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Dax Shepard
Wondry plus subscribers can listen to Armchair Expert early and ad free right now. Join Wondry plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts or you can listen for free wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome, welcome, welcome to Armchair Expert. I'm Dax Shepard and I'm joined by Monica Padman.
Monica Padman
Hi.
Dax Shepard
Today we have Mo Amer on. Yeah, I'm a big fan of Mo.
Monica Padman
Mo is great.
Dax Shepard
Mo is a stand up comedian and an award winning writer. I first saw him on Rami, which is another show I Friend of the Pod where he plays Mo in that but not our Mo in Mo.
Monica Padman
Mo plays Mo in that but then in his show he's a different. He's a different Mo.
Dax Shepard
He's a different Mo, but very similar. Also Black Adam and two standup specials on Netflix. Mo Amer, the vagabond and Mohammed in Texas and he's on tour right now with El Oso Palestino tour, which is the Palestinian bear. Yeah, that's what that translates to.
Monica Padman
This was so interesting.
Dax Shepard
Another incredible story. We're just coming off of John's story and then now we have this.
Monica Padman
We're getting some epic tales in this.
Dax Shepard
Garage are also very kean.
Monica Padman
Yeah, I was thinking a lot about key during this episode.
Dax Shepard
Yeah, we're accumulating some wild. You can really take some circuitous paths to this town of Hollywood.
Monica Padman
That's right.
Dax Shepard
Please enjoy Mo Amer. We are supported by Britbox. There are some incredible shows coming out of the UK right now. The clever writing, the picturesque settings, the witty dialogue, they just do TV differently across the pond in the best way. And you know, they're the masters of charming mysteries set in quaint little villages where three people die a week. Not only do they have a huge selection of classics like Pride and Prejudice, but their new original shows are insanely good too. Especially Ludwig with David Mitchell from Peepshow. He play the introverted puzzle maker guy who accidentally becomes a detective and solves murders like they're crosswords. It's twisty and clever and an absolute treat to watch. So if you want to mix it up and see things differently, try Britbox and stream the best British TV. Go to Britbox.com and start a free trial. Today we are supported by Squarespace and boy, do we have a gorgeous website. I implore everyone to check out. We made it on Squarespace. And when I say we, I mean Rob. He did a beautiful job and it was very easy for him to do. So no matter what kind of website you to build, Squarespace is the perfect partner to get it launched quickly and easily and their design templates are going to make your site look incredible too. If you're trying to do some good this year, you can use Squarespace to set up a fundraising site. Let's say you wanted to raise money for first responders or families impacted by the recent fires here in la. You can fundraise directly on your Squarespace website and grow your impact with built in donation tools. Create a professional on brand site that makes it easy to accept one time or recurring contributions and engage supporters. With built in email campaigns and marketing marketing tools you can connect with your community and inspire more people to support your cause. They're making it easier for you to make a difference. Another reason Squarespace is a company we're proud to be partnered with. Check out squarespace.com for a free trial and when you're ready to launch, use offer code DAX to save 10 off your first purchase of a website or domain. That's squarespace.com and promo code DAX to get started today. He's an opt do you get anxiety before you go out on a talk show that you're gonna have to pee once you get out there?
Mo Amer
Peeing is not the anxiety.
Dax Shepard
It's not.
Monica Padman
That's last on the list.
Dax Shepard
What is it?
Mo Amer
I just watched you and Seth. Actually, I have something in common with Seth. Edibles. Fuck me up. Like I'm terrified of that. I don't really get anxiety. I get anxiety only if something is not settled at home. You know, if something is off, you'll carry that. I'm a very sensitive person. I can feel my family's energy. If something's wrong, I'll know it's wrong, right? I don't know how to describe it. It's like the antenna. Spidey says that's the only time.
Dax Shepard
No compulsive rumination thoughts like I can acknowledge the pee one is insane. I'll be in the dressing room at Kimmel and I'm waiting to hear the knock. I stand in front of the toilet and then when I hear the knock I go one second and then I do my last pee. Cause I'm so nervous that it's 12 minutes.
Monica Padman
Do you think you're at risk of ever peeing in your pants?
Dax Shepard
No. Although if ever there was a place to try it, it would be on Camel.
Mo Amer
Kimmel's the one to do it. Yeah, for sure.
Dax Shepard
It's a safe place to pee or suit.
Mo Amer
So easy to talk to. It feels so calming. I'm doing Kimmel tomorrow. Actually, I Don't know if you knew that or just.
Dax Shepard
I'm doing it Thursday.
Mo Amer
Oh, that's funny. It's awesome.
Dax Shepard
Let's do it on the same.
Mo Amer
Let's do it.
Dax Shepard
I'll go to yours, you come to mine.
Monica Padman
Why don't you guys tell me the same story? We'll plan it.
Dax Shepard
It's going to be great for him.
Mo Amer
Because he's you on the show. As an Arab growing up in America, it'd be so great.
Dax Shepard
That's kind of what they do on Weekend Update. Do you ever watch the stuff with Shay?
Mo Amer
Fuck Shay, man. No, I'm just kidding. That's my brother. That's my brother. It's gonna be downhill from here, guys.
Dax Shepard
But him and Colin.
Mo Amer
No, these are my guys. They're my friends.
Dax Shepard
Yeah. Where they write jokes for each other that they're not allowed to tell and.
Monica Padman
They have to read out loud on Christmas.
Mo Amer
I think whatever the last show is, they do that.
Monica Padman
That's fine.
Mo Amer
It's diabolical. It is.
Monica Padman
You know, it's scary.
Dax Shepard
And much higher risk for Colin, I would say.
Mo Amer
Yeah, definitely. Especially Caus was really trying to get him into trouble. He's genuinely trying to put him in the worst possible pickle.
Dax Shepard
But in a weird way, I'm like, they're geniuses. They've hacked the math of this. And really, we are dying to see this white guy make a terrible joke. Cause we know the risk is career ending. And they figured out how to do it.
Mo Amer
Yeah, they have no. It's true.
Monica Padman
But there's no blame.
Mo Amer
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
Like the whole thing's.
Mo Amer
The black guy wrote it.
Monica Padman
Yeah, exactly. Exactly. I didn't come up with that.
Mo Amer
I didn't mean to say the N word. He told me to say it.
Monica Padman
He made me say it.
Mo Amer
I have to do it. It. It's written. I read everything that's on the Monk.
Monica Padman
To not do it.
Mo Amer
Yeah, I agree. You know what gives me not anxiety, but the thing that causes me to go down, like a thought process. Especially since this is specifically about the show and there's so much to discuss within the series itself.
Dax Shepard
Yeah.
Mo Amer
It's like, what clip do you show? What exactly do you talk about? And I'm a standup as well. It's like, I just want to do jokes. I just want to be a guy on a couch. But I'm in this extraordinary position where I'm the only Palestinian on television with his own show created by a Palestinian, starring and directed by. It's like, what are you going to do? What are you going to say? Everybody's like, come.
Dax Shepard
Yeah, we all want to hear, work this out for us.
Mo Amer
Exactly, yeah.
Dax Shepard
Tell us what to do.
Mo Amer
I really just want to be a comedian. That'd be really great to do that. But I understand that there's an immense responsibility that comes with my position and you can't just be a clown all the time.
Dax Shepard
I have said this a bunch in the past, which is for the young black dude who's from a shit situation and makes it out and becomes successful. It wasn't bad enough that he had to go through all of that and be extra special to get here, but now he's also burdened with the responsibility of representing the black community and speaking out on all issues. And I just have always felt like if you want to be political, great, but just to have to inherit that on top of everything else, it seems like a weird reward.
Mo Amer
No, I agree.
Dax Shepard
And I would be resentful a bit if I were in a position where it's like, no, no, I want to tell jokes and have fun and I'm entitled to do that as much as anyone else is. So does it feel like a burden at all?
Mo Amer
It definitely doesn't feel like a burden. It's funny. That book says the burden and the glory.
Monica Padman
Oh, my God.
Mo Amer
Exactly right.
Dax Shepard
That says it all.
Mo Amer
W such I really do feel standup itself is an art form since that's how I started out technically. I did theater in high school and I was doing standup at the same time. And once I started educating myself on what standup comedy is and the history of standup, historically speaking, the greatest standup comedians have always made you laugh and made you think, yes, of course, there's like the Dangerfield who's just silly and amazing one liners and that's incredible. One of the funniest guys ever, really. But if you look at it, everybody's top five is someone who really made you think.
Dax Shepard
Yeah, who's your top five? Can we agree on number one?
Mo Amer
Yeah, for sure. It's close. I don't like to put them in any particular order because they each have a fascinating skill set that the other one can't do. Like Prior and Carlin. Carlin has a particular skill set. His ahead of the game in the most incredible way where everything he says today is relevant, but he has a certain structure. He has to write every single thing down. And you have Prior, which is really freewheeling, which is my style, really. I write everything on the fly. I have to do it in front of the audience. I can't sit down and just write it out. I'm inspired by the audience. I need that. So I appreciate those skill sets. So I really don't like to put them in a particular order, but these are the comedians I truly admire and love so much.
Dax Shepard
A good analogy would kind of be like you're asking, who's your favorite athlete as opposed to who's your favorite basketball player, favorite hockey player. Prior's doing something different than Jerry Seinfeld, than Cosby was sitting down and doing this.
Monica Padman
Yeah, Chappelle. Do you like Chappelle?
Mo Amer
Of course, yeah. We've done thousands of shows together. Pryor, Carlin. Bill Hicks to me is up there, unfortunately died so young, but he was on that trajectory of being truly ahead of his time and magnificent in his own way. Chappelle is on my top five just because I've seen him personally. Thousands of shows together, it's like seeing inside of how a Rolex works, like how the mechanism all flows. It's just really fascinating to see that. And I feel like we're very similar in ways. A lot of things overlap between us, and I'm just grateful to have one of the greatest of all time and to be able to see him. And he's my brother, he's my mentor, but also like family. So he's up there. Of course. I don't think there's a debate there then. The fifth is really hard. It's like Eddie Murphy, but he stopped. He got so famous. Once you stop doing stand up and want to come back to it, it's almost impossible.
Dax Shepard
Yeah, it's very impressive that Seinfeld was able to come back and do a.
Mo Amer
Real show, but he never really stopped doing stand up. He always would show up in his show was Stand Up. Murphy became a movie stuff, rock and roll, man.
Dax Shepard
A lot of young people wouldn't even know he was a stand up.
Mo Amer
Yeah, exactly. But those are the albums I used to listen to. But when I first started Stand Up, I was only been in the country like five years, so I didn't really know anything about the history of stand up. I would be at open mics and be like, oh, you sound like Kenison. I'm like, who the fuck's Kenison? They're like, who the fuck's Kenison? You live in Houston. People thought I was full of shit because I didn't have an accent. To them, they feel like, oh, if you're an immigrant, you should have some kind of accent. The fact that you don't is baffling. So we don't really believe it.
Dax Shepard
Yeah.
Mo Amer
Like I would tell my friends when they found out, because you don't talk about it. You just walk around like, hey, I don't have citizenship yet.
Dax Shepard
You're trying to fit in, not stand out more.
Mo Amer
Yeah, but it never really comes up. You just want to ball in the neighborhood, have a good time. You're not really thinking about it. It's not like we're going to go travel to Europe together. Yeah, they know the family, but you're too young, you're too naive, you're thinking about too many other things. Tend to share your immigration status. It just didn't really come up at that time.
Dax Shepard
Now, this is linked to the obligation to talk about being Palestinian in this moment. But also, do you get sick of having to tell your story? Because your show, which we're going to talk a lot about, is your story. So you inevitably do have to share it again. Back to the I just want to be funny. I don't want to have to tell this fucking story again.
Mo Amer
There's some fatigue for sure, but it's mostly not coming from sharing the story because I am introducing different eras of it, and there is so many layers that are baked into each experience. Whether it is the Gulf War, growing up in America, there's really fun ways and interesting ways to explore that. As a storyteller, I am really intrigued by that, and I want to dive into it and capture all the subtleties and bring them out. That is the best part of writing the TV show and creating a show that is really emotional at times. I can't explain to you how many moments in the series while I was filming, especially season two, where I would have to go off and just weep and then come back and then start over and then direct. Okay, guys, so what we're going to do is, you know, process. Co star's like, how the fuck are you doing this? I saw what happened. I saw it.
Dax Shepard
You were in the corner crying.
Mo Amer
Shut your mouth.
Dax Shepard
You weren't getting anything from craft service. You were whimpering to yourself in front of it.
Mo Amer
That's. That's fun. I really do enjoy that. Whether it's super emotional or just straight up comedic scene that we're shooting and you're just feeding lines to Hamid, which is one of my favorite characters in the whole season. The thing that I have happening to me right now, especially on tour, is all the people sharing their experiences with me.
Monica Padman
Sure, yeah. You have to hold a lot, and.
Mo Amer
That'S a massive thing. That's the most difficult part. May have people Coming up to me talking about they lost 200 family members. I held a kid yesterday, he's three years old, he's from Gaza, he's getting treatment here. He's lost his mother. And I'm like holding him and I'm like, yeah, you know, just thinking about him. I just had a son, he's 17 months. I can't even imagine it. Yeah, that's the stuff that's really, really, really heavy. And that's where the responsibility comes. But literally there's nobody else speaking about it from an actual Palestinian perspective.
Dax Shepard
Right. I hear a lot of young white, liberal kids telling me about it.
Mo Amer
Yeah, well, it's good. People should engage in this conversation. That's the only way to truly have any kind of progress is engage in these talks. But no one is coming from my background talking about it at. No one has the voice that I do or the platform that I do. So just to engage in that. And it's also a massive test for me as a comedian because I could always go up and just give me a topic, dissect this, have a blast with it, make it funny, no problem. But to toe that line is dangerous.
Dax Shepard
Well, that's what Chappelle's so masterful at. And yeah, I need his perspective on black experience. The insight that he has repeatedly given me is just incredibly valuable and so authentic and from the ins that I always appreciate that.
Mo Amer
Can't agree with you more.
Dax Shepard
To start, you were born in Kuwait.
Mo Amer
I was, yep.
Dax Shepard
I got food poisoning in the Kuwait first class lounge.
Mo Amer
Oh, no.
Dax Shepard
And then had food poisoning for 28 hours of flight back.
Mo Amer
That's not funny.
Dax Shepard
No, it's really funny. Can you think of a worse scenario than food poisoning setting on as they close the door for your 14 hour flight?
Mo Amer
That's horrible. I had a similar situation. Did not last 28 hours. That is misery. Had a similar situation from Sweden to Frankfurt. Catching my connection flight in Frankfurt. Before I boarded the flight I bought, I thought it was just a regular sparkling water. So I take a drink of it. I was like, oh my God, this tastes God awful. It's pear fucking pear sparkling water. I'm like, God damn you, Swedish people. Like, who drinks pear sparkling water? And whatever formula it takes to make the pear taste that flavor, that perfume just created the worst possible bubbling sickness. The storm hurricane was forming. Blood was leaving my head and going right to try to rescue my gut. I either needed to pass gas or take a poop. I wasn't sure about what was going to happen. I feel fainting. Yeah. You can't sit there on the plane.
Dax Shepard
Horrible. Sweaty Brow Ridge.
Mo Amer
Sweaty Brow Ridge. A full blown waterfall situation from every area possible. The back of the dome. The front of the dome.
Dax Shepard
I would say you now look like someone that's smuggling something on an airplane.
Mo Amer
I shoved cocaine up my ass and now it's backfiring. That's what it looks like. I finally hear the ding to get up. I was like, I got to go to the restroom. We got to figure this out. I felt really faint and right before I grabbed the door, I just go down. Perfect, right? Oh no.
Dax Shepard
You collapsed.
Mo Amer
I just fainted. And I wake up to three of the hottest Swedish German.
Dax Shepard
It's like a beer party.
Mo Amer
They're like, are you okay? What's happening? Have you been partying? What's going on?
Dax Shepard
Were you at the beer garden and had so much fun? You want to have some more fun?
Mo Amer
I was like, no, I wasn't. Leave me alone. Are you diabetic? I was like, no, I'm not diabetic. Thank God. I'm not diabetic. Stop making me panic even more. Just leave me air. It was horrible. I just needed to pass gas. That's all I needed. Just pass gas. And it was all gone.
Dax Shepard
Wow. My first thought upon waking up and seeing the Swedish ski team would be are my pants full? Cuz we don't know what happened. We don't know what happened while I was out.
Mo Amer
Oh yeah, true.
Dax Shepard
And these are very beautiful women. I might have a full cargo.
Monica Padman
Yeah, we had a armchair on. Tell a story about that. Where he pooped in the lane.
Dax Shepard
Yeah.
Monica Padman
In the aisle. And all these beautiful flight attendants were there. And there's poop on them now.
Dax Shepard
Oh no.
Mo Amer
Are you serious?
Dax Shepard
Yes. You just have to tell yourself in those situations.
Mo Amer
Horrible.
Monica Padman
I know.
Mo Amer
They jumped off the fucking plane. Just hear the pilot. Yeah. He just jumped out of the back of the fucking plane.
Dax Shepard
He's got three rain slickers tied together. Hopefully that's pedal.
Mo Amer
I'm such a shy person. I don't even like taking off my shirt in front of people. No, I can't do it. I do it. I got the pool and stuff. Right. I can't imagine a scenario where I my pants on a plane as everybody and they're all looking at you.
Dax Shepard
We'll just say, ideally, if that happens, you want to wake up and see three ugly old men.
Mo Amer
Yes.
Dax Shepard
You're like, yeah, guys. I myself, you know what it's like?
Mo Amer
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
I'm disgusting. Like you guys.
Mo Amer
Smoking a cigarette with on his fingertips like you don't care. Yeah, I remember. 62. Nam was worse.
Dax Shepard
I myself an hour ago. Welcome.
Mo Amer
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
Okay, so dad is a telecoms engineer.
Mo Amer
Great segue.
Dax Shepard
Yeah. We're going back to Kuwait. Sharp.
Mo Amer
Let's bring up your deceased brother.
Dax Shepard
After all, you lost your mother in 1990.
Monica Padman
Yeah, we'll knock on wood for that one.
Dax Shepard
Straight into that, yeah.
Mo Amer
My father was a telecommunications engineer.
Dax Shepard
And was Kuwait the first stop when they left Palestine?
Mo Amer
When my mom and dad married. Prior to that, my father got his telecommunications engineer in England. The first job offer was actually in Doha in Qatar in the 60s. So he lived there for like a year. That's the reason why they left. This is a job. Just like if you're in Houston and you get a job in Kansas, or if you're in la, you get a gig, you gotta go film in Toronto. Same thing. So he was in Doha, and then he got a job in Kuwait, and that was where my family settled and we were all born there. He worked for the Kuwaiti oil company. He built one of the first radio stations in Kuwait. He was instrumental in creating wireless communication at that time between oil rigs. He was a really brilliant dude. Truly ahead of his time. My mom would always tell me, like, oh, he had a cell phone in the 60s. That big thing that you put on your shoulder and it's a massive bo.
Dax Shepard
Yeah, Microwave.
Mo Amer
Yeah, he was that guy. He always had to have the top tech whenever it comes out.
Dax Shepard
You guys left when you were nine. But how long had they been there?
Mo Amer
Oh, since the 60s. 25, maybe 30 years there. And they would go back and forth to west bank, where my family lives and grandparents are.
Dax Shepard
And did they come to love it when you guys did leave? Did mom miss it?
Mo Amer
It was more than just loving Kuwait. It was more the normalcy of the life that we had there as a great life. My uncle and my cousins lived three houses down. All my aunts. Everybody settled in Kuwait, and we had a lot of family there, and my grandparents and some of my aunts. Of course, a lot of the extended family was still in the West Bank. But we had this real unification where we would see each other every weekend. There's a barbecue every weekend. All my uncles are talking smack and playing all these different games. And whoever loses has to buy the dessert.
Dax Shepard
Was your dad gregarious and loud?
Mo Amer
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
Are you more mom or Dad?
Mo Amer
I guess I'm a really solid mix of both. I have the exploratory like my dad had. He really wanted to figure out what was going on. He would really Travel a lot and want to see the world. So curious in that way. And my mother was very funny, poetic. She still to this day writes poetry and that's her life. She wakes up in the morning, she's inspired by something she writes. It sometimes is super sad, but thoughtful and sweet. Sometimes it's funny. I feel like I have a great mix of both, but my dad was really outgoing. He was the first guy on the dance floor, get everybody going. And he was that guy for sure.
Dax Shepard
I have a ton of memories of 4, 9. Do you remember living there?
Mo Amer
Everything. But we also come from the Sham region, which is basically Santa Barbara. It's so gorgeous. The weather is stunning. There's not really any desertous regions unless you go super south or you hit the Jordan Valley. That's where it becomes that way. And there's Bedouins there. Of course, there's tons of sheep herders. We do come from a farming culture. Originally.
Monica Padman
Santa Barbara seems to be the place. When my parents first came to visit here, we went to Santa Barbara on a day trip and they were like, this reminds me of India. I was like, what? And then we had a few other people from other places say like, Santa Barbara's kind of like this person.
Dax Shepard
As it turns out.
Mo Amer
Turns out it's not really suited for that kind of living, to be honest. You don't go to explore the desert there, but surely in Kuwait we did that. I mean, I used to ride the bicycle as kids, set up mounds and we just dive off of them. And you just bounce off of that shit and just keep going. Yeah, yeah. Just ruthless. I would hop on the back of dirt bikes and fall off going 40 miles an hour. But you're eight, you're just like rubber band, doesn't even matter.
Dax Shepard
You went to a British speaking school?
Mo Amer
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
What kind of classmates did you have?
Mo Amer
People from all over the world. Bunch of expats lived in the neighborhood we resided in since my father worked for the Kweidi oil company. This is a compound situation. That neighborhood north and south is where we lived in. Ahmadi had so many families. Super, super diverse. You talking about British, Pakistani, Swiss, everybody lived in that neighborhood.
Dax Shepard
And most of the people in that neighborhood working for the oil company.
Mo Amer
Exactly. Everybody had a different job within the company itself. Like Aramco company. You go overse. That's the biggest oil company in the world, number one. But it's like driving onto military base. Oh, right, right. Our neighborhood. At the end of it there was like the hospitality palace. So anybody that visited there would be presidents that would visit, they would put them up there.
Dax Shepard
I would ride by on my bike if I was a kid and try to see who was staying in the.
Mo Amer
Palace all the time. Would you? Yeah, all the time.
Dax Shepard
So curious, like, is Michael Jackson going to come out?
Mo Amer
Oh, no, we're all over it. We see cars come in. We immediately just pedal over there and talk to the security guy in the front.
Dax Shepard
Try to figure out who this wealthy man is.
Mo Amer
He's like, trust me, you don't want know. Michael Jackson, President of Malaysia or something like that. Ah, okay, let us know.
Dax Shepard
Salt in the brunai.
Mo Amer
Yeah, Michael Jackson. We used to mimic him. He was the thing back then for sure.
Dax Shepard
Oh God.
Mo Amer
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
So Gulf War breaks out in 91, August of 90.
Mo Amer
The reason why I remember exactly the Iraqi invasion was then, and I remember it quite well because I was supposed to have my tonsils removed two days after they came in. So I was like, damn it. So now they still have my tonsil.
Dax Shepard
Tonsillitis might have been a happy accident.
Mo Amer
No, it's not, bro. You're miserable. I have enormous tonsils.
Dax Shepard
I bet they're gorgeous.
Mo Amer
They're massive. They are gorgeous. They are mountainous. You can ski over those fucking things for sure.
Monica Padman
You should probably get them out now.
Mo Amer
I am so scared.
Dax Shepard
Adults aren't supposed to do it.
Mo Amer
This like 50, 50 bleed or something crazy like heavy bleeding.
Dax Shepard
Was it someone on here?
Mo Amer
Six weeks to eight weeks recovery. No talking.
Dax Shepard
They cauterize it but you can't feel if it's bleeding down into your stomach.
Mo Amer
That's all I needed to hear to make it even worse.
Monica Padman
Why are the kids more. Why are they able to.
Dax Shepard
I don't know if they're tinier or.
Monica Padman
They'Re easier to counter.
Mo Amer
I think it's not as mature enough. It's a in n out procedure for.
Dax Shepard
K. But someone was just telling an adult was really battling whether or not to do it. They don't like to do it on adults because it's bleeding.
Mo Amer
I went to the top specialist at UCLA and they were like, 50, 50, they're gonna bleed, but you'll be fine. It's just gonna take a lot longer to heal. I was like, you know what? I'll just take antibiotics.
Dax Shepard
Take my big ass tonsils out of here.
Mo Amer
I do a lot of voices too. Like, what if it affects how I do all these accents? What if I just end up talking like this all the time now? Yeah, my life is ruined because I sound terrible.
Dax Shepard
So the invasion's in August. The US enters as I remember, because my birthday is January 2nd and I got my license in 91 on the 2nd and it was the only thing that played in the radio. I feel like it was maybe January 1st of 91. The US entered.
Mo Amer
Yeah, I had left before that. It was really, really intense because that was the first time I knew that we were stateless number one. I just knew this happy life. I didn't know anything was wrong. I was like why don't we just go back to Palestine? And they're like no, we can't necessarily do that either. It's not the best next step. Let's figure it out. Your parents, you see them and they're your pillars. They're always in control. There's nothing ever wrong. Seemingly know everything and to see them so worried. And I remember this to this day. That call at 6am Those days, the phone, you know, I was like who the hell's calling? I remember getting up, picking up the phone was like Saddam is invading Kuwait. Hangs up and now everyone is out to try to get as many resources for the house. Food, rice, water, whatever you can get to just store it. That's when everything changed and they got to our at 1 o' clock in the morning. I've slept through the whole breaking of the door, ransacking the home. They were threatening my mom, my dad. Who's in this bedroom, who's in his bedroom. They were pointing at my bedroom and they were threatening. They were going to throw a grenade in the bedroom.
Monica Padman
Oh my God.
Mo Amer
Like tell us, tell us, tell us. They were trying to figure out who works at the Equator Oil Company since the whole reason of their invasion to begin with is supposed siphoning of Iraqi oil.
Dax Shepard
Was that their premise? They were diagonally drilling in that's what they were saying.
Mo Amer
I don't know. That's a bigger conversation. Now as a grown ass man I see what's everything going on living in America now I know who's been putting all these people in power. Yeah, let's talk about that. But that was the premise is that Kuwait was stealing from them and he's there to take it back. But then since it's the Kuwaiti oil company. So our neighborhood was hot one and it was all about collecting people who.
Dax Shepard
Could help manage and turn over the control of it.
Mo Amer
Exactly.
Dax Shepard
Your dad's like I just do telephones.
Mo Amer
Well that's the biggest fucking thing, communication. Okay, that was probably on their top five list. Transferring all communication communication to at all. So my dad had one choice. Either do it or potentially your family's at risk. Might take them all out. You're not gonna find out if they're bluffing or not.
Monica Padman
Yeah, exactly.
Mo Amer
You're just gonna say, yeah, that's me. What are you gonna do? So he was forced to go in and redirect, from what I've heard, some of it at that time. And he regrets it. Didn't feel good about any of it.
Monica Padman
Well, he had to protect himself and his family.
Mo Amer
He loved Kuwait, and he loved the people of Kuwait. He loved everything there. And he was just saddened to see it all happen that way. But he was also just protecting our family. Soldiers would show up early in the morning at our house and all throughout the whole street. It was pretty regular, but I felt like our house was a spot. And play soccer with these guys. Have me, like, hold the machine guns. Like, I don't hold the machine gun. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was that weird. Different life. Just everything changed.
Dax Shepard
Right. And trying to evaluate, are these guys mean and evil?
Mo Amer
They weren't.
Dax Shepard
Right. But when they first show up with.
Mo Amer
The guns, they have moments, though. I remember this guy, he had a thick stache. Huge. But I was really fast as a kid, and I played tons of soccer, so I was killing these older guys. He just socks me real hard. And I remember being laid out on the ground, and I look up and I see him, and this is how he felt. Like he was laughing. He goes. And I was like.
Dax Shepard
Like a bald villain.
Mo Amer
It felt evil. I know he's not. He was just fucking with me. But I can't forget his face. If a sketch artist was sitting here, I can draw him. You never forget that. But, yeah, that was a wild experience that. I slept through that first initial invasion. They took over the whole neighborhood. My mom and dad are both in a really terrible position. My dad particularly, and a bunch of other employees or ex employees. Some people were able to get out before they came in. It's really difficult situation, especially with us kids. And there's other kids who are studying overseas. What about them? And then the money is gone. Yeah, I'm the sixth of six. Okay, so all the money's gone overnight. Saddam said, oh, the Kuwaiti dinar is equivalent to the Iraqi dinar. Well, Kuwaiti dinar was, like, four times. Absolutely insane.
Dax Shepard
So how did dad get you guys all out?
Mo Amer
In the show, I had to tweak it. But in real life, what happened is my mom got myself and my sister out. My brother stayed with my dad. We got on the bus. My mom strategically hid the money in the suitc in a really insanely savvy way. I never saw the side of my mother. You see your mom's a superhero at this point. Like, how are you coming up with this? Like, grabbing the razor, cutting down the zipper, putting equal amounts of money. It's incredible sewing it together. I just remember it to this day. And going through ad off, basically war zone, through another war zone to Amman, Jordan, to my mom, sending my sister and I to Houston by ourselves.
Dax Shepard
How old was your sister? She was 18, so 9 and 18. You're so scared, I'm assuming miserable.
Mo Amer
I don't want to le. Give a shit about the guns. Like, it didn't bother me at all. I was very fearless. I did not care. I would go out still on my own, scope it out, what's happening in the neighborhood. I was just kind of crazy that way. But I love my friends and I wanted to see them. And I didn't necessarily allow that invasion to like, change that for me. And I knew they weren't going to hurt me. Like, they're not going to hurt kids. They were very gentle with children, actually. But I didn't want to leave my mother and thought I could be really helpful.
Dax Shepard
Right.
Mo Amer
It wasn't like, I don't want to leave you, my friends. No. It was more like, hey, I'm a helping hand. This sucks. I have to go. How are you going to do this on your own? And that was the thing that really ripped me apart more than anything.
Dax Shepard
Who did she send you to?
Mo Amer
My brother. He was studying in Houston.
Dax Shepard
Is this the brother that became a doctor?
Mo Amer
Yes, he's a PhD in biochemistry. Super brilliant, amazing human. And then she by herself goes back to Kuwait. And that's where all the real hell started. Because there was all this posturing between America and Iraq and say, Saddam is saying, go back. No, we're not going to go back. This is ours. Oh, yeah. Then the oil fields went on fire and. And now it's a completely different world. Literally noon looks like midnight. Then, of course, the Iraqis started to retreat. It was a big heist. They were clearing out Mercedes dealerships. The Iraqis were. Overnight, he released a bunch of prisoners just to create chaos. That was his strategy of war, I guess. Then there was a massive situation that happened with my mom and my dad. My dad in particular. The Kuwaitis started regaining power, as they should. It's their country. They started forming these different militias. They came into our house. This is my story for my mom. They knock on the door, they ask, there's a car for sale. Because we're liquidating everything. And she goes, I don't know if it's for sale. Let me ask my husband. She asks him. And as he comes out, they put a hood over him, kidnap him. He's gone. What? She doesn't know where he is. Nothing. Then the American soldiers come in. So you had the Iraqis come in, burst down the door. You had the Kuwaitis come bursting the door, and then you had the US Soldiers come bursting the back door. My brother is neurodivergent, has his own issues. It's chaos. She's trying to get medicine for him. She doesn't know where my dad is, who's diabetic and has his own set of issues. It's a whole fucking movie. So my dad was able to call my mom. They were, like, holding all these people, trying to see who's the actual traitor, who's not the traitor, who stuck for us, who didn't. They're trying to regain their power. I honestly don't hold anything against equate. I totally get why they're doing it. Unfortunately, my dad was an impossible situation. Somebody has to vouch for you. You can't just leave. They got to know it wasn't an inside job for sure. And I genuinely don't hold anything against them. I really love them. The Kuwaitis are some of the gentle, sweetest people, but in this situation is awful. She doesn't know where my dad is. So they had like all these makeshift prisons and office buildings and stuff that were holding people and torture them certain degree, to get stuff out of them. And what did they have issues with at the jail? Communication. They couldn't get fucking calls out. They couldn't get a dial tone. So my dad goes, I can fix it. Yeah, yeah, he fixed it for him. While he's fixing it, they're not in the room. He calls my mom. Listen, you got to find the prime minister. He's a friend of mine. He loves me. He's the head guy in Kuwait. You got to talk to him. He's the only one that can free me. Just get to him and let's get the hell out of here. And my mom's like, what about the money? We have to get your money. You're owed this. This is your money you worked 25 years for. Got to get it back. And my dad's like, fuck the money. Just get me out of this hellhole. And my mom goes, the gangster that she is, I'm gonna find this guy and I'm gonna get your money. She's Driving soot is in the air. It's just disgusting. All these oil rigs on fire has caused chaos throughout the roads, in the environment, and breathing everything. So now she's just on a journey trying to find him. This is three weeks. Oh, wow. She says, it was one time. The militia had this checkpoint. They told her, how do we know this car is not stolen? Because people are just stealing so much. He goes, I need to see the title for this car. She goes, I don't know where the title is for the car. Well, you need to find it. You can't get through here. She goes back to the house. She swore to God, she said, I don't know how it happened, but I couldn't see anything. It was pitch black. I just reach into a pile of papers, and it's the title to the car. Most incredible thing. She goes in. After weeks of weeks trying to trace this guy down, she finds some jail. She hears that he's there, this prime minister. She's talking to the outside security. She's crying to him, saying, my husband's been wrongly in prison. He goes, if you don't stop crying, I'm gonna put you in jail with him. Like, kind of threatening her. She goes, listen, I need to talk to the prime minister. He knows my husband. He gets scared. He's like, what? Oh, yeah, he's here. So my mom walks into this building. She can hear guys not having the best time. Let's just say that, yeah, she's walking down this flickery hallway. She goes and makes a right into the guy's office. She looks around the office. It's pristine. It's gorgeous. It's the direct opposite of the building. She just walk through. But then she looks at all the technology in the room. She recognizes it immediately. She goes, this is all my husband's stuff. And he says, who are you? She tells him who she is, tells him who her husband is. He freaks out. He's like, where's most of I love him. Where is he at? He's not a trade. He's a great man. How many letters you need? I'll sign them all. Sign a letter for her. She went back to pick him up at the airport. They meet at the airport with my brother. My dad comes in, he's 50 days now, full beard. And they go, where's your two other. The kids? And she goes, oh, they already left. And they go, how do we know they're not here and they're hiding? We imprisoned his father. He's innocent. What if they want revenge? Or something. He's like, we don't want revenge. We forgive you. Forget it. He's over there. He's like, no. Now you got to show proof.
Monica Padman
Oh, Jesus.
Mo Amer
She has to go by another two days of that. Then she collects my dad, they go to Amman. My mom, my brother come like nine months later.
Dax Shepard
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Lost my narrative, or rather it was stolen from me. And the Monica Lewinsky that my friends and family knew was usurped by false narratives, callous jokes and politics. I would define reclaiming as to take back back what was yours. Something you possess is lost or stolen, and ultimately you triumph in finding it again. So I think listeners can expect me to be chatting with folks both recognizable and unrecognizable, names about the way that people have navigated roads to triumph My hope is that people will finish an episode of Reclaiming and feel like they filled their tank up, they connected with the people that I'm talking about talking to, and leave with maybe some nuggets that help them feel a little more hopeful. Follow Reclaiming with Monica Lewinsky on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to Reclaiming early and ad free right now by joining Wondery plus in the Wondery app or on Apple podcasts.
Dax Shepard
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Mo Amer
Yeah, I've never told the story. It's crazy that I said 92. Your dad called about 92. I got Houston two days before Halloween in 1990 and then Halloween happened and I've never Halloween before. Why is everybody dressed like demons? Where did my mom send me?
Dax Shepard
This is evil. You've heard we were a godless country.
Mo Amer
And boy, it was so funny.
Dax Shepard
It was so sad.
Monica Padman
Everyone in devil costumes.
Mo Amer
I've never even seen cleavage. And like all the girls are naked. I'm like, you know, just crazy.
Monica Padman
Asking for chocolate and candies.
Mo Amer
Yeah, exactly. You know, it's just, wow, check our drink. And I had a British accent. I stuck out like a sore thumb. Nobody really researched the neighborhood we moved into. It wasn't like the greatest neighborhood right out the gate. My brother, he doesn't know. He's a young kid too. He's a super nerd. It was next to a stop and go and that's the only thing we had. I would go there and that's when I knew America. I'm gonna go back to war.
Dax Shepard
What'd your mom and dad do in the States?
Mo Amer
Once he came to the States, he's an entrepreneur, so he owned electronic stores actually in Kuwait as well, like a side gig. He was like the first Best Buy there. It's like Radio Shack. Bas before Radio Shack.
Dax Shepard
So he opened up a place in Houston.
Mo Amer
He opened up a 99 cent store. But then he started with his knowledge, realizing that it's a poor neighborhood. He was like, oh, I can bring telephones that they don't have access to for a really great price. So he brings them in and he starts showing him 99 cents plus. That's how they get you. Is that plus?
Dax Shepard
Sure.
Mo Amer
So it's a wide range of goods.
Monica Padman
How do we American culture pretty quickly.
Mo Amer
Pretty quickly.
Dax Shepard
Necklace.
Mo Amer
He wore a suit. Every day he would call people from.
Dax Shepard
The living room and tell them they want a free cruise.
Mo Amer
He figured it all out. Free telephone.
Monica Padman
It's 200.
Mo Amer
Congratulations. It's so funny. But he would sell these phones, had a whole display of a wide variety of phones that did different things, whether if it's a football phone, whether it's one that you could push a hold button and it plays music of your choosing and you're like, what? That was like the tech of that time. So he had a. All of it and we would sell like hotcakes. So I think that eventually he would have probably gotten back in the telecom and the way that cell phones are today. I mean, I always think about it. I had a discussion yesterday, I was like, I wonder. Probably been very rich actually. Think about it.
Dax Shepard
Certainly.
Mo Amer
Yeah. So he dies in 94, December 1995.
Dax Shepard
So you're young, you're 14.
Mo Amer
I'm 14, yep.
Dax Shepard
Why did he die so prematurely?
Mo Amer
I think it's the losing everything in your late 50s. I say it's like going from rags to essentially riches and going to rags again. After spending your whole life trying to create a future for yourself and your family and your kids and having the ability to provide for them on a level that is going to be really difficult to do at this age. And he never really diversified his funds. It was so safe in Kuwait. Never really thought something was going to go down like this. And unfortunately that's what happened. I think, think all my dad's friends and my uncles, they all died fairly young. The massive, massive stress of the war, carrying that burden, carrying that weight around really took its toll and eventually chipped away at him, unfortunately.
Dax Shepard
How scary does Life get at 14 with him now out of the picture?
Mo Amer
Oh, it's terrible. Emotionally, you're gone. I was already checked out because my mom didn't come for like nine months. So I was really angry about being there without my mom. My sister is an absolute sin. God Bless her. She only knew how cook one dish. One of the things that my mom gave my sister was a recipe book that had all these different pieces of paper from different eras from my grandmother, my great grandmother, from my great, great, great grandma. It went back almost 100 plus years. It's pretty intense. But these are all the recipes. These are gold. But she would only make one dish. And I just come home seven days in a row. I was like, rice and lentil again. Where's my mom? I want to go home. And meanwhile, cut to my mom, she's like driving through oil fields and trying to find you little ungr. It was really difficult. And I was always very independent and adventurous and I wanted to be out. Nobody could really control me and I didn't know what to do with my emotions. So I was a 14 year old kid in high school. I was just skipping. I already knew I was going to be a comedian.
Dax Shepard
Did you make friends easily?
Mo Amer
Oh, yeah.
Dax Shepard
So you landed on your feet. You were social.
Mo Amer
It was rough at first. The British English thing did not help. It was a Mexican situation pretty regularly. But then the British accent was like, you're not Mexican, but what the hell are you? Yeah, usually in my class, I was the first Mohammed there. I spoke British English and at times I did not know that British English, certain words were significantly different meaning than American English. Like, I walked up to my fourth grade teacher. I was like, Mrs. Strand, can I have a rubber, please? I made a mess on my paper, you know? And she's like, what? You came on your paper? You came on your paper.
Dax Shepard
You were wearing a purple accent.
Mo Amer
You fucking in fourth grade? What is fucking? You know, like, I had no idea we had a cat. You don't say cat in British English. You say pussy. And I walked up to Bruce at recess. The most embarrassing. Oh, no possible spot. I was like, bruce, que sua. He was like, what, man? He was like, I have a pussy now. Isn't it fantastic? And he was like, what? I learned this quickly about black people. They can't hold it in. They have to tell everybody. They like, come on. Everybody got around. Everybody.
Dax Shepard
Fresh off the presses.
Mo Amer
Exactly. He got everybody around in front of the entire class at recess. He was like, watch this. He's like, mo, do you have a? And I was like, yeah, I have a. Is it lovely? It's small and fluffy. Just kept going with it. Jose lost his mind. He was like, what, bro? You. You have a Pinocchio for real, bro? He was like, so conf. Confused.
Dax Shepard
This playground sounds like a Sitcom.
Mo Amer
And he paused and he goes, can I see it, bro? Like. Like, I don't believe you. Yeah, I got punched a lot in the beginning, but I learned quickly.
Dax Shepard
You had the right skill set. It sounds like, minimally, you weren't lonely. That's a blessing.
Mo Amer
When I threw a football, everything changed. It was like, oh, this guy can throw the. Out of a football.
Dax Shepard
Oh, no kidding.
Mo Amer
You could very, Like, I would play ball, play basketball. I was very unassumed. Nobody knew that I could play that well. I wasn't always, like, overweight. I almost died in sixth grade. I hit my head on the bottom, and that's when I gained all the weight because I was in a neck brace like this the whole time. Terrifying. I don't know why. I knew exactly what I had to do. I was spitting blood again. It was almost Halloween, so everybody thought I had, like, blood capsules. And I was joking around at the pool, and I was like, no, guys, I think I'm about to die. I walked right past my mom, grabbed a towel, wrapped it around my neck. I was like, mom, you need to take me to the hospital.
Monica Padman
Oh, God, you're so lucky you weren't paralyzed.
Mo Amer
So lucky you wasn't paralyzed or dead. I just think about it. Not even for that. I think about, like, my mom.
Dax Shepard
She didn't have enough on her plane. Yeah, okay. So what's happening financially, though, when dad is out of the picture?
Mo Amer
Just have to fend for yourself. You have to figure it out. So my mom worked at a Mexican restaurant, which turned into Taco Cabana, which is very famous in Houston. Everybody goes to Taco Bell.
Dax Shepard
Oh, okay.
Mo Amer
It's like the fast food chain of Tex Mex. Dinner was lots of Mexican food, but also, you can negotiate for rides. Hey, man, I'll throw in a quesadilla. If you can just bring me here or take me there. I had two quesadillas. All right, now you're asking for a lot. We do two quesadillas and tacos, but I want four rides. We just negotiate. Honestly, it was really dark. But also some of my greatest years and my friends that I've made when I was 11 years old in that particular neighborhood. We're like the sandlot. We made a pact. We're gonna raise our kids together. We're gonna go to college together. I always said, I'm gonna be a comedian. You guys are gonna go to college. I'll visit you guys. And everything really panned out exactly how we all set out to be. And really, truly, that Group of friends. That camaraderie, that brotherhood that we created in that beautiful neighborhood got me through everything that. That support system all the while.
Dax Shepard
You guys applied for asylum?
Mo Amer
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
You don't have passports. Right. You don't have a Kuwaiti passport.
Mo Amer
In the Middle east, it's all about your lineage. So when you go there, actually, when you enter, they say, what is your origin? And you say, palestinian. You either get Palestinian ID cards, it's worthless. It's actually worse. My uncle always taught me, don't get the ID card. If you do, then you're not ever be able to fly into Tel Aviv. When you get your US passport, you're always going to be subjugated to the cages. You literally have to go through. Through this apartheid system where you go through cages. He says, just don't do it.
Dax Shepard
Okay. And even though you were born in Kuwait, you don't have any.
Mo Amer
That's not how it works. It's all based off of your origin, where your parents come from.
Dax Shepard
Right.
Mo Amer
So my parents are both Palestinian. So you're Palestinian. You don't get Kuwaiti because in Kuwait, it's all tribal. So if you're an original Kuwaiti from that area, the government takes care, like you should.
Dax Shepard
You get a stipend.
Mo Amer
Yeah. So the resources that your country is producing, you actually benefit from those resources. They can't do it for everyone. So it's like you have to be from that land. And your right is your right. My right is in the west bank in Palestine, or in Haifa. That was now gone as Israel. So now we go to the west bank, and whatever is there, that's for you, but that's not for you here. So that's not how it works. It's where you're actually from, where your parents are from, particularly.
Dax Shepard
So I guess we get into some of the complexities of this. This immigration story you have, because you're just waiting forever on the asylum list. However, that process works. But in the meantime, you have no passport. You can't come and go. You're just in this kind of purgatory.
Mo Amer
Yes, exactly.
Dax Shepard
For how long?
Mo Amer
Took me 20 years before I got citizenship. But when I turned 18 is when I was able to get a Social Security card. I was in the system before, but I couldn't get the social.
Dax Shepard
And you can't work until you have a social.
Mo Amer
You can't work. I'm still worked. My mom would volunteer me down there. Business owners, when I had jobs that I didn't want to do, but I did where I would Sell like, fake Rolexes or fake watches through my dad because he would go to the wholesale district once he passed away. Alhamdul, God rest his soul. His friend gave me a job, and then I started learning about wholesale business, import, export. And I started seeing this guy wearing this nice watch. I'm like, bro, that's crazy. He goes, that's fake. I was like, oh, it looks amazing, though. And so I was like, oh, I think I could hustle these in school and on the street here. All I have to do is wear it, and then they're going to ask me where you got it. I'm going tell them it's for sale. So that was my shtick. I would just put on a Versace sunglasses and be working at the cashier or whatever. And people be like, oh, man, those are dope. I'm like, oh, it's the last pair, bro. Yeah, I'll sell them to you if you want. It's 1:25. They would leave and I'd take out another pair and put it on shirt.
Dax Shepard
Shirts, your second to last pair.
Mo Amer
And it would be so bad because the end of the week, they're all wearing the same same. And it would come in really mad and aggressive, like, bro, you told me it was the last one. I was like, look, for real, though, this is one of one. This Movado watch is the only one I have. There's no other design of this. I promise you, nobody else is going to have this. And he'd be like, oh, man, that's cool. I was like, yeah, I would sell that one.
Monica Padman
Oh, my God.
Mo Amer
I was really good at it. To the point my dad's friend put his own standup. And I was like, why are you doing this? You're not going to compete with me. This is crazy. He goes, bro, you're selling at my location. And that's where I learned about business, right? It was like, oh, I'm using your place of business. I owe you commission.
Dax Shepard
You gotta kick up.
Mo Amer
I didn't know this. He goes, it's a valuable lesson. Don't worry, you still sell. Just give me the commission. I was like, okay, yeah.
Dax Shepard
When we meet Mo on season one, he's selling shit out of his truck. He's got like a full.
Mo Amer
It's a very condensed version. I really wanted to do more with it, but I think there's not enough space. And it's so hard to figure out. In the first season, it was a whole thing with COVID and civil unrest and George Floyd. It was like a Nightmare. Making season one, it was really, really tough. But season two, I had the whole vision for it. I knew exactly what I wanted to do.
Dax Shepard
I had the time to do the Reader's Digest version. You go to the rodeo and Bill Cosby's performing. You're young and you see that. You decide you want to do that. You're a shit student. A teacher says to you, I'll let you stand up so long as you're making fun of the course material. Yeah, that's a lucky, weird thing that happens.
Mo Amer
Mrs. Reed and Ms. Broderick, my English teachers, specifically Mrs. Reed, she really was noticing that. That I was losing it. Cause I was a pretty good student before that. And I basically threw away my ninth grade year, essentially at that point. And she was trying to salvage whatever she could out of me. She said, if you go up in front of the class, like, first she said, how would your father feel if you don't graduate? Which I was like, oh, that's a cold shock. Hit me in the hardest way. And then she was like, don't you want to be a comedian? I was like, yes. Look, I'll let you do standup in class. If you could throw in some Shakespeare that we're working on now. You'll get extra credit, but you don't always have to do it. And I was like, great. Can I do it now? I literally want to front of the class, read out of the book. I don't know this by heart. It's monologue from Macbeth, you know, like, I don't fucking know this. And so I did just a funny version, the British voice that I used to have, and kids were dying. I was like, I'm hooked. So I was like, it's free. Can I come in tomorrow and I'll write a set tonight? And she was like, okay. Did it kill it? And I was like, oh, my God. And then I would just do it every Friday. And she took me into theater arts department. It was Ms. Kreisner, who I'm still close to to this day, my theater teacher from high school, she goes, listen, this kid's been coming to class. He's doing all this original material I've never heard before. He's doing all these accents. It's hilarious. She goes, I think he belongs here. Yeah. Ye. And I was like, maybe the next year. Did theater. Graduated with honors in theater. Honorary thespian. Had a partial scholarship for the School of Film and Television in New York. I passed on that. Didn't even tell a single soul. I don't want them to talk me into it. I didn't want to leave my mother or my brother. I wanted to be close and just build up my stand up chops and let that define my career.
Dax Shepard
And then you enter at 18, this funniest text.
Mo Amer
And Houston's funniest person competition. They have this around the country in each city. But that was a big one, if you can get into that. That was my first time on stage at a comedy club. And I get there and I was so excited. My buddy Nick who drove me to club, he was my guy. He still is.
Dax Shepard
For two quesadillas.
Mo Amer
Yeah, for two quesadillas. That's right. He looks at me, he was trying to be corny. He's like, you ready Mo? This is the first day of the rest of your life. But he was being serious also. And then I went up, caught the bug, made this wild car position. I realized when I signed up, I was like, oh shit. My materials for high school students. These are grown ass adults. Need to fix this. So I rewrote something till 3 o' clock in the morning. I go up, I do it and I get into the system that way and I find out what, what I need to do. I joined it the following year. I made the finals, didn't win the thing. But then I went off and just started doing standup. By the time I was 19, 20 years old, I was already headlining shows and traveling overseas without a passport.
Monica Padman
Yeah, how is that?
Mo Amer
You got a refugee travel document. And it was a really painful process, very expensive, but that was the only way to go overseas.
Dax Shepard
Because you were doing a lot of standup at bases, right?
Mo Amer
I did some bases. The first tour that I did was April of 2001. It was Italy, Germany and Sicily. Was a baby, obviously five months before 9, 11. It was just a totally different experience. And then I went Japan, Korea and Guam, all those military bases. In February of 2002. It was polar opposite from when the first time. Now everything is heightened. But I wanted to do those shows and be myself because I was deathly afraid of being myself. I said, if I can go in front of the troops and be myself, talk shit, make them laugh. I could be myself in front of anybody. That's why they love me. I went on many, many tours and my experience was actually that the soldiers themselves had interacted with someone like me many times and they were excited to see me versus when I was touring in the south. Early on in my career, it was their first interaction with someone like me. It was that Polar opposite. They're actually well traveled human beings and more knowledgeable than you think. And it's not as unsafe as I thought it was. I went back to Iraq. I did shows there still with a refugee travel document, in war zones, the very place that. That we left. And I'm doing shows on bases all throughout Iraq in the most desolate of locations where they could fucking kill me and throw me somewhere no one's going to care. I had some of the best sets and one of one experiences in a state, in Saddam Hussein's palace just converted into a hotel. And I just went there just to see it for myself and collect information and put this thing to rest that's in my heart. That was just lingering. And I wanted to see my aunt that I haven't seen in 19 years. She was the only one that was still living in Kuwait at the time. So it was many different things. I had to sneak into the country. Bas I'm here for the US Government. Kind of just moving him in that direction. He was like, okay. And he just let me in. And then when I was leaving, I stayed three extra days to see my aunt. And I wasn't supposed to, right? So the military wanted to walk me back to the airplane with the other comedian, Olivia Arrington. And I was like, we're fine. We're adults, bro. We're going to go. And he's like, no, no military protocol. I got to escort you all the way to the plane. I was like, dang it, how the hell am I going to do this? And Olivia's like, maybe you go hide in the fucking bathroom. I was like, okay. And then he gets a call and he runs to the suv. See him talking. This is what's going on. He comes back, he's like, sorry, guys, Bradley Cooper just landed from Afghanistan. I gotta go get him. We're like, all right.
Dax Shepard
Thank you, Bradley, you wanna hear something crazy? I was with him.
Mo Amer
Yes. Dude, that's fucking nuts. It was me, Bradley. My body just got chilled.
Dax Shepard
Yeah, that was wild, dude.
Mo Amer
I remember the fucking flyer. It's all hitting me right now.
Dax Shepard
Yeah. And we were in Kuwait and we went on a boat ride in Iraq. There was like Zodiac boats and they were fucking doing cool maneuvers and shit, bro.
Mo Amer
I want to, like, laugh and cry at the same time.
Dax Shepard
Somehow I'm involved.
Monica Padman
Stimulation.
Dax Shepard
I didn't see that coming, bro.
Mo Amer
I didn't see it coming either. Yeah.
Dax Shepard
That's when I got the food poisoning. Coming home from that. We had been in Afghanistan for eight days, and I have been Eating at the Defect, like microwave hamburgers. We get to the Kuwait first class lounge, and I'm looking at all this fresh tabouli and delicious vegetables, and I'm pounding it. And Cooper goes, bro, you're going very hard on the salad bar in Kuwait. And I'm like, it's good. It's a first class.
Mo Amer
That's what I'll get you, by the way. It's a damn salad.
Monica Padman
Yeah, it's always salad. Wisteria. You got to be careful.
Mo Amer
100%.
Dax Shepard
Yeah.
Mo Amer
Yeah. Freaking out.
Dax Shepard
That's hilarious.
Mo Amer
I'm freaking out because I did tell Bradley Cooper. That's so wild.
Dax Shepard
Yeah.
Mo Amer
There. I remember the poster.
Monica Padman
Was there anyone else or just YouTube?
Mo Amer
There's another person.
Dax Shepard
It was Bradley and his cousin. Me and Aaron.
Monica Padman
Oh, wow.
Dax Shepard
That's really wild.
Monica Padman
You literally crossed paths.
Dax Shepard
They were literally all there at the same time then. Because I was about to say, yeah. They didn't let us do shit. Anytime we tried to wander or stray or. The first time I went, we landed in Qatar. The GI's took us to a nightclub and it was like, I'm going to go on the dance floor. I had to get that cleared. There's too much they don't want the drama of.
Mo Amer
Yeah, of course. It's not about getting kidnapped. Is you merely making an ass yourself? Making them look bad because there's literal money at stake that they get every year. Last thing they want is that getting up guy bozoed out. You know, like, thanks a lot. But we're getting half a billion dollars over here and you want to have a good time. I fucked up this contract.
Dax Shepard
Monica's so sick of this story. But I still think it's very funny that I did this. I had heard on my first tour that Larry the Cable Guy was coming the next week. And you know, they make you sign all this shit when you're there. You're signing the Apaches, the Blackhawks. You're just signing everything.
Mo Amer
Yeah, yeah.
Dax Shepard
And everything I signed, which had been signed by all the previous people, I wrote on every single one. Get her done. Dax Shepard. Cause I'm like, he's not gonna have the catchphrase. I'm gonna steal it.
Mo Amer
I love it.
Dax Shepard
What does he write?
Mo Amer
I really like that line.
Dax Shepard
It's kind.
Monica Padman
What we were saying at Kimmel.
Mo Amer
I love that. Actually, they didn't make us sign shit. Walk in, like, come on, get on stage, bitch. Tell us a joke. Okay, guys. Hey. It's really rough out here, eh?
Dax Shepard
If you were tracking your standup career when Are the big level ups? Because, of course, I become aware of you watching Ramy, which I love, and I'm like, who's this most hysterical person who needs his own show? And then immediately had his own show?
Mo Amer
Thank you.
Dax Shepard
That's my experience with you. So what was happening in that standup?
Mo Amer
It's different levels that you start to pass. In 2011, Dave was making his comeback, starting to, like, really tour. And then we happened to be in the Bay at the same time. He was in Oakland, I was in the Bay doing standup, and it was me and my buddy Azarusman, Longtime collaborator. Worked for years. He was like, dave's in town. Let's just go over and hang out. So I would go over, hang out with him, and he was like, hey, you want to open? I was like, yeah. I go up. And then he was like, you want to come tomorrow? I was like, yeah, cool. He's like, you know, I'm going to Atlanta. You want to come to Atlanta? I was like, yeah, cool. Next thing you know, it's eight years of just constant touring with him. But 20, 2014 was the big turning point for me with Dave. He just gave me the inspiration. After a show at the House of Blues in Dallas, he walks up to me after my set. He's like, mo, man. He said, it's killer, bro. What if you do a short film in front of your special? I produce it. I think if you do it right, you could win an Emmy. And, like, hits me in, like, the shoulder. I was like, oh, shit. Short film. I couldn't sleep to save my life. It was like a week or two or two of me just obsessing on what this short film would be. Must have listened to a hundred tracks. I'm really visual person. I need music to help me illustrate the entire picture. And it just clicked when I listened to Elvis Presley's that's All Right, Mama. That song, that's all right, mama. That's all right now. That's all right, mama. You just do as you do. Oh, that's all right. You know, when he did that, I saw my mom putting everything together, getting us out of Kuwait. I just saw the entire thing, which is the same scene that's in episode seven now of the first scene season. I wanted it to be the opening, but anyway, I put it together. I was like, this is it. I was trying to pitch Dave on it, and Dave was like, oh, God, what if this sucks? You know, I inspired this guy to do it.
Dax Shepard
It's a personal story.
Mo Amer
I gotta tell Him. It sucks. It's always a scary thing. I get that. But I knew it didn't suck. I knew it was badass. Was on the bus on tour in Austin. I grabbed his speaker, I was like, you're listening to this. And I put it in, put it down, and I mapped the whole thing out for him. He was smoking some cigarette. He goes, shit, Mo, that's genius. Don't do it in the special. You need to do a TV show. I was like, fuck a TV show. So now it became this whole other obsession. So I started writing down all these really transformative moments of my life. Young kid or teenager or an adult, my experience in war, all these significant scenes, or even a moment with my grandmother how she was teaching me how to eat hummus. Things that I've never forgotten that I put in season two. I just put them on index cards to. By scene, I would work it out. So I'd had a hundred scenes accumulated that I just could mine through. I told ramy about it. 2014, early 15, actually. I was like, yeah, I think I have this idea, but I want to do my stand up special first. He goes, no, let's do your TV show. This is great. I was like, yeah, but I think I should do my special first. I did for Netflix at that point. That explains a lot of the story. And then I can go into the series. And then he was like, well, fuck, if you're not going to do that, I'm going to make my own show. So he goes off and makes his own show and he was like, come do my show. And I was like, I don't know.
Dax Shepard
Because you want to do your own show.
Mo Amer
It's not about the own thing. I'm just very, very protective of ideas. And once you put ideas out, they're kind of over with. Yeah, I just didn't know if it was right or not. I really wasn't sure.
Dax Shepard
Because you're playing Mo, who owns a restaurant on Rami, and you're like, well, now am I stuck with that character?
Mo Amer
Right, right. People would tell me that that was like an argument initially. And I was like, I really don't care.
Monica Padman
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Dax Shepard
Nor should you. But I could see that being something you were hung up on.
Mo Amer
That was something I was totally hung up on. I was thinking about it. It was just like, I was just curious. And then later on, he always jokes. He's like, remember I begged you to do this. I was like, no, you didn't fucking be. It was just going through the bullshit. You Know, just trying to figure it out and making sure that it's the right thing for you and for me, like, it's all love. Last thing I want to do is do something bad for you either. It was an awesome thing.
Dax Shepard
But being on Rami is the first on screen acting I think I did.
Mo Amer
Crashing first like a guest star.
Dax Shepard
That was Pete.
Mo Amer
Pete, yeah. Pete's show.
Dax Shepard
This is an impossible question to answer for you, but you're immediately so insanely natural. Were you shocked by your own ability?
Mo Amer
We try to be humble right now. Show some hum.
Dax Shepard
I'm saying you can't really answer this question, but I have to imagine there's a big relief at how fucking relaxed and in your body you are.
Mo Amer
Yeah, for sure.
Dax Shepard
That's an unknown.
Monica Padman
It's not easy.
Mo Amer
Most people are.
Dax Shepard
Most people are bad at it.
Monica Padman
You get really rigid in front of the camera. Most people do.
Mo Amer
I feel like I was completely born to do it. It feels so good and comfortable. Loved it. I felt like I finally was doing the thing that I was always meant to do.
Dax Shepard
Maybe more than stand up.
Mo Amer
It's close. I love stand up so much. I love stand up because of the vulnerability and a allowing yourself just to speak your mind and ability just to do three shows at Chicago Theater, man, It's its own thing. But we just did 10,000 people. Like, I'm just backstage, literally thanking God before I'm introduced. Just remembering sleeping on fucking floors. Every spot you can imagine, every airport, every courtyard, anything, just to try to make it so. I'm very grateful for that. But this whole experience, like, oh, this is what I'm built for. I'm built to tell stories. I'm built to do television, built to do movies. Doing Black Adam was huge, too. I felt so natural in all that. And then just start reflecting, collecting about my life, you know, I didn't create myself. It's okay to talk about it. Like, I didn't make me.
Dax Shepard
You're the product of a lot of context.
Mo Amer
But also there's certain things, bro, that'll blow your mind. The guttural feeling I had when I saw Stand up for the first time and the journey that it was supposed to take me on, that wasn't the first time. I thought it was, but it's not. When I was seven in Egypt, my dad took us to a play. And the lead of that play, his name is Adel Imam. He's an iconic Middle Eastern actor, Egyptian. He's like the goat of goats of all comedic cinema and live performance. I love this man. I Watched him. I'm seven. I don't really even know totally what they're saying, but it's a captivating experience on that trip. There is a photo that literally tells the future. If you look at that photo, I know it sounds crazy to say this, but I'll show it to you. It literally tells the entire future of what I'm supposed to do. It's absolutely baffling. And then my mom, as much as she was so worried about my future because she's never heard about stand up is a really viable art professional or a career path. It's a long one. It's an arduous one. Of course, she has every right to be like, this fucking sucks.
Dax Shepard
I know. Engineering results in a roof over your head.
Mo Amer
Yeah, exactly. But she didn't really understand. And then she told me recently, she goes, when you were 18 months, when you barely could start walking, you're running around, you would turn off the TV and you would start entertaining us on front of the television. It's already there. I don't know why it's there, but it's there. But then this picture, bro, it'll freak you out. I gotta pull it up.
Monica Padman
Yeah, we need to see it. Okay, we have the picture up.
Mo Amer
This is in Egypt. This is the last family vacation in 1988. I'm in the red short, right? Yep, 1988. The guy that has hands on my shoulders, his name is Yousef Idris. He's literally one of the most legendary screenplay and authors of any generation in the Middle East. Okay. I'm wearing a shirt that's basically a US military recruitment shirt that nobody knows I'm wearing. Clearly we've run out of stuff because we extended our stay.
Monica Padman
It says, join the forces.
Mo Amer
Kill, Kill. It's absurd, right? My mom clearly run out of shit, right? So it's there, it's gone. She just picked out a bunch of stuff. We ran out of things. She didn't even look at it. I have a camcorder. It's an over the shoulder camcorder. This is the very camcorder that I found 30 years later that's in the series. If you watch the ending, that's what I'm holding.
Dax Shepard
You show footage of your father in Palestine, right?
Mo Amer
I do. When my aunt told me about this camcorder, I was literally asking about it. Two days prior, I was on tour in the Middle East. I look at my manager, I'm like, look at this picture. I was reflecting on this photo and I was like, wait, what does this fucking shirt Say. And I started zooming into it. I was like, oh, my God. And I look at the camcorder. I was like, I have so many memories with this camcorder. It's insane. I was like, most of. Isn't it crazy? The guy who has hands on my shoulders is one of the greatest writers of our generation of filmmakers, storytellers. I have a camcorder in my hand. The two main characters after me in my show is my mom and my brother. And the US military invades Kuwait two years after this.
Monica Padman
That is wild.
Dax Shepard
Oh, yeah. That's really, really.
Mo Amer
It's so insane. And the camcorder itself goes missing. I think it's gone. And bring this up in Kuwait. I'm being really reflective. It's very painful. And also, I'm going there. They're building a tent for me to do a show. It's like, oh, my God, what's happened? Really? In this deep sense of reflection, my aunt is going in and out of memory. She's having Alzheimer's, starting to really get worse. But she remembers me holding my hand. Don't go, don't go, don't go. I'm just looking at the clock. I was like, I'm so sorry. I have to go up in, like an hour. I have to go. She's, like, begging not to go. It was so gut wrenching. I'm sitting there in my hotel room just crying.
Dax Shepard
Yeah, bro.
Mo Amer
I wonder what happened to this camcorder. I always remember this. I'm just reflecting and how everything is happening. I hear people cheering from outside the room. 2000 seat or whatever they built for me.
Dax Shepard
This is just surreal, trying to integrate.
Mo Amer
All this, trying to just make sense of it all. Like, how did this all happen? It's nuts. I was like, everybody, can you please leave? I just didn't know how to reconcile it. But I was having not, like, anxiety about going on, but I just didn't know how to channel my feelings anymore. And so I call actually FaceTime. Dave, he was like, oh, man. Ian had one of the best fucking sets you ever had. I already see it. And I just wiped my tears like, you, right? Went up. Literally one of the best. I did 90 minutes just destroying the place. Freestyling, integrating Arabic to English. It was like a masterclass. It was like, fuck it. Two days later, when I'm on Jordan, I'm visiting my other aunt and we're hugging, kisses. She's loving on me. She's like another mom to me. We just ate a really dense meal and I was trying not to, like, pass out. And I hear her say, or hear of a curb quarter. That's what it sounded like to me. I was like, what? Oh, God, it's so sleepy. I was like, did she say a camcorder? No. And I didn't register it. Then I see her walk back in. She has back problems. She's in her late 70s. This camcorder. I was like, what the. I just freaked out. And then my cousin walks in with a bag full of VHS tapes. I was like, what is going on, dude? That night, I'm in the hotel room. I'm staring at the video camera. I have my opening act, Adi Khalifa, and my manageable stuff in the room. I can't stop thinking about it. And Adi goes, you want to see if it works, don't you? I was like, yeah. I open it up. Yeah, plug it in. Comes right on. I was like, give me a VHS tape. Give me. I could watch in the little viewfinder. First tape, Michael Jackson. I was like, I'll take it out the next tape, Michael Jackson. I was like, guys, next tape. It's a house party. We don't know where. We don't know what it is. I watch him for about five minutes. I was like, oh, where's my dad? I really want to see my dad. I was like, he's probably filming, damn it. Right as I say that, he walks into the frame. He's taking pictures of everybody. He's, like, dancing. I'm losing it. I'm, like, laughing. Yeah, crying, laughing, crying. Meanwhile, my friend Adi, my opening eye. I didn't know he was filming, but I was for 17 minutes watching. He filmed the entire thing. And I caught footage of me as a little kid in our house in Kuwait. And it was just insane to get footage from my dad that I didn't know existed anymore. Nobody had. And I found it almost 30 years later.
Dax Shepard
Stay tuned for more Armchair Expert if you dare. Did it almost help you go, oh, yeah, that was real?
Mo Amer
It did. That's a great way to put it.
Dax Shepard
It's so far away in so many ways, geographically and time wise to see it. I would imagine you go, like, all right. I haven't imagined this whole thing.
Mo Amer
No, this is absolutely real. And of course, seeing my mom and young, and she's serving fruits, and there was a tape where we're at our house. And my dad was very hospitable. He just loves artists as well. He'd have people there. It was guys reciting poetry, freestyling, and they would get your name. He would Go Dax, Dax, dax. Da daaaaa. You know, they would play off of it and they would go on a rant about you. It was so special. And I'm sitting there wide awake and all the little kids are, like, sleeping, except me. You can tell I'm loving this.
Dax Shepard
You went in on it.
Mo Amer
It was super cool. And just having footage of my dad grabbing me like that, it was just killed me, man. I was like, so happy. While I'm recreating this scene, forget that id, because I cast him as my cousin in the show. And as we're about to do the scene, he goes, remember, I was with you when that happened. He's like, remember I filmed it. I was like, oh, my God, Eddie. That's right. I sent it to my editor. I was like, hey, here's the doc footage of me discovering it. Here's the actual footage that's on there. If you could just hold it for me and then do a rough cut at the end so people know that there's a real story.
Dax Shepard
Yeah.
Mo Amer
And when I saw it in the cut, I, like, lost my fucking mind, weeping, like, what did I just do? It was like one of those things that only the divine can facilitate. Something like that. It's impossible.
Monica Padman
I think it's hard when people die. You kind of remember their death. That's the first thing that is top of mind. So to click back into their life when they were happy and joyous and living with vitality, that's a gift.
Mo Amer
I feel that.
Dax Shepard
Oh, that's beautiful. Now the show is twice 100% on Rotten Tomatoes. You won, and I'm very jealous. There's only one award I've ever coveted, and I campaign for all the time, and I don't even know what it gets awarded for. But the Peabody.
Mo Amer
Yes.
Dax Shepard
That to me feels like, oh, you transcended Hollywood somehow.
Mo Amer
It was beautiful.
Dax Shepard
It's kind of a rad group to join of the people I know for sure. Malcolm Gladwell.
Mo Amer
I felt that way about the AFI too. I was just in a room, and they only picked 10 shows and 10 films. And that's it.
Dax Shepard
That's so cool.
Mo Amer
And you're just in that room. You're like, oh, my God, Sigourney Weaver. Fucking Steven Spielberg, James Cameronite talking about watches like, Better Call Saul is honored. So you have everyone there. Bobkirk. I'm like, what's going going on, bro? It's nuts. And then they bring in Al Pacino to tell a story, like, out of nowhere. It was like, I hate award shows. You Know, I really hate award shows, but. Because there's a bunch of losers. But you guys are all winners. That's nice. Yeah, that's nice. He really walked in like that. He was like, I got a paper. I got a speech. But I fucking hate papers. I just want to tell you a little story. One of the best stories ever. I don't know. You know, the first role I did was Godfather. You heard of it? You know, I can't believe it. I'm fucking doing a Godfather. I just got to tell you before this, though, you know, I did a lot of drugs and alcohol. You know, it got me through a lot of hard times. It was really worked out well for me. I'm not advocating for it. I'm just saying it was really good for me. Let me tell you something. Did I get nominated for an Oscar? I couldn't believe it. I got nominated for an Oscar. So what I did was I took so many fucking Quaaludes and I drank so much, I was fucked up out of my mind. My manager at the time had to wash my hair. Couldn't even wash my fucking hair. Takes me to the Oscars. You know, we're at the Oscars, and I'm sitting in the chair, just fucking losing my mind. High, out of my mind, drunk. And then I realized, oh, my God, what if I win? I gotta walk up to the stage. Oh, no. Now I'm panicked. I look over, man. I was like, is it almost over? He goes, it's only been 40 minutes. We've still got another three hours to go. He goes, oh, no. Three hours. I can't handle it. And he was so paranoid. I was so paranoid about it. What if I win? I gotta walk on the stairs. I can't walk. It's impossible. I can't even stand up. How am I gonna go give a speech? It's not gonna work out. And it comes up. Our category finally comes up, and I go, the winner is Jack Lemmon. And I fucking celebrated. You know, I was so fucking happy. And the next day in the papers, they were like, look how beautiful Al Pacino is. What a great supporter of art supporting Jack Lemmon. And I was just happy I didn't fucking win and have to walk up on a goddamn stage hysterical. And then he goes, okay, I'll read from the paper. Now, since the baby was, like, right there. That was a great experience.
Dax Shepard
Yeah, that's rap. But it seems like the show's wrapped up.
Mo Amer
Yeah. Yes. Look, you get as many swings as you can, and you don't know how many you're gonna get. So I feel sincerely this second season is like a masterpiece. I feel like the eighth episode is something so unique. Chris Story gave me one of the sweetest compliments and he was just like, you did something really dangerous, but never inflammatory, which is an enormous feat. And it was tender, it was thoughtful, it was sweet, it was heartfelt, it was funny. And kudos to you. When he said that to me, I was like, thank you. I felt really seen because it was almost basically an impossible position to be in. Do you talk about October 7th? Do you have it? Do you get into it the season.
Dax Shepard
One wrap on October?
Mo Amer
No, season one didn't really have a particular date to it, but I decided to date the entire second season. So when it opens up in the first episode of season two, you could see it's September 2022 and then it takes us all the way to October of 23. But then the whole season ends on the 6th of October in Tel Aviv airport before their strip search. So I did that very deliberately because every time I started. First of all, if we talk about it, then that means the family doesn't get to go back. Obviously they can't go back and visit if there's a war going on. Not going to happen. Secondly, you're making everything seem like it all started at that point, which is also not fair. And people need to know contextually what the world looked like before that. Thirdly, every time I started getting into it, it became a full blown Dr. And the base of the show is comedy. And we explored it. I wanted to see what it looked like. I'd do a gut check. Right away I was like, does not feel good. That's not it. You only have two seasons. This is the best foot forward here. And if there's a scenario where a third comes around or the question comes up, do you want to do it? Do you want to get into it? I'd have to really think about it because I genuinely believe I'm being objective. Sincerely. The first season was really, really hard and I'm blessed that we able to get all the accolades we did for the first season. But what I was able to pull off with second season, I feel so blessed that I had such a great support system wife, my having a son at the same time being so focused on nothing else and just so zoned in about making sure to tell the best possible story. And I feel like we did that. I'm so relieved, you know what I mean? Because it is an impossible position.
Dax Shepard
A lot of opportunity for failure.
Mo Amer
Exactly.
Dax Shepard
Whenever you take on something that has about 90 ways it can go bad and then a couple good.
Mo Amer
We're also people who have their own projections on the subject matter, which is everyone. Exactly. Which is immigration, Latinos. It's not just a Palestinian family. Represents many different buckets. Right. We go into a detention center in episode two. I've never seen that in any show, much less a comedy. But also telling these detailed stories showing also how privileged I am as a refugee in comparison to other people's experiences.
Dax Shepard
Another guy's talking about cartel apprehending them.
Mo Amer
For four days, and he's like, how'd you get here? Like, well, I took a bus, and then I took a short feel. Or like, you know, in the 90s, we fled the Gulf War, you know, then we took a flight. I think it was delta. So just showing how absurd even I am in my own scenario. And I just love that misdirection of, like, you think it's going to be a hypersexual comedic situation, and then it goes into a political conversation, which things do, especially in that environment.
Dax Shepard
I would put the mask on.
Mo Amer
Yeah. I wouldn't. I couldn't do it. If anybody else in the room have performance anxiety. For sure. Any sexual activity. For sure.
Dax Shepard
Ambassador wants him to fuck his wife.
Mo Amer
With a luchador mask. Yeah.
Dax Shepard
Luchador mask.
Mo Amer
Yeah. Palestino. To do it.
Dax Shepard
He doesn't want to do it. I was like, oh, that would have been easy.
Mo Amer
I physically can't do it at all. So I was genuinely me. I know you told the line between the character of myself, but I remember having, like, a girlfriend, and she had this dog, and he kept looking at me while we're. I was like, dude, stop looking. I was like, I can't. You got to get this dog out of here, bro. It's making me feel terrible about myself.
Dax Shepard
Our old dog, she loved to watch.
Mo Amer
More than so shy, bro. I'm telling you, I'm super shy. Even if it's a pet.
Monica Padman
A loved one.
Mo Amer
Yes. Like, bro, what are you doing?
Dax Shepard
But our dog Lola didn't just want to observe. She wanted to, like, walk around and get a little closer. Sometimes I feel fur on my leg.
Mo Amer
No, come on.
Dax Shepard
And then I was like, lola's a fucking pervert. And I was like, wait, is that what's going on? Or when Lola looks at me, I feel like a pervert. I'm aware of how perverted I am with this third person.
Mo Amer
I'm really sad we brought this up now. No, it was fun. To play with that.
Dax Shepard
Okay, so now you're on tour, and.
Mo Amer
The name of your tour is El Oso Palestino Tour. The Palestinian Bear Tour.
Dax Shepard
The Palestinian Bear, which is a play.
Mo Amer
On the character in the show. It's just side jobs to make a living in Mexico. He's a luchador, but he's really just there to get his ass kicked. He doesn't have any skill set whatsoever. I did a few of those takes, bro. That shit is real, man. It hurt like a motherfucker. My back went out a few times like, dude, what is going on? They're like, hold on to the rope. Squeeze your abs, and then we're gonna hold you from your ankles, but you gotta hold. Hold yourself. I'm like, I'm not planking. It's an extraordinary plank. I could plank for several minutes. Shockingly, I can do it.
Dax Shepard
I do want to offend you. I knew you were a good planker.
Mo Amer
You can't tell on Facebook.
Dax Shepard
No, we already know about the athleticism.
Mo Amer
You're a good planker. Thank you. I appreciate it. Gracias. For real. It's a female. He's, like, kicking my ass, and I'm like, bro, this is it. Where's the stunt guy? Get him in there. I thought this was gonna be fun. This was disaster. Get me out of the suit. It's hot. I'm sweating. I did black Adam. I can do my own stunts. Let's go. No, I can' I can't do all of them.
Dax Shepard
That's not your lane.
Mo Amer
Driving a car like a lunatic and getting thrown from the ropes are completely different things, buddy. Yeah, completely different things.
Dax Shepard
So how many dates are you doing?
Mo Amer
I think I've done 45 already. I'm not sure. You can get tickets on my website. Mohammer.com M O A M E R dot com. You follow me on Instagram. I gotta film another special, so I'm just going hard. I want this to be spectacular. I want it to be the best special that I've ever done. And I feel like, with getting older, having a son, and what's going on in the world, the way you filter things, and when you see things, everything is different. I see things really differently as a father, as a man, just coming off of season two itself and how really massive lift that was and relief of seeing people, the reception that I'm getting on the road now, it's one of the most beautiful things.
Dax Shepard
Yeah.
Monica Padman
How is your Instagram? Because Instagram is. Well, social media is a cesspool.
Mo Amer
Yeah, really? It really is. It's tough.
Monica Padman
It's tough. Do you face a lot of backlash and weird stuff there?
Mo Amer
I try not to look, number one. I really, really avoid it. I have a team that curates. I approve everything because I really don't want to spend my days online and on social. It was so time consuming and vacuous and everyone's just yelling at each other. No one's really making sense. There's no actual progress being made.
Dax Shepard
It's just people declaring what side of every fight they're on.
Mo Amer
Exactly. And then the worst part of it to me is no one's listening to one. So you're talking and I'm just thinking about how I'm going to respond.
Dax Shepard
You're not there to learn anything. You're there to broadcast your position and to fight.
Mo Amer
Exactly. So I've avoided that. And sincerely, I haven't had any issue like with season two. I think that the balance was perfect and the fact that it was based off of my actual experience in life and that you could see. Not all of it. Surely you fictionalize certain things, but a substantial amount of it is copy paste what the divine is giving me on a silver platter. You don't want to mess with that. You can't write anything better than that.
Dax Shepard
You're holding the camcorder.
Mo Amer
Just go with that and build around it and making sure to expand it and make sure it flows into the overall story. And that's it. Stay focused and have the right balance of comedy and drama and emotion tapped into it and take people on this ride and let it do the talking.
Dax Shepard
Well, not to be too corny and make you uncomfortable, I appreciate it so much. Rami, for me, was the first big. Like, I really, really enjoyed almost being forced to see what the experience is like.
Mo Amer
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
And same with you. And so I'm grateful we live in this. The negative would be like a niche economy of content. But the great part of it is I get to watch Atlanta.
Mo Amer
It's a great era. I hope the pressure doesn't stop these stories from being told. Yeah, that's the scary part is that a lot of people at my shows were like, how'd they let you do it? One guy said, how are you alive? I was like, bro, pray for me. What the fuck are you talking about? How about life is a good sweet. Honestly, that's how shocked people are because that's how extreme the suppression of free speech has become. And if we don't like what you're saying, then we can just literally deport you to another country, like, what the fuck is going on right now?
Monica Padman
I know.
Mo Amer
Yeah, I don't really worry about it, but I just hope that it doesn't happen. I hope that the artist community specifically here in LA and Hollywood, they understand, like, we need more of these stories. You can't suppress speech if you don't like what somebody's saying. You just need more speech. Right?
Monica Padman
Yeah, exactly.
Mo Amer
You don't need less. Everybody gets to shit. Share their stories. You don't have to love it, you don't have to hate it. You can appreciate it.
Dax Shepard
Yeah. Well, have fun touring and then also act more, because I love watching you act. You really are just born to do it. You're so effortlessly comfortable. Mo, I'm delighted to meet you. I'm so glad you came and did this.
Mo Amer
Yeah. So I'll get to know both you. Really, truly. This is so fun.
Dax Shepard
Oh, good.
Mo Amer
I really, really. What a great experience. I'm gonna do this in my garage.
Dax Shepard
You should.
Monica Padman
You really.
Dax Shepard
You got a garage?
Mo Amer
Just me just sitting there.
Dax Shepard
All you need is a garage.
Mo Amer
All right, brother. Thank you so much.
Dax Shepard
He is an armchair expert, but he makes mistakes all the time. Thank God Monica's here. She's gotta let him have the facts. Oh, this is fun.
Monica Padman
This is.
Dax Shepard
So you hit me with an idea.
Monica Padman
Yep.
Dax Shepard
Which is after we chit chat for a while and we get into the facts. I'm going to cut your hair. While you read the facts?
Monica Padman
Yes. Because you have boasted many a time about your haircutting capabilities.
Dax Shepard
Yeah.
Monica Padman
And I've never experienced it. And I need a haircut so badly.
Dax Shepard
I know, but I told you, this is not the situation. Like, I need you on a tall chair in the kitchen with a lot of light, and we got to discuss what you want. But you. What you're telling me is you just want the ends trimmed.
Monica Padman
I mean, you can do some other stuff if you want.
Dax Shepard
Just some big new layers.
Monica Padman
Be careful, but you can play with it a little bit.
Dax Shepard
Okay. Okay, we'll see. We'll see what we can do.
Monica Padman
Okay.
Dax Shepard
But I do have my tools. I got my tools.
Monica Padman
Yeah, you got your scissors and your brush.
Dax Shepard
Like, normally I would use this comb, but I was thinking your hair. I don't know if I can get this comb through your hair. Can I?
Monica Padman
So have you ever.
Dax Shepard
I brought one of the girl's brushes.
Monica Padman
Have you ever cut hair on a podcast? Indian. On an Indian woman's head?
Dax Shepard
Yeah, I only do Indian women's.
Monica Padman
Oh, then you'll. Then you'll be fine. You'll be fine. With that comb, doll.
Dax Shepard
Think all Indian women have the same hair? I mean, they seem to. From my point of view, it seems pretty similar.
Monica Padman
I don't think they're exactly the same, but, yes, I think there's a thickness, yeah. Although Matt once told me. Matt, our friend, who's a hairstylist, told me that the actual strand itself is. Of. Mine is not that thick. It's more like medium.
Dax Shepard
It's the density.
Monica Padman
There's a lot of it.
Dax Shepard
So. Density.
Monica Padman
Density, yeah.
Dax Shepard
I've never seen a blonde Indian. Let's start there.
Monica Padman
No, they don't.
Dax Shepard
No, it's like green eyes. Cat eyes, as your father would say.
Monica Padman
Well, green eyes happens there sometimes. But no blonde hair.
Dax Shepard
No. Right.
Monica Padman
No, I've never heard of it.
Dax Shepard
There's got to be albino Indians.
Monica Padman
Well, exactly. That would be the. That would be the only Albinism.
Dax Shepard
We learned a cool word today on Armchair Anonymous.
Monica Padman
Oh, yeah.
Dax Shepard
Edenistic.
Monica Padman
No, Edenic.
Dax Shepard
Edenic, yeah.
Monica Padman
And it.
Dax Shepard
To describe an environment as Eden, like. Like the Garden of Eden.
Monica Padman
Yeah, I liked that.
Dax Shepard
God, I'm glad you remembered it, because I had. I said out loud, I'm going to commit that to my repertoire.
Monica Padman
Repertoire.
Dax Shepard
People love your David Chang story. I just want to add that I looked at the comments and people. Many people write, this is all of us.
Monica Padman
It's all of us. Right. We just don't know how to operate in the world. Humans do not know how to operate.
Dax Shepard
We get so nervous, as if, like, people get punctured, punched for doing it wrong or something.
Monica Padman
I did send it to Cali, of course. I sent her the text. She said, what is going on? And I responded and she said, but where is the bread from? Oh, we still don't know. A really important.
Dax Shepard
Rob can. Yeah, I'll ask. He'll handle that right now.
Monica Padman
Can you find out the bread that.
Dax Shepard
His children didn't eat that he brought home for his children?
Monica Padman
I was gonna say, oh, what you got there about.
Dax Shepard
Oh, there's a bit of a standoff in our household. So, Chris, Kristen, as you know, you've tried it. She's in her sourdough phase.
Monica Padman
I've never tried her.
Dax Shepard
You haven't?
Monica Padman
Only Amy's.
Dax Shepard
What about at Molly's birthday party? She brought over, like, two fresh loaves. You didn't get into it? I had some. I cheated. And I also. I was like, you know, I already told you this. I'm like, oh, sourdough's got the least amount of gluten. I can eat it. And I had it. There's Nothing better than sourdough out of an oven. Forget it. But anyways, my kids are like, where's the white bread?
Monica Padman
They miss the white bread and goes.
Dax Shepard
Like, I'm making the bread. You have homemade bread, right? Rightly so.
Monica Padman
Right.
Dax Shepard
And Delta's like, I want. I want little, square white pieces of bread. And I get it.
Monica Padman
You definitely get it. Of all people.
Dax Shepard
Because I'm a trash monster. I like crappy stuff.
Monica Padman
No, when you have your. You have your five dishes that you make that you used to make. Those were your special dishes. And one of them is a tuna salad sandwich. Excuse me. A chicken salad. It's been a minute. I haven't had it in a while. Chicken.
Dax Shepard
That one's hard because I don't eat bread anymore. And I gotta just eat this and watch you guys.
Monica Padman
Yeah, well, you can have it on this sourdough, I guess. How often are you cheating with this?
Dax Shepard
I'm not. When she got into the face, because you can't imagine waking up and the whole house smells like a loaf of sourdough. Like, it's actually now maddening that I. I don't. I had a week of it. I'm like, yeah, this is where it's not working. My skin sort of, like, aching. My wrist started hurting.
Monica Padman
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
I also gained, like, immediately. I just mysteriously gained, like, eight pounds.
Monica Padman
Sure. Well, we.
Dax Shepard
Yeah, go ahead. We. What do we talk about? That I gain and lose weight really quick?
Monica Padman
No, that, like, I think you're just underweight. Like, your body wants to weigh more. So of course it's like getting something and it's gonna hoard it.
Dax Shepard
I don't know if you inception me, but I've been eating more.
Monica Padman
Oh, yeah.
Dax Shepard
I'm not sure is it that or.
Monica Padman
Is it that you're. You got back from New York and you had all this yummy food, and now you want yummy food.
Dax Shepard
Well, then I got back down to 194.
Monica Padman
Right.
Dax Shepard
And then I think vanity. I'm like, I don't like my face at 194.
Monica Padman
No, maybe you are having, you know how they call them sympathy pains when a woman is pregnant and then the man also experiences pains.
Dax Shepard
You know, I gained a crazy, crazy amount of weight when Kristen was pregnant the first time.
Monica Padman
And you said that was, like, sympathy weight or something.
Dax Shepard
I just don't know what it was. But I find that every man I know has done that when there was.
Monica Padman
Because, like, the woman is eating more.
Dax Shepard
I think she's, like, driving it a little more because she's got these Weird urges and there's more around, and maybe that's part of it. And maybe you are like, you know, like, if you. I want people to think about this. The next time time you're at a booth at a restaurant talking with somebody, start paying attention. How you inadvertently mirror each other's body language. If someone puts their hand on their. Rest their. Their face on their fist, you'll do it. Just be aware of it.
Monica Padman
I mean, we don't.
Dax Shepard
In here.
Monica Padman
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
I wonder if we were at a booth at a restaurant, we would.
Monica Padman
Oh, thanks.
Dax Shepard
We had an expert on saying something about dad bod that, like, the. The husband or the father stores bod fat differently in his body when his wife's pregnant. Oh. Knowing that he's not gonna sleep and. Oh, interesting. But my big thing was we were at one of the checkups, and I just hadn't been on a scale in, like, four or five months. When I got on, I was like, oh, my God, I've gained 22 pounds and I didn't even notice.
Monica Padman
Yeah, I think it's maybe more that. Like, she's eating more.
Dax Shepard
Oh, yeah.
Monica Padman
There's more on her plate. Literally.
Dax Shepard
Yeah.
Monica Padman
So then you're just matching that.
Dax Shepard
Yeah. Something happens. It's pretty consistent.
Monica Padman
You might be having sympathy weight. Weight gain from us all being on our periods.
Dax Shepard
Could be. That's a good story, Whiskers.
Monica Padman
Oh, okay. Oh, no, don't. This is.
Dax Shepard
Yes, of course. This is a good story for whiskey. No, I don't need to say who.
Monica Padman
Oh, okay.
Dax Shepard
I mean, why is it embarrassing to have a period?
Monica Padman
I'd be embarrassed.
Dax Shepard
Yeah.
Monica Padman
I be embarrassed by that story.
Dax Shepard
Oh, okay. I don't think she would, but I won't risk it.
Monica Padman
Well, there's a woman, but there's only.
Dax Shepard
There's a lot of women in my house. Nicole's there nonstop. My sister's there nonstop. I got. Kristen's there nonstop. This is a bevy of urine and out of there.
Monica Padman
Yeah. It's not me.
Dax Shepard
I have some tampons in those trash cans for sure.
Monica Padman
Maybe years ago. I don't really use tampons anymore.
Dax Shepard
Oh, you're over it.
Monica Padman
I use period underwear.
Dax Shepard
Okay. That's the rage I use.
Monica Padman
And there's a lot of rages. People use the cup.
Dax Shepard
Yeah. We talk about this. You don't. You're empty.
Monica Padman
I'm just afraid of it. I'm not anti.
Dax Shepard
And we have a friend. We won't outer, but we have a friend in the pod that uses the diva cup.
Monica Padman
Yeah. And she also told us A story of someone she knows. She was at a wedding and a girl's popped it, you know, pop and locked.
Dax Shepard
She was dancing. She was dancing and the cup spilled.
Monica Padman
It fell out and on the blood flew everywhere.
Dax Shepard
How does the cup pass your underpants?
Monica Padman
She wasn't wearing any.
Dax Shepard
What a kinky broad. She's on her period, not wearing undies. And on the dance floor, popping and locking.
Mo Amer
Who. Who is this woman?
Dax Shepard
Do I know her?
Monica Padman
No. If you're able. I mean, it's like suctioned up there. You should be able to.
Dax Shepard
You should be able to go underwearless to a wedding.
Monica Padman
I mean, technically, I. I'm sure when I.
Dax Shepard
You don't think if I did something like that, you'd be like. That's so arrogant. You know you would.
Monica Padman
Yeah, I would say that. But listen, I have. I'm sure at some point in life when I was wearing tampons. Wore a tampon without an underwear. Oh, definitely. Like at a. At a. On. In a bathing suit.
Dax Shepard
But your bathing suits, the underwear.
Mo Amer
You're not.
Dax Shepard
Not wearing underwear ever.
Mo Amer
No, but.
Dax Shepard
And then add. Then you're on your period and you decide that's when you're going to not wear your underwear.
Monica Padman
Let me tell you why. If you're wearing a certain dress, like let's say you're going to a wedding or something, and you're wearing a certain dress and you don't want underwear lines. You'd go.
Dax Shepard
Even in the day of the thong and everything. That's still.
Monica Padman
Even still. Depending. I mean, there are some good underwears that you can use, but there are certain dresses, like, you can just see it. So there are times that go to more weddings. There are times that I haven't worn underwear.
Dax Shepard
You raw dog it.
Monica Padman
Yeah. And then.
Dax Shepard
No, commando.
Monica Padman
I commando. And if I'm on my period period, it. That's a tampon. And I'm not worried.
Dax Shepard
Can you think of a specific time ever? Like, this sounds so theoretical. Can you tell me a time you were on your period, put a tampon and went out of the house with a dress on and no underwear?
Monica Padman
Is that a real period for. I mean. I mean, since I was 11 or 12.
Dax Shepard
You got it at 11 or 12.
Monica Padman
I forget.
Dax Shepard
You live next to a nuclear reactor.
Monica Padman
No, I was an early bloomer.
Dax Shepard
Okay.
Mo Amer
Okay.
Monica Padman
And anyway, I have been on it for a really long time. And then I like, I know the feeling of what it is to have a tampon in. And not have underwear in your house.
Dax Shepard
I'm asking. Can you think of. Are you telling Me, right now. You have a memory of going out on a dress?
Monica Padman
Yes.
Dax Shepard
No undies on your period?
Monica Padman
Yes, I have a sense memory of it. I don't have an actual memory of it, but I have a sense of friends.
Dax Shepard
Dax, we have a commitment to each other here.
Monica Padman
Exactly.
Dax Shepard
To be honest, you can't believe each other. You can't feel like you did. You'd either you gotta say, I did or I didn't.
Monica Padman
That's not fair.
Dax Shepard
Okay, I apologize.
Monica Padman
Listen, I remember I wore a dress sort of recently, that I didn't wear underwear. I do know that. And I kind of feel like I was on my period. Did that.
Dax Shepard
Okay.
Monica Padman
And I think I wore a tampon, specifically because I don't really wear tampons anymore. And I remember I had to wear it.
Dax Shepard
Yeah.
Monica Padman
Because it's weird.
Dax Shepard
It's weird to say wear it.
Monica Padman
I know.
Dax Shepard
Wear a tampon.
Monica Padman
I had to put one in.
Dax Shepard
Yeah. Plug. Plug.
Monica Padman
I was. I will. I would never be worried about popping and locking and the tampon falling out.
Dax Shepard
No, of course. Yeah.
Monica Padman
So I can see why. The Diva Cup. You wouldn't.
Dax Shepard
I have no experience with it, but it seems crazy. There's a cup in there that's relying on a suction seal and that. That seal couldn't break anyone who's ever used any suction cups.
Monica Padman
Yeah, they're wi. More. It's like. I think it's, like, big. So. So the fact that the whole thing is up there, it does feel like a teacup. Like, kind of, I think, but rubbery, I think.
Dax Shepard
But as big as. Like a coffee cup.
Monica Padman
No, not a.
Mo Amer
It's like a golf ball, maybe.
Monica Padman
No, bigger than that.
Dax Shepard
Much bigger than a golf ball.
Mo Amer
Natalie.
Dax Shepard
Natalie uses them.
Monica Padman
She does?
Mo Amer
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
Your dog ever eaten it?
Mo Amer
No.
Dax Shepard
Okay, well, let me get to the story.
Monica Padman
Okay, fine. Tell the story.
Dax Shepard
There's a lot of updates on Whiskey.
Monica Padman
Okay.
Dax Shepard
A new update on Whiskey is he's a bad to the bone. That doesn't help me because it needs to be next to a Bic lighter or something.
Monica Padman
Here it is next to a micro penis. A tampon.
Dax Shepard
Oh, okay. So it's the same length as a Tampax. Okay, so Whiskey gives you to know some updates about Whiskey. Okay, One thing is he's bad to the bone.
Mo Amer
Okay?
Dax Shepard
He's killed over a hundred men.
Monica Padman
What are you talking about?
Dax Shepard
Whiskey's eaten 100 men. He's bad to the bone.
Monica Padman
Okay, you just really want to say bad to the bone.
Dax Shepard
Like, I wanted to tell you about Whiskey.
Monica Padman
I know.
Dax Shepard
Well, you know, first of all, he was trim, and he was president of the hallway.
Monica Padman
Right.
Dax Shepard
And I wanted to tell you about that, and you seem to enjoy that.
Monica Padman
No, I want to hear about Whiskey. And I. I know he's bad to the bone.
Dax Shepard
He's. He's eating 100 men and 150 women, but he doesn't talk about that.
Monica Padman
He's sounding kind of like.
Dax Shepard
Okay, so he's bad to the bone.
Monica Padman
Okay.
Dax Shepard
And someone in my household put a tampon in the trash can, which is advisable for your plumbing.
Monica Padman
Correct.
Dax Shepard
So I'm on a high five. This unnamed person who put a tampon because whiskey's bad to the bone. He loves blood.
Monica Padman
Ew.
Dax Shepard
He went and ate the tampon. Okay.
Monica Padman
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
Then. And I am get. She won't mind this. I just want you know she won't mind this. And this is a big honorable mention, because this. I've said this before. My sister Carly is down when shit needs. When the gnarly stuff needs to get done. My sister will do it.
Monica Padman
She will.
Dax Shepard
She is. She's fearless. So they were taking Whiskey back to the bone to On a walk, and he pooped out half a tampon.
Monica Padman
Yep.
Dax Shepard
And then a little while longer, he pooped out, tried to poop out the rest of the tampon. And now the cord, the string, the rope.
Monica Padman
Oh.
Dax Shepard
And now he's got a rope hanging out of his butt. And he's a bastard. Right. So you can't get close to him.
Monica Padman
Yeah, he'll bite. He'll bite you.
Dax Shepard
He'll eat you like the 100 men he's eaten. And so Carly's trying to get this thing out of his butt, and he's trying to bite her. And this whole thing, it's a battle. Then I guess she had to take him to her house and put him in the sink and get him warm water on him, because he calms down when he gets a battle.
Monica Padman
Oh, my God.
Dax Shepard
And then she had to pull this thing out of him. These dogs, man.
Monica Padman
You are so lucky that your sister. Sister did that because he would have died of tss.
Mo Amer
That's what.
Dax Shepard
That's what Kristen goes.
Mo Amer
I.
Dax Shepard
Is he gonna get toxic shock syndrome? I'm like, no, Your butt is so different than your vagina. No.
Monica Padman
Yeah, maybe. Hit. Hit. We don't know about you proctologist on.
Dax Shepard
I don't think you can get toxic shock syndrome in your butthole from a Tampax.
Monica Padman
You can, and it's a tampon.
Dax Shepard
Tampax is the brand I approved.
Mo Amer
Prefer.
Dax Shepard
Kind of like. I like Huggies. Tampax Radiant. They always man these ad campaigns and I. I tip my hat to them because what a product to have to sell on tv. And, you know, they have these commercials and someone's like, sailing. They like to put you like in a nautical situation.
Monica Padman
Yeah. Because you. That's when you need a tampon. When you're in a bathing suit. That's why.
Dax Shepard
Yeah. This was more, I think, like, oh, it's going to be a long sailboat. Right. I don't know. It's always like someone's in a field and there's a lot of flowers. Like they're trying of destigmatize. I guess it keep whiskey away. But yeah, they got to name it. Whatever name. I just Radiant or something. I just. I think they have their work cut out for them and I applaud them.
Monica Padman
Yeah, yeah, I get it.
Dax Shepard
God bless them. Well, you got to sell Depends.
Monica Padman
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
Hard product to sell.
Monica Padman
In some ways it's a hard product. In some ways it sells itself because, like. Well, yeah, you need it.
Dax Shepard
You need them.
Monica Padman
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
You know, one's on the fence about getting Depends. Or you either need Depends or you don't.
Monica Padman
Well, maybe that's why tampons have had to step up their game because there are competing period underwear.
Dax Shepard
I don't like the. The branding of this.
Monica Padman
Why do you like it?
Dax Shepard
Period underwear.
Monica Padman
I mean, that's what I call it.
Dax Shepard
Grab my period underwear. Don't you think there's a, like. I think the Tampax people should take a stab at period underwear, because I think they could top it. Well, it's not all like, freedom panties or something.
Monica Padman
Let me finish.
Dax Shepard
Yeah, sorry. So excited to talk about female products.
Monica Padman
I know. It's. It's. There are brands. Nyx. Nyx is a brand. So you don't. You don't have to say pen, period under where you can say, like, my Nixies. Sure. Nixies. Regular nicks.
Dax Shepard
Yeah. It already starts with an X, so I love it.
Monica Padman
Is it N I X and then there's.
Dax Shepard
Or is it N I, C, K.
Monica Padman
S, K, N I X. Oh, great.
Dax Shepard
K, N, I. So like knitting.
Monica Padman
And then there's Thinx. That's a huge brand.
Dax Shepard
Another ax.
Monica Padman
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
That's a trusted letter in the vaginal space.
Monica Padman
It is. Maybe they are steal. Not stealing. Maybe they are inspired buy. They're building upon the tampons.
Dax Shepard
Yeah. The trusted. The trust that these people have tirelessly built with this product. That is.
Monica Padman
You know, this is. Look, nothing against the tampon industry, but this is better for you.
Dax Shepard
If I was in the ad game, I would want to get put on Tampax because you want to bite off a lot, you know, like, you want to challenge. It's like, if you're an actor, you want to play someone dying of something or whatever, you know, you want a challenge. And I would like, I think, to cut my teeth and make a name for myself. I'd love to just, like, blow out a Tampax campaign.
Monica Padman
Okay, how are you going to get these people back on tampons? The people that have left to the.
Dax Shepard
You want me to just, like, right off the cuff?
Monica Padman
Yeah. You're in a meeting right now. Here we are, guys. Our sales are plummeting.
Dax Shepard
And why?
Monica Padman
Because there's all these competing trends now that, look, I hate to say, say. And this doesn't leave this room. They're better for the women's bodies.
Dax Shepard
Wait, nothing is better. What if you're sailing the cup you're supposed to carry? What you're trying to tell me is a woman on in her cycle is supposed to have a purse full of underwear.
Monica Padman
No, they'd use.
Dax Shepard
That's not a move for an elegant lady out on the town.
Monica Padman
Yeah, see, this is the fact that.
Dax Shepard
You got to carry extra undies with you.
Monica Padman
What are you talking about?
Dax Shepard
Well, once you've. Once you've soiled your necks just like a tampon, you got to change it.
Monica Padman
Well, no.
Dax Shepard
So you got to change these onions.
Monica Padman
No, you wash it.
Mo Amer
You.
Monica Padman
You. You technically rinse it out.
Dax Shepard
Yeah. Oh, yeah. This is. I got a lot to work with here.
Monica Padman
But also, the cup is different.
Dax Shepard
Are you. Forget the cup. We're talking.
Monica Padman
Well, that's a huge thing.
Dax Shepard
This is Tampax versus underpants.
Monica Padman
Okay, fine.
Dax Shepard
Are you trying to tell me that the day you get your period, you put on a pair of necks and you leave them on for the duration? Okay, great.
Monica Padman
But I leave mine on all day.
Dax Shepard
Even a very heavy, heavy day. I want to be. Choose my words carefully.
Monica Padman
Yeah, I do. My flow, at its heaviest, one can sustain it.
Dax Shepard
What if you go on a sailboat?
Monica Padman
Then I'm wearing a tampon.
Dax Shepard
Bingo. So we build on that for the. For the adventurer. For the person engaged.
Monica Padman
Sure.
Dax Shepard
If you're a couch potato, wear nicks. If you want to get out and see the world. If you don't want your period to keep you sidelined on the bench, you still want to go sailing and go to amusement parks, there's only one brand for you. Because you can carry extras in your purse discreetly, like an elegant lady.
Monica Padman
Ew. I.
Dax Shepard
No one wants to have no one. You know what I would do is I would have. Thank you, Monica. Here we go. I got my pitch. Okay, We're. We start the commercial with a woman in line at an amusement park. Everyone's having a great time. Her child asks her for a sucker. She goes in her purse to get it. The purse comes dislodged and on the ground tumbles five pairs of underpants. She's mortified. And then a girl next to her looks at her purse and she's got Tampax in there. And then she winks. Pretty good spot. No one wants underwear to tumble out of their bag.
Monica Padman
I would.
Dax Shepard
At the Amusement Park 100.
Monica Padman
No one wants tampons to fly everywhere.
Dax Shepard
Well, they want it because they're not humongous.
Mo Amer
Like.
Monica Padman
Yes.
Dax Shepard
Like underpants.
Monica Padman
Or if they think it's a no. Men. All the men off of this campaign immediately. This is so embarrassing and bad. Absolutely not. Absolutely not. Every woman has been in a situation where a tank. Tampons falling out. And it's like the most mortifying. It is so upsetting.
Dax Shepard
What would be.
Monica Padman
Pond falls out of your backpack.
Dax Shepard
I want you to be. Please be honest.
Monica Padman
I am.
Dax Shepard
You get to choose.
Monica Padman
Yes.
Dax Shepard
You're. You're on a date with this unnamed guy that was at Saturday Live. And your purse falls over in either a gigantic pair of underwear. Fallout. Because they're big, right? To cover everything.
Monica Padman
Hold on.
Dax Shepard
Am I imagining seeing them correctly?
Monica Padman
We're not. Okay. I need to take a break.
Mo Amer
Okay.
Monica Padman
Okay.
Dax Shepard
Call time.
Monica Padman
As we've established, I am currently on my period.
Dax Shepard
Yeah. So where are you keeping all these other underwear?
Monica Padman
Exactly where do you see? There's no. I'm not carrying any underwear. There's no underwear in my bag. You don't.
Dax Shepard
I think you're reckless. I think you need a backup pair on you. I'm not going to say who. I know. I know someone who wears them. And they. They go through a couple of days.
Monica Padman
Yeah, sure. Some people do.
Dax Shepard
Yeah.
Monica Padman
Same as your tamper.
Dax Shepard
So that person has to carry an extra pair of these grundles around. Okay. Okay. So we just concede the fact that someone might need to be carrying grundles with them. Now, my question is your purse falls over at dinner on a date with a boy you like in either a very large pair of underwear.
Monica Padman
Fallout that they're very. They're not as big as you think. You think they're diapers? They're. They're not diapes.
Dax Shepard
That's another great angle. I'll start calling them diapes.
Monica Padman
No, stop. Okay, listen.
Dax Shepard
I never know when the fun's gonna end.
Monica Padman
Listen, I've put up with a lot here. Okay?
Dax Shepard
Okay.
Monica Padman
If this man would rather me get. Tss, slash, have to put cloth up my pussy.
Dax Shepard
Save cotton. Please don't use that word in the campaign. That's off putting one of the concerns.
Mo Amer
See.
Dax Shepard
Or no. No. That word doesn't work in advertising as much as I wish it did.
Monica Padman
Thank you for explaining that to me. If. If this man, this hot man who I think is kind and nice.
Dax Shepard
Yeah.
Monica Padman
And from another country. This man is.
Dax Shepard
Oh, that's. You're giving away a lot of clues.
Monica Padman
I think this man from another country really understands that.
Dax Shepard
You better find out.
Monica Padman
Americans are crazy.
Dax Shepard
That other countries a lot more buttoned up than this country.
Monica Padman
No. But not in this type of area.
Dax Shepard
Oh, yes.
Monica Padman
No.
Dax Shepard
Yes.
Monica Padman
Tax. You don't know what it's like to be a woman.
Dax Shepard
I know I don't. But I do know the difference between. I won't say the name of the country in our country and we are much more foul.
Monica Padman
Not in the female hygienic space.
Dax Shepard
Guys. There are like about everything.
Monica Padman
No. But in general, I, I. They wear more pads there. Okay.
Mo Amer
Okay.
Dax Shepard
So. So the, the answer. Your answer is.
Monica Padman
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
Lock in the answer. You'd rather have a big pair of underwear fallout than a tampon.
Monica Padman
No, that's. I want to get a little more nuanced. I wouldn't. And stop saying big pair of underwear.
Dax Shepard
They're bigger than the ones you normally wear. They're not like there's a pair you'd be happy to fall out. Right. We agree on that.
Monica Padman
Listen, I'm currently wearing.
Dax Shepard
Huh?
Monica Padman
A thong period underwear.
Mo Amer
Oh.
Monica Padman
This is what I'm saying. You don't understand.
Dax Shepard
I haven't seen that product. I've seen different versions.
Monica Padman
Yes. And it looks. It has lace.
Dax Shepard
Oh, wow.
Monica Padman
It looks like underwear.
Dax Shepard
Okay. Okay.
Monica Padman
Hot underwear.
Dax Shepard
Okay, great.
Monica Padman
Now what I wouldn't want to happen. I will say. I will say this. What I would not want to happen is my bag falls out dirty period Underwear falls out. That now.
Dax Shepard
And be honest. You're not going to pitch him in the trash can when you switch. No grundles in the turlet. So yeah. There's. You could be in a situation where you're carrying.
Monica Padman
I'm personally not though, so I can't.
Dax Shepard
But for the person who does have to change midday, they have to carry that around. So. Okay. They clearly now they also have to carry a Ziploc bag. Great product. I wish I was on that campaign. I swear by Ziplocs. Now they have. Not only do they have this, you know.
Mo Amer
Go on.
Dax Shepard
A pair of underwear. I'll leave it at that.
Monica Padman
Thank you.
Dax Shepard
That are soiled.
Monica Padman
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
In a Ziploc bag. I mean, now this is a little. This is crazy. Cuz the guy who's not as in a feminist like me, who I already know about all these products.
Mo Amer
You don't.
Dax Shepard
But for the untrained guy, okay. He sees a pair of undies in a Ziploc bag. Monica. I'll tell you a thou thousand percent what he thinks happened. She herself.
Monica Padman
Okay.
Dax Shepard
That's a Ziploc bag full of shitty underwear.
Monica Padman
Okay. And is it hot?
Dax Shepard
Well, now you're. Now you're. That's an interesting counter.
Monica Padman
See, now listen. This is what I. Yes. Would I rather a little tampon Delicate. It's not delicate.
Dax Shepard
Yeah. Some inspiration. What was it called?
Monica Padman
Radiant.
Dax Shepard
Radiant. A radiant tampon falls out.
Monica Padman
Falls out. Yes. I would prefer that to dirty period underwear. Hang out at a restaurant in a Ziploc bag. Better in a Ziploc bag at least than on its own.
Dax Shepard
But it says they poop themselves.
Monica Padman
If that happened. The underwear. Ziploc bag slash regular stinky underwear.
Dax Shepard
When it happens.
Monica Padman
You. I would say that's embarrassing. That. Oh no. This is like David Chang all over again. No, I would address it. I would address it. I'd be like.
Dax Shepard
And there's flies to do. Just.
Mo Amer
There's.
Dax Shepard
Immediately there's a swarm. In fact, before he even sees it, he hears, whoa, is there a swarm? I heard a swarm of flies.
Monica Padman
No.
Dax Shepard
And then whiskey runs across the restroom.
Monica Padman
Oh my God. I would say I. I don't wear tampons anymore because they're not good for you.
Dax Shepard
Oh. And I. I'd say I'm so glad you're taking care of your.
Mo Amer
Yourself.
Monica Padman
Exactly. And that's the end of that.
Dax Shepard
Yeah.
Monica Padman
Know what you think?
Dax Shepard
Well. Okay. Say that again.
Monica Padman
That's so embarrassed. I'm so embarrassed. I just don't wear tampons anymore because they're not great for you. For women's bodies.
Dax Shepard
And because you.
Mo Amer
Not.
Dax Shepard
You don't wear tampons anymore.
Mo Amer
You.
Dax Shepard
You had an act. You pooped your pants.
Monica Padman
Oh, no. Is that what you think? Yeah.
Dax Shepard
Because it's in Ziploc.
Monica Padman
Oh, no, no. Sorry, sorry. It's just. It's just period underwear. All.
Dax Shepard
I'm starving. Let's see the discernment.
Monica Padman
I hate men. All men off the campaign.
Dax Shepard
Now let's see what kind of appetizers they got. You're not can we have a can of Raid?
Monica Padman
Like you aren't having sex with people on their p. Oh, absolutely.
Dax Shepard
I love it. I love it.
Monica Padman
Police.
Dax Shepard
Yeah. One of my. Yeah, I'm going to leave that there. Yeah. Yes, of course. I don't give a. I also don't care if you have shitty underwear in your purse. But I do think I'm a rare. Rare customer.
Monica Padman
I think you're probably a rare customer.
Dax Shepard
But I would be like, oh, so glad your. Your pants. Now I gotta tell you about 25 stories.
Monica Padman
Yeah. Look, it's tough.
Dax Shepard
Yeah, it's okay. Well, Mother's Day is right around the corner, so think about getting mom either of these options. Whatever you found to be a compelling. There's argument.
Monica Padman
We've said three now. Diva cup.
Mo Amer
Yeah.
Monica Padman
Underwear.
Dax Shepard
Yeah. Choice is yours. If you're a pop and locker, you wear dresses. These are all things you got to consider. Yeah, they're great. I'm just having fun. I'm having a good time. And you were, too.
Monica Padman
Okay. So anyway, she pulled the tampon right out of there.
Dax Shepard
She's such a gangster. Car.
Monica Padman
And do you think there was now poop.
Dax Shepard
Let me honest. If I ever got in a situation where I. I had accidentally killed somebody and it was one of these scenarios where it's like, there's no way I can. My story's not gonna hold up. Like, literally, the choices are it was an accident. A. And my choices are call the police and go to prison forever. Cause it looks insane. Or get rid of the body and I can't do it myself. I do need one person.
Monica Padman
Okay.
Dax Shepard
And Aaron's in Detroit.
Monica Padman
Oh, okay.
Dax Shepard
I'm calling Carly.
Monica Padman
I. That's.
Dax Shepard
That's the right call, right?
Monica Padman
I mean, I'm upset, obviously, but that's not your lane. Well, cleaning up bodies, cutting up a body. Oh, it's cutting up. I thought we were burying it or putting it in the ocean or something.
Dax Shepard
It's Robert Durst.
Monica Padman
Okay. Yeah, I'd rather not.
Dax Shepard
Right.
Mo Amer
You know, there's other calls.
Monica Padman
You'd rather I would keep it a secret?
Dax Shepard
Yes. I would trust you to tell you this happened.
Monica Padman
Okay.
Dax Shepard
But I'm talking about the dirty business.
Monica Padman
I'm just also not very strong. Even though I've been doing my farmers carries intermittently. I did them last night.
Dax Shepard
Oh, you did?
Monica Padman
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
Oh, good. While you were watching er.
Monica Padman
No, when I was going to and from. I just do a glass of wine kind of.
Dax Shepard
Do you ever do them on your way to get another glass of wine?
Monica Padman
They are like, right there. I mean, I can't say I haven't done them after a night out.
Dax Shepard
Sure. Well, of course. Because you're feeling stronger than you are. You're feeling, like, overly confident.
Monica Padman
Yeah, I think I actually am ready, so. I've been doing two 40s.
Dax Shepard
Yeah.
Monica Padman
I think I might be ready to move up.
Dax Shepard
Good.
Monica Padman
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
Yeah.
Monica Padman
But I'm. I told you, you're not going very far. How far are you supposed to go?
Dax Shepard
Longer than to your kitchen, probably.
Monica Padman
Well, I go back and forth until it feels like it's really falling out of my hand.
Dax Shepard
Okay.
Monica Padman
You think that's bad?
Dax Shepard
I think you can look up. I want to say they're supposed to last either 30 seconds or a minute.
Monica Padman
Okay.
Dax Shepard
Yeah.
Monica Padman
Okay.
Dax Shepard
Yeah. I don't do them, so I don't. I don't know.
Monica Padman
All right, I'll look it up.
Dax Shepard
Okay. You want to do facts and get a haircut?
Monica Padman
Oh, yeah, I do.
Dax Shepard
Okay, great. Stay tuned for more Armchair Expert if you dare. Well, I'm just gonna start by saying this will be my first haircut I've ever given sitting down.
Monica Padman
Oh, really?
Dax Shepard
Yeah.
Monica Padman
Oh, you like to stand?
Dax Shepard
Well, if you. No one's ever cut your hair sitting you down, Right? This a crazy, huh? Yeah, but it's okay.
Monica Padman
Okay.
Dax Shepard
All right, so first I'm going to start by grooming you.
Monica Padman
Okay.
Dax Shepard
Okay. Don't forget to do the facts, though. That's also your job.
Monica Padman
For the listener, I already forgot.
Dax Shepard
Like, if you're watching, this will be fun even if you're not giving facts. But for the listener, you're going to have to give your facts.
Monica Padman
Okay. I just really like it when people brush my hair.
Dax Shepard
Yeah, I bet you probably never want the haircut to start. I can see why you want to trim. There's. Yeah, you have some strays.
Monica Padman
It's real. It's gotten really out of control.
Dax Shepard
And a lot of them are kind of mid level, so that's a little tricky.
Monica Padman
Those are the layers.
Dax Shepard
Yeah. Well, okay, we're going to start. We're going to start at the bottom.
Monica Padman
Do you want me to do anything with my head?
Dax Shepard
No.
Monica Padman
Okay, great.
Dax Shepard
Yeah.
Monica Padman
Okay. Now the facts.
Dax Shepard
Yeah, tell me about the facts.
Monica Padman
Tell me when you're making your first cut.
Dax Shepard
I already did.
Mo Amer
Wow.
Monica Padman
Were you not scared? What happened?
Dax Shepard
I just cut myself.
Monica Padman
Oh, no.
Dax Shepard
You know why? I always. I cut like this, Monica. I cut like this. And because your hair is down here, I have to cut like this. And I just cut my finger. It's okay. We're going to continue on.
Monica Padman
Oh, God.
Dax Shepard
Get me one of Your Nyx. I'm going to wrap a Nyx around this, see how absorbent it is.
Monica Padman
Okay. Okay. Are you sure you're okay?
Dax Shepard
Yeah, absolutely.
Monica Padman
Okay. Now this is from Mo.
Dax Shepard
Oh, wonderful. Mo Hammer.
Monica Padman
Mo Ammer. This was a great episode. Really interesting life.
Dax Shepard
Yeah, incredible.
Monica Padman
We've had, we've had a few people on lately with really interesting lives.
Dax Shepard
Yeah. John.
Monica Padman
John Bernthal. Mo. That's it.
Dax Shepard
That's where it's pretty much it.
Monica Padman
Okay, now I have to check myself. I said that we had someone on Armchair Anonymous who told a story about how they pooped in the aisle of a plane and it got everywhere and it got on the flight attendant.
Dax Shepard
Yeah, I didn't remember that story when you told it, did that not check out?
Monica Padman
No, it happened. But it was the flight attendant called. It was flight attendant stories.
Dax Shepard
Oh, okay. Okay, that makes more sense.
Monica Padman
Or plane stories or something. And she told it from her perspective. She's the one that got pooped on. Yeah.
Dax Shepard
As if the job's not thankless enough already.
Monica Padman
I know it's one of your main defenders. Stick up force.
Dax Shepard
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I enter, I enter the plane a little bit. Self fulfilling prophecy. I'm, I'm suspicious someone's going to try to be mean to them.
Monica Padman
Yeah. You want it to happen really?
Dax Shepard
I don't but I'm, but I'm looking for it. And you find what you're looking for. That's like the best way to sum it up.
Monica Padman
How's it it going with the haircut?
Dax Shepard
Pretty good.
Monica Padman
Okay, great.
Dax Shepard
Bleeding? Pretty good. But that's okay.
Monica Padman
Oh my God.
Dax Shepard
It's okay. It's okay.
Monica Padman
Should we put the cot at some point?
Dax Shepard
I'll put, I'll put a, a band aid on it.
Mo Amer
For sure.
Dax Shepard
It's going to get a band aid.
Monica Padman
Okay, well do we want to cauterize.
Dax Shepard
It with a chemical cauterization?
Monica Padman
Yeah, that we just learned about.
Dax Shepard
That we just learned about.
Monica Padman
That's an Easter egg farm chair Anonymous. And it's a dick.
Dax Shepard
It is a dick.
Monica Padman
Okay, we're. When do Michael Che and Colin Jost do their like swappy or they write.
Dax Shepard
Jokes for one another?
Monica Padman
Uhhuh. That happened at Christmas. They might do it more. But that was at Christmas.
Dax Shepard
Seems to be the Christmas present they give us.
Monica Padman
Yes. And then last time they did it they talked about Scarlet's vagina and caused.
Dax Shepard
A little bit of a.
Monica Padman
Caused some issues. Oh my God. Dax, hold on.
Dax Shepard
No, no, no, keep going. I just showed Monica at the blood, but it's okay. I just dabbed it and got a bunch of hair inside of it.
Monica Padman
Wait, everything's fine.
Dax Shepard
Do we want to get everything? No, everything's fine. Continue on. Nothing's happened.
Monica Padman
I'm nervous for you.
Dax Shepard
Don't be nervous.
Monica Padman
Okay.
Dax Shepard
This is not my first time bleeding.
Monica Padman
Yeah. But I caught.
Dax Shepard
I feel. I think, you know what happened. This is God smiting me for all the period talk. It's. Now he's given me a lot of blood. Well, her. Now we know God's a woman and she has smited me.
Monica Padman
You're right. It is a ding, ding, ding.
Dax Shepard
Wait, can we pause for one second? I am going to get a band because I'm going to have to pull out the layers a little bit.
Monica Padman
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
Okay, great.
Monica Padman
I might have it in my bed. Do you want me to go grab one?
Dax Shepard
Is Carly inside? She probably is. Yeah.
Monica Padman
Yeah, I'll go grab one.
Mo Amer
Okay.
Monica Padman
Be careful not to get any blood on your white shirt.
Dax Shepard
Okay, I'll try not to get blood on my wife.
Monica Padman
Are you. You so far happy with the cut?
Dax Shepard
Yeah. I mean, no. We're just. We're just.
Monica Padman
No, because we just started. Okay. Okay. Okay. Don't be up. Don't get upset. Okay. Now, why shouldn't adults get their tonsils removed? They will experience more pain and slower healing compared to children, and there's a higher chance of complications like bleeding or infection.
Dax Shepard
Okay, I am gonna have to get your hair. Your hair's gonna look crazy in this interview.
Monica Padman
Great.
Dax Shepard
Or not interview, but fact check, because I'm gonna have to flop over the. The layers over the back of your head.
Monica Padman
I don't even know what that means because, like, that's haircutting lingo.
Dax Shepard
Okay.
Monica Padman
Yes. So I still don't really understand it. Like, must be the. The size of the tonsils would be my guess.
Dax Shepard
Right. The bleeding's the issue.
Monica Padman
Yeah. There's, like, bleeding, but you'd think a kid's tonsils would lead to more bleeding.
Dax Shepard
Here's what I'm saying. You're gonna have to deal with the.
Monica Padman
Oh, do you want me to hold it?
Dax Shepard
That's okay. Let's get a little blood in there. Oh, great. Our next area.
Monica Padman
Okay. Now, when did the. The US enter the Gulf War?
Dax Shepard
January 1, 1991.
Monica Padman
January 16, 1991.
Dax Shepard
Oh, okay. God. I really thought it was, like, right.
Monica Padman
On my birthday, but I mean, close. Maybe not. Maybe they were about to, so they probably talked about it. Okay. Now, the Kuwaiti citizenship thing, I'm going.
Dax Shepard
To give your hair stylist credit. This is a complicated cut.
Monica Padman
You have it is. Oh, yeah, that's Jenny. That's why.
Dax Shepard
Oh, yeah, that makes sense.
Monica Padman
Hi. He comes in and he goes, dad cut his. Your dad cut his finger. Can we have a band?
Dax Shepard
Yeah, yeah. Give me a band aid.
Monica Padman
Like, what? And he was like, cutting Monica's.
Dax Shepard
I was like, what? What's happening now in this show?
Monica Padman
Yeah, this is, I think, what we refer to as jumping the shark.
Mo Amer
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Dax Shepard
This may be. Be the last successful episode of the show. Oh, my God.
Monica Padman
I know. He really did it. And Monica's hair's in it. Yeah, that's what I told her we should do. We want to rinse it off.
Dax Shepard
We'll do that afterwards. I just need to stop it so I can finish this haircut.
Monica Padman
Why did you let him do this? Well, I actually asked for it. You should have seen my hair. It was way too long.
Dax Shepard
Right.
Monica Padman
They're really bad.
Dax Shepard
Thank you. I love you. Hide your face.
Monica Padman
Okay, I'll do my. I can't guarantee it, but I'll try.
Dax Shepard
You know, I was telling Monica that Whiskey's a very bad man who killed 100 men.
Monica Padman
You said he's bad?
Dax Shepard
She doesn't like it.
Monica Padman
No, I just don't like. Well, as you know, I have my struggles with whiskey. Yeah, everybody does.
Mo Amer
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
Yeah. There's nothing unique about that. He's a prick, as the whole family will tell you.
Monica Padman
He's killed 150 women and he doesn't even care.
Dax Shepard
He doesn't talk about that. I think he's ashamed that he's killed that many women.
Monica Padman
Well, that's a nice way.
Dax Shepard
Yeah, like, men deserve to get killed.
Monica Padman
I took it as like, he's so proud of himself that he did that. That's just like an unspoken. Like, he doesn't even.
Dax Shepard
Like, it's tougher to kill the man.
Monica Padman
Yeah, like he doesn't even think it's a brat.
Mo Amer
Exactly. So he doesn't mention it.
Dax Shepard
I'm gonna be honest with you. Like, this is gonna be fine. And you're gonna need to see Jenny when you get home.
Monica Padman
Okay, I will. Great.
Dax Shepard
Yeah.
Monica Padman
Shout out Jenny Cho, best hairstylist alive. I'll let you guys continue. Thanks.
Dax Shepard
Thanks, love. Thanks for saving the day. The show will go on.
Monica Padman
It must. Okay, bye.
Mo Amer
Bye.
Dax Shepard
Bye, sweetie. Love you.
Monica Padman
Okay, now back to the fat. How's the blood?
Dax Shepard
Blood's done. We're all done with blood.
Monica Padman
Great. It didn't bleed through the band aid?
Dax Shepard
Nope.
Monica Padman
Great.
Dax Shepard
It's not like that penis story. I don't think I'll need a chemical Cauterization.
Monica Padman
Okay. Now, I asked AI about the Kuwaiti passports and stuff.
Dax Shepard
Okay.
Monica Padman
In citizenship, and I. It said in general, no. Being born in Kuwait does not automatically grant you Kuwait citizenship or a passport. Kuwait follows a J. Sanguinis. That means right of blood principle rather than jus soli, right of the soil. This means that citizenship is typically passed through Kuwaiti parents, not by birthplace. A child born in Kuwait to non Kuwaiti parents does not automatically qualify for Kuwaiti citizenship or a passport. Passport. There are very limited exceptions if a child is born to unknown parents or in specific cases where the father is unknown but the mother is Kuwaiti. But those are rare.
Dax Shepard
Great.
Monica Padman
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
I mean, not great. If you're born there, I feel like you should be.
Monica Padman
Oh, me, Me too. Me too.
Dax Shepard
So not great, but great.
Monica Padman
Not great, but great for the influence.
Dax Shepard
Great to find out. Yeah.
Monica Padman
Yeah. Let's see the Peabody. Do you think maybe we'll get a Peabody for this fact check?
Dax Shepard
Well, this might be the one. I mean, I bled for this episode.
Monica Padman
Yeah, you should have. And. Yeah, and so did I.
Dax Shepard
Quite a bit of blood.
Mo Amer
Oh, yeah.
Dax Shepard
We're both bleeding. Rob, you got any blood back there?
Monica Padman
Not yet. Okay. The George Foster Peabody Awards, or simply Peabody Awards, or the Peabody, named for the American businessman and philanthropist George Peabody honor what are described as the most powerful, enlightening and invigorating stories in all of television, television, radio and online media. Because of their academic affiliation and reputation for discernment, the awards are held in high esteem with the media industry. And as I told you, they are presented by the Grady College of Journalism and Mass Communications at the University of Georgia. Ding, ding, ding, dingoes. And we still don't have one, even though that's the case, which is pretty.
Dax Shepard
Upsetting, doubly embarrassing for us. We should have home court advantage and still no Peabody.
Monica Padman
And they. When you're in college there and you're part of the journalism school, which technically I was, because my PR degree was with Grady, you could apply and basically audition, slash try out to be one of their, like, student judges. And I did that, and I did not get chosen.
Dax Shepard
You could have been a voice in the Peabody's.
Monica Padman
Correct.
Dax Shepard
Oh, wow.
Monica Padman
Anthony got picked.
Dax Shepard
Oh, God, he is. I'm impressed you're friends with him.
Monica Padman
Yeah. It speaks to my.
Dax Shepard
He kind of blows you away in a lot of these competitive situations. And you still love him because he just killed you at Major Dawn Mahjong.
Monica Padman
Yes, he did. He did. He won like three out of three games. Yeah, I guess that's true. Friendship.
Dax Shepard
It is, it is. That's how I felt about Aaron. Like, Aaron was just so much physically superior to me and everyone. Everything boy related as a kid, his coordination and his athleticism was off the charts. Like, we both tried out for the basketball team in seventh grade and I didn't make it. And he didn't even want to do it. And he made it and then he just didn't play.
Monica Padman
Sure. Oh, that reminds me of an even worse thing that happened with Anthony. No, with Cali. So when I lived in.
Dax Shepard
Oh, I remember this story somehow, I think.
Monica Padman
What was it when I lived in Atlanta after college and I had an agent and was trying to. To work in Atlanta before I moved to la. You know, the auditions that come through aren't that frequent.
Dax Shepard
Right.
Monica Padman
So it feels like there's a lot of pressure on them. There was a commercial audition for. I don't remember. It was a fast food brand company and. And they basically said, like, bring a friend to the audience audition because you needed to, like, be interacting with someone in it.
Dax Shepard
Huh.
Monica Padman
And she booked it.
Dax Shepard
And she didn't want to be there.
Monica Padman
No, she. She wasn't there to act. She was there to just be there with me and do this thing. And then she booked it. I'm pretty sure I did cry about that.
Dax Shepard
You did?
Monica Padman
Yeah, I think so.
Dax Shepard
Oh, but you guys made it.
Monica Padman
Oh, yeah. I didn't blame her. Even then. I didn't blame her. But. But I was like, man, I suck.
Dax Shepard
Yeah. Non actor beat me.
Monica Padman
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
Oh, yeah, that's. That's rough.
Monica Padman
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
I'm sorry that happened.
Monica Padman
Thank you. You just got to stick with it, you know?
Dax Shepard
Yeah. War of attrition. Well, we've cleaned up the back.
Monica Padman
Okay.
Dax Shepard
Yeah. I mean, again, Jenny is. She's going to need to come in here, but let me just do it. I'm just going. I'm going to flit around a little bit.
Monica Padman
Okay. Yeah. Because you said you like to be playful.
Dax Shepard
Yeah.
Monica Padman
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
And I'm gonna try to clean up just some of these strays.
Monica Padman
Okay.
Dax Shepard
I'm gonna tell you right now, you are free of gray hair, which. That's nice.
Monica Padman
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
Good for you.
Monica Padman
Did you pull any out?
Dax Shepard
No.
Monica Padman
You didn't see any. That's good.
Dax Shepard
No, I mean, there's some that are like a slightly different color. Right. But they're not. They're not gray. I don't know how to do this, but let me just take a look at the side here a little bit. We did not not touch the sides, which conventionally you want to Cut the whole hair.
Monica Padman
Oh, is that normal?
Dax Shepard
That's what I've been told.
Monica Padman
Okay. Are you regretful right now that you didn't take this opportunity to shave one side of my hair? Stop.
Dax Shepard
I can't believe you guessed this. I brought this down in my pocket. I was like, is she gonna see this thing hanging out of my pocket? This whole thing was leading up. No, this whole thing was leading up to freaking you out and just going.
Monica Padman
It really feels like you're doing it. Stop, stop, stop. Did you get some?
Dax Shepard
No.
Mo Amer
Oh, my God.
Dax Shepard
Okay, well, it looks a little healthier back here.
Monica Padman
This part I'm holding.
Dax Shepard
I already did that. That's why you were holding it.
Mo Amer
Oh.
Monica Padman
Phew. Okay, so it's done.
Dax Shepard
Yeah. I mean, I should probably just quickly look over here. I didn't look anywhere over here. Let me just quickly see what we got over here. What if I fucking shave the side here?
Mo Amer
And you are so mad.
Monica Padman
Yeah.
Dax Shepard
And then you looked in the mirror and you were like, I look awesome.
Monica Padman
I mean, this was your opportunity.
Dax Shepard
There'll be others. You're cheap. No, you're not even cheap. You're lazy.
Monica Padman
I've been trying to coordinate with Jenny for, like, a month. Oh, my gosh.
Dax Shepard
Okay. All right.
Monica Padman
It's.
Dax Shepard
It's a little better.
Monica Padman
It's definitely less straggly.
Dax Shepard
Yeah, yeah, yeah, it was. It was a little wispy. It was a little too wispy.
Monica Padman
Yeah. Nice. How do I look?
Dax Shepard
That's an improvement. Yeah, yeah, it's better. Okay, again, you need to see Jen.
Monica Padman
Rob, what do you think?
Mo Amer
Yeah, it looks good.
Monica Padman
Okay, great. That looks gorgeous. All right, well, that was great.
Dax Shepard
All right, Rob, sit down. That I could actually do a good job.
Monica Padman
I think you did a good job.
Dax Shepard
I did a fair job. You have way less split ends.
Monica Padman
Great. All right, that's it.
Mo Amer
Love you.
Monica Padman
Love you.
Dax Shepard
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Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard: Episode Featuring Mo Amer Released on May 12, 2025
In this heartfelt and engaging episode of Armchair Expert, host Dax Shepard is joined by his co-host Monica Padman to welcome Mo Amer, a Palestinian stand-up comedian and award-winning writer. Dax expresses his admiration for Mo, highlighting his appearances on shows like Ramy and his own Netflix specials, The Vagabond and Mohammed in Texas. Mo is currently on his "El Oso Palestino" (The Palestinian Bear) tour, blending his comedic talents with his cultural heritage.
Mo shares his upbringing in Kuwait, providing listeners with a glimpse into his family's life before the Gulf War. Born to Palestinian parents, his father was a telecommunications engineer who played a pivotal role in establishing one of Kuwait's first radio stations.
Notable Quote:
Mo Amer [21:04]: "My father built one of the first radio stations in Kuwait. He was instrumental in creating wireless communication between oil rigs."
Mo recounts the harrowing experience of the Iraqi invasion of Kuwait in 1990. At just nine years old, he witnessed his family's home being ransacked and his father being kidnapped. This traumatic event forced his mother to make the difficult decision to send Mo and his sister to the United States for safety.
Notable Quote:
Mo Amer [24:52]: "They were threatening to throw a grenade in our bedroom. It was chaos, and everything changed overnight."
Relocating to Houston, Texas, Mo and his sister navigated life as immigrants without Kuwaiti citizenship. He discusses the complexities of being stateless and the challenges that come with waiting for asylum, including the inability to work legally until obtaining a Social Security card.
Notable Quote:
Mo Amer [46:00]: "I took 20 years before I got citizenship. But when I turned 18, I was able to get a Social Security card. Before that, I couldn't work legally."
Mo delves into the responsibilities that come with being a successful Palestinian in America. He feels the weight of representing his community and addressing complex political issues through his comedy, striving to balance humor with meaningful commentary.
Notable Quote:
Dax Shepard [07:22]: "If you want to be political, great, but having to inherit that on top of everything else seems like a weird reward."
Mo's journey into stand-up comedy began in high school, where his English teachers recognized his comedic talent and encouraged him to perform. This encouragement led him to pursue comedy seriously, eventually headlining shows and touring internationally, even performing for military audiences in various countries.
Notable Quote:
Mo Amer [50:03]: "By the time I was 19, I was already headlining shows and traveling overseas without a passport."
Mo discusses the creation of his TV show, which intertwines his personal experiences with comedy and drama. He reflects on the emotional toll of reenacting his family's experiences during the Gulf War and the impact of integrating real-life footage into his narrative.
Notable Quote:
Mo Amer [60:02]: "I feel like this second season is a masterpiece. Episode seven is something so unique — tender, thoughtful, sweet, heartfelt, and funny."
A particularly moving moment in the episode is when Mo discovers old family footage, including a camcorder his father used to film family moments in Kuwait. Viewing this footage brings back powerful emotions and a deeper understanding of his family's resilience.
Notable Quote:
Mo Amer [68:27]: "I caught footage of me as a little kid in our house in Kuwait. It was insane to get footage from my dad that I didn't know existed anymore."
Mo expresses pride in his show's accolades, including its perfect rating on Rotten Tomatoes and recognition from prestigious bodies like the Peabody Awards. He shares his hope that his storytelling will continue to shed light on Palestinian experiences and promote understanding.
Notable Quote:
Mo Amer [73:45]: "The balance was perfect, and it let us take people on this ride and let the story do the talking."
As the episode winds down, Mo reflects on the importance of storytelling in comedy and the ongoing challenges artists like himself face in balancing humor with advocacy. Dax and Monica commend Mo for his candidness and the depth he brings to his work.
This episode of Armchair Expert masterfully blends comedy with poignant storytelling, offering listeners an intimate look into Mo Amer's life as a Palestinian immigrant navigating the complexities of identity, representation, and personal trauma. Mo's candid conversations provide both laughter and profound insights, celebrating resilience and the human spirit.