which. That also makes him smaller in the photo.

[Monica Padman]

And remember, like. Oh, my God. Like, that guy's your height.

[Dax Shepard]

No, he's not.

[Monica Padman]

Yes, he is.

[Dax Shepard]

That guy's five, seven.

[Monica Padman]

No, he's not.

[Dax Shepard]

That's why they put him in the picture.

[Monica Padman]

This is what we've talked about. Remember?

[Dax Shepard]

How disproportionate.

[Monica Padman]

Yes. After you hit six feet.

[Matt Hyland]

No, here's.

[Dax Shepard]

Here with you.

[Monica Padman]

No. Oh, she's five.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, that guy's five, seven. Because that guy's. She's at his elbow.

[Monica Padman]

She's taller than me. Like, listen.

[Dax Shepard]

One inch taller.

[Monica Padman]

But this.

[Dax Shepard]

This guy really is five.

[Monica Padman]

This guy is. Is over. Okay. Once you hit six feet, the theory is, in this room, each inch.

[Dax Shepard]

We think after six, four.

[Monica Padman]

No, I think it's after six feet. I think. Yes. I think you look much taller than someone who. Who's just 6ft.

[Dax Shepard]

And you're only over someone that's 6ft and 5. 10. Yeah. When someone's 6ft and 5' 10, you can almost not tell.

[Monica Padman]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Okay, I'm. I'm on your. What is he standing on the ground?

[Monica Padman]

I want to. I need a picture next to him so badly, you guys.

[Dax Shepard]

He's holding the rim and is. Honestly, his feet are a centimeter off the ground. Oh, my God.

[Monica Padman]

I feel like I could. You know when you're baby. And you, like, put your arm around your dad's leg and you're, like, under his knee and you're just, like, holding onto his leg? I feel like I'm. That for him.

[Dax Shepard]

You might be right at Nuts level for him.

[Monica Padman]

I'm under his knee. I think I'm just holding on to his little leg and I just want to meet him.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, can I switch the topic to psa? Because I think this is a long, fun, healing journey for me. So I have traveled once since.

[Matt Hyland]

Since the.

[Dax Shepard]

They have stopped getting paid, and I'm about to travel again. These people have not been paid for one month, and they've continued to come to work. I am so in awe of them and I admire what they're doing. And I thanked all of them when I was going through the airport. But more than that, it was driving me nuts when I was leaving New Orleans, I'm like, I want to bring a five gallon bucket from Home Depot. And I want to stand up and go like, hey, I'm putting a grain brand in here.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, that's Nice.

[Dax Shepard]

Everyone dropped 20 as you go through. Like, these people should get paid something nice. And I'm like, is that allowed? I got really hung up on, like, can you do that? Is that allowed? Then I'm. Then I'm past security. Now what? There's a bucket there. No one's making the announcement.

[Monica Padman]

People might take from it.

[Dax Shepard]

Some would take it. Is the TSA allowed? They can't make an announcement. Hey, put money in here. So I'm like, do I put a sign on there? I got really bogged down with, how can I make this happen? So, of course I'm about to go to the airport on Saturday. I'm having the same thought. I'm like, I want to bring money and grease everyone I see. So guess what? Elon Musk offered to pay for all of their one month of salary out of his own pocket.

[Monica Padman]

The whole country.

[Dax Shepard]

Yes. He offered the White House. He's like, let me pay these people's salary while you guys fight over, oh,

[Monica Padman]

right, because, like, we need the airports to function.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And I was like, oh, thank God. And he's someone who could really just write a check for all of them.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And they turned it down.

[Monica Padman]

Really?

[Matt Hyland]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And it makes me. It drives me nuts.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. Is there, like, rules? Because they're government employees.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Somehow the explanation was like, that somehow he would be liable for something. And I'm like, why don't they? I'm like, we are so bogged down in bullsh. Phoney red tape. It's like, these people need to get paid.

[Monica Padman]

Could maybe do it, like, maybe like you.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, he's an individual, but he was

[Monica Padman]

gonna do it through the government.

[Dax Shepard]

No, he just said, I'll write a check to every tsa, give me their names and I'll pay. Everyone's past four weeks that they haven't been getting paid.

[Matt Hyland]

It says it's because of his various government contracts that he's not allowed to do it.

[Monica Padman]

Cause he's technically. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, maybe then Jeff Bezos should do it. Like someone who.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, he probably has government contracts. I'm sure they cloud compute for the government.

[Monica Padman]

Right. Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, I just hate when like something great could happen.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And everyone's gonna. Because of political reasons or they don't wanna be affiliated with Elon. It's like, take his fucking money and pay these people.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, yeah, for sure.

[Dax Shepard]

Just whatever the bullshit is. It's like we have an opportunity to pay these people who've been working for a month for free. How are they paying their bills? A lot of them are not showing up to work. Cause they have other jobs.

[Monica Padman]

Exactly. I know, it's horrible. Maybe, I mean, you could just give some to the people you see. I mean, I know it's not the same.

[Dax Shepard]

That is what I'm gonna do. But also what I wish was somehow we could all collectively, like, put a fucking bucket out. If everyone dropped 20 bucks who went through the search, that would cover their salary for the day. Tens of thousands of people go through lax, Huh. I don't know how to organize this, but it drives me nuts. And I would be happy, happy to pay while. While they're not getting paid.

[Monica Padman]

Well, we could try to start something where we started on this show. We.

[Dax Shepard]

Everyone bring a bucket. What if it was just there's so many pyramid of buckets and then that became its own problem why flights weren't getting out.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, exactly.

[Dax Shepard]

And just the idea that like ICE is coming in with zero training to. There's no way they're going to help speed things up. You know, they've been deployed to. To. To cover the gaps. It's like, what could be worse in the speed of the airport than a trainee?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Basically this. What a bad plan.

[Matt Hyland]

They're like, put him at the exits. Because they said that's an issue.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, okay. Which is?

[Matt Hyland]

Which is not.

[Dax Shepard]

I don't know. Exiting the airport is an issue. Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

I think maybe if you have the means and you have some extra cash. Maybe if you can just give it to your tsa.

[Dax Shepard]

I wonder if they would get in trouble. Like, I wonder if they're forbidden to take money. Because look, it could look like, what, did they just bribe him? He's not pre. He doesn't Have a real passport. His license is not good.

[Monica Padman]

He got something through.

[Dax Shepard]

Exactly. They're gonna turn a blind eye. Yeah. It would be a terrible policy to allow TSA employees to accept money from people.

[Monica Padman]

I didn't even think about that.

[Dax Shepard]

But if it's anonymous in a bucket, then no one's getting any fair. You know, unfair. Whatever. I don't know. What I know is we shanta accept this. This is nuts.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. I have an idea.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

You could host a gala.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

Cuz I'd like to come.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

And I'll wear my suit.

[Dax Shepard]

I'll wear my leathers. I'll do arms. Right before I put my leathers.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. That I feel fine about. I'm not worried about your safety there. And, and then we can raise money at the gala for, for these workers. And like, then you can do what Elon was going to do. Then we have all the money. And like, you can just write these checks. Howard can help your business manager.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. I mean, I, I wish I had started thinking about this four weeks ago because I do think by the time we pull off this gal and distribute the funds, it will be sorted out.

[Monica Padman]

Then we can keep the money going.

[Dax Shepard]

To knock on wood. Before I say this, because I know this is going to make you nervous, but I did just think of what would be the most hilarious outcome to this whole debate about the suit is. Next. Fact check. I'm in a sling.

[Monica Padman]

Stop. I've already.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm in a sling and I'm still in the suit because I can't do.

[Monica Padman]

Oh my God. What do you think I'm imagining when we are talking about this? You're so arrogant to think that, like, someone's tight, tight, tight, tight leotard isn't going to affect their twists. It does.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, hold on a second. I ride them. I, I, I know I've ridden with arms that are tight and arms that are not. So you're going to have to trust me that I know.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. And it doesn't affect it. If anything, it might give me more stability. It's just incredibly uncomfortable. That is the issue. It's very uncomfortable.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

And it's hard to get in and out of the suit. It would be like, grab a sleeve and, you know, there's like a lot of teamwork to get us in and out of these.

[Monica Padman]

It is like it is getting ready for a red carpet.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Like cinching each other's girdles up or whatever.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Us getting in and out of our suits is quite. That's the Hardest part of the day. I can't relate at all to what you guys are going through with the shoes. And, I mean, I just simply. I wouldn't do it. I. I know me. I wouldn't do it. I can barely even wear the goddamn dress shoes. But the one thing that is borderline that I deal with as a man is like, your collar on your neck of your shirt with the top in an Adam's apple. And I swallow it and it. It wants to go below that line, and it's too tight for my Adam's apple to go down into that.

[Monica Padman]

Your shirt's too tight, but they.

[Dax Shepard]

Again, to look good. You can't have a gappy collar. That's a huge. No.

[Matt Hyland]

No.

[Dax Shepard]

For guys like. That's got to look tightened up and the tie's got to be tight. You can't have a. You can't be swimming in your collar.

[Monica Padman]

It looks terrible.

[Dax Shepard]

James Bond's never been swimming in his collar.

[Monica Padman]

You're right. I just. The problem is it also. You run the risk. We've about talked. Talked about this. The neck on a man in a suit is tricky.

[Dax Shepard]

Is everything.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. Because it can make someone look very stocky.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, okay.

[Monica Padman]

It has. It runs a risk.

[Dax Shepard]

I want to see.

[Monica Padman]

I'm looking up a lord right now

[Dax Shepard]

for my favorite actor to be. What did he. What happened to him? He did good.

[Monica Padman]

No, he looks great. And, like, you're right. It's flush with his neck.

[Dax Shepard]

There can't be any visible gap between the collar and your neck.

[Monica Padman]

It's not a good look, but it's not stocky. It's like. It's long and it's.

[Dax Shepard]

He also has a very elegant neck. You picked a gray. If you look at Statham, I was trying to think of my favorite actor, and I can't believe I can never remember his name. It's like. It's so weird to me.

[Monica Padman]

Jack Reacher.

[Matt Hyland]

No.

[Monica Padman]

Speaking of, that's really as. Yesterday when I was working out, I had a podcast on and they talked about that.

[Dax Shepard]

It got to you.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, it finally got to me after it got to me.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Yeah. No, Mobland. Tom Hardy.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I struggle with his name.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. It's a pretty standard name.

[Dax Shepard]

I love him. I love him so much. I started Mobland over again yesterday.

[Monica Padman]

Wow.

[Dax Shepard]

But I can't imagine what he's dealing with with a collar.

[Monica Padman]

No. But Dax. Look, look.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, who do we got?

[Monica Padman]

This is him. And his collar's not for him. Right.

[Matt Hyland]

See?

[Dax Shepard]

Great. I'm glad you just found this. He can't even have a collar tight to him.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, but you just isn't that.

[Dax Shepard]

I kind of knew. He doesn't have a goddamn choice. Oh, there he goes.

[Monica Padman]

Okay, that's.

[Dax Shepard]

God, he is so fucking hot. Look at his eyes. Oh, my God.

[Monica Padman]

Anyway, I think everyone should look exactly how they want to look.

[Dax Shepard]

Me too. And do the best you can with what you got. That's what I'm saying.

[Monica Padman]

Do whatever you want, you know, do whatever you want. But I do think maybe if it's hurting your attitude. Adam's apple.

[Dax Shepard]

I gotta live with it. You know, it's like an hour of my life once a year.

[Monica Padman]

What about if we undo this button?

[Dax Shepard]

Well, I've had to do that. Similar to my leathers. Also, all my dress shirts were made at a certain era of my life. And then I stopped acting, so I wasn't accumulating any more dress shirts. So I was having to put braces rubber band in the fucking hole and then around the button. So little did anyone know there was an elastic.

[Monica Padman]

He sometimes keeps his shirt. But that's not.

[Dax Shepard]

But that's not. That's not a tie. When once you throw a tie into the mix.

[Monica Padman]

He. He's wearing a bow tie. Maybe you should take the tie out.

[Dax Shepard]

I. I've done bow tie. I don't like bow tie. I don't understand what the.

[Monica Padman]

That thing is nice.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm like, what is this is like.

[Monica Padman]

It feels like something you'd like because it's kind of like. It's a little femme in a cute way.

[Dax Shepard]

Is this like, what. It's a bow.

[Monica Padman]

It's so cute. Dax.

[Dax Shepard]

Dax. You're trying to show me your Facebook login page?

[Monica Padman]

This is a tick. Is it?

[Dax Shepard]

He has a TikTok.

[Monica Padman]

No, this is somebody else. Tarot cat. I just googled it.

[Dax Shepard]

Jacob Elordi. You can, but you could be showing me videos of Elordi in a potato sack. He's gonna look awesome and better than I look.

[Monica Padman]

No, that's not true.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, yes, he look. He's significantly better looking than me. No, that's good for him.

[Monica Padman]

He's like your height.

[Dax Shepard]

He's taller.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Remember he made me look like a little.

[Monica Padman]

I forgot.

[Dax Shepard]

He made me look like that 5 foot 4 guy next to the basketball player.

[Monica Padman]

Wait for you to be next to him.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, weird.

[Monica Padman]

The tall guy.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, let's do some facts.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. Emily Burger.

[Dax Shepard]

Interesting episode.

[Monica Padman]

Our favorite burgie used the sauce last night. What'd you put it on?

[Dax Shepard]

Shout out to Burger Lounge. They have a paleo option now. That I'm not with cheese.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

It's brutal to have to remove cheese from stuff.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I also went to Yucca's Taco Shack yesterday.

[Monica Padman]

Yum.

[Dax Shepard]

Best burger.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. You love it.

[Dax Shepard]

You haven't tried it yet?

[Monica Padman]

Not yet. I keep meaning to, and I had

[Dax Shepard]

to say, no cheese. And the cheese is such a good part of it, but, you know, it was still great. That's the thing about quitting things. It hurts. And then the thing is still great.

[Monica Padman]

Good.

[Dax Shepard]

Anywho, this I don't have to mess with because I guess paleo people aren't with cheese.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Is my assumption based on this Paleo burger? It's got avocado sprouts, tomato, lettuce, lettuce, and then just the burger.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Boom. Ordered it, put a bevy of different classy mustards on it, and then was like, oh, I have Emily burger sauce. So I. I doused it funny enough too. Nate is in New York. This is a very Ding, ding, ding. Nate is in New York with his kids for spring break. And I said, you have to eat here. Go get the burger. The kids will love the pizza. And I just sent that to him an hour ago. And now here we are. And I use the sauce last night.

[Emily Hyland]

Wow.

[Dax Shepard]

But such an interesting interview to interview two divorced people that still have to work together.

[Monica Padman]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

Unbelievably fascinating.

[Monica Padman]

Very fascinating. I mean, the interview itself is interesting, but just like the psychology of that is so, so wild.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, that was a first for us.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, it was. That we know of.

[Dax Shepard]

Yes. I guess we could have had a couple on that was secretly separated.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. We've had Melissa and Ben on and it. And you know what?

[Dax Shepard]

They're very much together. No, I know that one I happen to know. But the others, I guess I wouldn't know. And who knows, maybe I wouldn't know.

[Monica Padman]

You're doing a great job keeping it a bit.

[Dax Shepard]

They seem really, really started a horrible. No, they're together, but as everyone is an individual, and then you put those two things together, and every person, every relations you observe is unique unto itself. Certainly every separation is also unique unto itself.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

There's not going to be any two dynamics that are exactly the same.

[Monica Padman]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

So rare. Fun experience.

[Monica Padman]

So fun. Yeah. This podcast I started, I want to

[Dax Shepard]

interview more divorced people who.

[Monica Padman]

I mean. Yeah, let's do it.

[Dax Shepard]

Dedicated show.

[Monica Padman]

This podcast that I've been listening to for, like a day. It seems that one of the people. People on there has a very good relationship with their ex husband, is very much in Their lives.

[Dax Shepard]

That was my mom and dad.

[Monica Padman]

Right?

[Dax Shepard]

They were best friends. They did stuff all the. All the time together. Yeah. Anytime we went to the movies, my mom and I, it was in the town that my dad lived in. We'd always invite him. He'd sometimes come for dinner. He spent the night on Christmas. Pretty, pretty, pretty often. Until she was remarried. But even maybe a couple times then. I don't know. It was more a testament to, like, Barton, my stepdad, who had to deal with my dad being around all the time. My dad did not have a small personality.

[Emily Hyland]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

That's nice.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Okay, some facts. So when did this the emmy squared in LA live open downtown. That was April 3rd, 2020. 25.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, so it's been coming up a minute. So I should be able to order from that one. I hope that'd be much warmer.

[Monica Padman]

When was our Brooklyn live show? It was on September 22, 2018. Early.

[Dax Shepard]

Did you say September?

[Monica Padman]

Huh?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Six months in.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. Okay, what is right below the Michelin star? He had this for. For one of his restaurants. It's called the Biblical Gourmand.

[Dax Shepard]

That sounds fancier than a star.

[Monica Padman]

I know.

[Dax Shepard]

I thought it was above stars.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, because this one has no association with tires.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, no, Michelin still.

[Monica Padman]

I know, but like, you don't hear bib Gourmand and think tires. You hear Michelin and you think tires, which is not so fancy.

[Dax Shepard]

Right, right, right.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. High quality food at a good value. Or as a Michelin selected restaurant, formerly quote the plate. These spots are recognized for using quality ingredients, proper cooking and serving a quote, simply good meal, even if they lack the prestige of a star. Okay. Reminder to anyone that for two weeks, I believe it is, or a month, you'll have to go back in the episode to hear it. The code word, if you go into Emily.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, yeah.

[Monica Padman]

To get a free dessert is dolphin an asparagus.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, but Nate isn't going to be able to benefit from it.

[Monica Padman]

Okay, I don't know what to do about.

[Dax Shepard]

I don't know what to do either.

[Monica Padman]

Okay, well, he can just order and pay for his dessert. Yes. So, guys, dolphin asparagus. Get your dessert. This is exciting.

[Dax Shepard]

We've never had a tie in.

[Monica Padman]

I know. I love it. I love it. Okay, so you expressed a beef with them about Diet Coke in the restaurant. Yeah, it made me look up soda consumption by state.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, fun.

[Monica Padman]

Why don't you guess what you think is the state that has the highest percentage of people who consume soda daily? But this is. Oh, what happened 2010 to 2015. This is on World Pop Review. So it's like, really?

[Dax Shepard]

I'm going to say Mississippi is number one.

[Monica Padman]

No, this is a surprise. I'll tell you. This is a surprise.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

Although it might not be a surprise when you find out, but it's.

[Dax Shepard]

It doesn't correlate with our obesity scales, I don't think.

[Monica Padman]

Well, no, but also there's some tough parts of this place. So may not that soda makes it a tough part, but it's Hawaii.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, interesting.

[Monica Padman]

It's surprising. Right?

[Emily Hyland]

Right.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. H. Maybe not. If I think about it deeply, this is exactly.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, so Hawaii number one. I'm still going to stick with like Louisiana, Mississippi, Alabama.

[Monica Padman]

You're close. You're missing one.

[Dax Shepard]

Kentucky, Arkansas, Arkansas. They're number, what, two? Okay.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. Then we got Wyoming. I'm surprised.

[Dax Shepard]

I am, too. That doesn't make any sense to me.

[Monica Padman]

Wyoming is 73 point of people have

[Dax Shepard]

a soda a day. Very tiny population.

[Monica Padman]

Right, right.

[Matt Hyland]

True.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. Then we have South Dakota.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

Connecticut.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

South Carolina, New Hampshire, New Jersey, Louisiana, New Mexico, Georgia. Ding, ding, ding.

[Dax Shepard]

That should be number one. Is the home of Coca Cola.

[Monica Padman]

It's embarrassing saying.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, not, not, not enjoying your bread and butter or whatever they say.

[Monica Padman]

Well, it's like one of those. Like, you take it for granted. Delaware, Vermont, Florida, Kentucky, Massachusetts, Tennessee, Oklahoma, Pennsylvania, Indiana, Rhode Island, New York, Maine, Maryland, Alabama, Montana, Arizona, Mississippi, Nevada, California, Illinois, North Carolina. California is a. Above North Carolina. That's Texas, Virginia, Colorado.

[Dax Shepard]

Guess last.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Utah. No, damn it.

[Monica Padman]

Alaska.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, wow. They can't get it up there.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. And then right above that is Wisconsin.

[Dax Shepard]

49.

[Monica Padman]

So they're too.

[Dax Shepard]

They're drinking beer. So let me state for the record on, my stereotyping was completely wrong. There's clearly no consistency whatsoever between north and South. And I was wrong.

[Monica Padman]

Also alcohol consumption because. Because a lot of people have drinks with soda.

[Dax Shepard]

Sure. Jack and Coke.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

That's all I really know of is a popular Ramen Coke.

[Monica Padman]

But yeah, Sprite and stuff.

[Dax Shepard]

Right.

[Matt Hyland]

And Shirley Temples.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, sure.

[Monica Padman]

Temples, Temples.

[Matt Hyland]

That's true.

[Monica Padman]

All right, let's see. That's it.

[Dax Shepard]

That's it.

[Monica Padman]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

That's it for Emily and Matt of Emily.

[Dax Shepard]

What a joy.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, it was. It was really. It was also so fun. We've just been talking about Emily Burger for so long and. And it was. It was full circle.

[Dax Shepard]

All right. Love you.

[Monica Padman]

Love you,

[Dax Shepard]

Sam.