← Bawdy Storytelling
Bawdy Storytelling
Episode 60: ‘Cut a Bitch’ (Viktor Belmont)
00:31:05
Range Rovers & Supermodels FTW! When Viktor Belmont wins a Hookie Award for Best Newcomer Escort, this Trans Male sex worker wakes up to a ton of new client booking requests on Tumblr. But when a mysteriously beautiful female escort offers to fly...
Loading summary
Transcript15 lines
- [00:03]
Dixie de La Tour
February is upon us, and that means get ready for romance. But how romantic is it to squash into that way too popular restaurant at exorbitant special occasion pricing to show your beloved that you care? Well, the folks at Clona Willy have a brand new do it Yourself kit for this. February 14th, you can skip the crowds and celebrate your Hallmark holiday in a way that will bring you closer together. You can make a steak or a nice vegan goulash. Then get naked in the comfort of your own home and make a memory that lasts forever. More on Clone and Willy and a way to save later on in the show, y'. All. This podcast is graphic, so that means let's make sure that only adults are listening to this, because this one's got some dirty, dirty details. Okay, let's go.
- [00:57]
Victor Belmont
All of my life I've never fit But I won't complain and I won't.
- [01:04]
Narrator/Song Performer
Quit I am enormous. Get used to it. Everyone tells me I'm too much maybe it's just you're not enough for me can't you see I'm the kind of woman I'm supposed to be? Hey, my vagina is eight miles wide. Absolutely everyone can come inside. If you're ever frightened, just run and hide. My vagina is eight miles. Why?
- [01:54]
Victor Belmont
Why?
- [01:56]
Dixie de La Tour
Hi there and welcome to the Bawdi storytelling podcast. I am sexual folklorist Dixie de La Tour, and this is episode 60. 60. Holy fucking shit. 60. You know, I'm still kind of high from The Dawsey Easton 75th birthday celebration that happened this week. Oh, my God. We had people come from France and Israel and Canada, and we had this triad come in from New Zealand, and they came to me at the beginning of the show and said, you. You know, we listen to the podcast all the time. We came just for body storytelling. At the end of the night, they came back and they said, we can't believe of all the bodies we could have come to, we came to the one celebrating the author of the Ethical Slut. It was crazy packed and sold out. People sat down on the floor down front. Dawsey sat on stage on a throne. We celebrated her and she regaled us with stories and her friends regaled us with insider stories. And I have some friends who run a company called Cagedeak Cocktail Syrup. And it's kind of like this tamarind ghost pepper cardamom cocktail syrup. And I asked them to make special cocktails in honor of Dawsey for the evening. So we had the Mama owl, we had the Ethical Slut, which was Delicious. I drank those all night. And there was also the cbt, which is, you know, Dossy's a therapist and cock and ball torture is a thing she's into. So the CBT cocktail was so popular it sold out before the show even started. That one featured Caged Heat. Give it a try if you want. It's delicious. So Dawsey called me the next day. She said she couldn't imagine a better birthday party. It was the perfect way to send her off to the next big adventure. She's changing things up. 75, ready to do whatever she wants with the rest of her life. And she wanted to kind of mark that changeover from past Dawsey to new Dawsey. I was so proud to throw her that party. It was a rockin party, y'. All.
- [04:02]
Victor Belmont
I like this kind of party.
- [04:04]
Dixie de La Tour
I like this kind of party, baby. Let me tell you about this week's storyteller. Victor Belmont is an out and proud FTM trans man, award winning escort, Go Go Boy and butt toucher extraordinaire. From shaking it in the Castro to being a visible social media influencer, you'd be hard pressed to find him without a warm SM on his face and with a shirt on. If you don't see him on the dance floor, you'll find him supporting local LGBTQAI organizations through event production and volunteer work to continue to make spaces inclusive and advocating support for queer folks from all walks of life. I was introduced to Victor Belmont from award winning porn producer Mr. Pam. And you're going to get to hear Victor's first and only story so far. I definitely want him back. This storyteller is Victor Belmont. You can take it off if you want to, but make sure you're right up on the mic.
- [05:19]
Victor Belmont
Wow, this is the most applause I've ever gotten with this many clothes on. So. So here I am. I'm in a cold, cold apartment in the middle of winter in Chicago. I'm sitting on a duvet that's probably more expensive than my San Francisco rent. I'm wearing black latex gloves. I've got a hunting knife in one hand and an alcohol swab in another. Yeah, it's about to get real. And in front of me is somebody who the word supermodel can't even touch. She is by far the most beautiful woman I've ever seen my whole entire life. She's naked and she's on her knees and she's wearing a blindfold. She has dirty blonde hair. Her body's strong and sexy. She looks like Jennifer Aniston. If she was a rock climber, I don't know. And I'm about to give her something that she's never had, something that she has wanted more than anything in the world. So I had won a hooky award. Now, for anybody who doesn't know what a hooky award is, it's literally an award for hookers. And it was a ceremony thrown by rentboy.com. rentboy.com is a website where you can find male escorts. I was voted through an online poll to win best newcomer. And this was kind of a big deal because I was also the first trans male escort to ever win this award. Thank you. Yeah. Shameless police plug. Shameless plug. And right after I got this award, I got a flush of messages because people didn't even know that a trans male escort existed yet alone, that you could have a night with me or whatever you wanted. So immediately after getting this award, I woke up and I logged onto a website called tumblr.com you might have heard of it. There are nudes and dicks and butts and pictures of cats and pizza. And I had more messages than I could possibly comprehend. And I get a lot of messages on Tumblr anyways. Usually pretty aggressive dick pictures. But I got a message that kind of piqued my interest. It was from another escort and it was from a woman. I'm a gay escort now. If you've got the money, I've got the time. So I went ahead and opened the message. It was clear and concise. It was straight to the point. She asked if I could fly to Chicago. She asked if I could spend the weekend with her. And she said, when can you come? I wrote her back. And usually I wouldn't be so eager to see a first time client like this and spend a weekend with them. But honestly, I was broke as fuck. So I said, I can come anytime you want me to. She organized a ticket for me at sfo and before I knew it, I had thrown a couple things in my bag and I was on BART on my way to o' Hare. When I walked out of the airport. It was January in Chicago for anybody, anybody who's been to Chicago. Humans don't live in that shit. It was like I walked out of the airport being all like cute and stuff, wearing like a jeans jacket and a hoodie because what the fuck else do you wear in San Francisco? And it felt like somebody punched me in the throat. So I can barely text message and my gay little ass is like looking cute in this Levi's jacket. And. And I'm. I'm freezing. I'm like an icicle. I'm texting her and I'm like, hey, girl, where are you at? What's up? And she said, oh, I'm pulling up in a white Range Rover. When would you ever need a Range Rover in Chicago? And I was like, okay, cool, you know, whatever. So she pulls up. She neglected to tell me that this Range Rover had spinners on the hubs. So I'm like, get it, ho. She pulls up in this like, totally ridiculous Range Rover, which I'm living for. And I open the door and it's my first time seeing her. And I am breathless. I can't tell if it's cause I'm freezing to death or. She's so beautiful. And I can't even start to explain the scope of how attractive this woman is. I'm a solid nine in a sea of fours. Sea of fours. And she is a perfect 10. She's got the most beautiful gray eyes. And the first thing she says to me is, hey, Victor. And I say, hey, Jennifer. And I get into the car and she drives me to her beautiful townhome in Boys Town. So Boys Town is like the Castro of Chicago, and her townhome is gorgeous. She lets me in, and the first thing I know is that this is obviously where she takes her clients. This is her in call. This isn't where anybody lives. It's beautiful. It's got an incredible leather couch, a huge flat screen tv. It's got marble countertops. And the only thing on the countertops are like dozens of bottles of expensive whiskey. She also. I saw she was texting as we were driving. She gave me her Google voice number. This is how you know she's a pro ho. Because like, when you're a pro ho, you're like, I'm not giving you my phone number. So I knew that she was really high up there in the escorting world. So she asked me if I want a drink. And I say, no, I'm good. And she grabs a highball glass and one of those, like, big whiskey ice cubes, you know, the big chunky ones, Drops it in the glass, and she pours herself a humongous glass of Maker's Mark. She weighs like maybe 110 pounds. She's gonna black out. So I was like, okay, do what you want, whatever. And she walks over to the couch and we start talking. We make small talk. And I realize as we're making conversation, I'm asking questions about her that she hasn't blink. Weird. Weird. She hasn't blinked. And I sell the boyfriend experience. The boyfriend experience means that I pretend to be your boyfriend. There are a couple rules with the boyfriend experience. If you're hella good at it. The first one is, your client needs to be talking more than you are. And I was literally talking her ear off. I couldn't get anything from her. I tried to turn conversation around. It just. She had no warmth for me to grab onto. So I asked the question, what I ask every client that I have, I ask, hey, what does a perfect weekend look like with me? What do you want? I want to give you what you want. And she gives a little smile. It's the first time I've seen her really smile. I'm like, okay, cool. You're not a robot. She gives a little smile, and she downs the whole glass and puts it down on the table next to this beautiful leather couch. And she looks me straight in the eyes and she says, I want to drink the blood out of your body. This is some Dracula ass shit. This is. This is like. Every alarm in my mind is firing off right now. Run, bitch. Like, go. If you want to live, you got to make it out there. And she's dead serious. I'm freaking out internally, obviously, because any human would think that that's crazy, and you're obviously a vampire, but the wheels are turning in my head. She's smaller than me, and I can. Yeah, Yeah. I needed that money. I live in San Francisco. It's $15 for a sandwich here at Reyes. I needed that $2,500 per night. I was gonna get it. So I put on my big girl panties, and I was like, you know, on the outside, totally cool. I was like, all right. In what capacity? You want to, like, outcome myself and bleed on you? You want me to put it, like, in a martini glass? She's like, I want to suck it out of your body. And I was like, okay, okay. Internally freaking out. Don't run away. Don't sleep. And. And, you know, I make her feel comfortable. Like, I. I play it so cool that I'm like. I take lines like this every day. It's fine. It's casual. It's a casual thing. And she drinks a couple more glasses of whiskey, and I realize that this woman must be on a steady diet of, like, Jack Daniels, Maker's Mark, and Adderall. She's still standing, and I can tell the mood is starting to get sexual. The tension is palpable. I can tell that she's hungry for it. So I say, hey, babe, let's go to the bedroom. And I tell her to take all of her clothes off and get on her knees, and I put a blindfold over her. She can't see anything, but she can hear everything. And her body is shaking. I can see how badly she wants this. Maybe she's nervous. Maybe she's turned on. I put the blindfold on her, and my wheels are still turning in my head. I want her to think that I do this all the time. And literally I'm thinking, where the fuck am I gonna get a knife?
- [16:07]
Dixie de La Tour
What if I get bacteria in there.
- [16:09]
Victor Belmont
And it's an infection? I don't know. I remember that I brought my needles and syringes and alcohol swabs because I take a testosterone shot every week. And I'm like, okay, great. I can sanitize something with that. And then I remember that I always bring a hunting knife with me. I've had it forever. And I always bring it because you never know when you're gonna need to get a bitch. Yeah. Yeah, I planned that one. So she's still on her knees, and with a blindfold on, a sheen of sweat is starting to build on her beautiful, beautiful, tanned body. And I pull out my black latex gloves, my alcohol swabs, and my hunting knife. I get naked and I sit with my legs spread right in front of her. She's maybe a foot in front of my crotch, and I pull on my latex gloves. She can hear the sound of them slowly slipping over my hands and squeezing. The snap of them breaks the silence in the room. I sanitize my knife, and the smell of alcohol I think, is turning her on. She's starting to shake more. I look in between her legs and cum is dripping down her thigh. I haven't touched this woman yet. I haven't said barely a word. She's waiting in anticipation. I could break her with a single sentence. I pull her face closer to me, and it's the first time we've touched. And I take off the blindfold as I'm resting her head against my thigh. And her eyes aren't gray anymore, they're green. My knife is sanitized, and in front of her face, I slowly cut open my right thigh. And my knife is so sharp that I don't start bleeding immediately. It hurts so bad. And she immediately starts sucking onto my cut. I feel like I want to vomit. And I'm getting wet. I'm soaking her bed. I want to scream every part of Me says, run out of that room. But I can't get away from her. I see her fingers slowly moving in and out of her pussy. And she's rubbing her clit and she's breathing harder and harder and moaning harder and harder into my leg and sucking harder and harder. And I realize she's coming. Her body goes a little limp. And she looks at me with those beautiful, beautiful green eyes. And she immediately starts tasting me. She licks me and she makes me come faster than I've ever come. And I've never even come with a client. We spend the rest of the night fucking. Nothing short of primal. She matches me stroke for stroke, kiss for kiss, orgasm for orgasm. We're fucking so long that it's 6am and we have to go to sleep. When I wake up, she's gone. And there's a note on the bed. She had to take another client. She said that there was extra money for me to take a cab. And I was devastated. Who was this woman? Why did she make me feel that way? Why had I given so much to her? I had to spend 24 hours in this cold apartment that nobody lived in. And my cut still hurt so bad. But it still, to this day, makes me wet.
- [20:34]
Narrator/Song Performer
It's not easy having yourself a good time, Creasing out those bets and batteries, watching your ding don't go let her fucking kiss you both at the same time. Smells like something I've forgotten. Curled up tight and now it's light. I'm not a gangster tonight. Don't want to speak of the bad guy. I'm just a loner, baby and now you got in my way. I can't decide whether you should live or die. Or you'll probably go to heaven. Please don't hang your head and cry. No wonder why my heart feels dead inside. It's cold and hard and petrified. Locked the door that closed flies, we're going for ride. It's a bitch convincing people to like you. If I stop now, call me your quitter lies were cats you'd be a litter. Pleasing everyone isn't like you. Dancing jigs until I'm crippled slut and drinks I won't get pickled. I've got demanded to you. You play for all the same rules. It takes the truth to fool me. And now you made me angry. I can't decide whether you should live or die. Oh, you'll probably go to heaven. Please don't hang your head and cry. No wonder why my heart feels dead inside. It's cold and hard and Petrified Lock the doors and close by Keep going for a ride oh, I could throw you in the lake I feed you poison birthday cake I won't deny I'm gonna miss you when you're gone oh, I could bury you alive but you might crawl up with the knife and kill me when I'm sleeping that's why I can't decide whether you should live or die oh, you probably go to heaven Please don't hang your bed and cry no wonder why my heart feels dead inside it's gone and I and Petrified Lock the doors and close the blinds. We're going. All right.
- [23:18]
Dixie de La Tour
Wasn't that the perfect song? That was the Scissor Sisters with I Can't Decide. Is a long distance relationship keeping you and your lover apart? Or are the two of you still seeking that elusive unicorn? Have you dreamed of telling the world that Madame Tussaud's museum is asking after your vagina because it's famous? We all know your vagina is the best, so why not clone it? Your vulva's a staff favorite and its beauty should be preserved for eternity. And you can do it with the new clone, a pussy plus sleeve kit invented by a chemist made with 100% body safe material. You and your paramour can have a casting party a la Jimmy Hendrickson. The plaster casters guys. Clone and Willy knows how much you love sharing your pleasure pickle with the ones you love. And their infamous Clone Willy in home molding kit lets you make your date a gift that always fits. And good lord, it vibrates because seismic sex. Hells yeah. Go to clonawilly.com and use the promo code Dixie for 20% off your entire order. And you can spend Valentine's Day casting your goodies together. Share your beautiful beaver with a special someone. Go to cloneawilly.com for 20% off. Use the code Dixie and be brilliant. Give them a romantic custom gift this Valentine's Day. So we have a hangout coming up for supporters of our Patreon. If you go to patreon.com p a t r e o n.com body you know how to spell bodi, you can sign up and no matter what level you support us at, you'll be part of the hangout where you get to tell me about the kind of stories you're hoping to hear. Maybe you'll get to hear a story from me. I can tell you about some of the stories that have been been on my stage over the 12 years and you can help me figure out what's going to be next on the podcast. So go to patreon.com body give it whatever level you can and I'll be seeing your face very soon. You know how you go to a comedy show and you sit in the audience and you watch the show and then the show's over and then you go, well, I guess I get up and go home. Well, that's not gonna happen in Body Storytelling. I work really hard to craft a custom evening for you. If you leave your house, if you deal with your social anxiety and you come out and spend the evening with us, I will do everything in my power to make sure you have a life changing evening. We're gonna have bangos so you can talk to people, hear their stories, tell your own stories. You'll get to hear the stories on the stage. You'll get to hear custom crafted songs written just for body from super talented musicians. You'll get crafted cocktails with dirty names. Like maybe you see somebody attractive at the bar and you sidle up next to them and go, bartender, I think I'll have a schlong island iced tea. Then you make eye contact with the hottie. I tell you, I get your party started. So let me tell you about what's coming up for Body Storytelling. I sound a little excited because I just kind of locked down some new stuff and I want to tell you about it. On February 14, Best of Bodi, the very first one in Seattle. Go online in the show notes you will see a link. You choose the lineup for the Valentine's Day show. Don't worry, you don't have to have a date for Valentine's Day. Bodi is designed for you to come in by yourself, make new friends. You might not be leaving alone. And that's the perfect way to spend Valentine's Day. On February 23rd, our 12 year anniversary at 7pm we have body Storytelling celebrates a dirty dozen. It's not a dozen stories, but we do have Midori. We've got body storytelling superstar Jeffrey Allen Hayes and more. That's our 7pm show and at 10pm Best of Body San Francisco version, go online, choose the lineup and those people will be on stage. At the 10pm show on February 23, you pick them, they get on stage and tell you a story in March. On the 7th, we're in Seattle. On the 14th, we're in San Francisco. On March 16th and 17th, you guys, I am teaching a storytelling workshop in San Francisco. Private, exclusive location, beautiful view of the bay. You get so much of my time because it's going to be a really small class and I'm going to give you everything you need. The class is called crafting your perfect story and the spots are super limited on this. So go online to bodystorytelling.com and sign up for the class as soon as possible. Here's what's coming up after that, you guys. I just confirmed Saturday, April 13th in Seattle. We don't do Saturday night shows in Seattle and they've said, can you do like a super special extravaganza show if we give you a Saturday night? I'm like, I believe I can do that for you. So we have people flying in from all over to perform at this show. People you've seen on stage in other cities are going to be coming in and it's gonna be an amazing night. It's gonna be more than you usually get at a body and tickets will be online for that really soon. And then finally, May 17, I am doing a Friday night show to celebrate my birthday in San Francisco. The theme is Unicorn. This is the 10 year anniversary of the unicorn raffle, which was a bad idea that I had made many years ago. I decided to do an auction to raise some money for at the time it was a graphic designer whose computer was dying and they helped me with my website. So I wanted to help them get a new computer. This time I think it's probably going to help us fund touring for the show. So it's going to be Friday, May 17th. You know that awesome unicorn song that Rachel Lark sang a couple of weeks ago on the podcast? She'll be performing at the unicorn show. We'll have lots of extras. We'll probably have unicorns and a unicorn meet and greet. And it's gonna be a very special show. So I hope you can be at one of the big epic, not a comedy show kind of body storytellings that are coming up soon. And if you do come, be sure and come up and say hi to me in person. You know how much I like that. I want to see your face. It's time to say thank you. Thank you to podcast producer Marty Garcia, to sound engineer David Grossoff, to video archivist Joe Moore, to project manager Dana Hanna. And thank you to you. Thank you for telling your friends about it. If you tell just one friend we're gonna grow, our audience will double. And I'm so ready to grow y'.
- [30:09]
Narrator/Song Performer
All.
- [30:09]
Dixie de La Tour
So spread the word, rate us, review us, wherever you do those things. I just want to see this thing get bigger and better all the time. I'm sexual folklorist, Dixie de la Tour. And you've been listening to the body storytelling podcast. Here's Pika. What's next?
- [30:26]
Victor Belmont
She's like, so, hey, I know. I have this fantasy that I would love to do with you. I was like, okay, that sounds fun. That sounds great. What is it? She's like, I have always wanted to dress up like a hooker and meet a guy and have him take me home and have that kind of a dynamic with someone.