Theo Von Joins Bad Friends Today on Patreon

Summary

Bad Friends Podcast: Theo Von Joins Bad Friends Today on Patreon

Hosts: Bobby Lee & Andrew Santino
Special Guest: Theo Von
Date: February 27, 2026

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Episode Overview

In this lively Patreon-exclusive episode, Bobby Lee and Andrew Santino are joined by comedian Theo Von. The trio dives into their signature mix of absurd humor, wild anecdotes, and candid conversations, covering everything from infamous jailbirds like the "Tiger King" to accidental run-ins with the law, with Theo bringing his unique Southern flavor into the mix. The episode is rich with improvisational riffs, quick-fire banter, and laugh-out-loud moments that embody the "Bad Friends" dynamic fans love.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

The Tiger King DM and Prison Shenanigans

• [00:29] Bobby reveals he received a DM from the Tiger King, surprising Andrew and Theo.
• [00:31] Andrew (C): "Isn't he in prison?"
• The group quickly jokes about the Tiger King’s crimes in their typical irreverent style.
• [00:34] Andrew: "So we got hit up by the Tiger King as well. What do you go to prison for? Killing people?"
• [00:40] Bobby: “I think... petting against the fur. You know, sometimes if you pet a cat—”
• The crew riffs on the notion of "petting" animals the wrong way leading to criminal charges.
• [00:57] Andrew (reads the real charges): “Two counts of murder for hire, eight counts of violating the Lacey Act and nine counts of violating the Endangered Species Act.”
• They cap the bit with Bobby joking, “And one count of petting the wrong way,” making light of the situation.

Life's Bizarre Turns & Dark Humor

• [01:01] Andrew: "21 years, 252 months. It’s like petting against the grain."
• Conversation turns to a story about a drunk driver going the wrong way on the interstate.
• [01:06] Andrew: "You see that guy who was, like, drunk driving up the interstate. You’re like, what are you doing, man?"
• [01:14] Andrew shares a grim but oddly comical story: "I knew his girlfriend was driving to work in the morning and got hit by a guy going the other way. Just driving in the morning, drunk on the other way. Just smoked her. Wah, wah, wah."
  • Bobby interjects, deadpan: "She’s alive?"
  • Andrew: "Yeah. I don't know anymore. I mean, this was a while ago."

Wild Personal Confessions

• [01:27] Bobby (to everyone’s shock): "I ran over a motorcyclist."
  • Andrew: "You did?"
  • Bobby: "Yeah. Remember—"
  • Andrew (jokingly): "Where? In Pyongyang?"

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On the Tiger King in prison:

  • Bobby: “You know, sometimes if you pet a cat... if you pet back to front. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They don't like it. No. Yeah, it hurts, apparently.” [00:40]
  • Andrew (deadpan): "Two counts of murder for hire... and one count of petting the wrong way. Damn, dude." [00:57]

• On absurd sentencing:

  • Andrew: "21 years, 252 months. It’s like petting against the grain." [01:01]

• Unexpected dark humor:

  • Andrew: "I knew his girlfriend was driving to work in the morning and got hit by a guy going the other way... Wah, wah, wah." [01:14]
  • Bobby: "She’s alive?" [01:25]

• Wild personal admission:

  • Bobby: "I ran over a motorcyclist.” [01:27]
  • Andrew (immediately): “Where? In Pyongyang?” [01:30]

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• [00:29] — Bobby reveals DMs from Tiger King
• [00:40] — Tiger King joke sequence about "petting against the fur"
• [00:57] — Reading out actual Tiger King charges
• [01:06] — Drunk driving anecdotes
• [01:27] — Bobby’s shocking admission of running over a motorcyclist

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Episode Style & Tone

• The tone is loose, irreverent, and darkly funny—classic Bad Friends.
• There’s a strong focus on improvisational humor, satire, and playful jabs.
• The dynamic between Bobby, Andrew, and Theo is fast-paced, unfiltered, and consistently entertaining.
• Quotes and anecdotes bounce rapidly between the hosts, creating an engaging group energy.

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Summary for New Listeners:
This episode is a quintessential Bad Friends romp, with Bobby, Andrew, and Theo riffing on news, personal stories, and the absurdities of celebrity life and legal trouble. The humor is unrestrained, occasionally dark, but always charismatic and deeply funny—making it a must-listen for fans of raw, comedic storytelling.

Transcript

[A]

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[B]

DM from Tiger King.

[C]

Isn't he in prison?

[B]

Yeah. He hit us up, too. He wants to talk.

[C]

Oh, he hit us up. So we got hit up by the Tiger King as well. What do you go to prison for? Killing people. Did he kill somebody?

[B]

I think. I think petting against the fur. You know, sometimes if you pet a cat. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. If you pet back to front. Yeah, yeah,

[C]

yeah,

[B]

yeah.

[C]

They

[B]

don't

[C]

like it. No. Yeah, it hurts, apparently. Two counts of murder for hire, eight counts of violating the Lacey act and nine counts of violating the Endangered Species Act. Okay.

[B]

A little different.

[C]

Yeah. Yeah.

[B]

Yep. And one count of petting

[C]

the wrong. Petting the wrong way. Damn, dude. 21 years, 252 months. It's like petting against the grain. It's like when you see that guy who was, like, drunk driving up the interstate. You're like, what are you. What are you doing, man? You. What are you doing on the interstate? I saw a buddy of mine, I knew his girlfriend was driving to work in the morning and got hit by a guy going the other way. Just driving in the morning, drunk on the other way. Just smoked her. Wah, wah, wah. She's alive?

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

I don't know anymore. I mean, this was a while ago.

[B]

I ran over a motorcyclist. You did? Yeah. Remember

[C]

where in Pyongyang?