Bobby's Car Crash

Summary

Bad Friends Podcast: "Comedy Store Snitch" (July 20, 2026)

Hosts: Andrew Santino and Bobby Lee
Featured Guests/Regulars: Doc (William), Carlos (“Fancy”), Rick Ingram, Joe (Comedy Store manager)

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Episode Overview

This episode blends the classic, rapid-fire banter of Andrew and Bobby with more introspective bits about honesty, mental health, and the stranger elements of life as a working comic. The opening centerpiece is Bobby Lee’s accidental fender-bender in the Comedy Store parking lot, which spirals into a hunt for the “snitch” who turned him in. The gang also dives deep on DNA surprises, intermittent fasting, mental health, and a playful debate over who can last longest in a group fast.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

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1. Bobby's Comedy Store Hit-and-Run

[02:01–11:14]

• Incident: Bobby accidentally hit Rick Ingram’s car in the Comedy Store lot, mistakenly thought he could get away with it, and was later caught on camera.
  • “For some reason thought it was in forward, but it was in reverse.” (Bobby, 02:19)
• Snitch Hunt: Bobby’s main concern wasn’t the car, but figuring out who “ratted” him out.
  • “And that guy, I’m going to find out.” (Bobby, 03:54)
• Confronting Rick: They call Rick on-air to reveal the car wasn’t badly damaged, someone even buffed out the dent, but multiple people witnessed the incident.
  • “There’s like eight or nine people who all witnessed this. Nobody says a word.” (Rick, 05:47)
• Joking About Reparations: Santino riffs that Bobby should buy Rick a new car.
  • “Start looking for a new car for your family.” (Andrew, 07:55)
• Manager’s Perspective: Joe, the Comedy Store manager, confirms everyone saw it, but can’t or won’t give up the name of the main snitch.
  • “There were probably a lot of people, because people came in and say, ‘yeah, it was Bobby.’” (Joe, 10:01)

Memorable Quotes

• “I saw the video...it’s the funniest thing I’ve ever seen in my life.” (Steph Tolev, via Bobby, 03:18)
• “The only thing you can do is: what are the damages, give me the price and I’ll pay it.” (Bobby, 10:52)

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2. Aging, Rounding Up and Down in Age

[01:15–01:57]

• Bobby and Andrew have a running bit on when you start "rounding up" your age and feeling your years.
  • “At 35, I was like, I’m almost 40.” (Andrew, 01:34)
  • “Yeah, I’m 60 years old.” (Bobby, 01:46)

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3. Fasting, Sardines, and Dietary Adventures

[11:07–15:33, 55:38–59:43]

• Bobby discusses completing a 24-hour fast and deep-diving into extreme dietary shifts: sardines, broccoli sprouts, bone broth, etc.
  • “I bought a thousand dollars worth of sardines from all over the world.” (Bobby, 12:11)
• Doc and Santino tease him about keto, blue zones, and the trendiness of it all.
  • “You look like a future nurse.” (Andrew, 11:36)
• Conversation pivots to “Celtic” vs. “Celtics” (Boston Celtics) sea salt, and other wellness trends.
  • “You don’t mean Himalayan sea salt?” (Andrew, 13:45)
• Bobby proposes a group fasting challenge, raising the stakes to a “Bad Fast” competition, leading to a lively debate about who would break first.
  • “I think you’ll give up.” (Bobby, 61:47)
  • “The sheer competitiveness in my body will make me beat you. I’ll die just to beat you.” (Andrew, 61:55)

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4. DNA Surprises & Ancestry Oddities

[25:20–34:47]

• Doc shares his 23andMe results: 77% Congolese, surprises about his extended family.
  • “I found out I got a sister...she was my cousin, now she’s my sister.” (Doc, 26:51)
  • “That’s crazy. So you’re a mixture of people.” (Bobby, 26:34)
• Explores unexpected family revelations, some comic confusion about genealogy, and privacy concerns from DNA leaks.
  • “23andMe data leak compromised a personal and genetic information of roughly 7 million people.” (Andrew, 31:33)
• Conversation about the detachment and revelation that come from doing ancestry tests.
  • “You might find out no one in your family’s your family—but would that even matter?” (Andrew, 28:44)

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5. Aliens, Disclosure, and Spielberg

[15:42–34:40]

• Bobby claims to have become a “believer” in aliens after seeing something he can’t describe.
  • “I fucking saw it, dude. And now I’m a believer, brother.” (Bobby, 15:51)
• Spirals into a riff on Spielberg’s “Disclosure Day” and speculation about which Hollywood elites might know “the truth,” including a joke about the Obamas.
  • “I mean, he’s close with the Obamas. You think the Obamas are aliens?” (Andrew, 18:05)
• Speculation about recurring alien themes in Spielberg’s films.
  • “Maybe his entire career he’s been layering it into us and we’re just blind.” (Andrew, 18:28)
• “Bigfoot’s part of it… Loch Ness Monster too?” (Bobby, 34:13)

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6. Mental Health, Depression, and Medication Real Talk

[45:00–52:04]

• Open discussion of therapy, medication hesitancy, bipolar diagnosis, and depression:
  • “I think you’re bipolar.” (Bobby, 45:00)
  • “I’ve always been in low level depression my whole life.” (Bobby, 47:55)
• Doc shares why he’s resisted medication, citing a lack of trust and side effect concerns.
  • “In order for you to be open to that, you have to be willing to say...or you have to be comfortable with who you’re dealing with.” (Doc, 46:35)
• Santino discusses his own struggles with depersonalization and what it felt like to “crack out” of it.
  • “You know what it feels like? It feels like...once you beat the boss [in a video game]... everything lines up...” (Andrew, 53:15)
• Comic relief interspersed to keep the often-heavy subject matter light.

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7. Nicknames, Black & White Naming Traditions, and Childhood

[36:04–39:34]

• Lively back-and-forth on why white and black communities use names and nicknames differently.
  • “White people will be like, William is Bill, Richard is Dick…and black people don’t do that.” (Andrew, 36:15)
  • “We get nicknames based on whatever your physical disability is.” (Doc, 38:30)
• Conversation about “Willy Boy,” playful mock-controversy on whether Bobby has the right to use the nickname.

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8. Inspiration, Disabilities & Social Media

[39:10–41:38]

• Doc and the crew riff about following comedians with disabilities as inspiration, positive mindset, and gratitude for physical health.
  • “I got to follow a lot of people with their handicaps…keeps me in check.” (Doc, 40:03)
• Shout-out to comedians “Trey Nubs” and Luis.

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9. Food as Comfort, Fast Food Rituals

[65:38–68:10]

• Playful recounting of favorite fast food orders, “trauma responses” to certain chains, and the emotional connection to food rewards.
  • “It’s a treat for myself before Bad Friends, so I don’t like…” (Carlos, 65:43)
  • “What do you get at In-N-Out?” (Andrew, 67:26)
• Doc explains his elaborate In-N-Out order (double-double, extra tomato, no onions, chilies on side) and admits, “Give me diarrhea every time!”

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “I’ve always been in low level depression my whole life.” (Bobby, 47:55)
• “Start looking for a new car for your family.” (Andrew, 07:55)
• “You know what it feels like? Once you beat the boss in a video game, everything lines up and you’re like, how did I not know how to do this?” (Andrew, 53:15)
• “I think he’s high into it. There’s themes in all his movies. He’s been trying to tell us for years.” (Bobby, on Spielberg, 16:17)
• “We get nicknames based on whatever your physical disability is.” (Doc, 38:30)
• “I can get erect, but I can’t climax.” (Bobby, 47:23)

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Important Timestamps

| Segment | Timestamp | |----------------------------------------------|---------------| | Comedy Store hit-and-run & snitching | 02:01–11:14 | | Fasting & sardine diet discussion | 11:07–15:33, 55:38–59:43 | | DNA surprises & ancestry results | 25:20–34:47 | | Alien/Disclosure Day/Spielberg speculation | 15:42–34:40 | | Nicknames & naming traditions | 36:04–39:34 | | Mental health & medication conversation | 45:00–52:04 | | Comedy disabilities & inspiration | 39:10–41:38 | | Group fasting challenge setup | 58:59–64:14 | | Fast food rituals and food therapy | 65:38–68:10 |

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Tone & Language

The episode is true to Bad Friends’ signature: fast-paced, irreverent, and endlessly self-deprecating—with beats that balance emotional honesty and hard-hitting punchlines. Even the more serious discussions are navigated with classic sarcasm and banter.

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Summary Highlights

• Bobby’s failed escape from a fender bender anchors the episode in signature chaos and guilt.
• Mental health, therapy, and the ongoing pursuit of happiness receive a rare, candid treatment, punctuated with jokes—never fully breaking the show’s comedic rhythm.
• A running "snitch hunt" and the bold group fasting challenge keep the competitive, brotherly energy alive.
• Revelations from DNA tests, failed diets, alleged aliens, and the meaning of legacy media ground the show in the peculiar reality of modern life and friendship.
• The crew’s ability to riff on disability, identity, and naming customs shows both their edge and their warmth in handling sensitive material.

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For First-Time Listeners

"Comedy Store Snitch" is a quintessential Bad Friends episode—jumping effortlessly from absurd personal confession to cultural commentary, always grounded in honest (often humiliating) self-reflection and rapid-fire joke battles. You’ll leave both laughing and thinking—especially about whether YOU could survive a ‘bad fast’ alongside these three.”

Transcript

[A]

Hey, what's up, Bad Friends? I am doing one more show here in the year before 2026 is done, and I don't go out until next year. I'm in St. Charles, which is St. Louis, Missouri, August 7th at the Ameristar Casino, St. Charles, St. Louis. Come out and see me in Missouri August 7th. Go to Andrew Santino.com for those tickets. Andrewsantino.com hey.

[B]

Hey. We have new merch.

[A]

Merch. Merch.

[B]

I got these shirts. This is my favorite shirt.

[A]

This is an artist that worked with us here on Bad Friends. He submitted, and we said we got to put that on a church. And this is incredible. You go to badfriends merch.com to buy this. Bad friends merch.com. go get it. It comes in black and red. Badfriends merch.com. you two are bad friends. Who are these two idiots?

[C]

White dude and an Asian dude.

[B]

You two are disgusting.

[C]

Oh, you two are something. We're bad friends.

[A]

Friends. So what's going on in.

[B]

We have ET And Clayface in the COVID booth right now.

[A]

Oh, he stands up now.

[B]

He stands up now. What's going on with your face? Can you get invisible acne patches, please?

[D]

I.

[B]

Why don't you. You look like an aerial. Aerial view of Iran. I mean, there's explosions.

[A]

It stumbled, but you still got through.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. They're just little stickers like every teenager uses.

[A]

Okay, you're 40.

[B]

I'm 39. Yeah, you're 40.

[A]

Okay. You're 40. 40.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That's the same thing.

[B]

This.

[A]

That's interesting. When do you start rounding up? In ages or down in ages? What. At what scale of your life do you go. You round up automatically versus when you start rounding down.

[B]

38.

[A]

38. You start rounding up.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

You have no. I think 35. At 35, I was like, I'm almost 40.

[B]

Yeah. And. You're 40.

[A]

You're 40.

[B]

Yeah, I know. It just feels weird. I'm 60.

[A]

That's.

[B]

Yeah, I'm 60.

[A]

The most. That's the most true thing he said to me.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. I'm 60 years old. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And.

[A]

And I'm.

[B]

You're 50? You're for sure 50.

[A]

I'm 50. Yeah. I look 50. I act 50. My body feels 50.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And guess what I did yesterday? Two things happened.

[A]

What happened?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Well, two things are going on. Well, first of all, I got. I got caught. I got caught.

[A]

Doing what?

[B]

I got caught, dude.

[D]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

What?

[C]

Getting hot sucks.

[B]

Yeah, getting caught sucks, dude.

[A]

What did you do?

[B]

I Thought I could get away with it is what I did.

[A]

What did you do, dude?

[B]

So I was at the Comedy Store Friday night and I took my car and I for some reason thought it was in forward, but it was in reverse.

[A]

And who'd you hit?

[B]

And I pressed the, you know, I mean, the gas.

[A]

Right, right, the pedal.

[B]

Yeah, the gas pedal.

[A]

That's right.

[B]

Like any 60 year old would do.

[A]

It does sound like an old guy.

[B]

And I crashed into a car.

[A]

Whose car?

[B]

Well, let me finish.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

I put it in forward and I just left.

[A]

And there was cameras.

[B]

Well, I didn't know that. So at around, so at around midnight, Joe, the Comedy Store manager goes, you got caught. And I go, what do you mean? And he goes, we have it on video.

[D]

We got it.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. And then Steph Tolaev texts me late at night. She goes, I saw it. And she goes, it's the funniest thing I've ever seen in my life.

[A]

It's her car.

[B]

No.

[A]

Whose car?

[B]

Ricky.

[A]

Rick Ingram.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[B]

I know. So then what I do is. And then here's the thing. The thing is, is that you thought you were going to get out here. But then Joe says something very interesting. He said, aside. So Steph saw, but she didn't rat me out. They just drove away. They said there, there was somebody that Joe walked up to and goes, did you see it? And the guy rat said my name and ratted me out. And I asked Joe for the name and he wouldn't give me the name. And that guy, I'm going to find out.

[A]

You don't know who it is?

[B]

I don't know who it is.

[A]

We're going to find out.

[B]

We're going to find out. And then I call Rick and I go, I guess I got caught. Hello?

[D]

Hello? Hey.

[A]

Hey. Dude, you're on Bad Friends.

[D]

Nice.

[A]

I have to.

[B]

Who's it? Who are you talking to?

[A]

Who do you think?

[B]

Rick or Joe?

[A]

The man's car that you hit. Okay, Rick, how much, how much damage is on the car?

[D]

I mean, at this point it doesn't look like almost any. It's like just a dent because we apparently have security guards who buff out bumpers on the.

[A]

Wait, someone fixed your car at the store?

[D]

Dude, I never even got to see the damage. I, I, I saw the video of it.

[B]

No, you asked for the video, though.

[A]

No, I like that.

[B]

I, I heard you asked for the video store.

[D]

What's that?

[B]

I, I heard that you asked, Let me see the video.

[D]

I said, yeah. I said, is there A video of this. And he said, yeah, we can pull that up. And it's. It's. It's fairly crazy.

[B]

Why is it crazy?

[A]

Why? What happened?

[D]

Because you just. Yeah, you hit the car pretty hard, and then. And then you just kind of pull forward and then back up, and then just like, reparations, and then he gets out and then. Driver's side or passenger side?

[B]

Passenger side. Because I was so close to your

[D]

car, I couldn't get out after hitting it very close. And then climbed out the pasture side door and then went inside. What I find amazing is, like, there's like eight or nine people who all witnessed this.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

Nobody says a word.

[A]

Nice.

[B]

Yeah. Except for one person. I'm gonna find that person out. There was one person that said it was Bobby Lee, but I. I saw. I know that eight witnesses shut their mouth. And those aren't rats.

[D]

Well, no, they are rats, because as soon as they saw me, they were like, bobby Lee hit your car.

[B]

No, seriously, how many people?

[D]

I mean, five or six people immediately with Steph.

[B]

Toll of.

[A]

One of them was Steph. Tell the one.

[D]

No, she didn't tell me.

[B]

Exactly. She's not a rat.

[D]

She. Yeah, these are, like, people who work there.

[B]

Yeah. I'm gonna get a list. I'm gonna call Joe.

[D]

They're all so scared.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Say something. They don't want to offend. You know, the famous person who talks to them sometimes,

[A]

obviously they're not that scared because they.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

They.

[C]

They risked it, all right?

[D]

They saw me, and then they were like, wait. He might actually, one at a time, eliminate each of us from this planet.

[A]

You do have a little school shooter vibes a little bit.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Well, then I texted. What? I. I texted you. I texted you. How much does it would do you need? I'll Venmo you whatever you need. I'll take care.

[D]

And you said, no, yeah, I don't need anything. I mean, my car already sucks.

[B]

No, it's a nice car.

[A]

Let's get a new car. Because of Bobby. Let him get you a new car. I would say.

[B]

No, no, no, no. He said we were cool.

[A]

I would say that's insane. And the fans of this show would agree. I think you should buy him a new car. Yeah, I think it's the right move, because what happens when you hit. When you hit someone's car? One little nudge. What year is it, man?

[D]

This thing's a classic. A 2013 Toyota Camry.

[A]

Thirteen Camrys. Yeah. You can look this up. They had a problem with the chassis at the midpoint, where if any slight ding or accident could render the car totaled, you could look it up.

[D]

Exactly. This is why I didn't want to take it in, because. Yeah, that's the last thing I need.

[A]

They'll total it. Right.

[B]

So I'll make it up to you, though.

[A]

I think he. I think whatever. So, Rick, start looking for a new car for your family.

[D]

No, no, no, no.

[B]

Rick, Rick, I will make you in a different way.

[A]

I think you should give him a new vehicle.

[B]

Okay, well, we'll talk about it with Rick personally. Him and I, we're doing everything. I think my. I think what I'm going to give him is going to be better than a vehicle, a spaceship.

[D]

I. I can't wait for all of the rewards.

[B]

Yeah, you're gonna get so many rewards, dude. You'll see. You're gonna get rewarded, you know? I mean, more than Chris Rock gave you. More than Chris Rock gave you.

[A]

All right, buddy.

[B]

All right, buddy.

[A]

Thank you, Rick. I'll talk to you later, dude.

[B]

Yeah, all right, buddy.

[D]

Later.

[B]

Did follow Rick Ingram. Very funny comics.

[A]

I want to call one of, if not the, one of the funniest.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Working comedians here.

[B]

Yeah. Here we go. Joe, the manager at the Comedy Store.

[D]

Hey, dude.

[B]

Hey, Joe, it's Bobby. You're gonna. You're on Bad Friends, the. The kind of famous podcast.

[D]

What's it called?

[B]

Bad Friends.

[D]

Okay.

[B]

Okay. Have you heard of it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So you're on here with Santino, and I want to ask you, what did I do Friday night?

[D]

Okay. You want me to tell the truth?

[B]

Yes.

[D]

Okay. So you left the Comedy Store. You started to realize you got your phone.

[B]

Yes.

[D]

Came and got your phone.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

And you. You backed into Rick Ingram's car.

[B]

Yes.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

And it was.

[D]

So Everyone knew about it, but I think you.

[B]

No, I knew about it. When I hear a crash, I go, whoa.

[D]

Well, that's when you speak up.

[B]

But, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. You don't speak up.

[A]

That is when you speak up.

[B]

No, you don't speak up. You don't. You try to get away with it.

[D]

Now, Rick's car might be a dumpster, but it's. It's his car.

[B]

Yeah, I understand that. I understand that. Well, you saw the tape, and you. And now I, I, I. I've owned up to it.

[D]

Yes.

[B]

Okay, so what I need to know is who the rat is.

[D]

Okay. They're one of the security guys. And Rick just said, hey, I heard my car.

[B]

Rick. We just talked to Rick on the podcast. He said there were six people.

[A]

Yeah, there's a lot of.

[B]

Well, there were probably a lot of

[D]

people, because people came in and say, yeah, it was Bobby.

[B]

And I said, I want to know a list of people that went in and said it was me. I don't know that I could name

[D]

them all right now, but do you remember when I. When I closed your door? I didn't know that that had happened. I said it. That you hit his car. I said, no. I. I watched him drive away. I didn't know that. It already happened.

[B]

It had already happened. Yeah.

[D]

Can I say that Rick has not responded to my text saying, hey, here's why. What happened?

[B]

And Bobby's good about it, and he

[D]

has not even responded to me.

[A]

We just called him. Bobby agreed on the podcast to get him a new car.

[B]

No, I did not. I did not do that. I'm gonna give him other things.

[D]

No.

[A]

A car.

[B]

Yeah. Anyway, thank you, Joe. I would like a list of the people that ratted me out. That's all I want.

[D]

Okay. You got it.

[B]

Okay. Thank you. Yeah. So we love Joe. We love Joe.

[A]

You got caught.

[B]

I got caught.

[A]

What are you gonna do?

[B]

Nothing.

[A]

Nothing?

[B]

Yeah, nothing. Absolutely nothing.

[A]

What could you do?

[B]

Well, all I can do is, like, what are the damages? Give me the price and I'll pay it. Right?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

He said nah because he's hungry. Case closed.

[A]

Now reopen it.

[B]

No, no, no, no, no. Straight to her moves. Keep it closed.

[A]

No, open it up.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

Please open it.

[B]

All right, so that's the first thing. Okay. The second thing is I did a 24 fast yesterday. 24 hour.

[A]

I mean, you didn't eat for a whole day.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Why are you doing that? Are you trying to get into fasting? So you're on GLP1s and you're fasting?

[B]

I know. I. I quit the G appeal ones. Ah, there he is. My guy. Dude, what's up, man? How are you, dude? There he is, dude. Yeah. He looks like a future nurse.

[A]

I love him.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah, I love him, too. Look at him, Doc.

[A]

Always stand.

[B]

Always. Good. Good style. Simple, basic, clean, white gray. Yeah, White gray. Yeah. What's up, man?

[C]

How you feeling, though?

[B]

Yeah, I'm pretty good, dude.

[A]

Doc is back. Doc is. Doc is wearing what all Filipino nurses wear.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

On their downtime.

[C]

Yeah. That's how I do it. You know, I like to come, you

[A]

know, you do look sharp. The shoes. The shoes are nice. Yeah, I like the shoes.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Oh, appreciate it.

[B]

I love your Harry Potter glasses, Doc. I just finished a 24 hour fast. Yeah, it was hard.

[C]

Very different.

[B]

And then what I've been doing now is I bought a thousand dollars worth of sardines from all over the world.

[C]

Oh, you doing the. Oh, wow.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. Sardines, broccoli, sprouts, bone broth, blueberries.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

No, am I doing the right thing?

[C]

Yeah, so, yeah, yeah, definitely. Recipe for diarrhea, but.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, but they say that this is the way.

[A]

Is this. Is this from the blue zones? Is that what you're doing? You're doing the diet from the blue zones?

[B]

No, I've been just. My Tik Tok algorithm is just saying.

[C]

I thought you was going on a keto diet with the. To Only.

[B]

What's a keto?

[A]

It's close to keto.

[B]

Yeah, but.

[C]

Well, he mentioned all that other stuff.

[B]

Yeah. So I've been e. Yeah, keto.

[A]

Keto is fats and oils, proteins, veggies, dairy, nuts, seeds and fruits.

[B]

Yeah. A lot of walnuts.

[C]

So the 24 hours you went without water and.

[B]

No, I did water with a little bit of Celtic sea salt.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

To get Celtic. Celtic. Oh, that's the name.

[B]

Yeah, Celtic.

[A]

The Boston Celtics.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. It's why we don't call them the Boston Celtic Celtics.

[A]

Then they probably are. Okay, well, then we've just mispronounced it.

[B]

All right, well, you know the Boston Celtics. All right, so. But it's Celtic.

[A]

No, it's. It's Celtic salt.

[B]

Celtics.

[A]

Austin. Celtics.

[B]

Okay, that's true.

[C]

So was you taking a Celtic salt because in your mind you believe it's more healthier?

[B]

No. Yeah. Well, there's also something called Baja Gold. Oh, yeah, the salt.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Put a little bit in there with water.

[A]

What about lemon?

[B]

No, I didn't do any lemon. So.

[A]

You mean Himalayan sea salt?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Himalayan is good, too. That's the third grade.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Okay. So that's what I did. All that drank water.

[C]

Third World country when it comes to salts. That's the information.

[D]

Okay.

[B]

All right, so what do you think of this? All right, just sardines, right? Bone broth. Right. Some veggies, like broccoli sprouts, spinach, stuff like that for fiber.

[A]

And then a breakfast burrito the next day.

[B]

No, no, no, no.

[C]

This is.

[B]

I. Dude, this morning I opened up a can of the worst sardines. They taste so awful.

[A]

They're all bad.

[B]

Yeah. And I poured it on a plate and I ate every little with the bones and everything.

[C]

Water. Why water or oil?

[B]

Did you have olive oil?

[C]

Oh, olive oil. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah, that's Game, right? Yeah, we're all game on. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So what are you looking to do? I don't know.

[C]

Yeah, this is like a. I don't know where the you going with this? Because it went from fasting, but you're still eating healthy regardless, So I did

[B]

24 hours and the next meal I had was What I just told you.

[A]

Did you feel good after?

[B]

I felt great. I went to sleep.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Waited two hours.

[D]

Right.

[B]

This morning I had a can of sardines. The best kind.

[A]

That's all you've had is sardines and coffee?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Your toilet's gonna break.

[C]

What do you mean?

[A]

That's. Sardines and coffee is going to run through you like a river.

[B]

Yeah. And I got some, like, really fancy Greek yogurt tonight. I'm gonna do a little smoothie with blueberries.

[A]

Who did this?

[B]

Who? Who did you.

[A]

Who got you into this?

[B]

I did.

[A]

You're.

[B]

What do you. I went on tick tock. My algorithms kept saying, you know, and I was like, oh, I'm gonna do this. And now I'm obsessed with it. And I've looked up every best sardine in the world, canned salmon, and this is what I'm doing for the next week.

[C]

Well, you know why he's doing the yogurt? Because he's getting the.

[A]

He needs the. He needs the probiotics.

[B]

I need a probiobiotic and kimchi and sauerkraut as well.

[A]

I've ordered love sour.

[C]

Yeah, you own it.

[B]

Yeah, I'm on it. And guess what, dude, I'll tell you another thing that I'm on, dude.

[C]

What you got?

[B]

I'm a believer, dude.

[A]

Oh, yeah, we're on.

[B]

I'm. I believe what you believe about because I saw it.

[C]

What did you see?

[B]

You know what I saw. Look at me right now. I'm gonna do. I saw. Look at my hand, dude. I fucking saw it, dude.

[A]

Disclosure day.

[C]

Exactly.

[B]

Oh, you saw. I fucking saw it, dude. And now I'm a believer, brother.

[C]

Hold on. Fuck you.

[B]

I'm a believer, dude.

[C]

Bobby.

[B]

So goddamn Holly, it took disclosure. Yeah.

[C]

Disco.

[B]

He knows, dude. Yeah, he's a religion.

[C]

Well, he's. He's high into it.

[B]

He's high into it. And also, there's themes in all of his movies. He's been trying to tell us for years. Dude. Yeah, you. I mean, disclose your day, dude.

[A]

Look, what's the day?

[C]

It's just so uncomfortable.

[B]

We don't know when you. This. You know what this means, dude? Yeah, that's the alien Artifact. It's a alien. You see a movie? Yeah, yeah.

[C]

What is that?

[D]

Recognize.

[B]

He grabs an alien artifact and he does this dude in disclosure day, dude.

[C]

Spoiler alert. Godamn.

[B]

That's in the trailer, dude. It's in the trailer, dude.

[C]

Watch the trailer.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

I didn't watch.

[B]

I saw it.

[A]

I'm not interested.

[D]

What?

[A]

I'm not interested.

[B]

It's not a good movie.

[C]

You shouldn't be.

[D]

Oh really?

[B]

Did you like it?

[A]

I heard it wasn't good.

[B]

I think the filmmaking is amazing. Filmmaking is superb.

[A]

Look at him sucking Spielberg's dick.

[B]

Music superb. But when I walked out of it, I went what?

[C]

He's a film school buff. That's what he gonna do.

[B]

That's what he gonna do.

[A]

But it's phony cuz you know. You know it's not a good movie.

[B]

That's what he gonna do. It's a boomer movie. You know, it's a boomer movie.

[A]

Oh, I should go.

[B]

Dan X Boomer.

[A]

I should go.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

We're boomers. Wait, give me box office mojo. 160 million. That's real bad. They thought that was going to make a shitload.

[B]

I think it's good.

[A]

Click on the Box Office Mojo logo. Take it back to the homepage real

[C]

fast to see what the.

[A]

I just want to see. Zoom in. I just want to see now what obsession is at. Click on it. 3:33. Oh my God. And by the time this pod comes out, it'll be 400.

[B]

Yeah, right.

[A]

That's mind.

[B]

It's mind blowing because disclosure date cost 200 million to make.

[A]

They're never going to make their money back. 200 million was the budget. Then they marketing and everything. They're probably. They're going to be in the hole

[C]

because you got somebody from the outside in trying to.

[B]

No, inside out.

[A]

No such.

[B]

Yeah, inside out, dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think Spielberg knows something.

[A]

You do?

[B]

Oh yeah. Spielberg knows something.

[C]

I would give him that.

[B]

You give him that?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I mean you have to think that he's close with the Obamas. Yeah, I mean he's been there.

[A]

You think the Obamas are aliens?

[B]

I don't know. He looked at the files.

[A]

What files?

[B]

You know, the extraterrestrial files, dude. No, but I, I do. It did give me something where I think that he knows something Spielberg does. Yeah. And I think that like maybe there is.

[A]

Give me a list of Spielberg films from top to bottom and then we can see if there's maybe a pattern or a puzzle that he wants us to figure Out. Do you know what I mean? Maybe his entire career he's been layering it into us and we're just blind. And now you finally.

[B]

You don't have to. I can tell you what they are.

[A]

You don't know all of them.

[B]

I know all of the alien ones.

[A]

Most encounters the third kind.

[B]

So I'm going to talk about that.

[A]

E.T.

[B]

e.T. Yes.

[A]

Poltergeist.

[B]

That's not. That's not an alien. No.

[C]

E.T. does look like the fake mummy that they say is fake.

[B]

From Mexico.

[C]

From Peru.

[B]

Peru.

[A]

I mean, these are all alien.

[B]

Same thing. All right. And then we got the Color Purple.

[A]

That's an alien film.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

I don't know how.

[B]

Yeah, well, if that's the case, then I'm so too, 100%. Yeah, go. Go down. Keep going down.

[A]

AI Schindler's List.

[B]

Minority Port is a no. That's not Alien.

[A]

No.

[B]

War of the Worlds for sure.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

What do we got then? He did a bunch of stuff that's in disclosure day.

[C]

Well, he also has the Encounters.

[A]

Close Encounters, the Third Kind.

[C]

No, no, no, no, no. He has Encounters on Netflix. Documentary on Netflix.

[B]

Oh, wow.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

That's where he first revealed. That's what was first revealed. The prayer Mana. Species.

[B]

That's a. Yeah. So at any time I can go and speak an alien language and you'll be able to understand it, because some people do.

[C]

Well, either that or you're talking to somebo.

[B]

This guy could be either one.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

You might be seeing this guy.

[C]

Bobby up.

[B]

No, no, this. That. No, that was in the movie you start.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, I know.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, that was in the movie. I'm just doing the movie. I'm not doing African style.

[C]

Right, right. But that's. But even when. When I saw that, I did remember that part and I was like, it's kind of racist, but I'm.

[B]

Hold on to it.

[C]

Maybe.

[A]

Maybe you called my name.

[B]

Sorry.

[A]

Bantu.

[B]

Bantu.

[A]

Bantu. Does it. Zulu and Zocha.

[B]

Yeah. Do you know what tribe you're. You're from or.

[C]

No, I'm from. No, no, that's a good question.

[B]

That's a good question. Dude, can we go to hereditary.com or police people?

[C]

77 Congolese. Yeah. Somewhere around there.

[B]

You're 70? 77.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Condolees.

[C]

Yeah. And 18 white.

[B]

Well, I'm 10 Japanese.

[C]

You are?

[B]

Yeah. So I think there were some. Yeah, yeah. What.

[C]

What

[B]

they call it? No.

[C]

Cd.

[B]

Oh, my God. I have ocd.

[A]

Well, I do, too. And have you ever had a thought that just won't leave you alone, you know, like something weird or dark or completely, like, unfounded. It's out of character. It's out of nowhere. And your brain is just, like, hitting you in the head with it for some reason. And you try to feel better, and you don't know how to get rid of it. Well, that's because you got ocd. Okay.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

You know, and ocd, it seems like the stereotypes they say, people being organized, that's completely wrong. Okay. I'm telling you. Sometimes you get these persistent thoughts, right, Bob?

[B]

Yeah. Unwanted, intrusive, distressing thoughts that often get stuck in your mind. They tend to latch onto things you care about most, which can bring up a lot of guilt and shame.

[A]

It really does. Then you feel driven to certain behaviors. Try to make those thoughts stop or change, even though that might not be possible. But OCD is one of the most treatable mental health conditions out there if you get the right kind of specialized therapy. And OCD needs erp, or exposure and response prevention, which is proven to be the most effective treatment.

[B]

And that's why I want to tell you guys about no cd, because this is something they can help with.

[A]

It's the world leading treatment provider for OCD. All of their licensed therapists specialize in ERP therapy, exposure and response prevention. And therapy with no CD is 100 virtual and covered by insurance for over 138 million Americans.

[B]

A lot of Americans.

[A]

You got to get it. To learn more about starting OCD therapy with no CD, go to nocd.com friends and book a free call with their team.

[B]

That's nocd.com friends Mars Man. I'm getting old, guys. And my testosterone, they died.

[A]

The testosterone.

[B]

I had a testosterone funeral for all my testosterone. And I'll tell you this. Mars Men, they're alive again.

[A]

Here we go. They're bouncing back with natural testosterone support with Mars Men. They've got such crazy, funny ingredients, but they're so good for you.

[B]

They're not funny.

[A]

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[B]

Give me one. Give me one.

[A]

Go ahead.

[B]

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[A]

Fenugreek.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

They got a lot of good stuff in here. All the jokes aside about Mars Men, if you're feeling exhausted and tired all day, if you're one of those people where the tea feels like it might have dropped a little bit high, cortisol is probably the issue. Okay?

[B]

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[A]

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[B]

Go to Mars.com for 50% off, three free gifts. When you check out, after you purchase,

[A]

they're going to ask you where you heard about them. Please support our show and let them know that we sent you cash out.

[B]

So. So one time I got scammed.

[A]

You got scammed?

[B]

Yeah, I did. A guy showed up at my house. I was living in La Jolla, right?

[A]

Oh, I remember.

[B]

Do you remember this story? Right? And he goes, hey, I'll give, you know, my car got dispossessed, right? Give me this money, I'll give it to you back. Right? But back then there was no Internet. But I would have used Cash app, right? Because then I would have got scammed.

[A]

Yeah. And they have security lock. That's the best part, man. Your money safe from fraud deserves to be a high priority. Cash app treats it just like that. Don't be like Bobby. Give your money out to a guy in La Jolla who says his car broke down with security lock. Cash app requires a successful face ID or biometric authentication to access your account. It's your money is protected. It's like your own little personal bodyguard, even if your phone is lost or stolen.

[B]

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[A]

Your Cash App setting.

[B]

Yeah, exactly.

[A]

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[B]

Cash App is a financial Service platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App's bank partners. Visit Cash App slash legal podcast for full disclosures.

[A]

Wait, you're for your Congolese?

[C]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

From the Congo.

[C]

Yeah, I had a lot of. In my DNA.

[B]

Well, people. Some people don't know.

[C]

3% Asian, Latino, and Latino.

[A]

What do you mean, Asian and Latino?

[B]

From the waist down.

[A]

From the shoes.

[B]

From the shoes, because what?

[C]

They were made. Anyway, no, I showed some of. I'm from the tribes from the. From. From Louisiana. I know that it's just a bunch of. Man, hold on, stop.

[B]

I gotta do some talking here. What the. Do you mean there are tribes in Louisiana?

[C]

Yeah, like the. The Indian indigenous tribe.

[B]

Oh, those tribes.

[C]

I thought you mean the Condolees from Sri Lanka. I got people all over there. I got people in South America, Puerto Rico. So I. This whole thing where I was looking up my own 23andMe.

[A]

Chitty Macha tribe of Louisiana.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

Shoota tribe of Louisiana. Jenna Band sounds like a porn star of Choctaw.

[C]

And I found out I was part of the lineage of Farrakhan. No, Ramsey the third.

[D]

Oh, wow.

[B]

Whoa. That's crazy. So you're a mixture of people.

[C]

Yeah, I'm royalty up in this. Yeah.

[B]

All right.

[D]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

No, nothing.

[B]

Yes, you're your royalty to us in this video. Yeah.

[C]

Oh, speaking of which, I found out I got a sister through. Through the 23 of me.

[A]

Where's she at?

[B]

Where's she at?

[C]

She's in Detroit.

[A]

And have you contacted her?

[C]

Yeah, because she was my uncle's daughter.

[A]

Holy.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

What?

[A]

So your. Your uncle isn't.

[C]

Yeah, her father.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

Wow.

[C]

Yeah. So she wound up being my father's daughter.

[A]

And it's your bro. It's your dad's brother.

[C]

No, no, no.

[A]

It was your mom's brother.

[C]

No, no, no.

[A]

Your mom had a kid with her brother.

[B]

Wait, wait, no, I'm kidding.

[C]

My father had a kid with her mother.

[A]

I know.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

So in other words, there's some cheating going up. Brotherly love.

[A]

How old is this sister?

[C]

She's two years younger than me.

[A]

Oh, wow.

[B]

Have you ever met her?

[C]

Right when my mother and father had separated in a little spat that they had, yeah.

[B]

Have you met her?

[C]

No, she's. I just told you, she was. At first, she was my cousin. Now she's my sister.

[A]

So, yes, he's met her.

[B]

I imagine that.

[C]

Yeah. So all this time, I thought she was my cousin. I was like, oh, no.

[B]

Do you feel closer now to her?

[C]

I've always been real close to her. I Think my father knew? Cause before he died, he was like, make sure you take care of her.

[B]

You sure, dad? Darth Vader. Yeah. It's anakin Skywalker. Your father.

[C]

23 me is crazy, because then I found.

[B]

Yeah, I know it is.

[C]

That through ancestry, I found out that my grandfather isn't my mother's father.

[A]

Wait, let him finish. Say it again.

[C]

My grandfather isn't my mother's father.

[A]

Whom is he?

[C]

We still trying to. I just said, fuck it. I cut all of it off. I just quit. 23andMe and Ancestry. I'm like, I don't even wanna fucking deal with this. This is insane right now.

[A]

I don't think I wanna do it.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Don't find out some shit. You're like, fuck.

[A]

You find out no one in your family's your family. But would that even matter?

[C]

I don't think so. But I do feel like part of me is like, man, you know, I should. Should have. Because they were reaching out to me the other side. They were like, who the are you? Was this whole batter back and forth like this. And I feel like now that I cut off the. But I cut the websites off because they had these leaks with the data and the information and this breach.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

With 23andMe and stuff. But I'm like.

[B]

At this point, I'm like, they're out there.

[A]

They went to Congress. They proved that. They leaked that and nothing happened.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Nobody cares. No one gives.

[B]

They know my shit.

[A]

You're out. You're.

[B]

I'm out there.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

But we all are. This is gone. This. I love how Apple does commercials for security. And you're like, but you already sold us up the river.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

What's the difference?

[B]

Closure day doesn't work because it's all based on, like, something that. If you were to know. If you would put a news thing that said, this is real, the whole world will be cool.

[A]

No, like, nobody.

[B]

What are you talking about? Nobody cares. Like, the whole premise of the movie is that if you get it out. Yeah. And this is on the news, on a old tv, like, station news. Yeah. Everybody would, like, look at it, say, oh, yeah, that's true.

[A]

Right.

[B]

And then everybody will be cool.

[A]

Right. The Internet now is giving you 10 different opinions. Yeah. And you're allowed to start eating sardines and blueberries.

[B]

Are you saying. Are you saying that if they knew, like, cnn, all the legacy media outlets. Right. Yeah, we're saying the same thing. Like, this is real footage of aliens that we've tortured, people wouldn't Care. Some people will care and others will say, okay, who doesn't care? What kind of people wouldn't care?

[A]

Dude, you're. Come on, you're the media now. For you, the media now is so twisted. There's things that happen in front of us and we still don't believe it's real.

[C]

Well, you know what?

[A]

I think it doesn't even matter. People thought the Charlie Kirk thing was fake.

[C]

It's prepared.

[A]

But I'm saying it's because there's so much noise, nobody knows what's real.

[B]

All right, you don't even want to get me into that. But because, you know, Carlos and I.

[A]

So this is my point.

[B]

I mean, my point is, is just don't even get me started. Okay, I won't. But what I'm saying is, is I. That is true.

[A]

It's just. There's too much.

[B]

That is true. That's a truism, what you said. But what I'm saying is, is that that's a significant thing, right? If. Because that would mean that they're coming down. So you're saying to me right now, if there was an alien that came down and was just had his arm around Trump. What's that? You know they did that at UFC250. Josh Hokum. Yeah, Josh Hokum did that, right? And he said that Michelle Obama was a man, right?

[C]

Easy.

[A]

What did he say she had a penis?

[D]

Is that what. No, man.

[B]

Yeah, See, this was AI. Dude, look at my phone. Dude, you're gonna look at my phone.

[A]

That's his screensaver.

[B]

It's not my screen, but literally, look at my phone right now.

[A]

Dude, go back real fast. Just go back real fast. 23andMe. Data leak compromised a personal and genetic information of roughly 7 million people.

[C]

I was one of them. Yeah.

[A]

What?

[B]

That's on my phone.

[A]

I know you have the photo. We just found it on the Internet. What the does that do?

[B]

Because this. I'm. I'm into dog's frequency. We're frequency each other.

[C]

You know what?

[A]

Stop eating anchovies. Okay. Either way. What's going on?

[B]

No, no, but I think that frequent. Look at me right now. No, nothing.

[C]

No, in the end.

[B]

Okay, okay, okay. I'm doing disclosure day, dude.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Summon. I'm telling you this. The legacy media people don't ingest it the way they used to. So even if they all said it, everyone at home would go, nah, fuck them. They're in it together.

[C]

Well, even if they introduced them, I think this whole world after so long would just be Like Guardians of the Galaxy and Bright. You ever seen Bright? On fucking. On Netflix with Will Smith. Like, after a while, people would just be like, man, fuck these motherfuckers.

[D]

Why is they.

[A]

Oh, right. When they work together.

[C]

Yes. Like there would just be this whole.

[A]

Wasn't this movie atrocious? Yeah, it got. It got just lit up.

[B]

You saw that movie?

[C]

Yeah, I watched it because.

[A]

Was this post? This was pre slap or post slap?

[C]

It was pre.

[A]

Pre slap. He could get away with this. Isn't that funny? He could make such a terrible movie. And it's forgotten because he was so beloved. He does that. Now we're talking about.

[C]

That's Will Smith's Pluto Nash right there.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

This is.

[A]

No, this is.

[B]

Yeah. So what you're saying is, is that if there's alien colonies that land on planet Earth and they start like.

[A]

I think nobody cares.

[B]

No one would care. The premise is that this. They've been here for.

[A]

They have years and years.

[C]

Right? So if I look at it, I look at it kind of like. You ever read the Prince by Nicola Machiavelli?

[A]

No, I haven't read it.

[B]

I have his album, though. Purple Rain. Purple Rain. And it's very good.

[C]

But in chapter three of the Prince, right, they. He talks about how, like, when somebody comes in and takes over a region, what they want to do is the best thing for them to do is allow the people to keep their religions, to keep their laws and everything, and to go amongst them and live with them. So that's what I would think. What is happening to us, right? We're being slowly moved into an area where they already been here. They already like. And then they just gonna come out and they're gonna be like, hey, want to introduce you. Come on now. Fucking prayer madness. That's what I'm talking about. You know what? Bigfoot. Come on the out of here.

[B]

Oh, Bigfoot's part of it. Yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Is a Loch Ness monster too.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

He's a ufo. He's an intelligent species.

[B]

He ain't the Loch Ness monster.

[C]

Yeah. Hey. Wow, dude, you would stick up with not to loch this monster. See how Bobby is? He always gotta go.

[A]

I don't think that's in Machiavelli's book. I don't think Bigfoot is in there.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. I don't think.

[C]

No, no, no. But the whole point of that in chapter three is that, like, they live amongst us.

[A]

Sure.

[B]

The Kraken, all that.

[C]

So that brings in hybrids. Hybrids make sense, Bobby? Pretty much.

[B]

I'm a hybrid, bro.

[C]

You just said you was Korean. In part Vietnamese. What the.

[B]

You're Japanese. Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Don't let us get started. This is going to be conspiracy pod now.

[B]

I know. Yeah. This is a conspiracy theory.

[C]

Well, I mean the information we presenting so far is not most. It's not conspiracy. It's just the information that they're giving us.

[A]

Yeah, but that is conspiracy. We. It has been conspired. That information is because of conspiracy. That's why it's the alternative to what's going on.

[C]

It depends on what you're reading. Right.

[A]

Well, I know, but then yes, everything is a conspiracy. That's the point. Okay, look, here's apropos.

[C]

Here's apropos to nothing. Hey, are you okay?

[B]

Apropos to what?

[A]

Apropos to nothing.

[B]

What does that even mean?

[A]

He's saying. He's saying he's transitioning into something.

[B]

Okay? But let's go back to apropos.

[C]

I never asked you this.

[B]

Why are you pointing.

[C]

What is your name? Robert Lee. Are you named after the general? Is your name just Bobby Lee?

[A]

His name is.

[B]

No, don't, don't, don't answer that. He. You man. Yeah, yeah, you man.

[C]

I thought we was on the same frequency.

[B]

Alien frequency, but I don't know, man. You're on fish free frequency right now. Dude.

[A]

You're the one from the tribe down south.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

You know Robert and Bobby?

[B]

Yeah, it's Robert. It's Robert Young Lee is my name.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

I'm not going to give you my Social Security though.

[A]

Okay, Put it up on the screen Right here. 464-261-9.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. Why'd you ask?

[C]

Because Bobby is sharp, short for Robert, right?

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

So is your. Is it do black?

[B]

Yes, it is.

[A]

Do black people do that? Where we have like 10 names for one name? Do you ever do that?

[C]

Yeah, I call you Tino.

[A]

No, but I'm saying. I'm saying. No, no, that's. No, no, that I love, okay? That's the type of shit I fucking love. No, I'm saying white people will be like, William is also Bill. Like Richard is Dick sometimes. William is Dick is Bill. These are all black people don't do that. Right? Yeah, Like Bob is Robert is also

[B]

R. Richard as Rick.

[A]

Rick, Richard, Dick, William, Richie, Bill. They're all kind of this. There's for some reason they all get like mesh. Black people don't do that. That's why your names are so complex.

[B]

It's. You were Doc. Yeah. On your birth certificate it just says Doc.

[A]

No, that's not his birth name.

[C]

No, that's not my birth name.

[B]

What's your birth name?

[C]

William. You knew that.

[A]

How do you know that?

[B]

I didn't know that.

[C]

I got the same name as Bill Burr. Yeah, some people call me Bill. Some call me Will.

[B]

I can call you Bill.

[C]

Call me. What the you want to call me? You know, it's people who call me that. Like, if I go to certain white people, Tito. And then they'd be like, hey, Bill, come through. I'm like, all right.

[B]

You call him Bill.

[A]

I have.

[B]

I've never called you Bill, ever.

[C]

Well, why would you?

[A]

Yeah, but you don't know. You didn't even know that was his name. So you just would call him a name you don't even know.

[B]

Doc.

[A]

That's the name that you're for. You're.

[B]

Yes, that's how you know I was conditioned with Doc. Right, right. It's a conditioning system.

[C]

You know you did that. My Uncle Pete, what is he called? He calls me Willie Boy. Willy Boy.

[A]

Willy.

[B]

Hey, Willy Boy, if I called you Willy Boy.

[A]

No, no, no, no, no. That's not going to work the same. I don't think you can call a black dude Willy Boy in public.

[B]

If I get his permission, I could.

[A]

I don't think it's going to go over well.

[C]

Public, He's Korean. Yeah.

[A]

You and a group outside, and we go, hey, Willy Boy, get over here. I don't know if that's gonna work.

[C]

If it was your mom, everybody be like, what the. This goddamn Karen on here.

[B]

Yeah. So I'll do apropos to nothings, too. Apropos to nothing.

[A]

What's your shoe size?

[D]

7.

[C]

8.

[D]

8.

[B]

8.

[A]

We know that.

[C]

Yeah. Great.

[A]

Judd. Apropos to nothing. We know.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

No, but that. I. But that's what's interesting about, like, the. The. Your. Your name is what white guys do with white names.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

You know what I mean? That's what white guys do with white names. But I see that more often. Not. Black dudes don't have five variations of the same name.

[C]

No, we get nicknames. You get nicknames based on whatever your physical disability is.

[D]

Correct.

[C]

You know what I mean?

[B]

What do you mean? If I was growing up in your neighborhood, right, and I had three toes missing, what would be my.

[A]

No, no, no, no.

[C]

Just be like, Tiptoe. Come on up.

[B]

Okay. I just had two nubs and I walk in.

[D]

What's up?

[B]

Willie. Willie boy.

[D]

What's up?

[B]

All right. What would you call me?

[C]

I don't know. If you had Two nubs. Yeah.

[A]

Oh, no arms.

[B]

Yeah. No arms.

[C]

Oh, there's a comedian on social media called Train Ups and that's. I don't know what to say.

[B]

Yeah, let's look up Trade ups, dude.

[A]

Shout out to trainers.

[B]

Yeah. What's up? Train up.

[A]

Damn.

[C]

Damn.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I didn't know.

[C]

Dude, he got some fun.

[B]

Yeah. Okay, so that's.

[A]

Train his. So funny.

[B]

That's so funny.

[A]

Rock, paper, scissors.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

He wins every.

[C]

Well, I follow him on the gram. That's my dog. I like to laugh.

[A]

That's fun.

[B]

That's incredible. Wow.

[A]

So now, because we're so progressive, are the bathrooms now signs gonna say, please wash your nubs before you go back to work?

[C]

Jesus Christ. Instead of having hands, it's got like.

[A]

Well, look at that. Look at. Go back to that one. Go back to the first clip of that. He doesn't even need the barbell. His arms are the.

[B]

Out there.

[C]

He out there getting them shoulders strong right there. I think that's what I'm talking about.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

How did he lose? He was born with no nubs. I mean, with the nubs.

[C]

I didn't even dive into it.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

I gotta follow a lot of people with their handicaps.

[A]

I just be like, give us some others, please.

[B]

Why, though?

[A]

Shout out to Train Nubs. By the way, we love.

[C]

Cause they inspire me and shit. Yeah. And it keeps me in check. Soon as I start complaining and I'm going through my feet, I'm like, God, man, you mother. Okay, let me get my shit.

[A]

It makes you appreciative for your blessing.

[C]

Yeah. It's like my boy Luis. You know Luis? Remember Luis the comedian and Puerto Rican comedian in the wheelchair?

[D]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

I always put him on my Instagram. That's my, like, my little brother. But I like to be around him because he checks me. Anything I try to say. If I go to, like, complain, he'd just be looking at me like, you little bitch. Why that shit feels good?

[A]

Because he's saying, look at how good you have it.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

If he's just like, man, I can't. Blank, blank, blank. Luis is like, yeah, I can't get in most buildings.

[C]

I can't say shit.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

You remember Fancy or Carlos, my cousin I bought? He has md. No md Muscular.

[A]

He's a doctor.

[C]

No. He wished he didn't cure himself.

[B]

I don't have any friends that have that. Does that make me a bad person?

[A]

Yes.

[C]

You don't have any handicapped friends. Yes, you do. Who come back to you yourself. No. Oh, my bad.

[A]

He is his closest friend.

[C]

To be fair, you don't have anybody. You know.

[B]

Can we go back to the joke? I want to address the joke. Right. What the do you mean, dude?

[C]

I mean.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

You think I'm handicapped?

[A]

Well, he's saying you're. You're high functioning.

[B]

I'm a Honda. Oh, I see.

[C]

What?

[B]

Right.

[A]

You're not handy, are you?

[C]

Are you?

[B]

Are you? What are you?

[C]

Spectrum A little bit. Nothing like that. All four of us?

[B]

No. Shopify. You know, we have an online business here at Bad Friends. And we only use the bass and we use Shopify. Do you know why?

[A]

Because they have the best tools, the AI tools and design templates that I've seen to set up an incredible site to get everything running fast. No coding needed. And I'm telling you, they help keep those customers coming in and staying with your business.

[B]

Let me tell you something, okay? Inside my house, I. Interior design.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Right. Because I want it to look like the way I want it to look like. Right. That's what Shopify does.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Right. You want it to look like what you want it to look like. Let's be honest with ourselves, okay? And that's what Shopify provides.

[A]

That's what they do.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

If questions come up, Shopify's built in AI assistant sidekick is ready to help you build, troubleshoot, and keep things moving so you're not stressed out. You're not out in the ocean searching for something to hold on to. Shopify is here to help your business. They handle the setup and the checkout so you have more time to focus on growing your business and all of the tools to do it.

[B]

Shopify powers millions of businesses worldwide. The whole world.

[D]

The whole world.

[B]

Think about the whole world. From household names like Mattel, Gymshark to small businesses just getting started.

[A]

Kind of like right here on Bad Friends.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

All you need is the idea. Shopify handles the rest.

[B]

Cha Ching.

[A]

Start your free trial at shopify.com Bad

[B]

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[A]

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[B]

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[A]

Intend. Instead, you spent it all, but now you. Now you know.

[B]

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[B]

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[A]

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[B]

because people ask me that all the time. Are you on the edge?

[C]

You know what?

[A]

You.

[B]

Yeah, I'm not. I went to a doctor.

[C]

Oh, you did?

[B]

My therapist says you're not. My psychiatrist says you're not. What? I took the tests.

[C]

So proud of you.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. So I don't. But people think that I am Spectrum.

[A]

But you lied on the test when we took it. Oh, yeah, you lied. We had it on camera. We took an autism test. He lied the whole time.

[B]

No, I didn't.

[A]

Everything.

[B]

That was a gay test.

[A]

Oh, the gay test. You lied.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That wasn't the autism test. Do you have autism?

[C]

No.

[B]

Okay. All right.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

The way he answered it was like something he didn't need. He's like, no, I don't need that.

[B]

I don't.

[A]

I don't need that. I don't need that at all.

[B]

But who knows? We're not psychiatrists. What do we know?

[A]

Or were autistic.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And they're not.

[B]

I think that. I mean, I. I think you have things that. I'm not a psychiatrist, but I think you have them.

[A]

Autism?

[B]

No. Something else you remember to movie with. I don't want to say it.

[A]

You say it.

[B]

I think you're bipolar.

[A]

Oh, 100%.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think you're bipolar.

[A]

100%.

[C]

Remember Robert Dairo?

[B]

I Know Robert Dairo, anger management.

[C]

A little bit.

[A]

There's no way I'm not bipolar.

[B]

There's 100%. You are.

[A]

You think you are 100.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[C]

Do you find yourself in the bottom of the. Like, at the rock bottom.

[B]

When I can tell that he's down, I step away because it's sad.

[A]

Well, I have clinical depression. I've spoken very openly about that. I mean, I've been diagnosed with depression. But I mean, that's. But that's. But I mean, that's when I'm very low but extreme emotional highs. Mania or hypomania. Lows. Depression. Yeah. I absolutely have many mania swings.

[C]

I used to be like that.

[A]

Oh, dude. Yeah. I have it bad.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

But I'm definitely not going to take anything for it. Let's ride the lightning, dude. Dude, I'll see you when it's over.

[C]

That's what happened to me.

[A]

I just don't want to take pills to, like, level me to a place where.

[B]

Let Willie boy just speak. Go ahead.

[A]

It hurts to hear it.

[C]

I heard a little bit.

[B]

Why? Willie, Billy, Willie, William.

[A]

Do you know, like, the. The history of.

[B]

I. I was a joke. Will. William.

[C]

No, no. Willie boy is cool. Because that's my.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. Y boy's cool.

[C]

I'm trying to.

[B]

We're all good.

[A]

I was about to do a.

[C]

If.

[D]

If.

[C]

This depends on what sharp turn.

[B]

What? I love you.

[A]

Calling a black person boy, is offensive. It strips them their dignity only, man.

[C]

Black hole, son.

[B]

Yeah, Black hole, son.

[C]

You're your T shirt.

[B]

I know.

[A]

What. So what are you gonna say? What were you saying?

[C]

Oh, I was gonna say you were clinically depressed. Went through clinical depression. I did, too. My mom sent me to a psychiatrist. And when it was right, maybe the first year I moved out here, the second year.

[B]

Why wait? Why won't you take medication?

[C]

Because at that time, I just didn't trust this person who I just didn't know. You know, the one thing about meeting somebody, and they say they're qualified, when you go to them as an individual who's suffering, you're like, you don't know me. So there's a defense mechanism that happens. So in order for you to be open to that, you have to be willing to say, either they have to put you in a jacket and make you take it, or you have to be comfortable with who you're dealing with. And so for me, I was, like, talking to this person, and I'm like, I didn't deal with the streets and did shit on the streets. That I can't even talk to you about you telling me medicine. Fuck you. It was just like one of those things where I was like, nah, I'll figure it out. And plus side effects. It bothers. That's a big issue with people.

[B]

Well, with Lexapro, right. I can get erect, but I can't climax, you know, and. But it took two years with my psychiatrist knowing me, talking to him every week, and he's like, I think we should try it.

[A]

Alexa.

[B]

There was too many days of just being, you know, I don't know what joy. I didn't know what joy was because of the ruminating thoughts. Constant ruminating thoughts about. Of the past or, you know, I mean, and constantly. And it was just. I've always been in low level depression. My whole life.

[C]

Life.

[B]

And then what happened was I took it. Yeah, I can't come.

[C]

That's the most.

[A]

Makes me a little more sad.

[B]

Yeah, I can't come. Right. But I don't have those ruminating thoughts anymore.

[A]

That's good. You trade.

[B]

So I. I'd say either come or be depressed. I would rather be depressed.

[C]

Interesting.

[B]

No, I mean, what are the options? I mean, if I'm.

[C]

If.

[B]

I mean, you can get a rest.

[C]

Keep it real. Yeah, keep it real. Damn. Cause I. I was depressed and still jacking off. So. That's what I'm trying to say. Like, I was still watching porn, so.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

Well, that didn't help.

[B]

That didn't help.

[A]

That probably pushed you deeper into the depression.

[C]

Well. Well, yeah, it probably did. But I think for me, I had others. I was surrounded by more positive people, such as my mom. And I wasn't afraid to. So a lot of times I give

[B]

you two options and you're just really. Just either come or be happier.

[C]

Be happier.

[B]

Okay, good.

[A]

I think some people that work. Some people, it doesn't work. I. I didn't like taking it. I tried it and I did not enjoy the way I felt. I felt super because I had depersonalization syndrome. You know what that is? It's terrible for people that have lived through that. You want. That you want to talk about insane. It really felt like I was looking at my. Well, if you've ever done psychedelics, occasionally you feel kind of like you're like looking at the machine. You're, like staring at, like, what is this thing carrying me through time and space. But it's not fun or interesting. It's sad and weird. It makes you feel like you're detached from your surroundings. You physically feel like I would get sick.

[C]

Right.

[A]

If I went somewhere, like, I would go to class sometimes and I would get to the class, I would fight through all these feelings. I'd get there and then I'd get right back on my skateboard and go right back home from. Because I just couldn't do it. I felt like it was like I wasn't me and I was in a body and I.

[C]

You feel like you're. You're just floating. Yeah.

[A]

You feel like you're floating. It's awful. Yeah. It's a bad. But that I will say people that have lived through that. It's not fun. It feels weird. And then when I cracked, when it. When I leveled out or whatever. I don't know what they call it. Not medical.

[C]

Best feeling in the world.

[A]

I remember when it happened. Happened because I was leaving my buddy's condo that I was staying in. And on the floor of the. Of the front door, there was a mosaic tile. It was like a sunrise art piece that someone had made. And I've never noticed it in. In the two years I lived there. I never knew there was a picture on the floor and I was leaving. And I saw it when I opened the door. And something was changing in me. Like I felt. Felt like myself in the moment. Myself.

[B]

You got in the. You observed something.

[A]

It was wild.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Well, that's what. What Basically my mother told me too. She said, why are you laughing every time.

[B]

You bring up your mom a lot.

[A]

She's. He loves her.

[B]

I know. I love my mom too. Go ahead. I'm not laughing at you at the hip with her.

[C]

That's actually. But we'll talk about that another time. But anyway, my mom's told me, she said, because I had that moment of clarity like you had after so long. And then when it started happening and she saw it, she said, had you just stuck with the therapist, you would have been. Had that. So there is.

[A]

You would have got there faster.

[C]

Yeah, it would have got there faster.

[A]

But who cares? I think it's all part of the thing.

[C]

Yeah. Yeah. And that's the beauty of understanding yourself and knowing where you are. But in that moment, that's the hardest thing. You don't really know because even when we talk about Lexapro, we see what happened. Cause Brody Stevens talked about it. So that's the other side. So it's just. You never know how it's going to affect you, but you just do your best.

[A]

You don't know how it's going to affect.

[B]

Yeah, right.

[A]

People change medications.

[C]

What was your Build up to that. To that moment. Do you remember what was the.

[A]

Why did all that happen?

[C]

Well, what was the.

[A]

I had a bunch of. I had a bunch of.

[C]

Not. Not the bad part. The part where you pulled out. Because that's what the fans will really want to hear. That.

[A]

Oh, when I crack.

[B]

How do you know what our fans want to hear?

[A]

I don't know. It sounds like he does because they

[C]

always hit me up all the time, like I like or when I'm watching the. The stuff that they say, they. They're like, yeah, yeah, I love this type of car. They like stuff like that.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

What pulled me out was. I mean, I hate to say it's. It's kind of like time. Time helped me a lot, and I slowly started to. What's the best way to compare this to Is like, this is a very weak comparison, but I. I can't find that. I can't artic. It. Have you ever gone skiing?

[C]

No.

[A]

You never skied? Ever?

[C]

Good laugh, Bobby. I like the way Bobby laughed. It was the most preposterous way to look at somebody. Like, doc, you've been. Come on. It's possible.

[A]

Do black people ski? They do.

[B]

They do.

[A]

I've seen them, some of them.

[B]

Yeah, sure. They look like penguins.

[A]

So funny.

[C]

I'mma be honest with you. I don't personally, I don't know nobody black.

[B]

That black.

[C]

Sk. Yeah.

[B]

Let's get these skis.

[C]

Let's go hit these slopes. Right.

[A]

So you're going to relate to this. Two percent of black American ski.

[B]

Yeah, exactly.

[A]

All right.

[B]

So, you know, that's why I laughed.

[A]

You know what it feels like? It feels like not racism. It feels like once you. Once you get over, once you've tried something over and over and over. Okay, here. You know in a video game. You know in a video game when you can't beat the boss and you keep doing and you try different ways to beat the boss, and when you're a kid and you're trying to figure it out, and then, you know, when you figure it out and it kind of. Everything lines up and it is. If you're like, I could have easily beat the ball. How did I not? How did I not know how to.

[B]

Elden Ring?

[A]

Exactly.

[C]

It's the same thing when it's like,

[A]

that's what it feels like.

[B]

Elden Ring is the hardest game ever made.

[A]

And once you beat it, and it takes.

[B]

It takes a month just to kill one boss. What are you doing?

[C]

What's the name of that?

[A]

Elden Ring?

[B]

The Is that it's a video game.

[C]

Elden Ring.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. And it's the guy that did Game of Thrones. What's his name?

[A]

Peter Jackson.

[B]

Not Peter Jackson.

[C]

So this game was once popular amongst.

[B]

It's still popular.

[C]

What about you guys? You guys heard of it?

[B]

Yeah, it's fake. Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Movies coming now.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, there's a movie.

[C]

How long ago did this come out?

[B]

It's. I don't know, three or four years ago. But it's an open world game. Every time you meet a boss, it takes weeks. You die. Over and over and over and over again. But there's something about the game is when you actually beat one. The Fire Giant is the worst. That took me two weeks. Look up the Fire Giant.

[A]

Comparison was good. That is what it feels like.

[B]

That's exactly what it feels like. That's why I brought it up. You feel this thing right here? Dude. This guy right here.

[C]

Dude, that's Blanca from Street Fight.

[B]

No, it's not Blanca. No, it's not Blanca. No, it's not.

[A]

Look at the size of that.

[B]

Look at the size. And look at how little your character is.

[A]

And he has a mouth on his body, dude.

[B]

He touches you, you die.

[A]

Yeah, well, he has fire in his hand.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. Any of that touches you, you die.

[C]

You know, I think you get the same, like, feeling and excitement when you beat Bowser.

[A]

Oh, yeah, that's where my old school, I guess.

[B]

Bowser. Yeah, that's a good reference, too.

[A]

No, that is true. That is exactly where my mind went.

[C]

That motherfucker. When he was throwing a. That.

[B]

Oh, look up. Bowser. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think my fire giant's a little scarier. But, baby, here's another thing I discovered is, is that your body just instinctually tells you to stop. So, like, when I quit smoking.

[A]

Yeah, It's.

[D]

It's.

[B]

My body just says it's. It's stop. You know what I mean? This new thing, this new sardine kick. I know you're laughing at me and you.

[C]

And you keep bringing up these.

[B]

This whole health thing and the fasting and stuff. You influenced me on the fasting, okay. Because when I got my colonoscopy, I had to fast that, you know, the day before.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Right. And I showed up and I felt better that night.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, I mean, because. And when I eat processed foods, like hamburgers or whatever it might be, it makes me feel like.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And so I think I'm in a new era because my body is telling me to do this shit.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

The first I'm being real.

[B]

I know you're. I think, I think you're mocking me. And I think you're mocking me. I think they're mocking me and I think they think it's a phase.

[A]

How I just said.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, you can.

[A]

Wait, wait. Well, first of all, if you can do it, I'm not mocking you. But it is a phase. These two things can be true. Okay, you will. 100 knock. Stick to it. But I'm not mocking you. I'm supportive. Do you remember in Australia when you were like, wait till you see how jacked I get. And then you wanted to bet me you were going to get jacked and you were like, I'm going to be in the gym. And remember that?

[B]

Yeah. I went to Planet Fitness and they wouldn't accept my membership. And then you start doing a thousand

[A]

pull ups and A thousand. How many days did that last?

[C]

Yeah, don't listen to him.

[A]

Yeah, keep going.

[B]

Yeah, I know.

[C]

Trying to deter you from success.

[B]

I know.

[A]

What would Trey Nub say?

[B]

What?

[A]

I'm gonna get a bracelet that says

[C]

more Doritos. Don't listen to trading.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I love, I believe in you and I want you to be healthy.

[D]

I've.

[A]

I've encouraged you to be healthy our entire friendship. I'm just saying you do great. You have big phases.

[C]

Have you fasted?

[A]

No, no, no. Oh, God, no.

[B]

Oh, Lord, I'll have mercy. You have to, bro.

[A]

I'm telling you, I don't want it.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

If you can discipline yourself though, and get into the 48 and then in the 72 and you get. Once you get that enlightenment, it's like a lightheaded feeling people say. But for me it's like a. Oh, like you're floating. It's the most beautiful.

[B]

Here's the problem.

[A]

It's like a bottle of pinot.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So yesterday I wanted to do a 48, but I knew I had a pod today. So I don't know if I was doing a 48 that I could have potted.

[C]

What if you did 24? You still is like really close into that.

[A]

Well, it's halfway.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

Literally.

[B]

But 24 is hard.

[C]

Is it?

[B]

It's hard, dude.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

The first eight hours it's fine, but then it's like, you know, I mean, I had a Mendocino Far farms untouched chicken parmesan sandwich in the fridge.

[A]

Sounds so good, right?

[B]

And it was like talking. Hey, how you doing? I'm in the end. I was like, shut the up.

[A]

Pick one bite.

[B]

Who Cares.

[A]

No one's gonna number are fine, man.

[B]

And 10 hours.

[A]

Take a nibble.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I did not do it.

[A]

Good for you.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. I did not do it. But at midnight. That was the 24 hour mark. I ate the sardines.

[A]

Good.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Anyway, I'm still fasting. I'm still. I'm still doing it.

[B]

Oh, what day are you on?

[C]

I. I haven't done it today, but I did it this week. So it's like how many days? I just like I'm addicted to the high. The feeling of it. It's just this feeling. I'm telling you to.

[A]

How many days are you doing it? Two days.

[C]

I do two days. Yeah.

[A]

And just water, lemon, Salt water and lemon water.

[C]

That's it.

[A]

That's it. No salt.

[C]

No salt.

[D]

Wow.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I don't want to.

[C]

It's not. It's a small amount of electrolytes, but it's just. I just like it for just the citrus.

[B]

Well, I'm gonna. I'm gonna. I've never done a two day. I need two days off. And when I have that two days off.

[C]

Do do

[B]

do do.

[C]

Sixteen.

[B]

What's a sixteen? Eight.

[C]

That's eight hours eating and sixteen without two days. Do them two back, back to back and see how you feel. Okay, so what you're doing, you're trying to jump straight into 24, 48, which is actually pretty. Pretty good for you to do to 24. Yeah, yeah. Round applause. Okay. It's so hard and everything.

[B]

Oh, you're not gonna clap. Try it. You do it.

[C]

You don't want to motivate.

[B]

You do it. You do it and you see.

[A]

I'll do it.

[B]

I'll clap if you do it.

[A]

It I'll do. In fact, I'll do it. I'll get to 48 before you will.

[B]

Oh, okay. We got to be together cuz if

[A]

it's a competition, we got to be do it together. You know, I'm down.

[B]

We have to do it together.

[A]

And I'm going to have. You know what's going to.

[B]

Dude, that's good. We do it together in a house.

[A]

And how about this? And then food is getting delivered the entire time.

[B]

I do a challenge. Yeah, us three should do it at the same time.

[A]

People. Just people coming to go and eating at the house.

[B]

No, we do an air. We get an Airbnb.

[A]

He doesn't need to be because he can be there.

[B]

But he it. He's a lying Willie.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. I don't know. You're a lying Willie.

[C]

Dude.

[B]

And I don't know dude. So that's your new name right now? I don't even know. Right. So what I need to do is I need to get an Airbnb somewhere in, like, you know, Joshua Tree.

[C]

I don't.

[A]

I don't want to go out that far.

[C]

I'll go.

[D]

All right.

[B]

We'll go to where?

[A]

We'll just stay Victorville. We'll stay here.

[B]

All right. We'll stay here. No, but we have to be. Get an Airbnb and live together for three, two days.

[C]

But why would we order food?

[B]

No, he's making it extra challenge.

[A]

No, I'm saying, people, it's nothing. Yeah, for him it's not a problem. For you and I, it's a problem. Yeah.

[B]

So we get all Arctic. I get my own water, though.

[A]

No, no, no.

[B]

Yeah, I want Arctic water.

[A]

No, tap water. Tap water.

[B]

No, no tap water. I get Arctic water. I need my tap. I need my Celtic sea salt.

[A]

You do. You do drink tap?

[C]

I drink tap if.

[A]

Well, you drink it all the time. Do you ever go to a restaurant and get water?

[B]

No, I don't. I get a bottle.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah, that's tap.

[B]

Bottle is tap.

[C]

I ask them sometimes.

[A]

A lot of bottles are equivalent to tap, by the way.

[B]

That's why I said Ark Arctic.

[A]

Yeah, you want fancy.

[B]

No, I look. I look at the best water in the market with less of all the

[C]

what brand you get. So that Mountain View brand right there, who's it.

[A]

I like Mountain Valley. I love this.

[B]

I haven't drank any of this.

[A]

This is my favorite.

[C]

You got some glass. What is that?

[B]

But actually, if you look at the rating on it, it's not that high.

[A]

But anyway, it is pretty good.

[B]

Oh, we'll look at the rating. But we did.

[A]

We looked it up. It's pretty good.

[B]

It's one of the highest. Oh, it's good, right? Water then.

[C]

Interesting.

[B]

But can we do two days of fast?

[A]

Yeah, we could.

[B]

I don't think this is going to happen. I think Doc and I. I think you'll give up.

[A]

I 100% agree. The sheer competitiveness in my body will make me beat you.

[B]

No, we'll just do 48, and then

[A]

I'm going to go as far. I'll die just to beat you. I'll die. I'll just die.

[C]

I got to see this.

[A]

Because I don't believe dead friends.

[C]

I don't believe him. He's born.

[D]

What?

[C]

I don't believe him.

[B]

I don't believe him either. I don't believe you lying. Willie.

[A]

You don't think. You don't think I'll do.

[D]

Do it?

[A]

No, no, that's insane.

[B]

That's. Yeah, I don't think you would do

[A]

it either after 48.

[B]

I did 24 on my own.

[C]

I'm not saying you can't.

[A]

I can. I will.

[B]

Dude, do 24 to. To tomorrow, okay?

[A]

I have to fast tomorrow morning anyway.

[C]

Oh, you weaning them on. He said he can just do it on the first take.

[A]

I can.

[B]

When's your last meal? When was your last meal? Today.

[A]

Today. Earlier.

[B]

At like, what time?

[A]

11:30.

[B]

11:30.

[A]

I haven't eaten since then.

[B]

Do you believe them?

[A]

You could call my family. I mean, what do you.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay, so you haven't together at 11:30 and then. I haven't had anything in my life that's the case.

[C]

I had eggs and spinach at 8 in the morning. I haven't ate.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, I. I had a can of sardines in the morning, but I already fasted yesterday. So it's like. Should I do it again?

[C]

Well, yeah, this is the second day, so whenever we was.

[A]

I could do it because tomorrow morning I can't have any. I have to go get blood drawn and I can't be. You can't.

[B]

All right, so don't eat until tomorrow at 11:30.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Tonight?

[D]

Sure.

[C]

What time you going to get blood drawn?

[A]

7:30.

[B]

That's. I don't trust him. I don't trust you. I don't trust anybody in this room. We have to be in the same house.

[C]

Yeah, that's kind of.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah, we'll get the nicest Airbnb in town.

[C]

I don't want this.

[B]

Yeah, me either. I'm gonna set it up.

[A]

I can tell you. Because if I go home tonight, what's his.

[B]

Let me the two date.

[A]

Give me drink water.

[B]

Give me two dates that he's not traveling. Okay. So that I can myself get the nicest Airbnb in Studio City. Can we record it? Yeah, we'll record it. Right. And we're going to do two days of fasting.

[A]

Okay, I'm in.

[B]

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

[C]

So the two days of fasting, are we going to go straight? No water and food too?

[D]

No, you got.

[B]

No, no, no, no, no, no. We got to get water. What do we know? Yeah, you have to have water. Yeah, you have to have water without water.

[A]

I know, but that's foolish.

[B]

That's not. That's foolish. That's dying.

[A]

That's bad for you.

[B]

That's what they say.

[C]

But People do it.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah, people do it.

[C]

Right. And there's no side effects to it.

[A]

We don't need that. Water is good for water.

[B]

And I want my salt.

[D]

Salt.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

And it's going to flush you out. It's good. The water's gonna.

[B]

It's gonna be the two worst days of our lives.

[C]

Because it's kind of hard after coming up.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's torture.

[A]

The bad fast.

[B]

Yeah, the bad fast.

[A]

We're gonna do it.

[C]

Yeah, we'll do it.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

And the fans with us when we do it, join with us, and we all gonna have that enlightenment together.

[B]

Two days.

[A]

It's gonna be tough.

[B]

Yeah, it's gonna be tough.

[A]

Can you do three?

[B]

I don't think I can do three.

[A]

Once we get to two, we might be able to just go to three. Now here's the other stipulation. Are we sleeping in the same room?

[C]

No.

[D]

No.

[A]

We got to keep an eye on each other. I don't know what you're up to. I don't think the way that this guy orders food through his phone, he's got a little secret.

[B]

We'll be there. We're gonna be the guardian.

[A]

You're a rat.

[B]

You're not a guardian. You're a rat. Carlos is a rat.

[C]

Dude, you should.

[B]

I won't be eating either. I'll just be fasting now.

[A]

Carlos always fasts.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

For years, I've seen Carlos not eat for a couple days.

[B]

Carlos also will. Him and I have side hustle hustles. And he'll do things for me that you won't even be aware of.

[A]

That's my point.

[B]

That's why I don't think he can't be there.

[A]

No.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Because he'll get you stuff.

[C]

Carlos, you. You went without. You went fasting before.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. I've been having smoothies and avocado toast for a year.

[C]

That's not fast. And playboy, what does he say?

[B]

Yeah. So long times without eating, and then he does it. I'll be honest. When we're on the road, we'll go to a steakhouse. He'll just get a chicken Caesar salad.

[D]

It.

[B]

No chicken.

[A]

No chicken. But then he also won't even finish it. He'll get like. He'll take five bites and stop.

[B]

But I had a quarter pounder before I came here.

[A]

This is another thing I'm going to

[C]

talk to about the fasting outside of that that they have. But I. I'm talking straight. No food.

[A]

Yeah, no food. Just watch.

[B]

Yeah, exactly.

[A]

The amount of McDonald's you've been eating is alarming.

[C]

Oh, it's a treat for myself before

[B]

bad friends, so I don't like.

[A]

But that's like three days a week.

[B]

You have trauma responses to this place.

[C]

What do you mean?

[B]

Like, you.

[A]

You.

[B]

You feel like when I walked in the door, it was almost like you reacted like it was a trauma or something. Ones.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Because you showed up so early. I've never seen that in my life.

[A]

Yeah, we've never seen that. That was wild.

[C]

Do you get a Happy Meal? What? How does this work? What are you doing?

[B]

I don't need the fries or drink or the toy, obviously. Yeah, you need the toy.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Wait, you got a double quarter pounder?

[B]

No, I got a quarter pounder.

[D]

Just one.

[A]

No cheese.

[B]

No, with cheese.

[A]

And no fries.

[B]

No fries. And then four nuggets on the side.

[C]

The nuggets?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

That's so.

[C]

It's not even nuggets.

[B]

That's not chicken. There's no chicken in there.

[C]

I don't know.

[B]

I don't care, man.

[C]

I'm a human, and I'm.

[A]

That's. If you want to just do chick fil a those. That's real chicken.

[B]

It's about convenience off the freeway. Oh, my God.

[A]

Oh, you like chick fil A, don't you?

[B]

Yeah, we love it.

[C]

The spices.

[B]

The spices, dude, when I bit into the.

[C]

My first chick fil a sandwich.

[B]

Tell. Tell us this experience, man.

[A]

I was like, yeah, detail it.

[C]

You. It just was just like a mesmerizing experience when I bit into that.

[B]

Well, let's go to the ordering process. I was like, hello. Next order, it's talk the.

[C]

You. No, that was. You said, my bad. My bad. My bad.

[A]

Jesus Christ, Doc.

[C]

My bad. It was.

[B]

It was that delicious.

[C]

Yeah. I stay away from there now.

[B]

I know you do, because you tongue it and the chicken doesn't like it.

[A]

When's the last time. When's the last time you had f. Fast food?

[C]

Last time I had a fast food, I. I had in and out.

[A]

When?

[C]

About two, three days ago.

[D]

Oh.

[A]

What the.

[B]

You can still do that every once in a while?

[C]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

I haven't.

[B]

What do you get there?

[C]

I just get the same number one every time. Double, double with extra tomatoes and no onions and chilies on the side. Aros, jalapenos. Let's go.

[A]

Wait a minute. Dude, you get extra tomato?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

That is a wild order.

[B]

No onion. Onion is key, man.

[A]

Wait, but extra tomato, so it's just makes it sloshier, sloppier.

[C]

It's not sloppier. No, they are fresh. You got this ain't. And out.

[A]

I don't mess with in and out.

[D]

The.

[C]

I can't. The. The. The single burger. The number two.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

On myself every time.

[B]

But if I get one, I don't

[C]

know what it is about the.

[B]

I get the number two.

[C]

It's not enough ground beef on there or something.

[B]

Oh, okay.

[A]

I do a 3x3.

[B]

That's you on yourself.

[C]

Yeah. It's like. It give me diarrhea. I don't know what the. Every time I'm in this, I'm just holding on a throne.

[D]

All right. Right.

[A]

And no fries.

[C]

Yeah, I get the fry, but they. They in. And I'll make you mad with the fries.

[A]

Sometimes you just got to ask for them extra crispy.

[C]

I hate that. That's the what I hate.

[A]

You got to just ask for it.

[B]

Oh, he doesn't like extra crispy.

[A]

Oh, no. See, I feel like they're always undercooked at in n out. That's what everyone feels.

[C]

Really.

[A]

Always. I mean, that's like part of their thing.

[C]

The last couple times, they've been crispy, and I've been getting mad as well.

[A]

Give me your order. Come over to the house.

[C]

Yeah, the main one that make them crisp be. If you want, is the one right there off that I go to off of Van Eyes. And over there been Sherman.

[B]

Okay. Okay.

[C]

You go to that one.

[A]

We don't go to Sherman.

[B]

Yeah, we don't go to Sherman.

[A]

We're not allowed over there.

[B]

Yeah, Bougie.

[A]

All right, Send us off, doc, to say say bye to them.

[D]

Bye.

[C]

And we'll see you in.

[B]

Thank you for being a bad friend. A little rusty? Yeah, a little bit.

[D]

Okay.

[C]

Hey, thank you for being a bad friend. Love it.

[A]

Wait. Do this one more time. Say it again, and I'm gonna mouth it and make me do it. Ready? One, two, three.

[C]

Thank you for being the bad friends.