Bawdy Storytelling – Episode 84: ‘Plot Twist’ (Andy Miles & a Surprise Guest)
Date: August 14, 2019
Host: Dixie De La Tour
Main Storyteller: Andy Miles
Special Guest: Andy's partner Raj (referenced)
Episode Length: Approx. 57 min (content-run)
Overview: Main Theme & Purpose
In this lively and sex-positive episode, Dixie De La Tour kicks off the fifth season of Bawdy Storytelling by featuring two raw and riveting personal stories about sexual transformation and unexpected intimacy. The episode’s centerpiece is Andy Miles’ deeply honest “Plot Twist,” chronicling his path from a queer, poly, kinky woman in Atlanta to a trans man living and loving in San Francisco. Through explicit, heartwarming, and humorous tales, Andy explores gender, self-realization, and the pivotal role lovers and partners play in our journey of becoming. Dixie then follows with a hilarious “worst sex ever” saga that’s equal parts cringe and comic gold, driving home Bawdy’s core message: honest storytelling about sex changes lives.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. Dixie’s Welcome & The Power of Storytelling
- Dixie, fresh from a podcast hiatus, shares how much she’s missed the audience's connection and feedback, introducing new ways for listeners to share stories and shape Bawdy’s next tour stops. (03:00)
- Quote (Dixie; 02:55):
“Having a hiatus from the things that you do all the time… is awesome... But I haven’t had contact with you very much... and those were the things that lit up my day.”
2. Andy Miles’ Story: Sexual Discovery & Gender Transformation
Early Sexual Adventures in San Francisco (06:45–09:25)
- Andy recalls moving to San Francisco from Atlanta and embracing a new world of sexual freedom and community.
- Details his first fisting experience, open sexual exploration, and deepening involvement in the Bay Area sex-positive scene.
- Quote (Andy; 07:38):
“I learned that my fist could fit inside another human, and it was amazing.”
Sex Parties & the ‘Daddy’ Epiphany (09:26–13:00)
- Andy describes attending inclusive consent-focused sex parties, sharing desires in ‘mildest and wildest’ rounds, and connecting with a stranger (Jason) who becomes a regular lover.
- His sexual preferences evolve towards topping men and being called “daddy.”
- Quote (Andy; 06:54):
“People always ask me how I knew I was trans. And it started with somebody calling me daddy.”
Gender Play, Jealousy, and Recognition (13:01–19:10)
- Andy envies a lover’s top surgery, explores male clothing, and is frustrated by her own body's mismatch with her gender identity.
- These experiences fuel further curiosity about gender and identity expression.
The Pivotal Weekend: ‘Can I Please Suck Your Cock, Daddy?’ (19:11–23:00)
- Andy recounts a pivotal sexual weekend with Jason, in which receiving affirming dirty talk (being called “daddy,” and references to a cock and chest) helps Andy feel seen as a man for the first time.
- The emotional aftermath is profound: “I just… held him and I cried and just said, thank you.” (21:40)
- The abrupt return to the outside world (being ‘ma’amed’ by a barista) illustrates the difficulty of societal recognition amidst gender questioning.
Coming Out to Partner, Mutual Growth, and Transition (23:01–26:25)
- Andy faces the challenging process of coming out to his husband Raj, who responds with insight and unwavering support:
Quote (Raj, as told by Andy; 24:42):
“We promised to be nerds together and have adventures together. I am going to hold you through this, and we’re going to figure it out.” - They pursue therapy, talk with other couples navigating transition, and do exhaustive research.
- With Raj’s encouragement, Andy begins testosterone, eventually undergoes top surgery, and grows into affirmation of his authentic self.
- Quote (Andy; 25:54):
“Now my chest finally looks the way that I want it to in T-shirts. I am forever thankful to Jason for seeing the man in me and to Raj, who… stayed married to a bi man.”
3. Dixie’s Story: ‘Worst Sex Ever’ Craigslist Adventure (34:00–51:40)
- Dixie introduces the monthly themed storytelling format, then builds suspense around not having a “worst sex ever” story—so she posts a Craigslist ad to find one. (36:54)
- The winner: Marco, whose email includes a photo labeled ‘hung.jpeg’ (spoiler: he’s not).
- Dixie endures a long trek upstairs, engages in extremely awkward sex full of misplaced bravado, repetitive “Are you okays?”, and finally, an anatomical mishap and pulled hamstring.
- Memorable Moment (Dixie; 48:30):
“At a certain point, I just decide it’s time to take matters into my own hands... I slam his dick all the way to the hilt in my ass. And from behind me, I hear a high-pitched scream.” - Afterward: Dixie realizes the lesson in ambiguity—she never specified who the “worst sex” should be worse for!
- Final punch (Dixie; 51:25):
“As I head down those stairs at Marco’s house, it occurs to me, you know, I didn’t really specify who the worst sex was going to be for, did I? That’s my story.”
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments (with Timestamps)
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On sexual exploration and affirmation:
- “After that, I called my husband... said, hey, our wedding ring has been completely immersed in this amazing human.” (Andy, 07:57)
- “I too have a new dick today and my wildest desire is for some guy to give me a blowjob and then let me fuck him.” (Andy, 11:05)
- “At that point I felt—maybe I do actually have a dick attached to me that I was born with. It’s a total and complete mind fuck.” (Andy, 20:20)
- “I can fuck you while you’re still wearing that [harness] ...You have a beautiful chest, Daddy.” (Jason, recounted by Andy, 21:30)
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On marriage through gender transition:
- “We promised to be nerds together and have adventures together. I am going to hold you through this, and we’re going to figure it out.” (Raj, as told by Andy, 24:42)
- “On our second date, when I came out to him as bi, he said, oh, thank God.” (Andy, 22:55)
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On Craigslist sexual misadventure:
- “I don’t know who told him he has the biggest dick in the world, but he bought that shit hook, line and sinker.” (Dixie, 46:40)
- “You shouldn’t go back and forth between my two holes, so you should just stay back there.” (Dixie, 48:10)
- “When you did that thing where you reared back on me, I pulled a hamstring. I am in excruciating pain right now.” (Marco, via Dixie, 50:10)
Timestamps for Major Segments
- [02:13] — Dixie’s Biographical Storytelling Introduction and Hiatus
- [06:45] — Andy Miles’ story starts
- [12:10] — Sex party ‘mildest and wildest’ game
- [19:11] — The pivotal daddy moment with Jason; gender euphoria
- [23:01] — Coming out to Raj, navigating transition as a couple
- [26:25] — Andy’s story concludes
- [34:00] — Dixie’s “worst sex ever” story begins
- [36:54] — Posting the Craigslist ad, receiving responses
- [40:12] — Meeting Marco and arriving at his apartment
- [47:05] — The “are you okay” sex mishap and climax
- [50:10] — Aftermath: pulled hamstring and reflection
- [51:41] — Upcoming show announcements and how to pitch stories
Tone & Atmosphere
The episode balances bawdy humor, effusive sex-positivity, and moments of vulnerability and transformation. Andy’s story is raw, honest, and uplifting—demonstrating the powerful affirmation that can come from being truly seen by lovers and partners. Dixie’s tale, in contrast, is defiantly self-deprecating and riotous, cementing the show’s mission: to celebrate life’s sexual plot twists, misfires, and revelations with unblushing candor.
Additional Highlights
- Music Interludes: Uplifting and humorous musical performances bookend and punctuate the stories, including “My Vagina is Eight Miles Wide” and Cody Chesnutt’s “I Look Good in Leather.”
- Community Engagement: Dixie encourages listeners to join the Bawdy Facebook group, share their own stories, and participate in the ongoing tour via the “Test Tickle” online poll.
- Call to Action: Listeners are invited to pitch stories for upcoming live shows by sending voice memos.
In summary:
Episode 84 of Bawdy Storytelling is a rollercoaster of honest, sex-positive tales told with wit, warmth, and an open invitation to embrace your own messy, beautiful plot twists. Andy Miles’ journey from femme to affirmed trans man shines as a testament to the transformative power of partnership and being seen. Dixie’s comedic misadventure reminds us: sometimes the worst sex stories make the best stories—especially when shared among friends.
