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Bawdy Storytelling
Episode 81: ‘Piledriver’ (Mr. Pam)
00:34:33
Are you a fan of Prime Rib and Creme Brulee? Well, Notorious Gay Porn Videographer Mr. Pam loves uncut Brazilian Manmeat MORE. Our talented heroine already likes her job - Naked Twinks! Muscles! Smegma! — and then she meets Rafael Alencar, who...
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- [00:02]
Dixie de La Tour
This episode of the Body Storytelling Podcast is brought to you by OMG yes. A video series that helps women with vaginas experience more pleasure. OMG yes. Is explicit yet comfortable. Sort of like friends sharing travel tips or recipes. Each technique is brought to life in beautiful videos of people with vaginas sharing their personal experiences. OMG yes. Asked thousands of women what felt best to them and found their patterns with no blushing and no shame. Learn more about OMG yes. And how to save on the series later on in the show.
- [00:45]
Musical Performer
All of my life I've never fit but I won't complain and I won't quit I am enormous but get used to it Everyone tells me I'm too much maybe it's just you're not enough for me can't you see I'm the kind of woman I'm supposed to be? Hey, my vagina is eight miles wide. Absolutely everyone can come inside. If you're ever frightened, just run and hide. My vagina is 8 miles.
- [01:40]
Dixie de La Tour
Hi there and welcome to the Bodi Storytelling Podcast. I am sexual folklorist Dixie de La Tour and This is episode 81. I just got back from an epic trip to my hometown in Virginia. I'm going to tell you about that in a minute, but first I want to tell you about something that is urgent that I need your help with. You may have heard a few episodes ago where I talked about Nancy Donoval, the award winning storyteller who has been battling MCS multiple chemical sensitivity for decades. She's been unable to work most of the time. She's existed off the kindness of friends who have guest rooms. And she has been teaching storytelling at a community college very part time. Not enough to support herself. That's been going on for a long time. And then she recently interviewed for a job at the premier school for storytelling in the U.S. east Tennessee state University. It's where the National Storytelling Conference happens. They are one of the best storytelling programs out there. She got the job and now we have to get her as soon as possible to this job. She found a home that can deal with her multiple chemical sensitivities. She's found a place to live. She's got the job and she needs our help to get her there. We have a GoFundMe for her and so far we've raised less than $1,500 but it's going to cost us about $15 per mile and it's just over 1,000 miles to get her entire life to Tennessee for this new job, herself, her belongings, her entire Existence needs to be in Tennessee for the upcoming school year, which means she's moving in the next two weeks to get everything there and to be set up for this new job, she needs to get from St. Paul, Minnesota to Johnson City, Tennessee, and she needs our help. We have a GoFundMe. Please give whatever you can so that we can get Nancy Donoval to this incredible new job. She is in her story right now. Things are happening right now and everything hangs in the balance. We need the generosity of people who can get my storytelling mentor, my hero to this incredible opportunity. It's going to take money up front to get her there. If you've listened to my stories, so many of them were coached by Nancy Donoval. So I'm going to have a link to the GoFundMe in the show notes or you can google Nancy Donoval and her last name is spelled D O N O V A L. And giving whatever you can will help us change the story. Her life is changing from being somebody who was reliant on other people to someone who controls her own destiny. You can change the story. You can do it. Please give generously. And I'm going to tell you a little bit about my visit to Virginia. I grew up in a small town called Montville, Virginia, and my mom celebrated her 80th birthday this week. Back in December, somebody gave her a Wonder Woman doll as a Christmas present and she burst into tears and said Wonder Woman was her childhood hero. So we started planning a Wonder Woman themed 80th Birthday Party and all her kids flew in. I have a bunch of brothers, their wives, their kids all flew into Montville, Virginia to throw a surprise party. Now, you'd think if all your kids were in for your 80th birthday, you would have put that together. And she knew that we were probably gonna get together and maybe eat some form of potatoes because I swear to God, I sat down to one meal and she offered me barbecue chicken with on the table to go with them asides. Potato chips, fried potatoes or potato salad. Three kinds of potatoes. So I was back in potato land this week. We knew that we were gonna do some sort of picnic or potluck. It's 100 degrees. It's pretty much July, you know, her birthday was June 28, but it was pretty much July in Virginia, which means over 100 degrees with 91% humidity. And we rented an enormous space in our hometown and all her little old lady friends and all the people who loved her brought in potlucks. We had so many different kinds of ambrosia salad. We had deviled eggs. We had way less sugar than we usually have at these things because usually there's nothing but sugar on the table. We had an enormous sheet cake with Wonder Woman on the top that said, happy 80th birthday, Edna. And when she walked through the front door, she was surprised by her entire community and her kids and her grandkids waiting for to wish her a happy birthday. People got on the mic and they read poems and people told stories and it was a really beautiful day. One of the best parts of this day was I have a friend Robina. And Robina is a burlesque performer and she often comes to bawdy storytelling dressed as Wonder Woman because she is an incredible wonder woman. And I had said the thing that would make this birthday for my mom is if we could tell her that a world famous Wonder Woman impersonator was flying into Montville, Virginia to help us throw this party. And so when Wonder Woman walked in with her golden lasso and her amazing brunette hair, when she walked in the room, all eyes were on her figure. And people would come up and they'd say, who are you and what are you doing here? I'd say, well, mom's a really big deal. So we flew in this Wonder Woman impersonator from Oakland just to be here today for mom's birthday. When I left, I heard my mom on the phone with one of her friends talking about the party. And the thing she said was, do you know that they flew in a famous Wonder Woman impersonator for my birthday party? Don't tell her. But really, it was my friend Robina who flew all the way to Virginia to make my mom's 80th birthday special. Mom said it was the best birthday party she'd ever had. And I'm exhausted from travel today, but it was totally worth it. OMGYes.com is a website about women's sexual pleasure. When it comes to the actual ways that people with vaginas touch themselves or the way that partners touch women, there are a lot of myths out there. So OMGS decided to do the first ever large scale scientific research, interviewing over 20,000 vagina havers aged 18 to 95 about what actually felt good to them and why. What they found was that of course people with vaginas vary in what they like, but there are also a lot of shared techniques. OMG yes is explicit. But these videos aren't intimidating. They feel comfortable. Sort of like friends sharing travel tips or recipes. This is not a subscription site. You Pay once and get permanent access to a set of videos and animations. And your payment goes on to fund ongoing research into sexual pleasure. Here's what you can find at omgs 47% of people with vaginas have had multiple orgasms. Lots of women think they can't have multiples because they get too sensitive right after the first. But by altering the technique after the orgasm in specific ways, many people can build to second and third orgasms. Omg. Yes. Season two just came out and it's all about penetration and the way that people can make penetration more pleasurable. While 18% of people with vaginas orgasm from regular in and out penetration, there are other penetration techniques that lead to orgasm for over 75% of women. And you can explore them all. Plus, researchers from Indiana University School of Medicine found that 95% of women experience pleasure in a way that physically new to them. After a month of using OMG. Yes. Check out season one and their newly released season two@omgyes.com oh, and use the promo code Dixie to get $5 off. Go to omgest.com Dixie right now and save.
- [10:11]
Mr. Pam
Are you ready for this episode?
- [10:12]
Dixie de La Tour
Storyteller. Let me tell you about a passionate and award winning gay porn director who's a videographer, photographer, and a proud perv. She's been working in the gay porn industry for over 15 years and that bio is a little out of date. So even longer than that, working for a variety of studios and she's traveled the world shooting men humping. Officially, she works as director of film production for Naked Sword. Unofficially, she loves playing with her gay boys, doing nightlife photography, hosting events, dressing in drag, traveling, doing stuff only bisexuals get to do, and breaking the rules. Mr. Pam's motto is stay into trouble and out of jail. When she finished this story and stepped off stage, she sent me a message the next day going, oh my God, I love that so much. I'm gonna start writing a book. Wouldn't you read that book? I would definitely read that book. This story is from Mr. Pam.
- [11:33]
Mr. Pam
What's cocksuckers? How are you tonight? Can I move this? Oh, my God. It's like a big cock. Okay. Oh, Jesus. Hi, everybody. Hi. So I have this ritual when the lights are set up and the sound is all set and the sheets are pretty clean and ready to go, and the lube and condoms at the side of the bed. And I just sit there and I'm waiting for the bottom to douche out his ass and I just put my camera between My legs. And I start cleaning the lens and get all the shmegma from whatever happened from the scene before that splashed on it. And it's my little meditative moment. So as I'm doing this, it's kind of like this. You're on the set and the lights are there and they're very hot. And I hear this joyous laughter coming down the hallway. I'm like, what is that? It's definitely not the bottom because usually it takes a really long time to douche. So I see this and all of a sudden out of this light comes this figure, this gorgeous man with these muscles and this long black hair that slicked back. And he just is bulging with sexiness like sex on wheels. And he comes a little closer. I'm like, wow. It's like if Popeye was kidnapped as a child and then all of a sudden kidnapped by this Brazilian gods and they turned him into the most perfect porn star in the world and set him in front of me there. Raphael Alencar. Beautiful. Gay boys know him, right? Yeah. Okay, okay, okay. So for the straight. Straight. Whatever, whatever. Okay. So he's just perfect. So he's walking down the hallway and he's flirting with everybody, like, oh, hey. Oh, hi. Hi. Hi. He has this really tight white tank top on and his hair is all there and he's barefoot and actually he's naked from the waist down and just fondling his junk. Because you know when guys are naked they have to play with it. So especially on a porn set, they're just playing with it. It's like if you have a 7 year old in a Tonka TR and you just like put it in their lap, like, don't play with it. They're like, I gotta play with it. So that's like guys when they're naked. So he's walking down the hallway and he's got his junk and like, hey, what's up? What's up? How are you? Pam? Hi. I'm like, okay. His hands are covered in penis, but whatever, he's really cute. So he comes up to me. Hi. Hi. What's your name, Mr. Pam. Which is Raphael. Okay, so we start the scene. So I'm doing camera. So it starts out and he's kissing and it's good. And he's got this little very clean twink because he took a while to clean out his ass. So they're kissing and then they're like doing some cock sucking and the twink's like crying. His tears are really good, you know? And Then we get to the anal, and so the little twinks bent over, and Raphael's, you know, going slow because this thing is fucking huge. Like, there's dick and then there's dick. Like, sometimes it's not a dick you want. Every day it's like prime rib. You don't want to eat it every day, but on occasion you're like, I'll have some prime rib with creme brulee. It's like both of those together. So he's starting really slow. It's like a baby's arm. Like, if a baby were to fist you, that would be Raphael. I'm not into pedophile, okay? So he's doing it. So the twink's warming up, and all of a sudden he grabs him and he flips him up and down. And the twink's little pink hole is, like, looking up. And I'm over Raphael. And Raphael's got his big dick and he's just. And I'm over. I'm like, oh, my God, this is the best piledriver shot ever. And just come everywhere. It was beautiful. So we became really good friends after that. So we worked together for many years. Dozens of scenes. And, like, when you work with a model a lot, you kind of get to know them. So I knew what he did. So it's like a wall. If he's fucking and I'm shooting him and we're going up and then they grab the throat and then they come down and I come down with them. And it's just this. It's like Dancing with the Stars, but porn. So we're doing it and we just got our groove on. It's awesome. So we both end up moving to New York. And this one day after the set, I had like 400 pounds of luggage in a fifth floor walk up. Yeah, thanks. New York. Have you been there? Yeah. It's summer. Yes. It gets worse. So I'm like, I can't carry all this shit upstairs. He's like, I'll help you. I'll help you. So we lug everything up the stairs and we collapse on the couch. And then all of a sudden he's like looking at me. So when are we gonna fuck? And leans in and kisses me. I'm like, whoa, what are you doing? Like, I totally thought you were gay. He's like, no, I'm Brazilian. Like, okay, so I'm kind of a slut. So we start making out and. And if I close my eyes, it was one of those, like, oh, my God, his skin feels so good. And kiss her and everything. It was just like, this is a really hot fuck. Then I open my eyes, I'm like, whoa, what are you doing? I'm usually on top of you with a camera. Like, all of a sudden, I'm in the porn scene and you're on top of me and you're fucking me and I'm touching you. This is so surreal. Okay. Hot fuck. Ah, weird. Hot fuck. Weird. So it was hot. So we continued doing it because I'm a big old slut pornographer and he's a porn star hooker. One of the biggest award winning hookers in New York. He's. Yeah, he's amazing. So we get it on. And then this one day, we're hanging out in Central park and we're walking around doing like, what normal people do. We had like a normal day. It was daylight and we're out. So we're sitting on this bench and we're having this conversation. And he's kind of rubbing my hand. It was like somewhat romantic. And he looks at me and then he pops the question. He's like, we should have a baby. What? What? No. Oh, my God. I'm like a world traveler gay pornographer. And you're a big old hooker and like, what are we gonna do? And, like, take your kid to work day? Like, hi, this is mom and dad. And I shoot dad fucking guys in the asshole. Like, no, I don't know. No, no, no, no, no. Come on, it'll be fun. No, no, no, no. So whatever. So he had to go see a client and I went home to work on a porn script. So we're like, okay, that's kind of cute. So a few hours later, I get a phone call and it's him. The man. Oh, my God. Da, da, da, da. When he gets real rowed up, he forgets English. So he's teaching Portuguese. And I don't really know any Portuguese other than tutu bon. So I'll just say, tutu bon. Tuto bon. Tuto bon. That means, how are you? I know that's not what he said, but. So he's freaking out. So I'm like, okay, what's wrong? He's like, ah, you have to come over. So I come over to his house and get in a cab, go uptown, and I let myself in slowly. I'm like, I don't know what I'm walking into too. So open the door and there's like really dark. You know, he's a hooker, so he's got the music, you know? The. The lighting going, and there's this, like, freaky techno. And in the background, I could see a silhouette of this guy, kind of, like, normal, like, putting his shirt on and wiping his nose and sniffling. I'm like, okay, whatever. He sees me. He's like, ah. Like. Like a cockroach. Like, okay, so he runs in the bathroom, and so I go over, and Raphael's laying on the bed in which was once this beautiful cock. This beautiful cock that I cherish and I worship from afar in an ear. And it's just there, and it's just kind of mangled. Like, it's purple and red, and it looked like. You know when a python, like, eats something, eats its prey, but it's a little big, and it's. That's too big. And there's something inside of it squirming, and it's kind of to the side. And I'm like, what the fuck is going on with your dick? He's like, I don't know. The guy was just like, fuck me harder. Fuck me harder. Fuck me harder. And I'm fucking him harder. I'm fucking him harder. And all of a sudden, I missed his hole and I hit the thing, and it just kind of. I know. True story. What? I think I broke my dick. I'm like, okay. So I gather what's left of his penis in this, like, towel with some ice, and, like, get him in the car. And then the client with us, we're all in a cab. Okay, note, if you walk away with anything tonight, if you hire a hooker and you're high on cocaine and you're screaming at him to fuck you harder, and all of a sudden he misses and he breaks his dick. And then you could at least pay for services rendered or pay for the cab. Okay, thank you. Okay, back to the story. So we're in the cab, and all of a sudden, Mr. Cokehead, like, jumps out of the cab. He's like, fuck you. So we get to the hospital, and so Raphael doesn't want to tell everybody that he's a prostitute, because I guess that's illegal. So he goes and gives his own stories to the nurse. So I'm walking through, and the nurse is just like, mm, what I know about you. Yeah, I'm keeping my man away from you. You a dick breaker, bitch. For real? For real. Okay, thanks, Rafael. I didn't want to tell him. Thanks. Okay. So then the dick doctor comes up, like, urologist, I guess, and she's like, well, it looks like you have a penile Fracture. So we're going to have to operate right away. And, you know, chances are pretty, pretty good, but there might be some slight chance of erectile dysfunction in your future. And we're gonna have to circumcise you. And both of us are like, no, you don't even know. This is a world famous gay porn star and he's won awards for his big uncut cock. And you can't do this. And why would you even try to circumcise him? You have to fix it. We're gonna have a b. She's like, I'll do what I can. So he gets whisked off, and I'm sitting in the waiting room for like four hours. Like, oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Save the dick. Save the dick. Save the dick. Save the dick. Save the dick. What's he gonna do? He could go back to being a dentist, I guess. I don't know. He could, like. We could move in with my family. What does he do? I mean, he makes his money off of his dick. So she comes out, she's like, okay, I have some good news. We think it's a success. Think, okay, but we, we won't really know for a while, okay. Because he's very swollen. But we think we saved his foreskin. Okay, so he needs a lot of bed rest, a lot of icing, and no hard ons and no sex for at least six weeks. I know, I know. Can you imagine? Six weeks? Okay, so if I was thinking, I wasn't quite sure I'm ready to have a baby. Taking care of a post op dick from a Brazilian is just like taking care of a newborn. You have to cater to it and swab it and feed it and burp it. And if it starts crying or getting hard, you have to calm it back down. I'm like, it was like six weeks of hell. So we made a pact, okay? So let's go through the six weeks. If we can handle it, then we'll go to Puerto Rico and celebrate. So six weeks goes by. Two things about Rafael is he loves to fuck and he loves to travel, but he does not like to plan anything. So we land in Puerto Rico, we get a rental car, and we start driving. We're like, ok, this is cute. But me being a total control freak.
- [22:47]
Dixie de La Tour
I'm like, I don't even know where.
- [22:49]
Mr. Pam
We'Re going to stay. Okay, so we see in this little village, there's this shack and a bar type thing with these four old Puerto Rican men. They're just Sitting there smoking. And there's a dog that's itching itself. And some lighting. It's starting to get dark. And we pull over it. Excuse me, is there a bed and breakfast around here? Something mi espanol S, S E? S E. You know my taco Spanish. So they're like, oh, yeah, man, you could come up here. I'm like, okay, no, this looks like an insane asylum. I guess it was an old abandoned hotel that had been there forever. And they're like, no, no, no, my cousin is here. You could come. Stay here. It's fine. Oh, come on, my friend, give me $40. We find you a blanket. I'm like, okay, so fine. So we go upstairs. If I was by myself, I would have, like, ran out screaming because as something straight out of a horror movie. But I'm with him. And when you like someone, you put on those rose colored glasses. Everything's okay. So we kind of make do with what we have. The whole hotel was abandoned. So we're out on this little porch and we got some food we found at the side of the road and we had a little picnic. And then we went in our room and I put a little pashmina over the light and kind of scurried away the cockroaches. And we're trying to calm down. And then it's time. It is time to test out the new penis. Okay, so we're like kissing and everything, and it's going. Okay. Are you okay? Yeah. Are you okay? Yes, I'm fine. Okay, so then, like, pulls his pants down and it's getting hard. And it's okay to get hard now because the doctor said so. It's growing and it's growing and it looks okay. It looks good. It's got some scarring around the top, but things are holding together. So I'm like, well, let me give it a little kiss, you know? Okay. Okay. Smells. Okay. Okay, this is good. All right. So, okay, this is the moment of truth. So Raphael's laying down with this enormous dick, and I'm like, over him. Like, okay, and I got my little sexy number on, and I'm like, over him. You know, I'm like, kind of lowering down. And all of a sudden I'm like, holy fuck. I have this whole sexual future right between my legs. If anything goes wrong, we are fucked. There is no medical facility anywhere near where we are. And if I break it again, oh, my God, he'll never. And he looks at me with those little brown eyes. I'm like, okay, okay, okay. Okay. It's okay. We could do this. I'm like, all right. So I'm lowering down. It's touching. Are you okay? Yeah. Okay. Okay. We got an inch. Are you okay? Yeah, I'm good. Okay. Okay. Okay. Two inches. Good. All right. Some people, that's all they have, but we're going for 12. Okay. Three, four. I'm pretty good with four or five. But no, let's do the whole thing. All of a sudden.
- [25:26]
Dixie de La Tour
Down.
- [25:28]
Mr. Pam
We're in. We're in. We achieved it. Yes. The dick was intact, the sex was good, and we both came. Woo hoo. Yeah. So now when we're back on the porn set and we're doing that epic piledriver and I'm leaving over on him and he's looking over at me and we just give that little wink because he knows and I know because of his urologist and my magical vagina that we saved the world of gay porn. Thank you very much.
- [26:22]
Musical Performer
Sam. Sa do it like I like it too I turn it on, turn it up show me what you got. You turn me on Turn you on. You're so fucking hard. Watcha keep just the way you are don't bother changing for me I'll rewind and body star I want you just the way you are don't bother changing for me I'll rewind and watch you I love to watch you take it from me seems to make you smile. Love the rock, Love the rock. It's pretty wet. Pretty hard. Turn it on, turn it up show me what you got Just the way you are don't bother changing for me I'll rewind and B star I want you just the way you are don't bother changing for me I'll be winded by you. Sam.
- [30:42]
Dixie de La Tour
That was Porn Star by Faster Pussycat. Do you want to know how to make the world a better place? Support the Body Storytelling podcast. Your support on Patreon is going to help us grow the episodes. It's going to help us pay for music licensing and podcast production and web hosting and all of the things that are the expenses incurred for this free podcast. We know you want to support us. We know you love this podcast because I get emails from people just like you all the time. Lives are being changed. And you supporting this podcast means that you can change lives. You can do it yourself just by supporting us. P-A-T-R-E-O-N.com body and thanks in advance for your support. Just a couple of shows left and then we're going on hiatus. Let me tell you about the remaining shows that we have for live body storytellings July 18 in Seattle. The theme is Bottoms Up. True Stories of Anal Drinking Submission. Any all, we have one spot left as of right now. You might be in it, so send me your story@dixieaudistorytelling.com if you'd like to be on stage in Seattle on July 11, then on July 18 in San Francisco. The theme is all the Way. I made it a really broad theme so that your story can fit in this shelf. We're also continuing our Win a Sibian raffle where you buy a ticket for the raffle and you might get a free sample of the Sibian. And if you've never experienced this super high end sex toy, I hate to say that that doesn't sound like it adequately describes the Sibian. This thing is impressive. But yeah, we've got stories, we've got cocktails, we've got Sibians, we've got an amazing evening and that will be our last show until September. If you'd like to come see me tell a story, I'll be performing at the National Storytelling Summit in Fremont, California on Saturday, July 27. You know how I get around the vanilla world. Sometimes I feel like a dirty, dirty girl. And I'd love to have some supportive bawdy fans in the audience as I get on stage and tell my story in front of a crowd. Then we're going on hiatus and I would love to start asking you questions about what you'd like to hear on the podcast, what you want more of, what you want less of. Great ideas. People have been sending me some interesting ideas on how to make the podcast better and I'd love to hear what you think. Dixiebodystorytelling.com Help make the body storytelling podcast even better for season five. Holy shit. Thank you. Thank you for listening. Thank you for telling your friends. Thank you for giving us reviews. Wherever you do reviews, the written reviews rock my world. Please do that. And thank you to the people who make this podcast possible. Team Body is sound engineer David Grosso, podcast producer Marty Garcia, project manager Dana Hanna, video archivist Joe Moore. I am sexual folklorist Dixie de La Tour. This has been episode 81 of the podcast and here's a peek at what's next.
- [34:16]
Mr. Pam
Turns out a lot of women like to get their pussy licked. And when I learned that, I thought, okay, I'm gonna set out to make this my signature move.