Zooey Deschanel Returns

Summary

Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard: "Zooey Deschanel Returns"

Release Date: December 15, 2025
Guests: Zooey Deschanel
Co-host: Monica Padman

---

Overview

This festive holiday episode welcomes back Zooey Deschanel—the beloved actor and musician known for "New Girl," "Elf," and her She & Him holiday albums—to the Armchair Expert studio. Dax, Monica, and Zooey dive into everything from family, pets, and Christmas traditions to the wildfires that impacted Zooey's family, in a conversation both heartfelt and playful. The episode also features candid discussions about parenting, creativity, ADHD, the enduring appeal of "Elf," and ends with an intimate, live rendition of "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas." Sprinkled throughout are plenty of laughs, reflections on loss and growth, and some delightful asides on coffee, cats, home improvement, and viral cultural moments.

---

Key Discussion Points

Festive Beginnings and Coffee Talk

• [03:09] Cheerful banter about coffee mugs, gifts, and the Ember mug effect on their consumption habits:

  • Dax and Zooey swap stories about the new normal in drinking coffee—Ember mugs keep it warm, leading to more savoring and less frantic gulping.
    • Zooey: “It makes me drink just the right amount...which is a lot.”
    • Dax: “I used to drink two in the morning...mostly because I didn’t like that it was getting cold. And this, I leisurely sip. It’s cut down my coffee in the morning in half.”

• [04:16] McDonald’s hot coffee lawsuit reminiscence:

  • Dax and Zooey reflect on the infamous lawsuit and the public's misunderstanding of the case after watching "Hot Coffee," the documentary.

---

Family, Fire, and the Enduring Bread Story

• [05:36] Zooey's mom's legendary homemade bread and the legacy of her sourdough starter:

  • After Zooey's parents’ home burned down in the wildfires, family heirlooms—including her mom’s 40-year-old sourdough starter—took on new significance.
    • Zooey: “My mom...has been baking bread my whole childhood...the starter’s been around 40 years.”
  • The emotional toll and the physical loss are recounted with humor and sensitivity.
    • Zooey: “You think of something else you lost that was precious. You go, ‘Oh no! The slate from being there...’”

• [09:10] Packing during a wildfire and family dynamics:

  • Insights into gendered responses to evacuation and loss (what would you save: clothes vs. cars), and Zooey’s partner Jonathan’s rugged, fix-everything Canadian upbringing.
    • Dax: “Kristen was making these decisions from her closet that were Sophie’s Choice-esque...I have a car collection that's going to be gone.”

---

Cats, Dogs, and “Fanciness”

• [10:20] On cats “being fancy” & pet ownership sexual stereotypes:

  • Musings about media depictions of cats vs. dogs, “Fancy Feast” ads, and why cats are coded as feminine.
    • Zooey: “We gender dogs as male and cats as female. That they’re fancy.”
  • [14:31] Cats vs. dogs: intelligence and trainability
    • Zooey: “My cats are so smart. I showed them to do something once and they do it immediately.”

• [12:15] First-time cat ownership:

  • Zooey’s newfound love for the affection and intelligence of her trio of kittens after a lifetime of being “a cat person without cats.”

---

Celebrity, Parenting, and “Elf”

• [17:23] On fans, “New Girl,” and using comedy for comfort:

  • Zooey reflects on her warm relationship with “New Girl” fans and how the show serves as a comforting bedtime re-watch for many.

• [20:20] Holiday classics & being iconic:

  • Zooey discusses the surreal and delightful experience of starring in a film like “Elf” that resurfaces annually to delight a new generation.
    • Zooey: “I knew when I read that script, if this hits, it’ll come around every year. That is good real estate.”
  • Her kids’ sidelong appreciation (preferring “Die Hard” over “Elf”), and the awkwardness of parents being on-screen—especially in romantic roles.

---

Kids, Child Stardom & Showbiz Realities

• [28:31] Raising kids with performing ambitions (but none of the stage-parenting):

  • Zooey is clear on following her own parents’ hard-won rules: kids can audition on their own at 16, but childhood is for being a kid.
    • Zooey: “You can do as much theater and music stuff and whatever you want...but you’re not going to be a child actor.”

• [29:34] Changing reality: classmates in commercials, the LA bubble, and wanting kids to know real-life means not everyone’s parent is a TV star.

---

ADHD: Culture, Diagnosis, and Coping Skills

• [37:43] A wide-ranging, candid segment on ADHD:
  • The hosts discuss the rise in self-diagnosis versus clinical diagnosis.
    • Zooey: “ADHD isn’t a problem with being able to focus. Sometimes it’s focusing more than you should.”
  • Monica distinguishes between genuine ADHD and cultural overidentification; Zooey shares her personal journey with coping strategies instilled from childhood.
  • Discussion of impulsivity, “time blindness,” and the sometimes-punishing internal monologue of those with ADHD.

Notable Quotes

• “My sister and I would talk about this...Do you have an endless running video in your mind of the dumbest shit you ever did? Just playing on repeat?" —Zooey [44:23]

---

"Merv": Dogs, Rom-Coms, and a Little Christmas

• [45:48] Zooey’s new film on Prime Video:
  • “Merv” is a rom-com about a couple sharing custody of a depressed dog post-breakup, with lots of adorable dog action (and some sausage-powered dog acting behind the scenes!).
  • Zooey: “It’s a dog movie. A rom-com. And kind of a Christmas movie too. It’s all in one.”

Notable Quotes

• “You’d be dead inside if not one of those hit you: Christmas, romance, and puppies.” —Dax [49:05]

---

Christmas Traditions, Home, and Instagram Detoxing

• [54:43] Decorating with wild abandon & evolving household rituals:
  • The household is described as a Christmas wonderland, complete with room-specific trees and custom ornament themes.
• [55:13] Digital detox from Instagram & TikTok (while keeping YouTube):
  • Zooey shares her decision to remove time-consuming social apps from her phone and the newfound time and peace gained.
    • Zooey: “I have so much time now. No offense to Instagram. I just erased it...and realized there’s a whole world out there.”

---

Food, Allergies, and Cookie Group Chats

• [56:35] What’s on Zooey’s Christmas dinner table? Chicken, roasted potatoes, salad, and cookies—lots of cookies!
  • Confessions of struggles with fake protein allergies and a pivot back to eating meat (sustainably).

---

Gift Exchange & Holiday Reflections

• [71:23+] (Segment: Group Gift Exchange)
  • Hilarity, elaborate gift giving (and logistical failures), and a video love letter “boyfriend” prank gift ensue, ending in laughter over personalized presents and inside jokes.
• [102:07] Golden Globe Nomination Announcement & Reaction:
  • Sincere gratitude, a bit of disbelief, and a behind-the-scenes tour of the emotions and realities of podcasting.

---

Segment: Fact Check

• [111:45+]
  • The episode wraps up with the signature “Fact Check” where Monica and the team address moments discussed earlier, including the McDonald's coffee case (naming Stella Liebeck), cat vs. dog intelligence, Los Angeles dog demographics, and a countdown of the best Christmas movies.
  • Notable trivia:
    • Cat owners statistically have slightly higher IQs, but both cats and dogs display unique intelligence.

---

Memorable Moment

[59:56] Live Performance: "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas"

• Zooey, with accompaniment, delivers an achingly beautiful and intimate version of this classic, complete with a story about Judy Garland’s emotional original performance in “Meet Me in St. Louis."
  • Zooey: “It’s so beautiful...I’m crying. Tears behind my eyes just thinking about it.”

---

Selected Quotes & Highlights

• On fame and family:

  • “They thought everyone had a TV show and I was like, oh no. Okay, we need to make sure they know everyone has different jobs.” —Zooey [32:44]

• On ADHD and self-criticism:

  • “Do you have an endless running video in your mind of, like, the dumbest shit you ever did? Just playing on repeat?” —Zooey [44:23]

• On parenting and showbiz:

  • “You can do as much theater...but you’re not going to be like a child actor. We just want you to be a kid.” —Zooey [29:09]
  • “I want to protect going to Northwestern with crazy outfits and not fitting in.” —Dax [31:17]

• On the power of TV comfort food:

  • “A lot of people use [New Girl] as a comfort thing where they watch it again and again. I love that.” —Zooey [17:58]

---

Timestamps for Major Segments

• [03:09] - Coffee Mugs and Hot Coffee Lawsuit Discussion
• [05:36] - Bread, Wildfire Loss, and Family Stories
• [10:20] - Cats vs. Dogs “Fanciness” and Ownership
• [17:23] - Fandom, “New Girl” and TV as Comfort
• [20:20] - “Elf” and Christmas Movie Legacy
• [28:31] - Parenting, Child Stardom, and Performance
• [37:43] - ADHD: Diagnosis, Culture, and Coping
• [45:48] - Zooey’s Movie “Merv”: Dog Rom-Com
• [54:43] - Decorating, Instagram Detox, and Christmas Dinner
• [59:56] - Zooey Sings "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas"
• [71:23+] - Group Gift Exchange
• [102:07] - Golden Globe Nomination Reaction
• [111:45] - Fact Check

---

Tone & Style

The episode is playful, honest, thoughtful, and intimate, balancing laugh-out-loud moments with real, sometimes raw reflections on family, loss, creativity, and finding joy amid chaos. Dax’s friendly ribbing, Monica’s wry observations, and Zooey’s sincere warmth set a cozy, inviting mood. Expect a blend of quirky banter, vulnerable confession, serious insight, and a good dose of holiday spirit.

---

Closing

This episode offers much more than celebrity levity—it’s a celebration of resilience, connection, nostalgia, and the small pleasures in life (like bread, cookies, or the purr of a cat). It’s a perfect companion for the holiday season, but delivers nuggets of wisdom and comfort for any time of the year.

Must-hear for fans of Zooey Deschanel, fans of genuine, meandering conversation, and anyone craving a reminder of the messy, beautiful, and downright funny experience of being human.

---

Recommended: Listen from [59:56] for Zooey’s gorgeous holiday song and the spirited discussion about perfection in music, nostalgia, and artistry.

Transcript

[Dax Shepard]

Wondry plus subscribers can listen to Armchair Expert early and ad free right now. Join Wondri in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts or you can listen for free wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome, welcome, welcome to Armchair Expert. I'm Dan Shepard. I'm joined by Lily Padman. And today we have just one of the more adorable humans on planet Earth.

[Monica Padman]

Yes, a Christmas mouse.

[Dax Shepard]

Charming, quirky, smart, talented, great singer, Zooey Deschanel, an actor and a musician. Dance, new girl. 500 days of summer. Elf. Yes man. And she has a new movie on Prime Video called Merv. Merv, I'm going to promise you right now this, this movie is getting watched by my family, who are all dog lovers. Yes, it's an adorable story about a couple that's broken up and the dog is so depressed.

[Monica Padman]

Sorry, dog.

[Dax Shepard]

Sorry Murph. Please enjoy. Zooey Deschanel.

[Monica Padman]

Well, there's a special surprise in this episode. We get something very special from Zoe that we kind of forced to happen.

[Dax Shepard]

She came very generous. She was in the holiday spirit.

[Monica Padman]

That's right. So enjoy, enjoy the little special and.

[Dax Shepard]

Tune thank you to our presenting sponsor, Audible, for supporting this episode. Armchair's Audible's Best of 2025 collection is here. The year's top audiobooks, podcasts and originals across every genre. Their editors spent countless hours listening and debating to hand pick this year's must listens. If you want to finish the year with something you know is going to hit, check out Audible's best of 2025 and discover why there's more to imagine when you listen, go to audible.com bestof2025 we are supported by ServiceNow. You know what I love? Not having to do boring, repetitive stuff. I want to focus on the interesting conversations, the creative work, the things that really matter to me. And apparently that's exactly what ServiceNow does for entire organizations. AI is only as powerful as the platform it's built into. Here's the thing. ServiceNow has basically become the operating system of AI. Instead of Frankensteining together different tools, ServiceNow unifies people, data, workflows and AI connecting every corner of your business. That's why it's no surprise that more than 85% of the Fortune 500 use the ServiceNow AI platform. Talking HR, customer service, every department you can think of. And here's what's cool. They got Idris Elba as their brand ambassador. I mean, come on, if you're going to have someone represent your company, might as well be the guy who's basically the CEO Everyone wants to be right. With AI agents working together autonomously, anyone in any department can focus on the work that matters Most. Learn how ServiceNow puts AI to work for [e-mail].

[Zooey Deschanel]

He'S an Upchurch. These are my favorite cups.

[Monica Padman]

Ember.

[Dax Shepard]

Aren't they the best?

[Zooey Deschanel]

They're the best.

[Dax Shepard]

They're not a sponsor.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I give it as gifts a lot.

[Dax Shepard]

It's a great gift. I want to ask what drinking out of an Ember mug has done to your overall coffee intake? Because it is a dress. Mine?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. It's scintillating.

[Zooey Deschanel]

It's up.

[Dax Shepard]

First of all, these glasses are so cute.

[Zooey Deschanel]

They really are.

[Monica Padman]

I love them. You look so cute.

[Zooey Deschanel]

You guys look so cute.

[Dax Shepard]

Stop.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Okay, wait. It makes me drink just the right amount, which is however many cups I have, which is a lot.

[Dax Shepard]

I have a lot, too. But I used to drink two in the morning while I was doing my journaling. But I realized that was mostly because I didn't like that it was getting cold. Right.

[Zooey Deschanel]

And you drink it too fast.

[Dax Shepard]

I was drinking it fast to deal with the temperature loss. And this, I leisurely sip. And it has cut down my coffee in the morning in half.

[Zooey Deschanel]

You know what? It actually probably has with me, too. And then I get so disappointed when my coffee gets cold.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, yeah, I know.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Even I always ask for extra hot at cafes so that the end of the drink, it's not disappointingly cold.

[Dax Shepard]

What do they normally respond to you with when you request that? Because it feels like a liability. With disdain.

[Zooey Deschanel]

They were like, chef likes it.

[Dax Shepard]

At the end.

[Zooey Deschanel]

They're like, okay, yeah, Chef likes it. Loop.

[Dax Shepard]

You didn't happen to ever see the documentary about the woman who famously. And when we were kids, the whole world knew that a woman burnt her legs with McDonald's coffee? Oh, yes.

[Zooey Deschanel]

That was huge. Huge.

[Dax Shepard]

It was the biggest. And it was pitched to us in a certain way.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Like, oh, she was such a diva.

[Monica Padman]

Exactly.

[Zooey Deschanel]

This diva wants hot coffee. And then they gave her hot coffee, and she burned herself.

[Dax Shepard]

Yes. And it was the ultimate symbol of frivolous lawsuits.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Right, Right.

[Dax Shepard]

That's how it was pitched us.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah, that's how it was pitched.

[Dax Shepard]

There's an incredible documentary called Hot Coffee Coffee. It's about this woman, Zoe. Her entire thighs had to have skin grafts.

[Monica Padman]

It was really too hot.

[Dax Shepard]

It was insane. I burned off all of her skin. And that year that she sued, mind you, she didn't sue for any money. She just wanted the skin graph paid for. It was like 50 grand or whatever. The settlement. We all Heard about. Was the jury going, no, no, we need to punish McDonald's at least one day of coffee sales. So they added up what they made in one day of coffee sales, gave it to her because they had had at that moment already a hundred and some complaints that year of similar.

[Zooey Deschanel]

That's too hot.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. Everyone's like that.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

And she was just an old lady with no skin on her. And she just wanted the graph paid for Zoe. But she left a millionaire.

[Monica Padman]

Good job.

[Zooey Deschanel]

You know what? She got the money.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

That's what we're worth it. Let's talk about the bread.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Yes. Okay. So, Mary Jo, this was my curiosity because I re listened to your episode today on a hike, which is going on four years ago.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah, it was a little while.

[Dax Shepard]

But at that time four years ago, Mary Jo was a huge fan.

[Zooey Deschanel]

She still is. Freaking huge.

[Monica Padman]

So happy we still.

[Zooey Deschanel]

She's an armchair. Would she have baked you guys bread?

[Dax Shepard]

See, I don't know enough. Is she someone who hands out bread willy nilly?

[Zooey Deschanel]

No, she's not.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. I feel so. No.

[Zooey Deschanel]

If she loves you, she'll bake you bread.

[Robbie]

Oh, she loves.

[Zooey Deschanel]

That means she loves you guys.

[Dax Shepard]

Yes. Because she's long past the excited feeling phase of letting people know she knows how to do stuff.

[Zooey Deschanel]

She hears. She's like always okay.

[Dax Shepard]

But I mean, in the bread baking world.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Oh, the bread.

[Dax Shepard]

Like, like Kristen's still making a couple hundred loaves a day to hand out to people because it's still very impressive for people to receive a loaf from her. But that'll wear off.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Right.

[Dax Shepard]

But so Mary Jo's down to like the real baker.

[Zooey Deschanel]

My mom, when I was growing up, just baked bread. That was what she ate. She likes to eat her own bread and she bakes it for herself to eat. Nourishing. And so their house burned down last year, which was really sad. I was trying to make sure they were okay. I knew my mom needed her sourdough back up and running and her starter. And my dad needed a camera.

[Dax Shepard]

What kind of camera did dad need?

[Zooey Deschanel]

Well, he still needs like a Leica. That's what he. But we got him, you know, he has other stuff to remind people.

[Dax Shepard]

Your father's a very famous cinematographer.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yes, yes, yes.

[Dax Shepard]

Acclaim.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yes. Bravo.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Zooey Deschanel]

But my mom, my kids call her Jojo, which is very cute. Jojo needed her sourdough. The starter has been around for like 40 years. My whole childhood, she was baking bread. She'd given it to some friends. So we got her sourdough, her original starter, and she got it back, and then she's been, you know, baking in their apartment.

[Dax Shepard]

Were they evacuated at your house?

[Zooey Deschanel]

They were. And then we were evacuated for a while, but then when they'd lost their house, they came and stayed with us for maybe, like, three weeks. They wanted their own place, though.

[Dax Shepard]

They were done.

[Zooey Deschanel]

No, we have but nice guest house. But I think they think they're imposing.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, that's what it is.

[Zooey Deschanel]

And so they just get nervous about we're imposing.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. We need to give them their space.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

That's so sad.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. How sad was that? The childhood house?

[Zooey Deschanel]

It was, like, so sad.

[Dax Shepard]

Devastating.

[Zooey Deschanel]

It felt like a person, you know, you're like, oh, my God. Now I just don't think about it.

[Monica Padman]

Intentionally until you're here and we make you talk about it.

[Zooey Deschanel]

No, I can talk about it in a sort of emotionally distant way. But I realized there was a while where it was like, every day you think of something else that you lost that was precious. You go, oh, no. The slate from being there, that was, like, on the wall, you know, like that. No. And then my dad will be like, my wine. You know, like things he collected for years.

[Dax Shepard]

What did they bring to your house? Anything.

[Zooey Deschanel]

So they had almost nothing. The one thing that my dad got, thank God, because they left for an appointment before. It was just bad luck. They didn't even get a suitcase. But my dad saw the smoke and went back in and grabbed his. That had all his photography on it.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, thank God.

[Zooey Deschanel]

So thank God. That was one of those divine gifts. Photo albums all gone. But he's, like, amazing about digitizing. He digitized everything. So everything was digitized. There was maybe a few things that weren't, but he's like, obsessive Virgo, who. He would spend months, every day working, like it was a job digitizing his photography. Whenever he was off work, you'd be like, have a little fun.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. This is killing me.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I was like, that's my legacy.

[Monica Padman]

Yes. I feel like we learned nothing from the fires, because when it was happening, I was like, okay, gotta digitize everything. Gotta make a go bag. I didn't do anything. It's been a year almost.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah, it is hard because you want the stuff in the go bag that you want. I want stuff I want to wear. But then I want to wear that. So take it out of the go bag. The go bag. Do you buy just, like, an extra pair of jeans that you love and an extra top that you love and put it in the go bag?

[Dax Shepard]

What did you Pack, see clothes. This is a fascinating kind of gendered thing, which is Kristen was making these decisions from her closet that were Sophie's Choice Ask. It's like, fuck, I got to leave a lot of this behind. To me, it was a little nuts. I'm like, oh, well, I have a car collection that's going to be gone. How many can we actually drive out of here?

[Zooey Deschanel]

Jonathan insisted on driving each car out. He did, like, I mean, we don't have, like, any fan. You know, we had an extra car that he just was like, well, if it's there, it's going.

[Dax Shepard]

So he was shuttling around.

[Zooey Deschanel]

He kind of shuttled that out. But we had so little time, and I had to pack the kids and me and packed our cats stuff up, and we just gotten three kittens.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh.

[Zooey Deschanel]

And so I was just like, I only had a really short time.

[Dax Shepard]

It limits where you can go, too, as well. Like, if you called me and said, hey, I'd like to come over with my family, but, like, absolutely. And if you go, but I have three kittens, I would go call some other people first. Oh, no. You know, like, I'm still here for you, but try to find it more hospitable.

[Zooey Deschanel]

We were in, like, a tiny hotel room with three kittens. And normally they don't sleep in our room, and they're so cute, but they were being understandably worried about me. And so they kept snuggling up, like. And I'd be like, but I can't sleep. Licking any skin that was exposed.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, they want to eat you a little bit, though.

[Monica Padman]

They were sensing her anxiety and they were trying to fix it, but it was really making it worse.

[Dax Shepard]

We also know that they eat their owners when they die. Like, we know that about them.

[Monica Padman]

They eat your brain.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Dogs and cats.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm glad this topic came up and you now have cats, because I was watching last night a commercial on 60 Minutes. In this commercial, it was for Fancy Feast. And they were like, she'll know. You know, whatever. They treat the cat like she's some elegant mistress, a queen. And then the owner, the mom, she unveiled this Fancy Feast that comes in a can, but it's, like, layered at the top. It looks gorgeous.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And I was like, when did we decide cats are fancy?

[Zooey Deschanel]

I know why. It's kind of a weird reason, though. It's more about marketing. It's just that when dogs run, they're like. When cats walk, they're, like, little prissy because they have Slinkies in their back. They're Like. Like and everything. And they can fully fold. They're very elegant. If you are holding a cat and they start wiggling and then they jump out of your arms, they literally won't fall. They'll always fall on their feet. Whereas if you're holding a dog and you dropped the. The dog, the dog might land on.

[Dax Shepard]

Its rib, might hurt, but the cat.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Will land on its feet.

[Dax Shepard]

They're very agile. That I agree. I think that's why the classiness, this notion that we're going to feed this cat, this feast, a fancy feast. I think it has more to do with the owners.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Well, I have three cats. One of them looks crazy.

[Dax Shepard]

Have you owned cats prior to these cats?

[Zooey Deschanel]

No, they're my.

[Dax Shepard]

And are they changing you?

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah. I always loved cats. I always thought they were so cute, but I never had one before. And they're very affectionate.

[Monica Padman]

I think it's because we associate them with being smart. They are smart.

[Zooey Deschanel]

They're so smart. It's crazy.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, they are.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Zooey Deschanel]

My cats are so smart.

[Dax Shepard]

They are smart. It's like smarter than a dog. Do you have had dogs?

[Zooey Deschanel]

They're smarter than the dogs. The dogs are a little like, you know, I mean, the dog I worked with on this movie is like, incredibly smart.

[Dax Shepard]

But that's a professional actor.

[Zooey Deschanel]

He's a dog actor.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Yeah, he's smart. There. I'd cut from a different cloth.

[Zooey Deschanel]

And I love dogs, but my cats, I show them to do something once and they do it immediately. Like, I got a new litter thing. A litter robot.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, sure.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Pretty cool. There was all this stuff. It was like, you have to do all this stuff to switch them. I literally put the litter in. My favorite cat, Dove, was looking at me. I looked at her and she saw. She jumped in and used it right away on command.

[Dax Shepard]

She went. She knew number one or two.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I can't remember.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. I think you'd remember if it's number two.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I think it was number one.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

It doesn't matter. She had to work her way up to number two.

[Dax Shepard]

Guys, at the risk of offending anyone, you don't think there's anything to do with the just gendered natured of cat ownership?

[Zooey Deschanel]

Oh, that. Cats are more like.

[Dax Shepard]

Women want to make this fancy meal for their cat. I don't know.

[Zooey Deschanel]

It might be.

[Dax Shepard]

I just can't imagine a dude in the commercial for the dog. You know, it's three tiered and then there's this beautiful thing on top. I don't know.

[Monica Padman]

I guess something's going on with what.

[Dax Shepard]

We'Ve done to cats, I think it's.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Not just the owners gender but it's how we gender that animals because I think we gender dogs as male and gender cats as female. That they're fancy.

[Dax Shepard]

Sure, sure.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Elegant. Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

That really hit me last night and I've been watching those commercials for 50 years. But last night I was like, well, they put a lot of effort into this cat food.

[Monica Padman]

Although dog food has become more and more. It's like dogs need human food now.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Right.

[Monica Padman]

Fancy feast is not human grade. But most dogs I know now eat human food.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Right.

[Monica Padman]

Like cooked on a stove till it' mushy and palatable.

[Dax Shepard]

We have a delivery system that embarrasses me a little bit.

[Monica Padman]

It's very fresh and I guess it is still male. Like males need but again to be perfect.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. For muscle.

[Zooey Deschanel]

They gotta get the muscles going.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, back to Jonathan. So during the fires.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I imagine you're in a similar situation with Kristen, which is my hunch is you have a more traditional dude on your hands.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Because he's a builder. And where is he from? Texas.

[Monica Padman]

Canada.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Canada. Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

So he's just nice.

[Zooey Deschanel]

He's so nice.

[Dax Shepard]

But rugged.

[Zooey Deschanel]

He grew up on a ranch.

[Dax Shepard]

He's rugged.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah. Oh, yeah. He grew up like picking rocks off.

[Dax Shepard]

The ground and setting and. Yeah.

[Zooey Deschanel]

And like building fences while you're in Hollywood. Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Couldn't be more like it's still completely a fairy tale for you.

[Monica Padman]

It still feels like there were fences there. Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Like your, your imagination of his childhood versus maybe what it was. So I said at one point, okay, so we're getting close to, you know, they've evacuated, I don't know, six blocks away. And I was like, okay, you know, if it gets to ours, you guys bounce. I'm staying. You know, I had all the hoses out and the generator but I was going to stay for sure and water the house.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Okay. So what was interesting was I was like, he kept being like. And I'm like, seriously, we're going to have to go.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. And you're like, my parents house just burned down.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Well, it wasn't happen yet. Yeah, no, we had to evacuate. Pretty same.

[Dax Shepard]

Where do you live?

[Zooey Deschanel]

We're in Brentwood.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh yeah.

[Zooey Deschanel]

So we were like, he just is like, don't freak out. And I'm like, I'm freaking out. So I would say I'm more on the let's just evacuate before we need to. And he's like, let's just wait.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. And it's like, why wait?

[Zooey Deschanel]

And I'M like, why are we waiting? Let's get out. The evacuation situation was so interesting. Everyone was evacuated in that time. And so you go to a hotel and it's like all the doodles in the Palisades. It's a dog.

[Dax Shepard]

A dog.

[Zooey Deschanel]

It was kind of like cheering me up because everyone has a doodle. It's just a doodle city. And then what was also funny was the hotel was still doing people's weddings at the same time.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, wow.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Because they're not going to call off people's weddings.

[Dax Shepard]

No, no. Fires are no fires.

[Zooey Deschanel]

And I had to take the cats out of the room so they could clean it. And I have, like, three kittens and kitten carriers. And I'm sitting there. Everyone's just in the state. And they're like, so over here is where we'll do cocktail hour.

[Dax Shepard]

Like, they're doing the show Must go.

[Zooey Deschanel]

And I was like, this is so wild.

[Monica Padman]

Life is wild.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah, life is wild.

[Dax Shepard]

Do you ever get conscious of, you know, people recognize you, you're aware of it, and you're often in public doing things that are just kind of weird because you're a human and you have to do weird things.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

So I'd imagine, like, someone who is on vacation and then you're there with three cats.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I gotta get these out of the room.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Crazy sweatpants. I definitely was like, if someone recognizes me, this will be like, a fun story.

[Dax Shepard]

Like, if you saw Al Pacino holding.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Three cats, I kind of gave them a gift. I would be like, this is the best celeb sighting ever. Let me tell you what I saw. Al Pacino holding three cats.

[Dax Shepard]

I would guess this is such a guess because I wasn't on the show, but I feel like the fans of New Girl are really great fans.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Oh, yes. I love.

[Monica Padman]

Because it's such a good show. So again, smart cats.

[Dax Shepard]

And also conceptually, it's like, we're going to root for quirky.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Right. So that weeds out. It's not Beverly Hills 90210 at something different.

[Zooey Deschanel]

It's true. It's definitely such a good group. I love everyone that comes up to me and watches that show. And what I've noticed, it's kind of weird and it's not what I would expect is that, by the way, I keep, like, accidentally looking at the camera behind your head.

[Dax Shepard]

What is your first day in front of a camera? Like, you got your reflection. You can't look away.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I love the people who like New Girl. And also a lot of people use it as like a comfort thing where they watch it again and again. They're like, I watch it every night before I go to bed. I love that. And it makes me feel like we can be cozy for them. We're like a nice sleepy one.

[Monica Padman]

What's your show? What's your cozy show or movie?

[Zooey Deschanel]

We like to watch True Crime.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, True crime.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Is that like, weird?

[Monica Padman]

But we just learned about this. Does your husband like true crime too? Okay, I like that. That's gender challenging.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Don't men like True Crime? He doesn't like Bravo as much as I do.

[Dax Shepard]

We just had an expert on about this.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Oh, about True crime.

[Dax Shepard]

Specifically the book Morbid Curiosity. Morbid Curiosity, Yeah. And how beneficial it is for us as humans to be able to model out our fears and plan.

[Monica Padman]

We're attracted to true crime because we can kind of in our brain play out or hear the end of a story that we might find ourselves specifically.

[Dax Shepard]

Viewers are really interested when you do studies on them. What sign did this person miss? That's women's big preoccupation. A lot with true crime is, wow, they knew this guy. What did they miss? I gotta find out what not to miss.

[Zooey Deschanel]

No, it's true. I like it when there's like a new documentary that's eight parts or something. I love like the Staircase, that type of thing.

[Dax Shepard]

I love that. Remember how good the Staircase was? You had to order the DVDs from Netflix and it took a long time and you get up and put them in.

[Zooey Deschanel]

You really earned it.

[Dax Shepard]

You know what was nice about this, and I'm just remembering is now when you're streaming, you just run through, whereas you had a built in break to stand up and go put that DVD in and be like, oh, let's go to the bathroom, let's make more snacks. It kind of compartmentalized it in a fun way.

[Monica Padman]

You know what I was thinking recently? I think the streamers should have a playlist option where you can make your own playlist of episodes of any TV show or movie or whatever.

[Zooey Deschanel]

That's a great idea. I think you're totally right.

[Monica Padman]

How much are they gonna pay me for this? Cause if you make a playlist and then you just put on, it's like, oh, I'm watching this episode of Friends and then this episode of New Girl and then this episode.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, and you were saying it would be communal kind of social networking if.

[Monica Padman]

We wanted it to be, but it's just like I'm letting that run all day. A playlist I created.

[Dax Shepard]

You would love that because you rewatch things a lot. Do you do a lot of rewatching?

[Zooey Deschanel]

It depends. There are movies that I like to rewatch. I don't normally rewatch a TV show.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. Now Christmas time.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Is upon us.

[Zooey Deschanel]

It's upon us.

[Dax Shepard]

I've always wondered, like, we've never interviewed Chevy Chase, but I do want to know. I would love if a movie of mine came out every single year.

[Zooey Deschanel]

It's great.

[Dax Shepard]

And a great one of mine, no less.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Right?

[Dax Shepard]

Is it fun?

[Zooey Deschanel]

I love it.

[Robbie]

Yeah.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I knew when I read that script, I was like, man, if this hits, it'll come around every year. And that is good real estate.

[Dax Shepard]

It joined the group of like 10.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Best incredible was such a fortunate thing.

[Dax Shepard]

So now when you were here Last time in 2022, February, your children hadn't seen it.

[Zooey Deschanel]

They still have barely seen it. Last year I offered it up and they chose to watch Die Hard instead.

[Robbie]

Cool.

[Dax Shepard]

We just watched it for the first time.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Christmas movie. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Don't judge me that I have my kids watch it.

[Dax Shepard]

No, that's okay. That's good.

[Zooey Deschanel]

They loved it. But this year my daughter was like, I'd like to watch Elf with my friends.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

With her friends.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah. Not with me. No. I'm like, I'll do a Q and A afterwards if you want.

[Dax Shepard]

Sure, sure.

[Monica Padman]

People pay money for them. I'm like, listen, does she ever say, like, mom?

[Zooey Deschanel]

Well, it took a long time because she likes to sing. I'd give her advice, she wouldn't take it.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, same.

[Zooey Deschanel]

And then finally she was like, oh, okay. Oh, that was a good note. And I'd be like, yeah, yes, Hello. Sung my whole life. Okay.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. It's like someone else probably told her, you know, your mom's like, really good. It's not just your mom saying she's good, she's actually good. It's so hard to be a parent. I'm sorry, you guys.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, if it helps, it doesn't hurt.

[Zooey Deschanel]

To be a parent.

[Dax Shepard]

Our 12 year old also wants to be a singer. Her mother is also very well known as being an accomplished singer. Zero interest in her feedback or input. She more wants, and I can relate to this, she just wants to click to peer mode where they're both just talking about music and they both get it. But the 12 year old hasn't had the education yet.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Right.

[Dax Shepard]

Have they watched anything of yours that they love?

[Zooey Deschanel]

So they like the Trolls movies because it's like I'm a voice, they're not seeing me. I think Elsie is a little More like, oh, that's kind of cool. You're in a movie. Charlie's, like, weird.

[Dax Shepard]

This is, you know, he wants you to be Mom.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah, yeah, they're good with that.

[Monica Padman]

Well, also, if you're being, like, hot in the movie.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Oh, that would be weird.

[Monica Padman]

Of course your boy.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Son is going to be like, don't do that. Yeah. How about you don't do that, Mom?

[Dax Shepard]

That's the only thing that they can't stand. Well, just the older one, the cheating aspect.

[Robbie]

Oh.

[Dax Shepard]

Likes some of the stuff we've done. But they don't want to watch. Nobody wants this. They don't want to see mom, like, in love with some other dude. Even though I love it.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Right.

[Dax Shepard]

Look how steamy this. Kisses. How'd they get this?

[Zooey Deschanel]

So growing up, my parents both worked on Twin Peaks, and my mom was on it. I remember this. There's like a part where it's supposed to be setting up that she had an affair with this other character, and he literally just kisses her arm where he's like. And I was like nine years old when this was on, and they let me watch it. Maybe it wasn't appropriate, but it was an incredible show, so I was happy. But I remember being like, this is too much. The murder was fine, but the kissing my mom's arm, not okay.

[Monica Padman]

Too intimate.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah, too much. Mary Jo, I get that.

[Dax Shepard]

I know this. I did hate. My mom has big boobs. And she would occasionally wear. Not occasionally. Kind of often. Super tight tank top, Right. And we'd go out, like, to the grocery store or whatever. And she was young. She had me when she was 23.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Oh, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I didn't mind in the house. I didn't like that. I could see dudes were like, you know, like, I could see guys clocking her, staring at her, coming over and chatting. Overly familiar. And I hated it. I just like, get out of here, guys.

[Zooey Deschanel]

That's your mommy.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

And you knew it was because of her blampers.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, because I'm a good at pattern recognition. And when she didn't wear that tank top, there wasn't as much action.

[Zooey Deschanel]

And you're like, mom, wear something different.

[Dax Shepard]

Put some baggy on. You can be tight topped at the house. I'm just like a Muslim father or an incel. Yeah. Just made me like an incel.

[Monica Padman]

I wonder if some incels come about because their moms have big blamp.

[Dax Shepard]

Big blampers that all the guys. Well, yeah, definitely. I'd see her, like, get ready to go to the mall and be like, oh, she's wearing like you did. Yeah, she's wearing tight shirt and all the lunatics are going to come out of the woodwork.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I've heard the word blamper before. I love it.

[Dax Shepard]

We were working in New Zealand.

[Monica Padman]

This is a huge ding, ding, ding. It just came up on last week's episode with your co star Jake Johnson.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Oh my God. Jake Johnson was last week?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Incredible. And you've never heard blampers? No, but when you hear the term blampers.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I know what you mean.

[Dax Shepard]

You know, right?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I feel like Jake didn't, which is bullshit.

[Zooey Deschanel]

He couldn't figure it out.

[Monica Padman]

He couldn't.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Now I bet he's using it all the time.

[Dax Shepard]

I bet he's got a shirt that says I love blampers.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I'm sure he does.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, so we never finish up. Does Jonathan. Are there ever moments where you're like, just be an LA guy and call somebody.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Oh, there's never a thing that he's not fixing himself pretty much. It never like annoys me because if he doesn't fix it himself, he'll get someone in to fix it. But sometimes it's at breakneck speed. I was like, there's somebody here already fixing the thing. Like he does everything so fast.

[Dax Shepard]

So you just love it. It sounds like you're enamored.

[Zooey Deschanel]

It's good because I don't know how to fix all those things. Yeah, he has a little list and he loves to tinker. So we have a place in New York and we were there for Thanksgiving and he spent the entire time hiding from you guys? No, he was just fixing stuff the whole time. That's like he spent an entire day fixing things.

[Dax Shepard]

Similarly, we were in Nashville for Thanksgiving. I spent the entire trip trying to figure out the pool heaters that were both broken.

[Zooey Deschanel]

He'd be obsessed.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah. It's all I did is I was draining the pool at one point.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Maybe we need to go on vacation together and you guys can just fix stuff. Pretend.

[Monica Padman]

Sounds like a horrible vacation. Just looking at what's wrong.

[Zooey Deschanel]

He'll be like, oh, there's something wrong. Let me, let me help you. Yeah. He's like, why do you call me if we have friends that need something fixed? He's like, why didn't you call me? I would have come over.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, that's true.

[Zooey Deschanel]

He'll go to neighbors houses and like weed through water and fix their thing.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, he's a hero.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Fixes all the neighbors stuff. The water thing. And I don't know what they're even called, but he fixes them.

[Monica Padman]

How far is he willing to travel? Because my home is almost ready and I surely will need. I can't.

[Zooey Deschanel]

He will. He will travel. He will travel.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

He's got a tool.

[Monica Padman]

I'm gonna make a list.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah, make a list.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. I watched a video of him walking, I guess, people through your house.

[Monica Padman]

I watched the architectural die festival and.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Me, it was a different thing. Was it in our LA house or New York, Louisiana.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, I'm presuming this was a Christmas specific video.

[Zooey Deschanel]

That's our house. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And he was showing all the Christmas decorations that apparently take six days to put up.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

And when I saw this footage, it's overwhelming. It's disconsolate, garden level. So you guys really go berserk.

[Zooey Deschanel]

We go berserk.

[Monica Padman]

It's crazy with that. Or is that all handy?

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah, well, I'm always involved in the design. When we started our really crazy decorating journey, I pulled tons of inspiration photos. Like, I wanted it to look like a vintage kind of Christmas. But then, since then, we have these guys from this place, Glitterville, come and do our house, and they do an amazing job.

[Dax Shepard]

You have the same tree. I noticed you have a fake tree That's a good 12ft tall.

[Zooey Deschanel]

It's enormous. They're all fake, which I like a real tree. But Jonathan likes to have the trees that we take in and out and then they have the lights built in. At first I was like a fake tree because growing up we always got real trees. But now I've come to love our trees. But they're decorated amazingly. Last year was Champagne, one of the trees. This year, that same tree is more like gingerbready.

[Dax Shepard]

It was very Dr. Seuss.

[Zooey Deschanel]

And then we have one tree that's super colorful. And then upstairs, each of the kids have their own trees. They can just make whatever ornaments and like, put all those, like, creative things. And they'll no doubt be, like, really fun because the kids always do fun stuff. And then Elsia has a little Christmas.

[Dax Shepard]

Tree in her room.

[Zooey Deschanel]

It's funny because growing up, our tree always had these special ornaments. Now it's more like we have this decorating. It's a little more polished. Yeah, it was all on a theme.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, it's very well balanced.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I also read, which I'm interested in because we're in the same situation. I presume one of our children wants to act. Your daughter.

[Zooey Deschanel]

They both like to perform. My daughter, she does theater, musical theater. She's a good singer and actor. And she likes to perform. It's like she openly likes it. My son break dances and he does like to do theater and stuff like that. But then he'll be like, I don't want it. And then he'll be like, oh, hey, watch this. And then he'll do like a crazy breakdancing move. Like if he were here. And I said, hey, Charlie, can you break dance? And he'd be like, no. But if he were here and we were ignoring him, he'd be like, let me show you a breakdancing move.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, watch these flips. Sounds like we have the same room in the house. Which is. Yeah, when you're an adult, go crazy, but you're not acting professionally.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Exactly. So that was my parents rule because they were in the business. They said to me, if you want to be an actor, you can get an agent and go to auditions when you're 16 and can drive yourself.

[Dax Shepard]

Right.

[Zooey Deschanel]

But you're not going to be like a child actor. And we're not taking you to set, but you can do as much theater and music stuff and whatever you want to do. We just want you to be a kid.

[Dax Shepard]

We have the same program. But then I heard you in an interview today talking about this unexpected thing that has happened, which is some of their classmates are on tv, they're in shows or they're in movies and they do leave school and audition and they're in commercials. And it is funny because my kids will be like, yeah, that's Sarah from so in some weird ways, it's very out of touch, yet they live in this house with professionals. It's very weird. It is imagined for that.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah. Elsie said to me, well, so and so did a commercial. And I'm like, okay, well, I'm not there, mom. But I also am like, do you guys want to learn a ton of lines and have thousands of dollars going out the window if you don't know them? I want you to have the experience where you can be a little more relaxed about your prep and then learn through doing theater and all that. And then by the time you're an actor, if you want to be, you're a professional who comes to set prepared. It's real thing.

[Monica Padman]

Probably the kids parents who are in the commercial. The parents are not actors. That's the thing. They don't know. Oh, you should really get a handle on it now before you need to go be professional or for them, it's exciting. Oh, my God, you're going to do a commercial.

[Zooey Deschanel]

And every kid is different. I mean, There are kids. You know, when you work with the kid actors that you're like, you were the kid that's meant to be a.

[Dax Shepard]

Kid actor, Josh Hutcherson. I'm like, so glad.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Oh, my God. I work with Josh when he was a kid too.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, you did?

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yes. He was Bridge to Cherry Theater. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes. Anna Sophia Robb, too. They were the kids in this movie. And I was like, you guys are so insanely professional. I think there's the kids that are kid actors, and I think my kids will, like, come to the place. I just also want them to want to do it.

[Dax Shepard]

I want to protect going to Northwestern with crazy outfits and not fitting in.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

That's what I want. I don't want them being famous at 18 when they're supposed to be getting their ass kicked and confused.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I want all the character building stuff.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, me too.

[Zooey Deschanel]

It's why I like drill. Make sure that we're always polite. When you go to someone's house that you're not assuming, you get, you know, it's like that you say thank you and please. You make sure they know you're happy to be there and all that stuff. I'm like, there's so much to learn without then also having to earn money, have a job because it's a real job. And sometimes even the most mature kids have a freak out on set, and I'm like, I don't want to be my kid. Yeah, I know, I know.

[Dax Shepard]

You saying that be polite made me think of this other thing that I think is hard to navigate when you have kids and you're on tv, which is I need them to know we're getting treated nicer than you're supposed to get treated. I know when you and Jonathan go to a restaurant, odds are some people there are gonna be excited you're there, and they're gonna be excited.

[Zooey Deschanel]

They might send you extra dessert.

[Dax Shepard]

Yes. I feel trapped in the situation where it's like, it's not their fault. They're real life experiences. Everywhere we go, people are more excited, but I also need to prep them for the reality of life, which is like, people are not excited to wait on you.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Well, they were so young. I was on a TV show, Jonathan was on a TV show, my sister was on a TV show, My brother in law was on a TV show. They had a friend over and they were like, what's your daddy's TV show?

[Monica Padman]

Oh, my God.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Exactly.

[Dax Shepard]

This is like standard. Every.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I go, not everybody's dad or mom.

[Monica Padman]

Believe it or not yeah, Grandpa is in the industry.

[Zooey Deschanel]

They thought everyone had a TV show and I was like, oh no. Okay, we need to make sure they know everyone has different jobs.

[Dax Shepard]

Stay tuned for more Armchair expert if you dare. Thanks again to our presenting sponsor, Audible, for their support. So Audible just dropped their best of 2025 collection, and I gotta say, this is one of those things that actually makes your life easier. Monica. Their editors have been doing the heavy lifting. We're talking countless hours of listening, heated debates, and the whole thing. They've handpicked the year's top audiobooks, podcasts, and originals across all your favorite genres. And what I love is that they're not just highlighting the giant releases, though those are in there. They've also dug up some real hidden gems. The stuff that might have flown under the radar but totally deserves your attention. I love a good recommendation. My cue is out of control, so anytime there's a curated list like this, I breathe a little easier. Two titles I'm excited about. Sunrise on the Reaping Anything Hunger Games related is an automatic ad for me and Someday now, which everyone says is incredibly warm and reflective. If you want something solid to close out the year, this is a great place to start. Check out Audible's best of 2025 and discover why there's more to imag when you listen. Go to audible.com bestof2025 we are supported by JCPenney Zachary.

[Monica Padman]

Okay, so I just ordered these king size pillows from JCPenney which were so hard to find. I was looking at a lot of places and JCPenney had them. And when they arrived I was like, wait, these feel really lux and expensive. Way more than what I paid.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, that's the thing about J.C. penney. Right now, they're a one stop shop for incredible gifts. You can grab something last minute, like even on December 22nd and it still looks like you've been planning for months. You know, I just bought a bunch of stockings for Nashville from JCPenney and an adorable Christmasy placemat with a fire engine on it and some nutcrackery. Guys creatures. There's like all kinds of fun Christmas stuff.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, I love that.

[Dax Shepard]

Whether it's beauty sets, home decor, jewelry, or fashion for the whole family, everything has that elevated I definitely splurged vibe.

[Monica Padman]

Even when you didn't, it's what they thought that counts.

[Dax Shepard]

And honestly, nobody needs to know you grabbed it at the 11th hour shop. JCP.com yes, JCPenney. We are supported by Searchlight Pictures. Is this thing on? What happens when life gives you a second chance. Is this Thing On? Is an intimate and hopeful portrait of a man navigating reinvention, reconnection and redemption in middle age. We meet Alex, played by Will Arnett, in the wake of his separation from his wife Tess, played by Laura Dern. Looking for community and Cathars, Alex stumbles into the New York comedy scene and discovers a passion and sense of purpose just as Tess embarks on her own journey of self discovery. Directed by Bradley Cooper, director of A Star Is Born and Maestro, and starring Will Arnett, Laura Dern, Andra Day and Bradley Cooper. Critics are calling it a brilliant and profound exploration of marriage that's life affirming, heartfelt and hilarious. Certified fresh on Rotten Tomatoes. I'm a sucker for a standup movie because baked into standups is the sadness that gets vulnerability. Yes, it's great. In select theaters December 19th. Get tickets today. We are supported by Audible. You know, I spend a lot of time listening. It's literally my job. But when I'm not recording the show, I'm constantly consuming audio content. And honestly, I can get pretty overwhelmed by all the choices out there. That's why I love when Audible drops their Best of the year collection. Audible's most anticipated collection, the best of 2025, is here. And let me tell you, these editors know what they're doing. They've spent countless hours listening, having heated debates, probably way more heated than Monica and I get, although that's hard to imagine. And they have handpicked this year's must Listens. What I really appreciate is that they don't just go for the obvious picks. They found hidden gems alongside the buzziest new releases. Whether you're into true crime like Monica, historical biographies like me, or something completely different, this collection has your back. I've already started into their selection, and honestly, it's like having a really smart friend curate your entire listening experience. Want to finish the year with a sure thing? Check out Audible's Best of 2025 and discover why there's more to imagine when you listen. Listen now. Go to audible.com best of the year. Okay, one thing we just grazed on last time you were here, but now I'm way more interested and I want to talk more for a minute and it's going to dry. Drive Monica crazy, but it all seems good. Adhd?

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yes. Oh, is it gonna drive you crazy?

[Dax Shepard]

Well, she rightly so. Me too. It's in your algorithm. ADHD clips. That's all anyone sees. Now everyone thinks they have it. I think I do and this is frustrating, of course, because everyone's self diagnosing.

[Zooey Deschanel]

No, I think you do.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. And I'll be honest, I now do think you do.

[Dax Shepard]

You do okay.

[Monica Padman]

But I kind of think this is part of why I don't like it. We're going to be honest here on the Christmas episode for one. So maybe you told us last time.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, she's talked about it a bunch.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

So I don't have an issue with Zoe because that's a thing that's been in your life for so long.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I was diagnosed. The thing is, is like you have a neuro psych when you're a kid and you need to be diagnosed because it's a whole thing and you have to take a really long test. It's like multiple days of testing and then they diagnose you with that and usually other learning differences. But when you're an adult, all you have to be is like, I have trou focusing when I want to do my taxes. And that's not the same as going through a battery of tests.

[Monica Padman]

Thank you. You're actually proving my point.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Right.

[Dax Shepard]

What's your take on everyone thinking they have adhd?

[Zooey Deschanel]

I just know that a lot of them aren't correct. I do feel like the way that our world is right now, it's not conducive to people being able to focus. But the thing is, ADHD isn't a problem with being able to focus. Sometimes it's focusing more than you should on things.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Obsessing.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

You always have something you're obsessed with.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yo, I'm a deep dive. Like crazy.

[Gar]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Zooey Deschanel]

But I like that about myself. And the thing about ADHD is I usually feel like a lot of actors have adhd. So I'd say if you're an actor comedian, I'm likely to think that if you say you think you do that, you probably do.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, as these memes have taken over my feed, I noticed I would answer yes to a majority of these things.

[Zooey Deschanel]

In the best way. ADHD people are like super magical and awesome. It feels like it would make sense if you said that.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. Okay. Tell me about brushing your teeth. When you brush your teeth, is that abnormally boring? Yes.

[Zooey Deschanel]

So freaking boring.

[Dax Shepard]

I think it's my most hated.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I haven't.

[Dax Shepard]

You think it's everyone, guys. Okay, here we go.

[Monica Padman]

Nobody likes brushing their teeth.

[Zooey Deschanel]

So I think the difference is it's like you don't like doing it, but you do it.

[Dax Shepard]

It.

[Zooey Deschanel]

It's excruciating. And it's why I'll be like, I need an audiobook I love to listen to while I brush and, like, doing my face products and everything.

[Monica Padman]

I'm like, But a hundred percent. By the way, this is kind of hard to do because Zoe really has it.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. But I don't have it.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I don't think you seem neurotypical to me. Yes.

[Monica Padman]

I don't think I have it. And yet I put on a podcast to brush my teeth, my face. Like, I can't, or I have to go in the other room and be doing something else. I don't. I don't think you're able. I think that's just society. We're so frantic. We're scrolling. We're doing this. We have three devices on at once. It's what we're now used to, that kind of frenetic energy. So maybe at one point I could brush my teeth, but now I can't. And I don't think that means I have adhd.

[Zooey Deschanel]

No, it doesn't.

[Monica Padman]

It just means I'm living in a headspace that this world has created. And I think you are, too. But. But he does have dyslexia, and that is sort of maybe a comorbidity.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I mean, he hasn't.

[Monica Padman]

I know.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I think he's got. I think he's part of this very wonderful club.

[Monica Padman]

I know. It is a wonderful club. But I have to say, the reason now I think you have it. You're not gonna like what I'm about to say.

[Dax Shepard]

Does I interrupt?

[Monica Padman]

Yes, Obviously, that's a thing that we've discussed here a lot, because it's like, we can't do it because obvious reasons. And yet I can see that you really, really, really can't stop. But my worry is that you are now like, well, I have adhd, so I'm just not.

[Dax Shepard]

See, that's what.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Stop.

[Monica Padman]

That's my fear.

[Dax Shepard]

I always think there's a deeper thing that people are worried about. So, yeah, I'm never gonna use ADHD as an excuse for anything. If, like, I interrupt. I still don't want to interrupt, and I'm aiming not to.

[Zooey Deschanel]

So I understand that there's different reasons why people interrupt. So people can interrupt because they come from a family where everyone interrupts. Which. Which ADHD runs the families. And, like, my whole family has adhd. My family constantly interrupting, and it's hard for me, too. But I will say that there's lots of reasons why people interrupt. But one reason why people with ADHD interrupt a lot is because you're Worried you're gonna forget what you're gonna say, and you're like, if I don't say it right now, I'm gonna forget. And it's really important, and so it can be really hard. People will think it's rude when you interrupt, but it's not. You're just so excited about what's happening. You gotta say something.

[Monica Padman]

But it's kind of rude because. Because again, and this is like brushing your teeth. I too, have thoughts that I'm like, I'm gonna forget it because I'm not gonna be able to say it right now because they're talking, and I'm just gonna have to be okay forgetting it so that everyone can have space. Talking.

[Dax Shepard]

That's the right way.

[Monica Padman]

I guess I feel like that's a sacrifice that has to be made.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Of course, there's some things that. That you don't want to be using ADHD as an excuse, but it might be an explanation totally for certain things. But again, it is a tricky space to get into where you start being like, well, that's okay. That's why I don't get anything done because I have adhd. It's like, well, no, that's not an excuse to not. You can still get stuff done. You just might have to figure out a new way or some different coping mechanisms. And I will say that because I was diagnosed so young and I had educational therapy really young, I was taught. I was in educational therapy two days a week from the time I was pretty young. And I never felt bad, bad about it or anything. I just knew some stuff was different for me. But I was taught a lot of coping mechanisms, which was so helpful. And I was never medicated. I didn't need to be medicated. I just needed some tools and to understand. I need more time than other people to do things. I need to build in more time. If I don't wake up two hours before I have to leave, I'll be like, oh, my God, running back in the house like, 40 times. I did it this morning where I was like, running back. I forgot the dang bread. My mom brought it over. I forgot the dang bread. I go back in, I'm like, oh, my God, I need my lip gloss.

[Monica Padman]

Two things you did need today, I need.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah, but it's like, that's the kind of thing I had to run back. And even then, I did wake up two hours before. I might have woken up three hours before. And I still am like, oh, you know, But I need a lot of extra time. To prep myself. Because otherwise my energy can be frenetic.

[Dax Shepard]

And chaos all over the place.

[Monica Padman]

He can say, time blindness.

[Dax Shepard]

Time blindness.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Time blindness is real. I have clocks everywhere.

[Monica Padman]

Clocks is good.

[Dax Shepard]

Do you have this self abuse, the kind where when you err, you really destroy yourself for a long time?

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yes. And we used to call it the endless tape of most embarrassing moments.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Zooey Deschanel]

My sister and I would talk about this. We're like, do you have an endless running video in your mind of like the dumbest shit you ever did? Just playing on repeat? Like you're in a place where it's just like, no, we're never going to stop this. It's always out.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, but just glance over. I can just watch it play out. Yeah, it's always back there.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Oh, that was dumb.

[Dax Shepard]

Let's talk about that again. Stuff I said when I was 8 years old.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Me too. I feel bad about things I said when I was like four.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, there's this one I think of all the time. It means nothing. I think about non stop. My mom picked me up from school one day and I decided I'm gonna sit on the floor of the car in front of the front seat. And I thought it was cool. And she was asking me about my day and I was being very aloof. Cause I was feeling like I was very cool. I just had this moment of feeling very cool. I think about that all the time. Like, how embarrassing. I was acting cool in front of my mom. She was like, what is he doing? He's sitting on the floor. He's acting like. He's like Fonzarell all of a sudden. Like I had maybe one good day at school or something. I was feeling myself.

[Monica Padman]

Maybe there's a reason you remember that, though, because that was a time I was inauthentic and I hated that feeling. I don't want to do that anymore. Yeah, there's a reason some of those stick out.

[Dax Shepard]

It's so insignificant, right?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I was acting cool and aloof and sitting on the floor. But once a week, I think about that for five minutes. Like, feel like, how do I get that out of my head? Do I apologize to my mom for this?

[Zooey Deschanel]

I'm. Hey, I remember in 84 you picked.

[Monica Padman]

Me up from school January 4th.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, let's talk about your movie.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Okay. Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

Merv.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Merv.

[Dax Shepard]

You and Charlie Cox.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

Daredevil.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

The movie starts as breaking up.

[Zooey Deschanel]

It's characters that have broken up, but they're sharing a dog and the dog is depressed.

[Dax Shepard]

He's not Taking it well. What kind of things is he not doing? He doesn't want to.

[Zooey Deschanel]

He doesn't want to go for walks or runs. He doesn't want to eat. He's like depressed.

[Monica Padman]

What kind of dog is he?

[Zooey Deschanel]

A mutt. A cute.

[Dax Shepard]

You have to do a mutt. I think in modern cinema.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah. I think they toyed with different dog. I mean what's harder is that you have to find a bunch of dogs that look just like this special mutt because they cast this dog named Gus. That's incredible.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, we love Gus.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Gus is an incredible dog actor. But then they had to cast three or four more dogs that were similar to Gus. But he's like a big terrier mix mutt. If you cast a Brussels griffon or something, they all look the same. Pre.

[Dax Shepard]

Some cuter than others, but yeah, yeah, exactly. Yeah.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Or not that they all look the same, but pretty much more or less.

[Dax Shepard]

You can get away with it in a wide shot for sure.

[Zooey Deschanel]

This was harder. They had to dye a dog beard or something. Another dog, I don't know. Because they also had to be trained dogs. They had a special dog groomer that came.

[Dax Shepard]

And how old was Gus?

[Zooey Deschanel]

I don't know.

[Monica Padman]

How long has he been acting?

[Zooey Deschanel]

He's been acting a while. He's incredibly well trained and. And honestly, like loves sausages a lot.

[Dax Shepard]

That's his. That's what he's working for. Those are the.

[Monica Padman]

See the human food. They like the human.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah. Well, they have to give him healthy treats. Cuz he gets a lot of treats. So they have to give him like healthy chicken breast. They love chicken breast.

[Dax Shepard]

They were cooking it up for.

[Zooey Deschanel]

They're cooking. They had little bags.

[Dax Shepard]

I wondered how old he was because I rented a sloth one time to come over for Kristen's birthday party.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Incredible video. How old was the sloth?

[Dax Shepard]

The sloth was 8 or 9. But as it turned out, once we met the sloth, the sloth had been an out break. It had a much better career than either of us had at the time that I hired her to come over to the house for the birthday party.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Does she still love sloth as much?

[Dax Shepard]

No, I think I kind of ruined it for her a bit.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Really?

[Dax Shepard]

Because I think, well, the world ruined the world. Like didn't know what to get her. You got some of the sloth. I think she got inundated with sloth stuff. So I think I might have tamped down maybe her.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. You know when you're a kid and it's like, oh my God, I love penguins. And then for the rest of your life, if someone sees something with a penguin, they get it for you, right? I don't really love penguins anymore. I'm 40.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Right. Well, my kids both have animal middle names, so, like, when they were babies, my daughter's Elsie otter and my son's Charlie Wolf. And it was like, stop. Wolves and otters. And Elsie goes, that's not my favorite animal. And I was like, well, it's a great animal.

[Monica Padman]

You're like, it's my favorite.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Mine.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Okay. So the dog is bereft.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Charlie's character takes the dog on a beach vacation. But then I can't let go.

[Dax Shepard]

But what is the premise of the vacation spot?

[Zooey Deschanel]

It's like a dog beach.

[Dax Shepard]

It is dog food.

[Zooey Deschanel]

It's really cute. We had all these scenes, like, millions of dogs. That was so fun and funny. They had ones where dogs are, like, riding around.

[Monica Padman]

People are gonna love.

[Zooey Deschanel]

It's a dog movie, a rom com, and kind of a little bit of a Christmas movie, too. So it's all in one. It's all in one. If any of these things appeal to.

[Dax Shepard]

You, you'd be dead inside if not one of those items of Christmas romance.

[Monica Padman]

And puppies.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah, puppies.

[Dax Shepard]

Now, the scenes with, like, 30 dogs on the beach, did it take for an eternity where there's so many dog wranglers and the little clickers.

[Zooey Deschanel]

There's varying levels of dog actors, like humans. There are scenes where they're, like, establishing dog beach. They adapt. Dogs do this and that. And there's always one dog that's like, well, I mean, Gus is a pro.

[Dax Shepard]

One and done.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Gus got this.

[Monica Padman]

Gus is a dictator.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Sometimes there will be a dog that's like a dog background actor that's not an actor, really. They're more of, like, a show dog.

[Monica Padman]

He's an actor. He's an actor. Let's be real.

[Zooey Deschanel]

So they're not as experienced. And so maybe it took a little longer, but it was good. I would say it can be challenging to act a scene. And then the dog has to do blocking. And the dog trainers are there, and they're like, go with. Go with. And then the dog's like, but there's a sausage over here. So we would always have to have sausages in our pockets to be, like, smart. I got the sausage too.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, wow.

[Zooey Deschanel]

This is a lot that's important. Cats are not as good at acting. It's not their sport. As much as I love them, they're very smart. But they're like, we do what we want to do. I had one scene on New Girl where there was a million cats on my car. And that was crazy. The cats just will not.

[Monica Padman]

They don't cooperate.

[Zooey Deschanel]

No. They're all just like.

[Dax Shepard]

Hence the term herding cats.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Herding cats is hard.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Cats just do what they want to do. They're very smart, but they do what they want to do.

[Dax Shepard]

And dogs, they want approval. They're more like me.

[Zooey Deschanel]

My cats. Cats aren't super food motivated. There aren't that many things. I have one cat that's like, no. If you have a treat, she's suspicious of you. She thinks you're trying to get her carrier to go to bed. Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

It's like, you know you're not supposed to get in the car with the stranger when they give you candy.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Intuitively not getting in the car.

[Monica Padman]

Did you feel a little stress re entering the Christmas movie space since you are in an iconic one?

[Zooey Deschanel]

Well, it happened by accident because when I read the script, I was just like, it's a cute romcom. And I didn't even, like, notice that it was sort of set during Christmas because it wasn't like the front and center thing. It's more in the realm of love, actually. Or Die Hard, where there's Christmas in the background. It's the context, but it's not about Santa Claus or elves or Christmas specific characters. And it's not a Christmas specific plot line. Just happens to have these nice little cozy Christmas vibes.

[Monica Padman]

Ooh, I like that.

[Zooey Deschanel]

That's how I ended up. But I'm like, you know what? It's great to have this little sprinkling.

[Monica Padman]

It's kind of nice.

[Zooey Deschanel]

It adds because you want to have things that take place during the time when you're reminded how important your loved ones is.

[Monica Padman]

It a tear jerker?

[Zooey Deschanel]

A little bit, but it's mainly funny. But it has a few tear jerky moments. Okay.

[Monica Padman]

For those.

[Dax Shepard]

You want a couple of tears. Jerked out. Okay.

[Monica Padman]

Jerked out.

[Zooey Deschanel]

You might have a tear removed.

[Monica Padman]

Okay, I'll let you know.

[Zooey Deschanel]

But you're not gonna be, like, crying the whole movie. There's no.

[Dax Shepard]

And Charlie Cox. There's no Death is a classic. BAE classic. Yeah. I think that'll be working for you a lot in between the cries. I think you'll be getting excited for Charlie Cox.

[Zooey Deschanel]

It's a good rom. Rom com.

[Monica Padman]

I love a rom com. A dying breed.

[Zooey Deschanel]

We need more. We need more.

[Monica Padman]

We need more.

[Dax Shepard]

They're working the marketplace.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

It's weird there's not more now. I'm gonna ask you an annoying question. I think everyone does, but because I'm friends with Jake, I just feel like clearly they're gonna want you guys to do that show again. Would you ever do that?

[Zooey Deschanel]

I would, yeah.

[Monica Padman]

So good.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I don't know if Jake would. If it were down the street from his house, he would be like, twice a week.

[Dax Shepard]

I'll give you 12 hours.

[Monica Padman]

We didn't ask him. We should have asked him.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, maybe that's what I should.

[Monica Padman]

We have to ask Max. We'll get them all.

[Dax Shepard]

We'll get them lined up if you.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Guys get them lined up.

[Dax Shepard]

But it's probably as big as it ever was when it was out.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah, I think bigger. Bigger, right. We had a huge opening, and then we were, like, fighting baseball because they had the baseball contract on Fox. We had, like, all this traction, and then they kept having to take us off for a week because baseball. And there was a lot of stuff like that where we got a little bit slowed down. And in the network TV world, it was like one of the first years that you were putting things on network Netflix, too, because they put our show on Netflix the day after it aired, so we couldn't actually always see, really, our real ratings. Because a lot of people were watching on Netflix.

[Dax Shepard]

Right.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I thought was such a smart marketing move, because then people ended up watching who missed it or weren't aware of it. They just see it up on there, so it's hard to even know exactly. And then we were on for a long time, but it felt like we were just kind of chugging along.

[Dax Shepard]

I think they're good at convincing all of us that the show's barely working. The whole six years on Parenthood, it was like, I don't know if we're going to bring you back.

[Zooey Deschanel]

All six years, the whole time, I kept being like, I think it's a really big hit. There's not a day going by people tell me it means so much to them. And then they're like, ah, I don't know. It was definitely a weird transition time in Networked Health.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. What's the name of the game in the show?

[Zooey Deschanel]

True American.

[Monica Padman]

Yes, True American. Have they made that into a real game?

[Zooey Deschanel]

They should. But one of our writers, it was a game that she played with friends in college, but it was actually just a physical game of strength. Strength. And a bunch of, like, her guy friends would, like, kind of play this. And then when they introduced it, it didn't really have instructions at first. It was like, they play True American. So we Just kind of improvised most of it to seem opaque. To seem like it was a game that was really weird.

[Monica Padman]

Had no rules made up.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah. And then people started trying to impose the rules on after the fact. Which I was like, it's kind of a dangerous thing, but kind of great.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I miss so good. Yes.

[Monica Padman]

What a great show.

[Dax Shepard]

Are we going to sing?

[Monica Padman]

I think we are.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, will you sing a song?

[Zooey Deschanel]

I will. I want to say that you guys really like willed this in. Cuz I kept trying to be like, I haven't practiced. You're like, we don't care.

[Monica Padman]

I know.

[Zooey Deschanel]

And you're like, we'll get you someone to accompany you. And I was like, well you said could you find a keyboard player? And I was like, well, I don't have time. And you're like, we got one.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. Looks you to do this.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I was like, they wanted this much. Then I'll do it.

[Dax Shepard]

It's Christmas.

[Monica Padman]

It's Christmas.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I know.

[Dax Shepard]

And I was listening to she and Him's Christmas. A very Christmas. A very she and Him Christmas. I was listening to this morning. The whole time I was researching. Yeah.

[Zooey Deschanel]

That's so cool.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

You're gonna see a DM from me that's like, I love it.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Oh wait, I'll give you my phone number because I erased Instagram from my phone. Smart. So I'm not doom scrolling all the time.

[Dax Shepard]

Smart.

[Zooey Deschanel]

It really. I have so much time now. I mean no offense to Instagram. There's lots of great things about it. But I just erased it. And I was like, you know what? Anyone who needs to get in touch with me will be able to get in touch with. And I just erased it from my phone. And I realized there's a whole world that's there. And I erased TikTok. I still watch YouTube because it's long form.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Zooey Deschanel]

And I like to like learn things. A lot of times they're like educational stuff.

[Monica Padman]

Sure.

[Zooey Deschanel]

But the doom scrolling because I spent two hours watching cat videos.

[Dax Shepard]

I know. I'm telling myself the second we don't do this show that I'm.

[Monica Padman]

I know. That's how I feel. But then it's like there's going to be something else.

[Zooey Deschanel]

But I have someone else post for me.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Zooey Deschanel]

So I'm still active and I still do all the stuff to post. Like I take pictures and stuff here.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Zooey Deschanel]

And I say what to post, but I'm not looking at. It's not affecting my time and personal life.

[Dax Shepard]

I've moved it to like the last page on My phone. So I gotta go through it. But that hasn't slowed me down in the way I was hoping.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Oh, I did so many things. I was like. And I would break through everyone. I downloaded another app that was supposed to limit it. It'd be like, you're blocked. And I just get around it. I'd be like, you have to want it.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Zooey Deschanel]

So I had to realize that for me, Instagram was and TikTok so addictive that I had to take it off my phone.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Wait, I have to ask one more thing before we sing because it just reminded me what's on your Christmas dinner table. Table.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Okay. I like chicken.

[Monica Padman]

I like chicken.

[Zooey Deschanel]

You know, like a good roast chicken.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Beautiful.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Roasted. I like a roasted potato. I love all the roasted vegetables. I love roasted beets and all this kind of winter vegetables. I like a roasted potato better than a mashed potato.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. Yeah. With skin on. Yes, Skin on.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Crispy. I like crispy. Crispy. Almost fried. Yeah, it's called roasted, but we know.

[Dax Shepard]

But it's a fried.

[Zooey Deschanel]

There's enough oil on that it's hot enough that it is basically fried. I like a good salad.

[Monica Padman]

I believe a salad belongs on the.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Table to be enjoyed. With all the roasted things. I'm not turning my nose up at any of the other Christmas meats. Or a salmon. Okay.

[Monica Padman]

Wow.

[Dax Shepard]

You were pescatarian for a minute.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I was vegetarian and then pescatarian. And then I realized I'm allergic to, like, a lot of the fake meat things. Almost every protein powder I can't eat.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, really?

[Zooey Deschanel]

This is from whey protein, which I can eat a little bit, but my fingers become cracked.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, wow.

[Zooey Deschanel]

And I noticed that when I stop eating whey protein, it goes away.

[Monica Padman]

Huh.

[Dax Shepard]

Have you tried a whey isolate?

[Zooey Deschanel]

Oh, maybe that's what I have to do. That's what you need to. Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Cuz I can't have whey and whey isolate. No problem.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Okay. You know what I can do is bone broth protein.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, that's great.

[Zooey Deschanel]

And they have like chocolate flavor.

[Dax Shepard]

Why?

[Zooey Deschanel]

Me too. Just like a regular protein powder. But I'll try the Isolip. And I can't have pea protein. I'm really allergic to that. I can't have soy protein. I'm allergic to that. Pretty much all the vegetarian things were challenging. And then I was not getting enough protein. So I now I do eat meats.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Sustainably. And then for dessert. Desserts.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I like cookies. I'm a cookie. We thought you're a cookie, Mom.

[Monica Padman]

Cookies Yeah.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Do I have one? I might have to add you. I've got a cookie group chat.

[Monica Padman]

What?

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, my God.

[Monica Padman]

That's like, recipes flowing.

[Zooey Deschanel]

No, it's all the places we've gotten good cookies.

[Dax Shepard]

That's even better for you. Yeah. Because you like to shop.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, I love shopping.

[Zooey Deschanel]

And coast meats, where you can, you know, doordash get cookies delivered.

[Monica Padman]

You know, Rob makes an incredible Christmas cookie.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Really?

[Monica Padman]

Yes. He'll have to give you the recipe. Sorry, Rob, you have to give your recipe.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Is it like a cutout cookie?

[Robbie]

No, it's white chocolate cranberry cookie.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Delicious.

[Monica Padman]

It's so good. You love him, too.

[Dax Shepard]

I even cheat a little bit.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, you cheat on your gluten.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Well, you. You might have a piece of the bread.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, you have a piece of. Yeah, yeah, I will.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I will toast it.

[Dax Shepard]

I definitely want to show my love to your mother.

[Zooey Deschanel]

You don't have. I remembered that you were avoiding the gluten, but I still brought the bread anyway.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm glad you did.

[Zooey Deschanel]

But she was like, one of them will eat it.

[Dax Shepard]

Yes, yes.

[Zooey Deschanel]

And you can share it. And you know what? If you don't think you can eat all this, slice it and then put it in the freezer. And you know that thing about the bread that when you freeze it, it.

[Dax Shepard]

Lowers its glycemic index?

[Zooey Deschanel]

It's really amazing.

[Dax Shepard]

Kristin freezes all of our bread before family eats it.

[Zooey Deschanel]

So you can do that. That's what she actually mostly does. She makes her own bread. And then we'll freeze it a lot. Smart.

[Dax Shepard]

All these sourdough people are the same. Takes over your whole life. Like, our freezer is just full of sliced frozen bread. Yeah. Yeah. We're the beneficiaries of it.

[Monica Padman]

That's right.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, we're going to sing. Yeah, we're going to sing a song.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

All right.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yes. Have yourself a merry little Christmas Let your heart be light from now on our troubles will be out of sight. Have yourself a merry little Christmas.

[Dax Shepard]

Make.

[Zooey Deschanel]

The yuletide gay from now on our troubles will be miles away. Here we are as in olden days Happy golden days of your faithful friends who are dear to us Gather near to us once more. Through the years we all will be together if the fates allow.

[Dax Shepard]

Hang a.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Shining star upon the highest bough. And have yourself a merry little Christmas.

[Dax Shepard]

Now.

[Zooey Deschanel]

And there was a cricket.

[Monica Padman]

I know, you guys. A cricket.

[Dax Shepard]

Joined in the beautiful.

[Zooey Deschanel]

It was really sweet. It was kind of like, it's nighttime now.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, the cricket.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Turns out you guys know where this song Came from? No, it was in meet me in St. Louis. And the first person to sing it was Judy Garland. And it's like, heart wrenching. Please watch.

[Monica Padman]

Yes.

[Zooey Deschanel]

She sings it and it's like, the family's gonna move away from St. Louis.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, no.

[Zooey Deschanel]

To New York City. Everyone's sad about it. And she's singing it to her baby sister to say, like, it's gonna be okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Zooey Deschanel]

It's so beautiful. Watch it. I'm crying. Tears are behind my eyes just thinking about it.

[Monica Padman]

I know you guys. That was beautiful. Thank you.

[Dax Shepard]

Thank you so much.

[Monica Padman]

Amazing.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I have one.

[Monica Padman]

No. This is how musicians are.

[Dax Shepard]

It's never, never good enough.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I don't believe in, like, not having little things that are different. You know what I mean?

[Monica Padman]

I agree. That's the beauty.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah. There was no flub. No.

[Monica Padman]

No fluffs.

[Zooey Deschanel]

We record in ways so we can't fix mistakes. So I believe in that. Like, I like, like that. Yeah. That's how we did my last record. That's how we did wolf stuff. It's just the take. Well, it sounds good.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah. The take is the take.

[Monica Padman]

The take is the take.

[Dax Shepard]

You make that perfection.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I've sung backup, or guessed it, on people's records. And I see how a lot of people do it, is that they fix every line. It sounds perfect, but it all of a sudden doesn't sound as much like, as interesting. You. Yeah. If you don't have the musical through line. Like, there's a story to that performance.

[Dax Shepard]

Yes, absolutely. That way.

[Zooey Deschanel]

With click. I. No, we don't use click ever. When you're seeing a show live. Yeah. The record clicks sometimes. I get it. I'm in a session and I'm like, okay, at least we can punch. I guess it's simple to keep everyone on the same click track. But when you see something live to click, it changes the. My insides just go, like, same.

[Monica Padman]

I don't like click. I also don't like click.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

I just don't like it.

[Dax Shepard]

She has to start with click Circle.

[Zooey Deschanel]

You don't need it.

[Dax Shepard]

You don't need it. They didn't have it before.

[Monica Padman]

They didn't have before. You guys were talking about it and.

[Dax Shepard]

They don't have Jimmy Hendrick. He wasn't using.

[Zooey Deschanel]

He was using click.

[Dax Shepard]

No, he didn't use his soul.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Nobody needs click.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm going to state the most obvious thing. It's been said all the time about your singing, but it's so. Just true, which is. It's so nostalgic.

[Monica Padman]

Like, I think I'm hearing about it.

[Dax Shepard]

The song from 70 years ago. It's. Yes. Timeless, warm.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Thank you.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Nostalgic. It kind of is bigger than in the sound somehow. I just love it. Thank you. So glad we forced you to do.

[Zooey Deschanel]

It, you know, and I'm glad that I got to work with you and I'm glad I got to sing for you guys.

[Dax Shepard]

And you'll have a little bit more spring in your Christmas step now.

[Zooey Deschanel]

I feel good and I love that song.

[Monica Padman]

Such a beautiful song.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Happy to sing it.

[Monica Padman]

Thank you, Jacob, for coming back again.

[Dax Shepard]

Again.

[Zooey Deschanel]

You're amazing.

[Dax Shepard]

All right, well, Merry Christmas to both of you guys.

[Monica Padman]

Merry Christmas.

[Dax Shepard]

This has been so fun.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Happy New Year.

[Dax Shepard]

Happy New Year. I just want to urge everyone, everyone to see Merv December 10th on Prime Video. Check it out. Unless you're allergic to adorable dogs, romcom, or Christmas. If you're allergic to any of those three, that's not for you. But if you're a human, you're going to love it.

[Monica Padman]

And revisit the she and him holiday album.

[Dax Shepard]

Pop that on.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah. We have two of them. Two.

[Monica Padman]

Revisit the two to she and him.

[Dax Shepard]

And watch MERV December 10th Prime Video. Stay tuned for more armchair expert radio, if you dare. We are supported by quints. So I'm standing in my closet the other day and I realize I'm reaching for the same three things over and over again. And they're all coming from quints. Which got me thinking, when did I become that guy who actually cares about where his clothes come from? I'll tell you when. When I discovered quints.

[Monica Padman]

Exactly. I was at a happy hour a couple days ago with a very cool woman named Margot. Very chic. And I was like, ooh, I love your pants. I love your sweater. And she's. She said, quint.

[Dax Shepard]

Boom.

[Monica Padman]

And I was like, I should have known.

[Dax Shepard]

Should have known. Turns out Quint cracked the code on something I didn't even know was broken. They partner directly with these ethical factories, cut out the middlemen. So you get the same Mongolian cashmere that cost 200 bucks elsewhere. 450, same quality, none of the markup. Perfect timing, too, because holiday shopping is coming and I actually have good answers for once. Not just clothes either. They've got home stuff, travel gear, all of it, give and get. Timeless holiday staples that last this season with quints. Go to quint.comdax for free shipping on your order. And 365 day returns. Now available in Canada too. That's Q-U-I-N-C-E.comdax free shipping and 365 day returns. Quints.comdax this show is sponsored by Better Help. The holidays are all about traditions, right? Some we inherit, others we create ourselves. And honestly, I've been thinking about what new traditions might actually serve us. Here's one I didn't see coming. Therapy as a holiday tradition. I know, I know. But hear me out. December can be intense. Family dynamics. Year end pressure. All the reflection on what went right or wrong. What if instead of just surviving the season, we used it to actually understand ourselves better? We have talked numerous times about how the holiday season can be a activating event. Yeah, you're with your family.

[Monica Padman]

Exactly. Family dynamics. Also pressure. Moms have pressure. Dads have pressure for these children. Presents I have pressure for my gift guide.

[Dax Shepard]

Better Help makes it simple to start. They've got over 30,000 licensed therapists who follow a strict code of conduct and their matching system actually works. We're talking 4.9 out of 5 stars from over 1.7 million reviews. They've helped more than 5 million people globally figure things out this December. Start a new tradition by taking care of you. Armchairies get 10% [e-mail] SL Dax that's BetterH lp.com Dax this podcast is brought to you by Squarespace, the all in one website platform designed to help you stand out and succeed online. When we were building the Armchair Expert website, Rob actually used Squarespace to get it up and running, which was a smart choice because they've got everything you need in one place to create something that actually looks professional. What really stands out is their blueprint AI feature. It's like having a design assistant that helps you build a site that doesn't look like every every other cookie cutter template out there. Answer a few questions about what you're trying to do, and it creates something that actually fits your vision. If you're someone who offers services, whether that's coaching, consulting, creative work, whatever, Squarespace handles all the business stuff too. Payment processing, scheduling, client management. No more juggling five different platforms just to get paid for what you do. The whole thing is designed so you can focus on your actual work instead of wrestling with website tech, which, let's be honest, most of us would rather avoid. So head to squarespace.com, for a free trial, and when you're ready to launch, use Code DAX to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.

[Monica Padman]

This message is brought to you by Apple Card It's a great time to apply for an Apple Card you'll love.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Earning unlimited daily cash on every purchase.

[Monica Padman]

That includes 3% daily cash when you.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Buy the latest iPhone, AirPods and Apple Watch at Apple through this special referral offer.

[Monica Padman]

When you get a new Apple card, you can earn bonus daily cash.

[Zooey Deschanel]

To qualify, you must apply at Apple Co getdailycash Apple card issued by Goldman.

[Monica Padman]

Sachs bank usa Salt Lake City.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Branch offer may not be available elsewhere. Terms and limitations apply.

[Dax Shepard]

I sure hope there weren't any mistakes in that episode, but we'll find out when my mom, Mrs. Monica, comes in and tells us what was wrong.

[Monica Padman]

Sky.

[Dax Shepard]

Merry Christmas. Look at these fun slacks you're wearing.

[Monica Padman]

Yes, I'm wearing cozy slacks. Robbie, you're gonna come sit. I'm wearing. Wearing leggings for the winter. These are leggings.

[Dax Shepard]

But they're a jog suit.

[Monica Padman]

No, this is a sweater.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, but they have a gusset and a waistband.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, they have a waistband.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, okay. So there's a difference between leggings and joggers or pants.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, these are tight. They're leggings. They're like.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, I thought leggings. What are these?

[Monica Padman]

Bike shorts.

[Dax Shepard]

Don't know where the leg is. Is like start. Starts here and ends here.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, leg warmers.

[Dax Shepard]

Maybe leggings.

[Monica Padman]

No, this. This is a legging.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

A legging is a stockings. Clothing. Oh, stockings.

[Dax Shepard]

Stockings, I think is what I wears. I. Who wears them?

[Monica Padman]

Mrs. Claus.

[Dax Shepard]

Does she wear stockings? Probably. What do people wear under their skirts? Stockings. Tights.

[Monica Padman]

Tights. Stockings are tights. They just. Right. Don't. I don't know.

[Dax Shepard]

I'll tell you this though. Mrs. Claus is, I think, generally horny.

[Monica Padman]

Okay, I looked it up. Stockings are close fitting garments covering the foot and leg from the foot to the thigh or waist. Typically made from sheer nylon, silk or other stretchable materials for fashion, warmth or medical reasons.

[Dax Shepard]

Medical reasons.

[Monica Padman]

Distinct from connected panties, hose, and also refer to large sock shaped bags for Christmas gifts. That's why I was saying Mrs. Claus, I knew stock. You know, the chimney was hung and there were stockings with care or something.

[Dax Shepard]

But that's stocking stuffers, right?

[Monica Padman]

Whatever.

[Robbie]

Those aren't. Those aren't leggings though. Those are like two.

[Monica Padman]

These are leggings.

[Robbie]

They are leggings.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

See? Good. I'm glad you had the same.

[Robbie]

I thought I was on your side.

[Dax Shepard]

When I was saying this.

[Robbie]

Otherwise I wouldn't have brought it up.

[Dax Shepard]

What did you think leggings were?

[Robbie]

I just tighter versions of that.

[Dax Shepard]

And all the way up. Like a pant. I know they are.

[Robbie]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

For Some reason leggings in mind didn't have a waistband and pockets.

[Monica Padman]

There's no pockets.

[Dax Shepard]

I know, but, you know, you could have pockets.

[Monica Padman]

No, leggings have a waistband. They're all the way up like you have Lululemon leggings.

[Robbie]

They're elastic.

[Monica Padman]

Elastic. This is.

[Dax Shepard]

This is. Do they call them Lulu leggings?

[Monica Padman]

They should. Okay, well, it's our Christmas episode for the core team. Here he comes. The reindeer.

[Dax Shepard]

People complain. Yeah, I know we're over, but people complain.

[Monica Padman]

What are you doing?

[Dax Shepard]

But now it's evolved to just.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, my God. People complained.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. I didn't do it last year.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, last year.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Somehow I forgot to do Elvis last year.

[Monica Padman]

That is shocking.

[Dax Shepard]

And four people complained, and a million people were grateful. So I'm gonna definitely make.

[Monica Padman]

So you bridge the gap.

[Robbie]

I thought you meant people complain that you would do it and you're gonna do it anyways.

[Dax Shepard]

So you would imagine that would be a complaint. But I have to say, I've never really read that complaint. And people are willing. They're free flying with their complaints, as we know.

[Monica Padman]

Sure.

[Dax Shepard]

You know that.

[Monica Padman]

I. We all know that.

[Dax Shepard]

So can we ask what everyone's success rate was? Because I've been very unsuccessful with our gifts. Yeah. Like shipping.

[Monica Padman]

I was. Okay, I'll go first. Ladies first.

[Dax Shepard]

Ladies first.

[Monica Padman]

I was very nervous about one of them. It was. I ordered it over a week ago from a place that's very close by. So that was a mistake. I should have just gone. When I called, they were like, oh, we could have just messengered it to you. And I was like, okay, I wish I knew that. And it wasn't coming. It wasn't coming. And then I kept getting the FedEx stickers where it came and left and came and left.

[Dax Shepard]

It required a signature.

[Monica Padman]

Yes. And I kept trying to change it, and I couldn't change it.

[Dax Shepard]

Outlaw signature required. It's my number one grievance.

[Robbie]

Do you ever try signing it and then writing on it? Please leave this.

[Monica Padman]

I have done it doesn't work. It doesn't work. They have to follow the law.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, they're not willing to lose their job over making you happy. And I wish you could declare on FedEx and UPS and USPS see that? I'm like, I'm done.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I don't give a if it's stolen.

[Monica Padman]

I think instead of it defaulting to it is a signature. It should default to. There's no signature. And you click it. If you are someone who's like, I need. Need this.

[Dax Shepard]

I think Whoever you bought it from, they like to require signatures so that they don't ever get blamed.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, that's what, that's what it is. But I'm saying it should be reversed. So anyway, it, I, I canceled an appointment to stay at home on the day that I was like, it's supposed to arrive today.

[Dax Shepard]

You sat at home all day long.

[Monica Padman]

I did. And it did arrive, thank God. So I think sign for it.

[Dax Shepard]

It makes me think of the guy who knocks on the door and then they pull it open and he's still holding the handle. In vacation, Christmas vacation, he's holding the, the gift from his boss he's been waiting for, but somehow he's holding, he's like cling, cling, cling. And then when they open, he's like holding Matt in the wreath. I think he like, I'm sorry, forgot to do this.

[Monica Padman]

Your favorite movie?

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, Christmas movie.

[Monica Padman]

Your favorite Christmas movie.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Well, my situation was I ordered you a bunch of things that were coming from Yawk Yawk Yawk. Oh, and Newark New Airport. Newark.

[Robbie]

The Newark Airport.

[Dax Shepard]

And I had loads of time when I ordered it, they were going to be here like two weeks ago. That's an exaggeration. A week and a half ago.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

And then it was like, hey, it's going to be later. It's going to be later. Then hey, we're not even going to send one of these things. Like we can't find this. Yeah, that's done.

[Monica Padman]

Was it a limited edition item?

[Dax Shepard]

Well, it's a no addition item.

[Monica Padman]

I really want it.

[Dax Shepard]

They had it on their website, but they didn't have it in their stock room. So. Okay. So I ordered those and those are ironically, if we believe the app is going to be here at 2:30.

[Monica Padman]

Oh wow.

[Dax Shepard]

That's exactly when we're done recording. After all this, me watching it every day and tracking it every day, stressful. But then even worse, and this is my fault, and this applies to both of you, is then I then ordered a lot of stuff off Amazon and what I, it's my fault. I gotta double check when I order stuff.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Cuz I order stuff to Tennessee so much.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Oh yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

So yesterday I started getting all those alerts you get from Amazon, like in your email. Deliver, deliver, deliver. And I'm like, great. I go outside, nothing there. I'm like, what the fuck? Open up to take a picture. That's. That's Mount J. Juliet.

[Monica Padman]

Oh shit.

[Dax Shepard]

So about five things are in Nashville for you. Three things for years, but yours were just cute things to make this thing better. But it is heartbreaking because I really thought it was something cute. So anyways, I entered this having really failed, and I'm ashamed and embarrassed.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

That I failed everyone.

[Monica Padman]

Now, are you going to tell us what they. Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

So that's my question. Your shit gets here, you know, after we stop recording our next guest.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

But I feel like I should tell you.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Robbie]

You just like write on a piece of paper or print enough picture of it.

[Dax Shepard]

I know if I just hand you my phone and I'm like from. Here's a clue from Bergdorf.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, shit.

[Dax Shepard]

Just hand you a.

[Monica Padman]

That is from Newark Airport. Exciting. Oh, no, I, I, this is great. That means I have presents to come.

[Dax Shepard]

You do. And then also when I return home from Christmas vacation. Yeah. I'll be bringing back all this stuff. And I'm going to describe to you some of the cute things I got.

[Monica Padman]

And Rob, how did it go for you?

[Robbie]

Mine was good. One of them's a big swing.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Oh, it's exciting.

[Monica Padman]

Which one?

[Dax Shepard]

It'll be obvious.

[Robbie]

Yeah, it'll be obvious.

[Monica Padman]

What if it's a boyfriend?

[Dax Shepard]

What if it's. What if it's a mold of his penis?

[Monica Padman]

Wow, that is a big swing.

[Dax Shepard]

Figuratively and literally. I heard from Natalie. So who goes first? The youngest. How do we do it?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, Rob should go first.

[Robbie]

All right, well, I. Mine's two part, so I'm going to view your gift.

[Monica Padman]

No, you receive first. Yeah, you should receive first. Do you want to receive from Dax or I. Ooh, big question.

[Robbie]

I, I just close my eyes and point so that I don't have to pick at random.

[Dax Shepard]

Youngest goes first.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

So, yeah, give them your prayer present.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

Give Robbie his present. There's writing. There's writing on the back of that card.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Robbie]

Ooh, that's a good sign. This gift is in honor of friend of the pod, Curtis Duffy.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, sneaky mouse. Sneak, sneak. What was that? Squeak, squeak.

[Robbie]

It's in a Nikki Kehoe box.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

That's a red herring.

[Robbie]

That's nice wrapping paper, too. Nice and thick.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, that's paper Source or a reused app. Yeah, put that in a pile.

[Monica Padman]

It's a gift within a gift.

[Dax Shepard]

I love how many grandmas would go home from Christmas with a bunch of wrapping paper?

[Zooey Deschanel]

I know.

[Monica Padman]

And it's all creased up. I don't get it.

[Dax Shepard]

It's not great.

[Robbie]

So we've got a Max and Helen's hot sauce.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

That's from your new favorite place.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yes.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. Update. I got in.

[Dax Shepard]

You got. She Got. Got in.

[Monica Padman]

And it was so good. It was so good. I panicked as soon as I sat down that I was never going to be able to get back in. So I was like, gotta order so many things.

[Dax Shepard]

We saw you post meal at Lily's and when you were saying everything you ordered at one point, I was like, well, four of them must have got in. And I was like, how. How many folks went? Just you and Jess.

[Monica Padman]

Just me and Jess.

[Dax Shepard]

You got about seven entrees, right?

[Monica Padman]

We got five. Or a tuna melt. Highly recommend the tuna melt. Oh, my God, it was so good.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, my tuna melt.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, my tuna.

[Zooey Deschanel]

We agree.

[Dax Shepard]

Tuna melt doesn't sound appetizing. Even though it can be appetizing because.

[Monica Padman]

You don't like fish in general. I think. I think to a lot of people, tuna melt sounds nice.

[Dax Shepard]

Melted fish.

[Monica Padman]

It's not. The fish itself isn't melted. There's cheese on it that's melted.

[Dax Shepard]

I know, but tuna melt?

[Monica Padman]

Your bias on your.

[Robbie]

There's cheese on the tuna melt.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yes.

[Monica Padman]

That's what. You've never had one.

[Dax Shepard]

You've never had a tuna melt.

[Robbie]

I don't like tuna either.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Oh, my God.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. Not for either of you, maybe.

[Dax Shepard]

No, I do like a tuna fish.

[Robbie]

Well, I like. I think you love.

[Dax Shepard]

You can tuna guitar, but you cannot tuna fish.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

Highly recommend the tuna melt. We got a ham and cheese omelette. That was an addition at the end.

[Dax Shepard]

I wanted it now really quick. I would never, ever order an a ham and cheese omelette from a place I've heard is great. Because how the fuck can you make it better? Like a ham, eggs, ham and cheese.

[Monica Padman]

No, it was. It was.

[Dax Shepard]

It was several standard deviations.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, because the typ of ham, they were using very thin.

[Robbie]

Fluffy egg too.

[Monica Padman]

Fluffy egg. The cheese, I think was gruyere. That was a last minute add on. That was like, okay, we've eaten, but we gotta try the ham and we gotta try it. Okay, so we got a matzo ball soup. Amazing. We got a. Oh, we got a toast. No, we got an egg sandwich. Like the breakfast sandwich sandwich. They upsold us on the waffle. We were not gonna get a waffle, but they were like, do you want a waffle? Just like start.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

And we were like. I was like, do we need to get that? And he was like, we're known for our waffles.

[Robbie]

Was it that good?

[Zooey Deschanel]

So good.

[Monica Padman]

I was so glad we had it. And I don't even love. I don't even like waffles. I like them, but I'm never ordering them. I'm never ordering them. I'm normally gonna go pancake over waffle. Oh, and then hot chocolate. They're known for their hot chocolate. It's called Lily's hot chocolate.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, my goodness.

[Robbie]

And because Lily is Phil's daughter.

[Monica Padman]

That's right. She runs and owns it with her husband. She was there. And then. And then an egg cream. Do not sleep on the egg cream.

[Dax Shepard]

Tell me what an egg cream is.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, my God.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, boy.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, my God.

[Dax Shepard]

Do you need a second set of leggings?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, I need to go. I'm going to get stockings. Then you'll really see stuff.

[Zooey Deschanel]

This will see through.

[Monica Padman]

Do you know about egg creams?

[Robbie]

I don't think so.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. They're a drink. They come in like a milkshake glass and. But they. It's kind of like a milkshake.

[Dax Shepard]

It's like a 50s thing, right?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Robbie]

Eggnog.

[Monica Padman]

No, it's like a milkshake mixed with a seltzer. Kind of like it's. It's almost bubbly. It's very light.

[Dax Shepard]

Light.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, my God. It was so good. It was. Jess got it and I took a sip and I was like, oh, no, I need one on the way out.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

But I was so full. I didn't get one on the way out, but it was. Don't sleep on that vanilla. We got vanilla. There's also a chocolate.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. That's what. Of all the things you mentioned, that's what has me most excited to go there.

[Monica Padman]

The egg cream.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Zooey Deschanel]

It's so good.

[Dax Shepard]

Because I don't. I've never had an egg cream.

[Robbie]

Well, can you talk about the waffle some more?

[Monica Padman]

Sure.

[Dax Shepard]

What kind of waffle?

[Robbie]

What's up with the waffle?

[Monica Padman]

It was.

[Dax Shepard]

I love a wall.

[Robbie]

I do, too.

[Dax Shepard]

Swear words.

[Monica Padman]

It had, like, a yummy butter on top.

[Robbie]

It had, like, crispy.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, it was crispy. It was crispy, but also thick and.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Somehow fluffy in the middle. But crispy.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Robbie]

That's the best kind.

[Monica Padman]

It was amazing. Anyway, Highly recommend. I. It's. I know it's so annoying because it's 1800 hours, the weight, but best 1800.

[Dax Shepard]

Hours you could ever spend.

[Monica Padman]

I was happy that you're. You're at a risk for these restaurants that you go in and it's going to be like, oh, it's like high futin. Diner food, which is not what you want. When you go to a diner, you want diner food. And it was. It was like classic diner food. But everything just tasted better than it would at a regular diner, so. Man, oh man. Anyway, the hot sauce. We got the hot sauce too. Oh, we got home fries that came. Came with the hot sauce and it was so good. So they sell that. All right.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, next present.

[Robbie]

And some of Mindy's hot chocolate. Incredible scene.

[Dax Shepard]

Has her own.

[Robbie]

No, this is Mindy from Chicago.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, oh, okay. She has.

[Robbie]

It was a restaurant we all went to that was amazing. And she moved into bakery.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, okay.

[Robbie]

And makes incredible hot chocolate and cookies and. And baked goods and let's see. Some caramel. Salted caramels.

[Monica Padman]

Caramel caramels.

[Robbie]

Salted caramels.

[Monica Padman]

Please pronounce it correctly.

[Dax Shepard]

Duck butter caramels. From where?

[Robbie]

What is.

[Monica Padman]

It's just French. I don't know. These are from Bucatini, a really cute little shop in Echo park. And everything there is so cute.

[Robbie]

I love salted caramels.

[Monica Padman]

I know that about you now.

[Dax Shepard]

Are you saying caramel for her? What would you normally say? Salted.

[Robbie]

I honestly. Yeah, I bounce back.

[Dax Shepard]

That's.

[Monica Padman]

I think what you said. Caramels. Immediately off. Right off the.

[Dax Shepard]

So I saw you.

[Robbie]

But I think, I think I feel pretentious if I say caramel.

[Dax Shepard]

Me too.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Wow.

[Monica Padman]

I find that so counterintuitive and I like it.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Yeah. Caramel.

[Robbie]

Oh, these are nice.

[Monica Padman]

Some serving spoon.

[Robbie]

Spoon.

[Monica Padman]

Cuz Rob is a. I don't know if people can tell this is a food packaged gift.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Robbie]

These are all great, great food items. And then a card.

[Zooey Deschanel]

There's a card.

[Robbie]

Oh, ever in Chicago. Thank you.

[Monica Padman]

A meal forever. But I don't know when you're gonna go because I don't know when he's.

[Dax Shepard]

Down with Chicago, just like you now, he calls LA home.

[Robbie]

Well, that's true.

[Monica Padman]

But he's still gonna go.

[Robbie]

No, I go. I just don't go during the high traffic times.

[Monica Padman]

Yes. I reached out to them and I told them the situation and I said, he's not going to be there for the holidays. But when he's there next, can he reach out and can we do this? And they said, awesome.

[Robbie]

Well, thank you.

[Monica Padman]

You're welcome.

[Robbie]

What restaurant ever. Curtis's restaurant.

[Monica Padman]

Curtis's restaurant.

[Dax Shepard]

I'd go, I don't even care about going to eat there. I'd go just in hopes of seeing him.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Cuz I liked him so much.

[Monica Padman]

Great man.

[Dax Shepard]

He was a good boy.

[Monica Padman]

Remember when he taught us so about that in a martini glass or some sort of appetizer. But then he puts this very thin piece of sugar or something on top.

[Zooey Deschanel]

And then there's something.

[Monica Padman]

So it looks like it's floating. Do you guys remember that?

[Dax Shepard]

I mostly remember the family side. I mean, that's the memorable.

[Monica Padman]

That was a big part of that.

[Dax Shepard]

That's what I want to see.

[Monica Padman]

I mainly remember the sugar.

[Robbie]

Thank you.

[Monica Padman]

You're welcome. Okay, now, Rob. Oh, we want to go around again.

[Robbie]

Round again.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, that makes kind of sense.

[Robbie]

I have a lot of siblings, so.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, why don't you go.

[Dax Shepard]

So you're the next oldest and I'll open from Rob. What if like I just. Now I tell you. Well, that's not.

[Robbie]

I gotta. There's something first before you open that.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Oh, I think mine is the big screen.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Robbie]

All right, you ready?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, he's gotta go away. What if it's living?

[Zooey Deschanel]

Oh, my God.

[Dax Shepard]

Stay tuned for more Armchair Expert if you dare. We are supported by Zip recruiter. Oh, get recruited. So I was cleaning out my garage recently. You know, that annual ritual where you pretend you're going to organize everything, but really just move piles around. And I found this old laptop from like 2015. Tried to fire it up and it was painful, painfully slow. Made me realize how much technology has actually improved in just a few years. So if you haven't tried ZipRecruiter lately, you're going to want to check it out. And if you're new to ZipRecruiter, you can try it for [e-mail] Dax their matching technology has gotten crazy good. It actually shows you how many qualified candidates are in your area for whatever role you're trying to fill. Plus, they've upgraded their resume database so that you can instantly access candidates contact info. No more waiting around hoping someone will respond to your job posting. See how ZipRecruiter's new hiring innovations are changing the game? 4 out of 5 employers who post on ZipRecruiter get a quality candidate within the first day. And right now, you can try it for [e-mail] Dax Again, that's ziprecruiter.com Dax ZipRecruiter. The smartest way to hire.

[Monica Padman]

Wait a minute. This would be a big swing.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, my God. There's something on screen. What? There's a video.

[Gar]

Monica, this is your dream. No, a little bit about me. I am caring. I care a lot. No, no, no.

[Dax Shepard]

It's just the horn face.

[Gar]

I'm ruggedly handsome.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Oh, my God.

[Gar]

I'm an intellectual. I know a lot about a lot of stuff. I have a very high you. I even have a Ph.D. does he? Quite cultured then.

[Robbie]

You wanted a boyfriend.

[Gar]

I think of myself as having an evolved masculinity. I've got a lot. I'm heavy breasted. And by that I don't mean that I have big boobs, but I have a lot of boobs. I know, but it's still somehow masculine or at least bovine. I think of myself as being very comfortable with women in power. As a matter of fact, I prefer women to be in power. I prefer them to be whipping me. In fact, I love to support.

[Dax Shepard]

I knew turn was gone.

[Gar]

I think of myself as a, as a brawl, as just a. A big intergalactic bra. I am well over six feet tall.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, I love feet.

[Gar]

Seven feet. In fact. I don't own a dog. I cannot stand dogs. I'm a cat person. I am a kitty cat person. I have a. I mean, I'm a little bit country and I'm a little bit rock and roll. What I'm looking for is a caretaker.

[Dax Shepard]

He's actually getting me there.

[Gar]

I want somebody to, to, to. To change me.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, you did a good job telling.

[Gar]

Him what I want to change my, my, my bedding and also my pants. I'm currently unemployed and I am unemployable. I've been told that I'm morbidly obese and I, I can't stop smoking. I've been smoking by. I, I've. That is a, that is a do or die. I have to smoke cigarettes almost constantly and I also smoke cigars at the same time.

[Dax Shepard]

At the same time.

[Gar]

And you know, I, I'm willing to move in. I'll give it a shot.

[Dax Shepard]

I'll come.

[Gar]

I own a ferret. And you know, I don't know if you've seen the movie Beast Master, but you can think of that. So I'm just a beast master bra.

[Robbie]

Fair.

[Gar]

Unemployable, morbidly obese guy. But anyway.

[Monica Padman]

Wow.

[Gar]

I can't wait to meet you, Monica. I cannot wait to meet you. I think you know me as.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, my God.

[Gar]

He's in the full regalia.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Oh.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, he just blew a kiss.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, wow. Wow. It's good that we heard him before we saw him. It's kind of like Beauty and the Beast. You want to, like, get to know his spirit first.

[Monica Padman]

It's true.

[Dax Shepard]

Before you see the horns and the mini breasts.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, that's fantastic.

[Dax Shepard]

Wow. Rock. And then that's his genitals. That's one of his seven penises.

[Monica Padman]

Well, that was fantastic.

[Dax Shepard]

I. Oh, it's core wrapping paper. Ish is. I mean, not officially branded, but there's demons on it.

[Monica Padman]

Demons.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Well, that.

[Monica Padman]

That was really something.

[Dax Shepard]

That's incredible. You always outdo yourself, Gar.

[Monica Padman]

I mean, I don't know. Guess what? He's funny.

[Dax Shepard]

He's really funny. And he's clearly quite smart.

[Monica Padman]

He's a PhD.

[Dax Shepard]

He said.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, pretty huge dick.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Oh, wow.

[Dax Shepard]

Is that a thing?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, it's from friends. But if he loves friends, that's better.

[Dax Shepard]

Than a pretty huge dick or PhD. That was great, cuz. I was distracting her. You do? No, no.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Oh my God.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, God.

[Monica Padman]

Let's talk about a big swing.

[Dax Shepard]

What do we have?

[Robbie]

So these are his utters.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, he sent them.

[Robbie]

He sent his sack of penises.

[Dax Shepard]

Whoa. I was joking so many times.

[Monica Padman]

I'm like. I'm afraid to touch it.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, don't be. Don't be.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, and a really like a cute little action figure.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Oh, wow. You know me so well.

[Robbie]

One of his sacks that he wears.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh my God. This is.

[Monica Padman]

This is.

[Robbie]

This is an actual.

[Dax Shepard]

That's going to look beautiful in your new house. Maybe above your bathtub. Your new bathtub. Wow.

[Monica Padman]

So he wears this on his.

[Dax Shepard]

Around his penis?

[Robbie]

No, it's around his genitals. Because I think sub sprays out of them during the show.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, they're. They're functional.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Oh, my God.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, yeah, sure.

[Dax Shepard]

They've been used.

[Monica Padman]

They've been used. Yeah. Oh, my gosh. Well, thank you, Rob. This was quite a gift. Oh, my. We might need to hang.

[Dax Shepard]

Put it in. We have a red band over all of our YouTube.

[Monica Padman]

Well, that was great.

[Dax Shepard]

Wow. Exciting.

[Monica Padman]

Thank you. What an experience.

[Dax Shepard]

Am I the next oldest?

[Monica Padman]

Yes, you are.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. Are these both for me?

[Monica Padman]

Yes. That one's from me.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Open. From Rob.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

Maybe because it's close.

[Dax Shepard]

Closest.

[Monica Padman]

He's youngest and he's youngest.

[Dax Shepard]

We honor youth here.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah, we do.

[Monica Padman]

I like that ribbon.

[Robbie]

That's paper Source too.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, paper. My grandmother sponsor us.

[Dax Shepard]

Save the out of that. It's gonna be blue. I gotta open it for the first time where the tape is. Oh, it's already been open. Okay. Fluor de Mallow Mall. Speaking of stockings. That's what I thought. Stockings.

[Monica Padman]

Speaking of big swing. What is happening? Florida mall is a very nice.

[Dax Shepard]

Bless it. What is Flor de Mall?

[Monica Padman]

It's a. It's a lingerie company. Beautiful lingerie company. Yeah.

[Robbie]

Oh, it's a. Rob, it was a red hairy.

[Zooey Deschanel]

What is it now?

[Dax Shepard]

I'm sad and you're sad and mad.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Oh, Rob.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, Rob.

[Dax Shepard]

God's true cashmere. A button down. I don't have anything.

[Monica Padman]

It's beautiful.

[Dax Shepard]

Of these kind with that aren't flannel.

[Monica Padman]

Oh. It's black and it's.

[Dax Shepard]

And it's beautiful.

[Monica Padman]

It's gorgeous.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, my God. My God. Rob, did you sell your house? Are you homeless? This is really beautiful. Whoa. With the purple buttons?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, the purple buttons are lovely.

[Dax Shepard]

What do they call the gems? They're stones. They're rocks. There's something very special about the buttons on these.

[Robbie]

I think Brad Hand makes the buttons.

[Dax Shepard]

He does? Yeah. Oh, my heavens. Rock Rob. Thank you. Beautiful. Oh, my goodness. Okay, Rob, next. My present.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

All right. So you're going to want to open it like this. You're going to want to remove that piece and then peel it back.

[Monica Padman]

The diorama, it has a pretty. It has a face.

[Dax Shepard]

And it was going to be a spectacular diorama. But a lot of the items made their way down to Nashville. Uh.

[Robbie]

Oh, I see. Oh, San Francisco and Chicago.

[Dax Shepard]

It says Levi's on the front. That's Levi's Stadium. In the gold dots is front row tickets. Amazing.

[Robbie]

Thank you.

[Monica Padman]

I can't see anything.

[Robbie]

It's the Bears. The closest they get to LA is San Francisco.

[Dax Shepard]

And he'll be there over Christmas.

[Robbie]

And we're gonna be right there.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, that's awesome.

[Robbie]

Calvin and I are gonna road trip from Tahoe to San Francisco.

[Dax Shepard]

Can I tell you what was gonna be so cute? So I ordered bobbleheads. So I had a Chicago Bears bobblehead that was gonna be in the end zone and then a 49ers bobblehead. And then I found a Elliot, who I think Rob looks so much like Elliott from E.T.

[Monica Padman]

Oh.

[Dax Shepard]

With his little E.T. and that was gonna be Calvin and Rob sitting on the front row of that stadium. But those are all on my porch.

[Robbie]

This is amazing. Thank you much.

[Dax Shepard]

So welcome. Wow.

[Monica Padman]

I love it. Cute. That took you did some printing.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

It was going to be really great with the bobbleheads, but we get the picture.

[Robbie]

Thank you.

[Dax Shepard]

You're welcome.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

You're the next youngest from you. Okay. I don't even know how to pronounce it, but your friend Cali knows how to.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

So I basically bought you the entire line of Lowell Loewe candles.

[Zooey Deschanel]

What?

[Dax Shepard]

Yes. Minus the one they didn't have in stock.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

But it's a whole array.

[Monica Padman]

Wow.

[Dax Shepard]

And then I got you like. I got you wick trimming things. They're in Nashville. I got you cute little mice that holders. I got you this really cool antiquey thing that's both a snuffer outer and a lighter.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, my.

[Dax Shepard]

For the candles. So it's a one stop candle extravaganza for your house.

[Monica Padman]

My goodness. Loewe makes the best candle.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm such a philistine. I text her and said, does Monica like diptyque candles? I was like, gonna get you a bunch of those really nice diptyques. And she said, and I think this is her being nice. She's like, she does. And she also like, loves whatever. I'm like, got it. Definitely pick the other one.

[Monica Padman]

Wow.

[Zooey Deschanel]

She's good.

[Dax Shepard]

Good.

[Monica Padman]

She's good. Oh, my. Thank you. They're very special candles.

[Dax Shepard]

Cucumber, tomato. The beeswax was the one that was in there. That was one I was most excited about.

[Monica Padman]

Beeswax. That's all right. I don't. That sounds boring.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. Okay.

[Robbie]

Like kill a bunch of bees to.

[Dax Shepard]

Make it school homework.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Fun.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, I can't wait.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, 2:30, you'll have.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, my gosh. I can't wait. Great. Okay. Now you from me.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

And also yours says something on the back of your little card too.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay. Did you draw this picture?

[Monica Padman]

I wish. But I thought of you because it's a muscular man.

[Dax Shepard]

It's a muscular man. It appears to be a dumbbell.

[Monica Padman]

Yep.

[Dax Shepard]

On the bottom.

[Monica Padman]

And on Rob's card it was an orchestra man.

[Robbie]

Because Rob likes music with the triangle.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Ed grimley style. Okay. 2 Dax. This gift is in honor of friend of the pod, Brad P. You know what's funny though? Weren't we just saying the other day is like, you get. You. You liked an elephant once. Like, my father likes elephants. So every single present he ever got, you were saying it about your dad. Penguin. Penguin.

[Monica Padman]

This is what happened. Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Now I want to counteract that narrative with if everyone's just like, he loves God's true. I ain't complaining.

[Robbie]

That was. That was for this episode. It was Zo talking about otters for their daughter.

[Monica Padman]

That's.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, it was good. Ding, ding, ding.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I mean, this wrapping paper's like cloth. Is it God's true credit?

[Monica Padman]

It is. It is. So you should keep it. I'm a tiny bit worried you have it. And if you do, we'll figure it out.

[Dax Shepard]

I do not.

[Monica Padman]

You don't. I thought the red was really nice.

[Robbie]

Yeah, that's what I was scared of too. I was like, can't get a flannel.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Because I don't know which ones he has.

[Monica Padman]

I thought that would look very nice on you.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm gonna cut Wood in this. Cause that's a very masculine lumberjack.

[Monica Padman]

It does. It looks lumberjack, but it's. It's God's truth.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, it's for a sissy lumberjack like me.

[Monica Padman]

Exactly. It's for a Hollywood lumberjack.

[Dax Shepard]

Gentleman lumberjack.

[Robbie]

You.

[Zooey Deschanel]

God, you got two new gods.

[Monica Padman]

True.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, my gosh. What a win, win, win.

[Monica Padman]

And we didn't even talk about about it. What if we had gotten the same one? I would have.

[Robbie]

What if he got you the same thing?

[Dax Shepard]

You're always trying to put a positive spin on everything during presents. You're like, great, I have one that I can spill on. Oh, my God, you guys. I feel not worthy of these beautiful presents.

[Monica Padman]

I don't either. I definitely don't feel worthy of this penis.

[Dax Shepard]

The tri penis. It's a quality top.

[Zooey Deschanel]

It's a quad tripenis top.

[Monica Padman]

Wow, guys, good job.

[Dax Shepard]

I love Christmas.

[Monica Padman]

I love Christmas. It's so fun.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Love it.

[Monica Padman]

But I do want to. I want to see.

[Dax Shepard]

You want to bring it down.

[Monica Padman]

I do. No, I want to. I want to be grateful. We got a huge honor a couple days ago.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, my gosh.

[Monica Padman]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

We got a Christmas miracle.

[Monica Padman]

We really did. We. We as a team are nominated for Golden Globe for this very show. Who could have imagined eight years ago?

[Dax Shepard]

And I just want to say, because if by some strike of lightning we win, this will not be in the speech we have. We're here for two reasons. We got this for two reasons. The insane vulnerability of our guests. Yes. Like, that's the gift.

[Monica Padman]

100%.

[Dax Shepard]

Big deal. We could be being vulnerable all day long and people like, suck one, suck.

[Monica Padman]

One of the four.

[Dax Shepard]

And then equal to that is how many people listen and share and love and talk about.

[Monica Padman]

It's the listeners. And they.

[Dax Shepard]

You guys gave me my first nomination.

[Monica Padman]

It's so nice. It's the listeners. They. They. They're with their loyal. And we're so grateful, and they keep us going.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. I do want to share the moment because it's a very funny. While it was happening or right after it happened, I'm like, yeah, definitely going to remember this for the rest of my life. Which is, you know, I have this ironclad morning routine. Well, I go to bed on Sunday and I know these announcements come out at 5am I know we're on the list of 25 that are eligible. I did some round tables and stuff and participated in the whole.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, we did a press conference.

[Dax Shepard]

Did a press conference. So I know 5am tomorrow morning, this news comes out. So I wake up on Monday. And I am already committed. Like, we're not deviating from our routine. Like, that would a be bad luck. And I'm superstitious.

[Monica Padman]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

So I do the. I make the coffee. I do the meditation. I do the journal. So now a good hour's gone by, and always on Monday. Then I turn as soon as I put my journal down. I then grab my phone and I go through the clips Rob sent, and I post whatever Monday's episode is. And I put my journal away, and I looked at my phone, and my heart, like, literally skipped a beat where I was like, oh, my God, man. I'm going to look at the phone, and there's either going to be 40 messages, text messages, or zero text messages as normal. In the morning, in that moment before grabbing that phone, knowing it was going to be that obvious was the most specific, weird feeling ever. And more anxiety. I'm a pessimist, so more anxiety than excitement. And then I picked it up, and I opened it up, and I saw, like, right away I had, like, I don't know, 15 or 20 text messages, and I immediately just cried, like, five or six tears of, like, relief and joy inhalation, and I just can't believe it.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And then I start looking at the text, and the first one is you. And I'm like, oh, my God. Monica was up at 5 because you were up at, what, 4:50?

[Monica Padman]

Okay. Yeah. So I didn't. Yes. Same situation. I know it's coming. I had already talked to Wondry. Shout out, Wondry. Thank you.

[Dax Shepard]

Yes.

[Monica Padman]

I had been talking to them, and they were like, okay, so if it happens, could you guys maybe do a little video? And we were like. And, you know, I said, sure.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

And I said, you know, just, we're not gonna be up at 5.

[Dax Shepard]

That was the email change.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, we're not gonna be up at 5, but, like, we'll do it in some hours. And then I said, can you text me? Not you, Wondry. It's like, can. Can you just text me and let me know?

[Dax Shepard]

And.

[Monica Padman]

And Alice shout out was like, even if you don't get it. And I was like, yes, yes, it's okay. I want to know.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Let me know.

[Monica Padman]

And then I thought, like, you know what's funny? I really was like, it doesn't matter. I don't like it. We're fine. I said to her, I was like, it's fine. We're fine. Like, we. We're. We're happy with this show.

[Dax Shepard]

Being in the first 25 was already blew My kind of mind.

[Monica Padman]

Exactly. That already felt like such a validating moment. Yes. So then, but so like, you know, I was like, oh, it's tomorrow. Okay. And I was talking to my parents and I was like, oh, you know, we might be, I don't know, we're in the top 25 for a golden Globe. We find out tomorrow. And they were like, what? And, and then. So I got a little bit antsy when they did that and I went to, to bed and I was like, yeah, I'll just wake up at eight, like normal and see. And then my body woke up at like 4:30 and was just like ready. And I was like, oh no. Oh no. I guess I, I care more than.

[Dax Shepard]

I, than I think I relate so much because. And I'm not lying. There's no like ego protection in my waking hours. I'm fine either way. It doesn't make us break us. It's. It would be a lovely icing on the cake, but it's not thing. Yeah, my subconscious feels differently, I guess because for three nights leading up to that Sunday morning, I was having all these weird anxiety dreams. And so somehow that's in my subconscious. Like that's not in my waking.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Existence.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So it was 4:30 and I was like, oh no. But I'm not gonna look. I, I'm gonna try to go back to sleep, but I'm not gonna look. And I obviously did not sleep for that. And I just. And I, at one point I was like, I'm gonna look. And then we had a nice text. And then, yeah, I texted you and.

[Dax Shepard]

I said, so what was your like, visceral body reaction?

[Monica Padman]

I was very grateful for everything. It was just like, oh my God, how cool to be recognized in the first of, of this category. It's like, that's so special. Look what we made. It was more that like, look what we did. Done. I could really like tap into that. Like, oh my God, we, we've done something very cool and I'm proud of it and I'm proud of all of us. So that was the feeling. And then I texted you and I said, let me know when you wake up. We have a video to make. And then we made one.

[Dax Shepard]

We made one. And I'm just not. I got a. I should have called Rob first. I know how to record my screens. It was easy. Record my screen. FaceTime. You. We have a fun channel. Chit chat. This is great. Send it to you. You text me back like, hey, where's the audio?

[Monica Padman]

No audio.

[Robbie]

Look at that voice memo too.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, you gotta do them both at the same time.

[Robbie]

I think that'd be the move.

[Monica Padman]

That didn't work out.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, that didn't work out.

[Monica Padman]

Ironically.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. That's okay though.

[Monica Padman]

And that's okay. But it was. It was a fun day.

[Dax Shepard]

Super fun day. Super duper fun day.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm gonna credit you for bringing your state championship winner spirit.

[Monica Padman]

Thank you.

[Dax Shepard]

I think we're riding on your.

[Robbie]

Yeah, I had lunch. Lost my softball championship the day before.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, you had.

[Robbie]

So it was not for me.

[Monica Padman]

You were honest.

[Dax Shepard]

You were worried.

[Monica Padman]

You're like, well, no.

[Robbie]

Well, I forgot it was even happening.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Did it dig you out of your hole?

[Robbie]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Did you care more about this or the softball?

[Dax Shepard]

Be honest.

[Robbie]

I cared more about this. I was saying gratitude. Although I, I woke up at like 5:30 to the text messages.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Robbie]

And I said, I told Natalie and she just grunted and put her blanket.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah. That's appropriate.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, I also. So yeah, I, I saw that and I saw the text. I was so excited. And I FaceTime you. And then I'm like, okay, well, a, it's time for me to take the kids to school. And then also I'm going to probably tell them.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And then I was like on my way to do that. I was like, oh, I better check and see if Kristen was next. I don't want to walk down there like, hey, check me out. And then I don't say congratulations. And then so I was kind of nervously scrolling through. I was like, okay, good. We're good.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

So then it was.

[Monica Padman]

It was one. And her show has one as well. Very exciting. It'll be a real family affair at that event.

[Dax Shepard]

Big time family affair.

[Monica Padman]

I'm proud of both of you and I'm glad to be doing this with the both of you.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, man. I would never. I would never in my life have gotten nominated for Golden Globe without you two. It's just that simple. It's black and white.

[Monica Padman]

I know. We all came here. We did. Me and you came here. I used to watch that show in dreams. Dream, dream my little heart out walking that red carpet, being there. And I'm doing it.

[Dax Shepard]

Are you gonna wear your leggings?

[Monica Padman]

Back door, back, back door. No, look, I'm the fashion. I'm stressed.

[Dax Shepard]

God, stressed. I thought you would be the most excited you've ever. You're like, you're dying for a gal. Well, this is the gala of all. I know.

[Monica Padman]

But I, I have to. I wanna get it perfect. I want to get it perfect. And I want a dress that you.

[Dax Shepard]

Want to win best dressed.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. And like, the dress is.

[Dax Shepard]

You want to sweep the Golden Globes. Best dress.

[Monica Padman]

I want them all. I want all. No, it's political. You know, the fashion world's very political. Who will style who. And the dresses, like most of them are probably already gone to, you know, big people. And I want to. I want to look good. And I am stressed, but I'm excited.

[Dax Shepard]

I'm not stressed. I'm pretty confident. You're gonna look great.

[Monica Padman]

Thank you.

[Dax Shepard]

So big. Thanks to everyone.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And Mary, Mary, Mary, Mary, Mary, Mary, Mary, Mary.

[Monica Padman]

And happy New Year. We'll see you guys next year.

[Robbie]

Let's do some facts.

[Dax Shepard]

Let's do.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Nice.

[Monica Padman]

Fantastic. Okay, now, what is the name of the lady whose legs got burned by the hot coffee?

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, good.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. We should shout her out.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, I don't. It. I don't think. She's probably still wet.

[Monica Padman]

I don't either.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, that was in the 80s.

[Monica Padman]

It was 92.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, it was 92.

[Monica Padman]

Yes. She suffered third degree burns. Her name is hopefully Stella Liebeck.

[Dax Shepard]

She's so likable. If you watch the documentary.

[Monica Padman]

She was 79.

[Dax Shepard]

That's my point. She was 8. You know, she's 80. Then. That was 30.

[Robbie]

She died 11 years ago.

[Dax Shepard]

She died 11.

[Monica Padman]

Maybe some complications.

[Robbie]

No broken heart, I think.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Jesus Christ, you guys.

[Dax Shepard]

Happy holidays. She was so sweet. And she didn't want any money. She just wanted her legs fixed.

[Monica Padman]

God. Yeah. She was 79 and her grandson's car passenger. This story is so sad.

[Dax Shepard]

I know. And also, it was kind of pitched to us as it was, like, reckless. Yeah. But she had. They pulled over into a parking spot and she picked the thing up, and.

[Monica Padman]

Then, you know, the lid fell off.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yeah, yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And it splashed all over thighs. And just.

[Monica Padman]

Can you imagine if you were with your grandma and your grandma's legs walked.

[Dax Shepard]

In there and pulled the person operating the car. I would. Walked in there and jerked it off the wall. I wouldn't have hurt a person, but I would have flipped. If my grandma Yolis had been hurt, I would have ripped that whole machine out.

[Monica Padman]

I know.

[Dax Shepard]

Like, what the is wrong with you guys? Look at my grandma Yolis's thighs. She was named after Ulyses S. Grant. She important woman.

[Monica Padman]

Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

That's true. Do you know that? That's so weird.

[Monica Padman]

I didn't know that. Yeah, that's really, really cute.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. But poor Stella was hospitalized for eight days.

[Robbie]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

It's as serious of a burn as I've ever seen.

[Monica Padman]

And. And, oh.

[Dax Shepard]

It'S like when Cooper and Fallon are trying to talk about the Elephant man and they just can't.

[Monica Padman]

I know. Because it's so sad.

[Dax Shepard]

My man's. They said at one point, one of them said my man's bones were whatever.

[Monica Padman]

I know. Because. Severe burns to her thighs.

[Robbie]

Oh, no.

[Dax Shepard]

Did you say genitals? Is that what you're laughing at? Okay. You saw genitals and you thought of an older lady's genital and now you have the giggles.

[Monica Padman]

It's just no one talks about that part, obviously. That's horrible.

[Dax Shepard]

It's part of ageism. We think that. I know an older woman doesn't have a vagina anymore. She just becomes a Barbie.

[Monica Padman]

But she kind of didn't have a vagina anymore.

[Dax Shepard]

She can't have kids, so why does she need it?

[Monica Padman]

Oh, God. Okay. But yes, she. She sued for $20,000.

[Dax Shepard]

There you go.

[Monica Padman]

But then was awarded 2.7 million. Although this was later reduced.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Why?

[Monica Padman]

Because of society blaming women.

[Dax Shepard]

This doc is so great. I don't know where you find it. Hot coffee. But it's all about tort reform and what was sold to us. And really what happened in the states where they adopted it. Medical costs still went up, even outpacing some of the. The states that didn't do tort reform. It's all hoax anyways.

[Robbie]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

Also, I'm just gonna add. I'm on my soapbox. There are egregious cases. There's totally frivolous lawsuits. There' no question. Yes. But you have to just tolerate that that's going to happen so that you preserve the right for an individual citizen to take on the biggest companies in the world. You can sue Google.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

That is your only defense. Like, we have this one thing left, the civil court system. And that's the only way an individual can fight back with government corporations. So it has to be preserved and protected. And some of these. These damages have to be exact. Exorbitant.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

To get them to do a policy change because they just do a cost analysis and they go, it'd be cheaper for us to keep the policy and pay this person off.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

It's got to hurt them.

[Monica Padman]

Exactly. Because that's normal.

[Dax Shepard]

McDonald's and I love McDonald's.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Yes.

[Monica Padman]

We love McDonald's.

[Dax Shepard]

Change their policy in the. As a result of that case.

[Monica Padman]

Okay. Are cats smart? Well, I did our cats. Smarter than dogs.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

It is difficult to definitively say if cats or dogs are smarter as intelligence can be measured in. In different ways. And they show different strengths. Dogs have more neurons in their cerebral cortex, suggesting a higher capacity for tasks and learning. While cats may be more persistent in solving problems independently, ultimately, both are intelligent in their own right. AI is being very diplomatic.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, they're being robbed.

[Monica Padman]

Dogs are often considered more intelligent due to a high, higher number of neurons.

[Dax Shepard]

But as I learned in biology in college, it's more than that. It's the ratio to your mass.

[Monica Padman]

Right. Yeah. So why.

[Dax Shepard]

Because, like, a capuchin monkey doesn't have a bigger neocortex than, say, I don't know, Reese's Macaque. Maybe it does, but it's so tiny.

[Monica Padman]

Right? Exactly.

[Dax Shepard]

And it's super intelligent somehow. Because of that relationship.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, because wasn't that also like the Neanderthal?

[Dax Shepard]

Neanderthal has a bigger brain.

[Monica Padman]

Right.

[Dax Shepard]

1650 cc's versus 1450.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Right.

[Dax Shepard]

But they were bigger neocortex. They were having heavier.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

And I don't know if their neocortex was bigger.

[Monica Padman]

Okay, well, this says. This says. Studies suggest that people with higher IQs often gravitate toward feline companions.

[Dax Shepard]

I believe that says.

[Monica Padman]

But why? Reason number one. Independent minds attract independent pets. Cats don't need constant attention. They do their own thing. Perfect for thinkers, creatives, and deep workers who value quiet focus. That's interesting.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, now, dogs present as dumber.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah. And their tongues are out. And they're slobbering.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, my God.

[Monica Padman]

The dicks are out often.

[Dax Shepard]

And they're hard sometimes.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah.

[Dax Shepard]

I've never seen a cat's. I've never seen a cat erection.

[Monica Padman]

Me either.

[Dax Shepard]

I don't even know if they have erections.

[Monica Padman]

No, no, either. I looked up how many doodle dogs there are in Los Angeles. There's no exact number, but it's a large and growing population. It has an estimated. Los Angeles county has an estimated 5.3 million dogs across roughly 3.3 million households. And doodle dogs are a popular category, though not the most popular breed overall.

[Dax Shepard]

What is?

[Monica Padman]

You think they'd say?

[Dax Shepard]

Who cares?

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, I sure don't.

[Dax Shepard]

Much.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, I mean rescues for sure. Rescue. Who knows what they are.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah.

[Robbie]

French bulldog.

[Monica Padman]

Really?

[Robbie]

It's the most popular dog breed in la, based on American Kennel Club registration data.

[Dax Shepard]

That's interesting. I don't see a lot of them either. They must be house dogs.

[Monica Padman]

There's a top hundred list.

[Dax Shepard]

Of dogs.

[Monica Padman]

No. Best Christmas movies of all time.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay, let's do the top ten.

[Monica Padman]

All right, I'll give it to you for Christmas. Ten is Gremlins.

[Dax Shepard]

Oh, great.

[Monica Padman]

Nine is Miracle on 34th Street.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

Eight is A Christmas Christmas Story.

[Robbie]

Great.

[Monica Padman]

Seven. National Lampoons Christmas Vacation.

[Dax Shepard]

It's number one. But continue.

[Monica Padman]

Six. Elf Ding Ding Ding.

[Dax Shepard]

Wow. They beat Vacation.

[Monica Padman]

Five. Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer for A Christmas Carol. Three. Die Hard. Two. Home Alone. That's my number one. And one. It's a wonderful Life.

[Dax Shepard]

That's a fine list. I am usually more.

[Monica Padman]

It's from IMDb.

[Dax Shepard]

Okay.

[Monica Padman]

Trusted brand.

[Dax Shepard]

I don't think Rudolph should be that high up. I'm going to say that it's 20 minutes and it's Claymation. I love it, but you can't put that up against the Grinch who Stole Christmas is way better. In fact, it's. I'm actually. Now I'm offended.

[Monica Padman]

Oh, boy.

[Dax Shepard]

The original Grinch who Stole Christmas should be number one. That is a perfect.

[Monica Padman]

I think it should be up there. I don't. Home Alone's my number one.

[Dax Shepard]

You can. I'm not going to fight you on that. It's great. We already watch it this season.

[Monica Padman]

So good. Okay, now click. At the end of this episode, the musicians we're talking about, click. We didn't know what they were talking about.

[Dax Shepard]

I did, but continue.

[Monica Padman]

We did not know what they were.

[Dax Shepard]

I had no idea what was the.

[Monica Padman]

Mean and I looked it up. In music, click most commonly refers to as a click track, an audio metronome used to keep musicians in sync during recording or live performance. It's a rhythmic pulse often played through headphones that ensures a consistent tempo and can include cues for song sections like verses and choruses.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, would hate that. It would be so distracting to me. I can see why some people don't like it.

[Monica Padman]

They don't like click.

[Dax Shepard]

If you just hear in your ear every time, click. Click.

[Monica Padman]

Yeah, I don't like that either. I don't like click.

[Dax Shepard]

Although you might be able to sing along perfectly given what we learned in the last fact check.

[Monica Padman]

Okay, that's it. Okay.

[Dax Shepard]

Well, I love Zoe.

[Monica Padman]

Yes.

[Dax Shepard]

No, I love Christma Time.

[Monica Padman]

Me too.

[Dax Shepard]

Yeah, it's so good.

[Monica Padman]

Happy holiday.

[Dax Shepard]

Happy holiday from us and ours. To you and yours. Goodbye, everyone. In between. Love you.

[Zooey Deschanel]

Love you.

[Dax Shepard]

Follow Armchair Expert on the Wondry app, Amazon Music, or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to every episode of Armchair Expert early and ad free right now by joining Wondry plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts. Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short [e-mail] survey.

[Gar]

Hey, basketball fans.

[Dax Shepard]

Steve Nash here.

[Gar]

Ready to elevate your basketball IQ?

[Dax Shepard]

I'm teaming up with LeBron James to bring you the latest season of Mind the Game and we're about to take you deeper into basketball than you've ever gone before. We're breaking down the real game, the X's and O's that actually matter. In every episode, we'll share elite level.

[Gar]

Strategy, dive into career defining moments, and.

[Dax Shepard]

Explain the why behind plays that changed a game, a team, or a championship.

[Gar]

LeBron and I have lived this game at the highest level for decades.

[Dax Shepard]

We've been in those pressure moments and made those game changing decisions and learned.

[Gar]

From the greatest basketball minds in history. Now we're pulling back the curtain and.

[Dax Shepard]

Sharing that knowledge with you.

[Gar]

Time to go beyond the highlights and.

[Dax Shepard]

Get into the real heart of basketball.

[Gar]

Watch Mind the game now on YouTube.

[Dax Shepard]

Prime video or Listen wherever you get your podcasts.