Korean Joker v Dave Blunts

Summary

Podcast Summary: Bad Friends – Episode: Korean Joker v Dave Blunts

Episode Information:

• Title: Korean Joker v Dave Blunts
• Hosts: Bobby Lee & Andrew Santino
• Release Date: March 24, 2025
• Production: A 7EQUIS Production
• Platforms: Available on Bad Friends Instagram, Patreon, TikTok, and Bad Friends Website.

---

1. Hosts’ Banter and Personal Dynamics

Early in the episode, Bobby Lee and Andrew Santino engage in their signature playful and candid conversation, setting the tone for the episode.

• Andrew Santino (00:55): “Let us know if you'd like to come to it. Would we get comped or backstage, all that stuff?”
• Bobby Lee (01:03): “We never go to these places. Once the show's done, we no come back.”

The hosts openly discuss their friendship, addressing past misunderstandings and affirming their bond.

• Bobby Lee (01:12): "You texted me today and you said. Are you mad at me? Never."
• Andrew Santino (01:14): "I've never been mad at you."

They delve into moments of frustration and reconciliation, illustrating the depth and longevity of their friendship.

2. Introduction of Rudy and Inside Jokes

Rudy Jude, a recurring character in their circle, makes an appearance, bringing humor through inside jokes and exaggerated personalities.

• Rudy (03:26): “I'm happy.”
• Jules (03:33): “Ruby back. Rudy Giuliani is back in the studio. Are you happy to be back?”

The hosts joke about Rudy’s role in their lives, emphasizing their camaraderie and the playful teasing that defines their interactions.

3. Dissecting Animals – A Humorous Segment

A quirky segment unfolds where Rudy discusses his peculiar hobby of dissecting animals, adding an unexpected twist to the conversation.

• Jules (02:29): “I've just been dissecting animals.”
• Andrew Santino (02:39): “How are you dissecting earthworms? They're so small.”

The absurdity of the topic juxtaposed with their comedic delivery highlights the hosts' ability to find humor in the most unexpected subjects.

4. Reflections on Past Shows and Experiences

Bobby Lee reminisces about past performances and mishaps during previous shows, sharing personal anecdotes that resonate with listeners.

• Bobby Lee (08:30): “When I got off stage, I started to cry. I bombed so bad.”
• Andrew Santino (08:40): “Well, MySpace isn't even around anymore, is it?”

They discuss the evolution of their careers, the challenges faced, and the growth they've experienced over the years.

5. Health and Personal Growth

The conversation shifts to personal health journeys, particularly focusing on Bobby Lee's experiences and struggles.

• Andrew Santino (27:08): “One pounds. One pound.”
• Bobby Lee (38:18): “We have doggos epic now.”

They discuss topics like healthy living, the importance of physical and mental well-being, and the impact of personal choices on their lives.

6. Guest Appearance: Dave Blunts

The episode features a special guest, Dave Blunts, a rapper embarking on a tour. His interaction with the hosts provides fresh dynamics and new comedic elements.

• Dave Blunts (44:11): “I'm getting ready to go on tour.”
• Andrew Santino (56:00): “You are?”

Dave shares insights into his music career, tour preparations, and personal anecdotes, enriching the episode with his unique perspective.

7. Comedic Skits and Improvisation

Bobby Lee, Andrew Santino, and Dave Blunts engage in comedic improvisation, crafting fictional scenarios and playful dialogues that showcase their chemistry and humor.

• Bobby Lee (53:01): “I have a little dick.”
• Dave Blunts (55:44): “I'm not going for none of that no more.”

These segments are filled with rapid-fire jokes, exaggerated characters, and humorous observations, keeping the audience entertained throughout.

8. Discussions on Friendship and Support

The hosts emphasize the importance of friendship, support systems, and understanding within their personal and professional relationships.

• Bobby Lee (74:01): “I love you, dude.”
• Dave Blunts (75:57): “Yeah, I'm a fan for.”

They reflect on mutual support, overcoming challenges together, and the significance of having reliable friends in their lives.

9. Closing Remarks and Future Plans

As the episode concludes, the hosts and guest discuss future collaborations, upcoming tours, and projects, expressing their excitement and plans moving forward.

• Dave Blunts (74:31): “I'm a fan for. I'm fanned out right now.”
• Andrew Santino (75:31): “We could probably do a 2B release.”

Their enthusiasm for upcoming endeavors leaves listeners anticipating more engaging content in future episodes.

---

Notable Quotes:

• Andrew Santino (00:55): “Let us know if you'd like to come to it. Would we get comped or backstage, all that stuff?”
• Bobby Lee (29:32): “Neza 2 is out. Okay. It made $2 billion in China. It's the greatest animation movie I've ever seen.”
• Dave Blunts (75:57): “Yeah, I'm a fan for. I'm fanned out right now.”

---

Conclusion: This episode of Bad Friends masterfully blends humor, personal stories, and engaging conversations. Bobby Lee and Andrew Santino, along with guest Dave Blunts, navigate through a myriad of topics—from quirky hobbies to heartfelt reflections—delivering an entertaining and relatable podcast experience. Their seamless interplay, punctuated with memorable quotes and inside jokes, ensures that both longtime fans and new listeners find something to enjoy in this dynamic episode.

Transcript

[Bobby Lee]

Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile with.

[Andrew Santino]

A message for everyone paying big wireless way too much. Please, for the love of everything good in this world, stop with Mint. You can get premium wireless for just $15 a month. Of course, if you enjoy overpaying. No judgments. But that's weird. Okay, one judgment anyway. Give it a try. @mintmobile.com Switch upfront payment of $45 for 3 month plan equivalent to $15 per month.

[Bobby Lee]

Required intro rate first 3 months only.

[Andrew Santino]

Then full price plan options available.

[Bobby Lee]

Taxes and fees extra.

[Andrew Santino]

See full [e-mail] hello. Hello there, mate. Mate, I'm be on toast. And we're going to London, England, July 18th. And then July 19th, we'll be in Dublin, Ireland. Tickets are available. Right?

[Bobby Lee]

We never go to these places.

[Andrew Santino]

Never go to these places.

[Bobby Lee]

Once the show's done, you. We no come back.

[Andrew Santino]

We no come back.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. So you got to go.

[Andrew Santino]

You got to go. So go to badfriends pod.com for those tickets, badfriendspod.com you2 are bad friends. Who are these two idiots?

[Bobby Lee]

White dude and an Asian dude. You two are disgusting. You two or something. We're bad friends.

[Andrew Santino]

Let me tell you something. You texted me today and you said. Are you mad at me? Never.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, you do. You get angry. And you know what?

[Andrew Santino]

I've never been mad at you.

[Bobby Lee]

You have. Dollywood.

[Andrew Santino]

Do you cancel sessions that are important to us?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I know. That's what I'm talking about. It's an inner lingering, slow burn of anger.

[Andrew Santino]

Hi, Rudy.

[Bobby Lee]

Jewels. Look what we got for you. A normal chair. Rudy.

[Andrew Santino]

Rudy.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Jules]

I haven't seen you since last year.

[Andrew Santino]

Do you miss me? I missed you. But you're going over to Tiger Belly. You're doing that all the time. And you're really breaking my heart a little bit.

[Jules]

No, because.

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, no, no. We embraced you.

[Bobby Lee]

Not just Tiger Belly.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

She's trash Tuesday, baby.

[Andrew Santino]

Where the money is. So here's the problem.

[Bobby Lee]

Give me. And the followings and the glamour and the glitz.

[Andrew Santino]

We gave you your start.

[Bobby Lee]

Nothing.

[Andrew Santino]

She dropped us. Dude. We are. We're. We are the. The guy that.

[Bobby Lee]

Exactly. Dude.

[Andrew Santino]

Before she got famous.

[Bobby Lee]

Exactly.

[Andrew Santino]

And she drops us. No, she got famous. You know the. The first guy that you date.

[Bobby Lee]

I'll even do one. You better, dude.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Give it right. We're the hot guy. Right? That she dated.

[Andrew Santino]

I disagree with the first part, but.

[Bobby Lee]

Just hear my point.

[Andrew Santino]

We're the medium guy.

[Bobby Lee]

We're the medium guy. But then she got blew up and went uglier. Oh, yeah, that's what I meant. That's what I meant.

[Andrew Santino]

Interesting.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. Like, I'm going to go just. I'm going to go down. I'm going to go downtown.

[Andrew Santino]

What's been going on, Jules?

[Jules]

I've just been dissecting animals.

[Andrew Santino]

God bless.

[Jules]

God bless rats and earthworms and the crickets.

[Andrew Santino]

How are you dissecting earthworms? They're so small. You're using the tiniest little knife.

[Jules]

Yeah, and it's really fun, especially with the rats.

[Andrew Santino]

You love dissecting rats.

[Bobby Lee]

She went to ugly and also just ghosted the hot guy.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, as soon as. As soon as. Here's what really happened.

[Bobby Lee]

Tell me the science behind it.

[Andrew Santino]

As soon as she left this show and you and Kalila broke up and she started to get away from our show.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

That's when she was like, I don't need to talk to Tito Andrew ever again. And she.

[Bobby Lee]

That seems to be the truth.

[Jules]

The truth.

[Bobby Lee]

That seems to be the reality.

[Andrew Santino]

That's okay. Did I. Did I show you nothing but love for four years?

[Bobby Lee]

Pure love. It is the kind of love. It's the kind of love Mother Teresa gave. Same to the pores.

[Andrew Santino]

Exact same.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah. It's that kind of.

[Andrew Santino]

Undying.

[Bobby Lee]

Undying love. That's what I meant. Anyway.

[Andrew Santino]

Ladies and gentlemen, Rudy back. Rudy Giuliani is back in the studio. Are you happy to be back?

[Jules]

I'm happy.

[Andrew Santino]

Who of the people here are you happiest to see? Let's go. In order happiest to least happy to see. Go ahead.

[Jules]

Versus you.

[Andrew Santino]

Thank you.

[Jules]

Andres.

[Andrew Santino]

Yes.

[Jules]

Carlos.

[Andrew Santino]

Awesome. Love that. And Bobby's sep. You're separate. It doesn't count because she sees you all the time. We see. She sees you all the time.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm not even on the list. What you're. I cannot believe. Let me ask you, lady.

[Andrew Santino]

I see her every day.

[Bobby Lee]

There was a fire long ago, right? Yeah, right. Was there not a fire long ago? Right.

[Andrew Santino]

The great Chicago.

[Bobby Lee]

No, the great LA Fire. Oh, the lovely people are running. You know? I mean. Yeah, running. Right, right. I get a call, can you harbor and take care of immigrants, little jewels.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

And the dogs. And I said kindly, my heart is out to you.

[Andrew Santino]

My heart goes out.

[Bobby Lee]

And you know what happens to that heart? H. They pee on it.

[Andrew Santino]

They piss on your heart.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You piss. You squat on his chest in the.

[Bobby Lee]

Yellowstone you've ever seen.

[Andrew Santino]

Wow.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Jimmy O. Yang yellow.

[Andrew Santino]

Wow.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. That's the most yellow you can get, right?

[Andrew Santino]

Very bright. That is a bright star.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, I'll Say this. I'm glad that you're back. I love that you put McCone last. He is the least important of the crew. Although he did have a fun time at my special. And then he went and jumped in the. What'd you do? You jumped in the lake?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, at a polar plunge.

[Andrew Santino]

He did a polar plunge. And all they. All the proceeds went to. So all the proceeds went. It was for Special Olympics. So here's what they do. All the money they collected. They rounded up all of these strong people to throw handicapped people into the lake.

[Jules]

Handicap people?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, people with down syndrome. They threw them in the lake.

[Bobby Lee]

That guy doesn't have down syndrome.

[Andrew Santino]

He does. Well, he does. After he gets out of that lake.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, yeah, Yeah. I mean, shape. Down syndrome, but I don't think he had down syndrome.

[Andrew Santino]

Shape.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

The shape.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

So what? The money I donated to you went to where? I hope it didn't go to you.

[Bobby Lee]

And how much did I donate? None. Exactly. I don't believe in it.

[Andrew Santino]

You didn't give him any money?

[Bobby Lee]

I don't believe in the fucking cause.

[Andrew Santino]

It's for Special Olympics. Go ahead.

[Bobby Lee]

It is.

[Andrew Santino]

It was all for Special Olympics.

[Bobby Lee]

I said that in a text.

[Andrew Santino]

That's why I gave.

[Bobby Lee]

I thought he was doing a joke like you were in the Special. I don't read it.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, I know you didn't read it.

[Bobby Lee]

I just heard. I just read Special Olympics. He's trying to make fun of me. Like, you're in this. He's attacking me. So I didn't read the whole thing. Yeah, don't put that in there next time. But you don't get anything. But. Whoa.

[Andrew Santino]

I am happy that that money went to there. So you jumped in the river. I told you not to jump in the lake. I could have just given you the money.

[Bobby Lee]

No, it's fine. Was it cold? It was 12 degrees outside.

[Andrew Santino]

How cold was the water?

[Bobby Lee]

Water was 33 degrees.

[Andrew Santino]

Love it. And how long did you stay in for? No chance you lasted?

[Bobby Lee]

No, I was under and we out immediately.

[Andrew Santino]

You went head underneath. That's smart. That's good.

[Bobby Lee]

It's deep enough to where you kind of have to.

[Andrew Santino]

Have you ever done a polar plunge? Have you ever jumped in a freezing cold lake or body of water?

[Jules]

No. You go naked?

[Bobby Lee]

No, I was just wearing short shorts.

[Andrew Santino]

All the Special Olympics kids were naked. For sure. There's no doubt. They can't keep their clothes on.

[Bobby Lee]

I mean, I'm tired. Evans was up. But let me say something.

[Andrew Santino]

You're tired? It's 7pm we did this. We moved this shoot till nighttime. You got back from San Francisco at 9:00am what'd you do today?

[Bobby Lee]

Okay, so all weekend I did not sleep at all.

[Andrew Santino]

You were doing shows.

[Bobby Lee]

I know. Did not sleep. How? I just couldn't. It was so cold and the heat was too heat. I don't like that when the heat's too heat. You know what I mean?

[Andrew Santino]

What is your perfect optimal room temperature in a hotel?

[Bobby Lee]

Probably a 70.

[Andrew Santino]

You know, you can set that right on the thing.

[Bobby Lee]

I know, but what happens is it's so cold through the window. It combines and it does a horrific.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, it's like when the Atlantic and the Pacific top meet.

[Bobby Lee]

It's like. No, I'm more like an angel and the demon.

[Dave Blunts]

Oh.

[Bobby Lee]

And they're dancing in the air. I mean. And I don't really like that dancing in the air, you know?

[Andrew Santino]

Did you have. Did you have a hotel with a bathtub?

[Bobby Lee]

Because I had a combo. You see at the hotel Zoe.

[Andrew Santino]

The Zoe.

[Bobby Lee]

The Zoe?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Because it's not Zoe.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't know.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I did that last time. I didn't this time. But it's a combo tub shower.

[Bobby Lee]

It's. I don't like it. But you know what I do like and it's polite. Okay, sometimes it's a combo shower bath. But if you want to take a shower, you have to actually go in the tub and do the shower and then you get wet, get out. But you know what? This clever friend has a little window.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, you put your arm through.

[Bobby Lee]

You are put your arm through and you open it.

[Andrew Santino]

I remember that.

[Bobby Lee]

You remember that?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, that's right.

[Bobby Lee]

And it's a clever little zozo.

[Andrew Santino]

Smart.

[Bobby Lee]

I like it.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't like the shower tubs cuz I feel like I'm going to slip. And that is exactly how I die. I'm already prone to slipping in bathrooms. Hitting my head.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, we've heard the story.

[Andrew Santino]

I know I don't need to do it. And they have earthquakes up there. Imagine.

[Bobby Lee]

I imagine.

[Andrew Santino]

Imagine have happened to me twice.

[Bobby Lee]

But. But I hadn't been in Back to Cobbs. That was the time. That was the last time I was there. When is when Ken Jeong attacked me in the green room.

[Andrew Santino]

How long ago is this?

[Bobby Lee]

Like 15 years ago. So I pointed to all my openers. This is where it happened. And I positioned the chairs. He turned around like this.

[Andrew Santino]

How nice is Cobbs?

[Bobby Lee]

I honestly. And then I did. After that, I did a MySpace corporate show with Al Madrigal.

[Andrew Santino]

Wow.

[Bobby Lee]

Ian Edwards. Natasha Leggero It's. It's. Ask everyone that works there. When I got off stage, I started to cry. I bombed so bad. And then I went to the kitchen.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, MySpace isn't even around anymore, is it?

[Bobby Lee]

That's how long ago was. And I got on my hands and knees, and I vowed to the gods I'll never play her again. I've always had bad luck there at Cobbs or. Yeah. So I haven't been there for, like, 15 years.

[Andrew Santino]

MySpace is still active.

[Bobby Lee]

It's still active, Yeah. I wonder what my page looks like.

[Andrew Santino]

Go to Bobby Leon. MySpace. Let's see what that looks like.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't think I. There's no way they got a guy. They got rid of it. They got rid of it.

[Andrew Santino]

It's gone.

[Bobby Lee]

Johan's profile picture.

[Andrew Santino]

Johan Propile P. You never had MySpace, did you?

[Jules]

I had. My aunt made it for me, but I just didn't know what to do.

[Bobby Lee]

They didn't have Internet back then, so they had to physically make it. They physically make a space for. This is my. On it.

[Andrew Santino]

This MySpace.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah. And she sits in a little hole.

[Andrew Santino]

They just go around all day.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Around Subu, going, that's my space. That's my space.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah. And then. Do you draw your friends? Right. Your top 10. You draw the face on the walls. On the wall.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

It's really good. Yeah. With fire. Yeah. So it's cool.

[Andrew Santino]

Tell me what's been going on in your life, Jules? I am interested to know. Well, by the way, look at this. Look at this. Look. Hold on. Look at my finger.

[Bobby Lee]

What's going on with you?

[Andrew Santino]

It's been doing this. Look at him.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, my God. He has that disease.

[Jules]

Parkinson's.

[Andrew Santino]

Give me back that polar plunge money. What's been going on?

[Jules]

I'm graduating this May, so if you guys want to come.

[Bobby Lee]

No, we don't want to come to your graduation. I'm going.

[Andrew Santino]

Of course we want to go. What do we talk? Of course we want to. We'll do.

[Bobby Lee]

We wear a suit. What do we happen. You know what? We'll. You know, we're just like Men in Black.

[Jules]

No.

[Bobby Lee]

Just. Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

No. You know what we'll do? We'll get the suits from Dumb and Dumber.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Can we wear those? Let's pull.

[Bobby Lee]

We're going to be bright.

[Andrew Santino]

I want to wear that.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm going to bleach my hair. I want Wear funny goggles.

[Andrew Santino]

Dude. Dumb and Dumber suits. Can we.

[Bobby Lee]

Can we.

[Andrew Santino]

Look at that. You and me. That's 100. We have to wear.

[Bobby Lee]

We're going to dress up. That's you and me. Are you going to really do that, though?

[Andrew Santino]

I'll do it with you.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, let's do it.

[Jules]

Okay. It's on May. So I'll get your take on May.

[Bobby Lee]

Well.

[Andrew Santino]

So school worked well.

[Jules]

Can I tell you in May?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, May. Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

So it's in May.

[Jules]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And then is there an after party? I mean, I'm not going unless there's an after party. There's no party.

[Jules]

No.

[Andrew Santino]

You have to throw a party. That's.

[Bobby Lee]

How about boba milk tea? You love that.

[Andrew Santino]

A little boba tea party. You know what?

[Bobby Lee]

We'll set it up.

[Andrew Santino]

We'll get a boba truck.

[Bobby Lee]

Boba truck. Boba milk party.

[Andrew Santino]

Let's do that.

[Jules]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

That sounds fun. Look at that. That's what we want to do. We want to party and you got to throw.

[Bobby Lee]

And then three years from now, from the sodas. They work at Chipotle. That's mean.

[Andrew Santino]

Underneath, there should just say corn or flour. Right. Underneath.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm off today. I'm off today.

[Andrew Santino]

You're getting back.

[Bobby Lee]

Getting back.

[Andrew Santino]

You're fine. We're going to hum right into it. So what are you going to write on your. On your cap? You have to write like an inspirational quote. You know that, Right, right. I mean, people do that. That's like a thing, right? They write something inspirational on their. On the top of their hat. We're all stories in the end. Just make it a good one. A Canadian.

[Bobby Lee]

Canadian, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Count all of your blessings. Something. Your dreams. I can't say. Remember your dreams. Jimmy Buffett said that. A man of many quotes. It is 5 o'clock somewhere.

[Bobby Lee]

I want negative ones, though, you know? I mean, create chaos like a joker. What a joke. What would joker say? What? Like into the joker.

[Andrew Santino]

It is so in. Sally.

[Bobby Lee]

Eat the rich. No.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Eat the rich.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

That's so funny to write that on your cap. They're gonna frisk her. Then they're gonna think she's gonna shoot up the graduation. I mean, you're already wearing a long gown.

[Bobby Lee]

What would a Korean joker feel like?

[Andrew Santino]

Korean joker?

[Bobby Lee]

A Korean joker. Where we were at?

[Andrew Santino]

Enjoy the kimchi.

[Bobby Lee]

Enjoy Kimchi. Where we're at.

[Andrew Santino]

He poisoned the kimchi at graduation.

[Bobby Lee]

You know what I'm saying when I say we were. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

What?

[Bobby Lee]

Riddler.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, where? River.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah, where we were at.

[Andrew Santino]

What happened? There was a Korean. There was actually a Korean joker.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. He was targeting fentanyl, a feminist group.

[Andrew Santino]

So he was an anti. No, no. Activist. Harassed and targeted by anti feminist groups. He kept following us and shouting. We were terrified.

[Bobby Lee]

We were in South Korea.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

That's insane. We support the women. We really do.

[Andrew Santino]

Crazy. Did you get in San Francisco?

[Bobby Lee]

No. What happened was this. And I did one of my old school, high school tricks. Oh, you want to guess what it is? I'll talk about it.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. You show up to the party.

[Bobby Lee]

There's no party.

[Andrew Santino]

High on drugs.

[Bobby Lee]

No, no, no.

[Andrew Santino]

Go in the corner. You masturbate, you go home.

[Bobby Lee]

No, you go cute. You go cute.

[Andrew Santino]

You go cutesy poo, right?

[Bobby Lee]

So what happened was she came to a show. So there's this girl I met years ago on Instagram. Pretty, very pretty. And then she kind of like disappeared from the DMs. But then she's like, can I get a ticket? Because they're sold out, right? So I get her in. I do come up. You. Some high school friends came up. Then she comes up. And then I invite her to dinner with the gang, and we go to the dinner. And then I kissed. That show, for some reason, 10 dudes from stage.

[Andrew Santino]

You don't kiss 10 dudes with us.

[Bobby Lee]

I know, but I did.

[Andrew Santino]

10 guys.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. I just. Everyone would do it.

[Andrew Santino]

Wow.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then she was like, how come you don't kiss me? So in the car, right? I made her drive by. I go, let's just do a kiss, right? I went like that. We kissed like that.

[Andrew Santino]

A pack.

[Bobby Lee]

It's just a pack. And I go, let's do it again, right?

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, a little stronger pack.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, let's do it again.

[Andrew Santino]

Little Gregory pack.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Samuel French.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. You Pearl harbor it, Right, right? And then we just made out the whole time in the car.

[Andrew Santino]

Whoa. How long is a make out now?

[Bobby Lee]

In 2025.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, here's the deal. Well, here's why I don't get the.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't know.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

No, I don't. I don't know. Like, because if I'm making out with my wife, it's because we're going to. We're hooking up. You're making out as a setup. I'm saying how.

[Bobby Lee]

No, I'm making up because, remember, I haven't been jerking off, right?

[Andrew Santino]

What do you. Now you're loaded for a month.

[Bobby Lee]

Like 12 days or whatever.

[Andrew Santino]

Pretty good, right?

[Bobby Lee]

Not last night.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, you had to, right?

[Bobby Lee]

And then my penis went. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Old boy Dave woke up.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. I wouldn't have like, let's Go black eye, whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then. And when you. You know, when you're. When you're making out with somebody, it. You know, your body, it's just biological.

[Andrew Santino]

Right, right.

[Bobby Lee]

You're just super horny.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, that's the. That's the. That's the.

[Bobby Lee]

And I just. You know. Four palms and a marshmallow came out. Yeah. It was so thick, it hurt. It's like wood glue coming out of your beard. It hurts so bad. And it was just. It was like all. It was like a cancping batter. Yeah, yeah. Like, am I Aunt Jemima? What's going on around here? Dude, it was like, you know, it was like. You're right.

[Andrew Santino]

I know you. I know you meant pancake, but you said can cake, and. And somehow can cake is thicker than it is.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I meant to say can cake.

[Andrew Santino]

Pancake batter.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. Can cake batter is the best. What is can cake?

[Andrew Santino]

So wait a minute. Little kissy session. And then never talk to her again. That's it?

[Bobby Lee]

I don't know.

[Andrew Santino]

Maybe more.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, you know. And this is a message to everybody. You're high, huh? Me? Yeah. Why are you giggling at that then? Because of. Andre's made me laugh. Okay. So may I make a message to the women? You may.

[Andrew Santino]

Ladies and gentlemen, a message for the women.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm ready for a relationship.

[Andrew Santino]

He wants to settle down, but the.

[Bobby Lee]

Dam has to break.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't know what that means.

[Bobby Lee]

What?

[Andrew Santino]

I don't know what that means.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, I'm a poet.

[Andrew Santino]

I know.

[Bobby Lee]

And so just figure out what that means.

[Andrew Santino]

All right, Hemingway. Let me think.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

The dam has to break means.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Oh, that's right.

[Andrew Santino]

I get it.

[Bobby Lee]

What is it?

[Andrew Santino]

You want a squirter? Is that.

[Bobby Lee]

No, this is part of it.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. No, what I'm saying is, is that. I think I use the wrong terminology.

[Andrew Santino]

I think so.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. I think so. Yeah. What?

[Jules]

Your penis has to break?

[Bobby Lee]

No, no, no, no, no, no.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, you do have to break them in, like, a new pair of shoes.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You got to break in that wiener.

[Bobby Lee]

No, I mean, just the. The next person I like and that I. Intimacy and stuff. I think I might go for it for longtermy.

[Andrew Santino]

Really?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

But it's got to be the one.

[Bobby Lee]

It's got to be the one. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You're ready? Ready?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Because, you know, some people treat me like I'm still open mic or Bob, who's that? Open micro.

[Andrew Santino]

Bob, who treats you that way? You mean women 30 years ago?

[Bobby Lee]

What?

[Andrew Santino]

You mean women?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't treat no one.

[Bobby Lee]

They're just always like, yeah, like, you know, I can do better. Oh, that kind of mentality. And I'm like, I don't think so.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't think so.

[Bobby Lee]

No way. You can. What? You can do better than the comedian in LA. It's like the city where Leonardo DiCaprio lives. You can do better. Yeah. Like, if you're dating celebrities, like, you can go way higher.

[Andrew Santino]

He's shooting today. I could tell. He came with a couple loaded. He's ready.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. He's like such a handsome guy. I. I understand what you're saying, dude.

[Andrew Santino]

Have you ever had Chamilay's can cake battery?

[Bobby Lee]

No, I would. Exactly.

[Andrew Santino]

I would. Yeah, I know.

[Bobby Lee]

I would too.

[Andrew Santino]

Fucking perfect.

[Bobby Lee]

I would. I would have it. But I want to say, let me direct. Direct to you. Okay, that's rude.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

And what I'm saying is, is that Leo's one guy, right? And he wants. I know, but he wants 25 or younger and supermodel like you. That's not my demographic. No, I'm. I'm. The girl that I made out with last night was 33.

[Andrew Santino]

That's good.

[Bobby Lee]

Do you understand what I'm saying?

[Andrew Santino]

Mature.

[Dave Blunts]

I understand.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. You understand what I'm saying? So it's like, you know, I'm not. It's not the same pool that we're fishing from. Emperor. Yeah. What I'm saying to you is that I've seen your pool as well. Okay. And I can expose some stuff. I can expose stuff about you as well. Right. I went out with this guy, flew out all the way to New York.

[Dave Blunts]

Oh, my God.

[Andrew Santino]

Also, first of all, you're in a pool, you're in a pond. Let's be very.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, exactly. Thank you so, so much. Right.

[Andrew Santino]

Also, but also, you flew to New York to go see somebody. That's why you went to New York. I wonder why you left.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, exactly. Well, actually, I told you before.

[Andrew Santino]

Wait, no, you told me you were going out there but not to see somebody.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Oh, yeah, that's right. I was. And I want to say, like, Ali Wong in her book. Ali Wong in her book, Right. She says she has a book. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, I didn't know that.

[Bobby Lee]

There's a little paragraph about me.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, that's so nice.

[Bobby Lee]

And then when she came to la, I didn't hit on her. I showed her around, right. I met her places and I go, this is where you eat. This is where the good clubs. This and that. Right?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

I showed them the ropes. There's no sexual intention There. And you know that, that, that's what I'm like. All my openers are women and they're all just friends.

[Andrew Santino]

So you, so what you're doing right.

[Bobby Lee]

Now, what you're doing is hiding in plain sight. Like Predator. Just like Predator. Yeah. Yeah. Just like Predator. The movie Ship station Lie. Live, live. Life in general, it can be chaotic.

[Andrew Santino]

It can.

[Bobby Lee]

But if you're in charge of order fulfillment for an E commerce you know that its own special kind of chaos. But with Shipstation you can count on the day to day remaining calm.

[Andrew Santino]

That's right. You can save hours of money every month by shipping from all your stores with one login automating repetitive tasks and finding the best rates among all global carriers. We, we have merch on the store. Have merch and we get it to you. Thanks to ShipStation. If it weren't for Shipstation you wouldn't be able to get it so quickly and conveniently.

[Bobby Lee]

Over 130,000 companies have grown their e commerce business with ShipStation. And 98% of companies that stick with Shipstation for a year become customers for life.

[Andrew Santino]

Check it. The fastest, most affordable way to ship products to your customers. Discounts. Up to 88% off UPS, DHL Express and USPS rates and up to 90% off FedEx rates. That is incredible. If you own a business of any kind, no matter what the scaling is tiny tiny tiny Tim or big big big Biggie, you got to be able to use them because they are going to help you and you never need to upgrade. Shipstation grows with your business no matter how big it gets calm the chaos.

[Bobby Lee]

Of order fulfillment with the Shipstation software that delivers. Switch to Shipstation today.

[Andrew Santino]

Go to shipstation.com and use the code Bad friends to sign up for your that shipstation.com code Bad friends Talk space Therapy can be costly, okay. But TalkSpace is affordable and in network with most insurance providers and most insured members have a $0 copay. Bobby and I both like to talk to somebody.

[Bobby Lee]

We do and I want to.

[Andrew Santino]

Nice.

[Bobby Lee]

I honestly believe that TalkSpace is the best in the business when it comes to this kind of form of therapy. Talkspace therapy and psychiatry are covered by many insurance plans and employers. Most insured members have a zero dollar copay.

[Andrew Santino]

You want to talk to a therapist from the comfort of your own home, your own couch, your own bathtub, your own patio, your balcony, your rooftop, your front lawn, your car, your truck, your van or your favorite little coffee shop. You can do it from all those hovercraft and your Hovercraft. By the way, they're hovercraft friendly. Talkspace is the leading virtual therapy provider. They make getting the help that you need easy, accessible and affordable. You got to try it. Okay?

[Bobby Lee]

As a listener of this podcast, you'll get $80 off your first month with Talkspace when you go to talkspace.com BadFriends Enter promo COD Space 80 to match.

[Andrew Santino]

With a licensed therapist today. Go to talkspace.com Bad Friends and enter promo code Space80 to get $80 off your first month and show your support for the show. That's talkspace.com Bad Friends promo code Space 80 True Classic Look I'm not somebody who likes to go shopping a lot. I don't like to pick all these new styles and all this stuff. Sometimes I like to get back to the basics. The good old basics, the tried and true. And true classic has that in spades.

[Bobby Lee]

If James Dean As Team McQueen was still alive, that's all they've been wearing is true classic.

[Andrew Santino]

It's a fact.

[Bobby Lee]

Because they're classic men.

[Andrew Santino]

Classic men who love basic stuff. Simple, clean spring essentials. You know the Pima crew. The short sleeve comfort knit button up. The chino shorts are great too. And the six inch swim trunks look, I have so much of this stuff. I wear it to the gym, I wear it during the day. I wear it to a meeting, I wear it to a dinner. You can dress them up, dress them down. Premium clothes at an affordable price. You can build the perfect outfit in five minutes or less and everything goes great together. That's the best part about simple clean classics.

[Bobby Lee]

Free shipping on all orders. 100% perfect fit guarantee with easy returns. Trusted by over 4 million customers and 200,000 5 star reviews.

[Andrew Santino]

The more you bundle, the more you save. The best selling T shirts, hoodies, jeans and more come in three, six and nine packs. Get it as a group. Why do you need to keep going back to find new stuff? Cut it out. Get something trusted, simple, clean and wonderful. Whether you're building up for the cold or getting ready for the spring, level up your style with clothes that actually fit right. Just go to my exclusive link [e-mail] bad friends to save.

[Bobby Lee]

That's true classic.com bad friends shop now and elevate your wardrobe today.

[Andrew Santino]

You're jet setting now because of the show, of course. And it's great and I'm proud of you.

[Bobby Lee]

Thank you. I do want it can end.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh Bob.

[Bobby Lee]

What?

[Andrew Santino]

Well, let the emperor speak.

[Bobby Lee]

You know I treat you like a peer all of you guys.

[Andrew Santino]

Maybe. Maybe better than a peer.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Like Alex Costa. You know him?

[Andrew Santino]

No clue.

[Bobby Lee]

All right. He works for me. What, on tiger belly Alex, Why? We go into Patagonia yesterday, and I'm gonna buy something. He goes, bob, can I buy something? Buy me something. I go, yeah. And I go to this register, and I'm bringing things in, and it's $600. And the thing I bought was 80.

[Andrew Santino]

What did he buy?

[Bobby Lee]

This complex winter jacket. Yeah, right.

[Andrew Santino]

You bought it, though.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, you did. Yeah, yeah. I was so livid. Right. And what I'm saying is you guys treat me like that, too, like we're peers. I want to say this to you, right? And it's not a threat. It's an order. Right?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

This is Trump and Zelensky. It's. I'm Zelensky. I'm Zelensky, for sure. Oh, yeah, you attack me first. No, this is. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You're Putin. I like that. Yeah, yeah, you do.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. You're closer to.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, you're closer to Putin. So what I'm saying to you is that I love you. Right? I love you, too. But it could end. The dream could end. I'm aware. Yeah. Yeah. You, too, McCone. And you too me.

[Andrew Santino]

He's actually been good.

[Bobby Lee]

He's great.

[Andrew Santino]

And also, let's be real about the Patagonia jacket. You loved buying that. You love that. You know you did, because it's a power move now. Now you have that over that kid. Remember when I bought you that jacket and shoes? That's what I'm saying. You're gonna. You're gonna use that as. That's chat. You play chess, a lot of people look at you and think checkers. Chinese.

[Bobby Lee]

No, no. No one thinks checkers. Everyone thinks chess. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Or my gal, or whatever.

[Andrew Santino]

Pai go.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

A lot of people look at you and they think, pai gow.

[Bobby Lee]

Pai go. Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

But you're actually playing savant level street Russian opening chess.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Seriously, you are. Because he's done this since I've known him a ca.

[Bobby Lee]

You know, what I'm saying is.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. And you have little pawns all over the place. Yeah, Right? And you're the queen. You are the queen, and you've always been the queen.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm the king.

[Andrew Santino]

Nobody. You're the queen.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm the queen.

[Andrew Santino]

The queen is by far the most powerful piece in chess.

[Bobby Lee]

All right?

[Andrew Santino]

You should know that. You play chess. I'm the king.

[Bobby Lee]

You're the king, okay? You're the king.

[Andrew Santino]

Because we're partners.

[Bobby Lee]

Bishop. Andreas.

[Andrew Santino]

Rook. Rook.

[Dave Blunts]

Rook.

[Andrew Santino]

Rook.

[Bobby Lee]

He's a rook. He's a rook.

[Andrew Santino]

That's a.

[Bobby Lee]

All Rick's.

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, no, no.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

But con is a pawn.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, yeah. Pawn. Pawn. Yeah, yeah. What is Carlos.

[Andrew Santino]

You know, honestly.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Knight.

[Andrew Santino]

He might be a knight.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Because he goes. He lies.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh. He deceives.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. You know, I mean. Yeah. What is she? She's the bishop. Angles.

[Andrew Santino]

A bishop.

[Bobby Lee]

Angle.

[Andrew Santino]

Angles. Angles.

[Bobby Lee]

Angles. Angles.

[Andrew Santino]

Precise. Attacked. Watch this, watch this, watch this. That's how good she is at attacks and angles. Ready?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You have the floor.

[Jules]

Your mom's a hoe.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay. See, it's an attacked ang. You little.

[Bobby Lee]

That was so good.

[Andrew Santino]

You little.

[Bobby Lee]

You're a good, though.

[Andrew Santino]

So she is.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're. That was Bishop moves there. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

So we have it all figured out in the studio.

[Bobby Lee]

He's so mad at you. You don't know about this guy. Those little things, they seep into us.

[Andrew Santino]

You know what's really funny?

[Bobby Lee]

Look at it. Look how red his face is.

[Andrew Santino]

You know what's funny?

[Jules]

You said to attack.

[Andrew Santino]

I know. I. I could never be mad at you.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, it really.

[Andrew Santino]

It kind of sucks.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, it sucks.

[Andrew Santino]

Like, if one of the clowns did it.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I would. It would be a fight.

[Bobby Lee]

Do you remember when she was mad at us?

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

The most heartbreaking two weeks. I broke my heart.

[Andrew Santino]

It really did hurt.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. What hurt?

[Andrew Santino]

My feeling.

[Bobby Lee]

What? Your mom's a hoe.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Yeah. It just settled.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Just settle. Right now. I see the river is.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm mad.

[Bobby Lee]

It was. I knew. No, that was good.

[Andrew Santino]

No. Never in a million years.

[Bobby Lee]

Wow. But you planted a sea. Congratulations.

[Andrew Santino]

Very good. It was very good.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah. Very good. And you know what? Another thing you do that drives me crazy, my friend. What? Since we're doing this.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Get it out.

[Bobby Lee]

Why is it when I recommend you something, you never watch it, but when anyone else recommends it, you watch it?

[Jules]

Like what?

[Bobby Lee]

Like I've been asking you to watch different things and you don't watch it.

[Jules]

And I've been telling you, see.

[Bobby Lee]

What? Right now. Notice. Did you notice?

[Andrew Santino]

I saw.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. I've been telling you that. Yeah, go ahead.

[Jules]

I've been telling you I'm busy and I'm so tired that I can't watch any show.

[Bobby Lee]

It's so funny. Can I kind of counteract that?

[Jules]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

You live with me. Yeah, Right. Do I have ears?

[Jules]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Do I hear you playing down there? Oh, wow. You know what I mean? All kinds of Asian shit 24 hours a day. And she's giggling. Right, right, right. And I recommend nothing.

[Andrew Santino]

Nothing.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Jules]

It's Tick tock. It's different.

[Andrew Santino]

It is. That is.

[Bobby Lee]

Don't ever raise your voice like that to me. Okay? Why is it different?

[Jules]

Because you can just scroll. You don't have to think about. You don't have to actually, like, watch it. It's just scrolling.

[Andrew Santino]

I got it. Well, I gotta stop my tick. My tick tock time is bad.

[Bobby Lee]

It's consumes my life one day.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm not going to lie. I did six hours.

[Bobby Lee]

I do too.

[Andrew Santino]

That's a lot.

[Bobby Lee]

It's a lot.

[Andrew Santino]

The whole. Anytime I'm on a flight and it has wi fi.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. I'm tick tocking then that the government has us. Well, Want to enslave us.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, the good government, the Chinese government. The good one.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The one we love. Yeah. Back then they did it with religion. Right.

[Andrew Santino]

Now they're doing a tick tock.

[Bobby Lee]

Now they're doing with tick tock and capitalism.

[Andrew Santino]

Get ready with me.

[Bobby Lee]

And we're all slaves. Right? And I love it.

[Andrew Santino]

Get ready with me to become a Chinese slave.

[Bobby Lee]

I love being a Chinese slave.

[Andrew Santino]

Me too. We're there.

[Bobby Lee]

Nezah. Did you see it?

[Jules]

The what?

[Bobby Lee]

Neza.

[Andrew Santino]

He recommended Neza. You didn't watch that, did you? No.

[Bobby Lee]

Neza 2 is out. Okay. It made $2 billion in China. It's the greatest animation movie I've ever seen.

[Andrew Santino]

You better watch before they make a third one.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

What did you say? Did we ever. What?

[Jules]

Did you guys ever download the other.

[Bobby Lee]

Tick Tock app, Red Zone or whatever it was. Red line. Yeah. Red pipes. What is it?

[Jules]

The. What is it? It's the Red Note.

[Andrew Santino]

Red note.

[Bobby Lee]

So was I close?

[Jules]

It's.

[Bobby Lee]

When I said Redline was like.

[Andrew Santino]

Did you hear that? It's already in Chinese.

[Bobby Lee]

It's all in Chinese. Was that close?

[Jules]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Thank you.

[Andrew Santino]

It's named as a Chinese social media app that allows users to share and discover different content about fashion, travel and more. Similar to Instagram with a layout similar to Pinterest.

[Bobby Lee]

There was a Mongolian guy my show and I kissed him in the lips. Yeah. And he had. He just gave. Came here from Mongolia and he stood up in Petrified. He goes, I don't know what going on. Like, he was like, I don't know what going on.

[Andrew Santino]

Imagine a Mongolian guy who's like, literally never been to the United States. That's his first trip.

[Bobby Lee]

Look at that. Look at Them. They're all data from Goonies. They're still thrust like that. That. What a peaceful life. Don't you want to do this with me?

[Andrew Santino]

Dude, zoom in. That's so funny. Look, I just realized. Look at his hat. I realized why they like Spider Man.

[Bobby Lee]

Why?

[Andrew Santino]

Look at those eyes. That's the closest superhero they have.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Might as well do a Mongolian ch. Spider Man. Might as well do it. There's a window open. Let's go. Sp. Come on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, and there's no buildings or trees. Yeah. So they're doing trees. There may be trees. Yeah, yeah, trees. Spot on, spot on.

[Andrew Santino]

From tree to tree. You will see. Anyway, this Mongolian Spider man, that is kind of. It does make sense when you see the vast. Now, I've never even thought about that.

[Bobby Lee]

Wow. Yeah. Oh, what a cute guy.

[Andrew Santino]

There was Chinese Spider Man. Yeah. Asian Spider man is out there.

[Bobby Lee]

That's so cute.

[Andrew Santino]

All right, so what else in your life, Jules, I want to hear what's going on besides you being tired, which is the narrative that's been happening for the five years I've known you.

[Jules]

I'm just living with you to Bobby because of the fires.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Jules]

I have all the dogs, school, work.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, I could see you working at, like, Chick Fil A, and that would help us because I'd like to eat it more often for free.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Jules]

I also want to do that for free food.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, then go get a job at Chick Fil A. There's one near here.

[Jules]

Well, I need a visa. Oh, yeah, the. Can you buy the 5 million gold visa for me?

[Andrew Santino]

What does that mean? Trump says giving us will sell 5 million gold dollar. Wait, sell $5 million gold card to wealthy foreigners. So you have to pay $5 million?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. And then you get a really easy path to citizenship. But apparently it's not even that much money for a lot of people. So it's going to attract, like, grifters.

[Andrew Santino]

$5 million is not much money.

[Bobby Lee]

Every the richest has a gold visa, which is like, if you invest enough money in the country, you're going, well.

[Andrew Santino]

I understand that, but this is just your buy outright, buying a visa for 5 million. If you're an entrepreneur who's invested and has work here, then it's different. But this is. You just pay 5 million, buy a.

[Bobby Lee]

House or whatever it is.

[Andrew Santino]

Wow.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, but the guy that's doing the rice on his head, you know, I mean, he can't go if he had.

[Andrew Santino]

A dollar for every grain.

[Bobby Lee]

That's true. That is true. That's true.

[Andrew Santino]

We're going to be selling a gold card. I love that. It's a gold card.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. It's crazy.

[Andrew Santino]

You have a. If you have a green card, this is a gold card. I love. Dude, he puts everything in toddler perspective. You have a green card. This is a gold card.

[Bobby Lee]

But do you know why he's doing this? Because Elon Musk and the tech stuff, remember?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. And so you mean all the Doge shit?

[Bobby Lee]

What?

[Andrew Santino]

All the Doge stuff, like the Doge employees that are clearing out the government.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But there's a lot of tech people from other lands. And then Trump goes, I don't know. You know, I mean. And he got. He got. There was a controversy. So now I think this is a way for them to get in.

[Andrew Santino]

$5 million is insane. So you're telling me enough people. That's a very limited amount of people that have $5 million laying around.

[Bobby Lee]

That's why they do it.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, but I mean. But then it's like a tease. No one's ever gonna. How many people can really do it? I mean, I guess Chinese money may be a lot. There's a lot of billionaires in China. Doesn't China have the most billionaires in the world?

[Bobby Lee]

They have those people.

[Andrew Santino]

I know. No, but even still, per capita, they have the most billionaires.

[Bobby Lee]

Really?

[Andrew Santino]

By far. I. We don't even have that many. We have the most billionaires. We do.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, wow. We're the best. Holy.

[Bobby Lee]

There's Indian billionaires do it. What?

[Andrew Santino]

I am the curry king.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, that's it.

[Andrew Santino]

I will be a billionaire. Wealth and technology, pharmaceuticals and energy.

[Bobby Lee]

Wow.

[Andrew Santino]

Wow. Germany, we made a lot of mistakes.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

But we're back.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Russia, of course. We stole this money and killed. We get. They killed for all that money.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Wow.

[Andrew Santino]

Russia will kill you.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Well.

[Andrew Santino]

813 billionaires.

[Bobby Lee]

Do you want that card? Really?

[Andrew Santino]

I was wrong.

[Bobby Lee]

I thought if we. If we give. What would. What would you do for us? If we got you a five million dollar gold card?

[Andrew Santino]

And let me preface this by saying we're not doing it.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, but what.

[Jules]

Well, if you were gonna do it, what would happen?

[Bobby Lee]

You do this podcast.

[Andrew Santino]

You're basically every week buying her. That's like a buy. You bought a human.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, that's like.

[Andrew Santino]

You would buy a human. Which, by the way, you know, this is going to enact human trafficking for sure. That's inevitable of what this is going to do. There's no way this is a positive program.

[Bobby Lee]

Sucks.

[Andrew Santino]

So what? Yeah. What could you Even offer us if Bobby and I got a bunch of investors to give us enough money to pay for you to become a 5 million dollar gold card citizen. What do we get in return?

[Jules]

I can. I can clean, I can cook, I can wash the dishes.

[Bobby Lee]

You've never cooked me anything, bitch.

[Andrew Santino]

Because you never asked.

[Bobby Lee]

You know, kick me one thing. Today I woke up from my nap. Bacon. Are you cooking bacon? Yeah, yeah. Bacon throughout my house.

[Jules]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

None for me.

[Andrew Santino]

You cook bacon and don't leave extra. No, that's insane.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, it's insane.

[Andrew Santino]

That's crazy.

[Bobby Lee]

Another thing she does is do you not like me because I've. Even when we live together, we never see each other.

[Andrew Santino]

That's because I wake up in the.

[Jules]

Morning, you wake up at night, you don't see each other.

[Andrew Santino]

There is fact.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. But even when you're there, trust me, you don't leave. And what do I give you? Donuts. Old fairy donuts. Right?

[Jules]

Like the pistachio.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know. Guess what you've gotten me as a gift? Zero.

[Andrew Santino]

A burden.

[Bobby Lee]

A burden.

[Andrew Santino]

You're a burden. Trust me. Light. Let me ask you something. Everyone in the room. When you cook bacon at home, you cook the whole package.

[Bobby Lee]

No.

[Andrew Santino]

What? What the fuck are you talking about?

[Bobby Lee]

What are you talking about?

[Andrew Santino]

You don't cook the whole thing.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm gonna eat 15 strips.

[Andrew Santino]

I am.

[Bobby Lee]

I know.

[Andrew Santino]

No, but I mean, what do you know? What you do is you cook the whole thing and then you have. You have some for the dogs and then you have some in the fridge that you make later with a sandwich so it's cooked already.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, that's. I never thought of that.

[Andrew Santino]

This. It's the best.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

Every time I do it, you cook the whole. You don't do this.

[Bobby Lee]

I do it. I microwave my bacon.

[Andrew Santino]

Maybe this is some Midwest. I've never been into a house back in the day when we were growing up. Yeah, you always had to have extra bacon because what she's doing is violating you. She's cooking in your home, not leaving leftovers for you.

[Bobby Lee]

It's a complete violation.

[Andrew Santino]

It's a complete violin.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I agree.

[Andrew Santino]

It's a complete violates. You cook the whole sleeve. You leave some for Tito, you give.

[Bobby Lee]

Some for the dog, some to bacon. Tito Bobby.

[Andrew Santino]

No, but rapper, rapper, rapper, rapper.

[Jules]

Tito Bobby doesn't even eat like cold stuff already.

[Andrew Santino]

You heat it up.

[Jules]

No, even then he doesn't eat leftovers once.

[Bobby Lee]

It's like. Oh my God.

[Andrew Santino]

There it is.

[Bobby Lee]

The. I don't. I don't. I don't I. I don't. I don't. I don't.

[Andrew Santino]

Baseline fact.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't.

[Bobby Lee]

But don't say it out loud.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Don't tell anybody that.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

No, but honestly, you cook the whole sleeve. Maybe that's in the Midwest. Because every house you go to, they would cook the whole sleeve. You absolutely wouldn't save it. It doesn't make any sense. Also, once you've opened the package of bacon, slimy, sloppy, greasy bacon, you put it in the thing. It's a thing. It's a spill, It's a thing. It's a fridge. It's a nightmare. Don't do it. Cook the whole sleeve. From now on, you cook the whole packet and you go, tita, Bobby, I cook your bacon and you give some to the dogs. Or do you not feed the dogs bacon?

[Bobby Lee]

I love who. Let me ask you another question. Who gives the dogs treats?

[Jules]

You.

[Bobby Lee]

Exactly. Do you buy any treats?

[Jules]

They already have their food.

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, no.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. She's doing Filipino rules.

[Andrew Santino]

That's insane.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. And we're in America.

[Andrew Santino]

Get one meal a day.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I know. That's what it is.

[Andrew Santino]

You have to understand the dog's food. The dog's food is to keep it alive. Treats are to keep it happy and engaged.

[Bobby Lee]

Exactly.

[Jules]

I just give it like once a week.

[Andrew Santino]

What?

[Bobby Lee]

It's insane. And also, she measures the food. You only get this £2. Whatever. She. You. You weigh it. You weigh it. I don't want them to be fat.

[Jules]

I don't want them to be.

[Bobby Lee]

We have doggos epic now.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, they do. They make it, right. What's up, Waggovi?

[Bobby Lee]

They have Wag. Yeah, we have govi.

[Andrew Santino]

Let me tell you something. Yeah, that's up. You've got to feed dogs treats. That keeps them happy and engaged.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Trust me. My fear is when they. She leaves one day with the dogs and they. They look at me with sad eyes.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

A2. You know what I mean? Bye. Bye. Yeah. Yeah. I feel so sad about it.

[Andrew Santino]

You know what you're basically doing? It's like when a prisoner, they slide the meal through the door slot.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Giving them regimented door slot. They're not even satisfied by that. That's so they can get through the day. You gotta go get some more treats.

[Bobby Lee]

And I want to say another thing. Okay. Let me just say another thing. Okay. They move out of my house. Right. I have a dog, older dog named Remy.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, I know, right?

[Bobby Lee]

Perfectly walking. Spine, fine.

[Andrew Santino]

Fine. Spine, perfect.

[Bobby Lee]

Eyesight. The next time I see it right.

[Andrew Santino]

Broken.

[Bobby Lee]

Not just broken. 50 pounds less twisted spine.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh.

[Bobby Lee]

Legs, you know, I mean, gray eyes. I go, what are you doing?

[Andrew Santino]

You gave a dog spina bifida and made it go blind.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Give it some.

[Bobby Lee]

No treats, dude. That's why.

[Jules]

No, because he's just getting old.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay, you're right.

[Andrew Santino]

Do you ever give me.

[Bobby Lee]

Right.

[Andrew Santino]

Do you ever give the dog, like, peanut butter or anything like that?

[Jules]

Some. Sometimes.

[Andrew Santino]

God, dude. What? The joy. You're like ripping the joy of a dog.

[Jules]

There's a pill, though, that. Have you seen that you can extend the dog's life already.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm buying it already.

[Bobby Lee]

Get the pill.

[Andrew Santino]

Biohacking your dog's life sec. Oh, my God. Second drug for canine Healthy Lifespan Extension receives what? A grant. FDA support.

[Jules]

Oh, you can do it already.

[Andrew Santino]

Zoom in. A developmental drug that aims to extend the healthy lifespan of senior dogs has received an acceptance by the FDA center for Veterinary Medicine for.

[Bobby Lee]

Remy. We gotta get it now.

[Andrew Santino]

The drug is called loi. Targets age Related metabolic dysfunction and is also designed to improve quality of life in canines aged 10 years and older weighing at least 14 pounds. Remy's older than 10.

[Bobby Lee]

One pounds. One pound.

[Andrew Santino]

He's 10 pounds?

[Jules]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, then if you fed him some treats, maybe we could get him the LOL.

[Bobby Lee]

He has to be 12.

[Andrew Santino]

It says. What did it say? What did it say? It said 14.

[Bobby Lee]

You got a fat. Not Remy. Dude, I want to get her.

[Andrew Santino]

You got to get him that. You got to get it right.

[Bobby Lee]

You want Remy to live?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

We're going to fatten them up. Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

By the way, fat and happy is the way most people like to live.

[Bobby Lee]

They like to live like that.

[Jules]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

This is great. I want to buy this immediately. What a great.

[Bobby Lee]

How do you inject it? That you inject it or.

[Andrew Santino]

No, it seems like it's a pill, Right. Or it's something they chew on.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

By the way, I don't know if you ever have to give your dog pills. We just had to give her pills when we were back home because she was sick.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, no.

[Andrew Santino]

But by the way, impossible. She won't eat it. And we bury it in the treats and the food still knows it's in there. We'll eat all the treat and then spit out the pillow.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You're genius.

[Bobby Lee]

She's a genius.

[Andrew Santino]

It pissed me off. Yeah, she did it every time we buried it. Then I put it. Then I put it in a. Oh, my God. You know the Kong chew toy, you know?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And I put it in there with all Sorts of.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. She cleared it out around it and left the pill. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Little incredible.

[Bobby Lee]

Shopify. Oh, boy. Buddy, guess what?

[Andrew Santino]

What?

[Bobby Lee]

We have an online business and it would. We. It's incredible because we use Shopify.

[Andrew Santino]

That is why.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

By the way, nobody does selling better than Shopify. It' with the number one checkout on the planet, a lot of people go, hey man, I like aloe.

[Bobby Lee]

I love alo skims.

[Andrew Santino]

All birds, you know. And you think that's a good product, isn't it, Bob?

[Bobby Lee]

High grade product.

[Andrew Santino]

I'll tell you what.

[Bobby Lee]

What's what, guys?

[Andrew Santino]

This behind the business. That business is Shopify.

[Bobby Lee]

Nobody does selling better than Shopify. Home of the number one checkout on the planet. And the not so secret secret with shop pay that boosts conversions up to 50%.

[Andrew Santino]

That means way less carts are going to go abandoned and way more sales are going. Cha ching, cha ching. If you're into growing your business, your commerce platform better be ready to sell whenever, wherever your customers are scrolling and scrolling on the web, in your store, in their feed and everywhere in between.

[Bobby Lee]

Businesses that sell more sell on Shopify.

[Andrew Santino]

That's right.

[Bobby Lee]

Upgrade your business and get the same checkout as aloe and allbirds.

[Andrew Santino]

That's right.

[Bobby Lee]

Yep.

[Andrew Santino]

Sign up for your $1 per month trial period at shopify.com bad friends all.

[Bobby Lee]

Lowercase go to shopify.com bad friends to upgrade your selling today.

[Andrew Santino]

Shopify.com bad friends.

[Bobby Lee]

Adam and Eve. I love Adam and Eve. I'm telling you something. I'm not embarrassed by it, but I used gadgets.

[Andrew Santino]

You love gadgets and toys and gizmos, vibrations, suctions.

[Bobby Lee]

And I really enjoy my sexually. And I get it from Adam and Eve. Who wants better sex?

[Andrew Santino]

I do.

[Bobby Lee]

Who wants to start having better sex immediately?

[Andrew Santino]

That's what I was gonna say. I want it right now.

[Bobby Lee]

The best way to get started is to go to AdamAndEve.com right now.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay, well, I can't go because we're on the show. But Adam and Eve, for those that are listening, is offering 50 off just about any item plus free shipping, which includes rush processing. Do you need those anal beads now? You got to get on Adam and Eve right now. Doesn't matter how much you spend or what you buy, all will be packaged and sent discreetly for free and fast. So your neighbors don't know what you got. Unless you want to invite them over and show them bring more pleasure and.

[Bobby Lee]

Satisfaction into your bedroom. Just go to AdamAndEve.com and select any one item. It can be an Adventurous new toy or anything you desire. 50% off almost any item plus free shipping and plus rush processing.

[Andrew Santino]

Wow. This is an exclusive offer specific to the podcast, so be sure to use our code bad friends to get your discount. A hundred percent free shipping and get it fast. With rush processing. The code is bad friends.

[Bobby Lee]

Just enter code bad friends at checkout and get 50 of almost any item plus free shipping and rush processing.

[Andrew Santino]

That's bad friends. You know how to spell it? B A D F R I E N d [e-mail] this episode is brought.

[Bobby Lee]

To you by progressive insurance. Do you ever find yourself playing the budgeting game? Well, with the name your price tool from progressive, you can find options that fit your budget and potentially lower your bills. Try [e-mail] Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and.

[Andrew Santino]

Affiliates Price and coverage match limited by state law.

[Bobby Lee]

Not available in all states. Dude, welcome. Welcome.

[Andrew Santino]

Dude, my dog. Good to see you, bro.

[Bobby Lee]

See you, dude.

[Andrew Santino]

How are you, Pete? Good to meet you. By the way, that usually you say hi to people when you walk in and say.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, you don't walk in like. You're like a deer in the headlights.

[Andrew Santino]

Your boy Pete just walked in and he. And he starts, like, snooping around.

[Bobby Lee]

This.

[Andrew Santino]

Is this your dog? Is this like one of your closest friends?

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah, yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Do you have Chinese eyes?

[Andrew Santino]

First of all, first of all, welcome Dave Blunts to the show.

[Dave Blunts]

Thank you.

[Bobby Lee]

Dave Blunts. Give him a round of applause. You're a rapper.

[Andrew Santino]

You make fantastic. Make fantastic music.

[Dave Blunts]

The first rapper on here.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, we had MGK on the show. I don't know if you qualify him.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah, yeah, I qualify him for sure.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay. Very good. Yeah, he makes music in general, but you do just rap.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

But you. But you can.

[Dave Blunts]

A blending of genres.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, a blending of genre. And we'll say for the audience. I didn't get to see before he brought his friend Pete, Who's. Who's. Who's his boy who's snooping around.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah, hey, I. I told him to come in here first to check it out.

[Andrew Santino]

I feel you saying yeah. And you know, Pete did his job, but usually people say, hello, Pete didn't do that. Pete just aimlessly snuck around. And Pete's your second guy. So you had another white guy before him.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah, that's my manager. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Where did you find this white man?

[Dave Blunts]

He found me.

[Andrew Santino]

He found you?

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

That was pretty easy to do.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hell ye, Dave.

[Andrew Santino]

So you found this. This guy found you. And this is your. This is your new. Your new manager. He's with you every day?

[Dave Blunts]

Pretty much, yeah. Every day.

[Andrew Santino]

You trust this guy?

[Dave Blunts]

I do with my entire life. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I like to hear that.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

This is who. This is our manager. This is Rudy. Say hello to Rudy.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, Rudy, that's our manager. She's a genius.

[Andrew Santino]

She's a genius.

[Bobby Lee]

She was the head of Sony at one point. Well, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Dave Blunts]

Oh, this is like. It's like an emotion.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, yeah. It's way down. Yeah. Thanks.

[Dave Blunts]

How do you end up here?

[Bobby Lee]

That was good. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Tell them how you ended up here.

[Jules]

Because I don't have a visa.

[Andrew Santino]

She needs a visa.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, she needs a visa.

[Dave Blunts]

How does that like with Sony? That isn't.

[Bobby Lee]

She doesn't work for Sony.

[Andrew Santino]

She doesn't work for something.

[Dave Blunts]

Okay, okay.

[Andrew Santino]

He's around.

[Dave Blunts]

Okay, my bad.

[Andrew Santino]

But we are, we are trying to raise. It's his niece. We are trying to raise money to get her a visa. A five million dollar gold visa from Trump. We're interested to know if maybe you would want to donate some of the proceeds.

[Dave Blunts]

Nah, man, I just got money, man. I got real shit, bro.

[Andrew Santino]

All right.

[Dave Blunts]

I'm not in a donation.

[Bobby Lee]

What's your favorite drink?

[Dave Blunts]

Water, man. You see? I'm glad you guys got this for me. Water? No, this is my newfound favorite drink. Recently? No, I've been on my health journey, you know.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay.

[Dave Blunts]

Not on alcohol or lean anymore, you know what I'm saying? It's just water for now.

[Bobby Lee]

Are you smoking weed?

[Dave Blunts]

No, I quit weed when I was like 20.

[Jules]

How old are you?

[Dave Blunts]

I'm 24. I was smoking from the time I was like 9 to 29.

[Bobby Lee]

Nine years old. Wow. Give us your story about how many calories is wheat?

[Andrew Santino]

How many when you're nine? How do you smoke weed at nine, bruh?

[Dave Blunts]

I. I used to hang around older kids, so, like they were like teenagers and so. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Where'd you grow up?

[Dave Blunts]

In Iowa. Iowa. Middle of nowhere.

[Andrew Santino]

What, like Des Moines?

[Dave Blunts]

Nah, it was a town called Davenport.

[Andrew Santino]

Davenport, Iowa.

[Bobby Lee]

Wow.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And you're kicking it with. You're kicking it with a bunch of troublemaking nine year olds that and. And somehow someone has an older brother that wants to smoke weed and you're nine?

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah. Ragtag misfit group of kids.

[Andrew Santino]

You talk to any of these guys anymore now that you've made it? Now that you're on.

[Dave Blunts]

No, no, no, not that I, you know, like, changed up on him. We just grew apart over the years. Before now.

[Andrew Santino]

Before now?

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

So what, is your circle very small now?

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah, it was pretty big at one point, but, you know, A bunch of shit happened. People change up. Yeah. Now, it's pretty small now. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You want to. Do you care to share what. What. What happened in your. What happened in your circle that. Did people steal from you?

[Dave Blunts]

Nobody was stealing from me. Just using me. Pretty much using me.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, man.

[Andrew Santino]

I have a show that I do called Bad Friends, where my partner uses me very much.

[Dave Blunts]

You use him?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, he does.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm a user.

[Dave Blunts]

How.

[Andrew Santino]

He's a user, baby.

[Dave Blunts]

In what ways do you use him?

[Bobby Lee]

Well, he does all the business.

[Andrew Santino]

That's right.

[Bobby Lee]

And I just show up.

[Andrew Santino]

That's right.

[Dave Blunts]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Would you fire me if that was the case?

[Dave Blunts]

Well, that's your. Is he good at what he does?

[Andrew Santino]

Very.

[Dave Blunts]

And you're good at what you do?

[Andrew Santino]

Not really the best.

[Dave Blunts]

Okay, well, then, shit, man. It's a give and take.

[Andrew Santino]

It is 100%.

[Bobby Lee]

I love you, dude. You're a positive guy, dude.

[Dave Blunts]

Is there anything that I cannot say? You can say whatever you guys want to make sure.

[Bobby Lee]

Should I have a gun load?

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah. Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

He wants.

[Dave Blunts]

He doesn't have a gun in the building. Make sure there's no. All right, cool.

[Andrew Santino]

No, but it is funny because I've.

[Dave Blunts]

Seen a clip with him with a gun before. I just want to make sure that there's no.

[Andrew Santino]

You can say anything you want. Now go. You.

[Dave Blunts]

But he doesn't have a gun, though.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't have a gun.

[Dave Blunts]

All right.

[Andrew Santino]

He does not have a gun.

[Bobby Lee]

I have a little tiny yellow gun.

[Dave Blunts]

Oh, that's okay.

[Andrew Santino]

What do you want to say that you can't. That you think.

[Dave Blunts]

I just want to make sure. I just. Before I get to going crazy, you know what I'm saying, and go.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. I mean. I mean, you. I don't. I've seen some of your work. You don't say crazy things.

[Dave Blunts]

I. I say pretty crazy.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, he does.

[Dave Blunts]

In my music. Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Jules]

Like what?

[Dave Blunts]

Ah, man. Thank you.

[Andrew Santino]

Thanks. Rude.

[Dave Blunts]

Hard. R. N word.

[Bobby Lee]

But that's. You. What?

[Dave Blunts]

You.

[Bobby Lee]

You're black.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Dave Blunts]

But they still have a problem with. On Twitter.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, they do. Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

I have a problem on Twitter. That's Elon. Huh? Elon doesn't like it.

[Dave Blunts]

I don't like Twitter, man. Twitter is just like. Like Twitter, man.

[Andrew Santino]

Twitter.

[Dave Blunts]

I don't like Twitter.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, you can say the N word on here. Go ahead and say it a bunch if you feel like it right now.

[Dave Blunts]

Okay. Thank you. I don't really want to say nothing. I'm put on the spot.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay.

[Dave Blunts]

I appreciate that, though.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Say whatever you want, but I. I.

[Dave Blunts]

I'll, you know, if I feel like saying it at one point, then I will. But put on the spot right now, like three white guys looking at me. I'm cool right now.

[Andrew Santino]

Also, it's definitely not three white guys. That's a, A Mexican guy on the left, a Spanish guy on the right, and a vagrant.

[Bobby Lee]

A vagrant?

[Andrew Santino]

A homeless guy.

[Dave Blunts]

What is a V. Okay, I don't.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't offend you. May I say something? It's an observation.

[Dave Blunts]

Go, go ahead and say something, man.

[Bobby Lee]

This reminds me of. Remember in the Dark Knight?

[Andrew Santino]

Dark Knight? Yeah, the movie, the Dark side.

[Bobby Lee]

That guy that was in prison, right? And he exploded. Look at the cell phone right there.

[Andrew Santino]

Where?

[Bobby Lee]

In his belly. Yeah, it was sticking out, you know.

[Andrew Santino]

I mean, that brought you back to the Dark Knight.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, that, that situation, remember?

[Dave Blunts]

Oh, he ate the stuff.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Dave Blunts]

That's stupid.

[Andrew Santino]

So dumb.

[Dave Blunts]

Boy, I sure have some observation.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, you do.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, you do.

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, it was funny. Every time he makes, he makes a shot at you, you have to take one back.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, take one back and I got another one for you.

[Dave Blunts]

I don't know, man. I, I. You're a good guy, man. You're my favorite movie ever. What is Pineapple Express?

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, wow.

[Bobby Lee]

I can't.

[Dave Blunts]

You had the scene where you were in the van.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I can't.

[Dave Blunts]

Is that Bobby Lee right there?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I can't.

[Dave Blunts]

Rewind it like three times.

[Bobby Lee]

I can't.

[Andrew Santino]

Now you feel bad?

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Right there. Right? So that's me and Ken Jeong.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

In Pineapple Express.

[Andrew Santino]

How can I ask you in that movie, would you like more? The Express or the Pineapple?

[Dave Blunts]

Probably the pineapple.

[Andrew Santino]

Pineapple for show for sure. Pineapple for sure.

[Dave Blunts]

You haven't seen the movie, have you?

[Andrew Santino]

I don't. I have no idea what it is.

[Dave Blunts]

Okay. Yeah, yeah, no, that's, it's not.

[Bobby Lee]

We had a whole storyline and they cut it. The storyline out. We really did. It's in the.

[Dave Blunts]

Isn't in like the, the dvd.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

So Dave's even seen that. That's how much he loves and respects you. And here you are.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

On him saying he eatself.

[Dave Blunts]

You know, I used to watch mad TV as a kid.

[Bobby Lee]

Wow, you did?

[Dave Blunts]

Remember? Yes.

[Bobby Lee]

I said eat. What?

[Andrew Santino]

You said he was eating a cell phone.

[Bobby Lee]

No, I just the visual remind me.

[Andrew Santino]

Of the movie Cell Phones.

[Dave Blunts]

I don't eat cell phones, man.

[Andrew Santino]

Tell them that you don't need cell phones.

[Bobby Lee]

Can I guess.

[Andrew Santino]

Go ahead. And guess.

[Bobby Lee]

Waffles.

[Andrew Santino]

You like waffles?

[Dave Blunts]

Blueberry waffles. Yeah, I'm a blue waffle.

[Bobby Lee]

Chicken. Fried chicken.

[Andrew Santino]

All right, everybody. That's right.

[Bobby Lee]

I love it, too. I had it last night.

[Andrew Santino]

What else?

[Bobby Lee]

You. You do? I like the game. I like this game. What do you. What do you think he eats?

[Andrew Santino]

Probably Chipotle.

[Dave Blunts]

Nah, I've never had Chipotle.

[Bobby Lee]

That's. You're not good at this game.

[Andrew Santino]

Never had Chipotle.

[Dave Blunts]

No.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

That is shocking to me. I've never met someone that hasn't had Chipotle in my life. Do you like tacos or.

[Dave Blunts]

No, not really. No.

[Bobby Lee]

Collard greens?

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah. See, he's pretty good at this game.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Dave Blunts]

Or not.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay, what else? Go ahead, Bob. Take it away.

[Bobby Lee]

Why are you cooking Memphis barbecue?

[Dave Blunts]

Why is he covering his face?

[Andrew Santino]

Because. Because we'll put another image.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, what if a different image? Because I feel like what I'm saying is bad.

[Dave Blunts]

Okay. Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. What would I eat? Go ahead. This is your shot.

[Dave Blunts]

Rice.

[Bobby Lee]

It hurts, but I love it. Now. Now we're on the same playing field.

[Dave Blunts]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

What else? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Come on. Come on. Get it. Get deep. That's right.

[Dave Blunts]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. What else, baby? Come on.

[Dave Blunts]

I don't want to say the obvious ones. Say it like hats and all types. You know what I'm saying?

[Bobby Lee]

You should commit to that, though.

[Andrew Santino]

Say it. Yeah, yeah, David.

[Dave Blunts]

All right. It. Feline cats.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hell, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

At night. He turns into one at midnight.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I do that. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

This is funny if you say up in your. On your. Like, in your raps and on YouTube, but you're a very reserved, calm, sweet guy in life. You don't have that.

[Dave Blunts]

I. I only use it when I need to. You know, I don't really feel like. I don't. Bobby Lee is a threat.

[Andrew Santino]

No. Right.

[Dave Blunts]

You know what I'm saying? I don't feel offended by anything he's saying.

[Bobby Lee]

You like me?

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah. I'm a fan.

[Bobby Lee]

I love you right now, dude.

[Dave Blunts]

I'm. I'm a fan for. I'm fanned out right now.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, wow. Wow. That's great. Yeah. So what kind of size mattress.

[Dave Blunts]

What. What type of size mattress are you sleeping on, Bobby? I feel like you sleep on a.

[Bobby Lee]

Twin crip for Bobby. Yeah. Yeah. You know, honestly, that was rude. Honestly, I want to be honest with you.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, we're not gonna cut it out.

[Bobby Lee]

Why?

[Andrew Santino]

Because you asked a real question.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. And what I want to say to you is this.

[Dave Blunts]

You know, sleep on a Twin mattress.

[Bobby Lee]

That's very good. See what I mean? He's opening up.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, it's actually like on a.

[Dave Blunts]

Like, I feel like you have like a. Like a car bed or some. He has like a very, like. Like, kiddish type bed.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, there we go. You know, you come in here and I'm being a child, and I'm like. I'm gonna just state the obvious.

[Andrew Santino]

You have child.

[Bobby Lee]

Like, he is a talented young man.

[Dave Blunts]

Yes, sir.

[Bobby Lee]

He's extremely lik. You want a sitcom?

[Dave Blunts]

Me too.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, you want to act?

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah, at some point.

[Andrew Santino]

Let's do a scene. All right, let's.

[Bobby Lee]

The title of sitcom. Way different strokes.

[Dave Blunts]

Way different strokes. Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

Or it might have a stroke.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, you might have a stroke.

[Dave Blunts]

Wait, why does he have a. Okay, go ahead, go ahead.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

But let's have your character name for the show. That's Sheila. Yeah, yeah, that's Marmaduke.

[Dave Blunts]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

I. Marma Duke. That's Marmaduke.

[Dave Blunts]

Hello. Hello. And what racist name are you guys gonna give me? Jerome.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm Uncle Bub. Okay, you can name yourself and you name yourself Jerome. Okay, that's good.

[Dave Blunts]

I'll take it, man.

[Andrew Santino]

All right, I'm Uncle Bub, That's Marmaduke, and that's Sheila. All right, Jerome. Hey, you want to have breakfast? You want to sit down and have breakfast with us?

[Dave Blunts]

Well, I don't know if I really want to have breakfast today.

[Bobby Lee]

I've already.

[Andrew Santino]

Let me stop you right there. Yeah, I can't.

[Dave Blunts]

I got a name like Jerome. I have to be.

[Bobby Lee]

I love like it. That's a great choice.

[Andrew Santino]

It's a little too Steve Harvey for me. No, no, stop.

[Bobby Lee]

No, stop. Stop the process, Jerome. What you have for breakfast?

[Dave Blunts]

Well, shit, I already had me some grits before I came downstairs, so I. I don't really know if I'm too hungry today.

[Bobby Lee]

I made you some breakfast.

[Dave Blunts]

Wow, thank you. I appreciate that very much, but like I said before, I already had me some.

[Bobby Lee]

It's grape flavored Ozempic.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, my God. Hey, Uncle Bub. Here, kids, get your stuff. We can finally get out of. Get out of these housing projects. We gotta go.

[Dave Blunts]

Oh, no. This communist bastard just offered me some.

[Bobby Lee]

Don't call me communist, Uncle Jerome. I'm from Cleveland.

[Andrew Santino]

I think it's. I think it's.

[Bobby Lee]

What's Sally?

[Andrew Santino]

That's Sheila.

[Bobby Lee]

Sheila.

[Jules]

You don't see nothing, Jerome. Do you want blueberry waffles?

[Andrew Santino]

Very good, very good, very good, Sheila.

[Jules]

I can't finish mine.

[Andrew Santino]

How many did you make, sheila?

[Jules]

I made 10.

[Andrew Santino]

You made 10 waffles. How many did you eat?

[Jules]

One.

[Andrew Santino]

All right, nine for you.

[Dave Blunts]

What?

[Andrew Santino]

So do you want to make 30 more? All right, Marmaduke, I'm in a mood. You are in a real mood.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm sorry there, Jerome.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, listen, I want you kids to work this out when I go to work, okay? Bye, dad. Dad. Say bye to dad.

[Dave Blunts]

All right, Pops, I'll see you later.

[Andrew Santino]

All right, Pops. I love you the most, Jamal. You know that.

[Dave Blunts]

Thank you, but my name's Jerome.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, in this house, you're Jamal.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You've got your own house. You can call yourself whatever you want.

[Bobby Lee]

Leave.

[Andrew Santino]

I love you.

[Bobby Lee]

We're gonna get ready for school.

[Andrew Santino]

Bye, Dad. I love you, You.

[Dave Blunts]

And then when he leaves, I change to my real voice.

[Andrew Santino]

There it is.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah, I'm not going for none of that no more.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, well, I'm tired of using your fat as a blanket.

[Dave Blunts]

And I'm tired of you peeing in Mason jars and hiding it in your bedroom. It stinks up there.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, you know what, Jerome? I love you.

[Dave Blunts]

You.

[Bobby Lee]

And then the credits go down.

[Andrew Santino]

Credit.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Wow. TV continues.

[Andrew Santino]

Call abc.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, there's a show somewhere.

[Andrew Santino]

We can get that. Sony. Call your friends at Sony.

[Bobby Lee]

There's a show somewhere there.

[Andrew Santino]

Dave, what's the deal? Are you on tour?

[Dave Blunts]

I'm getting ready to go on tour.

[Andrew Santino]

You are?

[Dave Blunts]

Yes. And I'm going. I'm going to. It's gonna be the best tour ever.

[Andrew Santino]

Who opens for you on tour?

[Dave Blunts]

We're still setting all that up, but, yeah, I'm going on tour. April 12th.

[Andrew Santino]

It begins April 12th.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Inglewood. You start here in Inglewood, California?

[Dave Blunts]

No, no, I started in Phoenix, I believe.

[Andrew Santino]

Phoenix. There we go. Dallas.

[Bobby Lee]

Wow. So could we come to it? Would we get comped or backstage, all that stuff?

[Dave Blunts]

Hell, yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Dave Blunts]

Hell, yeah. You want to come to the Santa Ana show?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Santa Ana. We should do that in May.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, Santa Ana show. Dude.

[Dave Blunts]

Hell, yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

That'd be fun.

[Andrew Santino]

It's a consolation room. Are you selling good tickets right now, huh? You're killing it.

[Dave Blunts]

That shit's selling pretty good. Yeah, they're. They're coming because they want to see the crowd surf.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, they want us. They want to see you crowd surfing.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah. I announced that I'm going to be crowd surfing at one city on the tour. I don't know what city it is. It's just gonna speak to me in the moment.

[Andrew Santino]

I gotta be honest.

[Dave Blunts]

Oh, no. Why is he laughing? I'm not too sure what I said. That's funny.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, no, I was just.

[Dave Blunts]

What's funny?

[Bobby Lee]

No.

[Dave Blunts]

Well, boy, I sure have some bad friends.

[Bobby Lee]

Very good, very good.

[Dave Blunts]

That's the name of the show.

[Bobby Lee]

I love you dude.

[Dave Blunts]

Signs right there.

[Andrew Santino]

I do think, I do think I am curious of how the mechanics are going to work.

[Dave Blunts]

Of what?

[Andrew Santino]

On, on you crowd. On you surfing in a crowd.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah, man. I mean, shit, my fans are going to hold me up as I dive into the crowd.

[Andrew Santino]

And you're gonna jump from the stage.

[Bobby Lee]

Two of your friends, Triple H, the Rock bodybuilders.

[Dave Blunts]

Yes. I mean, I mean I hope that the Rock is a fan of me there. Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Arnold Schwarzenegger. I mean, who's there, dude? I mean.

[Andrew Santino]

Dave, let me listen my fans.

[Bobby Lee]

Imagine like a 12 year old skinny kid.

[Andrew Santino]

What the.

[Dave Blunts]

Listen, it's kind of like when, you know a mom can move a car, you know?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Dave Blunts]

Listen, my fans, I don't have ass fans, bro.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay.

[Dave Blunts]

My fans are like really strong minded and so I feel like that'll just transfer over.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay.

[Dave Blunts]

So the physical strength.

[Andrew Santino]

Tell me this, you. Have you ever crowd surf before?

[Dave Blunts]

No, no. Hell no.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay. But you, you are gonna do it one of these shows.

[Bobby Lee]

Andrew.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah. What is he. Okay, what is he saying?

[Andrew Santino]

He's asking me to talk you out of doing.

[Bobby Lee]

I didn't say that I'd say that. What the. That's crazy.

[Andrew Santino]

He said talk him out of it.

[Dave Blunts]

Nah, nah, there's no talking me out.

[Andrew Santino]

He's saying please, dead serious, please talk him out of it. Someone's gonna die is what he said. They can hear you on the mic now, Dave, you're gonna pick a show to do this you're gonna crouch if you're gonna jump from the stage.

[Dave Blunts]

Yes. Yes, sir.

[Andrew Santino]

Wow. That brave man. I mean I. I don't want to crouch. I'm afraid I break a neck. You don't want him to do.

[Dave Blunts]

What is he, what is he like? Why is he talking to you and, and not.

[Bobby Lee]

Because I'll tell you why.

[Dave Blunts]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Can I tell you why?

[Dave Blunts]

Go ahead, go ahead.

[Bobby Lee]

My bud.

[Andrew Santino]

My bud.

[Bobby Lee]

I feel like I'm being the mean one.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

And he's playing the nice guy.

[Andrew Santino]

It's good cop, bad cop.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. And I feel like the things I'm saying, I'm gonna get lynch for not lynched.

[Dave Blunts]

Lynched. Wow. Okay. Crucified two days after Black History Month.

[Bobby Lee]

Crucified. Crucified for. Okay, honestly, I swear to God that.

[Andrew Santino]

Wasn'T an interesting choice of words.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. I swear to God that wasn't a thing. I swear to God. I swear To God.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, I get it.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah. I'm gonna be crucified for. And you're gonna be the saint.

[Andrew Santino]

Here's what it is.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You feel like society is going to move you to the back of the bus.

[Dave Blunts]

That. That better. Better than Lynch. That's better than Lynch.

[Bobby Lee]

That's what I feel like.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah, yeah, that was a good one. But it's.

[Andrew Santino]

You feel like the whole country's gonna see this and they're gonna sick dogs on you? Is that what you're.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

[Andrew Santino]

You feel like people are gonna watch this show.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And go. Andrew seems to be getting along with Dave. Yeah, Bobby, we should hit with a. With a fire hose.

[Bobby Lee]

Yes.

[Dave Blunts]

These are all. These are all things that have happened to black people.

[Andrew Santino]

What?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, that's me. That. You know what?

[Dave Blunts]

That's funny. It's funny, bro. I'm not a soft ass.

[Bobby Lee]

I know you're not. And I'll tell you something, right? This is serious business. We're talking about serious business.

[Dave Blunts]

Okay? Let's get to the serious business.

[Bobby Lee]

And what I'm saying to you is, is that. You mean the civil rights movement, you know, it was.

[Dave Blunts]

What about it? What do you just said? The civil rights. What about it?

[Bobby Lee]

What I'm saying is, is that you. I mean, we fought hard, you know, who is you? You.

[Dave Blunts]

Who is we? What were you doing during this time?

[Andrew Santino]

He was. He was actually a yellow Panther. He was around back then.

[Dave Blunts]

Yellow panther.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay, well, I did my own speech. Okay, you want to hear it?

[Dave Blunts]

Hate speech.

[Bobby Lee]

No. You want to hear my. You want to hear my speech?

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah, go ahead.

[Bobby Lee]

I had a. Dreaming that white people would do their own laundry. I had my own speech that night.

[Dave Blunts]

Okay. That night. What night?

[Bobby Lee]

When, when.

[Dave Blunts]

What specific night?

[Bobby Lee]

You know, I mean, when the civil.

[Dave Blunts]

Rights movement was not just one night.

[Andrew Santino]

The dark night.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Dave Blunts]

I feel like he thinks it was one singular night.

[Andrew Santino]

It was the dark night.

[Dave Blunts]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, yeah. Yeah. So I. When Martin Luther had this great speech, I did my own speech.

[Dave Blunts]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Not at a Chinese restaurant.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

It was four people there. But you know, it was. It moved those four. Yeah, yeah, it really did.

[Dave Blunts]

Okay. Hell yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm telling you, he's. But we're. But we're. We're bonding worlds here.

[Bobby Lee]

We're bonding. We're like. Do you prefer like, let's. Let's see you and I win a war.

[Dave Blunts]

Excellent. Okay. I'll go ahead.

[Bobby Lee]

See you and I win a war.

[Dave Blunts]

Okay. We're in a war.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm Fine.

[Dave Blunts]

Wait, before I keep. Can I just say something because you mentioned war.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Dave Blunts]

Did you know that now they're not gonna allow transgender people in the military? That's pretty crazy.

[Bobby Lee]

That's crazy. How do you feel about it?

[Andrew Santino]

How do you feel?

[Dave Blunts]

Well, I don't really. I'll go to war with any of these people.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Dave Blunts]

That's a pretty good. You guys like, like that one?

[Bobby Lee]

That's a really good one.

[Andrew Santino]

Really good use of the word.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, it's a really good.

[Dave Blunts]

I've been.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, I got that lineup I've been.

[Dave Blunts]

Working on, that ass pen. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I've wanted to use those three words so bad in conjunction.

[Dave Blunts]

It's pretty good, man. I. I like saying those words, man.

[Bobby Lee]

I just got. I just got it. Andrew, Say it. And I want you to say it right. A sequel to a movie and tell.

[Andrew Santino]

Me the movie that he needs to be in. Yeah, a sequel to a movie that he needs to be in. Fences.

[Bobby Lee]

Wow.

[Andrew Santino]

That's Fences.

[Bobby Lee]

Wow. Yeah. You be that. Win an Oscar? What? Did anyone win an Oscar for that movie? Yes. Driving Miss Daisy.

[Dave Blunts]

Come on, man. Boy, I sure have some bad friends.

[Andrew Santino]

There we go.

[Bobby Lee]

I have a little dick.

[Dave Blunts]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

All right. Look at me, little guy. Yeah, I'll be a guy. Whatever you mean, I have a little dick. I have malfunctions in my body, right?

[Dave Blunts]

Malfunction.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. And I've had people tease me my whole life.

[Dave Blunts]

Why are you talking about your body like it's a machine?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's. I've had. I've been bullied.

[Dave Blunts]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Right.

[Dave Blunts]

I've seen.

[Bobby Lee]

And I'm. We have the same cause.

[Dave Blunts]

Same cause?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Dave Blunts]

I mean, same.

[Bobby Lee]

Cause we're in the same group.

[Dave Blunts]

I. I don't think I want to be in that.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, but you are.

[Dave Blunts]

I don't think I'm in that group.

[Bobby Lee]

You remember I'm in a group. You remember in the. In casting directors, you'd be like, we're looking for white, Hispanic, and other.

[Andrew Santino]

Right. You're other.

[Bobby Lee]

We're other.

[Dave Blunts]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

He's saying bonding. You as minorities.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, we're other. I feel it, man.

[Dave Blunts]

Minorities.

[Bobby Lee]

And you. You knew. You, you, you, you. You are success, and you're killing it.

[Dave Blunts]

Thank you.

[Bobby Lee]

What a resilient young man.

[Dave Blunts]

Thank you. You know, of all. Against all odds. I'm doing it.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, dude.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah. Resilient oxygen tank on stage.

[Andrew Santino]

You. Yeah. You don't have one. You don't have one now.

[Dave Blunts]

No, I'm doing pretty good right now, man. I'm on my health Journey. You know, I've put down the cup and I've picked up the water.

[Andrew Santino]

So. No more. No more promethazine.

[Dave Blunts]

I'm not gonna say no more. There's a picture.

[Bobby Lee]

Wait, hold on.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

You literally have an oxygen.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Dave Blunts]

That was front of 20, 000 people.

[Bobby Lee]

My God.

[Dave Blunts]

More than that.

[Bobby Lee]

Amazing.

[Dave Blunts]

But yeah. At the United Center.

[Bobby Lee]

Now, let's be real for a second.

[Andrew Santino]

It's my hometown. Yep.

[Dave Blunts]

Chirac. Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Can we help you?

[Dave Blunts]

I don't think I need help with anything.

[Bobby Lee]

I'll be real now, you know, because. Yeah, I'll be real with you. And this is. And I.

[Dave Blunts]

This is gonna say so.

[Andrew Santino]

Boy.

[Bobby Lee]

No, I'm not gonna say any. I'm not gonna say any because, you know, I was dear friends with Ralphie.

[Andrew Santino]

Yes.

[Bobby Lee]

And I never said it.

[Dave Blunts]

Rest in peace.

[Bobby Lee]

I never said anything.

[Andrew Santino]

Right.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. And I. I've always regretted that I didn't. It's like, you know, when people have a drug addiction at the store. Right. I always go up to. If you ever want to go to a meeting, I'll take you. And I always do.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, for your reference, I don't know if, you know, Bobby isn't recovering alcohol.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah, I know that for sure.

[Bobby Lee]

So what I'm saying is, is that I'm. Jokes aside.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Is there anything we can do? Because it's like, at the end of the day, we want you to get healthy here.

[Dave Blunts]

And I'm. And I'm working on that, you know.

[Bobby Lee]

But what are you doing?

[Dave Blunts]

What am I doing? I'm exercising, eating correctly.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay, good.

[Dave Blunts]

Drinking a lot of water. You know, I recently got out of the hospital and that was like a wake up call for me of sorts. What happened?

[Andrew Santino]

Made you go to the hospital?

[Dave Blunts]

A bunch of bullshit. But, yeah, I'm doing good now.

[Andrew Santino]

You're fine.

[Bobby Lee]

You're fine.

[Andrew Santino]

Did you have a serious incident that made you go to the hospital? That.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah, yeah, but I'm chilling now, you know, I'm making the changes, you know.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, what he's saying is we want Dave Blunts around.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I think.

[Dave Blunts]

I appreciate that.

[Andrew Santino]

I think you're very talented and very.

[Dave Blunts]

I think what you can do for me is, you know, just emotional support.

[Andrew Santino]

There you go.

[Dave Blunts]

Saying, you know, a couple atta boys. Claps.

[Andrew Santino]

Attaboys.

[Bobby Lee]

Attaboy.

[Dave Blunts]

And yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

So are you. Are your parents still together?

[Dave Blunts]

My mom. Well, my dad passed away when I was young, but my mom. My mom, she's my everything. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

His dad died too.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. I'm so sorry.

[Dave Blunts]

Just in peace.

[Andrew Santino]

Another thing you have in common.

[Bobby Lee]

Another. We have so much in common. We.

[Dave Blunts]

We might be like. Did we just become bad friends?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah, we did. Yeah. I want to do a movie called War Babies with you.

[Dave Blunts]

War Babies? Yeah. I'll go to war. Any of these?

[Bobby Lee]

No, no. Our father was, you know, black.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

And he did a couple of wars in different places. And then we're offspring of that Black man.

[Dave Blunts]

I'd watch that movie. I feel like we could sell that.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't know if you could.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Dave Blunts]

Not like Netflix.

[Andrew Santino]

We could.

[Dave Blunts]

We could probably do a 2B release.

[Andrew Santino]

I would love to see it.

[Dave Blunts]

I think we can do a 2B release. You know, flex. Free movies.

[Andrew Santino]

I feel like it might end up on YouTube. This could be a YouTube film.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

War Babies.

[Bobby Lee]

So you. You live in LA? Where do you live?

[Dave Blunts]

I live in LA now. I recently moved here. Well, back in June, I moved here.

[Bobby Lee]

You like it?

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah, I. I didn't like it at first. Then I went back home to visit. I'm like, I get the out of here and get back to la.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Dave Blunts]

So now I love it. This is my new home now.

[Bobby Lee]

Good.

[Andrew Santino]

Dude, you're going to be touring from here? It's hard to tour from la. There's two guys that tour from la. It's tough. Tough, I will say.

[Dave Blunts]

What do you mean it's hard?

[Andrew Santino]

Well, I mean, you're flying across the country and you're.

[Dave Blunts]

Oh, no, I don't fly all that. I'm going on a tour bus.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, okay.

[Bobby Lee]

So when's the last time you've flown?

[Dave Blunts]

When I came here. When I came here. When I did. When I did. To the Chicago, like the United Center. We drove there, bro. That was 30 hours. That was the worst mistake of my life.

[Andrew Santino]

That's a far drive.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah, bro.

[Bobby Lee]

I was on a. I'm not trying to be funny.

[Dave Blunts]

Hold on. Just. Can I finish? So, yeah, man. We drove there and it was in a sprinter van. Why does he look like. He can't, like. Are you good? Why did you, like, get away from the mic and, like, turn?

[Bobby Lee]

I'm really listening.

[Dave Blunts]

Okay, but no, you're not. Like, you was turned away.

[Bobby Lee]

I have slender ears, too.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

All right. I have to lean it this way. God, you're being racist.

[Dave Blunts]

Oh, my bad. All right. I like that jacket, by the way, but no, man. Yeah, it was in a sprinter van and that sucked. It was 30 hours non stop driving. We didn't stop at all. And the seat belt buckle was poking me in my ass. At least I hope it was a seat belt buckle.

[Andrew Santino]

Right. And never know sprinter vans, but now you're gonna be on a tour bus.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah, we did.

[Andrew Santino]

We did the tour bus, him and.

[Bobby Lee]

I. Yeah, we did, but. And don't. Don't. You can't poo.

[Dave Blunts]

I. I still have heard. You can't on the.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, you can catch it.

[Dave Blunts]

I've seen that in the show.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, you physically can't. It's also an uncomfortable. It's. The bathroom is small. The toilet's against the door. You can't do it. Yeah, you cannot do it.

[Dave Blunts]

Mine's got a pretty big bathroom in it, though.

[Andrew Santino]

Really?

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay. Because ours didn't definitely not have a big bathroom. We had to put in the shower because we ran out of storage space. But go ahead and ask the question.

[Bobby Lee]

I. I don't want to.

[Andrew Santino]

Go ahead.

[Bobby Lee]

I can't. I can't.

[Andrew Santino]

Why?

[Bobby Lee]

The time passed and it's like. It's rude and I don't like it.

[Andrew Santino]

What was it?

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah, I like it. Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

I can't. It's. It's gonna. It's. It. The timing, you know, in comedy there's timing.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah. Comedic time.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. It had to be there. I don't have the confidence to say it.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm gonna guess.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

As a comedian.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay, good.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm gonna guess that's something to do with the flight.

[Dave Blunts]

Oh, yeah, we can talk about that. Yeah, let's talk about.

[Bobby Lee]

Wasn't gonna be funny, but I was just curious about. When people see you get on the book, they get scared.

[Jules]

I mean, imagine my uncle in Germany who's bigger than. You have to buy the whole aisle.

[Dave Blunts]

The whole aisle? Like the aisle that people walk down?

[Bobby Lee]

No, the row.

[Jules]

The whole room.

[Bobby Lee]

The row. Right.

[Dave Blunts]

Not two seats, though. Two seats. Not the row. Okay, not the row.

[Bobby Lee]

Good.

[Dave Blunts]

Not the row.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. And they don't get scared, so that's good. I answered my own.

[Jules]

Yeah, I love you Have a girlfriend.

[Dave Blunts]

We recently just broke up.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, no, you're free.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah, you're free.

[Bobby Lee]

You broke up with her, right?

[Dave Blunts]

How did that happen? Yes.

[Bobby Lee]

You like the white?

[Dave Blunts]

Kinda. It was like a mutual thing.

[Bobby Lee]

You like the white stuff?

[Andrew Santino]

What flavor? Yeah, what flavor do you like, man?

[Dave Blunts]

Come on, bro.

[Andrew Santino]

What flavor you like, man?

[Bobby Lee]

Right now?

[Andrew Santino]

French vanilla, I bet.

[Dave Blunts]

Okay. It's not even necessarily white. That's just my track record. Ah, it's white. I'm attracted to all of them, you know, but.

[Bobby Lee]

But not.

[Dave Blunts]

I shoot for black, but I land at white.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Dave Blunts]

You know what I'm saying?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. You're an la.

[Dave Blunts]

Now, guy, I don't really like LA women, man. I usually go outside of LA for the woman.

[Andrew Santino]

Like Chatsworth.

[Dave Blunts]

Chatsworth? What's that?

[Andrew Santino]

What do we. You mean surrounding Los Angeles? You mean out of California as a whole?

[Dave Blunts]

No, I usually be, like, flying out type.

[Andrew Santino]

You be flying?

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, that's the best way, dog.

[Dave Blunts]

Yes, sir.

[Bobby Lee]

Congratulations, player.

[Andrew Santino]

We gotta fly these watches out.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. You're gonna fly them out?

[Andrew Santino]

Are you putting them up first class?

[Dave Blunts]

Nah.

[Andrew Santino]

No.

[Bobby Lee]

Coach. Right.

[Andrew Santino]

Coach, baby.

[Bobby Lee]

Spirit flight middle. See a spirit middle.

[Andrew Santino]

And then what if. And what if they. Because he likes to. He. He often not. Sorry. Sometimes Bobby has friends that fly out.

[Dave Blunts]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

But. But I'm curious to know, do they stay in a hotel or they stay at your house?

[Dave Blunts]

They stay with me, man.

[Andrew Santino]

What if they say, I. I want a hotel, Would you get them a hotel?

[Dave Blunts]

Those ones? I usually just be like, I don't think it's gonna work out.

[Andrew Santino]

It's not gonna work out.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

You know what? You know the signs.

[Andrew Santino]

He knows this.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

You know when they're using you and.

[Dave Blunts]

No. No, I don't now. I. No, I don't.

[Bobby Lee]

What do you mean?

[Dave Blunts]

I don't know when they're using me.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, you don't know.

[Dave Blunts]

It's hard for me to tell.

[Bobby Lee]

Sometimes they do.

[Dave Blunts]

Sometimes they do. Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

So you've flown most of the time.

[Dave Blunts]

They do some.

[Bobby Lee]

You've flown somebody out.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

You realize that they were using you.

[Dave Blunts]

Yes.

[Bobby Lee]

And that hurts.

[Andrew Santino]

That hurts.

[Dave Blunts]

It hurt because she's living with me. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, yeah.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah, I know. I know. Oh, man.

[Bobby Lee]

But that's happened. Has it not happened? To me, it has.

[Dave Blunts]

Damn.

[Andrew Santino]

He's gone through that. And so do they ask for money and.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And they say, will you buy me?

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah. But these ones, man, these are like, real trench. Do you know what a trench bench is?

[Bobby Lee]

I can guess.

[Andrew Santino]

Google trench.

[Dave Blunts]

I don't think you'll be able to find it. Yeah. Something from, like, World War II pop up.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Dave Blunts]

That's a song. Who sings that?

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, black.

[Dave Blunts]

Black youngster.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, Black youngster.

[Bobby Lee]

Let's see photos of some trench.

[Andrew Santino]

Let me read the lyrics.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

This is.

[Dave Blunts]

I didn't know this was a song.

[Andrew Santino]

I put my life on the line I'mma break up with you.

[Bobby Lee]

Don't do it white. Do it like. Like they do it should sing it together.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. I put my life on the line I'mma break up with you Hoe it's over. You've been disrespectful. I hope crazy house come get you. Hope Hoe. Pistol by the dresser. Cause I'm sleeping by my pistol hoe. I don't tongue wrestle when you speaking on my hoe. I can't put. I can't put my before my bro. Cause my bro. That's my bro. But my bro, he gotta know then he can't disrespect my hoe. She ain't just no. Wait. She ain't just no. Any hoe. She's some, like, my mind hoe. Even though she my side, I buy her a range row verb.

[Bobby Lee]

That's really good.

[Dave Blunts]

That was good. That was good.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, that was really good.

[Dave Blunts]

Okay, you did the rover thing, and.

[Andrew Santino]

He did even do that. I wrote that for you, black youngster. So reach out.

[Bobby Lee]

Can I see a photo of a trench house?

[Andrew Santino]

Wait, hold on, hold on. The next lyric literally says trench.

[Bobby Lee]

Trench.

[Andrew Santino]

She don't give a. About rich. I keep my. Oh, so you like a trench. This. This means she is.

[Dave Blunts]

She's from the trenches.

[Andrew Santino]

From the streets.

[Dave Blunts]

The trenches.

[Andrew Santino]

Right.

[Dave Blunts]

The trenches. Yeah. She's not used to, like, luxury lifestyle.

[Andrew Santino]

Our generation calls them real ones.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, the real ones. Yeah. We. Anyway.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, listen up, Dave Blanche.

[Bobby Lee]

We are. You're. We gotta. You gotta come back here.

[Andrew Santino]

You gotta come. Yeah, we love you. Do you have any burning questions to ask us before we wrap up the show? Anything that you wanted to say?

[Dave Blunts]

Well, I do want to ask, man. You know, when we get in a new season, Dave.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, never. It's over.

[Dave Blunts]

It's over. It's like, seriously, it's over. Yeah, yeah, like, bro, no. Like, come on.

[Andrew Santino]

No, it's done. That was one of the things. That's one of the requirements when. When Hamas returned the Israeli house.

[Dave Blunts]

All right, all right, all right, all.

[Bobby Lee]

Right, all right, all right. What? That's a true story.

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, when. When Hamas returned the hostages, they said, but no more days.

[Bobby Lee]

No more days.

[Andrew Santino]

And that was part of the deal.

[Dave Blunts]

Is it seriously done my night? No, no, it is. That's my favorite.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm sorry.

[Bobby Lee]

It's done.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, yeah.

[Dave Blunts]

Damn it. Kind of left on like a cliffhanger almost.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, well, blame Hamas, Blaine.

[Andrew Santino]

Hamas. Oh, that's. Who did it.

[Dave Blunts]

How come you didn't give Bobby a role in the show?

[Bobby Lee]

That's a really interesting. That's a really interesting question that I really never had the answer to.

[Andrew Santino]

I mean, I can give you the answer.

[Dave Blunts]

Good.

[Andrew Santino]

We really only worked with people that really kind of were, you know, what, a little, like, legit actors filled with really good actors.

[Dave Blunts]

Gator wasn't even. He had no roles before that.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, no, that's right. I was being facetious. No. You know, I had no control over the show. I wish I could have got Bob on the show, but he.

[Bobby Lee]

Dave doesn't like me.

[Andrew Santino]

Dave doesn't like you? That's right.

[Bobby Lee]

Seriously, just move on.

[Andrew Santino]

No, dude, no. Hollywood doesn't really work that way.

[Bobby Lee]

It doesn't work that way.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, I wish it did, but if it was my show, clearly we're making our own shows together. But when you're on somebody else's show.

[Dave Blunts]

You guys are having a show together.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, we have a. We have a Hulu animated show.

[Andrew Santino]

We do. And we have a game, and we.

[Bobby Lee]

Would love to have you in it.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Hey.

[Dave Blunts]

Hell yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Dave Blunts]

Let me know. I'm down.

[Andrew Santino]

You'll play Jerome?

[Dave Blunts]

Hell yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

We'll make him like a pixie or something.

[Dave Blunts]

What's the. Okay. What is the animated show about? If you guys want.

[Andrew Santino]

I can't. We can't leak it.

[Dave Blunts]

Okay, okay, okay.

[Bobby Lee]

I swear to God, we. We're going to use you.

[Andrew Santino]

Dave's on tour. Go to. What is it? Daveblunts.com.

[Dave Blunts]

Bastard took.

[Andrew Santino]

Com. We got to get that.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, we got to get them.

[Dave Blunts]

Yeah, we gotta get Dave Blunts co.

[Andrew Santino]

Go to Dave Blunts co. He's going to be down there in the Crescent ballroom. Oh, Phoenix, love dude. House of house of Blues. Cambridge. He's going to Texas. There a bunch of Texas states. Atlanta and New York. The market hotel in New York. Well, Dave, do me a big favor. We appreciate you being on the show. We end the show by you saying something that you really feel deep in your heart to Rudy Jewels. If it's a truth, you need to tell her or something very powerful. Give her a powerful message to her. She's young. Yeah. She needs kind of a little bit of advice.

[Dave Blunts]

How old is she?

[Bobby Lee]

She's.

[Andrew Santino]

What are you, 6?

[Jules]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

No, she's 20. What, 2?

[Jules]

23.

[Andrew Santino]

23.

[Dave Blunts]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

Give her some life advice that you've learned.

[Dave Blunts]

Life advice? You know, shit. You know, you're in your 20s. This is the time to fuck up and make all the mistakes. Do drugs, be in a relationship that's bad for you. You know what I'm saying? This is the time to do it now.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Dave Blunts]

So when you're 30, like, you've been through shit. You're like, all right. Nah. Now it's time for me to, you know, be a good person, citizen.

[Andrew Santino]

Level out.

[Dave Blunts]

So, yeah. Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

I want you to look in that camera right there and say thank you for being a bad friend.

[Dave Blunts]

Thank you for being a bad.