Bad Friends - "Fat Skinny Eyes"

Hosts: Bobby Lee & Andrew Santino
Date: December 1, 2025

Episode Overview

In this lively and wide-ranging episode, Bobby and Andrew riff on fashion trends (especially bags for men), body image hang-ups, awkward dating interactions, Hollywood dining, comedy road stories, gift-giving anxieties, and favorite soups. The conversation jumps between sharp banter and playful vulnerability, with trademark irreverence and self-deprecating humor. Fans get a window into both comics’ social insecurities and everyday obsessions, all against the backdrop of holiday season nostalgia.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Male Bag Trend

• Timestamps: 01:57 – 07:44
• Bobby defends his love of fanny packs, hilariously relaying how producer Andres made fun of his bag.
• Andrew explores the spectrum of “manly vs. femme” bags, comparing duffels, fanny packs, and purses.
• Both riff on celebrities like LeBron James, Harry Styles, and Jacob Elordi embracing purses.
  • Andrew: "A duffel bag is a man's bag. A fanny pack is bi. A purse, that's femme." (05:22)
  • Bobby: "I'm not bisexual. But fashion is life, is it not?" (05:57)
• Discussion of Yoshinobu Yamamoto (Dodgers pitcher) and his extravagant bag collection.

2. Body Image, Weight Loss, and “Fat Skinny Eyes”

• Timestamps: 07:44 – 08:36
• Bobby, having recently lost weight, admits he still sees a "fat guy" in the mirror and jokes about having "fat eyes."
• Andrew challenges Bobby on moving the goalposts for body satisfaction.
  • Bobby: “I still have fat eyes.” (07:46)
• Laughter about body dysmorphia, aging, and flat vs. dimpled butts.
  • Andrew: "Those are the dimples in your tush. That's my favorite place to bite.” (08:53)

3. Awkward Encounters & The Art of FaceTime Dating

• Timestamps: 12:06 – 20:30
• Bobby and Andrew role-play a FaceTime date, exposing Bobby's criteria for online matches.
  • Andrew (as the date): “My last boyfriend cheated on me with a yoga instructor. I became a yoga instructor.” (16:46)
• The guys explore red flags in partners (drinking, number of marriages, lots of kids, exes as NBA players).
• Discussion of long-distance attempts and why FaceTime pre-vetting matters.

4. Anxiety and Comedy Special Prep

• Timestamps: 29:00 – 31:12
• Bobby opens up about the stress of prepping his special—songwriting with Louis Katz, using holograms, and feeling unprecedented anxiety.
  • Bobby: "I've never felt this much anxiety in my life—even, like, technical things. I don't know why." (29:48)
• Andrew reassures Bobby about trusting talented collaborators.

5. Hilarious Riffs: Sperm, Release, and Warrior Genes

• Timestamps: 31:12 – 32:52
• Bobby gets graphic about not masturbating to porn, saving his "release" for times with a partner.
• They riff on sperm as “warriors,” discuss Lee family history and referencing famed warriors named Lee.
  • Bobby: “If you look at my sperm, they're wearing helmets and little swords. They're survivors!” (31:47)

6. Hollywood Hotspots: Dantana’s and Night Market

• Timestamps: 25:26 – 42:21
• The guys recall run-ins at legendary L.A. spots like Dantana’s, where Bobby is now recognized and even kissed by the host.
  • Bobby: "Now, like, they kiss me on the cheeks and stuff." (40:11)
• Andrew teases Bobby about his bag and their contrasting food tastes, promoting Night Market as a better alternative.
• Reflections on feeling excluded or ignored in elite L.A. settings (and whether it’s race or looks).

7. Gifts, Friendship, and Holidays

• Timestamps: 63:38 – 69:17
• The hosts stress over finding the perfect Christmas presents for each other.
• They negotiate whether to stop exchanging gifts and joke about extravagant wishes (Gucci chains, cars, loofahs, a Toto Japanese toilet).
  • Andrew: "I'd rather buy you a new car than eat food with you." (69:12)
• Heartfelt wishes to make a real movie together in the coming year.

8. Soup Season and Food Critique

• Timestamps: 51:02 – 57:02
• Ecstatic celebration of soup season, with an earnest reveal of favorite (and least favorite) soups.
  • Andrew: “It’s soup season, dog. That crisp air—if you can see your breath in LA, it’s soup season.” (51:03)
• Bobby loves Tom Yum, jigga stews, and clam chowder; Andrew can’t stand matzo ball soup.
• The duo bond over breakfast at The Griddle and the spectacle of fruity pebble French toast.

9. Comedy, Sketch Shows, and Limitations

• Timestamps: 57:02 – 58:35
• Bobby reflects on his time in sketch comedy, expressing insecurity about his skills.
• Andrew insists Bobby’s “eyes” are his comedic tell—but also his acting limitation.
  • Andrew: “You do characters, but you have to physically change your eyes.” (58:10)

10. Frankenstein’s Monster & Pop Culture Gripings

• Timestamps: 58:35 – 61:07
• The guys debate the confusion around Frankenstein vs. Frankenstein’s Monster and societal misnaming.
  • Andrew: “Like on a Halloween shirt, it'll say Frankenstein. Why didn’t they just give the monster the name Frankenstein?” (59:53)
• Brief chat about film releases ("Now You See Me") and Andrew’s role.

11. Memorable TikTok – The Red House Furniture Ad

• Timestamps: 48:04 – 50:13
• Bobby shares a nostalgic 90s local furniture ad that seems about racial harmony—until Andrew reveals it’s a comedy sketch.
• Bobby is adorably embarrassed, but Andrew reassures him: “Your innocence is good because it is a good commercial.” (50:12)

Notable Quotes & Moments

• “I still have fat eyes.” – Bobby (07:46)
• “A duffel bag is a male. A fanny pack—that is a little femme leaning. And then a purse, that’s a straight up purse… Harry Styles with a purse.” – Andrew (05:22)
• “If you look at my sperm, they're wearing helmets and little swords. They're survivors!” – Bobby (31:47)
• “That crisp air—if you can see your breath in LA, it's soup season.” – Andrew (51:03)
• “I'd rather buy you a new car than eat food with you.” – Andrew (69:12)
• “I'm not bisexual. But fashion is life, is it not?” – Bobby (05:57)

Timestamps for Key Segments

• Male bag fashion: 01:57–07:44
• Body image & ‘fat eyes’: 07:44–08:36
• FaceTime dating roleplay: 12:06–20:30
• Comedy special anxiety: 29:00–31:12
• Hologram dad bit: 29:00–29:48
• Sperm and warrior genes riff: 31:12–32:52
• Hollywood dining & Dantana’s: 25:26–42:21
• Gifts episode & friendship: 63:38–69:17
• Soup season rhapsody: 51:02–57:02
• Acting & ‘eyes’ limitation: 57:02–58:35
• Frankenstein debate: 58:35–61:07
• “Red House” TikTok: 48:04–50:13

Tone & Final Impressions

This episode is classic Bad Friends: rambling, affectionate, irreverently honest, and punctuated by escalating bits and inside jokes. Both hosts ping-pong between deep vulnerability (body image, aging, dating fears) and merciless mockery (of each other and pop culture at large). Listeners get a little wisdom about trusting collaborators, a lot of laughs, and a holiday reminder that, even if your eyes are still “fat," you deserve soup and a friend who remembers your birthday—if only to hassle you about what gift to give.