Episode Overview
Podcast: Bawdy Storytelling
Host: Dixie De La Tour
Episode: 39: “Adventures with Officer Andy” (Adam Ross)
Date: September 12, 2018
This episode features storyteller Adam Ross recounting a pivotal experience that challenged his need for control and introduced him to new realms of sex, power play, and trust. The story takes listeners through the humorous, poignant, and explicit details of Adam's adventures with “Football Mike” and the unexpected visit from “Officer Andy.” True to Bawdy’s ethos, the tale is candid, explicit, and transformative, exploring authenticity and vulnerability in sexual storytelling.
Key Discussion Points and Insights
1. Setting the Scene and Opening Up (03:53–06:40)
- Adam frames his story: He’s lying in bed, sweaty, after hours of great sex—alone, or so he thinks—when he spots an LAPD officer in the doorway.
- He rewinds to 2002, sharing that he and his long-term boyfriend have opened up their relationship, which feels risky and uncommon in their circle:
“They were all cheating on each other, but none of them had an open relationship.” (05:01, Adam Ross)
2. Navigating Online Hookups in the Early 2000s (06:41–08:30)
- Adam describes using pre-app internet platforms (AOL, Craigslist, Manhunt) to meet men in the days before apps like Tinder and Grindr.
- He finds a profile: “Football Mike,” a husky, southern ex-football player, whose confidence and candor draw Adam in.
3. Embracing Sexual Adventure and Letting Go (08:31–12:48)
- Adam, often the “top” and usually in control, is intrigued by Mike’s dominance and willingness to talk dirty.
- The sexual chemistry is immediate and electrifying, changing Adam’s views on submission, trust, and pleasure:
“It had gone from black and white to color, and I didn’t even know before that it was only black and white.” (10:13, Adam Ross)
- Adam and Mike become regular “fuck buddies,” a dynamic that’s exhilarating and, at times, intimidating.
4. The “Officer Andy” Encounter (12:49–16:42)
- Climax of the story: After another intense session with Mike, there’s a knock. Adam expects the mailman—but is confronted instead by a real LAPD officer, Andy, in full uniform.
- The scene blurs the lines of fantasy and reality—Andy is no stripper; he’s a real cop, and he’s packing (in every sense).
- Adam is hesitant but swept up in the moment and, ultimately, loses himself in the experience, surrendering control in a way he’s never done before:
“I am just out-of-control lost, and I’m loving it.” (14:57, Adam Ross)
- In a comical, memorable post-coital moment, Officer Andy wipes off his soiled zipper, quipping:
“Oh, the guys are gonna tease me about this so hard back at the station.” (16:04, Officer Andy as recalled by Adam Ross)
5. The Aftermath and Personal Growth (16:43–17:01)
- Mike and Adam debrief, laughing about the unpredictability of sex and life.
- Adam reflects on the bigger lesson:
“The result [of always trying to stay in control] was not that I had control. The result was that control had me, and it was killing off the fun and possibilities and magic that could happen in life.” (16:47, Adam Ross)
- He credits Mike (and Andy) with helping him embrace vulnerability, play, and possibility.
Memorable Quotes & Moments
-
On being in control:
“All that time in life, I spent all this energy always trying to stay in control... but the result was that control had me.” (16:47, Adam Ross)
-
On Mike’s effect:
“It was like kryptonite – there was just nothing I was gonna be able to do to resist that.” (09:08, Adam Ross)
-
On Officer Andy’s uniform:
“This is not like Strippergram Cop. This is an actual cop in his LAPD navy blue uniform, you know, and he’s got the Tom Selleck mustache, and he looks like Jon Hamm kinda.” (12:57, Adam Ross)
-
On letting go:
“There will always be a little bit of Football Mike in me, not to mention Officer Andy.” (17:01, Adam Ross)
Timestamps for Important Segments
| Timestamp | Segment | |-----------|--------------------------------------------| | 03:53 | Adam begins his story | | 06:41 | Describing online hookup culture of 2002 | | 08:31 | First hookup with Football Mike | | 12:49 | Officer Andy enters—scene with real LAPD cop| | 16:43 | Aftermath and Adam’s revelation about control| | 17:01 | Story concludes |
Tone & Style
- Candid, humorous, explicit: Adam’s storytelling is frank and self-aware, laced with both humor and vulnerability.
- Sex-positive, nonjudgmental: The host and storytellers celebrate sexual adventures without shame.
- Transformational: The story emphasizes that sexual exploration can lead to personal growth, not just pleasure.
Final Thoughts
Adam Ross’s story, “Adventures with Officer Andy,” perfectly encapsulates the spirit of Bawdy Storytelling—funny, risqué, insightful, and deeply human. Listeners walk away entertained, but also challenged to consider the role of control, vulnerability, and surprise in their own lives.
Listen if you enjoy:
- Raw, honest, funny sex stories
- Reflections on queer identity and sexual discovery
- Personal narratives that highlight transformation through pleasure
Notable Quote to Sum Up the Episode:
“Control had me, and it was killing off the fun and possibilities and magic that could happen in life.” – Adam Ross (16:47)
