Episode 47: ‘Butthole to the Lord’ (Matt Lieb)

Summary

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Bawdy Storytelling, Episode 47: ‘Butthole to the Lord’ (Matt Lieb)

Released: November 8, 2018
Host: Dixie De La Tour | Main Storyteller: Matt Lieb

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Episode Overview

In this raunchy, unapologetic, and hilarious episode from Bawdy Storytelling—the “Moth for pervs”—comedian Matt Lieb takes the stage at San Francisco Sketchfest with an unabashed coming-of-age(ish) tale about the holy grail of youthful sexual exploration: autofellatio, aka sucking his own dick. Matt’s candid storytelling, laced with both humor and unexpected reflection, makes for a gleefully awkward romp through adolescence, self-discovery, and the creative heights (and depths) of masturbation. Host Dixie De La Tour sets the scene and brings context for this unique “flexible” achievement, and following Matt’s tale, shares further sex-positive anecdotes and listener engagement.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

Celebration of Sex-Positive, Honest Storytelling

• Dixie introduces the podcast’s roots: real sexual stories told live, not sanitized or rehearsed (“…honest-to-badness story time with true sexcapades and poignant, hilarious, transformational tales at each and every show.” [01:01])
• Sets tone: adult, explicit, but inclusive and liberatory.

Introducing Matt Lieb (03:25)

• Extensive comedy résumé and connection to the Bay Area stand-up scene.
• Described as “a whole bunch of other stuff…used to live in San Francisco, where I live, where he was named one of the best comedians of the Bay Area.” [01:01]

Matt Lieb’s Story: The Quest for Autofellatio

The Universality of Masturbation and Orgasm

• Matt begins by riffing on the shared, awkward truths of teenage masturbation:

  • “Let’s talk about orgasms. You guys enjoy orgasms? Me too. Love it.” [03:25–03:32]

• Jealousy of Female Orgasms:

  • “I am jealous of female orgasms…I feel like female orgasms are like…a painting…male orgasm is the most basic thing in the world…when a woman comes…it was like a Mondrian composition during his Blue Period. And when men come, it’s just like a Garfield cartoon…it’s just like, ‘I hate Mondays.’” [04:45–05:20]

Cataloguing Creative Adolescent Masturbation

• Matt shares a candid—and comedic—list of household objects he’s used for masturbation (banana peels, hot dog buns, turkey basters, Barbie dolls, bagels—“provided my own schmear,” etc.) [05:40–07:00]
• Memorable digression: Attempt on a Big Mouth Billy Bass singing novelty fish toy (“I did not rape a fish…this was a robotic singing fish…you would press it and its mouth would move…drop me in the— I never learned the second verse because I fucked it in the mouth.” [07:03–07:37])

The “Holy Grail”: Sucking His Own Dick

• “But that’s not what tonight’s story is about. No, tonight’s story is about the holy grail of masturbation. My mouth. Autofellatio. I’m going to tell you about the time that I successfully sucked my own dick.” [07:40–08:00]

• On Universal Male Curiosity:

  • “Every single dude in here, down to the last man, has tried to suck their own dick. It is impossible not to. Do not judge us, ladies.” [08:10–08:23]

Rigorous, Almost Heroic Practice

• Matt frames his mission as both adolescent inevitability and spiritual quest:

  • “It’s about, you know, the triumph of the human spirit and the flexibility of the human spine.” [08:35]
  • “I spent a year of training, like Rocky. But a really sad Rocky.” [09:04]

• Emphasizes his self-imposed outsider status as a short, chubby seventh grader—vision of autofellatio as escape from the pressures of dating or growing up. [09:25–09:55]

• Yoga as Masturbatory Training

  • “I learned about this thing that my mom did called yoga, which is a very magical, spiritual thing. It is also basically training for sucking your own dick.” [10:35]
  • Discovers “halasana,” the plow pose—“your butthole basically just facing the ceiling, all right? You know, eye to the Lord.” [11:10]

• Persistent trial-and-error over a school year, using gravity and flexibility, until perfection is achieved at last. [11:10–11:45]

The Triumphant (but Complicated) Moment

• Vivid description of finally achieving his goal:

  • “I got into the position, you know, butthole to the Lord, and immediately my dick just flopped right there. And this was a scary moment because…I can suck this dick.” [12:05–12:35]

• Honest reflection about crossing the line into new sexual territory and self-doubt:

  • “Am I crossing some sort of line here, a barrier? …I decide I’m not doing this for me. I’m doing this for God. I’m doing this for science.” [12:35–12:50]

• Punchline, Unexpected Self-Discovery:

  • “As someone who has successfully sucked his own cock before, what they don’t tell you is that it feels less like having your dick sucked and more like just sucking some dude’s dick, which for me just made me even more horny. And I came immediately in my own mouth and—well, I’m now kind of attracted to dicks.” [13:05–13:32]

Audience Reactions: Laughter, applause, palpable sense of “I can’t believe this just happened” camaraderie.

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Host (Dixie de La Tour)’s Follow-Up

Dixie’s Commentary on Autofellatio (17:12+)

• Confirmation that Matt’s story isn’t unique—she knows a “few” men who can perform autofellatio.

• Tells a behind-the-scenes tale from Camp John Waters, referencing a bisexual man (“Kevin”) who can autofellate (and does so "forward" rather than "backflip" style)—emphasizing that there are “multiple ways.” [18:00–20:19]

• Memorable moment: Kevin’s erotic, comedic dirty talk—“God, you smell like my friend’s apartment. Isn’t that hot?” [19:25]

• Expresses a desire to share an audio recording of Kevin’s performance (pending permission), underscoring the show’s ethos of curiosity and learning.

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Highlighted Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On male vs. female orgasm:
  “When men come, it’s just like a Garfield cartoon...it's just like, 'I hate Mondays.' That’s how we come.” – Matt Lieb [05:15]

• On autoerotic exploration:
  “As a man, you’re just like, if it’s got a hole, I’m a fuck it.” – Matt Lieb [06:00]

• The universal quest:
  “Every dude in here has tried to suck their own dick, by the way...It’s impossible not to.” – Matt Lieb [08:12]

• On flexibility and triumph:
  “It’s about, you know, the triumph of the human spirit and the flexibility of the human spine.” – Matt Lieb [08:35]

• Pivotal moment (successful autofellatio):
  “I got into the position, you know, butthole to the Lord, and immediately my dick just flopped right there...I have to think…am I really doing this?”
  – Matt Lieb [12:05]

  “I’m not doing this for me. I’m doing this for God. I’m doing this for science.”
  – Matt Lieb [12:50]

  “It feels less like having your dick sucked and more like just sucking some dude’s dick, which for me just made me even more horny. And I came immediately in my own mouth...”
  – Matt Lieb [13:17]

• Dixie’s sex-positive wrap-up:
  “Wasn’t that an amazing story? So, I’m not sure about you, but I’ve known quite a few guys who could suck their own dick...while I’m not really sure that’s how you win a blowjob contest, but I humored him.”
  – Dixie de La Tour [17:37, 18:07]

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Important Timestamps

• [03:25] — Matt Lieb begins his story; focus on first orgasms.
• [05:40] — Matt lists unusual masturbation exploits.
• [08:10] — The quest for autofellatio starts in earnest.
• [10:35] — Discovery of yoga as a tool for self-sucking.
• [12:05] — Climactic moment: “butthole to the Lord.”
• [13:17] — Realization: “less like having your dick sucked…more like just sucking some dude’s dick…came immediately in my own mouth…kind of attracted to dicks.”
• [17:12] — Dixie’s reflective segment on autofellatio.
• [19:25] — Epic dirty-talk moment: “You smell like my friend’s apartment.”
• [25:24] — Play-out: “Enormous Penis” by Da Vinci’s Notebook (thematic musical choice).

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Episode Tone & Style

• Unfiltered, humorous, self-deprecating storytelling.
• Open celebration of diverse sexual journeys—awkwardness included.
• Dixie’s hosting is warm, inclusive, and just as explicit as needed.
• Overall, invites laughter, empathy, and a sense of shared secret history.

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Takeaways

• Masturbation, sexual curiosity, and even strange personal “milestones” are more universal—and more laugh-out-loud funny—than most people admit.
• Kids (and adults) will go to ridiculous lengths in pursuit of pleasure…sometimes with unexpected results.
• There’s wisdom in honesty, and humor in the raw mechanics of self-discovery.
• Flexible? There might be more than one way to achieve “butthole to the Lord”—just ask around.

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“It’s about… the triumph of the human spirit and the flexibility of the human spine.”
—Matt Lieb [08:35]

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Transcript

[Dixie de La Tour]

Hey there. Here's the thing. It's very important that you be of the age of consent and that you be wanting to hear these stories because these can be some dirty, dirty stories. So get your grandma out of the room, make sure there's no kids around. Let's go. All of my life I've never fit But I won't complain and I won't quit. I am enormous.

[Matt Lieb]

Get used to it.

[Dixie de La Tour]

Everyone tells me I'm too much Maybe it's just you're not enough for me can't you see I'm the kind of.

[Kevin]

Woman I'm supposed to be?

[Dixie de La Tour]

Hey. My vagina is eight miles wide. Absolutely everyone can come inside. If you're ever frightened, just run and hide. My vagina is eight miles. Hi there. I am sexual folklorist Dixie de La Tour, and you are listening to the Bawdi Storytelling podcast, the original sex and storytelling series that is quickly coming up on 12 years. We've got a special story for you this time. You know, there are some things that only a few people can do and the rest of us just sit back, gape with our mouths wide open and go, man, I wish I could do that. This week's story is one of those stories. Alright, let's talk about our storyteller for this episode. His name is Matt Lieb and he's a comedian, writer, actor and a whole bunch of other stuff in Los Angeles. He used to live in San Francisco, where I live, where he was named one of the best comedians of the Bay Area. He's performed at the Bridgetown Comedy Festival, San Francisco Sketchfest. He has been part of the 10,000 Laughs festival in Minneapolis. He's been featured on Viceland, on Hulu, on ciso, on Gabrielle Iglesias, Stand Up Revolution Radio on Sirius xm. And he's a correspondent on the Emmy nominated short form series the Star Wars Show. He's a writer and performer on Newsbroke and he's a writer for Audible's original series Bedtime Stories for Cynics with Nick Offerman. He's written for David Spade, Tommy Chong and so many more. I've had him on my stage a couple of times. This one is from our San Francisco Sketchfest Comedy Festival show. I was so thrilled when he came all the way from LA to perform for us. This storyteller is Matt Lieb.

[Kevin]

Keep it going for Dixie, everyone. Yeah. Woo. You guys ready to come? Yeah. Fuck yeah. Let's come. That'd be tired if we all just simultaneously came together right now. I do not have that power I never have. But I am so happy to be here. Guys, please, another round of applause for Dixie. Let her here. This is awesome. So today I am going to be talking about Cummings. We're gonna do it. Let's talk about orgasms. You guys enjoy orgasms? Me too. Love it. Do you remember your first orgasm? Me too. Not yours, mine. I loved it. I remember the first time I came, it was just that feeling where you're just like, oh, shit, I'm gonna do this all the time. Like, you know, I love it, man. I love. You know, they just. They feel so good. Although I am jealous of female orgasms, I think those are amazing, you guys. Who in here has had a female orgasm before?

[Dixie de La Tour]

Yeah.

[Kevin]

So jealous, man. Because male orgasms are so basic. I feel like female orgasms are like a. There's just like so many different feelings that go into it. It's like a painting, you know, Every single one is just like the color palette of feelings you have is incredible. Like, male orgasm is the most basic thing in the world. Like, when a woman comes, they're just like, oh, wow, that was new. That was like a Mondrian composition during his Blue Period. And when men come, it's just like a Garfield cartoon. Like, that's it, you know, it's just like, I hate Mondays. Like, that's how we come. But still, I love to do it. I love it. My story is going to be about masturbation, which I think is great. I love masturbation. Masturbation is an amazing thing. It's beautiful. It's a beautiful experience. It's a spiritual experience, you know, because it's just you and your body and you're alone. And when you're alone, no one can tell you to stop crying. You could just cry. They love it, man. It's a story about sexual exploration. When I was young, when I discovered masturbation, I was on the cutting edge of masturbation technology. You remember when you first realized you could do that and you were just like, I'm a fuck anything that's a hole. As a man, you're just like, if it's got a hole, I'm a fuck it. And I brought a list. Here's a list of things Matt Lieb has stuck his dick in. Banana peel. Hot dog bun. Sponge. Rubber glove sponge wrapped in a rubber glove. Socks. Oh, I fucked the toilet seat cover. Yeah. So it was like rubber, but, like, it was kind of puffy and, yeah. My own foot. Yeah. Did that. My size Barbie. It was my sister's Listen, it's not that gross. I was. It was about my size, so it's not weird. It was the first real doll bagel, which is the most Jewish thing I've ever done, provided my own smear that day. You know what I mean? You know what I mean? Boom. Let's see the. Oh, yeah. The bulb of a turkey baster. Just the bulb tub of that really thick eucerin cream. You just smash your dick into it. Pillow, bacon, vacuum. Normal stuff. The most ridiculous thing ever was. One day my dad brought home a thing. It was called a big mouth Billy bass. Before you go crazy, it was not an actual fish. I did not rape a fish. I'm not a monster. I know comedians have a bad reputation, but I am a pure soul. This was a robotic singing fish. It was a novelty gift. You guys remember, it had a button on it. You would press it and its mouth would move. It would sing that song, take me to the river. Drop me in the. I never learned the second verse because I it in the mouth. So it was. It was like, drop me in the. You know, drop me. Drop me in the spaceship. It was probably Spaceship. But that's not what tonight's story is about. No, tonight's story is about the holy grail of masturbation. My mouth. Otto Fellatio. I'm going to tell you about the time that I successfully sucked my own dick, because that's what body storytelling is. Who wants to fuck my mouth? No. All right. So I did. And, you know, I'm not embarrassed by it whatsoever. I don't find. There's no shame in it and everything. There's no shame. I think it's, you know, it's the Holy Grail, so to speak, for most men. We all try to fuck our own mouth holes. Every dude in here has tried to suck their own dick, by the way. If you're wondering. Every single dude in here, down to the last man, has tried to suck their own dick. It's impossible not to. Do not judge us, ladies. It is impossible not to. The way the penis is shaped, when it's fully erect, it literally points up at your mouth, just taunting you with its unsuckability. You're just like, no, please. Can never quite reach. He just looks at you with his little eye like, you'll never suck me. Don't even try. But that's what the story is about. It's about, you know, the triumph of the human spirit and the flexibility of the human spine. That's what it's about. See, I'VE always. It's something I'd always wanted to do is the Holy Grails, like, if I could do this. Because, you know, I just. I looked at it as, like, if I can do this, you know, I'm in seventh grade, okay? And I'm short, I'm chubby. My whole soul is like, you're never gonna fuck. So it's like, all you can do is. If you can figure this out, you're home free. You don't have to worry about dating. You don't have to worry about getting a job. You got a job, one job. You can survive off that. I always felt like if anyone could do it, then that's all they would do. It's like, you ever know someone who could do a backflip and think to yourself, like, if you can do that, why do you ever walk? Just backflip everywhere. It's badass. That's how I felt about the ability to suck my own dick. So I spent a year of training, like Rocky. But a really sad Rocky spent a year just like, okay, I gotta get this down. And. And I learned, all right, four minutes left. That means we gotta get to the fucking. And I tried to get to the fucking as fast as possible. But as you know, it's very, as you know, as you know, as you know, as we all know, very hard to suck your own dick. It's just there, but it's not quite there. So I learned, you know, I tried all sorts of different positions. One thing you can do, you can sit in a sink. For those of you who are, like, still holding out hope that in your old age, maybe now's the time, you won't be able to, but tell your children anyways. So, you know, I did the thing where I was in the sink and I was just. Couldn't quite reach it. I tried, you know, multiple different positions. Eventually, I learned about this thing that my mom did called yoga, which is a very magical, spiritual thing. It is also basically training for sucking your own dick. And so I was looking at a book of different positions, and I ran into one. It's called the halasana position. Now, if you don't know what it is, then you've never tried to suck your own dick before or you don't do yoga. What it is, is you are on your back, legs over your head. Your butthole is basically just facing the ceiling, all right? You know, eye to the Lord. And it arches your back in this way where you're using gravity in order to get that dick Very close. And I did this every day, every day, practice, practice, practice. And you know, how do you get to Carnegie Hall? Suck your own dick? No. And so, you know, I did this for months and months and months on end. It took a year, a school year really is what it was. But right at the beginning of summer, the summer that was leading in to eighth grade, it happened for me. Now I got closer and closer beforehand. The closest I got before this point was I could kiss the tip, which wasn't quite. It just wasn't there yet, you know, it wasn't the same. I don't know if you've ever kissed the glistening cumfield tip of a dick before. Not quite that fun. So I was almost there and then finally it happened. I had practiced for a long period of time and I was finally able to position. And I remember, I'll never forget the moment that it happened. I got into the position, you know, but hold to the Lord, and immediately my dick just flopped right there. And this was a scary moment because I was like, before this, you know, part of me was like, it's never going to happen, but it'd be fun to try it. Now I am face to face, head to head, if you will, with my own organ. And so, you know, and I have to think about it. I have to think like, okay, but am I really doing this? Am I crossing some sort of line here, A barrier? Because it's like, you know, once you're in middle school, you start learning about the, you know, heteronormative society. You start learning like, you know, guys like, guys like tits and skateboards and fucking professional wrestling, you know, oiled up men. So it's like, it's a confusing times for a middle schooler. And it's the first time I've ever been face to face with a dick before where I have like, I can suck this dick. So I decide I'm not doing this for me, doing this for God. I'm doing this for science, you know. And so I do it, ladies and gentlemen, I start fucking my own mouth. And let me tell you. Right, thank you. Yes. There was an applause break in my mind. And let me tell you, as someone who has successfully sucked his own cock before that, what they don't tell you is that it feels less like having your dick sucked and more like just sucking some dude's dick, which for me just made me even more horny. And I came immediately in my own mouth and I. Well, I'm now kind of attracted to dicks. All right, guys. I'VE been Matt Lieb. Thank you so much. Thank.

[Dixie de La Tour]

You. What you doing?

[Kevin]

You want to suck a dick? I could put the meat in your mouth.

[Dixie de La Tour]

Suck my wiggly dick. Put it in your mouth and let the meat slide down your throat hole.

[Kevin]

You suck my cock, but look out, because the balls will pop out of his mouth.

[Dixie de La Tour]

I'm very confident about one thing, that if you do.

[Kevin]

If you practice yoga, if you do.

[Dixie de La Tour]

The practice, it will enhance any other thing that you're doing in your life. Whatever your work is, whatever your job is, whatever your passion is, practice of yoga can enhance that. Wasn't that an amazing story? So I'm not sure about you, but I've known quite a few guys who could suck their own dick. Well, not quite a few, but definitely more than two or three. And you may have heard me talk about the fact that I just went to Camp John Waters back in September for the second year this year, and I threw the blowjob contest at Camp John Waters. At a certain point in the evening, somebody came up to me after the show to say it wasn't fair. They didn't know that the contest was happening when it was happening, and that they would have absolutely won because they could suck their own dick. While I'm not really sure that's how you win a blowjob contest, but I humored him. I'm gonna call him Kevin. So Kevin and I were talking the next morning at coffee, and we were talking about the fact that he had mentioned that he could suck his own dick. And I said, you know, I have friends who can suck their own dick. And they usually do it a certain way. Sort of a little bit of a backflip. Is that how you do it? And he goes, no, I do it forward. And I'm like, really? That's a really tough way to do it. He's standing there. This particular person, Kevin, is bisexual, and he's surrounded by really attractive gay men. He's sitting and talking to me and my friend Mishpin, who are female identified. And I say, kevin, is there any chance that you could show me how you suck your own dick? And he just launches into, oh, I. I can absolutely do it. And I'm like, yeah, I know. I believe you. I want to see. He says, well, I'm probably gonna need a boy for this. Which I think was a nice way of saying, I'm not interested in you, Dixie. Which was fine. I'm like, you got two boys. Are the boys willing to go with us? And they were. We went back to Kevin's cabin and went into his room. And at a certain point, I said, hey, Kevin, would it be okay if I audio recorded you in this whole process? Because I'm sure I'm gonna learn a few things and I like to learn things.

[Kevin]

Things.

[Dixie de La Tour]

And he said, well, if you put this on your podcast, you are going to have to list me under my. I believe it's his Russian porn name for the day when he does Russian porn. Maybe. He was on one bed in the cabin. My friend Mishpen and I were sitting on the other one, and he and two men are making out on the bed and had a very interesting style of talking dirty to them. He's grabbing on their dicks. He's grabbing on his own dick. He's getting really hard. He's about to suck his own dick. And he leans into the neck of one of the guys, I believe his name was Joe, and he starts making those sort of noises. And then he says one of the hottest things I've ever heard anybody say while they were in bed. He leans into Joe's neck and says, God, you smell like my friend's apartment isn't that hot. And maybe if you talk like that, you can suck your own dick. Who knows? I haven't figured out the, you know, scientific angle on this one yet, but I'm hoping that Kevin will give me permission and I'll be able to share that recording with you because it was really, really informative. I learned so much. Have you ever fallen madly in love with something like, for example, this podcast and then had it go away, and all you can do is go, oh, God, my life was so much better when I had that thing that felt like there was somebody out there just like me. And I had a way to connect with other people like me. I had a way to learn from those people. I had a way to hear their stories. Well, the way that you can do that is by going to patreon.com and supporting body storytelling. Podcasts and live shows. Live shows are a tough thing to make a living in. And I've added on podcasting, and podcasting is not my wheelhouse, y'. All. I am not that technically adept. I can talk, I can coach, I can host stories on stage. But the thing I'm not that great at is the tech part. And not only do I need to pay my tech staff, but I just went to Patricon, the Patreon conference down in la. I just got back from it and was in a room full of people who had this crazy idea that if you make something as an artist, maybe your own time is worth something too. I never think to ask you guys for that. And this podcast takes a lot of time. It's more than doubled the work that I'm doing every single month. I would love your help to keep it going. So go to patreon.com P-A-T-R-E-O-N.com Body B W D Y and give it whatever level you can. If you can give it $10 a month, I'd be a happy puppy. If you can give it more than that, tell me a reward you'd love to have. I'd love to work with you because I want to keep going. I've fallen in love with podcasting. I feel like I'm getting messages from you people who are like, telling me about your lives, telling me that this podcast is important to you too. So I need your help. I'm asking for it. And thanks for listening. Matt Lieb has inspired us to do something a little bit different on this episode. I was listening to his story again while I was getting ready, ready to share it with you, and it made me think of this oldie but goodie that I hadn't heard in a while, put it on, listened to it and went, oh yeah, I bet there's people out there who love this one as much as I do. And if they haven't ever heard it, you're going to be walking around in the grocery store for the next two weeks singing this and people are going to be giving you the side eye. If you've never heard of Da Vinci's Notebook, they are an acapella or were an acapella consortium who did these beautiful acapella songs. They later, at least part of them became Paul and Storm. I'm a huge Paul and Storm fan. I'm a Da Vinci's Notebook fan. I'm a Jonathan Coulton fan. Listen to Jonathan Coulton while I'm getting ready for the show all the time because he's got some great little dirty ditties. But we're talking about Da Vinci's Notebook here. This is a song that I love. I sing as I walk around the city of San Francisco. So imagine that and I hope you'll be doing the same thing when you hear it. This song is called Enormous Penis and it is from Da Vinci's Notebook.

[Matt Lieb]

Whenever life gets you down Keeps you wearing a frown and the gravy train has left you behind and when you're all out of hope down at the end of your rope and nobody's there to throw you a line if you ever get so low that you don't know which way to go Come on and take a walk in my shoes Never worry about a thing Got the world on a string Cause I've got my the cure for all of my blue love is loose I take a look at my enormous penis and my troubles start a melting away Bow. Bow. I take a look at my enormous penis and the happy times are coming to stay I gotta sing and I dance when I glance in my pants and the feeling's like a sunshiny day I take a look look at my enormous pess Everything is going my way My troubles started melting away I take a look at my enormous penis Saying the happy time are coming to stay. Yeah, I got great big amounts in the place where it counts I have the feeling's like a sunshiny day I take a look at my enormous Behaving is going my way. My cows are monster. Everything is going my way. My meat is harder. Everything is going my way.

[Kevin]

Size doesn't matter.

[Matt Lieb]

Everything is going my way.

[Dixie de La Tour]

Hey, let's talk about upcoming body storytelling live shows. Let's do that. Because I really like people in person. Podcasting is awesome, but it's not like looking at your face. You got an awful pretty face. So here's what's coming up really soon for Bodi. For example, this Friday, like any fucking day now in San Francisco, the theme is Packs a wallop. We have Ouchie the Clown, the founder of the porn compasse. He's a clown who walks around in a leather thong. And Doc Martens. He's all your childhood fears and all your grown up fears all rolled into one. And he's going to tell his origin story about the porn Compasse. We've also got Kingster, Nerene, Mechanique. We've got Best of Body storytelling winner a number of times, Matt Matthews, and even more. But here's the thing I really need to tell you about this Friday night in San Francisco. I'm bringing out my games and my games are the sort of thing that you really have to kind of go, this is going to be a rockin Friday night. I gotta bring my A game. We're gonna have OK Pervert, which is kind of like Craigslist casual encounters, but in person and analog. And you know, they're right there in the room because they wrote an ad right there in the room. We're gonna have bangle, of course we're gonna have Sniff test, which is a my pheromone dating game. Bring something you've worn in a Ziploc bag. Stuff will happen, I guarantee you. I was gonna say hilarity ensues, and hilarity is not the word I'm going for here, but it really stirs up the crowd. It's a fun way to interact with strangers sniffing their stuff. And we have a creature hole coming in from Seattle, Washington, for the very first time. I hope you will be with us in San Francisco for for Pax the Wallop on Friday, November 9th. Then on Wednesday, November 14th, I'm in Brooklyn with Risk. The Risk podcast and Kevin Allison have invited me back. They finished working on their book. It's gonna be available for sale and so Kevin and I love to get together and create collaboration shows. And it's been over a year, so you are gonna want to be at the Bell house on Wednesday, November 14th. We have an amazing lineup and Kevin Allison and I will both be telling stories. We also have the reformed whores, who are musicians that I have been wanting to meet forever because I love their music. You can get tickets to that [e-mail] and then on December 6th in Seattle, we're gonna have Naughty Bits. We're taking Seattle off so that we can go to Brooklyn. And then I will be back in Seattle with the Naughty Bits on December 6th. That's Thursday. I'm still taking story pitches, so if you'd like to be on stage in Seattle, send me your story. Dixieaudistorytelling.com I coach you. I get you ready. This is a curated show, so contact me as soon as you can. I want to have you on my stage. And then the last show of the year, December 13th in San Francisco. We need this so bad, y'.

[Kevin]

All.

[Dixie de La Tour]

The theme is happy endings. Taking pitches for that show as well. If you want to pitch me, it's really easy. Dixieaudistorytelling.com My most favorite way to get a story pitch, and this puts you at the top of the pile, is I want to hear you tell a story. So you turn on the voice memo on your phone, you just start talking to me. Don't worry about being pretty. Don't make it perfect. Just talk to me and say, hey, Dixie, here's this thing that happened to me. Together we make it stage worthy. So it changes your life to get on stage at Bodi. I know you want to do it. Those are the upcoming shows for Bodi Storytelling. You can find [e-mail] shows, and I really hope to see you at a live show soon. Well, you know, I like to say thank you. So I'm going to say thank you to the people who made this podcast episode possible. To my podcast producer, Marty Garcia, who is a fucking joy to work with. Guess what? We're an explicit podcast. I can say fucking if I want to. To Dana Hannah, who is my project manager. She's helping me get all these years of stories together to get them onto the podcast with you. To Joe Moore, who's my archivist and my video person. To David Grossoff, who's my sound engineer. And especially, I'd like to say thank you to you for taking the time to listen, to rate us, to review us, to subscribe to us wherever you listen to podcasts. And it really, really helps if you tell your friends, word of mouth, best thing you could possibly ever do. That helps keep this thing going. So thank you for listening. We'll be back really soon. I'm sexual folklorist Dixie De La Tour, the founder, creator, coach, and every other thing at Body Storytelling. And here's a peek at what's next. And I turn and I grab Luke's face and I mash it into my crotch. Chelsea says, that's a nice cock you have there. And I say, yeah, I got it.

[Kevin]

At the Dollar Storm.