Coffee In the Pool w/ the Island Girls

Summary

Bad Friends – "Coffee in the Pool w/ the Island Girls"

Episode Date: June 29, 2026
Hosts: Bobby Lee & Andrew Santino
Guests: Rudy, Anisa ("the Island Girls")

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Episode Overview

In this vibrant and often chaotic episode of Bad Friends, Bobby Lee and Andrew Santino welcome Rudy and Anisa back to the show for a spirited hangout. The conversation jumps from odd proverbs and banter, to family dynamics, failed show plans, Filipino culture, “ism” games, Bobby’s book signing, and a notorious coffee-in-the-pool incident. The group’s signature blend of irreverent humor and playful arguments underpins deep reflections on friendship, cultural quirks, and what it means to be part of the Bad Friends family.

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Key Discussion Points & Notable Segments

1. Opening Banter: Names Ruined Forever

Timestamps: 00:10–02:25

• The crew jokes about terrible bumper stickers and the decline of baby names like “Karen” and “Adolph.”
• Hilarious attempts to outdo each other with names that no one would ever give their kids.
  • Quote:
    “If you get near me, I drive slower.” — Bobby Lee mocking a bumper sticker (00:37)
    “I want a bumper sticker in my front window says, well, then I’ll crash into you.” — Bobby Lee (00:43)

2. Movie Debates & Karaoke Bars

Timestamps: 02:26–06:00

• Andrew reviews the movie “Obsession,” sparking a debate over its merits (or lack thereof).
  • Andrew was underwhelmed by the film’s twist:
    “There wasn’t enough where I was like, whoa, I didn’t—Oh, wow.” (05:10)
• Memories of karaoke nights at Koreatown’s Brass Monkey, dinner pizza, and ever-elusive “hostess girls” at karaoke spots.

3. Bobby’s Book Signing & Ism Game

Timestamps: 06:41–14:57

• Bobby talks about random videos popping up in his feed, feelings of awkwardness when his own comedy appears, and his recent book signing (for a graphic novel).
  • Quote:
    “Most people that book signings, they wrote a book.” — Andrew Santino (07:36)
    “It’s called literature. It’s animated.” — Bobby Lee (07:58)
• Introduction of the "ism" fines—every time Bobby says his signature repetitive phrases ("yeah, yeah, yeah,” “no, no, no,” etc.), he owes $5 to McCone.
  • The crew brainstorms Bobby’s verbal tics:
    “The thing is, is that...”,
    “Can I say something...”,
    “No, no...”,
    “Yeah, yeah, yeah…”
  • Memorable moment: The running tally of Bobby's fines becomes a recurring bit and punchline throughout the show. (09:39–13:45)

4. Tattoos & Bookstore Laughter

Timestamps: 14:16–15:55

• Bobby discusses covering up and retouching his old tattoos and gets roasted about his “Gooner” (Arsenal fan) allegiance.
  • The Elmo-style laugh costs Bobby more ism points.

5. The Island Girls Return & Awkward Parties

Timestamps: 15:16–18:32

• Rudy’s delayed birthday greeting (“Belated happy birthday”) leads to stories about stilted parties and McCone’s awkward, silent birthday gathering.
• Andrew’s party intervention:
  “They’re sitting in a circle. No one’s talking. I'm going to leave. This is not a party. It’s midsommar.” — Andrew (15:58–16:06)

6. Comedy Store Drama: Friends Who Don’t Show Up

Timestamps: 18:33–22:33

• Bobby tells an epic story about rearranging his Comedy Store schedule for friends who promised to come—and then ghosted him, leaving reserved (and expensive) seats empty.
  • “So I show up at the Comedy Store... No one's in there.” — Bobby (21:09)
  • Andrew empathizes: “That’s insane. They could have sold those seats.” (21:23)
• The aftermath: a barrage of texts, a guilt-driven visit, and Lucky Boy breakfast burritos offered as an apology the next day.

7. Family, Babysitting, and Life in the House

Timestamps: 22:40–45:47

• Discussion about family hierarchies: Rudy and her mother leaving, leaving Bobby desperate for housekeeping help.
  • “Your mother is my housekeeper, essentially ... She's going to be gone for three months now. What are you going to do?” — Andrew (40:14)
• Bobby accuses Rudy of surface cleaning, leading to jokes about pyramid stacks of laundry and outsourcing chores to cleaning apps and 90-year-old ladies.

8. Uno King and House Dynamics

Timestamps: 35:07–36:54

• Bobby boasts about becoming the “Uno King,” winning six games, and using bribes and intimidation tactics.
  • “We colonize.” — Bobby (35:31)
  • Rudy and Anisa are dubbed “goop farmers”—quickly corrected to “gong farmers” (medieval poop collectors)—a misunderstanding leading to much laughter.
  • “A knight ... responsible for manually removing human waste from city cesspits.” — Andrew reading from Wikipedia (36:01)

9. Filipino Culture Deep Dive: Gangs, Indigenous People & Camp Food

Timestamps: 55:14–62:19

• Rudy educates the group about indigenous Filipino groups (“Negritos”) and regional gangs like “Bahala na Gang,” “Sputnik,” and “True Brown Style (TBS).”
• Hilarious talk of fake gang initiations—eating dead frogs and (optional) spankings.
• Bobby shares his Philippines charity stories:
  • Feeding spaghetti to rural villagers (“I bought a bunch of spaghetti ... and I fed the villagers boxes of spaghetti” — Bobby [62:15])

10. Leaving America & Culture Shock

Timestamps: 46:55–70:07

• The “Island Girls” discuss returning to the Philippines, raising questions about longing for home, and what they’ll miss about the U.S.
• Mundane habits: going to coffee shops, eating three-week-old fridge meat (“Why waste?” — Rudy [48:42]), having little interest in American outings or food.
• Discussion of camping fails: uncomfortable nights, scary neighbors yelling at wives at 4am, and ham-and-cheese sandwiches constructed in total darkness.
• Bobby’s childhood memories of being abandoned at camp by his father and uncle, leading to a group consensus: “Never camp again.”

11. Emotional Farewells

Timestamps: 70:03–71:28

• The group acknowledges this is likely Rudy and Anisa’s last episode for some time.
  • “We’ll miss you… Go have fun back at home. You’ll be back.” — Andrew (70:06–70:09)
  • “You’ll miss to be in the Philippines.” — Rudy (70:52)
  • “We hope you come back.” — Bobby (71:05)

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Notable Quotes & Classic Jokes

• Bobby Lee on his book signing:
  “It's called literature. It's animated.” (07:58)

• On coffee in the pool:
  “All the coffee things in the pool… My pool guy was worried. He was like, ‘Why is your pool black?’” — Bobby (32:49–33:10)

• On “ism” fines:
  “Every time I say an ism, now, I'm going to give McCone $5.” — Bobby (09:05)

• Bobby, on work and family delegation:
  “Your mother is my housekeeper, essentially. She's gonna be gone for three months now. What are you going to do?” — Andrew (40:14)

• Rudy, on Filipino stomachs:
  “No, we're not having diarrhea, so it's good.” (48:52)

• Bobby, reflecting on Filipino charity:
  “I bought a bunch of spaghetti ... and I fed the villagers boxes of spaghetti.” (62:15)

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Running Gags & Callbacks

• Continual “ism” tally—Bobby’s catchphrases cost him cumulatively over the episode.
• Elmo-style cackles and repetition fines for Bobby.
• The “coffee in the pool” prank, leading to permanent pool stains and a baffled pool guy.
• “Gong farmers” and feigned outrage around misunderstood terminology.
• Ongoing roast of group cleaning dynamics—pyramid laundry and poor folding skills.

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Episode Flow & Tonal Highlights

• Language & Tone: Signature Bad Friends: irreverent, high-energy, teasing, and occasionally dark (“Death.” — Rudy [71:28]).
• Energy: The show swings between playful conflict, cultural exploration, and genuine insider warmth—a blend that’s as welcoming as it is unpredictable.
• Sentiment: Underneath the barbs and chaos, the episode is full of affection and hints at bittersweet departures, especially as Rudy and Anisa prepare to head home.

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Useful Timestamps

• 00:10–02:25: Name jokes & ruined baby names.
• 06:41–14:57: Book signing and “ism” challenge.
• 18:33–22:33: Comedy Store “no-show” friend saga.
• 32:49–34:29: Coffee-in-the-pool story and distressing shirts.
• 35:07–36:54: Uno King and gong farmer bit.
• 55:14–62:19: Filipino gangs, indigenous people, and Bobby’s charity.
• 64:43–68:55: Camping horror stories.
• 70:03–71:28: Closing sentiments and goodbyes.

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Final Thoughts

This episode is a quintessential Bad Friends experience: raucous, random, and surprisingly heartfelt beneath the signature sarcasm. Whether discussing Filipino gang initiation, strange cleaning habits, or why no one should ever go camping, Bobby, Andrew, and the Island Girls make even the most mundane stories a hilariously memorable ride.

For fans of inside jokes and cultural deep dives, this episode is a must-listen—just don’t expect the “ism” fines to ever end, or the pool to return to its original color.

Transcript

[Rudy]

You two are bad friends.

[Bobby Lee]

Who are these two idiots? White dude and an Asian dude. You two are disgusting. You two are something.

[Rudy]

We're bad friends.

[Andrew Santino]

What's going on with you today? You feel like you're. Yeah. You're very Miyagi today.

[Bobby Lee]

It's a Sunday.

[Andrew Santino]

Teach us Miyagi.

[Bobby Lee]

I woke up and it's like. You know when you have one foot in the past and one foot in the future, you're pissing on today and living in the moment.

[Andrew Santino]

We gonna do a bunch of Chinese proverbs.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm not doing Chinese proverbs. I'm just that I had. I saw a bumper sticker driving over here. Made me kind of mad.

[Andrew Santino]

What it say?

[Bobby Lee]

It said, if you drive. If you get near me, I drive slower.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh.

[Bobby Lee]

So I want a bumper sticker in my front window says, well, then I'll crash into you.

[Andrew Santino]

You just have to drive in front of them after you see it.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I. I went to the side just to see what they look like.

[Andrew Santino]

What did they look like?

[Bobby Lee]

It's an old white lady.

[Rudy]

Ew.

[Bobby Lee]

Ooh. Karen. Pass. Stay hydrated.

[Andrew Santino]

Look up how many babies born in 2026 named Karen? Like, nine, probably. Yeah, I think that ruined the name Karen.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, Adolph is ruined.

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, that one's back.

[Bobby Lee]

It's a kid off his back. Oh.

[Andrew Santino]

What does it say? How many babies named Karen plummeted. The name plummeted.

[Bobby Lee]

It plummeted.

[Andrew Santino]

It fell out of the top eight. Pull.

[Bobby Lee]

Pot.

[Andrew Santino]

Pull. Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. See if pole. Pot.

[Andrew Santino]

Potsy.

[Bobby Lee]

See a pole. Potential. A kid.

[Rudy]

Zero.

[Bobby Lee]

Zero. Zero. I created a name. Zero.

[Andrew Santino]

Why?

[Bobby Lee]

Why? Because he was a bad guy. Give me a name Trump. You can't beat. You can't beat zero, dude.

[Andrew Santino]

Yes, I can.

[Bobby Lee]

That's a. I mean, I'm that. I'm champ right now. How many babies I'm name champ right now, dude.

[Andrew Santino]

How many babies in 2026?

[Bobby Lee]

You can't make up a name that no one's ever had. Like

[Andrew Santino]

Hitler.

[Bobby Lee]

No, no. Just say a name. In the past, how Many people in

[Andrew Santino]

2026 were named Genghis Khan?

[Bobby Lee]

Genghis.

[Andrew Santino]

No, you said Pol Pot.

[Bobby Lee]

Genghis does not appear in the top thousand recorded by baby. Yeah, but it's still not zero.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, but pole would be a name. That would be a baby. But you said pole.

[Rudy]

Pot.

[Bobby Lee]

You said Genghis Khan.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, Genghis Khan.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

All right. I'm saying.

[Bobby Lee]

All right.

[Andrew Santino]

Zero babies named Genghis in 2024.

[Bobby Lee]

If I ever. Baby. That's what it is.

[Andrew Santino]

We're Tied Genghis Pot.

[Bobby Lee]

All right. All right. And that's it. All right. We were tied. We're tied. We'd have to play. Well, there's no way to go lower.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. There's no way to go lower. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. So I saw Obsession last night.

[Bobby Lee]

Did I not tell you it was good? Did you think it was good?

[Andrew Santino]

What did I. I called.

[Bobby Lee]

Why you tell me?

[Andrew Santino]

I called. I called McCone. I went and got pizza. I called McCone.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

What did I say?

[Bobby Lee]

Terrible movie. What did you like about this movie? What was good about it?

[Andrew Santino]

And then he goes, ever the contrarian.

[Bobby Lee]

I did. You said that. Ever the contrary douchebag.

[Andrew Santino]

And I go, what are you doing? He's like, hold on. Sorry, man. I'm at karaok. To go back in. They just picked my song.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Did you go to the place on Wilshire? What was it called? The Monkey Bar. What's it called? I don't know, but it had a bunch of Egyptian stuff in it. But it was.

[Andrew Santino]

It's called Brass Monkey.

[Bobby Lee]

Brass Monkey. Oh, yeah, yeah. Well, I was close. There's monkey in it.

[Andrew Santino]

I mean, Beastie Boys, dude.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. Brass Monkey. There's one on Wil.

[Andrew Santino]

Funy Monkey.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. And it's a huge.

[Andrew Santino]

It's a massive carry. We've been.

[Bobby Lee]

We've been there. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You didn't go to that one with how many private rooms? Was it like a row of rooms?

[Bobby Lee]

It was a lot of private rooms. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Maybe that was it.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, it's in Koreatown. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've been to that one. It was fun downstairs. And then they have the. The girls that you can bring in. Why? Why not, dudes? That's the question you have to ask yourself. Why not?

[Andrew Santino]

Why not?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah. Why are you asking why? Always. You always say why not? You know what I mean? But why is it. What does that do with karaoke? I don't know. But Koreans, they just do the. Come on in, you know, she don't.

[Andrew Santino]

Anybody's allowed it.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, no, but you know how they. What they. What do they call them, Carlos?

[Andrew Santino]

They're like. They're like. They're like a. I was gonna hang at your table.

[Bobby Lee]

They're not geishas, dude. It's not Japan. No. Here in America.

[Andrew Santino]

No.

[Bobby Lee]

They have hostess girls. Hostess girls. That's all. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

How did we not get that?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Host. Yeah, they're hostess.

[Bobby Lee]

They're hostess girls.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. They're friends.

[Bobby Lee]

Come on in. Yeah. And then they. They try to sell you on a. You know, a really expensive Bottle of whatever. And they flirt with you. Right? You guys sing together.

[Andrew Santino]

You buy the bottle.

[Bobby Lee]

You buy the bottle and then they just disappear. I don't know. They're like ninjas. They're not engages, they're ninjas.

[Andrew Santino]

They're apparit.

[Bobby Lee]

Pay the bill. They're just gone. Gone. Why don't you love me? Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I did not. I unfortunately wasn't a big fan.

[Bobby Lee]

Did your wife like it? No, you weren't, you didn't like it. I, I, I thought it was a good pr.

[Andrew Santino]

I'll tell you this. A good premise. Very good premise. We were hanging. They, they hung the film on the premise. And there was no great twists for me. There wasn't enough where I was like, whoa, I didn't, oh, wow. And then my biggest point that I made on the phone to him was he breaks it and he says, I want Nikki, whatever her last name is, to love me more than any one or anything. One of the two things in the world that didn't justify the behavior to me. It should have been a clever phrase that would have been gray enough. Like, I wish Nikki Howard was crazy for me. I said that when I walked out,

[Bobby Lee]

I was like, your writer's hat on.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Wouldn't that have been better?

[Bobby Lee]

You got to take it off. When you go to a movie, leave without me.

[Andrew Santino]

Something big. Yeah. Something that was like, okay, Chaos.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

Also. Oh, you didn't, you didn't think she was going to feed him?

[Bobby Lee]

The cat?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, she packed him lunch. Saw that coming for fucking 50 miles.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. And also when your cat dies, you don't keep it near your house.

[Andrew Santino]

Bury it.

[Bobby Lee]

No, you, like when Remy died. When my dog died two, three months

[Andrew Santino]

ago, you enshrined him in a throne. He's in your living room.

[Bobby Lee]

I know, I understand. But you had, I had a mummified.

[Andrew Santino]

It's lock and key.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, you gotta, yeah, you take the meat out.

[Andrew Santino]

Gotta take the meat out.

[Bobby Lee]

You gotta put them in a funny position with a tuxedo and a hat is what I did. But my point, no, I didn't do that. We had somebody take them to a facility and he's, we, we got his ashes. Like, what the is he doing? Not keep, did he bury it in the backyard?

[Andrew Santino]

I don't think they showed anything like that. We are doing spoilers, but it's been out at this point for, you know, two months, so.

[Bobby Lee]

Right.

[Andrew Santino]

Anyway, no, I, I what? I enjoy.

[Bobby Lee]

You weren't scared at all?

[Andrew Santino]

No. Dude, I'm a 43 year old man. Wasn't scared.

[Rudy]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

The girl being like, you do that in the studio.

[Bobby Lee]

I know I do that. I know I do that. I know.

[Andrew Santino]

It's not that crazy.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. But I have ticks.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, here's another. I, I. And I'm gonna offer McCone some money. And this is what the deal is. If you want to hear my new thing. I've been just, for some reason, bad friends and other part, my podcasts have been popping up in my algorithm. I'm trying to stay, you know, with, you know, the things I want to watch, which is why Carlos like people in Africa doing things.

[Andrew Santino]

Football clips and people in India doing.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, I like, you know. You know, and. But for some reason, comedy is, like, coming up.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, good.

[Bobby Lee]

Like, when you see your friend doing stand up, you just. You go fast, right?

[Andrew Santino]

I shut my phone off. If I see someone I know in like a. What's going on? Who's this girl?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Right away.

[Bobby Lee]

Especially a crowd work kind of video, I go fast.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, I'm out.

[Bobby Lee]

But anyway, I real. Well, so I had a book signing yesterday. No, I know it's real, but it's

[Andrew Santino]

just such a funny phrase for you to say, because most people that book signings, they wrote a book.

[Bobby Lee]

He's never laughed that much ever. Okay, get it out. Get it all out, man.

[Andrew Santino]

What's the book? Oh, there was deadway. Cartoon.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. It's not a cartoon.

[Andrew Santino]

What is it?

[Bobby Lee]

It's called literature.

[Andrew Santino]

It's animated.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

So it's a graphic novel.

[Bobby Lee]

It's a graphic novel.

[Andrew Santino]

It's a cartoon. No, but it's awesome.

[Bobby Lee]

All right.

[Andrew Santino]

I actually read it, by the way.

[Bobby Lee]

I had a book.

[Andrew Santino]

I read it. It's in our front room. I read one.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. I only have one.

[Andrew Santino]

Huh?

[Bobby Lee]

I only have one.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, it took a series. Took about five minutes.

[Bobby Lee]

All right.

[Andrew Santino]

I think doctors.

[Bobby Lee]

I just say, I read it.

[Andrew Santino]

I read it.

[Bobby Lee]

Y. Yeah.

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

It's not Harry Potter. You know what I mean?

[Andrew Santino]

I really enjoyed it.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, no, you didn't. And I don't care.

[Andrew Santino]

Yes, I did.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't care what you think about now. You're getting me riled up. I try to be Zach.

[Andrew Santino]

Anyway, book signing.

[Bobby Lee]

And so, you know, one guy said, can you write this now? This is a war, Bobby Lee. And I go, why would you want me to write that? He goes, it's something that you.

[Andrew Santino]

Would you say, you say on the show all the time, right?

[Bobby Lee]

And then I go, what are some other things I say? You know, I mean, and then also I'm watching algorithms, and so there's certain isms that I have that drive me crazy. That I do. So every time I say an ism, now, I'm going to give McCone $5.

[Andrew Santino]

What's that give me?

[Bobby Lee]

I'll give you some of the things that I. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Is. Is that.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Is. Is that the thing? Is. Is that. Yeah, yeah. Can I say something? $5.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

[Andrew Santino]

As well. $5.

[Bobby Lee]

No, we're saying. No, no, we.

[Andrew Santino]

$5.

[Bobby Lee]

We're saying what they are now, and then they're going to be a time when the game begins. Thousands of dollars from now on. Yeah, yeah. There's no way I'm giving you 25 bucks right now. All right? So I'm just telling. Let's get the isms out now. And then if I say them, I give McCown, and we'll add it up through time, and then I'll give them money.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

All right, so let's write them out. So it's. I think two. Yes is fine. Three yeahs.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's three.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, it's gotta be three. Yeah. So if I say, yeah, that's fine. I can say two nos.

[Andrew Santino]

No, you get one.

[Bobby Lee]

No, I get. That's not fair.

[Andrew Santino]

Dude. This is your ism rule.

[Bobby Lee]

All right? This is my ism rule. All right, so are you writing it down?

[Andrew Santino]

But I want to see it on a. On the thing.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Can I say something?

[Andrew Santino]

Can I say which.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't even know that I say that.

[Andrew Santino]

Do I say that all the time?

[Bobby Lee]

Okay, the thing is, is that. Yeah, right. That's another thing that I say. Right. What are some other things I say? Go. Whoa, dude. Oh, I don't. I've never said, whoa, dude. Dude, give me the loot. I haven't said, give me the long diamond. Give me the loot. I haven't said that a long time. That kept. What, your. Urban, Bobby?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, yeah. Urban. Whole thing.

[Bobby Lee]

Like, whenever there's a black person around, some octaves change in your voice. No, no, we can't do that. Because I'm being. You know, I mean, I'm trying to get to the rhythm and their. Their energy, like, vibe. It's a vibe I'm vibing.

[Andrew Santino]

You do have to match that.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, you have to buy.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, that's gotta be. If he's in character, he can say anything.

[Bobby Lee]

How you doing, bro? You know, there's some people that you say that to, you know? Yeah. Skin.

[Rudy]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

No, I didn't. Say that.

[Andrew Santino]

I did.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, he did. Oh, you did?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, it is. What else?

[Bobby Lee]

You know. You mean That's a Ronnie chain game.

[Andrew Santino]

You know what? He says that. You know what? When he's about to get mad. You know what?

[Bobby Lee]

But. Oh, I see that.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

All right. That can't be a thing.

[Andrew Santino]

Why?

[Bobby Lee]

Because you say it.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. So that's not an ism.

[Andrew Santino]

I have no restrictions. I, I. No one came up to me about the isms.

[Bobby Lee]

Take. Take you know what out.

[Andrew Santino]

War. War. War.

[Bobby Lee]

Anything about war. Unless I'm talking about Iran.

[Andrew Santino]

Then we're good.

[Bobby Lee]

Then we're good. But if I, like, if I tell

[Andrew Santino]

somebody we're in a war repeating what Andrew just said.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. All the time, whatever he says, you say the word immediately after. Like, give me an example. Like, if he calls something like, ugly, you would say, yeah, yeah, that's ugly. But that's. That's. That's $10. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's ugly would be $10.

[Andrew Santino]

No, it's two years. He'll go, yeah, yeah, that's ugly.

[Rudy]

Double offense.

[Bobby Lee]

Yes. Well, then it's two. Yes, it's fine because it's three. Yes is the.

[Andrew Santino]

It is true. Yes is the rule.

[Bobby Lee]

Thank you. Are you out of your mind, dude?

[Andrew Santino]

He does say that.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't think that's an ism.

[Andrew Santino]

It's. I mean, it's like angrily.

[Bobby Lee]

Say it loud.

[Andrew Santino]

Are you mind it? Yeah. And then you fall away. You kick the table.

[Bobby Lee]

All right.

[Andrew Santino]

Kicking the table. Yeah, that's $5.

[Bobby Lee]

Kicking the table is $5. Okay. Laughing like Elmo. Okay, that's. You're. Now you're being a jerk. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You're being a jerk.

[Bobby Lee]

Breathing.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

You know the way you breathe. Yeah. You can't do that. Okay, wait, but that's enough, can I. No. Elmo laugh has got to get out now.

[Andrew Santino]

Get it out.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. Just put an X through it. All right. Put an X through it. Yeah. I have an elbow laugh sometimes. What? Just in case. Yeah, but I have an Elmo laugh. I never thought of it that way, but yeah. He brings up. I said yeah twice just now.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Oh, $5.

[Bobby Lee]

That's. No, that's not $5. Yeah. Three. Yes.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. And I caught myself.

[Andrew Santino]

Got close.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah,

[Andrew Santino]

that's it. That's one. Write it down.

[Bobby Lee]

There's no way I could do this. There's no way I could do it. All right, we'll try. Well, just for today, let's just try it today. Any is. Anyway. Fine.

[Andrew Santino]

Anyway is fine.

[Bobby Lee]

Anyway. It's fine.

[Andrew Santino]

Let me just finish what I was trying to say. I'm happy. A young filmmakers sprouting, and it's going to lead other young filmmakers to make stuff, and then we can start getting back to making shit. So maybe it helps.

[Bobby Lee]

I think it proves a point that we can make a movie for under. For the amount of money that they use now.

[Andrew Santino]

There's a weird thing that's happening with that. It's like everyone's like, $750,000. It's going to make over 200 million. And you're like, I know, but no one got paid. So someone makes a lot of money and everyone makes no money now. And then they'll go, but they'll get it on the next one. You're like, I know, but some of these people might not get the next one.

[Bobby Lee]

But that kid will.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, but not everybody will.

[Bobby Lee]

I know, but when Jordan did get out, they bought him a car. It's the same company, Blumhouse.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

On top of the money that he

[Andrew Santino]

got, I wouldn't want the car. I'd be like, I have a car. That's how I got to the shoot.

[Bobby Lee]

I understand, but give me the money. They did give him the money as well, but they also gave him a nice car.

[Andrew Santino]

I think they were probably gonna give this kid a bonus. And my guess was 10 mill. Yeah. And sign him to, like, an overall deal with them to make two more films.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, but a different movie.

[Andrew Santino]

Texas Taint on Massacre, I think.

[Rudy]

Right?

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, that's gonna be amazing.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, he's good. He's talented.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, he's a talented kid. You can just tell by. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Why did you cover up your comic store tattoo with a sticker or something?

[Bobby Lee]

Because I have a new one right here.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh.

[Andrew Santino]

We didn't even see this. The Arsenal tattoo. Did you see this big Gooner?

[Bobby Lee]

He Instagrammed it. Yeah, I Instagrammed it.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, that's great.

[Bobby Lee]

And then she retouched my repeated me. She retouched my Comedy Store, and she touched the mad part here.

[Andrew Santino]

Was it the same artist that did the original?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. You only one use one girl, Char, and she's great.

[Andrew Santino]

What are you doing with that star on your wrist?

[Bobby Lee]

I might get it removed.

[Andrew Santino]

Really?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. I'm getting this removed?

[Andrew Santino]

If you want to rejoin Fall Out Boy, you got to have

[Bobby Lee]

There's Elmo laugh. Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

There is 15 bucks.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. There's an elbow laugh.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm telling you, though, that.

[Bobby Lee]

Because that was so funny what you just said.

[Andrew Santino]

Let me see your.

[Bobby Lee]

You know that Was during the Fallout Boy era.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, that's why I said it. Let me see the gunr tattoo. Gunr for life, dude. Good for you. Congratulations.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, thank you. Oh, we've started. We've been here for.

[Andrew Santino]

We've been here for an hour and a half.

[Bobby Lee]

An hour and a half.

[Andrew Santino]

And you guys are late. No, you guys are late.

[Bobby Lee]

Sit down, sit down.

[Andrew Santino]

Guys.

[Bobby Lee]

Guys. How are you?

[Andrew Santino]

Ladies and gentlemen, it's Jules. Anisa.

[Bobby Lee]

Yes.

[Andrew Santino]

Back in the studio.

[Rudy]

Belated happy birthday.

[Andrew Santino]

I went to his party. You didn't go. Carlos went. Yes. You were invited. It's in your text. He showed it to me. He was really upset you didn't go. In fact, McCone When I showed up. Dude, this is so funny and pathetic. He's up. Look at. He's laughing. He knows. I walk in. I walk in with my wife and our friend, and we walk upstairs. They're sitting in a circle. Yeah. In suits.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Like this. No one's talking.

[Bobby Lee]

Of course.

[Andrew Santino]

Nine people. And I go, I'm going to leave this. This is not a party.

[Bobby Lee]

It's midsommar.

[Andrew Santino]

It's midsummer.

[Bobby Lee]

It really is. But you change the vibe when you come.

[Andrew Santino]

I did. And we took us outside. And it made it so much better.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, yes. No. His friends are very weird.

[Andrew Santino]

Can I be honest with you right now? Yeah, absolutely.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Friday night, when your brothers and his friends came to my Minnesota show, some

[Andrew Santino]

of the weirdest people on planet.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. And they try to be. You know what I loved about your bro? Because you gave them a talk. Did you not? Yeah. Yeah. You go. Try to be more engaging. Right. So they're trying to smile and go, thanks, Bob. Right. But I know that it's because you gave them a pep talk. So I don't believe what they're saying. Yeah, yeah. They have to believe in it. They get scared of the Hollywood of it all. They're not used. I'm not Hollywood. Why do you think we're doing this podcast?

[Andrew Santino]

Good. Not yelling. Good. Take it down.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. Is that a part of the thing?

[Andrew Santino]

What is that?

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Is that you at Disclosure Day? Did you see the movie? Yeah, that's why I left last. Yeah. What do you think? What do you think of the movie? I'm not gonna say anything because. I know. But is it good or bad? It looks like a cardboard. Yeah. It's so crazy. Why'd you crop off? Why'd you crop out? Steven Spielberg, dude.

[Andrew Santino]

Zoom in.

[Bobby Lee]

He wasn't next to you. Look, look, look.

[Andrew Santino]

Are you looking for a condominium in Marina Del Rey. Dude, you look so.

[Bobby Lee]

So crazy funny.

[Andrew Santino]

That is such a. It's like a press poster.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. And did you purposely expose some of your belly, or is that a new fashion thing new to this area?

[Andrew Santino]

Come to Trivia Night at the local pub. You're running for, like, state something. State government.

[Bobby Lee]

That's insane.

[Andrew Santino]

Girls, how are you?

[Rudy]

We're good.

[Andrew Santino]

New glasses?

[Rudy]

No, I don't wear contacts.

[Andrew Santino]

But you never wear. I've never seen you in those. Have you worn these to the show?

[Rudy]

No.

[Andrew Santino]

No, I've never seen those. You wear contacts?

[Rudy]

Yeah, I do.

[Andrew Santino]

What are those? Just sunglasses.

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Let me see. Put them on. Let's see.

[Bobby Lee]

She thinks he's Bono.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Let me see Bono.

[Bobby Lee]

Let's go, Bono. Yeah, let's go. Let's go, Bono. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Where the streets have no name. Say that. Where the streets. Go ahead.

[Andrew Santino]

Where they're from, the streets don't have names.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. So can I tell you this? Something that happened.

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Right. And just give me your best judgment as a. There's a couple of things I want to say.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay?

[Bobby Lee]

Okay.

[Rudy]

All right.

[Bobby Lee]

As a compadre.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

As a patriot.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

America first.

[Andrew Santino]

God bless. Yeah, girl, say america first real fast.

[Rudy]

America first.

[Andrew Santino]

Thank you.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. You don't believe it, though. Yeah. There's no belief system.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You can tell.

[Bobby Lee]

So I was. We're on a little break on our tour. So I said to the Comedy Store and everybody, I go, you know, I'm taking a week off.

[Andrew Santino]

Nice.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't want to stand up. I want to relax, hang out with my girlfriend. Hang out with the family. All right. And I had a friend call and say, you said you were going to be performing a couple of months ago on a Saturday night, this specific Saturday night, which is last night. And I go, yeah, but I'm not. You know, I didn't call in, so. But my family's in town. You know, it's a whole thing that we're coming.

[Andrew Santino]

Did you tell her you were going to be there that night?

[Bobby Lee]

A couple of months ago? I think she had texted me saying that, like, are you performing whatever the day it is. Right. So I go, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, is. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

That's 20.

[Bobby Lee]

That's $20.

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

That some of my isms, if I give. I say them, I have to give $5.

[Andrew Santino]

Anyway. So look, so you did. May have said, which we do all the time. They go, do you perform on Saturday in, like, August? You're like, I don't Know, man, it's June. Yeah, probably, I guess I have no idea.

[Bobby Lee]

So that's what happened.

[Andrew Santino]

Right. I understand.

[Bobby Lee]

And so all week, this person'. Um, you're not. I go, I'm taking a break. You're not. And so finally, Friday, which is a couple days ago, I say, I called the Comedy Store, Rose. I go, is there any way you can just slot me into the main room at 8? And so when you do that, what do they do? They have to readjust. Call everyone and go.

[Andrew Santino]

Somebody gets bumped.

[Bobby Lee]

Somebody gets bumped. You know, there's, you know. Then I go reserve a table. They. Mitzi's table. They reserved.

[Andrew Santino]

Very nice.

[Bobby Lee]

Right. And then I was also invited to. I'm not gonna drop a name. Should I Don't want to.

[Andrew Santino]

Why not?

[Bobby Lee]

Because I'm like you.

[Andrew Santino]

I mean, people who know.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Elmo laugh. Five more dollars. Close.

[Bobby Lee]

That was close enough.

[Andrew Santino]

All right, five more dollars.

[Bobby Lee]

This person invited me. Rock star. I can say that.

[Andrew Santino]

Ace freely.

[Bobby Lee]

Close.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay, close.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. A guy that's in a band. It was like, hey, do you. Do you and your girlfriend want to hang out and go watch. Have dinner and watch a movie? And I said, I can't because I have to do this show Saturday night. Right.

[Andrew Santino]

I mean, no, but you go ahead.

[Bobby Lee]

What would you have said?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, I'd rather hang out with you.

[Bobby Lee]

Right. So I said I was not. That's not what I did.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay, so you did the show for these people.

[Bobby Lee]

So, yeah. So I show up at the Comedy Store and I go to the COVID booth and I go, are my people here? Main room? They're like, they haven't checked in yet, but show just started.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, no.

[Bobby Lee]

I know. And then I'm on stage, and you can see Mitzi's section. You see the booth from stage. No one's in there.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, my.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay, no one's in there. What? Why are you shaking your head? It's crazy.

[Andrew Santino]

We're in agreements. It's insane. Right?

[Bobby Lee]

Right.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

And number one also, it's like, they could have sold those seats. Yeah, they could have for a lot of money.

[Andrew Santino]

And they're very expensive.

[Bobby Lee]

They're very expensive.

[Andrew Santino]

Those are like, nice seats.

[Rudy]

Right?

[Bobby Lee]

And then afterwards, I go to the COVID booth. I go, are you sure they checked in? They're not in Mitzi's section. And they're like, I'm telling you, no one's checked. No one had a guest list.

[Andrew Santino]

Did you text her?

[Bobby Lee]

No, I didn't text her. I just let it go. I went to dinner with my girlfriend afterwards.

[Andrew Santino]

Check in with the people.

[Bobby Lee]

I was so mad. I was so mad, I couldn't even text.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay, time out.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

What if they tried to go? Their name wasn't on the list, and they were like, well, we don't want to bother them, and they just left.

[Bobby Lee]

There's no way that could happen. I'm.

[Andrew Santino]

That definitely can happen.

[Bobby Lee]

I know, but they have my number directly.

[Andrew Santino]

But you didn't text her after she didn't show. So maybe she showed up, couldn't get in, and didn't want to bother you.

[Bobby Lee]

Mike, the COVID booth goes, we promise you, no one came up and said, we're on Bobby's list. After, I'm going to tell you what happened. I'm at dinner. She texts us. So I tell her my show is at 8 with her, you know, and she. At 9:30, she's like, we were at the store. We're. Our dinner ran late.

[Andrew Santino]

And this is why you don't do that.

[Bobby Lee]

Right. And I go, I didn't respond to it good. Then today, what happened?

[Rudy]

She went over, came to my house.

[Andrew Santino]

She. This woman came to your home?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. She's a dear friend.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh. I was like, what is.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, she came to my home and. What? Why don't you love me?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

What?

[Rudy]

She went with four Lucky Boy burritos,

[Bobby Lee]

which is my favorite breakfast burrito.

[Andrew Santino]

We know.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Rudy]

And then six. Six fresh eggs from her own chicken farm.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, I don't want those.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I don't want those. I don't do four eggs. I. I don't do eggs that aren't free range.

[Andrew Santino]

No, I got a free range.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah. Are they free range?

[Andrew Santino]

No, they're from.

[Bobby Lee]

They're from North. No, you've never been there.

[Andrew Santino]

They're Northridge range.

[Bobby Lee]

Northridge? Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

It's in her backyard.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Rudy]

Her kid was there.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Her kid was there.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. She tried to use that as.

[Bobby Lee]

As a sympathy card.

[Andrew Santino]

Right?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

How old is the kid?

[Rudy]

Six.

[Andrew Santino]

That's so mean.

[Bobby Lee]

It's so mean.

[Andrew Santino]

Boy. A little boy.

[Bobby Lee]

Girl.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh. Even worse.

[Bobby Lee]

I love her because she's like, good to see you. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

It's one of those. Right? What I said was. I said, you don't want to see her. I don't want to see her. And I go say that I left with my girlfriend in her car. So I was just in my room when they were at the house.

[Andrew Santino]

Awesome.

[Bobby Lee]

Right?

[Andrew Santino]

So she was in your home. She's hearing this now? She's in your home?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And you never said hi?

[Bobby Lee]

No way.

[Andrew Santino]

He never came out?

[Rudy]

No. So we had to entertain.

[Andrew Santino]

How, how, how long was she there?

[Rudy]

Like 30 minutes.

[Andrew Santino]

That's not bad.

[Bobby Lee]

That's not bad.

[Andrew Santino]

That's not bad. I, in my mind was like, she stayed for.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, but you have now. You have to understand that's a horror movie. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You can't leave your room.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

She's like, you know, I think I'll sleep over. See when he gets back tomorrow.

[Bobby Lee]

I understand you try to get out of your house, but now while this is happening, I'm sitting in my room on one of my chairs like this for 30 minutes.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay, that's not that bad. Just lay down.

[Bobby Lee]

And I keep texting. Is she gone yet? They're like, no, she's still here.

[Andrew Santino]

Could be doing sit ups.

[Bobby Lee]

I stopped doing that because you know why I stopped doing that? The discouragement.

[Andrew Santino]

I thought it was 100 a day, right?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I started doing Good morning. Yeah, yeah. Cash App.

[Andrew Santino]

You've heard it, you know it. And when you get the Cash App card, not only do you get access to a ton of perks and benefits like exclusive early access to nationwide concert pre sales or discounts on popular brands, you also have extra security with the power to instantly lock or unlock your card right from your phone in just one tap. I've had my, my card stolen. I was going to say my phone because my credit card was connected to my phone and my wallet and man, would it have been nice.

[Bobby Lee]

Yes.

[Andrew Santino]

To tap and stop all that.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, if a suspicious transaction pops up on your card, Cash App has your back by automatically declining the purchase and sending you a heads up to confirm.

[Andrew Santino]

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[Bobby Lee]

Discounts and promotions provided by Cash App, a Block Inc. Brand visit Cash App Legal podcast for full disclosure.

[Andrew Santino]

Superpower.

[Bobby Lee]

I love Superpower because I don't know what's going on with my body.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, I don't often know what's going on with my body. Some days it feels great, some days it feels not as so good. Huh.

[Bobby Lee]

It's one simple blood draw that gives you information on over a hundred of your blood biomarkers, which is way more than what you're usually getting during a normal doctor's visit. And it unlocks a real understanding of your body that is proactive and performance enhancing healthcare that dives deep into why and the underlying cause of various symptoms you may be experiencing.

[Andrew Santino]

So I just went to the doctor this morning. Okay. And they do a blood draw at the doctor and you know you have to tell them what you want all the time. But the Superpower app includes detailed information on your heart, liver, thyroid, hormones, metabolism, vitamin mineral levels, even environmental toxins. So. So disease prevention is huge. And treating that annoying brain fog, simply optimizing your gym, your gym game. Superpower is the most comprehensive and advanced system out there. They send a licensed professional to your home or you can visit a nearby lab. And I gotta tell you, they sent someone to us which was very, very cool. So we're gonna tell you what the draw looks like. I hope I'm, I'm, I'm drunk in all sorts of I'm drawing, but I don't know. You get your biological age and pace of aging and they can tell you supplement recommendations and Superpower gives you access to high end concierge level care at the best price on the market. They're the most affordable 100 plus biomarker blood test. Starting at $199. And is HSA FSA eligible. You can unlock your new health intelligence.

[Bobby Lee]

Make this year you stopping guessing about your health with Superpower.

[Andrew Santino]

For a limited time, our listeners get 20 off to unlock their new health intelligence. Head over to superpower.com and use the code BAD FRIENDS for $20 off your $199 superpower membership.

[Bobby Lee]

And after you sign up, they'll ask you how you heard about Superpower. Tell them Bad Friends sent you to support the show Hexclad. I'm on a new health kick and I've been cooking for the first time.

[Andrew Santino]

I know you're a big chef.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I bet. No, I've been scrambling eggs And I want great cookware. So I got some from Hexclad. And let me tell you something, they're premium stuff.

[Andrew Santino]

No, it is amazing. By the way, stainless steel works amazing. But cleanup can be very brutal. With Hexclad, they give you a proper sear, great heat control, and the cleanup that doesn't turn into a whole second job after dinner. The, the greatest part about Hexclad is they sent us these. And when you're cooking, stuff gets stuck to the pan, especially if you're cooking with sauces and all sorts of stuff. And with Hexclad, it does not do that. And they're also oven safe, up to 900 degrees. They're awesome.

[Bobby Lee]

Old non stick pan scratch, right? They peel, they wear out fast. The heat distribution is terrible. Hex clad gives you proper sear, great heat control and cleanup that doesn't turn into whole second job after dinner.

[Andrew Santino]

It's literally the last set of pots and pans you're ever gonna need to buy. I'm telling you, they sent us some. Thank you so much. And it's.

[Bobby Lee]

Tell them a 12 piece set.

[Andrew Santino]

They have this 12 piece set. It's got, it's got pots, pans.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, let me ask you, what else is it like, did they have a family sized stock pot?

[Andrew Santino]

You better believe it. And every single one of those included in the, in the 12 piece set has its own lid. So don't go through another.

[Bobby Lee]

What about the warranty? Is our warranty.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, my God, it's lifetime.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, my Lord. It's like I'm a Highlander. I could use. If I was a Highlander, I could use it for the rest of my life.

[Andrew Santino]

Don't go through another summer with cookware that makes every meal harder than it needs to be. For a limited time only, our listeners get 10% off your order with our exclusive link. Just head to hexclad.com bad friends support

[Bobby Lee]

our show and check them out at H e x c l-a d.com forward/bad friends.

[Andrew Santino]

Make sure to let them know we sent you.

[Bobby Lee]

What is going on here?

[Andrew Santino]

You know what's going on.

[Bobby Lee]

I did a book signing. You laugh, you know,

[Andrew Santino]

You saying I did a book signing is so funny.

[Bobby Lee]

I know, but it's, it's.

[Andrew Santino]

It's somebody on the Internet meme. Real face, go.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm sorry for calling you Pippy up front. That was wrong. I think that's what it is. I apologize.

[Andrew Santino]

You know what?

[Bobby Lee]

But let me ask you something as

[Andrew Santino]

my friend who's an author. Thank you. Very much. Stop it.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. Anyway. Is. Anyway.

[Andrew Santino]

Is anyway up there? What is anyway an ism. Just a natural transition?

[Bobby Lee]

It's a natural transition. Yeah. So then you can't put any way up there. No, you can't. How am I going to transition then? There's no way to transition only. Okay. During transition. Okay, so.

[Andrew Santino]

So this woman was there for 30 minutes, and then. How did you get. Did you say goodbye? How did she.

[Rudy]

No, because we're really close with her.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, okay. You know her well enough.

[Bobby Lee]

She's family.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, she's so close that you lied to her and didn't see her while she was at your home. I mean, she must be close friends.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, because I was. I would be enraged.

[Andrew Santino]

You're right.

[Bobby Lee]

Would you be enraged?

[Andrew Santino]

I'll tell you something. They wouldn't be in my home.

[Bobby Lee]

That's what I'm saying.

[Andrew Santino]

I would call and go, hey, man, you bailed. They saved that seat. That's kind of fucked up. Which, by the way, this happened to me, but this happened to all of us. Where people go, we're coming. We're cut. My. Somebody told me one time, they go. I was like, you didn't. Did you not show up? They were like, we didn't see you. We were there. We left.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, they're in a different room.

[Andrew Santino]

They went to the or. And I was like, did you say, I'm Andrew Santino's guest? Because they would have gone, he's in there. They're like, no.

[Bobby Lee]

It's like, okay, well, that's why you.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't know what you want me.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm specific. I'm like, main room. The show starts at 7. I'm up at this time.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

You mean talk to this person?

[Andrew Santino]

And then they text you and go, hey, what time do you go on? What time does the show start? Yeah, what room is it in?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And you're like, look up. I point. I do the arrow. I go, look up. Look at the text. Two texts ago, I just said all of it.

[Bobby Lee]

Or, look up at the billboard. Yeah, there's a main room thing and an or thing. Right. And you could just look at her. And we're always on the billboard.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

So it's like, just look at the billboard.

[Andrew Santino]

Look at the billboard.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, so I'm at dinner, 9:30. She goes, you know. I mean, oh, dinner ran late. Right. So what would you do?

[Andrew Santino]

You would say she was really sorry, though.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't care. I don't give a.

[Andrew Santino]

That. That is also.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Urban Bob. I would not. You're smart to not text to get mad. But when they talk to you again,

[Bobby Lee]

just go, no, it's forever dead.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, I would say it's not.

[Bobby Lee]

It's forever dead.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, I go, it's not cool.

[Bobby Lee]

Forever dead. I wanna be forever dead.

[Andrew Santino]

Do you really wanna die?

[Bobby Lee]

Forever.

[Rudy]

Forever.

[Andrew Santino]

Do you guys know that song?

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

What is. What shirt is that rocks.

[Bobby Lee]

Roxy music. Oh, it's mine.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, that's a cool. I was just gonna say.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Is that a Bobby distressed?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, it's a distress. I didn't like the distress. I think it just said it too much. So I gave it to her.

[Rudy]

Gives me his failure one. So I have a lot of new shirts.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Y.

[Rudy]

Like every morning he's on the dining table just scratching, all scraping away.

[Andrew Santino]

He's gotta. That's his new hobby. He's Bobby distressed.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Rudy]

All the coffee things in the pool.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, we already talked about it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So I already said it last time.

[Andrew Santino]

Who had to clean out the pool?

[Bobby Lee]

My cool pool guy.

[Andrew Santino]

What did he say?

[Bobby Lee]

He's like. I don't know.

[Rudy]

I think he's really worried.

[Bobby Lee]

He was worried.

[Rudy]

I don't know what happened.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. It's actually not a good.

[Bobby Lee]

Why is your pool black?

[Andrew Santino]

Coffee grounds are going to get in the filter system. You don't buy it. You'll probably buy.

[Bobby Lee]

No, it's. It's instant coffee.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, it's okay.

[Bobby Lee]

It's not ground.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, it's fine.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah, it's fine.

[Andrew Santino]

That's totally fine.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah. So that's another thing, because when you take a white shirt and you soak it, if anyone wants to distress their shirt. Right.

[Andrew Santino]

Don't give away your secrets.

[Bobby Lee]

Right. You take a whole bottle of hot water.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

You put hot water in a bucket.

[Rudy]

It.

[Bobby Lee]

And I take you. Do you want to. Are you interested? Yeah. I feel like you're not.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm listening.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. And you take. Pour the coffee in it. Instant coffee. Right. And you let it sit for there for days.

[Andrew Santino]

And then do you scratch it with rocks?

[Rudy]

Sandpaper.

[Bobby Lee]

Sandpaper. But here's.

[Andrew Santino]

Go get some rocks.

[Bobby Lee]

Nope. Here's what I just found out. And I found a. A trick.

[Andrew Santino]

Do you want to give this away?

[Bobby Lee]

I do. Because it's. It's free knowledge for everybody.

[Andrew Santino]

Good.

[Bobby Lee]

But I had a wardrobe for this movie I'm doing, and I asked the wardrobe lady because they know all about distressing.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

And I. And I'm telling her all these things I'm doing. She's like, just go to this company. Just do It. Oh, yeah. So I'm just gonna. So what I'm doing. But they go. They do it in bulk. So you need 12 shirts at least.

[Andrew Santino]

You got 12.

[Bobby Lee]

No, I'm saving. I have like four or five arrived. I'm waiting for seven more. I'm gonna bring it in and, you know, and it has they. No holes. Rock wash. And then I'll put paint and I'll do a little bit more distressing.

[Andrew Santino]

But, you know, you should just throw them in your dryer and then throw some rocks in there.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't know what it'll do. It's.

[Andrew Santino]

Let's test. Let's figure it out. You put coffee in your pool.

[Bobby Lee]

That is true.

[Andrew Santino]

This is like Brewster's Millions or something. Like, a kid gets a house, he's like, let's put coffee in the pool. That's insane. It's insane.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I want to build a slide on my bedroom window.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. And. And. And I, I. I also want to publicly. From these two friends of mine that, you know, publicly announced that I'm uk.

[Andrew Santino]

So you're. You're United Kingdom?

[Bobby Lee]

No. Uno king.

[Andrew Santino]

The UNO king.

[Bobby Lee]

Right.

[Andrew Santino]

We talked about that. Yeah. You're the Uno.

[Rudy]

He won. He won six games in a row.

[Bobby Lee]

Five.

[Andrew Santino]

But he is using tactics like threats and bribery.

[Rudy]

He is?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Rudy]

Yeah. He tried to bribe our mom and he got really mad that she did. He didn't.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, that is what kings would do. Kings would bribe. Kings are big bribers, dude.

[Bobby Lee]

We. We colonize.

[Andrew Santino]

And you know what they are in the kingdom? What? I found this out last night. They're goop farmers. Do you know what a goop farmer is?

[Bobby Lee]

No, I don't know what a goop farmer.

[Andrew Santino]

You're looking at two of them.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. It sounds racist.

[Andrew Santino]

It's not Goop farmer.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. In medieval, there's one letter for being racist.

[Andrew Santino]

Goop do. Medieval times. It's called a goop picker or a goop farmer. What they do is. Oh, sorry. Go. What is it?

[Bobby Lee]

Gong farmer.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, gong farmer. A knight. Sorry.

[Bobby Lee]

Back up, back up, back up, back up, back up. What you call them? Goop farmer. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Nowhere near, but goop sounded funny.

[Bobby Lee]

But a gong farmer is a wife.

[Rudy]

What?

[Andrew Santino]

A gong farmer. Medieval and Tudor heir laborer responsible for manually removing human waste from city cesspiss and castle privies. So when you were in the castle, they have video of this. They would poop off the side of the castle in, like, a chute. And then they had to go clean up the poop and wheelbarrow it away. They were compensated very well. They said this was a very good job. Picking up poop was one of the best jobs.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, because you have to imagine in a castle, right? You're pooping out of a hole and

[Andrew Santino]

just off the side of the wall.

[Bobby Lee]

Off the side of a wall. Probably five stories off. Up the wall. Must be.

[Andrew Santino]

Look at that.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, that's. Yeah, that's it. Oh, my God. Imagine.

[Andrew Santino]

And there's this.

[Bobby Lee]

Once a year, they have to do the canal, you know, I mean, the canal cleaning.

[Andrew Santino]

Gotta clean it some.

[Bobby Lee]

Some like a little Brad Williams. That's a.

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

And get up there.

[Andrew Santino]

And he would get stuck. So they would tie someone's foot and just pull them down.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, it's. It's a Shawshank Redemption kind of a situation.

[Andrew Santino]

Gong farming.

[Bobby Lee]

Remember when he escaped? Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You guys are gong farmers.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, You're a gong farmer. But me, good money. That's a cool job.

[Rudy]

Job.

[Andrew Santino]

It's a very good job.

[Bobby Lee]

You guys aren't good with smells, though.

[Rudy]

I can't smell.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay, well, then you'd be good at gun. Finally. Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Did you guys go to McCone's birthday?

[Bobby Lee]

Tristan was there.

[Andrew Santino]

Why didn't you guys go?

[Rudy]

I had to babysit, and then I got really tired.

[Andrew Santino]

Why didn't you go?

[Rudy]

I didn't even know about it.

[Andrew Santino]

Wow.

[Bobby Lee]

Interesting.

[Andrew Santino]

It was really.

[Bobby Lee]

I didn't.

[Andrew Santino]

Really fun.

[Bobby Lee]

I didn't get invited as well, you know.

[Andrew Santino]

You know he did.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah. You have to direct invite me. You can't put me in a group chat. Our direct text message. All right, let me. I'm gonna look it up. Yeah, I'm sorry.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, you should.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I'm gonna look it up right now because I knew you'd make a thing out of it.

[Andrew Santino]

And then I. As soon as I went to leave, I go, what do you need? What's going on? And McCone goes, Can I have $100?

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, it's this. Yeah. It's a partiful invite. Okay, so what I. What I want to say, this is. Sometimes you send me videos. No, I'm being real. This is like. Like, check out this silly video on, like, your TikTok.

[Andrew Santino]

He does, right?

[Bobby Lee]

And so then I'll click on it, and it's the most uninteresting ever watched. So in my mind, I'm like, oh, it's just one of his silly tik toks.

[Andrew Santino]

Sure.

[Bobby Lee]

It says McCone is 27. And as I don't even read them, if I see a square thing and it looks like a video I, I just, I, I just ignore it.

[Andrew Santino]

You can't Particle, Bobby.

[Bobby Lee]

You can't. Part of me.

[Andrew Santino]

You got a co. You got write in a text what it is.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And then send it to particle. He's never going to open.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't know what it is.

[Andrew Santino]

He doesn't know how to do that.

[Bobby Lee]

I, I, I do know how to press a button.

[Andrew Santino]

He doesn't know how.

[Bobby Lee]

Yes, I do. Dude, I could do it right now.

[Andrew Santino]

Well then why didn't you do it for his birthday?

[Bobby Lee]

Because I thought it was a tick tock video. I'm sorry, I'm raising my voice. Yeah. And you're leaving Tuesday and we're gonna miss you.

[Andrew Santino]

Wait, where are you going?

[Rudy]

Back home.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, no, no.

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

And, and so is your mom.

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

How long are you guys going to be gone for?

[Rudy]

Well, she's gonna be gone for the whole year. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Until Trump's out of office, I guess. Huh.

[Bobby Lee]

Yep. Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Wait, you're gonna be gone for the rest of the year?

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And then maybe come back next year.

[Rudy]

Yeah. Because immediately when I get back, my school starts. Words.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay, so what I want to ask, and it's not a personal thing. Right. But you guys have two younger brothers.

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Who I don't know at all. Can they come instead?

[Rudy]

They don't have visa. They don't have visas yet.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay, get them a visa, Bob.

[Bobby Lee]

I'll get a visa. Yeah. Now here's my worry, Andrew, and if you can, if you can help me, please, because we have, I have familiars living with me, you know, and you are a familiar. You call them gun farmers. I call them familiars.

[Andrew Santino]

I actually call them goop farmers on accident. But gong is the right.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Gong sounds more rich, so.

[Bobby Lee]

And it gong does sound more. Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You gong piece of. What you doing on my neighborhood or whatever.

[Andrew Santino]

Get out of here, you go, farmer.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. Anyway, the, that's another transition.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Another transition.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, he's transitioning.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm transitioning. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Go ahead, get another five.

[Andrew Santino]

30.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. $30. So my, your mother is my housekeeper, essentially.

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. She's gonna be gone for three months now.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. What are you gonna do?

[Bobby Lee]

Well, she promises me that this one right here will clean, pick up the slack, huh? Yeah, but she won't.

[Rudy]

Yeah, I will.

[Bobby Lee]

No, you won't. So what I'm asking you is, do you know anybody that can help me?

[Rudy]

Yeah, I will, I swear.

[Bobby Lee]

No, no, you don't, you don't. I will if it's Front row. Justin Bieber. You will.

[Andrew Santino]

That's exactly.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. If it's Sabrina Carpenter, you will, right? Clean the house. You won't.

[Rudy]

I already promise you I'll clean.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, but when you ever. Yeah, but whenever you've done it, it's not good. What's this? Topless cleaning. I don't want that. But turn that off. What are you doing? Carlos.

[Andrew Santino]

Carlos.

[Bobby Lee]

Carlos, what are you doing? Oh, Dream made. No, no. Carlos. Top.

[Andrew Santino]

Is that who you use? Dream made.

[Bobby Lee]

No, I just do it myself. Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

How about McCone? McCone can clean your house. He always says he loves cleaning houses.

[Bobby Lee]

Are you good at cleaning houses? I'm pretty good. Yeah. My own.

[Andrew Santino]

But other people for money. He can be good.

[Bobby Lee]

You could if I gave you. Let me.

[Rudy]

You think what cold's better than me?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Whoa. Yeah. Because he. He's scared of me.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, he is. That's true.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. You're not. Yeah, you. It's like living with a fourth dimensional ghost when everyone's gone.

[Andrew Santino]

That's.

[Bobby Lee]

So we don't say hi. We don't scared him. She doesn't acknowledge me.

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

No, you don't. Yeah, I do. You don't acknowledge me. It's fine. I don't want to acknowledge you either.

[Rudy]

I said.

[Bobby Lee]

Right. But what I'm saying.

[Rudy]

And you're just like.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, all right. So I never made that noise. I've never made that noise before. My. I've never done that. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. So what? I don't want to get angry. I was trying to be calm.

[Andrew Santino]

Make it easy, baby.

[Bobby Lee]

I know. I'm trying to relax.

[Rudy]

Why? He was like in Uno.

[Andrew Santino]

He was slick back Bob. Slick back Bob.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. I betrayed even my girlfriend at Uno.

[Andrew Santino]

Be slick back Bob. Right now.

[Rudy]

Good.

[Andrew Santino]

Slick back Bob. That Slick back Bob. There he is.

[Bobby Lee]

I need help because I live in a house. She's not going to do it.

[Andrew Santino]

She's not.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I have you. I have someone. That's amazing.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. So thank you so much.

[Andrew Santino]

I would love to present her your way. No, you're done. How about this?

[Bobby Lee]

I'll give you a shot.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. She has to prove herself.

[Bobby Lee]

I'll give you a shot. I'm so scared. So you're going to. You're going to fold my underwear the way your mom folds them?

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. No, you're not. No. No way. You're just gonna throw them in there where they get all crinkly.

[Rudy]

I will. I'll call her. I'll ask how she folds it.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. No, no, no. This is what she does. This is what she does.

[Andrew Santino]

Have you never seen them?

[Bobby Lee]

Her.

[Andrew Santino]

You've never seen her do it?

[Rudy]

No.

[Bobby Lee]

So what she does is she'll put clothes in the dryer, right. Then I'll come home. Right? And there's a literal pyramid of clothes on top of the dryer.

[Andrew Santino]

And those are the clean ones.

[Bobby Lee]

Those are the clean ones.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay, very nice.

[Bobby Lee]

While she's washing other things, right. The pyramid becomes bigger and bigger. Right? And then it becomes Giza. The pyramid of Giza.

[Andrew Santino]

It is.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. And then I'm like. And then what happens when you dry clothing and you don't fold them immediately? Tell me what happens.

[Andrew Santino]

Wrinkles.

[Bobby Lee]

Wrinkles, baby. Those wrinkles, baby. Right.

[Andrew Santino]

Building the clothing pyramid of Giza.

[Bobby Lee]

Of Giza. Yeah. And so that's what I don't want. Right. I also. This is not.

[Rudy]

My test is going to come.

[Bobby Lee]

No, she's not fold your clothes. A 90 year old lady is outsource it to outsourcing a 90 year old lady. That's insane.

[Andrew Santino]

That's crazy.

[Bobby Lee]

That's crazy. She has apps.

[Rudy]

Yeah, she has.

[Bobby Lee]

She has cleaning apps.

[Rudy]

Yeah, she has.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, abs. Oh, I thought she was like,

[Andrew Santino]

this has a phone.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Clean this room.

[Andrew Santino]

Room clean.

[Bobby Lee]

Clean. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Hey, you got to prove yourself somehow.

[Rudy]

Somehow I will.

[Andrew Santino]

You know what you should make her do?

[Bobby Lee]

What?

[Andrew Santino]

Clean the outside of the house. It needs a good washing because of all the dirt from the trees and the storms.

[Rudy]

He. He doesn't even care about.

[Andrew Santino]

Yes, he does.

[Bobby Lee]

I do care.

[Rudy]

Like vinegar because of him.

[Andrew Santino]

No.

[Bobby Lee]

What do you mean by that?

[Rudy]

And there's so much stains everywhere. And it's just his shirts laying out in the sun. And it's like all kinds of colors out there. Even our mom gave up on it. Yeah,

[Bobby Lee]

you don't make that noise. Made that noise. Yeah, that's another five.

[Andrew Santino]

It's like 40 bucks now.

[Bobby Lee]

It's 40 bucks.

[Andrew Santino]

He also repeated me twice. And we're up to. We're cruising.

[Bobby Lee]

We're cruising. Yeah, we're doing. Or I'll give you. I'll give me. That's another one I just repeated. Cruising. Yeah, Another five.

[Andrew Santino]

That's amazing.

[Bobby Lee]

That's not a thing.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

You've never repeated a word that I've said.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't like to sound like you.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay, okay. All right, that's fair.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Here.

[Andrew Santino]

Anyway.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

If I say.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah, thank you. Thank you.

[Andrew Santino]

Anyway, anyway, the thing is, is this.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm gonna. That's another five. I'm gonna give. I'm gonna. One day I'm gonna L o. I'm gonna move a couch.

[Rudy]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm gonna look underneath. See, there's a difference, Andrew, between surface cleaning.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

And deep cleaning.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. You got to.

[Bobby Lee]

Got give me the difference. Tell me some of the difference.

[Andrew Santino]

Surface cleaning is when you're just going over just what's what to the eye, what's available.

[Bobby Lee]

What's available.

[Andrew Santino]

Deep cleaning is what's not available. Under the beds, under the couches, behind the refrigerator. You got to pull that thing out. You got to pull that thing out. Yeah, you do.

[Rudy]

Can I deep clean once a week instead of every day?

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, never every day.

[Rudy]

Deep clean?

[Bobby Lee]

No, not everyday. Deep clean. You do clean every day?

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Deep clean once a week?

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

Maybe twice if. If you feel like.

[Bobby Lee]

If I feel like it?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Rudy]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. And I'm just going to do that symbol.

[Andrew Santino]

That's how you know.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you're going to like, oh, okay.

[Rudy]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

And then you're like, I'm busy.

[Rudy]

Well, I got.

[Bobby Lee]

I got things to do. Yeah. So what's your job?

[Andrew Santino]

The baby can clean.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, the baby.

[Andrew Santino]

That baby can clean.

[Bobby Lee]

One years old now.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Once you're one, you can start cleaning.

[Bobby Lee]

Can you walk? Yeah, he can clean.

[Rudy]

The baby.

[Bobby Lee]

If you can walk, he can clean.

[Rudy]

Baby's obsessed with you. To Bobby.

[Andrew Santino]

The baby's walking around a lot.

[Bobby Lee]

Hot. Yeah. The baby is saying my. Says my name all the time.

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

How?

[Bobby Lee]

Bobby.

[Andrew Santino]

Bobby, Bobby. Oh. So it's clear.

[Bobby Lee]

Even if. If he hears me in the phone, he'll yell my name.

[Rudy]

We ask him, like, who's your favorite person? He says, bobby.

[Andrew Santino]

We should get him on the show. Can he get on the show?

[Bobby Lee]

No, he's too young.

[Andrew Santino]

Let's put him on the show.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, he, he. He'll cry. He doesn't. He can't conceptualize what this is. All he says is this deep, deep, gross orange.

[Andrew Santino]

You're talking about me.

[Bobby Lee]

No. Yeah. And this color. It would freak him out.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Too much.

[Bobby Lee]

It's too much.

[Andrew Santino]

I get it.

[Bobby Lee]

To see all these paintings, he would think that he was in another world.

[Andrew Santino]

He isn't here.

[Bobby Lee]

He's in another world. Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm sad that you're gonna go home. That sucks. I mean, that's good.

[Bobby Lee]

So what do you. What? So since you've been. How long you've been in America?

[Rudy]

Four months.

[Bobby Lee]

Four months. What have you been doing?

[Rudy]

I've been.

[Andrew Santino]

Have you learned anything?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. What have you been doing?

[Rudy]

Like, I've just been walking around.

[Andrew Santino]

Why? Huh?

[Rudy]

I've been walking around.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. I'll drive around. I'll see that. I've. Drive. I've driven past you before and you don't even acknowledge my presence.

[Rudy]

Wait, I do. You don't acknowledge me?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Where are you going?

[Rudy]

I'm going to, like, the coffee shop.

[Bobby Lee]

You go to Alfred's?

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

That's the only place you're going? No, I'm going to Give me some other coffee shops in that area.

[Rudy]

Like the books and coffee one.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, the books and coffee. Yeah.

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

There's a wit. Have you ever been to the witch's brew? Or there's. There's a.

[Andrew Santino]

No, but I just think this is America. What have. What have you been doing? Walking.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Coffee.

[Bobby Lee]

Coffee. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Nothing. Really. Nothing. So you really took advantage of coming to America.

[Bobby Lee]

And she'll do stuff like this. I'll go, hey, me and my girlfriend are going to go to dinner. You want to come? She goes, no.

[Andrew Santino]

What do you eat? Oh.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, thank you for asking.

[Andrew Santino]

I'll tell you what, they ate like Chipotle every day.

[Bobby Lee]

I'll tell you what they eat.

[Andrew Santino]

What?

[Bobby Lee]

Thank you so much for asking.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay. You're welcome.

[Bobby Lee]

Thank you. What they eat is. Two weeks ago, I ordered sunun. Dang.

[Rudy]

Oh, my God.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. Which is short rib. It's like in a stew. There's carrots in it. It has. It's like a Vikings like, of meal.

[Rudy]

Right.

[Bobby Lee]

It's the best sunundang. Right. It's been in my fridge for two, three weeks. Okay. Right. And the other day I just see them eating meat. Just like a bone and meat. I'm like. And they're like, oh, it's from. And I'm like, I can order you a new one.

[Rudy]

Why waste?

[Andrew Santino]

That's right. Why waste?

[Bobby Lee]

You think meat for three weeks in a fridge is fine?

[Andrew Santino]

I'm not gonna eat it for them. It's gotta be fine.

[Bobby Lee]

I know, but you think that you Would you eat meat in your refrigerator that's been there for two or three weeks?

[Rudy]

No, we're not having diarrhea. So it's good.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

What do you mean? Well, it's.

[Bobby Lee]

What do you mean, Carlos? Diarrhea. What point? She's Filipino. Stomach. It's different.

[Andrew Santino]

A better question would be, why is it in there for three weeks?

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Why throw it away? Why three weeks?

[Rudy]

We want to keep it.

[Bobby Lee]

They want to keep it.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, it's you.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Well, keep it to me.

[Andrew Santino]

Keep it in your room on the floor then.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, on the room in the floor.

[Andrew Santino]

If you like it so much.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, it's just stacked with old Food.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

And they. They. And then I'll go, hey, I'm gonna get postmates. And they're like, we don't want to eat it.

[Rudy]

It.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, but that's good. They're not wasting money. They're not.

[Bobby Lee]

I paid for it.

[Andrew Santino]

They're not wasting your money.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't care.

[Andrew Santino]

You should.

[Bobby Lee]

Why?

[Andrew Santino]

You should.

[Rudy]

What?

[Bobby Lee]

I don't want to get argument with you. I know you did. That's an ism of yours.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay. But give me a breath. I'll give mone $5. Okay, well, so 95 I own because I already gave him $100 the other day.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. It's an exhausting breath that you do.

[Andrew Santino]

Sorry.

[Bobby Lee]

All right.

[Andrew Santino]

And I'm gonna tell you why I'm concerned about your money. I used all the money we've made on bad friends. I gave it to a guy named Bertie Madoff, and it's not good.

[Bobby Lee]

Warby Parker. Now, listen to me, okay?

[Andrew Santino]

Listen. Hear ye, hear ye.

[Bobby Lee]

Hear y, heary. Hey, hey, hey. Your wife's glasses are so dope, Warby Parker.

[Andrew Santino]

They're so cool.

[Bobby Lee]

So cool. I'm gonna go to Warby Parker. I'm gonna get glasses there.

[Andrew Santino]

You can now, because you know what they do? They do prescriptions.

[Bobby Lee]

That's what I'm doing.

[Andrew Santino]

They make cool shades. You can get whatever prescription you are wearing or need put into them. And by the way, the best part is you can try on the glasses virtually from home, on your phone or iPad or whatever. It feels so real. It you can look and see what it feels like and looks like on your face, in your space.

[Bobby Lee]

They made the whole entire experience even easier. Now you can actually go into one of their stores as well.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

And get an eye exam right there. No running around to multiple spots. No guessing if your prescription is even up to date.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, not anymore. It's easy. Warby Parker's got everything in store, by the way. Cool new styles all the time. Colors, style that are so different than anything that you see that's running around on those racks at the gas station. And by the way, the prescription glasses start at $95. You can actually get quality and stylish frames at an affordable price. And they do like Bob said, eye exams, glasses, contact sunglasses. You don't got to piece it together anymore. They got over 300 retail stores across the United States.

[Bobby Lee]

A lot of stores.

[Andrew Santino]

And, Bob, for every pair of glasses that Warby Parker sells, they give a pair to someone in need, which is huge.

[Rudy]

Huge.

[Andrew Santino]

20 million pairs they've given out through their Buy a pair, give a pair program, which I think is very cool, very huge.

[Bobby Lee]

All right, now you can buy a pair of glasses and get 20 off of any additional [e-mail] Bad Friends that's

[Andrew Santino]

20 off any additional pairs when you purchase one pair at W A R B Y parker.com Bad Friends Ultra.

[Bobby Lee]

You guys ever woken up and immediately needed a nicotine pouch or a cup of coffee just to feel like a human?

[Andrew Santino]

How many pouches, cups of coffee, energy drinks are you guys ripping through on a daily basis? It's not good friends. That's why we're talking about Ultra. This has zero nicotine. Okay? These are truly clean. They're plant powered pouches designed to sharpen your mind, lift your energy, all without caffeine, nicotine or that awful crash that you always experience.

[Bobby Lee]

Look at my mouth right here. I have one in my ass right here.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay, he's got an ultra in there.

[Bobby Lee]

In my mouth. It's been in there for a couple hours.

[Andrew Santino]

Hours.

[Bobby Lee]

I have one in my mouth. These are truly clean plant powered pouches designed to sharpen your mind and lift your energy, all without caffeine, nicotine or crash.

[Andrew Santino]

And that's because nicotine pouches and caffeine, they spike your resting heart rate at night, which kills your body's brain's ability to recover.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay?

[Andrew Santino]

Ultra pouches have a shorter half life than caffeine. They're not going to disrupt your sleep and I gotta tell you, they make me feel much better in the morning because I don't get that insane crash. All right, I'm trying.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm working on hate crashing.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, I'm working on going all to these. They're smooth. There's cool mint, wintergreen, tropical watermelon and blue razz. Blue Raz Ultra is the ultimate guilt free pouch, delivering an instant focus and mental clarity without nicotine or caffeine. New customers can use the code Bad friends to get 15 [e-mail] that's take

[Bobby Lee]

ultra.com for 15 off code bad friends.

[Andrew Santino]

After your purchase, they're going to ask you how'd you hear about them? Support our show and tell them that we sent you.

[Bobby Lee]

Pros save more on what you need

[Andrew Santino]

to get the job done right.

[Bobby Lee]

Right now at Lowe's, get 15 off select custom entry and interior doors. Plus save $80 on the DeWalt 20

[Andrew Santino]

volt max 2 tool combo kit.

[Bobby Lee]

Now just $169. And at the Lowe's pro desk, bring us your materials list and get a quote in minutes. Handwritten photo or even a sticky note

[Andrew Santino]

is all you need. Keep your jobs moving faster and on budget at Lowe's. Valid through 7, 8.

[Bobby Lee]

While supplies last selection varies by location. It's not good.

[Andrew Santino]

It's not good.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. But what I'm saying is if I'm getting a sandwich or a bagel shop and I go, yeah, you guys want to get a little breakfast bagel thing in the morning? And they're like, no thanks. And then they'll go to the fridge and eat the three week year old meat.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, it's good. They're cleaning it out.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay.

[Rudy]

Yeah, I just want to clean it first and then we'll say yes once.

[Andrew Santino]

You guys want to come over to my house and eat all my expired in the fridge, you're more than welcome to. Yeah, it's always in there. We got so much in there.

[Bobby Lee]

A lot of bananas.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh yeah, yeah. Banana bread. Who makes banana?

[Bobby Lee]

No, just bananas.

[Andrew Santino]

Can you make banana bread?

[Rudy]

Mama can make one.

[Andrew Santino]

Can she? For me? Tell her just for me. Yeah, cuz she's.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, she has a bakery.

[Andrew Santino]

She's still got a crush on me, right? Yeah, yeah, like that. Love that. Dude, she's leaving me. Maybe. Maybe I should.

[Bobby Lee]

What do you mean?

[Andrew Santino]

She's going back to the Philippines.

[Bobby Lee]

I know. They'll be back.

[Andrew Santino]

Maybe I should go with her.

[Bobby Lee]

Back? Yeah, they'll be back.

[Andrew Santino]

I leave my life here in Los Angeles for your mom. Be such a great story.

[Rudy]

Yeah, but what about our dad?

[Andrew Santino]

What about him?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, what about your dad?

[Andrew Santino]

What about him?

[Bobby Lee]

I'm sorry.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm the new guy in town.

[Bobby Lee]

He's the new guy. He's the male version of Pippi Longstocking.

[Andrew Santino]

Imagine me at a fucking village in the Philippines.

[Bobby Lee]

You'd be king. They'd be scared.

[Rudy]

Oh yeah. All the girls would.

[Andrew Santino]

Let's do it.

[Bobby Lee]

No, no, no, no, no. Come on.

[Andrew Santino]

Let's rip apart our lives.

[Bobby Lee]

There's no golf courses.

[Andrew Santino]

How many redheaded people do you see in the Philippines?

[Rudy]

I've never seen it.

[Bobby Lee]

Wow. Wow.

[Andrew Santino]

That's me.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

With my wife. Could be white guy, enjoys holidays.

[Bobby Lee]

You and honey, it's in a tent somewhere. Are there black people in the Philippines?

[Rudy]

Yeah, yeah, like our native people.

[Bobby Lee]

What do you mean your native people?

[Andrew Santino]

She's saying people native to the Philippines.

[Rudy]

They're like.

[Bobby Lee]

So there's like a Detroit in the Philippines.

[Andrew Santino]

This, this channel.

[Bobby Lee]

It's the indigenous people. Oh, is. Oh, she. She does look black.

[Rudy]

There's negritos.

[Bobby Lee]

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

[Andrew Santino]

What?

[Bobby Lee]

Little black person?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Well, that's for Spanish. It would be.

[Rudy]

That's our native people.

[Andrew Santino]

Wait a minute. The name is Negrito. Interesting.

[Bobby Lee]

Interesting. Yeah, yeah. Wikipedia is.

[Andrew Santino]

It says zoom in up top.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. You say it then because you're Spanish. Read the whole thing. He's got to say it.

[Andrew Santino]

Thanks.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

It takes it off of me.

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

The word negrito.

[Rudy]

Beautiful.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Be Spanish. The minutive of Negro.

[Andrew Santino]

Say negro.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. Very good. Keep going, Keep going.

[Andrew Santino]

It's used to mean little black person.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Yikes.

[Bobby Lee]

So the lot. Yeah. Doc Willis is out there. Yeah. So you do have indigenous black people that live in the Philippines? The Philippines.

[Andrew Santino]

Were you. Are you friends with any of the indigenous people growing up? No. Why not?

[Bobby Lee]

Why not?

[Rudy]

They live in other islands.

[Bobby Lee]

They live in the other islands, right?

[Rudy]

South Central.

[Andrew Santino]

Southwest.

[Bobby Lee]

Southwest. Yeah. Yeah. Southeast.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Southeast Central.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Southeast.

[Andrew Santino]

Far Southeast Central.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Is there. Do they have gangs?

[Rudy]

Gangs?

[Bobby Lee]

There's no like. You know, it's like a tribe. All right.

[Rudy]

We do have gangs though.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. What. What are the gang names? The Philippines. Do you have gang names?

[Andrew Santino]

It's Flip Flop Boys.

[Bobby Lee]

The Flip Flop.

[Andrew Santino]

The Flip Flop Boys. The Flip Flop Boys. They're up to no good.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. They're up to no good. The Flip Flop Flip Boys are Bad boys. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

What are the name of the gangs?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Sig Sig. Sputnik.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. Sputnik. Yeah. That's insane.

[Andrew Santino]

One of the largest and most well known syndicates in the country. Oh my God. Bala Na Gang.

[Bobby Lee]

You know? Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Bahala na.

[Bobby Lee]

Bahala na. I'm a part of the War gang. I don't know if you know that.

[Andrew Santino]

Halalami.

[Rudy]

It's like a specific group.

[Andrew Santino]

We're going to get in trouble with. The Wari Wor Gang, pal.

[Bobby Lee]

Just a note. Worry Worry Gang. We're just joking.

[Andrew Santino]

We're just joking.

[Bobby Lee]

You want to. With that guy? Is that. Is that War Gang member? What A bahala. That's a bahala.

[Andrew Santino]

No, we like them. We're good with all of them.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, we're good with all. Let's go. Kurong. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Did you like that? Did I sound close?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah,

[Andrew Santino]

Go back. Go back to. To the names.

[Bobby Lee]

Go back to the name.

[Andrew Santino]

All right, there we. The last one is.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Vigilante group in the 80s.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, they're gone.

[Andrew Santino]

Do you guys.

[Bobby Lee]

What's wrong?

[Rudy]

Nothing. I'm listening.

[Bobby Lee]

All right. Do you know any gang members in the Philippines?

[Rudy]

No, but I remember in the village that we used to live.

[Bobby Lee]

Yes.

[Rudy]

There's. There was this a group of guys and say, oh, we're like, we're getting. We're gang members, so you have to do the. What is it the initiative?

[Bobby Lee]

Let me guess, Let me guess. Yeah, let me guess. Let me guess.

[Andrew Santino]

What's the initiation of the game? Hey.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, what's the initiation? You have to.

[Rudy]

No, we will go to the forest.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Slow down.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay, okay. What's going on?

[Bobby Lee]

What's going in the forest? Is it. Is that where the niguritos are? It sounds scary.

[Andrew Santino]

No, we go to the negrito forest. What's going on?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, what's going on there?

[Andrew Santino]

What are you doing in the.

[Bobby Lee]

For? Yeah, what are you doing?

[Rudy]

Have, like, dead frogs, and they would, like, eat this.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, you have to eat a dead frog.

[Bobby Lee]

Eat a dead frog. That doesn't sound that bad of an initiation. Yeah.

[Rudy]

Are they psychedelic frogs and after you get a spanking.

[Bobby Lee]

Not tough games.

[Andrew Santino]

They spank you. They spank you with a paddle.

[Rudy]

No, I, I, I said no to the spanking.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. Oh, you can say no.

[Andrew Santino]

You can say no to the game.

[Bobby Lee]

I'll eat the frog. No spanking.

[Andrew Santino]

You can just say no to a gag.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Sopranos.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Tony's like, you're gonna pay us what you owe us.

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

The guy's like, I don't want to, like, okay, what can we do?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, what can we do? So you said. But did you eat the frog?

[Rudy]

I just, like, licked it.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, you looked. Is it psychedelic? No, it must be psychedelic.

[Andrew Santino]

Gross for just, like, a nasty pond.

[Rudy]

How do you find, like, dead frog?

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, it's a dead frog.

[Andrew Santino]

Have you done that?

[Rudy]

No.

[Bobby Lee]

No.

[Andrew Santino]

So wait, that's too young. When you say initiation, that means you'd be in the gang once you did it. So did you get in the gang then? Oh, you had to let him spank you to get in the gang?

[Rudy]

It's not a real game. Yeah, I think it's.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, it's a fake game.

[Rudy]

They were like, oh, like, we're real. We're real. Like, we're Bloods.

[Bobby Lee]

There's Bloods out there. Is that what you're saying?

[Andrew Santino]

There's certainly not.

[Bobby Lee]

They're certainly not.

[Rudy]

That's what they said.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

They were lying. Just a spanking. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

We are the Frog Bloods.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

They are active Blood gang members in the operating sets in the Philippines.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, we're wrong. Okay. Yeah. We're learning. Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, in sau.

[Bobby Lee]

In Sau. Wow. The True Brown Style.

[Andrew Santino]

The name of the tbs. True Brown style.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Wow. True Brown Style. Yeah. So have you run into true TBs

[Andrew Santino]

and we should say something to the gangs Philippines.

[Bobby Lee]

We're.

[Andrew Santino]

We love you guys.

[Bobby Lee]

We're in the middle.

[Andrew Santino]

We are big fans.

[Bobby Lee]

We're corrupt cops.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, we're corrupt.

[Bobby Lee]

Like if we were cops and we would do dealings with you, let you go. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Bobby, be careful. We don't want these guys to get mad at us.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, I've been to Cebu many times, you know, I've never run into a tbs.

[Andrew Santino]

I haven't been spanking years.

[Rudy]

You're in the bougie parts.

[Andrew Santino]

That's right, girl. Say it, girl.

[Rudy]

Wait, you're never.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

[Rudy]

Well, he went to Marigundon.

[Bobby Lee]

I went to Marigundon. Okay. I went for a swim. I went to a swimming market.

[Andrew Santino]

Many gun down. Is that what it's called?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. So Marigandon. I went and what did I do in Marigandan?

[Rudy]

Tell them you recorded the podcast.

[Bobby Lee]

No. What about the goat and the feeding the children?

[Rudy]

That's not.

[Bobby Lee]

What is that?

[Rudy]

That's another area.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, but you're not going to give me props for that.

[Andrew Santino]

You fed goats to children?

[Bobby Lee]

No, no, no. I bought a bunch of spaghetti.

[Rudy]

Yeah. Spaghetti. Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

What like spaghetti noodles?

[Bobby Lee]

Hey, spaghetti. Yeah, yeah. That kind of spaghetti.

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

And I bought a bunch of spaghetti and there was also bread and some. A little salad. And went to a village. Right. Everyone was naked.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Coming out of the village. You know what I mean? A little bit. There was a goat tied to a. Right.

[Andrew Santino]

There's always a goat tied up. Yeah, yeah, yeah, always.

[Bobby Lee]

I just said it again. Different than a five.

[Andrew Santino]

Yep.

[Bobby Lee]

And I. We had a truck.

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

A van. And I fed the villagers boxes of spaghetti.

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

That's great. And that story is in the memoir it was signing yesterday. That's in the book.

[Andrew Santino]

Is that the author, Bobby Lee, feeding us spaghetti?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You just gave out.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, I want to try hard.

[Andrew Santino]

Spaghetti.

[Rudy]

No, it's already cooked.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, Cooked spaghetti.

[Bobby Lee]

I didn't give dry noodles. Like, hey, you have boiling water. Wait, you gotta make your own pasta sauce. Cooked spaghetti told the story really bad. Like he gave meal kits to people. Yeah, meal kits. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I wish it was the other way. Just handfuls into their hands.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Spaghetti. Spaghetti.

[Bobby Lee]

And they were. They seemed to be very happy about it.

[Andrew Santino]

You did charity.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. So a little bit. And then. And then I did my talent show out there, which is fun. Yeah. So I've done some stuff over there. Never rented any TBs or.

[Andrew Santino]

And you never want to.

[Bobby Lee]

You never want to.

[Andrew Santino]

We respect and love the tbs. Do you have motorcycle gangs?

[Rudy]

No.

[Andrew Santino]

Do people have motorcycles out there?

[Rudy]

Yeah, it's all motorcycles.

[Andrew Santino]

It's almost moped. No, those are mopeds. I mean motorcycles.

[Rudy]

Yeah, I think so.

[Bobby Lee]

What's the difference between a moped and a motorcycle?

[Andrew Santino]

A lot of ccs. Yeah, it's a much bigger engine.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, because of the conflict that we're in right now. I mean Philippines was the hardest hit really in the beginning of this conflict in terms of gas and.

[Andrew Santino]

So what should we do about it? Can we do something? What are we supposed to do? There's nothing we can do other than house Filipinos.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, that's what I do. I do what I can.

[Andrew Santino]

You did what you.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. Spaghetti and everything.

[Andrew Santino]

Spaghetti, yeah, yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Week old meat. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Black pools.

[Andrew Santino]

Blackpool.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I do everything I can.

[Andrew Santino]

Negrito pools. Okay, give me what's going on in your lives, Rudy. What are you doing?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Rudy]

Babysitting.

[Andrew Santino]

That's all you're doing all the time. That's your full time job now.

[Bobby Lee]

American dream.

[Rudy]

Yeah, we went camping.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Rudy]

Where we tried to invite you to

[Bobby Lee]

Bobby, but no, no, you never invited me.

[Andrew Santino]

We got Joshua, Trigger something.

[Rudy]

Leo Coro.

[Andrew Santino]

Leo Coro. That sound like home, huh?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

When we went, we. We went camping up Lake Kachuma.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, I love Lake Kachuma.

[Andrew Santino]

And the dog. I was like, oh, wow. She can. She's like restricted. She doesn't have to. We don't have to worry about leash or anything. Why there's, it's like fenced off where we were. And I'm thinking, oh, this is great. She jumps into a, like a brier patch and has burrs all over. I spent, spent like three hours picking out. Out of her phone. I felt so bad crying. It sucked. And then I was bummed because we didn't get the tent set up. And I was like, this is. We should just go.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh my God, you must snapped.

[Andrew Santino]

I did. I was.

[Bobby Lee]

So I told you about my cousin Andy and I what my. My parents did.

[Andrew Santino]

Huh?

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, equal camping. This is what my dad said. And we're like my cousin Andy and you know me and also Andy's father, my uncle.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

And so we set up a tent, right? We went to sleep. Sleep. And when we woke up, they were not there.

[Andrew Santino]

Andy and his dad.

[Bobby Lee]

My dad and my uncle were not there. They went to a hotel.

[Andrew Santino]

That sounds right.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. And they drove back and they would sleep good. They're like, you left us here.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

You would do that.

[Andrew Santino]

It's camping. You gotta Learn. That's it. What? I know.

[Bobby Lee]

But I'm 12.

[Andrew Santino]

You gotta. You gotta survive.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay? Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

Gotta survive.

[Bobby Lee]

All right, all right. But let's go back to camping. I. I will never camp, ever.

[Rudy]

Why not, though?

[Andrew Santino]

I don't like it.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't like it.

[Andrew Santino]

I like every. I like fishing and I like all that other stuff around it, but I don't want to sleep there. I'll go sleep somewhere else.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, because we have buildings now. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Buildings are great.

[Andrew Santino]

Also, the ground is very uncomfortable. I don't care how comfortable you are.

[Rudy]

You have a bed, though. Like a padding thing.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, you guys do glamping? No, you don't have padding when you do that.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, you.

[Andrew Santino]

You could do, like an insert into a sleeping bag, but it's not. That's not much.

[Rudy]

We did not do glamping.

[Andrew Santino]

No, you did. Sleeping bag with an insert, so it's more padded. Oh, not on a cot.

[Rudy]

No.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, but the ground's not that comfortable.

[Bobby Lee]

But you didn't sleep well, because when you came home, you slept all day. So what happened?

[Rudy]

Because I couldn't see. Because I thought we would just die.

[Bobby Lee]

That's exactly true.

[Andrew Santino]

True, true.

[Bobby Lee]

You don't camp.

[Andrew Santino]

Did you guys cook? Did you guys do grilling and stuff?

[Bobby Lee]

Did you hear scary things outside of the tent?

[Rudy]

There was a guy screaming at his wife, like, at 4:00am all right, what was he saying?

[Bobby Lee]

What was he saying?

[Andrew Santino]

First of all, I wasn't yelling at her. I was talking to her. He was screaming at his wife.

[Rudy]

Yeah, he was like, you stupid. Yeah, dumbass. Like, why are you doing that?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Rudy]

Whoa.

[Andrew Santino]

Now that is scary.

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

What's gonna happen?

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

He's screaming at her four in the morning.

[Bobby Lee]

Morning.

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Did anybody say shut up?

[Rudy]

No.

[Andrew Santino]

How far away were the campsites from each other?

[Rudy]

Pretty close.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, yeah. See, that's not. Also not.

[Bobby Lee]

That's not camping either.

[Andrew Santino]

You got to be.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, camping.

[Andrew Santino]

You got to be way out.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. You gotta hike.

[Rudy]

You gotta do, like, a pepper spray. I didn't have a knife, so you have to go.

[Andrew Santino]

You didn't have a knife. Strange.

[Bobby Lee]

You have to do what Ivanka and Jared did. They went to that island. All right. Took their shoes, went swimming. Yeah, they swam to an island.

[Andrew Santino]

That's right.

[Bobby Lee]

Barefoot.

[Andrew Santino]

That's right.

[Bobby Lee]

They hiked up top of the mountain. And then they bought it. They bought it.

[Andrew Santino]

Right?

[Bobby Lee]

That's real camping.

[Andrew Santino]

That's real camping. And that's what you guys go to

[Bobby Lee]

Albania, buy a mountain. Yeah. That's a real. Yeah, that's real camping.

[Andrew Santino]

So it's not. How did you know?

[Bobby Lee]

And to build a resort, you.

[Andrew Santino]

Did you build a fire pit? You didn't build a fire pit and you didn't grill or anything?

[Rudy]

There was no light. There was no light.

[Andrew Santino]

What did you do for food?

[Rudy]

We. Sandwiches. Sandwiches and mustard.

[Andrew Santino]

You brought sandwiches and mustard?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

What do you mean? What kind of sandwiches is.

[Rudy]

It was just. Just bread. Just bread, lettuce, ham, cheese and mustard.

[Bobby Lee]

Prison food. Yeah, prison food.

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I like a ham and cheese.

[Rudy]

Making it in the dark. Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

That sounds like the worst time ever.

[Andrew Santino]

You didn't just. You didn't have a flashlight.

[Rudy]

No, our phones, but then that was our phone and then we didn't have data. So at 10am we were just like, what are we gonna do?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, exactly.

[Andrew Santino]

What?

[Bobby Lee]

You know, it's like those cave people that go, what do they plunge it? What do they call them? Spelunking.

[Andrew Santino]

Spelunk.

[Bobby Lee]

Spelunking.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

And they get stuck in a crack like this. Right? And they get stuck and they're like, I think I'm gonna die. Right. But it's like you chose to be there.

[Andrew Santino]

You did this, you spelunked.

[Bobby Lee]

You know, I've never been in a cave stuck in a crack.

[Andrew Santino]

Never.

[Bobby Lee]

Have you ever been it?

[Andrew Santino]

I'm thinking about it.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm.

[Bobby Lee]

What about that one dude, that movie with his Alan?

[Andrew Santino]

Seven hours. What, 127.

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

And he had to cut his own arm off. I've just never been in that situation before. Do you know why I don't go out there?

[Andrew Santino]

You don't do that.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. When people are coming back like. You know what I mean? What happened to your arm? Shark attack. Well, that's. Never will happen to me.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, you do go in the ocean.

[Bobby Lee]

I know, but I. Tiger sharks. Yes.

[Rudy]

Yeah, yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

But in South Africa. No.

[Andrew Santino]

Not going to go Africa.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, I've been in there.

[Rudy]

Shark.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh,

[Andrew Santino]

you're fogged up again, huh?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Big fog guy, you know, it's a good episode if he's fogging.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Oh, my God.

[Andrew Santino]

So no camping anymore.

[Rudy]

No more camping.

[Andrew Santino]

All right.

[Bobby Lee]

Never again.

[Andrew Santino]

Never.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

I think it's a good idea.

[Bobby Lee]

I think that's a really good.

[Andrew Santino]

You don't need to camp.

[Bobby Lee]

You don't need to camp.

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't know. You're comfortable where you are. You're living in his house, living a good life.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I. Oh, I'll tell you what I was gonna see. And I'm glad I bailed. I bailed on Scary Move movie. My buddy told me. He was like, it's. It didn't. It didn't do it. Which sucks, is I loved the first ones.

[Bobby Lee]

I can do it.

[Rudy]

I just.

[Andrew Santino]

But the original was so funny. You know why? It was a moment in time.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I think it was just a great moment in time.

[Rudy]

Wow.

[Bobby Lee]

Wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow. More money. Money, money, money, money, money.

[Andrew Santino]

I'll say this. This might be the last time that we see you on the show for a little while.

[Bobby Lee]

So probably year, year and a half.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. We'll miss you.

[Bobby Lee]

You. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And go have fun back at home. You'll be back. Yeah, maybe. We'll see. It's.

[Bobby Lee]

It's funny. She's like, I can't wait to go home. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You miss the Philippines? Like crazy.

[Bobby Lee]

Well. And I can't meet my. My. My friends and this and that.

[Rudy]

And then attitude to Tito Bobby a lot.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, she's feel that. She's been doing attitude too.

[Bobby Lee]

Your attitudes. I mean, why, why though?

[Rudy]

No, because like, the last time he was like, I went on a date and he was like, I wanna. I wanna meet this guy. I'm. I'm gonna. I'm gonna. Gonna go to his profile. I'm gonna message him. I'm like, what?

[Bobby Lee]

And we're gonna miss you.

[Andrew Santino]

We are gonna miss you.

[Bobby Lee]

And I. And I also believe that you're gonna miss being here.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, I don't. That part I don't believe.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. I don't know.

[Andrew Santino]

I think you'll be. You'll miss some parts of the States. You'll miss Rudy.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Rudy]

You'll miss to be in the Philippines.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, she prefers it. Would you want to go back? Yeah. You want to stay here? Yeah. You're American.

[Andrew Santino]

You are.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Rudy]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

But I mean. Good luck.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Good luck.

[Andrew Santino]

We hope you come back.

[Bobby Lee]

We hope you come back. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Say thank you for being a bad friend. Great.

[Rudy]

Death.

[Bobby Lee]

Queen Carvania stood haloed by the morning sun. An army hung on her every word.

[Andrew Santino]

My champions, I have sold my chariot on Carvana.

[Bobby Lee]

Carvana.

[Andrew Santino]

Twas a lovely suv. An inexplicably queenly offer. They're even coming to the castle to collect it. Tonight we feast. An offer you can feast on. Sell your car today on Carvana. Pick up these. May apply.