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Ask Pastor John
Don’t Let Her Die Before You Say This
00:09:33
How can we show Christ’s love to a dying, unbelieving loved one? Pastor John shares ten ways believers can embody God’s love.
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- [00:05]
A
Imagine you are a brand new believer new to the faith, and your mother is an unbeliever, a woman who has fought cancer four times, but now she's running out of time and it looks like she is losing her final battle. What do you say to her when the clock is ticking, the stakes are eternal and you are new to the faith. Today on Ask Pastor John don't let her die before you say this. Pastor John hello, my name is Ethan in Newcastle, England. My mother, who has battled cancer four times since she was 18, is now facing what appears to be her final fight at the age of 51. As a believer of only two years, I am heartbroken knowing she could pass away without the peace found in Christ. I've shared the gospel with her and will continue to do so, trusting in God's sovereignty while staying by her side to comfort her. How can I, as a young Christian, navigate this difficult situation in a way that honors God and reflects his love to my mother?
- [01:13]
B
Ethan, I don't know if we have recorded this in time. It may be that your mother is already gone. If so, I'm sorry we didn't make it in time. But I do hope that what I say here will be of some help to you and to others, perhaps, since that will not be the last time that you say goodbye to somebody you love. As I thought about how I might be of help, it seemed to me that the best thing I could do is to make the connection between your love for your mother and the love of Christ for you. It seems to me that you already have the right instincts for how to love her because you say you're going to stay by her and comfort her and that you've tried to share the gospel with her. And I would add simply that you keep on doing what you're already doing and that you see it as an expression of Christ's love for you and through you, to your mother. So here are the specifics of what I mean by this connection between you loving your mom and Jesus loving you. I'm going to suggest 10 things that you can say to your mother and that you can embody for your mother, which show the love that you have for her and the love Christ has for you in the same way. This is remarkable how Christ has loved us in all the ways that we can extend to dying loved ones. The Bible says in 1 John 4:19 we love because God first loved us. And what that means right now for you is that every expression of your love for your mother is a picture or an embodiment of God's love for you and through you to her. So I'm going to give you 10 things that you can say to your mother with the Bible verses that show that God has loved you like that. Number one, say to her, I love you, Mom. I love you so much. Because God says to you, ethan, in Ephesians 2, 4, 5, being rich in mercy because of the great love with which I loved you, Ethan, even when you were dead in your trespasses, I made you alive together with Christ. Number two, say to her, if I could, mom, I would take your place, I really would. Because Christ said to you, Ethan, in Isaiah 53, 4, surely I have borne your griefs, I have carried your sorrows. I was pierced for your transgressions, I was crushed for your iniquities. 3. Say to her, I am so sorry that you are going through this. Every sympathetic bone in my body goes out to you, Mom, Because Christ said to you, Ethan, in Hebrews 4:15, you do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with your weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tested like you are, yet without sin. Number four, say to her, I will stand by you, Mom. I won't leave you. I'll be here. Because Jesus said to you, Ethan, in Hebrews 13, 5, I'll never leave you. I'll never forsake you. I am your helper. Don't be afraid. No man can harm you. Number five, say to her, you are very precious to me, Mom. Very precious. Because the Lord has said to you, Ethan, in Psalm 116, 15, precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of his saints. And in Deuteronomy 32, 10, you are the apple of my eye, Ethan. 6 say to her, I want the very best for you, Mom. Because God said to you, Ethan, in Romans 8, 28 and 32, because you love me, I am working all things together for your good, because you're called according to my purpose. I did not spare my own son, but gave him up for you, Ethan, and I will not fail to give you everything with him. And he also said, ethan, I make the sun to rise on the evil and the good. Matthew 5:7. Say to her, how can I serve you, mom? Can I get you something? Because Jesus has served you, Ethan, and given you an example in John 13:5, he poured water in a basin, began to wash the disciples feet, and to wipe them with the towel that was wrapped around him. Eight, say to her, you have been so faithful to me, Mom, So faithful. Thank you. Because, Ethan, even though you never gave Jesus anything that he hadn't first given you, nevertheless you served him faithfully. And he will say on the last day, well done, good and faithful servant. So say to her, well done, Mom. Well done. 9. Say to her, I'm going to miss you, Mom. I'm really going to miss you. Because God said to you, Ethan, in Hosea 11. 8. How can I give you up, O Ethan? How can I hand you over, O dear one? How can I make you like an enemy? My heart recoils within me. My compassion grows warm and tender. God has spoken like that to you, Ethan, even though you were once his enemy. So speak tenderly to her like that. Finally, number 10 say to her, mom, I won't let you down. I will make you glad. I promise to live in a way you could admire. Because Jesus has said to you, ethan, I won't let you down, Ethan, I'll always be the kind of savior you can admire. I will be for you unsearchable riches. So, Ethan, you may or may not God will give you wisdom in this. Tell your mother that the ways you are loving her are stronger and more heartfelt because you have not only seen love in her, but you've seen it in Jesus. He has loved you these ways, given you the ability to love her in these ways. And then pray for her. And we will pray with you that she see the connection between being loved by her son and being loved by Christ. And we pray, believe.
- [08:12]
A
Amen. That is our prayer, that she would come to faith through your words, Ethan. It is truly remarkable how Christ has loved us in all the ways that we can extend to dying loved ones. Every time you tell a dying person you love them or you wash their feet, or you promise not to leave their side, you are echoing the love of Jesus to them. And when you tell someone you'd take their place if you could, you echo what happened in the substitution of Christ on the cross for us. That is so moving. Thank you, Pastor John, for those vivid illustrations from life about what we can communicate to others through our actions and our attitudes and our words. And for more on end of life topics. And there are many of them to think through. See the Ask Pastor John book in that final section of the book on suicide, euthanasia and the will To Live, pages 441 to 449. We've covered a lot and I've summarized that for you in that final section in the book, staying on this theme of passing away 10 seconds after you die, where will you be? That's next time. I'm Tony Reinke. We'll see you back here on Thursday.