Mo Amer

Summary

Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard: Episode Featuring Mo Amer Released on May 12, 2025

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Introduction to Mo Amer

In this heartfelt and engaging episode of Armchair Expert, host Dax Shepard is joined by his co-host Monica Padman to welcome Mo Amer, a Palestinian stand-up comedian and award-winning writer. Dax expresses his admiration for Mo, highlighting his appearances on shows like Ramy and his own Netflix specials, The Vagabond and Mohammed in Texas. Mo is currently on his "El Oso Palestino" (The Palestinian Bear) tour, blending his comedic talents with his cultural heritage.

Mo Amer's Early Life in Kuwait

Mo shares his upbringing in Kuwait, providing listeners with a glimpse into his family's life before the Gulf War. Born to Palestinian parents, his father was a telecommunications engineer who played a pivotal role in establishing one of Kuwait's first radio stations.

Notable Quote:

Mo Amer [21:04]: "My father built one of the first radio stations in Kuwait. He was instrumental in creating wireless communication between oil rigs."

The Gulf War and Its Impact on Mo's Family

Mo recounts the harrowing experience of the Iraqi invasion of Kuwait in 1990. At just nine years old, he witnessed his family's home being ransacked and his father being kidnapped. This traumatic event forced his mother to make the difficult decision to send Mo and his sister to the United States for safety.

Notable Quote:

Mo Amer [24:52]: "They were threatening to throw a grenade in our bedroom. It was chaos, and everything changed overnight."

Immigration to the United States and Challenges Faced

Relocating to Houston, Texas, Mo and his sister navigated life as immigrants without Kuwaiti citizenship. He discusses the complexities of being stateless and the challenges that come with waiting for asylum, including the inability to work legally until obtaining a Social Security card.

Notable Quote:

Mo Amer [46:00]: "I took 20 years before I got citizenship. But when I turned 18, I was able to get a Social Security card. Before that, I couldn't work legally."

The Burden of Representation

Mo delves into the responsibilities that come with being a successful Palestinian in America. He feels the weight of representing his community and addressing complex political issues through his comedy, striving to balance humor with meaningful commentary.

Notable Quote:

Dax Shepard [07:22]: "If you want to be political, great, but having to inherit that on top of everything else seems like a weird reward."

Mo Amer's Comedy Career and Breakthroughs

Mo's journey into stand-up comedy began in high school, where his English teachers recognized his comedic talent and encouraged him to perform. This encouragement led him to pursue comedy seriously, eventually headlining shows and touring internationally, even performing for military audiences in various countries.

Notable Quote:

Mo Amer [50:03]: "By the time I was 19, I was already headlining shows and traveling overseas without a passport."

Behind the Scenes of Mo Amer's TV Show

Mo discusses the creation of his TV show, which intertwines his personal experiences with comedy and drama. He reflects on the emotional toll of reenacting his family's experiences during the Gulf War and the impact of integrating real-life footage into his narrative.

Notable Quote:

Mo Amer [60:02]: "I feel like this second season is a masterpiece. Episode seven is something so unique — tender, thoughtful, sweet, heartfelt, and funny."

Emotional Reflections and Discoveries

A particularly moving moment in the episode is when Mo discovers old family footage, including a camcorder his father used to film family moments in Kuwait. Viewing this footage brings back powerful emotions and a deeper understanding of his family's resilience.

Notable Quote:

Mo Amer [68:27]: "I caught footage of me as a little kid in our house in Kuwait. It was insane to get footage from my dad that I didn't know existed anymore."

Recognition and Awards

Mo expresses pride in his show's accolades, including its perfect rating on Rotten Tomatoes and recognition from prestigious bodies like the Peabody Awards. He shares his hope that his storytelling will continue to shed light on Palestinian experiences and promote understanding.

Notable Quote:

Mo Amer [73:45]: "The balance was perfect, and it let us take people on this ride and let the story do the talking."

Closing Remarks

As the episode winds down, Mo reflects on the importance of storytelling in comedy and the ongoing challenges artists like himself face in balancing humor with advocacy. Dax and Monica commend Mo for his candidness and the depth he brings to his work.

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Highlighted Quotes with Timestamps

• Mo Amer [21:04]: "My father built one of the first radio stations in Kuwait. He was instrumental in creating wireless communication between oil rigs."
• Mo Amer [24:52]: "They were threatening to throw a grenade in our bedroom. It was chaos, and everything changed overnight."
• Mo Amer [46:00]: "I took 20 years before I got citizenship. But when I turned 18, I was able to get a Social Security card. Before that, I couldn't work legally."
• Dax Shepard [07:22]: "If you want to be political, great, but having to inherit that on top of everything else seems like a weird reward."
• Mo Amer [50:03]: "By the time I was 19, I was already headlining shows and traveling overseas without a passport."
• Mo Amer [60:02]: "I feel like this second season is a masterpiece. Episode seven is something so unique — tender, thoughtful, sweet, heartfelt, and funny."
• Mo Amer [68:27]: "I caught footage of me as a little kid in our house in Kuwait. It was insane to get footage from my dad that I didn't know existed anymore."
• Mo Amer [73:45]: "The balance was perfect, and it let us take people on this ride and let the story do the talking."

Conclusion

This episode of Armchair Expert masterfully blends comedy with poignant storytelling, offering listeners an intimate look into Mo Amer's life as a Palestinian immigrant navigating the complexities of identity, representation, and personal trauma. Mo's candid conversations provide both laughter and profound insights, celebrating resilience and the human spirit.

Transcript

[Dax Shepard]

Wondry plus subscribers can listen to Armchair Expert early and ad free right now. Join Wondry plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts or you can listen for free wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome, welcome, welcome to Armchair Expert. I'm Dax Shepard and I'm joined by Monica Padman.

[Monica Padman]

Hi.

[Dax Shepard]

Today we have Mo Amer on. Yeah, I'm a big fan of Mo.

[Monica Padman]

Mo is great.

[Dax Shepard]

Mo is a stand up comedian and an award winning writer. I first saw him on Rami, which is another show I Friend of the Pod where he plays Mo in that but not our Mo in Mo.

[Monica Padman]

Mo plays Mo in that but then in his show he's a different. He's a different Mo.

[Dax Shepard]

He's a different Mo, but very similar. Also Black Adam and two standup specials on Netflix. Mo Amer, the vagabond and Mohammed in Texas and he's on tour right now with El Oso Palestino tour, which is the Palestinian bear. Yeah, that's what that translates to.

[Monica Padman]

This was so interesting.

[Dax Shepard]

Another incredible story. We're just coming off of John's story and then now we have this.

[Monica Padman]

We're getting some epic tales in this.

[Dax Shepard]

Garage are also very kean.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, I was thinking a lot about key during this episode.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, we're accumulating some wild. You can really take some circuitous paths to this town of Hollywood.

[Monica Padman]

That's right.

[Dax Shepard]

Please enjoy Mo Amer. We are supported by Britbox. There are some incredible shows coming out of the UK right now. The clever writing, the picturesque settings, the witty dialogue, they just do TV differently across the pond in the best way. And you know, they're the masters of charming mysteries set in quaint little villages where three people die a week. Not only do they have a huge selection of classics like Pride and Prejudice, but their new original shows are insanely good too. Especially Ludwig with David Mitchell from Peepshow. He play the introverted puzzle maker guy who accidentally becomes a detective and solves murders like they're crosswords. It's twisty and clever and an absolute treat to watch. So if you want to mix it up and see things differently, try Britbox and stream the best British TV. Go to Britbox.com and start a free trial. Today we are supported by Squarespace and boy, do we have a gorgeous website. I implore everyone to check out. We made it on Squarespace. And when I say we, I mean Rob. He did a beautiful job and it was very easy for him to do. So no matter what kind of website you to build, Squarespace is the perfect partner to get it launched quickly and easily and their design templates are going to make your site look incredible too. If you're trying to do some good this year, you can use Squarespace to set up a fundraising site. Let's say you wanted to raise money for first responders or families impacted by the recent fires here in la. You can fundraise directly on your Squarespace website and grow your impact with built in donation tools. Create a professional on brand site that makes it easy to accept one time or recurring contributions and engage supporters. With built in email campaigns and marketing marketing tools you can connect with your community and inspire more people to support your cause. They're making it easier for you to make a difference. Another reason Squarespace is a company we're proud to be partnered with. Check out squarespace.com for a free trial and when you're ready to launch, use offer code DAX to save 10 off your first purchase of a website or domain. That's squarespace.com and promo code DAX to get started today. He's an opt do you get anxiety before you go out on a talk show that you're gonna have to pee once you get out there?

[Mo Amer]

Peeing is not the anxiety.

[Dax Shepard]

It's not.

[Monica Padman]

That's last on the list.

[Dax Shepard]

What is it?

[Mo Amer]

I just watched you and Seth. Actually, I have something in common with Seth. Edibles. Fuck me up. Like I'm terrified of that. I don't really get anxiety. I get anxiety only if something is not settled at home. You know, if something is off, you'll carry that. I'm a very sensitive person. I can feel my family's energy. If something's wrong, I'll know it's wrong, right? I don't know how to describe it. It's like the antenna. Spidey says that's the only time.

[Dax Shepard]

No compulsive rumination thoughts like I can acknowledge the pee one is insane. I'll be in the dressing room at Kimmel and I'm waiting to hear the knock. I stand in front of the toilet and then when I hear the knock I go one second and then I do my last pee. Cause I'm so nervous that it's 12 minutes.

[Monica Padman]

Do you think you're at risk of ever peeing in your pants?

[Dax Shepard]

No. Although if ever there was a place to try it, it would be on Camel.

[Mo Amer]

Kimmel's the one to do it. Yeah, for sure.

[Dax Shepard]

It's a safe place to pee or suit.

[Mo Amer]

So easy to talk to. It feels so calming. I'm doing Kimmel tomorrow. Actually, I Don't know if you knew that or just.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm doing it Thursday.

[Mo Amer]

Oh, that's funny. It's awesome.

[Dax Shepard]

Let's do it on the same.

[Mo Amer]

Let's do it.

[Dax Shepard]

I'll go to yours, you come to mine.

[Monica Padman]

Why don't you guys tell me the same story? We'll plan it.

[Dax Shepard]

It's going to be great for him.

[Mo Amer]

Because he's you on the show. As an Arab growing up in America, it'd be so great.

[Dax Shepard]

That's kind of what they do on Weekend Update. Do you ever watch the stuff with Shay?

[Mo Amer]

Fuck Shay, man. No, I'm just kidding. That's my brother. That's my brother. It's gonna be downhill from here, guys.

[Dax Shepard]

But him and Colin.

[Mo Amer]

No, these are my guys. They're my friends.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Where they write jokes for each other that they're not allowed to tell and.

[Monica Padman]

They have to read out loud on Christmas.

[Mo Amer]

I think whatever the last show is, they do that.

[Monica Padman]

That's fine.

[Mo Amer]

It's diabolical. It is.

[Monica Padman]

You know, it's scary.

[Dax Shepard]

And much higher risk for Colin, I would say.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah, definitely. Especially Caus was really trying to get him into trouble. He's genuinely trying to put him in the worst possible pickle.

[Dax Shepard]

But in a weird way, I'm like, they're geniuses. They've hacked the math of this. And really, we are dying to see this white guy make a terrible joke. Cause we know the risk is career ending. And they figured out how to do it.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah, they have no. It's true.

[Monica Padman]

But there's no blame.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Like the whole thing's.

[Mo Amer]

The black guy wrote it.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, exactly. Exactly. I didn't come up with that.

[Mo Amer]

I didn't mean to say the N word. He told me to say it.

[Monica Padman]

He made me say it.

[Mo Amer]

I have to do it. It. It's written. I read everything that's on the Monk.

[Monica Padman]

To not do it.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah, I agree. You know what gives me not anxiety, but the thing that causes me to go down, like a thought process. Especially since this is specifically about the show and there's so much to discuss within the series itself.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Mo Amer]

It's like, what clip do you show? What exactly do you talk about? And I'm a standup as well. It's like, I just want to do jokes. I just want to be a guy on a couch. But I'm in this extraordinary position where I'm the only Palestinian on television with his own show created by a Palestinian, starring and directed by. It's like, what are you going to do? What are you going to say? Everybody's like, come.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, we all want to hear, work this out for us.

[Mo Amer]

Exactly, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Tell us what to do.

[Mo Amer]

I really just want to be a comedian. That'd be really great to do that. But I understand that there's an immense responsibility that comes with my position and you can't just be a clown all the time.

[Dax Shepard]

I have said this a bunch in the past, which is for the young black dude who's from a shit situation and makes it out and becomes successful. It wasn't bad enough that he had to go through all of that and be extra special to get here, but now he's also burdened with the responsibility of representing the black community and speaking out on all issues. And I just have always felt like if you want to be political, great, but just to have to inherit that on top of everything else, it seems like a weird reward.

[Mo Amer]

No, I agree.

[Dax Shepard]

And I would be resentful a bit if I were in a position where it's like, no, no, I want to tell jokes and have fun and I'm entitled to do that as much as anyone else is. So does it feel like a burden at all?

[Mo Amer]

It definitely doesn't feel like a burden. It's funny. That book says the burden and the glory.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, my God.

[Mo Amer]

Exactly right.

[Dax Shepard]

That says it all.

[Mo Amer]

W such I really do feel standup itself is an art form since that's how I started out technically. I did theater in high school and I was doing standup at the same time. And once I started educating myself on what standup comedy is and the history of standup, historically speaking, the greatest standup comedians have always made you laugh and made you think, yes, of course, there's like the Dangerfield who's just silly and amazing one liners and that's incredible. One of the funniest guys ever, really. But if you look at it, everybody's top five is someone who really made you think.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, who's your top five? Can we agree on number one?

[Mo Amer]

Yeah, for sure. It's close. I don't like to put them in any particular order because they each have a fascinating skill set that the other one can't do. Like Prior and Carlin. Carlin has a particular skill set. His ahead of the game in the most incredible way where everything he says today is relevant, but he has a certain structure. He has to write every single thing down. And you have Prior, which is really freewheeling, which is my style, really. I write everything on the fly. I have to do it in front of the audience. I can't sit down and just write it out. I'm inspired by the audience. I need that. So I appreciate those skill sets. So I really don't like to put them in a particular order, but these are the comedians I truly admire and love so much.

[Dax Shepard]

A good analogy would kind of be like you're asking, who's your favorite athlete as opposed to who's your favorite basketball player, favorite hockey player. Prior's doing something different than Jerry Seinfeld, than Cosby was sitting down and doing this.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, Chappelle. Do you like Chappelle?

[Mo Amer]

Of course, yeah. We've done thousands of shows together. Pryor, Carlin. Bill Hicks to me is up there, unfortunately died so young, but he was on that trajectory of being truly ahead of his time and magnificent in his own way. Chappelle is on my top five just because I've seen him personally. Thousands of shows together, it's like seeing inside of how a Rolex works, like how the mechanism all flows. It's just really fascinating to see that. And I feel like we're very similar in ways. A lot of things overlap between us, and I'm just grateful to have one of the greatest of all time and to be able to see him. And he's my brother, he's my mentor, but also like family. So he's up there. Of course. I don't think there's a debate there then. The fifth is really hard. It's like Eddie Murphy, but he stopped. He got so famous. Once you stop doing stand up and want to come back to it, it's almost impossible.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, it's very impressive that Seinfeld was able to come back and do a.

[Mo Amer]

Real show, but he never really stopped doing stand up. He always would show up in his show was Stand Up. Murphy became a movie stuff, rock and roll, man.

[Dax Shepard]

A lot of young people wouldn't even know he was a stand up.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah, exactly. But those are the albums I used to listen to. But when I first started Stand Up, I was only been in the country like five years, so I didn't really know anything about the history of stand up. I would be at open mics and be like, oh, you sound like Kenison. I'm like, who the fuck's Kenison? They're like, who the fuck's Kenison? You live in Houston. People thought I was full of shit because I didn't have an accent. To them, they feel like, oh, if you're an immigrant, you should have some kind of accent. The fact that you don't is baffling. So we don't really believe it.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Mo Amer]

Like I would tell my friends when they found out, because you don't talk about it. You just walk around like, hey, I don't have citizenship yet.

[Dax Shepard]

You're trying to fit in, not stand out more.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah, but it never really comes up. You just want to ball in the neighborhood, have a good time. You're not really thinking about it. It's not like we're going to go travel to Europe together. Yeah, they know the family, but you're too young, you're too naive, you're thinking about too many other things. Tend to share your immigration status. It just didn't really come up at that time.

[Dax Shepard]

Now, this is linked to the obligation to talk about being Palestinian in this moment. But also, do you get sick of having to tell your story? Because your show, which we're going to talk a lot about, is your story. So you inevitably do have to share it again. Back to the I just want to be funny. I don't want to have to tell this fucking story again.

[Mo Amer]

There's some fatigue for sure, but it's mostly not coming from sharing the story because I am introducing different eras of it, and there is so many layers that are baked into each experience. Whether it is the Gulf War, growing up in America, there's really fun ways and interesting ways to explore that. As a storyteller, I am really intrigued by that, and I want to dive into it and capture all the subtleties and bring them out. That is the best part of writing the TV show and creating a show that is really emotional at times. I can't explain to you how many moments in the series while I was filming, especially season two, where I would have to go off and just weep and then come back and then start over and then direct. Okay, guys, so what we're going to do is, you know, process. Co star's like, how the fuck are you doing this? I saw what happened. I saw it.

[Dax Shepard]

You were in the corner crying.

[Mo Amer]

Shut your mouth.

[Dax Shepard]

You weren't getting anything from craft service. You were whimpering to yourself in front of it.

[Mo Amer]

That's. That's fun. I really do enjoy that. Whether it's super emotional or just straight up comedic scene that we're shooting and you're just feeding lines to Hamid, which is one of my favorite characters in the whole season. The thing that I have happening to me right now, especially on tour, is all the people sharing their experiences with me.

[Monica Padman]

Sure, yeah. You have to hold a lot, and.

[Mo Amer]

That'S a massive thing. That's the most difficult part. May have people Coming up to me talking about they lost 200 family members. I held a kid yesterday, he's three years old, he's from Gaza, he's getting treatment here. He's lost his mother. And I'm like holding him and I'm like, yeah, you know, just thinking about him. I just had a son, he's 17 months. I can't even imagine it. Yeah, that's the stuff that's really, really, really heavy. And that's where the responsibility comes. But literally there's nobody else speaking about it from an actual Palestinian perspective.

[Dax Shepard]

Right. I hear a lot of young white, liberal kids telling me about it.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah, well, it's good. People should engage in this conversation. That's the only way to truly have any kind of progress is engage in these talks. But no one is coming from my background talking about it at. No one has the voice that I do or the platform that I do. So just to engage in that. And it's also a massive test for me as a comedian because I could always go up and just give me a topic, dissect this, have a blast with it, make it funny, no problem. But to toe that line is dangerous.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, that's what Chappelle's so masterful at. And yeah, I need his perspective on black experience. The insight that he has repeatedly given me is just incredibly valuable and so authentic and from the ins that I always appreciate that.

[Mo Amer]

Can't agree with you more.

[Dax Shepard]

To start, you were born in Kuwait.

[Mo Amer]

I was, yep.

[Dax Shepard]

I got food poisoning in the Kuwait first class lounge.

[Mo Amer]

Oh, no.

[Dax Shepard]

And then had food poisoning for 28 hours of flight back.

[Mo Amer]

That's not funny.

[Dax Shepard]

No, it's really funny. Can you think of a worse scenario than food poisoning setting on as they close the door for your 14 hour flight?

[Mo Amer]

That's horrible. I had a similar situation. Did not last 28 hours. That is misery. Had a similar situation from Sweden to Frankfurt. Catching my connection flight in Frankfurt. Before I boarded the flight I bought, I thought it was just a regular sparkling water. So I take a drink of it. I was like, oh my God, this tastes God awful. It's pear fucking pear sparkling water. I'm like, God damn you, Swedish people. Like, who drinks pear sparkling water? And whatever formula it takes to make the pear taste that flavor, that perfume just created the worst possible bubbling sickness. The storm hurricane was forming. Blood was leaving my head and going right to try to rescue my gut. I either needed to pass gas or take a poop. I wasn't sure about what was going to happen. I feel fainting. Yeah. You can't sit there on the plane.

[Dax Shepard]

Horrible. Sweaty Brow Ridge.

[Mo Amer]

Sweaty Brow Ridge. A full blown waterfall situation from every area possible. The back of the dome. The front of the dome.

[Dax Shepard]

I would say you now look like someone that's smuggling something on an airplane.

[Mo Amer]

I shoved cocaine up my ass and now it's backfiring. That's what it looks like. I finally hear the ding to get up. I was like, I got to go to the restroom. We got to figure this out. I felt really faint and right before I grabbed the door, I just go down. Perfect, right? Oh no.

[Dax Shepard]

You collapsed.

[Mo Amer]

I just fainted. And I wake up to three of the hottest Swedish German.

[Dax Shepard]

It's like a beer party.

[Mo Amer]

They're like, are you okay? What's happening? Have you been partying? What's going on?

[Dax Shepard]

Were you at the beer garden and had so much fun? You want to have some more fun?

[Mo Amer]

I was like, no, I wasn't. Leave me alone. Are you diabetic? I was like, no, I'm not diabetic. Thank God. I'm not diabetic. Stop making me panic even more. Just leave me air. It was horrible. I just needed to pass gas. That's all I needed. Just pass gas. And it was all gone.

[Dax Shepard]

Wow. My first thought upon waking up and seeing the Swedish ski team would be are my pants full? Cuz we don't know what happened. We don't know what happened while I was out.

[Mo Amer]

Oh yeah, true.

[Dax Shepard]

And these are very beautiful women. I might have a full cargo.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, we had a armchair on. Tell a story about that. Where he pooped in the lane.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

In the aisle. And all these beautiful flight attendants were there. And there's poop on them now.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh no.

[Mo Amer]

Are you serious?

[Dax Shepard]

Yes. You just have to tell yourself in those situations.

[Mo Amer]

Horrible.

[Monica Padman]

I know.

[Mo Amer]

They jumped off the fucking plane. Just hear the pilot. Yeah. He just jumped out of the back of the fucking plane.

[Dax Shepard]

He's got three rain slickers tied together. Hopefully that's pedal.

[Mo Amer]

I'm such a shy person. I don't even like taking off my shirt in front of people. No, I can't do it. I do it. I got the pool and stuff. Right. I can't imagine a scenario where I my pants on a plane as everybody and they're all looking at you.

[Dax Shepard]

We'll just say, ideally, if that happens, you want to wake up and see three ugly old men.

[Mo Amer]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

You're like, yeah, guys. I myself, you know what it's like?

[Mo Amer]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm disgusting. Like you guys.

[Mo Amer]

Smoking a cigarette with on his fingertips like you don't care. Yeah, I remember. 62. Nam was worse.

[Dax Shepard]

I myself an hour ago. Welcome.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, so dad is a telecoms engineer.

[Mo Amer]

Great segue.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. We're going back to Kuwait. Sharp.

[Mo Amer]

Let's bring up your deceased brother.

[Dax Shepard]

After all, you lost your mother in 1990.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, we'll knock on wood for that one.

[Dax Shepard]

Straight into that, yeah.

[Mo Amer]

My father was a telecommunications engineer.

[Dax Shepard]

And was Kuwait the first stop when they left Palestine?

[Mo Amer]

When my mom and dad married. Prior to that, my father got his telecommunications engineer in England. The first job offer was actually in Doha in Qatar in the 60s. So he lived there for like a year. That's the reason why they left. This is a job. Just like if you're in Houston and you get a job in Kansas, or if you're in la, you get a gig, you gotta go film in Toronto. Same thing. So he was in Doha, and then he got a job in Kuwait, and that was where my family settled and we were all born there. He worked for the Kuwaiti oil company. He built one of the first radio stations in Kuwait. He was instrumental in creating wireless communication at that time between oil rigs. He was a really brilliant dude. Truly ahead of his time. My mom would always tell me, like, oh, he had a cell phone in the 60s. That big thing that you put on your shoulder and it's a massive bo.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, Microwave.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah, he was that guy. He always had to have the top tech whenever it comes out.

[Dax Shepard]

You guys left when you were nine. But how long had they been there?

[Mo Amer]

Oh, since the 60s. 25, maybe 30 years there. And they would go back and forth to west bank, where my family lives and grandparents are.

[Dax Shepard]

And did they come to love it when you guys did leave? Did mom miss it?

[Mo Amer]

It was more than just loving Kuwait. It was more the normalcy of the life that we had there as a great life. My uncle and my cousins lived three houses down. All my aunts. Everybody settled in Kuwait, and we had a lot of family there, and my grandparents and some of my aunts. Of course, a lot of the extended family was still in the West Bank. But we had this real unification where we would see each other every weekend. There's a barbecue every weekend. All my uncles are talking smack and playing all these different games. And whoever loses has to buy the dessert.

[Dax Shepard]

Was your dad gregarious and loud?

[Mo Amer]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Are you more mom or Dad?

[Mo Amer]

I guess I'm a really solid mix of both. I have the exploratory like my dad had. He really wanted to figure out what was going on. He would really Travel a lot and want to see the world. So curious in that way. And my mother was very funny, poetic. She still to this day writes poetry and that's her life. She wakes up in the morning, she's inspired by something she writes. It sometimes is super sad, but thoughtful and sweet. Sometimes it's funny. I feel like I have a great mix of both, but my dad was really outgoing. He was the first guy on the dance floor, get everybody going. And he was that guy for sure.

[Dax Shepard]

I have a ton of memories of 4, 9. Do you remember living there?

[Mo Amer]

Everything. But we also come from the Sham region, which is basically Santa Barbara. It's so gorgeous. The weather is stunning. There's not really any desertous regions unless you go super south or you hit the Jordan Valley. That's where it becomes that way. And there's Bedouins there. Of course, there's tons of sheep herders. We do come from a farming culture. Originally.

[Monica Padman]

Santa Barbara seems to be the place. When my parents first came to visit here, we went to Santa Barbara on a day trip and they were like, this reminds me of India. I was like, what? And then we had a few other people from other places say like, Santa Barbara's kind of like this person.

[Dax Shepard]

As it turns out.

[Mo Amer]

Turns out it's not really suited for that kind of living, to be honest. You don't go to explore the desert there, but surely in Kuwait we did that. I mean, I used to ride the bicycle as kids, set up mounds and we just dive off of them. And you just bounce off of that shit and just keep going. Yeah, yeah. Just ruthless. I would hop on the back of dirt bikes and fall off going 40 miles an hour. But you're eight, you're just like rubber band, doesn't even matter.

[Dax Shepard]

You went to a British speaking school?

[Mo Amer]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

What kind of classmates did you have?

[Mo Amer]

People from all over the world. Bunch of expats lived in the neighborhood we resided in since my father worked for the Kweidi oil company. This is a compound situation. That neighborhood north and south is where we lived in. Ahmadi had so many families. Super, super diverse. You talking about British, Pakistani, Swiss, everybody lived in that neighborhood.

[Dax Shepard]

And most of the people in that neighborhood working for the oil company.

[Mo Amer]

Exactly. Everybody had a different job within the company itself. Like Aramco company. You go overse. That's the biggest oil company in the world, number one. But it's like driving onto military base. Oh, right, right. Our neighborhood. At the end of it there was like the hospitality palace. So anybody that visited there would be presidents that would visit, they would put them up there.

[Dax Shepard]

I would ride by on my bike if I was a kid and try to see who was staying in the.

[Mo Amer]

Palace all the time. Would you? Yeah, all the time.

[Dax Shepard]

So curious, like, is Michael Jackson going to come out?

[Mo Amer]

Oh, no, we're all over it. We see cars come in. We immediately just pedal over there and talk to the security guy in the front.

[Dax Shepard]

Try to figure out who this wealthy man is.

[Mo Amer]

He's like, trust me, you don't want know. Michael Jackson, President of Malaysia or something like that. Ah, okay, let us know.

[Dax Shepard]

Salt in the brunai.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah, Michael Jackson. We used to mimic him. He was the thing back then for sure.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh God.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

So Gulf War breaks out in 91, August of 90.

[Mo Amer]

The reason why I remember exactly the Iraqi invasion was then, and I remember it quite well because I was supposed to have my tonsils removed two days after they came in. So I was like, damn it. So now they still have my tonsil.

[Dax Shepard]

Tonsillitis might have been a happy accident.

[Mo Amer]

No, it's not, bro. You're miserable. I have enormous tonsils.

[Dax Shepard]

I bet they're gorgeous.

[Mo Amer]

They're massive. They are gorgeous. They are mountainous. You can ski over those fucking things for sure.

[Monica Padman]

You should probably get them out now.

[Mo Amer]

I am so scared.

[Dax Shepard]

Adults aren't supposed to do it.

[Mo Amer]

This like 50, 50 bleed or something crazy like heavy bleeding.

[Dax Shepard]

Was it someone on here?

[Mo Amer]

Six weeks to eight weeks recovery. No talking.

[Dax Shepard]

They cauterize it but you can't feel if it's bleeding down into your stomach.

[Mo Amer]

That's all I needed to hear to make it even worse.

[Monica Padman]

Why are the kids more. Why are they able to.

[Dax Shepard]

I don't know if they're tinier or.

[Monica Padman]

They'Re easier to counter.

[Mo Amer]

I think it's not as mature enough. It's a in n out procedure for.

[Dax Shepard]

K. But someone was just telling an adult was really battling whether or not to do it. They don't like to do it on adults because it's bleeding.

[Mo Amer]

I went to the top specialist at UCLA and they were like, 50, 50, they're gonna bleed, but you'll be fine. It's just gonna take a lot longer to heal. I was like, you know what? I'll just take antibiotics.

[Dax Shepard]

Take my big ass tonsils out of here.

[Mo Amer]

I do a lot of voices too. Like, what if it affects how I do all these accents? What if I just end up talking like this all the time now? Yeah, my life is ruined because I sound terrible.

[Dax Shepard]

So the invasion's in August. The US enters as I remember, because my birthday is January 2nd and I got my license in 91 on the 2nd and it was the only thing that played in the radio. I feel like it was maybe January 1st of 91. The US entered.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah, I had left before that. It was really, really intense because that was the first time I knew that we were stateless number one. I just knew this happy life. I didn't know anything was wrong. I was like why don't we just go back to Palestine? And they're like no, we can't necessarily do that either. It's not the best next step. Let's figure it out. Your parents, you see them and they're your pillars. They're always in control. There's nothing ever wrong. Seemingly know everything and to see them so worried. And I remember this to this day. That call at 6am Those days, the phone, you know, I was like who the hell's calling? I remember getting up, picking up the phone was like Saddam is invading Kuwait. Hangs up and now everyone is out to try to get as many resources for the house. Food, rice, water, whatever you can get to just store it. That's when everything changed and they got to our at 1 o' clock in the morning. I've slept through the whole breaking of the door, ransacking the home. They were threatening my mom, my dad. Who's in this bedroom, who's in his bedroom. They were pointing at my bedroom and they were threatening. They were going to throw a grenade in the bedroom.

[Monica Padman]

Oh my God.

[Mo Amer]

Like tell us, tell us, tell us. They were trying to figure out who works at the Equator Oil Company since the whole reason of their invasion to begin with is supposed siphoning of Iraqi oil.

[Dax Shepard]

Was that their premise? They were diagonally drilling in that's what they were saying.

[Mo Amer]

I don't know. That's a bigger conversation. Now as a grown ass man I see what's everything going on living in America now I know who's been putting all these people in power. Yeah, let's talk about that. But that was the premise is that Kuwait was stealing from them and he's there to take it back. But then since it's the Kuwaiti oil company. So our neighborhood was hot one and it was all about collecting people who.

[Dax Shepard]

Could help manage and turn over the control of it.

[Mo Amer]

Exactly.

[Dax Shepard]

Your dad's like I just do telephones.

[Mo Amer]

Well that's the biggest fucking thing, communication. Okay, that was probably on their top five list. Transferring all communication communication to at all. So my dad had one choice. Either do it or potentially your family's at risk. Might take them all out. You're not gonna find out if they're bluffing or not.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, exactly.

[Mo Amer]

You're just gonna say, yeah, that's me. What are you gonna do? So he was forced to go in and redirect, from what I've heard, some of it at that time. And he regrets it. Didn't feel good about any of it.

[Monica Padman]

Well, he had to protect himself and his family.

[Mo Amer]

He loved Kuwait, and he loved the people of Kuwait. He loved everything there. And he was just saddened to see it all happen that way. But he was also just protecting our family. Soldiers would show up early in the morning at our house and all throughout the whole street. It was pretty regular, but I felt like our house was a spot. And play soccer with these guys. Have me, like, hold the machine guns. Like, I don't hold the machine gun. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was that weird. Different life. Just everything changed.

[Dax Shepard]

Right. And trying to evaluate, are these guys mean and evil?

[Mo Amer]

They weren't.

[Dax Shepard]

Right. But when they first show up with.

[Mo Amer]

The guns, they have moments, though. I remember this guy, he had a thick stache. Huge. But I was really fast as a kid, and I played tons of soccer, so I was killing these older guys. He just socks me real hard. And I remember being laid out on the ground, and I look up and I see him, and this is how he felt. Like he was laughing. He goes. And I was like.

[Dax Shepard]

Like a bald villain.

[Mo Amer]

It felt evil. I know he's not. He was just fucking with me. But I can't forget his face. If a sketch artist was sitting here, I can draw him. You never forget that. But, yeah, that was a wild experience that. I slept through that first initial invasion. They took over the whole neighborhood. My mom and dad are both in a really terrible position. My dad particularly, and a bunch of other employees or ex employees. Some people were able to get out before they came in. It's really difficult situation, especially with us kids. And there's other kids who are studying overseas. What about them? And then the money is gone. Yeah, I'm the sixth of six. Okay, so all the money's gone overnight. Saddam said, oh, the Kuwaiti dinar is equivalent to the Iraqi dinar. Well, Kuwaiti dinar was, like, four times. Absolutely insane.

[Dax Shepard]

So how did dad get you guys all out?

[Mo Amer]

In the show, I had to tweak it. But in real life, what happened is my mom got myself and my sister out. My brother stayed with my dad. We got on the bus. My mom strategically hid the money in the suitc in a really insanely savvy way. I never saw the side of my mother. You see your mom's a superhero at this point. Like, how are you coming up with this? Like, grabbing the razor, cutting down the zipper, putting equal amounts of money. It's incredible sewing it together. I just remember it to this day. And going through ad off, basically war zone, through another war zone to Amman, Jordan, to my mom, sending my sister and I to Houston by ourselves.

[Dax Shepard]

How old was your sister? She was 18, so 9 and 18. You're so scared, I'm assuming miserable.

[Mo Amer]

I don't want to le. Give a shit about the guns. Like, it didn't bother me at all. I was very fearless. I did not care. I would go out still on my own, scope it out, what's happening in the neighborhood. I was just kind of crazy that way. But I love my friends and I wanted to see them. And I didn't necessarily allow that invasion to like, change that for me. And I knew they weren't going to hurt me. Like, they're not going to hurt kids. They were very gentle with children, actually. But I didn't want to leave my mother and thought I could be really helpful.

[Dax Shepard]

Right.

[Mo Amer]

It wasn't like, I don't want to leave you, my friends. No. It was more like, hey, I'm a helping hand. This sucks. I have to go. How are you going to do this on your own? And that was the thing that really ripped me apart more than anything.

[Dax Shepard]

Who did she send you to?

[Mo Amer]

My brother. He was studying in Houston.

[Dax Shepard]

Is this the brother that became a doctor?

[Mo Amer]

Yes, he's a PhD in biochemistry. Super brilliant, amazing human. And then she by herself goes back to Kuwait. And that's where all the real hell started. Because there was all this posturing between America and Iraq and say, Saddam is saying, go back. No, we're not going to go back. This is ours. Oh, yeah. Then the oil fields went on fire and. And now it's a completely different world. Literally noon looks like midnight. Then, of course, the Iraqis started to retreat. It was a big heist. They were clearing out Mercedes dealerships. The Iraqis were. Overnight, he released a bunch of prisoners just to create chaos. That was his strategy of war, I guess. Then there was a massive situation that happened with my mom and my dad. My dad in particular. The Kuwaitis started regaining power, as they should. It's their country. They started forming these different militias. They came into our house. This is my story for my mom. They knock on the door, they ask, there's a car for sale. Because we're liquidating everything. And she goes, I don't know if it's for sale. Let me ask my husband. She asks him. And as he comes out, they put a hood over him, kidnap him. He's gone. What? She doesn't know where he is. Nothing. Then the American soldiers come in. So you had the Iraqis come in, burst down the door. You had the Kuwaitis come bursting the door, and then you had the US Soldiers come bursting the back door. My brother is neurodivergent, has his own issues. It's chaos. She's trying to get medicine for him. She doesn't know where my dad is, who's diabetic and has his own set of issues. It's a whole fucking movie. So my dad was able to call my mom. They were, like, holding all these people, trying to see who's the actual traitor, who's not the traitor, who stuck for us, who didn't. They're trying to regain their power. I honestly don't hold anything against equate. I totally get why they're doing it. Unfortunately, my dad was an impossible situation. Somebody has to vouch for you. You can't just leave. They got to know it wasn't an inside job for sure. And I genuinely don't hold anything against them. I really love them. The Kuwaitis are some of the gentle, sweetest people, but in this situation is awful. She doesn't know where my dad is. So they had like all these makeshift prisons and office buildings and stuff that were holding people and torture them certain degree, to get stuff out of them. And what did they have issues with at the jail? Communication. They couldn't get fucking calls out. They couldn't get a dial tone. So my dad goes, I can fix it. Yeah, yeah, he fixed it for him. While he's fixing it, they're not in the room. He calls my mom. Listen, you got to find the prime minister. He's a friend of mine. He loves me. He's the head guy in Kuwait. You got to talk to him. He's the only one that can free me. Just get to him and let's get the hell out of here. And my mom's like, what about the money? We have to get your money. You're owed this. This is your money you worked 25 years for. Got to get it back. And my dad's like, fuck the money. Just get me out of this hellhole. And my mom goes, the gangster that she is, I'm gonna find this guy and I'm gonna get your money. She's Driving soot is in the air. It's just disgusting. All these oil rigs on fire has caused chaos throughout the roads, in the environment, and breathing everything. So now she's just on a journey trying to find him. This is three weeks. Oh, wow. She says, it was one time. The militia had this checkpoint. They told her, how do we know this car is not stolen? Because people are just stealing so much. He goes, I need to see the title for this car. She goes, I don't know where the title is for the car. Well, you need to find it. You can't get through here. She goes back to the house. She swore to God, she said, I don't know how it happened, but I couldn't see anything. It was pitch black. I just reach into a pile of papers, and it's the title to the car. Most incredible thing. She goes in. After weeks of weeks trying to trace this guy down, she finds some jail. She hears that he's there, this prime minister. She's talking to the outside security. She's crying to him, saying, my husband's been wrongly in prison. He goes, if you don't stop crying, I'm gonna put you in jail with him. Like, kind of threatening her. She goes, listen, I need to talk to the prime minister. He knows my husband. He gets scared. He's like, what? Oh, yeah, he's here. So my mom walks into this building. She can hear guys not having the best time. Let's just say that, yeah, she's walking down this flickery hallway. She goes and makes a right into the guy's office. She looks around the office. It's pristine. It's gorgeous. It's the direct opposite of the building. She just walk through. But then she looks at all the technology in the room. She recognizes it immediately. She goes, this is all my husband's stuff. And he says, who are you? She tells him who she is, tells him who her husband is. He freaks out. He's like, where's most of I love him. Where is he at? He's not a trade. He's a great man. How many letters you need? I'll sign them all. Sign a letter for her. She went back to pick him up at the airport. They meet at the airport with my brother. My dad comes in, he's 50 days now, full beard. And they go, where's your two other. The kids? And she goes, oh, they already left. And they go, how do we know they're not here and they're hiding? We imprisoned his father. He's innocent. What if they want revenge? Or something. He's like, we don't want revenge. We forgive you. Forget it. He's over there. He's like, no. Now you got to show proof.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, Jesus.

[Mo Amer]

She has to go by another two days of that. Then she collects my dad, they go to Amman. My mom, my brother come like nine months later.

[Dax Shepard]

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[Monica Padman]

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Lost my narrative, or rather it was stolen from me. And the Monica Lewinsky that my friends and family knew was usurped by false narratives, callous jokes and politics. I would define reclaiming as to take back back what was yours. Something you possess is lost or stolen, and ultimately you triumph in finding it again. So I think listeners can expect me to be chatting with folks both recognizable and unrecognizable, names about the way that people have navigated roads to triumph My hope is that people will finish an episode of Reclaiming and feel like they filled their tank up, they connected with the people that I'm talking about talking to, and leave with maybe some nuggets that help them feel a little more hopeful. Follow Reclaiming with Monica Lewinsky on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to Reclaiming early and ad free right now by joining Wondery plus in the Wondery app or on Apple podcasts.

[Dax Shepard]

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[Mo Amer]

Yeah, I've never told the story. It's crazy that I said 92. Your dad called about 92. I got Houston two days before Halloween in 1990 and then Halloween happened and I've never Halloween before. Why is everybody dressed like demons? Where did my mom send me?

[Dax Shepard]

This is evil. You've heard we were a godless country.

[Mo Amer]

And boy, it was so funny.

[Dax Shepard]

It was so sad.

[Monica Padman]

Everyone in devil costumes.

[Mo Amer]

I've never even seen cleavage. And like all the girls are naked. I'm like, you know, just crazy.

[Monica Padman]

Asking for chocolate and candies.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah, exactly. You know, it's just, wow, check our drink. And I had a British accent. I stuck out like a sore thumb. Nobody really researched the neighborhood we moved into. It wasn't like the greatest neighborhood right out the gate. My brother, he doesn't know. He's a young kid too. He's a super nerd. It was next to a stop and go and that's the only thing we had. I would go there and that's when I knew America. I'm gonna go back to war.

[Dax Shepard]

What'd your mom and dad do in the States?

[Mo Amer]

Once he came to the States, he's an entrepreneur, so he owned electronic stores actually in Kuwait as well, like a side gig. He was like the first Best Buy there. It's like Radio Shack. Bas before Radio Shack.

[Dax Shepard]

So he opened up a place in Houston.

[Mo Amer]

He opened up a 99 cent store. But then he started with his knowledge, realizing that it's a poor neighborhood. He was like, oh, I can bring telephones that they don't have access to for a really great price. So he brings them in and he starts showing him 99 cents plus. That's how they get you. Is that plus?

[Dax Shepard]

Sure.

[Mo Amer]

So it's a wide range of goods.

[Monica Padman]

How do we American culture pretty quickly.

[Mo Amer]

Pretty quickly.

[Dax Shepard]

Necklace.

[Mo Amer]

He wore a suit. Every day he would call people from.

[Dax Shepard]

The living room and tell them they want a free cruise.

[Mo Amer]

He figured it all out. Free telephone.

[Monica Padman]

It's 200.

[Mo Amer]

Congratulations. It's so funny. But he would sell these phones, had a whole display of a wide variety of phones that did different things, whether if it's a football phone, whether it's one that you could push a hold button and it plays music of your choosing and you're like, what? That was like the tech of that time. So he had a. All of it and we would sell like hotcakes. So I think that eventually he would have probably gotten back in the telecom and the way that cell phones are today. I mean, I always think about it. I had a discussion yesterday, I was like, I wonder. Probably been very rich actually. Think about it.

[Dax Shepard]

Certainly.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah. So he dies in 94, December 1995.

[Dax Shepard]

So you're young, you're 14.

[Mo Amer]

I'm 14, yep.

[Dax Shepard]

Why did he die so prematurely?

[Mo Amer]

I think it's the losing everything in your late 50s. I say it's like going from rags to essentially riches and going to rags again. After spending your whole life trying to create a future for yourself and your family and your kids and having the ability to provide for them on a level that is going to be really difficult to do at this age. And he never really diversified his funds. It was so safe in Kuwait. Never really thought something was going to go down like this. And unfortunately that's what happened. I think, think all my dad's friends and my uncles, they all died fairly young. The massive, massive stress of the war, carrying that burden, carrying that weight around really took its toll and eventually chipped away at him, unfortunately.

[Dax Shepard]

How scary does Life get at 14 with him now out of the picture?

[Mo Amer]

Oh, it's terrible. Emotionally, you're gone. I was already checked out because my mom didn't come for like nine months. So I was really angry about being there without my mom. My sister is an absolute sin. God Bless her. She only knew how cook one dish. One of the things that my mom gave my sister was a recipe book that had all these different pieces of paper from different eras from my grandmother, my great grandmother, from my great, great, great grandma. It went back almost 100 plus years. It's pretty intense. But these are all the recipes. These are gold. But she would only make one dish. And I just come home seven days in a row. I was like, rice and lentil again. Where's my mom? I want to go home. And meanwhile, cut to my mom, she's like driving through oil fields and trying to find you little ungr. It was really difficult. And I was always very independent and adventurous and I wanted to be out. Nobody could really control me and I didn't know what to do with my emotions. So I was a 14 year old kid in high school. I was just skipping. I already knew I was going to be a comedian.

[Dax Shepard]

Did you make friends easily?

[Mo Amer]

Oh, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

So you landed on your feet. You were social.

[Mo Amer]

It was rough at first. The British English thing did not help. It was a Mexican situation pretty regularly. But then the British accent was like, you're not Mexican, but what the hell are you? Yeah, usually in my class, I was the first Mohammed there. I spoke British English and at times I did not know that British English, certain words were significantly different meaning than American English. Like, I walked up to my fourth grade teacher. I was like, Mrs. Strand, can I have a rubber, please? I made a mess on my paper, you know? And she's like, what? You came on your paper? You came on your paper.

[Dax Shepard]

You were wearing a purple accent.

[Mo Amer]

You fucking in fourth grade? What is fucking? You know, like, I had no idea we had a cat. You don't say cat in British English. You say pussy. And I walked up to Bruce at recess. The most embarrassing. Oh, no possible spot. I was like, bruce, que sua. He was like, what, man? He was like, I have a pussy now. Isn't it fantastic? And he was like, what? I learned this quickly about black people. They can't hold it in. They have to tell everybody. They like, come on. Everybody got around. Everybody.

[Dax Shepard]

Fresh off the presses.

[Mo Amer]

Exactly. He got everybody around in front of the entire class at recess. He was like, watch this. He's like, mo, do you have a? And I was like, yeah, I have a. Is it lovely? It's small and fluffy. Just kept going with it. Jose lost his mind. He was like, what, bro? You. You have a Pinocchio for real, bro? He was like, so conf. Confused.

[Dax Shepard]

This playground sounds like a Sitcom.

[Mo Amer]

And he paused and he goes, can I see it, bro? Like. Like, I don't believe you. Yeah, I got punched a lot in the beginning, but I learned quickly.

[Dax Shepard]

You had the right skill set. It sounds like, minimally, you weren't lonely. That's a blessing.

[Mo Amer]

When I threw a football, everything changed. It was like, oh, this guy can throw the. Out of a football.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, no kidding.

[Mo Amer]

You could very, Like, I would play ball, play basketball. I was very unassumed. Nobody knew that I could play that well. I wasn't always, like, overweight. I almost died in sixth grade. I hit my head on the bottom, and that's when I gained all the weight because I was in a neck brace like this the whole time. Terrifying. I don't know why. I knew exactly what I had to do. I was spitting blood again. It was almost Halloween, so everybody thought I had, like, blood capsules. And I was joking around at the pool, and I was like, no, guys, I think I'm about to die. I walked right past my mom, grabbed a towel, wrapped it around my neck. I was like, mom, you need to take me to the hospital.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, God, you're so lucky you weren't paralyzed.

[Mo Amer]

So lucky you wasn't paralyzed or dead. I just think about it. Not even for that. I think about, like, my mom.

[Dax Shepard]

She didn't have enough on her plane. Yeah, okay. So what's happening financially, though, when dad is out of the picture?

[Mo Amer]

Just have to fend for yourself. You have to figure it out. So my mom worked at a Mexican restaurant, which turned into Taco Cabana, which is very famous in Houston. Everybody goes to Taco Bell.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, okay.

[Mo Amer]

It's like the fast food chain of Tex Mex. Dinner was lots of Mexican food, but also, you can negotiate for rides. Hey, man, I'll throw in a quesadilla. If you can just bring me here or take me there. I had two quesadillas. All right, now you're asking for a lot. We do two quesadillas and tacos, but I want four rides. We just negotiate. Honestly, it was really dark. But also some of my greatest years and my friends that I've made when I was 11 years old in that particular neighborhood. We're like the sandlot. We made a pact. We're gonna raise our kids together. We're gonna go to college together. I always said, I'm gonna be a comedian. You guys are gonna go to college. I'll visit you guys. And everything really panned out exactly how we all set out to be. And really, truly, that Group of friends. That camaraderie, that brotherhood that we created in that beautiful neighborhood got me through everything that. That support system all the while.

[Dax Shepard]

You guys applied for asylum?

[Mo Amer]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

You don't have passports. Right. You don't have a Kuwaiti passport.

[Mo Amer]

In the Middle east, it's all about your lineage. So when you go there, actually, when you enter, they say, what is your origin? And you say, palestinian. You either get Palestinian ID cards, it's worthless. It's actually worse. My uncle always taught me, don't get the ID card. If you do, then you're not ever be able to fly into Tel Aviv. When you get your US passport, you're always going to be subjugated to the cages. You literally have to go through. Through this apartheid system where you go through cages. He says, just don't do it.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. And even though you were born in Kuwait, you don't have any.

[Mo Amer]

That's not how it works. It's all based off of your origin, where your parents come from.

[Dax Shepard]

Right.

[Mo Amer]

So my parents are both Palestinian. So you're Palestinian. You don't get Kuwaiti because in Kuwait, it's all tribal. So if you're an original Kuwaiti from that area, the government takes care, like you should.

[Dax Shepard]

You get a stipend.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah. So the resources that your country is producing, you actually benefit from those resources. They can't do it for everyone. So it's like you have to be from that land. And your right is your right. My right is in the west bank in Palestine, or in Haifa. That was now gone as Israel. So now we go to the west bank, and whatever is there, that's for you, but that's not for you here. So that's not how it works. It's where you're actually from, where your parents are from, particularly.

[Dax Shepard]

So I guess we get into some of the complexities of this. This immigration story you have, because you're just waiting forever on the asylum list. However, that process works. But in the meantime, you have no passport. You can't come and go. You're just in this kind of purgatory.

[Mo Amer]

Yes, exactly.

[Dax Shepard]

For how long?

[Mo Amer]

Took me 20 years before I got citizenship. But when I turned 18 is when I was able to get a Social Security card. I was in the system before, but I couldn't get the social.

[Dax Shepard]

And you can't work until you have a social.

[Mo Amer]

You can't work. I'm still worked. My mom would volunteer me down there. Business owners, when I had jobs that I didn't want to do, but I did where I would Sell like, fake Rolexes or fake watches through my dad because he would go to the wholesale district once he passed away. Alhamdul, God rest his soul. His friend gave me a job, and then I started learning about wholesale business, import, export. And I started seeing this guy wearing this nice watch. I'm like, bro, that's crazy. He goes, that's fake. I was like, oh, it looks amazing, though. And so I was like, oh, I think I could hustle these in school and on the street here. All I have to do is wear it, and then they're going to ask me where you got it. I'm going tell them it's for sale. So that was my shtick. I would just put on a Versace sunglasses and be working at the cashier or whatever. And people be like, oh, man, those are dope. I'm like, oh, it's the last pair, bro. Yeah, I'll sell them to you if you want. It's 1:25. They would leave and I'd take out another pair and put it on shirt.

[Dax Shepard]

Shirts, your second to last pair.

[Mo Amer]

And it would be so bad because the end of the week, they're all wearing the same same. And it would come in really mad and aggressive, like, bro, you told me it was the last one. I was like, look, for real, though, this is one of one. This Movado watch is the only one I have. There's no other design of this. I promise you, nobody else is going to have this. And he'd be like, oh, man, that's cool. I was like, yeah, I would sell that one.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, my God.

[Mo Amer]

I was really good at it. To the point my dad's friend put his own standup. And I was like, why are you doing this? You're not going to compete with me. This is crazy. He goes, bro, you're selling at my location. And that's where I learned about business, right? It was like, oh, I'm using your place of business. I owe you commission.

[Dax Shepard]

You gotta kick up.

[Mo Amer]

I didn't know this. He goes, it's a valuable lesson. Don't worry, you still sell. Just give me the commission. I was like, okay, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

When we meet Mo on season one, he's selling shit out of his truck. He's got like a full.

[Mo Amer]

It's a very condensed version. I really wanted to do more with it, but I think there's not enough space. And it's so hard to figure out. In the first season, it was a whole thing with COVID and civil unrest and George Floyd. It was like a Nightmare. Making season one, it was really, really tough. But season two, I had the whole vision for it. I knew exactly what I wanted to do.

[Dax Shepard]

I had the time to do the Reader's Digest version. You go to the rodeo and Bill Cosby's performing. You're young and you see that. You decide you want to do that. You're a shit student. A teacher says to you, I'll let you stand up so long as you're making fun of the course material. Yeah, that's a lucky, weird thing that happens.

[Mo Amer]

Mrs. Reed and Ms. Broderick, my English teachers, specifically Mrs. Reed, she really was noticing that. That I was losing it. Cause I was a pretty good student before that. And I basically threw away my ninth grade year, essentially at that point. And she was trying to salvage whatever she could out of me. She said, if you go up in front of the class, like, first she said, how would your father feel if you don't graduate? Which I was like, oh, that's a cold shock. Hit me in the hardest way. And then she was like, don't you want to be a comedian? I was like, yes. Look, I'll let you do standup in class. If you could throw in some Shakespeare that we're working on now. You'll get extra credit, but you don't always have to do it. And I was like, great. Can I do it now? I literally want to front of the class, read out of the book. I don't know this by heart. It's monologue from Macbeth, you know, like, I don't fucking know this. And so I did just a funny version, the British voice that I used to have, and kids were dying. I was like, I'm hooked. So I was like, it's free. Can I come in tomorrow and I'll write a set tonight? And she was like, okay. Did it kill it? And I was like, oh, my God. And then I would just do it every Friday. And she took me into theater arts department. It was Ms. Kreisner, who I'm still close to to this day, my theater teacher from high school, she goes, listen, this kid's been coming to class. He's doing all this original material I've never heard before. He's doing all these accents. It's hilarious. She goes, I think he belongs here. Yeah. Ye. And I was like, maybe the next year. Did theater. Graduated with honors in theater. Honorary thespian. Had a partial scholarship for the School of Film and Television in New York. I passed on that. Didn't even tell a single soul. I don't want them to talk me into it. I didn't want to leave my mother or my brother. I wanted to be close and just build up my stand up chops and let that define my career.

[Dax Shepard]

And then you enter at 18, this funniest text.

[Mo Amer]

And Houston's funniest person competition. They have this around the country in each city. But that was a big one, if you can get into that. That was my first time on stage at a comedy club. And I get there and I was so excited. My buddy Nick who drove me to club, he was my guy. He still is.

[Dax Shepard]

For two quesadillas.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah, for two quesadillas. That's right. He looks at me, he was trying to be corny. He's like, you ready Mo? This is the first day of the rest of your life. But he was being serious also. And then I went up, caught the bug, made this wild car position. I realized when I signed up, I was like, oh shit. My materials for high school students. These are grown ass adults. Need to fix this. So I rewrote something till 3 o' clock in the morning. I go up, I do it and I get into the system that way and I find out what, what I need to do. I joined it the following year. I made the finals, didn't win the thing. But then I went off and just started doing standup. By the time I was 19, 20 years old, I was already headlining shows and traveling overseas without a passport.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, how is that?

[Mo Amer]

You got a refugee travel document. And it was a really painful process, very expensive, but that was the only way to go overseas.

[Dax Shepard]

Because you were doing a lot of standup at bases, right?

[Mo Amer]

I did some bases. The first tour that I did was April of 2001. It was Italy, Germany and Sicily. Was a baby, obviously five months before 9, 11. It was just a totally different experience. And then I went Japan, Korea and Guam, all those military bases. In February of 2002. It was polar opposite from when the first time. Now everything is heightened. But I wanted to do those shows and be myself because I was deathly afraid of being myself. I said, if I can go in front of the troops and be myself, talk shit, make them laugh. I could be myself in front of anybody. That's why they love me. I went on many, many tours and my experience was actually that the soldiers themselves had interacted with someone like me many times and they were excited to see me versus when I was touring in the south. Early on in my career, it was their first interaction with someone like me. It was that Polar opposite. They're actually well traveled human beings and more knowledgeable than you think. And it's not as unsafe as I thought it was. I went back to Iraq. I did shows there still with a refugee travel document, in war zones, the very place that. That we left. And I'm doing shows on bases all throughout Iraq in the most desolate of locations where they could fucking kill me and throw me somewhere no one's going to care. I had some of the best sets and one of one experiences in a state, in Saddam Hussein's palace just converted into a hotel. And I just went there just to see it for myself and collect information and put this thing to rest that's in my heart. That was just lingering. And I wanted to see my aunt that I haven't seen in 19 years. She was the only one that was still living in Kuwait at the time. So it was many different things. I had to sneak into the country. Bas I'm here for the US Government. Kind of just moving him in that direction. He was like, okay. And he just let me in. And then when I was leaving, I stayed three extra days to see my aunt. And I wasn't supposed to, right? So the military wanted to walk me back to the airplane with the other comedian, Olivia Arrington. And I was like, we're fine. We're adults, bro. We're going to go. And he's like, no, no military protocol. I got to escort you all the way to the plane. I was like, dang it, how the hell am I going to do this? And Olivia's like, maybe you go hide in the fucking bathroom. I was like, okay. And then he gets a call and he runs to the suv. See him talking. This is what's going on. He comes back, he's like, sorry, guys, Bradley Cooper just landed from Afghanistan. I gotta go get him. We're like, all right.

[Dax Shepard]

Thank you, Bradley, you wanna hear something crazy? I was with him.

[Mo Amer]

Yes. Dude, that's fucking nuts. It was me, Bradley. My body just got chilled.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, that was wild, dude.

[Mo Amer]

I remember the fucking flyer. It's all hitting me right now.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. And we were in Kuwait and we went on a boat ride in Iraq. There was like Zodiac boats and they were fucking doing cool maneuvers and shit, bro.

[Mo Amer]

I want to, like, laugh and cry at the same time.

[Dax Shepard]

Somehow I'm involved.

[Monica Padman]

Stimulation.

[Dax Shepard]

I didn't see that coming, bro.

[Mo Amer]

I didn't see it coming either. Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

That's when I got the food poisoning. Coming home from that. We had been in Afghanistan for eight days, and I have been Eating at the Defect, like microwave hamburgers. We get to the Kuwait first class lounge, and I'm looking at all this fresh tabouli and delicious vegetables, and I'm pounding it. And Cooper goes, bro, you're going very hard on the salad bar in Kuwait. And I'm like, it's good. It's a first class.

[Mo Amer]

That's what I'll get you, by the way. It's a damn salad.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, it's always salad. Wisteria. You got to be careful.

[Mo Amer]

100%.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah. Freaking out.

[Dax Shepard]

That's hilarious.

[Mo Amer]

I'm freaking out because I did tell Bradley Cooper. That's so wild.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Mo Amer]

There. I remember the poster.

[Monica Padman]

Was there anyone else or just YouTube?

[Mo Amer]

There's another person.

[Dax Shepard]

It was Bradley and his cousin. Me and Aaron.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, wow.

[Dax Shepard]

That's really wild.

[Monica Padman]

You literally crossed paths.

[Dax Shepard]

They were literally all there at the same time then. Because I was about to say, yeah. They didn't let us do shit. Anytime we tried to wander or stray or. The first time I went, we landed in Qatar. The GI's took us to a nightclub and it was like, I'm going to go on the dance floor. I had to get that cleared. There's too much they don't want the drama of.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah, of course. It's not about getting kidnapped. Is you merely making an ass yourself? Making them look bad because there's literal money at stake that they get every year. Last thing they want is that getting up guy bozoed out. You know, like, thanks a lot. But we're getting half a billion dollars over here and you want to have a good time. I fucked up this contract.

[Dax Shepard]

Monica's so sick of this story. But I still think it's very funny that I did this. I had heard on my first tour that Larry the Cable Guy was coming the next week. And you know, they make you sign all this shit when you're there. You're signing the Apaches, the Blackhawks. You're just signing everything.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And everything I signed, which had been signed by all the previous people, I wrote on every single one. Get her done. Dax Shepard. Cause I'm like, he's not gonna have the catchphrase. I'm gonna steal it.

[Mo Amer]

I love it.

[Dax Shepard]

What does he write?

[Mo Amer]

I really like that line.

[Dax Shepard]

It's kind.

[Monica Padman]

What we were saying at Kimmel.

[Mo Amer]

I love that. Actually, they didn't make us sign shit. Walk in, like, come on, get on stage, bitch. Tell us a joke. Okay, guys. Hey. It's really rough out here, eh?

[Dax Shepard]

If you were tracking your standup career when Are the big level ups? Because, of course, I become aware of you watching Ramy, which I love, and I'm like, who's this most hysterical person who needs his own show? And then immediately had his own show?

[Mo Amer]

Thank you.

[Dax Shepard]

That's my experience with you. So what was happening in that standup?

[Mo Amer]

It's different levels that you start to pass. In 2011, Dave was making his comeback, starting to, like, really tour. And then we happened to be in the Bay at the same time. He was in Oakland, I was in the Bay doing standup, and it was me and my buddy Azarusman, Longtime collaborator. Worked for years. He was like, dave's in town. Let's just go over and hang out. So I would go over, hang out with him, and he was like, hey, you want to open? I was like, yeah. I go up. And then he was like, you want to come tomorrow? I was like, yeah, cool. He's like, you know, I'm going to Atlanta. You want to come to Atlanta? I was like, yeah, cool. Next thing you know, it's eight years of just constant touring with him. But 20, 2014 was the big turning point for me with Dave. He just gave me the inspiration. After a show at the House of Blues in Dallas, he walks up to me after my set. He's like, mo, man. He said, it's killer, bro. What if you do a short film in front of your special? I produce it. I think if you do it right, you could win an Emmy. And, like, hits me in, like, the shoulder. I was like, oh, shit. Short film. I couldn't sleep to save my life. It was like a week or two or two of me just obsessing on what this short film would be. Must have listened to a hundred tracks. I'm really visual person. I need music to help me illustrate the entire picture. And it just clicked when I listened to Elvis Presley's that's All Right, Mama. That song, that's all right, mama. That's all right now. That's all right, mama. You just do as you do. Oh, that's all right. You know, when he did that, I saw my mom putting everything together, getting us out of Kuwait. I just saw the entire thing, which is the same scene that's in episode seven now of the first scene season. I wanted it to be the opening, but anyway, I put it together. I was like, this is it. I was trying to pitch Dave on it, and Dave was like, oh, God, what if this sucks? You know, I inspired this guy to do it.

[Dax Shepard]

It's a personal story.

[Mo Amer]

I gotta tell Him. It sucks. It's always a scary thing. I get that. But I knew it didn't suck. I knew it was badass. Was on the bus on tour in Austin. I grabbed his speaker, I was like, you're listening to this. And I put it in, put it down, and I mapped the whole thing out for him. He was smoking some cigarette. He goes, shit, Mo, that's genius. Don't do it in the special. You need to do a TV show. I was like, fuck a TV show. So now it became this whole other obsession. So I started writing down all these really transformative moments of my life. Young kid or teenager or an adult, my experience in war, all these significant scenes, or even a moment with my grandmother how she was teaching me how to eat hummus. Things that I've never forgotten that I put in season two. I just put them on index cards to. By scene, I would work it out. So I'd had a hundred scenes accumulated that I just could mine through. I told ramy about it. 2014, early 15, actually. I was like, yeah, I think I have this idea, but I want to do my stand up special first. He goes, no, let's do your TV show. This is great. I was like, yeah, but I think I should do my special first. I did for Netflix at that point. That explains a lot of the story. And then I can go into the series. And then he was like, well, fuck, if you're not going to do that, I'm going to make my own show. So he goes off and makes his own show and he was like, come do my show. And I was like, I don't know.

[Dax Shepard]

Because you want to do your own show.

[Mo Amer]

It's not about the own thing. I'm just very, very protective of ideas. And once you put ideas out, they're kind of over with. Yeah, I just didn't know if it was right or not. I really wasn't sure.

[Dax Shepard]

Because you're playing Mo, who owns a restaurant on Rami, and you're like, well, now am I stuck with that character?

[Mo Amer]

Right, right. People would tell me that that was like an argument initially. And I was like, I really don't care.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Nor should you. But I could see that being something you were hung up on.

[Mo Amer]

That was something I was totally hung up on. I was thinking about it. It was just like, I was just curious. And then later on, he always jokes. He's like, remember I begged you to do this. I was like, no, you didn't fucking be. It was just going through the bullshit. You Know, just trying to figure it out and making sure that it's the right thing for you and for me, like, it's all love. Last thing I want to do is do something bad for you either. It was an awesome thing.

[Dax Shepard]

But being on Rami is the first on screen acting I think I did.

[Mo Amer]

Crashing first like a guest star.

[Dax Shepard]

That was Pete.

[Mo Amer]

Pete, yeah. Pete's show.

[Dax Shepard]

This is an impossible question to answer for you, but you're immediately so insanely natural. Were you shocked by your own ability?

[Mo Amer]

We try to be humble right now. Show some hum.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm saying you can't really answer this question, but I have to imagine there's a big relief at how fucking relaxed and in your body you are.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah, for sure.

[Dax Shepard]

That's an unknown.

[Monica Padman]

It's not easy.

[Mo Amer]

Most people are.

[Dax Shepard]

Most people are bad at it.

[Monica Padman]

You get really rigid in front of the camera. Most people do.

[Mo Amer]

I feel like I was completely born to do it. It feels so good and comfortable. Loved it. I felt like I finally was doing the thing that I was always meant to do.

[Dax Shepard]

Maybe more than stand up.

[Mo Amer]

It's close. I love stand up so much. I love stand up because of the vulnerability and a allowing yourself just to speak your mind and ability just to do three shows at Chicago Theater, man, It's its own thing. But we just did 10,000 people. Like, I'm just backstage, literally thanking God before I'm introduced. Just remembering sleeping on fucking floors. Every spot you can imagine, every airport, every courtyard, anything, just to try to make it so. I'm very grateful for that. But this whole experience, like, oh, this is what I'm built for. I'm built to tell stories. I'm built to do television, built to do movies. Doing Black Adam was huge, too. I felt so natural in all that. And then just start reflecting, collecting about my life, you know, I didn't create myself. It's okay to talk about it. Like, I didn't make me.

[Dax Shepard]

You're the product of a lot of context.

[Mo Amer]

But also there's certain things, bro, that'll blow your mind. The guttural feeling I had when I saw Stand up for the first time and the journey that it was supposed to take me on, that wasn't the first time. I thought it was, but it's not. When I was seven in Egypt, my dad took us to a play. And the lead of that play, his name is Adel Imam. He's an iconic Middle Eastern actor, Egyptian. He's like the goat of goats of all comedic cinema and live performance. I love this man. I Watched him. I'm seven. I don't really even know totally what they're saying, but it's a captivating experience on that trip. There is a photo that literally tells the future. If you look at that photo, I know it sounds crazy to say this, but I'll show it to you. It literally tells the entire future of what I'm supposed to do. It's absolutely baffling. And then my mom, as much as she was so worried about my future because she's never heard about stand up is a really viable art professional or a career path. It's a long one. It's an arduous one. Of course, she has every right to be like, this fucking sucks.

[Dax Shepard]

I know. Engineering results in a roof over your head.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah, exactly. But she didn't really understand. And then she told me recently, she goes, when you were 18 months, when you barely could start walking, you're running around, you would turn off the TV and you would start entertaining us on front of the television. It's already there. I don't know why it's there, but it's there. But then this picture, bro, it'll freak you out. I gotta pull it up.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, we need to see it. Okay, we have the picture up.

[Mo Amer]

This is in Egypt. This is the last family vacation in 1988. I'm in the red short, right? Yep, 1988. The guy that has hands on my shoulders, his name is Yousef Idris. He's literally one of the most legendary screenplay and authors of any generation in the Middle East. Okay. I'm wearing a shirt that's basically a US military recruitment shirt that nobody knows I'm wearing. Clearly we've run out of stuff because we extended our stay.

[Monica Padman]

It says, join the forces.

[Mo Amer]

Kill, Kill. It's absurd, right? My mom clearly run out of shit, right? So it's there, it's gone. She just picked out a bunch of stuff. We ran out of things. She didn't even look at it. I have a camcorder. It's an over the shoulder camcorder. This is the very camcorder that I found 30 years later that's in the series. If you watch the ending, that's what I'm holding.

[Dax Shepard]

You show footage of your father in Palestine, right?

[Mo Amer]

I do. When my aunt told me about this camcorder, I was literally asking about it. Two days prior, I was on tour in the Middle East. I look at my manager, I'm like, look at this picture. I was reflecting on this photo and I was like, wait, what does this fucking shirt Say. And I started zooming into it. I was like, oh, my God. And I look at the camcorder. I was like, I have so many memories with this camcorder. It's insane. I was like, most of. Isn't it crazy? The guy who has hands on my shoulders is one of the greatest writers of our generation of filmmakers, storytellers. I have a camcorder in my hand. The two main characters after me in my show is my mom and my brother. And the US military invades Kuwait two years after this.

[Monica Padman]

That is wild.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, yeah. That's really, really.

[Mo Amer]

It's so insane. And the camcorder itself goes missing. I think it's gone. And bring this up in Kuwait. I'm being really reflective. It's very painful. And also, I'm going there. They're building a tent for me to do a show. It's like, oh, my God, what's happened? Really? In this deep sense of reflection, my aunt is going in and out of memory. She's having Alzheimer's, starting to really get worse. But she remembers me holding my hand. Don't go, don't go, don't go. I'm just looking at the clock. I was like, I'm so sorry. I have to go up in, like an hour. I have to go. She's, like, begging not to go. It was so gut wrenching. I'm sitting there in my hotel room just crying.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, bro.

[Mo Amer]

I wonder what happened to this camcorder. I always remember this. I'm just reflecting and how everything is happening. I hear people cheering from outside the room. 2000 seat or whatever they built for me.

[Dax Shepard]

This is just surreal, trying to integrate.

[Mo Amer]

All this, trying to just make sense of it all. Like, how did this all happen? It's nuts. I was like, everybody, can you please leave? I just didn't know how to reconcile it. But I was having not, like, anxiety about going on, but I just didn't know how to channel my feelings anymore. And so I call actually FaceTime. Dave, he was like, oh, man. Ian had one of the best fucking sets you ever had. I already see it. And I just wiped my tears like, you, right? Went up. Literally one of the best. I did 90 minutes just destroying the place. Freestyling, integrating Arabic to English. It was like a masterclass. It was like, fuck it. Two days later, when I'm on Jordan, I'm visiting my other aunt and we're hugging, kisses. She's loving on me. She's like another mom to me. We just ate a really dense meal and I was trying not to, like, pass out. And I hear her say, or hear of a curb quarter. That's what it sounded like to me. I was like, what? Oh, God, it's so sleepy. I was like, did she say a camcorder? No. And I didn't register it. Then I see her walk back in. She has back problems. She's in her late 70s. This camcorder. I was like, what the. I just freaked out. And then my cousin walks in with a bag full of VHS tapes. I was like, what is going on, dude? That night, I'm in the hotel room. I'm staring at the video camera. I have my opening act, Adi Khalifa, and my manageable stuff in the room. I can't stop thinking about it. And Adi goes, you want to see if it works, don't you? I was like, yeah. I open it up. Yeah, plug it in. Comes right on. I was like, give me a VHS tape. Give me. I could watch in the little viewfinder. First tape, Michael Jackson. I was like, I'll take it out the next tape, Michael Jackson. I was like, guys, next tape. It's a house party. We don't know where. We don't know what it is. I watch him for about five minutes. I was like, oh, where's my dad? I really want to see my dad. I was like, he's probably filming, damn it. Right as I say that, he walks into the frame. He's taking pictures of everybody. He's, like, dancing. I'm losing it. I'm, like, laughing. Yeah, crying, laughing, crying. Meanwhile, my friend Adi, my opening eye. I didn't know he was filming, but I was for 17 minutes watching. He filmed the entire thing. And I caught footage of me as a little kid in our house in Kuwait. And it was just insane to get footage from my dad that I didn't know existed anymore. Nobody had. And I found it almost 30 years later.

[Dax Shepard]

Stay tuned for more Armchair Expert if you dare. Did it almost help you go, oh, yeah, that was real?

[Mo Amer]

It did. That's a great way to put it.

[Dax Shepard]

It's so far away in so many ways, geographically and time wise to see it. I would imagine you go, like, all right. I haven't imagined this whole thing.

[Mo Amer]

No, this is absolutely real. And of course, seeing my mom and young, and she's serving fruits, and there was a tape where we're at our house. And my dad was very hospitable. He just loves artists as well. He'd have people there. It was guys reciting poetry, freestyling, and they would get your name. He would Go Dax, Dax, dax. Da daaaaa. You know, they would play off of it and they would go on a rant about you. It was so special. And I'm sitting there wide awake and all the little kids are, like, sleeping, except me. You can tell I'm loving this.

[Dax Shepard]

You went in on it.

[Mo Amer]

It was super cool. And just having footage of my dad grabbing me like that, it was just killed me, man. I was like, so happy. While I'm recreating this scene, forget that id, because I cast him as my cousin in the show. And as we're about to do the scene, he goes, remember, I was with you when that happened. He's like, remember I filmed it. I was like, oh, my God, Eddie. That's right. I sent it to my editor. I was like, hey, here's the doc footage of me discovering it. Here's the actual footage that's on there. If you could just hold it for me and then do a rough cut at the end so people know that there's a real story.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Mo Amer]

And when I saw it in the cut, I, like, lost my fucking mind, weeping, like, what did I just do? It was like one of those things that only the divine can facilitate. Something like that. It's impossible.

[Monica Padman]

I think it's hard when people die. You kind of remember their death. That's the first thing that is top of mind. So to click back into their life when they were happy and joyous and living with vitality, that's a gift.

[Mo Amer]

I feel that.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, that's beautiful. Now the show is twice 100% on Rotten Tomatoes. You won, and I'm very jealous. There's only one award I've ever coveted, and I campaign for all the time, and I don't even know what it gets awarded for. But the Peabody.

[Mo Amer]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

That to me feels like, oh, you transcended Hollywood somehow.

[Mo Amer]

It was beautiful.

[Dax Shepard]

It's kind of a rad group to join of the people I know for sure. Malcolm Gladwell.

[Mo Amer]

I felt that way about the AFI too. I was just in a room, and they only picked 10 shows and 10 films. And that's it.

[Dax Shepard]

That's so cool.

[Mo Amer]

And you're just in that room. You're like, oh, my God, Sigourney Weaver. Fucking Steven Spielberg, James Cameronite talking about watches like, Better Call Saul is honored. So you have everyone there. Bobkirk. I'm like, what's going going on, bro? It's nuts. And then they bring in Al Pacino to tell a story, like, out of nowhere. It was like, I hate award shows. You Know, I really hate award shows, but. Because there's a bunch of losers. But you guys are all winners. That's nice. Yeah, that's nice. He really walked in like that. He was like, I got a paper. I got a speech. But I fucking hate papers. I just want to tell you a little story. One of the best stories ever. I don't know. You know, the first role I did was Godfather. You heard of it? You know, I can't believe it. I'm fucking doing a Godfather. I just got to tell you before this, though, you know, I did a lot of drugs and alcohol. You know, it got me through a lot of hard times. It was really worked out well for me. I'm not advocating for it. I'm just saying it was really good for me. Let me tell you something. Did I get nominated for an Oscar? I couldn't believe it. I got nominated for an Oscar. So what I did was I took so many fucking Quaaludes and I drank so much, I was fucked up out of my mind. My manager at the time had to wash my hair. Couldn't even wash my fucking hair. Takes me to the Oscars. You know, we're at the Oscars, and I'm sitting in the chair, just fucking losing my mind. High, out of my mind, drunk. And then I realized, oh, my God, what if I win? I gotta walk up to the stage. Oh, no. Now I'm panicked. I look over, man. I was like, is it almost over? He goes, it's only been 40 minutes. We've still got another three hours to go. He goes, oh, no. Three hours. I can't handle it. And he was so paranoid. I was so paranoid about it. What if I win? I gotta walk on the stairs. I can't walk. It's impossible. I can't even stand up. How am I gonna go give a speech? It's not gonna work out. And it comes up. Our category finally comes up, and I go, the winner is Jack Lemmon. And I fucking celebrated. You know, I was so fucking happy. And the next day in the papers, they were like, look how beautiful Al Pacino is. What a great supporter of art supporting Jack Lemmon. And I was just happy I didn't fucking win and have to walk up on a goddamn stage hysterical. And then he goes, okay, I'll read from the paper. Now, since the baby was, like, right there. That was a great experience.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, that's rap. But it seems like the show's wrapped up.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah. Yes. Look, you get as many swings as you can, and you don't know how many you're gonna get. So I feel sincerely this second season is like a masterpiece. I feel like the eighth episode is something so unique. Chris Story gave me one of the sweetest compliments and he was just like, you did something really dangerous, but never inflammatory, which is an enormous feat. And it was tender, it was thoughtful, it was sweet, it was heartfelt, it was funny. And kudos to you. When he said that to me, I was like, thank you. I felt really seen because it was almost basically an impossible position to be in. Do you talk about October 7th? Do you have it? Do you get into it the season.

[Dax Shepard]

One wrap on October?

[Mo Amer]

No, season one didn't really have a particular date to it, but I decided to date the entire second season. So when it opens up in the first episode of season two, you could see it's September 2022 and then it takes us all the way to October of 23. But then the whole season ends on the 6th of October in Tel Aviv airport before their strip search. So I did that very deliberately because every time I started. First of all, if we talk about it, then that means the family doesn't get to go back. Obviously they can't go back and visit if there's a war going on. Not going to happen. Secondly, you're making everything seem like it all started at that point, which is also not fair. And people need to know contextually what the world looked like before that. Thirdly, every time I started getting into it, it became a full blown Dr. And the base of the show is comedy. And we explored it. I wanted to see what it looked like. I'd do a gut check. Right away I was like, does not feel good. That's not it. You only have two seasons. This is the best foot forward here. And if there's a scenario where a third comes around or the question comes up, do you want to do it? Do you want to get into it? I'd have to really think about it because I genuinely believe I'm being objective. Sincerely. The first season was really, really hard and I'm blessed that we able to get all the accolades we did for the first season. But what I was able to pull off with second season, I feel so blessed that I had such a great support system wife, my having a son at the same time being so focused on nothing else and just so zoned in about making sure to tell the best possible story. And I feel like we did that. I'm so relieved, you know what I mean? Because it is an impossible position.

[Dax Shepard]

A lot of opportunity for failure.

[Mo Amer]

Exactly.

[Dax Shepard]

Whenever you take on something that has about 90 ways it can go bad and then a couple good.

[Mo Amer]

We're also people who have their own projections on the subject matter, which is everyone. Exactly. Which is immigration, Latinos. It's not just a Palestinian family. Represents many different buckets. Right. We go into a detention center in episode two. I've never seen that in any show, much less a comedy. But also telling these detailed stories showing also how privileged I am as a refugee in comparison to other people's experiences.

[Dax Shepard]

Another guy's talking about cartel apprehending them.

[Mo Amer]

For four days, and he's like, how'd you get here? Like, well, I took a bus, and then I took a short feel. Or like, you know, in the 90s, we fled the Gulf War, you know, then we took a flight. I think it was delta. So just showing how absurd even I am in my own scenario. And I just love that misdirection of, like, you think it's going to be a hypersexual comedic situation, and then it goes into a political conversation, which things do, especially in that environment.

[Dax Shepard]

I would put the mask on.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah. I wouldn't. I couldn't do it. If anybody else in the room have performance anxiety. For sure. Any sexual activity. For sure.

[Dax Shepard]

Ambassador wants him to fuck his wife.

[Mo Amer]

With a luchador mask. Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Luchador mask.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah. Palestino. To do it.

[Dax Shepard]

He doesn't want to do it. I was like, oh, that would have been easy.

[Mo Amer]

I physically can't do it at all. So I was genuinely me. I know you told the line between the character of myself, but I remember having, like, a girlfriend, and she had this dog, and he kept looking at me while we're. I was like, dude, stop looking. I was like, I can't. You got to get this dog out of here, bro. It's making me feel terrible about myself.

[Dax Shepard]

Our old dog, she loved to watch.

[Mo Amer]

More than so shy, bro. I'm telling you, I'm super shy. Even if it's a pet.

[Monica Padman]

A loved one.

[Mo Amer]

Yes. Like, bro, what are you doing?

[Dax Shepard]

But our dog Lola didn't just want to observe. She wanted to, like, walk around and get a little closer. Sometimes I feel fur on my leg.

[Mo Amer]

No, come on.

[Dax Shepard]

And then I was like, lola's a fucking pervert. And I was like, wait, is that what's going on? Or when Lola looks at me, I feel like a pervert. I'm aware of how perverted I am with this third person.

[Mo Amer]

I'm really sad we brought this up now. No, it was fun. To play with that.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, so now you're on tour, and.

[Mo Amer]

The name of your tour is El Oso Palestino Tour. The Palestinian Bear Tour.

[Dax Shepard]

The Palestinian Bear, which is a play.

[Mo Amer]

On the character in the show. It's just side jobs to make a living in Mexico. He's a luchador, but he's really just there to get his ass kicked. He doesn't have any skill set whatsoever. I did a few of those takes, bro. That shit is real, man. It hurt like a motherfucker. My back went out a few times like, dude, what is going on? They're like, hold on to the rope. Squeeze your abs, and then we're gonna hold you from your ankles, but you gotta hold. Hold yourself. I'm like, I'm not planking. It's an extraordinary plank. I could plank for several minutes. Shockingly, I can do it.

[Dax Shepard]

I do want to offend you. I knew you were a good planker.

[Mo Amer]

You can't tell on Facebook.

[Dax Shepard]

No, we already know about the athleticism.

[Mo Amer]

You're a good planker. Thank you. I appreciate it. Gracias. For real. It's a female. He's, like, kicking my ass, and I'm like, bro, this is it. Where's the stunt guy? Get him in there. I thought this was gonna be fun. This was disaster. Get me out of the suit. It's hot. I'm sweating. I did black Adam. I can do my own stunts. Let's go. No, I can' I can't do all of them.

[Dax Shepard]

That's not your lane.

[Mo Amer]

Driving a car like a lunatic and getting thrown from the ropes are completely different things, buddy. Yeah, completely different things.

[Dax Shepard]

So how many dates are you doing?

[Mo Amer]

I think I've done 45 already. I'm not sure. You can get tickets on my website. Mohammer.com M O A M E R dot com. You follow me on Instagram. I gotta film another special, so I'm just going hard. I want this to be spectacular. I want it to be the best special that I've ever done. And I feel like, with getting older, having a son, and what's going on in the world, the way you filter things, and when you see things, everything is different. I see things really differently as a father, as a man, just coming off of season two itself and how really massive lift that was and relief of seeing people, the reception that I'm getting on the road now, it's one of the most beautiful things.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

How is your Instagram? Because Instagram is. Well, social media is a cesspool.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah, really? It really is. It's tough.

[Monica Padman]

It's tough. Do you face a lot of backlash and weird stuff there?

[Mo Amer]

I try not to look, number one. I really, really avoid it. I have a team that curates. I approve everything because I really don't want to spend my days online and on social. It was so time consuming and vacuous and everyone's just yelling at each other. No one's really making sense. There's no actual progress being made.

[Dax Shepard]

It's just people declaring what side of every fight they're on.

[Mo Amer]

Exactly. And then the worst part of it to me is no one's listening to one. So you're talking and I'm just thinking about how I'm going to respond.

[Dax Shepard]

You're not there to learn anything. You're there to broadcast your position and to fight.

[Mo Amer]

Exactly. So I've avoided that. And sincerely, I haven't had any issue like with season two. I think that the balance was perfect and the fact that it was based off of my actual experience in life and that you could see. Not all of it. Surely you fictionalize certain things, but a substantial amount of it is copy paste what the divine is giving me on a silver platter. You don't want to mess with that. You can't write anything better than that.

[Dax Shepard]

You're holding the camcorder.

[Mo Amer]

Just go with that and build around it and making sure to expand it and make sure it flows into the overall story. And that's it. Stay focused and have the right balance of comedy and drama and emotion tapped into it and take people on this ride and let it do the talking.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, not to be too corny and make you uncomfortable, I appreciate it so much. Rami, for me, was the first big. Like, I really, really enjoyed almost being forced to see what the experience is like.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And same with you. And so I'm grateful we live in this. The negative would be like a niche economy of content. But the great part of it is I get to watch Atlanta.

[Mo Amer]

It's a great era. I hope the pressure doesn't stop these stories from being told. Yeah, that's the scary part is that a lot of people at my shows were like, how'd they let you do it? One guy said, how are you alive? I was like, bro, pray for me. What the fuck are you talking about? How about life is a good sweet. Honestly, that's how shocked people are because that's how extreme the suppression of free speech has become. And if we don't like what you're saying, then we can just literally deport you to another country, like, what the fuck is going on right now?

[Monica Padman]

I know.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah, I don't really worry about it, but I just hope that it doesn't happen. I hope that the artist community specifically here in LA and Hollywood, they understand, like, we need more of these stories. You can't suppress speech if you don't like what somebody's saying. You just need more speech. Right?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, exactly.

[Mo Amer]

You don't need less. Everybody gets to shit. Share their stories. You don't have to love it, you don't have to hate it. You can appreciate it.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Well, have fun touring and then also act more, because I love watching you act. You really are just born to do it. You're so effortlessly comfortable. Mo, I'm delighted to meet you. I'm so glad you came and did this.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah. So I'll get to know both you. Really, truly. This is so fun.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, good.

[Mo Amer]

I really, really. What a great experience. I'm gonna do this in my garage.

[Dax Shepard]

You should.

[Monica Padman]

You really.

[Dax Shepard]

You got a garage?

[Mo Amer]

Just me just sitting there.

[Dax Shepard]

All you need is a garage.

[Mo Amer]

All right, brother. Thank you so much.

[Dax Shepard]

He is an armchair expert, but he makes mistakes all the time. Thank God Monica's here. She's gotta let him have the facts. Oh, this is fun.

[Monica Padman]

This is.

[Dax Shepard]

So you hit me with an idea.

[Monica Padman]

Yep.

[Dax Shepard]

Which is after we chit chat for a while and we get into the facts. I'm going to cut your hair. While you read the facts?

[Monica Padman]

Yes. Because you have boasted many a time about your haircutting capabilities.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

And I've never experienced it. And I need a haircut so badly.

[Dax Shepard]

I know, but I told you, this is not the situation. Like, I need you on a tall chair in the kitchen with a lot of light, and we got to discuss what you want. But you. What you're telling me is you just want the ends trimmed.

[Monica Padman]

I mean, you can do some other stuff if you want.

[Dax Shepard]

Just some big new layers.

[Monica Padman]

Be careful, but you can play with it a little bit.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. Okay, we'll see. We'll see what we can do.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

But I do have my tools. I got my tools.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, you got your scissors and your brush.

[Dax Shepard]

Like, normally I would use this comb, but I was thinking your hair. I don't know if I can get this comb through your hair. Can I?

[Monica Padman]

So have you ever.

[Dax Shepard]

I brought one of the girl's brushes.

[Monica Padman]

Have you ever cut hair on a podcast? Indian. On an Indian woman's head?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, I only do Indian women's.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, then you'll. Then you'll be fine. You'll be fine. With that comb, doll.

[Dax Shepard]

Think all Indian women have the same hair? I mean, they seem to. From my point of view, it seems pretty similar.

[Monica Padman]

I don't think they're exactly the same, but, yes, I think there's a thickness, yeah. Although Matt once told me. Matt, our friend, who's a hairstylist, told me that the actual strand itself is. Of. Mine is not that thick. It's more like medium.

[Dax Shepard]

It's the density.

[Monica Padman]

There's a lot of it.

[Dax Shepard]

So. Density.

[Monica Padman]

Density, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I've never seen a blonde Indian. Let's start there.

[Monica Padman]

No, they don't.

[Dax Shepard]

No, it's like green eyes. Cat eyes, as your father would say.

[Monica Padman]

Well, green eyes happens there sometimes. But no blonde hair.

[Dax Shepard]

No. Right.

[Monica Padman]

No, I've never heard of it.

[Dax Shepard]

There's got to be albino Indians.

[Monica Padman]

Well, exactly. That would be the. That would be the only Albinism.

[Dax Shepard]

We learned a cool word today on Armchair Anonymous.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Edenistic.

[Monica Padman]

No, Edenic.

[Dax Shepard]

Edenic, yeah.

[Monica Padman]

And it.

[Dax Shepard]

To describe an environment as Eden, like. Like the Garden of Eden.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, I liked that.

[Dax Shepard]

God, I'm glad you remembered it, because I had. I said out loud, I'm going to commit that to my repertoire.

[Monica Padman]

Repertoire.

[Dax Shepard]

People love your David Chang story. I just want to add that I looked at the comments and people. Many people write, this is all of us.

[Monica Padman]

It's all of us. Right. We just don't know how to operate in the world. Humans do not know how to operate.

[Dax Shepard]

We get so nervous, as if, like, people get punctured, punched for doing it wrong or something.

[Monica Padman]

I did send it to Cali, of course. I sent her the text. She said, what is going on? And I responded and she said, but where is the bread from? Oh, we still don't know. A really important.

[Dax Shepard]

Rob can. Yeah, I'll ask. He'll handle that right now.

[Monica Padman]

Can you find out the bread that.

[Dax Shepard]

His children didn't eat that he brought home for his children?

[Monica Padman]

I was gonna say, oh, what you got there about.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, there's a bit of a standoff in our household. So, Chris, Kristen, as you know, you've tried it. She's in her sourdough phase.

[Monica Padman]

I've never tried her.

[Dax Shepard]

You haven't?

[Monica Padman]

Only Amy's.

[Dax Shepard]

What about at Molly's birthday party? She brought over, like, two fresh loaves. You didn't get into it? I had some. I cheated. And I also. I was like, you know, I already told you this. I'm like, oh, sourdough's got the least amount of gluten. I can eat it. And I had it. There's Nothing better than sourdough out of an oven. Forget it. But anyways, my kids are like, where's the white bread?

[Monica Padman]

They miss the white bread and goes.

[Dax Shepard]

Like, I'm making the bread. You have homemade bread, right? Rightly so.

[Monica Padman]

Right.

[Dax Shepard]

And Delta's like, I want. I want little, square white pieces of bread. And I get it.

[Monica Padman]

You definitely get it. Of all people.

[Dax Shepard]

Because I'm a trash monster. I like crappy stuff.

[Monica Padman]

No, when you have your. You have your five dishes that you make that you used to make. Those were your special dishes. And one of them is a tuna salad sandwich. Excuse me. A chicken salad. It's been a minute. I haven't had it in a while. Chicken.

[Dax Shepard]

That one's hard because I don't eat bread anymore. And I gotta just eat this and watch you guys.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, well, you can have it on this sourdough, I guess. How often are you cheating with this?

[Dax Shepard]

I'm not. When she got into the face, because you can't imagine waking up and the whole house smells like a loaf of sourdough. Like, it's actually now maddening that I. I don't. I had a week of it. I'm like, yeah, this is where it's not working. My skin sort of, like, aching. My wrist started hurting.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I also gained, like, immediately. I just mysteriously gained, like, eight pounds.

[Monica Padman]

Sure. Well, we.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, go ahead. We. What do we talk about? That I gain and lose weight really quick?

[Monica Padman]

No, that, like, I think you're just underweight. Like, your body wants to weigh more. So of course it's like getting something and it's gonna hoard it.

[Dax Shepard]

I don't know if you inception me, but I've been eating more.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm not sure is it that or.

[Monica Padman]

Is it that you're. You got back from New York and you had all this yummy food, and now you want yummy food.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, then I got back down to 194.

[Monica Padman]

Right.

[Dax Shepard]

And then I think vanity. I'm like, I don't like my face at 194.

[Monica Padman]

No, maybe you are having, you know how they call them sympathy pains when a woman is pregnant and then the man also experiences pains.

[Dax Shepard]

You know, I gained a crazy, crazy amount of weight when Kristen was pregnant the first time.

[Monica Padman]

And you said that was, like, sympathy weight or something.

[Dax Shepard]

I just don't know what it was. But I find that every man I know has done that when there was.

[Monica Padman]

Because, like, the woman is eating more.

[Dax Shepard]

I think she's, like, driving it a little more because she's got these Weird urges and there's more around, and maybe that's part of it. And maybe you are like, you know, like, if you. I want people to think about this. The next time time you're at a booth at a restaurant talking with somebody, start paying attention. How you inadvertently mirror each other's body language. If someone puts their hand on their. Rest their. Their face on their fist, you'll do it. Just be aware of it.

[Monica Padman]

I mean, we don't.

[Dax Shepard]

In here.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I wonder if we were at a booth at a restaurant, we would.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, thanks.

[Dax Shepard]

We had an expert on saying something about dad bod that, like, the. The husband or the father stores bod fat differently in his body when his wife's pregnant. Oh. Knowing that he's not gonna sleep and. Oh, interesting. But my big thing was we were at one of the checkups, and I just hadn't been on a scale in, like, four or five months. When I got on, I was like, oh, my God, I've gained 22 pounds and I didn't even notice.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, I think it's maybe more that. Like, she's eating more.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, yeah.

[Monica Padman]

There's more on her plate. Literally.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

So then you're just matching that.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Something happens. It's pretty consistent.

[Monica Padman]

You might be having sympathy weight. Weight gain from us all being on our periods.

[Dax Shepard]

Could be. That's a good story, Whiskers.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, okay. Oh, no, don't. This is.

[Dax Shepard]

Yes, of course. This is a good story for whiskey. No, I don't need to say who.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, okay.

[Dax Shepard]

I mean, why is it embarrassing to have a period?

[Monica Padman]

I'd be embarrassed.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

I be embarrassed by that story.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, okay. I don't think she would, but I won't risk it.

[Monica Padman]

Well, there's a woman, but there's only.

[Dax Shepard]

There's a lot of women in my house. Nicole's there nonstop. My sister's there nonstop. I got. Kristen's there nonstop. This is a bevy of urine and out of there.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. It's not me.

[Dax Shepard]

I have some tampons in those trash cans for sure.

[Monica Padman]

Maybe years ago. I don't really use tampons anymore.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, you're over it.

[Monica Padman]

I use period underwear.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. That's the rage I use.

[Monica Padman]

And there's a lot of rages. People use the cup.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. We talk about this. You don't. You're empty.

[Monica Padman]

I'm just afraid of it. I'm not anti.

[Dax Shepard]

And we have a friend. We won't outer, but we have a friend in the pod that uses the diva cup.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. And she also told us A story of someone she knows. She was at a wedding and a girl's popped it, you know, pop and locked.

[Dax Shepard]

She was dancing. She was dancing and the cup spilled.

[Monica Padman]

It fell out and on the blood flew everywhere.

[Dax Shepard]

How does the cup pass your underpants?

[Monica Padman]

She wasn't wearing any.

[Dax Shepard]

What a kinky broad. She's on her period, not wearing undies. And on the dance floor, popping and locking.

[Mo Amer]

Who. Who is this woman?

[Dax Shepard]

Do I know her?

[Monica Padman]

No. If you're able. I mean, it's like suctioned up there. You should be able to.

[Dax Shepard]

You should be able to go underwearless to a wedding.

[Monica Padman]

I mean, technically, I. I'm sure when I.

[Dax Shepard]

You don't think if I did something like that, you'd be like. That's so arrogant. You know you would.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, I would say that. But listen, I have. I'm sure at some point in life when I was wearing tampons. Wore a tampon without an underwear. Oh, definitely. Like at a. At a. On. In a bathing suit.

[Dax Shepard]

But your bathing suits, the underwear.

[Mo Amer]

You're not.

[Dax Shepard]

Not wearing underwear ever.

[Mo Amer]

No, but.

[Dax Shepard]

And then add. Then you're on your period and you decide that's when you're going to not wear your underwear.

[Monica Padman]

Let me tell you why. If you're wearing a certain dress, like let's say you're going to a wedding or something, and you're wearing a certain dress and you don't want underwear lines. You'd go.

[Dax Shepard]

Even in the day of the thong and everything. That's still.

[Monica Padman]

Even still. Depending. I mean, there are some good underwears that you can use, but there are certain dresses, like, you can just see it. So there are times that go to more weddings. There are times that I haven't worn underwear.

[Dax Shepard]

You raw dog it.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. And then.

[Dax Shepard]

No, commando.

[Monica Padman]

I commando. And if I'm on my period period, it. That's a tampon. And I'm not worried.

[Dax Shepard]

Can you think of a specific time ever? Like, this sounds so theoretical. Can you tell me a time you were on your period, put a tampon and went out of the house with a dress on and no underwear?

[Monica Padman]

Is that a real period for. I mean. I mean, since I was 11 or 12.

[Dax Shepard]

You got it at 11 or 12.

[Monica Padman]

I forget.

[Dax Shepard]

You live next to a nuclear reactor.

[Monica Padman]

No, I was an early bloomer.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Mo Amer]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

And anyway, I have been on it for a really long time. And then I like, I know the feeling of what it is to have a tampon in. And not have underwear in your house.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm asking. Can you think of. Are you telling Me, right now. You have a memory of going out on a dress?

[Monica Padman]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

No undies on your period?

[Monica Padman]

Yes, I have a sense memory of it. I don't have an actual memory of it, but I have a sense of friends.

[Dax Shepard]

Dax, we have a commitment to each other here.

[Monica Padman]

Exactly.

[Dax Shepard]

To be honest, you can't believe each other. You can't feel like you did. You'd either you gotta say, I did or I didn't.

[Monica Padman]

That's not fair.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, I apologize.

[Monica Padman]

Listen, I remember I wore a dress sort of recently, that I didn't wear underwear. I do know that. And I kind of feel like I was on my period. Did that.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

And I think I wore a tampon, specifically because I don't really wear tampons anymore. And I remember I had to wear it.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Because it's weird.

[Dax Shepard]

It's weird to say wear it.

[Monica Padman]

I know.

[Dax Shepard]

Wear a tampon.

[Monica Padman]

I had to put one in.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Plug. Plug.

[Monica Padman]

I was. I will. I would never be worried about popping and locking and the tampon falling out.

[Dax Shepard]

No, of course. Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

So I can see why. The Diva Cup. You wouldn't.

[Dax Shepard]

I have no experience with it, but it seems crazy. There's a cup in there that's relying on a suction seal and that. That seal couldn't break anyone who's ever used any suction cups.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, they're wi. More. It's like. I think it's, like, big. So. So the fact that the whole thing is up there, it does feel like a teacup. Like, kind of, I think, but rubbery, I think.

[Dax Shepard]

But as big as. Like a coffee cup.

[Monica Padman]

No, not a.

[Mo Amer]

It's like a golf ball, maybe.

[Monica Padman]

No, bigger than that.

[Dax Shepard]

Much bigger than a golf ball.

[Mo Amer]

Natalie.

[Dax Shepard]

Natalie uses them.

[Monica Padman]

She does?

[Mo Amer]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Your dog ever eaten it?

[Mo Amer]

No.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, well, let me get to the story.

[Monica Padman]

Okay, fine. Tell the story.

[Dax Shepard]

There's a lot of updates on Whiskey.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

A new update on Whiskey is he's a bad to the bone. That doesn't help me because it needs to be next to a Bic lighter or something.

[Monica Padman]

Here it is next to a micro penis. A tampon.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, okay. So it's the same length as a Tampax. Okay, so Whiskey gives you to know some updates about Whiskey. Okay, One thing is he's bad to the bone.

[Mo Amer]

Okay?

[Dax Shepard]

He's killed over a hundred men.

[Monica Padman]

What are you talking about?

[Dax Shepard]

Whiskey's eaten 100 men. He's bad to the bone.

[Monica Padman]

Okay, you just really want to say bad to the bone.

[Dax Shepard]

Like, I wanted to tell you about Whiskey.

[Monica Padman]

I know.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, you know, first of all, he was trim, and he was president of the hallway.

[Monica Padman]

Right.

[Dax Shepard]

And I wanted to tell you about that, and you seem to enjoy that.

[Monica Padman]

No, I want to hear about Whiskey. And I. I know he's bad to the bone.

[Dax Shepard]

He's. He's eating 100 men and 150 women, but he doesn't talk about that.

[Monica Padman]

He's sounding kind of like.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, so he's bad to the bone.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

And someone in my household put a tampon in the trash can, which is advisable for your plumbing.

[Monica Padman]

Correct.

[Dax Shepard]

So I'm on a high five. This unnamed person who put a tampon because whiskey's bad to the bone. He loves blood.

[Monica Padman]

Ew.

[Dax Shepard]

He went and ate the tampon. Okay.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Then. And I am get. She won't mind this. I just want you know she won't mind this. And this is a big honorable mention, because this. I've said this before. My sister Carly is down when shit needs. When the gnarly stuff needs to get done. My sister will do it.

[Monica Padman]

She will.

[Dax Shepard]

She is. She's fearless. So they were taking Whiskey back to the bone to On a walk, and he pooped out half a tampon.

[Monica Padman]

Yep.

[Dax Shepard]

And then a little while longer, he pooped out, tried to poop out the rest of the tampon. And now the cord, the string, the rope.

[Monica Padman]

Oh.

[Dax Shepard]

And now he's got a rope hanging out of his butt. And he's a bastard. Right. So you can't get close to him.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, he'll bite. He'll bite you.

[Dax Shepard]

He'll eat you like the 100 men he's eaten. And so Carly's trying to get this thing out of his butt, and he's trying to bite her. And this whole thing, it's a battle. Then I guess she had to take him to her house and put him in the sink and get him warm water on him, because he calms down when he gets a battle.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, my God.

[Dax Shepard]

And then she had to pull this thing out of him. These dogs, man.

[Monica Padman]

You are so lucky that your sister. Sister did that because he would have died of tss.

[Mo Amer]

That's what.

[Dax Shepard]

That's what Kristen goes.

[Mo Amer]

I.

[Dax Shepard]

Is he gonna get toxic shock syndrome? I'm like, no, Your butt is so different than your vagina. No.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, maybe. Hit. Hit. We don't know about you proctologist on.

[Dax Shepard]

I don't think you can get toxic shock syndrome in your butthole from a Tampax.

[Monica Padman]

You can, and it's a tampon.

[Dax Shepard]

Tampax is the brand I approved.

[Mo Amer]

Prefer.

[Dax Shepard]

Kind of like. I like Huggies. Tampax Radiant. They always man these ad campaigns and I. I tip my hat to them because what a product to have to sell on tv. And, you know, they have these commercials and someone's like, sailing. They like to put you like in a nautical situation.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. Because you. That's when you need a tampon. When you're in a bathing suit. That's why.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. This was more, I think, like, oh, it's going to be a long sailboat. Right. I don't know. It's always like someone's in a field and there's a lot of flowers. Like they're trying of destigmatize. I guess it keep whiskey away. But yeah, they got to name it. Whatever name. I just Radiant or something. I just. I think they have their work cut out for them and I applaud them.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, yeah, I get it.

[Dax Shepard]

God bless them. Well, you got to sell Depends.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Hard product to sell.

[Monica Padman]

In some ways it's a hard product. In some ways it sells itself because, like. Well, yeah, you need it.

[Dax Shepard]

You need them.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

You know, one's on the fence about getting Depends. Or you either need Depends or you don't.

[Monica Padman]

Well, maybe that's why tampons have had to step up their game because there are competing period underwear.

[Dax Shepard]

I don't like the. The branding of this.

[Monica Padman]

Why do you like it?

[Dax Shepard]

Period underwear.

[Monica Padman]

I mean, that's what I call it.

[Dax Shepard]

Grab my period underwear. Don't you think there's a, like. I think the Tampax people should take a stab at period underwear, because I think they could top it. Well, it's not all like, freedom panties or something.

[Monica Padman]

Let me finish.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, sorry. So excited to talk about female products.

[Monica Padman]

I know. It's. It's. There are brands. Nyx. Nyx is a brand. So you don't. You don't have to say pen, period under where you can say, like, my Nixies. Sure. Nixies. Regular nicks.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. It already starts with an X, so I love it.

[Monica Padman]

Is it N I X and then there's.

[Dax Shepard]

Or is it N I, C, K.

[Monica Padman]

S, K, N I X. Oh, great.

[Dax Shepard]

K, N, I. So like knitting.

[Monica Padman]

And then there's Thinx. That's a huge brand.

[Dax Shepard]

Another ax.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

That's a trusted letter in the vaginal space.

[Monica Padman]

It is. Maybe they are steal. Not stealing. Maybe they are inspired buy. They're building upon the tampons.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. The trusted. The trust that these people have tirelessly built with this product. That is.

[Monica Padman]

You know, this is. Look, nothing against the tampon industry, but this is better for you.

[Dax Shepard]

If I was in the ad game, I would want to get put on Tampax because you want to bite off a lot, you know, like, you want to challenge. It's like, if you're an actor, you want to play someone dying of something or whatever, you know, you want a challenge. And I would like, I think, to cut my teeth and make a name for myself. I'd love to just, like, blow out a Tampax campaign.

[Monica Padman]

Okay, how are you going to get these people back on tampons? The people that have left to the.

[Dax Shepard]

You want me to just, like, right off the cuff?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. You're in a meeting right now. Here we are, guys. Our sales are plummeting.

[Dax Shepard]

And why?

[Monica Padman]

Because there's all these competing trends now that, look, I hate to say, say. And this doesn't leave this room. They're better for the women's bodies.

[Dax Shepard]

Wait, nothing is better. What if you're sailing the cup you're supposed to carry? What you're trying to tell me is a woman on in her cycle is supposed to have a purse full of underwear.

[Monica Padman]

No, they'd use.

[Dax Shepard]

That's not a move for an elegant lady out on the town.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, see, this is the fact that.

[Dax Shepard]

You got to carry extra undies with you.

[Monica Padman]

What are you talking about?

[Dax Shepard]

Well, once you've. Once you've soiled your necks just like a tampon, you got to change it.

[Monica Padman]

Well, no.

[Dax Shepard]

So you got to change these onions.

[Monica Padman]

No, you wash it.

[Mo Amer]

You.

[Monica Padman]

You. You technically rinse it out.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Oh, yeah. This is. I got a lot to work with here.

[Monica Padman]

But also, the cup is different.

[Dax Shepard]

Are you. Forget the cup. We're talking.

[Monica Padman]

Well, that's a huge thing.

[Dax Shepard]

This is Tampax versus underpants.

[Monica Padman]

Okay, fine.

[Dax Shepard]

Are you trying to tell me that the day you get your period, you put on a pair of necks and you leave them on for the duration? Okay, great.

[Monica Padman]

But I leave mine on all day.

[Dax Shepard]

Even a very heavy, heavy day. I want to be. Choose my words carefully.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, I do. My flow, at its heaviest, one can sustain it.

[Dax Shepard]

What if you go on a sailboat?

[Monica Padman]

Then I'm wearing a tampon.

[Dax Shepard]

Bingo. So we build on that for the. For the adventurer. For the person engaged.

[Monica Padman]

Sure.

[Dax Shepard]

If you're a couch potato, wear nicks. If you want to get out and see the world. If you don't want your period to keep you sidelined on the bench, you still want to go sailing and go to amusement parks, there's only one brand for you. Because you can carry extras in your purse discreetly, like an elegant lady.

[Monica Padman]

Ew. I.

[Dax Shepard]

No one wants to have no one. You know what I would do is I would have. Thank you, Monica. Here we go. I got my pitch. Okay, We're. We start the commercial with a woman in line at an amusement park. Everyone's having a great time. Her child asks her for a sucker. She goes in her purse to get it. The purse comes dislodged and on the ground tumbles five pairs of underpants. She's mortified. And then a girl next to her looks at her purse and she's got Tampax in there. And then she winks. Pretty good spot. No one wants underwear to tumble out of their bag.

[Monica Padman]

I would.

[Dax Shepard]

At the Amusement Park 100.

[Monica Padman]

No one wants tampons to fly everywhere.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, they want it because they're not humongous.

[Mo Amer]

Like.

[Monica Padman]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

Like underpants.

[Monica Padman]

Or if they think it's a no. Men. All the men off of this campaign immediately. This is so embarrassing and bad. Absolutely not. Absolutely not. Every woman has been in a situation where a tank. Tampons falling out. And it's like the most mortifying. It is so upsetting.

[Dax Shepard]

What would be.

[Monica Padman]

Pond falls out of your backpack.

[Dax Shepard]

I want you to be. Please be honest.

[Monica Padman]

I am.

[Dax Shepard]

You get to choose.

[Monica Padman]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

You're. You're on a date with this unnamed guy that was at Saturday Live. And your purse falls over in either a gigantic pair of underwear. Fallout. Because they're big, right? To cover everything.

[Monica Padman]

Hold on.

[Dax Shepard]

Am I imagining seeing them correctly?

[Monica Padman]

We're not. Okay. I need to take a break.

[Mo Amer]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Call time.

[Monica Padman]

As we've established, I am currently on my period.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. So where are you keeping all these other underwear?

[Monica Padman]

Exactly where do you see? There's no. I'm not carrying any underwear. There's no underwear in my bag. You don't.

[Dax Shepard]

I think you're reckless. I think you need a backup pair on you. I'm not going to say who. I know. I know someone who wears them. And they. They go through a couple of days.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, sure. Some people do.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Same as your tamper.

[Dax Shepard]

So that person has to carry an extra pair of these grundles around. Okay. Okay. So we just concede the fact that someone might need to be carrying grundles with them. Now, my question is your purse falls over at dinner on a date with a boy you like in either a very large pair of underwear.

[Monica Padman]

Fallout that they're very. They're not as big as you think. You think they're diapers? They're. They're not diapes.

[Dax Shepard]

That's another great angle. I'll start calling them diapes.

[Monica Padman]

No, stop. Okay, listen.

[Dax Shepard]

I never know when the fun's gonna end.

[Monica Padman]

Listen, I've put up with a lot here. Okay?

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

If this man would rather me get. Tss, slash, have to put cloth up my pussy.

[Dax Shepard]

Save cotton. Please don't use that word in the campaign. That's off putting one of the concerns.

[Mo Amer]

See.

[Dax Shepard]

Or no. No. That word doesn't work in advertising as much as I wish it did.

[Monica Padman]

Thank you for explaining that to me. If. If this man, this hot man who I think is kind and nice.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

And from another country. This man is.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, that's. You're giving away a lot of clues.

[Monica Padman]

I think this man from another country really understands that.

[Dax Shepard]

You better find out.

[Monica Padman]

Americans are crazy.

[Dax Shepard]

That other countries a lot more buttoned up than this country.

[Monica Padman]

No. But not in this type of area.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, yes.

[Monica Padman]

No.

[Dax Shepard]

Yes.

[Monica Padman]

Tax. You don't know what it's like to be a woman.

[Dax Shepard]

I know I don't. But I do know the difference between. I won't say the name of the country in our country and we are much more foul.

[Monica Padman]

Not in the female hygienic space.

[Dax Shepard]

Guys. There are like about everything.

[Monica Padman]

No. But in general, I, I. They wear more pads there. Okay.

[Mo Amer]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

So. So the, the answer. Your answer is.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Lock in the answer. You'd rather have a big pair of underwear fallout than a tampon.

[Monica Padman]

No, that's. I want to get a little more nuanced. I wouldn't. And stop saying big pair of underwear.

[Dax Shepard]

They're bigger than the ones you normally wear. They're not like there's a pair you'd be happy to fall out. Right. We agree on that.

[Monica Padman]

Listen, I'm currently wearing.

[Dax Shepard]

Huh?

[Monica Padman]

A thong period underwear.

[Mo Amer]

Oh.

[Monica Padman]

This is what I'm saying. You don't understand.

[Dax Shepard]

I haven't seen that product. I've seen different versions.

[Monica Padman]

Yes. And it looks. It has lace.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, wow.

[Monica Padman]

It looks like underwear.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. Okay.

[Monica Padman]

Hot underwear.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, great.

[Monica Padman]

Now what I wouldn't want to happen. I will say. I will say this. What I would not want to happen is my bag falls out dirty period Underwear falls out. That now.

[Dax Shepard]

And be honest. You're not going to pitch him in the trash can when you switch. No grundles in the turlet. So yeah. There's. You could be in a situation where you're carrying.

[Monica Padman]

I'm personally not though, so I can't.

[Dax Shepard]

But for the person who does have to change midday, they have to carry that around. So. Okay. They clearly now they also have to carry a Ziploc bag. Great product. I wish I was on that campaign. I swear by Ziplocs. Now they have. Not only do they have this, you know.

[Mo Amer]

Go on.

[Dax Shepard]

A pair of underwear. I'll leave it at that.

[Monica Padman]

Thank you.

[Dax Shepard]

That are soiled.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

In a Ziploc bag. I mean, now this is a little. This is crazy. Cuz the guy who's not as in a feminist like me, who I already know about all these products.

[Mo Amer]

You don't.

[Dax Shepard]

But for the untrained guy, okay. He sees a pair of undies in a Ziploc bag. Monica. I'll tell you a thou thousand percent what he thinks happened. She herself.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

That's a Ziploc bag full of shitty underwear.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. And is it hot?

[Dax Shepard]

Well, now you're. Now you're. That's an interesting counter.

[Monica Padman]

See, now listen. This is what I. Yes. Would I rather a little tampon Delicate. It's not delicate.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Some inspiration. What was it called?

[Monica Padman]

Radiant.

[Dax Shepard]

Radiant. A radiant tampon falls out.

[Monica Padman]

Falls out. Yes. I would prefer that to dirty period underwear. Hang out at a restaurant in a Ziploc bag. Better in a Ziploc bag at least than on its own.

[Dax Shepard]

But it says they poop themselves.

[Monica Padman]

If that happened. The underwear. Ziploc bag slash regular stinky underwear.

[Dax Shepard]

When it happens.

[Monica Padman]

You. I would say that's embarrassing. That. Oh no. This is like David Chang all over again. No, I would address it. I would address it. I'd be like.

[Dax Shepard]

And there's flies to do. Just.

[Mo Amer]

There's.

[Dax Shepard]

Immediately there's a swarm. In fact, before he even sees it, he hears, whoa, is there a swarm? I heard a swarm of flies.

[Monica Padman]

No.

[Dax Shepard]

And then whiskey runs across the restroom.

[Monica Padman]

Oh my God. I would say I. I don't wear tampons anymore because they're not good for you.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh. And I. I'd say I'm so glad you're taking care of your.

[Mo Amer]

Yourself.

[Monica Padman]

Exactly. And that's the end of that.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Know what you think?

[Dax Shepard]

Well. Okay. Say that again.

[Monica Padman]

That's so embarrassed. I'm so embarrassed. I just don't wear tampons anymore because they're not great for you. For women's bodies.

[Dax Shepard]

And because you.

[Mo Amer]

Not.

[Dax Shepard]

You don't wear tampons anymore.

[Mo Amer]

You.

[Dax Shepard]

You had an act. You pooped your pants.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, no. Is that what you think? Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Because it's in Ziploc.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, no, no. Sorry, sorry. It's just. It's just period underwear. All.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm starving. Let's see the discernment.

[Monica Padman]

I hate men. All men off the campaign.

[Dax Shepard]

Now let's see what kind of appetizers they got. You're not can we have a can of Raid?

[Monica Padman]

Like you aren't having sex with people on their p. Oh, absolutely.

[Dax Shepard]

I love it. I love it.

[Monica Padman]

Police.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. One of my. Yeah, I'm going to leave that there. Yeah. Yes, of course. I don't give a. I also don't care if you have shitty underwear in your purse. But I do think I'm a rare. Rare customer.

[Monica Padman]

I think you're probably a rare customer.

[Dax Shepard]

But I would be like, oh, so glad your. Your pants. Now I gotta tell you about 25 stories.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. Look, it's tough.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, it's okay. Well, Mother's Day is right around the corner, so think about getting mom either of these options. Whatever you found to be a compelling. There's argument.

[Monica Padman]

We've said three now. Diva cup.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Underwear.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Choice is yours. If you're a pop and locker, you wear dresses. These are all things you got to consider. Yeah, they're great. I'm just having fun. I'm having a good time. And you were, too.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. So anyway, she pulled the tampon right out of there.

[Dax Shepard]

She's such a gangster. Car.

[Monica Padman]

And do you think there was now poop.

[Dax Shepard]

Let me honest. If I ever got in a situation where I. I had accidentally killed somebody and it was one of these scenarios where it's like, there's no way I can. My story's not gonna hold up. Like, literally, the choices are it was an accident. A. And my choices are call the police and go to prison forever. Cause it looks insane. Or get rid of the body and I can't do it myself. I do need one person.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

And Aaron's in Detroit.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, okay.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm calling Carly.

[Monica Padman]

I. That's.

[Dax Shepard]

That's the right call, right?

[Monica Padman]

I mean, I'm upset, obviously, but that's not your lane. Well, cleaning up bodies, cutting up a body. Oh, it's cutting up. I thought we were burying it or putting it in the ocean or something.

[Dax Shepard]

It's Robert Durst.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. Yeah, I'd rather not.

[Dax Shepard]

Right.

[Mo Amer]

You know, there's other calls.

[Monica Padman]

You'd rather I would keep it a secret?

[Dax Shepard]

Yes. I would trust you to tell you this happened.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

But I'm talking about the dirty business.

[Monica Padman]

I'm just also not very strong. Even though I've been doing my farmers carries intermittently. I did them last night.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, you did?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, good. While you were watching er.

[Monica Padman]

No, when I was going to and from. I just do a glass of wine kind of.

[Dax Shepard]

Do you ever do them on your way to get another glass of wine?

[Monica Padman]

They are like, right there. I mean, I can't say I haven't done them after a night out.

[Dax Shepard]

Sure. Well, of course. Because you're feeling stronger than you are. You're feeling, like, overly confident.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, I think I actually am ready, so. I've been doing two 40s.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

I think I might be ready to move up.

[Dax Shepard]

Good.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

But I'm. I told you, you're not going very far. How far are you supposed to go?

[Dax Shepard]

Longer than to your kitchen, probably.

[Monica Padman]

Well, I go back and forth until it feels like it's really falling out of my hand.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

You think that's bad?

[Dax Shepard]

I think you can look up. I want to say they're supposed to last either 30 seconds or a minute.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. I don't do them, so I don't. I don't know.

[Monica Padman]

All right, I'll look it up.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. You want to do facts and get a haircut?

[Monica Padman]

Oh, yeah, I do.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, great. Stay tuned for more Armchair Expert if you dare. Well, I'm just gonna start by saying this will be my first haircut I've ever given sitting down.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, really?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, you like to stand?

[Dax Shepard]

Well, if you. No one's ever cut your hair sitting you down, Right? This a crazy, huh? Yeah, but it's okay.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

All right, so first I'm going to start by grooming you.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. Don't forget to do the facts, though. That's also your job.

[Monica Padman]

For the listener, I already forgot.

[Dax Shepard]

Like, if you're watching, this will be fun even if you're not giving facts. But for the listener, you're going to have to give your facts.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. I just really like it when people brush my hair.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, I bet you probably never want the haircut to start. I can see why you want to trim. There's. Yeah, you have some strays.

[Monica Padman]

It's real. It's gotten really out of control.

[Dax Shepard]

And a lot of them are kind of mid level, so that's a little tricky.

[Monica Padman]

Those are the layers.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Well, okay, we're going to start. We're going to start at the bottom.

[Monica Padman]

Do you want me to do anything with my head?

[Dax Shepard]

No.

[Monica Padman]

Okay, great.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. Now the facts.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, tell me about the facts.

[Monica Padman]

Tell me when you're making your first cut.

[Dax Shepard]

I already did.

[Mo Amer]

Wow.

[Monica Padman]

Were you not scared? What happened?

[Dax Shepard]

I just cut myself.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, no.

[Dax Shepard]

You know why? I always. I cut like this, Monica. I cut like this. And because your hair is down here, I have to cut like this. And I just cut my finger. It's okay. We're going to continue on.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, God.

[Dax Shepard]

Get me one of Your Nyx. I'm going to wrap a Nyx around this, see how absorbent it is.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. Okay. Are you sure you're okay?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. Now this is from Mo.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, wonderful. Mo Hammer.

[Monica Padman]

Mo Ammer. This was a great episode. Really interesting life.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, incredible.

[Monica Padman]

We've had, we've had a few people on lately with really interesting lives.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. John.

[Monica Padman]

John Bernthal. Mo. That's it.

[Dax Shepard]

That's where it's pretty much it.

[Monica Padman]

Okay, now I have to check myself. I said that we had someone on Armchair Anonymous who told a story about how they pooped in the aisle of a plane and it got everywhere and it got on the flight attendant.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, I didn't remember that story when you told it, did that not check out?

[Monica Padman]

No, it happened. But it was the flight attendant called. It was flight attendant stories.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, okay. Okay, that makes more sense.

[Monica Padman]

Or plane stories or something. And she told it from her perspective. She's the one that got pooped on. Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

As if the job's not thankless enough already.

[Monica Padman]

I know it's one of your main defenders. Stick up force.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I enter, I enter the plane a little bit. Self fulfilling prophecy. I'm, I'm suspicious someone's going to try to be mean to them.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. You want it to happen really?

[Dax Shepard]

I don't but I'm, but I'm looking for it. And you find what you're looking for. That's like the best way to sum it up.

[Monica Padman]

How's it it going with the haircut?

[Dax Shepard]

Pretty good.

[Monica Padman]

Okay, great.

[Dax Shepard]

Bleeding? Pretty good. But that's okay.

[Monica Padman]

Oh my God.

[Dax Shepard]

It's okay. It's okay.

[Monica Padman]

Should we put the cot at some point?

[Dax Shepard]

I'll put, I'll put a, a band aid on it.

[Mo Amer]

For sure.

[Dax Shepard]

It's going to get a band aid.

[Monica Padman]

Okay, well do we want to cauterize.

[Dax Shepard]

It with a chemical cauterization?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, that we just learned about.

[Dax Shepard]

That we just learned about.

[Monica Padman]

That's an Easter egg farm chair Anonymous. And it's a dick.

[Dax Shepard]

It is a dick.

[Monica Padman]

Okay, we're. When do Michael Che and Colin Jost do their like swappy or they write.

[Dax Shepard]

Jokes for one another?

[Monica Padman]

Uhhuh. That happened at Christmas. They might do it more. But that was at Christmas.

[Dax Shepard]

Seems to be the Christmas present they give us.

[Monica Padman]

Yes. And then last time they did it they talked about Scarlet's vagina and caused.

[Dax Shepard]

A little bit of a.

[Monica Padman]

Caused some issues. Oh my God. Dax, hold on.

[Dax Shepard]

No, no, no, keep going. I just showed Monica at the blood, but it's okay. I just dabbed it and got a bunch of hair inside of it.

[Monica Padman]

Wait, everything's fine.

[Dax Shepard]

Do we want to get everything? No, everything's fine. Continue on. Nothing's happened.

[Monica Padman]

I'm nervous for you.

[Dax Shepard]

Don't be nervous.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

This is not my first time bleeding.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. But I caught.

[Dax Shepard]

I feel. I think, you know what happened. This is God smiting me for all the period talk. It's. Now he's given me a lot of blood. Well, her. Now we know God's a woman and she has smited me.

[Monica Padman]

You're right. It is a ding, ding, ding.

[Dax Shepard]

Wait, can we pause for one second? I am going to get a band because I'm going to have to pull out the layers a little bit.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, great.

[Monica Padman]

I might have it in my bed. Do you want me to go grab one?

[Dax Shepard]

Is Carly inside? She probably is. Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, I'll go grab one.

[Mo Amer]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

Be careful not to get any blood on your white shirt.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, I'll try not to get blood on my wife.

[Monica Padman]

Are you. You so far happy with the cut?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. I mean, no. We're just. We're just.

[Monica Padman]

No, because we just started. Okay. Okay. Okay. Don't be up. Don't get upset. Okay. Now, why shouldn't adults get their tonsils removed? They will experience more pain and slower healing compared to children, and there's a higher chance of complications like bleeding or infection.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, I am gonna have to get your hair. Your hair's gonna look crazy in this interview.

[Monica Padman]

Great.

[Dax Shepard]

Or not interview, but fact check, because I'm gonna have to flop over the. The layers over the back of your head.

[Monica Padman]

I don't even know what that means because, like, that's haircutting lingo.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

Yes. So I still don't really understand it. Like, must be the. The size of the tonsils would be my guess.

[Dax Shepard]

Right. The bleeding's the issue.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. There's, like, bleeding, but you'd think a kid's tonsils would lead to more bleeding.

[Dax Shepard]

Here's what I'm saying. You're gonna have to deal with the.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, do you want me to hold it?

[Dax Shepard]

That's okay. Let's get a little blood in there. Oh, great. Our next area.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. Now, when did the. The US enter the Gulf War?

[Dax Shepard]

January 1, 1991.

[Monica Padman]

January 16, 1991.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, okay. God. I really thought it was, like, right.

[Monica Padman]

On my birthday, but I mean, close. Maybe not. Maybe they were about to, so they probably talked about it. Okay. Now, the Kuwaiti citizenship thing, I'm going.

[Dax Shepard]

To give your hair stylist credit. This is a complicated cut.

[Monica Padman]

You have it is. Oh, yeah, that's Jenny. That's why.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, yeah, that makes sense.

[Monica Padman]

Hi. He comes in and he goes, dad cut his. Your dad cut his finger. Can we have a band?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah. Give me a band aid.

[Monica Padman]

Like, what? And he was like, cutting Monica's.

[Dax Shepard]

I was like, what? What's happening now in this show?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, this is, I think, what we refer to as jumping the shark.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

This may be. Be the last successful episode of the show. Oh, my God.

[Monica Padman]

I know. He really did it. And Monica's hair's in it. Yeah, that's what I told her we should do. We want to rinse it off.

[Dax Shepard]

We'll do that afterwards. I just need to stop it so I can finish this haircut.

[Monica Padman]

Why did you let him do this? Well, I actually asked for it. You should have seen my hair. It was way too long.

[Dax Shepard]

Right.

[Monica Padman]

They're really bad.

[Dax Shepard]

Thank you. I love you. Hide your face.

[Monica Padman]

Okay, I'll do my. I can't guarantee it, but I'll try.

[Dax Shepard]

You know, I was telling Monica that Whiskey's a very bad man who killed 100 men.

[Monica Padman]

You said he's bad?

[Dax Shepard]

She doesn't like it.

[Monica Padman]

No, I just don't like. Well, as you know, I have my struggles with whiskey. Yeah, everybody does.

[Mo Amer]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. There's nothing unique about that. He's a prick, as the whole family will tell you.

[Monica Padman]

He's killed 150 women and he doesn't even care.

[Dax Shepard]

He doesn't talk about that. I think he's ashamed that he's killed that many women.

[Monica Padman]

Well, that's a nice way.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, like, men deserve to get killed.

[Monica Padman]

I took it as like, he's so proud of himself that he did that. That's just like an unspoken. Like, he doesn't even.

[Dax Shepard]

Like, it's tougher to kill the man.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, like he doesn't even think it's a brat.

[Mo Amer]

Exactly. So he doesn't mention it.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm gonna be honest with you. Like, this is gonna be fine. And you're gonna need to see Jenny when you get home.

[Monica Padman]

Okay, I will. Great.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Shout out Jenny Cho, best hairstylist alive. I'll let you guys continue. Thanks.

[Dax Shepard]

Thanks, love. Thanks for saving the day. The show will go on.

[Monica Padman]

It must. Okay, bye.

[Mo Amer]

Bye.

[Dax Shepard]

Bye, sweetie. Love you.

[Monica Padman]

Okay, now back to the fat. How's the blood?

[Dax Shepard]

Blood's done. We're all done with blood.

[Monica Padman]

Great. It didn't bleed through the band aid?

[Dax Shepard]

Nope.

[Monica Padman]

Great.

[Dax Shepard]

It's not like that penis story. I don't think I'll need a chemical Cauterization.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. Now, I asked AI about the Kuwaiti passports and stuff.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

In citizenship, and I. It said in general, no. Being born in Kuwait does not automatically grant you Kuwait citizenship or a passport. Kuwait follows a J. Sanguinis. That means right of blood principle rather than jus soli, right of the soil. This means that citizenship is typically passed through Kuwaiti parents, not by birthplace. A child born in Kuwait to non Kuwaiti parents does not automatically qualify for Kuwaiti citizenship or a passport. Passport. There are very limited exceptions if a child is born to unknown parents or in specific cases where the father is unknown but the mother is Kuwaiti. But those are rare.

[Dax Shepard]

Great.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I mean, not great. If you're born there, I feel like you should be.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, me, Me too. Me too.

[Dax Shepard]

So not great, but great.

[Monica Padman]

Not great, but great for the influence.

[Dax Shepard]

Great to find out. Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. Let's see the Peabody. Do you think maybe we'll get a Peabody for this fact check?

[Dax Shepard]

Well, this might be the one. I mean, I bled for this episode.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, you should have. And. Yeah, and so did I.

[Dax Shepard]

Quite a bit of blood.

[Mo Amer]

Oh, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

We're both bleeding. Rob, you got any blood back there?

[Monica Padman]

Not yet. Okay. The George Foster Peabody Awards, or simply Peabody Awards, or the Peabody, named for the American businessman and philanthropist George Peabody honor what are described as the most powerful, enlightening and invigorating stories in all of television, television, radio and online media. Because of their academic affiliation and reputation for discernment, the awards are held in high esteem with the media industry. And as I told you, they are presented by the Grady College of Journalism and Mass Communications at the University of Georgia. Ding, ding, ding, dingoes. And we still don't have one, even though that's the case, which is pretty.

[Dax Shepard]

Upsetting, doubly embarrassing for us. We should have home court advantage and still no Peabody.

[Monica Padman]

And they. When you're in college there and you're part of the journalism school, which technically I was, because my PR degree was with Grady, you could apply and basically audition, slash try out to be one of their, like, student judges. And I did that, and I did not get chosen.

[Dax Shepard]

You could have been a voice in the Peabody's.

[Monica Padman]

Correct.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, wow.

[Monica Padman]

Anthony got picked.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, God, he is. I'm impressed you're friends with him.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. It speaks to my.

[Dax Shepard]

He kind of blows you away in a lot of these competitive situations. And you still love him because he just killed you at Major Dawn Mahjong.

[Monica Padman]

Yes, he did. He did. He won like three out of three games. Yeah, I guess that's true. Friendship.

[Dax Shepard]

It is, it is. That's how I felt about Aaron. Like, Aaron was just so much physically superior to me and everyone. Everything boy related as a kid, his coordination and his athleticism was off the charts. Like, we both tried out for the basketball team in seventh grade and I didn't make it. And he didn't even want to do it. And he made it and then he just didn't play.

[Monica Padman]

Sure. Oh, that reminds me of an even worse thing that happened with Anthony. No, with Cali. So when I lived in.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, I remember this story somehow, I think.

[Monica Padman]

What was it when I lived in Atlanta after college and I had an agent and was trying to. To work in Atlanta before I moved to la. You know, the auditions that come through aren't that frequent.

[Dax Shepard]

Right.

[Monica Padman]

So it feels like there's a lot of pressure on them. There was a commercial audition for. I don't remember. It was a fast food brand company and. And they basically said, like, bring a friend to the audience audition because you needed to, like, be interacting with someone in it.

[Dax Shepard]

Huh.

[Monica Padman]

And she booked it.

[Dax Shepard]

And she didn't want to be there.

[Monica Padman]

No, she. She wasn't there to act. She was there to just be there with me and do this thing. And then she booked it. I'm pretty sure I did cry about that.

[Dax Shepard]

You did?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, I think so.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, but you guys made it.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, yeah. I didn't blame her. Even then. I didn't blame her. But. But I was like, man, I suck.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Non actor beat me.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, yeah, that's. That's rough.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm sorry that happened.

[Monica Padman]

Thank you. You just got to stick with it, you know?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. War of attrition. Well, we've cleaned up the back.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. I mean, again, Jenny is. She's going to need to come in here, but let me just do it. I'm just going. I'm going to flit around a little bit.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. Yeah. Because you said you like to be playful.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And I'm gonna try to clean up just some of these strays.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm gonna tell you right now, you are free of gray hair, which. That's nice.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Good for you.

[Monica Padman]

Did you pull any out?

[Dax Shepard]

No.

[Monica Padman]

You didn't see any. That's good.

[Dax Shepard]

No, I mean, there's some that are like a slightly different color. Right. But they're not. They're not gray. I don't know how to do this, but let me just take a look at the side here a little bit. We did not not touch the sides, which conventionally you want to Cut the whole hair.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, is that normal?

[Dax Shepard]

That's what I've been told.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. Are you regretful right now that you didn't take this opportunity to shave one side of my hair? Stop.

[Dax Shepard]

I can't believe you guessed this. I brought this down in my pocket. I was like, is she gonna see this thing hanging out of my pocket? This whole thing was leading up. No, this whole thing was leading up to freaking you out and just going.

[Monica Padman]

It really feels like you're doing it. Stop, stop, stop. Did you get some?

[Dax Shepard]

No.

[Mo Amer]

Oh, my God.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, well, it looks a little healthier back here.

[Monica Padman]

This part I'm holding.

[Dax Shepard]

I already did that. That's why you were holding it.

[Mo Amer]

Oh.

[Monica Padman]

Phew. Okay, so it's done.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. I mean, I should probably just quickly look over here. I didn't look anywhere over here. Let me just quickly see what we got over here. What if I fucking shave the side here?

[Mo Amer]

And you are so mad.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And then you looked in the mirror and you were like, I look awesome.

[Monica Padman]

I mean, this was your opportunity.

[Dax Shepard]

There'll be others. You're cheap. No, you're not even cheap. You're lazy.

[Monica Padman]

I've been trying to coordinate with Jenny for, like, a month. Oh, my gosh.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. All right.

[Monica Padman]

It's.

[Dax Shepard]

It's a little better.

[Monica Padman]

It's definitely less straggly.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, it was. It was a little wispy. It was a little too wispy.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. Nice. How do I look?

[Dax Shepard]

That's an improvement. Yeah, yeah, it's better. Okay, again, you need to see Jen.

[Monica Padman]

Rob, what do you think?

[Mo Amer]

Yeah, it looks good.

[Monica Padman]

Okay, great. That looks gorgeous. All right, well, that was great.

[Dax Shepard]

All right, Rob, sit down. That I could actually do a good job.

[Monica Padman]

I think you did a good job.

[Dax Shepard]

I did a fair job. You have way less split ends.

[Monica Padman]

Great. All right, that's it.

[Mo Amer]

Love you.

[Monica Padman]

Love you.

[Dax Shepard]

Follow Armchair Expert on the Wondry app, Amazon Music, or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to every episode of Armchair Expert early and ad free right now by joining joining Wondry plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts. Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short [e-mail] survey.