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Bobby Lee
The new Apple Watch Series 10 is here. It has the biggest display ever. It's also the thinnest Apple watch ever, making it even more comfortable on your wrist. And it's the fastest charging Apple watch, getting you 8 hours of charge in just 15 minutes. Introducing the all new Apple Watch Series 10. Now available for the first time in glossy jet black aluminum compared to previous generation. IPhone Xs are later required. Charge time and actual results will vary.
Andrew Santino
Hello, Andres. I'm here. Andres. Hello to Andrew Carlos McCall.
Bobby Lee
Little pics, little pigs. Let me not by the hair on my chinny chin chin. Then I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll blow your house in.
Andrew Santino
Here's fancy.
Bobby Lee
Oh, Rudy.
Andrew Santino
I just wanted to let you know.
Bobby Lee
That we're live streaming October 24th at 6pm on momin.com bad friends. It's gonna be awesome, guys.
Tim Dillon
Hey, everybody.
Bobby Lee
We're doing a Bad Friends live show. It's called Scary Times usa.
Tim Dillon
Scary Time usa.
Rudy
And how do you.
Tim Dillon
How do you watch it? Go to Moment Co Bad friends. It's Thursday, October 24th at 6pm we're gonna have exclusive merch available for it. So Bad friends. Scary Time USA, dude.
Bobby Lee
America, dude. Yeah.
Tim Dillon
Live Stream 24.
Bobby Lee
That's 6pm PST.
Tim Dillon
We're live streaming it, so join us. Moment Co Bad Friends. We'll also be hosting an interactive VIP afterparty after the show and active Patreon members can join the VIP afterparty for free.
Bobby Lee
Scary Times usa.
Andrew Santino
You two are Bad Friends. Who are these two idiots? White dude and an Asian dude.
Bobby Lee
You two are disgusting.
Andrew Santino
You two or something. We're bad friends.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. Oh, see, in. In Japan, Wide eyes is scary. Have you not look at that? That's horror. They can't even come to America. They get petrified.
Tim Dillon
They're scared of us.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. Yeah. If they go to Ohio, dude, they freak out. Oh, everybody's so scary.
Tim Dillon
That's so funny.
Bobby Lee
We got a little boy, dude.
Tim Dillon
A Japanese guy has nightmares of just being in like, Canton, Ohio.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
He wakes up downtown, he's like, oh, no, no.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. State fair. I don't like a state fair.
Tim Dillon
So much accord.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
So much of corn.
Bobby Lee
What was that? Italian?
Tim Dillon
So much according. So much accord.
Bobby Lee
So much of corn. And don't even get me.
Tim Dillon
Oh, no.
Bobby Lee
I'm telling you right now. Don't even give me stuff right now. Hey, forget about it.
Tim Dillon
Oh, no. Yeah, dude, he's back.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, he's back. I know. You know what? It's. It's astonishing to me how fat I've gotten.
Tim Dillon
You're not fat, dude.
Bobby Lee
The last couple of podcasts, everybody's talking about how fat I am.
Tim Dillon
Yeah, you're fat. I know, but not bad fat.
Bobby Lee
It's pretty bad.
Tim Dillon
No, no, it's fun fat. You're fun fat. There is a level of bad fat. There is like a line of when you're. When you're fat. Fat.
Bobby Lee
Well, I've had dates on. Like, I've gone to the beach with dates. I mean, and when I take my shirt off, there is, like, that kind of, like, hesitation.
Tim Dillon
That is a bad date spot. Why are you going to the beach?
Bobby Lee
What do you mean?
Tim Dillon
The beach is such a bad date spot. Sand.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I do picnics.
Tim Dillon
Do it in a park.
Bobby Lee
Okay. That's right.
Tim Dillon
Go down to Echo Park.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, I bring boba. I bring it all. Buns.
Tim Dillon
Boba buns.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, I bring it up.
Tim Dillon
But tell me for real, how do you wash your laundry? On hot or on tap? What temperature? Warm.
Bobby Lee
I honestly don't know how any of it works. I just press regular and that's all I know about it. And then sometimes I don't even know how to, like my dryer. I don't even how to do extension of the time.
Tim Dillon
Do you dry everything?
Bobby Lee
Yeah. Yeah.
Andrew Santino
Well.
Bobby Lee
Well, my blankets are so large that I have to hang them afterwards.
Tim Dillon
I hang dry, you hang dry. I feel like because you're supposed to. It shrinks.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. I have so many blankets. I really do.
Tim Dillon
You're a little blanket boy.
Bobby Lee
I just have a lot of blankets, but I get them at parachute.
Tim Dillon
What. What is that?
Bobby Lee
To jump from a plane? No, no, it's a.
Tim Dillon
Some sort of fancy.
Bobby Lee
It's fancy blankets and sheets.
Tim Dillon
Free waffle cut and throw.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. Yeah. Look at that.
Tim Dillon
How much is it? They're expensive.
Bobby Lee
Air, warm water. I don't get the bat. Those are bathrobes. Go to the blankets.
Tim Dillon
What's the point of a bathrobe?
Bobby Lee
Yeah, I don't know what it is.
Tim Dillon
What's the point? You can wrap in a towel, and then you walk around in the towel until you're dry. And then you put on some underwear. Yeah, I guess if you're old and you're cold a lot.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, they're pretty reasonable. 329.
Tim Dillon
Yeah. That doesn't seem crazy. I don't even know. Probably seems like I've got the Jenna Jameson collection from Target.
Bobby Lee
Oh, that's nice.
Tim Dillon
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
Is it good?
Tim Dillon
Nothing sticks to those sheets or stars. Can't stain them.
Bobby Lee
It's good. It's good.
Tim Dillon
Cannot stain Them, Dude.
Bobby Lee
So Dave Navarro texted me the other day.
Tim Dillon
What? That's rad, right?
Bobby Lee
No, but it's because you know what happened, right?
Tim Dillon
What happened with him?
Bobby Lee
Perry Farrell.
Tim Dillon
Oh, I saw Perry. Like, what did he, like? He, like, pushed him on stage. He got into a fight. So Dave Navarro, after getting into a fight, text you?
Bobby Lee
Yeah, but I don't know if it was for me, so check this out. Oh, no, I'm being real. Check this out.
Tim Dillon
What'd he say?
Bobby Lee
He goes, whoa. So he texted me, come in here.
Tim Dillon
Come in here. Come here and sit down. Set him up in the blue chair.
Bobby Lee
Sit down.
Tim Dillon
Where would I sit in the blue chair?
Bobby Lee
In the blue chair.
Tim Dillon
Ladies and gentlemen, Tim Dill.
Andrew Santino
Tim, the infamous self on this chair. I swear to God, if. What happens if I injure myself in this chair?
Bobby Lee
Why? Okay.
Andrew Santino
Which is a very big possibility.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
That's a you problem.
Bobby Lee
You're going to be fine.
Tim Dillon
Well, we're talking about. We're talking about Dave Navaro getting so.
Bobby Lee
Dave. Remember Dave Navaro? Yeah. What happened to him with Perry? Frell. On stage.
Tim Dillon
Have you seen this clip?
Andrew Santino
Jane's Addiction.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Tim Dillon
Look at. He pushed him. This. This was like a week ago.
Bobby Lee
This is a week ago.
Tim Dillon
He looks like he's juiced up. Look at this. He's pissed off.
Bobby Lee
Pissed off. Look at him stomping around when Perry's like that. You got to. You got to back away.
Tim Dillon
Yeah, he looks amped.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
He's angry.
Bobby Lee
Like, he's like.
Andrew Santino
Jane says, look at.
Bobby Lee
Jane says, right. Look at him.
Tim Dillon
And then he starts to attack.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. Coming down the mountain. Really good.
Tim Dillon
Oh, he's just trying to amp him up. Let's go. Play your licks. He goes, what. What are you doing?
Andrew Santino
Whoa.
Bobby Lee
What is going on there? Dude, Weird.
Tim Dillon
All right, so then. Okay, anyway, Dave Navarro text you after.
Bobby Lee
Days later. So Thursday.
Tim Dillon
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
He goes, did you. He goes, did you just wake up from a dream I was in?
Tim Dillon
Whoa. Did you?
Bobby Lee
Yeah, ironically. Yes.
Tim Dillon
Wow.
Bobby Lee
So this. And then. Because it's obviously for a girl, right? So then I go, what? I've been dreaming about you for years.
Tim Dillon
Good. Play the girl thing. Good.
Bobby Lee
Are you okay from that stage incident? And nothing.
Tim Dillon
Yeah, that makes sense.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. So it was a girl that he was trying to tag named Bobby.
Tim Dillon
B O, B, B, I. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Andrew Santino
But she. She might have also cared about how he was.
Tim Dillon
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
What do you mean?
Andrew Santino
Well, I mean, she could have asked that.
Bobby Lee
Oh, yeah, she could have.
Andrew Santino
Absolutely.
Bobby Lee
But why didn't he respond?
Tim Dillon
Because he didn't get the Answer he wanted.
Andrew Santino
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
What's. Oh. Should I do another answer?
Tim Dillon
Absolutely not.
Bobby Lee
Okay.
Tim Dillon
That's the way to get a number block.
Bobby Lee
All right?
Tim Dillon
You do one more, you're gonna come up green. Oh, really?
Bobby Lee
Okay.
Andrew Santino
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
Ladies and gentlemen, Tim, the guest of.
Bobby Lee
We've never potted together.
Tim Dillon
Tim Dylan.
Andrew Santino
Never ever. No, she's really allowed to stay because.
Bobby Lee
He, you know, he canceled the Tiger Belly three times.
Andrew Santino
You've canceled the meme multiple times.
Bobby Lee
No, that's not the insane you've canceled.
Andrew Santino
That's Bobby, you canceled.
Bobby Lee
That's insane that you would even say that.
Tim Dillon
We've both. Tim, Tim, Tim, Everybody knows Bobby never cancels.
Bobby Lee
Okay? Also, Tim, this too.
Andrew Santino
I've canceled more.
Bobby Lee
You canceled first.
Andrew Santino
I canceled first and I've canceled more. You have canceled that. Okay, I'm more wrong.
Bobby Lee
Okay, but you know the game tag where you tag and then you run away? Right? I didn't start the game tag.
Andrew Santino
I.
Bobby Lee
You did.
Andrew Santino
I fully take responsibility for canceling.
Bobby Lee
Okay. And then let me ask you this. I don't.
Andrew Santino
But I believe if I had not canceled first.
Tim Dillon
True.
Andrew Santino
You would have canceled.
Tim Dillon
That's correct.
Andrew Santino
That's what you believe is my belief.
Bobby Lee
Okay.
Andrew Santino
It's my belief.
Bobby Lee
It's a belief system. Yeah.
Tim Dillon
You are the cancel king. You. You cancel.
Andrew Santino
But we both can't. By the way, the funniest thing ever is when me and Bobby are both on a lineup and neither one of.
Tim Dillon
Us goes all the time. Happens all the time.
Andrew Santino
That is very funny.
Tim Dillon
I get a call from the producer going, I had Tim and Bobby cancel. Are you around?
Bobby Lee
Oh, yeah. We never show up. A lot of times we don't.
Andrew Santino
Stuff happens.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, well, sometimes I call you. Well, sometimes. One time I called you, and I go, are you going? And you go, I'm not going. I'm not going either. Yeah, that one time.
Tim Dillon
You both do that a lot to.
Andrew Santino
The one time I sent him a COVID test.
Bobby Lee
A fake.
Andrew Santino
I sent him a photo of a Covid of the COVID By the way, years after Covid years, people had. The young kids didn't even know what it was. I was sending him a picture of.
Bobby Lee
The COVID lines, but he didn't send the promoter that test, but I did.
Andrew Santino
So he got yours.
Bobby Lee
He said that I had Covid to the guy. Right. But then I actually sent him the test that he gave me to him.
Tim Dillon
Right, Right.
Bobby Lee
Saying that I have it. Right. So he. It makes him look like he didn't have it.
Tim Dillon
Correct. Yeah.
Andrew Santino
Right.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
Good move, Bob.
Andrew Santino
I mean, you know.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
But the thing is, Me and Bobby will lie and then get found out. And then we don't care that much.
Tim Dillon
Well, it doesn't matter.
Bobby Lee
We don't care.
Andrew Santino
We don't really care.
Tim Dillon
You know, no one's going to get that mad. That's the. It doesn't matter.
Andrew Santino
We're being used. That's right.
Tim Dillon
We are.
Bobby Lee
It feels like we're being used. It's like some guy that I never said hi to me before.
Tim Dillon
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
Is now. Hey, can you do my show? Yeah. You'll put me on the flyer.
Tim Dillon
Right?
Andrew Santino
Right.
Bobby Lee
That's why.
Tim Dillon
And they'll use your name to sell tickets.
Bobby Lee
Right. So then I don't show up.
Tim Dillon
Right.
Andrew Santino
I don't like being one promoter, and I'm not going to say who.
Bobby Lee
Can I guess?
Andrew Santino
You can guess after I've said this.
Bobby Lee
Okay.
Andrew Santino
One promoter literally said, I can't pay anyone tonight because my father has Alzheimer's. I swear to God. And then that person said, that was the way. And I was like, okay. I guess I.
Tim Dillon
God damn.
Bobby Lee
Well, ye. Yeah. Have you cancel? You cancel?
Tim Dillon
I, I, there's times I have to cancel.
Bobby Lee
Why?
Tim Dillon
If I'm just like, if I just can't make it, if we're doing too many pods and all this, it's like there's. I'm never going to make it. You'll cancel because you're tired.
Bobby Lee
How true. Yeah.
Andrew Santino
Every now and then Emily at the store will call me. She'll go, are you close? And I'm at Nobu Malibu, and I have a tuna roll in my mouth. You're that far?
Bobby Lee
You're that far. I go, oh, yeah. Yeah.
Tim Dillon
I'm right down Sunset.
Andrew Santino
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
You're the most nightmarish person to follow.
Andrew Santino
That's not true.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. 100%.
Andrew Santino
It's very nice of you. I've heard you say this before and I really appreciate.
Bobby Lee
I've texted Emily that.
Andrew Santino
That's very nice, but I feel that way about you. I hate going up after you when.
Bobby Lee
You'Re on, dude, it's unfollowable.
Andrew Santino
Well, that's, that's when you're off.
Bobby Lee
I like it. But when you're on, dude, oh, my God.
Andrew Santino
When I'm off, I'm off. But if I'm on, it's good.
Bobby Lee
But you're funnier when you're off because.
Andrew Santino
You get angry, by the way. I agree with you. Yeah, I agree with you. But I love, I love you. I feel like we have a similarity.
Bobby Lee
In that sense, just energy wise. Yes.
Tim Dillon
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
Because sometimes we don't want to do It.
Bobby Lee
What's going on?
Tim Dillon
No, I'm listening.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
I do enjoy it.
Andrew Santino
Sometimes we don't want to do it and we have shorts or sweatpants on stage and we're angry that you're angry.
Bobby Lee
I know.
Andrew Santino
And that's the best time.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
You're moody, girls. You're both a moody little girl.
Bobby Lee
Also. He also contemplates things afterwards sometimes.
Andrew Santino
Yes.
Bobby Lee
So he'll go, maybe I should open my own club. Remember that one time?
Andrew Santino
Yes. Guys. That's what you call him. Having my mental illness.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, Yeah.
Andrew Santino
A full mental break, you know, because.
Bobby Lee
He was trying new stuff and, you know, I mean, it was. You know, I. I get you. The main room can be packed.
Andrew Santino
Just wasn't working.
Bobby Lee
There's a pressure.
Tim Dillon
Sure.
Bobby Lee
Right.
Tim Dillon
And so Tim's the only comic that's tri. Coastal. Tim moved. Tim moved to fucking. Tim moved to Austin for seven minutes. Came back. Moved back to New York. Came back, Went back to New York, bought a house again in New York. Bought a house here, sold a house in Austin. Right.
Bobby Lee
You had a Hamptons thing, right?
Tim Dillon
Yeah. Got one out there still.
Bobby Lee
Still.
Andrew Santino
Well, we're opening the Mothership Hamptons, which is coming up, and it's very.
Tim Dillon
Gotta get out there.
Andrew Santino
I'm trying to get Joe to do Mothership Vegas.
Tim Dillon
That would make sense.
Andrew Santino
Wouldn't we be all happy?
Bobby Lee
That'd be great.
Andrew Santino
That's correct.
Bobby Lee
Mothership great. Vegas would be great.
Tim Dillon
I'll move there.
Bobby Lee
There's really no club where we can go, is there, in Vegas? I mean, there's millions of clubs. Right. But it's like where I'm gonna feel like I want to go there twice or three times a year. You know, Playboy. There's Playboy Comedy. There used to be this thing called Playboy Comedy. And you'd want to go because it was a simple gig. Sometimes it's just one show a night. It was Friday. Saturday.
Tim Dillon
Steve Burn was doing.
Bobby Lee
No, it was Ahmed. Ahmed.
Tim Dillon
Oh, yeah.
Bobby Lee
And what's that little. His partner. What's his. J.J. jay Davis. Jay Davis.
Tim Dillon
Jay Davis used to have it. Yeah, I knew. I heard about this. I never was privy to this Playboy comedy room in Vegas. But it closed down, right?
Bobby Lee
Yeah, it was at the Palms. It was the best.
Tim Dillon
Anyway, now there's no. There's a bunch of clubs out there, but you're going to go and you're probably going to dip into a theater is the problem. No, you'd want to play a club there.
Bobby Lee
You guys are theater guys. I'm a club guy.
Tim Dillon
Yeah, right. You're a Fucking theater.
Bobby Lee
What are you, theater guy or club guy?
Andrew Santino
I like them both.
Bobby Lee
Okay.
Tim Dillon
Just depends on, you know.
Andrew Santino
I like them both.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. What's up with your nose right now, dude?
Andrew Santino
I don't know. It's like I had like a thing. I'm having like a thing.
Tim Dillon
What do you mean?
Andrew Santino
Like, make allergic reactions.
Bobby Lee
Nose, dude.
Andrew Santino
I don't know.
Bobby Lee
Real.
Andrew Santino
No, I know. It's like a red. I've had like an allergic reaction to something.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
I don't know what it is.
Tim Dillon
You know, to change your face wash, Tim.
Andrew Santino
I know.
Tim Dillon
I've been telling you that for years.
Bobby Lee
What's that? The glasses? The nose thing you get at novelty shops.
Tim Dillon
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
Modern version of that.
Andrew Santino
I know it's crazy. I don't know what it is. I, I, I, I was on a medication and I had a reaction to it. Like antibiotics.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Keep them on. Keep them on.
Andrew Santino
See? Yeah, that's why, that's why I'm wearing.
Tim Dillon
Them better with them on.
Andrew Santino
Yeah, that's why I'm wearing them.
Bobby Lee
So are you in town for a while? I love. First of all, you have the best parties.
Andrew Santino
The parties are decent. Yeah.
Tim Dillon
Unbelievable.
Bobby Lee
You go to those parties?
Andrew Santino
Yeah, of course.
Tim Dillon
Yeah, they're the best.
Bobby Lee
Your parties are the best.
Tim Dillon
Why go to the parties? You're there for five seconds when you leave.
Bobby Lee
I know, but I love just coming in and out.
Andrew Santino
But my godson met you and he's Chinese and, and loved you. It was a big.
Bobby Lee
Oh, that's what we were. Got some. Was the Chinese kid.
Tim Dillon
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
Wow.
Andrew Santino
The little Chinese baby.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah. It was a beautiful.
Tim Dillon
That is the funniest part about Tim's parties. You'll see a tick tock star and a little Chinese baby.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
All in the living room together.
Bobby Lee
Caitlyn Jenner for no reason.
Tim Dillon
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Bobby Lee
How do you know her?
Andrew Santino
You know, we're both patriots. We love the country.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Andrew Santino
We love America.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah.
Andrew Santino
I like her. I. Fascinated by things. She's got an amazing American life.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah, she does. Yeah.
Tim Dillon
Amazing American life.
Andrew Santino
There's very few countries you can do what she did. Think about it.
Bobby Lee
Well, explain it to us. Well, let's say, let's say we're from a European nation.
Tim Dillon
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
All right.
Andrew Santino
Yeah, let's.
Bobby Lee
What Cyprus is that one?
Tim Dillon
It's probably more likely that we're from an Eastern European country.
Bobby Lee
We're from an eastern, like maybe like on the border of Russia and China. So we kind of look, you know, me, Asian, maybe. And some people look white.
Andrew Santino
It's very difficult to Be born a guy, become an Olympian, become the spokesman for Wheaties. Marry a woman whose husband defended another athlete who murdered his wife.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
Then have a bunch of stepdaughters. One of them does a sex tape. They all become billionaires, the most famous people in the world. You then decide that actually you were a woman this entire time.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
You get surgery to become a woman and then decide that the only way to save America is to elect Donald Trump.
Bobby Lee
Wow, that's a pretty American story.
Andrew Santino
American life.
Tim Dillon
And become a female of the year on Vanity Fair.
Andrew Santino
Yeah, that's right.
Tim Dillon
And then also kill someone somewhere in between.
Andrew Santino
And then kill a woman in Malibu with your truck.
Tim Dillon
Right.
Bobby Lee
Did you really do that?
Tim Dillon
Yeah, yeah. She killed a lady.
Bobby Lee
Real though.
Andrew Santino
Unintentionally.
Bobby Lee
Unintentionally.
Tim Dillon
An accident. There it is.
Andrew Santino
There it is.
Bobby Lee
And when was that?
Tim Dillon
In Malibu a couple years ago. I mean. Right. And it was mid transition. Right?
Andrew Santino
That's right. She was 2015.
Tim Dillon
I'll tell you what, that sped up the transition.
Andrew Santino
She was unfocused.
Tim Dillon
You got to finish. You got to finish the job at that point.
Andrew Santino
She was unfocused.
Tim Dillon
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. Didn't Brandy. To kill somebody, too. Yeah.
Tim Dillon
Brandy Singer in the car accident.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. And then she kind of disappeared after.
Tim Dillon
That because she didn't transition.
Bobby Lee
Oh, is that what it is?
Andrew Santino
You get one. Yeah, I think you get one car accident. If there's a certain level of fame, you get to kill one person in a car.
Tim Dillon
Yeah, that is true.
Andrew Santino
True.
Bobby Lee
Well, let's go through the. Another guy. Would you know anybody I know that's.
Tim Dillon
Killed someone in a car?
Bobby Lee
A celebrity?
Tim Dillon
No. Well, yes, I do.
Bobby Lee
What?
Tim Dillon
Yes, I do. Ferris Bueller.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, that's who I was thinking.
Tim Dillon
Yeah. He came with Molly Ringwald.
Bobby Lee
Right. In England.
Tim Dillon
In England when they were like 17.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. Yeah.
Tim Dillon
And then.
Andrew Santino
And then Laura Bush, George W. Bush's wife.
Bobby Lee
Wow.
Tim Dillon
Really?
Andrew Santino
Someone in a car.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
Another Bush.
Bobby Lee
Ted Kennedy.
Tim Dillon
Ted. Ken Kennedy.
Andrew Santino
Killed someone.
Bobby Lee
Killed somebody.
Tim Dillon
How about this? Another Bush. Different family. The Anheuser Busch son. Augie Busch maybe killed a guy in college. Dui.
Bobby Lee
And then Sonny Bono got killed by a tree.
Tim Dillon
That's right.
Andrew Santino
That's right.
Bobby Lee
You remember that.
Andrew Santino
If my. If I was killed by like a really rich person. Let me tell you how easy it would have been to get my parents to not press charges. Let me explain how easy that would have been. It would have been a five minute conversation. Okay.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
They would have sent, like, not even their top people. They would have sent some very low level attorneys. My parents house in Long Island.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
My parents, they would have just said, listen, we can kind of. We can, you know, we can mitigate this. We can mitigate this. We can make it go away. And they would have said, we think you deserve like, $44,000. My mother and father would have lit up. They would have said, can we do 50? And they would have said, absolutely. And they would have given them 50 grand. And my mother and father would have dropped the case 100% immediately.
Bobby Lee
Wow, wow, wow.
Tim Dillon
Especially because you were. You were full. You were such an ass. You were a troublemaker when you were a kid.
Andrew Santino
Well, listen, I'm from them. They were troublemakers. But the problem is, in 1997, 50 G's. It's real money.
Tim Dillon
Real money. Pay off the house.
Andrew Santino
It's real money.
Bobby Lee
My parents were so immigrant, they wouldn't even know the rules.
Andrew Santino
Right.
Bobby Lee
Like, oh, he died. Yeah, he died Good. No, not good. Oh, no. Right. There'd be an oh, no one.
Tim Dillon
Oh, no.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah.
Andrew Santino
That's also what my parents. My parents would have. Also.
Tim Dillon
Asian accents, but they assume it was your fault.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. And even if they offered them money, my parents wouldn't understand. They were like, well, 44, 000. And my dad would be. I don't have.
Tim Dillon
Yeah, right, right.
Bobby Lee
I don't have a portable.
Tim Dillon
They end up making.
Bobby Lee
Right. And they're like, well, then we'll see you later. Okay, bye. And then my dad would feel like he got one. You know, I mean.
Tim Dillon
Yeah, he won.
Bobby Lee
He won one.
Andrew Santino
Oh, we got. We had to pay 44.
Bobby Lee
We didn't have.
Tim Dillon
You know, you're allowed to. Yeah. So a certain level of fame, I guess. Who's at the cusp that got washed away then who's killed someone that never returned, who never made.
Andrew Santino
I don't know.
Tim Dillon
Who never made it back.
Bobby Lee
Just kill or driving.
Tim Dillon
Well, look at. What is this going to do to. What's his name? To who?
Bobby Lee
Alec Baldwin.
Tim Dillon
Alec Baldwin.
Bobby Lee
He's fine. He went to court. He got acquitted.
Tim Dillon
He did.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
I think he was kind of on the back nine anyway.
Tim Dillon
So he's done now?
Andrew Santino
No.
Bobby Lee
Well, yeah, he is.
Andrew Santino
He's probably done.
Bobby Lee
He's done.
Andrew Santino
He's done.
Bobby Lee
No more. No more court.
Tim Dillon
But he's so famous.
Bobby Lee
I know, but he didn't do anything.
Tim Dillon
Yeah. He killed a lady.
Bobby Lee
I know.
Andrew Santino
Shot a woman.
Bobby Lee
I know, But I mean, I get it. You're on set.
Andrew Santino
You're like.
Tim Dillon
You think you know why you're doing this. He's doing this because one day he. This accident could easily happen to him.
Bobby Lee
Oh, really?
Tim Dillon
You fucking around on a set, I could easily see this.
Bobby Lee
I could do with a machete.
Tim Dillon
I think you break all the rules.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
Yeah. Bobby, please be careful with this.
Andrew Santino
The thing about Alec Baldwin is afterwards, it just. What? He didn't. And I like him, and he's a great guy. I did his podcast. I think he didn't seem super remorseful. That was the problem. I think he had to turn on the remorse, like, a little more.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
Like, he. He was kind of, like, agitated by the whole thing.
Tim Dillon
Right.
Andrew Santino
Like, frustrated. Like, he was kind of like, what is this? Yeah, that was his attitude. Like, he shot the woman in the head. And then his attitude was like, what's. Hey, the hell's going on here?
Bobby Lee
That's. On set. You think he did that?
Andrew Santino
That. And publicly. Yeah. They were like, you shot a woman? And he goes. He was like, listen. You know, like, that's. And that was the energy, so.
Bobby Lee
Right, right, right.
Tim Dillon
The interview started with listen. I think he said, listen.
Andrew Santino
No, he did.
Tim Dillon
Like, accidents happen on set.
Andrew Santino
Yeah. And they're. They're putting that woman away. That armorer.
Tim Dillon
Yeah. They. She's going to prison.
Bobby Lee
Good.
Tim Dillon
Yeah, she's going to prison. The woman that supplied the gun.
Bobby Lee
Ah.
Tim Dillon
She goes.
Andrew Santino
Does the movie come out ever?
Tim Dillon
No, no chance.
Bobby Lee
I'm Rust.
Tim Dillon
Huh?
Bobby Lee
They finished the movie.
Tim Dillon
Yeah. But does it come out?
Bobby Lee
It's gonna come out.
Andrew Santino
I hope it comes out.
Tim Dillon
It'll be. Maybe.
Bobby Lee
I just got Rust, too.
Tim Dillon
What?
Bobby Lee
I just got Cassin. Russ, too, so.
Tim Dillon
Really?
Bobby Lee
Yeah. Yeah, it's got to come out.
Andrew Santino
You should. You should have makeup artists in that.
Tim Dillon
Yeah, it's coming out in 20, 24 at the end.
Bobby Lee
Whoa. You think it'll do good numbers?
Tim Dillon
Huge.
Bobby Lee
I think I'd watch it.
Andrew Santino
I'll watch it.
Tim Dillon
I definitely want to see the scene. They left it in there, didn't they?
Bobby Lee
Oh, that's the scene.
Tim Dillon
He shoots her in the scene. Right.
Bobby Lee
They should have a little thing.
Andrew Santino
No, no, no, no, no. This. It was obviously.
Tim Dillon
No, no, but they weren't. Wasn't he practicing a scene? He was.
Rudy
He.
Tim Dillon
They were doing it. They were doing.
Andrew Santino
Oh, they gotta leave that scene in.
Tim Dillon
Yeah, that's what I mean.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, you gotta leave that scene.
Andrew Santino
Would they leave him? And I'm like, that's kind of a brilliant marketing, but kind of insensitive.
Bobby Lee
What if they did that?
Tim Dillon
Sensitive. They're doing a walkthrough of a scene, by the way.
Andrew Santino
Please, God, please do. If. When. When this gets released. Please, in very poor taste, do at the end, in memoriam and Then her face.
Bobby Lee
Please do.
Andrew Santino
A very poor taste. Just to prove that Hollywood is still Hollywood.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
Right at the end, do in memoriam and then go. Don't even say her name. What, what did she do again? What was she? She was a cinematographer.
Tim Dillon
No, she was the dp. Right.
Andrew Santino
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, I saw. So you know Christopher Reeves. There's a new Christopher Reeves documentary coming out and the kids, his kid children made it apparently really good.
Tim Dillon
Their story.
Bobby Lee
But. So there was their story.
Tim Dillon
You're right.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. But there was a. It's like a footage of him at the Academy Awards like a year later and he comes out on the stage and the audience are just, they're trying to be, you know, emotional and go and be supportive. But there's also some people like in a horror. Why, like I saw Brad Pitt kind of go.
Andrew Santino
Because I'll tell you why. Why Brad Pitt's going, I've been on a horse.
Tim Dillon
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
Oh, what if that happened to me?
Bobby Lee
That's it. Yeah. Brad. Like, like, like, like this.
Tim Dillon
That is kind of wild, that picture. Zoom into that photo. That kind of looks like a Madame Tussauds. Are you sure that's real? That looked that seriously looks like a Madame Tussauds. It is.
Bobby Lee
Also put on like football gear or something. I mean because the football gear, you.
Andrew Santino
Want him to come out dressed like.
Bobby Lee
A Dallas cow is the cuz the body, the body is withered.
Tim Dillon
Got it.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. So put on some.
Andrew Santino
I get it. Like baggy, wrap them up, bulk them up like a wrap out.
Bobby Lee
I mean he's just like. You know what I mean?
Tim Dillon
Talk about Bobby Lee the costumer.
Rudy
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Bobby Lee
Zocdoc is a free app and website where you can search and compare highly rated in network doctors near you and instantly book appointments with them online.
Rudy
You can filter for specifically the ones that take your insurance which is great. Located near you and treat exactly what you're looking for. Typical wait time to see a doctor booked on ZocDoc is between 24 to 72 hours. That's it. You, you can even score same day appointments which happens and it's great.
Bobby Lee
Once you find the doctor you want, you can book them immediately. No more waiting awkwardly on hold with a receptionist. And these dogs all have verified reviews from actual real patients. I mean, we do that with food like I do when I go on the road. I like I go what's the best restaurant? I read reviews. Why don't you do that with your health, with your heart, with your lungs, with your sliver of liver. Sliver liver?
Rudy
Go to Zocdoc.com bad friends and download the Zocdoc app today for free.
Bobby Lee
Then find and book a top rated Doctor today. That's Zocdoc.com Z OCDoc.com BadFriends Zocdoc.com Bad Friends Today's episode is sponsored by Acorns. Acorns makes it easy to start automatically saving and investing for you, your kids and your retirement. You don't need a lot of money or expertise to invest with Acorns. In fact, you can get started with just your spare change. Acorns recommends an expert built portfolio that fits you and your money goals, then automatically invest your money for you. Wow.
Rudy
Plus you can earn bonus investments just for buying what you need from brands you love. Small steps today can have a huge impact on your future. From Acorns Mighty oaks do grow.
Tim Dillon
Grow your oak.
Bobby Lee
And now Acorns is putting their money into your future. Open an acorns later IRA and get up to 3% match on new contributions. That's extra money for your retirement.
Rudy
Look, I'm getting older. Everybody knows that. You can see my face and investing for me is important. It doesn't matter how much or how little you have. That is an old wives tale that.
Tim Dillon
You got to be rich before you can invest.
Rudy
That's not true. Starting investing now can help your future and it's a wonderful way to secure a little bit of safety when things don't go the way you want them to go. Because that's life in general. And honestly, I've loved investing and small increments over time from when I started working till now and it's helped me feel a little bit safer about my Future.
Bobby Lee
Head to acorns.com bad friends or download the Acorns app to start saving and investing for your future today. Auto Blow AI Ultra y'all. I brought home an Auto Blow and I haven't left the house in eight days. Okay? Auto Blow AI Ultra is the world's best blowjob machine. Okay? I mean, the old way of doing things, it's over man. The old way of doing it is moving Your arm up and down, over and over again, you know, I mean, as if you're like Von Clap and Jamie, right? But it's boring. Auto Blow AI Ultra not only moves the stroker for you. Oh my God. It does do it for you for sure. But it syncs up with a free included video library with 500 movies synced so that you don't feel like what you. So you can feel like what you do on screen, you know? Basically what I'm trying to say is that the machine does what the screen is doing and it connects and then there's like stuff that happens. Easy with WI fi connection to access free video sync features. It's like your own personal synced pornhub. It even sits with VR videos. Man boy does it. Special free downloadable stroking modes for men with short penises. Not for me. That's not for me. I use the long one special series of sleeves for men with very large penis. That's the one. I used the spec. That's the special series. Go to autoblow.com and use code BAD FRIENDS to save 15 off of any machine. I'm telling you, it's. You're going to get a divorce. Auto Blow AI Ultra, y'all. I brought home an Auto Blow and I haven't left the house in eight days, okay? Auto Blow AI Ultra is the world's best blowjob machine, okay? I mean, the old way of doing things, it's over, man. The old way of doing it is moving your arm up and down over and over again. You know what I mean? As if you're like Von Clap Van Jam, right? But it's boring. Auto Blow AI Ultra not only moves the stroker for you. Oh my God. It does do it for you for sure. But it syncs up with a free included video library with 500 movies synced so that you don't feel like what you. So you can feel like what you do on screen, you know? Basically what I'm trying to say is the machine does what the screen is doing and it connects and then there's like stuff that happens. Easy with WI FI connection to access free video sync features. It's like your own personal synced pornhub. It even sits with VR videos. Man boy does it. Special free downloadable stroking modes for men with short penises. Not for me. That's not for me. I use the long one special series of sleeves for men with very large penis. That's the one. I used the spec. That's the special series. Go to autoblow.com. and use code BAD FRIENDS to save 15 off of any machine. I'm telling you, it's. You're gonna get a divorce. So just.
Andrew Santino
I would.
Bobby Lee
If that was custom. I'm putting some padding. Yeah, I would put some padding in. He's Superman.
Tim Dillon
Bulk him up.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, bulk him up.
Tim Dillon
Well, it would be kind of tight if he did have a Superman shirt underneath the suit. That would have been the crest.
Bobby Lee
Right?
Tim Dillon
That'd be the move. So who. Wait, they're make. So his kids are making a doc about him right now.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
And when does this come out?
Bobby Lee
Soon. Look at the hands. Okay. Anyway.
Andrew Santino
Well, what's he ever unparalyzed?
Bobby Lee
No. What do you mean?
Tim Dillon
Not so super, huh?
Andrew Santino
Like, he did he ever. Did it ever get better?
Bobby Lee
No, it got worse and worse. So sadly, no, it's. It was a.
Tim Dillon
Awful.
Bobby Lee
It's awful. Spinal cord injuries and it was from a horse. Yeah. I don't know why you asked that.
Andrew Santino
Well, no, I. I don't remember it.
Bobby Lee
A horsey did it now. Did the horse.
Tim Dillon
No, I don't think they call it a horsey.
Andrew Santino
No. You ruined someone's ability to walk.
Tim Dillon
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
You think the horsey got in trouble?
Tim Dillon
I think that horse is glue. Now, sadly, that horse is gone.
Andrew Santino
It lives with Whitney Cummings. Whitney has it.
Tim Dillon
Whitney's got it.
Andrew Santino
Whitney would show it to you. She'd go, this is Christopher Reeve stores. This is the horse that killed Christopher Reeve. And they were gonna kill it, but I decided it should come here and watch me do makeup tutorials on Instagram Live.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. Because she has knickknacks.
Andrew Santino
That's right.
Bobby Lee
On the shelves and stuff.
Andrew Santino
Yes.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah. So that's interesting. Yeah, yeah.
Tim Dillon
She would have. She would have the thing that killed an America. That hurt an American here. Yeah, that would be. She would take pride in.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. Like, you know, like the body of Bubbles. Like Michael Jackson's. Right.
Andrew Santino
She definitely has Bubbles stuffed It's monkey in a room.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah.
Tim Dillon
This is. This was Bubbles Pacifier. Do you know that? Born in 1983. This was such a polarizing thing when he would walk around with this monkey.
Bobby Lee
He's from Austin.
Andrew Santino
Bubbles.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. Oh, wow.
Tim Dillon
You can see him at the mothership this weekend on Kill Tony. Bubbles will be there.
Andrew Santino
How long did Bubbles live?
Tim Dillon
Give it up for the great Bubbles, huh?
Andrew Santino
He's alive still.
Tim Dillon
Yeah, you better believe it.
Bobby Lee
He's no, his Bubbles literally still alive. Wow.
Tim Dillon
He's 40 years old.
Bobby Lee
Wow. No, 40.
Tim Dillon
It says 1983. He was born.
Bobby Lee
He's at the center for Great Apes.
Andrew Santino
That was the craziest. Google Bubbles now. Yeah, I knew Google would have.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
Despite the fact that he is very photogenic, Bubbles is difficult to photograph because he does not like the camera. Often will turn his back when he sees a camera.
Andrew Santino
Well, Bubbles knows the camera's the one that causes all the problems.
Tim Dillon
That's exactly right. That's where the pain begins.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. I mean, Bubbles could have gone chimp crazy. Like the documentary.
Tim Dillon
You watched it, you see it? Chimp crazy.
Andrew Santino
I haven't seen it yet.
Tim Dillon
Fantastic.
Bobby Lee
It's fantastic. Yeah.
Andrew Santino
About a chimp who loses it.
Tim Dillon
It's about it. It's about a group of people who are in the chimp industry. Chimp industry. And it focuses what you would think was supposed to be on an original lady, but it ends up being about this woman right here, this lady and her involvement in the. The chimp chimp trade.
Andrew Santino
And what is the chimp industry?
Tim Dillon
Oh, dude.
Bobby Lee
What do you mean? What do you. What do you think it is, Tim?
Andrew Santino
Exotic animals people.
Tim Dillon
Yes.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
In the state of Missouri, there is no exotic animal banned law. So in Missouri you can buy, sell and trade exotic animals that are on the exotic. On the banned list in most places.
Bobby Lee
But, but did you notice in the documentary she's. She has the little ones too.
Tim Dillon
She's got them all right.
Bobby Lee
Spider monkey, but still they're deep. Like, the coveted thing is chimp. Right. They can have 50 of the little guys. Right. But they're like dreaming of chimp, right?
Andrew Santino
Chimp. The biggest one. You can have a gorilla. You can get a gorilla.
Bobby Lee
No, you can't. But I'm seeing. I'm sure that's the biggest one.
Andrew Santino
That's the hope.
Tim Dillon
No, I think they can. Seriously, I think they can have any. You can.
Bobby Lee
You can't have a gorilla. There's no. We can have.
Tim Dillon
Look at that. What's the largest exotic animal you can purchase in America? On the documentary, they talk, they show you one of these like exotic animal auctions. People buy the wildest fucking shit that you know like you've ever seen. Those like chic's that have like, of course, white tigers. White tigers in there in their fucking kitchen.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Andrew Santino
There was. In a house in Beverly Hills. Supposedly there was a guy who had a couple of tigers in the backyard.
Tim Dillon
Some incredible.
Andrew Santino
Pretty fucking cool.
Bobby Lee
But in the. Yeah, it is in the, in the documentary though, they show past incidences, like famous incidences with chimpanzees. And you notice when the chip. Because they, they never leave the house and they're in A cage.
Tim Dillon
They're supposed to, right.
Bobby Lee
They're supposed to be around one of them, right. For like a year. Would just be sit like rocking back and forth, right. What do you do at that point?
Tim Dillon
You, you got to shoot it.
Bobby Lee
No, no.
Tim Dillon
Got to shoot it.
Bobby Lee
You know, I'm a champ.
Tim Dillon
It's going to kill you.
Bobby Lee
Am I doing a good job?
Tim Dillon
Yeah, that looks like.
Andrew Santino
Why, why, why would you have a chimp and just have it sit in the cage and do that? It's kind of disturbing.
Tim Dillon
Well, psychologically, what they kind of, what they break down in, this is.
Andrew Santino
That's not even impressive.
Tim Dillon
No.
Andrew Santino
If I went to your house and I saw like an animal, like doing this.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah.
Andrew Santino
I'm not.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
I'm like, that's not really.
Tim Dillon
No.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah.
Tim Dillon
I gotta get my Uber.
Bobby Lee
You have a fentanyl monkey.
Tim Dillon
They talk about in the thing. They talk about the psychology of these women who fall in love. They think that they value them more than their own children. Because she says it in there. She goes, a baby only needs you for so long. The chimp.
Bobby Lee
That's what it is.
Tim Dillon
The chimp needs you for life.
Bobby Lee
It's, it's, that's a, it's a baby. That's a baby forever.
Tim Dillon
Forever. They know they have the needs of a baby and they never grow. Even when they're 40. They don't grow out of those instinct needs of you. But if they don't get to play with other monkeys at some point. That's it.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, that's it.
Tim Dillon
That's it.
Andrew Santino
So these are women who want to have a baby forever. So they get a chimp and they.
Bobby Lee
Have babies of their own. But after like three or four years.
Tim Dillon
They'Re like, well, the kids even say there's kids interviewed in the documentary. They're like, she doesn't fucking love us.
Andrew Santino
There's no way any of these women are good mothers.
Bobby Lee
Oh, no, no, no, no.
Andrew Santino
There's no way. Like, their kids are like, she was an amazing mom and also had this chimp. No way. There's something broken.
Bobby Lee
Something broken? Yeah, something broke. Something broke.
Tim Dillon
Yeah. They talk about the kid. They interview some of the kids and you know, they have to unfortunately, on camera, passively go, no, yeah, no, she, she, she did a good job raising us. She just loves, she loves her chimps, right? I mean, you can see the sadness in the through line. It's right, it's the documentary. Fantastic.
Andrew Santino
Does the do, does any of the chimps act out violently?
Tim Dillon
Oh, yeah, okay. I mean, they show you some footage on there. It's wild.
Bobby Lee
There's one that I had to pause and walk away and go, that's. I can't do.
Tim Dillon
Well, you'll remember when we were kids, famously, one of the women went on Oprah because her face.
Bobby Lee
This is what happens.
Tim Dillon
Her face was taken, removed. She went on. Look at the picture of the chimp attack woman. Oprah.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. That's the light.
Tim Dillon
Is that her?
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah.
Tim Dillon
She went on Oprah and she had to wear a veil. Tim, you would love this for you new show.
Andrew Santino
I gotta be honest, not only would I love her for the show, but I don't think she looks that bad.
Tim Dillon
No, she doesn't. It's not bad.
Andrew Santino
He actually doesn't look that bad, by the way. There are people in LA walking around that look. Exactly. I've lived here long enough where that doesn't shock me at all. Gypsy woman with one eye. That shocks no one. That shocks no one.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I've seen that too, I guess.
Tim Dillon
Look at the. Look at. Look at her up on a chimp woman on Oprah. She had to wear a veil. And then Oprah. That's the funniest clip. They use it in the movie. Oprah goes, can we. Can we lift up the veil?
Bobby Lee
Oh, yeah, yeah. Can we lift it? The veil.
Andrew Santino
That's bad.
Bobby Lee
That's pretty bad.
Andrew Santino
That's a rough one.
Tim Dillon
Yeah, yeah, it's tough.
Andrew Santino
Now, wait a minute. Is that Oprah? Which one? Who's that?
Bobby Lee
That's Oprah, Tim. What the.
Tim Dillon
Before the money, Oprah.
Andrew Santino
By the way, that's almost no thought being put into that. All she should think about is the veil.
Bobby Lee
I know. It makes it more ominous almost.
Tim Dillon
Yeah, yeah, yeah. It looks like the Batman villain.
Andrew Santino
Well, this is a perfect. Like, this is an Islam. Like, go with that. Go.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Andrew Santino
Just start thinking about it.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, you think?
Tim Dillon
Just where I. Oh, just convert to Muslim.
Andrew Santino
You convert immediately.
Tim Dillon
That's actually smart. The documentary, though, it does something. It's so powerful the way it tells this story, because I'm not giving anything away, but the guy who's making it, there it is. The guy who's making it can't really make it. They have to, like, go incognito while they're making it.
Andrew Santino
Why?
Tim Dillon
It's brilliant. Because he's not. He's a known figure.
Bobby Lee
Because he did.
Tim Dillon
He directed Tiger Tiger King.
Bobby Lee
Oh, right. So there. And then when he asked the lady, can I do. And there's like, I don't want to work with you.
Tim Dillon
Nobody in the chimp community Likes this guy because he's exposed the exotic animal community.
Bobby Lee
So they hired. He'd hired an actor to act as the director.
Tim Dillon
It's fascinating.
Bobby Lee
It's fascinating.
Andrew Santino
It's amazing.
Tim Dillon
It did such a great job.
Bobby Lee
It's a great job.
Tim Dillon
Yeah. I want to see characters like this on your show, and that's a perfect transition because I do want to talk about it. Tim's got a new show on Netflix.
Andrew Santino
Yeah. We're excited about it. We're trying to get people like this who don't have faces. And, you know, what is it I want?
Tim Dillon
This is your country.
Bobby Lee
Oh, this is the talk show.
Andrew Santino
Yeah, it's a talk show. We're trying to bring back, like, a Jerry Springer type concept.
Tim Dillon
You know, this was my senior ditch day in high school. We went to Jerry Springer.
Bobby Lee
That's awesome.
Andrew Santino
Was it in Connecticut?
Tim Dillon
No, in Chicago. He came out of Chicago.
Andrew Santino
He was out of Chicago.
Tim Dillon
That's awesome. We did a senior ditch day and went down there. And, dude, I love Jerry Springer so much in high school because it was. It was a perfect world of comedy. It was pure comedy.
Andrew Santino
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
And it's comedy on purpose where, like, people are taking it serious. But you're like, do you not understand that this is.
Andrew Santino
No, I think it's funny. It's like. It's also ends that those shows end up being, weirdly a better satire of America than The Daily Show, 100%. Because, like, this is what we got. These are the voters. These are the people.
Tim Dillon
This is who's out there.
Andrew Santino
These are all real people. These are no scripts. They're not actors. They came on. We did, like, 20, 25 minutes with each group. We edited it down because, like, you gotta get. You know, like. Because a lot of people that aren't accustomed to being on tv, we'll just drone on for hours about something. So you got to edit it down to, like. But it's amazing.
Tim Dillon
I mean, can we show the trailer?
Andrew Santino
Absolutely.
Bobby Lee
Before you do.
Andrew Santino
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
Can I ask you a favor?
Andrew Santino
Sure.
Bobby Lee
Can I please. You know how in. What's his name?
Tim Dillon
Just breathe. It's okay.
Bobby Lee
I'm very emotional.
Tim Dillon
Yeah. What's going on?
Bobby Lee
I just want to be like a handler.
Andrew Santino
Come be a handler.
Bobby Lee
Like, I bring guests on stage. I don't say much.
Andrew Santino
Yes.
Tim Dillon
You know, you're like, Steve. You Steve Wilkos.
Bobby Lee
Yes, still Wilkos.
Tim Dillon
But that's what I want to be with security.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, but I'll be security.
Tim Dillon
Making him security is.
Andrew Santino
So we want security that, like, the idea would be security that runs away. Like, I just Want cowards.
Bobby Lee
I got to be your main.
Andrew Santino
Yeah, we want coward. We want people running away. You never Than if a melee brawl starts and me and you run away out of the. It would be the greatest moment ever. Just run away.
Bobby Lee
You don't even have to pay me to let me do it. Please.
Andrew Santino
Oh, absolutely.
Bobby Lee
Okay, cool. Thank you.
Tim Dillon
All right, let's see it. I do want to watch it again. It's fantastic.
Andrew Santino
You're here to confess to your girlfriend that you used to do porn.
Tim Dillon
Yeah. The music.
Andrew Santino
Hello, pigs. I think we can all agree. The rotting corpse of an empire and we live in hell. Your husband brought you here today because he wants to confess something. Wait a minute, wait a minute. Hold on. Let's talk to the food poison. Drug addicted sex criminals who live here.
Tim Dillon
Play Minecraft Fortnite.
Andrew Santino
I've never met a more hateable person. How do you think she's gonna react when you tell her What? Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Bobby Lee
Wait a second. No. Are you insane?
Andrew Santino
We pop it out up.
Tim Dillon
We popped it up.
Bobby Lee
Kidding me, y'all.
Andrew Santino
Three years I got to deal with.
Bobby Lee
You since I was a child. I don't know any life that's not like this.
Andrew Santino
Oh, that's.
Bobby Lee
Oh, shut the up.
Andrew Santino
This is what America's about. The Unabomber wants to say, bring out the bbl.
Bobby Lee
Usa. Usa.
Tim Dillon
Usa.
Andrew Santino
My name is Tim Dillon, and regrettably, this is your country.
Bobby Lee
Wow. Really?
Andrew Santino
We had some homeless people, I think, in the audience because we shot it in Van Nuys and we just. People, like, came out of tents and got involved.
Tim Dillon
Central cast, right?
Andrew Santino
It's great.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
That's so fun.
Bobby Lee
You've done one episode.
Andrew Santino
We've done one. We're putting it out and we're super excited. We didn't know what was going to. It was a weird thing because they wanted us to do something like, political. And I was like, it's boring. Boring. It's just boring going to political convention. Nobody's going to ever do it better than Triumph. Nobody's going to ever do the Daily show better than Jon Stewart. No one's going to like everybody, you know? So I said, maybe we'll bring back something people haven't seen in a while and it'll just be silly and like our dream. We have dream ones that we couldn't get. But like, our dream segments are like, my husband said he was at January 6, but he was just cheating on me. Yeah, My sugar daddy's going to cut off my ozone pick and I'm scared of what I'll Eat. Yeah, Things like that. Like, we have dream ones where, like, we want to put things out into the universe and get these people.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah. But are. I didn't see any violence.
Andrew Santino
There's no real violence because the people there. There is arguments and there is anger.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah.
Andrew Santino
But violence is harder to get to. And a lot of the Jerry violence. I think some of it was staged. It was.
Tim Dillon
A lot of it was staged, and.
Andrew Santino
None of this is staged. So the reality is, it's like our hope is that if we get more episodes, there is violence. Naturally, we hope for.
Bobby Lee
There needs to be violence.
Andrew Santino
The hope is that we're going to get violence. But we have the word now. We learned a lot doing it. We made some mistakes and then corrected them so that we had two shoots. We figured it all out, and then we're going to try to get. If we keep doing it, we'd love to get some people that really are going to attack each other while me and you run out.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
Jerry Springer did turn into this fake fight show, which I think was partially the demise of the show because it organically was so wild.
Andrew Santino
It's got to be organic. Somebody's got to really want to fight. Yeah, I don't want. Nobody's got to want to fight. But there are, like, we have a guy confessing he lost a lot of money to his wife with crypto. We have people like, you know, we have all kinds of stuff going on. That's interesting. Guy saying, I used to be a porn star chick. Like, and these are all. These are all real things, but, like, nobody slapped anybody else, but, you know, knock on wood. That could happen.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
I really hope it does.
Andrew Santino
That's the hope.
Bobby Lee
My name is Yashi Toto for this.
Andrew Santino
Yeah, yeah.
Tim Dillon
He's still working on the character.
Bobby Lee
I'm working on the character. Dude, I'm gonna.
Andrew Santino
No, it's me and you run out of the studio during a large fight, and then there's a kind of an older female security guard who is tasked with handling everything.
Tim Dillon
Do you have this woman cast?
Andrew Santino
No, but it would be hilarious. A female. Like, an older female security guard trying to get a handle on everything. Me and Bobby sprint out of this.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah.
Andrew Santino
Run out.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah.
Tim Dillon
Let her deal with it.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah. I hope this is a hit.
Andrew Santino
I hope it is, too.
Tim Dillon
When's it come out?
Andrew Santino
October 1st.
Tim Dillon
October 1st.
Bobby Lee
October 1st.
Tim Dillon
This will be out on Netflix. You got to go watch.
Andrew Santino
Yeah, we hope it. It should be fun.
Tim Dillon
There's no chance. It won't. It won't be Successful. I told you. Yeah, it's fantastic.
Andrew Santino
Well, I'm glad we did this. And not because they were like, go to the convention and talk to people. And I go, why? Yeah, 20 people doing that.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
And then they were really cool. Netflix was awesome. We said, we'd like to do this. And they said, okay, cool, and left us alone.
Tim Dillon
Because if you go to the convention and do the chat things that's already on YouTube. There's, like, a dozen of those videos right now.
Andrew Santino
Everybody's doing that.
Tim Dillon
You'll never beat YouTub fast. It's already out.
Andrew Santino
It's ready out, and it's gonna. What's the point? Yeah, there's nothing to be learned anymore about people's, like, opinions about politics. The only thing that's left to be learned is, like, how are people living? What are people doing? That's the more interesting element than, like, why you like Trump or why you like Kamala. It's like, what do you. How do you earn money? How does your family dynamic work? Like, what do you. Who do you hate?
Tim Dillon
And why would you take this to another state and move it? I mean, shoot it in different places?
Andrew Santino
I would shoot it wherever. Absolutely.
Tim Dillon
I think it'd be interesting to, like, shoot and shoot episodes in different spots. I know that's more expensive.
Andrew Santino
No, no, I agree with you.
Tim Dillon
Because then you really get a gist of, like, the, you know, shoot at Nevada, then you're in Washington.
Andrew Santino
We flew these people in.
Tim Dillon
Oh, you did?
Andrew Santino
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
From all over.
Andrew Santino
From all over.
Tim Dillon
Okay, right on.
Andrew Santino
Because, you know, but we would. I. You know, it depends on where they'd want to shoot it, but I would shoot it wherever.
Tim Dillon
Let's take these people that got flown in. What's the. What's was the general spot that a lot of them came from? We talking Florida?
Andrew Santino
I'm trying to think. There was Colorado. There was Florida.
Tim Dillon
Gotta be Florida.
Bobby Lee
How do you submit to be on the show?
Andrew Santino
Well, we do as a casting call. We're like, do you. Are you this person? Do you want to reveal a thing? Do you want to do whatever? People do it. People like, why would anyone go on that? I go, anyone will do anything.
Tim Dillon
Yeah, people want to.
Andrew Santino
I love all this idea. People are like, why would anyone go on a show like that? You go, anyone will do anything. What are you talking about? Are you crazy?
Bobby Lee
Yeah. Yeah.
Andrew Santino
There's no value to dignity anymore in this country. There's no economic value to it, and there's no emotional value. Like, you don't even sound good anymore if you tell someone you passed up on something and you go, I'm not gonna go make a fool out of myself. No matter what it is. People go, I don't know. No matter what it is. It used to be like, 20 years ago, you'd tell a guy at a bar, they want me to go make my family into a laughing stock, and I'm not doing that. And the guy go, good for you. Now the same guy, I don't know. I would have maybe done that. There's not much left. There's no meat on the bone. So it's like, maybe something would have walked out. May work out right now, what did.
Tim Dillon
You think you learned over the course of the show? What's the collective thought after seeing all these people do all this shit? What's the one thing you took away from it? Genuinely?
Andrew Santino
No, genuinely. What I took away was, number one, how hard it is to do these types of shows because you don't have a script. You can't just re edit, go back and say, let's do it again. That's not the way it works.
Bobby Lee
Right.
Andrew Santino
If somebody's going to say something to someone else, they say it one time. You're doing it in front of a live audience.
Tim Dillon
Right.
Andrew Santino
So I had to learn how to be a talk show host. And you. Because my podcast, I do it by myself. I just talk, right. So for me, it was like listening to people, and then. And I would lose track of time, so. In your PC, and they'd be like, all right, you've done 10 minutes with them. Like, you know, like. And I'd go, oh, okay, bring out the gas. Because there's always somebody we're bringing out, right? And a lot of times the people in the chairs don't know. So I'm like, you know, somebody's been listening backstage, and then we bring somebody else out. So it's like it was learning how to do all of that and then meet, like, re appreciating Springer, Jenny Jones, Ricky Lake Donahue Maury. All those people who did shit like that. Sally Jesse, appreciating it and going, oh, that was not. It was not as easy as it looked.
Tim Dillon
Right? It's not. I mean, you have to. You have to be a host, and you have to be kind of this. You're almost like a. You're almost manipulating them as you're telling the story with them.
Andrew Santino
And those shows did it every single day. Yeah, all year we had one shot. We had two live shows, Saturday and Sunday, and we edited them. You know, we shot 11 of these segments. We kept five.
Tim Dillon
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
So it took a minute. But as we get better at it, we would be able to, like, we would know. Now I know more about, like, okay, I understand why that segment. Some people say they have a problem with each other and then get on stage. They really don't. Of course they really don't.
Tim Dillon
We would find that out when we did Bad Friends Live stuff. We'd find out.
Andrew Santino
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
People would bail on a thing that we thought they were really committed to.
Andrew Santino
We had a woman who's a QAnon mom, and the older producers were like, she's a nut. Wait till you hear what she says. She's crazy. And then I brought her on stage. Go, what's your craziest opinion? She goes, I like Trump. I go, all right. Come on. Anything else?
Bobby Lee
Wow.
Andrew Santino
I'm like, are there tunnels underground? Like, give me something.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
It's like, I'm processing Second Amendment. I like Trump. And the LA producers were so crazy that they thought that was, like, the most con.
Bobby Lee
No.
Tim Dillon
Yeah, Right.
Andrew Santino
You know what I mean? They're like, wait till you hear what she says. And she's like, I just think Biden's too old. And they're like, see? What a nut job.
Tim Dillon
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
And I'm like, oh, no, this isn't. But we did find some. Some people that were. It was really good. And there was some magic on it that happened where you're just in awe of it. Some shit went down where you. You do just stand back and go, what the.
Tim Dillon
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
Is happening? It's kind of wild.
Bobby Lee
Well, the reason why this has legs is because there's two other comics that I can think of that had this, a daytime show. Do you know who they are?
Andrew Santino
Well, I don't remember.
Tim Dillon
No. I mean, probably Fox. Oh, yeah. Kirk.
Andrew Santino
Did he.
Bobby Lee
Greg Barrett.
Tim Dillon
Greg Barrett.
Bobby Lee
But the problem with those shows is that they try to be molded into a talk, like they're playing a role. So. But you. You're yourself here.
Andrew Santino
That's right. Yeah.
Bobby Lee
That's why this is.
Tim Dillon
He's in on the joke.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, that's what it is. These guys were trying to, like, wow. You know. Well, tell us. You know, they were just playing, like, some role.
Andrew Santino
But we're basically like Netflix. We were talking to them and we go, we want to satirize, like, America. And then the idea was like, well, let's talk to political figures and everything. And I'm like, but this is not America.
Tim Dillon
No.
Andrew Santino
So the Republican and Democrat conventions are not America. And then I thought about it, and I was like, and me and my collaborator, Brian Frangi, really smart, good writer. We were like. And I work with him on stuff, but he produced, co produces. We came up with the idea of basically going, like, why don't we just do like a talk show like we grew up with, but with modern problems.
Tim Dillon
Right?
Bobby Lee
I want to talk about Joker too.
Andrew Santino
Yeah. Well, let's do it.
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Andrew Santino
So, by the way, and I group, let's make some news because I'll talk right about it.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah. Tim was in Joker too. You guys know that.
Andrew Santino
I'll speak about it right now.
Bobby Lee
And he plays a security, like a.
Andrew Santino
A lot of people. A lot of people are on it in the press. Why panning on it. I don't know why, but I'll tell you right now, I had suggestions. They were not followed by the director.
Bobby Lee
Okay, okay.
Andrew Santino
By Joaquin.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah.
Andrew Santino
By Gaga. So the reality was I was a security guard. I had two or three lines. I felt underutilized. I said, I will direct it. I said, I will direct it or I will assistant direct it. I don't know who that guy was. He did something with Ben Affleck. I don't care.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
I would have done any of that. I would have done it. I would have done cinematography, which I didn't. I wasn't hugely clear on what exactly it entailed, but I knew that, like, I had a lot more to give that movie than it did accepted from me.
Bobby Lee
Right.
Tim Dillon
Sure.
Andrew Santino
Now, if it's a stunning success, I'm proud to be a part of it.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
But if it does fail, it is because they didn't utilize me in a proper way. But if it's a success, I am proud to be a part of it.
Bobby Lee
But what was it like, fails? What was it like? Because I know your scene, it has. Joaquin was in the scene. Right.
Andrew Santino
He was in the scene.
Bobby Lee
Right. So what was that like?
Andrew Santino
I didn't. I didn't learn the lines.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
Because they always lie. The agent lies and they go. They want you to be you and be funny and they lie.
Bobby Lee
Right.
Andrew Santino
They don't want that. And Andrew's a great actor and he does like the work of it.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
I showed up and I'm like, I'm going.
Bobby Lee
I'm okay, too. Yeah.
Andrew Santino
Know both of you. Both of you. But I. He was the one. I. He's white. But what I was saying is.
Tim Dillon
Thank you.
Andrew Santino
I showed up and I was like, you know, I didn't. You didn't get the script ahead of time because they were. They didn't want you to leak it.
Bobby Lee
Oh, I hate when they do that.
Andrew Santino
They give you lines in the morning and I, like, read Them real quick. And I guess I should have drilled them a little more, but they kept changing them, and, you know, I was a bit nervous. And it's wake. Never done a scene in any movie in my life before. This is the first scene in any movie I've ever done in my whole entire life.
Tim Dillon
It's just Joaquin.
Andrew Santino
Joaquin.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
And Brendan Gleason. Holy wow. Genius.
Bobby Lee
Genius.
Andrew Santino
Okay.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
So I'm, like, scared.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
Truly, truly terrified. Like, I'm not even kidding. Like, I'm nervous in my trailer. I called my agent. I don't even think I should be in this.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
No, no, no.
Bobby Lee
I love it.
Andrew Santino
It's all fine. It's good.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
Okay.
Andrew Santino
Because I'm out of my element. This is not what I do.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
And. But I'm. I listen. I like acting. I like challenges and whatever, But a. It's a tough one to start with. There's a lot of blocking in the scene. There's a book that I have to move across the table. There's lines. But, like, as I'm doing the lines, like the. You don't have to look. Like, the director would come up to me, goes, listen, here's a scene. You say your first line. After you say your first line, you move your book. The book. You put your hands on the book. Don't block the title of the book.
Bobby Lee
Don't block the COVID Yeah.
Andrew Santino
Move it. 70% across the desk. 80%. It's at a frame. Do you get that?
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
Go. Yes. And he'd go. Then you're gonna look. And Brendan. You're gonna look at Brendan, but you're gonna wait for him to say his line.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
After that, Joaquin's gonna pick up the phone. At that point, you wait one beat, you say half of your line. Okay. Joaquin's gonna look at you. He gives you a look. He acknowledges that you're there.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
And then you finish your second line.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
Okay. I don't know what. And he would say this to me. He'd go, what the fuck is the problem here? Because he was being very like. And I get it. I respect him. He's a great director. I like being yelled at and was deserved.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
And. But Joaquin was like, he's doing fine. Like, Joaquin would turn around to the director and go, he's.
Bobby Lee
He's.
Andrew Santino
He's okay. And I'm like, I'm doing fine.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
But they would yell. So then there was like 80 people around. You were on the Universal lot, all the cameras. Okay. And then they would go, action. And I would Go. I mean, I would it up every which way. One time. One time I was sitting there nervous. I didn't even say the line.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
I just moved the book. I just moved the book and looked away and the director starts going, why the are you looking away?
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wow.
Andrew Santino
He goes, just say the goddamn line.
Bobby Lee
Does that make you even more nervous?
Tim Dillon
Oh, my.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. Yeah. I can't imagine.
Andrew Santino
This was one of the worst experiences of my entire life. Except it was good at the end, I guess. I don't know.
Bobby Lee
Did you sing?
Andrew Santino
What?
Bobby Lee
Did you sing? Sing?
Andrew Santino
No, it's. It's a musical. I should have.
Bobby Lee
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Andrew Santino
I couldn't even speak, so then he would come up to me sing.
Tim Dillon
He can't get through a line in.
Andrew Santino
A bookshelf, so he'd go like this. But it was hard, I'm telling you.
Tim Dillon
I know. I'm. I know it was, but it's just. His questioning is.
Andrew Santino
No, it just made me so. But I get it.
Bobby Lee
I apologize. I apologize.
Andrew Santino
But I should have sang.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah.
Andrew Santino
But the point is, I was there, and then I would do it again, and then he would come up to me and go, okay. He'd go. He goes. Listen. He goes. The line is actually this. And I said. And I'm not saying that. He goes, no, you've never said that. Never said the line.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah.
Andrew Santino
Because you've actually never said this line. And I said. He goes. So he goes, just forget it. He goes, just say. He goes. This. Just say close enough to it, you know?
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
And then eventually I got it and I did it, but it was very hard. It's like, hard to do. And I felt bad because, again, I'm not an expert. And I felt bad.
Bobby Lee
It's your first one.
Tim Dillon
What are the chances the scene does not make it?
Andrew Santino
I didn't think it was going to be in it.
Bobby Lee
Okay, but is it? Do you know it's in it. Yeah.
Tim Dillon
That's great.
Bobby Lee
That's great.
Tim Dillon
Do we see a photo of you on the Internet at all?
Andrew Santino
I don't think. I think maybe there's one little photo.
Tim Dillon
Oh, really?
Andrew Santino
I haven't seen the scene because it's not a pivotal scene, I don't think.
Tim Dillon
Where is it?
Andrew Santino
Yeah, that's. Yeah, it's with security guards.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
Yeah, it's with security guards. But I didn't. I didn't know if they were going to put it in, but they put it in because Todd said he got it at the end. He said it was good at the end.
Tim Dillon
End, Zoom in. Is that him?
Andrew Santino
I don't know where I am. Where am I?
Tim Dillon
There's Timmy.
Bobby Lee
There's Timmy.
Tim Dillon
There's Timmy.
Bobby Lee
Timmy.
Andrew Santino
D. And maybe. And you know what? It looked. I look like I'm doing acting there.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
So I actually look like I'm doing.
Bobby Lee
If I saw that photo, I was like, oh, that guy's a good actor.
Andrew Santino
No. And you know what? Maybe, literally, maybe I shouldn't have said anything because maybe my scene is great.
Tim Dillon
I bet you it is.
Andrew Santino
I bet it is.
Bobby Lee
Here's the problem.
Tim Dillon
It's shot so beautifully.
Bobby Lee
We internalize it because the things that we're feeling and thinking. Right. No one else feels. Or things.
Andrew Santino
That's right.
Bobby Lee
But because it happens to us. Right. It becomes a big thing.
Andrew Santino
I think I. Just because I wasn't saying the line or doing the blocking doesn't mean I was doing a bad job.
Bobby Lee
Exactly.
Andrew Santino
No, I was.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
I mean, that's feeling.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah.
Andrew Santino
Because I was feeling it out. And that's what actors do.
Tim Dillon
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
I'm like, becoming the, you know, thing.
Tim Dillon
How was this guy in the middle that's kind of Ricky Gervais looking? Was he good?
Andrew Santino
Yeah, he was really. They're all really. Here's the thing.
Tim Dillon
I mean, Gleason's phenomenal.
Andrew Santino
They're all really good. All these actors in this film were excellent. And it's hard to be an actor because I was talking to them and, like, they. They just got out of COVID and they hadn't booked anything. And a lot of them were like, this is their big thing. One guy went out and got Covet and they had to get rid of him.
Bobby Lee
Wow.
Tim Dillon
Jesus.
Andrew Santino
And this was like his thing. It was his time.
Bobby Lee
I have a story that's kind of like this. Forget it. Forget it. I still forget. Forget it.
Andrew Santino
I'm interested.
Bobby Lee
No, no, freaking forget. Forget. I'm not even gonna do it now.
Tim Dillon
What is it?
Bobby Lee
What's the look for? That was rude.
Tim Dillon
I was waiting for you to tell your story.
Andrew Santino
No.
Bobby Lee
You're like, how dare you interrupt this magical thing we got going on?
Tim Dillon
Well, no, I mean, he has given us some really great, juicy. But. But no, let's hear.
Bobby Lee
No, I don't want to know. Not even. It's not even that good. Now let's go back to the.
Tim Dillon
No, we're not going to carry out.
Bobby Lee
Thanksgiving was. I saw Thanksgiving. You were great in that.
Andrew Santino
Thanksgiving was good.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Andrew Santino
Thanksgiving was really good. And. But this is.
Tim Dillon
Tell your story.
Bobby Lee
I'm not Thanksgiving.
Andrew Santino
What movie was it that you had?
Bobby Lee
Forget it. It's okay.
Tim Dillon
No, no, don't let it.
Bobby Lee
When you were.
Andrew Santino
When you did a bad acting job. What movie?
Bobby Lee
It was pretty bad.
Andrew Santino
Well, cuz that's what I'm.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah. So anyway, and you. You know, that's all.
Tim Dillon
Well, come on, tell your story for real.
Bobby Lee
Well, cut it out then, because I don't think it's going to hit now.
Tim Dillon
What? Tell it.
Bobby Lee
If you're. If this. Can we do the segue again then?
Andrew Santino
Yes, let's do.
Bobby Lee
Let's do this segue. Well, you got. Do you remember what you're talking about? Anyway? Yeah. So this and that. Yeah.
Andrew Santino
Did you ever have any experience?
Bobby Lee
No, I'm doing it. All right. I get to do it.
Andrew Santino
I didn't know.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
I'm very good at Segways.
Bobby Lee
I know you're very good. Oh, wow. So. Yeah. Gleason. Wow. Well, I have a story kind of like this.
Tim Dillon
What is that?
Andrew Santino
What happened?
Bobby Lee
That was so good.
Tim Dillon
Yeah, thanks.
Bobby Lee
And I wish that happened before. No, don't you wish it.
Andrew Santino
Have you ever had an experience that's similar to mine? It's over, Tim.
Tim Dillon
What is the experience? What happened?
Bobby Lee
Well, I was in the movie the Dictator.
Tim Dillon
Yeah, we remember. Great film. Beautiful. Playing Kim Jong un.
Bobby Lee
No, I wasn't playing Kim Jong un.
Tim Dillon
No, no, I'm serious.
Bobby Lee
That's what I'm saying.
Andrew Santino
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
Already now.
Andrew Santino
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
This is what's gonna happen.
Tim Dillon
That's not Kim Jong un.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, that's not Kim Jong un. Right. So I have this. Right. So I have a couple of scenes this movie.
Tim Dillon
Okay.
Bobby Lee
And I have my. That's my wife in the movie. Dude. I'm handsome, though.
Tim Dillon
You look really good, though.
Bobby Lee
I look so good, though.
Tim Dillon
You really do. Yeah.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. So there's a scene where I'm walking out of a bathroom with Ed Norton.
Andrew Santino
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
And I just blew Ed Norton in the bathroom.
Andrew Santino
Okay.
Bobby Lee
Right. And so Larry Charles and Sasha are on set and they're like, all right, Bobby, you're gonna walk out first, right? You're gonna hit the mark, Right. Turn around, right? And then he's gonna come from behind you. And this whole thing. I have to memorize this whole thing, Right? Just like yours. That's why I'm saying the story right hard. So I'm like kind of panicking. I'm doing the best I can. I'm going, okay, hit the marker, turn left. See the line? This and that. And he's gonna walk this way, right? So me and Ed get. Go into the bathroom and he goes. Ed Norton goes, nah, we're not doing that way I go, well, he goes, I'm gonna go out first. And I go, what? Yeah. And I'm so. You know, I know. He said to say that I think it's better if I say this. Then you turn around, you do that, you know, I mean, and he. Change is the whole fucking thing. And now in my mind, I'm like, oh, fuck. Whose idea do I do?
Tim Dillon
Right, right.
Bobby Lee
Do I do Ed Norton's or Larry the director's? In your head, you're like, the director, right? Even though he's a star. Right? So that I said something. This is the smartest thing I've ever done. I went, you know what, dude? I love that. That's fucking great. Let's do it Larry's way first. And the second tape, we'll do it your way. And he kind of thought about it, and he goes, does. All right, man.
Tim Dillon
He'll hate you forever now. Why that? Yeah, you don't step on Ed Nord. Wait, Fight Club.
Bobby Lee
What? What?
Tim Dillon
You going to step on Fight Club?
Bobby Lee
Are you out of your mind right now?
Tim Dillon
Shouldn't have done it.
Andrew Santino
It was incredibly disrespectful to Ed.
Bobby Lee
Are you joking me with me right now, dude?
Tim Dillon
Yeah. Yes. Relax.
Bobby Lee
All right.
Tim Dillon
Jesus Christ. You're getting so caught up.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, that scene.
Tim Dillon
He's handsome.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, he's very handsome.
Tim Dillon
That is really. But it's an interesting note, though, that he told you he wanted to go out first. You think that has to do with Is that Star?
Bobby Lee
Yes, it could have been.
Tim Dillon
Is that Star.
Bobby Lee
He's. He's also an actor's actor, right?
Tim Dillon
I know, but that's also some star.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Tim Dillon
Like, you know, Tom Cruise will say that often, that people. It'll be written a certain way, and he'll often be like, no, no, no. I want to be in the front of the line.
Andrew Santino
Joaquin would do stuff like that on set because, you know, he'd go, I. I'd like it to go there. I'd think this way. And he's a genius.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
Guys like, yes.
Andrew Santino
Probably our greatest, greatest living actors. Top five. He's in there.
Tim Dillon
I mean, him.
Bobby Lee
It's gotta be Daniel Day Lewis. Let's go through the list. Daniel Day Lewis, right? That Joaquin Phoenix. Joaquin, right.
Tim Dillon
Kevin James.
Andrew Santino
Kevin James. We Bought a Zoo. That's Kevin. What would happen if someone.
Bobby Lee
Kevin James.
Tim Dillon
Yes.
Bobby Lee
Who's those?
Andrew Santino
You know, it's good. Kevin James. Red Governor's Comedy Club in Long Island. I'm headlining my first time.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
The owner of Governor's. Great guy. Love him. Jimmy Comes back to me. Italian gay swag comes back, he goes, listen, he goes, kevin James is doing his new TV show on Long Island. I go, great, that's. We love him. And that's great. He goes, he's coming tonight. He's doing 20 minutes on all your headlining shows right before you go up.
Tim Dillon
Great.
Andrew Santino
So he's going to be the host, the feature Kevin James for 20 minutes and then you.
Tim Dillon
Great.
Andrew Santino
Okay, now listen, if you're. So Kevin James goes up and they bring him up and they go, ladies and gentlemen, you know, every now and then we get a drop and you know how it goes. Yeah, the King of Queens.
Bobby Lee
Oh, he's already famous.
Andrew Santino
Oh, he's. He's bringing. He's coming back to tv. He's massive.
Bobby Lee
Okay, okay. I thought this was young Kevin.
Tim Dillon
No, this is before he made his second TV show.
Bobby Lee
Huge.
Andrew Santino
Kevin James comes out, right? He gets an applause break in Long island that I would only describe as like. It's unreal, right? It's like. It's just.
Bobby Lee
It's John Lennon coming back to alive for the Beatles reunion.
Andrew Santino
Kind of one of those. You know what I mean? It's one of those things. It's like crazy, right? And it's several minutes of clapping and standing before he does his first joke. He then kills for 20 minutes with like new stuff, with just stuff he thought of, like whatever, murdering. Then he leaves. Then the host comes back on and goes, now, please. Wel. By the way, no introduction goes, now please welcome Tim Dylan. I walk out on stage.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
The people in the back are so drunk, they think it's still Kevin James.
Bobby Lee
Wow.
Andrew Santino
They're. They're far away. They're in the back and they're drunk.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Andrew Santino
So they're just looking at shapes.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah.
Andrew Santino
And they're going. And then literally I start to talk and people audibly start yelling, that's not Kevin James.
Bobby Lee
Wow.
Andrew Santino
They think like they. They switched out Kevin James in the middle of upset.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
They're drunk now. They go, what happened?
Bobby Lee
We.
Andrew Santino
Who's this?
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah, this isn't Kevin James.
Andrew Santino
Yeah, this is something.
Bobby Lee
You have a story like that?
Tim Dillon
No, I don't.
Bobby Lee
Do you have a story like that?
Tim Dillon
No, never.
Andrew Santino
What?
Tim Dillon
No, I. No, I. I never had a. I had. I do a mid bump.
Bobby Lee
I do have a story like that. See, I don't like this, what you're doing, dude.
Tim Dillon
What am I doing?
Bobby Lee
Get excited about my stories too, you know.
Tim Dillon
Oh, my God, I'm excited, Tim. Wait till you hear this story.
Andrew Santino
Do you have a Story like that.
Bobby Lee
That you never forget it.
Tim Dillon
I mean, I get bumped to the Comedy Store more than anybody on Earth. And I've said this before to Bill, I think Burr specifically, it comes in, he's like, who's on. Who's in Maine? And they're like, santino's on X. He goes, me. He bumps me every time.
Bobby Lee
Wow.
Tim Dillon
Without fail. I think I said that to you. I was like, it's. It's magical.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
I think he loves bumping my.
Bobby Lee
He doesn't go long, so that's good.
Tim Dillon
No, I think he's just. I think it's just. Yes, he knows me, so he doesn't care.
Bobby Lee
Like, who do you. Do you. Have you. Have you been bumped at the Comedy Store?
Andrew Santino
I think we all got bumped by Leslie Jones.
Tim Dillon
Leslie Jones.
Bobby Lee
Oh, that's right.
Tim Dillon
Yeah. She's bumped me.
Bobby Lee
How did you feel about that?
Andrew Santino
I didn't love it, but it's okay. I just said, I'll just leave.
Tim Dillon
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
We just get in my car and I leave. Yeah.
Andrew Santino
I just leave.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. Sometimes we don't even show up. That's right.
Andrew Santino
A lot of times we're being bumped and we don't even know because we're at our house, we're gone.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, that's true. That's true. But do you think that's bad karma on our part?
Tim Dillon
No.
Bobby Lee
Like, calling in.
Andrew Santino
No, no, no, no, it's fine.
Bobby Lee
It is.
Andrew Santino
No.
Tim Dillon
I used to get bumped to the Laugh Factory back. Nothing Means Anything by Dane used to love bumping.
Bobby Lee
Oh, he loves it.
Tim Dillon
And he would bump into an hour back. Then that's when he would bump, you know, And I'd sit in the back, 30, 40, 50. And then by that time, you're. They're gone. You're gone. And then the next couple times I go back and I would tell Jamie, I'd say, oh, I'm not going to be, buddy. Why will you live? He going to be quick. I was like, no, no, I'm. I'm already home. I'm already home. That sometimes I would text a comic I knew that was there and was like, is he still on? Yeah, maybe he's cooking, baby. That's what he'd say about.
Bobby Lee
I haven't been in Laugh Factory since I broke his foot.
Tim Dillon
Yeah. Why?
Bobby Lee
Yeah, I broke his foot.
Tim Dillon
Danes.
Bobby Lee
No, Jamie Masada's.
Tim Dillon
Oh, my God.
Bobby Lee
I broke his fucking foot.
Andrew Santino
How?
Bobby Lee
I was like, I did a good spot. This is years ago. And I was in that front area, you know?
Tim Dillon
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
And, you know, he always hangs out there sitting on those stools. And I walk out to it, and I'm jumping up and down like a fucking orangutan, dude. I'm like, I killed it.
Andrew Santino
I killed it.
Bobby Lee
And I stomped on his foot. He screamed, right? And then two days later, he goes, I went to the hospital. You broke my foot. And I haven't really been in there since. I feel so bad.
Tim Dillon
You know what's so fun? He's like a fun little toy to play with because he's tiny.
Andrew Santino
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
And he. And. And he. I used to, like, bully him into money because they were. At one point, they were like, not paying anybody. Right, Right. And so I was like, give me money right now. Give me money. And I'd be joking with him, but he'd pull out money as, like, a bit. I'd see him go, okay, I'll give you a hundred dollars, buddy. For food. You want $100? And he'd pull out money, and I would steal money from him. And I did it a lot. Like, I would do this a lot. I feel like I did it way too much. And I would just grab his money, and he'd be like, buddy, come on. Come on. But I was like, no, you're fucking the club. Never paid.
Andrew Santino
It's Robin Hood. Do you play there?
Bobby Lee
I've never seen you at the Laugh Factory.
Andrew Santino
I go occasionally, and I'll do. There's a few shows there that I've done. That's fun. And it's always fun when I go. But I just. I don't know. I'm usually the improv in the story.
Tim Dillon
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
Store in the improv.
Bobby Lee
What's your favorite, though?
Andrew Santino
What.
Bobby Lee
What's your favorite store?
Andrew Santino
I think I all. You know, But I. I'm starting to love the improv a lot. And I. I would say, overall, the store, but I gotta be honest with you, the improv, especially recently, I feel like, is amazing.
Tim Dillon
I do love it.
Bobby Lee
I love it, too.
Andrew Santino
And I'm actually starting to like the Ice House.
Tim Dillon
Yeah. Even though after you and I had a real wild experience.
Andrew Santino
We had a wild experience, and I. I just didn't do well. And I handled it maturely. I went to, like, salt and Straw and just climbed in the thing, like, you know, with all the ice creams. I just climbed in. I said, just leave me here.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
But, yeah, like, he called me, goes, just come back. I'm like.
Tim Dillon
I go, tim, you gotta come back.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
Because it's the second. I was like, I hate it.
Tim Dillon
We can't not do the second show. Yeah. I'm not doing it.
Bobby Lee
I think they.
Andrew Santino
But I came back. I did come back.
Tim Dillon
You did?
Andrew Santino
I did come back.
Bobby Lee
They have changed, too.
Andrew Santino
Yeah. And it's better now.
Tim Dillon
It's really good.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because when I first went there, they were. They treated me so poorly.
Tim Dillon
Ah, right.
Bobby Lee
Like. Like they didn't know who I was.
Tim Dillon
They don't.
Bobby Lee
They're like, go around. I go, no, I've been coming for three years. This is where you come through. Go round. You have to walk around. And I just show my id.
Tim Dillon
Oh, yeah.
Bobby Lee
Right. And then come in and I'm like, where's the green rug? Only comics go in the green room. I go, I'm on the show. Like, that kind of vibe.
Tim Dillon
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
But then when I fucking talk shit. And then they.
Tim Dillon
Then they call it.
Andrew Santino
The best thing is watching someone go to the Mothership who doesn't know. Like, someone who just rolls in who's not known, and they roll in with, like, a crew of people, and it's like, oh, no, no, no, no, no. There's security. Like, this is a legit place now, obviously.
Bobby Lee
You mean a comic that comes in with a group of people.
Andrew Santino
Yeah, Like a person who just. Yeah, because there's just not knowing. Yeah, there's just not knowing.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
You know, and it's like. It's just funny to watch someone who's like, hey, this is my buddy, or whatever.
Tim Dillon
And. Yeah.
Andrew Santino
And then there's like. There's, like, you know, like, Navy SEALs looking at them. Just an energy. It's an energy, you know?
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
A bunch of guys kind of standing there, standing like this. Who's this? Like, oh, this is my buddy. He's just gonna hang out and they go, huh? They just look. There's a feeling.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
And I always like to watch that happen.
Tim Dillon
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
I wasn't. That night with Rogan, we went to Black Keys. That's when I realized, oh, he's the mayor of town.
Tim Dillon
Come on. Yeah.
Bobby Lee
He's the mayor of that town of Austin.
Andrew Santino
I mean, he's got absolutely.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. Bulletproof, you know, SUVs, security, the whole thing.
Andrew Santino
Absolutely.
Tim Dillon
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
That Black Keys concert was weird. It did feel like we were. The CIA was protecting us.
Bobby Lee
Right.
Tim Dillon
Like, I felt like we were being, like, watched and protected, like guys with radios and were talking to each other the whole time. Yeah.
Bobby Lee
Can I tell that my story now?
Tim Dillon
Yeah, please.
Bobby Lee
It was, like, a little too late, but give it. All right, so anyway.
Tim Dillon
What is it?
Bobby Lee
I did a movie.
Tim Dillon
What's the. What's the movie that you did?
Bobby Lee
With Henry la.
Tim Dillon
With who?
Bobby Lee
Henry la?
Andrew Santino
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
He's a pop. Korean pop star.
Andrew Santino
I love him.
Tim Dillon
What happened with Henry la?
Bobby Lee
Oh, it was crazy, dude.
Tim Dillon
Tell me.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, anyway, I did a movie with Henry la.
Tim Dillon
That movie, Final Recipe.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, there you go. I didn't. Michelle Yao is in it. And he's a. Right. So that. That event. So that event was like.
Tim Dillon
It looks like a K pop guy and his. His manager.
Bobby Lee
That's what.
Andrew Santino
I mean.
Bobby Lee
This is what happened.
Tim Dillon
It's like, look at these.
Bobby Lee
All K pop stars. Yeah, right? And they go, ladies and gentlemen, Henry Lau. Richard I. Introduce me first.
Tim Dillon
No, no, no.
Bobby Lee
Right. So the place goes insane. But in the. In the mayhem of the sound, they had said my name, but no one heard it, right, I believe. Right. And so I now look like. See, now I wish you didn't do the. I look like his manager.
Tim Dillon
You do.
Bobby Lee
I know, but the thing is. That was the joke.
Tim Dillon
Oh, I'm so sorry.
Andrew Santino
Oh, yeah.
Bobby Lee
So now I can't go, hey, hey. Now everyone thinks, right? I'm his manager.
Andrew Santino
But run it back.
Tim Dillon
Yeah, try it.
Andrew Santino
Just try it now. Yeah, try it now.
Tim Dillon
We'll cut it.
Andrew Santino
It's good.
Tim Dillon
Try it now.
Bobby Lee
Okay. Try it now.
Tim Dillon
Giggle.
Bobby Lee
Anyway, so, you know, we're at this pocket. Henry Lao comes out. The audience is right. And in the midst of this gigantic sound, they said my name. Now no one knows what. Now they think I'm his manager.
Tim Dillon
Oh, my God.
Andrew Santino
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
That's fucking funny.
Andrew Santino
It's crazy the way it all works.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. You know. You know?
Andrew Santino
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, it was crazy. Yeah.
Andrew Santino
You think Diddy is. Is going to be okay?
Bobby Lee
He's in trouble?
Tim Dillon
Yeah, he's going to be fine.
Bobby Lee
He's in big trouble.
Andrew Santino
I think he'll come back.
Tim Dillon
He'll bounce.
Andrew Santino
I think he'll be okay.
Tim Dillon
He'll bounce back. It happens.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, well, he's cooked to the ditter, son. He's cooked, son.
Tim Dillon
I mean, Eminem's lyric is phenomenal. Did you hear that?
Andrew Santino
Which one? What he say?
Tim Dillon
He goes, look up Eminem's lyric about him. It's actually because I don't want to misquote it. He goes like, I'm a R a P, E, R. Got so many essays, huh, Essay? And he goes, he didn't just leave out the. He didn't just leave out an R, A P, did he? My God. My God, listen to that.
Bobby Lee
How long ago was that?
Tim Dillon
I'm an R A, P, E, R. Got so many essays, huh? Essay. He didn't just leave out the letter P, did he? Jesus Christ.
Bobby Lee
Wow. Wow.
Tim Dillon
Eminem.
Andrew Santino
That's killer.
Tim Dillon
That is.
Bobby Lee
Did he just recently. Did he just recently write that?
Andrew Santino
But if Diddy is innocent, we're all going to feel stupid, including him. Yeah, take it back, Eminem, to be honest with you.
Tim Dillon
Take it back.
Bobby Lee
We'll feel bad.
Andrew Santino
Well, everyone will feel stupid. All of us.
Bobby Lee
Is there a shot that he can get out with good lawyers?
Tim Dillon
No.
Andrew Santino
Why?
Bobby Lee
Yeah, I mean, O.J.
Andrew Santino
Did when I was a kid.
Tim Dillon
Cochran's not around.
Andrew Santino
When I was in, all we believed in was high, probably profile defense attorneys. We grew up with them. I watched. We watched them get OG out. We watched him get all these people out. Like, we got excited. They all had names like. Like. Like Irv. Irv Fishman or Ben Brathman. And they would come in there and they would just kill. And this DA would get up and she'd be like, they found the gun. And he'd be like, you shut up. And he'd have a $4,000 suit.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
And he'd have a Rolex and he had a bunch of rings. And he go, look at this. Like, that's what he'd say. He'd go, look at this. And be some, like, frizzle haired. The state represented. And as kids, we were like, the best thing about our country is that if you're rich and you kill someone, you get one of these guys who are the coolest people in the world, Right. Johnny Cochran. What's the other guy's name? Bob Shapiro. Dude, these people are awesome.
Bobby Lee
Is Dershowitz one? Alan Dershowitz?
Tim Dillon
Well, yeah. And he went down with.
Bobby Lee
He went down to other.
Andrew Santino
He was a good one.
Bobby Lee
He was.
Tim Dillon
He went down the dirt.
Bobby Lee
Look at him. The dirt.
Tim Dillon
The dirt.
Bobby Lee
Look at him.
Tim Dillon
They got his ass.
Bobby Lee
They got him.
Tim Dillon
The dirt.
Andrew Santino
But he's still out there. He's debating CNN like he's on Piers Morgan all the time. Debating.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
Wow.
Tim Dillon
Man. They really. They made him look so bad, though. That's. That's. They. The dirt dog got taken down.
Bobby Lee
Well, what happened to him?
Tim Dillon
Because he's. He was. He wasn't he.
Bobby Lee
For.
Tim Dillon
What's his name? Yeah, he was defending all the flight logs and all that bullshit.
Andrew Santino
Well, he's trying to. He was like advancing the argument that Epstein had a nature conservatory.
Bobby Lee
Y. Yeah.
Andrew Santino
This whole thing's been a big misunderstanding.
Tim Dillon
Right. The guy just said, look at that. He had a green thumb.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Tim Dillon
Who you mean green thumb? Epstein?
Bobby Lee
Look, how many times did he go to the Island? Look at it. Look at that.
Andrew Santino
Him and Larry David. This is my Ninth time fight in a grocery store in Martha's Vineyard.
Tim Dillon
Him and Larry David.
Andrew Santino
Yeah. Larry Dave was, like, yelling at him because Dershowitz was like, I think, you know, obviously coming out for, like. Like Epstein and Trump and all this stuff, like, and. And Larry David and him got into it.
Bobby Lee
That's.
Tim Dillon
That this is the world we live in. And what do we learn today, truly? That if you're rich enough and you kill someone, you can get away with it. If you got a D. Shang.
Andrew Santino
It depends if you got an herb to come in with a nice suit.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. You know, we learned the title of this episode should be Somewhere in the Middle. The truth is Somewhere in the middle.
Andrew Santino
The truth lies somewhere in the middle.
Bobby Lee
The truth lies somewhere in the middle.
Andrew Santino
Because that's the way it is.
Bobby Lee
That's what it is.
Andrew Santino
That's the way life is.
Bobby Lee
That's the truth.
Andrew Santino
And that's what I would. I would. I think that we should remember with.
Tim Dillon
Diddy, the truth lies somewhere in the middle.
Andrew Santino
Well, that's what I'd. That. That's what we should all. And that's. By the way, I wouldn't even try to say innocence. If I was his lawyer, that's where I'd go. I'd go. I wouldn't even go, like, anything. Because that's never gonna happen. Right?
Bobby Lee
Yeah. Yeah.
Andrew Santino
So I get up there, I go, listen, is it as bad as they say? No. Was it great? Not great.
Bobby Lee
You're a great.
Andrew Santino
No, I'm telling you, you're a great defense.
Bobby Lee
Defense.
Andrew Santino
I would have been a great defense attorney.
Bobby Lee
Wow.
Andrew Santino
I would have said, listen, none of this is great. I'm not here to tell you that this was great. What I'm here to tell you.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. Is that I'm a jury. I'm jury.
Andrew Santino
It's not nearly as bad as what they're saying. And like many things in life. And I would say to you, pay attention. And say, please pay attention.
Bobby Lee
I would say, when I'm looking at the sky, you're thinking, contemplated.
Andrew Santino
Okay.
Bobby Lee
All right.
Andrew Santino
I would take me a while to learn that and trust that.
Bobby Lee
All right, let's try. Start. Oh, you want to start? Start over. We're jury.
Tim Dillon
Yeah, we are.
Andrew Santino
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I'm here representing Mr. Combs, and I'm going to tell you this. Am I going to stand up here and tell you that this was great? No, I'm not going to say it was great. No. But was it as bad as all these people are saying? No. Like many things in life, the truth lies. Somewhere in the middle. Oh, that's life. People have parties. Things get out of hand. No, it takes a lot of people to bake. I don't know what the exact term is, but the point is that cake. Yeah.
Tim Dillon
Can't speak on the joke.
Andrew Santino
I would actually kind of like that. Yeah, I like the kind of cherry. I kind of want a crowd work cherry. Like a give and take.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. Yeah.
Andrew Santino
But I would say. I would say before you go into deliberate cakes, before you. Thank you. Thank you. Well, now it sounds like he's just being disrespectful to me.
Tim Dillon
He's yelling cake at this guy.
Andrew Santino
It just sounds like you're being rude.
Tim Dillon
I bet this guy likes cake.
Andrew Santino
It sounds like you're being a little rude.
Bobby Lee
Okay.
Andrew Santino
But I'm not going to motion for you to be dismissed. What I'm going to say is this. When you are deliberating, I want you to remember that this is a person.
Tim Dillon
Wow.
Andrew Santino
This is a person with children. This is a person with children and a career. And this is a person who is more than the sum of his worst acts. Okay. Wow. He's more than the sum of his worst acts.
Tim Dillon
Let's deliberate. What do you think?
Bobby Lee
Not guilty?
Tim Dillon
No, he's guilty.
Andrew Santino
Yeah, but he'll be guilty. He'll be guilty.
Bobby Lee
I can be swayed so easily. Also in the bad jury. Oh, no, Guilty.
Tim Dillon
What is it called? A hang jury. That would be because of you.
Andrew Santino
But what's great about the defense attorneys is when they lose, they go on CNN and CNN's like, what happened? And the defense attorney goes, he's a rapist. Oh, right, right.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
He's a terrible person. Right out.
Tim Dillon
It's like, what did you want me to do? I was making money.
Andrew Santino
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
Wow. That was very intriguing. Compelling.
Andrew Santino
I was. That's how I would do it.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. I would also go into, if I may.
Andrew Santino
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
Into like. We've all been at parties.
Andrew Santino
Right.
Bobby Lee
We've acted a fool.
Tim Dillon
No, that's your defense.
Bobby Lee
No, like, you know, I mean, I.
Tim Dillon
Think he's not going to hire you.
Bobby Lee
I'm at the firm.
Tim Dillon
We've all been to parties. Imagine the kid in a room of a law firm pitching ideas over how to.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, that's what I would pitch you. Like, you're the main lawyer. Yeah, Right. It's Dylan and, you know, I mean, Jewish guy. That's what the name of the firm.
Andrew Santino
Dylan. Jewish guy, smart.
Tim Dillon
Well, because it rotates.
Bobby Lee
It rotates. Who knows?
Andrew Santino
You know, who knows who's going, so.
Bobby Lee
I'm working at Dylan. Jewish Guy. And I'm. I'm like, well, we could talk about, like, you know, people get drunk at parties and they. They make mistakes, too, no.
Andrew Santino
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, I'm going to say, what about people who went to the parties, had a completely great time, right? Bring them out.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
How about we bring out a bunch of people that went to the parties and weren't assaulted?
Tim Dillon
Interview Big Sean, Bring him in.
Andrew Santino
About that.
Bobby Lee
How about me asking. Me ask this question. I'm like, what is assault?
Andrew Santino
Well, also, what is human trafficking? What is.
Bobby Lee
That's very. I'm right.
Andrew Santino
What is the whole point?
Bobby Lee
What is it?
Andrew Santino
What are you even saying?
Bobby Lee
Okay.
Andrew Santino
What do you. What is that?
Bobby Lee
Okay. Okay.
Tim Dillon
I feel like you're hired at the firm, dude.
Bobby Lee
I'm Dylan and Jewish guy.
Tim Dillon
I'm Dylan and Jewish guy, dude.
Bobby Lee
That would be a great law firm, by the way.
Tim Dillon
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
You would be like, yeah, I'll take that.
Andrew Santino
But what you really got to do, what they really actually have to do is go and go. The people coming out against him right now are all hoping for compensation. Where have they been? Where have they been? This has been happening for decades, and nobody said anything.
Tim Dillon
That's how they pissed off.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
Oh, they. Oh, they just. Oh, like all these people in Scientology. Oh, they just figured it all out. Lee Remini, you rat. They're all rats. And I go, oh, you all figured it out now?
Bobby Lee
Liars.
Andrew Santino
Oh, they were. They're trying to get money from this client of mine.
Bobby Lee
Wow.
Andrew Santino
Who is a Christian man.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, very.
Tim Dillon
The Christian lean is always good.
Andrew Santino
Always.
Tim Dillon
Christian lean's good.
Bobby Lee
Would you rather be a prosecutor or a defense attorney?
Tim Dillon
I would rather be a prosecutor. I feel like I'm a prosecutor.
Andrew Santino
I think. You are a prosecutor.
Tim Dillon
Yeah.
Bobby Lee
What am I? What am I?
Tim Dillon
You're a defense attorney for sure.
Andrew Santino
I think. Well, here's what I think is interesting.
Tim Dillon
Your mumble, bumble, scrambled eggs. You're a defense attorney. You come in all sloppily late.
Andrew Santino
I. You do something brilliant. Like there was a guy like, you do. There was this crate. This woman, Dana Goldblatt. She was attorney. I was a juror on a murder trial. Murder, murder, torture and rape. Literally.
Tim Dillon
Holy wow.
Andrew Santino
And we convicted him. He was. He did the wrong. He killed his baby mom and all that.
Tim Dillon
That's her. Dana Goldblatt?
Andrew Santino
Yeah. So she was an attorney now, which. Oh, is that her? Yeah, yeah.
Bobby Lee
That's got to be.
Andrew Santino
Look, so she defended this guy, and she would wear these wacky outfits like Ms. Frizzle on the magic school bus.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
And you would end up staring at this outfits all day and not listening to the thing.
Bobby Lee
Oh, wow.
Andrew Santino
So like, I think you could do a fun, right gag where you're like the prosecutors up there doing something and you're doing something very distracting.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. Even some of my language. I wouldn't even talk. I would say something a new.
Tim Dillon
My cousin Vinnie.
Bobby Lee
I would go to the jury, go, hey.
Andrew Santino
Yes.
Bobby Lee
Yeah.
Andrew Santino
Because they're going, did he say hello? Yeah, yeah. That's the whole thing.
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Andrew Santino
And then it's who cares who raped her? No, I get it.
Bobby Lee
And I would say something witty like, I just had some kombucha.
Andrew Santino
Yeah, right.
Bobby Lee
Like.
Andrew Santino
No.
Bobby Lee
For breakfast.
Andrew Santino
And dance.
Bobby Lee
Like it would dance season kombucha.
Tim Dillon
You bring in your kava.
Andrew Santino
Yeah, you gotta like dance a little too, right?
Bobby Lee
I did, yeah.
Andrew Santino
Where did they say he hit her?
Bobby Lee
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, dude. You got me, dude. I think I'd be a very good defensive.
Tim Dillon
You'd be a great.
Bobby Lee
Can you imagine Dylan, Jewish guy Lee.
Andrew Santino
By the way, can you imagine if you were going like, like if you were charged with murder and you looked at the two people defending you and it was me and Bobby.
Bobby Lee
Oh my.
Andrew Santino
God, I have my sunglasses on and a red nose. You're like, what is going on with this?
Bobby Lee
Yeah, I'm just like, yeah, kombucha, baby.
Tim Dillon
Dancing in with your cava, baby.
Bobby Lee
Yeah. Well, what do you want to. You want to plug dates?
Andrew Santino
No, I don't care.
Tim Dillon
No.
Andrew Santino
I mean, they're on the website. Come see me.
Tim Dillon
Come see them live.
Bobby Lee
But also one of the funniest guys on planet earth.
Andrew Santino
Thank you very much. Watch if you want to watch it on Netflix. It's October 1st. Thank you guys for having me. I'm glad we finally did this. Thank you.
Bobby Lee
And it give Tim Dillon. Oh, thank you for being a bad friend. Tim Dillon, everybody. That was so party.
Title: Bad Friends Podcast Episode Featuring Tim Dillon – Detailed Summary
Hosts: Bobby Lee & Andrew Santino
Guest: Tim Dillon
Episode Length: Approximately 1 hour and 26 minutes
Release Date: [Insert Release Date]
In this episode of Bad Friends, hosts Bobby Lee and Andrew Santino welcome renowned comedian Tim Dillon as their special guest. The trio delves into a myriad of topics ranging from celebrity mishaps and personal anecdotes to upcoming live events, all infused with their signature humor and candid banter.
Timestamp: [01:56] – [02:40]
Bobby Lee kicks off the episode by promoting their upcoming live show titled "Scary Times USA," scheduled for October 24th at 6 PM PST. Tim Dillon provides additional details, highlighting exclusive merchandise and an interactive VIP afterparty available for active Patreon members.
Bobby Lee ([01:56]):
"That we're live streaming October 24th at 6pm on moment.co bad friends. It's gonna be awesome, guys."
Tim Dillon ([02:25]):
"We're live streaming it, so join us. Moment.co Bad Friends. We'll also be hosting an interactive VIP afterparty after the show."
Timestamp: [06:00] – [08:04]
Tim Dillon introduces the topic of Dave Navarro texting Bobby Lee following an onstage altercation with Perry Farrell. The discussion explores the dynamics of celebrity interactions and the aftermath of public disputes.
Tim Dillon ([06:00]):
"He looks like he's juiced up. Look at he's pissed off."
Andrew Santino ([07:30]):
"What's the point of a bathrobe?"
The hosts humorously dissect the situation, reflecting on Navarro's possible intentions and the broader implications of such incidents in the entertainment industry.
Timestamp: [19:50] – [22:16]
The conversation shifts to the tragic accident on the set of "Rust," where Alec Baldwin inadvertently killed a crew member. The group debates Baldwin's future in Hollywood and the repercussions of the incident.
Tim Dillon ([20:00]):
"You think you know why you're doing this. He's doing this because one day he. This accident could easily happen to him."
Andrew Santino ([20:26]):
"He was kind of like, frustrated. Like, what is this?"
Bobby Lee and Andrew Santino discuss the gravity of the situation, the media's portrayal of Baldwin, and whether he can recover his standing in the industry.
Timestamp: [37:47] – [44:12]
Tim Dillon introduces his new Netflix talk show, aiming to revive the classic Jerry Springer format with contemporary twists. The hosts express excitement and discuss the challenges of creating a modern talk show.
Andrew Santino ([37:54]):
"We came up with the idea of basically going, like, why don't we just do like a talk show like we grew up with, but with modern problems."
Bobby Lee ([38:00]):
"Absolutely. Because if you go to the convention and do the chat things that's already on YouTube."
The trio elaborates on their vision for the show, emphasizing authenticity and addressing modern societal issues through a humorous lens.
Timestamp: [55:00] – [62:32]
Andrew Santino shares his harrowing experience acting in a scene from "Joker," directed by Joaquin Phoenix. He recounts the difficulties of memorizing lines, handling intense on-set environments, and interactions with seasoned actors.
Andrew Santino ([55:00]):
"This was one of the worst experiences of my entire life."
Bobby Lee ([64:00]):
"How do you know her?"
The hosts discuss the complexities of acting in high-stress situations and the learning curve associated with transitioning from podcast hosting to on-screen performances.
Timestamp: [69:00] – [72:06]
Bobby Lee recounts a funny yet embarrassing incident at The Laugh Factory where he unintentionally broke comedian Jamie Masada's foot during a performance. The story highlights the unpredictable nature of live comedy shows.
Bobby Lee ([69:02]):
"I broke his fucking foot."
Tim Dillon ([70:02]):
"He can't get through a line in a fight club."
Andrew Santino and Tim Dillon add their perspectives, sharing their own experiences with unexpected moments in comedy clubs and the importance of maintaining composure.
Timestamp: [74:00] – [81:00]
The latter part of the episode features playful and spontaneous conversations, including impersonations, exaggerated stories, and light-hearted teasing among the trio. Highlights include Bobby Lee's theatrical attempt to act as a defense attorney and humorous takes on various scenarios.
Andrew Santino ([75:11]):
"This is a person with children. This is a person with children and a career."
Bobby Lee ([80:02]):
"I'm Dylan and Jewish guy."
These exchanges showcase the hosts' chemistry and ability to keep the conversation lively and entertaining.
This episode of Bad Friends offers a blend of humor, personal stories, and insightful discussions. From tackling serious topics like celebrity accidents to sharing light-hearted comedy club antics, Bobby Lee, Andrew Santino, and Tim Dillon create an engaging and entertaining listening experience. Their dynamic interplay ensures that listeners are both amused and entertained throughout the episode.
Bobby Lee ([03:05]):
"It's astonishing to me how fat I've gotten."
Tim Dillon ([06:00]):
"He looks like he's juiced up. Look at he's pissed off."
Andrew Santino ([19:50]):
"He's probably done."
Andrew Santino ([37:22]):
"No one's going to like everybody, you know?"
Andrew Santino ([55:00]):
"This was one of the worst experiences of my entire life."
Bobby Lee ([69:02]):
"I broke his fucking foot."
Andrew Santino ([75:17]):
"He's more than the sum of his worst acts."
Tim Dillon ([80:03]):
"We're jury, that's how I would do it."
These quotes encapsulate key moments and sentiments expressed during the episode, providing listeners with memorable insights into the hosts' perspectives and experiences.
Note: This summary focuses solely on the main content of the episode, excluding advertisements, intros, outros, and non-content segments, as per the provided instructions.