New Episode Today On Patreon

Summary

Bad Friends – "New Episode Today On Patreon"

Hosts: Bobby Lee & Andrew Santino
Release Date: March 13, 2026

---

Episode Overview

This episode captures the chaotic and affectionate banter fans love from Bobby Lee and Andrew Santino, joined by supporting voices “C” and “D” (likely Rudy and/or a close recurring guest), riffing on stolen clothes, boundaries of personal space, family dynamics, and Bobby’s notorious laziness. Wearing each other's clothes, manual versus luxury toilets, and household complaints all become fodder for comic confessions and gentle jabs, giving listeners another peek at the group’s peculiar yet heartfelt camaraderie.

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Great Sweatshirt Mystery and Laundry Shenanigans

• Clothes Borrowing or Clothes Theft?
  • The episode opens with an interrogation about a Barstool Sports shirt and transitions into a revelation that various personal items—including Bobby’s Talking Heads shirt—regularly swap owners, often without consent.
  • Bobby laments: "Also, can I just say something? Right now? You're wearing my Talking Heads shirt." (01:00)
  • The banter revolves around who does laundry (the mom, apparently), how clothes end up lost or traded, and a debate over whether these items were gifted, borrowed, or downright stolen.

2. Bathroom Habits & Toilet Tech Talk

• Japanese vs. Manual Toilets:
  • Conversation derails into the intimate topic of bathroom preferences and the luxuries of Japanese toilets.
  • Bobby brags about his Toto: "Yeah, I do." (01:58), and insists the bidet spray is sacred: "That spray is mine. You're not allowed. No, no, no. We're not sharing that spray." (02:03)
  • The group jokes about the “Erewhon water” he allegedly uses for the bidet: "I use Erewhon water for that spray. And there's limited amount on there." (02:17)
  • C contrasts with their own setup: "I still have old school manual toilet. I have the top tank. I have to pull down." (02:25)
  • Bobby adds: "I also have a hole in the wall... in the ground." (02:31-02:35)

3. Personal Space, Family, and Boundaries

• Room Entry Rules:
  • There’s a recurring bit about keeping people out of Bobby’s room: "You're so scared of us going inside." (01:36)
  • Bobby accuses others of misusing his bathroom: "You pooed in my bathroom. I can tell." (01:43)
  • D jokingly denies all charges, while the amusement escalates around house rules and familial boundaries.

4. Self-Deprecation, Workloads, and the Bad Friends Dynamic

• Who Does the Real Work?
  • The group plays up Bobby’s lazy reputation as the real backbone of the show is (jokingly) revealed:
    • Bobby: "Andrew does 95% of all work." Andrew: "97." Bobby: "Alright. 100%. No, I do 3%." (03:05-03:17)
    • Ultimately, Bobby baldly apologizes: "I'm lazy. I have no idea what is going on. And if you got me involved, I would it up." (03:25-03:32)

5. Signature Bad Friends Affection & Ribbing

• Admitting Flaws, But Owning the Chaos:
  • The duo affirms that their back-and-forth, with honest admissions of laziness and family weirdness, is what works—"It's me, baby." (03:39)

---

Notable Quotes & Moments

• On Stolen Clothes:

  • Bobby: “You can wear it. But anyway, who does your laundry? Their mom.” (01:12)
  • D: “No, you put, like, a lot of shirts in a plastic bag and you said, you can have this.” (01:21)
  • Bobby: “There is no way that...Because you stole that out of my closet, baby.” (01:26–01:30)

• On Toilet Tech:

  • Bobby: “That spray is mine. You’re not allowed. No, no, no. We’re not sharing that spray.” (02:03)
  • Bobby: “I use Erewhon water for that spray. And there’s limited amount on there.” (02:17)
  • C: “I still have old school manual toilet. I have the top tank. I have to pull down.” (02:25)

• On Work Division:

  • Bobby: “Andrew does 95% of all work.” (03:05)
  • Andrew: “97.” (03:12)
  • Bobby: “I have no idea what is going on. And if you... got me involved, I would it up.” (03:25-03:32)

• Embodying Their Relationship:

  • C: “I’m allowed to go, ‘it’s annoying that you XYZ’ and you’re allowed to go, ‘but it’s me, baby.’” (03:35–03:39)
  • Bobby: “Yeah.” (03:39)

---

Timestamps for Important Segments

• 00:37–01:30 — Clothes swapping accusations and family laundry politics
• 01:43–02:17 — Bathroom banter, luxury toilets, and bidet boundaries
• 02:25–02:35 — The contrast between fancy and old-school toilets
• 03:05–03:32 — Admission of laziness and work division on the podcast
• 03:35–03:39 — Comic acceptance of each other’s quirks as the heart of the show

---

Summary in Tone

Staying true to Bad Friends, this episode is packed with playful roasting, unexpected tangents (from “stolen” streetwear to bidet ownership), and plenty of endearing self-mockery. The chemistry between the hosts and their familiar circle shines through, making even the pettiest house squabbles and confessions into comedy gold.

If you’re missing the affectionate chaos of classic Bad Friends, this episode is a perfect microcosm of the show—equal parts ridiculous, relatable, and riotously funny.

Transcript

[A]

This episode is brought to you by State Farm. Listening to this podcast. Smart move. Being financially savvy. Smart move. Another smart move. Having State Farm help you create a competitive price when you choose to bundle home and auto bundling. Just another way to save with a personal price plan. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. Prices are based on rating plans that vary by state. Coverage options are selected by the customer. Availability, amount of discounts, and savings and eligibility vary by state.

[B]

Oh,

[C]

Are you wearing a barstool sports shirt?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

What. What is going on?

[B]

What is going on with you? Did you order that online?

[D]

No, it's the first sweater that I saw. Island Girls. It's the island girl.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[D]

Island girls. It's the island girl.

[B]

He was in my house.

[D]

Yeah, it was in her closet.

[B]

Is that my sweatshirt?

[D]

I think so.

[B]

Yeah. Also, can I just say something? Right now? You're wearing my Talking Heads shirt.

[D]

What is that, the cat one?

[B]

No, the Talking Heads. It's a Talking Heads on. It's a band. You never heard of the Talking Heads?

[C]

No.

[B]

Okay, but the other day, you were wearing it.

[D]

Well, I didn't notice.

[B]

Oh, you can wear it. But anyway, who does your laundry? Their mom.

[C]

Well, then.

[B]

Oh, that's true. That's true. Yeah.

[D]

No, you put, like, a lot of shirts in a plastic bag and you said, you can have this.

[B]

It. There's no. There is no way that.

[D]

Why would I be wearing it?

[B]

Because you stole that out of my closet, baby.

[D]

Why would I steal it? I don't even know the van. We don't even go in your room.

[B]

Yeah, you don't go in my room ever.

[D]

No, because you cover it up. You're so scared of us going inside.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You poo pee. No.

[A]

No.

[B]

You pee downstairs. What? You pooed in my bathroom. I can tell.

[D]

Well, you're.

[B]

Yeah, it's like Coke. There's like a coconut oil on the seat.

[C]

You slip right off.

[B]

I slip right off of it.

[C]

Why do you have a. Do you have a Japanese toilet?

[B]

Ye.

[C]

You have a Toto.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah, I do.

[C]

So then you like to use that.

[D]

It greets you when you go in.

[C]

Welcome.

[B]

Do you spray your butt with the water? That spray is mine. You're not allowed. No, no, no. We're not sharing that spray. All right.

[D]

Touching your butt.

[B]

That's. That spray is on reserve. It's not unlimited water. I put an extra. A special.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

O2. You know what I mean? Erewhon water. I use Erewhon water for that spray. And there's limited amount on there.

[C]

That's crazy. I still have old school manual toilet. I have the top tank. I have to pull down.

[B]

Oh, you do.

[C]

And that gravity's got to take it.

[B]

So I have two styles. You have that, and I also have a hole in the wall.

[A]

In the ground.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

Which you're used to. You're back, baby.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

How long were you gone for?

[D]

Like, I'm not sure.

[C]

You don't even know?

[D]

I don't even know.

[B]

Yeah. You know, the other day you said something and really this is the first time where I was like, maybe my behavior is wrong. Hmm. So your mom.

[C]

Something more often, by the way, if that's.

[B]

Yeah. So you're. What? What was that about?

[C]

You said.

[B]

You said you're doing all the work.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Okay.

[D]

Okay.

[B]

All right. You know, I want to apologize to everybody right now, right? Please, everyone on the show. Andrew does 95% of all work.

[C]

97.

[B]

Whatever. 100. I'll give you 100%. No, I do 3%.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, yeah. All right. You guys do all the work. All right. And I apologize right now out front.

[A]

All right.

[B]

I'm lazy.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I have no idea what is going on.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Right. And if you. I would it up if you got me involved.

[C]

I agree.

[B]

You're right. So that's why I'm not involved.

[C]

I'm allowed to go. It's annoying that you XYZ and you're allowed to go, but it's me, baby.

[B]

Yeah.