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Narrator
You've heard her name in headlines during trivia nights and as a punchline, Monica Lewinsky. She's been a major reference in pop culture since she was 24 years old when a scandal made her a household name overnight. Since then, she's fought to redefine her reputation, and now she's ready to use her experience to encourage others to take back their power, too.
Monica Lewinsky
On her new podcast, Reclaiming with Monica Lewinsky, Monica leads honest and wide ranging conversations about what it means to write your own narrative. Each week, guests share how they've rediscovered purpose rebuilt relationships and redefined success after their most vulnerable moments.
Narrator
A single incident can shape how the world views someone's life. It might be a public scandal, a viral moment, a career setback, or a personal struggle. Thrust into the spotlight through raw conversations with actors, athletes, activists, and everyday people, Reclaiming explores what happens after the headlines fade and how to find your voice when the world thinks it already knows your story. You.
Monica Lewinsky
You're about to hear a preview of Reclaiming with Monica Lewinsky. While you're listening. Follow Reclaiming with Monica Lewinsky wherever you get your podcasts.
Olivia Munn
Hi everyone. For today's episode, I spoke with my brave and brilliant friend, Olivia Munn. We met over a decade ago and bonded over all things.
Monica Lewinsky
Woo.
Olivia Munn
Woo. So crystals Astrology. We just got into deep, real conversation really quickly, which is kind of the way I like to do it. You probably know her as an actor and an activist, and if you're on social media, you'd also know her as the mom to adorable Malcolm and May. Because Olivia and I are close, I knew about her struggle with breast cancer in real time. But to hear her heartbreaking and inspiring story in the details that she shared in our conversation, it meant so much to me and made me admire her even more. And for any fans of the newsroom, we went there too. So anyway, I hope you find something to connect to in our chat. And thanks for joining us on Reclaiming. So let's get into it.
Guest
I knew that my friends and people in my life saw me as somebody that would fight back. And I had no idea, I truly had no idea that I could be manipulated and hurt that way, that I wouldn't just get out of something that was dangerous to my psyche.
So, so many, so many women, I think, find themselves in different levels of relationships that are everything from psychologically and emotionally abusive to physically abusive and, and I think find it hard to leave. You know, I mean, and I think people talk more now about, you know, attachment styles and stuff, and so I look back on some of my relationships during what I call my dark decade. So kind of in between 98, graduate school, whatever, and my first person essay in vanity fair in 2014. And I think, I look at it and maybe it's a story I tell myself, but I think about that. The pain I was in staying in relationships with people who value me, who talked to me a certain way, that I allowed and accepted and kept going back for more. And I look at it and I think I was in a deeper pain. And experiencing the pain in the relationship was actually easier. Like, I knew I had to go through pain. And that was easier than the pain of really what I was sitting on. Of both. Not only my experiences in 98, but whatever, all those experiences before it, that, that, that led to all of that.
Olivia Munn
And so did you feel.
Guest
Do you feel like, does that resonate at all or something different?
We had healthy relationships and lucky bitch. Well, that one made up for all of it. It was a bad, bad period of my life. And what I actually realized that I really want to teach my children and any friends of mine is that, you know when they say, like, oh, just go on the date. Like, you never know, like, you, you might like them, you know, you'll at least learn what you don't like. I think for some people who are like, subconsciously vulnerable, which is what I think I was. Cause I had no idea I was like this vulnerable to. To anything that had happened to me post that first date is that if you feel in your gut something's not right, then don't do that first date or get out right away. Because one date could take years off of your life. Not just the period that you're with the person, but if you're lucky enough to get out the years healing yourself afterwards in that particular situation. I had a therapist who I really loved. And I know that she cared about me, or at least I thought she did. And I would constantly, from the very beginning say, I don't. I don't know about this. I don't think this is the right I want to get. And then it got worse and worse. I'd be calling her crying and be like, I gotta get out.
Like.
And I was like, help me get out. Like, help me. Like, wow. Like. And this is, this is shocking to people. But. But she encouraged me to stay. She thought that, you know, my quote unquote picker was off. And she would look at it as like. But this person on paper looked great. And when there was couples therapy, they knew how to present the right way. So. So then. Then the stories I would tell seemed unbelievable.
I think what's interesting to me is to just think about how you had this strong sense of self, you lost yourself in this relationship. You. What's so interesting to me is because I think this is in a short period you were able to. It may have felt like forever to you and may have seemed near impossible, but you actually stepped into a healing mode and found yourself again in what I think is like a very powerful and quick, quick, quick way, you know, in a really. And that's one of the things that I admire about you, is that you are that you have. And I think that's part of. I think that's the good side of the black and white, the good side of the kind of the fierceness, the going in and it's a decisiveness that.
Narrator
Was just a preview of reclaiming with Monica Lewinsky. Watch new episodes on YouTube or listen wherever you get your podcasts.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard: Episode Summary – "Wondery Presents: Reclaiming with Monica Lewinsky"
Podcast Information:
In this compelling episode of Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard, the spotlight shifts to Monica Lewinsky and her transformative podcast, Reclaiming with Monica Lewinsky. Monica, known globally from a pivotal moment in her life that thrust her into the public eye, has since dedicated herself to redefining her narrative and empowering others to do the same. The episode delves into Monica’s mission to help individuals reclaim their stories after facing public scrutiny or personal setbacks.
Narrator Introduction [00:00 - 00:55]: The episode opens with a narration highlighting Monica Lewinsky's journey from a household name associated with scandal to a vocal advocate for personal redemption and empowerment. The narrator emphasizes Monica’s commitment to exploring how individuals can rewrite their narratives beyond singular, defining moments.
The core of the episode features an in-depth conversation between Monica Lewinsky and her friend Olivia Munn, a renowned actor and activist. Their discussion navigates through Olivia's personal challenges, including her battle with breast cancer, and her strategies for overcoming adversity.
Olivia Munn’s Introduction [01:08 - 01:18]: Olivia introduces herself and sets the stage for the conversation, mentioning her long-standing friendship with Monica and hinting at the profound topics they will explore together.
Monica Lewinsky’s Opening Remarks [01:18 - 01:34]: Monica expresses excitement about the candid and deep nature of the conversation, reinforcing the podcast’s theme of vulnerability and honest dialogue.
Olivia’s Personal Journey [01:34 - 05:20]: Olivia shares her personal struggles, particularly her experience with breast cancer and the emotional turmoil she faced during her "dark decade" between 1998 and 2014. She reflects on the complexities of abusive relationships and the difficulty of breaking free from them, despite outward appearances of strength.
Key Insights and Discussions:
The Impact of Single Incidents on Personal Narratives: Olivia discusses how singular events, such as public scandals or personal struggles, can disproportionately shape public perception and personal identity. She emphasizes the importance of redefining one's story beyond these incidents.
Notable Quote [02:03]:
"I knew that my friends and people in my life saw me as somebody that would fight back. And I had no idea, I truly had no idea that I could be manipulated and hurt that way."
Navigating Abusive Relationships: The conversation delves into the complexities of recognizing and exiting toxic relationships. Olivia candidly describes her own experiences with psychologically and emotionally abusive relationships, highlighting the internal conflicts that arise when deciding to leave.
Notable Quote [02:22]:
"So many, so many women, I think, find themselves in different levels of relationships that are everything from psychologically and emotionally abusive to physically abusive and, and I think find it hard to leave."
The Role of Therapy and Support Systems: Olivia touches on her interactions with therapists, revealing the challenges in seeking help and the sometimes misguided guidance received. She underscores the importance of having supportive and understanding mental health professionals.
Notable Quote [05:17]:
"I was like, help me get out. Like, help me. Like, wow."
Self-Discovery and Healing: The dialogue emphasizes the journey of self-discovery and healing that follows the end of a tumultuous relationship. Olivia shares how she managed to find herself again, illustrating the resilience required to overcome past pain.
Notable Quote [05:54]:
"I stepped into a healing mode and found yourself again in what I think is like a very powerful and quick, quick, quick way."
Empowering Future Generations: Olivia expresses her desire to teach her children and friends about the importance of trusting one’s instincts and learning from each relationship, whether it lasts or not. She advocates for recognizing and acting upon gut feelings to prevent long-term emotional damage.
Notable Quote [03:55]:
"If you feel in your gut something's not right, then don't do that first date or get out right away. Because one date could take years off of your life."
Monica acknowledges Olivia's journey and resilience, praising her ability to rapidly enter a healing phase and regain her sense of self. This section highlights Monica's role in facilitating meaningful and supportive conversations that validate and celebrate personal growth.
Narrator’s Closing Remarks [06:53]: The episode wraps up with a reminder to viewers to watch new episodes of Reclaiming with Monica Lewinsky on YouTube or listen via their preferred podcast platforms, encouraging continued engagement with the series.
This episode of Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard offers a profound exploration of personal recovery and empowerment through Monica Lewinsky’s Reclaiming podcast. The conversation between Monica and Olivia Munn serves as a powerful testament to the strength required to overcome abuse, redefine personal narratives, and inspire others to reclaim their lives. Through honest dialogue and shared experiences, the episode underscores the significance of vulnerability, the necessity of supportive relationships, and the transformative power of self-awareness and resilience.
Notable Quotes with Timestamps:
This structured summary encapsulates the essence of the episode, providing a thorough overview for listeners and non-listeners alike. It highlights the key discussions between Monica Lewinsky and Olivia Munn, offering insights into overcoming personal struggles and redefining one's life narrative.