Fireballs Of Hate Flame

Summary

Podcast Summary: Bad Friends – Episode "Fireballs Of Hate Flame"

Hosts: Bobby Lee & Andrew Santino
Production: A 7EQUIS Production
Title: Fireballs Of Hate Flame
Knowledge Cutoff: October 2023

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1. Live Show Recap and Promotions (00:00 - 02:20)

The episode begins with Bobby Lee and Andrew Santino discussing their recent live show, "Scary Times USA." Both express enthusiasm and pride over the performance, highlighting it as one of their best and strongest shows to date.

Notable Quotes:

• Andrew Santino [00:18]: “Probably one of the best I've ever done.”
• Bobby Lee [00:20]: “Strongest we've ever done.”

They inform listeners that those who missed the live event can watch an edited version available at Moment Co. Additionally, they promote exclusive merchandise related to the show, emphasizing the limited availability with only 18 days left for purchases.

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2. Pop Culture and Youth Awareness (02:07 - 08:20)

Bobby and Andrew transition into a discussion about generational differences in movie familiarity, specifically referencing the cult classic "Soylent Green." They ponder whether younger audiences, particularly those born around the year 2000, are aware of such films and their iconic twists.

Notable Quotes:

• Bobby Lee [02:07]: “Kids born in 2000, a 24-year-old doesn't know.”
• Andrew Santino [02:13]: “I just feel like that's a part of...”

The conversation humorously touches on how modern content consumption, especially through platforms like YouTube, leads viewers to react unpredictably to classic movie moments they might not fully understand.

---

3. Firefighter Benefit Show Experience (04:00 - 12:00)

The hosts recount their experience attending a firefighter benefit show at the Improv, featuring stand-up performances by local firefighters. They share amusing anecdotes about the performers' varied comedic styles and the unique atmosphere of the event.

Notable Quotes:

• Andrew Santino [04:29]: “They're always handing out buckets. They need money, these guys.”
• Bobby Lee [06:08]: “One after another. I'm not kidding you.”

Bobby humorously describes himself stalling on stage with antics like pretending to poke himself, while Andrew commends his resilience, teasing him about ultimately not being "broken" despite the challenges.

Notable Quotes:

• Andrew Santino [08:52]: “Yeah. You never will.”
• Bobby Lee [08:54]: “I will.”

They also discuss the logistics of firefighting, including the integration of paramedics in fire crews, highlighting the multifaceted roles firefighters often play.

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4. Friendships and Poway High School Hall of Fame (14:00 - 45:00)

A significant portion of the episode delves into the dynamics of friendship between Bobby, Andrew, and their friend Carlos. The conversation touches on the misconception that Andrew is part of his high school's Hall of Fame, leading to a deeper exploration of their personal histories and achievements.

Notable Quotes:

• Bobby Lee [17:09]: “You're already breaking so many of the.”
• Andrew Santino [17:17]: “You live in a house bigger than 99.9% of the houses in the world. Can we say that?”

Bobby lists his accomplishments, including hosting the "TigerBelly" podcast, acting in the culturally iconic sketch show "Sex and the Six," and appearing in various television shows such as "Magnum P.I." and "Hawaii Five-O." He rhetorically asks why these achievements haven't secured him a place in the Hall of Fame, suggesting a perceived lack of recognition.

Notable Quotes:

• Bobby Lee [44:37]: “I have two very popular podcasts...”
• Andrew Santino [45:14]: “You have the most friends, right?”

The hosts engage in playful but pointed banter about each other's social lives, professional endeavors, and the authenticity of their friendships. The tension escalates as they confront each other's behaviors and perceived shortcomings, leading to a heated exchange.

Notable Quotes:

• Bobby Lee [57:06]: “I don't have bully tactics.”
• Andrew Santino [58:20]: “You're skating on thin ice.”

Carlos attempts to mediate, expressing remorse over past conflicts and hinting at internal struggles, which further fuels the hosts' frustrations. The conversation reveals underlying tensions and feelings of being undervalued or misunderstood within their friendship circle.

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5. Internal Grievances and Resolutions (45:00 - 70:58)

The episode intensifies as Bobby and Andrew air out personal grievances, exposing vulnerabilities and frustrations that have built up over time. Carlos becomes a pivotal figure in this segment, attempting to clear the air and mend relationships.

Notable Quotes:

• Bobby Lee [63:02]: “I have a very good penis. And then we'll see. Thank you for being bad friends.”
• Andrew Santino [65:35]: “That's going to his head. Are you using it to DM people?”

Their back-and-forth includes humorous jabs, sincere apologies, and the acknowledgment of their mutual support despite conflicts. Bobby reflects on his high school experiences, emphasizing how they shaped his resilience and determination, while Andrew counters by highlighting Bobby's significant contributions and achievements.

Notable Quotes:

• Bobby Lee [62:25]: “I saw the writing on the wall. I see the Matrix and it's again stacked up against me.”
• Andrew Santino [65:22]: “You have to fight back.”

By the episode's conclusion, there's a sense of reconciliation as they recognize each other's strengths and the importance of their partnership in "Bad Friends." Despite the confrontations, the underlying theme underscores the complexity of friendships in the public eye, balancing personal grievances with professional camaraderie.

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Conclusion

"Fireballs Of Hate Flame" serves as a candid exploration of Bobby Lee and Andrew Santino's friendship, interwoven with humorous anecdotes, personal reflections, and the candid airing of internal conflicts. The episode effectively captures the essence of their dynamic—balancing camaraderie with competitive banter—while offering listeners an unfiltered glimpse into their personal and professional lives.

Notable Quotes:

• Bobby Lee [68:30]: “You speaking your mind.”
• Andrew Santino [70:48]: “Submitting an injury claim with Morgan and Morgan is very, very simple.”

Through this episode, listeners gain insight into the challenges and triumphs of maintaining a creative partnership, the impact of past experiences on present relationships, and the unwavering dedication to their podcast and live shows.

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Relevant Links and Promotions:

• Live Show Tickets: Moment Co - Bad Friends
• Bad Friends Social Media:
  • Instagram
  • Patreon
  • TikTok
  • Official Website
• Andrew Santino:
  • Instagram
  • Twitter
  • YouTube
• Bobby Lee:
  • Instagram
  • Twitter
  • Subscribe to TigerBelly

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Note: This summary excludes commercial segments and focuses solely on the episode's content and key discussions.

Transcript

[Bobby Lee]

This episode of Bad Friends is presented and fueled by Huell Your go to.

[Andrew Santino]

For complete nutrition, try Huell with 15% off today using code bad friends at my.huell.com Bad friends.

[Bobby Lee]

Hey, scary time USA.

[Andrew Santino]

Scaredy time USA.

[Bobby Lee]

You guys, if you guys missed that live, you missed out because it was.

[Andrew Santino]

Probably one of the best I've ever done.

[Bobby Lee]

Strongest we've ever done.

[Andrew Santino]

I think it felt so cool.

[Bobby Lee]

It felt cool.

[Andrew Santino]

And right now you can still watch it. You didn't get to see it live. It's not going to be as beautiful when it's not live, but you can still watch a edited cut of most of almost everything that we did on there.

[Bobby Lee]

Yep.

[Andrew Santino]

At Moment Co slash Bad Friends. Scary Time usa. There's also got a one off shirts, hoodies, posters, stuff like that on the site that we're going to stop selling after scary times USA is gone. So 18 days left from right now is all you got. Go to Moment Co slash Bad Friends.

[Bobby Lee]

Hey.

[Andrew Santino]

We'Re going to be Dan under my. Listen, we added shows and you guys have done such a great job coming out and see us that we had to add shows. So Sydney, uh, we got a couple of shows. We're doing Brisbane, Auckland, Melbourne, a couple of shows.

[Bobby Lee]

Adelaide.

[Andrew Santino]

Adelaide, Perth, Australia. And then finally Single Boy Singapore. If you want to come see us in any of those spots, you better get your tickets right now. They're going to sell bad friends pod.com bad friends podcast.

[Bobby Lee]

What a joy. We're never going to. We may never even be a long time.

[Andrew Santino]

We probably might not come back together.

[Bobby Lee]

Who knows?

[Andrew Santino]

All right, you two are bad friends. Who are these two idiots?

[Bobby Lee]

White dude and an Asian dude. You two are disgusting. You two or something. We're Bad friends. You know what I've been watching is people. Kids watching six cents for the first time. How do you like not know the outcome of that movie?

[Andrew Santino]

Well, if kids were people that were born in the year like 2000, a 24 year old doesn't know.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, sometimes I feel like that's something that they, you know, it's like, you know, Soylent Green are people. Do you remember that?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Like I never even saw and green. But I know soil and green are people.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, but 99 this movie came out. Okay, so kids born in 2000, 2001, young 20 year olds, they wouldn't have seen this, but.

[Bobby Lee]

No, I'm saying they haven't seen it. But would they know the, you know, I mean the bit that the switch.

[Andrew Santino]

Right. Maybe the surprise.

[Bobby Lee]

I just feel like that's a part of. But when you watch YouTubers or people watching it, they get really. Oh, is he. You know what? I would. I don't want to give it away, but they're. They get freaked out. You see black dudes, too, especially. It's always, you know, I mean, they got. No.

[Andrew Santino]

By the way.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You know, we've reached peak Internet. What? Someone literally sent this to me yesterday. I came up. I didn't text Carlos. You know how black dudes will get high and watch comedy stuff?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

There's two black guys that got high to watch Bad Friends. No, I was like, we made it.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't even watch it.

[Andrew Santino]

We made it.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't even want to watch it because they laugh.

[Andrew Santino]

Get high and watch us.

[Bobby Lee]

Do they watch?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Do they laugh?

[Andrew Santino]

They were dying.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

That made me feel so cool. That's like when a black guy calls you the N word. You know what I mean? And you're like, all right, I'll take.

[Bobby Lee]

It because I did a firefighter show.

[Andrew Santino]

You did a firefighter show? What did you say? A firefighter show. What you think I said a firefighter show?

[Bobby Lee]

I said firefighter show.

[Andrew Santino]

It sounds the same.

[Bobby Lee]

No, slow it down.

[Andrew Santino]

Do it one more time.

[Bobby Lee]

I did a firefighter show.

[Andrew Santino]

Firefighter show.

[Bobby Lee]

That's not what I said. And that's what.

[Andrew Santino]

Firefighter show. Bro.

[Bobby Lee]

Bro. Bro. Come on, dude.

[Andrew Santino]

It's a firefighter show.

[Bobby Lee]

Right?

[Andrew Santino]

Go ahead.

[Bobby Lee]

Ryo was there.

[Andrew Santino]

Fireball.

[Bobby Lee]

Is that what he says?

[Andrew Santino]

Wait, what is it how you can.

[Bobby Lee]

No. In Street Fighter. Is it Street Fighter? Yeah, Street Fighter.

[Andrew Santino]

Street Fighter. Hadoken. Hadoken.

[Bobby Lee]

That's what he said. Hadouken. Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

It's Harukin.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

Harukin. Wave Motion or Fist of Surge. Special attack from Capcom. Street Fighter.

[Bobby Lee]

Anyway, sorry.

[Andrew Santino]

So you're at a firefighter show.

[Bobby Lee]

Am I saying it right?

[Andrew Santino]

I think so.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. A fire fireman show. Yeah.

[Carlos]

That's gay.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Sounds like a.

[Bobby Lee]

That's gay.

[Andrew Santino]

Little gay burlesque show.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

We're gonna put you out.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, well, then forget it.

[Andrew Santino]

No, come on.

[Bobby Lee]

I mean, I don't want to partake anymore.

[Andrew Santino]

You were at a firefight?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah. Oh, God. It's a dead end, huh?

[Andrew Santino]

Not at the Firefire show. Your ends always open.

[Bobby Lee]

So I see. So it was a benefit show at the Improv, and it was. So it was me, Griffin. Right. Amir K. And Fitzsimmons.

[Andrew Santino]

I love Amir. I love Fitz.

[Bobby Lee]

Fits. Right?

[Andrew Santino]

And Griff. I love Griff.

[Bobby Lee]

Right. But the first part of the show was Firefighters Doing stand up.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, like local LA department.

[Bobby Lee]

Yes. Yeah. And they had about eight of them.

[Andrew Santino]

It was to raise money for these guys.

[Bobby Lee]

It was like some sort of benefit for fire people.

[Andrew Santino]

What is going on with this? They're always handing out buckets. They need money, these guys. What's going on with these guys?

[Bobby Lee]

Dude, fighting fire is expensive.

[Andrew Santino]

They're never doing it.

[Bobby Lee]

Water you need. What else do you need?

[Andrew Santino]

They're never fighting.

[Bobby Lee]

Just water.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, you gotta have a dog. You gotta.

[Bobby Lee]

You need the Dalmatian.

[Andrew Santino]

You do?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. For optics, right?

[Andrew Santino]

No, they go.

[Bobby Lee]

Maybe the shiny red, you know? Yeah, the fire. You gotta shine that up.

[Andrew Santino]

The what? The fire truck. Yeah, it's already shy. Pre shined.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, but. So those are extra shiny.

[Andrew Santino]

See, that's why it starts to get real gay. They're in the firehouse. They're clear. They're shining it up all day with their shirts off. They're just lifting weights.

[Bobby Lee]

They have their hoses out.

[Andrew Santino]

There's. There's a pole.

[Bobby Lee]

There's a pole. They're raising money in a floor glory hole.

[Andrew Santino]

A floor.

[Bobby Lee]

Gigantic milking table.

[Carlos]

With earth.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, kind of.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Carlos]

No, you do that like on a beach you can lay.

[Bobby Lee]

I have no idea what you're saying.

[Andrew Santino]

Continue the story.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

Anyway, don't give him too much air time.

[Bobby Lee]

So, you know, I went early. We all went early. And number one, they killed.

[Andrew Santino]

No way.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, one after another. I'm not kidding you.

[Andrew Santino]

Who was in the crowd? People whose houses were on fire.

[Bobby Lee]

No, no, no, no. No other fire people.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, it was all fire people.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, it's all firemen.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, that's why they.

[Bobby Lee]

No, but. No, but they were actually. Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

Like, who wrote the jokes for them?

[Bobby Lee]

I don't know. And they all had different point of views. They all went. It got to the point though, dude, where me, Griffin and Amir were standing there and we all were holding each other, going, what if we bomb? It would be because we're. We're supposed to be the pros. Yeah, right. So then Eric goes up there. He does good. I'm next. Right? And I don't know why I brought this up. Because you brought up the two. Two black guys watching, right? And this dude. This black dude had shades on. You know how sometimes they get Martin Lawrence Y.

[Andrew Santino]

100%.

[Bobby Lee]

You know what I mean? Like, they get like. Like bitony. Yeah, like, you know me. They just get all. Hold on. Just get all. Like, where am I? You know what I mean?

[Andrew Santino]

What are you talking about? Dude? They get all. I was with you with Martin Lawrence. You lost me.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't. No, he was an older black guy, right? He's wearing, like, a brown track suit. He was wearing shades, and he was just kind of going, where am I? You know?

[Andrew Santino]

Was he on stage?

[Bobby Lee]

No, he was off to the side. Okay. You know how you go down the stairs? He was sitting there with shades with a beautiful. His wife.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, you.

[Bobby Lee]

I mean, but they're older, and he also. They like to. I don't say they. That's insane. That's insane what I'm doing.

[Andrew Santino]

I know what you were saying.

[Bobby Lee]

No, no, no. Yeah, but, you know, he had, like, one leg on something like this. Like this. Like this.

[Andrew Santino]

As if he was in a park.

[Bobby Lee]

On a bench drinking lemonade in a nice summer day.

[Andrew Santino]

And you know what color it is? It's pink.

[Bobby Lee]

It's purple.

[Andrew Santino]

It's pink.

[Bobby Lee]

It's grape.

[Andrew Santino]

They. Black people love pink lemonade.

[Bobby Lee]

They do.

[Andrew Santino]

The way that we love Arnold Palmer.

[Bobby Lee]

So this guy, right? I was observing him.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

He was dying, laughing at every fireman. Okay, okay.

[Andrew Santino]

He was a fireman himself.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't know. I didn't ask him. He must have, you know, and he was laughing. But then when I went up, ice cold, ice cold like a river.

[Andrew Santino]

Nothing.

[Bobby Lee]

Nothing.

[Andrew Santino]

Not a smile, not a smirk.

[Bobby Lee]

Not a wimp. He almost looked mad. When I'm. When I get nervous.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

And I have to do well, I start getting real weird fast up front.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, I know.

[Bobby Lee]

I mean, I make my hair weird.

[Andrew Santino]

But I like it.

[Bobby Lee]

I stumble on stage like a character, you know what I mean? And I just start going, beep, beep, beep, beep. You know what I mean? You know what I mean? Poking my pee pee. You know what I mean? Like, I literally go, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep. Like that, right? And media's like, nah, nah, he didn't like that. I crushed still, but still, he. I couldn't break him.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. You never will.

[Bobby Lee]

I will.

[Andrew Santino]

No, you will not. One day I will, sir. Wherever you are.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Come back to a show, sir. Let's see if we can really crack you.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Anyway, do you know how much money they raised for firefighters?

[Bobby Lee]

I didn't ask.

[Andrew Santino]

My grandfather was a firefighter, you know that. I've talked to him over the years, and I said, you know, cops get a lot of, like, flack. You know, Cops are always. They're always like, cops are racist, you know? This is a lot of flack. People say.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't know about that.

[Andrew Santino]

You never heard this?

[Bobby Lee]

Never Heard that.

[Andrew Santino]

Good. But I think it's interesting that people always say, like, oh, cops are racist. All the cops are bad. All cops are racist. Firefighters, never. No one ever says that about them.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't think they are.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, they are.

[Bobby Lee]

They are. I'll tell you. Can I give you a theory? Maybe.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, dude. They're just stronger cops.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Imagine it's a job that you have.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

When only one specific event happens.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Right. So there could be a month that goes by. No.

[Andrew Santino]

Or like, you're a robbery.

[Bobby Lee]

Is there a fire every day?

[Andrew Santino]

No.

[Bobby Lee]

Right. So what I'm saying is that I assume months go by. They rescue cats from trees. They do. But fuck you. All right.

[Andrew Santino]

176 fire stations exist now. How many fires are there in the United States?

[Bobby Lee]

No, but in la.

[Andrew Santino]

In la, I will say this out every day. Look at this. Approximately 17,000 fires in the city. That also includes, like, small shop front fire. That's.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

That's not a big. That's not exactly. Not real.

[Bobby Lee]

Not unreal.

[Andrew Santino]

Arson. That includes arson.

[Bobby Lee]

Arson. So 46 a day also. Then they. They're always working.

[Andrew Santino]

They're probably pretty busy. Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. Well, then my theory's wrong. I always assume, like, you know, they're just playing, like, Jenga up there in the firehouse. You know what I mean? And then. Oh, man. You know what I mean? I don't know why I said it like that, but, like, oh, man. Fire. Let's go. And they go down the pool.

[Andrew Santino]

They have way more medical emergencies in the West Hollywood Fire Department. That's all. Medical emergency.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, that's what they. Because we. I used to. You know, we used to.

[Andrew Santino]

Because when you get something stuck up your ass, they got to be there for all that.

[Bobby Lee]

No, Kalil used to get heart murmurs.

[Andrew Santino]

No, I get them all the time.

[Bobby Lee]

And then we call the ambulance.

[Andrew Santino]

No, I don't do that.

[Bobby Lee]

And a fire truck would come. Sometimes they have to.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, they come.

[Bobby Lee]

Why, though?

[Andrew Santino]

Why what?

[Bobby Lee]

Why the fire truck with the ambulance?

[Andrew Santino]

They want to show off their big ladder? No, they have. I think it's part of the. It's a. Part of. It's required that they have to show up with it with paramedics because in case someone's stuck in something or who knows? Well, here, let's get the answer from this woman. The goal is to get help who needs it, as fast as possible. Ambulances can be delayed or unavailable at the time because paramedics also are EMT. EMTs also can be firefighters or they.

[Bobby Lee]

Have to be Oh, I think you're right, because I think a couple. A couple of times. Ambulance didn't come. It was only a firefighter.

[Andrew Santino]

But he had.

[Bobby Lee]

But he had all the equipment.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, he had the experience and they had that.

[Bobby Lee]

Wow. They do so many things.

[Andrew Santino]

Would she get her heart shocked back into. Into rhythm?

[Bobby Lee]

She had an ablation, so we used to. We got a couple operations on her heart. Wow.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, I get murmurs all the time.

[Bobby Lee]

Do you ever get worried about it?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Yeah, a lot.

[Bobby Lee]

Would you. Have you thought considered an ablation? You know what it is?

[Andrew Santino]

A black Asian.

[Bobby Lee]

Yes. I should have said I would consider getting a Tiger Woods.

[Andrew Santino]

That's what they call the surgery.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

No, I thought about doing something to it, but my doctors have always said it's okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I guess they go. They. It's like a little. They go through all the, like, veins and stuff on one side of the body with the. With. I don't know.

[Andrew Santino]

Usually goes through your belly button a lot. That freaks me out. They open up your belly button, you know. My wife had surgery. Did it go through your belly button?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Yuck.

[Bobby Lee]

You know how they say that one day we're gonna have chips on our arms? Will you do that?

[Andrew Santino]

Well, you.

[Bobby Lee]

All our information, our credit cards, everything, you know? I mean, you'll do it for sure.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

How convenient.

[Andrew Santino]

I would do it. You won't do that. Why'd you shake your head no?

[Bobby Lee]

That scares me.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't know why.

[Bobby Lee]

It's just like, when that starts conflicting.

[Andrew Santino]

With, like, mechanical, with human stuff. Like with brain and neural.

[Bobby Lee]

What do you mean, mechanical? I'm not saying I'm going to get my arm replaced. It's like a little chip, dude.

[Andrew Santino]

You think it's going to lead to neural link?

[Bobby Lee]

I don't even like driving cars that, like, they can turn off with a computer. That's why I drive an old Accord. Oh, my God. That's.

[Andrew Santino]

That's why you drive an old Accord.

[Bobby Lee]

Bad. And you being broken.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

This guy's.

[Andrew Santino]

Let us be me, Clint Eastwood.

[Bobby Lee]

Let us be Mean Bridges of Madison county or something. You know what I mean?

[Andrew Santino]

That's because you are broke.

[Bobby Lee]

No, what I'm saying is you have your credit card, your idea id, and also maybe a way to open up your front door with your arm.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, I like that, too. Yeah, but think about it. Somebody follows you home, they grab you, they just put your arm up to the door. The guy, he gets right.

[Bobby Lee]

Right, right, right, right, right.

[Andrew Santino]

Can't have that.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

There was a bump in the Night. The other night by the house, by the way, I got nervous, grabbed my gun.

[Bobby Lee]

In your mansion.

[Andrew Santino]

In my home.

[Bobby Lee]

Your jagged mansion. Okay, so my home is not.

[Andrew Santino]

Your house is the same size as my house.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, my God. You. I love when you try to start fights with me.

[Andrew Santino]

You just started.

[Bobby Lee]

Who started it?

[Andrew Santino]

Who started it?

[Bobby Lee]

Dude, I don't want to go there.

[Andrew Santino]

You just started it.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't want to go there with you, dude, but stop doing this. Stop lying. Stop. You know what I mean?

[Andrew Santino]

About what?

[Bobby Lee]

Gaslighting.

[Andrew Santino]

That's so. The irony of this is staggering. You're literally gas.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, it's so.

[Andrew Santino]

You know, you're literally doing it.

[Bobby Lee]

And let me say what you're doing.

[Andrew Santino]

You're gas writing. Me, so gas writing. So no more gas writing. Oh, you're.

[Bobby Lee]

Now you're doing Asian accent. That's when you're scared.

[Andrew Santino]

That's how I get out of it.

[Bobby Lee]

When he gets scared, he does Asian accent, right?

[Andrew Santino]

No, you have your mom.

[Bobby Lee]

You got scared and you did my mom.

[Andrew Santino]

You brought an accent. Okay, that's what you.

[Bobby Lee]

That's.

[Andrew Santino]

And it makes viral.

[Bobby Lee]

But my point being is that you scared right now and calm.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm not scared.

[Bobby Lee]

Calm down. Calm down.

[Andrew Santino]

You started it. That's an insane thing.

[Bobby Lee]

Did you guys go to the house?

[Andrew Santino]

Yes, they've all been in my home.

[Bobby Lee]

Whose house is bigger?

[Carlos]

They're honestly the same. If you add up the driveway and everything.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, you're going to put my driveway in it? I have a long driveway. How is that an equation?

[Carlos]

That's included.

[Bobby Lee]

That's not a living space.

[Andrew Santino]

Thank you. It could be.

[Bobby Lee]

No, it's not. So my point is, is this. Okay, let me reiterate and let me resay it, because the first time I went to his house was during his birthday party.

[Andrew Santino]

Right. My old house.

[Bobby Lee]

The new one.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't want to start a fight with you, but I.

[Andrew Santino]

You're doing it.

[Bobby Lee]

I know, but I walked in and I remember going, oh, I might have to move. That's the first thought.

[Andrew Santino]

What do you mean? Because you.

[Bobby Lee]

That's because. Let me. I want to be honest with you, dude.

[Andrew Santino]

Sure.

[Bobby Lee]

All right. I went to your front lawn. Pretty good. Nice lawn.

[Andrew Santino]

Thanks.

[Bobby Lee]

You have a gate and the whole thing.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Electrical, you know, gate system. Right. You walked out of these gigantic doors. Not that your house is big, but you have gigantic doors.

[Andrew Santino]

It's a big door. I'm six one.

[Bobby Lee]

Right, Right.

[Andrew Santino]

I mean, all doors are big to you.

[Bobby Lee]

Right. Okay, you can make fun of me all you want, but I'm just. I'm trying to be honest with you.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, I'm also trying to put comedy in the show.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. Okay. And so then you come on in. Lang mang or whatever you fucking. You always say. You know what I mean?

[Andrew Santino]

What?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Make something up funny. If you're gonna say that, pick it up and be fun.

[Bobby Lee]

Ling Ling or whatever.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, come on in, Ling Ling. I go, ling, Ling's here.

[Bobby Lee]

Ling Ling's here. I walk in and I remember my first thing is I looked around high school ceilings do not have high ceilings.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, they're. They're tall.

[Bobby Lee]

Very. Right.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, they're tall.

[Bobby Lee]

Right. And then I also, like. I'm like. The living room is so far away from where I am.

[Andrew Santino]

It's in the back of the house.

[Bobby Lee]

I know where it is.

[Andrew Santino]

It's in the back of the house.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. So it's like, you know, my site isn't that bad, Right? Your house. You have to go up to the living room. You can also not see it.

[Andrew Santino]

Thank you. You have to walk upstairs to your living room and your house.

[Bobby Lee]

Min. 2 studio apartments on top of each other. Yeah. You went up there.

[Andrew Santino]

They have bedrooms. Thank you, McCone.

[Bobby Lee]

No, I will admit that my house is. I prefer the design of my house better than yours.

[Andrew Santino]

Sure. That's why you live there.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

With cat all over the place. It's great.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. You can make jokes.

[Andrew Santino]

That's the show that we're on.

[Bobby Lee]

I know you can do what you're doing right now, dude. And I'm fine with it because I'm just being honest with you. So I walk in, high ceilings. I go, I don't know where? The living room, but it's pretty far away, probably half a mile away. And I walked in there and then I went. My thought was I might have to at least get a house comparable to this because I want to feel like we're on the same level. But I remember having these thoughts. And why would I have these thoughts? Carlos, do you think you're breaking the tenth commandment?

[Carlos]

It's jealousy.

[Bobby Lee]

Exactly, dude.

[Andrew Santino]

What is that?

[Bobby Lee]

It's jealousy.

[Andrew Santino]

Thou shalt not cover. Covet thy neighbor, dude.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Don't covet.

[Bobby Lee]

So I was coveting you, dude.

[Andrew Santino]

Stop coveting me.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm going to cover before the rest of my life.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't want you to.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, dude. I'm covet king.

[Andrew Santino]

You're already breaking so many of the.

[Bobby Lee]

Here's what it is. You live in a house bigger than 99.9% of the houses in the. In the world. Can we say that?

[Andrew Santino]

Well, the world. Yeah, yeah. Most people live in huts.

[Bobby Lee]

Exactly. So that I'm not be lying.

[Andrew Santino]

Not bigger than 99% of the United States.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

No, it's not.

[Bobby Lee]

Let's move on. So what are we gonna say?

[Andrew Santino]

It's not even like, what.

[Bobby Lee]

Let's move on. What are you gonna say?

[Andrew Santino]

Well, if you let me tell the story. That's not it.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, let me finish my little point.

[Andrew Santino]

Here, because there was a gunshot outside.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. It could have been in there.

[Andrew Santino]

And then there was rustling next door.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. Like continuously.

[Andrew Santino]

And then I got worried.

[Bobby Lee]

All right, so start.

[Andrew Santino]

So I grabbed my.

[Bobby Lee]

Start from the beginning.

[Andrew Santino]

Go. There was a.

[Bobby Lee]

You're in your mansion going. Yeah. So you're laying. That you're laying down.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, I'm in one of my hyperbaric chambers that I sleep in. Yeah. No, So I was in my money room.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And I was sleeping. I have a money room that I.

[Bobby Lee]

Know you sleep in.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, yeah. And I was swimming, actually, I was taking a late night Scrooge McDuck swim. I have gold coins.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, you have a moat.

[Andrew Santino]

It's a 30 foot pool of money.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

No, I'm sleeping. I hear a gunshot. I panic. Then there's a text stream between our neighbors. Did anybody hear that? Who heard the blah, blah, blah? You know, like there's a. So then I'm really like on edge. So then I grab my gun and I go downstairs.

[Bobby Lee]

You have a gun?

[Andrew Santino]

In my underwear.

[Bobby Lee]

You have a gun. Be real.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

What kind?

[Andrew Santino]

I have a Glock.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. So you grab my gun. Your Glock.

[Andrew Santino]

I bring my gun downstairs.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And I walk outside. That's me. That's what I look like from American History X.

[Bobby Lee]

Yes.

[Andrew Santino]

And I was outside scanning around for the noises that I was hearing because I was hearing noises then after the shot. So I thought, can you.

[Bobby Lee]

Can you.

[Andrew Santino]

Someone's on the run from the cops in my mind, and they're jumping into yards. That's my biggest fear, is someone tries to like break into your house.

[Bobby Lee]

This happened last night?

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, no. This is like four nights ago.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. So I was with somebody in my house.

[Andrew Santino]

What?

[Bobby Lee]

Same thing?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. And this person that was in my house, a young lady, you mean?

[Andrew Santino]

Obviously.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. She goes, is there always a helicopter above your house? This is four nights ago.

[Andrew Santino]

And then you're saying, I'm rich. You used to have a helicopter waiting for you at all hours of the night.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't own it. I don't own it. It just takes me to the common.

[Andrew Santino]

Ready to go?

[Bobby Lee]

Takes me to the common center. No, there was literally a helicopter doing a circle in my neighbor with the spotlight.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, that. Hate a dude panic.

[Bobby Lee]

So what I'm saying, it could have been the same night that you heard the gunshot. Because we live five lifts away from each other.

[Andrew Santino]

Yes, that's true.

[Bobby Lee]

So this could be connected.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay. So I didn't hear a helicopter. I'm scared. It's quiet outside. There's rustling and banging. And I'm nervous, right? And I'm very scared because I think this is how I die. She's fine. I'll get killed.

[Bobby Lee]

Is your wife sleeping?

[Andrew Santino]

She's wide awake. She's scared because we both heard it. And then of course I'm out there and rustling, rustling. I go peek around the corner. Oh, it's just a raccoon on a garbage can. That's it.

[Bobby Lee]

How did he shot?

[Andrew Santino]

He had a gun. A little raccoon with a gun.

[Bobby Lee]

I see. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And he was just trying to get food.

[Bobby Lee]

I think you're lying.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, I am.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I feel like you're lying.

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, but it did. There was a loud rustle. It did scare the.

[Bobby Lee]

But what time was it? I'm being real because I remember going, what is going on in our neighborhood?

[Andrew Santino]

Had it been not super late, but like, I mean, I'm not early in the morning. Maybe like 1am it wasn't that. It was like I just had started to fall asleep just after midnight.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm so glad you brought that up because it just brought up another thing that I have a problem with you about. Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

Today. All day today.

[Bobby Lee]

All day today. It kind of made me mad.

[Andrew Santino]

Can somebody draw a raccoon with a gun for the show?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, please.

[Andrew Santino]

On a trash can.

[Bobby Lee]

Blue Chew. Oh my God. I mean, I ran out of Blue Chew and I was panicking because I really need it. You know, I'm a 53 year old man and I'm sexually active.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

And I'm going to tell you something, dude. You know, it's so funny. You can take Blue Chew and then three hours can go by and it's still there.

[Andrew Santino]

It's just waiting. Look at this. It's just. It's like hanging out in the brush, waiting.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like a raccoon.

[Andrew Santino]

And then when you're ready, the gun.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, that's right. That's right. Bluechew is a unique online service that delivers the same active ingredients as Viagra, Cialis and Levitra. But at a fraction of the cause and in a chewable form.

[Andrew Santino]

The process is so easy. And by the way, for all the men out there that are like, I don't know about that. I don't know how I feel about it. Do yourself a favor. Bobby has been hard as a. I'm hard now, Rock.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I'm hard now.

[Andrew Santino]

The process is simple. Sign [e-mail], consult one of their licensed medical providers, and once you're approved, you're gonna receive your prescription within days. Bluetooth tablets are also made where? Usa. Right here at home, baby. And they're prepared and shipped directly to your door. Discreet, by the way, so no one needs to know. You don't gotta go to a pharmacy. Take them anytime, day or night. Bobby likes to take them in the.

[Bobby Lee]

Day and night and in the morning.

[Andrew Santino]

Plan ahead or be ready whenever an opportunity arises.

[Bobby Lee]

Bluechew wants to help you have better sex. Discover your [e-mail] and we got a.

[Andrew Santino]

Special deal for our listeners. Try BlueChew free when you use the promo code Bad Friends at checkout. Just pay $5 for shipping. That's bluechew.com promo code bad friends to receive your first month free.

[Bobby Lee]

Visit bluechew.com for more details and important safety information. And we thank BlueChew for sponsoring the podcast DraftKings Sportsbook.

[Andrew Santino]

The NBA is finally back.

[Bobby Lee]

It's my favorite sport. Here's a way to get even more into this action. Following your favorite players playing pick six.

[Andrew Santino]

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[Bobby Lee]

And for all first time pick six players, check this out. New customers play $5 and get $50 in pick six credits.

[Andrew Santino]

That's incredible. Download the DraftKings pick six app now and use Code Bad Friends. That's Code Bad Friends for new Customers to play $5 and get $50 in Pick 6 credits.

[Bobby Lee]

Only on DraftKings Pick 6.

[Andrew Santino]

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[Bobby Lee]

You know how much money I've saved this year?

[Andrew Santino]

A ton.

[Bobby Lee]

Why?

[Andrew Santino]

Because of Rocket Money.

[Bobby Lee]

Because I have so many subscriptions on my phone and stuff and I even aware of it, they're like, it's a variety of like, you know, like ambiance sound apps or games or VPN this and this and that, whatever, whatever. And it's like it's called condensed. And now I'm saving hundreds and hundreds of dollars.

[Andrew Santino]

It's amazing because Rocket Money is a personal finance app that helps find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings. You like money, don't you?

[Bobby Lee]

See all of your subscriptions in one place and know exactly where your money is going. For any you don't want anymore, Rocket Money can help you cancel them with a few taps.

[Andrew Santino]

It's so easy and they show it to you right in front of your face. You'll be surprised at how much money you're wasting. Rocket Money has over 5 million users, including me. And Bob has saved a total of 500 million in canceled subscriptions, saving members up to $740 a year. When using all of the app's features, it's so simple. You can create a personalized budget with custom categories to keep your spending on track to get you right to the place you need to be. Because the end of the year is coming and you want money for the holidays.

[Bobby Lee]

Stop wasting money on things you don't use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to.

[Andrew Santino]

RocketMoney.com BadFriends that's RocketMoney.com BadFriends RocketMoney.com BadFends.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I feel like you and I are best friends, right?

[Andrew Santino]

You're my best friend.

[Bobby Lee]

One of my best friends.

[Andrew Santino]

You're my best friend.

[Bobby Lee]

I have a couple.

[Andrew Santino]

You're the only one for me.

[Bobby Lee]

No, I know you have a couple.

[Andrew Santino]

Name one.

[Bobby Lee]

Charlie Day.

[Andrew Santino]

That's not my best friend. He's a buddy. You're my best friend anyway.

[Bobby Lee]

And we share things.

[Andrew Santino]

Yes.

[Bobby Lee]

Fluids.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Right. Ideas. Also our loves and dislikes.

[Andrew Santino]

That's true.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. And I don't like it when you hoard things, though.

[Andrew Santino]

What did I keep from you?

[Bobby Lee]

I'm going to tell you in a second, okay? Okay. I don't like it when you hoard things and I draw the line Here.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. Don't do that.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, what is it?

[Bobby Lee]

Don't do that with your fucking nose.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, that's why I get nervous.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay? So I was at the Comedy Store the other night maybe a week ago, and Brett Moran goes, there's a great restaurant. Okay. And I go, really? And he goes, I think it's, you know, rivals, like the best way. You're smiling.

[Andrew Santino]

I know what it is.

[Bobby Lee]

I know exactly what it is. I know you know.

[Andrew Santino]

All right.

[Bobby Lee]

I know you know. Okay. Okay. So he said, it's Blvd. On Ventura.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

I had no idea about it. Right, right. So in my mind, I'm, you know, I'm on a date. We go make reservations. I sit down and the waiter comes up to me and the manager, and they go, finally. And I go, finally what? They go, well, Andrew comes here twice a week. Stop, stop. This is the fucking truth. And I'm telling you the truth. And I don't like it when people laugh at truelism.

[Andrew Santino]

It's insane.

[Bobby Lee]

It's not insane.

[Andrew Santino]

Twice a week.

[Bobby Lee]

Twice a week. And we were wondering when you're going to come in here. Right? And I went, yeah, like, how many?

[Andrew Santino]

That's.

[Bobby Lee]

They go, a lot. He comes in a lot.

[Andrew Santino]

No, he doesn't.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm going to tell you why this is true. Okay. In a second. Okay. They go, okay. Wow. You never really ever mentioned it. Right. And then the food's great.

[Andrew Santino]

It's phenomenal.

[Bobby Lee]

It's excellent.

[Andrew Santino]

Delicious.

[Bobby Lee]

It's excellent. Right?

[Andrew Santino]

Delicious.

[Bobby Lee]

And then you. I text you the menu, a picture of the menu, and I said. And you go, oh, yeah, that place is great.

[Andrew Santino]

And I said, I'm close.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. And I. Yeah, I'm close. And I go there all the time.

[Andrew Santino]

And I said, can I come over after?

[Bobby Lee]

No.

[Andrew Santino]

Yes, I did.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, maybe what I'm saying is, respond. You hoarded that restaurant.

[Andrew Santino]

I did not.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, you did. And you know what, dude?

[Andrew Santino]

This is.

[Bobby Lee]

I'll start hoarding.

[Andrew Santino]

Pissing me off, dude.

[Bobby Lee]

I'll start hoarding friend restaurants and yogurt shops and coffee shops and everything. Right. And keep secrets to myself. That's up.

[Andrew Santino]

Dude.

[Bobby Lee]

That's a great restaurant. Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

This.

[Bobby Lee]

You do it all the time.

[Andrew Santino]

Such exaggeration.

[Bobby Lee]

You do it all the time.

[Andrew Santino]

Such an exaggeration.

[Bobby Lee]

He does it all the time.

[Andrew Santino]

I've shared more than I've taken away.

[Bobby Lee]

Another one. A Mexican restaurant. He's on that.

[Carlos]

Which one?

[Bobby Lee]

I forgot what it was called. But you're like. And then. And I go to the spot or. No, What? It was Is Italian restaurant. Remember that Italian restaurant near our house?

[Andrew Santino]

Yes.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. And you go. And I were sitting there, and you go, yeah, come here. I've been coming here for years, right? And it's like two minutes from my house. I go, never heard of it.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. But first of all.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, so it's hoarding things.

[Andrew Santino]

I share more than I want. I share more than I hoard. Hey. Hey. Bobby is here saying. The manager at Boulevard Blvd. Says that I go there twice a week or I go there all the time. How many times have we gone there?

[Bobby Lee]

We've been there twice.

[Andrew Santino]

Thank you. We've only been. Was it in the same week? Same week.

[Bobby Lee]

No.

[Andrew Santino]

No. Yeah. Months apart.

[Bobby Lee]

Twice. That you're aware of. Bobby. What? Is that not the truth?

[Andrew Santino]

I've only been twice. Thank you so much.

[Bobby Lee]

Thank you. Thank you. That's bullshit.

[Andrew Santino]

In your fucking face.

[Bobby Lee]

She's always been on your side.

[Andrew Santino]

No shit.

[Bobby Lee]

In a war, she's on your side.

[Andrew Santino]

But first.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Twice a week is chaos.

[Bobby Lee]

What I want to say is I will never.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't hoard from you. And I. And I. And it's not deliberate, but I've introduced you to a lot of spots. Let's be honest. I've taken you to spots and I've gone, I think you'd like this. And he knows that's true. And you go, this is really good. Thank you for telling me. Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

But when you say I've been cutting for years, then it kind of hurts me. That's fine.

[Andrew Santino]

That place is brand new. But the Italian place was my little spot. Yes, that was.

[Bobby Lee]

You heard of that?

[Andrew Santino]

I should.

[Bobby Lee]

You admit that?

[Andrew Santino]

Fine. That's fine.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. Okay. So he does.

[Andrew Santino]

You know why?

[Bobby Lee]

All right.

[Andrew Santino]

Can I tell you why? Because I like to go alone. I used to like to go to that place alone.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

So sometimes when I was.

[Bobby Lee]

Your quiet time at a fancy Italian restaurant.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Carlos]

I've seen you eat alone.

[Andrew Santino]

Thank you.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. I have no friends.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, me fucking either. What? You're the only guy I know.

[Bobby Lee]

Do you. Hello.

[Andrew Santino]

Hello.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, my God. You are doctor friend, dude. You're professor friend, dude, dude. You have so many friends. You're the fucking guy of friends.

[Andrew Santino]

Did I go to the med school for friends?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Let me see. You're always. I'm on a golfing trip with all your friends.

[Andrew Santino]

Let me tell you, I'm alone when I walk in a room.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, my God.

[Andrew Santino]

I walk when I walk in a room.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, you guys don't back me up either. You know, he has more friends When.

[Andrew Santino]

I walk in a room, the theme song of friends comes on. That's how many friends I have. Everywhere I go, I'll be there.

[Bobby Lee]

Or cheer. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Where everybody knows your name. That's you.

[Bobby Lee]

Your cheers.

[Andrew Santino]

It is Bobby's. Bam. Bam.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You have friends.

[Bobby Lee]

That was really good. That was really good.

[Andrew Santino]

Thank you.

[Bobby Lee]

But. But also Carlos. All right, let's be. Can we be honest? Yeah.

[Carlos]

You don't hang out with a lot of people.

[Bobby Lee]

Exactly.

[Carlos]

You're just, like, on date.

[Bobby Lee]

Thank you. So, professor friend. Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

This sounds like a you thing than a me thing. And I'm your best friend. Or one of them, apparently. You don't have any fucking friends. So I'm not even your best friend. You don't even have any friends. That's more interesting.

[Bobby Lee]

You're almost there.

[Andrew Santino]

I should be there.

[Bobby Lee]

You're almost there. Dude, you change some of your behaviors.

[Andrew Santino]

What?

[Bobby Lee]

The hoarding.

[Andrew Santino]

No.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah. Open yours. Open your heart completely.

[Andrew Santino]

Name one person. Name one person on earth that's not blood to you that cares about. Cares about you the way I care about you. And.

[Bobby Lee]

Gene Hong.

[Andrew Santino]

Gene Hong. Does he check in?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. I could text you right now. I just texted me today.

[Andrew Santino]

What did he say? Today?

[Bobby Lee]

I'll show you. I'm glad you said that.

[Andrew Santino]

Bring. Bring it up. Let me see. He's your best friend.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. He goes, we. When can we do dinner and catch up?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

I said, this weekend.

[Andrew Santino]

What? He said, what's the previous text?

[Bobby Lee]

He goes. He goes, did you eat yet? I'm hungry and dumb. Already ate. I go, I am on Ozympic. And I go, I knew it. He goes, I knew it. I'm going to be the fat one in the group now. Then Saturday goes. Dinner. Didn't respond to that fat one.

[Andrew Santino]

Wait, wait, wait. The group. Oh, this is interesting. Like the group of the friends. That's interesting. That's an interesting thing to bring up. Your Honor, did you just. Interesting, interesting, interesting. The group, which means dumbfounded.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay, okay.

[Andrew Santino]

Who else is in your little group? Ali Wong. Who else in your little group?

[Bobby Lee]

We went bowling.

[Andrew Santino]

Jimmy Oyang.

[Bobby Lee]

We went bowling.

[Andrew Santino]

Who else is in your group? Ronnie Chang.

[Bobby Lee]

But Asians are not considered.

[Andrew Santino]

Ken John.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Wait, wait. Asians are considered a full, complete person.

[Andrew Santino]

Five.

[Bobby Lee]

Like clowns.

[Andrew Santino]

Five to one.

[Bobby Lee]

We're like clowns, right? If, like some 80 of us come out of a car, it's like one person.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, five to one, right?

[Bobby Lee]

So my point is, is that you can't count that, I think. And it's also, when I do Asian, Korean, Gatherings, Right. They just happen to be there.

[Andrew Santino]

That's what friends do.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You just happen to show up, you.

[Bobby Lee]

Know, and it's like a ching chong fest. I don't know what else to call. Call it.

[Andrew Santino]

You know, it's an Asian fest.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah, I. I read the. I should have read the text.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

It gave it away.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Do. You buried yourself?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I buried myself in that.

[Andrew Santino]

You buried yourself.

[Bobby Lee]

That's why. Yeah. I'd be a bad lawyer. I would forget things.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Oh, no, you just.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You would just give them information. They should. They should have.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

By the way, speaking of lawyers, let's.

[Bobby Lee]

Not go to this. Oh, no. Oh, no. I know.

[Andrew Santino]

No, let's.

[Bobby Lee]

I mean, no. I mean, you.

[Andrew Santino]

Let's get it over with.

[Bobby Lee]

No. Okay. You asked me why I was bummed out lately.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

I think that was the foundation of it.

[Andrew Santino]

So I did see this. I sent this to Carl. You.

[Bobby Lee]

You rubbed in my face last week.

[Andrew Santino]

No, I didn't. No, I didn't. I. What I said was you rubbed it.

[Bobby Lee]

You rubbed in my.

[Andrew Santino]

I said it's blasphemy. And I said to Carlos smirk. I said, he's going to be pissed off.

[Carlos]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Tom DeLonge is being inducted into the Poway High School hall of fame. Tom DeLonge of Blink 182, by the way. The thing that I was upset about was there was another woman that was inducted who I don't think is famous.

[Bobby Lee]

None of them are. Well, Tom DeLonge, he's the first guy that's famous that is actually in the hall of fame before it's like scientists. And there was one guy, an actor who was like. He started a community theater in north park for gay men. It's like, okay, he's in.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, maybe you need to do something like that. Important work, something for the community.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, you think I'm not doing an important work for them? Yeah, but I don't know what they want. And when I went to school there, I didn't know what they wanted. I didn't feel a part of. I felt ostracized.

[Andrew Santino]

Not by the school itself, by the people that inhabited it.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, just the whole. I mean, you have to understand, Po High School was that controversy where that kid wore that anti gay T shirt and he went to court for it.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't remember this.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, it up.

[Andrew Santino]

So Poway High. Some kid wore I I hate gays or something like that.

[Bobby Lee]

No, it was like. It was like a derogatory T shirt with, you know, I mean, that expressed.

[Andrew Santino]

His point of view about gay is not okay. Is that what he wore?

[Bobby Lee]

I don't know. But what. What I want to say is what I've done for the school. Okay. It was. I was on two sporting teams.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Wrestling and tennis. Oh, okay. Right.

[Bobby Lee]

What?

[Andrew Santino]

I forgot.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah. I was a pure counselor.

[Andrew Santino]

You were?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Wow.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't know why you're smirking, guy. So I was.

[Andrew Santino]

I thought you said it was a pear counselor at first. And I thought, yeah, like the fruit. I didn't know they did counselors by shape.

[Bobby Lee]

The good one.

[Andrew Santino]

All right, come on.

[Bobby Lee]

That's a good one.

[Andrew Santino]

You were a peer counselor. You were on two sports.

[Bobby Lee]

Two sports.

[Andrew Santino]

Everybody liked you. You were a musician. Did you play at the school?

[Bobby Lee]

No, I wasn't a musician then, but I was also in a play. And also fourthly, though, I also was. I got sober my junior year.

[Andrew Santino]

Right.

[Bobby Lee]

So my senior year, I was like, you know, I participated and, you know, I mean, 12 step kind of things and spread a positive message, you know, at school. You know, I think what they're. They're basing it on is my nudity and my.

[Andrew Santino]

What does that have to do with anything?

[Bobby Lee]

That's what I'm. I mean, that's my point of view.

[Andrew Santino]

No, I think they're basing it on. I think they're basing it on the fact that you are free, creative, wild, unhinged. And these people on that list are probably bridled, protected, safe. You're free. You're an artist. Yeah, they don't have any wild artists on there.

[Bobby Lee]

Like, did you remember, like, they had a counselor for, like. What was it called? It was like an occupational counselor or something where, you know, that you would see somebody like, you know, I mean, a staff member of the school and they would direct your life.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Occupational therapist or whatever, like.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, but we had that where it was like. And I remember going in. They're like, all right. Well, they looked at my grades and they go, wood shop. And I go. I was a junior. I was like, wood shop. I mean, that's because you're failing in all these things and you have no asset or ability. Right. And I'm like, you know, I. If I could go back now, I would go, yeah, but I'm. Funny. Is that. Is there a path for that?

[Andrew Santino]

Right.

[Bobby Lee]

But that. To that school, that kind of. Is not even a. They wouldn't never promote that or give you an option.

[Andrew Santino]

Wasn't an artistic school. Didn't have.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, it's like, yeah, it's like it's either you become an engineer or lawyer, doctor or whatever. Whatever. Right. Or, you know, a businessman, or you're working with wood.

[Andrew Santino]

Right.

[Bobby Lee]

You get me?

[Andrew Santino]

Carpet.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't know what you know. I mean, you know, you're a welder or whatever.

[Andrew Santino]

You know, I've also never, never in my life seen an Asian carpenter.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, you wouldn't last a day.

[Andrew Santino]

I've never seen an Asian. Look, Google. Are there Asian carpenters? I cannot. Was Jesus Asian? I don't think there's ever been an Asian carpenter. Yes, there are Asian car.

[Bobby Lee]

There are buildings. Who built the buildings in Asia?

[Andrew Santino]

The buildings in Asia. We send white people over there.

[Bobby Lee]

No, no, no, no. Not Africans.

[Andrew Santino]

There's a guy's Instagram called the Asian carpenter.

[Bobby Lee]

Exactly.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, let me see some of his work.

[Bobby Lee]

Let's see some of his work. Dude, look at that table, dude. That's a standard, very good table.

[Andrew Santino]

He built just the legs. It says he didn't even build the top.

[Bobby Lee]

All right. Fuck this guy. Anyway. That's nice.

[Andrew Santino]

Doesn't look any carpentry to me.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, staircasing.

[Andrew Santino]

That's the ceiling.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh. Anyway.

[Andrew Santino]

Anyway.

[Bobby Lee]

But what. I mean, it's just so. I remember at school, when I was in high school, I was like. I remember going, oh, I'm fucked.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. I felt the exact same.

[Bobby Lee]

Because they're like, you have they told you to your face there is no future for you?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

And this is where you. We suggest you go. And I'm like, I can't believe there's no way. So I had to go out in the world and, you know, feel some pain.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

And then it drove me into whatever I'm doing now.

[Andrew Santino]

But look at what you. Look at you now.

[Bobby Lee]

I think that in many ways, pirate poway High school drove me into this because it's like they were. They didn't support me.

[Andrew Santino]

Right.

[Bobby Lee]

And so that made you stronger. So now, you know what, with that point of view, I don't want to be in the hall of fame.

[Andrew Santino]

Good. But you do.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't.

[Andrew Santino]

You do. A little bit.

[Bobby Lee]

I do.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

I sure do. But you know what? But if it doesn't happen, I understand.

[Andrew Santino]

It should happen. And I don't understand. And I will say this. I'm going down to San Diego to do shows down there. I'm thinking about stopping by.

[Bobby Lee]

No. When are you going?

[Andrew Santino]

Paying a little.

[Bobby Lee]

When are you going visit? When are you going?

[Andrew Santino]

I think it's in February. I don't know.

[Bobby Lee]

I have to go with you.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, you do. I think I'm going to pay a little fucking visit to Powell High School. I think it's the move. In fact, you know what I would love to do?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You, Doug Stanhope, used to do shows at Montreal across the street from like the corporate venues or whatever. I think it was Montreal.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Have you heard about that?

[Bobby Lee]

I remember that. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

We should do a show across the street. A pop up show across the street from Poway High. Where is Poway? Look up Poway. And what's across the street? Is it like a field or something?

[Bobby Lee]

I think there's a theater attached to Poway High School. I don't know if you can rent that out.

[Andrew Santino]

It's got to be theirs, though.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, that's.

[Andrew Santino]

That's on them.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Listen up. If there's anybody at the Performing Arts center, look at.

[Carlos]

That's nothing to do with the high school. I think.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, that Poe center for the. I think. I don't think. I think it's attached to the school, but I think that it's private. Like we can rent it. Maybe we should do our 250 episode from there.

[Andrew Santino]

Just getting sick of his shit.

[Bobby Lee]

I know.

[Andrew Santino]

Just getting real sick.

[Bobby Lee]

Let's let go of this. I mean, are you in yours hall of fame at your school?

[Andrew Santino]

There is no hall. We don't have a hall of fame. But I'm in like the Wikipedia page. Yeah, me too.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm in the Wikipedia.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. No, we don't. We don't have a whole thing.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. You don't have one.

[Andrew Santino]

No. It's actually very weird. I've never.

[Bobby Lee]

Why do you start one up?

[Andrew Santino]

Well, I've never heard of this until your school. Do you guys know about your hall of fame having. Andres, I'm clearly not asking you. You didn't go to high school.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I mean, well, you're.

[Bobby Lee]

Carlos. Your school doesn't have a hall of fame?

[Carlos]

No, my dad's in the hall of fame at the military school I went to.

[Bobby Lee]

That's not what we asked.

[Andrew Santino]

That's not what we asked.

[Bobby Lee]

Interesting.

[Andrew Santino]

I was just proud.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. It has nothing to do with you. Anyway. How about you, McCone?

[Andrew Santino]

I don't know.

[Bobby Lee]

Can I tell you what I think it is? And you're gonna be so mad.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

It's just too far away from fame.

[Andrew Santino]

What do you mean I'm too far away from.

[Bobby Lee]

No, what I'm saying is that like, you know, obviously when you go out into the. You know, it's just less famous. People come from smaller towns. Like for instance.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't.

[Bobby Lee]

If you Go to, like, Beverly Hills High, right?

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, right.

[Bobby Lee]

How many famous people came from there? A lot because. A lot because the businesses just are enveloped around them, right? There's access and, you know, through nepotism and whatnot.

[Andrew Santino]

Yes, yes, yes. And it's in the.

[Bobby Lee]

Know how. It's in the city, right? So I'm sure if you saw the Beverly Hills High School hall of Fame, there's a. It's stacked. But then if you go to, like, you know, Peoria, Illinois, some school, there's hall of Fame, there's probably nobody famous that came from there. I mean, so why would they have a Hall of Fame?

[Andrew Santino]

Well, we have. We have a not so. I know what you're saying, Although yours isn't impressive either. Let's be honest. It's not like you're saying a million very cool famous people can.

[Bobby Lee]

Tony Gwynne went to my school. Baseball player. Stephanie Seymour. Supermodel. Had a baby with Axl Rose.

[Andrew Santino]

Not a real thing. Nobody cares, okay? Nobody cares. Not a real thing. Nobody cares.

[Bobby Lee]

I care.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, but that's a bullshit. Don't even make a real fame.

[Bobby Lee]

Tom DeLonge.

[Andrew Santino]

One guy. Yeah, that's the guy. No, you're not there. You're not even on it. So. No, that's wrong. It's not you. All these other people are nobodies. You're wrong, okay? Tony Gwynn. That was the only one. And by the way, these guys don't even know who Tony Gwynn is. Only I do because I like baseball.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, they mean one from your school, Andrew Tino. I know. That's it.

[Andrew Santino]

No, there's. No, There is actually a lot. A lot of pro athletes.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, that's good.

[Andrew Santino]

A lot of athletes.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay, good.

[Carlos]

Oh, Bob, did you see you're at a sperm bank as an option for people to want their babies to look like you.

[Andrew Santino]

What? Seriously?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Carlos]

You're under Bill Paxton Young.

[Andrew Santino]

Wow. Benedict Wong. Bill Paxton and Bobby Lee.

[Bobby Lee]

Who did the check, Mark?

[Andrew Santino]

You did Carlos.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, Mark.

[Bobby Lee]

Morgan and Morgan.

[Andrew Santino]

Ow.

[Bobby Lee]

What happened?

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, I got into an accident.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, yeah. I just hit you. Sorry.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't know who to call, who to turn to me. Who are you?

[Bobby Lee]

Morgan and Morgan.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, Morgan and Morgan. That's you.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Wow.

[Andrew Santino]

You're America's largest injury law firm. I've heard about you. You have over 100 offices nationwide and more than a thousand lawyers.

[Bobby Lee]

That's right.

[Andrew Santino]

That's you.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. With over $20 billion recovered for over 500,000 clients, man. Morgan and Morgan, which is me, has a proven track record of fighting to get you full and fair compensation.

[Andrew Santino]

That's incredible, because I've heard submitting an injury claim with Morgan and Morgan is so easy. There's a lot of hard things in life, like putting up with Carlos on this show for you is hard.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Committing an injury claim with Morgan and Morgan easy.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. And trying to convince myself that Andreas's breasts are manly is hard.

[Andrew Santino]

That is very hard. But submitting an injury claim with Morgan and Morgan is very, very simple.

[Bobby Lee]

Very easy.

[Andrew Santino]

If you're ever injured, you can check out Morgan and Morgan. Their fee is free unless they win. For more information, go to forthepeople.com bad friends or dial pound law pound 529 from your cell phone.

[Bobby Lee]

That's for the people. F o r the people.com bad friends or pound law £509 from your cell.

[Andrew Santino]

This is a paid advertisement.

[Bobby Lee]

Alex, do you like canned cranberry sauce, or should we make it ourselves? That's my mom. She didn't know about Instacart's family carts, so I like pecan pie this year, yes or no? Oh, and how many boxes of stuffing? So I told her we could just share a family cart and add all.

[Andrew Santino]

Our holiday favorites to the same order.

[Bobby Lee]

Without losing our voices or our sanity. It's so much fun. Alex, can you get my holiday village.

[Andrew Santino]

Out of the attic?

[Bobby Lee]

Baby steps, Alex. Baby steps. Shop Instacart this holiday season and enjoy free delivery on your first three orders. Service fees and terms apply. Alex. This episode is brought to you by Allstate. Some people just know they could save hundreds on car insurance by checking Allstate First. Like, you know, to check the date of the big game first before you accidentally buy tickets on your 20th wedding anniversary and have to spend the next 20 years of your marriage making up for it. Yeah, checking first is smart. So check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate Savings. Vary terms apply. Allstate Fire and Casualty Insurance Company, NFL Affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois. Okay, so how about this? From now on, we. Let's not talk about PO High School hall of Fame ever again.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't need to. I just.

[Bobby Lee]

Because last week you kind of bummed me out, but now I'm kind of going through the process of letting it go, and I'm going to let it go.

[Andrew Santino]

It's an injustice is all I'm going to say.

[Bobby Lee]

I mean, I truly believe it is, though.

[Andrew Santino]

I really do. I'm not. I'm not being positioned.

[Bobby Lee]

I Mean, can I. Can I just try to just verbally say why I think it is your case? State your case. You think I should state my case without bragging?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, I mean, that'll be hard to do, but go ahead.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay, so I have two. I have one very popular podcast.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

With you? Yeah, I have one that's fairly popular. Tiger Belly. Okay. So then I also was on a.

[Andrew Santino]

Sketch show, a cultural iconic sketch show.

[Bobby Lee]

On television for eight years.

[Andrew Santino]

Say, a culturally iconic.

[Bobby Lee]

A culturally iconic sketch show for eight years.

[Andrew Santino]

Correct.

[Bobby Lee]

I've done numerous bit parts and comedy.

[Andrew Santino]

Movies and television shows.

[Bobby Lee]

I've been a series regular on a couple of TV shows.

[Andrew Santino]

One of the most famous of a remake of a TV show as well.

[Bobby Lee]

Which one's that?

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Sex and the Six. That's a recurring. Yeah. Reservation. I mean, I've just done a lot of Hawaii 5o. Yeah. Magnum, P.I.

[Andrew Santino]

Same thing.

[Bobby Lee]

I know what it is. I've done. I've done a lot.

[Andrew Santino]

You got yelled at by Adam Sandler.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I got yelled at by Adam Sandler.

[Andrew Santino]

How many people have been yelled at by Adam Sandler on that list?

[Bobby Lee]

Also, I've done the Tonight show as a standup and now I'm coming out with a special on a major streaming. I mean, I've done a lot.

[Andrew Santino]

A lot.

[Bobby Lee]

You know what I mean?

[Andrew Santino]

A lot.

[Bobby Lee]

And if. If that. If that doesn't do it, what does? I don't know. What else does?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, I don't know.

[Bobby Lee]

And it's. So then it's personal. They just don't like me and what I stand for. And that's okay.

[Andrew Santino]

That is okay. Who's on?

[Bobby Lee]

That's okay.

[Andrew Santino]

Who's on the board? Can we find out who's on?

[Bobby Lee]

I don't want. I don't want to know. They don't like me.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm going to call them and it's.

[Bobby Lee]

Because I go and all that stuff. I mean, and that's who I am, you know?

[Andrew Santino]

Don't show us any more sperm banks. Yeah, no, that we were going to pop up.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. No more sperm banks. No more sperm bank.

[Andrew Santino]

You can bring up some other bullshit if you had it. I saw you digging.

[Bobby Lee]

Because it's embarrassing to fight for that. What I just did there was embarrassing.

[Andrew Santino]

No, it's not embarrassing. Yeah, you deserve. You deserve to be recognized. What do you got? What is that?

[Bobby Lee]

What is this?

[Andrew Santino]

What do you got? What?

[Carlos]

Yeah, I just found this gay Chinese guy. I thought you'd like him.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. Used to say gay in Chinese. What's his name?

[Carlos]

Luke.

[Bobby Lee]

If that was my brother, my dad. Oh, my God, how awesome.

[Andrew Santino]

His name is Luke. Luke. Luke Chinese.

[Bobby Lee]

And you would never see Luke again.

[Andrew Santino]

Luke Chinese. Yeah, his name's just Luke Chinese.

[Bobby Lee]

He's the best.

[Andrew Santino]

That's the three ways to say gay and Chinese.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Now can I. I don't want to be racist against my own ethnicity.

[Andrew Santino]

It's not really.

[Bobby Lee]

Why.

[Andrew Santino]

That's near you.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

He's Chinese.

[Bobby Lee]

No, that's. I don't say nationality. I said ethnicity.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, yeah, but.

[Bobby Lee]

But he's Asian. Isn't the ethnicity kind of.

[Andrew Santino]

He's Chinese. They're.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, so they're uber Asians.

[Andrew Santino]

They're the most Asian.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, they are. Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

They're the most Asian.

[Bobby Lee]

My bad, my bad, my bad. Okay, so he's full blown Asian.

[Andrew Santino]

He's 100 Asian.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. And I'm just mid drip.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, you're.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're the adjacent.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, you're right. Next.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. And without being controversial. Yeah, right. Does he have a big head? I'm a cop. That guy robbed you. Yeah, right. And you gotta. So what did the guy look like when. The person that robbed you. Did you get a good look at him?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, it was a Chinese guy.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah. So Chinese.

[Andrew Santino]

He had like a shaved head.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Or not shaved head, but buzz hair. Got buzz hair.

[Bobby Lee]

All right, so I'm gonna get my illustrator. Come here, Frank. Frank. Frank comes. Okay, so I haven't really, because. Buzz head, but like. Shape of the face.

[Andrew Santino]

Shape of the face.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, just the overall shape of it.

[Andrew Santino]

It was overall.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, it was. What do you mean?

[Andrew Santino]

Well, you said the overall shape. It was an overall shape.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, so that.

[Andrew Santino]

Sorry. Oval, all shape.

[Bobby Lee]

Oval shape.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, it was all oval.

[Bobby Lee]

So is it more wider or is it top to bottom? I mean, can you.

[Andrew Santino]

It's kind of both.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, so just a gigantic. Like a moon, Kind of like a moon. All right.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, like a moon.

[Bobby Lee]

Like a moon. Okay, so. And his body.

[Andrew Santino]

His body. Yeah, yeah, Yes, I remember it.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. What's his body like?

[Andrew Santino]

Thick. Also well fed.

[Bobby Lee]

Right? Well fed.

[Andrew Santino]

Not hungry.

[Bobby Lee]

So Mars.

[Andrew Santino]

Yes. Yeah, it was kind of the moon.

[Bobby Lee]

Yes. Mars.

[Andrew Santino]

Yes.

[Bobby Lee]

And then moon.

[Andrew Santino]

Correct.

[Bobby Lee]

All right, put that out. I think they.

[Andrew Santino]

They got him. They got him right away.

[Bobby Lee]

Interesting. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Chinese. Luke, we love you.

[Bobby Lee]

We love.

[Andrew Santino]

I just want to let you know, we love you.

[Bobby Lee]

A lot of followers.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Luke. Chinese. He's killing it 141. He educates people on how to say things in Chinese. Carlos just goes for how to say gay in Chinese. In case you go to China. Is that what that's for?

[Carlos]

Yeah. We run into some Chinese people in Singapore.

[Andrew Santino]

Interesting. And we just might. And you got to be. You know. You know, when we go to Singapore.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You better be on your best behavior. They will lock you up for fucking around over there. You know this, right?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

This is not that. Not a joke. I'm not making a joke, but what.

[Carlos]

Around would get me in trouble?

[Bobby Lee]

I don't know. You know, even asking. Hey, you guys have any holes against wall?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Where the holes at?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Carlos]

It'd be, like, illegal asking for holes.

[Andrew Santino]

100%.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

If you spit gum on the ground, they beat the shit out of you.

[Carlos]

Well, I already looked up the.

[Bobby Lee]

Look.

[Andrew Santino]

Look up crazy laws in Singapore. It's nuts. They're gonna get you, bud. Chewing gum is not illegal.

[Bobby Lee]

All right?

[Andrew Santino]

Selling it is. The penalty for selling gum is up to $100,000.

[Bobby Lee]

So we can't. Can we try to. Can we try to smuggle some gum across the. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

That's why we're bringing McCone.

[Bobby Lee]

All right.

[Andrew Santino]

Second one is bad for you.

[Bobby Lee]

So here's. Here's the thing.

[Andrew Santino]

Smoking is illegal everywhere, and E cigarettes are banned.

[Bobby Lee]

You gotta bring up. You gotta bring a 12 pack of bubble Yum.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Bubblicious.

[Bobby Lee]

Bubblicious. If I don't see that in Singapore, dude, we're gonna have a problem.

[Andrew Santino]

Also.

[Bobby Lee]

Write that down to Carlos.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, write it down.

[Bobby Lee]

So public smoking. I smoke.

[Andrew Santino]

So smoking is illegal in most places. E cigarettes are banned. If caught smoking public, you can face up to $800 fine. Oh, fuck it. I have $800 connecting to someone else's WI fi.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, my God. Do that all the time.

[Andrew Santino]

All the time. Whoa, wait. That's punishable. Three. Three years. My death, $10,000 fine.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, my God.

[Andrew Santino]

All right, so a thousand dollars.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm a jaywalker.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm jj Walk.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, dude, I jaywalk all the time.

[Andrew Santino]

Not flushing a public toilet. Leaving pooper piss in a urinal can result in 150.

[Bobby Lee]

That's it. I'm not going. Okay? There's a whack I can't get. I can't go.

[Andrew Santino]

This one's going to hurt you.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Walking naked at home. There's a penalty for walking around naked at your own home. Insane. Feeding pigeons. This one's from a cone. That's a criminal offense, buddy. Yeah, $500 fine.

[Bobby Lee]

That's on you, dude.

[Andrew Santino]

Don't get any ideas.

[Bobby Lee]

So what's it.

[Andrew Santino]

Singing in public? Oh, singing or reciting of. So Jet Ski is going to be in deep shit.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Illegal conversation.

[Bobby Lee]

This is what we want to. We want to test some of these rules.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, I do.

[Bobby Lee]

So here's what I'm going to do, okay. I want to get a whole pack of bubble Yum, stick it in my mouth, right?

[Andrew Santino]

And naked. Chew on it.

[Bobby Lee]

Two cigarettes I dangle out of my mouth, right? And I'm going to be half naked in the streets and I'm going to go. It's a hard knock life for us. It's a hard knock life far. And I'm going to just see how long it's going to take.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh my God, you think quick. Yeah. So fast.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Wait a minute. Being homosexual punishment is up to two years in jail.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, Carlos, you can't go.

[Carlos]

No, we'll just go for one each.

[Bobby Lee]

All right. That's insane.

[Andrew Santino]

Drinking alcohol between 10pm, 10:30pm and 7am.

[Bobby Lee]

What does that say? What doesn't say? I don't see that. Oh, yeah, there it is. Holy shit.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh no.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, what?

[Andrew Santino]

We can't fly a kite. That interferes with public traffic.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh no.

[Andrew Santino]

What are we gonna do with all that? Fucking kites. We get all bin at kites. That sucks. We were gonna bring all those. So what's busking is singing for money on the street busking? You know when you're like singing with a hat.

[Bobby Lee]

I was gonna bring my acoustic guitar.

[Andrew Santino]

How are we? Dude, we should be busking.

[Bobby Lee]

We should busk over.

[Andrew Santino]

Can you imagine? They fucking arrest you for busking.

[Bobby Lee]

That's insane.

[Andrew Santino]

Firecrackers. Pirated content are banned. Pornographic stuff. I mean, we're not bring any magazines, I guess.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay, wait, wait. I bet you money they block porn sites there.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, you vpn. Gotta get a VPN on your phone.

[Bobby Lee]

I have a vpn?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Then you can watch whatever you want. That's what I do. Yeah, they block porn 100 because I've always wanted to.

[Bobby Lee]

Like, because I've never really been to a. You know, I'm a strip club at a Asian country.

[Andrew Santino]

Me neither. Oh, they have them there.

[Bobby Lee]

Do they have strip clubs in.

[Andrew Santino]

In Singapore?

[Bobby Lee]

Singapore?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

What's it called?

[Carlos]

Ten Men's Club. That might be a one you don't want to go to.

[Bobby Lee]

Why?

[Andrew Santino]

Well, because it's 10 men. You'll heal.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, but what if I know those men?

[Andrew Santino]

Wait, what?

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, shit.

[Andrew Santino]

John the Emperor. We're. It's a. We're a bit run down. The women are beautiful, which makes for good eye candy. Well, they're honest.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay, so they do have it out There, I guess.

[Andrew Santino]

But it doesn't really look like. Is porno. Is porn. Is.

[Bobby Lee]

Carlos, we gotta go.

[Carlos]

Hell, yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Hell, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Is porn illegal in Singapore? I feel like it. Yes.

[Bobby Lee]

Do we want to go?

[Andrew Santino]

I don't know. I mean, they.

[Bobby Lee]

All right. Google if they have any Michelin star restaurants. I mean, that's an incentive.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

What's the best, like, top three restaurants? Because I love food.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, there you go. Michelin guide is Singapore. Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, we.

[Andrew Santino]

So all right. They've got a lot.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, here's the deal, dude.

[Andrew Santino]

We will go to all these.

[Bobby Lee]

No, no. I need someone from our team to make reservations before. I'm being real.

[Andrew Santino]

Odette.

[Carlos]

I'm writing this down.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. At least four of them.

[Andrew Santino]

I also have a list of places that we can go because my friend. My friends that have gone have. Yeah, there's spots that are great.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Scary times usa.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

We had a great. I had a great time in.

[Bobby Lee]

I think it was better than the last one we did.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, it was great.

[Bobby Lee]

I think that if all of them went like that, I'd be encouraged to do more.

[Andrew Santino]

I had so much fun on it.

[Bobby Lee]

You know what it was is that we didn't rehearse that much. You know, you guys kept it loose.

[Andrew Santino]

We had good bits lined up.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. I mean, we kind of knew the directions, but it's like in terms of order. And so I think they were mixed up a little bit. But I was fine with it. I thought. I just thought the guest was great. It was surprising to see the angry grandmother.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

She was what a sweet lady. You know, they drove here from Michigan. I just love her and a grandson so much. And then.

[Andrew Santino]

So funny.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And then Dax Flame came by. Love Dax the Goobadopolis.

[Bobby Lee]

The Goobadopoulos came. And I thought on top of that.

[Andrew Santino]

We had a drag queen book reading.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Because I wanted to get educated.

[Bobby Lee]

I thought Jules was fun. I thought was the whole thing was very positive. And we should do it again.

[Andrew Santino]

I would love to do it again. I had a great time. I like doing stuff like that.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. It's different than this because it's like. It's looser.

[Andrew Santino]

It's wild.

[Bobby Lee]

It's wild.

[Andrew Santino]

And the interaction with the fans. I do love when we get to talk to the fans, bringing them up on screen, seeing them in their home.

[Bobby Lee]

You know, I mean, we could dedicate for a second to talk about our fans first, because I don't think we do that enough.

[Andrew Santino]

Give it to me.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. It's the thing that keeps me going I think.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, that's beautiful and sad at the same time.

[Bobby Lee]

No, it is sad. It's more sad than beautiful. It's the thing that makes me kind of want to get up and put one foot in front of the other and move forward. That we have people and we've met them in the streets.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

And it just. It's a real surprise and a real blessing. And I. I've just been. What? Why'd you shake your head?

[Carlos]

Because I don't believe it.

[Bobby Lee]

I would like to address something in the room. No, no, no, no. I'd really like to address something in the room and.

[Andrew Santino]

Please.

[Bobby Lee]

I know we've said it as a joke, you know, I mean, about firing and changing the team up.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, we have.

[Bobby Lee]

And, you know, we do it in jest, you know, I really mean this. I think we should change it up.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Because right there, right there was fucking out of pocket.

[Andrew Santino]

Out of pocket. It was unaligned with my morals and my blatant disrespect. Blatant disrespectful and cringe worthy, if I'll be honest.

[Bobby Lee]

You know, so. You know, I've noticed lately you talk to me in a certain way as if we're bros. That's so not true. As if we're both captains of the same ship.

[Andrew Santino]

No. And on this ship, dude, you're scooping shit.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I'm the captain.

[Carlos]

No, that's projection.

[Bobby Lee]

That's not even that respond right there is what I'm talking about. Even just that response right there.

[Carlos]

I don't curse at you.

[Bobby Lee]

That's that response to everything you're saying right now, dude, is what I'm talking about.

[Carlos]

Grew up.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay.

[Carlos]

I'm having flash.

[Bobby Lee]

No, you never. You never used to be like this. And so for me to get vulnerable, to talk about the fans and for you to call me out on something that wasn't even a thing. Right. Is really hurtful.

[Andrew Santino]

It is.

[Bobby Lee]

And do I have time to apologize? No, no, no, no. There's no time. No, you didn't. The damage is done. So I'm going to highly consider maybe coming up with other options.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm okay with that.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Let's talk about the. All the group.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Might as well. McCone.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

You've been a lot better with me.

[Andrew Santino]

Impressive.

[Bobby Lee]

You're not. You're not needy. You know what I mean? And I think you've softened a little bit. I think you know how to read me in the situation. And I. I think that you're good for right now.

[Andrew Santino]

You're okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Fancy. I will never do your zombie movie. I will never do it. You know, in fact, I will do nothing outside of this with you.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

You know?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

I think that you attack me way more than you attack Andrew.

[Andrew Santino]

That's true.

[Bobby Lee]

You know what I mean?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

That's undeniable about how fat I am. Hey. What? What? Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You agree?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

But you know what?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, You're.

[Andrew Santino]

You're. Honestly, though.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

You speak your mind.

[Andrew Santino]

You are skating on thin ice.

[Bobby Lee]

There's no ice. There's no ice. There's no Iceland.

[Andrew Santino]

All right, well, you're on a lake.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. You're. You have skates on and you're in the water.

[Carlos]

Why? What did I do that's so bad? Besides, he's.

[Andrew Santino]

The last couple times he said to me that you're frustrating him for some reason, and I think it's because, look, you run the Instagram account for bad friends, right?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You do a great job.

[Bobby Lee]

Thank you.

[Andrew Santino]

I think a little bit of that follower number is going to your head. A little bit.

[Carlos]

I mean, we.

[Andrew Santino]

See, See?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

See, it's going to his head. Are you using it to DM people?

[Carlos]

No, I do that on my own account.

[Andrew Santino]

But, I mean, do you ever, like.

[Carlos]

Transfer the girl over to Herrera? Carlos, Obviously.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay, so it's. It's power. He's got power now.

[Bobby Lee]

You know, I also.

[Andrew Santino]

A good amount of power.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. I also want to say this. And this is from my heart.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Carlos]

And managing the Australian tour, and you're.

[Andrew Santino]

Doing a great job.

[Bobby Lee]

Great job. I didn't say you didn't. You know, you weren't doing a good job. I'm saying your relationship with me. Yeah, he's talking about how I feel in the workplace.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. And for many years, I thought that you work for us and we happen to be at 7 Akis.

[Andrew Santino]

Right.

[Bobby Lee]

But the truth is, you work for 7 Akis and you're a spy.

[Carlos]

That's insane.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. You're. You're a spy because I see you over there, right? And you know, the woodwork. Very comfortable there.

[Andrew Santino]

Very comfortable.

[Bobby Lee]

And that's. You know, I understand now that you're not really on our ship. You're a hired gun.

[Carlos]

But I should know that place, because I go to work there. I should know my way around.

[Andrew Santino]

This does sound like some spy, though.

[Bobby Lee]

It's spy dude.

[Carlos]

No, I'm a double agent.

[Bobby Lee]

That's what we're saying.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, that's. That's not a good thing. No, that's not a good thing. You're working both sides.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

So what's the real end game?

[Carlos]

Just hanging with my bros. I just want.

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, no, no, no, no.

[Bobby Lee]

That's not that.

[Carlos]

Is it?

[Andrew Santino]

No, that's not it.

[Bobby Lee]

That's not. No, no, no, that's not it.

[Andrew Santino]

No.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

What's the real end game?

[Bobby Lee]

What's the end game here, dude? Our demise.

[Carlos]

I have had this fantasy.

[Bobby Lee]

Here we go. This is the truth. Let's hear it.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Finally.

[Bobby Lee]

I love it.

[Carlos]

No, it has nothing to do with Andrew.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, no. What is it?

[Carlos]

That I come in with some really good news. Like, guys, I finally did it. I have another job. I. I thought you'd be, like, so proud of me. I didn't need your help to get there. I'm gonna go spread my wings and I'm gonna say, like, you, Bobby, because you're gonna make fun of me in that moment, and I'm gonna be prepared.

[Andrew Santino]

So you daydream about telling Bobby to go himself. That's like a moment.

[Carlos]

No, it's a night dream sometimes.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, you. This is like an immersive dream where you feel it. You feel paralysis.

[Carlos]

I can't even get out of it.

[Andrew Santino]

But you feel it. You're saying fuck you to him and it feels good. In your dream?

[Carlos]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Wow.

[Carlos]

You didn't say hi to me or undress for five minutes at Andrew's party. And then you made fun of us for having a conversation alone. I should be allowed to talk to Fancy.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay, I understand.

[Carlos]

You don't understand.

[Bobby Lee]

Let's talk about something else. I understand now. I know. I understand it. It just came to me, like, you.

[Andrew Santino]

Know you saw it.

[Bobby Lee]

I saw it all.

[Andrew Santino]

Wow.

[Bobby Lee]

Like, the first time I saw it. You know what I mean? You remember they live.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Right.

[Andrew Santino]

Right.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. I could put the glasses on and then. I know what it is.

[Andrew Santino]

It's clear.

[Bobby Lee]

I see the writing in the wall. You mean I see the world. I see the Matrix and it's again stacked up against me. And I have to, like. I have to survive.

[Andrew Santino]

You do. You have to fight back.

[Bobby Lee]

I do have to survive.

[Andrew Santino]

Because you can't just sit there.

[Bobby Lee]

I can't sit there and let them take over.

[Andrew Santino]

Right.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. And I think I'm generous.

[Carlos]

The guy cleaning the boat can, like, sharpen his knife at night and dream about murdering the captain.

[Bobby Lee]

Wow.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, my.

[Bobby Lee]

It's a common wow. Wow.

[Andrew Santino]

This is how you feel?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

We're finally double.

[Bobby Lee]

I love it. This is the real stuff.

[Andrew Santino]

This is it.

[Bobby Lee]

I love it. This is the real stuff. No. What's Real. No, no, that's bullshit.

[Carlos]

So tell everyone in comedy, you've always been my homie. You and Andrew, I've always trusted.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, but.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, but what? But what?

[Carlos]

But sometimes you have bully tactics.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't have bully tactics.

[Carlos]

Oh, that's not talking to me. In fancy, when you walk in, you only talk to the famous people.

[Andrew Santino]

He was busy.

[Bobby Lee]

I was busy talking to the famous people. Thank you.

[Carlos]

Sorry.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. I walk in, oh, there's famous. Oh, let's go to the guys I see every day. I mean, what are you talking about?

[Andrew Santino]

But that's his job, to go talk to other people.

[Bobby Lee]

Exactly. It's work.

[Andrew Santino]

He's a personality, you know, and you should know that.

[Carlos]

You're right.

[Bobby Lee]

You know what I mean?

[Carlos]

You're right.

[Bobby Lee]

You know that time that you were hitting on Kalila when I was dating her?

[Carlos]

That is insane.

[Bobby Lee]

What? You know what I mean? You don't think I know about that either, Dude. So you know me. You want to go? You want to go? You want to go. Whoa, whoa, whoa. All right.

[Andrew Santino]

Have you had an issue recently with somebody? Yeah. Okay. That's why I can feel this.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Something's going on.

[Bobby Lee]

Something's going on with him. Yeah, because you know, when he. Something's going on, he attacks and he's attacking me. You know, you're on this guy. You know, here's the truth guy, Right?

[Carlos]

I love you too.

[Bobby Lee]

That's what I said.

[Andrew Santino]

What he said. Here's the truth.

[Carlos]

I know he was about to say, I love you.

[Bobby Lee]

No, no, no youo know, I've always had a sense that, you know, I liked you more than you liked me. That's so.

[Andrew Santino]

I felt that.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, me too.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

And I'm willing to. I'm willing to fight your hate with my love.

[Carlos]

Thank you.

[Andrew Santino]

That's interesting.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Pretty interesting, huh?

[Andrew Santino]

And can I tell you something about that?

[Bobby Lee]

Tell me about it.

[Andrew Santino]

When you said, fight hate with love.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You know who did that?

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Jesus.

[Bobby Lee]

That's right.

[Andrew Santino]

And what did your counselor in high school tell you? To be a carpenter. So it is right here.

[Bobby Lee]

Exactly.

[Andrew Santino]

Dude, you are a carpenter, and you're a carpenter of the soul. So what you're doing is you're building cabinets. You're. Well, a love castle is what I was gonna say.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You're building a love castle.

[Bobby Lee]

And others things, of course, Gazebos and whatnot.

[Andrew Santino]

Sure, they have to be built on the outside, but build the love castle. Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

And go ahead, throw it in a joke.

[Andrew Santino]

Go ahead, throw in a joke.

[Bobby Lee]

I'll Let you have it and go say it. I have it over again. I'm building, like, little gazebos.

[Andrew Santino]

Little gazebos. Yeah. You have to build those as well.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Cabinet.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

And it stairs on the ceiling. It wasn't even fun.

[Andrew Santino]

It wasn't even a good joke. We waited for a bomb.

[Bobby Lee]

We waited all that time.

[Andrew Santino]

We waited for a fucking bomb. And stairs on the.

[Bobby Lee]

Dude, why did you laugh so hard at that?

[Andrew Santino]

Because he knew how.

[Bobby Lee]

My guy was pretty bad. Oh, my God. They look like fucking stairs, dude.

[Andrew Santino]

Hey, Bobby's building a love castle.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Cabinets and gazebos.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And if Carlos is going to come at you throwing fireballs of hate flame.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Guess what?

[Bobby Lee]

I have a love shield.

[Andrew Santino]

You have a love shield, and you did a benefit for firefighters, so they will be there if you need them to put out this negative fire. That's really what I feel.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. And this podcast has been about grievances now.

[Andrew Santino]

Grievances. A lot of grievances.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I've got another one I'd like to air out.

[Bobby Lee]

I would love to hear your grievances. This is what the show's about.

[Andrew Santino]

Air out. A little grievance here.

[Bobby Lee]

Tell me.

[Andrew Santino]

Mind.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, exactly.

[Andrew Santino]

Got a little something something I knew. Hey, just step up to the mic.

[Bobby Lee]

Preach. Preach, my friend.

[Andrew Santino]

You're not even gonna believe this.

[Bobby Lee]

You know what?

[Andrew Santino]

Maybe you are.

[Bobby Lee]

I will believe it.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay, good.

[Bobby Lee]

Right? Because he can do anything, right? He's diabolical.

[Andrew Santino]

He is. All right, so endless.

[Bobby Lee]

Tell it to me, friend.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay. This guy, he's going to Detroit with me this week in Detroit and Grand Rapids. I said, you know, I'm going to get you out there so you can film and stuff like that.

[Bobby Lee]

Why not?

[Andrew Santino]

What's my budget for cameras? That's what he says. What's my budget for cameras? My budget for cameras.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm sorry, he's not Aaron Sorkin.

[Andrew Santino]

No, he thinks he is.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm trying to expand.

[Andrew Santino]

What's my budget? Timeout. This is even better one. I said, well, let's get you the flights. Let's look at the flights. Very expensive flights, weren't they? They were very expensive. I call, we take care of it. It's fine. Let's get the flights. Text. Hey, I'll show you.

[Bobby Lee]

Hey, wait, hold on. If he says, honestly, dude, if he mentions anything about business class, oh, yeah, I'm going to lose my fucking mind. I'm being real. I will lose my fucking mind.

[Andrew Santino]

Comfort plus or better, then what did he say? Can I get Comfort plus or better?

[Bobby Lee]

I'll fucking show you Comforts.

[Andrew Santino]

Go get him. Go him, up. Go. This guy up. He thinks he needs room for all of his camera equipment. I say, you're not gonna put that under the seat.

[Carlos]

I'm tall and I have to put under.

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, no business class.

[Bobby Lee]

No WestJet.

[Andrew Santino]

No spearri.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Spirit in the air.

[Bobby Lee]

You know what, dude? Cancel it.

[Andrew Santino]

All right?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, it.

[Andrew Santino]

That's a good call.

[Bobby Lee]

It's ins. You know what it's like. You give them an inch, they take a mile.

[Andrew Santino]

All of it. They take all of it first.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You've heard that phrase before, right? That's what you are, giving people an inch.

[Andrew Santino]

Whoa. Fucking fucker. Dude.

[Bobby Lee]

So, dudes, what a holy. I've never. Why are you laughing?

[Andrew Santino]

I'm not.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. That was insane.

[Andrew Santino]

Step back from the mic.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, step back from there.

[Andrew Santino]

Jesus Christ.

[Bobby Lee]

What do you say?

[Andrew Santino]

Let's talk about giving people an inch. Yeah, really good.

[Bobby Lee]

It's pretty good.

[Andrew Santino]

Now, take notes, Spaniard.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

That's the kind of we like over.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, that was a good one.

[Andrew Santino]

That's gonna get him back in the running.

[Bobby Lee]

Not in with me.

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, but still as a whole.

[Bobby Lee]

Not with me. But we. We took a couple of steps back. Okay. You know me, but. Wow.

[Andrew Santino]

Wow. All right, Carlos, clear the air. Finally. Just say what you need to say.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, go ahead.

[Andrew Santino]

Because I know you got. I know you want to just say it, so just say what you want to say.

[Carlos]

I'm sorry, Bob.

[Andrew Santino]

No, that's not what it is. That's not what it is.

[Bobby Lee]

What are you sorry about?

[Carlos]

I'm sorry that I had those dark feelings about wanting to murder you. And I thought that in our final moment of me coming here and wanting to spread my wings, that you'd be proud.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Carlos]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

That's not what I was mad about. You brought. That. You brought that up with unsolicited.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

I didn't even need to know that. You know what I mean? You made it worse by bringing that up.

[Andrew Santino]

Way worse.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. What I'm saying is that I was giving a heartfelt message to the fans. You thought I was lying, right? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So it's like, now I know way more information, and now I feel even more angry.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

You know what I mean? It's like, why would you have these fantasies? I've never had a dreadful fantasy about you. You mean, I. I've had fantasies of, like, saving you when you were drowning or something.

[Carlos]

Really?

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Or emotionally.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, emotionally.

[Andrew Santino]

Literally.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But my point is, is that I've only thought. Positive. I've only said positive things about you in the world. Right. And for you to even have held.

[Carlos]

At me so many times as a.

[Bobby Lee]

Dude, that's my role as a boss.

[Carlos]

I'm sensitive sometimes.

[Bobby Lee]

No, you're not.

[Carlos]

I am. I got. We got in a fight in Atlanta and my. You've hurt my feelings.

[Bobby Lee]

What was the fight about?

[Carlos]

It would like a microphone not working in a previous show or something.

[Bobby Lee]

Exactly. And should have worked. You're right, exactly. No, like, sustained pedals never work at venues.

[Andrew Santino]

Never once.

[Bobby Lee]

Not one time. I'm in front of thousands of people and, oh, shit, the sustain's not working. I should. You know, it's like. There's so many things that I could. Right. But I don't, you know. Get your shit together, man.

[Carlos]

It's getting together. It's together. It's been together. We're going to go to Australia. You're going to eat at your fucking Michelin restaurants. You're going to see.

[Bobby Lee]

Wow.

[Carlos]

No, that's just me being passionate.

[Bobby Lee]

Wow. Wow, wow. I know, I know, I know, I know. I get. I can't believe it.

[Andrew Santino]

It didn't sound like passion, dude.

[Bobby Lee]

It didn't sound like passion. It sounded like deep resentment.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, passionate. Do passionate fancy. Give me passionate.

[Bobby Lee]

I love working with you, Bobby. And we're gonna make an awesome zombie movie together.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, no, no. Delusional.

[Bobby Lee]

You know what, bud? You know, I'm gonna do the. Okay, I'll do your zombie Bobby.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, don't do that.

[Bobby Lee]

I know.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, I'll do it. But he will. Yeah, that's passion.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. And McCone, I have a small penis.

[Andrew Santino]

No, you don't.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't, but that's what you told the world.

[Andrew Santino]

But it's not.

[Bobby Lee]

Thank you so much for doing that, man. Like I don't have enough problems. The world knows it worked. The world know it's good.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay, just stop.

[Bobby Lee]

I have a very good penis. And then we'll see. Thank you for being bad friend.

[Andrew Santino]

Great.