Stavros, the Off White & the Golden Lee

Summary

Podcast Summary: Bad Friends – Episode "Stavros, the Off White & the Golden Lee"

Hosts: Bobby Lee & Andrew Santino
Guests: Stavros Halkias
Release Date: January 6, 2025
Production: A 7EQUIS Production

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1. Favorite Indiana Jones Movies

The episode kicks off with a spirited discussion about the Indiana Jones film series, showcasing the hosts' deep appreciation for the franchise.

• Bobby Lee expresses a strong preference for the third installment, Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, highlighting Sean Connery's performance:

  "The third one's the best one. Yeah. Yeah. With Sean Connery. Which one's that called? The Last Crusade." [01:36]

• Stavros Halkias concurs, emphasizing the charm of the third movie:

  "The Last Crusade. You know, River Phoenix. It's fun." [14:54]

• Andrew Santino mentions his nostalgia for the animated show and the upcoming video game adaptation:

  "I haven't watched any of those in so long. I think Bethesda is developing a new Indiana Jones game." [01:48]

2. Breakfast Burritos Banter

The hosts transition into a light-hearted segment about their favorite breakfast burritos, engaging in playful teasing and personal preferences.

• Andrew Santino inquires about Bobby's ideal burrito ingredients, leading to a humorous exchange:

  "What's your perfect bb? Colfax Ingredients, I mean, but Kofax is phenomenal." [02:27]

• Bobby Lee shares his love for pico de gallo and eggs, adding his twist with crispy bacon:

  "Pica de gallo, dude. You know, eggs. Eggs. Bacon." [02:34]

• Stavros Halkias jokingly critiques the preparation methods, sparking laughter:

  "Why don't they refry it three times?" [02:50]

3. Fictional Criminal Case Discussion

The conversation takes a creative turn as the hosts discuss a fictional criminal case involving a character named Luigi, the CEO of a health insurance company.

• Andrew Santino introduces the scenario, prompting serious yet comedic debate on its legal implications:

  "What do you think is going to happen to this guy?" [04:09]

• Bobby Lee humorously speculates about the jury's empathy leading to an acquittal, despite the gravity of the crime:

  "Because there's gonna have empathy for him." [04:16]

• The hosts explore the societal influences and public perception, maintaining a balance between humor and satire:

  "The good looks help." [05:22]

4. Brainstorming "Let's Start a Cult" Movie Idea

A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to brainstorming a comedic movie titled "Let's Start a Cult." The collaborative effort showcases their creativity and camaraderie.

• Bobby Lee initiates the brainstorming session, proposing a plot where adopted brothers seek their mythical fathers:

  "We're brothers. We're all serious or adopted." [20:03]

• Stavros Halkias adds fantastical elements like Bigfoot and vampires, infusing humor into the concept:

  "Or a vampire. Or you could be a vampire." [22:07]

• Andrew Santino emphasizes the importance of a strong character dynamic, suggesting roles for each host:

  "You and I would be a team. You're getting crazy, goblin. And I'm focused on the mission." [69:42]

• The trio further refines the plot, incorporating mythical creatures and comedic twists, such as characters with unconventional traits:

  "He's got like stitches on his... you know, him and Sean Connery." [26:26]

5. Jokes on Casting and Character Traits

Throughout the brainstorming session, the hosts engage in humorous exchanges about potential casting choices and character developments.

• Bobby Lee humorously suggests unconventional roles, like playing a newscaster, while Stavros teases his friend's acting prowess:

  "You might not need to come to a newscaster, Bobby." [51:12]

• They joke about blending various mythical elements, resulting in a unique and comedic narrative style:

  "You're Little Foot, and I'll be a dwarf. That’s good." [28:28]

6. Upcoming Projects and Future Aspirations

As the episode concludes, the hosts express their enthusiasm for future projects, inspired by their collaborative creativity.

• Stavros Halkias shares his success with the short movie "Let's Start a Cult," praising the production team's support:

  "We got Dark Sky Films and Queensberry Pictures interested." [47:19]

• Bobby Lee and Andrew Santino express their eagerness to create more comedy movies, emphasizing the importance of producing content for their dedicated fanbase:

  "It's just nobody's making. I think we're gonna do it." [48:43]
  "We are gonna make more movies with my friends and just... stuff for the fans." [47:35]

7. Memorable Quotes

Throughout the episode, several quotes stand out for their humor and insight:

• Andrew Santino on balancing personal projects:

  "Between us developing the animated show and the game show, where do you find the time to do all this stuff?" [02:03]

• Bobby Lee on creative collaboration:

  "We just have to write it. And when I say we have to write, it means we can't watch all three. Indiana Jones. Yeah, we have to write the movie." [19:53]

• Stavros Halkias on embracing creativity:

  "I really want to make more movies with my friends and just... to make stuff for the fans." [47:46]

8. Conclusion

The episode wraps up with the hosts reiterating their excitement for their current projects and future endeavors, leaving listeners enthusiastic about what's to come.

• Andrew Santino encourages listeners to watch their movie:

  "And so you just inspired me. I think we're gonna do it." [48:43]

• Stavros Halkias promotes their short movie and upcoming tour:

  "Buy it. Rent it on Amazon, Apple, wherever you buy movies now." [47:14]

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Final Thoughts: This episode of Bad Friends offers a blend of humor, creative brainstorming, and insightful discussions on pop culture. The dynamic interplay between Bobby Lee, Andrew Santino, and Stavros Halkias highlights their chemistry and shared passion for comedy and storytelling. Listeners are treated to a fun-filled exploration of movie ideas, personal anecdotes, and the hosts' aspirations to create more engaging content for their audience.

Transcript

[Bobby Lee]

This episode of Bad Friends is presented and fueled by Huel, Your go to.

[Andrew Santino]

For complete nutrition, try HUEL with 15% off today using code BAD FRIENDS at my.huel.com BAD FRIENDS. Hey, BAD Friends. I'm finishing up my tour in 2025. Happy 2025 to you. Let's finish it beautifully before I shoot my special Chicago. This week. I'm in my hometown of the Chicago theater. I think it's sold out. Maybe some standby tickets. Come see me. Then I go to Durham, North Carolina. Come on, Durham. Show up. Show out for your boy. Atlanta, Georgia. Charleston, South Carolina. Then Philly. I'm playing the Met. I cannot wait. Philly, I love you so much, you dirty birds. New York. I'm at the Beacon. Then I go to Phoenix, San Francisco, two shows, San Diego, two shows, Boston, four shows. Four shows in Boston. Come out and see your boy. And then three shows as of now, in Minneapolis. Maybe we added a fourth. We don't know. Who knows? Come out and see me. Minneapolis. I love you guys. Andrew Santino dot com. You go to Andrew Santino dot com.

[Bobby Lee]

You two are bad friends. Who are these two idiots?

[Stavros Halkias]

White dude, Asian dude.

[Bobby Lee]

You two are disgusting. You two are something. We're bad friends. You know, I've been. I've been watching all the Indiana Jones and I know which one I like. You know which one? Which one do you like?

[Andrew Santino]

I know which one you like.

[Bobby Lee]

No.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yes.

[Bobby Lee]

It has nothing to do with Short Round. No. I think the third one's the best one.

[Andrew Santino]

It is the best one.

[Bobby Lee]

The third one. Yeah. Yeah. With Sean Connery. Which one's that called?

[Stavros Halkias]

The Last Crusade.

[Bobby Lee]

The Last Crusade. The Last Crusade. You know, Lost Ark is okay. I think it's great. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

The last arc is amazing. The first one I haven't watched.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

I haven't watched any of those in so long.

[Bobby Lee]

I know, because the reason why I'm rewatching it is because I'm playing the video game. Oh, on Xbox. Yeah. Bethesda has, you know, I mean, a new Indiana Jones game.

[Andrew Santino]

Where do you find the time?

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, the time is my own. In my hands. The time's in my own. In my hands.

[Andrew Santino]

Between us developing the animated show and the game show, where do you find the time to do all this stuff?

[Bobby Lee]

Well, it goes. This show. Pussy. And then Indiana Jones, baby.

[Andrew Santino]

I get it.

[Bobby Lee]

What's up, dude? You know what I mean? That's the order, dog. And then fourth is breakfast burritos. I love breakfast burritos.

[Andrew Santino]

What's your perfect bb? Colfax Ingredients, I mean, but Kofax is phenomenal.

[Bobby Lee]

What do you mean?

[Andrew Santino]

What's your favorite ingredients of a breakfast?

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, pica de gallo, dude. You know, eggs. Eggs.

[Andrew Santino]

You want to scramble or fry?

[Bobby Lee]

Bacon.

[Andrew Santino]

Bacon. You want crispy or whiskey?

[Bobby Lee]

I love when they put the frijoles in the fridge.

[Andrew Santino]

You want frijoles here? Going to put him in.

[Bobby Lee]

Why don't they refry it three times?

[Andrew Santino]

We.

[Bobby Lee]

That's what I always wonder.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, you know, we only have a double fryer.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay, so. And then lion, my son. My son. The CEO from the health insurance. My boy, my boy. God, what a guy, huh?

[Andrew Santino]

Ouiji Manioni.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

What a name, man.

[Bobby Lee]

Boycott McDonald's.

[Andrew Santino]

Wow.

[Bobby Lee]

Her name is Nancy Parker.

[Andrew Santino]

Look at his chest.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Look at this guy. Dude, dude. I would harbor him. Wouldn't you harbor him? Oh, yeah, yeah. He's running from the wall. Come to my house.

[Andrew Santino]

Come on in.

[Bobby Lee]

I. I'm not gay, but come on, dude.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm making him a couple of breakfast burritos.

[Bobby Lee]

Dude, he's like Bruce Banner. Not Bruce Banner. He's like Bruce Wayne.

[Andrew Santino]

Hi, Luigi. You slept in last night. What have you been doing this morning? Running from the law when I been going. What have you been doing?

[Bobby Lee]

I was just in New York watching a show.

[Andrew Santino]

What were you doing in New York? You're on Broadway.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Watch Wicked.

[Andrew Santino]

Wick. Did you hold space? You were holding space?

[Bobby Lee]

What do you. You think he's going to go to prison?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, pretty sure. I think if you kill someone.

[Bobby Lee]

No, you shoot someone in the back, I'm going to tell you what's going to happen.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, okay. Give it to me. You're the da.

[Bobby Lee]

No, no, I'm at the da. I'm Bobby Lee.

[Andrew Santino]

What's going to happen? What's going to happen to this guy?

[Bobby Lee]

I think a jury is going to acquit him.

[Andrew Santino]

How? And why?

[Bobby Lee]

Because there's gonna have. They're gonna have empathy for him.

[Andrew Santino]

Brother, he shot him in the back.

[Bobby Lee]

I know, but his mother.

[Andrew Santino]

What about his mother?

[Bobby Lee]

We know what. You know what I. You know what else I'll do? He has the same thing.

[Andrew Santino]

You have back problems. I saw.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. That's what he.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't see me out there shooting anybody.

[Bobby Lee]

I know, but maybe it's not bad.

[Andrew Santino]

Enough yet, but somebody, if they keep it up.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

They might get shot.

[Bobby Lee]

You start talking about me. No, you'll never shoot me. I'll shoot you first. I know.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, buddy, no.

[Bobby Lee]

Let's just touch dicks.

[Andrew Santino]

He's not going to get acquitted. He's Going to prison for a long, long time.

[Bobby Lee]

But if you read the comments online, though, people are behind him.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, because he's good looking.

[Bobby Lee]

No, it's what he did.

[Andrew Santino]

It's because he's good looking. Oh.

[Bobby Lee]

So if I did it, dude, no trial. No trial.

[Andrew Santino]

Life in prison.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Me, I'd get like 20 years. Yeah, you get life. I get 20.

[Bobby Lee]

No, they would have shot me at the McDonald's. Can I have a number? And I'd be dead, Right?

[Andrew Santino]

Put the Big Mac down.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I'd be dead. But no, he. The good looks helps.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm on Ozempic.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, but the good. The good looks helps.

[Andrew Santino]

It doesn't help. It's the only thing. It's the thing. Look at. They posted this photo of him in People magazine.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Being glorified.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. He is hunky though, huh?

[Andrew Santino]

They're glorifying.

[Bobby Lee]

Let's be honest.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, he's a really good looking kid.

[Bobby Lee]

He's the opposite of Stavros. Yeah, yeah, yeah, he's the opposite of Stavros.

[Andrew Santino]

They have the same sex appeal for two different reasons. That's what it is. But this guy's going to prison for la la la la life.

[Bobby Lee]

You know what's so funny about that? Stavros and Stavros and Ian finance these whites. I know he's Greek, but these whites are my type. But they still get more girls than me.

[Andrew Santino]

That's not true. You get plenty of women.

[Bobby Lee]

I think they get more.

[Andrew Santino]

How, dude? How full do you want it to your cuppeth? I mean, come on. They're white.

[Bobby Lee]

That was the point I was trying to make. But the way you said it really hurt.

[Andrew Santino]

They do get whites. Yeah, they get whites.

[Bobby Lee]

They're white.

[Andrew Santino]

You get off white.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I get brown. What is he here?

[Andrew Santino]

He probably.

[Bobby Lee]

Don't tell him I said that.

[Andrew Santino]

You manifested him. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You say his name once?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

But seriously, you do know he's gonna get. He's gonna get life in prison. He can't get off. There's no way they'll let him off. I mean, it was too egregious the crime.

[Bobby Lee]

What if Trump pardons him?

[Andrew Santino]

Won't. Why would he?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, you're right.

[Andrew Santino]

There'd be no connection to be made.

[Bobby Lee]

But I haven't read like one negative comment about him.

[Andrew Santino]

That's because people. Look, that's because this society is fed up with. Society's fed up with the way that things are going in the healthcare industry.

[Bobby Lee]

Yep.

[Andrew Santino]

Doesn't mean you should kill a guy, though.

[Bobby Lee]

I think you're right.

[Andrew Santino]

I think it doesn't mean you'd shoot him.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, because he had kids.

[Andrew Santino]

Even if he didn't. You don't kill the guy. You don't kill somebody.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Can't go out and kill. That's not how we fix everything. Luigi, the hero of 2024, says, that.

[Bobby Lee]

Guy read all of them.

[Andrew Santino]

Insanity plea. Oh, they're trying to give him an insanity plea.

[Bobby Lee]

Read all of them. Dude. They love them.

[Andrew Santino]

Tmz. Free Luigi mugs and cups on sale. Use code. Bad friends at Free Luigi. Despite who the man worked for. That's not okay. I don't like that they keep doing this. I don't like this. He. He was someone's son and a dad. He's just a guy. What do you mean? It doesn't matter if he's a father, if he's single, if he's married. He's a guy. You can't just kill a guy in cold blood. Like, you can't. You can't.

[Bobby Lee]

You can.

[Andrew Santino]

He did it well, but he's going to suffer the consequences.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You're going to go to prison for life.

[Bobby Lee]

Holy smoke. Dr. Jones.

[Andrew Santino]

By the way, you know how much happier.

[Bobby Lee]

Let's go around. I. We saw Temple of Doom yesterday.

[Andrew Santino]

How much happier would.

[Bobby Lee]

Indie. Indie that. Holy smoke. I love it.

[Andrew Santino]

I know you do, buddy. How happy would society be if he just punched him? Then you would get nothing. Just knock him out. Then if you're so angry, would have made the same news. You wouldn't be on the run.

[Bobby Lee]

You also imagine all the people that have died because of. What was it? United Health Insurance?

[Andrew Santino]

I know, buddy, but it's not him directly.

[Bobby Lee]

I know, but he's. He is a symbol of it. And it's like he has some power.

[Andrew Santino]

Sure, but you can't advocate.

[Bobby Lee]

Does he not have any power?

[Andrew Santino]

You can't advocate for murdering him because of it. Yeah, it doesn't. Just doesn't make sense. Yeah, you can't. You just. I mean, I'm sorry. You just cannot. No, not sorry.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm. For the people, though.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Yeah. You're from the streets. That's how they handle things in Poway.

[Bobby Lee]

Bobby is pro assassination. No, not pro assassination. I feel empathy for his family. You know what I mean?

[Andrew Santino]

But also for Luigi.

[Bobby Lee]

No, no. For Brian Thompson. Is that his name?

[Andrew Santino]

I have no idea.

[Bobby Lee]

Brian Thompson's family.

[Andrew Santino]

Funny, we know the killer, not the killed.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

That's a symptom of America. Look at this here.

[Bobby Lee]

There he is. There he is. What's up, buddy.

[Andrew Santino]

Love. And give me a calendar.

[Stavros Halkias]

Is that for mama's debris?

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, you got to get these calendars, guys.

[Andrew Santino]

These calendars are incredible. We hang them up in the front room of our studio.

[Bobby Lee]

Wow.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't want. Don't give any away. I don't want to see anybody to see any photos.

[Bobby Lee]

Wow. Whoa.

[Andrew Santino]

Stavi, baby, you got some, too.

[Stavros Halkias]

Don't you worry.

[Andrew Santino]

The baklava is for.

[Bobby Lee]

For. Is this Rosie O'Donnell? How'd you get her? I don't know how you got her, but that's great.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm good. Thanks.

[Andrew Santino]

Wow. So let me say something. You're not on Ozempic, right?

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm not.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Just making sure.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm in the control group.

[Bobby Lee]

Have you ever thought about getting on it? Because I'm on it.

[Stavros Halkias]

Are you?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

How's it feeling?

[Bobby Lee]

I'm losing some weight. I feel it.

[Andrew Santino]

Stand up and show him your stomach. It's unbelievable. The guy lost. He's losing his butt, which is cute, dude.

[Stavros Halkias]

I mean, you always look cute.

[Bobby Lee]

Thank you. Dude.

[Stavros Halkias]

He's losing.

[Andrew Santino]

His BBL is going away. That's what we're concerned about.

[Stavros Halkias]

Were you ever a butt guy, though?

[Andrew Santino]

He had a nice tush. Yeah. Had a nice.

[Bobby Lee]

I really did have a Brazilian in type.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Really? Yeah, you were shapely. See, I can't afford to lose any ass. I. I have a flatter ass than I'd like. I want to get in the gym. I want to get.

[Bobby Lee]

You have an Asian's ass on pony.

[Stavros Halkias]

I wish I didn't, but. Yeah, I think you're right.

[Bobby Lee]

I think you do, too.

[Stavros Halkias]

And that kind of hurts me and.

[Bobby Lee]

The dick, cuz I.

[Stavros Halkias]

Well, yeah, but look at these calves. I want my ass.

[Bobby Lee]

Whoa, dude. Look at those calves, dude.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm saying.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

I feel like I'm at sea.

[Andrew Santino]

How are you? So how are you so tan?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Where you.

[Stavros Halkias]

Where you been, buddy?

[Andrew Santino]

By the way. By the way, it could either be tan with you or gout. I have no idea.

[Stavros Halkias]

It would be. It would be. I would look like Bobby if I had gout. It would be a richer yellow.

[Bobby Lee]

That's a good one.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, no. Anyway, they survived.

[Bobby Lee]

They survived. McCONE Good boy.

[Stavros Halkias]

Like the ball boy at the U.S. open.

[Andrew Santino]

Your. Your mom makes the best shit on earth.

[Stavros Halkias]

They're so good, Mama.

[Andrew Santino]

HOK is honestly baklava.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. We got baka. We got. We have a melo ma. We got it all.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

What's up, Fell? It's great to be here.

[Bobby Lee]

Good to see you. And congratulations on the Movie.

[Stavros Halkias]

Thank you.

[Andrew Santino]

Give it up for the movie.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Give him a round of applause for the movie.

[Stavros Halkias]

Thank you.

[Bobby Lee]

And everybody go watch let's Start a Cult.

[Andrew Santino]

It's available right now, everywhere, really. Right.

[Stavros Halkias]

You can rent it. You can rent it and go see me live. I'm. I'm on a tour. Not the. The. The Dreamboat tour is out. You can buy tickets to that now. So I'm out here, baby.

[Andrew Santino]

Let's go, baby.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm out here.

[Bobby Lee]

What's. What's. What's the next show?

[Stavros Halkias]

The next show. Our first show is in. It starts in February. It's in Wheatland.

[Andrew Santino]

Wheatland, California. You're doing the Casino or something. Oh, the Hard Rock. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You've done that, didn't you?

[Stavros Halkias]

San Francisco, going all the way through the west, down the West Coast.

[Andrew Santino]

So watch out, ladies. It might be.

[Stavros Halkias]

I am looking to.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, you are.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

So what's your favorite Indiana Jones movie?

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, my God, the first one.

[Andrew Santino]

Everyone's is the first one. Why do you keep asking that?

[Stavros Halkias]

Like, wait, wait, you're. You're going to do the one where he's got an Asian sidekick?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Holy smoke. That.

[Stavros Halkias]

That one's fun.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, it's a fun one.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's fun, but it's. The first one is the best.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. Can I tell you about the. Because I've been. I rewatched all of them yesterday.

[Stavros Halkias]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, in a row. Had a. I found the time.

[Stavros Halkias]

It sounds like. How many emails. How many emails did you ignore from the people?

[Bobby Lee]

I don't. I don't read. Let me say something about. I'm mad at two. I'm mad at the Temple of Dune. I'll tell you why.

[Stavros Halkias]

Why?

[Bobby Lee]

Sorry, I have baklava. Because when I was a kid, I saw that movie. Okay. And then they're at. They're in some Indian palace.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

The food comes out, and in my mind, I think that that's Indian food.

[Andrew Santino]

Right.

[Bobby Lee]

Right. They bring out a gigantic bow constrictor, and then they open it and there's 50,000 other snakes in it.

[Andrew Santino]

Now, they still do have that dish.

[Bobby Lee]

There's another one where it a. A tray full of beetles.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. The beetle.

[Bobby Lee]

And they eat the underbelly of the beetle.

[Stavros Halkias]

I don't remember this.

[Bobby Lee]

And then monkey brains.

[Andrew Santino]

Monkey brains. My favorite part.

[Bobby Lee]

And I remember as a kid, I'm like, oh, I. I don't like Indian food.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't want to eat Dr. Jones.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't like monkey brain. Yeah, yeah, I forgot. I've read them.

[Stavros Halkias]

Monkey brains. I don't remember how.

[Andrew Santino]

Zoom into that photo. No, go back to the.

[Bobby Lee]

That's the monkey plant.

[Andrew Santino]

Zoom in the original photo you were just at. Not that one. Go back to the first one. Now zoom in. You see that guy right there?

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

That's a white guy that they just got all dressed.

[Bobby Lee]

All right, right, right.

[Andrew Santino]

So funny.

[Bobby Lee]

And that's Steven Spielberg's wife.

[Andrew Santino]

That is.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, it is his wife.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

You think that's how she got it?

[Andrew Santino]

I think she auditioned. She went through the process. Oh, yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

It was an offer.

[Andrew Santino]

I bet she read three or four times they got married after.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, really?

[Andrew Santino]

I remember that guy eating the monkey pants right there. That.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Eric Griffin made it into the film somehow.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. There he is.

[Andrew Santino]

Wow.

[Bobby Lee]

Eric's in it. Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

How clearly is that Jello? Go back. Look, they didn't even try. Sometimes you see special effects and stuff like that in the movies today. Like, it looks too cheap. Go back to the original.

[Stavros Halkias]

I like it, though.

[Andrew Santino]

Look, that's jello. That's just Jello.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

They could have tried a little bit.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's nice and red. I like it because it's. Because the thing is, it's in the uncanny. Like, they want it to be physical. It's clearly not an actual monkey brain. They respect you enough to do that. But they'll be like, it's a rendering of a monkey brain. Especially. These are. These are like homages to old adventure movies when they didn't have that stuff. And you could be very racist. Like, it almost feels like they had to be extra racist to be like. Go ahead. Go ahead, Robert.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I. I don't want to school you guys.

[Andrew Santino]

School me?

[Bobby Lee]

Kiddo, Can I school you for a second, please? That's frozen monkey, Brian. Oh, that's why it's that color, dude.

[Andrew Santino]

Sorry about that, dude.

[Stavros Halkias]

Things get brighter when they're.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't know, dude. I don't know, dude.

[Andrew Santino]

You're moving speed of light right now. You need to slow down.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't know how it work.

[Andrew Santino]

Way too fast.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm just going to correct you guys. It's not just regular monkey brain. It's been frozen.

[Stavros Halkias]

That was two. And the.

[Bobby Lee]

The third one is when the Last Crusade. Oh.

[Stavros Halkias]

With Sean Connor.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

That one's pretty.

[Bobby Lee]

I think that's the best one. That's the best one.

[Andrew Santino]

It's not the best one. Number one is the best one.

[Stavros Halkias]

Number one's the best one. But they're. They both. Both two and three have their fun little charms, though. Totally Sean Connery. And then the beginning part with River Phoenix. River Phoenix.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's fun.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

But in the temple, my dog, he.

[Bobby Lee]

Also runs into Hitler. Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Runs into Hitler.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Sean. Him and Sean Connery. The same Nazi. Which is funny.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, that's good. Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Do you remember Eskimo brothers with the same Nazi.

[Bobby Lee]

You good?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Which is a fun. Yeah, that's a fun plot point in a wholesome.

[Andrew Santino]

She was so hot, by the way.

[Stavros Halkias]

Was a nice.

[Andrew Santino]

The Nazi was hot.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, she was hot. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Such a hot Nazi, dude.

[Bobby Lee]

And she had to read a bunch of times. She had to read a bunch of times.

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, she got the role offered for sure.

[Bobby Lee]

No, I saw the documentary. Really. But she got the role.

[Andrew Santino]

She got the role offered. Oh, they asked.

[Stavros Halkias]

This is like, let's lose every young person tuning in.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Talking about By.

[Andrew Santino]

By.

[Stavros Halkias]

In detail. Discussing Indiana Jones.

[Andrew Santino]

You know, she kind of looks right. Like right there. She kind of looks like Einhorn as Finkle. Finkel is Einhorn.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, yeah, she does.

[Andrew Santino]

Who is that actress that played in Ace Ventura? Who played that?

[Bobby Lee]

Sean Young.

[Andrew Santino]

What was her.

[Stavros Halkias]

Sean Young.

[Bobby Lee]

John Young.

[Andrew Santino]

That was her name.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yes, yes.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. She kind of has that same.

[Stavros Halkias]

You're right. The bone structure.

[Andrew Santino]

Yes. Because honestly, this was so ahead of its time. An androgynous. Well, she played a girl so well that could have been a guy that we didn't even question it when they said it was a guy.

[Stavros Halkias]

I. I have a different read on.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay, go.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, give me a read. Savros.

[Stavros Halkias]

I think. Well, first of all, I'll say I was so fucking dumb as a kid.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

That I was like. I didn't realize because the whole idea was they put her dick in her ass.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Or she was tucking her. Yeah. So as a kid, I thought she shit herself. I thought that was the big reveal, is that she had shit. And. And they're like, ah, she's gross now. She's a dirty. She's a dirty whore that shits herself.

[Bobby Lee]

Wow.

[Stavros Halkias]

But I also will say, I think it's a complete. Like, I don't think she played it as a dude. I think she was just a hot, aggressive woman.

[Andrew Santino]

She had masculine qualities that they did tip off in the movie a few times. And by the way, I know why you thought that was poop and not a penis. Because Mama Halkias was just feeding you that baklava, being like, don't worry, baby. Don't worry.

[Stavros Halkias]

You're probably right.

[Bobby Lee]

That's a poop.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's with my dad and he didn't want to explain.

[Andrew Santino]

Totally.

[Stavros Halkias]

He didn't want to explain. He's like, she shit herself.

[Andrew Santino]

Right? You didn't have a jilted childhood where my dad was like, that's a dick. That's a fucking dick.

[Stavros Halkias]

But I think the, the, the fact they played her masculine, actually, because if a trans girl looked that good, she wouldn't be masculine. They do, but what I'm saying is they don't know. Be more feminine.

[Andrew Santino]

Dude, get on the Internet. It's insane.

[Stavros Halkias]

No, no, they do, they do, but I'm just saying what I'm saying. Their mannerisms are not aggressive. They like to be girly.

[Bobby Lee]

Do you masturbate? Do you masturbate to trans? I've have.

[Andrew Santino]

You look so concerned.

[Bobby Lee]

No, I just want. I'm just wondering.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm taking it for a spin a couple of times where you're not, you're.

[Andrew Santino]

Not a fan of the party. You don't want to show up, you.

[Bobby Lee]

Know, because of Jim.

[Andrew Santino]

Because of Jim Norton?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. I.

[Andrew Santino]

To his wife.

[Bobby Lee]

No, no, no. I went camping with him.

[Stavros Halkias]

Right, right.

[Bobby Lee]

So, you know, when you're in a tent with Jim Norton, things are gonna be said, right. About, you know, a variety of topics.

[Andrew Santino]

Got it.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. And he told me who, you know, who's, you know, the ones to watch out there. Oh, yeah. So then I, you know, I like to pour different things and I watched and I. Okay, yeah. And I felt bad about it, but I feel bad.

[Stavros Halkias]

You can tell Bobby's uncomfortable because he's just doing that voice for no reason.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's the thing himself. From the fact that he jacked off the transport.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

He's doing it in a goofy voice.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So you have then. Yeah, me too.

[Stavros Halkias]

Sure.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Good. How about you give him a whirl?

[Andrew Santino]

I've been free. I've been.

[Bobby Lee]

What does that mean?

[Andrew Santino]

I've seen it all.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

There's nothing I haven't seen on the Internet. I feel like I've literally seen everything.

[Bobby Lee]

I've seen it all too. But have you played with your penis by watching it?

[Andrew Santino]

No, dude. I'm usually on there for research, just to intake information. I'm really looking at from a cinematic point of view.

[Stavros Halkias]

Right.

[Andrew Santino]

By the way, I will, I will say there are some new age shit that's out there. The cinematography is incredible.

[Stavros Halkias]

Not bad.

[Andrew Santino]

Some of these are so high end. They're doing such a good job now. It's like full production. Storylines are great and they're twisty.

[Stavros Halkias]

There's like lens flares.

[Andrew Santino]

It's really?

[Bobby Lee]

Really. Like, J.J. abrams is drinking it. Yeah, yeah. He loves those lens flares.

[Andrew Santino]

You know what I rewatched on the plane, I rewatched X, Maxine the First. You know the X one?

[Stavros Halkias]

I haven't seen it.

[Andrew Santino]

Dude, it's fantastic. It's so fun. It's fun. It's fun because it's. There's nothing else like that out there. You don't see anything like that anymore. It's like a sexy horror. Like a really bad one of the.

[Bobby Lee]

Of the three.

[Andrew Santino]

But it's campy.

[Stavros Halkias]

First one.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, X. Yeah, but it's super campy, which is like, it. It tips it.

[Bobby Lee]

It.

[Andrew Santino]

Dude, it's telling you. It knows it's corny.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

So it's fun.

[Bobby Lee]

I would love to do.

[Andrew Santino]

And she's a horror movie beautiful with you guys. I would love to do a camping comedy.

[Bobby Lee]

A comedy camping horror movie.

[Andrew Santino]

No, can't be.

[Bobby Lee]

Can't be.

[Stavros Halkias]

He wants to get back in that tent. Talk about trans. No, I love whatever gets us in the table, Jim. Yeah, yeah, we'll do a comedy.

[Bobby Lee]

But why can't we make one?

[Andrew Santino]

We can.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Right now, dude.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, we can make one.

[Andrew Santino]

Let me tell you something.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

We have to write it. And when I say we have to write, it means we can't watch all three. Indiana Jones. Yeah, we have to write the movie.

[Bobby Lee]

I can write it right now.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay, do it. Go Think.

[Stavros Halkias]

What do you think it is?

[Bobby Lee]

We're brothers.

[Stavros Halkias]

We're all serious or adopted.

[Andrew Santino]

Adopted brothers.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, we're all adopted brothers, clearly.

[Andrew Santino]

And we had to lead that horse to water. You see, it wasn't going to go there.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm the one that. Brothers said the brothers thing.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, you stop the brothers.

[Bobby Lee]

I know. Yeah. And so then, you know, back in the 70s. Right.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, how about this? Same mom, different dads. I'm into that. That's fine. Our mom. Our mom was just a party animal that was like sleeping with all sorts of guys. Yeah, that's fine.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, maybe, like I was told, I wasn't adopted, but you guys know that I was, so that's a theme.

[Andrew Santino]

We couldn't be brothers either. Him and I look literally fucking nothing alike.

[Bobby Lee]

Exactly.

[Stavros Halkias]

Different dads. We could.

[Bobby Lee]

No, I don't think so.

[Andrew Santino]

My dog.

[Stavros Halkias]

We definitely could not.

[Andrew Santino]

Stop. Stop.

[Stavros Halkias]

We definitely do.

[Andrew Santino]

We have literally zero Jean crossover.

[Stavros Halkias]

I don't know. Look, I think if you start at a base white woman.

[Bobby Lee]

So your dad was like, yeah, and.

[Stavros Halkias]

She fucks with the most G ginger of all time. We could get you.

[Bobby Lee]

And then she John. John Goodman in the 80s.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

To get him. Right. And the Pat Marina. Pat Marina.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Okay, here we go.

[Stavros Halkias]

The camp. We go back to the camp where she conceived us. Lamb piece, everybody. Our mom. And we go looking for our dad.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. There's a tree too, with all the names that your mom f. Right, that's. That's engraved in the tree.

[Stavros Halkias]

We have to hunt them all.

[Bobby Lee]

It's a lot of names.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Ye. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's like 38 guys for one summer.

[Andrew Santino]

Think about. Think about this for. For a movie, for movie wise, dude. We could get like nine. Nine films out of this.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

We just have like. We can continue to make this movie.

[Bobby Lee]

What were we hunting? What do you mean?

[Andrew Santino]

We're avenging our mother's death. We're trying to find who killed our mom.

[Stavros Halkias]

Maybe she's.

[Bobby Lee]

That's it.

[Andrew Santino]

It was one of the guys that she slept with that killed her.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, right, right.

[Andrew Santino]

And we're avenging her death.

[Bobby Lee]

Maybe.

[Andrew Santino]

You know what I mean? It's a party at the beginning, but then it's like, we gotta get down to business, dude. Like, we have to get real. We hunt down our mother's killer.

[Bobby Lee]

But then there's one name on the tree that's written like there's blood in it. You mean it just says Frank, right?

[Stavros Halkias]

It was a demon that killed her.

[Bobby Lee]

What?

[Stavros Halkias]

We bite off more than we can chew.

[Andrew Santino]

That's right.

[Stavros Halkias]

Now we're fighting off. We kill off all. We kill our biological bodies.

[Bobby Lee]

We kill everyone on the street. And the Last name is Big Frank Blood 1. But maybe this is the. You know.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, I like this.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, you like it.

[Andrew Santino]

So now we're fighting the underworld, right?

[Stavros Halkias]

Exactly. We're badass. The first like half hour of the movie, and then we find the last. How about this? It goes back to we just kill everyone. Our mom. We don't like. We don't like living in a world where a guy. Right.

[Bobby Lee]

But there's got to be a Big.

[Andrew Santino]

Because we couldn't stop hearing about it. The beginning of the movie is just us as kids hearing about it the whole time. Everyone coming up to us be like.

[Bobby Lee]

Bigfoot has to be in it.

[Andrew Santino]

Bigfoot has to be in.

[Stavros Halkias]

My mom could. Bigfoot. She could be one of the things.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, maybe that's Frank. I don't know.

[Andrew Santino]

Frank. Bigfoot Frank.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Bigfoot Frank.

[Stavros Halkias]

Or a vampire. Or you could be a vampire.

[Bobby Lee]

But how about. You know what you've never seen?

[Stavros Halkias]

What's that?

[Bobby Lee]

A combo. In fact, dude, let me just Throw this out.

[Andrew Santino]

The vampire.

[Bobby Lee]

Acorns.

[Andrew Santino]

I love it.

[Bobby Lee]

You like investing?

[Andrew Santino]

I like. I like investing and I like acorns.

[Bobby Lee]

You know what's. You know what? Acorns. Squirrels invest that.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, they invest for the winter. For the winter.

[Bobby Lee]

And you should be investing as a human being. I do it with money.

[Andrew Santino]

Right.

[Bobby Lee]

And I do it with acorns because winter is coming. Winter is coming on snow. Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

It's on its way. It might be here right now. Yeah, that's right. Today's episode is sponsored by Acorns. Acorns makes it easy to start automatically saving and investing so your money has a chance to grow for you, your kids, retirement, or whomever you want to.

[Bobby Lee]

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[Andrew Santino]

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[Bobby Lee]

And to my audience, to our audience.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Excuse me.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, no problem.

[Bobby Lee]

It's. There's a security. There's a sense of relief almost when you are putting little nuts away.

[Andrew Santino]

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[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

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[Bobby Lee]

Head to acorns.com bad friends or download the Acorns app to start saving investing for your future today.

[Andrew Santino]

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[Bobby Lee]

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[Andrew Santino]

The semi glutide from Noom GLP1 is affordable, by the way, starting at just $149 and a lot of people out right now. Bob, I love trying to lose a couple lbs.

[Bobby Lee]

I use semaglutide.

[Andrew Santino]

You do because you wanted to lose a couple lbs. And guess what?

[Bobby Lee]

It's working.

[Andrew Santino]

You did.

[Bobby Lee]

Yep.

[Andrew Santino]

Yes. You did it. Noom is more than just meds, by the way. All right. It does have the GLP one that's shipped directly to your door in seven days, but also comes with muscle defense, help you keep that muscle and lose the fat. And by the way this is guided, you know, you're going to get yourself access to a doctor, a supportive community, a coach, people that can help you with this process all within the app that's right on your phone. It's pretty impressive.

[Bobby Lee]

And you can ask your care team anything and get support with medication and side effect management.

[Andrew Santino]

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[Bobby Lee]

Holy moly. Start your GLP1 journey today at Noom.com. that's Noom n o o m dot com.

[Andrew Santino]

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[Stavros Halkias]

I like Bigfoot, dude.

[Bobby Lee]

He's hairy, but he wears a fucking black cloak, right? You like, you know, one of those black caves, but he's super hairy.

[Stavros Halkias]

How about this?

[Andrew Santino]

The idea the same though, because vampires don't aren't really seen that often. Big Bigfoot's never seen that often, so he moves as seamlessly as Bigfoot does.

[Stavros Halkias]

Okay, well, go ahead, Bobby.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, you know, when I have an idea, you know what I mean, I gotta toss it up. So later in the movie reveal, we meet the guy, right, Frank, the. The vampire. Right, The Big Frank.

[Stavros Halkias]

Or is that just working name for him?

[Bobby Lee]

No, we can figure it out. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, that could be open to new sand lucid. No, we'll go with that.

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, The Manhattan. The Manhattan Killer.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, Luigi. What's his name? Yeah, yeah, we'll just call him Mangioni. Mangione, Right, right. And we later reveals, we see his penis and it's been stitched on there. She's got a Franken dick, too.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, wow.

[Bobby Lee]

I mean, okay, it's. What do you think? He's got like stitches.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, we gaining from that.

[Bobby Lee]

It's like Shaquille O'Neal's dick. Like it's a black dick.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, they were. Yeah, incorporate back in the day, right?

[Andrew Santino]

Back in the tent.

[Stavros Halkias]

Back to your sexual desires. Back to the Bigfoot. Back to the Bigfoot. No, you take us to the tent with the black cock. Let's get back to the movie, dude.

[Bobby Lee]

I can incorporate another movie into it, guy. All right. Shazam.

[Andrew Santino]

Another black guy. I get it, Dick. I get it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're back to 10.

[Bobby Lee]

Was it Shukila Neil? A movie called Shazam? That character.

[Stavros Halkias]

I know. There's no bad ideas in brainstorming. I know that. I'm just saying maybe let's reel us back and. I think we were. All right, all right.

[Bobby Lee]

We'll take out the Franken Dick.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's getting a little too mystical. We need to pick one magical thing. All right with it.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, we combined the. That's fine. That's enough.

[Andrew Santino]

You can't take it out. Art already built the dick. We already have them building it right now.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, we do?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, they're working on it.

[Bobby Lee]

All right. We'll keep it in there.

[Andrew Santino]

All right, it's in.

[Bobby Lee]

And, you know, for the airplanes, we'll just cut that scene out or blur.

[Andrew Santino]

Expensive. Too expensive.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. Anyway. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Got it.

[Bobby Lee]

And he.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, you want to do the voice of Bigfoot?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, maybe.

[Andrew Santino]

I thought we'd hire somebody, but I did.

[Stavros Halkias]

Wait, what if it's. What if you play the Bigfoot, too in the. In the makeup? And what if we find out. Okay, here's how we get three different mystical things in. We find out who our dads were. Are three monsters that up? Oh, we kill all these regular guys, and that doesn't solve anything.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay.

[Stavros Halkias]

And then we find out your dad was a Bigfoot, and it's you and, like, a bunch of makeup and, like.

[Bobby Lee]

Where the is my dad? Book? Big football.

[Andrew Santino]

You know who you are.

[Bobby Lee]

Why am I Bigfoot?

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, no. It should be a dwarf, Bobby.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, I know. That's good.

[Andrew Santino]

You're Little Foot.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, Little Foot.

[Stavros Halkias]

I think mine's better for you. I don' wise Things were mad at me making you a strong.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, you're right. You're right. You're right, dude.

[Andrew Santino]

If your father's Bigfoot, you're Little Foot.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

You'd be the dickless elf. That's what they're doing. I'm, like, strong.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, you're right. You're right. Bigfoot. Thank you. That's my dad. Well, who is your dad?

[Stavros Halkias]

I could.

[Bobby Lee]

I know.

[Stavros Halkias]

Go ahead.

[Bobby Lee]

Your dad was an Oompa Loompa.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay. What is this?

[Stavros Halkias]

Bobby, You've turned on me.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. You were on his team. I know.

[Bobby Lee]

What?

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, I remember this movie. Little Bigfoot.

[Stavros Halkias]

It was a great movie.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, dude, that's our movie.

[Bobby Lee]

Let's just remake that movie. Yeah, scrap the whole thing.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, I got it. My dad will be Loch Ness. The Loch Ness Monster.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, so we're incorporating more. Wow.

[Andrew Santino]

That's it, I see.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

That's very. A redhead.

[Bobby Lee]

That's pretty cool, dude.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

But I apologize about the Oompa Loompa, dude. That was my bad.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, come and come up with someone better then.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay, I will.

[Andrew Santino]

His dad.

[Bobby Lee]

Dad. What?

[Andrew Santino]

Who's his dad? What is this? Guys?

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, the Stay Puft Marshmallow. All right, very good, marshmallow man from Ghostbusters.

[Bobby Lee]

I think it would be.

[Stavros Halkias]

Okay, then. It's a good suggestion. Let's talk.

[Bobby Lee]

He's a gas, dude.

[Andrew Santino]

Time out.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, give me Greek.

[Andrew Santino]

Mythical. Greek, Mythical.

[Bobby Lee]

There we go. Let's go mythic.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, you know what mythical creature?

[Stavros Halkias]

Danny DeVito from Hercules. A pan. Half goats half. That's 100%. Yeah, yeah. Look up Phil from Hercules.

[Andrew Santino]

He just said, look up Phil from Hercules. He typed out Danny.

[Bobby Lee]

That's so you, dude. What is that, a Tasmanian devil? What is it?

[Stavros Halkias]

It's a pig. I think it's called a pan.

[Bobby Lee]

A pan. Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

And they were horny, too. They were half goat, half manhorn. It's actually so. Right. It's up.

[Bobby Lee]

Let's end the movie. Let's. Let's finish the movie. Okay, so, like. All right, so we'll figure out who our dads are.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

We run into the. The vlog. That's Sasquatch with the Franken dick.

[Stavros Halkias]

Okay. What?

[Bobby Lee]

You're back there.

[Stavros Halkias]

I thought we. I thought we were gone with the Black Frankenstein.

[Andrew Santino]

Listen, listen.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

If you're quiet, you can hear the. The zippers opening up the tent. I can hear.

[Stavros Halkias]

So I also just love that Jim is doing, like, grassroots, like.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Pro trans or jack off organizing.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Just trying to get one friend at a time. He's like, give. He's walking you through who.

[Bobby Lee]

No, I asked. I asked. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. He didn't. You know, I go, who's out there?

[Andrew Santino]

Don't take it so serious, man. He's just setting it up.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

So defensive.

[Bobby Lee]

No, because I don't want Jim to hear it.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

You know, man, Go. Whoa, dude.

[Andrew Santino]

First of all, Jim knows we love and respect him.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

And. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And that.

[Bobby Lee]

Apologize.

[Stavros Halkias]

Star Rose and Jim's not listening.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, you're right.

[Andrew Santino]

We're being very clear. Yeah, no chance.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, that's my bad.

[Andrew Santino]

So, okay, how does the movie end, Bob?

[Stavros Halkias]

So we have. We killed our mythical dads.

[Andrew Santino]

Can't be that easy.

[Stavros Halkias]

Or do we become them?

[Andrew Santino]

We become them as more.

[Stavros Halkias]

How about we kill them and we think we've done this. Then we become them.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, we got to.

[Stavros Halkias]

And then we. We start the prophecy all and then we go some starts all over get together. But there's.

[Bobby Lee]

There's going to be like a multiverse thing. Cuz all of them have it. We got to put it in there.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay, so how do we get.

[Stavros Halkias]

Multiverse is hack now, dude. It's over, it's out, it's done.

[Bobby Lee]

Really? Because if we go to another thing and then Sasquatch, like it could be like Emanuel Lewis's. You know what I mean? Emanuel penis. You know, you're right. I'm zippering. Yeah, Yeah. I gotta get out of the tent. You're right, you're right. Okay. All right. You know, we'll figure that out later. Okay.

[Stavros Halkias]

Did you find him attractive? You were a boy. He. You know what I mean?

[Bobby Lee]

We'll figure it out. We'll figure it out.

[Stavros Halkias]

When you watch that show, did you find him hot?

[Bobby Lee]

Who?

[Stavros Halkias]

Emmanuel Lewis.

[Bobby Lee]

No, but he used to. I remember I told you he used to call me randomly at like 2, 3 in the morning. Hey, Bob, I'm in town from Atlanta.

[Andrew Santino]

And you never would hang out and.

[Bobby Lee]

I never would hang out with them.

[Andrew Santino]

So sad.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I didn't know.

[Stavros Halkias]

I wanted to borrow some clothes. I forgot my sweaters. Do you have something I could wear, Bob?

[Bobby Lee]

Maybe. Maybe that was it.

[Andrew Santino]

Let me borrow a jacket. Yeah, it's cold in la.

[Bobby Lee]

You never. I never hung out with them because I don't. I don't know, it's just.

[Andrew Santino]

You don't hang out.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I don't hang out.

[Andrew Santino]

You don't hang out?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, I don't hang out.

[Andrew Santino]

You're gonna hang out. It's gonna be with me at most. Otherwise you don't hang out. Or a girl.

[Bobby Lee]

Do we have stars like that anymore though? I mean we had the Verne Troyers and the Gary Coleman's. There's no little. But he's not really a little. He's like a. You know, here.

[Andrew Santino]

Peter Dinklage is a.

[Bobby Lee]

That's right.

[Andrew Santino]

That's true.

[Bobby Lee]

That's right. You just threw it out there.

[Andrew Santino]

He's the one.

[Bobby Lee]

He's the one.

[Andrew Santino]

Warwick Davis is still doing his thing.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Vern Troy, rest in peace. Tony Cox, rest in peace.

[Bobby Lee]

What about that little guy that was R2D2.

[Stavros Halkias]

He's definitely dead.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

What's that guy's name again? I can't remember his name.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't know.

[Andrew Santino]

He's a famous actor.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

No, it was. Wasn't famous.

[Andrew Santino]

No, he was. He actually What? Kenny Baker.

[Bobby Lee]

Kenny Baker, that's right.

[Andrew Santino]

No, he was.

[Bobby Lee]

There's Kenny Baker. Imagine being in that metal suit. He probably all day long.

[Andrew Santino]

Probably loved it. Probably loved it.

[Stavros Halkias]

They haven't approached you to get.

[Bobby Lee]

Aren't you.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm not even joking. Yeah, haven't they? Dude, I would assume they would ask you to be in like the extended Star wars universe with some kind of little guy. For real. You'd be awesome at it. Not in the.

[Andrew Santino]

Let me hear you do some R2D2. Beep bop boop. Let me see. No, they're not gonna catch it.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm not going. I gotta drink some water.

[Stavros Halkias]

Please. For real. I think like in the Mandalorian or in the.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay, so. I swear to God. Yeah, I auditioned for that last one. You know, the lady with the hair head thing.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, yes, yes.

[Bobby Lee]

Right.

[Andrew Santino]

In the Mandalorian.

[Bobby Lee]

No, it was the lady with the head thing. Yeah, the last one.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, what's her face? Lupita Nyong'o did the voice.

[Bobby Lee]

Exactly.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

And I auditioned for like a nine armed alien and I didn't even come close.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, that's.

[Bobby Lee]

I didn't even come close.

[Stavros Halkias]

They should have picked.

[Andrew Santino]

What do you think it was?

[Stavros Halkias]

You know, you'd be great as. You know.

[Bobby Lee]

What are you implying?

[Andrew Santino]

No, I'm just saying. What do you think it was?

[Bobby Lee]

What the are you implying?

[Andrew Santino]

What do you think the reason you didn't even come close was?

[Bobby Lee]

I didn't read good. They didn't see me as the part, bro. What are you implying, dog?

[Andrew Santino]

Well, nine arms is hard to fit on your little body. I mean, they get maybe six.

[Stavros Halkias]

Well, I mean they could be small arms.

[Andrew Santino]

I gotta be real small. I mean those two barely fit on that frame. Stop it.

[Bobby Lee]

It's good.

[Andrew Santino]

Stop it. But it's like nine.

[Bobby Lee]

I think you're right.

[Andrew Santino]

Also nine. How do they. How are they.

[Bobby Lee]

They could rewrite it.

[Andrew Santino]

Why an odd number of arms?

[Bobby Lee]

I don't know.

[Andrew Santino]

Where's the miss.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Sided arms.

[Stavros Halkias]

There's probably just a voice thing, right?

[Bobby Lee]

No, it was an actual guy.

[Andrew Santino]

Practical.

[Bobby Lee]

Practical costume. Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Damn, you would have been awesome.

[Bobby Lee]

Like a body hunt. Like a. It was not a bounty hunter.

[Stavros Halkias]

That pisses me off. Who got it it. Let's fucking find him and fuck him up.

[Bobby Lee]

I never get those things.

[Andrew Santino]

It's probably such an accredited actor that we're like, I get it.

[Bobby Lee]

I mean, do you read for. Have you ever read for a Marvel or a Star wars buddy?

[Andrew Santino]

What are they gonna do with me?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, I have and I Never get them.

[Andrew Santino]

If I could have gotten anything, it would have been whatever Bird did in the Mandalorian.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's true. If Burr was busy.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Let's go get Santino.

[Stavros Halkias]

You do it in his. The. And the impression you do.

[Andrew Santino]

Like, you want me to be him, like. Well, you know what we do, come.

[Bobby Lee]

To think about, you look like BB2. What's. What's the new little robot?

[Andrew Santino]

BBA?

[Bobby Lee]

BB8.

[Stavros Halkias]

All right, well, you could be Babu Frick. How about that?

[Bobby Lee]

There you are, dude. BB8.

[Stavros Halkias]

Now let's pull up Babu Frick.

[Bobby Lee]

All right. That is all right. You win this. Literally, dude. You win this. Dude. That is me, bro. You know how he was cute? What did he say? How was he talking? Like, he didn't really speak, did he?

[Stavros Halkias]

He was fucking.

[Bobby Lee]

He was so cute, that guy.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, I can't. I can't understand you most of the time. So it lines up.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Feel kind of like Babu Frick.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I'm Baba Frick, dude. I'm a Frick. What a cute one.

[Andrew Santino]

Whoever made that, dude, that's such a good looking character.

[Stavros Halkias]

I've never. I don't even know what happens in the new Star Wars. I've seen them all just so out of my mind on acid or mushroom.

[Andrew Santino]

Really?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Never sober.

[Stavros Halkias]

Never sober. Go in.

[Andrew Santino]

I haven't seen any of the new ones. I'm not. I just am not there.

[Stavros Halkias]

I don't think they're good, but to me, they are my favorite ones because I was so fucked up. Like, I mean. Mean, I've told this story before. I want to say it too much, but I. People thought I was like special needs. When I saw the Babu Frick one, because it was like Christmas and I was on. I was so up. I was with my brother, my best friend, and every time he would come on the screen, I would be like.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

But I've told that story a hundred times, but I literally like. And so for me, I have no. Like, the old ones I saw when I was a little kid.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

So I don't remember them.

[Andrew Santino]

And you didn't rewatch them as an adult.

[Stavros Halkias]

Not really.

[Andrew Santino]

That's worth.

[Stavros Halkias]

Prequels. The prequels. I like the last.

[Bobby Lee]

Can I ask you some trivia?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, sure. I'm not gonna get it right, because I've seen.

[Bobby Lee]

Would you like to play some Star wars trivia or. No.

[Andrew Santino]

Shoot for the hip.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

Go, baby.

[Stavros Halkias]

So when you were. When you were in college and Star wars came out, how did that feel?

[Andrew Santino]

So funny to think he went to college.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay, I'm sorry.

[Stavros Halkias]

You're a bull.

[Bobby Lee]

Luke Skywalker, his uncle. What was his name? He got burnt to a crisp, remember? You guys know. Oh, I got.

[Stavros Halkias]

No, I don't know.

[Bobby Lee]

Uncle Owen.

[Andrew Santino]

Uncle Owen.

[Stavros Halkias]

I did know.

[Bobby Lee]

Are you being real? Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

By the way, by the way, bad character name.

[Stavros Halkias]

Owen.

[Andrew Santino]

Owen is just kind of like a weak name. Yeah, there's no depth to it for. For that. For how.

[Bobby Lee]

Like, wasn't he Ben Kenobi's brother, though? No, I think there was a relationship between Owen and Ben Kenobi that was. That's family.

[Andrew Santino]

What, that they were related?

[Bobby Lee]

I think. So what is it?

[Andrew Santino]

I mean, Owen Lars is Anakin Skywalker's stepbrother, perceived as the brother Jedi Master Obi Wan Kenobi.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, so there is some family. Okay, so then those little. Little guys in Star wars with the. They're wearing monk hoods. They're little with glowing gold eyes. What are they called?

[Stavros Halkias]

The Sand People.

[Bobby Lee]

No, the Sand People were the Iranians or whatever. That was.

[Andrew Santino]

Careful.

[Stavros Halkias]

They are called Sand People. And that is kind of. But Kenobi is kind of weird about it because they have an actual name, but he calls them Sand People.

[Bobby Lee]

But that's not who I'm talking about, Was it?

[Andrew Santino]

My uncle was in this movie.

[Bobby Lee]

They're called Jawas.

[Andrew Santino]

Jawa.

[Stavros Halkias]

But he calls them Sand People.

[Bobby Lee]

There's two Sand People are the ones that try to kill Luke. Right? They're two different things.

[Andrew Santino]

You're not gonna get away with this, guy.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

They're not.

[Bobby Lee]

No, they're not the same thing. Look up a Sand People in Star Wars. Look it up. Give me the image.

[Andrew Santino]

Look up Sand People on Carlos's computer. I'm afraid it would have come back up.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's a sandpaper.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's a sandpaper person Than that.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Jawas are different.

[Andrew Santino]

And can we say person of sand instead of.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, you're right.

[Stavros Halkias]

I prefer respect. I take it back.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay, can we continue? You haven't answered anything.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't want to.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yet you're going to.

[Andrew Santino]

I let you go.

[Bobby Lee]

No, no.

[Andrew Santino]

First of all, you asked him for the.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm going to ask you now. Okay, okay. What planet does Yoda live on?

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh.

[Andrew Santino]

God, my memory's so bad.

[Bobby Lee]

You don't know.

[Andrew Santino]

I do know.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

No, no.

[Stavros Halkias]

It starts with a Dagobah.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, that's right. That's right, bud.

[Andrew Santino]

I do know.

[Bobby Lee]

Last question.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

It was originally colonized by Italians.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, that's true.

[Stavros Halkias]

By space Italian.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. So last question.

[Andrew Santino]

Got these space guys coming over here.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, I ain't going.

[Bobby Lee]

Empire Strikes Back. What's the snowy planet that?

[Stavros Halkias]

Hoth.

[Bobby Lee]

That's right. Yeah. So you really have never seen any of them?

[Andrew Santino]

No, I have. What are you talking about?

[Stavros Halkias]

I played the games. I played the. I played the.

[Andrew Santino]

I remember any games.

[Bobby Lee]

The one is the Battlefront. You ever play that?

[Stavros Halkias]

I didn't play that because that one's more. What's the one where you get to be kind of a. You just get to run the open world?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

I played those Jedi. Those Jedi ones.

[Bobby Lee]

Right, right.

[Stavros Halkias]

Your own Jedi.

[Bobby Lee]

This is the new one.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, I haven't played those, but Battlefront.

[Bobby Lee]

Was fun, you know? You know how Battlefront's played?

[Andrew Santino]

No, I don't play. I don't play.

[Stavros Halkias]

How was battle from.

[Andrew Santino]

How was it played?

[Bobby Lee]

Well, you. You. So you just play as like. It's like Stormtroopers versus the Rebels, right? And there's like, you're playing everyone online and you're a Stormtrooper. Right. And it's like just chaos. Yeah, right. I mean, you're like killing rebels, right? And if you kill enough in a row, you get to choose to be, you know, I mean, Luke Skywalker. Like, if you get enough kills and then for like a minute, you. You have a lightsaber and you can just people up. It's such a fun game.

[Andrew Santino]

That is kind of.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, let's move on from Star Wars. I feel like you're. I'm boring.

[Stavros Halkias]

I feel like I'm 24 year old.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Tinder.

[Bobby Lee]

You never saw Phantom Menace? Than the new ones with the J.J. abrams ones?

[Andrew Santino]

None of the new ones, no.

[Bobby Lee]

Wow. You've seen them?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Because of the little guy? Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Only when I was a kid. I only saw the ones when we were young.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

And I. When I was in high school, I liked him.

[Bobby Lee]

You're not a sci fi guy, though.

[Andrew Santino]

Not a sci fi guy.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. You're a sci fi, right?

[Stavros Halkias]

I like sci fi.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I know. Similar. Yeah, we're similar. Many.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm open to sci fi.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Sci fi has to be for me. Like it. No, I. I like fantasy more than sci fi.

[Stavros Halkias]

I like fantasy like a horse. You like an elf.

[Andrew Santino]

I like fantasy over sci fi. I know. I like. I just like. I like whimsical, I think, like out of the, like out of world stuff. That's like weirdo.

[Stavros Halkias]

Lord of the Rings over Star wars, kind of.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm not gonna say that it's better than Star Wars. Star wars is just so good because when we were kids, it was so different.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And it was the only thing that was in space.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. I guess I'm not. I guess. I guess what I'm thinking of is like a couple, like a.

[Andrew Santino]

A.

[Stavros Halkias]

A few bangers. Like Total Recall.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Great movie.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay. Right, right, right. I was more too, like Blade Runner. Comedy whimsy.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Like cone heads. Love.

[Stavros Halkias]

Okay, okay, interesting.

[Andrew Santino]

Like comedy whimsy. Like. Like imp. Impractical comedy. I love that.

[Stavros Halkias]

High, high concept, like crazy comedy.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, that's obviously not real. Yeah, I love that. I mean, like, Princess Bride might be one of the best written comedy films of all time. Time, front to back.

[Bobby Lee]

That's a great movie.

[Andrew Santino]

And the whimsy in that movie is.

[Bobby Lee]

You never saw it. Yeah. So great movie. Were you a Never Ending Story guy?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yes.

[Andrew Santino]

I loved Atreyu.

[Bobby Lee]

Never Ending Story.

[Andrew Santino]

By the way, you know who followed me on Instagram the other day? Speaking of the dog from that movie?

[Bobby Lee]

I try. You or the dog?

[Andrew Santino]

First of all, first of all, his name. His dog is not the name.

[Bobby Lee]

What about the. The big turtle was in there.

[Andrew Santino]

The name of the big dog.

[Bobby Lee]

No, it's okay. Give me the first F. He just said it.

[Andrew Santino]

No, he didn't.

[Bobby Lee]

Did you say it?

[Andrew Santino]

Shut up.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, F. There's the turtle.

[Stavros Halkias]

You know, I might rewatch Never Falcore.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, right. What's the turtle's name?

[Stavros Halkias]

Morla.

[Andrew Santino]

The Morla.

[Bobby Lee]

Wow. What a great movie.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, wait.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, you know. Follow me on Instagram. Mandy Patinkin.

[Stavros Halkias]

Wow. That's huge.

[Bobby Lee]

Who's that?

[Andrew Santino]

You don't know who Mandy Patinkin is? You're a cinephile.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, Mandy. But thank you.

[Andrew Santino]

He is an Ego Montoya. He is the Six Fingered. He is going after, by the way. You know who he's going after in the movie? Yeah, who is he going to kill? The Six Finger.

[Bobby Lee]

Is he on Homeland?

[Andrew Santino]

He is on Homeland.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. That's how I know.

[Andrew Santino]

So Mandy Patikin played Inigo Montoya, who goes after who in the film. What famous director do we know that you and I have both worked for? Played this Six fingered Man. Bring up a picture of the Six fingered man from Princess Bride. This is incredible. You've worked for this man. Who is that guy?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I know it's Christopher Guest, but I never worked for him.

[Andrew Santino]

Wait, yeah, I thought you did.

[Bobby Lee]

That's. You know what? That's another way of you slamming my career. And that's so fucked up that you do that. So now you're Gonna. You know, I'm gonna go. I never worked for him. That. You're gonna go, oh, yeah, my bad. And then now I'm hurt. How did you work for him?

[Andrew Santino]

I'll give you six.

[Bobby Lee]

How did you work for him?

[Andrew Santino]

I'll give you six degrees of Kevin Bacon. You worked with his wife in a major motion picture.

[Bobby Lee]

That's true.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay, so that's enough.

[Bobby Lee]

How did you work for him?

[Andrew Santino]

I forgot. You didn't work with him.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, how did you work for him?

[Andrew Santino]

On a comedy project that we were just.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Never. He would never call me in.

[Andrew Santino]

No, he told me he was going to call you in.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

So couldn't get a hold of you.

[Stavros Halkias]

Why are you getting so defensive?

[Bobby Lee]

I'm not being defensive. He has a way of. He has a way of going side.

[Andrew Santino]

You did something with him.

[Bobby Lee]

I never did anything with him.

[Andrew Santino]

What about the movie he did with the little people with all. Everyone in the costume? You didn't do that?

[Bobby Lee]

No, I didn't do little people. Willow. What are you talking about?

[Andrew Santino]

What was the one where everybody was a mascot? Not.

[Stavros Halkias]

I don't remember.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I auditioned for it.

[Andrew Santino]

I thought you did it.

[Bobby Lee]

No, I never did it. I auditioned for it.

[Andrew Santino]

I apologize, but it was I. You at least auditioned.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. So I have network for him.

[Andrew Santino]

I did a show for him called Family Tree. It was. I did one throwaway episode.

[Bobby Lee]

That's great.

[Andrew Santino]

It was fantastic.

[Bobby Lee]

Congratulations, and thank you so much. God damn it, dude.

[Stavros Halkias]

I think if you feel good, no one's heard of that show.

[Andrew Santino]

That's exactly right.

[Bobby Lee]

That's true.

[Stavros Halkias]

Isn't it better to have not worked for him and. Maybe.

[Bobby Lee]

But someone got some buzz on the call movie.

[Stavros Halkias]

What's that?

[Bobby Lee]

Someone got some buzz on the cult movie.

[Stavros Halkias]

Why is this turning adversarial right now?

[Bobby Lee]

Congratulations.

[Stavros Halkias]

It seems like somebody. A demon possessed you.

[Bobby Lee]

Like a benevolent joy that you're working.

[Stavros Halkias]

I am happy for you.

[Andrew Santino]

I like how you pretend like you've never seen this show. This is exactly what he does.

[Stavros Halkias]

That is true.

[Andrew Santino]

Can't wait.

[Stavros Halkias]

But he. We were all. We're hopping along. We're talking about fucking Star Wars.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, you're right.

[Stavros Halkias]

One perceived slight and Bobby has shut down.

[Andrew Santino]

He does that now.

[Stavros Halkias]

He's acting.

[Bobby Lee]

No, I'm kidding. Very good job.

[Andrew Santino]

I need you around more.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

How about this? This will get him. This will get him in a good mood.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Blackhawk for two.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah. I'll be back in a Good Franken. Franken. DraftKings playoffs.

[Andrew Santino]

Playoffs.

[Bobby Lee]

We're talking about playoffs.

[Andrew Santino]

Playoffs. We. You bet we are. Get in on the action at DraftKings Sportsbook, an official sports betting partner of the NFL.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, my God. That's the National Football League.

[Andrew Santino]

That's right. And scoring touchdowns is key to winning the playoffs, Bobby. And you know that better than anybody. And you can score big by betting on them at DraftKings, the number one place to bet touchdowns. Ready to place your first bet, Bob? What should you do?

[Bobby Lee]

Touchdown.

[Andrew Santino]

Try betting on something simple like a player to score six.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Or a pick six. Go to DraftKings sportsbook app and make.

[Bobby Lee]

Your or three conversion.

[Andrew Santino]

That's exactly right. New DraftKings customers can bet $5 and get 200 in bonus bets instantly.

[Bobby Lee]

Download the DraftKings sportsbook app and use code Bad Friends. That's code Bad Friends for new customers to get 200 in bonus bets instantly. When you just bet 5 bucks.

[Andrew Santino]

That is so great.

[Bobby Lee]

Only on drafting Sportsbook. The crown is yours.

[Andrew Santino]

You got a gambling problem, call 1-800-GAMBLER in New York. Call 877-8-HOPE NY or text HOPE NY. That's 467-369 in Connecticut. Help is available for problem gambling. Call 888-789-7777 or visit ccpg.org Please play responsibly on behalf of Boot Hill Casino and Resort in Kansas. 21 plus. Age and eligibility varies by jurisdiction. Void. In Ontario, bonus bets expire 168 hours after issuance. For additional terms and responsible gaming resources, please see DKNG co audio. By the way, I saw a clip on the Internet of a guy finishing a marathon and his in his was ginormous and everyone is stitching it on the Internet like, is no one gonna say anything? He like finished first and his bulge was comical.

[Bobby Lee]

Let me look, let me look.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh my God.

[Bobby Lee]

I know.

[Stavros Halkias]

Bulges die. Big dick. Marathon coming. Marathon. Gay porn video.

[Andrew Santino]

I know. And by the way, save it for later fucking.

[Stavros Halkias]

You know, the tent is. It's a rhetorical device. We don't actually want to pull up pornography.

[Andrew Santino]

It get back to reality. You're. The movie is getting a lot of talk by the way. Everyone is in them streets talking.

[Stavros Halkias]

It is fun. I mean it's crazy. I. I am shocked that I got to make a movie, but yeah, it's fun. Go rent it.

[Andrew Santino]

Buy it.

[Stavros Halkias]

Buy it. Rent it on Amazon, Apple, wherever the. You buy movies now.

[Bobby Lee]

How did this. Is it something that you had pitched or is it something you just got cast in?

[Stavros Halkias]

No, I wrote it.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, you did?

[Stavros Halkias]

I wrote it with my friends and we did a Short movie or. We did a short of it, and a production company, like, wanted to make it.

[Bobby Lee]

Wow.

[Stavros Halkias]

Dark Sky Films and Queensberry Pictures, and they were just like, I'm kind of. It's kind of wild.

[Andrew Santino]

It's amazing.

[Stavros Halkias]

Like, it's just. We just made a move.

[Bobby Lee]

Amazing.

[Stavros Halkias]

And it's fun. It's stupid as. And it was like, I really do want to make. I mean, we're joking about, you know, the movie about our.

[Bobby Lee]

Our.

[Stavros Halkias]

Are we mythical fathers?

[Bobby Lee]

I think we are.

[Stavros Halkias]

It was fun as shit because, like, I really think comedy movies should just be this, where it's like, friends get together, have an idea. We all carve out. We write it over however long. We carve out a month, and we shoot it on a. On a modest budget because we know we can actually be funny. Like, right. We don't keep it super. You know, we keep it reasonable. And then, like, I mean, what the fuck have we done? Like, by getting rejected from the industry for years, we all had to build our own, like. Like, fan bases. Look at this. And I think that's what I found. It was just a test of the waters to see if it was, like, fun. But I really want to make more movies with my friends and just. Even if. Even if. Like, they don't have to be huge releases or anything, just to make stuff for the fans that people that come out to see us do stand up, who listen to our podcast, they like comedy movies too. It's just nobody's making.

[Andrew Santino]

No one's making them.

[Bobby Lee]

And so you just inspired me. I think we're gonna do it.

[Stavros Halkias]

Let's do it.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm being real. Let's do it.

[Stavros Halkias]

Let's do it.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You know we got to do that, right?

[Bobby Lee]

I will write.

[Andrew Santino]

We have to do it.

[Bobby Lee]

We're gonna do it.

[Andrew Santino]

You'll do it?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. 100, dude.

[Andrew Santino]

All right.

[Bobby Lee]

I want to do it really bad. That'd be great, dude, because, you know, it's. It's inspiring. You know, it's like. I think you're right. I think we have. I mean, because you get approached all the time, you know? I mean, and to read or, like, you. I mean, to look at my script, but it's like, I don't. Oh, really? You're trying to do a Christopher Guest thing again? I'm doing that. I'm not doing that.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't get it all the time. I don't get approached all the time.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't have a deal with NBC in place where I'm diving, developing a show. About an Asian.

[Bobby Lee]

You want one for Hulu?

[Andrew Santino]

I don't have one.

[Bobby Lee]

You have a hula show?

[Andrew Santino]

I have a special on Hulu and.

[Bobby Lee]

A show with me on Hulu. Right.

[Andrew Santino]

You're on that show.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, dude. We picture.

[Stavros Halkias]

By the way, where are these. I'm looking for a fat bug or a fat bird or something for this.

[Andrew Santino]

Show, by the way. You think you're not going to be on the show.

[Bobby Lee]

100 your mind.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

No. Read nothing.

[Stavros Halkias]

Love it.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't want to give it away, but I do. There is. Trust me.

[Stavros Halkias]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

Don't worry about it.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm interested.

[Andrew Santino]

We already have the people that we have in our sight lines of who we want on this show. And Bobby wants a lot good cameos in the pilot. So Bill Cosby said he would do.

[Stavros Halkias]

A. I think you guys go way back.

[Bobby Lee]

Space is coming back.

[Stavros Halkias]

That would be.

[Bobby Lee]

He plays the principal.

[Andrew Santino]

You boys have been bad.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Well, it's also. I don't know if you guys feel. But I. It's also cool cuz it is a ton of people and it feels fun. It feels like it's a team instead.

[Andrew Santino]

Of like you feel like you're in on something.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Instead of stand up where you're just by yourself. Especially a movie where you get to. Because I did get to cast some of my friends in that one. But it's like. That's another thing about. About the next.

[Bobby Lee]

We never really.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Not got.

[Bobby Lee]

Not us. I'm not. We never got.

[Andrew Santino]

Not even a. Not even.

[Stavros Halkias]

You actually did.

[Andrew Santino]

No, I didn't.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, you did.

[Andrew Santino]

Did I?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

But you couldn't do it.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh. Because I was gone.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

That's actually true.

[Stavros Halkias]

And there was no part for you. We couldn't afford you, Bob. Were you gonna play my dad? What did you want to play? Do you want to play the newscaster that he didn't play and Tom Papa did.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Tommy Papa did it.

[Stavros Halkias]

You wouldn't have. You're not Use caster. Let's be honest.

[Andrew Santino]

Let's see you read the news. Read what? Re. Give us. Bring up.

[Stavros Halkias]

Bring up about.

[Bobby Lee]

You're right. You're right.

[Andrew Santino]

Wait wait. Bring up the shooting in. In. In midtown and let me see him read this. Read this as if it. Let me see you read this. Let me see if you.

[Bobby Lee]

I wasn't even vying for the part. What the Is going on here, dude?

[Andrew Santino]

Let's hear it.

[Bobby Lee]

I wasn't. Right.

[Andrew Santino]

Zoom in.

[Bobby Lee]

Ready?

[Andrew Santino]

There you go. Just the first line.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Hi. I'm Frank Magione.

[Stavros Halkias]

No, no, no. The guy's name is Mick.

[Andrew Santino]

You're fired.

[Bobby Lee]

No, I got to create my name. Name?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, you need a name.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. I'm Troy Fukimoto for ABC, Channel 7 news. Luigi Maggione, the suspect in the killing of UnitedHealthcare CEO Brian Thompson, is fighting his extradition to New York, where he faces a murder charge. He was denied bail during a court appearance in Pennsylvania.

[Andrew Santino]

I can't believe you can't do that with the ad reads. That's remarkable.

[Stavros Halkias]

Producers on that one.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

It takes us an hour and a half.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Cold reading. So could I have done it? You could if I would have practiced.

[Andrew Santino]

You're that talented.

[Stavros Halkias]

You don't have the look, man. I'm sorry.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, it's okay. You know, and we've heard that our whole career. And trust me, the next project I have, you don't have the look for anything. And that's a guarantee.

[Andrew Santino]

Wait a minute, wait a minute.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

If you really want to come to. First of all, I don't know. If you were friends then. I shot it last June. I think I might have done several.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't care. I get how it works.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Right. I didn't come to your mind? It's fine.

[Stavros Halkias]

No, no, that's.

[Bobby Lee]

There's no. It's fine. I have no resentment. I'm just saying.

[Stavros Halkias]

You don't think I want.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm just saying, when we do our movie, you're not gonna be in it.

[Stavros Halkias]

Why?

[Bobby Lee]

Okay.

[Stavros Halkias]

I ain't standing up.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. You always get offers that you say no, so don't complain.

[Andrew Santino]

I do not.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, you do. Every time. Dude, that's not true.

[Stavros Halkias]

I was pumped to have you on tires.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Did you do tires?

[Bobby Lee]

We were in Australia. Oh, tour. Yeah, we tour, too.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. You.

[Andrew Santino]

There you go.

[Stavros Halkias]

I would love to have you on time.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. And I'm not doing Cult Part two or whatever the. In the movie. Yeah. Off.

[Stavros Halkias]

I wanted you. I was happy.

[Bobby Lee]

All right.

[Stavros Halkias]

I was happy.

[Bobby Lee]

When we can't play a newscaster, I'll show you.

[Stavros Halkias]

Dude, there is no newscaster in the world. Except maybe, like, Malaysia. That look.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Connie Chong, she is so much more static.

[Bobby Lee]

You're right, you're right, you're right, you're right, you're right, you're right, you're right, you're right, you're right, you're right, you're right, you're right. Yeah. You know, I'll be honest with you. Star Rose in the animated show, I'm going to have to get you a lot of work there?

[Stavros Halkias]

Hell, yeah, dude.

[Bobby Lee]

And whatever projects that we come up with and that I'm involved with, I will have you on because I just think you're super talented. I know. The street doesn't go both ways.

[Stavros Halkias]

No, it's.

[Bobby Lee]

But, but, but, but, but, but.

[Andrew Santino]

Keep going. Go ahead.

[Bobby Lee]

I know the street. Let's listen, listen. Sometimes streets don't go both ways, right?

[Andrew Santino]

These two streets do.

[Bobby Lee]

Do these streets?

[Andrew Santino]

These are two ways.

[Bobby Lee]

Two ways, two ways. And a freeway off ramp. There's an off freeway off ramp. There's the whole thing. And an on bridge, all that stuff. Right? This is a one way, dead end street. Right, but it's fine.

[Stavros Halkias]

Dude, how I eat my mother's cookies.

[Bobby Lee]

You know, I'll be honest with you. I did not like it. All right. My Korean grandmother can make better. All right, now you're being. Now off, dude.

[Stavros Halkias]

Try the other one. Try the other one.

[Andrew Santino]

Wait, wait, wait, wait.

[Stavros Halkias]

Go eat another.

[Andrew Santino]

Dude. Dude, stop it.

[Stavros Halkias]

Eat. They're right there.

[Andrew Santino]

Stop.

[Stavros Halkias]

Eat a different cookie.

[Andrew Santino]

Eat the brown one.

[Bobby Lee]

You're right, it's not good. Yeah, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Eat the brown one and tell me.

[Bobby Lee]

It'S not good on camera.

[Stavros Halkias]

Please do.

[Bobby Lee]

What do you think? What's.

[Stavros Halkias]

The brown one's not good.

[Bobby Lee]

The one that looks like poo, you mean?

[Andrew Santino]

Stop it. I'm sorry, can I say something about this exchange right now? I just want to put this out to the world so people understand because we're such close friends. But Bobby, you don't let no Asian comedian talk about no Greek mama's baklava. That's law. Don't let no Asian comedian talk about no Greek mama's baklava. That's law.

[Stavros Halkias]

That is law.

[Bobby Lee]

You know, where I come from, we talk about Greek mamas.

[Stavros Halkias]

Just eat the food.

[Bobby Lee]

All right, so eat the brown. Let me describe it first.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay?

[Bobby Lee]

This is like donkey poo.

[Andrew Santino]

No, dude, don't be out of line right now.

[Stavros Halkias]

You got it.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm being serious.

[Bobby Lee]

You do it like I don't know what you're doing right now.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's a olive oil.

[Andrew Santino]

This guy's mother. This guy's mother is a queen and made this for you. You eat it and you be nice freshly.

[Stavros Halkias]

You'll be nicely crushed walnuts.

[Andrew Santino]

You don't talk bad about his mom.

[Stavros Halkias]

Said my mother's cookies look like donkey.

[Andrew Santino]

That's right.

[Bobby Lee]

I wasn't even done with the description. With little tiny dried maggots on it.

[Andrew Santino]

Keep in mind, keep in mind, when the show' over. Yeah, he can you up I would never.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I don't think he would.

[Stavros Halkias]

I would never. But I could.

[Andrew Santino]

But he could.

[Stavros Halkias]

But I would.

[Bobby Lee]

I know you could. And let's get out. Yeah, you're a man. You're a man, dude. Right? You got man strength.

[Andrew Santino]

All right, take a bite.

[Bobby Lee]

Is this the thing?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yes.

[Bobby Lee]

All right.

[Andrew Santino]

Phenomenal.

[Stavros Halkias]

And be real about it.

[Andrew Santino]

Go ahead, take a sip. Don't have to chew into the mic. People in audio, people in their cars, they're so big. Rated honestly. Out of 10. Out of 10.

[Bobby Lee]

I call it the Bangladesh road cookie.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, my God. What, you think that was made by feet?

[Bobby Lee]

No, dude, if I was on a road in Bangladesh.

[Stavros Halkias]

You are so full. All right, we get it. You're a good actor. You're pretending.

[Bobby Lee]

No, I'm being real. It's a Bangladesh road cookie. It's the same thing, right?

[Stavros Halkias]

How have you ever been?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. And what I'm saying to you do is this. Right? Right. That's free. In Bangladesh.

[Stavros Halkias]

Out of line.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. There's nothing you can do about it. There's nothing you can do about it. I'm sure she's a nice lady, though. Dude, close your eyes. Bangladesh. Bangladesh road cookie.

[Stavros Halkias]

No. Do not play that.

[Andrew Santino]

This is so good. You know, I've said nothing but good things. When I take these home, they're.

[Bobby Lee]

It's the oic, not.

[Andrew Santino]

I'll take the whole thing home.

[Bobby Lee]

You take the whole thing.

[Andrew Santino]

Great. Cuz I love it.

[Bobby Lee]

I can't get. I can't put anything down.

[Stavros Halkias]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay, so that's my bad.

[Stavros Halkias]

Just tell me. The taste is good, though.

[Andrew Santino]

That's phenomenal.

[Bobby Lee]

I mean, the honest truth, it's.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, my God.

[Bobby Lee]

No, I'm. I'm going to be real.

[Stavros Halkias]

What kind of desserts do you like?

[Bobby Lee]

I don't know.

[Andrew Santino]

I go to duck feet. You ever had duck feet?

[Bobby Lee]

Let me be completely and utterly honest with you.

[Stavros Halkias]

Please don't start lying now.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm not going to lie. Okay.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

The. The flavor was good. The texture is not my thing.

[Andrew Santino]

Fantastic.

[Stavros Halkias]

Because it's a little soft.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. It kind of just crumbles in your mouth and it's not gonna. My thing. That's wonderful.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's so great. Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. But that's just my own thing.

[Andrew Santino]

That line is so funny. It kind of just crumbles in your mouth. That's delicious.

[Stavros Halkias]

Moist. It moist. Melts in your mouth.

[Bobby Lee]

It's got like a pumpkin spicy kind of vibe to it. It's got the white people flavor.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

His mom is from the Mediterranean.

[Stavros Halkias]

This is a. It's an olive oil based cookie, not butter. Okay. It's honey. Honey. Olive oil.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Ginger, cinnamon. None of that's. I would say explicitly white.

[Bobby Lee]

Giannis's mom and John's. John Stamos's mom would make better cookies.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, my God.

[Bobby Lee]

That's a fact. I've had that starting to get to me.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's not true.

[Bobby Lee]

And your mom. Your mom isn't really great.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, my.

[Bobby Lee]

You know what I mean? It's like a Greek adjacent. And that's fine.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's in the dirt, bro.

[Bobby Lee]

What?

[Stavros Halkias]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

His mom is dead.

[Stavros Halkias]

His mom's.

[Bobby Lee]

And she still makes better cookies. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You stop. You okay? So they're okay, guys, honestly, bro. Yeah, well, what?

[Andrew Santino]

I. I don't like this behavior, but, man, you're coming. You're coming out swinging, dude.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Swinging right now.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Insane.

[Bobby Lee]

I mean, it's the truth. And I'm a truth teller, am I not?

[Andrew Santino]

You are a truth.

[Bobby Lee]

I lay things out on the table and I just. I'm all feeling based. And my feeling is, is that it's.

[Stavros Halkias]

I, Stamos, would never bring you cookies. And, you know.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You go truth teller. Look into your glass ball.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Tell me what. Tell me what you see.

[Bobby Lee]

This is what I see. Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

Tell me what you see, dude.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, I see. Yes. Your mom isn't hairy enough to be Greek, bro.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's not a thing.

[Bobby Lee]

That's not a thing.

[Stavros Halkias]

Compliment.

[Bobby Lee]

Go back. Go back.

[Stavros Halkias]

You named a negative thing and said she did. She wasn't that.

[Bobby Lee]

That's true. That's true. I just don't do crystal ball improv.

[Stavros Halkias]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. I've never learned it.

[Andrew Santino]

You didn't take that class.

[Bobby Lee]

I didn't take that class. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

That's more groundling.

[Bobby Lee]

That's groundling stuff. Yeah. So you know what, dude? It was pretty good. And thank you so much. And. But can I be honest with you? If you never brought cookies here again, I wouldn't really even think about it.

[Andrew Santino]

I would think about it, cuz I'd want them. So bring them for me.

[Bobby Lee]

Can I honestly. Can you. Can you get this trash here?

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, my God.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm being real. I'm being real. I'm being real. I don't want. In front of me.

[Andrew Santino]

If you bring. If you bring a trash can over here and throw that in the trash can, I'm going to be pissed. Oh, my God.

[Bobby Lee]

I think I'm a cone.

[Stavros Halkias]

Don't do this.

[Andrew Santino]

Don't do this.

[Bobby Lee]

The disrespect look at my eyes, dude. Look at my eyes. Just look at my eyes right now. You know, you piece of.

[Stavros Halkias]

Do not do that.

[Bobby Lee]

Bro. He beat it.

[Andrew Santino]

Beat it.

[Bobby Lee]

Beat a kid, then he beats it. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Garbage. Garbage. Garbage, everybody.

[Andrew Santino]

How do you say garbage in Greek?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, yeah. Teach him how to say it. Just so he knows.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Scoopedia Scopedia.

[Andrew Santino]

Scoopedia. Play it for us. Click it.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Huh? Scoopedia. Scoopedia. That's insane.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You need to get back in the tent. You need to be more loving.

[Stavros Halkias]

I understand that this is because you're insecure, Bob. You're lashing out.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, no, I'm insecure. About what? Stavros?

[Stavros Halkias]

No, I honestly, legitimately don't know. But you are. And that's. That's what's causing this behavior. Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

You know what's kind of beautiful about that? That is true. He shouldn't be insecure about anything.

[Stavros Halkias]

He shouldn't.

[Andrew Santino]

It's a perfect little being. But why are you. Is why are you.

[Bobby Lee]

I feel like being intact.

[Andrew Santino]

By whom?

[Bobby Lee]

Okay, let's go back. Let's go back to the last 40. 40 minutes. That's not even it. No, that wasn't even it. Right. Number one, the short round slams.

[Andrew Santino]

You started.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay. Number two, you franken dick. Like I want to suck dick or something.

[Stavros Halkias]

You do.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't. I don't want to suck the dick. All right.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

And then number three, to pile it on, you know, he offered everybody in town a role in his movie except me. That's not right because I'm not versatile enough to play a news anchor. Okay.

[Stavros Halkias]

The only number three, Number four, was newscaster.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. Okay. Which is fine.

[Andrew Santino]

Which is an insult to me more than anything, obviously.

[Bobby Lee]

Number four, Shitty cookie. His mom never bake him cookies.

[Andrew Santino]

That's what this is about. His mom never bake him cookie. I see his brain working a thousand miles a minute. His mom never bake him. It's like another act.

[Bobby Lee]

Are you guys looking forward to nosterafu? Yeah. Are you looking forward to it or no?

[Andrew Santino]

Big time.

[Bobby Lee]

Me too. Aren't you Robert Eggers? I love him. Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. They'll be fun.

[Andrew Santino]

Are you going to see this Dylan movie or no?

[Bobby Lee]

Dylan Hill.

[Andrew Santino]

This Bob Dylan movie.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, yeah. You know what?

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm not interested in that disrespected Timmy. But I just. Those movies don't interest me. It's just like.

[Andrew Santino]

Like the Elvis movie.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Although the Elvis movie was. If Boss lman did it, I would watch the. I would watch this movie because I like Shalam and it's so weird and like, it's a fre. The pacing's crazy, like.

[Bobby Lee]

Anyway.

[Andrew Santino]

Anyway, we're not going to see it. I don't know what it is. It just turned me off. The preview doesn't look good. Coney and I talked about it, too. I'm not a huge Dylan guy.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, I don't give a fuck about.

[Bobby Lee]

I don't know.

[Stavros Halkias]

But a bunch of boomers.

[Andrew Santino]

I know I can't. But. But it does. But even still, my dad's a boomer, though. He just never was a Dylan guy either.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Which one? The Criminal or dude now the criminal.

[Andrew Santino]

The criminal. Criminal was more rock and roll.

[Stavros Halkias]

All rock.

[Bobby Lee]

Highway 61 revisited. You didn't like that? Blonde on Blonde. Blood on Tracks.

[Stavros Halkias]

Blonde on Blonde. Not if it's a pornography. If it's.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. I mean, these are M. Masterpiece albums, dude.

[Stavros Halkias]

Wait, really? Just.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm being real. These are the Dylan albums.

[Andrew Santino]

I just don't really thing.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, you think so, guy?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, I do.

[Bobby Lee]

Really? Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm going to feed into it.

[Bobby Lee]

You?

[Andrew Santino]

Well, yeah, because after Vietnam, you kind of. Were you.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. What after Vietnam? What?

[Andrew Santino]

After Vietnam, that's when you found your niche. That's like when you really started to groove.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You're just. You're fresh out of Vietnam and got back.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

You were a spy.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

They sent you into the NVA.

[Andrew Santino]

66.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I was. No, I wasn't even born yet. Thank you.

[Andrew Santino]

So they said you had to think about it, though.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm not that old. Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

You did have to siphon through that brain to go.

[Stavros Halkias]

It is crazy. Like, you do. You have. You're very youthful. It always takes me back, the first. It's awesome to watch people find out your age for the first time.

[Bobby Lee]

Well, how old are you again?

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm 35. I have the opposite.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. No, you look great. Great. You have a baby face.

[Stavros Halkias]

Thank you. Thank you.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I'm. Well, so. So when you listen. When you hear my age, you also.

[Andrew Santino]

Kind of have baby hair.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. That's good. That's really good.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, it's both.

[Bobby Lee]

53 is old.

[Andrew Santino]

No, it's not old, dude. We're just around.

[Bobby Lee]

No, I'm just saying. But that's much older than you got. No, you're 40.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm 41. You're closer. You're closer to death.

[Stavros Halkias]

I would honestly just assume you were.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

And you're.

[Bobby Lee]

You're the same demographic, Maybe.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Okay.

[Stavros Halkias]

Like, I would.

[Andrew Santino]

Because of your lifestyle. We talked about that.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. I mean, I, I, I might probably had like, life experiences different than you, I think. Like, like, you know, when I was in high school, there was no cell phones and stuff. Did you have cell phones when you were in high school? Yeah, yeah, we didn't have that, but not. Or Internet.

[Andrew Santino]

I didn't have a cell phone. Senior year.

[Stavros Halkias]

T9.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, T9. Texting.

[Stavros Halkias]

T9.

[Andrew Santino]

People got cell phones my senior years. People started to like. It started to become a thing.

[Bobby Lee]

You didn't get one though, right?

[Andrew Santino]

I did get one at the end of my senior year. Yeah. I did get one.

[Bobby Lee]

Did you beg your parents?

[Andrew Santino]

Bag, bag, bag, bag.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Got a Nokia. Little Nokia.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Little Brick.

[Bobby Lee]

And that game Snake, I played like once. All day of hours.

[Andrew Santino]

All day, all day, every single fucking day.

[Bobby Lee]

That game is so fun.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm generation. I'm, I'm. I'm super Nintendo.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, me too.

[Andrew Santino]

You're a super Nintendo too?

[Bobby Lee]

I'm in.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm Nintendo first, but then snap my shit. Okay. See that, right? So I guess I'm more super. I'm more Nintendo. You're more super Nintendo.

[Bobby Lee]

Guess what? I am.

[Andrew Santino]

And you're more Atari. No, that is Atari.

[Bobby Lee]

Intellivision.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, in. In television.

[Bobby Lee]

Ye.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

You know what Intellivision is?

[Andrew Santino]

Were you plugged in the thing?

[Bobby Lee]

No. Look up Intellivision.

[Stavros Halkias]

Damn.

[Bobby Lee]

That's what I played with. Look at that thing.

[Andrew Santino]

That looks like, that looks like funny. One of your video. One of your cousins made it.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Intellivision was incredible.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, my God. That looks pretty fun.

[Andrew Santino]

They are pretty tight.

[Stavros Halkias]

You didn't know any better.

[Andrew Santino]

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Oh, the cookies work.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, it was a cookie.

[Stavros Halkias]

The cookie came out, you cursing.

[Andrew Santino]

Right? Right. She'll hit you from anywhere. She's good.

[Bobby Lee]

Like, so there was like, in television, there was a game that was like a Dungeon and Dragons game. But basically it was like this, just a box and you were a dot. Right. I remember.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, yeah. I do know this.

[Bobby Lee]

Right? So right. Like that, that was pretty much what it was. And I went over to my friend's house and he goes, check this out and see where the green is at. Those are areas that you're not supposed to go, right? But he goes, check this out. And he went through into a green area. Area. And he goes, secret room.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm like. And at that time it was like, wow.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

He's like, what's no rules here? He started taking his pants off. Secret box. No one knows what happens while we're in here.

[Bobby Lee]

Wow. Went back to the tent, huh?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. You did?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Right. To the town.

[Stavros Halkias]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

We're figuring it out.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Secret room. No one has to know what we do.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm finding out what the lashing out is. It's. This time it's 75% latent homosexuality, 25% career anxiety. That's. That's what the cocktail of the last time was today. I just put it together.

[Andrew Santino]

I think it's. I think it's 8020, if I'm being honest. It's a little bit more because career is going good.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. But. But even. But he doesn't. He still is sensitive for some reason I don't understand, because you are awesome. You're the man and people want you and stuff, but still, you know, a little lashing out.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Shaky lashing out for no reason. And. And it's not. And it's not.

[Bobby Lee]

I respond to energy, and your energy was a little too much. He came in here like you're the boss, and I push back.

[Andrew Santino]

You wanted to make sure he knew you were the boss. That's right.

[Stavros Halkias]

The voice is back.

[Bobby Lee]

Anyway, we're all good here.

[Stavros Halkias]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

Hey, hey. Stop with the cookies.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah. But, yeah. So it looks fun. Congratulations, everybody.

[Stavros Halkias]

Were you a Dungeons and Dragons guy? Were you a DND guy?

[Bobby Lee]

No, but can I tell you about Dungeons and Dragons real quick? There's a Dungeons and Dragons movie that Chris Pine was in. Yeah, it's really good.

[Andrew Santino]

We gotta pull it up.

[Bobby Lee]

It's called. What's it called?

[Stavros Halkias]

End of Thieves or something?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that. Honor among Thieves. That movie was so surprisingly good.

[Andrew Santino]

Here's my problem. Here's my key problem. Why is there a Hawkeye in Dungeon and Dragons thing?

[Bobby Lee]

Well, he's a rogue staff Rose. Now we're back on the same page.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Make these. Make this entire cast unattractive. Make this.

[Stavros Halkias]

To pretend they're a sexy guy.

[Bobby Lee]

But I really like Avatar.

[Stavros Halkias]

This.

[Andrew Santino]

That's what every guy who plays.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Thinks they look like.

[Stavros Halkias]

Guys that look like me play think they're. That think they're getting goblin looking like that. That's the whole point.

[Andrew Santino]

You can get goblin, though.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, yeah, I do.

[Andrew Santino]

That's the.

[Bobby Lee]

Now, now, if we were in that world, would you get goblin?

[Andrew Santino]

Me?

[Stavros Halkias]

Without question.

[Andrew Santino]

No. It's not my style.

[Bobby Lee]

Well.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, you'd be only for elf. Come on, dude, relax.

[Bobby Lee]

Come on, dude.

[Andrew Santino]

Fairy elf.

[Stavros Halkias]

Every once in a while, you'd get a little goblin.

[Andrew Santino]

Can I tell you something?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I'd stick to my elves. I think I stick to my elf. My fairies, I'd stick to. My fairies are tiny, though. My favorite.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, perfect.

[Andrew Santino]

Tiny.

[Stavros Halkias]

Perfect.

[Andrew Santino]

Tiny.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Tiny fairy.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. I'm just Tinkerbell, and it just makes sense.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Imagine a fair, and then she's like, is it in? Oh, yeah, yeah. But what would you be?

[Andrew Santino]

Would you be a nymph? I'd like a nymph. I'd be more into those.

[Bobby Lee]

I'd be into alchemy.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, you'd be a. A wizard. A warlock.

[Andrew Santino]

You'd be a warlock.

[Bobby Lee]

Potions. You know, that's my whole thing.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'd want to be one of those big. I'd want to have a big axe.

[Andrew Santino]

He wants alchemy.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, you're like. You're like a Gimli.

[Stavros Halkias]

I want to be a brute.

[Bobby Lee]

You're like Gimli.

[Andrew Santino]

He wants alchemy so he can, like, pour himself a pocket.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I like collecting things. You know what I mean? Like mushrooms and whatnot.

[Andrew Santino]

You're a forger. Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Forager. What would you be in that?

[Andrew Santino]

Well, you know, I'd be carrying some sort of weapon. I'd be defending the community.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, yeah, sure, sure.

[Andrew Santino]

I'd be a brute.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, you'd be a brute.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'd be a brute.

[Andrew Santino]

No, buddy, buddy, buddy, buddy. No, dude, you'd be my companion.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'd be a brute.

[Andrew Santino]

Someone's got to see over the trees.

[Bobby Lee]

No, you're like Samwise Gamgee, the emotional support.

[Andrew Santino]

Yes. No, no, no. You are. You're a physical man. Okay, how about this? You and I would be a team. Just say that. Be a team. And how about the this. We'd be a team. You're getting crazy, goblin. And I'm focused on the mission. And that's the character dynamic.

[Stavros Halkias]

That is true. That is.

[Andrew Santino]

And I'm like, stop. We have to go.

[Stavros Halkias]

And you're like, just let me hit one second.

[Andrew Santino]

Let me hit this real quick.

[Stavros Halkias]

And I'm like, bobby, can you. Can you make. Can you mix me up an elixir that cures herpes?

[Bobby Lee]

Here you go. Yeah, I already took it. And then I would. Then I would say. Can I go with you guys?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Bobby Lee]

Hey, guys.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, maybe not on this run. No, no, no.

[Stavros Halkias]

The.

[Bobby Lee]

I've never seen a dragon before, and I. I guess I know you guys are going to go hunt that dragon.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, and that's awesome. And we're gonna next time for sure. Actually, we're not even going to see any drag.

[Andrew Santino]

We' this journey. No way.

[Bobby Lee]

Why are you going to Mount. Mount Lonely? Well, that's where the dragon is.

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, there's a.

[Stavros Halkias]

We're going by there.

[Andrew Santino]

Near it.

[Bobby Lee]

I see.

[Stavros Halkias]

I did not stop.

[Bobby Lee]

But then where would you go? Are you going to Carlsbad? We.

[Andrew Santino]

We. We've got.

[Bobby Lee]

Or Bakersfield? Where? I mean, where you going?

[Andrew Santino]

You know. Do you know about the Sand People?

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, no, we're. Oh, yeah. But. Okay, so you wouldn't invite me to the.

[Andrew Santino]

No, we would.

[Stavros Halkias]

Of course.

[Andrew Santino]

It would just depend on the mission.

[Bobby Lee]

So let me throw you some things. Damsel in distress. What? I get to go?

[Andrew Santino]

No, that's nuts.

[Stavros Halkias]

I say we bring him.

[Andrew Santino]

What for?

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. How many damsels are there?

[Stavros Halkias]

Although you. Can I be honest? Your attitude today.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, you're not getting invited to Damsel on the street.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, interesting.

[Stavros Halkias]

I don't know.

[Bobby Lee]

Oh, interesting.

[Stavros Halkias]

When we're podcasting, this is fine. But we're in the woods. There's orcs descending on us. I can't have a little freak out.

[Andrew Santino]

You know what I mean?

[Stavros Halkias]

Because we offended you. You need the eye on the prize. I don't need to worry. Is he actually going to give me the. The cure?

[Bobby Lee]

See, here's the Orcavros. Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Is he mad at me?

[Bobby Lee]

I wouldn't be mad because you actually invited me right into your movie. Right. It's when you don't invite me. Yeah. Is when I get mad. Do you see how that works? Face? Yeah. You understand how that works, Face. So if you invite me, I'm jolly. Because I like to feel included. You face. No, I'm sorry. My bad.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's all right.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm so sorry. You're right.

[Andrew Santino]

We would take you on a mission.

[Bobby Lee]

My bad.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's right.

[Bobby Lee]

I'm aggressive.

[Stavros Halkias]

I wish. What would be awesome is I wish I could go back in time and just, like, send an email to you that you definitely would have just missed. Wouldn't have read.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. You could prove it. Like, I sent you an email and I'm like, oh, my bad. Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, I would love to have. You wouldn't have known.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You told him. We talked about it.

[Stavros Halkias]

I should have said. Actually, we did. Dude, what are you talking about? You're supposed to be the second lead.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You bailed.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, I bailed.

[Stavros Halkias]

I had to rewrite the whole movie.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

It was that the guy was Korean anymore. Really?

[Bobby Lee]

I probably wouldn't have done it in the first place.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, I know.

[Bobby Lee]

You know that, right? I do. Yeah. First place.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's what's frustrating about this. But I know you would have turned me down.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. Yeah. I wouldn't have read it immediate now.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, everybody at home needs to go watch.

[Bobby Lee]

Watch it, because I read a couple of reviews. I'm lying.

[Andrew Santino]

Go on Rotten Tomatoes.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, Good guy. Go check it out.

[Andrew Santino]

And also get the calendar.

[Bobby Lee]

Please get the.

[Stavros Halkias]

Please buy tickets. I'm going on a huge tour.

[Andrew Santino]

What is it? Where's the calendar at?

[Stavros Halkias]

Stavi biz s. Vvy.

[Andrew Santino]

Let's start a cult. 82%. That is huge.

[Bobby Lee]

That's insane.

[Stavros Halkias]

Not enough to. Not enough real guys reviewed it. Reviewed it? To get on the Tomorrow.

[Andrew Santino]

What do you mean? Not yet, but it will be.

[Stavros Halkias]

We'll get there.

[Bobby Lee]

How many reviews do you need?

[Stavros Halkias]

I don't know.

[Andrew Santino]

I think it's 100. Isn't that right? It's something like that.

[Bobby Lee]

All right, now go to Borderlands, see what I got. What did that get?

[Andrew Santino]

I think it's still at, like, 15 or 20.

[Stavros Halkias]

10%.

[Andrew Santino]

10%. Oh, man.

[Stavros Halkias]

Okay.

[Bobby Lee]

It's bad.

[Andrew Santino]

It's not bad. I got. I got a couple of those. It's fine. It is what it is.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah. The Kevin Hart game one. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Me time. That's probably.

[Bobby Lee]

What's that? Me time. What's me time?

[Andrew Santino]

Me time's got to be at 5%. Maybe. Maybe four and a half. Seven.

[Bobby Lee]

Seven.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Tough.

[Stavros Halkias]

These movies are fascinating because it's like, those guys are so famous and they're. They're the fakest movies of all time. Disrespect. It's like they almost feel like movies from 30 Rock making a joke about a shitty movie that Kevin Hart was in. And it's like. And they're both so famous and talented. It's like, how did this happen? But I guess they're getting the bag from Netflix.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, because it just doesn't matter. It's just. They pump these things out. Like, that's the thing. They just pump them out. But, you know, they're not pumping out. Let's start a cult. They're not pumping out stuff like that. Go watch.

[Bobby Lee]

But guys like us, though, right? We're in movies like this. They're fine. Because they're like, oh, I got nine movies I'm about to do.

[Andrew Santino]

And they just got.

[Bobby Lee]

Him and I are going like, okay, I guess this is it.

[Andrew Santino]

This is what we get.

[Bobby Lee]

Yeah, this is what we got. But this year. You know what I mean? It sucks.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, well, go watch. Let's start a cult. Go see Stavi Baby on tour.

[Bobby Lee]

Dude, you know, I love the.

[Stavros Halkias]

Thank you.

[Bobby Lee]

Dude, you know I love you. I appreciate.

[Stavros Halkias]

I love you.

[Andrew Santino]

Let's go have dinner.

[Bobby Lee]

What a fun. Have dinner tonight. Let's go. All right. Thank you for being a bad friend.

[Andrew Santino]

Thank you.

[Bobby Lee]

Who?