Join Malcolm and Simone Collins as they dive deep into the pitfalls of extreme manosphere ideology, the “wife guy” meme, and the real dynamics of modern relationships. This episode explores the breakdowns of high-profile marriages, the dangers of performative masculinity, and the importance of emotional control and partnership in marriage. With personal anecdotes, cultural analysis, and a touch of humor, Malcolm and Simone challenge toxic narratives and offer practical advice for building healthy, functional relationships.

Malcolm Collins: [00:00:00] the way in which women reduce you and all of your creative and adventurous impulses and render you to a headless quote unquote husband. The ideal husband has put aside in his ideals, all dangerous ideas. The meme term for this is the wife guy. I have seen many men who are already quite mediocre in spirit, debase themselves to a level of slavery for their wives and children. But the point here being is he sees this wholesome marriage and I think many people downstream of the manosphere and everything like that have come to see a wholesomeness, like a wholesome, sweet loving couple as, as a form of humiliation. They, they see it as humiliating to the man because it’s not what Andrew Tate sold them masculinity was.

Would you like to know more?

Malcolm Collins: Hello. I am excited to be here today. Today we are gonna be going over how some people are so red pilled, they cut themselves. And it is. A problem that I see [00:01:00] consistently within parts of the manosphere where individuals develop an idea of manhood and what it means to be a man, which is incompatible with tolerable women wanting to be married to you.

Simone Collins: Tolerable. That’s the key point. Tolerable women,

Malcolm Collins: right? And so, they’ll, they’ll, they’ll go out there and they’ll just be like, women are always like a drain on their husband and like, make their lives worse. And I’m like, like, clearly that’s not the case. Like you’ve, you’re an awesome wife. You, you do way more of both your share of the professional and housework.

You you know, are pregnant with kid number five right now, which you do with a plum. You’re only worried when the kids might have some sort of health issue or anything. You, you know, cook meals with family like clearly, and people hear her talk. She doesn’t, she. You do nag me. I, I will say you do nag me.

Not a lot more recently. But not in a way that’s like her trimester

Simone Collins: doesn’t yield great emotional control if we’re this year, yeah. I remember this from

Malcolm Collins: last time you were [00:02:00] this, this pregnant and she’s really sorry. Yeah. And it really only happens when she has genuine justification, like she’s doing far more of the workload on something than I am.

Note here, , she just gave birth to our fifth kid who is Healthy Tex. , She is with Tex in the hospital yesterday. She gave birth to him, , by her fifth C-section. So very dangerous surgery. We’re very, , grateful that it all went well. , And I am at home playing with our oldest as she recovers in the hospital.

So that’s how intense she is about this.

Malcolm Collins: But the point I’m making here is like, clearly good women exist, right? The problem is, is that if I acted the way that many of these manosphere influencers told me to act, women like Simone would not want to marry me or be around me. And so when these men say all women. Who exists like a wall or whatever, all winner like that have, you know, these, these character traits.

And I’m like, well, I don’t see that in the women that I’ve dated in the past or that [00:03:00] I’m married to. What they’re really saying is the way I act filters for women who act like this. And unfortunately, a lot of these ideas can come out of this, this wider community that we’re a part of. And lead to, we’re gonna go a bit into like

Steven Crowder’s marriage breakdown.

We’re gonna go a bit into Laura Southern’s marriage breakdown. Oh boy. We’re, we’re gonna go a but we’re gonna go all at this from the framing device of an essay. By deep at left analysis, which is a extensively a left wing guy.

But when you begin to hear this article, you will immediately be like, that sounds not leftist at all to me. So like culturally, it’s clear where this came from and I think it’s one of the best examples of this, where he literally argues that he’s gay for like manos fear reasons.

Simone Collins: So he’s the political lesbian of men of, [00:04:00]

Malcolm Collins: I guess, yes.

Simone Collins: That’s crazy. Okay, we gotta get into this. ‘cause I didn’t, I don’t know. I, I figured that women would be political lesbians because in general women are more attracted to dominance versus submissions and care relatively to men, a lot less about primary and secondary sexual characteristics, whereas men are a lot more sensitive to that.

So I just thought like, well, women are political lesbians because they can be. But, but,

Malcolm Collins: but here, what you’ll see, and you’ll hear in what he’s saying is within like the Bronze Age pervert sort of a mindset or something like that. Mm-hmm. He’s signaling something to our community that you would understand is sort of like a, you know, gorilla punching his chest, being like, I, I so manly.

I know words. I know how to say them. And it only works for signaling your status to other men. It repels women. And yet people misunderstand and think that this is actually the way they need to be acting or talking about women. Tra [00:05:00] women are materialists, but I also know if that he’s kind of right about stuff.

Simone Collins: Well, you can be right and end up being a cupped Yes. Political gay man. But continue. So trad women are materialists in the lowest sense of the word. Their goal in life is to identify a worthy male and then browbeat him into submission psychologically abuse him, neuter him, and castrate him. This is a very practical thing to do and a very safe and produces an effective slave society, but is devoid of idealism and heroism.

Malcolm Collins: Modern gaze are a radical extension of this feminine drive towards practical materialism. You see what I mean when I say he comes off as very right wing? Do, he really says he’s left wing again. What well sake about this, he’s attacking trad women here, right? Like he’s saying that trad women are materialists in the lowest sense of the word.

Their goal is to identify a worthy male, then browbeat him into submission. And for many trad women. [00:06:00] Yeah. That’s kind of what they are looking for. They’re not looking for a man they can empower, but a man that they can, in a way, enslave.

Simone Collins: Enslave. Yeah.

Malcolm Collins: When I say trad women, he again, quoting him here. When I say trad women, I’m referring to Steven Crowder’s ex-wife, who claims that the highest duty of a man is to marry a woman and then do whatever she says.

Ms. Crowder is a parody of the trad woman, but she is only saying aloud what many trad women secretly already believe. So what did she actually say? Because first, you know, I wanna get the, the actual information here

Simone Collins: from the horse’s mouth.

Malcolm Collins: She posted on Twitter. The most alpha thing a man can do is marry and be faithful to a good woman for the entirety of his life and be willing to storm the greats of hell to stay married to her.

This was in response to a video by conservative commentator Matt Walsh, discussing marriage as supernatural generated significant backlash and discussion on X. We as many users, interpreting it as promoting an overly sacrificial and one-sided view of men’s role in marriage, though it does [00:07:00] not, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

The, the point here being is she does appear to basically think that and a lot of people are aware of the Crowder and his wife breaking up, but I wanted to start talking about them to be like, this is the type of woman that a man who acts and presents like Crowder is able to, and keep in mind, Crowder is the height.

Of what this type of man is, right? Like presumably he’s gonna have his pick of the litter in terms of, of, of women who will tolerate a man like this. So if you are the very best of what this community can achieve, your outcome, and, and keep in mind that the alternative understanding here is, is Steven Crowder’s is just not a good guy or good husband, which may be the case.

We’ll get into that. But I think that many of his flaws as a partner came downstream of trying to emulate the philosophy of the red pill and [00:08:00] traditionalist version of what a male is. In a way that doesn’t work within a modern context. And it’s very important that we do not do that. Like our goal is not to signal to other people in the manosphere how tough and cool we are.

Our goal is to get married to somebody who wants to improve our lives and works every day to improve our lives and has lots of kids

Simone Collins: more, more. Actually our goal first and foremost is to maximize something we believe has inherent value, and we choose to find a partner because we understand that if you find the right kind of partner and form the right kind of relationship, you will be more collectively effective at maximizing that thing or that collection of things that you value than you would on your own.

Mm-hmm. It’s not even that your goal is to find a wife.

Malcolm Collins: Yeah.

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